Girls Gotta Eat - Are All Guys a Little Bi? feat. Comedian Jay Jurden

Episode Date: August 15, 2021

We have the hilarious and hot Jay Jurden in the studio talking about bisexuality, throuples, and more. He shares his journey of realizing his sexuality and coming out, plus we discuss why straight women fear dating a bisexual guy, why a lot of "straight" men are a little bit bi, and how his throuple works. And we pop off about Gen Z fashion and guys in flip flops. Before Jay joins us, we dissect a DM slide Ashley received and give advice surrounding it, and Rayna feels seen by a recent celeb controversy. Enjoy! Follow Jay on Instagram @JayJurden and check his website here. Follow us @GirlsGottaEatPodcast, Ashley @AshHess, and Rayna @Rayna.Greenberg. Visit our website for tour dates, merchandise, and more. Thank you to our partners this week: DailyHarvest: Get $40 off your first box at dailyharvest.com/gge. Article: Get $50 off your first purchase at article.com/gge. Candid: Visit candidco.com/gge + code GGE for your risk-free starter kit and $75 off. Feals: Become a member at feals.com/gge and get 50% off your first order + free shipping. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

I mean, I like my male friends who I also work out with to have cakes. Right. And you're like, what? Why do we care so much about our booties if we ain't a little bit by? Right. Of girls got to eat. Welcome back. Heat wave.

Weather report. It's hot as shit. New York's like, hey, don't use your electricity. We're like, fuck you. Did you ever see, like, the last time they sent that Amber alert out for, did you get the Amber Alert? It's not an Amber Alert. Well, it sounded like what I'm saying.

It's like an answer. Amber alerts when a child gets kidnapped. Ray, I know. The Connet alert? Yes, but I, the way, they've no one had it gotten that before. It was the loud, it was louder than an Amber alert. I get emails every day from Connett that says heat advisory. Yeah, but don't use your electricity.

Did you get the thing where your phone buzzed like crazy? No. You didn't get Amber Alerts for the heat. Everybody got it. No. This was like the last time we had this crazy heat wave. New Yorkers know that we got like a crazy loud, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, louder than any Amber Alert you've ever received.

And it was Con Ed being like, turn off your washing. and dryers, turn off your AC. We're like, oh, for real. And all the tweets were like, y'all turn off Times Square first. That's so true. People were like, turn off the Ferris wheel and the M&M store first.

The Empire State Building gets lit up with a different light show every night. Like, why are you doing that? We're like, read the room, New York. We're going to keep our a seat. I had to do laundry. I was like, can I do laundry? I was like feeling like,

like people were spying on me. If someone's going to call you and be like, Ashley, we know you're doing this. And I was like, I got to do it. I did it on cold. They're never going to know. I know you got that. You must have been like taking a nap with Kane or something.

Kane loves to nap. Kane loves naps. Last week, I spelled calm wrong. And I spelled it clam. The person who has to like correct us for this also was so sweet. She was like, I love clams too. No, our like sales manager. Like I, in the moment I spelled it and was like something feels off.

And then even when I was editing, And I was like, is that right? And my brain just wouldn't go there. Like, I thought about it. I didn't just like willy-nilly like that smelled right. I thought about it. I even, when I listened back, there was a pause. Like, C-L-A-M is such a rolls off the tongue.

So much more than C-A-L-M. Like, do it right now, everybody. What's easier to spell, clamor cough? C-L-A-M, C-L-A-M, C-L-A-L-M. Right, you know? C-L-L-A-M rolls off the tongue more. That's what I'm saying. And we changed it.

We got a message like 9 a.m. Like, hey, can you fix this from like our ad network? And I just was like clam.com. Like, I don't even want to know what that is. It's probably a poor thing. Yeah, I looked it up. Did you? No one owns it.

It's just like it like directs you to like something. Because you said clam.com and I looked it up. Okay. But it does roll off the tongue. And I've made those mistakes before. During COVID, I messed up some other thing that was sort of like that. And it was early in the morning, like 7 a.m. It was raining and I was walking across the bridge.

and our ad sales manager was like, you mess this up. And I was like, I'm going to jump off his bridge. It was like the lowest of the low. I was like quarantined alone. I was seeing like one friend per week. It was 7 a.m. And our sales manager was like, you fucked up. And I was like, I can't handle this right now.

I forget what it was. I wish we could laugh about it. I messed up ads two weeks in a row. It's like we hadn't messed up an ad in years. And I messed up in two weeks in a row. And I don't remember what it was. But I was like, should I tell Ashley or just jump off his bridge? It was.

It was a pandemic. What else was I doing besides going back in and doing, you know? Well, I feel like emotions were high. Like, we weren't okay. Not you and me, but like individually. Like, we weren't. I was not all right. Right.

I was crying a lot in public. That is so crazy to get bad news on a bridge. And you're like, what if I just went for it? During a pandemic. Yeah, starting a pandemic. You're like, I have nothing left to live for. I messed up our whole business. I'm just kidding.

It's not funny. I'm not going to jump off a bridge. Oh, I thought you went fucking up the business. I was like, that's not funny. None of this is funny. Oh my gosh. Okay, so you guys stormed the store.

Oh my God. We released all new merch. You guys went Buck Wild on the merch. I never knew I said Storm the Store, but we released. Did you know you said Buck Wild? Because that feels new. Buck Wild. I was trying to get something to replace with Storm the store.

Any excuse to bring up Buck? Oh, you got you? Fuck, fucks. But yeah, we released all new merch last week. It's so gorgeous.

There's sets. There's tie dyes. There's embroidery on the sleeves. There's stickers. Drinkware. Everything. It looks amazing. You guys have been really excited

about everything we have. So we're excited that you guys bought it. GirlsGuttypodcast. Shop. Yes. And I saw probably the most request for dog stuff. I'm sitting here literally with my hand on Azul right now. I feel like we should do dog stuff at some point.

Next drop. And we have a model. I mean, Azul, did you guys see the photos on the website? site of Azul. Also, Jeremy was here. Our friend Jeremy is taking all the photos.

He took more photos of Azul than he did about us. When he sent them to us. The fact that I ever questioned that Azul would be a girl's got to eat icon. He's great for the color scheme. I know. He really blends in. Tomorrow, Azul is meeting Dr. Lisa.

Wait, I didn't know that. Yeah. We're going to have like an outdoor brunch. But with the heat wave, I was like, we just are probably going to go to Boris and Horton. And so Azul can be inside because he can't like sit outside with us. but she hasn't met him.

Oh, I love her. It's going to be really nice for her. I know, and that's my, you guys are new here. That's my vet and, like, angel in life. She was on our show in January of 2020, her, Richie, her boyfriend. And we have another really exciting announcement, not that Azul meeting his bed was an announcement, but we have live show announcement. We added a Minneapolis night two.

We are sorry. We didn't have it before. We've been working on this. We didn't think we were going to be able to do this, but we are. So it is going to be the following night after the first show, which is October 13th. So the second show is going to be Thursday, October 14th. Same venue, Fillmore, Minneapolis. And tickets are on sale now, are they?

Yeah. As this comes out? Uh-huh. Monday morning. Yeah, we're so excited. Those went so quick. And we were like, fuck, we should have known. And we just want to be there with all the Minneapolis snack heads.

We love the city. We love performing for you guys. So we have a second show added. You can grab those tickets and get them quick. Yeah. And finally we get to announce Texas. I am so excited. It's the first round of tickets that we canceled during COVID.

I had a good cry about it. And we are excited to come back. So Houston, Dallas, we will see you early January. We were so excited. So Houston, we'll be there on January 13th. And Dallas, we'll be there on January 15th. If you guys already had tickets to those shows, thank you for holding on.

on to them. They will be honored. You can get those tickets on Wednesday, August 18th, both of those shows. And you're like, wait, Austin, what? We actually had a great opportunity to come to Austin sooner. So we are going to do that. Ashley and I are headlining Moon Tower Comedy Festival. That is going to be Saturday night, September 25th, at the Paramount Theater. We have two shows. It is going to be unbelievable, really cool. So if you guys bought tickets to emoes in Austin, if you still have those tickets, you should get an email today. That's Monday, August 16th, with your refund. And you guys can go ahead and buy new tickets. It's at a new theater. And those tickets will be available. All the tickets for all the Texas shows on Wednesday, August 18th. We are so excited. This is an awesome festival.

We've always wanted to do it, you know, kind of last minute. I feel like someone dropped out. They won't say that that happened, but I'm like, you know what? Whatever. We'll take it. You know what's so funny is that I was asking on these logistical questions to our agent. I was like, Is it going to cost more for our audience? Is it going to screw them? Are they going to get refines? Ashley, I just goes, who dropped out? Listen, the lineup was announced in like June.

They're like, yo, can girls got to eat, come to Austin? No, so we, you know, if this is an inconvenience, we apologize. Like, you know, this is just kind of this opportunity got presented to us. We're really excited about it to get to get to headline this festival. More tickets, right? So more people from Austin will be able to come see us. So we hope that that is an added bonus here. Again, we apologize if this doesn't work for you.

But again, we'll be in Dallas and Houston in January. If you can't make it to this, you could come to those. We're doing the best we can. We really want to do this festival. Lots of fun, former Girls Got to Eat Guests. We'll be there too. I was talking to Francis about it the other night. Mary Beth Barone, Andrew Schultz, I believe, all kinds of people.

So hopefully we'll have some surprise special guests at these shows. It'll still be your standard girls' got to eat show, of course. But yeah, we're headlining this festival. I'm super excited about it. Yeah, if you're not from Texas, come down. It'll be a really fun festival in general. Yeah, lots of shows, like all throughout the city. Austin's a great city.

Obviously, we love it. And there are still tickets left in Charlotte. There are a few left as of this moment. Atlanta, there are a few left. Charleston tickets left. We have an amazing opening act. We just booked. We're so excited about Charleston.

Love the city. Love all these cities. Some tickets left in Phoenix. We have two shows in Phoenix in October, and then Cancun at the Just for Last Festival. JFL escapes. There should be tickets of, I don't know, we don't get really info on that. But we'll be there.

We'll be in Kankton. You know, we'll be there. And New York and Chicago. So those are our holiday shows. New York is going to be December 5th. Chicago's December 10th. Incredible holiday shows. You guys know we go so ham on these holiday shows.

They're different. They're special. We have all these different performances and acts, everything. They're just wild. So get those. I've been meeting girls at my stand-up shows that are coming to those. They're coming to New York. They're coming to Chicago.

So those are going to be epic. I rarely use that. So just trust. And you can get tickets to all of these at GirlsGuttyupoddypodcast.com. Yes. And if you guys want to watch ahead of time, always sign up for a newsletter. We'll send us that ahead of time via the newsletter. And you can get that on our website.

There's a pop-up when you log in. Yeah. If you got the newsletter, you already know all this. You already have the Minneapolis tickets. You already have Minneapolis tickets. You're coming to Austin. Listen, if you guys are complaining, you're like, well, they sell out. But you don't sign up a newsletter?

You're not a newsletter. That's on you. Yeah. On the newsletter. So that's all there. We cannot wait to come to all these cities. and we're really excited. And we have tour march.

Buy the tour march. Yeah, get the tour merge. Online. Slut it out. Crop the sleeves. Crop, make it a crop top. Or not. Cozy up with a sweatshirt.

I need, I need to stop. In Austin. Yeah, it's like cozy. A million degrees. And you guys, while we're here, share this show. We haven't asked you to share the show in years. Yeah.

Yeah. Rate, review. Well, you know, only a few nice things to say. But go on iTunes, leave a five star. helps our show, follow us on Spotify, and then please share us in your Instagram stories to your friends. How cool is it to help your friends discover amazing content? Yeah. And, you know, if there's something your friend is struggling with, like she is not good at, I don't know, taking nudes or she needs help with her dating profile or he or she or whatever. Just, you know,

find an episode and be like, I feel like you could use this. Don't, don't like throw shade about it. Don't be like, hey, you seem like your life's in shambles. Maybe what if you were like, it seems like you're sucking dick ability as it shambles. So I would like to introduce you to this podcast. The number one thing that people tell me when I run into them on the street and stuff is I discovered you guys during a breakup. A friend recommended you to me during the breakup. So I'm a few friends who are struggling with that. Infidelity.

The Astro episodes great. Anything. We have it. We have it for you. It's cataloged on our website. And I get asked a lot about people know that I lost Dewey on my other dog and people ask me a lot for resources and we did a whole episode in this. Like someone just messaged me and she said, my friend just lost her dog. Do you have any advice? And I was like, yeah, we did a whole episode

in this. She just was like binging and she hadn't gotten there yet. So that was in February of this year. And it was called like pet loss and grieving. You'll say the title is very explanatory. But that is like, I've just gotten a few of those lately and I direct people that episode. I got a message from a girl I knew in Atlanta, like a casual friend. I haven't seen her really spoken to her in depth in years. And she's struggling with not wanting children and her boyfriend, she's divorced, he's divorced, but he wants children. He doesn't have children and she does not want children. Like she's like, you know, like me, like us, like doesn't want children. And she's like, I feel like we might have to break up.

Like he keeps telling me like, you'll change your mind. I'm like, whoa. I just like, yeah. And so I was like, do you mind giving me some more information? I'm just like out of curiosity. Like, I'd love to know what's going on here because I've always feared that. And I was like, you know, what we did a whole episode on not wanting children, but only you can decide if this is going to be the end of the road for you. Also, that's the condescending thing to say. I don't like it from anybody,

especially your partner. Well, I mean, we said this in the episode, but it's just as condescending as somebody being excited about having kids and you saying to them, you'll change your mind. Yeah. You know, that's a crazy thing that you would never say,

but just to put it into perspective, that's how crazy it is to say to somebody that says, I don't want kids, you'll change your mind. Well, that's what they want to do. You'll change your mind. Have you looked at the climate lately? You should change your mind. Kidding. You can bring a child into this world if you want.

It is on fire. Not the child. The Earth. The Earth. The planet. Mother Earth. Okay. Do you... I just want to say something. Do you, speaking of, like, our podcast and recommending like listening to podcasts. I said the video yesterday, it just made me laugh. So I just wanted to tell them, you went on Kane's podcast this week, and I was listening to it. And it was so nice. And I was like, Ashley,

I group texted you and Kane and I was like, you were such a great guest. And you were like, Brina, thanks for saying I'm good at podcasting. Okay. And it may be laugh so hard because it is a really unique experience for me to be listening to you and not be a part of it. And I just... With your boyfriend. Yeah. Okay.

That's not the funniest part of that text. The funniest part. The funniest part. I almost put this on my Instagram story to promote his episode because I thought it was so funny. So I went on Kane's podcast with Greg Barrett. It's called Don't Take Bullshit from Fuckers. D, T, whatever. The Instagram's like abbreviated.

And I told Raina, like, you should listen to it, like mainly because we do talk about you a lot. She's like, say no more fam. So she went in there. And then she texted me and Kane and goes, I'm listening to this week's episode. Kane, you've had sex with other girls. Island. And he was talking about how he like, after he got divorced, he was all geared up to like fuck

all these girls. And he was like, I was going in there like, I'm going to fuck them. Then I'd be on a date with him and be like, oh, you're a person. I like you. We have a lot in common. He made me laugh so hard. And he was like, I've had sex a couple of people.

And I was like, so, Kane, you've had sex with other people. Like, it's so funny to me. Kane was married. So that's, you know, it's funny. But then I was like, shit,

I'm sorry I didn't tell you. But it was just such a funny conversation. You guys should go listen to the, well, Raina's been on it too. And that's a very iconic episode because that's how you met him. So you guys should go listen to that podcast, me and Raina's episodes. If you want to listen to more,

but just start with ours. But we talked about it, how like, he can't be a fuck boy because he's not wired like one. And that's what I was saying about Fuck Boy Island, F Boy Island, that like the stuff, when they show the like tapes of the fuckboys, like they could be playing it up for the camera and for, you know, the casting. But like decent men don't say shit like that.

They don't have it in them. They don't think like that. Their brains don't work like that. You know what I mean? Like we always say this. You are. You aren't. And to take it even a step further,

decent men don't even want to be fed fake lines like that. Right, right. Like, it's even worse to me to not even be that kind of person and be like, yeah, I'll say that. Yeah. Oh, even worse. And that's just weird. Like, you do anything to be famous on TV, which is a gross quality too. So. Yeah, I don't know what it stems from, whether it's insecurity or you're just not a nice person or whatever it is.

But, like, leaning into this idea of like, I like, I like manipulating people. I like having sex with people just for personal gain and treating people like not a human. Like, that's not a person I would ever try to change. Like, can they change? I don't care if they could change. No, I don't want it. and you need therapy. I mean, those people are, they're deeply insecure and self-loathing.

That's why they do that. You know what I mean? Like, whatever. This is what this is about today. But anyway, I'm glad you enjoyed listening to me and your boyfriend podcast together. It's a rare experience. I get to just listen to you. I know.

All right. What else? This thing happened, I just wanted to tell you really quickly. This thing happened in like pop culture this week. I feel like I'm finally having my moment. I feel like people like me are finally having our moment. Dach Shepherd and Chris. People like me.

Jack Shepherd and Kristen Bell. They said that they only bathe their kids when they start to stink. And then all of this, like, all these articles started coming out, like, J. J. Jelineal was like, I don't bathe. And then Camer Diaz has said the path. She doesn't bathe. All these people come out and said, I don't bathe. And I feel like people like me are, like, having our moment.

Oh, my God. I've been waiting. I've been waiting for it for so long. I'm sitting here going like, I know it's so gross, right? And Raina's like, but that. That's me. Ashley Coucher and Milakunas, we're like, we don't, we don't wash our kids. Like all these, like the most beautiful celebrities that Jake Jelineau was like, I don't do

it. I just, and don't get me wrong, guys. I shower every day because I work out. It is like torture. I would rather just be jiggly and unhealthy and not work out than shower every day. So the rock came out and said that he showers three times a day. I know he did. Yeah.

So the rock said that he explained it. He explained why. I mean, he works out for a living, you know what I mean? So he said he showers three times a day. And you see his meme floating around this week that this guy, I guess, retweeted it or something and said, this is almost weirder than the not showering or whatever. And the rock, like, responded. And this guy was like, I got to start shutting the fuck up.

Like, can you imagine you kind of like neg the rock and he claps back? You're like, oh, no. Oh, no. I would just get so hot even. Like the Rock was nice. I think he's like such a sweet guy. I've heard nothing but really wonderful. I've heard nothing but wonderful things about him from people.

I randomly met this guy in Chicago who owns a bagel place in Chicago. He invited me to come in. And then he randomly was like my daughter is the Rock's assistant. And he was like, I can't say and I have nice things about him. He's wonderful. Never heard a bad thing. Never. Like he wanted to work out at this gym.

I used to go to an Atlanta called the forum. I miss it every day. It's like one of the main things I miss about Atlanta. And never had a better butt than when I was doing fast Twitch at the forum in Atlanta. If you guys, if it's still around, go to that class, but lower body only. Anyway, but he, I remember them even saying, like, he wanted to come work out there, but he didn't want to shut down the gym. Like, he can shut down the gym. Like, it's a huge gym. Like, he can be like, sorry, what do you guys make in two hours? Let me pay, you know, like, I feel like even I've heard Taylor Swift

shut down the gym. Like, you know, but I think he was, everybody kept saying how amazing it was. And I think, I don't think he could shut it down. I think people were in there. And they were like, he was taking photos. Like, I just love it. And I've heard people say, this isn't true. And I. And I'm. And I've heard people say, this isn't true all the time, but I've heard, I forget who said this. It was like a celebrity makeup artist or stylist or somebody that's like the bigger, the celebrity, almost the nicest, the nicer they are. Like, the meanest people are like D-list, like reality show. Like people people that want to act like assholes because they want to act like they're too good or something. Like, you know what I mean? Like they, you always hear like the nicest people are like the

huge, huge names. You know what I mean? I just, they have no reason to flex. The nicest person I ever I was working at quality meets. I was a manager there in New York's expensive steakhouse. Hallie Berry came in and couldn't have been sweeter. She was like, if you guys want to have a table, it's no big deal. I don't want to bother you guys. I was like, no worries, Hallie Barry, we'll get you a table. She couldn't have been sweeter. Yeah, yeah, we gotcha. The Rock, I don't know if you guys know this. He is the most famous person on Instagram. He's more famous than the Kardashians. He has the most amount of Instagram followers more than Justin Bieber, Selena Gomez, Taylor Swift, the most famous. So that guy could shut down anything he wants any day of the week.

he's just, God, I love him so much. He's a girl dad? Big people. Okay, so yeah. I mean, listen, I remember being a kid and being like the worst thing that could happen is that I have to get a shower. You know what I mean? Like, I forgot that's what you're talking.

Hey, sorry, I got to go back to it because I just cannot speak on being a parent. And like I feel like you get to a point where you're like, I don't fucking care. Like they hate it. We hate it. They're not getting bathed until they start to smell. I don't know. I don't, you know, I also am like a person with dry skin. Like, I do shower almost every day, but you don't have to.

It's better for your skin to, like, let some of those natural oils seep out. I don't know. I mean, listen, your vagina, self-cleaning, you know, like, I mean, your butt. You got to get a tissue, but sorry, I keep cutting you on. Like, I can't be more than, nothing. Nothing was better for me than COVID, because I never showered. It was amazing. Listen, COVID sucked.

It was bad. But I lived alone, so, like, I didn't have to bathe and it was great. I wash my hair varying frequently. I actually asked our friend, Izzy, who was a flywheel instructor, now she's an eye fit instructor. But she's dry hair too. And I was like, do you wash your hair every day? And she was like, I wash my hair like maybe twice a week.

Because she's an instructor every day. So I just was curious. People work out a lot do. And she was like, I put dry shampoo in it, clip it up. It's other people's problem. I don't care. Okay, fine. You want to go there?

I have a tip. I don't, if I don't work out, like, let's say, like, yeah, during COVID or or like being at home or for whatever, like, I can go a full-blown. week and it won't look that bad like seven days later if I don't wash it. The sweat is like what gets in it. But yeah, I mean, even if I am working out, I still only wash my hair two, three times a week. One of the tricks is, I forget, I learned this so many years ago on a blog. When you, it's going to sound gross, you guys, but hear me out, when you sweat, I did this today. When you sweat and you get sweat in your hair and you're not a person that's going to wash it right then, you should blow dry

the sweat dry before you do anything. So, because leaving it wet and sweaty and getting all crinkly. So when I come in from like the Peloton or from hot yoga and my hair is sweaty, I actually blow dry it with my blow dryer till it's dry, like blow dry the sweat. And then like I get in the shower and I pull it up in a scrunchy and like don't wash it. I don't think it's so weird. That's kind of that's what like people that aren't washing their hair all the time and they sweat. That is like the supposedly the trick. That's what works for me. And of course dry shampoo. It goes without saying. Your hair looks great and healthy and I've never smelled like your hair or like how to smell on you. So I mean it works. I love that you brought that up. Oh.

Okay, we're going to do one more thing. We're just going to chat about it. Something to happen to me. And then we'll get into it with our guest today, who is Jay Jordan. We're so excited to have him. But this was something that happened recently to me. Someone slid in my DMs and people slide in my DMs a lot. Guys, I mean, you know, guys that are hitting on me.

And most of them, I ignore because they're not good looking. But, you know, how can you get here? Every once in a while. And I'm flattered by all of it. Seriously. Like, if it's not something rude or mean, but like, you know, if it's not somebody that I'm like think is attractive, I'm not going to bother

with it, but this guy was cute. Really cute. Yeah. He sounds like a Wes Anderson character. He's like an explorer. He's very cute. And I was like, whoa, this is rare. And so he basically, I guess, a fan told him, it was like, hey,

you have some things in common with this girl. He's like a liberal guy. He's faxed, whatever. He told me that. Tall, cute, whatever. But he slid in in his message, I don't want to like put this person on blast. I might keep talking to them. Who knows? But his message was kind of like, I don't, he opened with like, I don't know what girls got eat is. Or no, he said, I don't know what GGE stands for. But like my friend's a fan and like kind of the overall tone, he said some

funny things. I was like, okay, but was like, I don't know who you are. Right. He said it twice. Yeah. And I'm like, all right. And I, you know, didn't love it, but was kind of like, what, he's cute, you know. And Rayne and I were kind of discussing it. Like, do you like we didn't really love this like indifference neg sort of you know like hey i took the time to follow you and message you but i don't know who you are and i want to tell you that like okay i don't know what the show in your bio means and i want to tell you that too yeah and because that's actually the exact opposite of what i would like i would want if someone was and vice versa you know if i'm going to sign to someone's dms or they're going to sign to mine i would like like hey love

what you do kind of thing like why else are you here it's so much better to compliment someone on what they're doing they're like who you're hot you know 100 percent So we sent it to Jared. Jared Freed. I actually started the text with, Hey Lord. I said, hello Lord.

Hello, Lord and Savior Jared Fried. And he hated it. Uh-huh. Right away, he just was like, I don't like this. Well, and he is coming from place

if he gets that too. You know what I mean? Because I think sometimes girls want to DM and DMM and they want to play cool. Like, I'm not a fan. I don't even know who you are,

which is not what to do, everybody. We're just here to tell you and like make this a teachable moment. So, was like, no, I don't like it. I hate it. And I was like, what he's on? And Jared was like, all, all kind of work collectively. We're like, well, if I'm going to continue talking to him, he needs to know that I didn't like that. And so I wrote back, I said something like, oh, all these

things he had said. I was like, oh, those are all great qualities, but you lost me with the indifference neg, L.O.L. And he, like, came back with like an apology. He was like, I'm sorry. That was an awful way to hit you up. A super nice one. And I complimented you. Yeah. He was like, yeah. You're right. That was funny. fucking lame of me and I'm sorry and I think you're gorgeous and funny and would love to meet you basically. You know what I mean? And I was like, okay, wow, which that's what should happen. You know, this happened in before to me. Someone kind of negged me on a dating app and I, I mean, nagging, I hate it. I can deal with like, I love being roasted and joked with. Like, that's like

something I love so much, but like a neg from a stranger feels different. And so I'm always down to like put it on blast. And I've had a. couple instances, this included where the guy walks it back. And I'm like, then we can go from there. You know what I mean? And I think if someone's like, oh, you're so sensitive. I was just joking. Never talk to that person again. 100%. We've talked to you guys a lot about like what's say on dating apps and like whether a person is a notable figure or not. Like starting with any negativity is just always wrong, whether it's a woman messaging a man, a man messaging a man messaging a woman or same sex, whatever it is. Whoever you are starting off with like, I don't know anything about what you do,

but like you're hot or like I don't want to be nagged. I don't enjoy it. I think it starts off the conversation is like, you're trying to be funny, but you're like doing it through insulting me or showing that you're like too busy to care about what I have to do. And I don't know you. So all I have in these couple sentences and I'm just going to go,

fuck you. I don't like this. Yeah. And I think that this guy was not coming from a, like I think he's probably just like his tone was probably like, my friend said you're, I should talk to you. I'm like this rugged dude.

Like I'm not listening to this. Like I. It harms. Yes. And that's why I kind of hit him back with like an LOL. Like I responded in a lightweight but got my point across too. Like I'm not going to hit someone and be like, real cool way to hit me up, loser. You know what I mean?

Like it was just and so whatever. Like we've, we might chat. I don't know. He doesn't live here. I just, I loved this example and you said such a great thing. You were like, that guy will never do that again. Yeah. We're all learning.

We all, we all have the opportunities to teach somebody how to treat us and where our boundaries lay and like right out of the gate. You were just like, my boundaries, you know, don't neg me like right out of the gate. and act like you're indifferent to what I do, because I'm proud of what I do. And yes, I want to share that with somebody. It's exciting to me, you know? And I just think that, like, we are always teaching people how to treat us,

whether it's the first interaction or the hundredth. But, like, if all you had said was like, ha-ha, so how are you? Then he would be like, okay, great, this is the dynamic. And I don't love that. I don't want to be treated like that. Right. And, like, even going back to speaking to the ladies, who is, you know, such a majority of our audience,

like, you're going to slide into someone's DMs like, Jared, don't do that. You know, don't try to play to play. it too cool, like, I have no idea who you are. Yeah, you do. You do. You're just like trying. You know, it's like, first of all, this is a lie. Like, stop acting like you're too cool and to compliment someone's work. I think actually, like, what, the complete opposite of that would have been like, and not that he has to, but like if you're going to message Jared or you or somebody would have been like, hey, a friend introduced me to you. I had no idea who you were. I listened to a few minutes of an episode. I thought you were like so funny and I wanted to send you a message. Like,

Why not compliment somebody and show that you actually made an effort? Yeah. 100%. That doesn't make you a loser. Yeah. And listen, like this is not, this, I love the guy's response. Like, he, you know, and he's fucking hot. So listen.

We'll see. So whoever sent him my way. We might run into a show. We're not going to take which one. Yeah. Maybe it's Charleston. Now I'm just trying to sell some Charleston tickets. We're just trying to sell those tickets.

The Charleston security guard that I was fucking, he moved the keys. I can't even like, we can't get him there. We'll find another security guard to hit on during the show. We probably shouldn't just like fly your ex in. You got a man. You floated it to me though. Yeah. What would happen?

You know, I don't like him. So we would just have a full roast on stage. Let's do it. I got plenty of miles. You have more miles. I have so many fucking miles. But I love this advice. We always say on dating apps.

Just start with. with something positive. If you're going to slide into somebody's DMs, always start with something positive. You're not being like, I'm a huge fan. And I took a few minutes to listen to something that you do and I was impressed by it or I thought it was funny. And if somebody thinks you're attractive, they'll take five minutes. They'll look at your profile. They'll decide if you're attractive and they'll message you back accordingly. Yeah. I mean, any, this is, I'm not referencing this guy, which I want to be clear. We're taking him out of the mix. But the whole Neg thing, the pickup artist stuff is fucking disgusting. We should do a whole episode just on how disgusting.

and toxic it is. Like the whole thing of that. Like, neg a woman, like, give her a little pullback. Like the whole thing. I mean, if you read that book, I haven't read it, but I'm familiar with a lot of the principles of it. It's like just so gross. And there's guys still out there operating like that. Yeah. And I think when I was like younger, no offense to people that are younger, but like before I like was able to name the behavior, it probably would have worked on me a little bit better. And it's just I don't, I just want you to think that I'm cool and successful and smart and fun. And that's all I'm interested in. If you don't think that, we don't have to date each other. Ew. Yeah. I'm not sad. Yeah. Anyway, I have a boyfriend now. So,

um, Ray and I are both in LDRs. Um, wow, Dewey is going to be so awkward this year now now that we weren't doing. Oh, we're doing right now. We didn't even say that. Yeah. I mean, we're not right now as we record, but as this episode comes out, we're in Dewey Beach all week, sort of half the week. Anyway, we're starting our vacation on Sunday. It's big, I don't have a job energy. When you said that, you were like, can we live on Sunday? I was like, yeah. We're like, that's such a flex. Start. vacation on Sunday. We're like Sunday scary is where?

We don't know her. No, I get those. All right, guys, we are very excited to welcome our guest today. He is a New York City comedian, which you know is always our favorite. You have seen him on the Tonight Show, HBO Comedy Central, ever heard of it. Please welcome to the show, Jay Jordan. Yay, thank you for having me. Yay, thank you for being here.

You are in your full athletic wear. Yes. windbreaker pants that are very loud. I can't sneak up on anyone. And a white mesh champion tank top. I love it. I look like I'm bench warming for like a middle school basketball team. No, you look good.

I like your style. I was looking at your shoes. And we're talking about how fresh they look and how Gen Z dresses. We had a very old millennial conversation before this. You just have to like accept what you can do from them and like give up the things that you'll never be able to do. Like I, one time I was at a Sunday brunch and I put on tiny sunglasses and I just looked squinty. That was it. Yeah.

It wasn't cute. That's not one of the things I could pull off. So I was like, okay, let me see if I can play with silhouettes. Well, and I like, I can appreciate some of it because they just have kind of given up and like trying. No, like trying to look cute or match. No, or like, you have to not let me finish. Like looking so skinny. You don't know what I mean?

Like it used to be all about this like skinny gene and this silhouette and this like high boot. Like they're like, we're going to wear a dress with an air max. You know what I mean? Like they're like, we don't care. We're going to wear our dad's jeans and a shirt from the thrift store and a big sneaker. Like I'm not even saying, I'm not even throwing shade. I'm like that we're more free to not look. Which sucks though?

Because like the shadies thing, all of the women before us could see. to someone, it's, well, you look comfortable. They look comfortable. They have a pair of the baggiest black Jenko jeans. It looks like you look comfortable and like you spent a dollar on your outfit. But like that, because we grew up with people using that as like a barb and an insult, they've like completely taken it and go, no, I do look comfortable. That's the point.

In myself. And you're like, oh, my God, you're right. I'm so happy that you have the opportunity to play with these things. And I'm not mad at all. I'm very happy for you. And you get to kiss boys early? Great. Yeah,

I'm very happy for y'all. It's so true saying that the comfort used to be an insult. Because, like, how many years did I spend going out being so physically uncomfortable? Every moment, just so what, look hot to some, like, asshole named Chad?

But, like, what, the craziest thing to me is, like, a sexy, tight, fucking bandage dress with a sneaker. It looks like you came home from the club and then had to go walk your dog.

But that's how they, like, like you weren't supposed to be doing that. That's what they do. I'm, I am respecting it. I'm, I'm,

I'm responsible Mary Beth Brown and she hosted a show in a lime green, like skin tight dress with like a sneaker. That was kind of one of the first times like, this was years ago that I saw it down.

I was like, we can do this? I remember the day. It was the day we interviewed Hannah Burner. It was in June of 2019. I still remember. The, the look struck me

because it was a rooshed up neon green. Rosed neon green. Dress with like a pair of like big chunky sneakers. Yeah, I remember when the chunky sneakers hit New York in waves. Do you remember when, like, people were just, like, stomping down First Avenue? You were like, girl, where are you headed? Yeah.

Like, I remember also being, like, a bit self-conscious because so many guys were like, when the girls get tall? What's happening? What's happening? These girls are getting pretty tall. I don't like this. And their sneakers, yeah. Yeah. But I, like, my whole childhood was being self-conscious about my giant feet.

So, like, I had to wear a, like, little sneaker. Like, I feel like I can't go back. And I was just... No converse ever for you, right? Well, just the big, clunky dad sneaker. Like, they would make my feet look so much bigger. Yeah, no converse. I had to do that really high top, real tight to the foot, Reebok, whack to minimize.

Like, I was having meltdowns and shoe stores. My dad would come home and, like, looking like he had just been beat up on the street. And he was like, I can't take her shoe shoe shopping for a lot. He went to war at famous underwear with you. with a size 10 foot. That is crazy. It was like an escalation though because it like forces, it was like forces like the uptowns and then they started get dirty.

And then they started to get chunky. And then the Felaus because of the Balenciaga influence. And then now it's like anything. And now sometimes you'll be like, what is that? They'll be like, I don't know. You don't find your shoes on the street like all the cool kids. They'll be like, no. I did not find my shoes on the street.

Or they'll be like, oh, so your shoes match. Where are you 30? And you're like, I am. You're like, I need the same arch. I can't be out here. I've spent decades having it engraining me that I have to match and be tailored and fitted and spend a bunch of money on clothing. And now every one of those rules is out the door. They're like, look like dog shit.

It's sexy. And thank y'all, though. Thank y'all. This is not us complaining. This is being like, well, damn. I don't have to match anymore. I love it. I wear sweatshorts and, like, giant chunky sneakers every day.

But everyone who's older than us will get mad at us. us, but they won't get mad at them. Like one time I, I, like, one time I was like, oh, let me put on like something a bit oversized. And someone was like, Jay, are you, is that like a sleep shirt? And I was like, don't say that. You know, y'all know about sleep shirts. Like, you're like, I thought this was cool. I was playing with frame. I was trying to, you know, I thought this was like a hot couture. Okay, thanks. Right. How do y'all feel about boy sneaker culture, like, becoming like crazy? Like, it's always been like, like, crazy like in urban settings.

But now like, you know, like, there's some casual dudes. Like, you don't care about sneakers. And like, no, I don't know about sneakers. And you're like, no, you don't. Why are you pretending? Well, I don't know. Like, I'm not so in tune, but I feel like I know if something looks like it's not good. Yeah.

You know, like, I feel like I can appreciate a guy that takes care in his, like, faux wear. I don't care at all. I got to tell you, my extract me to the Brooklyn Museum for a sneaker exhibit. I was like, this is the worst day my life. Yeah, but would you date a guy like in a flip-flop? No. I mean, I just, if you said to me like somebody that cares not about fashion at all or a lot about fashion, I'll pick a lot about fashion, I guess, or like Kane who just lets me tell him what to put on his body. And it goes both ways. Like I ask him, how do I look? What should I wear? But yeah, I don't want a flip-flop or a cargo short.

There are some fellas out here flipping and flop. So, okay, and this is going to be a great transition, Jay, because if you never really lived in the South or went to school in the South or whatever, I feel like if you grew up up here, probably. probably New York City, Philly, whatever. You were probably like, you didn't understand a flip-flop on a man, like wearing them out, not at the beach of the pool, like to go out. But for us, men would wear men. Boys would put on dress khakis. It was a game day. Tell the truth.

They're wearing a dress shirt and a rainbow sandal. A rainbow sand. A rainbow sandal was the highest standard of sandal too. There were lower tier sandals. And not sandals. that are strap. Not Tivas. We're talking about like flip flops.

Thong. Rainbow. Not the like shower shoes that just go over the foot. No. A slide. Okay. I don't know about this at all because I, okay,

so you are from Mississippi and you went to school in Alabama just to tell everybody about you. Okay, so tell me about the rainbow flop. So, okay. So whenever you go to like a big football school in the South, like I went to Ole Miss and Alabama and Ashley went to Clemson, so you know that there are like certain,

certain uniforms that even whatever you were wearing in high school, your first month there, you're like, oh, I got to change. Yes, I've ever heard of a rainbow sandals. I had to change myself. Like, Ralph Lauren, Oxford's, like short chinos or khakis, shorts. Bell with an animal on it. With usually a whale or a crocodile. And if you think that's an alligator on Lacost shirt, people will make fun of you.

It's a crocodile. Shout out to Renee, LaCost. And then here's what happens. People like go, oh, can go. And this, once again, this is like dated. This is like, oh, if we're talking like 07 to 012. So you can have like top siders when it's cold, like sparries. Like a boat shoe.

People make fun of boat shoes, but like people use to rock them. And then flip flops. Flip flops. Flip like dirty flip flops. And they were like the whole thing of a rainbow stance. So they're leather. They're decent leather. But like they were the top tier.

and they would hurt and you'd have to kind of break them in. And like, you wouldn't be, want to be caught dead in, like, a reef. You had to have a rainbow. Reefs were for the pool. Guys, I'm Googling this. I don't know what you're talking about. The time and place for everything. Decorum is very important in southern institutions.

But I was so, became so accustomed to, like, men in flip flops that I didn't really think it was a big deal. Like, even guys, I dated in Atlanta, like, flip flops with jeans. Yeah. And now I live here and I'm just like, a flip flops. with a gene. With a gene. Wait, y'all, for people,

okay, rainbow is a style. To go to a restaurant. It's not like a red, orange, yellow, green, blue. It's a brand. No, it's a brand. I thought it was a color scheme. I'm thinking about, like, men wearing rainbow. Rainbow brand.

I had no idea what you're talking about. But they were so tough that you're right. You had to wear them down. Like you had to have like indentations of your feet in them. You molded them. And if you got kind of like a pious. hair that was dyed a little too hard. Your foot would turn brown on the bottom.

Like, I'm like, what, like, I would wake up and I'd be like, what happened to my feet last night? Are you looking at them? Yeah. They're still around. They're like, you see them now and you go, oh, what, how do you pair that with anything? And they didn't. Oh, look at that bud.

Why would they choose that guy to model it? What is that toe? Those are like my toes. Well, because that's what the deuce feet look like. These weren't, these men, these 18 to 24 year olds in the South, they're not getting pedicures all the time. That's true. Well, I think it's like a we're dating podcast. We're talking about dating relationships.

This segment's going to slap. This whole footwear this is not, yeah. Well, we want to talk to you about what you talk about in your comedy. We've heard about how about there shows about being sexually fluid, being a gay man in the South, being a bisexual man in the South. We

haven't really done like a deep dive on being sexually fluid. So we would just like love your opinions and thoughts and you are currently in a relationship. for something right now, right? Yes. And the way that works is that whatever you did before was going on, like in your relationship, whatever you did before you were in your relationship, that stuff still exist.

And a lot of people who are queer or were queer have had experiences, sometimes they go, oh, that stuff didn't exist. Or some people will say, oh, that doesn't exist for you. Because for men, a lot of times, and people who are like seen as masculine, Whenever you go to start to do queer stuff, people go, oh, you're gay, it's done, it's one way door, shut, locked, closed behind you. And then if you ever like, oh, no, I like made out with a girl, oh, I think that girl's like, she's really hot. She's very pretty. People will be like, what is this?

Betrayal of trust. But you're like, but I felt that way. Yeah, I felt that way. I didn't have to power through hooking up with that girl. Like, what do you? You're telling. Like, I liked it. Yeah, I didn't get in trouble in high school for being out late with girls just so I could be like, see, Mom, I'm an amazing actor.

No, it was like. Right. And it wasn't even like one of those things where it's like it's compulsory heterosexual behavior, which sometimes can happen for people who are queer and know they will never want to hook up with a person of the opposite sex. But in high school, they're like, oh, let me, I have friends that are a butch, hardcore lesbians. And they'll be like, you want to see my prom photo? I'll be like, I'm going to laugh. But like those people who are like subjected to those kind of rules, it's a little bit different for me because I was always like, oh, this is interesting and also this is interesting. I have like a wide range of interest, both like academically, socially and sexually.

Well, it's like we always see this on the show that like people are dynamic. They can have different interests. People are dynamic and they have different sexual interests if they feel like it. None of us are one way all the time, 100% of the way. And I very much believe sexuality is a large spectrum. You can be very close to heterosexual or. close to homosexual or close to the middle, but like nobody is one thing all the time always. And if they so hardcore try to convince you that they are, they're probably a little gay.

Or even, or worse, on the other end, there is like a deep level of like male homosexuality that starts to like approach but never reach misogyny when they're like, women are terrible. Okay, women shouldn't even be in here. All right, women should be quiet. Wait a minute. Where do we get? Come out. Hold on.

Women should be a size zero and shut up. You're like, whoa. How do we get here? You sound like your dad who kicked you out. That's like, what's going on? So can we travel through high school college and coming out? 100%. So in middle school, I remember, I remember being like, oh, like, okay, that gay is bad.

That's kind of when you hear it. In elementary school, like things are like kind of childlike. middle school because of puberty, you kind of start to go gay equals bad. Right? Like that happened, I think in a lot of people's middle school. I grew up in the north in a Jewish family,

so a little bit less of that. But I think that you're just, you understand sexuality a little more. But even like with peer groups, like if you're around anyone your age, it's like gay, oh, that's bad. That's foreign. That's crazy and weird.

For people in our 30s, absolutely, especially in the South. Yeah. A cardinal sin. Yeah. And not only is a cardinal sin, you're like, how could you even, what? And you start to hear people say like, that's gay.

Oh, yeah. It's like negatively, constantly around the age. So much so that Hillary Dove had to tell us not to on NBC infomercials. And so then, like, I had like crushes in middle school, but they were never crushes on boys because I didn't even know how to articulate that. I would have crushes on girls. And then at one point, I remember seeing a guy and I was like, oh, they got so cool. And for, I want to say the next 10 years, like a guy being cool.

A guy being like really like charming. That was my coded way of being like, oh, that guy's like attractive. And even like an objectively attractive guy, you can be like, oh, that guy's so cool. I want to be like that guy. I want a new guy would come. I remember one time like in high school, a new guy came to our school. And I was like, man, this new guy, y'all, he's like pretty cool. And everyone's like, so?

And I was like, we should like find out what he does? Like, what's up with him? What does the parents do? We don't know anything about him. And they're like, we don't care. And I was like, well, that's not very hospitable. We're supposed to let this new. kid know that we could be nice at this school. And then I started having like really close

relationships with girls in non-romantic ways. Like I had like one of my good friends in high school, Michelle, like we like bonded just because we were both like doing theater and we were both like kind of like silly. And she could always make me laugh. I could always make her laugh. But she would even like defend me. Because that in high school, that's when like things, people would be like, oh, well Jay's not trying to hook up with those girls all the time. Jay is gay. But I have like girlfriend. friends in high school, but anytime you weren't like a ravenous, kind of like almost dangerous sexual being in some high schools, they're like, that's kind of gay. You'd be like, because I didn't

touch this person without their permission. That is so interesting that like people start to categorize you if you can be the kind of man that could just have female friends that you're not trying to have sex with. Oh yeah. See that as being like weak or gay. That's really interesting. Well, it happened because so many people were trying to overcompensate for the lack of sex that we were all having. Every guy was like, man, you know, I'm fucking. And I was like, well, you need to be studying. Because we have a world history quiz. And I don't know the difference between Norway, Sweden, and Finland.

So let's figure it out. And like, well, you're gay. Yeah. And it's like, well, I know Denmark's over here. And he's like, back to the pussy. And you're like, I just, I really am worried about these Scandinavian countries, my man. Like, we might get in trouble. And so, like, that's the kind of stuff.

I was experiencing. Even in, like, in high school, we, like, read the picture of Dorian. in gray. And like, I remember our instructor, our teacher, Ms. Williams, she, like, had to talk about Oscar Wild and, like, buggery charges and what it meant to be, like, gay in the Victorian period. And everyone was like, oh, we're talking about a gay author. And, like, looking back on it, I'm like, oh, yeah, the one gay author ever. Like, it was, like, so weird that back then. So, like, I never had any expressed homosexual desire in high school. And then I worked at Abercrombie be my last two years of high school. Of course you did.

And I had my first crush on a boy named Shane who was like super gay. He was out. He was gay. And I was like, what is this? And like, we never hooked up. But he was one of those guys that was like, that guy's gay. And like, kind of handsome. Like, what's

going on here? I didn't, I don't know they could do that. Just, he's in the mall. Like, I could just go out public. Yeah, I was like, he's around kids and stuff. Wait, is this in Mississippi? Yeah, this is in Mississippi. I'm like, you're just like, oh, wow, okay.

I'm going to go eat some pizza with him. What's up, Shane? He's just like, he's just like talking back to me. He's just out in the world. And you'd be like, and you'd be like, can I, can I ask you something? You be kissing boys? He said yes. Whoa.

That's what's up. And then I had a general manager who would come in every now and then, who was a mean gay. Shane was like hot. and kind of like Shane was hot, blonde, young, nice, which I was like, you just described my type. I was like gay people. I was like gay people can be nice, Shane. I don't think he's doing this right.

And then I met Roy and I was like, he's doing it. He was a mean ex big gay, lost weight, would come in and be like, this is wrong. And at average crime, you'd be like, because you could get in trouble. Right. And so that was my last two years of high school. And so I kind of like had like a crush on him. It was my first. I remember being like, oh, this is a crush.

Okay. But I had, like, best friends in high school. I was like, looking back on, I'm like, do I have a crush on them? Why do all my exes look at my two best friends from high school? Like, that's something crazy I look back on. Do you feel like, even at that age you were aware that you were, like, sexually attracted to Matt? I was aware that, like, sexual taboos were, like, kind of hot.

You know, that age where if you see anyone's butt in any movie, you're like, ooh, a butt. Yeah. A boob? Oh, my God. Someone's butt. Were you hooking up with girls? Hoking up with girls.

Hoking up with girls and cars. Liking it. I had this, there was this one girl. So my first prom date, she was a cheerleader. Then I was such a little piece of shit. Because like there was, she was in the dance department. I was in theater department. And so we went to prom together.

In that following year, I like start secretly hooking up in between classes with one of her fellow cheerleaders. But only in like my car or her car whenever we would go places in between classes. And I was like, oh, man. man, it was just so bad we can't. And then she had a boyfriend at a different school. And then, like, that was also the year with, like, all the boys, this happened in y'all's high school. All the boys were like, we're going to go hit on girls. And everyone's like, okay.

And we're like at a different high school. And everyone's like, no, you're breaking the rule. And, like, all the girls at our school were like, they're not prettier than us. And I was like, oh, my God. But they don't know that we're a piece of shit. So maybe y'all need to start to hit on guys at other high schools because we're sick of y'all. We've seen y'all since middle school. I mean, I dated, this guy dated, I say that loosely,

but was like seeing hooking up with this dude from a different high school when he was so hot. I felt like the coolest girl. I was seen. And then I just started to be like, oh, I don't date guys from this high school anymore. You probably have your, the amount of social currency you can get when someone's like, oh, will you? I saw you kissing someone.

Yeah. I'm like, yeah, I'm dating Trent from Dover High. Like I was just like, he was. He was like, what? Yes, he doesn't go here. But he, I thought it. He worked at the mall too. He worked at Strawberry.

That's a deep cut. And I was like, I'm so amazing. No, that's how it was also in Pittsburgh when you, if you dated a boy from Central Catholic, they were like a little bit bad. They were good at football. And if you were like fucking a guy, he doesn't go here. He goes to another school. Like, that was pretty cool.

And then it also made the guys at your school want you more because they'd be like, I mean, he ain't here. He ain't here. But like, we were having full on adulterous affairs in high school because I grew up during the era of Laguna Beach. So anything that happened in high school was. supposed to be like the map for the rest of your life. Like, we're the generation of the first promposal.

Like, we made shit important early. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We were like, oh, this means something. Uh-huh. Yeah. I lost my Virginia in high school, but I didn't have a lot of sex. I, like, had sex with two people in high school. Both of them were girls.

And then I was like, I went to college. And I went to college and I started doing theater. And it was the first time I, like, even flirted with guys. Like, I remember being like, oh, because, like, Facebook. Messenger, you could Facebook message people. And that's when I started because I was in theater. It's like private, yeah. Private.

I was around other queer people. And I was like, oh, shit. Oh, shit. Can I do this? Can I do this? And I flirted with like a guy once and we like kissed in like costuming class. And I like, remember kissing him in like the wardrobe like kind of like department that we were in. And I was like, this is what am I doing?

what is going on? It's the same guy hooked up with him once and it was at his apartment and I was like don't close the door because people are going to think we're in here doing gay shit

and he would like had it remind me he was like but we kind of are doing gay shit So what kind of stuff would not Is that the first person you hooked up with?

That was the first person I hooked up with but he didn't become my boyfriend I had like one serious boyfriend that was like a super secret serious boyfriend so I came out after that relationship, I was going to, like, a really tough time.

We broke up, and my mom was like, why are you so sad? And I was like, oh, this is why. And she was like, just the first time she'd ever heard me talk about, like, a relationship in college, like, that was, like, serious enough for this. And she, like, asked about the person. And at this point, you kind of have been using non-gendered terms for so long. You kind of have to be like, well, this guy, and then it's like, boom. And so she asked me, like, what was like, not really the race.

show, but she was like, oh, okay. So like, and I was like, oh, I've, like, dated girls, too. And I like guys and girls. And that was kind of the end of it. And I have a joke about it in my set where, like, then one time we went out to the perfume shop for her. And there was a guy at the perfume counter who was, like, hitting on me. It was the first time my mom saw, like, gay stuff going on around her with me.

And so, like, she was super chill. The only, the only person who I think even when I had a little bit of a problem, My brother who's younger than me had to be like, what's going on? And now he loves. He's fine. But like, I never had like a, oh, I'm going to hell moment. I just had like a very like, well, I don't know what's going to happen. Because I'm already doing theater.

And you know what I mean? Like I'm around queer people. I had come to terms with the idea of like not to shun and like be a terrible person to folks early. So did you, when you came out, did you know what the rest of your life would look like? And what does it look like? I mean, you're in this long relationship now, but you've said you've dated girls. Is your relationship kind of open? Like, I'd love to hear about kind of where you're at now.

So I didn't know I was going to be dating my current partner for as long as I was, because I was going off to grad school. I did not want a long, like kind of big relationship. I didn't want to do long distance. But then I was like, holy shit. Like, we've been together. We might as well stay together. I really like this person.

It's a three-hour drive. We can make. that work. And I was like, holy shit. And so that happened in 2012 as like when I left. Because we met in 20, we like started dating in 2011. So 10 years this November. And it was like crazy to me. I was like, I didn't see any of this. I didn't see any. I was like focused on trying to be a good actor. I was focused on trying to like figure I was going to do. And so then whenever that like offered me that kind of stability, I was like, oh, okay. But throughout the entire journey, Like it was never one of those things where I was like, oh, I'm by until I'm not.

It was always like, well, but Jay's, I mean, it is pretty by. Like to the point where like, begrudgingly, people have to be like, I mean, he's, yeah, he's a horn dog. So I knew I'd, like, want to have a relationship, but I didn't know if it was going to be with a guy or with a girl. And, like, it just happened to be with a guy who's, like, feminine and, like, sometimes plays with gender choices. But, like, it was one of those things that, like, really blew me away because I was like, wow. And so when we moved here, we were open for a little bit. We were open for a little bit just because as people who had been together for so long, and as people who loved each other and lived together and cultivated life together,

there was never a point where I was going to be like, if you kiss someone, I'm breaking up with you, that's it. Like, I'm like, I don't, I've seen you kiss people. So currently we're not open, but that is primarily because we do have like a third partner. we have like a thruple. What? Yes. I didn't want to, I didn't want to, I didn't want to.

This should have been the whole thing. I didn't want to spoil that. Because he's in L.A. right now. But that's like, our relationship is like a closed, equilateral triangle right now. Like, we're all each other's boyfriend because people will be like, are they boyfriend? Wait, what?

This sounds incredible. This is amazing. I need to wrap up one thoughts you had from before and then we need to get to this. This sounds like a blast. Well, if you, my rule is like, I know so many straight couples and there's couples in general that will be like have like a repeat guest for some reasons. And I'm like, y'all, that's starting to look like you enjoy all of that. So if y'all enjoy all that, why not.

And I was on tour. I was going to go on tour a lot in 2019, 2018. And I just like, I did not feel bad at all about him having someone that he truly deeply cared about and dating them while I'm not here. And I just like, I was like, oh, this is what works. this is what works. So that's what the current situation is. Okay. You have to ask a burning question.

I just wanted to wrap up. I just wanted to wrap up a thought from before because you said that like your boyfriend is he identifies as gay. Yeah. He identifies as gay. Does he have a problem? Like the answer could just be no. But like I know people always want everybody to define themselves.

Are you gay? Are you straight? Like does he have a problem with you not defining it or is it never come up ever? It doesn't matter. He is so chill about it in part because and I say this. as a person who doesn't have a degree in it. But if you accept that gender isn't completely fixed, then you inherently accept that sexuality isn't completely fixed.

And like people will toggle with both of those in whatever way they feel comfortable. So if someone was like, oh, I don't believe you're bi because you're only hooking up with a guy, then what happens when I as a bi person hook up with a trans woman? And you go, oh, okay, what happens when I hook up with a non-binary person? Like, what happens when I hook? Like, so the many you start to be like, these are the hardest set rules. There's so many external factors that break those. So he was never like, you have to pick.

You have to be gay with me. Because, like, our relationship is gay. We have a candelabra. It's a queer space. Like, there's never going to be a day where I'm like, I need you to be butch around my friends. Like, he grew up. He went to Ole Miss. his dad's a huge Auburn fan.

He's an Auburn fan in some games, which is tough, I guess. But that's probably his biggest struggle. I mean, like, you know what I mean? Like having a shitty SEC team. Like, he gets me and he gets it. He's also not one of those people who's grossed out by the idea. There's some people who put on like a performative act like, I could never even hook up with a girl.

I know so many gay guys that say, I could never even hook up with a girl. And I go, yes, yes, you can. You hook up with a bunch of girly dudes. So I promise you can. I promise you can't. The perfumes are the same. Like, you're fine.

You will be fine. Well, there was that, like, groundbreaking scene on Love is Blind where the guy that, like, Diamond is engaged to tells her that he's by. She's, like, you lied to me. And she's flipping out. And it's very emotional and upsetting. And I had never seen that on TV. And I'd never heard somebody say, like, I don't necessarily, like, owe you this

information. And it's hard. And not everybody understands these things. And there's like, I mean, there's a history of like secrecy and like that's so many women's biggest fear. Culturally we put that into a entire multiple generation of women's head that like your husband has a secret. And the first thing that women goes, oh, it's another woman. And someone goes worse. And they go, it's another man.

And they go, no, it's three other women. You go, oh, I would have. Okay. Like, people are better than a man. Like, it's like so scary to them. And part of it was like men. in the 40s and 50s who were gay, but also decided they wanted to have a nuclear family

because there was no way to be gay. Still happening. Yeah, there was no way for so many people to be gay. So they have family. So now you married a man who loves you and who loves the kids that y'all created, but also like has a part of himself that he had to hide. And culturally, we created a lot of that.

Like, we put that pendulum in motion. So that's like a big fear that a lot of women have. The other thing is that culturally being by is so much more acceptable for women or people who identify as femme. Right. Because everyone will go, oh, well, it's not real sex. And that's, that's misogynistic because people don't think lesbians have real sex. Okay. I actually, like, didn't know the reason why, you know, culturally.

They go, oh, that guys, that guy's in charge of that threesome. That's why, oh, yeah, that guy's getting it in with both of the. them in that threesome. And I'm like, you don't know who's pegging who and what during that threesome if it's like a male, female, female threesome. So have you dated hooked up with straight women? Yes. Yes. And then, because, okay, so this is like, I just feel like we have such a large audience of straight women. So you hear a guy as bisexual and you're like, what? Okay. Yeah. I don't, you might feel like not, I'm not saying me, I haven't dealt with that. So I can't speak on it, but I think maybe women are like, well, I don't really like that, but I don't know why.

Yeah. You know, let's even take the fear that they're just gay out of it. We don't subscribe to that here. So let's just, they're like, believe you. They're like, yeah, you're bisexual, but I don't like that you sleep with men. Like, do you run into this? I think that I was lucky enough to be hooking up with girls in theater department and in college that were chill about that aspect of things simply because of the circle of friends.

I never had a girl be like, you lie to me. I can't believe this. This is disgusting. What I have seen is girls go through the loss of like what they thought was like a potential future partner. So a betrayal of trust if a guy kind of like takes away what they were like. longing for, that's like a human reaction to things. If someone says, oh, we're going to build a life together and that person says, we can't. You go, but I, no, I wanted to with you. And that is

completely normal and completely fine. I think whenever a person starts to say, oh, I would never date a bisexual man, what I would love people to replace that with is I would never date someone who who I don't trust fully and who doesn't trust me fully. I don't want to date someone who's going to run around on me because I need a strict monogamous relationship right now. Because there are girls who hook up with dudes and you don't know anything. You don't know where his dick is being. A hundred percent.

And like that's like the same fear. You're just like, oh, I'm worried that he's out here. But like people just need to make it more about like what you want for your relationship at that moment in regards to monogamy. Right. But I mean, I think women probably are like, okay, but I never thought about this. I figured I would just always be as a straight man. I didn't think I would ever end up with a guy that like fucked other dudes. You know what I mean? And so I think they're having to like shift things that they'd always like their whole mindset on. I think the Sex and City episode where Carrie dated the bisexual guy and she couldn't do it. Yeah. But like because bi people are like the largest contingent of like the queer community, if every guy that has jerked off in the room with another guy, like, had, like, a little pin that had to, like, let everyone know he was by. Because that to some people is a gay enough experience. I mean, we were all watching the same thing.

But I was like, dog, you're like, dude, you're like hung. Like, if you, if every guy who had, like, some sort of same-sex experience or homosocial bond had to identify as by, then the dating pool would be so low. if every girl knew that figuring out even what you're into or figuring out what looks good as a man on other man is like rooted in like a bit of a desire to be them but also be seen as them the same way women see them but also you're like oh that guy's hot that's all rooted in like the very complex like pov of sexuality right right so i think it's like it's hard the more you expand the idea of bisexuality, the harder it is to say I would never. Right. Well, yeah. I mean, it's not fair. I mean, I'm the first person to say, like, I masturbate to women and I fuck men. So that's a complex thing, but like that's what I'm like and that's what I like. Yeah. So, like, it's not, I'm not, I don't identify as bisexual. I identify as a straight heterosexual woman. I date men. I masturbate to women. And if I ever met a woman and I was attracted to her,

I wouldn't stop myself from exploring it. Well, and I think the problem is like the, you're not by you're gay. Yes. Because the huge, I mean, think of, I know people like, there's still families I can think of in the South. Let's just say that the dad's definitely gay. The dad's not only definitely gay. The dad is like hilarious and miserable.

And he also has like two spinoff shows on USA. Like there's so many, even if he's not gay, his cultural, like, mores and his interaction with the world. Because you're not what you do in the bedroom, usually the most people. Because if that was the case, you know what everyone really does. You are how you interact with the world and what they perceive and what actions you put out there. So like, you're right.

There's so many dads looking back on it in the South. I'm like, oh, that dad, he's super gay. Just like, behaviorally. You're right. Like, if you look back on it, you go, oh, but what are people, what stops people is like the fear of rejection and the fear that you'll never find anyone, like bisexuals, like, in culturally, like, we're just supposed to be like kind of slutty experiences for people and never, like, settle down. You're always supposed to be like the third in someone's, you're always supposed to be like a unicorn for a couple, or you're supposed to be like this, like, terrible person who's a vector for disease, or you're supposed to be like a girl at sleepaway camp just one time.

You know what I mean? Like all these conditional rules to being bisexual. Well, and of course it would be a non-pleasant experience for women. and tons of women have dealt with this to be with a man who is a gay man who is just using you as a cover-up. So I think that all of the fears come from the stigma that bisexuality isn't real and that it's just fake on the way to gay. So a woman that's like you're bisexual, they think I don't want to be a beard. Like I don't want to, you know, I want. And it's not true.

So that's why I like love having you here today. And I love just being able to share experiences more. they're like, hey, this is real and you could be dating a guy that's by that thinks you're fucking sexy and hot and wants to fuck you and be with you. He's not just, because also why would you choose

bisexuality? Because you were like, couldn't come out. That's the other thing. You know what I mean? You literally gain nothing. I say this as a man. And to a lesser degree for women culturally in the U.S., where we are right now on this podcast recording date.

As a man, you gain, no one's like, man, I knew he came out just to get all that pussy. I knew he bragged about sucking dick so all those girls would like hit on him. Man, that's a genius move. That is 4D universal level chess. Wow. I'm going to start lying about sucking dick. And then it doesn't work for that guy. It's like, shut up queer.

And we're like, whoa, I thought, I thought y'all were going to like this. And everyone's like, no. I thought you were going to like it. No. It's so true. Like, why wouldn't it? No, guys, like having sex with his girlfriend, like, yeah, and then I'm going to suck his dick.

She's like, what, you don't have to, what is it going on here? Yeah. Like, I go, like, you know. Do you know of any man, for example, that is saying he's by and he's just secretly like, okay, like is that even, that feels like a myth? I feel like they're adolescent people, perhaps. Right, because they're scared to see their. journey. But I think

I think the opposite happens a lot more now. There are a lot of straight guys who are finding out what has been deemed gay is pleasurable and enjoyable to them, even in heterosexual experiences.

Even culturally, if we go back to like the 60s and I hate to be like graphic, but whatever. Like do you think all of our grandmas weren't sucking dick? Sucking dick with something faggots did. You know what I mean? Like, sodomy

laws were there for a reason because there was like the way you were supposed to have good old fashion missionary American baby producing sex. And now like butt stuff for both parties, oral for both parties, toys for both parties. Like that stuff

lived in a much queerer and gayer space historically. I think the fear probably from like straight women dating a quote-a-bisexual man is he's going to cheat on me with anybody of both sexes. And honestly, like, your partner can cheat on you with anybody. They can also become a crackhead.

They can also rob you. Like, there's a million terrible things somebody could do to you. The horrible hypotheticals of, like, what this man will do to, like, break my heart in public, publicly embarrass me. Right. He could also become a cracket. I love that phrase. Yeah, he could also be, he could not just, like, lit crack.

He could smoke it. And also, you shouldn't be with anybody that you're first. first thought is they could cheat on me with that's why I think that's what goes back to Jay saying. It's not that you don't want to be with somebody bisexual, it's that you don't want to be with somebody that you don't trust. If you want to be a monogamous relationship. I feel like people, I know that people still say that, but it feels like such a dated take. It's like, but we're in a bar and he thinks men and women are hot. Great. Let's check out the dudes together. You know what I mean? We relate more now than ever. I just think there's people that are going to cheat on you and people

that aren't and that's that. Who cares which holder sticking it in when they're cheating on you? Because so many more women recently have been able to be like, I wouldn't hate like a male, male, female threesome. Like a MMF porn viewership and like just social acceptance is like on the rise. Who do you, how do you think that happens without bisexual men? Do you think two straight dudes are like, all right, keep you? Stay over there, dog.

Don't make eye contact with me. Stay on your end. And, pimp, we're about to switch. Stop. You know what I mean? It happens with guys are like, man, you're doing a really good job. Like, man, you're doing a really good job. We're killing it.

This is amazing. We're killing this three-season. Yeah. We're crushing it, dude. Like, high-fives and butt slaps. Like, that's what you want. I don't, it's so weird. Because no one ever says, oh, man, I don't trust bisexual women.

Because now, this is girls going on threesomes all the time. And you know I got a herniated dish. I can't do this. That's true. I had never had to, like, be afraid to tell you I was dating that I like lesbian porn. Like, the guys I've dated want me to talk about lesbian porn while I fuck them. Like, what do you like? I love that for you.

Thank you. I love that for you. Yes. I mean, how many things do we think were created because men were in the closet? Wrestling. Oh, wrestling. Wrestling. Wrestling.

Football. Everything. Men's retreats. Oh. Any sort of like, like, okay. Camping. Even, even recently. like the focus on like dudes being like oh yeah but that man skips leg day and it's like you could tell from

his quads and his hamstrings and like and his glutes and his glutes i'm just saying my man doesn't look evened out i mean i like my male friends who i also work out with to have cakes right and you're like what why do we care so much about our booties if we ain't a little bit by that's the you remember the trend that happened when like dudes were like laying on their stomach this happened on ticot and they would roll like a 45 pound barbell over each other. And if it didn't stop at the butt, that person, like, wasn't as cool as the rest of his friends. Yeah.

Like, we're celebrating, and it's definitely younger kids. We're celebrating, like, caked up men. We got a commercial dedicated to hockey butt. Like, we have to start to understand male bisexuality is not only valid. It's kind of, like, super honest and cool. I love it. I mean, it's such a shift because I go back to Sex and the City where it carries, like, I just can't.

You know, like, we've come so far since that. And we won't have much longer with you. We're going to wrap up. But we just, I would love to talk about the thruple a little bit more. Oh, yeah. Because I just feel like, Ashley wants to get eyeball towered so bad. No, I just like, you know, is it ever, this is the stupidest, like, no pettyest question. Do you ever feel like, are you jealous that they're like getting closer?

Like, you know, they say like three people can't be best friends because two people are going to be a little closer? Like, is it just totally open? Oh, no. I think anytime that like you have a semi open relationship or just like you're doing like non-monogamy and whatever form it chooses to take, you have to like accept that jealousy is like a human condition and like addressing it and like the way you like talk about it and talk through it is like what you do about it. Because like you get professionally jealous. You get like culturally jealous. You get like you have jealousy in any sort of interaction with like other people. be like, oh, okay, well, I mean, I think I look pretty good too. But all right, I guess this person is getting their drinks before I am a bartender. Okay.

That's so true. When I was at CeC and the Hamptons, I was like, guess I'm not hot enough. You're like, all the right. I've been here longer. I've never thought that. All I think is, you can't see me down here. That's what I think. I can't use that excuse. So, like, I get very happy for both of them whenever they, like, get super long. And like, that's something like a lot of, like, kind of like new wave like non-monogamous people like talk about a compersion and how you can like be happy for someone experiencing experiencing joy and experience like sex but like I never get oh oh no I'm so worried I'm so worried yeah I'm so like it just because I know both of whenever you like actually hang out with people together a lot you that like dispels if it's like always you going off on secret dates like those kind of

super open relationships. That kind of jealousy, you start to be like, okay, well, how do you handle that? For a reason. Yeah, because they're gone. Yeah. But like, if it's the three of y'all eating, like, in a restaurant and like everyone's having a good time, first off, the server is like, another three. Okay, great. But like, it's like, you don't get, you don't get mad. You kind of are like, oh, okay, this is, I'm so happy. So that's been my experience. But there have definitely been moments were like, they're close. Oh, they're close about this. We're close about this.

We're closer about this. Like, my two partners, they have so many things that they can talk about because of their corporate jobs. And like, as a stand-up comedian, I'm like, I don't know. What is the spreadsheet? Yeah. Slack. I just got on Slack this past year.

I was like, okay. Like, geez, what are you talking about? But there's so many things that I was happy to see them connect about. And it was like, it took a long time for that to even be like a defundation. find a relationship. Like it wasn't like, oh, we got thrumple from the jump. Like, if anyone who wants to get in a thruple, it's like a long process, I say, because your relationship has to be so structurally and foundationally sound, it was not like falling

over and you needed this other thing to prop it up. This other thing, like, beautified the space and made it even like and brought the room together. Like, right? That is a great piece of guys. Somebody else gave us that piece of advice a couple years ago also that like the best time to open your relationship is not when things are bad. It's when things were really good.

and that like a lot of people defer to open relationships when they're like, I'm trying to, you know, I think this will fix it. And it's actually, I mean, every couple is totally different. But I like this idea that like when it's super solid is when you can be like, I feel confident and less jealous. Let's think about someone else now. And like you still have your rules for those people. You still have like your rules for that primary kind of first partner that will never go away. If the rule is like, okay, like we'll see this person two to three, times a week. They're not going to move in. We love and respect them, but we also love and respect their time. Then, like, you don't deviate from those rules. Well, that was kind of, that's, I mean, I was going to ask about that.

Like, you guys live together. You've been together for 10 years. So naturally, you're kind of the core. So then he doesn't live here. No. Does he date to? I mean, he, he is allowed to. He doesn't currently now,

because he's like kind of back and forth between L.A. and New York. But if he, if he came to us and was like, oh, I really like this guy. I want to go on more dates with him. I'd be like, yes, please. Yeah. Because there's a, there, if you are in a relationship and you start saying mine to everything

about everyone, like you're a megalomaniac. And not everybody has to like that. We had somebody years ago say to us, like, you have to get over your jealousy and you have, no, you don't. If that's not what you feel like that doesn't work for you, then you don't be in that kind of relationship. But it sounds like it works really well for you. Right.

I also think that like, it's just very funny. that is just very funny that so many people are talking about it and the reason that people talk about throuples and like opening up relationships currently is because generationally we all saw what happens when you don't like all of all of our friends were like why my mom and dad hate each other and maybe they didn't start off that way but like because we've been like so scared to like let women want to have like a love of their life that also has a love of their life that also has amazing sex and maybe those two men aren't the same. I know, I can't wait to see Sex Life Season 2, what they do with that.

Did you watch that on Netflix? I heard about it. I heard about the shower scene. Everyone's talking about the dick. I mean, I loved it. It's kind of, you know, it's not the best written and acted show. But it's going to, that's what it feels like that she's going to have them both. Yeah.

And she says at the end, I'm not leaving my husband for you. So it's going to be, I'm curious to see how they play it out. But what about all those people who don't understand that relationships like evolve and like not necessarily have to change but you go, okay, what works now? What didn't work? Like what I said, I said, oh, we were open at one point. We were like open open at one point. Like you could go on dates with other people if you wanted to. Like the rule was just like that person like didn't need to affect our relationship.

And then that ended up being like crazy like time consuming and busy. busy and like just kind of like neither one of us. I was like, I have an amazing apartment and an amazing boyfriend. I'm talking. I'm going to go home. I'm going home. I love that you said that that it can ebb and flow too. Yeah.

I was listening to Dan Savage on, I think, you up maybe. And he was saying how he's been with this partner forever and they weren't open. Then they were. I mean, like, we always just say there's like no rules of the shit. Like whatever works for you works for you. Like I don't know. I feel like people can't comprehend. They're like, well, once you open it up, it's going to be open forever.

It's like, no, I don't know. Not really. It doesn't have to be. It could be or it doesn't have to be. And because like how many people do we know with granddads with like secret families? Right. Everybody I know with an open relationship has had opened and closed.

One person's been open. The other one has not been open. Yeah. There's not like one way to do this. A million parameters. A one side had open relationship. We've seen that. A one side of over relationship.

No, Ashley and I just know what we know one where like the one person is open and the other one's just like, she'll do what she wants to do. I think we're headed towards. a place where people go, this is how my relationship works, which I like, which I like for bisexuality, which I like for, like, for, like, non-monogamy, which I like for, like, the new form of whatever people's monogamy looks like, because it used to be that, like, men, some men didn't even like their women. They didn't even like their female partner. They're like, I'm not just, I don't even like her. And, like, that's been a ball and chain. Yeah, the old ball and chain. That's a

radical shift culturally where people are like, I really like hanging out with this girl. She's funny. she makes me laugh we watch stuff together i'm watching the stuff she's watching girls are going through a lot of stuff man that was whenever my home boy's like man these girls are going to do a lot of stuff that when i knew he like one of my friends started care so much about his eventual wife he was like she's been through so much

and i didn't even do it like our mom's like you know what i mean like those kind of relationships weren't showcased to us enough when we were younger and we're finally getting to like be those examples and I think that's really cool. I love that. I love that. That feels like a good place to stuff. Yeah. Yeah. That's a great way to wrap it up. So we can turn the air back on. Oh, okay. I'm so on. I'm so wet. I want Jay to start glistening. I'm just waiting from them to have like a little glisten. That's what I'm looking at biceps. And because so many people, so many like buy people are like kind of super sexy icons you hold up. That's another thing. Like male strippers exist like in a culture of

bisexuality. Because, like, there's some male strippers that perform for women. Like, in those strip shows, like, maybe at the very end, you see the outline or, like, a dick comes out. But there's so many male strippers that go, I'm performing for whoever. Well, and, I mean, so many, like, of, there's so many male strippers that perform at gay male clubs that are straight, but probably just why. I mean, you're doing pretty gay stuff.

You're doing gay sex work. Yeah. Like, my friend dated a male. Nailstrabroo worked at Swinging Richards in Atlanta. Swinging Richards. They don't want women in there. They'll turn away a bachelor's party. They're like, it says no bachelor's party.

They're like, we're for men. You can come in if you can behave ladies. But the guys that work there, like, they probably run the gamut of full blown, like, straight that they just give laughing answers to men or buy or gay. But anyway, now we're going down a rabbit hole. I never thought we get to a swinging Richards reference. I love that. Well, I'm glad that we got to record with you today.

This is so much fun. So fun. I've been staring at your fingers the whole episode. I know your hands are... We had Usama Sadiqi on the show and he is the longest fingers and we, like, it was like part of half of the episode. He's got like an Osama hand. You could like palm a basketball, no problem.

Yeah. When I was in, I was, well, because my limbs are like, so my arms are like long. Yeah. Anyways, I just, I just want to plug your fingers before we wrapped up. That's what's up. Everyone. Well, Jay, everybody's going to find you and obviously like know where you perform in New York and your Instagram and everything.

So tell everybody everything. Yes. You can find me. online. I'm on Twitter. I'm on Instagram. I'm on TikTok, even though, like, they do not like me there. Like, I got one video taken down. I was like, that's not. With the many you get a video taken down on TikTok, you're like, I'm not, this isn't bad. I can't get in trouble for saying this here. But yeah, it's all just Jay Jordan, no spaces. It's just my name, J-A-Y, J-U-R-D-E-N. And I perform all over the city. I'm at the cellar a lot. I'm at the stand-up to U-U-S.

the stand like I think west side now is open again so you can catch me in New York and I usually put I try my best I try my best this is like the comics conundrum to update my calendar on my website weekly good for you I don't even have a website I try my girl's got to eat well my website my website is actually the stand at YC I see I try I and it is updated and I tweet terrible silly stuff but also thirst trap so I know We had that on the agenda today, but then we got carried away with much better stuff. We'll have you back. We'll do a whole thirst trap tutorial.

I can, if y'all ever want me to help a dude take better thirst traps, I can teach them. Yeah, you have to help my boyfriend. I can teach them. All right, guys. And you know where to find us. Girls got to eat podcast.com. Get tickets to the live shows, merchandise, sign up for the newsletter. Girls Got E podcast and Instagram.

Ash Hess, ran into dot Greenberg, Girls Underscore got eat on Twitter and YouTube.com com slash girls got to eat. We'll see you next week. Have a good week, guys. Bye.