Girls Gotta Eat - Daddy Issues feat. Memer Violet Benson

Episode Date: January 28, 2019

We cozied up in an LA hotel room to chat with Violet Benson of the Instagram sensation @DaddyIssues_ about how she started the 4-million-follower account and quit her boring job, combatting depression, avoiding toxic men, masturbating, and fucking famous people. We also play a round of Psycho or Power Move, recap our LA trip, and discuss what we've been binge watching lately. Enjoy! Follow Violet at @VioletBenson. Follow us @GirlsGottaEatPodcast, and check our website for tour dates and merchandise. Thank you to our partners for this episode! Buffy: For $20 off your Buffy comforter, visit Buffy.co and enter code GGE. Hourglass Cosmetics: Get free shipping with the purchase of a Caution Mascara at hourglasscosmetics.com/gge, use code GGE. HelloFresh: Get $80 off your first month by going to HelloFresh.com/gge80 and use code GGE80. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

But fuck, definitely athletes. Okay. With a condom. Without a doubt. Used to and a dental dam. Yeah. Like wear a whole like suit. Hazmat suit.

Like you're an orthodox shoe. Just like cut a hole in the hazmat suit. Yeah. A dental dam in it and a condom. Welcome back to another episode of Girls Got to eat. Welcome back. And welcome back to New York for us. Welcome to New York.

What song is that? It's been waiting for you. Taylor Swift. All right. Well, before we get started. More singing in 2019 for me. Get excited. All right.

What are we talking about today? We have a guest. Her name is Violet Benson. She has the Instagram account, Daddy, as she is. Cool. So we're going to be getting into it. We recorded with her when we were in L.A. So I'm excited to have her on the show.

Yeah. So just full disclosure, we are back in New York, in my apartment, recording, and we recorded with Violet in L.A. So we're going to do this intro and recap our trip and all that kind of stuff. And then we're just going to shoot over to the interview. But we recorded that interview in the Dream Hotel, which I still miss. We were actually really fortunate to stay in two hotels while we were away. So we split our stay between two places.

We stayed at the W in Beverly Hills. And then we stayed at the Dream Hotel in Hollywood. Both of them were amazing, actually. The whole hotel was beautiful. The food was incredible at both of the. them. Oh my God. A pool at both of them was incredible.

Right. Like, we are so, I forget that regular fancy hotels just have pools and beautiful courtyards in New York. You're just like, yeah. I mean, have fun with a million dollar a night hotel to get a pool. Like every, they were both so stunning. And the smell, the smell on those hotels and the design. I mean, the dream hotel, I mean, both of them, but they just, there was like sunshine

and like, oh, free croissants at the dream. I walked downstairs a morning. I was like, I saw a case of quassons. So I was like, are these free? They were just free. What? Just sitting out there. They were so nice.

You had coffee on the rooftop deck every morning while I slept in. I hope I'm like a good person to share a hotel room with. I feel like I get up to like seven and sneak out really stealthily so you can sleep. Well, in that, so in the W, that was a nice sweet. So it was like a totally separate living area with the couch and everything. So that was perfect. The W bed. The W bed is the best bed.

I mean, oh my God. Both of them were amazing. They were both great, but like I live for a W-bed and then the Dream Hotel. I mean, there's a reason why they get to call it that. So check out both of those hotels if you guys are in L.A. are really all over the country, but we really love staying there. It made our stay really convenient. They're both really conveniently located.

We didn't know we were doing hotel plugs, but these are not even plugs. They're just like this made our lives. But the rest of the trip in L.A. was great. We did two shows in the Hollywood Improv. We love that venue, obviously, like, such a classic comedy venue. Emma Wilman, who was on our show, was part of both. of our shows there. Yes.

Great crowd, great staff. The most beautiful crowd. I mean, all you guys are beautiful, but I mean, you know, L.A. is a thing. Like, we looked out in the crowd, we were like, oh. What? What was happening? You guys be up here giving out dating advice? They confirm that dating's terrible in L.A.

Just like everywhere else. Big shock. Dating is terrible everywhere. Well, my dating life in L.A. is great. Why don't you tell us a little about your dating life? in L.A. Hold on. We'll get to get to it.

We'll get to now. But I just still want to also like you mentioned Emma and I just wanted to say again how great she was. She opened both the shows and it came out with us and did a segment with us on stage and hung out with us in the green room. And I just love her so much. I love her too.

And just a little PSA guys about ticketing. All of our shows are available on our website. It's Girls Got Eat Podcast.com. There's links to every single ticket there. If it's sold out, I promise you, we will write that it's sold out. We announce everything on social media. media.

Yes. Please don't DM us asking us what time the show starts. I can't tell you how many people DMed us like while we were getting ready for the show. What times the show start? Like I'm not doing anything else while this is happening. That's all we have to do. So just call the venue if you guys have questions about additional tickets, resale tickets. Yes.

Can't stress this enough. Do not DM me about what time is the show start. Yes. And we do get a lot of, and this is fine. This doesn't bother me. But we just want to let you guys know. Like we've gotten a couple DMs. Like we heard you guys mentioned.

Tampa, when is it? We heard you guys mentioned Toronto. When is it? Every ticket, like every single show will be on our website this second it's on sale. So Raina literally gets it queued up to go up on the website before the venue even has the tickets live. So that is the number one place to go. We're not saying that it's going to be announced there first. We usually announce on social media or we announce on the podcast. But as far as if you're wondering if there's a Tampa show, for example, for sale, that's where you go. And just a little teaser guys on February 4th next week, day after the Super Bowl, we are announcing five more cities. Get ready.

Five more cities. Oh, my God. I can't. So take your guesses. Don't DM us. But we are, these are cities that we have been so excited to go to. And we're doing it. We're going to go in.

So promise you, those will be live on our website on February 4th. We're going to announce on the podcast. So get your credit cards ready, people. I'm really excited. All right. So I want to lead you back to what happened. L.A. because apparently dating for other people is terrible in L.A., but not for you. I know. I got right off the plane and we landed. We're in the Uber to the hotel. And Rana was like,

so what are you thinking? I was like, oh, yeah, I'm going to go meet this guy if I want to come. She's like, what do you mean? You have a date? I'm like, I mean, I don't know. I mean, you can come. She was like, I'm not going to fucking go. I hate when people are like, I have to. this plan with this guy. You can come, you can come. We're not on like a girl's trip. So like, I don't care. Right. Yeah. Like this is a work trip. I mean, Ray and I hang out every second of every day. But so this wasn't like her and I planned a vacation together and I just ditched her for this guy. Also, I said you can come.

But yeah, I don't know. I don't want to get too much into this. But you don't, you know what, this is your life. You give as much information as you want. Yeah. I think people now want to know. No, I mean, I knew this guy from before. we had, like from internet stuff. I don't know how, whatever. I don't need to give too many details. And we hadn't met in person. And so, yeah, I met up with this guy and we hung out every day of the trip.

He's great. He came to the show. He came to the show. I really like him. He was a good sport. Amazingly good sport. Yeah, we made arms. We made.

Good sport, great sports arms. Emma met him. And then she goes, do you, did you hear this? So Emma met him, obviously, because this was really fun too, guys. we did like a 7 p.m. and an 8 p.m. show with a Hollywood improv and like two separate nights. And then afterwards there's like a 930 show. So we stayed for them. We saw Whitney Cummings and Chris Delia and all these people. So it was really fun. And Emma, we all hung out after the shows. But yeah, and so he came to meet me after one of the shows. And he also came to the other show. And Emma goes,

man, I've got to start working out again. Like did you hear her and say that? Like she saw him and she goes, he's inspired me to start working out if that gives you guys any indication. But yeah, I'm not going to say too much, but yeah, I mean, we're in touch. Stay tuned for engagement announcement announcement of 2019. Stop, shut up. Ashley never hears from him again. Just to be clear, I said it, she didn't. Yeah, I didn't say that.

But yeah, you met him, you liked him. He's approved. Yeah, he's great. He's great. I actually really like hanging out with him a lot. Anyways, I also, I continued my tradition of being super attracted to fucking comedians. Oh, my God. Ashley and I were at this comedy show.

this guy goes up on stage and he's so cute and he's very funny and like a few minutes later I just disappeared and she's like where did she go? I saw this guy get off stage and I like I bolted across the camp the venue just to follow him down the hallway to like say what's up. I know we're watching the show and

I was so pissed because I wanted you to see Christalia because he was like on fire he was so funny. Which is why we stayed that night. Why we stayed yeah you were nowhere to be found and I say to the guy I'm with I'm like where the fuck is right? I'm like I'm so fucking pissed right now. And he was like, I think she left.

I'm like, her bag is right here and I'm pissed. I'm like, where is she? Of course you come back and that smirk on your face. I'm like, where have you been? You're like, I was talking to some guy. I'm like, I knew it. I knew it was the comedian that just got off stage before. Got his phone number.

We've been texting. It's fine. He texted you. Yeah. Like to follow up the next day. He did. God, he's definitely a sociopath. He's hot and funny.

And he even said he was like, I know I look like a frat dude. Like, I'm like, here we go. This is rain his type. Not only you look like a frat dude, but it's also a comedian. I'm like, this is your kryptonite. It really is. Stay tuned for the destruction of Raina Greenberg. And then just another funny thing I thought was very funny that a guy, we talked about this guy.

I remember, I don't remember up to which episode, but you talked about a guy that took you on a tour of all the worst places in New York. Oh, my God. This was a really long time ago. I was a really long time ago. I was wearing, but I think it was a coat. So I think it was like early on the podcast. So this guy, like, I wanted this, like, all night date with, we made out. I wasn't, like, super interested in.

It was whatever. I mean, he's sort of in my orbit because we have a mutual friend. But he'll respond to my, to my Instagram stories a lot. And, like, I don't know, no interest in me, really. So, I mean, it's whatever. We got to L.A. And the minute we got there, he's, like, responding to my stories. Like, what are you doing here?

What's your plan? I want to see you. Let's hang out. This is what I'm doing tonight, blah, blah. All I did was say, great, we're going to stay for the comedy show after our show. Why don't you come? Yeah. I don't hear back from it for like six hours.

And then he's like, I'm going to have dinner with my parents. I'll let you know what I'm up to. Never heard back from him. I had to go all the way to L.A. to get ghosted by a dude that was already ghosting me in New York City. I was very, very funny. I wanted it to work. I was like, I just want to let you know that like I wasn't interested

to you on the East Coast and I'm also not interested on the West Coast. He's like, I'm going to fire up this communication just to dump you on both coasts. Yeah, so L.A. was great. I'm going to go back soon, I think. I love L.A. I told you to stay. I know. My Dewey ruins everything. I had to get home to my dog. I know. I was like, should I stay? You were like, yeah, why would you go back to New York? It's fucking cold. We have like weeks off. We came back. And then, but the day we got back, and we took the red eye. So we got back. And it was actually the perfect weather to just do nothing. It was cold and rainy the day we got back. and I just ordered food and, like, watch Netflix all day long.

Yesterday was the best day of my life. It was yesterday, yeah. I never got out of my bed. What did you watch? I've watched the Fire Festival documentary again on Hulu, because I've already watched the Netflix one twice. I watched the new episode of crashing, which the show about comedy on HBO. That's great.

You guys should check out. Oh, yeah. I finished you on Netflix, which I liked a lot. Yeah. I started, I watched four episodes and I was like, just a little slow for me. It's slow. Also, if you've seen gossip, girls, sort of the same thing with murder. Yeah, exactly.

I don't know. What else I watch? That's what I'm watching now. Yeah, we both are just obviously obsessed with the Fire Festival documentaries. I just watched the Netflix one yesterday. I was so excited to watch it. And then I watched some other stupid stuff. I watched two hours of CST Key on MTV.

Ashley's like, you know what? You is really, it's too high functioning for me. I really, I don't want to try to think about anything. I, if you guys to watch this, I can't recommend it enough. If you liked Laguna Beach, you'll love Siesta Key. It is just, I didn't realize it was back on. I was like scrolling through the guide. Like, what else could I stay up and waste time watching?

I was like, Cia's back. Season 2. Oh my God. You know, I know you were really into it. This is the first morning I've ever woken up to not 17 memes from you and all of your thoughts. I was busy. It was first time ever. I was busy watching CSTKee.

Well, I'm glad that we're back. We've a lot of tours coming up in February. So we're going to Boston, Vancouver. in Chicago you guys know, obviously some more dates being announced. We've some amazing guests lined up for February. I know. We just went over all of our guests. We're so excited. Our guests just keep getting better and better. But with that being said, I do, and Ashley also, we, together in this room, I do kind of just want to address some of the messages that we got about our last episode. Because we had Ari Shafir on, who's a comedian that we both like, and obviously

touched on a lot of sensitive subjects. I've got a lot of messages about this one and just want to, like, address them. Yeah. Also, we got a ton of positive book about that episode, which I loved because it was different and it touched on these different things. We talked about drugs and all these different things. I've got an onslaught of DMs about whether or not I should do mushrooms. But anyway, yeah, we did get not a ton, but we got a significant number of messages and emails or whatever about the miscarriage joke that Ari made. So I just wanted to address this from a comedy standpoint and not apologize for it because

we don't apologize for jokes because, We hope that you guys realize that this is a comedy podcast. And that's why it's categorized under comedy. And we make jokes. And in our heart of hearts, we don't think miscarriage is funny. I don't think abortions are funny. I don't think 9-11's funny. We don't think the Holocaust is funny.

Like all of these things are things that I and or other comedians make jokes about. You've a ton. You watch any comedy special. Like comedy is built on sensitive subjects. And just because you make a joke about something doesn't mean that you think it's funny. Like, my mom is in a miscarriage. Raina's mom said three, like we discussed. Like, I've had friends that I've sat and cried with that have lost kids, like lost their babies with a miscarriage or whatever. And I've had friends that have had abortions and all these things.

And it's like, jokes are jokes, you know. And I don't think Rayna and I, neither of us are sitting saying completely mean inappropriate things and then being like, oh, like, you can't take a joke. It's a joke. But it is a joke. And that was a really funny, clever joke that Ari said. He's one of the greats. And we laugh. And it's not, it doesn't take away from us being compassionate women that feel for any woman that's gone through anything like that. And it almost kind of bum me out to like how people say, like how people think that, like how people think that because we laughed at a joke that was just all it was was a joke that like we find that funny or take it lightly, you know. And so I just hope that people realize that the end of the day, this is still a comedy podcast. we added stuff out here and there that we think crosses the line. Don't get me wrong. You know,

we try our best not to offend anybody, but we're always going to offend somebody. And I mean, think of how many times you hear somebody say or you say or whatever, you're like, oh, I want to kill myself. Like anybody that's had suicide and their friend, family group is going to be upset to hear that. Like, anytime you talk about being too skinny, someone with an eating disorder is going to get upset. Like, somebody's always going to be triggered. And I think the miscarriage and the abortion stuff gets super triggering. But you guys got to understand that doesn't mean that we have any less compassion for somebody that's dealt with that. And it was a joke. And we think you are awesome. We love you. Please don't be the people that walk out of a comedy club because you can't

handle the joke. Like it's a joke, you know? Yeah. And so, you know, we're not, we're not going to bash every person that emails us. We're not so sensitive and we can't take it. And I just, I love all the stuff you said. And we're not going to do a PSA every time we get an email about something like that. Yeah, this is once. Like, I want to say this once. And like, I don't have plans. I don't think I've ever made a miscarriage joke in my life. I don't have any on the roster. But I make abortion jokes on stage. It's like, of course I've had, have, A, I'm pro choice, but of course I have sympathy and compassion for any woman that's had to go through that.

Like, I make a 9-11 joke on stage. It's not that bad. I've heard so much worse from every male comedian I can even think of. And people, it's like, Pete Davidson's dad died in 9-11, and he makes jokes about all the time. And when he does a roast on Comedy Central, that's the first thing the other comedians bring up. Like, it is comedy. And, you know, I just don't want to be that person that's a big.

bad person but then gets to lean on like, I'm a comedian and it's just jokes, but sometimes it is just jokes. Right. And we just, we know that you guys depend on us to like do the right thing. And so, I mean, I don't think that we did the wrong things. We're not apologizing. Yeah, I'm not going to apologize. I just think that we wanted to address it. Like, it is comedy. It's here to have fun. We have a lot of guests that come on that have really divisive opinions about things. Yeah. We're super excited that so many people wrote in and said that they love that we had somebody like that on the show. And we, you guys know us by now, you know how we feel, especially about anything that's hard for women, you know? So you know that we're not laughing at someone that's

going through miscarriage. Like, come on. Right. So I'm glad that you said that. And, you know, we talked a lot about do we address this and how to address this. So, I mean, I'm glad we did. I hope you guys feel good about it. I hope you'll continue to come back to the show. Okay. Yes. We're only going to do this once. Otherwise, just stop listening to this show. You don't have to email us. It's just, it's like, people on Instagram, the comment, I'm like, they're like, unfollowed. I'm like, you didn't have to tell me. Yeah, you can just leave. It's okay. You were like, I can't believe you promoted Applebee's unfollow. It's, you can just go.

But we do. We love you guys and we appreciate all the positive feedback. And no one, you know, so we got some nasty comments, but for the most people are really thoughtful in their feedback. And we couldn't appreciate that too. But, you know, you're always going to trigger offends somebody and we can't censor ourselves like that. And if a comedian makes a funny joke and we laugh at it, like, we're going to leave it in.

Yeah. For the most part. Never a rape joke or abuse joke. That's where we travel. You'll never hear that. Just so we're clear. because to me, and just to take this a little bit further, that's where, not draw the line, but I would never do that.

I never make a rape joke. I don't laugh at them. I think that making light of rape makes men think that it's not a big deal and that consent isn't a big deal. So that's very different to me than like miscarriage or abortion or the Holocaust. You know, like it's just, it's not rape and abuse is not something I think it shouldn't be joked about because I think it is an epidemic and I think women joking about it and make light of it makes men think like, oh, this is no big deal.

So just full disclosure, you'll never hear a rape joke on this. podcast. You can quote us on that. Yep. Yep. Absolutely. Okay, I'm done. I'm done. I think that was great. I'm glad that you said that. So with that being said, now we're going to cut to our interview with Violet for the day. Yes, our interview at the Dream Hotel in 3-2-1. All right, guys, we are so excited to introduce our guest for you today. She's an Instagram phenomenon with two businesses. So you definitely know her from Daddy Issues, four million followers. And Violet Benson,

she's also an Instagram sensation on her own. Yes. Did I post a news? I'm kidding. She's actually a person. Guys, welcome to the studio. Oh,

we're here at the dream. Oh, yeah, we're here at the Dream. We already said that. We're watching a beautiful sunset. We are watching the sunset. How do you feel about it? Three girls in a hotel room.

It's so beautiful. Just three single lonely women in a hotel room. I'm just kidding. With my cucumbers. Right. I'm on a new. diet. So like I'm on this new meal plan right now where they're trying to have me like eat a lot. Because my promise. Like frequency? Like all during the day? And I haven't been able to keep up because

my problem is that during the day I'm really busy. So I don't eat as much. And in nighttime, I like to have this thing where I like to eat alone. So I'll sit on my bed and that's when I go through like two pints of ice cream and like chicken wings and like pizza or like anything. So I'm really sick. And then I fall asleep. Like that's how I go to sleep. Oh my God. And fun fact. Shaming her. I did shame. No.

Fun fact. Suma wrestlers to train eat before eat and then take naps to gain weight and so do I. So same. So if daddy issues ever falls through. But the funny thing is I'm not training to be a sumer wrestler yet that you know of. But apparently we're doing the same thing. We're on the same diet. So I'm trying to like change it up now.

It's really annoying. Yeah. I mean, I'm not judging. But yeah, to eat a pint ice cream and like 45 chicken. wings and then just fall asleep isn't like the best diet but it's so it's low carb here you are just with your like right now I'm eating cucumbers cucumbers the cucumbers burn it's I forgot what it is but it's like a fat burning um vegetable vegetable yeah so it like helps you lose weight faster like like salary carrots um cucumbers okay yeah I'm in like boring one but is it just like so hard in L.A

just like walk around and just like I've just like I've just seriously, like I feel so inadequate here. I thought in New York everyone's a model. But then when I talk to New York people, everyone says like, no, in L.A., it's like when I feel more self-conscious because everyone's so, like, made up in L.A., but in New York, I thought everyone's going to be a model on the street. I think everybody's very stripped down. I'm sorry, I interrupted you.

No, like in New York, I don't know. It seems like people are just a little more natural. So, yeah, there's all these models, like actual models. But as a whole, I don't know, people in L.A. are probably a little more just done. with like surgeries and stuff. Oh, yeah, but I don't have any. I mean, I have, I have in years. Okay, same girl.

So it was right, you guys are like the same person. Yeah. Oh, okay. Awesome. Yeah, I have been ears, but I don't have, I don't have anything done because my parents are, like, obsessed with my face. I'm kidding. I mean, I feel like, I just turned 30, so I feel like this.

Are you 30 now? Yeah. I know. It's like, I'm so pretty. You guys are like, what? I thought you were 12 and it's like, no. I just got my period. I'm 30. I just spent 30.

All right. Can you, I know you have to talk about this in every podcast, but can you just give us a brief rundown of how you started daddy issues? I mean, the name, and then we actually want to talk a little bit about daddy issues. No, I would love to tell you about daddy issues. It's so crazy. No one has ever asked me about this. You guys will be the first.

I can't believe we're such pioneers in an interview. We're so good. No one's ever asked. You guys can see my sarcasm. I know you have to say this on every podcast, but we would be remiss if our listeners didn't get to hear it. So just do give us the quick and dirt. Okay, so the quick, what is the American phrase?

Synopsis? Quick and dirty. No. Like, the line down. No. What are we looking for here? The summary. The documentary here is the, this is how it fucking happened.

You know why I forgot? So let's just go. Okay. By the way, you're from Russia and you grew up in Israel. That's why you said American phrases. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I like, I grew up. I've been in America for like,

15 years, but for some reason I still use the immigrant card, and I'm always like, oh, I'm foreign, what's the word? And everyone's like, you stupid bitch, it's bread, like, you should know by now. And I'm like, my bad. You know, sorry, am I let's a curse? Yeah, please. Girl, please. We built this podcast

on Come Talk and swearing. There it is. We haven't addressed Come Talk in a while. I just feel like we don't get to talk about it or not. Okay, so Daddy chooses nothing to do with Come. Great. That's not why I started it. Basically, I used to be an accountant, and a lot of people are surprised by that, but that literally is American dream, is to come to America and to go to college, get a

master's degree, and to have a 9 to 5 and be miserable. Like my dad, like, I'm not kidding. My dad literally taught my sister and I that that's like life. Like, you, to be an adult, you have a 9 to 5 and you're miserable, but that's life, like grow up. So I graduated college when I was 20 because my dad made me and sort of, well, it was competing with my sister. She graduated double major, so I have to graduate double major.

Where'd you guys go? So my sister went to UC Irvine and I went to C-Sons. Completely different. What is that? C-Sond, it's Calcane Northridge. So she went to UC, but I don't mean to laugh. It's just like a school, to be honest, a lot of times you just go there if you don't want to go to like, if you don't want to apply and get rejected by other universities.

Okay. And it was just, I don't know. I hated school. Okay. The point is I finished school at 20 and then my whole thing was like, okay, I'm going to be an accountant. First I want to be, go to law school. then I was like, okay, I'm going to be an accountant. My sister went to law school. So I was taking my CPA exams and I was working in a public accounting firm. I was doing my best. My dream was to become a

partner, this public accounting firm, a partner for people who don't know means the boss, the top boss. And in public accounting firms, it basically, it takes forever to get there. But that was my goal and that's what I wanted to do and I believed in that. So I would come into work at 6 a.m. or anytime before my boss will come in and I would leave work either 11 p.m. or 12 a.m. whenever, after he left, because that was my goal. And I found a few mentors and I was like, I'm going to be a partner. Unfortunately, some of the women in my team made my life kind of miserable. But again, like, I don't blame them, to be honest.

Like, I'm so thankful for them because I think everyone has a path in their life. Yeah. And I think I strayed for my path because I was so wanting to make my father happy and to impress him. Yeah, I wanted to make my father happy. And I wanted him, I wanted my dad to think I'm smart. Yeah. And I think that's kind of why I was like, I'll be an accountant. Right. Because my sister's an attorney. My dad's a bioscience engineer. My mom's a Russian professor and I was like, I'll be an accountant. Well, and a lot of people just, like, if you really dig deep, you just want to make your dad proud or your parents proud, like in life. That's why a lot of people do what they do. Yeah. So it just made sense. And in high school, like, I won class clown by never was like, oh, if I'm weird and awkward, like, I can make money off of this. Were you like really silly or really funny or both? I was sarcastic and silly and funny. And I was like always like,

the life of the party and I was making jokes in school. But accounting, obviously, it's way different in the office. Like, I wasn't allowed to have a personality and I was constantly reviewed about that. But anyway, the women in my team slowly started making my life miserable because they said I wasn't a team player. They didn't like the fact that I was finding mentors above them as partners because partners are not allowed to work with junior accountants. And I was getting on projects with partners because I was building a relationship with them. They made my life super miserable. Like, they yelled like one time, one of them like yelled at me and told me. me. I'm supposed to take you. I'm supposed to get bullied and like, I need to shut the fuck up when

they talk to me and I need to know better. These were women that were much older than you or the same age? Yeah. Because I was the youngest in the program of the team that I was in. So that was another thing that pissed them off. So they made comments about like, oh, I got this job because of my looks versus like my talents or anything like that. And I was so sick of it because when I was growing up, I was being bullied for not being that cute. And then when I was in the accountant, I was already growing into my looks. So now I was being bullied for being cute. So it was kind of like I was so effing sick of constantly anyone noticing my looks because I felt like that, like, who the fuck cares? And I didn't even have social media at that point. So when I created daddy issues, A, I didn't put

any thought into the name. I was just like, I grew up with daddy issues. I'm sure everyone has daddy issues. Girls in L.A. have a daddy who pays for their shit. So that's their own daddy issues. Well, the word is so widespread now. Now it's sexual. I mean, it's just like the word alone. is just everywhere. I didn't think anyone would even know about it. And it was anonymous. And the reason I made it anonymous was because, A, I didn't want to show my face at all because I was so sick of everyone focusing on my looks, whether I'm ugly or cute.

Like, shut up. I don't care. I want people to focus on my personality. And B, those women in my team broke me down, like, so much. And I think, like, also I was probably, like, so lost because I was, like, foreign growing up in America. So I was still finding myself. But, like, I think in accounting, like, they,

broke me down so much. So I think I was like lost and confused and yeah, like I didn't know who I was. So when I created the Instagram, it was more me figuring out who I am because I was so insecure. So the things that I was posting, it was things that I felt like really weird about. So it was easier to post it being anonymous. But in the end, the craziest thing is that people like made me and like they have no idea. But when I created it, like I didn't know what I was making. So I had an obsessive personality where I was like, I was going on like, fuck Jerry and the fat Jewish and I was going on people that they follow them. Because I'm like, that's my competitors. They would like me too. And I would like pictures. That's what I did. Yeah. All day, every day. So it did start in the,

so four years ago, 2014, 2015. Yeah. And then it was memes. It's always been like memes, right? And I was liking people's pictures. So every night, I was like, okay, a hundred people in night. I'm going to like their pictures. Okay. That was like my obsession because it was my escape from reality. Like Every morning I would cry in my car before I walked into work because my life was so miserable and I was so depressed. But like... You had this thing on the side. Like that's it. Like I just had this thing.

Like I don't have friends. No one liked me at work. I mean, some people liked me in the audit. But like that was it for me, you know? So I was just obsessed with it and I kept doing it. But then I was reading what people wanted. So that's how I mean people formed me. So I would post a few things and suddenly look in comments and someone's like, oh, LOL her caption.

But my caption was really short. So I was like, oh, they want a caption. Okay. Longer caption. So I'm known as like meme queen. and I'm known for my captions by Vanity Fair. And it's because people said they liked my captions. So they created me into making longer caption.

Someone was like, I saw likes and comments were more in relationship stuff. And I was like people like that. For sure. So like literally people formed me. So when I formed my alter ego daddy issues, it wasn't me at first. It was this cool girl that I wanted to be. Then slowly I became her. And literally everyone who followed me made me into daddy.

issues and made me into a confident girl. The suddenly I was like, you know what? I am fucking weird and like I like myself now. So now I can help other people feel better about themselves. And now four years later, I set up myself apart from daddy issues again. She became my alter ego again and I call her she because I've outgrown her. Like I feel like she's a little bit more lost than I am. But again, my followers have helped me through this like journey and process.

of the past four years of like finally finding myself for the first time of my life. So, and then, you know, we could talk to you about like your career forever, but we know people don't need to hear like talk about career. But when did you quit the accounting job? Eight months after I started daddy issues, I quit my job. But I think June, July, either June 7th or July 7th was my first post. So 2014 or 15. And then like,

The beginning of January, like January 3rd, the first article came up, came out about me. And it was written by MTV. And they said how I'm a meet, this new meme account. It's for females worldwide changing the game. And everyone should follow it. And that night, like I grew like 20 to 40,000 followers. Yeah. That's not one with Brosting Basic.

It blew up like overnight. Yeah. But it was MTV. It was BuzzFeed. It was late daily. Exactly. It was like everybody just, it was a ton of, I mean, that's, yeah, how it happens. But they were the first ones to notice me.

So I was so thankful. And the minute that happened, I was like, I remember I started crying. And I was like, oh my God. Oh my God. Like this could be a thing. And since I'm an accountant, a few days later, I incorporated myself and I became an LLC. Right. Absolutely.

You were like this can, because we get a lot of emails from girls. People like when we talk about career stuff a lot and like being scared to leave their job and like having an outlet. So like was there a day? Was that when you left the job? Once I incorporated myself, I told myself I have to like, I, I mean, I wasn't talks with somebody about making income, like a client, like a brand. So I kind of knew I'm going to go forward with them and we're going to have a contract for six months, something like that. So that kind of told me, okay, I can pay my rent. Right. Yeah, yeah, for sure. So I did need that and then I quit my job.

Yeah. So I think end of January or February 1st, I quit my job. And then I was like, all right, I have to make money or I can't pay rent. Like, let's go. Yeah. You are like pretty open about, I don't want us to be like, are you depressed? But like you have not right now. You have like anxiety. Not today. We have a lot of people that are like, I have anxiety and I have depression. I would like you guys talk about it. And I don't know. We haven't really addressed it yet. And it seems like you're something that you're really open about. So we're like, we'll talk about it with you. I work really hard to not be depressed and to not have anxiety. Exxiety still comes to me. But I work really hard to not be depressed, especially if you have ever been diagnosed with depression. Like it doesn't go away.

Have you been diagnosed with depression? Yes. Okay. So it's very important for me to constantly be in a positive state of mind. surround myself with positive people. And it's like a lot of work. So people don't even understand sometimes what it means to work really hard to not be depressed. Yeah, what does I mean? Well, it just means, yeah. So not only am I constantly surrounding myself with positive people, I avoid like anything I think negative energy, even or and I do things only make me happy. Like I like now I put myself first. It's like or like I make sure I like avoid dating guys or

shitty because for example, beginning of last year, there was this one guy that I dated that was very negative and was very depressed. And I was like, oh, let me save you. Because, you know, that's how women are. We want to fix everything. And that was my mistake. Because I can't, I couldn't, you can't help someone, A, that doesn't want to help. And B, like, you're not fucking doctor.

And, like, you can't help someone. Like, stop, you know? And I was subconsciously without realizing taking on so much of his negative energy and so much of his, like, negativity. So even when we stopped talking, I sunk into depression for like a month or two. like very deep again and it took me a second to suddenly be like oh shit v like you're very depressed because he affected me so much and that going to show me like like okay i'll tell this to all girls right now girls think it's not a big deal but like when you sleep with someone if that guy's negative even

like a bad person even if they're not telling you negative things when they're sleeping with you they are literally putting their seed or themselves inside of you and you carry that for a month And I'm not even kidding. If you Google this, there's an actual, like, research stuff that found that you don't fully release. You know how you have those thoughts that you're obsessed with a guy after you sleep with him? Yeah, it's oxytocin. It's like the chemical. But you don't release those thoughts until your next period.

So that's why you have. What? Yes. So when a guy, when you're fucking. We talked to this before. Like the chemical response to a woman having sex with a man is an actual thing. Yes. But also if you're sleeping with someone negative, they, you people don't realize that, but they are literally going inside of you.

they're literally putting in their negative seeds inside of you. Yes. And it's so important to make sure that you don't catch that. I also think I just like when I really care about somebody, like the best part about caring somebody is like that their highs or your highs, but unfortunately they're lows or your lows. And like when they are in a shitty place, like you take that on. How could you not?

Sometimes as women, we are so desperate to be loved and to be in relationships, especially when you get older like these days because everyone else seems so happy is that we jump into these relationships a little too fast. and we want to take on someone's lows a little too fast. Like, you got to make sure first that you figured yourself at, then you're good. And that guy didn't deserve for me to take on his lows because he wasn't my fucking boyfriend. And I shouldn't have treated him.

I'm like, he was my fucking boyfriend. But this is what we do. Women want to, like, save this guy. Yeah. I don't want that anymore. I don't want another fixer up. I want, like, a complete human. I just think as you grow up, like, I think that I'm in my 30s, you meet people that

are a little more fully formed. And, like, I'm not looking for, like, a project. And that's not to say, that's not 30. Well, he was 30-something. I don't think... Age doesn't matter. Like, let's be clear. I think these 37-year-old men out here just...

Yeah. I think that people with emotional problems still deserve love and to be dated. Absolutely. You know, I'm not saying that you think that. Yeah. Or that you do. But, like, I'm not saying every person that has emotional issues as a trash person. No, we all have that.

But, like, I think that it's hard at this age to take on a project. But if someone doesn't want to fix themselves, it doesn't want to help you. And you can tell they're a trash person. They're bringing you down to make themselves feel good. Like, that's a problem. Right. But now, okay, so anyway, after that, like, when I realized, like, oh, shit, he's affecting me. It took me, like, I would say two months or maybe a month or two months to really brush it off to understand what's happening.

And after that, I was like, oh, my God, like, I can't, every time I meet a boy and it doesn't work out, I feel like I forget my, like I lose myself. Yeah. Right away, like, a lot of regrets. Is that the word? DiGerman. Yes, you're like, wait, who am I? You forget for a second. Like, who am I for a second?

It cancels out the work you've been doing on yourself. So part of working on not being depressed is that. I was like, from now on, I have to force myself to be happy. So sometimes things did not go my way and I make an Instagram story. And I was just like, okay, guys, so this and this happened, but like, it's fine. It's not a big deal. Like, I'm still being positive. I didn't feel like that.

But I said that to be positive for everyone else. And the weirdest things started to happen. The more I pretended to be happy, the more I actually became happy. Like, I felt happy after I faked it. And I started to learn like, oh, that's helping me. And then like some days I'll wake up and I'm not happy. so then I go look in the mirror and I would literally look in the mirror and I'd be like, you have such a good heart.

You're such a good person. I'm like talking to myself and I know it sounds funny, but like I would literally like, I don't like compliments, especially to me. So I would like, like, get uncomfortable and then I want to cry. So then I'd be like, okay, fine, just cry. And then I'm just like, you're so cute and you have a person. And then I just felt better about myself and I was happy. And it's like a self-affirmation.

I love that. I feel happy. I feel happy. Then you are happy. And it's so helpful. so like all these things, surrounding yourself with good people, good friends,

doing things that make you happy. If it's like masturbating, like I love masturbating, masturbating a lot. Yeah. That's not... We should talk about masturbating. How often do you masturbate?

I try to masturbate once a day. Okay. Sometimes a few times a day, but like it doesn't work out. Sometimes it's like once a week if I'm too busy, which is annoying. But I try.

People that have more orgasms are happier or people who have more sex. I try to masturbate every day. When I masturbate and have an orgasm, I'm like, oh, why are in my nose? not doing this every day. You know, if it's been a couple days and then you're like,

why am I not doing this every day? Do you go through, I go through waves where I'll masturbate every day for like weeks and then I won't even touch it for like a week and a week and a week. But then you go back to it and you're like, why wasn't I doing this yesterday? Right. I wasn't doing anything all morning. All I did was watch the news. I couldn't have masturbated while I watched the news.

Like, what are you masturbating to when you watch the news? CNN, usually I just like pause the morning news and I look with my coffee and I smell like the hazelnut from my coffee. Is there anybody even to masturbate you on the news? Anderson? No, even if he's gay. I guess you could still masturbate to him. I don't even watch the news.

I don't know. I have a Jake Tapper. I like, I'll masturbate to J. Tapper's cute. Do you guys not watch porn? I only masturbate personally currently, so it changes.

But right now in my life. News and she's like, okay, losers. You're masturbate to CNN. Ever heard of porn? Research found that women masturbate to fantasies and memory. Absolutely. And I'm masturbate to memories. Masturbate to porn.

100%. And like I even, I'm not going to share which memory it is. but like I have a solid go-to memory from an ex of mine, like a super hot sexual encounter that like all cue up. Really? Yeah. I have such bad memories that sometimes when I try to do the memories,

like the other day I tried to masturbate. But like in my head I was just like trying to focus so hard that my, in my brain like it was just switching off between the guys that I've dated like anyone to try to like get me off. I do that too. I like mine it. I'm like, and I was like. And I was like.

And I was like switching off the different guys. And I was like, uh, fuck. I hate all of them. I can't come. So I couldn't. Maybe I distilled it. Sometimes I like porn.

Do you watch porn? No. It's not even... I'm kind of... I feel like I should get more into it. No, I mean, not if you don't want to. I go to wait. What's your zodiac sign?

Cancer. Okay, what's yours? I'm a Gemini. Is this like, there's different porns for different porn categories for different like zodiac signs? Oh, no. I was asking because... She was down with the conversation.

No, I was asking because like, Scorpio's are very sexual. Not to be sexual. So, like, I watch porn. I like that stuff. Yeah. But I'm sexual with like a partner. I also like to date. I like to be kinky with a partner.

I don't like, I wouldn't be kinky with like various different. I wish I could, but like I just would get emotionally attached too fast or obsessive. So like the guy, the guy like it goes inside of me and right away I'm like, when are we meeting your parents? And then he's, you know. So let me ask you this. I'm curious about this. If you've dealt with like anxiety and depression, do you have to watch yourself to make

sure you're not looking to someone else to make you happy? Like have you dealt with in the past where you're like, I have to make sure I love myself and I'm totally happy with it myself before I date somebody seriously. But it's crazy now that when I date guys now, like I've noticed more recently, the guys that I've dated, I've gotten over them. Usually, like, I can date a guy for a month, and then it would take me two months to get over that person because I start questioning myself, like, why does he like me, blah, and I think I even wrote a blog called, um, why don't you like me or why don't you, or no,

a boy doesn't want me and that's the end of the world. And it's like a little cute. Maybe we can read it later. It's so cute. I like that. I'll look it up in a second. And that was like the beginning of the year. But for some reason now, I feel like when I learned more to be more confident, I'm getting like, I was talking to a guy for two months and it took me a week to get over him. And that was very different for me. Well, you're probably just like love yourself more, right? Like you're happier with yourself? Yes. But then of course it's your ego. It's not like, I need a guy to complete me. No, but it's your ego that comes in. Like how, like it was more like, how dare you not fucking like me? Like, are you kidding me? Like, are you kidding me? But, or like, why does he like this girl? And then you want to compare himself this girl. And then you're just like, wait, you know what? That guy's a loser.

If he doesn't like me, like, what a fucking loser? I think as you get older, we all get that. I certainly have. I used to, like, analyze every single thing about the next person my ex is dated and things like that. And now I'm just like, I don't know. Like, I think I'm a cool, fun girl. I'm not the prettiest girl that's ever lived.

But like, we don't put yourself down. No, I'm just, I know I'm not a town. I know what I am. I'm smart. I'm never going to be, but that's a thing. I'm never going to be the greatest. You're never going to be the prettiest girl. Like, you have no idea how many times, like, I feel confident in the morning.

And then, like, afternoon or night, I'm just scrolling through Instagram. And there's, like, beautiful girls. Like, literally every day, a new one is born. It's insane. And, like, they keep coming younger and younger. These 14-year-olds have tits. They're, like, up to their, like, chins. And you're just, like, how?

R-I-P, my perky tits. I'll get new ones. But, like, there's so many pretty girls. So I have moments that I'm, like, in the morning, I feel so confident. And then by afternoon or night, I'm just like, fuck, like, there's another pretty girl, another pretty girl. Like, this is why this boy won't like me. Like, I can't compete.

Like, oh, my God. Her eyes are so wide. Like, this girl's hair is so long. Like, oh, my God. Like, I don't look like that. And then you're just like, it's exhausting. Well, first of all fake. But what I was also going to say was like, I think as you get older,

you just learn that it's not personal. If somebody doesn't like you, you're not going to change your whole life for them. And I start to look about guys who get in serious relationship. And I'm not saying they don't choose those very beautiful Instagram models that are on the internet. They're showing their ass or boobs, whatever they're doing, like, for themselves or from whom,

ever. But I have noticed guys who had been dating more seriously, I start to look and they end up for some reason when they're sitting and liking all those Instagram models pictures, they end of dating the more like regular looking girl, not that I'm saying again there's anything bad about either thing. Yeah. But it kind of told me that looks are not everything. And I've talked about even with my guy friends who said, yes, those girls are nice to look at. But like a lot of them like it's a personality like after two minutes, you can't care. I mean, obviously you want to feel better and you just hope like every beautiful girl is just so fucking annoying. You're like, yes.

Right. So I'm sure like there's so many beautiful girls that are just like amazing and that's great. But there's the perfect match for every person out there. So you just can't sit and compare yourself to every other person. You're just like, it's too painful. You're literally just hurting yourself. Right. Well, okay, we're going to end up playing this.

I'm just watching the time. So we're going to end up playing this game with you. But really quickly, I want to like talk about your dating life. Are you dating? Not at the moment. Although I recently decided... Like you decided against it or you're like open? No.

I feel like I'll be too open to admit this. Okay. So I was dating a lot the past 2018. I dated like almost like every other month or every two months or whatever because I was trying to for research. And I just like was trying to speed it up like the dating process to figure out what I like, what I don't like. It's been really helpful anyway. And then ended up being like some shitty guys, some okay guys. none of them were a match.

So then this year, I haven't started dating yet. But in my head, I decided I picked who's going to be my future husband. He just doesn't know it. You pick the person specifically? Yeah. I literally saw this person. I looked at that person and the minute they walked up to me in my head, I go, that's going to be my husband.

In a public place. And it was like, fucking McDonald's. Like, where did you see this person? I don't want to give too much information. That's okay. But you've met this person? You met him. Yeah.

It's not like a person on the internet. sounds like I'm doing a joke or a bit or it's like a daddy issues moment but like that happened to me recently will that person become my husband I don't know but in my head I was like that's going to be my husband I just decided it so I'm not like pursuing it right now because I don't have time I'm working but I feel like that guy's that's going to be it and I'm going to marry this person so I'm chilling does he have a girlfriend I don't know I know he knows he knows name yeah yeah I do first and last. I don't even know if we're like a good match.

Like we've never dated. We've never hooked up. But I just made a decision when I saw him. Look, I decide this about a guy every month. What's the next? And then I'm always like let down. So like good for you. If that works out for every month I decide that.

Do you have a move? Are you just like the universe will take care of it? The universe will take. Because I've never thought about about a guy before. So are you considering yourself off the market? No, no. I'm still going to date. Because maybe I imagine.

Someone asked you out. You're like, I'm taken. No, no, no. No, I'm still going to date, but that's so funny. Imagine I was like, no, so currently I'm taken. He just doesn't know him. He doesn't know me, but we have a long future together as soon as I introduce myself to him. So you're still open and how do you date?

Like, do you do you do the apps or no? The past year, I, 2018, I dated by either in the beginning, it was like this dating up called Raya. I met a few guys off of that. And then, like, my confidence, I've just like being. so good to myself, then then I'll be like, I think a guy's cute. I just DM them. So how do you find them? You just like on your story? I see someone on Instagram that I think is cute. From Violet Benson, somebody with a million followers just slides into their DM. Yeah. What do you say? Well, usually, everyone in 2019 that I've dated has been in the same industry as me.

Okay. In entertainment. Okay. So it's not some random like guy that works at Salesforce. Now that there's anything wrong with that. We just always use. We love Salesforce. Like, we have tons of friends of work there. It's our go-to standard job. 2018 I dated more, I dated like athletes, musicians, actors, because I was like, all my model friends are doing it. Like, I deserve it. Like, I want to try this out too. And then, by then the year, I was like, you know what?

I deserve so much better than this. I don't, because dating guys and entertainment, a lot of them, not all of them, but all of them happen to be sleazy or they kind of make you feel kind of alone or confused all the time. And they're cheating on you. It's kind of like a lifestyle you have to be okay with. And I'm not okay with that. So I want like love, like I want real love. And sometimes I'm like, am I going to die alone because this real love doesn't exist anymore?

Have you been really in love before? I used to think I was, but I don't think so. How, what was the story there? Do you mind me asking? Were you going to launch a relationship? Yeah, I was on off with someone for like six, seven years. Oh, wow, like a really long time. But it was only we were so toxic for each other and we stayed together because of our egos.

We're so wrong for each other. and we made each other miserable. And we kept getting back together because we just didn't want the other person to be with someone else. And we literally, and he cheated on me all the time, and I was psycho, and we loved making each other's life miserable,

and we had great sex. And I think towards the end, I hated when he would even talk. Like, so he would talk, and I would just be like, oh, shut the fuck up. Like, why they're having sex or like, I'm leaving. Yeah.

Because I hated him so much. Yeah, but once I started daddy issues, and I started, like, working on myself and loving myself more, Like, I completely ended it and I never looked back in it. He's married now. Okay. So I feel like me moving on really helped him move on too. You did him a favor.

So if you have to fuck Mary Kill, athletes, musicians, actors, what's your choice? Like, I want to know who's the worst. Love this. Athletes, musicians, or actors. Shoot, because the musicians part, there's one really terrible person and one really great person. Oh. So that's really hard. But fuck, definitely athletes.

Okay. with a condom. Without a doubt. Use two and a dental dam. Yeah. Like wear a whole like suit. Hazmat suit. Like you're an orthodox shoe.

Just like cut a hole in the hazmat suit. Yeah. A dental dam in it and a condom. Because everyone should get the experience like what are like six, nine foot body feels on top of you. Ashley, she's masturbating right now. That's all I did in college was fuck athletes. All right. Good for you.

Fuck athletes. Fuck athletes, you can relate. And then kill, I guess, actors. Why? And marry musicians. I figured that was what we were. Why kill the actors? Because actors can be sociopaths because you don't know what you're working with

because they're acting for a living. So they're just like pretending to be someone else all the time. Musicians are writers like me. And I'm a writer. A lot of musicians are writers. So I'm more in tune with my emotions because I like to write. So musicians are just like. They're emo.

They're emo. And I love it. Then we're both like, we can just like fuck and cry and fuck and then fuck while crying and cry while fucking. They can write you a song and just like, I like the creativity. I like, well, that's the thing. I think musicians, yeah, probably more emotional issues, but actors sociopath. Yeah.

Like usually a lot. It's like a known thing, but like some actors are legit sociopaths. Yeah. So are you, what's your ideal? We don't need to ask you to defining details about your new man. But like, do you like, do you like? He doesn't even know he's my man. Your man is not your man.

You see that's my favorite meme. Congratulations to all the girls who got over the man who's not the man. Raina, we both have like a man who's not our man. I made that meme. You did? It's organic. I love that.

Oh my God, you created my favorite meme. Yeah, I have a man who's not my man right now. Oh, but he knows that you're dating. We spend like a ton of time together. Oh, fine doesn't know we're dating. No, they're not dating. He knows that we hang out a lot and we talk a lot.

He knows that we're not having sex with each other. Oh, he's aware. of it. So do you, are you good with like a regular dude? What do you want? You want to just like, would you date an accountant? Yeah. At this point in my life, I realized that I dated guys entertainment for fun just to see what it's like, but like it's very rare to find like a good one in my opinion in that type of industry. And I think that's why a lot of times entertainment, like you end up being single for a while in that type of industry or like you end up getting cheated on and they, you see how those celebrity couples constantly moving on with someone new.

And I think it's exciting and it's fun, but like it's like either do I want that or do I want love? And I really do want love. I feel like I'm deep inside when I'm not showing my Russian ways where we're kind of cold. I'm a very loving person. I just want to be loved. I want to love back. And I have so much love to give. I want to find someone I can give that to them and I can't and I can be myself with.

Right. And I at this point now I'm not looking. I wouldn't date someone from the same industry as me. I would date someone in behind the scenes. So whether they're an accountant, an attorney. Can I ask you a question? Is it very specifically you question. Do you feel like, do you worry about the people that you date

because they might use you for like your level of, you've built like two huge businesses? Like, do you worry the people like look at your level of celebrity and they might use you? And is that like, or they just like you because they think you're famous, you know, like that kind of thing. I do have that worry, which is like kind of shitty. because A, it's annoying someone's today being daddy issues

because sometimes some of my jokes are more extreme and all that. And like, I don't want to date someone that I constantly have to explain myself. Like, hey, this meme isn't about you. Or like, hey, I'm acting extra crazy right now. This is just to be funny. Don't take you personally. It's annoying if I had to repeat myself. And B, like, a lot of guys want to date me because it's the idea of me.

You know how in Gone Girl? She talks about the cool girl. Yeah. Daddy issues literally is the cool girl. Daddy issues talks about, A, no, about fucking, sucking dick, getting on your knees. like getting drunk, like being wild, getting crazy over you because she likes you so much. And, you know, it's like, it's so great. And a lot of times these guys that want to date me because they like the image and they don't

want to get to know like my fears and like they don't want to get to know the real me. So I think I had instances where I go out with someone and they like me because it's exciting. But the minute I get real or I'm annoyed or I'm a regular person or like, yeah, like I'm a regular person. I'm just like bored because I'm not giving them like the anal talk that they're, looking for, whatever. So it can hurt my feelings. And one thing, one of the instances last year that actually hurt my feelings, and I can't believe I'm sharing this, is that I was out with a few friends

and one of my guy friends and we're out. And then I was like, hey, I hooked up with one of the guys on your show a few months ago. And he goes, wait, babe, I know exactly who. And he said the name. And I was like, wait, how did you know? He goes, oh, because I guess after you guys hooked up, he came up to me when we're on said. And he was like, yo, bro. And he said. And he was like, yo, you know daddy issues, I fucked her. And I was like, I just got chills all over my body. That would happen to us. That would be like, oh, you know, that chick there runs, bro is being basic.

Like, I fucked her. Like, it just, I feel, like, feel for you. Like, I know your account's bigger, but no. But, like, that made me feel bad. Like, ugh, I feel for you with that. It was, it was obviously mean. And I was like, oh, my God. Thank God it.

It didn't work out with that guy because that's, like, messed up. But it's because daddy issues, it's, it's this, like, I think boys look at it. like, A, older girlfriends and ex-girlfriends follow Daddy issues. So if they bang me, their ex-kos are going to get jealous. Like, a lot of times guys DM me and they're like, can I take you on vacation to make my girlfriend or my ex-girlfriend's jealous? Like, shit like that. Because I think women already feel like an object and this diminishes you even further into an object. You're just an Instagram account. But it's also like, to me, you have a separate whole giant account of that's just you. So it's weird that people, like, to me, daddy issues is like this meme

account that's your business that you started. Like, it's not Violet Benson anymore because Vyla Benson's, like, it's on Instagram. Yeah. I mean, whatever. Like, that's going too deep in it. But that's why it's important, like, that's why it's important to just surround your, and sometimes even guys that you date in entertainment, because Hansel guy was an actor, or like the last guy that I dated was a social, last guy dated was kind of a social climber. Then, like, we stopped talking. The next day he found someone else that, like, was more famous than me. And I was like, oh, cool. That's what it's about. And I was like, all right. But, now you just have to take it and keep moving.

Like you can't, I'm not going to like let like, oh poor me, he wanted to use me. You know what? Like, I was a fucking idiot. I didn't see it. I'm going to see it next time. But I'm also not going to close off my heart. You're not an idiot for not. I always say this on the show. Women should be allowed

to enjoy themselves. Women should be allowed when a guy likes them to just enjoy it. And not have to be skeptical of everybody. Right. To think like this guy likes me because I'm pretty and smart and fun not because they want something from you. Exactly. And honestly, how pathetic. And I'll be so honest, I find it so fucking pathetic that anyone would try to go out with someone else because they have followers on Instagram or because they have a check mark. Like,

how sad is your fucking life that that's why you want to go out with someone? Like literally, what is even followers? I think that, I think that somebody looks at you or like, Ashley, I'm not going to be like, oh, we're on the family. But I think Ashley and I have a cool job. We sell out all these live shows with this big prize. I think somebody looks at it and thinks that you're cool, but you're a novelty to them. I just feel. I feel like I'm such a regular person. I don't even think about the amount of followers I have. I'm just doing my job every day and I'm just being myself.

And sometimes people know who I am because they appreciate my work. And I'm so thankful for that. And that's it. And I'm not going to. And if someone I ever dated someone that then said like, it's so cool to your daddy. Because I told my friends, then I'll be like, get the fuck out of my house.

Totally. That's my worst fear. And for me, like, mine's even worse because these guys want to be on the account. Like, I'm an account of men. So these guys, like want to be a part of it and like be featured.

And it's just like, I know guys have hung out with me because that before. You know, like, I feel like we've all been there. I feel like I've been there. Like one of the musicians, guys I liked, and like in the beginning of the year that ended up being so negative, I like was like, oh, I can put your new song on my online on my playlist. That's also normal. You should be allowed to like be proud of your partner and promote them

and not feel like you're being used. You don't realize that you're being used because you're just like, but again, don't do that shit in my opinion. anymore until that's your man. Until that's your boyfriend. Thank you so much. And again, this isn't going to resonate with everybody. But, like, that is my exact thing.

I'm not helping you until we're boyfriend, girlfriend. That is a blanket of thing. You start giving people all these things. You don't have an Instagram following to use that as like, true. Don't be doing all this shit for people that ain't you a man. Yes. And they always say that. And then I'm the dumb bitch that does it.

So, no, but it's fine because it's so much easier to give a device and to actually follow it. No, of course it is. No, of course it is. But, like, we got this email. We did the episode about commitment And this girl was just like And I don't blame her Because we've all wanted to write this email

She's like We spend all of our time together And it's basically we're dating He's over here all the time I met his friends and his family Of course I do all these things for him Why won't he commit to me? It's like he's not your man

Okay so every week we play a game with somebody We thought this one would be really funny for you We had a listener submit this So we play this game called power move or psycho Or Psycho or Power Move We play this game called Psycho or Power Move Maybe she's a dyslexic.

I'm improvising, guys. We have people send us the craziest things they've ever done, and we judge whether... It's called power move or... Psycho. Well, it's called Psycho or Power Move. It's fine. Oh, shit. Sorry. The whole game's ruined.

I'm inflexic. It's called Power Move or Psycho. Psycho or Power Move. They both can even pee, and it doesn't diminish the importance of the game. Okay, go. So we got emails. We're going to read them to you, and you're going to decide if it is a power move or if it's psycho.

Okay. Which one do you want to start with? I screen shot. Me thinking a guy is my husband, even though he does you know it? Actually, I love this. You already did yours. I guess it's psycho, but once I marry him, you guys will say it's a power move. So when you guys, when you get a ring on the finger, come back.

We'll have you back. Yes. And we're going to. And it's going to be a power move. Well, it's good because we wanted to ask if you had any, but you already shared it. You already get yours. All right. Psych or power move.

I was sleeping with a guy in university. So they're British, right? That's how people they say it. And Canada, too. I was sleeping with this guy in university and was ghosted by him. I knew it wasn't going anywhere, but regardless, kind of like the dude. I was offended when he ghosted me. My friends and I were driving around one night in the city and we're talking and I jokingly said

I should take a dump on his front lawn because he was a piece of shit. My friends were all for it and were not really rational being. So we stopped the car. I got out and left a huge sizzling shit on the welcome mat while my friends hysterically laughed in the car and watched. Recounting this gives me the chance. chills because it was a really good shit. It was smooth, no wipe.

So basically the most satisfying shit of all time. I know Raina loves a good shit. So psycho or power move? The shit on the welcome mat. Well, what do you think? Sorry, I'm just so shocked. Yo, what the fuck? No.

I mean, do you guys want to say power move? Okay, here's the thing. I don't, I would say psycho. I question the validity. of this because I just couldn't, I'm just not savage enough to take a shit like that. I just like, I feel too much pressure and to like do it. All your friends are watching from the car. When I was in high school, this one boy was really rude to my friend and he cheered like shit.

So we were really drunk and we were like, someone was driving who was sober and we were driving off in the car. And I got out the car and I was like, wait, that's that guy's car. And I got out and I peed on his car. Pea I could do. And then I got back in. and that was revenge for my friend. Pee, I could do, I've, like, peed on guys' beds in a friend house. Do I think it was, like, would it be a different story if I was 30 years old doing it?

Yeah, like, I'd be like, bitch, you good? Like, are you okay? You know what makes it's less psycho? It's funny when you're 15 and you're doing it. You know what, it's less psycho because she's with her friends. Like, it's funny that you, if you did it by yourself. Oh, my God. Like, you literally are in your apartment.

You're like, you know what? I got a shit. So I'm going to go over to Billy's house and shit on his doorstep. That's insane. You like eat a bunch of Indian food and you're like, you know what? I'm going to go over to shit on this guy's doorstep.

I mean, yeah, you're right. It's funnier because it's like a funny thing to do. Right. Because she did it with her as friends and she's clearly university because she could still be 19 doing this. I'm at the point of my life now. I'm just always so tired.

Like I can't do stuff like this. Wait, my ex-boyfriend used to cheat on me so much when we were younger. That one time he texted me and he was like, and I was so stupid and oblivious. He was like, hey, V, do you have that dick pick of mine that I sent you before? Can you send it to me?

and I was like, why do you need it? I don't get it. He goes, what the fuck? Just fucking send me the dick, I just want to have it so I can look at it. And it was literally to send it to other girls. And I was like, oh, oh, okay, babe, my bad. And I sent it to him.

So I can look at it so I can look at my own dick. It was to send it to other girls, obviously. I need a minute with this one. That is so crazy. You know it's so he can send it to other girls. And you still sent it. All right. You know what, babe, you can have it.

He's getting like so pissed. He's like, because I want to fucking look at it. Just let me the fucking dick. It's my dick. It's my dick. Yeah. Yeah, literally. And I was like 19 and I was just like, oh, all right.

My bad. I'm sorry, babe. Right, you're 19. You're just getting guilted into this. And then every time I'd be like, hey, are you? Give me back that dick. I did. It's my dick.

And every time I'd be like, are you, are you cheating on me? What's happening? He goes, oh my God. For you to, the fact that you even think that I would ever cheat on you, but if we don't have trust, we don't have anything. This is the scumbag monologue. Yeah. And the fact that you do even say that to me just proves to me, you know what?

I'm going to need some time for myself. And I was like, oh my God, I'm so sorry. It made you feel that way. The most, the crazier they are, my friend dated a guy for years, or I don't know, for years, that was like a secret sociopath. He was married with kids. And so every time she started to pick up on clues and, like, confront him, but he went wild.

He was like, how could you not trust me? And then turned it around on her. like how could you not trust me? And he's like, oh my, of course. The crazier that's always when someone's cheating on you, then they're more like, then they always think you're cheating on them. And that's when they also overreact. Yes. But they turn it around on you. Like that's just a like standard sociopath move. 100%. Remember that guy? You can find a guy about something and he somehow flips the script. Exactly. Yeah. I never talk about this guy on the show, but I dated something I really liked for a while.

I went out with his friends one night, not with him. And like his palace of lies just came like pouring down. Like it turns into me to throw him out of the bus. it was just like, I said a thing and they were like, well, that's not, that ever happened. And then like, because the one thing didn't happen, the other thing couldn't happen. So anyway, when I keep friends together now. Yeah, we're going to be the one that got away.

He's the one that got away. We're getting married, like you and the guy that you haven't met yet. You guys should double date. With your men. It's so funny because I'm like, legit, 100% serious about this guy that I was like, that's why it's funny. You got to keep a spouse.

When I confronted this guy, I think I said one sentence. I was like, so it hurts me. interesting things about you. The level of ballistic he went on me was so crazy, calling me names and swearing at me. You just know. When 70's like, oh, I'm sorry. This was going somewhere else. Oh, okay, my bad. Whoa, I completely read this completely wrong. That's how you know. When you know, you know. All right. So should we wrap up? Yeah. I want to thank you for being here and I want to plug all your things to talk about like what you have coming up. I had so much for having me. I had so much

fun for being here. Just so we're clear, we're like sitting on beds in this hotel room. Like, this has been very casual. It's just like a sleepover. Actually was like, please make sure they have a conference room at the hotel. Did you ask them about a conference room? Today I was like, she's just like a normal girl. I was like, you're right.

Fuck it. We just don't know. She doesn't deserve special treatment. Let's make sure it's by the dumpsters. Violet, sit on the dumpster. That's where you belong. Also just like, let's be clear, as New Yorkers, we're used to teeny tiny hotel rooms where we'd all be like crouched on a single bed.

So at least this is spacious. Yeah. We got you a conference. which decided you should sit out of bed. This is great, right? Yeah, this is... I'm good with anything. I was, you know, eating my cucumbers and having my water. I laid on the bed a few times. It's been really relaxing. Great. Okay. Where do you tell... Where can everybody find you?

They already know, but... So, yeah, I have my Instagram, Viola Benson. I also have my other Instagram, Daddy Issues underscore. I have my shop, shop Daddy Issues, but it's... I'm changing it up to more limited edition things once a few couple of months, because I don't have time to fully run it. but some dope stuff, very feminist stuff on there. And this year people should be looking forward to seeing me having a show on IGTV,

Snapchat, and on TV. On a regular television. Yeah. Wow. I mean, is it under wraps? They should be. Yes. And I love to look for me on TV.

Also, you're going to be getting engaged this year? Yes, I may be getting engaged this year. So look out for that. We'll be playing for letting. Stay tuned. And for the, I think you'll do it on your TV show that you can't announce. No, no, no, the TV will be like me as a host. So it's not like a reality TV show.

But maybe we'll get married on it. Who knows? I mean, stay tuned. I don't know who our sponsors will be at for the wedding. But we like Zola for wedding registries. We do. We really like them. He doesn't even know I'm even considering him.

But he's so lucky that I'm even considering him. Honestly, he should feel so lucky. He's so lucky we're getting married this year. Yeah, I can't wait to have kids with him. Oh, do you want kids? Yes, I haven't even asked them yet if he wants kids. I don't know how to sneak it in. It's because you haven't talked to them about anything.

Like, hey, what's your last name? Do you want kids? Yeah, so just look out for me. I just want to make sure to just be everywhere. So I'll be like super fucking annoying. And everyone's like, do you know daddy? She's, yeah, I know, daddy. She's so annoying.

I see her everywhere. And it's like, good. Mission accomplished. So look out for me and my face and my voice. God bless. All right, guys. You can look out for us. on Instagram at Girls' Gotta Eat Podcast.

You can always go to our website, girls got to eat podcast.com for tickets, merchandise up to the minute, every single thing, probably. Up to the minute. Yeah, about shows. Subscribe rate review. Thank you so much for having me again. Thank you.

Thank you. This is a blast. All right. Bye, guys. Bye guys. Have you a week. Bye.