Girls Gone Bible - Overcoming OCD | Girls Gone Bible

Episode Date: August 16, 2024

hiiiiii ggbbbbbb:) this weeks episode hits close to home for both of us. we talk all things OCD. Obsessive Compulsive Disorder  is often portrayed in movies and media as a person who is a germaphobe or intensely organized. But in reality-- OCD is a mental disorder that can absolutely torment people and affect their ability to function in every day life. we cover intrusive thoughts and how to no longer let them rule you. we back it with Scripture to show you how to genuinely take your thoughts captive and make them obedient to Christ. we love you all more than you know. Jesus loves you more. you are safe in your mind and body. your mind belongs to Jesus. -Ang & Ari WE ARE ON THE OFFICIAL GIRLS GONE BIBLE LIVE TOUR! www.girlsgonebible.com/tour for the first batch of cities we have locked in :) WE LOVE YOU AND CANNOT WAIT TO SEE YOU! if you’d like to support Girls Gone Bible 🙏🏻🕊️🤍 Paypal- https://www.paypal.me/girlsgonebibleinfo Venmo- https://www.venmo.com/u/girlsgonebible

Hey guys, I'm Ange. And I'm Ari. And this is Girls Gone Bible. We're a faith-based podcast. We talk all things, mental health, spirituality, specifically Jesus and the Bible. We are die-hard Jesus fans here at Girls Gone Bible, and our goal is that you guys would know Him better. I've been thinking so much recently about the,

I've been saying like, make Jesus famous, make Jesus famous. And I feel like I've realized recently that Jesus is famous. But the truth of who Jesus is is not yet famous. And that's what we wanna do here is show everybody who Jesus is. Yeah. How was your week, R?

It's really good. I, Sunday I went to church and as I was your week, R? It's really good. I, um, Sunday I went to church and, um, as I was coming out, I, it's just so cute. I saw this girl and she was, I said, how old are you? She knew us from GGB and she said, I'm just 21. I said, who are you here with? She said, I'm by myself. And she just had her little Bible with her. And she said, I've just been chasing them. And it was really hard for me to go to church at first by myself, but I've been doing it. And I'm so proud of myself.

And I just got in my car and I just had tears just streamed down my face. And I just wanna let you guys know how proud we are of you guys. These young, we're seeing so many young people and to be bold and I know sometimes it can feel a little nerve wracking to go to church by yourself.

And I just wanna say how proud we are of you for taking that leap of faith and going and just chasing Jesus at such a young age. And I also wanna say how proud I am of people in their 30s, 40s, 50s, 60s that thought it was too late and they're now chasing him as well. It's crazy what's happening. And it is even, I always say like, it's just so impressive when people come to faith later

in life. It's impressive when you're young, but then when you've lived your life a certain way for all those years, and then you come to faith and you have to like literally rewire your whole programming and everything you've ever known is so impressive, especially if you've never seen it modeled before. So impressive. The faith. It's just, we really are so proud and we love you guys so much. This is going to be a really tough episode for me. I have had so much, I don't know what I'm gonna do.

Everyone's getting sick, it's insane. I've been, I mean, I went to the doctor and like my, I'm not, I can't be contagious or anything, it's been too long, but I have this lingering cough and I've never had a cough like this before, but it is driving me nuts. I was up all night, it's just, I've never had a cough like this before, but it is driving me nuts. I was up all night. It's just, I've never experienced this before. Have you ever had a really bad cough? Yeah, what did the doctor say? Was it COVID?

We didn't test because he was like, it's too late. You've been sick for like a week and a half. It's fine. He gave me antibiotics for the cough. My mom calls me and she goes, only you two dummies would be telling everyone at GGB that you guys got COVID. Listen we're honest we've always been honest we'll always be honest here. Yeah so today Ari and you know what's so funny is we've been planning on talking about OCD today for weeks now. We've had it planned. I got multiple messages yesterday of people saying, Ange, I'm struggling with OCD.

It was before I put up a box on GGB on the Instagram. Multiple people messaged me and saying, I am struggling so much with OCD. What did you do? How did you overcome it? And I literally wrote back and I was like, girl, we're talking about a Friday. I can't believe that you're asking me this right now. I can't believe that you just say that

because I got a bunch of messages too about OCD. So it must be in the air right now. OCD in the air, let's get it away because I'm so tired of it. And you know what, OCD, we'll get into it, but OCD is literally so much more common. I think it's one in 40 people, it said on the NHSA or whatever.

One in 40 people, it's so common and it is the root of so many people's anxiety, panic disorders, eating disorders, addictions. OCD goes so unnoticed, but it's the root of so many people's issues. And I know when I got diagnosed with OCD, and that was a question that we got a lot, how did you know? I was diagnosed when I went to go see a psychiatrist to go be put on an anxiety medication.

And when they told me I had OCD, it was the most freeing thing because I got to go and research it and see what OCD actually is because movies and TV portray OCD as being this like cute little quirky thing that like you are a germaphobe and you like everything organized and people don't understand that it's a mental disorder that literally reeks havoc on your life and in your brain. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's so crazy. I was talking to my dad and my nan when I was home about this. And I was like, Nan, are you into my dad too?

I was like, did you guys have a lot of this? Because I know it's more common than ever now. And I was like, was there a lot of this back then? And my grandmother was like, no, I've never even heard of it back when I was younger. It started to get really bad. In the 60s, when the family unity started separating, and that's when OCD started really becoming really bad.

And then when, obviously, the food and everything, all the chemicals in the food and stuff. Social media. Social media, all of that. That's when OCD started to become so severe. So, yeah, maybe Ari and I both, oh, we can't wait to get into it today. Ari and I have been, we've had the most beautiful journey.

It's so funny, because we have OCD in different ways. And so my OCD compliments her OCD, and it's- God really knew what he was doing, putting us two together with our two complete opposite OCDs. It's ridiculous. But why don't we talk about what kind of... let's talk about where OCD comes from. Let's do it. OCD can come from a painful childhood experience. If you suffered trauma, abuse, bullying,

so that's where the obsessions and the compulsions come from. If your parents had similar anxieties and showed similar kinds of compulsive behavior, learning disability, life events, personality traits. So true, I'm actually so happy that you say that because I literally walked in here today and I go, I actually don't know the root of why people have OCD, you know what I mean?

So it is like traumatic events and things that happen and it's also genetic. It can be passed down. Absolutely. Everything happens in your childhood. Oh. Everything happens in your childhood. Protect the kids. Because we spend the rest of our lives trying to undo whatever was done when we were young. It's so bad. And break generational curses.

Break generational curses. I thank God I broke that generational curse for my kids, you know. Setting them up for success. So I wrote down just a couple of, because OCD has like two parts, it's obsessive compulsive disorder. And there's the obsessive part and then there's the compulsive part. And these are kind of the definitions for them. An obsession is an unwanted and unpleasant thought, image or urge that repeatedly enters your mind, causing feelings of anxiety, disgust, or unease. And then the compulsion is a repetitive behavior

or mental act that you feel you need to do to temporarily relieve the unpleasant feelings brought on by the obsessive thought. You can have one, you can have both. I think R, you have probably like the obsessive part, right? Mm-hmm. Yeah. And I have both. Yes. No, you don't. You don't have what I have, do you? Obsessive thought.

When you were younger, or do you feel like you had it in your later 20s? I think I had it when I was battling OCD severely when I was younger. So now it's a lot less. I just through the power of Jesus, everything that I've done to overcome OCD. And of course, there are always little hints of it that I still have to deal with. But the way that I suppress it and keep it at bay and overcome it is through Jesus and through scripture and through the renewal of the mind. But yeah, I mean, between the compulsion, I have compulsions, we'll talk about it with the food, with the, it's the root of my addiction issues, I have a very addictive personality, that's the obsessive part.

Right, right. Oh, got it. Yeah, that makes sense. But I can ruminate on thoughts. And one of the most horrific parts about OCD, I don't even know if you really experience, and I think the intrusive thoughts. Oh, yeah. That's my biggest, yeah. That was my biggest battle back in the day. It's horrible.

It really is. It's debilitating. It is. It really is. Between obsessions and compulsions, this is something that will literally take over your life. I remember when I first started dealing with anxiety, a lot of it for me was fear-based.

The obsessions were fear-based. Intrusive thoughts can come as either a thought, an image, or even a sensation, like a bodily sensation. For me, I used to have horrific thoughts of me getting hurt, somebody I love getting hurt. It's still, even to this day, when I'm around children, I can't see them run fast or run upstairs because I get this wave of genuine, oh my gosh, horrific fear. It's really, really hard.

When I see Sierra and Liam like running around, I'm just, I have pictures of them, like something falling on them, them just like really, really scary stuff. And people who are about to have a baby or just had a baby deal with this a lot. There's a lot of pregnancy and postpartum OCD. A lot of women get diagnosed with OCD after pregnancy because

they have horrible thoughts about their baby getting hurt. And so for me, it was just like this overwhelming fear all the time that something was going to happen, something bad was going to happen. And then so the reason why it causes addiction a lot of the time is two things. One, you use whatever addiction that you have to suppress that emotion. Because you wanna run away from it. Like for me, I wasn't drinking alcohol

because I wanted to like party every day. I wanted to be okay. I wanted it to quiet down in my head. It was 24 hours a day, absolute chaos, turmoil, fear. Just imagine like 24 hours a day, the signals, your fight or flight is going off saying, you are in danger, but literally everybody else is normal. I'm in public and I'm like,

something really bad is about to happen, and everybody's just going on as if, they're not in my head, they don't know the chaos that's going on. And so I would drink to try and suppress that. And then also on the other hand, it's like the obsessive part, you then get obsessed with things that you like.

The alcohol feels good, I like that. The weed feels good, the gambling feels good, I like that. The weed feels good, the gambling feels good, whatever it is. And so, yeah, those are things that I've had to really, really work through. And that, how many years did you say you went through that before you got delivered? I'm curious, I forget.

So it started when I was like 19. I got sober when I was 23. I would spend the next year of my life, really, that was when, that's when I went to go get psychiatric help because I was like, I'm actually losing my mind. OCD makes you feel like you're crazy. OCD makes you have these horrible thoughts that are like, my mind is working in a way that's just not normal. Like other people don't deal with this.

Was it? So were you, so your thoughts weren't like, your thoughts are more like fears of things happening of like death of things happening to your family, things like that. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. That and also ruminating on the past a little bit. If I would make a mistake, I would beat myself up over it.

If I, I would have this thing where I was like, I had this like really bad fear of offending people. And so I would leave a situation, like a social situation, and then think for days about one thing that I said to somebody that I'm like, was that offensive? And then weeks later I'd call the person and be like, I have to say, like, was that, and they'd be like, you're so weird.

Like, that's not, what are you talking about? But you can't, when you get stuck on something, there's not, it feels like there's nothing you can do to get out of the loop. That's still something that I work through. I still will dwell if I offended someone, letting people down. I'm thinking about, because one thing that I do

that's so, it's just silly, because my mom, I got this from my mom, but I will see, for instance, I'll give you an example. I'll see a man, and if I see him, I don't know it. I shouldn't, I don't need to feel bad for him. He's probably got more than I do. It's probably a healthy man. But if I see something and I feel bad for him,

like I'll see him make a sad face. I will think about him like three times a year. How bad I feel. It's like, I have to let it go because it's funny, but it really isn't, because I will dwell so hard and feel sad. It genuinely affects, it's like toxic empathy at some point. It's like, no, it really, it's so hard with OCD, because it sounds like innocent and harmless,

but like it really controls you. That's so funny, yeah. She's sad firsthand. I really have. I feel like I feel so bad for that man. She's like, okay, this is dog-sick. I feel like he's literally fine. He's going to work. He's okay. He's wearing a suit. He's happy. Like everything's okay. It's so sweet though. But yeah, I... What about you? What are your...

Can I ask you a couple more questions about yours? So you, can you just talk about, like I know we talk about this a lot, the repercussions of drinking and self-deprecating when you go to alcohol, when you're trying to escape things. Can you just talk about the repercussions? Because I know so many people that are in your position right now that truly think it's just too late. And they're like, you don't understand.

This is the only way. I can't escape this. Can you just talk about that? And even with like the eating too. Can you just talk about that? And even with the eating too. Can you touch on that while on the subject? Yeah. I think with the alcohol, I mean, so after I got sober, I talked about it in the addiction episode,

but imagine I'm suppressing all these emotions that are still coming up because alcohol and drugs and whatever vice, it doesn't completely take away the negative feelings. It just like distracts you enough, but they're still there. You still feel them. And so when I stopped drinking, imagine I was, my body went into a state of shock because all these years of my declining mental health and this horrific debilitating OCD that had taken over my life and these fears,

I then had to face it. I was able to numb for all these years. I then had no choice but to face it. Yeah. And when I had to face it, my body went into shock because it was too much at one time. And then I spent the next year, it was quarantine. Quarantine was like the best time

of my life, I always say, because that was my year of like spiritual awakening. I really found Jesus. I had so much healing. I stayed with my family, but that's when I started having derealization, depersonalization. And I would literally be sitting like with my family and all of a sudden go, I don't know these people. Like the weirdest. Yeah, like intrusive thoughts that don't make sense. Becoming sober. After being sober, yeah, because the anxiety was so heightened.

I was like, I didn't know who I was. Like it was so, it's so hard to explain. I would literally be like, I don't know who these people are. And then like fear would just go through my body. And then I'd be like, what are you talking about? You're Angela, this is your family, you've known them your whole life.

But the intrusive thoughts were so bad that I started to think something was wrong with me. And so when I called somebody, I told her, I called a therapist and I was like, listen, I'm losing my mind, something is really, really wrong with me. I'm having thoughts that like over, it feels like it's not my voice,

like I don't know how to explain it, but it's this like loud voice, I'll be thinking normal thoughts and then something will say something in my head and I would just give that thought and that voice so much power. I didn't know that you have 20 to 30 thought lies come into your head a minute.

Like it's literally like, I didn't know that these thoughts were just natural things that happen. People who don't have OCD experience the same intrusive, not the same intrusive thoughts, but they still experience intrusive thoughts. But for them, they don't get fixated on it the way that we do. They're able to just acknowledge the fact that that was weird and let it go.

But we're like, no, that was bad. Something is wrong. I've got to stay there. And so for me, I was telling this woman something is severely wrong, and she literally, I've said it on here before, she goes, that happens to people all the time. Nothing is wrong. You're okay. It's just an intrusive thought. You are not your thoughts.

You don't have to give it any power. And so through that year, that was one of the first massive breakthroughs that I had that alleviated so much of the anxiety. And I started breath work and I started like, kind of like meditation where I would just sit and try to clear my mind. And then of course I started reading the Bible and

Everything changed and I began to renew my mind. I started to fill my mind with scripture But it was really really hard and then disordered eating. Can I read something? Yeah, do you mind? Girls Gone Bible we want to talk about the things that nobody talks about which are These intrusive thoughts that people deal with a lot. People, I read, we put up a box on Instagram and people were talking about the intrusive thoughts that they have that are sexual, that are dangerous, that are weird, and we want to come on here to free you guys today. My heart is so burdened by people who deal with this in their mind because you feel crazy when really you're

just giving power to the wrong voice. You're not crazy and it's okay. And guess what? People, it's more common than you think for somebody to be in church and have a sexual thought. It actually happens to people all the time. People have dangerous thoughts. They imagine themselves even hurting somebody else.

You're not a bad person. You're not crazy. You're not going to hurt anybody and it's okay. And with the eating disorders and stuff, people don't really talk about this either and I think it's really important because shame doesn't get us anywhere except deeper in the hole that we're already in. And so I read this thing that said, in both anorexia and bulimia, the individual clearly becomes preoccupied by incessant thoughts revolving around body image, weight gain, food intake, leading to ritualistic methods of eating, dieting, and exercising. The common thread linking both of these disorders to OCD is the overwhelming presence of obsessions and compulsions that eventually affects the individual's daily functioning, even to the extent of becoming incapacitated.

Just as the OCD sufferer feels as though the door is not locked, despite evidence to the contrary, and is then compelled to check those locks hundreds of times in order to remove this doubt, so too the anorexic feels as though that she is overweight despite the reality the mirror portrays and she is then forever checking her stomach to make sure that she has not gained weight but she is never satisfied and therefore she is compelled to lose weight by any means necessary. With an OCD sufferer who can never achieve that just right feeling on a specific task, so too is a bulimic prevented from ever reaching his or her

goals of fullness and emptiness in an endless binge purge cycle. Going one step further, there are many instances in which patients demonstrate behaviors that at first glance appear to be indicative of an eating disorder, but actually turn out to be a result of OCD. A lot of people who struggle with eating disorder eating, not all, but a lot of them struggle with OCD. A lot of people with panic disorder and anxiety disorder and obsessive thoughts, and who just think that they're so manic and crazy,

probably just have OCD. And so with the food, I mean, we talk about it all the time, the safe foods that I have, the compulsions. Which sometimes, honestly, when I look at her, I'm thinking, when I'm eating my chocolate glazed donut, I'm thinking, and she's able to contain herself, I'm thinking, man, I wish I had a little bit of that. I know, and I look at, and she's able to contain herself. I'm thinking, man, I wish I had a little bit of that.

I know, and I look at you and say, man, I wish I had what she has, where she is just content in herself and doesn't think the way that I do about these things. It's so, it's really, I have looked at you so many times and been like, I'm so happy for my best friend that she doesn't deal with this. And I'm so happy that you're here. Because you have abs.

Stop it. No. No, it's not good. I will tell you though, I had a donut the other day and I was incredibly depressed. I don't think I'm ever gonna eat one again, I swear to you. Tell me that you were, no way. I was so depressed. Yeah, I can't eat like that anymore. The sugar literally puts me in a bad place.

Okay, I'm sorry. We went to Il Pasadio the other night and you and Carleen are like, come on. It's like a joke. It's we've got to stop laughing about our mental disorders because we've got to make life. I know you have you really have to everybody with me like they know that I really do struggle but I don't know why nobody takes this here everyone's always like come on and eat the cake I was people chase me around with bread and butter and they're like come on and I'm like this is so sick and twisted and so I ate the cake the other night and I swear I was depressed the next day I was not feel and twisted. And so I ate the cake the other night, and I swear, I was depressed the next day. I was not feeling, it was like two bites,

the sugar after like three months of not having any. I'm noticing it now. Now that Dr. Eamon said it, I can really see it now. I totally believe him in it, I really do. On the topic of OCD, this episode is brought to you by NoCD. When you're struggling with your mental health, knowing that you're not alone can mean everything. And that's why Ari and I are so open about our experiences with depression, anxiety, and OCD. And why we want to shed some light on a part of

mental health that can be hard to talk about, which is religious OCD, also known as scrupulosity OCD. People usually have a pretty good idea of what depression is or anxiety, but OCD is genuinely still really misunderstood. It isn't just about hand washing an organization, it can focus on anything that you care about. And when OCD attacks your relationship with God, it can be devastating. Religious OCD often involves unwanted, stressful, and even blasphemous thoughts that go against your beliefs. Thoughts like, did I pray correctly? I need to do it again until it's perfect.

Did I do something to offend God? Or, I had a hard time focusing in church so I feel like I've sinned. These thoughts can lead to intense guilt, shame, and compulsive behavior. But what you need to understand about religious OCD is that it's not a sign that you're a bad Christian. It's a serious but treatable condition. And with the right care, you can take its power away. That's where no CD comes in. With no CD, you can do live, face-to-face video therapy

sessions with a licensed therapist who deeply understands OCD as well as your faith and how important it is in your life. They'll help you work through these thoughts using exposure and response prevention therapy or ERP, the gold standard treatment for OCD. NoCD also accepts many major insurance plans and offers always-on support between sessions. If you think you might be struggling with religious OCD and want to learn more about therapy with NoCD, go to NoCD.com and schedule a free 15-minute call with them. That's NoCD.com to learn more and book a free 15-minute call.

Okay, so can you tell me about everything that you go through? Because yours is something that people don't understand, especially when when it's internal and it's something that people can't see you're the only one who knows how it feels and I'm sure it can make you feel so alone. Oh yeah yeah this whole topic that we're on is so personal to me this is why I'm so passionate about it because of what God did within me. But I have a little bit of a unique situation because when I first started Girls Gone Bible, I was just started to read the Bible, as you know. And so I wasn't that biblically knowledgeable, but what I did have is what God was delivering in my mind, how he was truly changing me and delivering me

and healing me. And that was not an overnight process, but that is why I am able to come on here since the very beginning and speak the way I do about Him. Because if He would have delivered and healed me without me knowing who He was, if He didn't bring me through all that, if I didn't have to go through all of that OCD to then find Him, to then work towards Him healing me, I wouldn't know Him. And so I thank God every day that I did have that OCD because He was able to shine His glory through me and deliver me.

And it has been such an incredible journey with my OCD, but since I was a little girl, I have always battled it, but I didn't know I had it. I just, I didn't even know really the thoughts. I just believed that that was me. And I would just grew up thinking, believing everything that my mind was saying. And it became that chaos and that feeling of no peace. To me, that was my normalcy.

And then when I had my mental breakdown in 2020, then it got louder and louder and louder to the point where the only way I can describe to you guys how I felt was I describe it as there was this voice in my mind just screaming and like beating me on my brain day in and day out being like, end your life, you are nothing, you're never gonna be anything, what are you doing? Just negative self-degrading talk.

And I never really heard the voices until I knew something wasn't right. And when I started analyzing those voices, I was like, there's something wrong. There's something wrong, this isn't normal. It became so loud, like to the point where I just wanted to sleep all day because I couldn't bear the thoughts, the tormenting thoughts. It truly derailed me. And so the one thing about me is I always had the spirit

of, I have always had the spirit of fear. I didn't know what authority was truly till I met you. And I know I tell this story a lot, but when I started to read things in the Bible about these people, about Mary Magdalene, and I saw that she had what they call unclean spirits tormenting her and how much I related to her. I became enamored with learning about this because it was a whole different thing than

when I was taught. I was taught that genetically, if it's passed to you, then this is what it's going to be. And it's only going to get worse and you you have to deal with it, and you have to take medication to subside it, and that's just it. And yeah, you are a little different, unfortunately, and just deal with it. So that's what I was, that's how I, that was my perception of OCD. And so when I started reading all of these stories in the Bible, I was like, hmm, these unclean spirits, these demons, this evilness, what if, and I had this like lights which went off in my brain being like, what if this is a spiritual battle that we're going through in our minds?

And so when I saw Mary Magdalene on the chosen, I thought, and I say this to you guys all the time, I thought maybe this isn't a part of my identity because I have been a victim and a slave to this since I was just a little girl thinking this is only gonna get worse for me. And so that's when the light started coming up in my eyes and then even reading stories about how Jesus

delivered and he demanded that they leave. He didn't just say, oh, it's time to go. He said, I demand you to go in Jesus' name. And the man was healed. And that was like, whoa, what is this? And he did the same thing with Mary Magdalene. And so as you started reading the Bible with me, and as I started reading about all this stuff, I thought that's when I learned what authority was. And so, in my mind, I didn't think we could come to Jesus with authority. Yeah. And when I did come to Jesus, I did come to Him on my hands and knees crying,

like a little girl asking for help, being like, Jesus, do you think you can heal my mind? Do you think you can help me? And I thank God that He didn't deliver me overnight. He didn't. Mine was a process. Mine was a whole sanctification. Mine required obedient sanctification, being in the Word constantly, and constant prayer, and just being really close to Him. But then after I asked for help, I, and we will get into this and I can't wait till you read Corinthians because one of the things that Angela really taught me was how to, I mean I think about it all the time. I think about this time when I was really, I needed help and I was just lost and I was like, Angela, can you help me? Like the thoughts are overbearing my mind and the way you taught me authority and how to get them out literally marked my life forever.

And so I stopped being afraid and I stopped being a victim. And I actually read this story the other day in the Bible and it was about Jesus and the story with the fig tree and he saw the fig tree and he said, may this fig tree never grow fruit on it again. And then the next day, because his disciples heard him, the next day, as disciples said, Rabbi, the tree has withered. And he said, in the name of Jesus, you must have faith. And whatever you ask for in prayer, believe it, and it will be yours. What I always thought faith was is always being so strong

and just have faith and be bold. No, faith is coming down on your hands and knees with nothing left in you. When I think about Jesus and how he had faith, but he was sweating blood, yet he knew what was going to happen. He knew the outcome and how it was going to be all good, but he still processed the pain. So having faith is not just being tough. It's about knowing that you are weak,

letting him be strong in your weakness, and believing, not just saying, oh my God, is this gonna happen? No, believing. Believing. Believing. That you are not your OCD. It is not your identity. And the minute I knew that OCD was not my identity,

it was not something that I always lived with because it's genetics. When I started to figure that out and started having victory over my thoughts and started combating my thoughts, the lies, with what God says, He healed me. He healed me. And that's not to say that thoughts don't come in my mind anymore because they do. But I know how to, I know how to be at peace now. I know how to look at that thought and say, that's not from God. That's not what God says.

Preach! Preach. Why don't you go teach a master class on how to acquire spiritual authority when the devil has been literally kicking your butt your entire life and how easy it is and how it can happen overnight that you just decide, I'm not gonna let him treat me this way anymore.

Cause you are literally a master. I am so grateful that God let me be a part of your journey in this. Oh, I'm glad that you were a part of it because you helped me through the whole thing. But you, with the faith, with the believing, with the, I mean, I say it all the time, Ari didn't have anyone model faith. She didn't see anyone praying her whole life. So to go out on a whim and to put herself out there and say, I don't even know what is going on, but I have faith.

What's more pleasing to God than that? Truly. Nothing. Nothing. I am obsessed. Thank you, Jesus. Thank you, Jesus, for authority. Thank you, Jesus, for 2 Corinthians 10, 5.

We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God. And we take every thought captive and we make it obedient to Christ. That's right. Ari and I. Tell the story, baby. Ari and I have, we ride, we will die on the hill. That is 2 Corinthians 10-5. My mental health, my OCD was healed from 2 Corinthians 10-5. When I first read this passage, I think

Socrates actually told me to go look at it, when I was battling these severe, horrific thoughts, this voice in my head that was chirping at me all day long, terrorizing me, wreaking havoc in my brain, Socrates said, go read this scripture and speak it over yourself. And I started speaking this over myself every single day. And in this passage, in 2 Corinthians 10-5, if I can get it really quick. So the apostle Paul is writing to the Church of Corinth. And basically, during this time, he's having to defend his ministry.

And he's addressing the spiritual warfare that we believers will be facing. And so the Church of Corinth is being inspired by all of these false teachers who are opposing and questioning the authority of Paul and basically the gospel of Jesus Christ. And so at this time, he's basically telling them that the warfare that we experience, the battle that we face, as Ari said, is not by flesh and blood. It is spiritual in nature, it is our will, our mind, our emotions, it is in the brain, in our thoughts, if the devil can capture your thought life,

he's got you. It all starts in here because this is what, unfortunately, controls everything. And I love here, we'll go through, I think we should just go through 2 Corinthians. Let's do it. Today is the day that you take captive your thoughts. Oh yeah. Jesus took captivity captive.

And you are never too far gone by the way. Absolutely not. Absolutely not. You're never too far gone. If I wasn't too far gone, if Ari wasn't too far gone, two people who were losing, we were in a battle and we were losing every single day. And it was so simple. It's so easy. Why do you think the devil is so obsessed with not letting people read God's Word?

Because it's the truth. He is... How many Christians do you know that don't read the Bible, but they believe in Jesus? That's right. Of course, because it's easy to believe in Jesus, but you have an enemy, an adversary who every single day is doing whatever he can to not let you pick this thing up. What are the odds that I went 25 years having a Bible next to my bed every single night for 25 years and I never once opened it? because there's something that is always trying to get us away from God's word because it is the truth and it is the only thing we have to fight.

And so, 2 Corinthians 10, 5, we demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the... arguments and pretensions. It's any teaching or human reasoning that puts itself against God, against His truth, or against the gospel of Jesus, sets itself up against the knowledge of God. Anything that exalts itself above God, anything that makes itself bigger or contradicts God or His word or the gospel of Jesus is something that you must tear down. Which is the thoughts that we, like think about our OCD, right? Think about a thought. We will think about it and obsess about it

and make an idol over it. Yes, yes, yes. Taking thoughts captive. Paul uses this metaphor of taking a prisoner of war captive. He uses military terms throughout all of this. And the reason he does that is because he wants us to understand that this is a battle that we need active discipline in. That's right.

It is serious. Every thought, down to the root, every single time that something comes up in your mind that is against what God has said or sounds negative or is evil or is dark. God's not dark. There is no darkness in him at all. And so any thoughts that you're having that are dark are against God. You cast them out right away, you cast it down immediately. And you make it obedient to Christ. The goal is to bring every single one of your thoughts in line with God's truth. Yeah. Everything that God thinks about is pleasing, uplifting, beautiful, lovely. This is what I pray over me and Ari all the time.

Lord, would you protect our thought life? Would you make every single thought in our mind obedient to Christ? Every thought that we have may it be positive, uplifting, beautiful, lovely, and for me and for you above all else. May all of our thoughts glorify you, Jesus. Yeah, and that's when I,

if you don't know that, you will believe those lies. You will believe those lies. That's why I'm like, any negative thought, I used to believe that and I used to act as if. And when I realized that doesn't go with God's word, I realized I'm not this way. I'm not stuck. When you think back to middle school health class, did hormone imbalance ever come up? Probably not. Hormones are a big buzzword right now. But do you even know what your hormones are and how they impact your health? I'm going to be perfectly honest with you podcast listeners. Mentional cramping, mood swings, bloating, and hormonal acne can truly ruin your week

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good. I'm a very health conscious person so using mixers is so perfect for me. Join the thousands of women who have discovered feel-good freedom through balance hormones. Head to mixers.com slash GGgb and use promo code ggb at checkout for an additional 10% off your order. Mixers rarely gives discounts so 10% off is the best offer you'll find. Remember to use my code promo code ggb for an additional 10% off. For 10% off your order head to mixers.com slash ggb and use code ggb. I love Paul so much because he's so honest and sometimes we can feel so discouraged

and feel like just helpless, but Paul says it so perfectly when he was like, although I don't wanna do what I do, evil is within me. And it says, for my inner being, I delight in God's law, but I see another law at work in me, waging war against the law of my mind. Isn't that crazy? But then at the end, he says, but I still

rejoice because I know my Jesus Christ is going to deliver me from it all. And that is something. Because I know my Jesus Christ is going to deliver me from it all. Thank you, Jesus. And that is something I love that so much because so many of us think that when we pray and we ask for something that He should just take it away right away. And that's just not sometimes how it goes. I've heard many stories of deliverance right away. But that doesn't always happen.

That wasn't my case and that wasn't your case. And I honestly thank God that He didn't deliver me right away because it taught me so much. And again, I was able to see His face through my OCD. Don't give up. Don't give up. In Galatians 6 verse 9 it says, Let's not get tired of doing good because in time we'll have a harvest if we don't give up. You have no idea Angela and I's journey,

how persistent we were every day. I just wish you guys could have been a fly on the wall at what we had to do in order for me to get healed. It wasn't just, you know, an overnight thing. Like it was every single morning learning His word. And also, what do you do when you are in fear? What do you do when you're scared? You need love.

So again, like I say this all the time, but not getting through things on your own. Having someone to work through this with, talk through this with, talk about the thoughts. What are you thinking? Don't be afraid. Find a safe place. Find someone safe that you can go to and talk to someone about this. And then again, like Angela said, whatever fearful thought that you have, take that thought and say,

does this match with God's Word? And that's what seriously freed me. That's the only thing that frees you is the renewal of the mind of the Bible. I know some of you, like she said, believe in Jesus, but it's not until you know His Word until you'll be free. I can't even tell you what my inner dialogue sounded like. And then now in my journey, I'm like, okay, so he says that because one of my biggest things was I'm never gonna make it, I'm always dwelling about the past.

What am I gonna do with my purpose? I'm never gonna be healed. I'm always dwelling about the past. What am I gonna do with my purpose? I'm never gonna be healed. And what does he say? He says, by my stripes, you are healed. He says that we worry about, most of us worry about what we're gonna do in our life with our purpose. But he says, those who love me,

I work all things together for your good. When we sit there and we talk about, no one ever talks about the OCD of a breakup, right? When we're so heartbroken and we are sitting there being like, oh my gosh, what am I gonna do? He says, don't look back, I am creating something new. Fear not, fear not. And another thing that I love about that scripture that

I read earlier about how when he says, when you ask for something in prayer, believe it, say it and believe it. And then in the next sentence, he says, but first, whoever you are still holding resentment to, forgive them and then your father from up above will forgive you. And so I know that so much OCD is caused from a breakup. The grief, the heartbreak, the thinking of what I could have done, what could I have done more, was it my fault? And you spend months, some people even spend years, in hell, in hell in their mind. Because not only are you dwelling, but you lost that person

and you can't understand why and it's really confusing. And so I want to encourage you guys to do something for me. When you start feeling that resentment or wondering or thinking or obsessing over that person. I want you to immediately start praying for them. I'm not kidding. If you guys can write this down, please start doing this for me. And then write if it's helped you.

Because this is going to free your mind of bondage. Because when he says that I will forgive you, not only does he forgive you, but it clears your mind and it sets you free. So immediately when you guys start thinking, the thoughts start ruminating, saying, no, no, no, no, no, I pray and just start praying and speak love, speak love to that person and pray for them.

And I'm telling you, it will set you free. Nothing will set you free more than praying for someone. Bless them. And if you hate them so much that you don't know what to say, say, Lord, I bless them. Lord, I love them. Lord, give them major blessing. Just keep blessing them.

And that removes that resentment from your heart. I'm so happy you brought up relationships, because relationship OCD is something I wanted to talk about because it's so common for people OCD can destroy relationships as well I've seen OCD come up in relationships in the form of you can have very paranoid thoughts You think your spouse is cheating you think they're doing this you think they don't love you you think

People and I'm just going to say it, I have seen so many stories about people ruminating on their partner's ex. It happens all the time. People can become obsessed with the ex of their person or even the new girlfriend or boyfriend of the person. I mean, there are so many things. Relationship OCD is one of the most common things that happens. And we just want to free you guys today in understanding that these

thoughts are not something that you need to be submitted to. These are things that through prayer, by taking everything to prayer, getting to the root of it, I want you to know that a stronghold is formed when you meditate on a lie and then you accept it. That's how a stronghold is formed. Any sort of stronghold. You meditate on it, you think about it too much, and then you accept it. When you passively engage in a lie, you're accepting it. Even like the reason why Paul talks about in 2 Corinthians 10, 5 in such a military disciplined way is because he wants us to understand how serious it is and how you have to get to Things at the root of the problem you cast it down you refuse it

Immediately you don't engage. That's what I If I'm being completely honest you guys going from someone who had no control over my mind No control over my thought life. I had I was literally ruled by whatever was going on in here to now because of my spiritual discipline and because of how seriously I take this, I have the ability, not all the time obviously, but in so many cases, I have control through the blood of Jesus to control what is happening in my mind. If I don't like something, I'm not believing it, period. And I don't engage in it, and I don't even think about it for

another second. But there are times where I just let something go on a couple times because I'm not taking it seriously. And then all of a sudden I'm like, how did I get here? It's this massive deal in my mind. But when I get to things at the root, it changes things for me. And I want you guys to know that without the Word of God, you do not have a fighting chance in this battle. You need an incredible depth of knowledge in God's Word. You need to be educated. The only thing that you can fight this with is through prayer and scripture.

How can you fight with scripture when you don't know it? I need you to read the Bible. I need you to be in this. Jesus used scripture to fight Satan. We know this story about when Jesus was in the wilderness, Satan comes to tempt him three different times. Three times Jesus uses scripture to resist the devil. And Satan himself literally perverts scripture to use it against Jesus. He quoted Psalm 91. But I love this so much. He left out the last part.

You shall trample over lions and cobras. It's convenient Satan left it out because the next verse said, oops, actually, you're going to crush my head. So Satan will use scripture. You must also use scripture. That's right. That's right. And I just want to say one last thing. Jesus has the final word. He has the final word. The word no is the most powerful thing that you can say. When you have a thought that you don't like, that doesn't feel good, all you need to say is no. No, I don't like it, I don't

agree with it, I'm not accepting it, that's not who I am, I do not identify with that, I'm not taking that on as myself. Jesus said no enough times to Satan that he had to go and then come back at an opportune time. Don't forget that he will come back eventually. But in the moment when you say no enough, heaven, hell, and earth must recognize it, and it does something. So when you get these thoughts, I had someone, I heard someone say it like this. I have a friend who works with somebody,

and every single time this friend, he saw over a couple of weeks that this guy would randomly go, and eventually he was like, why do you do that randomly? Like, why do you just, and he said, every time that I get a thought I don't like, I say, to hell with you. And he like throws it to hell. I know these things like sound silly,

but it is that serious. We are in a 24 hour, forever spiritual battle where it all starts up here. So if it all starts up here, why don't we do everything in our power to make sure it's starts up here. So if it all starts up here, why don't we do everything in our power to make sure it's healthy up here? You have more control than you think. You are not your thoughts. You don't have to believe them.

Whatever is going on up here that you don't like, take authority against it. Say, in Jesus' name, no, I don't believe you. That's all you have to do. It is so much easier than we think. And the issue is, it's just hard to get it. It's hard much easier than we think and the issue is it's just hard to get it It's hard to hear it. It's hard to receive it Yeah, but the devil knows how easy it is and that's why he wants us to stay away from the truth as much as he can Yeah, I it's so funny that I love that you say that because I

I I was having like a lot of intrusive thoughts last week Yeah, and I got on my hands and knees, and you know what I do? I literally pretend like I'm taking the thought out. Love it, get out! And I was on my hands and knees, and I was like, absolutely not, get out in Jesus' name and go back to hell. My girlfriend actually, I think you had said this

in an earlier episode, and it freed her, and she says that every single time the enemy tries to get out of her head, and it's a simple one, and all it is is, get out of here, devil. Get out of here, devil. And that's literally, there's nothing that frees you more, get out of here, devil. And he really does flee. It really does flee. It really does go. Yeah, one of my favorite scriptures is obey my commandments and you will know the truth and the truth will set you free.

Thank you, Jesus. What that means is when you read in the Bible about this peace, this peace that he gives you that surpasses all understanding, when you learn and you understand and you obey His commandments, I kept reading that and I was like, okay, what is this peace? If I obey His commandments, I'll be free? Well, what do I have to lose then? I might as well try this thing because I have no peace in my heart. Right. And when I started reading this Bible and I started obeying his

commandments, not just one, not just two, but really walking in the will of God, and I say this all the time, but I will say this every episode because that's truly what set my mind free. Not living of the world. Guys, why do you think more than ever we're all depressed? We're all living in chaos. It's just starting as little kids because there's social media, there's celebrities telling us that we should do this and that glorifying Satan with music about sex and money and drugs and where in every TV station you turn to, it's all negativity. It's all with the opposite of what God teaches. So we are all depressed. Our minds won't stop going. We are being programmed to believe these lies in today's culture. So we are all not feeling good.

Our minds and hearts are not at ease because we are not following the word of God. And maybe, just maybe, if we all started following what He says, I guarantee you the rate of OCD and obsessive compulsive, whatever it is, would go down dramatically. I understand that sometimes it's in your genes and sometimes you can't help it. And some of you that are listening right now are like, man, should I be on this medication? Should I be ashamed of being on this medication? No, that was actually very courageous of you that you did take that step.

Even though that is not going to fully heal you, you still said, you know what, my mind won't stop. I need help. And you were courageous enough to get met on medicine. So then you could take the next step to chasing Jesus. So we are here to tell you that we are so proud of you for that. I love in Psalm 107 verse 20, he said, he sent out his word and healed them, snatching them from the door of death. You are talking to someone who has generations of

generations of OCD, obsessive and compulsive, who had never had a moment of peace since I was a little girl. And now, though I have thoughts, I am living in a supernatural peace that is only from the grace of our Jesus Christ. And I know that I am no different from you guys. And you guys can get there too. This is why we come on here every single week. And we are so passionate about Jesus because we know what he did for our mental health and we know how much you guys are struggling and suffering. And we are here to tell you, you can be delivered too and you will be delivered too.

But we are giving you the code, we've cracked the code on how to be delivered and how to be healed. And He will do that for you too. And that might come with some pain and that might come with some time and that might come with some not even knowing how you're going to get through the next door, but He will. But I'm telling you guys, to get through the next door, but He will. But I'm telling you guys, it's through the Word of God and being obedient. Obedience is the key. Yeah. And I want to speak to something that you said earlier.

You talked about Ari was speaking to compromising and sin and so many things that we deal with are sent at us by the devil. But I just want to say so many things that we experience and you guys know this and it's really important that we take accountability. So many things that we deal with are because of compromises that we make. You give the enemy an inch, he takes a mile. You open the door, he moves in. So much of what I struggled with was generational and it is passed down, and it is genetic, and I am a victim to it, and I feel sorry for myself

because I didn't ask for these things, I didn't ask for my brain to be wired that way, but so much of the chaos that I was living with was because of the way that I was living, and so much of that was cleared up by my obedience. A lot of it was cleared up by repenting for things that were in my life. And there's every time that you let sin in, you open the door. Every time you repent, you shut that door. And so that is what repentance is to me. Repentance

is everything to me. When I feel like my life is just up in flames, I always get down with God and I say, Jesus, what is it, what door did I open, what have I done, where can I repent, bring it to my mind, bring it to my remembrance and let me repent. And when you ask him that, it's so funny, God is so funny, he will literally bring up like five different things that you need to repent for.

And so that is so much of what has changed my mental health and being able to take those thoughts captive. Authority is what we have talked about this whole time. If you want authority, authority begins at obedience. Authority begins in the will of God. God's not going to give you authority, and it's not because he's a bad God, but it's just your authority, the power comes from Jesus. If you want to gain control over your life and your thought life, you have to spend time with Jesus. If you want to gain control over your life and your thought life, you have to spend time with Jesus. Every single thing that we do begins in the secret place.

And if your mind is so, so bad, and you're dealing with horrific OCD, anxiety, mental health, whatever it is, then you need to take extra precaution. And you need to be in the Bible, you need to be in quiet time for hours. And I mean that. And I mean you put on worship and you sit there and you give God everything and you disconnect from your phone, from the computer, from your friends, from the world and say, Jesus, I'm in dire need of your spirit right now. The power that you're looking for only comes from the secret place with Jesus. Authority only comes from the secret place and in your obedience.

I've said it before, I'll say it again, if you want more authority, be more obedient. The little compromises that you make, make a difference. It means a lot. Every single time in my life that I make, I'm at this point with God where He won't even let me make the smallest compromises. And when I do, because I do, everybody does,

when I do, I feel it and I see it and I know it. And it gives me the strength and the endurance to be like, it's not worth it. It's not worth losing control. My spiritual discipline is so good. Why am I gonna give the enemy even a foothold in my life right now? And that makes you more bold, doesn't it?

Totally. When you are walking in the will and you are just so in that close proximity with God, don't you feel... That's what... If you want to know how to get authority and to feel bold, that's it. When I'm living in sin, living of the world, I don't feel good. I don't feel strong. No wonder why I didn't feel strong. I'm living the ways of the world, but when I started to really obey His commandments, that's what made me feel so strong and bold and that I could go to the throne and be bold and say, no, no, no, no, I'm doing the right thing. I'm living, walking in God's will, get out.

Yes, get out. And so I want you guys to stop. I want you guys to stop living in fear. I know that life is really hard. I know what struggle feels like. I know what suffering feels like. But it is time that we rid of the fear and the guilt and the shame and get out of victim mode and say, no, no, no, I have authority over my mind. I am not going to stop because I know, I don't think, I know Jesus is going to heal me and I know He's with me and I know

He's for me and I know He loves me and He's going to help me and walk through this thing with me and He's going to deliver me and everything's going to be okay. And also I want to say one more thing. Michael Cooliano said the greatest thing one time. I heard him because he was talking about, because we've talked about the devil and whatever, like I want you guys to know, while you have to take it seriously, you also don't give the devil more power than he has

because he has none unless you give it to him. And Michael Cooliano said the best thing, he said, I only look at the devil long enough to get him in my scope and then shoot him dead and then I say bye. That's all you need to do with him. Well we started, what I love about you and I now and what before we would, he would have, well not you,

but for me when I started my journey, he would literally like deteriorate my mind and now we will literally be like, what is that thought? And we will laugh at it. Analyze, I love that, analyze your thoughts. Become analytical, become introspective. This is where therapy really helps, where you start to analyze yourself

and be like, what is that? Use it as a game. Be like, okay, today I'm gonna see the weird thoughts or whatever thoughts that come into my mind, I'm gonna analyze it. Okay, I had this thought that this person is this and this and that. Is this really true?

Like, just become analytical. And before we go off, I want to say one more thing because we did get a lot of questions and I think we answered most of them. People asked what you do with compulsions. And I just want to give one piece of advice. People who struggle with the compulsive side of OCD where you have to have these rituals and do all these things and people have to check the door a thousand times and it's really debilitating. What I've done so much research on it and what I've really come to the conclusion is

that you have to drop to your knees, cry out to Jesus in prayer, and also you deny the desire. Whatever is your desire, like for me, honestly, I've even been working with it with a little bit in food. My desire right now is to make the same protein shake that I'm obsessed with right now, that I make it three times a day. I forced myself yesterday to go eat something different. You know what I mean?

And it seems innocent, but I'm denying the desire to be comfortable in this compulsion. And so for you, as painful as it is, because when you have a compulsion, what you're trying to do is actually alleviate the anxiety that you're feeling. And so it feels like it's going to give you more anxiety, but the only way to break out of it is to deny yourself the desire. And that's what we have to do with most things. If you have never received Jesus before, today is such a beautiful day to take control over your mind, to take control over your thoughts. I was a goner before Jesus. I want you guys to understand that if it weren't for Jesus, I don't know where I would be, but it certainly wouldn't be good. My mind, I was losing. There

was a battle and I would have never won without the power given to me by Jesus. There is a power and a grace. Grace means unmerited favor. You get that grace when you receive Jesus. And that grace carries you through difficult situations. And that grace is what literally got me through the hardest time of my life when Jesus was radically healing my mental health. Jesus is Jehovah Rapha.

He is the God who heals. And He wants to heal you today. Your healing is on the other side of this prayer. So I invite you today to receive the free gift of salvation. Beautiful, beautiful Jesus did what only He could do. God sent His one and only Son to die on a cross for the forgiveness of our sins. The Lamb of God who takes away the sins of the world. He loves you so much that He died on the cross thinking of you individually, specifically, knowing that you are going to go through what you are going through right now and He wants to heal you. You guys would pray with me. Dear Lord Jesus, I know that I'm a sinner

and I ask for your forgiveness. I believe you died for my sins and rose from the dead. I turn from my sins and invite you to come into my heart and life. I wanna trust you and follow you as my Lord and savior. Baptize me in your Holy Spirit, in Jesus' name, amen. We're so happy, we love you guys so much. Thank you guys for everything. Thank you for being our family.

Thank you for being our people. We love you so much. We love you guys so much. And if you haven't gotten baptized, you need to. Yes, go get baptized. Please. May the Lord bless you and keep you. May he make his face to shine upon you

and be gracious to you. May He turn His face towards you and give you peace. We love you so much. We love you so much. you