Girls Gotta Eat - A MasterClass in Sex Appeal with Shan Boodram and Jared Brady

Episode Date: March 3, 2025

If you want to hone your sex appeal, this episode is made for you. We are excited to be joined once again by sex educator, author, and new MasterClass instructor Shan Boodram, and this time with her partner Jared Brady, to talk all about what makes us sexy and how to draw people in. We're discussing the art of flirting, how to catch someone's attention in public, moves like the "sexy eye triangle," and how to keep a conversation exciting. We're also talking about keeping the passion alive in a relationship, the five levels of communication you have with your partner, navigating dry spells, "choreplay," and turn-on triggers. And we all share who our sexual icons are, and Shan and Jared share their one piece of advice for having sex appeal. Before our guests join us, we're sharing our listeners' answers to "What's the dumbest lie a guy has told you?" and we reveal one of our own that we've been laughing/wondering about for years. Enjoy! Follow Shan on Instagram @shanboodram and Jared @enjoyjaredbrady. Watch Shan's MasterClass The Art of Sex Appeal and listen to her podcast Lovers by Shan. Follow us on Instagram @girlsgottaeatpodcast, Ashley @ashhess, and Rayna @rayna.greenberg. Visit girlsgottaeat.com for more. Thank you to our partners this week: Betterhelp: Get 10% off your first month at https://betterhelp.com/gge. Addyi: Learn more at https://addyi.com. Article: Get $50 off your first purchase of $100 or more at http://article.com/gge. Rocket Money: Cancel your unwanted subscriptions at https://rocketmoney.com/gge. Nutrafol: Get $10 off your first month's subscription and free shipping when you subscribe at https://nutrafol.com with code GGE10. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Can we talk about your sexy eye triangle? Yes. Love the sexy eye triangle. Yeah, you did it. I got turned on. This podcast is a Dear Media production. Hi, guys. Hi, guys.

Welcome back to another episode of Girls Gotta Eat. Welcome back. Happy March. It is March. February flew by. Yeah, it did. It took me so. I was like, what did I do in February?

What did you even do? I didn't do anything. I flew by. No. What did you do last week? Every week. You were five things you did last week. I'm excited. I went to Miami. I just go back from Miami. We're going to Austin.

Yes. Got plans on plans. Oh, right. That'll be this weekend. Yes. We will be going to South by Southwest and doing some fun stuff. So this will be the first time that I'm leaving my fiance since we've moved in and like he'll be with his wool. How does it feel? I mean, I'm sure he'll be fine. But I'm telling, I mean, I think this is, you know, I never compare kids with pets because it's not the same. thank God. But like leaving the dad for the first time with the kid. Like they've fed them. They've walked them. But the full weekend where they're fully responsible, it's different.

I feel like I can trust a man with a dog. Not kids. I totally trust him. But it is the first time that I'm going to be like, you're in the home with a zoo. Like what are you guys doing? Like, you know, you have it under control. It's like not the same.

But I would trust a man for a week with a dog like totally fine no problem i would not leave my man alone with my child more than a night what that's a lot a long time more than a night dad's are parents are they they're like they're like i better be able to leave if i like a third of the squad i better be able to leave my man with my kid i'll never have i feel like i just i have a hard time in the house i guess men have taken care of kids for a long time it's just and dogs i just trust them more with dogs and i feel like i just i feel like i just i'm like, I'm glad by, I probably won't be a parent because I just know I'll have a helicopter. A helicopter about everything.

And it's hard for me to trust men to do the right thing in my home. And Rob was staying with me last week. And I left to go to Miami before he left the house. And I had to get up and leave. That was like 6.30 in the morning. I wasn't going to try to be like, please get up with me and leave. So I allowed him to stay there and lock the house up. And I was like, please, if there's like dishes, just put them in the dishwasher and like lock the house.

and he was like, Raina, I'm not an idiot. And I was like, just there's two doors. Please lock them both. And there's a gate. Please lock the gate. I wrote all these instructions out. He sent me a video of himself locking the front door. Like, I'm such an idiot.

I'm so annoying. He's like, here we go, Raina. I locked the door. He shows me like pulling on the handle. He's in front of it. It was very funny. Like, don't helicopter me. And I was like, you know what?

I was too hard on him. Wait, I thought the punchline was going to be that the door wasn't locked. Oh, I'll tell you. So I was sitting there on the plane and I was like, I don't trust it. I texted Tessa and I was like, I think Rob's going to be gone 30 minutes, go check the house. What?

He forgot to lock the gate. He had made a whole video of the door and then forgot the gate. Yes. Because men can handle one thing at a time. A two-door situation, forget it. Oh, my God. And I felt bad like having Tesla go over there. Also, Tesla is really close to me.

It's like not that big of him. But I was like, at your leisure, stop over once he's gone. Nope. Oh my God. That tracks. So, I mean, imagine doing that but with your baby. They did. You give them a list of things and they do half of them. But like one of them is like feed them. Yeah, it's just like, I don't know. It's got to be bare minimum. Just keep them alive. No, he's going to do great. He's like more responsible to me, I feel like. Yeah. He'll be here. He's my caretaker. He's my babysitter. All right. I think it's going to go great. And I'm excited for Southby.

Oh, my gosh. Well, I haven't been to Austin in so long. When was last time you were in Austin? Oh, I guess our show, 2023. Oh, it has been a while. Yeah. And it was so hot. It was September. We were, like, sick from the heat.

I've been checking the weather. I feel like you can't. Like, Texas weather, I never know what it's doing in the winter. So I'm hoping for 70s. I have cute fits. I just can't wait. I can't wait. All right.

Well, let's thank our partners and then we'll get right into it. Thanks to Article, get $50 off your first purchase of $100 or more at article. At article.com slash GGE. And BetterHelp get 10% off your first month at betterhelp. dot com slash gge and thank you to rocket money cancel your unwanted subscriptions at rocketmoney.com slash gge and neuterful get $10 off your first month subscription and free shipping when you subscribe at neuterful.com with code gg10 and addie learn more at addie.com so i just go back from south beach i went to the miami wanting food festival was like really a lot of fun jeremy got me

a press pass so i could like go to all these things and it just was like the best weekend but this thing happened on the plane that i was excited to Oh my God. The plane crashed. No, I survived. Look at me go. I was flying back on Sunday night, and the pilot was, like, talking about the route we were going to take, and he was like, we're going to fly over this and then this and this,

which I've never got to pilot, like, let you know, unless you're going over the Grand Canyon. Well, now I think they're trying to reassure you more with everything going on. Well, as we were, he goes, we're going to go here and here, and then we're going to fly over the Gulf of Mexico. And he said it real hard, and then just. paused. No. Did anyone clap? I would have laughed audibly laughed at the, but people were like looking at me.

I was like, I can't believe that actually is on this flight with me. Like, do I have no community on this plane? I wanted somebody to laugh with me so badly because he paused and then like finished his sentence. It was so funny. No, he paused for dramatic effect. Yes. It's like a drum roll.

Yes. Yeah, it's the Gulf of Mexico. No, like that's what it is. But the rest of the weekend was great. I stayed up until like 132 in the morning, three nights in a row. And that has never happened. Yeah, it's such a fun thing. I want to do it again next year.

I was wondering if it was going to be as fun as you remember it being. Because things just like aren't as good as they used to be. Totally. Maybe it's, we're aging out. But some festivals are actually not like they used to be. I'm not naming any names. But, you know, in their heyday when we kind of first started the podcast, like certain things were so fun and they've just kind of fallen off.

Or stuff just seems really cool and fun. When you first started to get out of these opportunities and you're like, I don't know, I don't need to do this shit. Yeah, but some actually have. So I'm glad to hear that was still the same. Going strong. So fun, fun events and cool people and like fancy parties and I love to hear it. Yeah. And I just at these things, like South by is similar.

Like I put a lot of pressure on myself to like have all these plans and parties. And then I'm just like, I don't know. Just give myself permission to chill. I love to do a bunch of stuff. I know you do. I'm like, what are we doing Friday night? What are we doing Saturday? Day.

Saturday. early evening, Saturday night, Sunday, Sunday dinner. We like a lot of plans. Yeah. But yeah, it was great. I got a little worried. I feel like the mom of the group because I am older than everybody else that goes. Everybody?

A lot of people. Jeremy stayed out and went to like 11 and bodega every night. Yeah. I saw myself home. I mean, you know, I've always been the kind of, I just, I don't need to be awake at those hours when everyone's just fucked up, nodding out. I'm fighting through the drunkenness. I'm good.

Yeah, no. I don't know if you talk about this, but I'm planning Raina Palluzza for my birthday party in June and it's going to be three nights. nights and I just wanted to be like nice and early like Friday night's just going to be dinner. Oh. I'm going to plan like a big dinner out and then Saturday's festival day. So Saturday is the Paloza. Oh my God. So it's going to be like Coachella meets the Hamptons and we are going to like party but I'm going to start that party at like five and I'm going to have people see their

way out by 1030 and they can go have their own night somewhere else. No, because it's going to be like summer house. Like it's going to be there's going to be an after party. I'm going to set up a DJ table. I'm going to have a mic. I will. bring my karaoke machine. So I really am inspired by Summer House for what I want to do for the party. And I was thinking like, do you think that DJ Kyle Cook would DJ the party? Maybe. What else is he doing? They haven't started their summer yet. No, I think it's, I think it's, I think, July 4th, I feel like. They always do. So he's probably not booked and busy. Yeah. And he's going to want to be in the Hamptons. Yeah. And if anybody else wants to sponsor the party too, I'm so dead. Face Jules.

Loverboy. No, I'm very excited. But yeah, I like to plan. like a nice early. Like maybe Sunday we'd do like a beach picnic. Yeah. I was like set it up on the beach. Everyone's back at the house by 6.30. Are you doing a boat? So I was thinking Sunday, boat in the morning.

Then we do a beach picnic where they like set stuff up. That feels like two aquatic activities, which you don't usually see back to back. When it's rain o'plooze that you do. Okay. I really enjoy. I like water activities. Okay. Take a boat to the picnic?

Yeah, I kind of like that idea. Okay, got it. So we're like out in the water for a couple hours. Then we docked and there was like a beach picnic. And it's been really, I've been like edging. I'm like, when do I send to save the dates? Because like it's February. So right now today it's February.

So it's weird to be like, plan this thing in the middle of June. But like, it's not. People plan their summer vacations and I don't want them to plan something else. No, I'm starting to get stressed about save the dates for my wedding. And that's November. Oh, definitely. Like I'm feeling panic. Like we got to get this, get this shit going.

To get tested and make on campus. And my two bachelorette parties. Oh, that you definitely have to. Yeah. Because a lot of our friends are East Coast based. They'll come up to the Hamptons for the weekend. This is different. Yeah.

Well, I'm glad I made the cut. For what? The house. Two tears. Can you imagine? For a Rana Palozo. Can you imagine? I was like, I'm so sorry, Ashley.

You didn't make the cover the house? I'm done. It's six bedrooms, and I actually have been like over-promising a little bit. Like, I'm just like, come, stay at the house. Like, I don't know who all these bedrooms are going to go to. Oh, my God. But you and I have at least, like, figured out which buckets of people were going to actively tell to just get their own house. Yeah.

On the house? On the bedrooms. Like, first pick, second pick. I'll tell everybody that. But I'm going to call this Raynal Palooza. Do you think everybody's going to get it? No, Raina Palooza sounds really good because it is like Lala Palooza. That's what I based on.

Like Ashley Palooza sounds forced and fucking stupid. You know, like the A really works, but I still like Raynal. And I'm making a big deal on it. It's going to be my 40th birthday. I'm just going to like, everybody else plans these big fucking things for their weddings. And so like, I mean, you plan a huge thing for your 40. Like, why not make it a blowout sense? Save the dates. And my sister-in-law and my brother live in London and I said her like, do you think you can make it? She's like, we've a wedding weekend before and then we can after.

And I was like, assume this is a wedding. Yeah. And you are coming. Yeah. So I'm really excited. Yeah. Register. You register. I said a link to register. A bunch of festival outfits. We have to buy you like revolve like chains. Yeah. I'm going to do themed outfits. Obviously there's going to be like register as we have to buy all our clothes. I was wondering like what I'm allowed to ask people to pay for. So I made a festival flyer and it says day one, day two, day three. And I'm wondering if I'm like, if you want to come to the Friday dinner, like just Vemmo me $50.

Here's a QR code. This is so funny. Like someone's like, I just want a Friday pass. Can I just buy Saturday? Yes. Not the three-day wristband. Okay. You want to see them?

Wait, I love this. I'm going to send wristbands. Wrist bands will be fun. Put them on the registry. Okay, I don't know people can see. I don't want people to see this. Oh my God. This is the Coachella poster.

And this is the Randapalooza, Day 1, Day 2, Day 3. I like the idea of wristbands. Yeah. A workout class. You're not doing that. Well, I already let Bobby and Izzy know that they have to teach a workout class on the lawn on Saturday morning. On the lawn.

On the great lawn. I just want them to like kind of just like bicker and tell jokes. and like we'll kind of work out. Like maybe it would be like a relay race. Oh, that's what you think. Bobby taught a workout class on the morning of Rob's wedding. I was sore for a week. He did not take it easy on us.

He has this video of me. We did you do these like wheelbarrel things. He has this video of me. I was fighting for my life. Like they are not going to just dick around. Like it's going to be so intense. And it's going to be like a boot camp style. What if we did like a cute little relay race?

Oh my God. Well, I've commissioned them to do it. Okay. I wanted an activity in the morning. I will not be doing that. Take that off my wristband. Okay. What if I send people sign up links?

I don't have access to the workout class. What if I made like a landing page and there's sign up links for like which things you want to do? Yeah. And like the knot. For each one. And my registry is on there for what I want. I love this. Thank you.

I can't wait. I'm really excited. I'm really excited. Well, it's funny because I like had to give your birthday as a blackout date when our agent, my agent was doing my tour. So like there's multiple texts. And he's like, I know this weekend because of Raina, because of Raina. It's just like very funny. And then which weekend before Raina, like everything was just like around this date.

Because he was like, it's a hot date. He should come too. Yeah. He should come too. He should book us some entertainment. We'll do a show. That's how we'll pay for the weekend. I love that idea.

Girls got to eat show. Well, if anybody wants to like sponsor it and they give me free stuff, just let me know, you know? Okay. So we did this episode last week about what do you hide from your partner and, you know, mainly geared towards the girlies and like what you may hide from your male partner, for example, but we asked on Instagram, what is the funniest thing a guy has ever lied to you about? You know, this is kind of the other side of it. The silly things that guys lie about.

This feels like newer, not like a partner. This feels like newer. So, okay, I wrote a couple of my favorite sound, but I actually wanted to discuss this one with you a little bit. So that he would rock my world sexually. I think. It's so funny that she was like the biggest lie you've ever heard. I always say that like the first time, or you make the first two to three times you've sex with somebody,

it can be kind of weird and awkward. I think that like everybody's a different bar for like good sexes, quote unquote. Like I dated that guy that was like, I feel like I finally met my sexual match in you. I was like, I literally hate having sex with you. Yeah. But I was talking to this guy this weekend and he said to me,

I've been like seeing this girl and she like kind of like talked to big game and like kind of lied to me. And I was like, what did she do? And he said, she said she was going to be like the best fuck of my whole life. And he was like, it was so bad. And I was like, I don't think she lied to you. I think that she, like, think she's, like, fun and spite. I don't think they're lying.

I think people think that they're, like, better at it. Than they are. Okay. I would never say that to somebody. I think that's a wild way to set expectations. Like, you want to under promise and over-deliver. I worry about telling people, like, when I'm on dates with them, that I own a sex-to-a-compan. It immediately makes people think you're going to be, like, so freaky and crazy.

And, yeah, of course, I can be like that, but you're not going to get that out of me, like, except for that guy, too bag of my face. but you could interpret it the other way. You could be like, oh, she doesn't even fuck. She just masturbates all the time. You know, but yes, people just think we're like so freaky. Totally. And I can hear somebody on it being like,

you're not ready for what I'm going to do to your body. And I don't know. I would never talk a game like that because I want people to really, I want people to really under-anticipate how good I'm going to be at something. Yeah, under-promise over-deliver. I mean, I think that anyone who talks that big game is going to be mid. Yeah. It's weird.

I think people that are like really good in bed don't really say that. I mean, I'm sure there's some that do. They just know it and they're confident about it and they don't have to tell you like, I'm about to rock your world, girl. I'm like, oh, ew. And also, you're not, actually. I changed my mind. It can feel a little performative.

I think people that are like, I'm about to do the craziest shit. It's like, well, you don't even know what I like. Well, and the crazy shit, quote unquote, I mean, I think, you know, so many of us, especially in our 20s or college or whatever had like crazy stuff. drunk sex and whatever. But also I didn't have a lot of like moves like I do now. She's got moves now. Whatever your special things are, whatever your special sauce is.

Whatever your signature moves are, like you aren't always pulling those out the first night with a new person. No, I mean, I think that I give like, I love to give head. I like oral sex. I'm definitely not telling somebody. It's about to be the bad dick-sucking spirits of your father. And I'm also like probably not doing that the first couple times. You're not getting the goods.

Okay. So let's do a couple more lies. Okay. He had a black blender bottle saying it was pre-workout. It was Bacardi zombie. First of all, what is Bacardi zombie? What is Bacardi zombie? Because as a former Bacardi enthusiast, but just like lying about the alcohol in general is like...

Well, that's really bad. Oh my God. Wait, let me look. It's like it looks like hypnotic. What? It's like a blue. drink, Bacardi zombie, premium run cocktail with citrus passion fruit and triple sec flavors. Okay, it's like a malt.

It looks like a malt liquor. That's absolutely insane. And also like, did you not think somebody was going to smell it on your breath? Also, is he taking it to the gym? That is crazy. That's my pre-workout. Lied to me and said to get furniture. I mean, when you first walk into a man's apartment, there is that moment where you were like,

what is about to be in here? Yeah. You know, it is like a frightening moment. Right. Like no furniture, stuffed animals. Okay. So these two similar vein needed to break up because he was taking an overseas job opportunity, but he never left. And this could have been the same guy. We should introduce these girls. He was being deployed to Baghdad in 2023. So sounds like he's still around. Do you remember during COVID when I was with my neighbor? And I told him that I had to go back to Pittsburgh to be with my parents. And then I just like, because I didn't want to be around him anymore. And this was during the height of the pandemic quarantine. And I just like ran him into. him in the elevator a couple days later and you're like, I thought you were going home to your parents. And I was like, they died. They died.

Okay. This one, lie or not. Okay. Having roommates, but it really was his parents. Did he lie? It's a lie by omission. If you don't ask the follow up question of who are the roommates. Okay, he lied that he did an ex-fiancee that died.

Oh my gosh. That's so dark. Just wanted like a sympathy vote. You wanted you to like sympathy fuck him. Yeah. He told me he had a terminal disease. That is bad karma. People that lie about stuff to get your sympathy.

And it's like, I don't actually like really even know where that's coming from because it's not like, I did it to fucking fuck her. It's like, we'll fuck you for less. And now you're married to this lie. Right. The ex-wife that died or the terminal illness. He told me he used to take the hot baking sheet out of the oven without an oven mitt. Let me see your hands. I'll prove this right now.

He has like soft lady fingers. That are so stupid. No, but what if he has these calloused hands? You're like, he probably did. So I can see that actually being true. It's just something that women wouldn't do. Like, men have games where they hit each other in the nuts just to see who can deal with it longer. I know.

Like, I can see a man that's like, he was an oven mitt, you pussy. Yes. Okay. He told me he was his birthday, which he faked because he wanted me to just celebrate him. What? Or getting gifts? Yep. Oh, my God.

Wait, that he got veneers. It was long distance. Did he think I never find out? What do you, that he got veneers? What's the, just look at his teeth. What's the point of a lie? What do you, why would you lie about it? Wouldn't you lie and say you don't have veneers?

You want people to think those are your natural teeth? But like, okay, I'm wondering if he said like, I have veneers, not like I'm getting them. Can you think of a time a guy lied? I mean, all the times. Like a one that sticks out. I had a guy, oh my God, this was the guy that I had an off and on hookup thing in college. And then we both lived in Atlanta after college. and we saw each other a couple times.

And I was like, okay, now we can date, you know. And so one night we were hanging out and he was like, I want to like take you out and like, you know, try to do this or whatever. I couldn't even function all day at work. I've never been so excited in my life. And then like a couple hours before he said his friend died and never rescheduled. That's crazy. I mean, maybe he did, but doubt it.

Okay, I have two lies. Okay. That jogged my memory of a lie. So this was the guy that we met in New York. You and I met him at the same time in an event. He asked me out. Yeah. We had a date plan for Saturday.

day and then what do you tell me he forgot this friend's wife died and he has to go to the funeral this afternoon. Oh my God. Yes. Memory Unlocked. Remember that guy? Yes. And then this one guy kept, he didn't live in New York. He kept bugging me to come to New York for the weekend. He like really wanted to come, whatever. And I had said, okay. And then he said, I actually can't. I have COVID and I'm really sick. And I was like, all right. And I went to look at his Instagram story from my profile and he had no stories up and I looked at his story from Girls Got to Eat and he was snowboarding with his friends. No.

No, we thought he could get away with it. Like we don't have multiple accounts. He forgot to just block the stories from Girls Got to Eat. And when I confronted him about it, he gaslit me and acted like he had, I don't even know how to do that right now. I don't even how to block him from my stories? Because I was like, how are you feeling? And he was like, I don't really feel good.

And I was like, you could go out and like, you know, just like go. skiing or something. Like people, you know, you could be outside. He was like, great, I have COVID. I was like, no. Oh, my God. So anyways, that was like a fun little lie. And then just little things, I guess.

I haven't really dated a lot of people that would lie to me. That would not be really, that would not happen. Well, I live to catch someone a lie. You can't date me. I'm an FBI agent. Like, you can't lie to me. Like, I don't know. I just, I don't want to date somebody.

I need to catch them in lies. But I've caught in, like, plenty of people in lies. All right, well, I want to wrap it up with my favorite thing that we actually still aren't sure if it's a lie, but it has haunted me for so many years. Okay. No, like, this is like one of our favorite things as best friends. Like, we're going to let you guys in on it. We talked about this for five years.

We talked about this. Yeah. So this text got sent in 2022. Okay. Yeah. So it was in April, right? March. So I met this guy into an early 2022.

This is the anniversary of the, we don't know what's a lot. Yes, yes, it's coming up on the three-year anniversary. So we met in January, 2022. We talked off and on probably again in March. That's when he wrote full transparency, I miss you. So he sent me this like Sunday evening text. Like full transparency, I miss you. And I said how convenient I'm coming to where he lives next week. What had happened was we had a show in Portland and we were going to do a layover there. So then I touched base and there was a whole thing of, if he was going to be in town or not because he had to go to a bachelor party. And he had told me like the bachelor party he was starting on like Wednesday. And I was like, that's a long bachelor party. Could be a lie.

Could be a lie. But we weren't going to get into town until like Thursday. I wanted to see him. Like we were like excited about it. You and I were going to go together. You were going to hang up with this friend, whatever. So I wrote to him.

I was like the next day or two days later and I was like, hey, Sunday feels. That's what I called him. Are you still starting your bachelor party on Wednesday or will you be in town? I'm nailing down my plans. Because if he wasn't going to be in town, I wasn't going to go with you.

I was just going to go straight to Portland. And he said, I love the new nickname. And then he said, but unfortunately I still have to start this bachelor party on Wednesday night. It was $400 to change it to Thursday. And all of my money is tied up in equities. This is haunted us for years. Ashley was like, if that was a joke, it's like high level.

High level joke. I texted my brother who works in finance and I'm like, I was like, am I misunderstanding what equities are? Like, would somebody not be able to have access to $400 because all their money was tied up in equities? No, again, like, I was like, did he just deeply insult me? I know. So, like, or is he trying to flex? Like, he was younger than me.

He knew I made more money. Like, he was kind of, like, between jobs. Like, I don't know if this was, like, a flex. Like, him trying to speak. My language, whatever. I don't know. Right. Did he think that she, like, she'll be turned on by equities?

But it's so crazy because you could have just been like, I wish I could, but the flight change fee is like a lot. Like, you didn't have to bring equities into it. I know. Like, how did you even think of equities in this scenario? And I don't know if I ever responded. I think I just was like, oh my God. I mean, I think we just made fun of it for three years.

And like, I don't even know. We don't know. I've spoken to him since. Like, I don't know. I still talk to the. friend all the time. He's a good guy. Okay, I wonder if he was like actually $400 was a lot for him. He was between jobs. And so he was making like a self-deprecating joke. Again, that's what I'm saying. If it was a joke, it was really funny.

I know. But it's like, it's really high level. He's saying like, I'm broke. And I can't afford this. And he threw the, it's very funny. Listen, guy, if you're listening, let us know. God. Hey, was this a joke? For your wedding, I'm going to get you the gift of asking him if that was true. Now it feels so like, let's just ask him. You ask him.

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All right, guys, we are so excited to welcome back a guest to the show today. She is a certified sex educator and the internet's most famous sexologist. She is the host of the podcast lovers, the best-selling author of the book The Game of Desire. Her newest project is out now. It is a class on master class called The Art of Sex Appeal, where she teaches you to master the art of flirting, strength and emotional connection, reignite physical, passion, and boost intimacy. And for the first time, she's back on the show with her partner. He is a cinematographer, producer, musician,

lokey sex expert. He also produces the content for their shared company. Please welcome to the show, Shambu Jamper Jam, Jam, and for the first time, Jared Brady. Yay. That was good. Yeah, tell it. You've been doing this.

Seven years. Seven years. She's been doing this. As I'm doing it, I'm like, don't fuck up, don't fuck up. Everyone's counting on you. Were you good at reading aloud in class as a kid? Thank you for bringing this up. I could not.

I was terrified of reading. I hated it. And for the podcast for years, I, like, couldn't. I was always this funny thing rain is bad at reading. Every time I had to read anything, I was like, Ashley can do it. Like, emails from people on stage. And the whole time in my head, I'm like, I'm going to fuck it up. But I read a lot now, and I think it's improved my dictation.

That's so empowering. You're like, you know what? You should do it. It was very impressive. Yeah. Thanks, guys. Well, Shannon, you've been on the show twice. This is your third time.

I know. We're so excited to have you back. And congratulations to both of you on the class with Masterclass. Thank you so much. We'll talk a little bit about your relationship because we did probably hear about it. Jared was your booty call essentially. Yes. Now you have two children.

And can you just tell us how it's going? How you went from booty call to parents? Yeah. I mean, you know, it's a classic love story. You know? It's the best. You know, just kind of slid in the F-boy style and then became a changed man, you know? I just love your relationship and the way you guys speak about each other.

You posted something that I sent to my fiancé that I forget what it was. What was it? Was it, I love you the way that I wish to love myself? Yes. Myself. Oh my gosh. I mean, it brought me to tears. And I just really love seeing you guys navigate your relationship and be open about it.

And obviously, you're both on master class together. But it's just really special to see. Oh, thank you. Yours relationship is so special. Congratulations. Thanks. I saw you guys talking about it on Gail King, too. That's the thing.

Gail was horny. Yeah. Gail was like, Ashley, you're in love, Raina, you're single. And I was like,

I'm on national television. You're caught up like Gail. Maybe she was flirting. Maybe she's like, and you're single. Oh, it was cute. It was very cute.

I have never explored women before, but I've always been attracted to older women. Okay. And I actually think that I have a shot with an older woman. Okay. Who's... Gail?

No, maybe. Maybe Gail listening. But Seema. Oh, okay. Yeah. I'm doing this jewelry line called Kama with her. It's like a sex jewelry line. We talk about it in the class on master class.

But yeah, I think the older women are so sexy. There's just something like special. So that's why I'm just giving you and Gail a moment. Because I think it's really, I think it's hilarious. You're shipping Raina and Gail. Yeah. But do you not think Gail's with Oprah? No.

I don't know. I don't think that. Jared, what are your thoughts? It's weird because like Gail reminds me of my grandma. And so like my dad's mom, you know, I just have a really endearing like vibe with her. Yeah. So thinking of her in this way is like throwing me off. You can't see me and Gail fucking.

Or Oprah and Gail fucking. No, hey, if you do, more power to you. It's probably fun. I wonder what Oprah's like sexually. Don't we all? Yeah. And she is one of the, what are the prototypes? She has a seduction style called the Oprah.

The Oprah. Which when you're around her, you feel like you're living in a dream come true. not just because with Oprah, but she speaks to your highest potential. She talks to you, like you're so smart, so enlightened, so important.

So I think that that's a real gift. But we were talking about sexual fantasies the other day, and I was explaining one of my fantasies to Jared. He was like, what? I'm like, sometimes my fantasies aren't about things that I want to do

or things that I'm interested in or people I'm attracted to. It's just like scenarios that I'm intrigued by. So I think Oprah having sex will probably make it into the bank. Just because I'm intrigued by like what that could mean and look like.

Now I'm thinking about it. Maybe Raina and Gail will make it there as well. Are you going to masturbate to me and Gail? I think so. Are you guys going to talk about it? Sounds like that. Jared isn't. Jared's like she's like my grandma.

I can't think about her fucking. He's like, please stop bringing up Rain and Gail. And we're fucking. Please stop talking about them. Shann's in the bedroom like what would Rain and Gail be doing right now? Talk to me like I'm Gail. That's like that's very fascinating.

It's a very fascinating dynamic. Very sexy. So talk to us about like the research and the idea. I mean, Who better to create a masterclass on sex appeal? But talk to us about the idea and the creation of it. Well, I was actually first on this show years ago when my book came out, The Game of Desire, which was five years ago now, which feels like a very bizarre thing to say.

And so, in essence, the masterclass is, it's like a collection of everything I've talked about for the past 20 years in two hours. It genuinely is everything I know about sex and seduction in two hours. So the first episode is just all about the spots, the positions, the ways of thinking, about yourself, the new kinks you can invite into your world, the nose that you should be considering, and then episode two is all about sex appeal and seduction. So Jared helped to co-write episode one with me, which was really fun because we just took all of these sex courses from these various sex experts. There was this sex expert, you know Kenneth Powers?

No, but I'll make a note of it. He's fascinating. So he's, I think he was like GQ sex expert for a while, but then Jared came back with all these new techniques. So it was like joy. You got to try it out. You know what you're talking about? Let's find out. The research for this sounds fine. Yeah. For me, the thing about sex is like always, it's a long life. So we're exploring.

So maybe somebody has a technique that I've never tried before. I'm like, oh, maybe let me see how that works out. It makes sense. And then I get to try it on Shannon and then she gets to tell me if it was good. Should we put it in the master class or not? We didn't put this one of the master class, but I was just talking about it being one of my favorites. The throwing the leg over the back. Can you explain it?

Oh, yeah. if you're fingering a girl or a woman. Jared wrote the fingering portion of the master class, by the way, you guys. Surveised the fingered expert. Yeah, apparently. But it's the angles that make it good. And so if you're like sideways and she's, you know, laying straight,

if you put her leg over your back, it just opens her up in a way that allows your hand to get into a space and really get to the spots, specifically the A spot. Okay. I like this. I think people don't really talk much about various fingering techniques. They should. But I'll notice when my partner kind of comes in from behind is hotter. It feels better. Deeper. What do you mean from behind? Like you're in a cuddle position. Yeah. Yeah. It's not on, it's from the back. Like this? Like fingering from behind. Like up through.

Oh, okay. Yes. Like a doggy finger. I don't know. Jared probably, Jared gets it. I know. Is that weird? Are we being weird? No, that's not weird at all. All of it is good. I think we talked about this in the class too is the power of off kilter touch.

That's something that Jared does really, really well. And that essentially means you can't get bored of sex if you're being authentic and intuitive to the moment. And sometimes authentically, you're in a certain position where it's not natural to put your hand in the usual way. So you have to come from behind. So when you're responding to what's around you or how you feel or what the violence, is that day, the sex is always going to be different. And so off-kilter Dutch essentially means

touching your partner in a way that you're like, oh, that's different. It may not be like usual, but it just wakes your body up and makes you think like, oh, like that, that was interesting. Well, it grounds you. It's like, it reminds you that this is real life, you know, because it's a different touch. I know for me, what I get out of it, if I'm just going through the motions and like, oh, she likes to be grabbed this way or she likes to be held this way and this is comfortable, If I do that consistent enough, I kind of can drift mentally. But if I grab her in a way that's just like completely instinctual, that's different, that might be like weird, it kind of puts us in the moment of like, whoa, that was different. And then now we're connected.

Now you have to focus. Yeah. When we first started having sex, he wasn't into cuddling, but we were fuck buddies. We talked about this last time I was in New Yorker's podcast, how I had a cuddle buddy. Oh, right. Because Jared was not a cuddler. So I was like, that's fine with me, and I didn't really want to create that kind of pair bond with him. First of all, when we started dating, her house was so hot.

So it was less about me not liking to cuddle. I feel you on that. The temperature issue. Yes, let's get some airflow going on. I wasn't in my air conditioning phase, okay? No, when we used to fuck those skinny guys in Denver, they didn't have AC in the house. And I was like, don't touch me. Like, we were so hot.

That was summertime. Oh, that was bad. That was bad. Period. It was like so bad. It was really so hot. So many fluids. Yeah.

Okay. Okay. So what Ashley and I really gravitated towards, and you started the second episode of the master class with this, is talking about the art of seduction and sex appeal as being something that you learn. That essentially, like, I think so many people are like, well, I don't feel sexy. I don't know that I have sex appeal. I can fuck when I'm in the sexy mood.

But, like, day to day, I don't feel that I have those things. And I think that you just totally take all the pressure out by being like, yeah, we teach this. This is a learned skill. I think it is. What do you think? Absolutely. I think it's that is.

helpful for people to hear that you don't be born this way. The people that are really good at this and communicating and connecting, learned it and practiced it. So yeah, we wanted to talk with you guys. You don't have to go through every single step. But if you're listening, you guys should watch

the master class. But you really have tangible to do list, eye contact, how long to hold it, this sexy eye triangle. You know, you really, people want that. They're like, don't just tell me I need to make guy contact. Tell me how to do it and how long to do it and where to shift my eyes.

We really like the specificity of how to connect with somebody from across the room. Because the dream is me people in the wild, but I think people are like, okay, I'm in the wild, now what the fuck. So can you talk about some tips and tricks? Like you've made it to the bar, you're out. Yeah, I think first and foremost it is just making yourself approachable. We're not good actors. Leonardo is a good actor, but most of us are not good actors. So if internally, You're thinking, I'm not comfortable. I don't want to be here.

I feel awkward. As much as you're like, but I'm not showing it. Yes, you are. So it really is about first starting off with yourself. And embodiment is the notion that the mind and the body work together and that there's actually no master and then there's no control panel that they work intuitively in sync. And so sometimes if mentally you're like, I don't feel comfortable, moving your body can actually make that shift.

And oftentimes when we want a different result. we have to change more than our mind. So if you're out and you want to invite touch, you want to invite dialogue, you want to invite connection, first think about, okay, how my body is. Like, am I, you know, pelvis to pelvis with whoever it is that I want to connect with, are my shoulders down, is my purse up to indicate that I'm trying to leave right now, or is my purse down? Am I smiling? Am I relaxed? And I'm making eye contact. So going through a mental checklist that your body is communicating exactly what you want, that also, too, communicates to your brain, oh, this is like the mode that we're in right now. And there's something magnetic about somebody who is just having a good time.

So it's just really important to make sure that first and foremost and that we can all control that. I think the second thing is just there's all the tips I gave from the stripper. That to me, she was such an illuminator. There's probably more strippers I can learn from him. Jared probably has a couple tips that he learned from strippers before. Probably. But I think, yeah, like learning from the pros who like know how to approach people and who do it a lot. What do they do? What's what? work best, what are their best practices. So definitely a lot of this is derived from pickup artists.

A lot of it is derived from strippers. And then just from everyday people who found their flow. Do you guys have a thing that you do when you're out, a line that you say? I'm a big fan of eye contact and I'll make frequent eye contact. And I make a concerted effort to like smile during the eye contact maybe the second or third time. Because I don't want people to think they just happen to be in my eyesight. You know, I want them to know, like, approach me. Or she's just like staring and then like sticking with something else.

Licking her lips. I mean, I think the crossing the physical barrier is so important. If I meet somebody or I'm on a date with them, a first date, like I am clocking, whether they have touched me, whether I've touched them. I think it is the most. And some people are just touchy. Some people are just naturally like that. But I think it's so important to touch someone to show you like that.

Like, I don't mean, you know, grope them, but playful on the arm, on the knee. You know, and that feels scary to some. people, right? Like, don't you think you could be, like, flirting, be like, oh, my God, touched a stranger, you know, but that's what I think, how I express that I'm interested in somebody. Yeah, I like to take the tripper gave. She said to lead with consent because it can be like, oh, something's on your shirt. Can I get it for you? Right. Like, oh, like, your pants are really cool. Can I touch them? Can I touch your pants? Right. I mean, he does have very, his pants are fuzzy. So why would you not? He's inviting. Why would you not? It's giving grandma's couch. I want to touch that.

That's so funny. That's his erogenous zone, his shin. He's like, I can't touch my shin. Yeah, please. Oh, it's up there too. Okay. Can we talk about your sexy eye triangle? Yes. Love the sexy eye triangle. Yeah, you did it. I got turned on. I was like, oh, okay, this is, we've seen this move,

like, in the movies even. But it gets different reviews because I think some people are like, it's giving serial killer, it's giving double chin. So I think what's really important with the master class in general is to note that it's two hours of tips. We have taken in so much information. as you guys have from your plethora of books, all the work that you do as sex educators as well.

So you know that there's a take it and leave it component to everything. Some things you're like that's going to work. Some things aren't. This is not like everybody's foolproof tip. But in essence, I think it works because different levels of eye contact communicate different things. So looking somebody directly in the eye is showing attentiveness and respect. We can actually provide that to a lot of people, though, to teachers, to grandmas, etc., to puppies. looking down at somebody shows like dominance it shows strength and power looking up at somebody shows admiration

submissiveness so how do we combine all of those to make it very clear to someone that we don't mean respect maybe mean submissive but not all the way and we don't mean dominance we kind of want a mix of all three so sexy eye triangle is just that where you look somebody in the eye and then you drop your chin down look at their body and then flick it back up shame sexy we We talked about this before where people are in their head insecure about doing something that is going to make them look silly or there's probably a narrative of like that person's going to go back to their friend group and be like, can you believe that this, but no one's ever going to be like, oh, this girl looked at me, you know, from across the room, can you believe her?

What a creep, you know? So I think it's like the most innocuous but meaningful thing is looking at somebody, is eye contact. Yeah, I mean, I think most people, and I actually got a lot of shit for this, because I was like, just practice on the waiter, practice at the grocery store. Yeah. Do it in low stakes environments where you don't really care like where it leads to. When it matters, it's kind of be like riding a bike. You're practicing. Yeah.

Just do it. Flirt with people all the time. Right. You know, whenever you're, you know, going through regular life when it's not like the stakes are super high, like I don't really want this person. And I think that's, you know, some people are like, but you're leading someone on. No, but it's like, flirt with the TSA guy. Exactly. You're never going to see.

It makes everyone's experience better. I actually love that tip. I love it. I'm surprised you got shit because I think this is like any muscle that you flex. You have to like practice it. But I have a, I mean, it's probably because I'm a guy. And I said it. So they're like, oh, they got so many guys who led them on and took them on a wild group.

I think you're saying, like, look someone up and down at the airport. Exactly. Exactly. I flirt with everybody. We sat there. Remember we flirt with that security guard at the airport? Oh my God. He was looking up our podcast on his computer.

I'm like, is that a federal computer? Are you allowed to do that? We were crazy. I was upset. He didn't DM one of us. Chris? Chris from Tampa? Miss you, Chris.

Yeah, I like it. Practice the skill because I think that like it really comes natural to me. I had like a body that looked really sexual at a young age. I was always really sexual in my whole life. It comes natural to me to like lead with sex a little bit. but I don't know that that's so normal and natural for people, especially when you're also not feeling yourself that day. You're on your period.

You don't like how you look. You gain some weight or, you know, you don't like your outfit. And so I don't know that it's so natural for people to like make sexy eye contact with somebody you like at a bar. Just do it with the grocery store guy. I think TSA. That's my move. My mom is such a natural flirt. And like the way she speaks to waiters.

Like, I feel like we be at dinner. She is. My dad is like, oh, there she goes. Like my dad's like right in front of me. You know, like, she's just naturally flirt. I like watching her talk to people. Me too. Like when I was a kid, I was a little embarrassed.

Now it's what a thrill. Yeah. I hope our kids say that about us one day. A hundred percent. Yeah, that's goals. Okay, so just going to take a quick break. And I am telling you guys about Rocket Money. You guys know how it works.

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Okay, so I want to go back to something you said before because Ashley and I love this, like conversation tips from strippers. And so like you've made the eye contact, the person's walked over like now, like, what do you do? I think people are like, what the fuck do I say in the hell? So like why the strippers and what did you learn? I actually loved what the tip that she gave is that you want to approach people who want to be approached. And sometimes you don't know that until you actually go over.

So it's like looking for multiple different cues. So the first cue is to invade their bubble. Do you get the eye contact? Okay, great. But perhaps they're just thinking about their laundry list and they're zoned out and then you're just in their eyeline. So you're not sure. You caught astray.

Yeah. So then you're like, okay, I caught astray. Let me just like make sure. So I'm going to do a gesture. I might wave at the person or like look over and then look back or like make a funny face at somebody else or be like, oh, cute shoes or something. And if they're responsive, okay, maybe I'll go over. She said when you approach somebody, when you're at a restaurant and your food's coming, what do you do?

You know, shift stuff around. You make space on the table. Yeah, your food is coming. Like, you're excited. So she's like, if I'm approaching somebody and I don't notice them shift or primp or something, I just walk away. So, and that also may be that person's cute, like, oh, what happened? And that could create a stronger bond. But if she walks over and they start shifting things around, like, okay, I've got this person.

Like a guy might string his posture. Yeah. Just, you know, squaring up to you something. Like, give me something here. And then she goes over again, and it's another check, a temperature check. And this is Jared's famous line when he goes out and talks to people. What's your thing? Are you from the town?

It always changes. Like, I'll try to figure out a way to relate to that person. So I'm going to gauge for information, you know, where are you from? You know, is this your first time here? Yeah. What drink is that, you know, and then try to relate to them in some way so that they feel connected in a way. And then if they brush you off and they're cold,

it's not a rejection. It's like, oh, this is just a redirection to go somewhere else, right? I love the framing of you're not, you haven't been rejected, you've been redirected to someone that is going to be responsive. Well, you're rejected if you're like, I like you, do you like me?

That's not a redirection. That's a no. But you don't give them that chance. You don't give them the chance to shut you down. But also, too, it's like at that level, I don't know if any normal, person is just going to be super flat out mean yet. I think it's going to take a little bit of conversation to find out.

People are cold. I think you could tell. Yeah. If somebody, like, you know, I'm at the CVS and then someone's just like, oh, like you look really beautiful and I'm like, thank you. And I just walk by. That's obviously, it's just that initial line is just a seed. They didn't put any of their cards on the table, but they made that first contact.

And then you get the receptiveness or you don't. Also, like, I think there's plausible deniability that you're just trying to like make a friend. We were to a sports bar the other day. Exactly. He was this guy who was so beautiful. We were all just like, that's the hottest guy here. And I, he has a lot of tattoos and so do why. And so I was like, I just asked him what one of his tattoos was. Yeah, you did great. Thank you so much. We were watching her in action.

Everyone was just like hurting for me. And then we started talking about and it's connected to some dumb movie. And then we started talking. But like, then you're in a conversation with somebody. But also, like, if the conversation naturally kind of dies, then I don't know. As it a sports bar making a friend. Who cares? Well, how did it end? It just kind of died. talking to me about Luke Skywalker and Harry Potter.

And I was like, I'm going to go back to my group. So you, at that point, you rejected. I think if he had come over, I would have kept talking to him. It felt like it was there was like a natural end of the conversation. Which is like people are friendly, you know. So that's, I feel like that's where it gets a little dicey of like, because you never know if someone has a partner, you know, they could be not your sexual orientation. Like, I don't know.

I'm thinking of, remember that time that guy in Philly? He was really talking to me at length and really took a lot of my time up. And it was very flirty. She was trying to search for a nice way to sit. I talked to him at a close range, flirty, and then drops my girlfriend such a fan. I was like, I cannot believe you did this to me. Jared, I feel like you have, you say you have the opposite problem when you go out because he'll be talking to people. I try to throw it in there.

Early. But it makes it weird. And then he's like, oh, wait, too early is weird too. Because you're like, I don't, I wasn't as, I wasn't. I wasn't. I'm sure. I was, well, I can feel the vibe, you know? So a lot of times I just, like, pulled my hand up so that they can see.

But it just makes it weird because I'm always like, but we're cool. Like, we can still like hang and flirt and do stuff. But yeah, they don't like that. She's really chill. She's so chill, I swear. You should meet her. She's great. She can watch.

I always say, too, I'm like, okay, wouldn't if she's not, wouldn't I just lie and just take the ring off? Right. Right. And that's the thing. Jared has a lot of single friends. So he'd be going out and just wanting to be in the vibes, having a good time. So you want to just talk to people. You want to be a human being, you know, who's out at a space in a bar and you want to connect with other people.

And then if you say that you're in a relationship, it almost seems as if you're telling the other person, shut it down. But you're not. You're just trying not to be mentioned on a podcast where the person is like, for 20 minutes. Just, yeah, just be aware. And then it just gets weird after that. Then they're just like, oh. Are you guys open at all? Yeah, in theory.

We talked about this the other day. We talked with you today. We have two kids. Life is crazy. It's so busy. We can barely, we barely have time to sleep. Yeah. So like the idea of like being involved with another person right now just sounds exhausting.

Yeah. But to explain to other people who are like, wait, are they open or not? Like you guys are not 100% monogamous. Yeah. No, we're open. Okay. I think we're open to being open. Yeah.

Which, you know what? For a long time, I felt that was like a time. disappointment to people because they're like, you fuck someone or you haven't. And I'm like, there's got to be other people out there who are in the same boat as us, wherein the idea is there. I love the fact that I have that kind of freedom. I have flirt buddies. Jared has had flirty experiences. We've had definitely non-monogamous experiences before within our relationship, but I don't think in the traditional way that people think about openness that we've just gone there yet. And it's also hard. Like what? I got to find somebody else.

else who's I'm attracted to, who's attracted to me, who understands the importance and the role of my husband, who also gets it and wants whatever it is that I have available to offer. Like there's a lot of different like layers to this that make it difficult, I think. Yeah, I'm tired. At the end of the day, the stuff you do and you've kids, you've each other, if we're going to get a dating app and like meet a stranger? I don't know. I got to say, though, there are a lot of people who have been like, I was inspired by yours

and Jared's journey and like, and now we have a unicorn. I'm like, what are we doing wrong? Everybody else is like advancing so quickly. Working. Was it different before you guys had kids? I mean, you've a lot of responsibilities. Yeah, I think it was different before we had kids. We had a lot more time and the ability to connect with somebody was a lot easier back then.

Right now, I just can't see where they would fit. Yeah, but even just the flirting, I don't know. I mean, maybe there's some couples who don't even know that they're operating in an open way where they both are going out and flirting, because I don't think there's anything wrong with that. I think people want to feel sexual and desired and that they can still flirt and get that rush, but they don't want to take it any further than that.

I don't know. I'm sure people are out there, like my mom. I don't have been like that. I mean, it's weird because I don't want to see my partner do that necessarily, but I know that I have boundaries and I know I can take it up to a certain line and then I can stop. And yeah, just because you find a partner,

doesn't mean that you're just no lot, you're blind to everybody else on earth. But you could be. I think that's why there's like levels of everything is on a spectrum, right? I'm very grateful to have a partner who sits on the same space of the spectrum as me and that we're navigating it slowly, but also with a lot of curiosity and excitement. I just know from me from the beginning when I talk about sex for a living. And my previous partner would come to talks that I did. And a big part of it is making other people feel sexy.

It's flirting. It's connecting. So I brought an ex partner to a show. And then afterwards he was pissed. He just wouldn't talk to me. He's like, I felt so disrespected. You didn't let people know that you had a boyfriend. You didn't make that clear.

I'm like, well, that's going to kill the fantasy and the vibe. I brought Jared to a show I did for Playboy, and I brought this guy on stage and I tied him up. I gave him a lap dance. Jared was like, that was hot. Right. That's important to find a partner who looks at that part of you and is attracted to you. Like, I really feel like you are attracted to all of me. Yeah.

Even the parts of me that, like, spill over into the rest of the world and vice versa. And also, you know, when we first started dating, like, the number one question was like, how do you do it? Like, are you okay? And I'm like... To you about her work. Yeah. Okay.

Yeah. Yeah. I don't understand what the issue is, but I think it always stems down to like a lot of men. There's like a pressure to society to be like she is claimed. Territorial. And so I think there's like a pressure and insecurity there that a lot of men feel that I just never battled with. And also in like past relationships because I wasn't so jealous, it used to cause issues. why you're not jealous?

Like, do you not care? Right. I think it's tremendously sexy for somebody to watch their partner do something that's maybe a little outside the norm and be so proud of it. And we talk about this, Ashley and I, like, that person still, they chose you. They can have, shan's on stage talking about sex, stripping for people. She chose you at the end of the day. And there's power in that.

And you should feel confidence in that. Yeah. But if you don't, it's also okay. Totally. That's the thing. That's the compatibility factor of it. I think monogamy is so beautiful. I think when I talk to people who are like,

I only have eyes for one person. When I'm with someone, I don't even see anyone else. That sounds amazing to me. I don't relate, but that sounds incredible to me. Can we talk about NBT? Yes. Which is not a sex move. Yes.

I guess it could be. Going back to our stripper protocol. Applicable in all areas of life. Yeah. So this again is a stripper tip, which is NBT stands for never be typical. So always keeping the conversation interesting by talking about the finer, richer, more dangerous things of life.

So financial splurges, vacations, decadent foods, fantasies, sex, and then keeping the conversation both weird and sexy. And so weaving the things together, right? Like I bring up the thing of like, if aliens were here, what kind of sex thing they would have? What would be their favorite position? So, yeah, strippers just know how to keep you excited. It keeps you on the edge of your seat, the edge of life.

When we think about the topics we probably discuss on vacation, it probably is in that realm too of like the non-typical dialogues, more about like the decadent side of life. So then why not weave that into your everyday interactions? Totally. And if it's not natural to you,

I mean, you've talked about this in your class, there's such a rise and people just talking about using AI to write these type of things for you. If it's not totally natural to you, I don't know, have AI write a couple non-d, if aliens had sex, what position would that be? Because that wouldn't naturally come to me,

but I would love that conversation, you know? Yeah. And again, this is, with your partner and your marriage or whatever, or flirting with someone at a bar. I like this very like, like, don't be basic kind of thing. Yeah.

Yeah. They actually say that there's like five levels of communication that go from facts, routines, opinions, feelings, and then diversity of thought, which means like letting somebody

into your inner world where like things collide, they don't always make sense, you're questioning things. And so in most long-term relationships, people actually stay between levels one and three. They're just communicating about routines, and facts and opinions,

but they don't talk about feelings. They don't talk about their inner world because you just get into that rut. So almost especially in long-term relationships should you go by the NBT rule. I think it can be very natural for people with children to only talk about the children. Or even me and Ashley,

we have to remember to joke around about stuff. You know? So much about the tour and work and two episodes a week and the guests and what's it going to be about. And we have to remember that we're like friends. Yes. And we don't just run businesses together. I love the shrug with it.

We're friends. Most days. But you guys work together too. Yeah. You're business partners and parents together. Do you have to like remember like also we're like we're still fuck buddies? Yeah. Yeah.

We do. We do. And I mean, I don't know. Do you find it difficult to separate the two sometimes? I don't. But I think that you're pretty good at it. When we go on a date night, I feel like Jared forgets that I'm his wife in a positive way. In a hallway?

Yeah. Because I see like I see you what you'd be like on a date with people. Yeah. You just talk about really random topics. You just go. So I love that. I think that you're naturally pretty good at that. And if we're not, you have to just be manual about it, like you said.

Practice or think about it. Practice. Prep. Yes. Write it down. Right. Here's the question I'm going to ask tonight on my date and I with my husband. And this is the gifts, too, of the work that we do is that, like, I'm always inundated

with new ideas, with like fresh concepts. So I feel like that's something that you allow me to take the lead on. Yeah, definitely. I mean, we have the same interests, you know, what connected us in the beginning was like talking about philosophy or talking about the world or, you know, we go to restaurants and be like, what is, what do you think everyone here is doing right now for work? Or, you know, just having conversations that I find it's easier now because we know each other so well.

So, you know, just having those discussions are huge, especially at dinner. Yeah. But then there's a large percentage of our day is just levels one through three. Yeah. And that's cool, too, because I like to get shit done. Yeah, like your kids have to be taken care of. Right. Yeah.

We barely talk at work, actually. Yeah, we barely talk at work. Yeah. And then when the kids are around, it's mostly like, does she have underwear? Did you get socks? Right. Did she brush her teeth? Is she fed?

How much TV time did you say yes to this? Because I'm about to say no. Like, that's the dialogue. So is there like a significant amount of mental gymnastics that allows you to like look at your partner through a different lens of like not just the parent. Is it second nature now? I think one of the gifts that parenting has, I'm curious about your guy's lives right now. Our life is very structured.

Yeah. So kids provide a lot of structure. and a lot of routine. So I know what I'm doing every day from 7 a.m. to 9 a.m. I know what I'm doing from 9 to 5. I know what I'm doing from 5 to 8. And I know after 8 p.m.

is a time that I get to be a human being. And I know this. So my brain already just naturally goes into these flows because this is my life every single day. Do you feel like your life has structure? Yes. Very much. Now more than seven years ago.

Like, I mean, my partner just moved in. So now that feels even more structured where like we go to bed at this time. We wake up. We cook dinner. But we don't have to. We could also be like, let's go crazy and go out. You know, like it doesn't. We can be spontaneous.

We don't have kids. You know, no offense. No, that sounded nice. That sounded like a fantasy. It's certainly gotten more structured. I don't know. We operate when we're like touring or whatever. Like our life is so like exciting and crazy and chaotic.

And then when we're not, it's just a little more. relaxed and structured, I guess. I think Ashley and I are very prepared and we know we have to get done and that allows us actually to let go with some of the structure. So every morning, the first thing I do, I pour a cup of coffee, I make a list. I have two lists. On the left hand side, it's work. On the right hand side, it's personal life.

And just looking at that and saying to myself, this is the goals for the day. This is what's important. That's the structure I provide myself. And then I can deviate from that. Like, that helps me to feel in control and then I can kind of flow with my day. Yeah, I mean, in the relationship side of it, like, he and I were long distance for a really long time. So, like, things had to be planned out. Like, he surprised me once flew here.

You know, that was really special. But, like, otherwise, we had to kind of, like, sit down and open our laptops and, like, book, travel and flights to make sure it, like, worked out with his schedule, my schedule, our tour schedule. So, like, we entered in the relationship with a little less ability to be so spontaneous because of the distance. So I don't know. I like both. I think you can ebb and flow in your life. Like, you don't have to be cool. crazy structure type A all the time and then, you know, spontaneous type B. I don't know. I think

you can like flow between the two. Yeah. I mean, we value structure so much right now that it's like so huge. I don't think we could operate and have a healthy dynamic between our relationship and have a healthy work lifestyle without the structure. And kids who are alive. And kids who are alive. And what about your sex life? Like do you find that to be structured or is that still spontaneity or how? A mix of both. You know, there's times where, you know, even just like a quick thing, like, are we making love tonight? You know, even like a quick thing that, and it's just even early, it's like, oh, I'm looking forward to it now. I can think about it.

And then it is kind of scheduled. Or, you know, I always say we go on like spurts. So like there'll be a time, like if that well gets broken every day for a few weeks, it's going to be every day. But then there's times where we're just tired. We can't do it, you know. Yeah, I would say it's more structured. I would say like to go back to that point, I think that. we had a harder time before kids going from work mode into lovers mode because there's like no

clear ending for where one thing had to end. So now there's like these really clear separations. Of late, we've been launching a few things. So when the kids go to bed, we go to work. And even like last night, we were supposed to work late and I was like, yeah, let's just go to bed. Like because if we get into this flow, then there's no time for that. So I think they just create this like natural forced structure in our lives. But we used to have day sex. We don't have that anymore. So that's the thing to pass. Now it's got to be... Maybe today.

No, we got to go back and talk to that lady. We're in a time limit at all times. Can I ask you guys what the self-talk is like, because I'm sure you've mastered this? So you'll have times where you're just fucking every day, every night, it's amazing. And then you go through these drier spells. Like, what is the self-talk that helps you to overcome the, like, is this our new normal forever? It never comes into my head. I mean, do you feel that?

When we're in the dry spirit, like, is this going to be how it's forever? Not now. But, like, we're just at the best. benefit. We're coming up on like 10 years of fucking, you know what I mean? So we've been married for six. I think that we're just at a different place now. We were talking to the day. So I define great sex as giving freedom to explore new things, try new kinks, explore different sexualities, explore yourself, freedom from any limiting beliefs that tell you that you don't have access to your body. You can't do something because you're too young, you're too old, you're too white, you're too black, you're too fat,

you're too thin. So freedom from just to be like, no, there's no script that tells me how I can explore and delight in my own humanity. And then lastly, is freedom not to, which essentially means, like, not having sex is an act of good sex. Saying no is an act of preserving your yeses for when it really matters and you can really be in it. So you need all of those components to have a great sex life. So I think through the years, we've just touched on different phases of working on each one. And we had to dismantle so many of our belief systems when we were becoming parents. So there was so many things I had to get freedom from. I remember after I had my second kid, like my body went back to the way that it looked.

My clothes fit, but they didn't suit me. And I was like, what am I now? Who am I? And I had to really realize were a lot of the ways I was thinking about myself and my sexual self, things that were told to me or things that I believed now. And then where was the marriage between the two? So I think going through those phases naturally and then coming out on the other side of it and still loving each other and still loving the sex that we've had has just given us

the confidence to feel like, yeah, if we go through a dry spell, we know that's for a good reason. Like, again, saying no to sex for a period of time because you don't want to means the sex coming up is about to be really, really fire. Yeah. I think you talked about that on our last episode, just the seasons. I think you were maybe one of the first guests that kind of used that language that I really liked. And I think kids obviously play a huge part in that.

But even if you don't have children, like life. goes in seasons. So I do think people, like the question you asked is just like people start to panic if it's been a while. They're like, this is it. It's over. Yes. The passion's gone. And to that point, you speak about that as well, like when the passion goes or the honeymoon phase is over, but that lends itself to freedom. Can you explain kind of what that means? Yeah. There's a delicate balance there. And I went through this during pregnancy too of like going with the flow versus is fighting the current. And you're going to have to intuitively know

when it's time to do either one. There's going to be times in your life where you have to fall into the season and be like, you know what? It's just a dry spell right now. It's the way that we're in. Let the current just take me where it's meant to. And there's other times where you have to be like,

this doesn't feel right. I'm going to fight against the current. And it's going to feel like a struggle, but we're going to create a new momentum. We're going to create a new normal together. So I feel like we've gone through both periods where we've just accepted. Yeah, the vibe is just not there.

Let's just let it sit. And times where, as Jared, will say like, what do you always say? I always say, I'm not going to let life make me it's bitch. So I'm going to fight back. Yeah. I'm going to fight back. Yeah.

And that's when you're just like, no, I'm not sleeping. But guess what? Yeah. He came five times last night. Damn. He didn't. He didn't. We literally last night, I literally looked at Jared because he's feeling a little sick right now.

And then I was like, our classic question, I'm like, do you want to have sex tonight? And then he was like, I will. But I'm tired. I will. Well, can I never have a bad time. Right. How could you with her? Yeah.

I might not be like, oh, I got to get myself ready to do this. But then like when I'm in the act, I'm like, yeah, this is great. I'm glad I made the decision. So there's never a time that I choose to have sex. I'm like, I wish I didn't do that. So the whole, the master class is about sex appeal. So like if you're just like I'm not feeling it right now, if the general people are just like, I don't feel sexy, I don't feel in the mood.

Do you have like good tips or tricks? She's really good at this conversation because there's a lot of times there's like fire escapes that she can go through to like figure it out like maybe it's the way that we have been approaching each other on our intimate side or maybe it's like you call it chore play or like maybe there's just something about me that's not turning my partner on all the way so let me like kind of diagnose and figure out what it is sometimes not as obvious and they might not even know it's probably subconscious it's not as obvious as like oh you I haven't watched the dishes, but it's like, you know, there's an approach that you're doing

that's just they're not finding attractive. What's chore play? Yeah, so this is turn on triggers. Good segue. This is my guy, okay? This is my guy. Turn on triggers in essence is when you first get into a relationship, you don't have to think about starting the fire.

You just look at the person and you're like, and especially long distance relationship, I'm sure it was on site, right? And now that you live together, it actually would be pretty inconvenient if it was on site because... I'd have fear. about this. How do you go from long distance to move being together all the time? Yes.

I don't want to cut you off. But yeah. But yeah, you have to actually embrace the fact that the passion isn't always there. You have to embrace the fact you not have to create the fire. It's not just natural. So turn on triggers is a way of starting the spark. And then the other person has to pick that up and say, okay, do I want to carry the flame now? And so people have different turn on triggers.

Some people's is direct. Mine is direct. I need really direct compliments about how I am turning you on. I don't want to just hear that you're horny. I want to be like, yo, that dress is fucking hugging your curves and I want to hump you. Like it's got to be something that's like you are making me like that. Jared's turn on trigger. He's more of essentialist.

For him, things have to be clean. The smell has to be right. He has to feel like he feels sexy, like in his body. He likes temperature. Temperature. Yes. So he's a sensualist. And so I have to keep that in mind.

Like sometimes for me, if I'm getting horny, I might just want to say something. but then if I know that the setting around or if he's tired, it's just not going to be his vibe or his energy. Chor play is in essence for people who are like, I'm mentally overwhelmed right now. So it's really hard for me to drop into my body when I feel like I have 50 things I have to do as soon as we finish this.

So if you just took off 10 things off my list, I might have the mental space to consider fucking yo ass. I think that chore play really resonates for people, especially parents, or people who live together. When you're like, yeah, I'd find you horny if you wash the dishes like you said that you would. Yeah, create an environment for me that I feel like I want to get fucked up off my plate. Yeah, take something off my plate so I can actually like focus and like drop into this.

And then you have the cat and mouse or the pursuer. I'm actually very big on this too. This is something I really missed from the beginning of our relationship. Relationships, period. I love what I call erotic ambiguity, which in essence is that delicious space where we know that we have sexual chemistry. We know we both want to have sex, but we don't know if sex is going to happen. and you get to play and be like,

I don't really know I'm feeling kind of tired or I don't know if I should do it. I'm not sure. And then I want to be chased and pursued. And so when you're in a relationship, it almost becomes assumed, right? Like, okay, if we both have the time, if we're both willing, we're going to have sex.

And even during foreplay, I love erotic ambiguity. I still want you to feel like you may not get to put the tip in. And I want you to want to like try to convince me during it. So that might be someone's turn on. So for them playing hard to get is not actually a no. It's an invitation for you to try harder to get the yes. Oh, I love it. So can we talk a little bit about like in other words, in a sexy vibe,

like picking who your sexual icon is or the type of seductress you want to be and like getting drawing inspiration from that? Okay, let me ask everybody here the question. Who is your sexual icon? Okay, so I thought about this. Obviously, I wanted to be prepared. Raina, I know you're so easy. Yours is so easy.

It's Sabrina Carver. What do you mean? I guess I don't think of her as my sexual icon. Right? It's like so obvious. I guess I like threw back to like Marilyn Monroe. I like this like coquette. No.

Sabrina Carpard on stage with the blowjohns and their outfits. She's very overt. I am a little more overt. I'm not really like coquettish. But you just are her. I thought you wanted to be her. This is crazy to me that there's any discussion. I guess I think about a sexual icon as somebody I've thought about for a long time.

You're obsessed with her. She's all you've ever wanted. She's your true Gail King. I'll let you guys talk and I'll come up with a better one. You can't come up a better one. It's Sabrina Carpenter. We've all decided that. You're done here.

I want to say Beyonce because, but I don't think it's that. But the reason why is because I love that she is like a bad bitch, but she still is like I have a soft girl side and I want to please my man and I don't have to always be like they have that nice flow. But she's not as the personality type you call it like a no fucks. She's not. She's more reserved. You don't really feel like you know her so much. Like, she kind of keeps it in the box, and that's just not my personality at all. So then I just kind of went with Rihanna. I just, I am a person that's like, I'm in charge. I have a dominant personality, but I still want to, like, be submissive with my partner and, like, please him, and you can do both. And so I like when women show that. But Rihanna is also just like, I don't give a fuck and she'll say whatever. where Beyonce is just like she's robotic almost. She gives all the fucks.

Yeah. She deeply fucks with all the fucks. Right. So. All right. So who are y'all's sex icons? 90s, early 2000s, Brad Pitt. I did not.

Okay. So the sex icon that you're just like, see that person emulate it? No. You know what's actually, you guys have all done a great job here because what the purpose of this really is is most people are going to identify someone that they think is like, this person has everything that I want, that I don't have. but similarity attraction theory says that we're attracted to people who are just like us.

So you are actually a lot like your sexual icon. You just probably haven't made those pathways, but you have made the pathways. Just like Sabrina Carpenter. You'd be on stage, giving head to a microphone. You've got the blonde hair, you have the lid. She's funny. Yeah. So that's not the theory is pick the sexual icon.

The purpose of this activity, so this is the Three Rivers activity we did, it's to identify the ways that you already are dripping in sex appeal. So not everything is something that you have to get, right? Our self-help culture tells us that we always think something more or aspire to something new. A lot of the times we already have so much existing for us. So when we think about sex appeal, we see this giant ocean that we have to fill up. And so the three rivers are like, what three ways are you already dripping in sex appeal?

What three ways is your river already running over? And so when you think about your sexual icon, that's the way that you already have it. yes there's probably ways you can aspire but most people when you start really thinking about it you're like oh yeah shit like I am a lot like Dorothy Dandridge I can actually see how I'm drawn to her not just because she has everything that I want

but because she has a lot of things that I already have Are that yours? What's yours? I said Dorothy Dandridge I don't even know where that came from because that's a good thing to pull out. That it is yours. Really truly it's Hallie Berry really and truly it is Hallie Berry Hallie played Dorothy Dandridge so when I'm reflecting on

Dorothy Dandridge I'm actually thinking of Hallie playing that role Okay. What about her? Are you excited? I think she's, I mean, who wouldn't want to be like Holly Berry? Yeah. I just think she is like innocent and powerful. And I'm saying that because I'm like, I'm not really innocent. But there's like an innocence and a powerfulness. And just like a deep knowingness to Hallie. And I feel like she's never unsure, even if she is. And now she talks about sex too, which is like so phenomenal. Finally, we got there. I know. Well, can I talk about the Brad Pitt thing? Yeah. Yeah. I'm just why. I'm just curious. I just feel like he gets it, especially that era of him. I feel like in interviews and the way he acted, you know, in the movies. I don't know. I feel like he just, he calls it.

That's the architect to be like. I like the conversation about like the art of seduction and the type of seductresses that there are and what you gravitate towards because like some people would automatically gravitate towards a sports illustrated model or a playmate. That's not really where my head goes or an old-timey actress. Like it's funny that like it's musicians for us. like current musicians? Yeah, I mean, I was like, who am I pulling from?

I don't know. I thought about it. Obviously, Beyonce's the first person that just comes to mind, but I'm like actors and actresses. I don't know, it's tough to know who they really are. I think we know who musicians are a little bit better than actors. I've always kind of felt like that. Like, I mean, they could still be playing a role.

But a playmate didn't come to mind for you. Yeah. Or like a comedian. It's Nikki. Nicky Clixer. But I just think, like, for me, what it was about him was, he was like, mysterious. You know, I read like an article where he used to like build a fire before he goes to sleep.

Just like interesting stuff about him that just made me go, that's, that's kind of how I want to be. Yeah. He was like the OG sexiest man alive. You know, like back when that was like a real. Oh my God. Avere award. Esteemed award. Now they can't even get anyone to do it.

But is that how that guy got this award this year? That's what they say. People don't want it as much. Like, of course they would have had Glenn Powell. Yeah. Yeah. you know, Miles Teller. Is that what like the subheading was of the article?

Of course we would have had Glenn Powell. That was the subheading. Because everyone's mad in the comments. Like, why isn't it Glenn Powell? People like, obviously we want to get a cow. No one wants this anymore. It's not like what it used to be. We only a couple of minutes left.

So I thought maybe if you guys want to close out with your best tip for bringing sex appeal to the table. If there's one thing you can do today to just ignite your sex appeal inside. I'll give a tip. that was actually my first lesson ever on sex appeal. We had a girl in our group of friends who was my friend's cousin. So she was the tag-along friend. And her name was Anna.

She always wore brown. Plainest personality, most boring his voice. Definitely like the dud of the group. But it was my friend's cousin, so she was always around. Whenever we would go out, everybody would flock to Anna. And we would be so confused because we had our airbrushed T-shirts, our airbrushed air forces. We had like lime green picks in our hair.

We were big. We were boisterous. We were loud. We were doing all the things. The sexy eye triangle. We were flirting. We're like, why does everybody flock to Anna? Went to celebrity basketball game once.

And we were in the bleachers having a ball, doing all the right things. And then lo and behold, the game ends, the biggest celebrity, both in size and also in like meteoric status, comes up to the bleachers towards our group. And we're all like, it's happening. We're going to the penhouse. And he walks right up to. Anna. We were like, the fuck. So after he left, she got the number. We were like, Anna, what is going on? And she's like, oh, when I see a guy that I'm attracted to, I just look

him in the eyes and I picture having sex with him. Or yes, Anna? Yeah. Okay, Anna. She just pictured sucking their dick. And she manifests. I actually do this whenever I get my photo taken. Like, if I'm doing headshots and taking pictures, I always look into the camera and picture myself having sex with. the camera person. Okay. Yeah. I love this.

Right. I think if you are, if you do that, it's written all over your face. It's like you're exuding it. Like literally, like telepathically. Yeah. Fucking somebody. It's the new eye fucking. It's the new I fucking.

Right. And it also sounds like she's not the girl in the group that's the loudest, the dress the craziest. Like it's just, it's a quiet confidence almost. But I think if I'm just like looking at you really start to imagine it, your lips are going to flush. Your breathing's going to become shallow. your pupils are going to dilate, your shoulders are going to drop, your voice is going to drop, you're going to start to do all the cues. We're all designed to be able to interpret sexual cues.

Like we're all here because our ancestors were able to successfully do that. So if you're doing that and you can really put yourself in there, like that's a very good talent to have because she must have an amazing imagination. Imagination. It's so funny though because if you start doing it and then you're like, and then you're just looking at someone like, ew, I actually don't want it. It's like, if you're imagine having sex is someone and then you turn. That's not happened to you like the grocery store? I actually think they wouldn't be good. Then you're just looking at someone like,

but you can't just like have the thought cross your mind. Because I, you know, men think about sex all day long. So it can't be like, oh, I'm a fucker. No, like you have to using your imagination. Actually go there, take their clothes off, see their body for the first time, touch them for the first time. Get close and smell them. Make out with them.

Like grab their bulge. You have to do all of that in your mind. Wow. Okay, Anna. So stop listening to your friends out in public. All right, Jared. follow up with that. No, you have to do it.

That's the tip. You've got good ones. I don't know what I'm going to follow up with that. Or if you, okay, so like what's something that is unexpectedly really sexy when you meet somebody out that like people don't even know they're being sexy. Oh, that's a good question. I think for me, you know, the thing that I've noticed that will catch my eye is clothing. I think it's a language, you know, if you're trying to attract someone that's in the same,

you know, I guess interest area, you might. wear a piece of clothing that is like really exclusive or really this and I kind of notice it and then it just opens up a conversation or you know us to connect and I know that your interest areas are the same as mine but it's not as good as like picturing having sex with her. That's actually a pro tip though. It really is. When I did my book, we did makeovers and one of the girls have this amazing curly hair and I was like I know what I'm going to do I'm going to give you this like cascading throw over haircuts. It's going to be really sensual, give you highlights and she was like, no, I want to dye it green and I want to mullet. And I was like, okay, Maya, let's talk.

fuck about this. Like the purpose is to draw people in, but within her given community, that look hit. So understanding the language of seduction within your given culture, because seductiveness is a secret, like the mystery component of it. And the secrets are better when someone gets to intuitively know it. Like, I'm in on the secret with you. So before we even exchange words, we have this moment. So I think it is so important to know who do you want to attract? And like what can you wear or do that communicates like, you already know me. Well, and everything sends a message. I used to say when I was doing a red lip for a minute and like I never got so much attention.

I think it's just like a bold statement, you know, and this is back in Atlanta. I don't really fuck with a red lip much anymore, but I don't know what it was. There's one weekend I went out. I was like whatever it's saying, because I think it's confident and bold to do like, you know. I love your red nails. Oh, the nails get a lot of attention too. So I used to do neon green nails and there was not a man alive that did not comment on them, every single man and red nails as well.

constantly commenting too. Yes. All these things are like subtle messages. Totally. That invite conversation. I mean, if a man compliments me on my nails, that might be a line that every man on earth knows. I don't care.

I love it. I love one of guys like, I love your manicure. I'm like, let's fuck. They're like, he's like, it reminds me of my mom. Do you want these fingers in your butt? That's what it is.

There's a whole thing of red nail theory and like why men are attracted to it. And a lot of it comes from like their moms. Wow. Yeah. This is amazing. And Ashley and I encourage everybody to watch your class on Masterclass and also I listened to your book on Audible and I like listening to

you narrate it and I just real friends that's a good book to listen to it's a good book to listen to I really enjoyed it it's just an added level of fun we played with your vibrators oh we're gonna send you home with vibrators yeah we have a new cochering we love it's so well congratulations it's called the bond band yeah it's really fun we'll tell everybody else where they can find everything your Instagram your website your podcast everything I'm going to plug the class on class. It is the greatest work that I've done in my life. And I'm so grateful that my partner got to be a part of it. It was such a dream come true to have you on set. Yeah. No, it was fun. It was a good time. And then, you know, where can they just do no follow? No nothing, no

Instagram. Well, I think you get one wish with people. I feel like you could confuse them. Are you the person that taught us that the one wish? Maybe. I always think about it. I think you get one wish. Maybe it was Shan. Yeah. I do that for sure because then it's just like, I'm not going to go to 70 different clicks. Right. I just say masterclass.com slash Shan. Actually, the person that would is going to find you off a masterclass. Jared gets one wish. So you can plug her, whatever. Oh, yeah, there we go.

Or your own. Jared gets a wish. No, something I'm really excited about is Shan's podcast that we've been working on. And that is going to be coming out. It's called Lovers by Shan. Jared Crave directed it. It's stunning. It's actually really, really special.

I hope that we're going to change the game. I hope next time I'm on the show in a few years, you're just copying our style. We think it's that good. Wait, did you post was your first guest? It's going to be Rihanna? No, that was like a fantasy. That was her one wish. That was my one wish.

You posted about it of what you got at anything. Yes. Yes. Our first guest is Mario. So same. Oh. I love it. As people often say.

Yeah. Favorite dog. Yeah. Tell Mario what's up. Okay. And our website is Girls Gotta Eat.com. Girls Got Eid podcast on Instagram and TikTok. I'm Ash Has.

Rain is Rayna's. Rainebord. This is too many wishes. And you can subscribe on YouTube. And we'll see you guys on Thursday. Have a good week, guys.