Girls Gone Bible - Sobriety | Girls Gone Bible

Episode Date: July 14, 2023

Your girls are back to put everything on the table in regards to drugs and alcohol. Angela dives into her journey with sobriety and the girls have an honest conversation about substance abuse, addiction, and how society has normalized drugs and alcohol. We come from a place of absolutely no judgement to meet you guys wherever you may be in your journey. Our main goal is to make you aware that while we may look to 100 different things to numb our pain, there is only one place we will find true relief. Jesus. He is our medicine, our comfort, our light in the darkness. He is truly the only thing that will ever satisfy. "For He satisfies the longing soul, and the hungry soul He fills with good things." Psalm 107:9 We love you. -Ang & Ari if you’d like to support Girls Gone Bible 🙏🏻🕊️🤍 Paypal- https://www.paypal.me/girlsgonebibleinfo Venmo- https://www.venmo.com/u/girlsgonebible https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/girlsgonebiblepod/support

Hi, GGB gang. This is Anjanari, and we have a question for you guys. Do you want to make a podcast? Spotify's got a platform that lets you make one so easily, and then you can distribute it everywhere and even earn money, all in one place for free. It's called Spotify for Podcasters, and here's how it works. Spotify for Podcasters lets you record and edit podcasts right from your phone or computer,

so no matter what your setup's like, whether you're at home or in the studio, you can start creating today. Then you can distribute your podcast to Spotify and everywhere else podcasts are heard. With Spotify for Podcasters, you can earn money in a variety of ways, including ads and podcast subscriptions. And best of all, it's totally free with no catch ever since we discovered spotify for podcasters you guys it has changed the game i mean we're able to do video podcasts without just having to do audio podcasts and we're able to do q and a's and polls at the end and it has just brought us so close to you guys and really created a community feel so we really recommend that you give it a try download the spotify for podcasters app or go to www.spotify.com slash podcasters to

get started we love you god bless you hi besties god bless you jesus be with you welcome to another episode of girls gone bible before Before we start, I have a question. What? Which woman in the Bible do you think you're most like? I know. You're like the woman at the well. She had five husbands. I was just kidding. No, I'm like Mary Magdalene. No, you're like Mary Magdalene. Who are you like? Jezebel? Hey. You got her. No, you know that's a really sore spot after this morning.

No, we had some spiritual warfare this morning. Listen to this. So we wake up this morning. I say our hours last night and we wake up being tagged multiple times. We don't even like read the comments we'll get into that another time but like we barely we try not to read stuff because sometimes it's a little bit discouraging but we wake up to this video that this guy made and it was like calling us Jezebels and he was going hard about us for a second and typically we can try and laugh at it but for some reason this morning this morning we got in our heads a little bit

and we were just overthinking a little bit. And we were both like trying to not say what we were feeling and being like, no, it's fine. I don't care. I don't care. And then we opened Jesus' calling and read what we read. I couldn't believe it because he always comes through. Always. It says,

Relax in my peaceful presence. Do not bring performance pressures into our sacred space of communion. When you are with someone you trust completely, you feel free to be yourself. This is the one of the joys of true friendship. Though I am lord of lords and king of kings, I also desire to be your intimate friend. When you are tense or pretentious in our relationship, I feel hurt.

I know the worst about you, but I also see the best in you. I long for you to trust me enough to be fully yourself with me. When you are real with me, I am able to bring out the best in you, the very gifts I had planted in your soul. Relax and enjoy our friendship. I couldn't believe when you read that. We both started crying. We both started crying. I was like, I go, ah.

Like, he's so right. He's so right. Anyways, guys, what's up? We love you so much. Should we mention the ranking on Spotify? Or is that stupid? Yeah. Should we mention the ranking on Spotify? Or is that stupid? Yeah, so we saw this morning. No, we saw last night that we're top 10 in the United States right now

for religious podcasts. On religious and spiritual podcasts on Spotify. And I literally just start dying laughing. I go, why? How? We don't even have an intro song. We don't even have, like, we don't even, we don't even, like that just goes to show that we truly from the bottom of our hearts, like had no idea that this was going to be anything.

And we love you guys so much. Every single person who watches and says nice things like you don't know how helpful it is in our hearts. So God bless you. What are we talking about today one two three sobriety so um so first we have a lot to talk about about sobriety um we talked about mental health the last time and they kind of go a little bit hand in hand it's you know a heavy topic again but i'm sober a Ari's not, but you know, she has her own stance on drugs, alcohol, substances, sobriety. I have a clearly a pretty

hard stance about it. Um, but also I come from a place of completely understanding wherever you might be in your walk with it. Cause trust me, I've been there wherever you were. Trust me. Um, there wherever you were trust me um i think we want to read from romans 5 today before we start romans 5 is kind of about like i love romans is my favorite book in the bible but romans chapter 5 is kind of about like the great benefits that we get from being like in communion with god um that we get from being like in communion with God. He, we have peace with him. Like even though we are sinners, even though we mess up and we have like all the reason in the world

to not live in perfect peace, we're able to access that through our relationship with Jesus. And it's just so cool and I love him. All right. It's so cool. So Romans chapter five, faith triumphs in trouble.

Therefore, having been justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom also we have access by faith into this grace in which we stand and rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. And not only that, but we also glory in tribulations,

which means sufferings and hard times knowing that tribulation produces perseverance and perseverance character and character hope now hope does not disappoint because the love of God has been poured out into our hearts by the Holy Spirit who was given to us we're gonna go a little bit to Christ in our place. Verse six, for when we were still without strength in due time, Christ died for the ungodly. For scarcely for a righteous man will one die, yet perhaps for a good man someone would even dare to die. But God demonstrates his own love toward us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us. Much more than having now been justified by his blood, we shall be saved from wrath through him. For if when we were enemies,

we were reconciled to God through the death of his son. Much more having been reconciled, we shall be saved by his life. And I want to go to death in Adam, life to Moses, even over to those who had not sinned according to the likeness of the transgression of Adam, who is a type of him who is to come. So you have to remember that like you because we are born after Adam in his bloodline. We are sinners from birth as babies. Even if you've never actually sinned, you're still a sinner. And that's why I thank you jesus but the free gift is not like the offense for if by the one man's offense many died much more by the grace of god and the gift by grace of the one man jesus christ abounded to many and the gift is not like that which came through the one who sinned. For the judgment which came from one offense resulted in condemnation, but the free gift

which came from many offenses resulted in justification. We are justified through Jesus. For if by the one man's offense death reigned through the one, much more those who receive abundance of grace and of the gift of righteousness will reign in life through the one Jesus Christ. So just remember this, grace abounded much more. Sobriety, alcohol, addiction, drugs, like it is such a messy thing. But just remember the grace that we've been given by God through your mess, through the issues, through the addiction, and through the wrestle that you might be having with stuff like this.

So where should we start? I think we should get right into your sobriety. I know that you've touched a lot upon it, but I think going a little bit deeper will help a lot of people. Yeah. Your story is extremely beautiful. And seeing where you are now in your life, I think it's just incredible. Yeah. Thanks, babe.

Yeah. I think we should start by saying that before I get into how hard it was, where I am now, like, sobriety is the easiest thing of my life. It's not even a question in my life so I just want to say that like you can get to a place where um it could be so you're in such agreement with sobriety that it can be easy for you and not and not be something that's like so scary and daunting like I have to be sober for my whole life for the rest of my life like I think that's what's really discouraging to people with it is because it just sounds so much and so heavy um but you get used to everything so let's

start with I used to work bottle service um I was I started you know cat drinking with friends I when I was in high school that's where it started I wouldn't say I had a problem but I was a big drinker I loved it like I never needed drugs I never needed weed like nothing like alcohol was my kryptonite I loved it I love tequila um did you realize that when you started working in the um bottle service industry i knew since i was young that like i really liked alcohol yeah and i knew i didn't know that it was a problem but i i could tell that i liked it more more than some of my friends did but i was never doing especially back then i was never doing worse than what the people around me were that's why it's so careful uh so important to be careful

who you're surrounded by because you will become like them and if everyone else is acting a certain way you're gonna think it's okay to act that way um but it was when I started working bottle service is that it became like so engraved like in my life like I it was around it five nights a week so I was drinking five nights a week um my hangover started to get so bad and it's I started to so that's also why I started experiencing so much anxiety like my hangovers you know anxiety like I was having do you get hangover anxiety um when even if I have a glass of especially if you're going through something yeah that's when you really shouldn't even have a glass of wine and it's so fun yeah and society tells you like that's the time where you should drink to like get over it but it's just the absolute worst um

yeah i just because i've never really noticed that and i've never i don't think i i've never seen you hung over have i no because i don't get drunk you don't drink yeah or you drink but like you don't get drunk ever I've never seen her drunk ever um we always act like we're drunk like we literally remember we were out one night and they were like how drunk are you guys I'm like we're drunk on life literally so sober I know because and and I wasn't always like that so I um so I started having such bad hangover anxiety that like I someone had said to me one time well you know the best way to get over a hangover right I said what and they said you just start drinking again I was done from that moment I was like in the morning work I mean I well yeah if you start getting well if you start getting drunk again like

yeah you're not gonna feel your hangover you feel more sick it doesn't so I never felt like sick I felt anxious and it would take the edge off from the hangover anxiety I think there are some people who I know are like I'll throw up at the thought of that and then there are some people who are like that's what I need. That's how a lot of people become alcoholics is they start like, that's how they go on benders because they feel so awful from the night before they start drinking again. And that's what happened to me.

I was like, this is my cure. So if I was hungover at all, I'll just have a little drink the next day. And that turned into becoming emotionally dependent on it and physically dependent on it and so I like couldn't I got to a point and it's it's so weird to talk about because like nobody my mom will tell you if you ask her she'll be like I had no idea she had no idea that I had a problem oh there's only one person that knew I had a problem and it was my boyfriend at the time because we like he was the closest person to me he saw everything every single one of my friends told me don't stop drinking that's so weird it's so excessive like take a month off like

and I was like no guys I don't feel good like this is I really gotta are they still your friends no who's your friend yeah um no that that actually i that's another thing too you you really start to um you see who your real friends are not in a bad way at all but you realize like oh i have literally nothing in common with these people yeah not in a bad way there's nothing you know wrong it's just what are we gonna do like they're drinking and i'm not like well you know wrong it's just what are we gonna do like they're drinking and i'm not like well you know why are you laughing because i'm thinking i know what you're thinking because you dwell and you're like no it's not in a bad way like if you're watching no but it really is oh i thought you were saying because you're my only friend because you want to be my only friend um so i where was i um you were saying thank god we're not having a heart attack on the days we're

filming anymore i feel so much better me too all right go ahead so keep going sorry and then um so then i started so it was really only me that knew how bad it really was i mean i couldn't go my body so there's something called like an allergy to alcohol and they they talk about it in like the 12-step programs that like some people like they just their body processes it differently like they have an allergy to it you can have a drink and you can have two sips and be like i don't even want this anymore yeah there's no way on planet earth that i could have a whole drink in front of me and not finish it.

Wow. You know? There's no way that we can go out for a couple and I'm like not wanting more after two. Yeah. You know, it's like one is too many and 12 is not enough. And so that's just the way my brain works. And it took me, I didn't know that at first.

I didn't know. I knew there was an at first I didn't know I knew there was an issue because I knew I was like why is it that all my friends want to go like you know get breakfast the next day and I want to keep drinking um and it's not that I was ever sloppy it's not that I was ever too much like that's why I got away with it for so long I mean I I would say it was really bad I think it started to get kind of bad where I was excessively like drinking often for about two years I think maybe when I was like 21 and then I got sober when I was 23 and then about like the last six months it was like I was

struggling to function I was not well you could see it on me I was not looking I was not you know I was yeah so when you hit your rock bottom went like how did that all happen to where you were like okay I'm gonna get sober this is so personal and I okay mean, so because there is a story about like the day that I stopped drinking, it's just so I it was Thanksgiving 2009. No. Yeah. 2019. I look at 2019. Even the name of it is like so dark because that was the darkest period of my whole life. I was literally like not even a human i was so consumed by alcohol like talk about demonic oppression i was bound to alcohol like i it was it's weird it's really scary yeah um it's the only thing that that's why like your relationships and stuff suffer because it's all it consumes you it's like all you think about addiction is the scare it's the

worst thing in the world um it has you acting in ways that you would never otherwise act it completely changes who you are and like yeah it's it's it's rough but so thanksgiving 2019 i um i was in a relationship and i mean this guy like, he's like a guardian angel for me. And literally he's one, he's still one of my good friends. He, uh, we were going to his family's house for Thanksgiving and I knew that they didn't drink. So there was going to be no alcohol at this Thanksgiving family party. So I brought like a little thing of tequila in my bag in my purse. And before then I had already tried doing the like, you know, only have to or only drink beer or wine or like, you know, like I feel like people who are struggling with alcohol do

those things to try and slow it down, but it't actually work it's like all or nothing unless you can but a lot of time you can't i know i couldn't um it didn't matter what i was drinking i was gonna drink everything that was there whatever um and then so it's i bring tequila in my purse to thanksgiving and like i guess i thought i was being like slick about it, going to the bathroom. My ex Jake is like, he's so smart. He was like, hi, what are you going to the bathroom for? And I was like, I don't know. And eventually he like followed me at one point and he just opens my bag.

And I'm like, what are you doing? And he's like, like this, like, is this alcohol? And I go, no. And he's like, yeah, it is. It was I go, no. And he's like, yeah, it is. Was it in a water bottle? It was in a water bottle. Like, it was so, so stupid. And that day, so we were with his family. It was like, it was insane.

It was wild. I mean, he's such a good, such a great person. He was just very quiet about it. He's like, you know, we'll talk. Did you end up taking a swig of it? No, he took it from me. He took it? He took it.

And then he was like, when we got home that night, and this is a guy who literally loved me so much, and he looked me dead in my eyes. And this is how God, if he trusts you like he'll use people to get through you and I know he that's how he speaks to me all the times through the people that I he knows love me and have my best interest he looks me in the eyes and goes I'm done he's like if you don't stop right now today we're done I'm done I don't care how much I love you I can't watch you do this and it changed me forever wow that was the last time I was I remember I was wearing these like polka dot pajamas I had

mascara down my face I literally go what if I'm not cute anymore what if I'm not fun who am I and I Jen and he literally looks at me and goes you're're going to be a lot cuter, but you're not drinking. But these are the musicians. A lot of the time, they don't want to stop drinking or get sober because they think that their lyrics aren't going to be as good or their songs. They're not going to have the inspiration. Comedians don't want to get sober because they think they're not going to be funny anymore. It happens a lot. I genuinely thought that I was cuter that way than I would be like, it's just the things that the enemy does to try and convince you

that what you're doing is right. And it's not. Yeah. So what do you, so after that day, what was the process to sobriety? Like what were the steps that you had to take in order to never look back? Yeah. So that night. So I just want to say that like I didn't join any type of program. I didn't go to AA. I didn't go to AA. I didn't do I didn't do therapy.

I didn't do anything. That's why I know it was me and Jesus. Like he had been pursuing me before that. I could tell because I started being like interested and listening to worship music and stuff like that like it was a gradual process and and my soccer my pastor would pray for me every single day and I would pray for myself whatever I'd go to church every day and sit there and be like can you I can you heal me from this because it's not it's not right and then so after that day I didn't say that I was to be sober for the rest of my life. I said that, like, I was going to take a break for a month. That's what I said.

I said, I'll stop for a month and see and just see whatever the first few days. And we had a question, right, that said, have you ever had withdrawals? Yes. Yeah? Did you have withdrawals? The answer is yeah. Alcohol withdrawals, if you've never experienced something like it, are so, I don't even know how to explain it. I wish I had, like, journaled during that time because I'm so far from it that I almost, I wish that I could remember that pain to just even implement it even more that, like, don't ever even think about it. But I was having withdrawals withdrawals are like you I mean they're so serious that you can have a seizure from withdrawals it's really bad um I was I thought I was gonna die I was in bed for days I felt like I was gonna die I was sweating I was scared I was anxious I was sweating. I was scared. I was anxious. I was having chills. I was having, you know, it was, do you know withdrawals? Oh, absolutely.

No, I've never had it, but I grew up watching it. So yeah, it's brutal. It's, yeah. You can, yeah. Go ahead. No, you can die from it, especially with the drugs and stuff. Yeah, I know. And like Xanax withdrawals that you can really really get messed up from um so yeah withdrawals were awful that should be enough to

to help you see that you should never go back to something especially if you've beat it the first time it's good how many days were your withdrawals before you got to the other side of that? I mean, the bad withdrawals were for like. Four days, three, four days, progressively better each day. But I will say, like, I was not right. I was in a fog for almost a year. Wow. I didn't I was in survival mode. I was having all those things that we talked about last time like the derealization depersonalization um I was in I was like a shell of a person I was not myself I couldn't focus on anything I do you feel like you put your identity into alcohol like that was kind of your identity you were you know more fun you had more of a personality that's what you had in your head when you would go out and drink like that's I know that's what a lot of

people do they feel like they can't be sociable if they don't have some alcohol in their system a hundred percent that's how it got towards the end where I felt like I I did so it's so funny that you say that because I have been a very social person my whole life when i started drinking heavily i started saying that like i'm such an introvert i can't be social unless i have alcohol it wasn't true at all crazy i know like you are the most outgoing person i've ever met i'm telling you it was just so it's just all lies lies lies lies yeah the enemy puts in your head and you come into agreement and then you believe them it's ridiculous yeah i i i wouldn't say that like i had because some people drink oh like solely because they want to be social i had like a physical dependency on it like it could have just been me and the

alcohol and it didn't matter like i had the spirit of addiction that just i that's what I wanted you know yeah um but yeah so it took it took a while and then I mean it's truly only by the grace of God I swear because I I'm I I the first month especially I didn't know if I was gonna it was so rocky that every day I was just like as long as I stay today not drinking because I don't know what's gonna happen tomorrow and you like basically every day was rocky but I I like that you didn't say, oh, I'm never drinking again. That's it. Yeah. I feel like those small little victories of being like today I'm going to do my best and that's all I can do today because I think that's important for people to know, like do your best in that day. Don't worry about tomorrow, the past or the future. I think that's a great point that you made there that's so true

yeah yeah because it's it's too daunting to be like I from right now to the rest of my life I'm gonna be sober if I said that in the beginning I would have lost my mind I wouldn't have done it yeah I was just like today and then so I said okay I'll go a month and then you instantly start to see the benefits of not drinking when you're not drinking. Like it's so monumental and it's so quick too that I was just like, even after a month, I was like, and I'm like, not only did I feel better, like, I mean, you can't even compare it. I, my energy levels, my anxiety subsided. Um, my sleep was so much better i had insomnia before no i didn't i was treating my body like crap like i did not and this is another thing too about how do i go about this like

mental health and and the way that we feel we're like we'll just immediately be like i have this and this is just what i have it's it's uh it's an imbalance and it's how I'm supposed to be so I need to take this and this yeah what are you doing in your life and this is something that I had to ask myself what are you doing in your life that could be contributing to how you're feeling what are you eating what are you drinking what are you watching if you're drinking alcohol every day I'm sorry to tell you that's probably why you're so anxious that's probably why you're depressed yeah and i'm not saying that there's no way you have any other issue but like you need to eliminate every factor first before deciding that you have this thing and that that's

the way it is and and you you just have to deal with it yeah you know i i felt so much better and honestly for vanity reasons i was like you i you look so much that's enough to keep me sober because it's just like you it destroys you and you wear it on your face absolutely like and you wear it on your body and it's not just about because you look prettier come on like you you you it really it shows like you can tell that glow from not using substances is so worth it. Absolutely. And this is another thing, too, about like this is another thing that I noticed because, you know, how when we're kids. Everything in life is like so fun and so beautiful and magical. And as you get older, we say that that starts to go away a little bit.

It starts to diminish that the beauty of life, the magic of life. I'm telling you, I experience natural euphoria on a daily basis because I'm not being artificially stimulated by anything. Like I can be going to the grocery store on a Tuesday morning truly as if I'm like on drugs because I'm so elated by life, by being alive. And like those, and I can say that because I did come to a place where I, nothing was fun for me. Nothing was fun. I wasn for me. Nothing was fun.

I wasn't happy. Everything was boring. People were boring. I didn't enjoy anything unless I was drinking. Now I could literally sit in the corner twiddling my thumbs and have the time of my life. And it's truly because I don't drink. Yeah, it's true. Wow.

It's worth it. It's really, really worth it. Yeah. And what Angie said, too, about, you know, it's not even about just drinking. I mean, anything that can cloud your judgment or ability to make decisions, you're under the influence. Ever since social media came out, there's more suicide. The suicide ratings went up more than ever. So, you know, or if you're in a relationship and you put your value in them, you're under the influence.

Yeah. You know? Wow, that's so true. So you have to be really careful. With social media, I feel like, think about influencers. Like, we look at them and we want to wear what they're wearing and do what they're doing. Yeah. So we're under the influence. So we really have to be careful with all that. That is so, that is so, so true. I know it's not even drugs and

alcohol. It's what, what influence are you under? Yeah. And go ahead. Well, I was going to say that's why also it's so important. If you're in a space right now where I know for a lot of women, even men, like they're alone right now. They're in a season of loneliness. And it's like God would never put you in a position where you're not supposed to be in. So if you're in a season of loneliness and you're you have no one be thankful for that he's putting you there because he's equipping you to be on your own so that when you are in a relationship you won't be clouded with judge you won't be clouded with being under the influence and you can actually be healthy

yeah so true and clear and clear wow wow wow And like so much of your own person that being influenced by somebody else won't affect that because you're so solid in who you are. Yeah. I love that you say that about influence because you know how we always talk about how like the enemy doesn't have power. He doesn't have power. And people are like, well, if he doesn't have power, then how does he do things? And I think he doesn't have power, but he has influence. He's able to influence our thoughts. He's able to throw darts and throw arrows and plant seeds and all that.

But the thing about the enemy is that the only time he has power is when the enemy meets our flesh and we give him that power. Otherwise, he doesn't. He does half the work and the only reason that it can come to fruition, whatever he wants, is when we give him that power yeah otherwise he doesn't we he he does half the work and the only reason that it can come to fruition whatever he wants is when we meet him there yeah and do it for him yeah and so that's why it's so important to like hold yourself accountable and be like because like i know i love blaming things on the devil i really do and then it's really i have to and i i do a good job of keeping myself accountable accountable and being like well what did i do here to to allow this to happen?

Because it's not just him. Yeah. I'm out here doing the devil's work for him sometimes. Absolutely, yeah. Even worldly things like our careers. Oh, 100%. We could be under the influence of that, too. I know I was.

That's all I could think about. Oh, yeah. I was getting money in my career. And why aren't I getting this job? And what do I do? And I wasn't sober-minded. 100%. So that's a big one too um I I have Thessalonians 5 verse 6 to 8 so then let us not be like others who are asleep but let us be awake and sober for those who sleep sleep at night and those who get drunk get drunk

at night but since we belong to the day let us be sober putting on faith and love as a breastplate and the hope of salvation as a helmet i know they're not like literally meaning just be sober from alcohol and drugs but i think being sober minded and alert and aware is so crucial to like you guys you know not to make it so heavy again but we're in a constant spiritual battle and and you let down your guard for even just a second you let the enemy in there i know this is a thing but like you know they're called spirits for a reason i really believe that when you're under the influence and especially if you're blacked out you have no armor for you like you are just a host for anything and anyone to get in

there can go in there and and take out and do what they want with you I have seen many people in the past couple years commit suicide and every single one of them were under the influence so if you're already battling with mental illness right now, the worst thing you can do is have a drink or take the pills. It's, it's, it's awful. Like it's, I can't even believe it. I know. And listen, we're coming from a place too of like, we are not some like church girls who have never seen anything or been around anything trust me we've seen it we've been there I've done some like I I've I've been there so we're not telling you this by being like oh you gotta be a good kid no we're being like this is your life we're talking

about like it's so serious and you have to treat it like it's serious because you get caught up so quickly like I know for me I never thought I was going to be in a position where I had to get sober I truly was so arrogant that I thought I am way too smart for anything like that to ever happen to me and then all of a sudden you f around and find out and all of a sudden you're in a okay you and then almost true like you you get caught up and then you're doing things that you didn't mean to do. And it happens quickly. You have to be careful with that stuff.

Yeah. And another thing I want to touch on, and I don't care if we're the two most annoying girls on the Internet and we're Debbie Downer party poopers. I want to talk about weed, marijuana. All right. We live in a culture that pushes weed so hard on people and i'm not saying don't if you smoke you're you know you're gonna go to hell by any means but i just want you to like be honest with yourself and this is not coming this is coming with truly no judgment i genuinely want you to ask yourself is we doing anything good for your life is it like if you say that it's it's easing your anxiety okay I understand

that is it getting to the root of the issue it's not because if you're masking something and that's what it is it is masking it you're not getting to the root of the issue and anyone who says weed is just great for everyone and it should be thank god it's legal because it's so good for everyone we have it on every corner here in LA i know people who've gone into psychosis from weed multiple actually and i also know people who have given up on their dreams after starting to smoke weed yeah and who sit inside all day and like you know don't do anything because they're so because weed makes you so complacent and comfortable in whatever you're doing. The only time I'll say that it's OK is if you are battling with cancer. Yeah. I mean, listen, there's there's there's things like that where obviously it's not a one size fits all anything.

And and there are times where, you know, medicinal medicinal marijuana like maybe I don't know I I'm not a doctor I'm just saying these are my thoughts and and it's really scary to come on here and have an opinion especially because like nobody lets you have an opinion these days but I think it's important to say it because it's I believe what the truth is so so basically what you're saying is you don't celebrate 420. I don't celebrate 420. It is the month of Easter, so I like it. What else?

So, yeah, like Andrew was saying, we aren't, you know, we're not little proper church girls like we get in the comments. We've been through some real hard stuff. I mean, for me, I grew up grew I didn't grow up in a cookie cutter town I grew up seeing people literally shoot heroin in their arms like on the side of the street well Boston's crazy it's crazy out there in Boston it's not funny sorry it's definitely not funny it's really dark stuff yeah um I've seen a lot I've seen i've lost half of my high school to drugs and alcohol so i think growing up seeing that i went the other way yeah i was like i never want to touch that i never want to go near that and also drinking isn't cool i'm like why why is this cool like when we go out and

i see everyone around me not in control of their self or their thoughts i'm like like you look like an idiot like you don't look cool like this is honestly i want anyone who's listening all right we're your big sisters or maybe your little sisters we just want to tell you from us take it from us the coolest thing that you cannot do or the coolest thing that you can do is not drink. Yeah. I am so proud to not drink. I honestly like when I first stopped drinking, it was really hard. It was really awkward.

I hated having to tell people and go through the story. And nobody lets you either. That's what's funny is people are so like they don't they don't take it lightly when you tell them that you don't drink anyone who asks me if i say i'm not drinking they go why why but like they'll go hard and then i just go three years and they go oh good for you like you people won't accept it unless you have a legitimate problem apparently so i do tell people when they for if they're trying to take a break from drinking i tell them tell people you're sober tell them when they, if they're trying to take a break from drinking, I tell them, tell people you're sober. Tell them three years sober and they'll like shut up about it.

But here's the thing. I think, and I was talking to Angie about this. I go out to dinner with my girlfriends all the time. I love to have a glass of wine. But you have to sit with yourself and say, can I have this glass of wine? For me, I don't have that addictive personality. I can have one sip of wine and be done. Like I don't. So I think it's can have one sip of wine and be done. Like I don't.

So I think it's about can you have balance in your life? Can you have that glass of wine? If you have that addictive personality and you know you can or you're going through such a hard time, just know that you can't do that. So true. Because I'm telling you, it's not worth it. I have seen so many people, like I said just a couple minutes ago

committing suicide it clouds your judgment it's it's it's there's nothing good that comes from alcohol nothing or drugs we're talking about drugs here too the pills that all that um and And for me, alcohol really dulled my spirit. Like it truly dulled my spirit. I had no spiritual life whatsoever. It was cloudy. I certainly couldn't hear God. Like it creates a massive disconnect from us and from God. Like he did not create us to be reliant on anything other than him and his love

and I what do you think about people saying that they need to do psychedelics to like have a spiritual experience oh well I will just say my girlfriend did it and she literally she thought it was going to change her life and she called me and she said ariel i saw flaming devils i don't know i don't i honestly don't believe in it i i thing i don't know it's i've talked to some people it's it's helped them i personally i don't believe in it the thing about doing psychedelics to have this is what i think if you need drugs to have a profound spiritual experience your spirit's in bad shape we We have profound spiritual experiences every day.

Yeah. Because we have profound experiences all the time. Yeah. And I just, I think I get it. I completely understand the, you know, the desire and the interest. Take what you want. I'm not, I don't want to be the annoying person who's like, don't do anything, but don't do anything. Like just don't, it's not worth it. I hear you. You can have these

awakenings, but what are you being awakened to though? That's the problem. I don't, cause okay. I'm just going to say it, please, for the love of God, don't take any disrespect to anyone. Cause I mean it from the goodness of my heart. I've never seen anyone who got involved with psychedelics like live a good life. I know. Or have anything like. Me too. Like things get weird and they get weird. And like their brain gets weird.

I've never seen it and been like, wow, this person's going to succeed in life because of this. If you want to have a spiritual awakening, you can do it through Jesus. Eat the woodesus eat the wood truly come on man read the gospel john in the fuse yeah seriously like i don't know i just i like no yeah and i i'm just i'm so we gonna get some heat for this you know what if if it's the ones who get it get it and the ones who don't don't and if and if you're sitting here being like you guys are stupid whatever whatever you know jesus loves you anyways and you should still read the bible if you don't agree it is what it is but i'm i'm talking from experience again these aren't

people who've never done anything in their life and are just speaking because this is what the Bible says to do. We've done everything, and we're telling you that it's not cool over there. It's really not. Listen, I understand, like, people are suffering right now mentally. Like, it's no joke. Like, I see it every day, especially from background. People are struggling mentally. They don't know what to do. like it's it's no joke like I see it every day especially from background from people are struggling mentally they don't know what to do they they're looking for an escape they want some

sort of awakening they want to be okay again they just want to be better they want to see things clearly people can't see straight yeah um so we understand mean, I definitely understand. OK, and thank you for saying that, because I think we've been talking about we've been talking from the perspective of like people who, you know, think doing drugs and stuff is cool and it's fun. But we should touch on the fact that a lot of people don't do it because they think it's fun. They do it because they have no other choice. Yeah, people are hurting. Yeah. And I see it all the time. And then they start the drugs. And then they get addicted to it. And then they wake up. And then their mind is still a mess.

But they have to keep doing it because now they're addicted to it. Yeah. And it's like, and that's the start of a downhill life. Yeah. And it's a vicious cycle. It's a vicious cycle. And nothing good comes out of it. Yeah. And, and, and, and, and it's a vicious cycle. It's a vicious cycle and nothing good comes out of it. Nothing. Um, I like, I, when I was, I remember when I was in the thick of my drinking

and I was struggling so much, I remember feeling like obviously awful about it. Um, and I did hurt some people along the journey of my drinking and I remember being like I I don't want to hurt anybody from this I just want to feel better like I was so scared and so broken and so anxious that it was the only option that I had. It's the only thing that helped me. Yeah. And I wasn't doing it because I wanted to be like that. I was doing it because I felt there was no other option. So I completely understand being left with nothing and this being the only thing that will, will, you know, take the pain away. Yeah. Um um but you just have to remember that it's not actually taking the pain away it never will it will only mask it and then it comes back 10 times worse yeah and i just i if you have thought about getting sober or it's like you've been interested or

there's something called sober curious like people don't want to make the commitment but they're curious about it because I think God will illuminate the fact that a life without that stuff is actually truly a life worth living I just want you to take it from me right now and take it from our that if this is something that you've been thinking about this truly could be your sign that it might be time, that you can do it. Yeah, and I want to also say I know Angie didn't go to AA. She was lucky, amazing that you had the spirituality to get you through that. But I will tell you, because I have family members and friends that went to AA,

it is life-changing and it's an incredible thing. And it's also that went to AA. It is life-changing, and it's an incredible thing. And it's also very faith-based. It is. And getting a sponsor is the best thing you can do too because they're your best friend, they're your sister or your brother. They stick by you. You can call them at all hours of the day. It's one of the best things you could ever do if you want to get sober

is join a group. So true. Please. What was that question about therapy? Someone said something like my dad told me. Oh, yeah. My dad told me not to go to therapy to just pray. And I disagree fully.

I therapy changed my life. I think it's crucial. I mean, look, we spend money on our hair, on clothes. Why not spend money on our mind? Go to therapy, unpack all of your traumas to somebody, not just a friend or a family member who already knows you. Go to someone who's a professional, who doesn't know you, who's not going to judge you, that you can literally just unpack everything and talk it through. It changed my life. So true.

It's the best thing you can do for yourself. And you incorporate that with praying. Exactly. And God and reading the word. God gave us all these tools. Like he gave us medicine. He gave us therapy. He gave us education and psychology.

And you know what I mean like this I think that God would be really pleased to see you go into therapy to try and figure some things out and and and of course it never means to ignore the word and ignore your spiritual life but it goes hand in hand together I think it's great I told the story last time I literally talked to a therapist one time one conversation it's all needed. She she set me free from because, yeah, they ask you questions that your friends don't know to ask. Exactly. I think to get to the root of it. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I I. But we get it. People are struggling. They want a way out. And it's hard.

It's tough. And I know. I battle with my friends through it and my family through it. It's sad. It's really sad what people are going through and what they're battling in their heart and in their heads. So we give you grace. Oh, gosh, yeah. Truly.

And I think we have such a hard stance on it because we've we've seen some stuff. We've been through some stuff. And I know it's not it's so much easier said than done. Like, again, if you told me that I would get to a place where I am now that I don't even I mean, I could be around and I am I've worked in nightlife since getting sober. I'm around alcohol all the time. All my friends drink. But I I am this is what I think that I have. There are parts of my life where just like the rest of us are not fully surrendered to God naturally. I mean, we try our best and I really do try my best, but there's parts that are not. This sobriety, like I am fully surrendered, fully in agreement with God that alcohol is my enemy. Drugs are my enemy. Yeah. And I cannot have it in my life. I can't flirt with it. I can't dance with it. I can't have, I can't even think about it. And I believe him when he tells me that it's it's bad for me. And I think it's when

we are in a place of not believing God that something isn't good for us that we continue to go back to it. You know? Yeah. And I hope that this whole conversation makes you reflect and think about it and think about your relationship with this stuff and and I'm not telling you to like not have a good time in life like have a good time have fun live your life but just be honest with yourself like Ari said earlier reflect and be like is this am I the type of person that can handle this stuff because there are people who can there are people me and Ari go out she has a glass of wine I don't I can't she can and that's what it is and it's fine um but you know Jesus loves you so much

he does not want to see you suffering and and being bound even to something like vaping let me be honest i have struggled with nicotine like alcohol is my enemy nicotine this is like a bad ex-boyfriend you know what i mean i had a bad breakup with alcohol nicotine i didn't really like it's the you know there's still there's still things that like i'm not i i've i don't smoke but i vaping is like that's another thing where like you have to understand if you are addicted to a little usb stick that blows out air you that's a problem that's really bad i'm gonna just say this because i don't really feel bad about the vaping because it's not something that people should go to in their week when i see people sucking on like a strawberry kiwi vape i'm like

what in the world is 2023 what happened we're have flying cars, but we have mango vapes. We have a line. Should we answer some questions? I think so, yeah. While we're on the topic of sobriety. Sobriety. How to say no to drink in social settings. Just say no.

It's not. Who cares what people think of you what i love about like i don't know does that sound no no but what i love about us is we're just like i we don't care what people think no truly like i don't care like i want to be a leader not a follower like i don't want to go out and do what everyone's doing and watch everyone look like degenerates all drunk and drooling like no we go out and we look good and we're fun and we don't need to do that who cares what other people are doing don't be a follower like just say no and if they have anything to say be like my sisters are in the end don't do it

i don't know if you know my sisters are in ang but i love what you just said so much be a leader not a follower the bible says we are the head and not the tail you are a leader not a follower when you go out and people are giving you crap about how you have to not have a drink or not to do cocaine or whatever they're doing in these streets please don't do cocaine no truly i you're so right you the way that you do it is you be it's gonna take practice and it's not gonna be easy and let me tell you one thing let me tell you let me tell you one thing when people when you tell somebody that you're not drinking and they start nagging you they judge you they you have to understand that that is a projection of what they're feeling it calls them out that you're

not drinking by you not drinking it makes them think why am i and they're not yeah well why am i doing drugs if they're not and And it's a complete projection. They feel uncomfortable because you are not. You're holding up a mirror being like, I'm actually doing the right thing. And you know why? Because they can't go out without drinks because they feel like how you know like girls put in my life and friends and they ask like how I can how you can be so confident not drinking when you go out this is the thing it wasn't always like that especially when I first stopped drinking it was really really tough and I worked through a lot of social anxiety it took a minute but know what? I got to a point where it's been however many years that I haven't been drinking and it's practice over and over again of being myself. I have nothing to mask when I'm out. It's just me. So I had to get comfortable in that. It wasn't right away. It took a little while. But now because it's been so long, I am comfortable in who i am when i'm out you absolutely are all right relax show us the dance move dance move why did i almost do it what do you do to me i don't know all right anyways but you know what i mean like you think that alcohol makes you more confident and more fun but all it does is mask your true self.

And age you. And age you, yes. But when you are using alcohol for confidence, you have to understand that in those moments of social anxiety and uncomfortability is where we grow. You are stunting your growth when you are masking your anxiety by sitting there and living in it and dealing with it and working through it you step by step you get closer to not feeling that way again but the more you mask it you'll never get over it and I hate to talk about well no I don't hate to but I know I talk about it a lot but I'm someone who definitely had a lot of social anxiety I had no idea what you were gonna say no I did like with my words and speaking even starting this podcast I had a hard time yeah me and so that's something that I really prayed upon like help me be bold help me have

more confidence I pray on that all the time. And that prayer really does work. Boldness is something God wants you to have. So you ask him for it. He will give it to you. Say it with me. He will give it to you. I wanted to answer a question since we're on the subject of drinking and mental health and all of that, this is something really dear and near to my heart just because I see so much struggle in people and how they're going to suicide. So somebody,

somebody asked the question, how to battle, I'm battling suicide thoughts, how to overcome that. And what I'm going to say to you is most people don't want to die they just want to end their pain and let me tell you you don't have to die to end your pain and I know that that depression is so overwhelming and those thoughts are so intrusive and just what you're going through is so crippling but I promise you it doesn't last this is someone who was there I was there and it comes in waves and no feeling lasts I promise you you will get through it God is not going to take you through something he doesn't know he can't get you through and there is something on the other side of what you're going through. I can assure you of that because I'm there right now.

And I don't know what you're going through. I don't know if it's a heartbreak, which is the worst thing ever. Or I don't know if you just lost a parent or if you lost two parents or if you're dealing with a family member or a friend that's suffering through cancer I know how difficult it is I know how painful it is I know you don't want to deal with it anymore I know it's scary and I just know how I just know how awful it is but I promise you on the other side of it there's something beautiful. So hang on. Please hang on.

And there are so many outlets you can go to. Resources. We'll put everything. Yes. We are going to put everything in the description. And we are your sisters. And we love you so much. And we know that you can get through this. Truly.

Jesus loves you so much. He wants to see you through this. On that, I just want to read the scripture. Actually, it's 1st or 2nd Corinthians 10.13. No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability. But with the temptation, he will also provide the way of escape that you may be able to endure it. He will provide a way to escape. I'm telling you, when I was down bad, you guys, I was 23 years old. I was so young. I had so much life to live in front of me.

And I truly thought that my life was over. I thought I was done at 23 years old. I thought there was no way out and I was going to be like that forever. God the whole time was planning my escape the entire time he was waiting he was setting it up even when I didn't know he's you have to understand God is always behind the scenes always behind the scenes orchestrating and he will as long as you you you you try to follow in his will like let him even if you don't he's gonna come through and come get you because that's who he is even when we don't deserve it he doesn't love us because we deserve it he loves us because that's who he is and you should have so much peace in that when you when you really can understand this in your heart you can rest you can rest assured and just

surrender and know that he's working behind the scenes. So just relax. Even if you're in the middle of addiction, in the middle of sin, in the middle of a mess, you know what I recommend? I recommend you being like, God, I don't have the strength or the maturity to pull myself out of this. I give you permission to do whatever you need to do to pull me out of this thing. Do what you, I say to him all the time i'm like i don't have the i don't have the willpower to to take care of this thing i ask you to do whatever means necessary even if i don't like it in the moment i ask you to do it for me yeah and you know most of the time he will sometimes he'll be like no i'm gonna let you do it because that's he likes when we grow like that yeah and

like like i said we went through things where we would pray and it wouldn't happen overnight but that we have to he's when he doesn't work when you right when you ask him to it's because he's building your character and building your faith yeah because faith is the most important thing that you need to have it's everything well i wish we could keep going because i have so much more to say but we will do I think we should really do a part two just because I think mental health is such a big thing I mean we have so many questions should we do a whole episode just on questions I think so maybe we'll even ask more have people ask more questions we'll do a whole hour on it yeah we love i swear we feel

like you guys are our best friends i know i'm i love i know it sounds weird but i love you guys so much like with my whole heart i want to see every single person do well i'm telling you whatever i'm going through right now both of us it's like none of it even matters right now because we know that helping you guys has given us all the purpose in the world it makes me want to cry um so it really does i mean it's like and i i said it last time but i'll say it again in like we come on here to help people when this is helping us more than anything like this is so healing for us to do this has this has like doing this podcast has put us in a position of being like oh we gotta live right now we gotta do the right thing we cannot come on here and tell people to live a way that we're not

living yeah and so anyone who loves this podcast, we love you so much. God bless you guys. God bless you. May the Lord bless you and keep you. May he make his face shine upon you and be gracious to you. May he turn his face towards you and give you peace. God bless you. Read the Bible every day.

Don't forget. God, we love you so much. We love you. We love you guys. And we thank you again should we do our handshake whatever