Girls Gone Bible - Friendships | Girls Gone Bible

Episode Date: September 8, 2023

happy friday besties :) we loveeee you today we talk about one of our most requested topics — friendships! we get deep into our friendship with one another; how we keep it healthy, how we center it around God, how we support one another while also holding each other accountable (a few ridiculous stories like usual lol) we cover how to make friends, how to know when to walk away from a friendship, what to do with gossip/mean girls and how to recover from friend fallouts. “Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.” 1 Thessalonians 5:11 Jesus loves us so much and wants us to love each other the way He does. let’s make Him proud in doing that. God bless you. we miss you already. stay connected on instagram for updates on when we’re going live. -Ang & Ari if you’d like to support Girls Gone Bible 🙏🏻🕊️🤍 Paypal- https://www.paypal.me/girlsgonebibleinfo Venmo- https://www.venmo.com/u/girlsgonebible

filter through the mind of christ we surrender to you girls gone bible belongs to you may we be your mouthpiece your hands and your feet to do your work to spread the gospel heavenly father this is not about us this is all about you anything we say comes through you jesus we also hope this message reaches everyone in such a way that they build their friendships and find friendships in Jesus' name. In Jesus' name, amen. All right. Are we rolling? Hello, GGB fam. Happy Friday, you guys. How are you? We don't ever do an intro, so we have to start doing that. If you're new to Girls Gone Bible, my name is Angela. My name is Ari. And this is a podcast where we talk about Jesus and the Bible and life and all those things. And it's okay if you're not Christian. We encourage you to stay because we talk about a multitude of things. And I think that every episode could inspire you, even if you don't know what we're talking about. It's a Bible for degenerates. Truly.

Jesus for degenerates. It really is. But today we're going to be talking about friendships. Friendships are the most important thing. Yeah, and it's one of our most requested topics. I think a lot of people see our friendship. our most requested topics. I think a lot of people see our friendship and, you know, not to toot our own horn, but some people are a little inspired by it because we have a very genuine friendship and we love each other so much. And friendships, just like every other part of life, can be really difficult sometimes to navigate. And we have so much to talk about, but today we're going to start, first of all, actually, Ari has a confession to make.

What? Wait, what? Can you update everyone where you are at with your ratnophobia? Oh, yeah, okay. I didn't want to tell this story because it's actually really bad. Okay, then we don't have to tell it. No, no, no, we can't. Okay, I just feel bad. I'm like, I just out my friends. No, this is bad, you guys. I'm on the highway, and my life consists now of when I'm in my house and in the car, I'm just looking everywhere if there's spiders.

I've never seen so many in my life. You guys know I have such a phobia of them. Anyway, so, of course, I'm on the highway in traffic, and I look up, and what is crawling on my mirror? This big spider. I have a complete panic attack. I cannot breathe. I call Angela.

I'm like, I can't breathe. Help me. And she's like, R, please. It's okay. It's okay. And then I felt it on my body, and I completely start going like this. And what happens? I crash into the car in front of me.

When I heard her say, because at first, so we get on the phone, and I mute it, right? Because I'm laughing because it's funny. I can't help it. I know. It's not funny, Angela. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I love you.

I'm here for you for your phobia, but it's just so so funny when you call me and there's nothing I can do for you. She'll call me when I'm in Florida and she'll be screaming and I'm like, there's nothing I can do. But, like, I'm here to give you support. So I mute it and I'm laughing because I'm like, ha, ha, ha, O, R, her, you know, antics and whatever. And then when I hear, oh, my gosh, I just crashed. Oh, my gosh, I just crashed. I go, you're kidding. You're actually joking right now.

The girl felt so bad for me. I go, I'm so sorry. She knew. I would feel bad for you, too. I would definitely not go through insurance. Can you tell who wears the pants in our relationship? We both wear the pants. You really think?

Yeah. 100%. When do I wear the pants? I don't We both wear the pants. You really think? Yeah. I 100%. When do I wear the pants? You wear the pants. I don't want to wear the pants. You, no, we equally wear the pants. You think so? Yeah.

I can't believe, so Ari brought some, so this is what a true edifying friendship looks like. Ari brought something to my attention yesterday and I've been dwelling on it for about 24 hours. hours she told me that I said I'm sensitive and that like sometimes when she wants to confront me about something or like criticize me she gets a little bit nervous I have not stopped thinking about it for 24 hours because here's the thing and it's a pride thing and I remember I read a book The Bait of Satan and it talks all about pride and I was like oh I. And I remember I read a book, The Bait of Satan, and it talks all about pride. And I was like, oh, I don't have pride. I read the book and I'm like, I have so much pride. It's not even funny.

I like when you first come to me, my ego will be like, there's no way. There's no way I got that wrong or there's no way I'm doing that wrong or whatever. And then but like I will like take in what you're saying and then I'll eventually. You always come around. I do come around. But I need to work on, like, coming around in the moment. I just take such pride in being real with my friends. Like, I have to be real.

And I never want my friends to feel uncomfortable and feel like they have to hide things from me when I'm being honest. But I think that's really important in a friendship is to be honest, you guys. And even today. So we're in the car and I pick her up this morning and I'm like, listen, I've been dwelling for a long time. Like, do you really feel like I'm too sensitive and you can't tell? And she's like, it's not that I can't tell you. I'm just sometimes I'm afraid. Like, I don't want you to think I'm judgy.

And I literally go, I don't care if I get mad at you or if I yell at you or if I this, that and the other. You better be honest with me regardless. I'm giving you permission regardless of my reaction. Yeah, you're so, what did I say to you? Oh yeah, I said you're too sensitive. Yeah. You're too sensitive. All right, so today we're going to read one of the most beautiful stories on friendship

in the Bible, and that is Ruth. So. I love this story. I love Ruth. This is in the Old Testament. And should we give a little background on what's going on? Why don't you say what you were saying to me last night? Okay, so this story is about the friendship aspect of it is between Ruth and Naomi. Naomi is Ruth's mother-in-law. So there's Naomi and her husband, and then they have two children. Their names are really hard to pronounce, and I didn't look it up, so I'm not

going to try, but they have two sons, and then the sons have wives, and that's Ruth and Orpah. Nothing was funnier than last night when Ari called her Oprah. It's Orpah, not Or-Oprah. We're in this with you guys. We're learning. I go, I can't believe her name was Oprah. And I look close and I'm like, yo, that's Orpah. But so there was at the time a famine in Israel and they were in Bethlehem and there was no food. So they traveled to Moab and Ruth and Orpah are both from Moab.

Moabites and Israelites are not fans of each other. They don't like each other. They have different religion. Israelites believe in God, the one God. And then Moabites believe in multiple gods. And so they travel from Israel to Moab. And along the way, all three husbands die. Naomi's husband dies and both of her sons die.

And so they're left with three widows. And we'll take it up from there. And it's such a beautiful story about faithfulness, friendship, loyalty, being there for people when they're down. So we're going to do Ruth chapter one and start at one. First one. Elimelech's family goes to Moab. Now it came to pass in the days when the judges ruled that there was a famine in the land and a certain man of Bethlehem, Judah, went to dwell in the country of Moab and he and his wife and his two sons the name of the man was Elimelech the name of his wife was Naomi and the names of the two sons were Milan and Chilean

Ephrathites of Bethlehem Judah and they went to the country of Moab and remained there when Elimelech Naomi's husband died and she was left and her two sons. Now they took wives of the women of Moab. The name of one was Orpah and the name of the other was Ruth. And they dwelt there about 10 years. Then both Milan and Chilean also died. So the women survived her two sons and her husband. Talk about grief for Naomi. Naomi returns with Ruth.

Then she arose with her daughters-in-law that she might return from the country of Moab. For she had heard in the country of Moab that the Lord had visited his people by giving them bread. Therefore she went out from the place where she was, and her two daughters-in-law were with her. And they went on the way to return to the land of Judah. And Naomi said to her two daughters-in-law, Go, return each of her mother's house. The Lord deal kindly with you guys, as you have dealt with the dead and with me. The Lord grant that you may find rest, each in the house of her husband.

In this context, what that means when she says, The Lord grant that you may find rest. Rest is referred to the security that's found in marriage. So she kissed them and they lifted up their voices and wept. And they said to her, surely we will return with you to your people. But Naomi said, turn back, my daughters. Why will you go with me? Are there still sons in my womb that they may be your husbands?

Turn back, my daughters, go, for I am too old to have a husband. If I should say I have hope, if I should have a husband tonight and I should also bear sons, would you wait for them till they were grown? Would you restrain yourselves from having husbands? No, my daughters, for it grieves me very much for your sakes that the hand of the Lord has gone out against me. Then they lifted up their voices and wept again and Orpah kissed her mother-in-law but Ruth clung to her and she said look your sister-in-law has gone back to her people and to her gods return after your sister-in-law but Ruth said entreat me not to leave you or to turn back from following after you for for wherever you go i will go and wherever you lodge i will lodge your people shall be my people and your god my god where you die i will die and where there and there will i be buried. The Lord do so to me. And more also, if anything but death parts you and me. Wherever you go, I will go.

Beautiful. We're stopping there, right? Yeah. Okay. Yeah, this passage right here, Ruth 1, verses 16 and 17. Entreat me not to leave you or to turn back from following after you. Wherever you go, I will go. Your people shall be my people and your God, my God.

So Orpah not only left her mother-in-law and the people and all of that, she also left God. She went to return to Moab where they worship gods that are not the true God. to return to Moab where they worship gods that are not the true God. And homegirl Ruth, really, not only was she loyal to her mother-in-law, not only was she loyal to her husband that has passed, now she's loyal to God. And I just think that we'll talk about loyalty, we'll talk about everything, but I don't know.

It's probably in the top five most important things in life and characteristics to have is loyalty absolutely I mean yeah that's probably the for me I mean where I'm from like that's the number one thing is loyalty that's what I value so much in you and I's friendship is I can count on you to be so loyal like you are so loyal to a fault I just it's it's for me the number one loyalty are you going to be a loyal you know yeah can I trust that if my name is brought up in a room where I'm not there are you going to handle it to where I don't even need to defend myself are you going to do the right thing when no one's watching and have my back you know what I mean you know in Ruth chapter two we wanted to read this as well because it's a really it's when Ruth meets her future husband Boaz who is of Boaz is a relative of Naomi's husband's family

right so he's like a distant relative they know each other Naomi Ruth goes into the field where Boaz is and she kind of like almost presents herself to be seen by him and this is what he says to her it's Ruth chapter 2 verse 10 so she Ruth fell on her face and bowed down to the ground and said to him why have I found favor in your eyes that you should take notice of me since I am a foreigner? And Boaz answered and said to her, it has been fully reported to me all that you have done for your mother-in-law since the death of your husband and how you have left your father and your mother and the land of your birth and have come to a people whom you did not know before. The Lord repay your work and a full reward be given to you by the Lord God of Israel,

under whose wings you have come for refuge. I love that. And then Angela and I were reading and we read down and it explains, Boaz explained that he favored Ruth because she had shown loyal love to her mother-in-law, Naomi. He then gave her a blessing, asking that God would be abundantly reward to Ruth in a remarkable way and it's true when you show loyal love the other thing I love about Ruth too is that she was a servant and I think that's really important also even in friendships is to serve yeah to to be a servant and had she not been a servant you know um her destiny i don't

think would have came true like she she boaz saw how much she served and that's why she was so rewarded yeah which is so beautiful i just think it's really important to be at service to others a hundred percent and a lot of people have such egos like i I don't want to do that. I don't want to serve. David called himself a servant over and over again. Daniel found favor in the eyes of the kingdom because he was a servant. Jesus said, I didn't come to be served. I came to serve. You know?

100%. God really, really rewards loyalty. I think it's a really high character trait to have. It's the most important when you if you're can't just be loyal to something or somebody because it benefits you in the moment. And then when it's no longer benefiting you, your loyalty will lie elsewhere. I know I come from a family and a culture where the truth is we have blind loyalty. We're loyal whether you're right or you're wrong, whether you're up or you're down. And sometimes having that type of loyalty can put you out in a way, but I don't care. I would rather be like that.

Me too. I mean, Ruth really pledges that no matter what kind of love to Naomi, and that's why I loved this story so much because I feel like that's our friendship. We have that no matter what kind of love, no matter what you're going through, no matter what, I'll be right there for you to pick up the pieces.

You know what I love? You know what my favorite thing about this story? Because it really does remind me of our friendship because Ruth and Naomi, their true bond was bred in the midst of grief and like strong grief profound grief and when one was weak the other one had to be strong and you and I that's what we are built on like one day I give 80 you can give 20 the next day you give 90 I can only give 10 oh yeah that's what's so beautiful about our friendship I love it truly and I don't know if

you know I love this story but I don't know if anyone knows about me and Ari is the beginning of our friendship I'll just say it very quickly we became friends in a time where we were going through so much in our personal lives we were both you know having a lot of issues both sad both swore off men we're both both like we need to get right. We need to get our heads right. And then we dove into the Bible together. We watched the Chosen series every night together. We read the Bible every morning.

We had sleepovers upon sleepovers. And we got so close to God together. Little did we know it's because of this. Like we had no idea what he was planning. But you know what I love about our friendship too we always hold each other accountable for God yeah you know if we're not diving into the word you'll be like did you read the bible today come on we need to sit down we need to have Jesus time in the morning and that to me I've never experienced that in a friendship yeah and I think that's what makes our friendship so

beautiful is that we really like the way we love God together I just he just knew he just I will look at you sometimes and I'll be like Jesus knew exactly what he was doing. I mean. It's so true. People, I went to go get a facial the other day by the same girl Ari referred me. I go and get the facial. She goes, are you guys the same person? She goes, you guys are the same person. We are so similar.

It's crazy. It's insane. But that, no matter what love Jesus offers. Yeah. And we get a lot of questions like, how do I find friendships like yours? Like, how do I find that? Where do I find that? In the church.

Yeah. Just praying on it, being open, saying yes to everything. Yeah. I really, I always grew up with, I've had my friends since I was a kid so I've always had a really big group of girlfriends but I really needed new friendships um during the time where I was going through a lot and then when I had met you I feel like typically I just be like oh yeah she's nice but I don't really make an effort because I already have my friend group yeah but I feel like with you I really with you with each other like we put an effort like I kept saying yes to things and I I said hey why don't you come and we'll hang out

and I kept we kept texting each other so I think saying yes to things and really putting in effort and and really praying on what kind of friends you are god wants nothing more than for us to have beautiful friendships yeah and so um just ask them absolutely ask them i um i have here let's go over how we keep our friendship strong yeah um i would start with saying we have incredible communication. I know I started off today saying that sometimes I, you know, might be sensitive. But I will say people, when we started Girls Gone Bible, we had so many people tell us, you know, be careful, being best friends, doing business, blah, blah, whatever. I tell every single person, there's nobody that I worry about less than Ari and I, because our line of communication is so open. I could tell you anything. Like I could literally at any moment, if something bothers me, or I don't like something or something feels weird,

I have no issue coming to you because I know that you are the best person I've ever met. And like you have literally zero malicious intent that anything that I say to you, you're immediately like, I would never want you to feel that way. I love you. You know what I mean? We love each other in the most genuine way that we're able to have that communication. I've always said about you and I, zero ego. Zero ego. You cannot have ego.

I spoke about this in the last one, but I really, I always say, okay, I actually love criticism. A lot of people can't take it. I love it. I want you to tell me how it is so I can fix it. And I think that's one thing we can all learn from is like really if someone's telling you how they feel, listen to them. Yeah. And let's try to work through it together. I mean, friendships are a lot like relationships.

Oh, yeah. Yeah. They are relationships minus the romantic and intimate aspect. You know what I mean? Yeah. Yeah. You have to work out friendships the way that you work out relationships yeah another thing I oh um speaking life into each other and and I think that speaking life and accepting goes hand in hand I the one thing that you really do for me

is you speak life into me we do it to each other like we're just always it's like when I when I can't even get out of bed like you she will literally be there to like take me and pull me out yeah and speak life into me and and and praying over each other praying for each other that's a huge one. I mean, keeping our friendships centered in God is massive. Like praying for each other keeps us so close and healthy. I will say that like you speak so much life into me. And I just, I know, and I can tell too because I can tell the way you are about other people is an indication in how you are with me behind my back and behind closed doors. Like, for example, you had something recently where you there's somebody that you are no longer speaking to, whatever.

Something good happened to this person. And, you know, anybody else may have maybe not been upset about the good thing but at least not been genuinely happy seeing your face and the genuine happiness that you had for another person who did not deserve you to be happy for them i in that moment was like this is like truly somebody who needs to be protected at all costs yeah write down the name i want to see what you're talking about yours i what's i what is that says ginger oh yeah okay okay anyways can i give you a call no seriously i what what is it what is it

just say we can cut it out we don't need to write notes no okay so no okay so yes yes yes yeah yeah yeah okay okay okay no but you really are i i see the way that you act with other people and we can get on a whole thing about jealousy and competitiveness because nothing will ruin friendships more than jealousy and competitiveness yeah and on the topic of that i'll i'll just say something about you no um what i always look for in friendships right is like if you're in a group of friends and then say it's me and Angela and a couple of other girls and then they leave. Is Angela going to start talking?

If Angela starts talking about them right when they leave, I'm going to be like, well, what do you say about me when I leave? You have to be very careful with those kind of people. Yeah, absolutely. You know what? Thank you for bringing that up. Because gossip is a huge thing that we need to talk about. God hates it. God hates gossip.

Yeah, I will say that Ari and I spend our time, and I really mean this. It doesn't mean that we have never talked about anyone. Of course we have when something is relevant to our lives, when something is a big deal, when something matters. But I can honestly say in the whole time we've been friends, you will have never caught us sitting there like bagging on somebody talking bad about someone making fun of them we just don't do that we don't spend our time talking about people and even because sometimes you can get caught up in the gossip of the media too yeah and like sometimes i'll catch myself like hey did you see what happened to her and i'll tell you especially since i've gotten so close to god it makes me feel sick like

i'll actually dwell about it i'll be like what like who am i why did i just do that that's conviction and that's god being like that's not that right. Yeah, it doesn't feel good. You think it feels good. It doesn't feel good. Yeah. So none of us are perfect. We all have those moments of like we catch ourselves. But be really aware of it because it's not good.

It doesn't feel good. God wouldn't want that for us. And just remember, we're all going. That's another thing. We're all going through something. So that's another big thing with me and friendships. And it's why I love you so much. Because I could be going through so many weird things, bad times.

You will never leave my side for that. That's a huge one. Like facing the storm with someone instead of walking out on them, you know? And I just, yeah, I think that's a big one. And a lot of times when people aren't right in the head, they're not going to treat you right. And so I've had, I mean, I've had the same friends since I was like five years old. We've been through everything together. My friends have gone through grief through pregnancy and there are times where they where they're just not their selves they don't know how to treat me I don't talk to them for weeks and then we'll pick back up like nothing

yeah those are your soul sisters and that's why like we got a lot of questions saying well what if what if like they're not being right or they're not I don't know what you guys are going through but all I'm saying is nobody's going to be right all the time. I've gone through things where I've lashed out. I haven't been myself. I couldn't be there for someone. Yeah. And I just think that the friends that still stick by your side through that,

hold on to them. They're the special ones. I believe like friends are angels. They're treasures. Yeah. People that stick by you through those times it's so important yeah I like what you said about how sometimes you weren't there for people or if you weren't right and I think we need to because of course you want to look for someone who's going to be there for you through everything right and then I also think we need to manage our expectations on people because the

truth is life happens and people go through things and they can't be there for you the way that you might need them to and that's why it's good to have different people for different things and you can't just expect everybody to be everything for you you know absolutely you you have to accept people for the way they are and just like, yeah, there's we have friends for different reasons and we just have to accept that. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. My my best friend, she lives in New York. She is on her second baby. There is nothing she wouldn't do for me. She is the greatest friend. She has just stood by my side through every single thing in my life and we don't talk every day she can't really fully be there for me she's got a family now she's got kids but I

know that no matter what she will be right there for me and we will pick back up like nothing 100% yeah that's another thing too because a lot of people wrote in saying, what do you do when people change? And this is the problem because we are going to talk about when it's time to walk away from a friendship. But there's something about like a lot of the time relationships, for example, will end because we are constantly changing and evolving. And then you, we are going to grow into different people constantly and sometimes in relationships you think like oh they've changed and so you know we don't mesh together that's why you have to grow together to have really great friendships you have to be okay with your friend changing constantly and you have to re-become friends with the new versions of them it's i know it's the same thing with relationships.

A hundred percent. Like, they go so hand in hand. They do, because it is a relationship. And that's why I'm just like, yeah, if they're your real friends, I have, you guys, like, I have hit the jackpot. There's a lot of things in my life that didn't go so well, but when it comes to my friends,

I've literally hit the jackpot. I mean, they truly are my sisters. I have my friends from back home that stuck by me all the years that I lived in L.A. Like, they're my sisters. And I'm telling you, like, they're your real friends. They'll never leave your side. No matter what. You are the best friend, Arne.

You are the best friend. You are the best friend. And I will say, like, there's been times since being friends where I've gone through some things I you know those times in your life that you would just describe as being shaky like just being rocky like things are going weird and you don't know what's going on and you feel a little lost and a little anxious like every time I have a moment like that, I'm not even kidding. I always think to myself, like, at least I have Ari. I'm always like, like, at least like, I don't know what's happening, but I know I have Ari. And it gives me like a sense of security that like,

you can't like money can't buy something like that. You know what I mean? Cause like, that's what you need in life. You need support need you need that security and like Jesus is that security but I'm telling you when the going gets tough like you are I know I have Ari so I know I'm gonna be good I really love you so much I I know that it's so repetitive again like I, I always say this, but, man, I, you saved my life. You saved mine? No, you truly saved my life. I'm not kidding. You have saved my life.

Like, you have given me, like, if nothing else in my life, like, thank God for you. I know we just talked about, like, praying over each other and stuff. else in my life like thank god for you I know we just talked about like praying over each other and stuff but like I said I've never had someone like you to like I think what's cured so much of my my anxiety and things like that is like when I'm in a moment of crisis you literally will be like okay let's sit down and you'll take my hands and you will just pray over me. And I've never had anything like that. And that's why we encourage you guys like really dive into the word and really just get into it. Because when you are in these tough situations with friends are just and you have people that can literally sit with you and pray over you and pray with you and pray for

you yeah it is truly the most beautiful thing truly I mean when I see you doing that for me I'm like thank you God I knew exactly what you were doing I think yeah with the need to be a friend who other people can rely on like for example I have reliability yeah thank you for bringing that one up I have a lot and and people ask what do you do when you have friends who aren't you know close to Jesus or they're not you know they're more of like worldly friends and whatever. We have many, many worldly friends. We came from the world. We still got friends in the world.

Thank you, Jesus, because we want to have friends in every area of life. That's how you spread the gospel. But there are people in my life who will call me and they're my friends. They're not in my close, close circle, but they are my friends. And they call me and they're my friends they're not in my close close circle but they are my friends um and they call me and i know that these these people can't do anything for me right like they can't pour into me they can't really give me advice because i probably wouldn't you know necessarily take their advice but i know that my purpose in in being in their life is to edify them and to help and to bring them closer to Jesus and all that stuff. And you kind of just have to differentiate the relationships in your life

and see what purpose each friendship serves and what you serve for them. Like if I need someone to talk to or to call or to be with, I'm going to call Ari, right? If I need advice, I'm going to call Ari because I know she's going to give me sound biblical good advice. I'm not going to necessarily call my friends who I don't fully trust their judgment, but you don't have to like exile people just because they're not close to Jesus. I actually encourage you to keep those people close, not to the point where they're negatively affecting you and bringing you down, but to the point where you can inspire them. I agree with you on that. Yeah. We got that question a lot. Like, do I stay friends with people that are non-Christians? I'm so deep into my walk, into my values and my faith that

you couldn't bring me away from that because, you know, you really are the five people who you hang out with. You are like them the most. But if you are so grounded in your values, it's okay. I mean, I really do have friends from all walks, too. But that was perfect what you said. You know, I'm obviously not going to call them for advice. I'll call you. But I think having friends of all walks that we can share the gospel with and bring people to I mean

that that you're right that's a purpose that is our purpose yes and and I just think that you need to be you need to like be aware of where you are in your faith because like you said you're so strong in your faith that you can go into the world I'm not worried about you like I I would be comfortable with you going in any environment ever and not compromising your values because that's where you are someone who's maybe a bit newer yes i was yes maybe they need to be more careful so you just need to be aware of where you are i know everybody gets influenced actually no you can't say i'm not going to get influenced because everybody will you spend enough time in a place oh absolutely oh absolutely. Oh, oh, oh.

Talk about reliability. What? So we have a story, and we're going to throw a clip on the thing. But we have a story of one time. How do we explain this? So, okay, let me set the scene. Okay, so Angela and I had dinner plans. And she's always right there.

Okay, I'll be there to pick you up. So I get ready and I'm sitting there and I'm waiting for her. I'm doing my makeup. Oh, she's probably a little late. So then I call her. 20 minutes goes by. Well, her phone's off. I'm like, wait, what's going on?

I go, I heard she must be on do not. I don't know. Why isn't her phone off? So I'm sitting there 30 minutes go by an hour goes by now i'm pacing i'm like where is she okay she come in why isn't she answered so then an hour and 30 goes by now i think she's dead i can't believe it. I had these crazy thoughts that you got stolen, you're dead. So I'm like, what's going on? So then I black out and call your mom.

My mother, my poor mother. She's all the way in Florida. Her mother, who is the cutest, funniest woman you will ever meet. She's so cute, but that girl will think the absolute worst. You tell her I can't find Angela, Angela's dead. That's where it goes. You can't scare my mom, okay? I shouldn't have called her.

It was the biggest mistake. So I call, I call mom. I go, I don't want to freak you out or anything, but it's been over an hour and Angela hasn't answered. I was like, have you talked to her? She goes, oh, my Lord. She's like, she's like, I knew it. I had a feeling.

I had a feeling you need to go there right now. I go, OK, OK, it's OK. I'm going to I'm going to head there right now. So I get in the car. She's calling me over and over again. She goes like this. She says to me, she goes, listen, in the car she's calling me over and over again she goes like this she says to me she goes listen harielle if you get there and you see the body just leave it she tells me that if i see your body to leave my dead body i go i go i go her like her dad her like her remains she goes yes

just just leave it and get out okay i'm so i'm sitting i'm sitting at the red light i see an ambulance my head is spinning i get to your house i have sweat pouring down my face when i'm upset my boston accent is i sound like a different person, you guys. I'm not even kidding. I did not even know she had a DoorDash camera, whatever it is. DoorDash? What is it? DoorDash is like Postman's first name.

What is it called? It's the Ring camera. Oh, the Ring camera. All right. So she comes knocking on my door like crazy and i'm just like i was in a conversation basically i was in a conversation couldn't leave but my phone died and then i i just hear banging on the door i run downstairs and play the clip this is what i see yeah i thought you were dead i hate you oh my god i'm gonna kill you what happened

your phone's been off for almost two hours all right yeah i like i thought you were dead i thought you were dead i in that moment go you received the best friend of the year award for this. It was so cute. You don't even know the thoughts that were going through my head. Why'd you call my mom? Because I thought you were dead. I thought you were dead. You were gone. I'm out, too.

I ain't staying in this crazy world without you. You know what? Oh, okay. You know what being a good friend is? oh okay you know what being a good friend is being a good friend is somebody that we touched on it a little bit but like speaking life being supportive being honest while being supportive but I think you when you have genuine intentions in a friendship people feel that you know we have both been in situations where we've had to end friendships based on the other person kind of getting a little weird there's a lot of stories especially with women

there's a lot of stories, especially with women, where there is the thing of being like a low-key hater, where you have a friend that all of a sudden maybe starts putting you down a little bit, maybe doesn't have the right intentions, maybe you can tell they've started to develop a little bit of competitiveness with you. Like, what do you do? what do you do in that situation it's tough because I think when people act like that it's it's really really within themselves they're going through a deep pain within themselves

and I give them grace because people don't feel good inside and sometimes you don't act like yourself. And it doesn't mean they're bad people. It just means that they're hurting. They're hurting in some sort of way. And sometimes you don't even know why you're hurting. It turns into anger and then it comes out as jealousy and hate towards the other people. It's so true. Yeah. And I've been in this situation and I really try to stick with them

because I take pride in just sticking by people because I've had friends that stuck by me when I wasn't right yeah and I just think it's so circumstantial I mean if you're if you're in a place where they're really being so judgmental and they're not speaking life into you and they're putting you down and it's just taking away from your life because you have to be very careful with people. Like if you're around someone and they're making you feel so down and out, it's going to affect your life. It's going to affect your career. It's going to affect everything. It's going to destroy your confidence. It's going to hurt your confidence and then you're not going to be able to be your best self yeah and so i'm a big advocate

if someone isn't i have really learned boundaries this past year i was just about to mention boundaries yeah like i've had to really learn boundaries and and not because i'm one of those people that i'm like nope gotta stick by to stick by them, got to be loyal. And it's really hurt me. Yeah. So now I'm like, if you're going to if you're going to act like this and you're not going to be good to me, well, then I have to let you go. And if you want to come around and take accountability of your actions and say, I'm really sorry for the way I spoke to you. Let me show you that I'm a good friend.

I'm all for second chances. Oh, I love that. I love that. I was going to mention boundaries. You and I have phenomenal boundaries with each other. We really do. I also, because of just the way that I grew up, I was like, I used to be very anxious attachment in my friendships, not in relationships, but in my friendships, because I knew relationships were a little bit different in friendships like I have I think I have a fear of abandonment you do a little bit have you noticed you know I only noticed that recently and I don't know why no I don't think anybody left me we all do I just yeah I just I'm always afraid that you know when I was younger I'd be so scared

that like one falling out would mean that somebody didn't want to be my friend anymore and it's it's hard because I'm not like that I can get over a fight I can recover and a lot of the times it felt like other people weren't like that you know yeah I think it I know we don't like to go deep but I I I feel like I'm like that with you sometimes too I'm like I I don't like to go deep, but I feel like I'm like that with you sometimes too. I'm like, I don't want to disappoint people. And I think that goes back to like when we were kids. Like I'm sure you had somebody not be so good to you as a kid. Yeah.

I'm definitely like that with you. I have fear of abandonment in the sense that like I just, I remember in the beginning of our friendship, I was a little bit like I just in the I remember in the beginning of our friendship I was a little bit like I would avoid conflict not that we like fight by any means we literally never have problems so like I would avoid even speaking my mind because I was I just didn't want to lose you and I didn't know what type of person you were and then eventually over time I saw that like no this girl is solid we're solid and it's. And it's weird because people usually don't think this way about friendships

because it's kind of weird to like be afraid to lose a friend. It's like that's not your boyfriend. Like, well, it shouldn't be like that. But it is. And it's like that for a lot of people. People feel left out. People feel ignored, abandoned. Like speak on that.

People can be a little weird with you. And I think it's because you are so solid in yourself, and so secure, and so giving. And so you just don't, the thing about you is you don't have a jealousy bone. Truly, you don't. I mean, and that's why I love you so much, because you don't have that sort of ego. Most people do, unfortunately. You know? And you just are like, and I think sometimes, like, people want to get that out of you in a way. I've noticed that with people and you.

Do you know what I think it is? I don't even know if I'm going to keep this in. But you know what I've noticed a lot is because I'm really, like, I'm very validating as a friend and really, like. Yes, you are. I'm just, like, I'll be there. Especially when I love someone, like, I put them on a pedestal. And, like, you will be, like, my world in a lot of ways. Like, I love people.

When I love you, I love you. If you're in Angela's world. I just, I love people so much. And the second that they, it's almost like a control thing the second I put up a boundary people feel like they're losing control and they don't like that and that's the case in a lot of situations for a lot of people and that's why like conflict will arise they'll be like excuse me like you you've never you know like you're putting up a boundary who do you think you are type of thing?

You've really taught me boundaries. I love boundaries. I think it is so, oh, I think it is so good. And I used to be like, no, that's mean. Like we shouldn't do, no, it's crucial. If you don't have boundaries, you will get walked all over your whole life. You have to have boundaries. I have really, I'm like the boundary queen now i

really have strict boundaries with people whenever i feel some weird energy from someone i'm like if you're not a hundred percent supporter you're a hundred percent hater like i don't i can't you will not you won't be around me i don't want that energy around me i can see through it it's not good you have to be you really have to be careful with people you really do yeah so there's it's it's it's not good you have to be you really have to be careful with people you really do yeah so there's it's it's it's like uh you have to pray so much this is my favorite thing in conflict with friends or because people ask questions what do you do when you're being left out what do you do when people aren't you know your friends doesn't want to be your friend anymore this or that pray about. Pray about it.

Pray about it. Pray about the conflict. Bring invite the Holy Spirit into your situation. And he will one either make it better and bring reconciliation or he will put it on your heart that it's time to walk away. I think that's the answer. I wish I knew this when I was younger. I always felt left out as a kid, like with friends and stuff. Like I wouldn't, I mean, that's what we go through as kids.

But I wish I knew when I was younger to like really ask God and pray. Because, you know, with everything now, I, even with how I found Angela, I know it was because I prayed on it. Everything I prayed, I asked, it was because I prayed on it everything I prayed I asked it was literally her and so I know it sounds I don't know I just when you want friendships really pray on it yeah the best thing and the thing too a lot of the time in friendships I think people and it's so sad and it's it's a really sad reality and that's why you have to pray and ask God to bring the right people into your life because the truth is that a lot of people love you when you're down that's the truth people love you when you're down they

want to be there for you because it's like oh poor thing poor thing. Like I'll, I'll be there. The second you start getting better, the second you start coming up, it's hard for people. And the sad thing is it's like, you know, you can look down on those people, but it's a very normal human emotion. Um, but that's the truth. Some people will love you when you're down and some people won't want to see you do well. So you just have to really be careful. And you can't have those people around you because it will suck the life out of you. It'll keep you down and you have to really be careful. It's funny that you mention that

because the couple of friends that were the closest to my heart actually are not in my life anymore because of that. Yeah. And you have to be careful with those people. You don't leave people aside, but people like that you have to be careful with. Yeah. Jealousy is, again, we've talked about it before, but it's a human emotion. It happens.

Jealousy is normal. Projecting your jealousy and insecurity on other people is where the problem lies you can feel that jealousy internalize it and then go pray about it and be like god take this jealousy out of my heart put replace it with gratitude for where i am and may i be inspired by their success or whatever and take away the jealousy but to sit there and project your jealousy onto people is really low. It is. And I encourage if anyone's going through that right now, it's okay.

We all go through that. But as long as you can really see what's going on in your heart and just pray that he works on that and gets some help. Jealousy is evil. It's so evil. It's so evil enemy it will it ruins families it ruins brothers and sisters and long lines of family like it really it's so evil you're so right you know what else i'll say about friendship you really and i i don't know if I said this earlier, but you really know who, if someone's your real friend in a crisis. I, this past year, I can't even tell you, I really now know who my real friends are. Like when you're down and out, I went through a, I went through something that was so difficult for me that I don't even know how my friends stuck by me but they when I tell you my I don't I

going through a crisis could have been had to be the best thing for me because the way I value my friends now they are my angels my world my treasures and, like, even if I'm in a relationship, because sometimes it can be really hard when you're in a relationship, you sort of forget your friends. Guys, your girlfriends are the greatest gifts you can ever have. And so when they're there for you through those bad times and the ones that don't leave your side. So true.

I was going to say, back to what you said about, you know, you, what did you say? Because you went through a lot and your friends were there for you. And there were two moments that they couldn't. You don't even know how they handled you. How they handled me. Well, I will say about Ari, just what I said about projecting onto people you and I've told you from the very beginning you have something are where you are able to you could be going

through the worst thing in the world but people are attracted to you and want to help you in those situations and you are I told you this morning you could never annoy me because you don't project your stuff onto other people you can come into my house with the heaviest hardest energy and you're going through so much and if it was somebody else it would have drained me I don't get drained from you because you don't project it yeah it's incredible and you need to tell people how to do that I mean what about when I'm when I'm dwelling I you don't you don't annoy me you don't it doesn't feel too much because we love each other so much and but there have been trust me i've lost a couple

friends because but that they weren't but that's what i mean like again i'm gonna keep saying this the women that are supposed to stay in your life will be like angela and will look at you with such grace and be like, you don't annoy me. I love you. I will stay by you. That's because you're my real friend. Not everyone feels that way, though. You know what I dealt with this past year.

When Ari does it, when you could literally, like, I don't know, like do a jumping jack and I'd be like, that's my girl. Love her. Like, I'm just so proud of you for everything it's but i don't know you've taught me everything you've taught me everything you've taught me so much you have the best people skills you have oh i do you have the best you should teach a master class on how to work oh no no no no have you seen my videos on Instagram of how she walks in a room? I can't. Can I read some scripture on it? Yeah, please.

Yes. Read scripture. What were you going to say? Yes, read scripture. Let's read a little scripture on friendship, right? It's 1 Thessalonians 5.11. Therefore, encourage one another and build each other up just as in fact you are doing.

1 Corinthians 1533. Do not be misled. Bad company corrupts good character. That's a good one. Ecclesiastes Don't laugh. Is that how you say it?

Yeah, Ecclesiastes 4 Don't laugh. Is that how you say it? Yeah, Ecclesiastes 410. If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up. That should be your life, Earth. What? You always pick people up. I love you. Last one.

Proverbs 1628. A perverse person stirs up conflict and a gossip separates close friends. We didn't get to our questions, but we had... We probably had more questions on this than anything ever. What we're going to do is we are going to go on live

maybe Saturday. And answer the questions. And answer the questions. Tell us what you guys think. By the way, GGB baptism, I'm not telling you it's going to be soon we're not telling you when but we're saying we are talking about it we're thinking about it and we want to put some cool cool cool cool thing together okay you know okay okay uh we'll answer

the questions on live maybe this weekend stay in the bible read the word jesus loves you so much may the lord bless you and keep you may he make his face shine upon you and be gracious to you may he turn his face towards you and give you peace, joy, love positivity and happiness all the days of your lives may Jesus be with you every moment of your day we love you we love you guys so much

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