Gilbert Gottfried's Amazing Colossal Podcast - Mini-Ep #55: Hello Down There and Comfort movies

Episode Date: April 14, 2016

Each week, comedian Gilbert Gottfried and comedy writer Frank Santopadre share their appreciation of lesser-known films, underrated TV shows and hopelessly obscure character actors -- discussing, dissecting and (occasionally) defending their handpicked guilty pleasures and buried treasures. This week: Carmen Miranda shows all! Roddy McDowall spoofs Phil Spector! And "The Bowery Boys Go to Outer Space"! This episode is sponsored by Parachute. Shop online at http://parachutehome.com/Gilbert for new sheets, duvets and other bedding essentials and receive $25 off your first order by using the offer code GILBERT. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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on Twitter, at RealGilbertACP, and on Instagram, Gilbert Podfried, P-O-D-F-R-I-E-D. You see, it's kind of a pun on the last name. Ah, never mind. Hi, this is Gilbert Gottfried, and I'm going to try to get the title right this time. Oh, why be different this time? Yeah. Why break from tradition? I'm here with my co-host, Frank Santopadre, and this is Gilbert and Frank's amazing, colossal obsession. It is. And I should tell the audience,

it'll be in a future date, but we interviewed the fine comedian and actress, Charlotte Ray, and I called her Caroline Ray. So I can't even get the guest names. Remember the time we were doing Greg Evigan and I slipped you the piece of paper? Yes. During an interview with Greg Evigan, I started to open my mouth.

And just like in school, Frank slipped me a little piece of paper that said Greg. I was pretty sure you were starting to form the word Glenn. Yes, I would have. I would have. And I wonder why some people don't want to do my show. I won't get their names right. Now that you brought it up, I think it's Evigan, not Evigan. Oh.

So there you go. So I can't bring, I don't know either of his names. Nah, it doesn't matter. Yeah. He was a good sport. Here's a new direction. Something strange and something, well, since we had Charlotte Rae, and I was doing research for Charlotte Rae,

and I found that she's in a movie that you and I have talked about on this show. Oh, yes. I think we talked about it with Ken Berry. Oh, yeah. Who is the rival in the film to Tony Randall. Or maybe we talked about it when you were talking about

The Seven Faces of Dr. Lau. Oh, yes. We were singing Tony Randall praises. Yeah, I recommended that one. this is a very offbeat movie uh from from the 60s from 1969 now this is where they have an apartment under the earth that's under the ocean under the ocean yes that's why uh richard dreyfus sings serenades a love song to a goldfish. See if it was under the earth. Then the goldfish

would be all dried up and fossilized. Maybe we mention this during the Dreyfuss tribute. I'd be very curious to see how many of our fans and listeners know this movie from Paramount in 1969 called Hello Down There.

And we've touched upon it. It is very, very strange. A few critics put it on their worst movies ever made list. Yeah, you know, it's a mixed bag. It's sort of like a Disney kind of a comedy, like something you'd expect to see Kurt Russell in. Yeah. Or Cesar Romero. But it's not a Disney.

But the... There's no oranges. They didn't have the money for citrus fruits alone. It would have tripled what the movie cost. The produce budget was... But it's an

oddball little film. I don't know where to begin to try to describe it. Tony Randall is a designer who designs a home, an underwater home. Have you seen this movie, Paul? Our researcher Paul Rayburn is here. To prove that people can live, it's a stunt to prove that people can live underwater. They're 90 feet below the ocean. He and Janet Leigh is his wife, and it's an experiment.

They're supposed to see how long they can live in this green onion, it's called. I don't know who came up with this premise. And they have two teenagers, and their teenagers are in a band. Of course. Stay with me. Well, it's believable so far. The band is led by a young Richard Dreyfuss in one of his first roles,

and you just referred to him singing a love song to a goldfish. And he's kind of like Hollywood's idea of a hippie. That's correct. Like, Hollywood never quite got... Like, they were the ones who were the druggies, like, you know, Dennis Hopper and people like that. They understood the culture, but Hollywood wanted to cash in,

and they never quite got what the hippie movement was. This is one of those movies, not quite as bad an offender as Skidoo. We were talking about how Skidoo had no ability to capture the spirit of Easy Rider and the spirit of the 60s. This was trying. But this was an Ivan Torres production, for Christ's sake. The guy that made Flipper. And Doctari.

Do you remember Doctari? Oh, my God, yes. And Gentle Ben. He did animal programs. And, you know, I should say, just in case I never told this story before, we referenced Cesar Romero. Now, in case

I don't know if I've ever told this story, I don't think so either, because the name is kind of unfamiliar. Would there be a story of yours that I haven't heard on the show? Well, maybe. Well, take a shot. But I'll say it for the first time.

Yeah. Cesar Romero was gay. The Latin lover. He was a Latin lover. Oh, I see. And he was a very tough, romantic Latin lover. And, oh, and he danced with Carmen Miranda. Sure did.

And there's still a photo, if you look it up, that you could see Carmen Miranda's pussy in the photo. Does one of the oranges in her hat have a dent in it? Yes. Was it peeled? Okay. It turns out, according to legend, Cesar Romero liked

to gather these young boy toys around him and pull down his pants and underwear, bend over, and have them fling orange wedges at his ass. You never heard that, Paul? Full force. Oh, really? That's interesting.

I'll have to make sure to tell it more often. Some argue that it was tangerine wedges. I say it was orange. Some argue that they pitched them underhanded and didn't quite fling them. I say it was orange. Some argue that they pitched them underhanded and didn't quite fling them. Some said they threw entire grapefruits. Till he was unconscious.

Some say it was Cesar de Nova. But it wasn't even Cesar Romero. It's Cesar Chavez and they threw lettuce. Some thought it was character actor Gino Conforti. Is he around? We got to get him. We got to get Gino Conforti. We got to. Gino Conforti, we have to get him.

He would pop up on shows like Three's Company. He had these really big eyes. He was always foreigners. Yes. He had these really big eyes. He was always foreigners. Yes. Any Spanish, Italian, any foreigner, he would wind up playing. Dara just wrote down on a pad, Gino Conforti.

I thought she was going to write, get back to hello down there and wrap the episode. So I'm going to go back to the- And please try to find that photo of where... The Carmen Miranda photo? Yeah, yeah. You can see her pussy in the photo. Oh, we talked about that with Mr. Skin. Oh, yes.

I hope it's called Dr. Skin. Dr. Skin. That was a movie with George Zucco and Lionel Atwell. It's a whole other thing. Dr. Skin. This is the trivia on Hello Down There. Okay. And it was directed by Jack Arnold,

the guy that directed The Creature from the Black Lagoon, and it came from outer space. So she was a legitimate tarantula. I liked... See, now, tarantula I brought up on the show before. With Joe Dante. Yes. And because I think a tarantula was once flinging orange wages.

Now cut that out! No, so I, tarantula was obviously trying to cash in on the more respected them about Giant Ant. That's right. But I find tarantula to be a much more enjoyable film. That's a very controversial position you're taking. I, I, they, they refer to acromegaly as acromegalia. Right. And they're trying to find a cure for acromegaly.

It sounds like a party that people with acromegaly are having. Let's go have a wild out and out acromegalia. Acromegalia. Yeehaw. Let's have an acromegalia. Yeehaw! Let's have an acromegalia. Acromegalia all the time. Yes. And instead, it starts... It makes a giant tarantula.

And Leo... G. Carroll. Leo G. Carroll's in it. And they're having an acromegalia. Well, I think in Italy, acromegalia is called acromegalia. Hey, Rusty. This episode is brought to you by FX's The Bear on Disney+. In Season 3, Carmi and his crew are aiming for the ultimate restaurant accolade,

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The Scorebet. Trusted sports content. Seamless sports betting. Download today. 19 plus. Ontario only. If you have questions or concerns about your gambling or the gambling of someone close to you, please go to ConnixOntario.ca So Gil. Yes? I know all your friends. Only your friends get to call you Gil. So I apologize. I want to talk about Parachute, the new online bedding brand from Venice, California. Okay, well, I won't stop you then. Well, did you know that great sleep starts with great sheets?

No, I didn't know this. Well, let me elucidate you. And Parachute has created a line of everyday bedding essentials from sheets to comforters to give you superior sleep. They delivered it to both of us. They did. I slept on mine. Yes, I liked it very much. That was very comfortable. Which ones did you get?

The white ones. Darren says you got the Satine. Yes. I got the Percal. Yes. And I was quite happy with it. Very comfortable. Yes, I remember eating Percal.

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They sent the sheets. My wife enjoyed opening the box. Came in a nice little bag. Did you get that little bag? The little envelope with the twine? Yes. The packaging was beautiful. They were very soft. I enjoyed the packaging.

What else did I? They come in three different styles. As I mentioned, the percal, the sateen, and the linen. Yeah. And they're made in Italy by my people. Ah, okay. Well, now I think we can leave that out of the commercial. Is that where you part company?

Yeah, yeah, I'm sorry. Now here's another cool thing about Parachute. Oh, okay. Because, you know, I had to burn my original sheets. Well, let's not talk about that. I'll talk about that when we're off the air. Okay. Yeah.

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You know what a sham is uh yes this this whole show and my marriage my yes my my marriage and uh yeah and my entire career here's another thing another question i wanted to ask you do you sleep with a top sheet um well i i don't want to talk about that because, you know, there's certain things. 40% of Americans actually sleep without a top sheet. I sleep with a top sheet. Okay, good to know. Shop online at parachutehome.com slash Gilbert for new sheets, duvets, and other bedding essentials.

new sheets, duvets, and other bedding essentials, and receive $25 off your first order by using offer code Gilbert. That's parachutehome.com slash Gilbert, and save by using offer code Gilbert. So Jack Arnold, who also directed The Incredible Shrinking Man,

a movie I know you know, directs this thing, Hello Down There, and it was produced by Ivan Torres. Now someone we're trying to get on this show is...

Um, um, um, um, um, um, um, um... Oh, Bird Eye Gordon. No, no, Bird Eye Gordon. Is he still around? He's 95 or something. We got to get him. Joe Dante says he doesn't talk much. Even if he just breathes on the phone.

Okay, we'll give it a shot. I got to get him. He, okay. The actor from Patty Duke. William Shallard. William Shallard is in The Incredible Shrinking Man. Indeed he is. He's on our list.

Yes. We're trying to track him down. So here's the B-plot. The family goes to live in the Green Hunters under the ocean. Tony Randall, he's married to Janet Leigh. Richard Dreyfuss leads the rock band. Roddy McDowell playing another eccentric record producer.

They love to come up with these Phil Spector type characters in the 60s. Here's the sound. Falls in love with the band. Says, I gotta have the band. I gotta sign them. I gotta book them on the Merv Griffin show. Merv Griffin's playing himself. He can't find the band because they're under the ocean. You following

me? Yes. And there's, and Charlotte Ray turns up as the maid. Oh, my God. Who brings the band's music to the, she's the messenger, and the music is sent from by Dolphin. Am I making any sense? Oh, jeez. Charlotte Ray is the messenger who takes the

tape to Roddy McDowell to play for her. And you weren't on acid when you were watching this. Yeah. Yeah. Barry, who wrote Sugar Sugar and Leader of the Pack, wrote the theme song. Hello down there. And with Sugar Sugar.

Yeah. That was going to be the Monkees next song. But they quit. That's right. And that became a monster. Because they couldn't get along with Don Kirshner. Yeah. That became a monster hit for the Archies.

Correct. Yeah. So that's the story of Hello Down There. Not to be confused with Hello There by Marty Allen. There's also a subplot with Lee Meredith from the producers. Remember Lee Meredith? Yes. Yes.

Be early stuck in blue. That's her with Lee Meredith from the producers. Remember Lee Meredith? Yes, yes. Be early, stalking blue. That's her with Roddy McDowell. We've got to get her on the show, too. She's around. There's a subplot with Jim Backus and Arnold Stang. Oh, the great Arnold Stang. And Harvey Lembeck turns up as a sonar man. Oh, my God.

Eric Von Zipper. So how about that cast? That's a great cast. So the point that I was trying to make, and it's a long way around the bend, is that I knew as a kid that Hello Down There wasn't a good movie. But it was a comfort movie. It was a movie that I liked to watch because it reminded me of, I don't know. You know what I'm talking about?

Certain movies you don't think they're any good, but you like having them on. And it's something that you return to time and time again for reasons unknown to you. And that's that kind of movie. Yeah, there's been a lot. Well, I remember growing up, movies were on TV all the time. And I loved it because I was such a movie freak. Now, one movie they would show a lot, which should be in the fiction section of autobiographies, and that's

Man of a Thousand Faces. Oh, we talked about it with Ron Chaney. Yeah, and James Cagney was in it, and I mean, you know, they with, whenever Hollywood does a biography,

it's like, you know like maybe 1% true. But I always liked watching that. Yeah, I like that film. It's a better film than Hello Down There. Oh, yes. But getting to the Cheneys, I think the first monster movie I ever saw, the first one I remember, I remember we were staying. My family lived in Coney Island.

And as a big vacation, we rented a bungalow in Brighton. Oh, I like this story. Which is like, you know, it's like a five-minute drive. You really went all out. Your dad went all out. Yeah, yeah. You could do, an old lady could walk from Coney Island to Brighton. It was about three blocks away.

A family outing. Yeah. So we were like, we were two minutes away from our house, and we were in Brighton. And I remember watching TV, and it was Lon Chaney Jr. And also, I think, Robert Shane, who played Inspector Henderson. Yeah, in Superman. And I think Joe Flynn from McHale's Navy was in it, in both playing more mad scientist parts.

But it was The Indestructible Man. I know that one. Terrible movie. Yeah. But I just enjoyed watching it. And you have good memories of it because in some way it's connected to that trip. Yes. And that time of your life.

Yes. Where we were like three feet away from our old house. Right. We vacationed. You should have gone for the underwater trip. Yeah, it would have made more sense. Bright and near the ocean. So I think we're going to, I don't know if this is a term or we're going to coin this term,

but you've heard of comfort food. We'll ask our listeners, name some comfort films. Yes. Tell us, write us, post it. Gilbert Podfreed is the Twitter. I simply, I just blanked on the name of the website. Gilbertpodcast.com. Or just, or on Facebook.

Just tell us movies that you loved as a kid that you don't necessarily even think were very good. And subscribe. Dara is telling me. Yeah, on iTunes. On iTunes. And write reviews. But in the meantime, just post and tell us some films that brought you comfort. Well, I know, like, both of us, like, you would watch the Bowery Boys movies.

Sure, sure. And those. The ANC movies were like that on Sundays. Yeah. Yeah, you'd watch them over and over again, even if you didn't like them. Yeah, and they also had those terrible Blondie movies. Oh, yeah. With Penny Singleton and, was she Blondie?

Penny Singleton and Arthur was she Blondie? Penny Singleton and Arthur Lake? Arthur Lake was, do you know something? The minute and to this day, when I watch the actor, William H. Macy, I always think if they ever remade those Blondie pictures, William H. Macy would be perfect as Dagwood. And you just reminded me of another movie I liked as a kid

and I didn't think it was very good and I'm not a Red Skelton fan but The Fuller Brushman. Oh, yes! It was a movie I liked having on. And that's what

I'm talking about. Movies that you grew up with that were on television, you knew on some level even if you were a kid that they weren't very good but you just, you came back to them

again and again. You know, a lot of the Evan Costello stuff. Oh, yeah. You know, even, like I said, even the bad ones, even like Go to Mars. Oh, yeah. Even the ones that aren't very good. I'd watch over and over again just for the comfort. And Hello Down There was one of those.

And I think little, well, little kids like to watch one thing like a million times in a row. like to watch one thing like a million times in a row. And I think with little kids, they like that feeling of security they get, knowing exactly what's coming up. Yeah, yeah, yeah. My wife will watch the same movie 40, 50, and 60 times, and she'll say, I know this isn't any good, but it gives me comfort.

Does your wife do that? It gives me comfort to know what's coming. His wife doesn't talk to him. No. Anyway, so post on Facebook or tweet us and write us and tell us what your comfort movie is. Yeah, his wife says, this movie gives me comfort,

which is more feelings than you give me. This movie gets me more aroused. And this is Valerie Boy's Go to Outer Space. You know my wife. Yes. Okay. This has been Gilbert and Frank's Amazing Colossal Obsessions. That's it. Give me that fract, colossal obsessions

Give me that fract, colossal obsessions Give me that fract, colossal obsessions