Gilbert Gottfried's Amazing Colossal Podcast - Mini #223: GGACP Listener Society Mailbag

Episode Date: July 4, 2019

This week: "Mad Dog and Glory"! A Quinn Martin Production! Appreciating Burt Bacharach! The gangster films of James Cagney! Frank reveals beloved bedtime stories! And the Irish-Catholic comedy of Gilbert Gottfried! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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This is one of many sounds in Tennessee with a story to tell. To hear them in person, plan your trip at tnvacation.com. Tennessee sounds perfect. Hi, this is Gilbert Gottfried, and I'm here with my co-host Frank Santopadre, and this is Gilbert and Frank's Amazing Colossal Obsessions, and we're here with the late Ray Bone. Coming to you from the great beyond. Paul, you're looking well.

Well, I do. You know, from who's born, no traveler returns. I returned. Yes. I'm back. How do you feel? A little shaken. Okay. How was the, we're all shaking.

Griffin Dunn was just here and we were laughing quite a bit. Gilbert found out he was Martin Scorsese's favorite comedian. Yes. Yes. And that's why I'm in so many Martin Scorsese films. I loved you in Kundun. And you know what I forgot to ask him? I think that Griffin Dunn took Carrie Fisher's virginity.

You forgot. We've got to have him back. How could you forget to ask that? I know. It was the top of his list. It was the first thing on his piece of paper, on the Eskimo pie wrapper that he scrawls his questions in. It's not worth listening to the rest of the episode if that's not in there. I mean, you know.

A little quick housekeeping. We did a live episode the other day. How did you think it went? Oh, good. Very good. We had a live episode the other day. How did you think it went? Oh, good. Very good. We had a good time. Paul was there. How many people do you think we had there?

Has anyone actually listened to it yet? I have not had a chance yet. I went home immediately, took the card out of the recorder, loaded it onto my computer. There you go. Copied it to another drive. It sounds great. All right, you cynics out there, we have it. This one was gonna be

Cursed and lost Well we had it When Frank left home This afternoon Who knows It was fun Paul was there We sang I don't know

Eight songs Nine songs Something like that At Sid Gold's request room And Showed how versatile The show really is Good night

Dara got up Into Delta Dawn Little Helen Reddy We sang Happy birthday to Lily Oh that's right Gilbert's daughter Yes Max came out As a clone of his father Sarah got up into Delta Dawn. Little Helen Reddy. We sang happy birthday to Lily. Oh, that's right. Gilbert's daughter.

Max came out as a clone of his father. Max came out as Gilbert clone. Yeah, Max threw his arms out and bit a Gilbert face. A memorable night. Other quick notes. People are digging the Chip Kidd episode. Oh, yeah. Chip was great. And also Jeff Ross and Attell.

I laughed to death. Jeff Ross and Attell. That I laughed to death. Jeff Ross and Attell? Oh, man. I really liked that. It was so funny. I asked him about porn and Dave said, I've become a faith-based comedian, Frank. Really a fun night. Thank you, Arnie.

Happy birthday to Sonny Fox. Oh. Who turned 94 years young. Oh, happy birthday, Sunny Fox. How about that? How about that? That was one of those surprise ones where with Sunny Fox, I always thought, oh, well, come on.

It'll be a cute. Kids say the darndest things. And what a fascinating story. Not one of those episodes where you call me the day of and you say, I don't know about this guy. Is there really anything interesting about this guy? I do that with every... Every frigging week. Somebody's got to keep an eye on Frankie.

I saw an interview with him and he sounded really boring. That dour gets into the act. Oh, I watched the same YouTube video. You sure this guy's going to talk? Yeah. Yes, I've been researching them for eight months. Oh, and I got a great tweet from someone. I wish I remembered his name, of course.

But somebody tweeted and said, this is the only podcast where the host interrupts a guest to say, oh, wait, I just thought of another Jewish Bond villain. Yes, we're proud of that. Yes. Let's see. Get well, Frank Conniff. Oh, my God, yes.

Our wonderful friend Frank Conniff had some surgery. He is on the mend and doing well. Some of our friends and fans asked about Frank on Facebook. We love friends, Frank Conniff, had some surgery. He is on the mend and doing well. Some of our friends and fans asked about Frank on Facebook. We love you, Frank. Scott Alexander had a birthday. Wow. Your buddy. Problem child.

Yes, yes. Another. One of the writers of Problem Child. Yes, another previous podcast guest. And I just want to wrap with this. Scott Alexander and Rudy Tutski. Rudy Tutski? Yeah, Rudy previous podcast guest. And I just want to wrap with this. Scott Alexander and Rudy Tutski. Rudy Tutski? Yeah, Rudy Tutski.

Is that like Giggles Gazoo? Giggles Gazoo. That you designed when you decided it was the Wonder Woman actress? Israeli actress Giggles Gazoo. Happy birthday to Scott, to Sonny Fox. And this one, I just want to end housekeeping with this because this is fun. We heard from a fan named Marty Schalders.

I hope I'm saying his name right. S-H-A-L-D-E-R-S. He wrote me on Facebook to say that in honor of the famous odd couple Let's Make a Deal episode, that he and a friend were dressing up as a horse and going on Let's Make a Deal.

Oh, wow. The current Let's Make a Deal show. Wow. They're going to be on the June 25th taping, the two of them as different ends of a horse, as an homage to Felix and Oscar. And I said I got to tell Gilbert that because that's just beyond the pale.

Let's get to what this episode is, a quick mini episode. We always get complaints that when we do listener mail, it's always Twitter. Yes. And so why don't you reach out to Patreon and why don't you reach out to the listener society? Well, we have. So we're going to do it. We'll do a Patreon one in a couple of days or weeks.

But right now we're going to do the Gilbert Gottfried Amazing Colossal Listener Society. I posted a solicitation and I got some interesting questions, which I'm going to fire the the gilbert godfrey amazing colossal listener society i i posted uh a solicitation and i got some interesting questions which i'm going to fire at gilbert oh okay feel free to jump in this was the first one brendan joyce writes okay within seconds of me posting gilbert better quinn martin production with a private eye that was too fat or too old? Cannon or Barnaby Jones? Oh, boy. No, well, Cannon was the fat one. Yes, but he wants to know which one was the better show of the two. One was too fat, one was too old.

Oh, gee. Which was your preference? The too old guy or the too fat guy? Do you know, I never actually watched either one on a regular basis. I never did either. I don't think I did. But I love the openings. Oh, yes.

I used to go, tonight's episode. Oh, my God. Death on a merry-go-round. They had those very cryptic Quinn Martin titles. Here's an actual question. Richard Pachter, what old movies do you like to watch with your kids? I don't have kids. I assume this is directed at you.

Oh, God. What do you guys watch? I don't know. It's assume this is directed at you. Oh, God. What do you guys watch? I don't know. It's so hard to get them to watch. Yeah, they don't want to watch anything in black and white for one thing. Well, you and Max used to watch the Universal Classics. Yeah. I mean, one of my proudest moments was one time my son, when he was like about you know a few months old he's he he drew something on his chest

and pointed it to him and said i'm the wolf man i love it because it was like the sign of the pentagram can you get lily to watch old movies or or because she another will they watch you in anything will they watch a problem child yeah Will they watch Problem Child or Aladdin? Sometimes I'll get them to watch it. Other times, oh, I remember one time Max, when he was tiny, was sitting with Dara in a coffee shop, Sarah in a coffee shop staring at a man sitting by himself and going, Mommy, that man looks like Lon Chaney Jr. Wow.

If he said George Zucco, I would have. And I thought, that's my son. That's your son. So this is a perfect segue. Matthew Bradley Churgy. How would you pronounce this, Paul? T-S-C-H-I-R-G-I Look it up. Given his love of the Wolfman, did Gilbert enjoy the process of being made up as a werewolf for an up all night promo?

Any memories of that? Yeah, well I like anything that has to do with monsters. Did you enjoy that experience? Yeah, and they did a transformation scene in that. And they also did a transformation of me turning into a vampire in Son of the Beach. Very cool. Yeah. Andrew LaPasha.

Did Gilbert ever get to meet any of the classic comics from radio or early TV? Hope, George Burns, Red Skelton, Lucille Ball. Any of these people? Wow. None of those people. You never met any of them? No. Never met Lucy?

Never met Lucy. I could see you and Lucy hanging. I met Milton Berle. You met Uncle Miltie. I met Miltie too. Yeah. Yeah. Sean Patrick Brady,

you guys have quite a few fans here in Australia, so I'll throw this one at you. Do you have any favorite Aussie films? The Piano? Yeah. Oh. Remember that one?

Yeah, with the Jane Campion picture. I think that's the only one. No, there are a few. Do you like the Mad Max pictures? Do you like the Road Warrior pictures? Oh, I only saw one of them. I thought, oh, okay. How about Walkabout or uh

okay walkabout i think walkabouts jenny jenny agater and she's naked in it shades of grip and done yeah who just left the room so in that case walk about anything with anything with jenny agater i will say the last wave which is made by the same director like the late nicholas rogue it's something i would not put on the list of the crocodile dundee movies no we're noser all you would wait who directed uh the one with um uh uh that donald sutherland and Julie Christie. Same guy. Nicholas Rogue. Yeah. Don't look now.

He just died. There was always that rumor that the two of them were actually fucking each other. And that Warren Beatty got on a plane and flew to the set to investigate firsthand. Oh, wow. That's part of that rumor.

Because, of course, he was sleeping with Donald Sutherland. Yes. Let's see. I was sleeping with Donald Sutherland. Yes. Let's see. I was sleeping with Elliot Gould at the time. Ed McDonald says, I have more of a comment. In one episode, Gilbert remarked that no one reads newspapers anymore. Well, I am a librarian in a public library, and people read our newspapers.

He's angry. Granted, it's old men fighting over the crossword, but the papers are being used. Okay, Joel Beaver has an apt question. Has Gilbert seen the accidental nudity of Jessica Rabbit in Who Framed Roger Rabbit? No. Are you familiar with this? You don't get into cartoon nudity, do you? Well, yes.

I mean, I've seen those where they slow it down. Yeah. And they've had, I think, where they draw a dick for Bugs Bunny. And they have it in one frame so you can't see it unless it's slowed down. Let's see what else I have here. Robert Martin, I always look forward to hearing that Burt Bacharach style horn in the bridge section of the closing listener mail theme. Well, that's our friend John Fodiatis. That's right, who's a Bacharach fan.

He's a Bacharach devotee. Maurice Bershtinsky, also in Australia, says definitely Bacharach composition style. So they're noticing your tricks, John. We got to get Bacharach on the show. Yeah, Richard Marks is recording with him right now. Yeah. If one of us could get to Richard Marks. Oh, wait, we can.

Oh, yes. Darren, we got to chase Burt Bacharach. I think he just turned 91. Maurice also asked, Maurice Bershtinsky, our friend, favorite non-English language films? Do you guys like Italian films by De Sica or Japanese films by Kurosawa? Oh, well, of course, you know, the bicycle. It's a great one.

Yeah. Yeah. And what was the other one? There's some great ones. Umberto D is a great movie Yes, yes Shoe Shine I love Kurosawa

Cinema Paradiso Cinema Paradiso is a very good movie That's a great movie Yeah Beautiful music too by Yes Morricone Morricone

Ennio Morricone Yeah, that's There's a good one Does Life is Beautiful count? Life is Beautiful? Sure Yeah, why not? It's foreign language

I just feel like people either loved it or hated it Yeah, why not Yeah That one counts On the Japanese side I would mention some of these Mothra The

Destroy all monsters The animations By Studio Ghibli Oh well what's his name Miyazaki Is that his name Yeah That's one of them

Yeah Anyways Spirited Away Spirited Away Good stuff Those are really great. Good stuff. You should try those on the kids because our guys like them.

Am I mangling the name? Gilbert, Maurice has one more for you. Who does Gilbert believe tells the definitive version of the aristocrats beside himself, of course? Adjust me. Okay. Okay. David Baggett Or Baggett Have you guys

Ever talked about The film The Littlest Fugitive I think he means The Little Fugitive Oh my god Yes we certainly have Yes

We have On this very show We went into detail That's a terrific movie We did a mini episode About it And it influenced The Truffaut

And Scorsese And many other people Yeah Yeah Terrific movie What is it The Little The Little Fugitive It's a movie And it influenced Truffaut. And Scorsese and many other people. Yeah. Yeah. Terrific movie. What is it? The Little?

The Little Fugitive. Wow. It's a movie. It's made on a shoestring budget about a little boy in Coney Island. Oh, that's great. It's really hard to describe without ruining it. When was it made? When was it made?

In the 60s or the 50s? I would think it was the 60s. I don't want to say it was the 50s. I want to say the late 50s. Yeah. That sounds great. And it's like he's supporting himself on the beach bike. He keeps finding bottles and turning them.

But also, what was so cool about it was I think it was filmed without any sound, and then they added the sound after the movie was done. I believe that's true. It was made by, do you know Andy Engel from Carolines? You know Andy, don't you, Deb? It was Marty Eng, do you know Andy Engle from Carolines? You know Andy, don't you, Dad? It was Marty Engle's, Marty Engle.

Not Marty Engle. No, no. Andy Engle's parents. Right. Yeah. But what was the father's name? Oh, God. Yeah, Morris.

Morris Engle. Morris Engle and Ruth Orkin. And Ruth Orkin, right. Yeah, yeah. Well, everybody should know Ruth Orkin's work. She was a very famous photographer. It was made by Marty Engle's. And it's time off from I'm Dick andkin's work. She was a very famous photographer. It was made by Marty Ingalls

in his time off from Antiquancy Spencer. What a versatile talent. Marty Ingalls could make The Little Fugitive and influence Francois Truffaut and the new wave.

Yeah. Richie Andrusco would make for a mini episode. I guess the little boy is still with us. Oh, my God. Yeah. How about that? Wow. Ryan, yes, we have.

The answer to the question is we have discussed it at length. If you're on Stitcher, you can find a mini episode where Gilbert waxed nostalgic about that one. I wax every night wax on and wax off ryan matney what does gilbert gottfried consider to be lon chaney jr's greatest horror performance oh he's greatest horror well i'll just stick with the wolfman okay greatest horror okay that's a. That's a safe answer. And let's see what else I have here from these listeners society people. Greatest performance of Mice and Men.

Oh, yeah. He wrote that in parentheses. Jeff Mouse, M-A-U-S. We know Jeff. Can Gilbert tell the story of a young Joe Piscopo getting stomped by a mobster after making fun of his mom? Yes. Yes, yes. Piscopo was on stage at Catch a Rising Star, and he's like playing off the audience,

and he says, hey, and what do you do, sir? What are you, a hitman for the mob? Oh, God. It turns out the guy, a lucky guess. Nice work. Not so lucky. Guy chased after Piscopo and started beating, broke his nose. Unbelievable.

And then in the hospital, Rick Newman's there, and he's shaking his head, and he goes, I can't believe he did that. I can't believe Johnny Rip would do a thing like that. Rick knew him. Yeah. A nice work. Yeah. It's like saying, I can't believe Tony the Hook would do something like that.

Tony the Hook. Yeah. When I was a kid, my father was shamed into telling my sister and I bedtime stories, but he wouldn't read an actual bedtime story. It was too much to bother him to read Shel Silverstein. So he would tell us about guys in the neighborhood that he grew up in. Oh, jeez. So our bedtime stories were stories about guys named Vinnie Potts and Pants

and Louis the Louse. I think I told this on the show. A guy named Handsome Pills. They named this guy Handsome Pills because he walked into a restaurant and a bunch of my father's friends were sitting around and one guy looked at him and said, look at this guy. He looks like he just swallowed a whole bottle of Handsome Pills. And that became his name.

So he would sit down and tell us, did I ever tell you guys the story of Vinnie Pots and Pans? No, Dad, you didn't. So I laugh at that scene in Goodfellas when theyots and Pans? No, Dad, you didn't. So I laugh at that scene in Goodfellas when they all have the nickname. Oh, yes. Jimmy Two Times. Yeah, I gotta go out and get the papers. Get the papers. PDIs.

Eric Foreman. Not that Eric Foreman. Hey, Gilbert, I think Verterosa had this first. I just heard there was another earthquake in Japan today. 6.8 magnitude. There may be tsunamis. James Robbins, would Frank ever play hooky one podcast just to force Gilbert to ask more than one question every 10 minutes?

He's a deep thinker. They're roasting you. We will return to Gilbert Gottfried's amazing colossal podcast after this. Baseball is finally back. Get in on Major League action and swing for the fences with BetMGM, the king of sportsbooks. Log in or sign up to play along as BetMGM brings the real-time action. Embrace a season's worth of swings with BetMGM, the king of sportsbooks. Log in or sign up to play along as BetMGM brings the real-time action. Embrace a season's worth of swings with BetMGM,

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Sean Mason, has any guest ever reneged on appearing on the show after the interview was recorded? In other words, did his or her people call later and say thanks but no thanks oh yeah dara's nodding yeah i'm liking dara am i allowed to say oh and also also um from the love boat oh that you know yeah yeah should i beep these out later just for fun so we'll be super mysterious? We're going to bleep them out and create another mystery. There was also... Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Okay, yes. In fact, it has happened. In fact, there have been more people refusing to have their interview played than agreeing to it. Usually it's Gilbert who calls the next day and says, I want no part of that. Usually it's the estate of the deceased guest

making the request. The estate of the deceased. Yeah, Frank's going to bleep those out, the ones that Dara just mentioned. But yes, I guess it has happened. Micah Holmquist. I love these names. Micah Holmquist.

See, that's a Japanese guy. Yeah, that's a guy who was in a lot of Kurosawa pictures. He wants to know, does Gilbert consider his comedy to be Jewish comedy? No, it always had a strong Irish Catholic feel to it. I don't know much. Okay, okay. Let's see. Let's see.

Oh, did I use up this whole page? Barley Marie, our podcast guests compensated for their appearances. Lavishly. Of course. Oh, yes, yes. Oh, the money we throw around. Martin paints. Giant thing of gummy bears out in the kitchen.

That's not nothing. Hoffman's beverages. We pay them in coffee. And what else is out there? There's kombucha. Now and laters. There are many packs of cookies out there. About a month old.

You're a guest. You take as many as you want. Corey Caldwell. This might have been mentioned on the show before, but are you fans of old Warner Brothers gangster pictures? Oh, of course. And if so, what are your favorites? Oh, geez. You like Little Caesar.

Oh, yeah. Pizza, pizza. Little Caesar. That's a good one. Oh, Roaring Twenties. Roaring Twenties, Love, Bogart and Cagney. Yeah. White Heat made by Warner Brothers?

White Heat, yeah. That's a later, latter day Cagney. Top of the world, mom. Great one, great one. latter-day Cagney. Top of the world, Ma. Great one, great one. Latter-day Cagney. Oh, there's so many good ones. Dead End? Yes.

There's so many good ones. Angels with Dirty Faces. So, so many. We could go on. Let's see. Matt Butler. Will Dara and the kids ever appear on the show? Well, I believe Dara has appeared on the show numerous times.

I remember it being brought up before. I think she tries to protect the children. They're on the sing-along if you really listen. They're on the live episode. I think I'd like to do one where I bring on Bing Crosby's family. Any of them left?

I wonder. You want to bring them on and hit them with a belt? Yes! of them left? I wonder. And beat them? You want to bring them on and hit them with a belt? Yeah, yes! Did any of Cosby's kids, Bing Cosby,

Bing Cosby, Hey, I'm doing a movie with Bob Hope. It's what the kids call a mashup. Nice, Gil. What was the question? Did any of Bing Crosby's kids kill themselves?

Maybe. That sounds right. Yeah, sounds. If not, they should have. Very nice. I think two of the Crosby kids killed themselves. I think Mushmouth locked himself in his garage and turned on his Pinto. Let's see. Eric Deutsch.

One of them pulled a turtleneck over there. That was him. I love that Paul's still looking up something from 15 minutes ago. He's looking up something from 15 years ago. Two shows ago. What do you got, Paul? I don't know. I'm up something from 15 minutes ago. He's looking up something from 15 years ago. Two shows ago. What do you got, Paul? I don't know. I'm looking at it.

Eric Deutsch, would Gilbert... Lindsay Crosby suicide. There you go, Gil. Excellent. The youngest son of Bing Crosby. Well, I'm happy about that. Gilbert casting a darkness over the show. Usually I'm the one who brings it down.

You are. Eric Deutsch, would Gilbert consider hosting a rebooted Up All Night? Any place they wave a check in my face. He'd pretty much consider a reboot of the Red

Shoes. Somebody offered it to him. And would he sing on the show the song from my favorite Up All Night episode, Palms Across the Planet? Does that mean anything to you? Wow, I don't remember that one. Okay, we'll have to do some deep research and come back

to that one. Palms Across the Planet. Palms Across the Planet. It's like Islands in the Stream. Yeah. Alex Knight with a K. If you could put a bunch of your podcast guests in a hypothetical movie where they were all

in their primes, when they were all in their primes, what would be the plot and who would be some of the featured people in it? They already made it. It's called Skidoo.

Yeah, that's pretty much it. Skidoo. How about that? Danny Fontenot. Yeah, we've heard a little bit about your long writing career, Frank, but not a lot about your aspirations growing up. Well, my aspiration was to work with Gilbert Gottfried. Yes.

Even when I was six, I had no idea who he was. Sitting on Santa Claus's lap. It's every young kid's aspiration. It's every child's dream. Dan Fisher says, Frank, how much time do you generally devote to preparing for a guest? You often mention a movie you rewatched featuring the guest as this deep research. Consume your every waking hour. Ask my wife.

She will tell you. Quite a bit. Bear Toffoli.. Bear Toffoli or Bear Toffoli T-O-F-F-O-L-I Is there any movie you or Gilbert has ever walked out of?

Oh, I'm sure that. There's been some real stinkers. Yeah. I think Ford Fairlane. Ah, yes! Back by Midnight The new Aladdin movie Funky Monkey To answer Dan Fisher

I usually put in about 12 to 15 Or 20 hours Somewhere, give or take The guest, Charlie Crist Or Christ, any films that Gilbert Discovered by hosting USA Up all night? Did you make any miraculous discoveries? No, I don't think I ever discovered

one there. Okay, Dalen Roarig or Roarig. Yeah, Roarig. This is for the entire gang of usual idiots. Paul, feel free to chime in. What is your favorite trashy movie? Trashy movie? You have one? I don't know. I'm thinking. What about you? Body Double. Yeah, Body Double. That was just such a complete... The De Palma movie with... Is it Melanie Griffith? Yes. Melanie Griffith and...

Craig Watson. Oh, and Deborah Sheldon. Very good. Yeah. Yeah. Mine would be Hardcore, a Paul Schrader movie with George C. Scott. Do you know it? Oh, yes. How about that?

It's about- That's my daughter! That's the one. It's sort of a sleazy update of Ford's The Searchers. Yeah. He's looking for his daughter who was kidnapped and put in porn. Yeah, Peter Boyle's good in that. From Lou Ramey, would Gilbert consider doing a reboot of Columbo?

He would be a great quirky detective. Yeah. Excuse me, ma'am. I'm sorry. Excuse me, ma'am. I'm sorry. I just said, you know, you have a question that's bugging you the whole time. I've said this for years, though.

If Gilbert was just himself as like a mobster, just a quiet guy that spoke quietly with a New York accent. You think he'd be terrifying? He would be the most fucking terrifying character. Scorsese should book you for that. Did you ever see a movie called Mad Dog and Glory? No, I've heard of it. With Bill Murray as a gangster. Oh, yes.

Yeah. But that would be great. It's a comic as gangster. Somebody write that. Okay. Paul, get on it. Joe Atema, or Atema, Joe Atema Or Atema Or Atema I just want to mention

My proudest moment At the time As a soon to be stepfather We were at the Denver Comic Con In 2017 When Kyle My 16 year old stepson

Picked up a Funko Pop Figure Of the 1966 Joker Showed it to me And asked Does this come with Little orange wedges

Wow Look at this podcast Bringing families together I'm sure 1666 Joker showed it to me and asked, does this come with little orange wedges? Wow. Look at this podcast bringing families together. I'm calling social services. Beautiful. I'm choked up. I am. I am too.

Beverly Carr, here's my question. And then the kid picked up a glass coffee table. As children will do. And Chang Danny boy. Love to pick up glass coffee tables. Very popular among the teens. Beverly Carr. Frank, here's my question.

What the hell will Gilbert do when all hotels stop stocking mini soaps, lotions, conditioners, and shampoos? Yeah, the world is coming to an end A number of prominent therapists in New York Have offered their services Oh, it's horrible He's going to have to go on meds It's horrible Will Gilbert continue to hoard them

Or will he sell them on the black market? Oh, that would be something The price is going to go way up As soon as you can't get them anymore It could bring back bootlegging. Luis Fernando Linares. Frank, I know this is going to sound like a Casey Kasem dedication, but bear with me. Three years ago, my parents died within a month.

My dad from dementia. My mom found out she had pancreatic cancer. Wow, that is unfortunate. Sad. As I was dealing with the unpleasantries, I listened to the podcast to lighten things up, and I heard Gilbert tell his great joke with that punchline, Thank God I don't have cancer. Ah, yes.

That's on your dirty joke. I laugh very hard, and to this day, I thank Gilbert for his amazing ability to always find humor in things, no matter how tough they get. Isn't that nice? Wow. That is beautiful. Up next, girls just want to have fun from Cindy Lauper. Yes. Fucking ponderous. I think

Gilbert can say Luis and my last name is pronounced Linares and I know he will mangle it beautifully. I think, Frank, you have more fun with the names than the actual questions. I have a lot of fun with the names. That was a nice one. What a fun with the names. That was a nice one. What a sweet thing to write. That was a nice one.

Thank you, Louis. He's a big fan of the podcast. I read him on Facebook, and we're very sorry about your losses. Gregory C. Ward. Here you go, Frank. Gilbert, how hard did you laugh when you heard of the failure of the new Aladdin? I laughed heartily myself. There was nodding from the other room.

I believe we call this schadenfreude. Are you familiar with that word? But I can't help but think if they had put Gilbert's voice in there, there would have been a pretty big percentage of people just for the nostalgia that would have turned up. I haven't gone to see it. They made a big mistake.

Really silly. Let's see, let's see, let's see. Brian Laverty, was there anything Gilbert enjoyed about his time on SNL? How was the craft services? Even they're not that good. Yeah. Yeah. Nothing at all?

Nothing. Really? Nothing. Yeah, it was pretty bad. What about when you picked up that letter from the girl that said I'm sorry. Oh my god, yes. I'm sorry you're being fired. Let's see, two more

if I have... Rich Marenberg, for all you guys, what is your opinion of porn parodies of famous movies and TV shows like Pulp Friction and Shaving Ryan's Privates. That's very clever. I must say.

I think Romancing the Bone was always my favorite. Oh, Romancing the Bone's a great one. There was one. Yeah. I'm forgetting my favorites. And I didn't see it, but I saw the cover it it was a black guy and a white girl oh no and the name of the movie was amos and candy do you remember the snL sketch from years ago?

I want to say, I don't think Harvey Keitel was the guest, but they're in a pitch room trying to come up with porn titles. Oh, that's with, what's his name? Tall guy. Christopher Walken. No, with the nose. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Brogan. Huh? Was it Liam Neeson? No, with the nose. Yeah, yeah, yeah. The Brogan.

Huh? Was it Liam Neeson? No, no, no. The guy who was in the movie, the Jew who was hiding out all during the war. Oh, Adrian Brody. Adrian Brody. Oh, was he in that? Yeah. Adrian Brody.

Because there was that movie out, The Pianist. Right. I can't believe how I get from these clues. Yeah. The guy with the big nose who was fighting out during the war. They're coming up with porn titles for every. Yeah, Cyrano just came up in the previous. For every other movie, they're coming up with a porn title.

Like, what about this one, The Pianist? Anybody, anything? Yeah, that's the one that stops them. That's the punchline. That's funny. Here's, let's see. I think this is, these are the last two. Gilbert, I loved you as Hitler in Jeff Ross's historical roasts.

I agree with Jeff when he says we have to laugh through the pain, and also with Gilbert when he says the roast was extremely offensive, yet respectful at the same time. Yes, it really was. Has Gilbert run into any fans at shows taking umbrage of his Holocaust humor. They take umbrage with me over everything. Both of them didn't have a problem.

Yeah, no, that was a fun roast to do. And last, this one is catnip to you, Gilbert, from Joe Santani. In The Mummy, was Princess Ankesenamon Princess Ankesenamon worth going through all the trouble of stealing the scroll of Toth, resurrecting and getting caught, and being sentenced to the nameless death? Sure, she was cute, but there had to be at least another girl in Cairo who was a decent lay.

What would Gilbert do? Yeah. It's funny. That was in the mummy. They kept changing the names. Yeah. Like in the original, he was Imhotep.

I remember that one. And then in the Chaney ones, he was Karras. Yeah. Why? So, yeah. Did you see the Tom Cruise one?

The Tom Cruise mummy? Did you, did you sit through that one? No. I didn't sit through that one. Yeah. Okay. I lied.

Last question. Uh, from Eric Gilbert. Who is sexier, Una O'Connor or Maria Uspenskaya? No one can make that call. Yeah, yeah. That's just a two-disc call. It's like Raquel Welch or Juliette Browse.

It's come up so many times. These were great questions. What did you think, Paulie? They were good. Those were fun. Thank you, fans. Thank you, Listener Society. You had your moment, and we will come back to you. And we'll do Patreon next time. What do you think? Well, I think... What would Maria

Uspenskaya say? The way you walk is thorny. Through no fault of your own. But as the rain enters the soil, the river enters the sea. So tears go on to a protestant end. How does he do it?

How does he do it? Thank you, Paulie. This has been Gilbert and Frank's amazing colossal obsessions. If you want to know about Papillon Sousou Or Long Chaney Junior It's something we're used to Colossal obsessions These things that we've studied

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