Gilbert Gottfried's Amazing Colossal Podcast - Mini #234: Stump the Hosts (Music Version) Part 2 with Kevin Dougherty and Darryl Mayeski

Episode Date: September 19, 2019

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Partner Sun Life. The world is yours to create. Here we go boys. Echo thinks it's presenting partners sun life. The world is yours to create. Frank's Colossal Obsessions! Gilbert and Frank's Colossal Obsessions! Gilbert and Frank's Colossal Obsessions! Hi, this is Gilbert Gottfried, and I'm here with Frank Santopadre, and this is Gilbert and Frank's amazing Colossal Obsessions with the return of Kevin Dougherty and Daryl Mayeski. What a pro.

Yes. And who's the owner and publisher of Scream Magazine. Yes. That's with two E's. The wonderful Scream Magazine. Just to bring you guys up to speed, in case you didn't listen to last week's show, Kevin, who's a longtime friend of the show, and Daryl, the wonderful publisher of Scream Magazine, decided to come here and play a little Golden Throats with us and quiz us.

What would you call it? Podcast specific? Podcast specific and or related and or adjacent. Yes. golden throats with us and quiz us uh what would you call it uh podcast specific podcast specific and or related and or adjacent yes and all very upsetting yes gilbert gilbert is still in shock we just wrapped the last episode yes gilbert has not recovered and we were running long and there's too much uh wonderful stuff here so we decided to do a part two this is part two we're gonna let these guys take it from here. Have we hit bottom yet? That's what we're trying to figure out.

Because some of these are almost serviceable. Some of these people we were talking about. Burt Ward, not much of a singer. But that was like the most novelty of novelty records. You knew what it was. We don't want to recap too much in case they listen out of order. But if you're listening out of sequence, go back and listen to part one. Because there's some

real gems in there and these guys did hard work. Meanwhile, same Gilbert Times, same Gilbert Chowns. The next song is from Chissa, C-H-I-S-A Records

in 1967. It's a song called November Nights, number 12. It's a pretty serviceable song. This is a guy who's been on the podcast.

I'll get this one. Yeah, it's a pretty serviceable song. This is a guy who's been on the podcast. I'll get this one. Yeah, it's a... I think it's his only record ever. Let me hear his voice. Hard. Very fond of him. I'll remember a November night When the dawn on your doorway This guy's not a musician?

No, but he comes from a famous family of... Actors. Actors. I don't want to be so on the nose. Well, we've had a lot of guests who've come from famous families of actors. Kind of a hippie icon. Did I mention this is written by Graham Parsons of The Birds?

No, I dig the song. Is it not? Peter Fonda. Bingo! Ah! Bingo, Gilbert! Ah! Nice!

Wow! This is a song written by Graham Parsons. I think Peter Fonda was the first guy to record it. And the Graham Parsons version wasn't released until some album of demos of his. What's it called? It's called November Nights. I think it's on one of those Rhino boxes that's like the San Francisco Nuggets. Oh, yes, yes, yes.

It's on San Francisco. Let me just wash up from pulling that out of my ass. Now I'm sorry I high-fived you. That is impressive. That's a good double play with Leslie Gore's California Nights, which is a song I love. That actually isn't bad. No, and it's a great song.

Obviously, if Grant Parsons in it was like, he had some pushback then, but he, you know. When you said singer from an acting, actor from a family, I was going to go to the Carradines, but then I realized

Keith Carradine had an actual recording career. Yes, yes. He had a top 10 hit with I'm Easy. Won a Grammy. Yes. And he's done the podcast, right?

Keith Carradine? He has been here. Yes, he does. Yes, when we were at Nutmeg. What do we got next? Next 13, number 13. That was impressive. I think, wait a minute,

David Carradine also did an album as Woody Guthrie. He did. The Bound for Glory. Yeah, the soundtrack. Good movie. But when you guys pull out the hits of Joyce Van Patten,

I'm walking out of here. Yes. That's when I leave. Okay, this is a Beatles cover. Oh. From the album. And this person's been a guest on the show.

Yeah. Oh, I'm so excited. He's a... No hints. No hints. Okay. Until I hear it. That's Lon Chaney Sr.

as the Hunchback of Notre Dame. That's good. That's good. Wednesday morning. as the hunchback of Notre Dame. That's the intro. I know this. He's a better singer than this. He was sitting right in that chair a couple of months ago. He's a bit of a showbiz family.

Yeah, he is. And he's... I know about this record. Gilbert, I'll give you a hint. He has an Oscar. Yes, yes. Holy fuck! How's that for a hint?

This is that era when they were doing these really cheeseball beetle covers and would do them on variety shows. Yes. And you'd get Kate Smith and Tony Randall doing Sgt. Pepper. You talk to him about his Oscar. His father was a recording artist. His father was a recording artist that you have great

affection for. Oh, jeez. Now, if you win this and you get this right, we'll give you the pickle in the window. Okay, alright. Oh, my, wait. This is, yeah, Joel Gray?

Yes, it is Joel Gray. 1969. From the album Black Sheep Boy. A Tim Harden song. And he re-released this recently in the original Yiddish. Is that true? Pretty great. You guys could come back and just do obscure Beatle covers.

Oh, there's like we mentioned. We'll do a whole show of those. Didn't we mention there's a whole, Rhino did a whole. We'll do a whole, we'll do a future show of those. Yeah, they did a Butchering the Beatles. Butchering the Beatles.

Yeah. Kelly Savalas. We're trying to remember if Drew did the cover for that. He might have. That was great. I knew about that one. I almost had to disqualify myself.

There's also a really, really weird, violent Joel Grey Christmas song about tying up Santa and beating him. Do you know this? It's a weird S&M. Chances are I have it. You say violent. I say erotic. I mean, you know.

All righty. That was great. A Jewish guy doing a violent Christmas song. I know that's kind of problematic on some levels yeah we did it I did a mini episode about obscure

I tried to stump him with obscure Christmas I mean Easter I could get we pulled out this obscure Danny Thomas Christmas song the Joel Grey there were a bunch

that was great number 14 this is a really ratty copy of the song this is a song from a podcast guest that's been referenced several times in the show

I like how Tom's through the glass doing reading along. We know the song. Ah ha! Come on, Vegas, you can do it with me. I know who this is. Gilbert has to

know this. It's so strange in your neighborhood. Who you gonna call? Those know who this is. Gilbert has to know this. Come on, Gil. It's practically from your act. I think it is from your act. It's not Tony Orlando. It's Tony Orlando. This is the song that

he sung with that kid who I, you know, where it was, it's we got to get a copy of it. Well, you got one. Be careful what you wish for. But this. Where did you get this? I think this was on YouTube.

The 1984 MDA Telethon. Yeah, but he sang it with a kid. Yes. And it was like, there's something wrong in the neighborhood. Who are you going to call? Hey, yeah, yeah. Yeah. It's something bad

and ain't no good. Who are you going to call? This is the part of the week where I call my wife into the room and say, should I cut this? Yeah. And then I call Dara and I say Dara, we have a saving Gilbert from himself emergency. The alarm just went off.

Let's have a moment of silence for either a pause so Frank can cut or for Gilbert's career. Oh, it's fine. Yeah. It's fine. But he's done enough damage to himself. I'm going to skip this next one. This next one's complicated. This is another thing we found on YouTube, so it's really crappy quality.

But this is a dedication to the Gilbert Gottfried Amazing Colossal Podcast Listener Society. Do you know what this is about? Roll 15. This is from German television circa 1993. It's two television soap opera stars. This was in Schindler's Lich. The subject of this, the singer of this song has been the subject of much speculation

on the Listener Society group and we'll just leave it at that. Uh oh. We gotta leave that one alone. That's every one of them.

Two of the stars of Dynasty I gotcha. 1993 German television show. So the people who know know now

and we can move on. It's an inside joke that we'll explain to Gilbert after the podcast that we'll explain to Gilbert after the podcast. We'll explain it to him later. After our lawyers get back to us. Yeah.

What's number 16? All right, number 16. Wait, wait. We're protecting the innocent. We'll tell you later. We'll tell you later. Okay. Our next track is by an artist.

Nicely done, though. Who, kind of like Jackie Gleason, had several major albums that were instrumental, but through his name on there. But he did a lot of spoken word. He also did a lot of H.P. Lovecraft spoken word stuff. Love it already. He has a lot of weird Richard Harris interjections without really hitting a melody. He has a lot of weird kind of Richard Harris kind of interjections without really hitting a melody. Draw up my friends for the ride of your last time. And he's been a guest.

It's free to you all. I've no tickets to sell. He's our only guest that we know of to have had dinner with Robert Mueller. Come out in the sunlight and see what you're missing. Recently. Recently. Strange. Yeah, I know what it is. I knew it without the hint. He's very British.

He had a recording career. Yeah, he had a lot of records. He's about 85 now, right? Yeah, he's in his 80s. Most of the records he did not sing on. No, he did a lot, whatever this is. I think he was also a conductor for the big TNT show. He was a conductor for the big TNT show.

If you were listening to that episode with him, yeah, he's very proud of that. And this is written by Jim Dale. Wow. Yeah. And I didn't think it was the same Jim Dale. I thought it was just... Gilbert, can you get this? Gilbert's still stumped. Can you get this or do you...

If you don't get it, you'll have to say uncle. Okay, uncle. What does uncle stand for? What is the word? United Nations Command for Law Enforcement. Something like that. Okay, so who's the singer? Is this a man from that?

I'll give you a clue. It wasn't Robert Vaughn. Oh, my God. That guy with the big head from Outer Limits. Oh, the Outer Limits. He forgot his name. Michael Callum. Is he Ilya Kuryakin?

Yeah. Okay. Yeah, David McCallum. David McCallum. Here's the problem. Gilbert has no memory of any of the guests that have been on this show. But he remembers man from Uncle. Yeah.

And the Outer Limits. If it has to do with this podcast, I don't know it. Yeah. If I told him Bishop Tutu had been on the podcast, he would buy it. Number 17. This is another thing. We tried to find a better copy of this. This is a guy who's been on the podcast like 8 billion times.

Anytime you're on a roll. This is a live performance from a television show. Yes. I know this. He's a great singer. He is. Great recording. The guy who wrote it's been

on I've Got a Secret. Did you get this off of the Rosie O'Donnell clip on YouTube? No, it's from the award show. The Grammy, the Tony Awards. Tony Awards.

Nothing, Gilbert? It's not Richard Kind. It's not Richard Kind. But it could be. Let him hear it. It sounds like an old recording, but it's pretty recent. Yeah. It's not Robert Preston.

Well, it's not. What's his name? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, he's sort of doing a Robert Preston homage. Because when I saw, because when I heard it was an imitation, then I knew. He had to audition for Meredith Wilson's Widow. Really? To get the part. And he said, fuck it, I'm going to...

If anybody's out there, you want to see what he does, well, go look it up on the YouTube from the Tony Awards. Craig Bjerko doing... That's a very good imitation. You know, there's also a clip of him doing Trouble on some PBS special. Really? Yeah, yeah, yeah. He's a very good imitation. You know, there's also, there's a clip of him doing trouble on some PBS special. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

That was, he's so fucking good. He's so good. His facial expressions are even as good as his singing. He was born to play that part. How do you do the music, man? After Robert,

I don't even know what, I can name four other things. Robert Preston is, but I can't imagine anybody doing. They said Forrest Tucker did it at the risk of Gilbert jumping. Forrest Tucker did a... Forrest Tucker? At the risk of Gilbert jumping out. Oh, jeez. They said Forrest Tucker did a very good music man. And the rest of the cast

stood on his stick. And the 76 trombones, the 76, referred to inches. You know, two years ago we went to Warner Brothers and that's probably one of the only

recognizable things on the lot is the town square from the 76th. That's right. Oh, the gazebo. Yes, it's still all there. 76-inch bone in the big parade. Yeah, yeah. Bjerko is a great talent.

God bless him. And we love him, and he's a friend of this show. He just got us Beverly D'Angelo, one of our best guests. Yes, she was great. Yeah. Okay, our next song. We love you, Craig, if you're listening to this. We will return to Gilbert

Gottfried's amazing, colossal podcast after this. Baseball is finally back. Get in on Major League action and swing for the fences with BetMGM, the king of sportsbooks. Log in or sign up to play along as BetMGM brings the real-time action. Embrace a season's worth of swings with BetMGM,

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TD Insurance advisor to learn more. Number 19. This next song is from somebody who you definitely know, if you saw her, but maybe not heard her. Go ahead. The cover song. 1967.

What's the name of the song? Bend It. Yeah, that is appropriate. Bend it. Show me. You can move and do the dance. That's really in the groove. And bend it.

1967. She was one of the hottest things on television. Literally. I don't know why she hasn't been on the podcast. She's still around. She's still out there. 1967, she was one of the hottest things on television. Literally. I don't know why she hasn't been on the podcast. She's still around. She's still out there. She should be on the podcast.

Yes. Let me hear her voice. Is it Barbara Eden? It is Barbara Eden. Do you know? I was about to say that one. Shit. This is a cover of the song by Dave D. Dozie Beaky McIntitch.

What? Who also do, what's the song from the Quentin Tarantino movie? They do a song that sounds just like this. Death Proof? Yeah, but there's a song. They did another song. They had another hit. They're a British group.

And the album, it's her in full genie regalia on the cover of the album. We reached out to Barbara Eden. Oh, really? We didn't have a lot of success. But we could try again. I think she's one of those guests that kind of sticks to the script.

Yeah. To protect the legacy of the series. She's got the same kind of sound bite over and over again that you hear. Yeah, I mean, you just, you know,

she had a much bigger career than that series, obviously. Oh, yeah. Harper Valley PTA and much more in the Disney stuff. She had a big career.

Okay, this next... By the way, Paul just called in. He's got some information about Burt Ward from the last episode. Oh, great. Fantastic.

Fantastic. Let me patch him episode. Oh, great. Paul, fantastic. Fantastic. Let me patch him through. Okay, this next track is one of my all-time favorite novelty celebrity songs. This is 21. I'll give you a clue. This is track 21. He gave Marlon Brando an offer he could not refuse.

Let's hear it. Richard Pryor. I don't know how distinguishable this is. This is a wacky song. I know. I know who you're referring to. Oh. You can see the look on Gilbert's face. Well, I definitely recognize the voice.

Do you? Yeah, I know. Well, Daryl gave it to me with his clue. It's from 1953. Let me guess. It's about giving Gilbert a clue. It'll help him. Marla Brando's a pretty big clue.

What did Brando give to Pryor? A sweet Polly? If you were... Let me see. You should... If you were in a contest to guess this song, Gilbert, you might be considered an underdog. Oh, my God. Wally Cox.

Ding, ding, ding. Ding, ding, ding. Oh, jeez. I never heard that in my life. I don't know. Yeah, I think... The brand of... On RCA Records. Yeah.

A novelty album of yodeling? I don't think it was an album. It was a 45. Wally Cox does the hits of Slim Whitman? He does. It does sound like Slim. That was the B side. I don't remember what the A side was.

The B side. Oh, well, I was very upsetting. Wally Cox yodels? He's going to scream. He's going to wake up screaming in the night and call me. These are nightmares. Speaking of nightmares. Oh, boy. And I. These are nightmares. Well, speaking of nightmares. Oh, boy.

And I'm good with nightmares. You gave him a segue. Publishing a horror magazine. Yes. This next track is probably one of the creepiest novelty records by a celebrity. I love it. It goes right up there with Blood Rocks D.O.A., if you remember that song. But this guy's been on the show.

Yes. He was a DJ at one point, I believe. you remember that song. But this guy's been on the show. Yes. He was a DJ at one point, I believe. Not too many clues. But this is creepy. The day will come when my body will lie upon a white sheet. Yeah, I got it. Really? Yeah, this was a big hit.

Really? Located in a hospital. Well, they had a big hit. Deck of cards. Yes, deck of cards, yes. This isn't that old. This is like 1982. I get them from the voices.

He's got a very distinctive voice. He didn't sound like this on the podcast. And that's for all intents and purposes. My life has stopped. When that happens, I'm imagining all of the listeners screaming as they wait for Gilbert. I know. I'm imagining all of the listeners screaming as they wait for Gilbert.

I know. Gilbert, you want us to... This isn't to pay, is it? No. You want us to tell you, or you want to press your luck? He was a game show host at one point, I guess? I'd say he's known for being a game show host. Well, also, it's very well connected with Elvis in the early days. Not the one drama.

No. Love on the Callister, Chuck McCann. Wink Martin down! Ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding. I think that's it. I think we're out of songs. We're done. We have our theme song.

We have our theme song. No bonus tracks? No, the only one we got left was, what was the number? We'll have to save that for another show. Number 18. Number 18 is the, because we're both from Wilkes-Barre, Pennsylvania. So this is all we got. No add on this one.

This is a song. Do we have enough time? I hope we made the time. Sure, we got time. This is a song from a failed Broadway musical from 1963 called Kovarich, which is a musical, or it was a drama

in 1933. It was remade in 1937, and it was on Broadway with Vivian Leigh for 300 performances in 1963. And you want us to guess the singer? Here's another hint. It's the background music

at every amusement park everywhere in the world ever. And no one in Wilkes-Barre knows about this song. They did it on the Ed Sullivan show when, you know, Ed Sullivan used to get 40 million viewers.

Are we guessing the singers? You'll only guess one singer. You'll never guess it. She's never been on the show. She's dead. Oh, boy. We can talk about famous people from Wilkes-Barre, Pennsylvania. Let me hear both of them.

Let me hear the vocals. Easy. And any of these people famous in the vocals? The woman is very famous. One of the most revered movies of all time. She's the female lead. Well, let's see if we can hear her. Terminator 2? Wilkes-Barre, Pennsylvania.

Home of James Caron. Yeah, you're talking over the vocals, though. I can't hear her. Mostly dancing. Not primarily known as a singer I got a gift Vivian Leigh Did you say that when you introduced me? Yeah, I did

You didn't even get it Is it Janet Leigh or Vivian Leigh? Vivian Leigh Oh, it's labeled Janet Lee. I'm sorry. But also from Wilkes-Barre. Who's from Wilkes-Barre? Russell Johnson, the professor from Wilkes-Barre.

James Caron. Do you mean Tony Curtis's ex-wife? No, Vivian Lee. From Gone with the Wind. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Wow. Jack Palance was always around Wilkes-Barre. Jack Palance was...

Yeah, he wasn't from Wilkes-Barre. Jerry Orbach is from Wilkes-Barre. And James Caron. James Caron. And James Caron, a good friend of James Caron I met in L.A. said, yeah, don't't from Wilkes-Barre. Jerry Orbach is from Wilkes-Barre. And James Caron. James Caron. And James Caron, a good friend of James Caron I met in L.A. said, yeah, don't bring up Wilkes-Barre. If you ever made a, he didn't have a great time in Wilkes-Barre. He didn't come back to visit, you know. You know what?

I got to tell you something. Go ahead. James not only came back to visit, he was a guest with me at a Chiller Theater show. Really? And I saw him a few years ago because he had a family in 44 pa okay sweetest guy the best guy yeah he was a guest i got him some buster keaton stuff he put it in the academy and uh we interviewed him and scream great interview yeah he used to call me and we'd yap for a lovely guy he and g guy. He and Gilbert got on the phone for hours.

Yeah, we used to talk and he'd always go, wherever I called him or he called me, he'd always go, hello, my boy. And he was proud of returning of the living dead, wasn't he? He was actually proud of Wilkes-Barre. Really? Whenever I would see him. But, yeah.

And he loved Return of the Living Dead. That's great stuff. And he used to say to me, tell your wife she has all my sympathy. So, tell us about Scream Magazine. Daryl, what year are you in now? Oh, dear God. I don't even know what year. Okay. Started in 92. Okay.

And we're a national publication. I believe that would be 27. Yeah, something like that. And we're in your Walmarts and Barnes & Noble. And you can pick us up directly online at Screamag, S-C-R-E-E-M-A-G.com. We do two covers for every issue. We do one for Newsstand and one for Direct Through Diamond Comics,

a limited edition. A wonderful magazine that should speak directly to fans of this show. Oh, yeah. And what's going on with the Drew documentary, sir? Soon.

Soon it's coming out. It'll be somewhere before the end of the year. We've got a distribution deal with Shout Factory and Stand Up Records via... And the title is still the premiere of the year we've got a distribution deal with Shout Factory and Stand Up Records via and the title is still the Vermeer of the Borscht Belt

it's that or Jew Dots one of the first things you see in the forthcoming trailer is before you see anything you see space let me paint a picture for you the music from 2001 and then you hear Jew Dots Jew Dots I was going to say why don't you bring Gilbert and his narrator the music from 2001, and then you hear, Jew dots! Jew dots!

I was going to say, why don't you bring Gilbert and his narrator? He makes the, he's the first thing I think, the first human I think that appears in the film. Well, I had a blast.

I'm so glad you guys came and did all that work. We're grateful to both of you. Thanks for having us. Thank you very much. Got a lot of stumpers. Gilbert's stunned. Yeah.

He's exhausted. Gilbert's not going to recover from this anytime soon. No, no. How about that Odd Couple cover? Oh, my God. Oh, you're so vain. Each one was more disturbing than the last. And thanks to Tom, who's here as well.

Guys, this was great. This is my new favorite mini episode out of 350 or however many of these things we've done. Gilbert, you want to mangle those names and take us home? Yes. Well, we've had on Kevin Dougherty and Daryl Mayeski. Look at that. Owner and publisher of Scream Magazine with two E's. Thank you.

And this has been Gilbert and Frank's amazing colossal obsession. He remembered your name, but not David McCallum's. Yes. I don't know what that means. That means a lot. Thank you, boys. Thank you, Frank. Thank you, Tom.

This was a joy. A pretty face can hide an evil mind Oh, careful what you say Don't give yourself away Odds are you won't live to see tomorrow Secret agent man Secret agent man They've given you a number and taken away your name. Then bleedin' in a Pompeii alley next day And if the wrong word slips

While kissin' persuasive lips Odds are you won't live to see tomorrow Secret agent man Secret agent man They've given you a number and taken away your name. Secret Agent Man, Secret Agent Man, they've given you a number and taken away your name. Only got a number Secret agent man They're taking away your name

Secret agent, secret agent He is a spy Secret agent Bleeding in a bomb bay alley Kissing every Sue and Sally Secret agent, secret agent man Secret agent, secret agent