Girls Gotta Eat - Hoe Phases, Trust, and Working Together with Lauren Riihimaki and Jeremy Lewis of Wild 'Til 9

Episode Date: February 20, 2023

We're getting wild with our friends (and newly engaged couple) Lauren Riihimaki (aka @LaurDIY) and Jeremy Lewis of Wild 'Til 9 podcast. We chat about the roller coaster of their dating origin story, Lauren's surprising opening line, trust and privacy, how to feel about your partner's sexual past/hoe phase, and tips for making a relationship work when you live, work, and play together. We also discuss why men tend to drift apart from their friends when they get into relationships when women don't. Before our guests join us, we're talking about knowing when to say yes to a trip and when to say no, and unpacking the "Are we dating the same guy?" Facebook groups. Enjoy! Follow Lauren on Instagram @LaurDIY and YouTube, Jeremy @jeremymichael22, and check out the Wild 'Til 9 podcast. Follow us @girlsgottaeatpodcast, Ashley @ashhess, and Rayna @rayna.greenberg. Visit our website for tour dates, merchandise, and more. Shop Vibes Only. Thank you to our partners this week: Hello Fresh: Go to hellofresh.com/gge65 and use code GGE65 for 65% off + free shipping! Native: Get 20% off your first order at nativedeo.com/gge or use code GGE at checkout. Shopify: Get a $1/month trial period at shopify.com/gge. Rocket Money: Go to rocketmoney.com/gge and it could save you hundreds a year. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The thing that we were going to start our life together with was a complete fucking line. Right. Okay. Totally. You didn't have to lie to me about. Right. Yeah. The symbol of your love was a lie.

Girls got to eat. Welcome back. Azul's here with this again. Okay, I've taught you something about him. Go for it. I didn't want to make you drive all the way to the west side this morning. He had stayed with a friend of ours. So I volunteered to have her drop him up at my house and I would bring him to you in the studio.

Yeah. And he was so sweet and so wonderful. And I drove him here from my house. And like, I just want to say, I don't know. understand how anybody drives in a car with other people's pets, let alone their children. It was so stressful for me to be in a car with somebody else's like genuinely like precious cargo. Yeah. It's really stressful. I know. Well, I was like, is she going to understand how to put him in a car? No. Did he jump up there? Okay. I already have a list of car questions for you. I didn't know

if you put them in the back seat or on the floor or in the trunk. Not SUV drunk, not like SUV. Like the penalty box. Not a sedan truck, yes, like the penalty box. Well, yeah, so he was this, we're recording farther in advance because of the tour and everything. So we just actually got back from New York, which will feel super dated by this time, this airs. But yes, he was with his friend. She has another dog.

He had a great time. And I just reunited with him here at the studio. And he did not give a fuck. I'm surprised because he was looking around my house like, where is Ashley? I think he just is confused now on what's going on. And I think he also just like sees you and knows I'm nearby. So I think he got really excited to see you. And then he was probably like, she's got to be around.

They're always together. He blew his low and then he was upset. He jumped on me. It was really nice. I just, it was very stressful for me to have him in the car. I kept turning around to make sure he was like, okay. Like I could never have children in my car. I'm not responsible enough for that.

That is kind of a crazy thing. It's just like a drive around with someone else's kid. Yeah, it's crazy. Like my mom used to like carpool and drive other people's kids. and it's like, what if something happened? Well, you know, it's crazy. But, like, I think about it. When I think about driving in cars in our childhood,

I think that we had a Volvo station wagon with that back penalty box that faced the car behind it. Yeah, I was always in that. Okay, that is the literally unsafest thing I can think of in my life. And while I put your kids in the back, first people to die in getting rear-ended,

just smushed up. Okay, and we would just be like, like looking at cars. We'd be, like, flicking off cars. Didn't even know what it meant? It was a fucked up time. I would be in the penalty box with the OJ trial on my car on the way to school. That's how fucked up things like kids listen to also.

This guy murdered his wife brutally. We listened to it every morning on the way school. I would be a small child in the front seat. That's how we rolled back then. Listen to Howard Stern. On the way to, like, choir practice. I should, I still shouldn't be in the front seat. I think legally I'm like one inch too short to be in the front seat of a car, you guys.

Anyway, we turned out all right. Yeah, we're fine. Parents today, they're just... I'm kidding. You're too sensitive these days, okay? Put your kids in the trunk and put on a murder trial and then drive to school. Okay, so let's just do a quick life update. Okay.

Again, sometimes you guys don't know what we're doing because you don't follow us on Instagram. We know some of you don't because the numbers just, they don't lie. But so you... It's like I always want to be like, that was so dated, but some people have no idea what the fuck. They're listening along every week as if it's current. So it's not not current. But we did just get back from New York, and I'm going to the Super Bowl. So I will have gone to the Super Bowl on the 20th.

It's old news at this point. But if anything, I feel like I need to report. I guess I'll just do that next week. This will have been my first Super Bowl. And I'm trying to talk in past tense, but I brought my brother. Hopefully the Eagles won. Hopefully Rihanna was incredible. And it was just something that I was debating.

And then I was like, no, it's just too much with the Phoenix show four days later. which we also will have had at this point. I'm sure that was incredible too. But then I just had a couple drinks. I was out with a guy friend. And he's a good guy friend of mine that's like just the so, like, live life to the fullest type of person. And we just had a couple of margaritas. And he was like, you should just go.

And I was like, you're right. Went home. And I booked all the travel. And then the next day, I bought the tickets and immediately got an email that my FICO score had changed. So it was definitely a large purchase, but I think these are the things I want to spend money on. When you told me you were going to go, you were just having this text, and you were like, I'm going to go to the Super Bowl. And I was like, okay, so she got that advice from that guy.

And I was disappointed in myself that I didn't give you that advice because I start to get really analytical, as you should, when you're going to spend that volume of money, of course. And we were also going to be in Phoenix three days later, four days later. So it's crazy to go there and then back and there and then back. Even that's a quick flight. But I do want to live life with a little more of like, this is a little. a once in a lifetime opportunity. It's not like you go to the Super Bowl every year. It's like the Eagles.

I mean, the Steelers for the Super Bowl, I'd be like, yeah, let me move having an earth for this. I know. I mean, that's the thing. Like, it couldn't have been worse timing. Like, going to the Super Bowl ensures that I'm not in L.A. one weekend the whole month. You know, like, the timing was crazy. I'm playing to Phoenix twice in a week. Like, I'm a commuter to Phoenix.

But my brother, we're so close, and I just, it's like the Eagles and Rihanna. You know, Matt and I share, like, a deep love for Rihanna. Matt looked at me in the middle of an empty restaurant in the middle of lunch and stay was on. He goes, I love a ballad by a strong female artist. She was belting out stay and it was like, it was like weird for the vibe in the restaurant. And the way he said it, it's just, it's nice. He's in touch with his feminine side. I mean, he loves Rihanna. I remember being

like on a vacation with my family. We had done a cruise and I believe we had stopped in Puerto Rico. And we were walking around and Matt and I for the first time heard like coming out of some restaurant or storefront or something take care by Rihanna and Drake for the first time. It stopped us dead in our tracks. We were, like, smoking cigars, I remember. And we were like, what is that? And it was, like, weirdly, we heard it, like, there. And we just, like, stood and we were like, what is the song?

It's the best song ever made. It's going to be really special. I'm, like, I'm jealous. I'm like, so much promo. But, yeah, I'm not going to spend that kind of money list as the Steelers. But it's a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity. And I think it's really nice. And that's been over for a week at this point.

Yeah. Uh-huh. Yeah. But it did also, like, inspire me. We were talking about this at the airport, like, about just, like, doing things, like and making it work for yourself, even if you're, like, not sure if it will. Like, I was telling you about going to London with my family. And, you know, what actually started me traveling in my whole life is my fiance and I had broken

up, I'd never traveled anywhere. And my dad and I were going to go to Europe. And we were like, going to go to, like, London and Ireland and Scotland. It's like my dad's dream. All he's ever wanted to do is, like, go to those places. That's like the trip he wants to take. And like, last minute, he kind of canceled on me. I was just like, I just don't think I can, like swing it.

I don't really want to make it. It's not like we'd book flights or anything. But he was just like, I don't really want to do this trip, because I blame his wife, ex-wife. So he had brought up a couple times now that my brother's moved to London, like, do I want to come with him there in May? And I just kept saying no, because I was just like, I don't think I could fit it in. This is kind of crazy. We've all these shows in May and in June. I just was like, talking to you about it.

And I was like, this is sad to not just go. Yeah. I should prioritize this. This is like this trip that my dad's always wanted to take. And I didn't get to take it with him years ago. I end up going by myself. And I'm going to do it with like him and my brother. It'll be really nice.

I'm going to fit it in. And I think that, you know, my parents are older. My dad's 76. And so we do have a finite amount of time with our parents as they get older. And I'm excited to prioritize this. Because I, you and I work so hard. I've worked my whole life for this. So I'm excited to go do that.

So I'll update you guys. Oh, for sure. I know. I was like, we were looking at the calendar last night. Like, let's figure out how we can do this. But we, you. Let's figure out together. I play my trips with you because I just, you know, I don't ever want you to feel like I've abandoned you professionally.

Well, I think as you get older, you just know what you want to do. do what you don't want to do, and it becomes way easier to say no to stuff that you're like, I'm going to do that thing and look back on it and wish I just stayed in. You kind of can be like, look at something and be like, I won't regret this for the rest of my life if I don't go, but like I know I'll have an amazing time if I do go. So I should just whatever it is. Spend the money if you have it, of course, make the time, take the time off work or whatever. And I think you get to a point where you get invited to something and you're like,

I don't think that's going to be that fun. And I'm going to just like reflect and not have FOMO about something because I think it's so easy to be like, but I should go, something's happening and I should do it. And then you actually get to a point, I feel like in life where you're like, I don't want to do it. Nothing feels better than when I skip something and the people that went told me it was bad.

It's the best feeling that you can ever feel. You made me last so hard in the car yesterday. Because I was like, we did the Salt Lake show, we did the Denver show weeks ago at this point. They were amazing. And then immediately I had to go get up and fly to New York to do the Today show. And I was like, you know what I was thinking?

if we had stayed in Denver for the extra day on Sunday, I would have liked to, like, go skiing, because, like, our video guy is, like, a big snowboarder. And I was, like, wouldn't it be nice if you and I just, like, tried to go skiing? And you're like, oh, I wouldn't know that. That was crazy. You were so out on it.

Well, you said it like, we would have. Like, you were like, if we would have been an extra day in Denver, we would have gone skiing. I was like, we would have? No, we wouldn't have. What are you talking about? Like, the way you usually wouldn't say it like that to me. You would have said, like, remember when we thought we were going to go to Disney World?

That was so crazy. We thought we were going to go to Disney World last time. After we did so many live shows, after we hadn't done live shows for like six months. Well, that brings us to Florida, which is coming up. So we have shows in Miami, Tampa, Orlando. We would love to see you guys. Again, Salt Lake City, we kicked it off the tour there, Snack City tour. Incredible.

So fun. We did at the Comedy Club. So we were like right. We were just so close to you guys in the audience that came. And it was, they were both like such epic shows. We had the best time. And then Denver was incredible. Again, super dated at this point, but just wanted to shout out, we had the Denver Broncos drumline, the Broncos stampede, which were awesome.

We love Denver so much. So many people come with our moms to the show. I can't get over it. So much family. And I really think about it. Like, coming with your mom, like, it's so special to share that. And then at this point, we will have done Phoenix to and had the Arizona Cardinals, cheerleaders. open that, which I'm sure were incredible. So I just wanted to do a few thank yous and tell you guys

that Florida shows are going to be super lit. They always are. And there are still probably at this point some tickets left and you can get those at Girls Gotteeat.com. Yes. And Ashley and I always say this, but we write the shows so that even if you've never listened to the podcast, you will love it. It is wild. Fun. We do giveaways. It's insane. There's crazy stuff that goes on. So if you have friends that have never heard the show, it doesn't matter. They'll love it. So bring them. And that's all I have for that. Okay. And then we just want to announce a couple quick things about Vives Only. Our other company, the vanilla blow gel is back in stock. We have these incredible blow gels. The flavors are the best. We've had passion fruit and vanilla for a long time. Vanilla sold out back in stock so you can grab that,

make your blowjobs even tastier. Wait, I want to read the DM. We've posted this on Vives at this point, but I just am obsessed with this DM that this girl sent to me personally that said, Miss Girl, When all caps is the vanilla blowjob gel coming back into stock, I've guzzled down too many vanilla cum loads to go back to normal flavored cum. That's the most iconic DM I've ever gotten. I've guzzled down too many vanilla cum loads to go back to normal flavored cum. Go all the way off, Miss Girl. Fawallin, you know if the GM starts of Miss Girl, it's going to be good.

Thank you. Thank you, Queen. is. I mean, it's personal preference because people love the mango, the passion fruit crushes and the vanilla. So it's really whatever you're going for. Or it has got new flavors. We're at Soho House with the person who runs a lot of the stuff and vibes. She and Ashley and I

were trying on new flavors and so I was putting them on my fingers. I had flavored blowjub gel just dripping down my fingers and I'm running around so I was trying to like figure out where the napkins were. It was really shameful. And then the other big announcements, we have an incredible feature that we're announcing in tandem with our app and the toys.

We've worked on this for a long time. So it is our long Distance Lover, which will allow you to have somebody control your toys from anywhere that the app is available. So I feel like I've been talking for a long time, so I'll let you talk about this too. It is a paid feature, so I just want to get that out of the way. But if you have any of our vibes, it will work with the app and you simply text to somebody, a link or the code. And if you are in a long distance relationship, if you travel a lot, this is going to be unbelievable. So your partner could be in California controlling your vibrator in New York or France, like all over the place. It's like not just California, New York. You could be in Wichita, Kansas. Thank you for bringing up in the

South of France. Yeah. So it's really easy. Again, you can get into the remote control for free, but this is a premium feature. So this is with the paid subscription, but only one person needs to have that paid subscription. The partner does need to download the app, but just the free version, very quick and easy. Everything's really speedy. They'll just download the app. And you'll go to the remote controller part of the app, you'll go to the bottom navigation where it says vibes, and it's really simple. It's really easy. We have designed screens to walk you through it, but it's so easy. You'll just get this code. You give them the code. You can text to them from the app or you can just tell them that code via text, via if you're on the phone with them or whatever, and that'll last for 10 minutes,

connect really easily, and then they can just play around with their phone, with the patterns, the intensities and everything and control your vibrator. And whatever you want, you can end the session. and if you finished or you want to dump them, just you control that. And then they don't have access to your vibrate anymore. So this isn't something where, like, you know, some guy you broke up with controls your vibrato until the end of time or some girl.

So it's so cool. What a fun way to spice up a long-distance relationship. I can't believe how fast it works. I mean, it was instantaneous. I couldn't believe it. I had somebody in Washington controlling my vibrator when I was in New York, and it just was so cool. So it works everything.

Our favorite way to pair it is the GGBP. candy vibe because you can wear it in your panties and have your partner control it from wherever. Yeah, but it works a little twice. So check it out, Vibsonly.com. That has everything there for you. We can't wait to release new features for you guys, but this is a really fun one right now. Okay, so we want to talk about something that we've gotten a few emails about. I think we can just start with the emails, the two that we got recently and then we can discuss. Okay. So the first one, subject, are we dating the same guy, Facebook groups? Spread the word. She says, Hey ladies, love the pod. Hope you're both loving L.A. so far. I wanted to let you know if you weren't

already aware that there are amazing Facebook groups called Are We Dating the Same Guy for various cities. I live in Chicago, so I'm in the R We Dating the Same Guy Group. It's so great seeing seeing this community of women come together and help each other out with red flags, warnings and advice. The group also serves as a platform for people to post people. They've been talking to ask if anyone is tea on the guys. I've seen heartbreaking revelations like spouses finding out about cheating in this group, all the way to women building up their single guy friends, which I've seen separate groups for vouch dating, verified guys and group matchmaking in Chicago. I just wanted to plug these Facebook groups to make you both aware if you aren't already.

And we just got one came through shortly thereafter. Subject line, have you dated Facebook groups? Hi, ladies, love the show. I've seen Facebook groups popping up where women can post pictures, warnings, and questions about local men who they may have found on dating apps. The group has been an invaluable resource for warnings about men who may be abusive or dangerous, but being a part of these groups is also really pushing me away from wanting to pursue any men. It seems like people so rarely have positive things to say, and so many of the men have

concerning traits. I was curious how you feel about these type of groups and what advice you would give to those who are participating or thinking about participating in them. Thanks. So yes, I'd heard of these for a while now. I never got in them. We're not in them, so we're not breaking any rules. But you're supposed to be kind of like under the radar. Like Fight Club. Yeah. Yeah, like don't talk about Fight Club. But we're going to talk about it. You guys emailed us about it and we're dating shows. So we are going to bring it up. So I think you're supposed to be talking about these on podcasts. But I'm not in the group. So I can do whatever I want. I'm sharing emails we

got. And I think it's important to discuss. Well, first of all, I want to address what she said about like it makes me think that all guys are terrible. And I've talked about them in the show and I've had to do a lot of self-work because you and I get a lot of emails about terrible behavioral, terrible men. We've seen so much of it. And I was starting to hate all men too and think is this all bad. And, you know, my mom says something to me and I keep that in mind now. And I think I've done a lot of work to not feel like that. Because my mom said, just remember the people in happy relationships are not email you. And they don't email you every day about all the wonderful things with all the people in their lives are doing. So it's good to keep that in mind. There's going to be negative behavior from all sexes all the time. This is just, this is a, this is a. This is a. cesspool of it. So if you spend too much time these groups, of course you're going to feel like that. It's not all bad, but I do think it's important that this stuff exists. Yes. Positive across the board to warn any women about abusive guys or anything along those lines. You know, it's funny, I don't know if you ever knew this or got into this, but there was an app when I was in Atlanta, I mean, now probably 10, 8, 10 years ago called Lulu and you could rate guys you dated and like see stuff about them and all my guy friends were always like, what are they saying about me on Lulu? So

people always have had a need for this. Also, you know, I know that there are rules in the group, like no defamation, no accusations, like, and you'll get kicked out and blocked immediately. So I know that it's very like, this is not to like drag people defame them and make claims that may or may not be true. So I don't mean again, I don't know the exact line there, but they do really want to keep this, not just this like disgusting, messy, complaining. And I think it's just like, you know, women helping women should be the point of it. But I also think something to keep in mind because it is sometimes so hard to not think all guys are terrible, not think dating is terrible. You know, sometimes it can feel like back to back.

Friends are dealing with stuff. You're dealing with stuff. And you can really become jaded. And a lot of it is fucking terrible. I was the fellow realtor today, 57 year old woman. She has two children. She's, I guess, divorced and was just like, how do you? It's so bad.

I was like, it's bad. You know, she's like, what are we supposed to do? I'm like, I don't know. But I'm just trying to see this house. So, no, I actually love talking to her, but it was like very funny. Raina, I didn't tell you, she asked me, she goes, so you like being single, I assume? And I was like, what? And she met because you're like wanting to live in L.A.

Like, she kind of made a joke. She's like, oh, you're moving here? So you like being single? And I was like, oh, why? Because I just think no one thinks it's good anywhere. I was like, I will tell you, I think L.A. is probably maybe the second worst city for women to date in, but New York is the first. So at least I'm doing it a little bit better. But no. At least they'll smile while they're rejecting you here.

But you said something when we were discussing this about also just keep in mind the stories that you're hearing that you only have one side of it. And again, something sounds very egregious, terrible for sure. But something that could be perceived as like miscommunication. Like there's just two sides. Every story. Or just bad behavior. I mean, there is one particular thing I can think that I've done to my most recent acts. It was like really not nice. And I didn't cheat on him or anything. But like it's something I'm really not proud of. It's behavior. I will say was gross and not nice and over the line. And I have apologized for it. I wouldn't do it again. But he could post about it in a group like that. And people would be like, fuck her. Even though it's a one-time thing, it's not indicative of my character. It's just, it was a mistake, you know?

And if somebody read that, they would be like, fuck this girl. But yeah, you don't know what goes on on both sides of it. And I will say the stuff I said wasn't wrong. It's just the way that I chose to disseminate that information was not very kind. So right. And that's always something to keep in mind with anything of like put yourself on the other side of it. Think of something shitty you've done because of whatever the circumstances were. And if it ended up in one of these Facebook groups, would you look like a shitty person? Yeah, I think we all have a story like that. So I think that the thing is that like there's more people that come forward and are like this happened to me too. I mean, this is giving like West Elm Caleb. I feel like this popped up like after that. I don't know. Don't quote me on that. But obviously West Elm Caleb was a thing where all these women kind of filed on and all had the same type of story. But ultimately, anytime someone tells you somebody is abusive in any way, obviously you're going to steer clear. But some of the other things, you've got to make that decision for yourself. But at the end of the day, we think groups like

this are valuable. Yeah. And the extreme cheating. And like the, I have a friend who was dating somebody long term. He was cheating on her with multiple women. She found him in this Facebook group. She had already known that he had done this. So they had already broken up. Yeah. She was like, let me just see if he's in this group and he was and multiple women were like, I'm dating this guy, he cheated on me, blah, blah, blah, blah. The other girls were like, I'm dating him too. So like that kind of stuff, I don't, there's no excuse for it. And like, thank God these kind of groups exist for something like that.

I think she thought he was like such a nice guy and he loved her and that they were solid. And like it's one of those things. I do want to, I'm dying to an episode on like palological lying. But people, you just sort of like tug on the thread a little bit. And then it's like, oh my God, that wasn't true. So that's not true. So that's not true. it is the worst feeling when the house of cards comes down.

So that's what these groups I think are good for. Yeah, I think that some of you are probably listening. Like, oh my gosh, I have a horror story to share or some crazy story to share. Like, feel free to email us. Like, I'm happy to go into this deeper. Again, I'm really not trying to get anybody in trouble. Like, of course, we would never share personal information. But again, I feel like this is like the first role of, are we dating the same guy

Facebook groups is don't talk about are we dating the same guy Facebook? But whatever. We're not in the group. Not in the group. I'm trying to steer clear because I think it's important to discuss, like I already said. But yeah, let us know. It's heartbreaking. I mean, you find out in crazy ways sometimes that you are being cheated on or your friend is being cheated on or whatever it is.

I mean, we had a girl one time when we used to do live bumble at a show that her boyfriend came up on the bumble. And it was like recent, recent photos. And they were about to move in together. And it was heartbreaking. You know, it's terrible behavior to cheat and be disloyal in the first place, but to do it so publicly. And I don't know. At the end of the day, also I think that like a lot of these things, make people behave better.

You know, like a city in New York, I looked at the New York one has like 85,000 people. Like, that's probably the most. Like, New York is the place we've always said where you can just act like garbage and it'll never come back to you. Like, you're in a smaller town. Some people always act like garbage

and treat you poorly and ghost you and do these things. But in smaller towns or smaller cities, you usually have people in common, usually behave a little bit better if you know that it can be outed more. know you more. Like in New York, you can be so anonymous and you can behave so badly. So I don't know. I have mixed feelings on sometimes like a pile on situation, but I'm also like if these things hold people, mostly guys accountable, I'm for it. I'm for it too. These things feel so bad when you

find out about them, but in the long run, the sooner the better. And I have had my first boyfriend I lived with in New York was cheating on me with everything that moved. And I wish that something like this existed because he hid in every corner of New York City for me. You can take people to restaurants everywhere and you can lie about whatever you're doing. Some people tell you they don't want to have a social media presence and they can hide that they have a girlfriend. There's so many ways to just like act like you're not in a relationship. So I like that these things exist. Yeah. And if you're in a relationship that is open or, you know, non-monogamous and you both agreed to it. And then, not you're not saying? Yeah, don't get in there. Obviously you don't want to be

in there. And if you're in a relationship where you kind of like a donut, mask, don't tell policy, and you're like, my partner might be cheating, but listen, you know, I'm, I got this jewelry and we're going on these trips and like, I don't care. Like, don't go in these groups. Who cares? Live your truth. I don't care. There's a million arrangements.

I mean, I don't do whatever you want. Okay, so we are going to bring our guests in very shortly. Lauren and Jeremy, we're so excited. We didn't mention that before. We can't wait to talk to them. All right, guys, we are so excited to welcome our guests today. We've been on their show. We are so excited to welcome them on to our.

She is a YouTuber with almost 9 million followers on her channel, LAR DIY. And they together co-host the podcast Wild Soul 9. Please welcome to the show, Lauren, Ria Maki, and Jeremy Lewis. You nailed it. The Ria Maki, you nailed it. That was so good. A clap track in my head after that one. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Thank you so much, you guys. We're so, we had so much fun on your show. Oh, my gosh. We just laughed for hours. It was really good. We're so amped to have you on our show. Do you have some updates you've gotten engaged since? New Dog.

I'm more concerned with that. I feel like that's so nice. You got engaged. That's great. We'll talk about that later on the second half of the show. Literally, no, it's funny.

Well, I don't know. We would, like, message you with Jeremy about, like, coming to L.A. and you would, like,

said you were going to propose. Yeah. Like, you guys knew. We know. Yeah, we know. He said, hopefully by the time you come,

she'll have a ring on her figure. And we're like, what? I was like, I feel like I shouldn't know this. No. We're not even that close. It was really,

it was, I was towards the last two weeks, all right, now it can be slightly more... Chaotic. Flippant with this information. We'll see how it goes. But we're perfect people to tell. Exactly.

Like, we're not going to be around her. It's like, you know, until now. You don't have to, like, lie to me about it. Right. It's when you devolge your life story to the person in the plane next to you. Yeah. Knowing you'll never see them.

Yes. Like, my friend once, she found out the gender of her baby. And like, she basically just told, like, a server one time. She was like, I have to get this off my chest. I tell someone. And, like, told the server in cheesecake factory. this deep dark secret. You know, so.

If you're going to talk to your server as a cheesecake factory. But it's weird to like know this and then we were just like waiting like on a Instagram. And then when we saw it, we were like, oh, we knew. It also was very casual. He sent us the nicest DM and he was like, if you guys want recommendations for like tailors or manicurists, also by the time you get her, maybe she'll have a ring on her figure. I was like, wait, wait, zero to 100. It's a lot.

I was like, a manicure is. Okay, she's also getting a ring. One. Yeah. The priorities. Also, you know, like, you move to like a new city and you know nothing? Yeah. You know how long, like how many bad haircuts I got?

How many, and you just sit there and go, okay, well, this is another couple of weeks looking like this. It's just like an awkward phase of just trying to like figure out what this? Totally. So if you two want hair like Jeremy, it's good hair. He'll send you straight to Rodante. Yeah. I just got here. I just came from Roedontade.

Rodonte. Rodante? He's from the Philippines. His name is definitely not Redonte. Okay. I have to ask you a serious question. Okay. On days when Jeremy gets a haircut, is that his whole day?

Is it like that's all he can handle it a day? Or can he multitask more? He can, so what's annoying is that it doesn't, like, it makes me so angry. I have so much hair sewed into my head. And he just has so much that just lives there naturally. So annoying. I feel you. I have 17 tracks in my hair right now.

100%. I've got two layers sewed to my head right now. And it just kind of does that. Like, I remember the first time, like, we slept together and like, not even like having sex. But like, waking up next week. and I looked at. I'm like, your fucking hair just looks like that

when you wake up. Are you kidding me? Me, my extensions are like in a ball next to the bed. I've stuffed them under the mattress so no one pulls them out on sucking their dick. My favorite has been like you see like an extension in a purse. Like someone just tucked it in there. That was my look.

Like a little track hanging out of my purse. Exactly. Or the console in my old cars where they all used to live. That's really funny. I don't even know if we've ever talked about in our podcast, but we talked about with busy Phillips, how like when guys have a haircut, that's their whole day.

and they're so stressed because they're just bad at multitasking. And it's just like my ex and my friend with her husband, she's like, if it's a haircut, it's just like that's all you hear about. It's just like it seems like it's so much. But you seem like you got your shit together. He's not like 12 and a half days. Not a day over, not a day under on the dot.

You are a very well manicured man. But like that's like the one thing that keeps me looking well manicured because the moment it's like day 16, I look disheveled. Wait, what were you like during quarantine? Oh my God. We almost had to wake up. That was almost. had to break up because I had to cut his hair

and it grows so fast. You cut it? She's large DIY. You have no idea. You're right. I didn't even a bathroom. She made a video out of it. She monetized it.

We monetized it. Absolutely. I'm sorry I missed this. Yeah. She monetized. No, no. It was, because I mean, like, you see, like, how good the hair is. And, like, I feel like for a lot of guys, like, they don't have accessories.

Like, I've got lash extensions. I've got nails. Totally. Like, hair extensions. And it's like, Jeremy's got a hair. I don't even know what you look like, to be honest. Like, literal, like an asshole. Like an actual asshole

Put out all of the things So it's like he's got his hair And so in quarantine when I had to cut it And like learn how to use Like the shaver and like the different Yes the different guards Yeah We're like oh my god

This is the end of the relationship Stressful We face time is my guy That I've gone to like nine years now And yeah And like he was like looking at Lauren Like ah Yeah that's pretty good

That is crazy Did you finally find out What she looked like during quarantine? Oh it's one of those things Where it's like with no lash extension When they like finally all fell off He was like, you look tired. It's one of those is up.

Every straight man's first mistake with a girl. I mean, I... Like, wow, you look different. I don't know if I would agree with that. I don't have a better reference. I don't know if you would say that again. I wouldn't say it again. I know that for a fact.

That's part of it. If I don't have a mascara on or whatever, I'm just like, I look tired. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, no, no. So you'd never look tired. Yeah. No, no, we know. That's every three weeks with Angel.

We don't look tired anymore. With Angel? With Angel. Got it. Yeah. I used one of her Dante. Oh, yeah.

Lauren has like a roster of people that come to the house too. Like, she wouldn't have to leave for a massage to get her hair done, to get her nails done, to get her lashes done. That was a COVID thing, though, because it didn't used to be like that,

but then I feel like a lot of people went kind of like solo and started doing house calls. And I was like, this is great. Like more money into your pocket. You come to my house. This is great. You guys are so ally.

I love it. Is that very all I do you think? Um, I think we also have more real estate in our house. We're like, When I lived in Toronto, I would never have space for, like, a masseuse to bring their table into, like, my living room. My living room was my kitchen when I lived in Toronto. So it's like, that wasn't an option.

But, like, in L.A., we have room for that. That's why I'm offering it up via DMs. I'm like, are we getting engaged? I've got Lash people. Yeah, I've got nail people. We've got extension people. What do you need? Did you have a fresh man for the engagement?

Oh, my God. So there was a whole moment of spiral because a week and a half before the proposal happened. He texted me while I was away with a few girlfriends. and was like, hey, for your Christmas present, we're going to go and do, like, a little weekend trip, which, like, didn't raise any red flags or alarms because, like, we sometimes will just do, like, a cute little experience instead of exchanging gifts for Christmas. So, like, that was fine. But then in the same hour, my nail girl texted me to reschedule our appointment to be the day before we would leave for that trip.

And so I started fucking spiraling in, like, a good way. Just took you off. Well, I was like, I was like, oh, my God. Like, maybe it's happening. Like, maybe, like, maybe this, like, one plus one equals two here, maybe. maybe. But one of the girls that we were with knew and was able to like completely just like throw me out the scent, texted Jeremy behind my back, obviously, and it was like, you need to like shut this down. He was like, you know what? Your parents are flying in for Christmas the next day. Like,

let's just not do it. We'll do it. Maybe in January. And so I was like, oh my God. That was exhausting spiraling that whole time for nothing. Like, I'm going to do it. No, with every single thing that I went out of my way to try and like fix, I had to double the gaslight. Okay. Now she thinks there's going to I have no idea. I have to up the emotional distress to make her feel like she's an idiot but she could possibly be getting engaged. Wait, that happened to me too. So I kept asking my ex-fiancee to like propose to me.

And the day that. Let's start the clue here. I got engaged. I went on his computer and I saw engagement ring websites. And I like, Rana. What? What are you going? Okay, no, no.

But you should just say that this happened because this is what happened to me. There was an ad. There was an ad that showed up on the bottom. Retargeting does you dirty. Yeah, retargeting. A year ago to be getting retargeted. Instagram didn't even. Oh, you were just spying on him?

Yeah, I was just spying on it. She was like, he's probably fucking, he's probably rings. No, he never, he was like such a nice guy. I probably just borrowed his computer for a second. And this wedding ring website popped up and I was like, okay, I have to have a conversation because I don't want to get engaged right now. So I had this, I had to like let him down and be like,

I don't want to marry you. I don't want to get married right now. I love you. I want to live with you, whatever. So we did all that. It was a year and a half into the relationship, but it was too soon, you guys. Okay. But how old were you?

I was 26 or 27 at the time. Okay. So a year later, I wanted to, like, give him positive and reinforce it that I was ready to start getting engaged. And I wanted him to know that, like, now's the time to spend the money and get the ring, get the ring, get the ring. And so I kept bringing it up. And then he, like, freaked out on me one day. And he was like, you just stop fucking asking me about this and let me do this in my own time. And then he proposed to me that night.

That night. So you think that he had it planned for, like, multiple weeks leading up to that? Yeah, he definitely did. I mean, it probably took him, like, a really long time to say it, but the $500 he probably spent on that piece of shit, right. Oh, we didn't insure it. Well, didn't you? You got it appraised and you were like, oh, this is awkward.

Well, I kept asking him to come with me to get it insured and he kept like, he kept like pushing it off and I kept being like, this is weird. Okay. Guys that don't buy insurance with the ring, big red flag. Yeah. If he had just said to me, I want to save money for a home or whatever, we don't have the money for this, I would have been like, no problem. Right.

Yeah. Like, buy me a piece of glass. I don't care. And then you can upgrade later if you want to, like, whatever. Yeah, that's a big deal. But he lied to me about it. That's what was weird. So then when, yeah, when we broke up and I went to sell it,

you're like sick, $14. Yeah, this guy, they laughed me out of the jewelry store. They were like, I can't believe that this guy was like, you know this is fake, right? This bum proposed to you this. Like they were laughing at me so hard as the diamond. Which is mortifying. That's mortified.

But also it's like almost the fuel you need to seal that. Yeah. That's the NILA often, for sure. Yeah. Yeah. So the thing that we were going to like start our life together with was a complete fucking line. Right. Totally.

You don't have to lie to me about. Right, yeah, the symbol of your love was a lie. It's funny to snoop, and I want to talk to you guys about this too, because you live together, your tech is out, you know, like, I remember one time I looked at a guy I was dating and I wasn't snooping. I was on his computer and his eye message was up, and I saw that he was like trying to plan this getaway for us, and he was asking a friend, and then he never planned it.

So I was just, it was weird to like, wait, what? I'd feel like I couldn't circle back because I saw it. And then I just kept being like, are we going to go on that vacation? Ashley, that is crazy. And then we never did. Oh my God, no, that's heartbreaking, though, because you'd be like, okay, how can I, like, pitch this to be like, it'd be really nice to go to, like, Aspen, though.

It wouldn't have been that. It would have been the driving distance, a little road trip. But still, it's like, did I do something wrong? What changed? This was a plan. Right, because you can ask questions. Yeah. Yeah.

So what's your policy with, like, phones, tablets, like, you guys seem very, like, trustworthy and stuff. But it's like, are you ever tempted because it's, like, out? Like, are you just share everything? We have too much in common to not share everything. Of course. Right. You work together or live together. Is anything private? No. It would be difficult for it to be, like, it would be more of, we would have to have a conversation about, okay, these three channels, you can't access. Right. What's private is, I don't think she knows how to get into half of my two FAA. Yeah. Well, because like of his old job at, like, working in crypto shit, like there's, you have to have like your thumb on something and also something plugged in while also like reciting like 14 specific words. Oh, like a VPN. Yeah.

But even like biometric and something else. But if you ever wanted to hack into that, there's some really titillating information. I'm sure it'd be sick. Yeah, trade secret. Super exciting. Big trade secrets. But you guys can get in each other's Instagram accounts if you, like, want to. Yeah, email.

Probably. If you can get into the laptop, you can get into the email. Right. Okay. Let's talk about it. Yeah. What do you want to know? Did you come into the relationship, both of you being trustworthy people already?

Or do you feel like you are securely attached with each other and that bred more like trust? I wasn't trust. Jeremy cannot stop shaking his head. I was like, damn. Or do you mean trustworthy or trusting? Trusting, sorry. I mean, like, did you come into the relationship? As a person, are you trustworthy?

Jeremy also said no. No. No, but like my trust is like earned and then you can have it. But like, unless I feel like you deserve the trust, you're not getting it. Okay, so before I like you, I don't like you. Oh my God, I'm so naive. I'm the other way around. Like, you have my trust and I love you until something goes wrong.

And then you lose it. Yeah. That's a terrible terrible. Yeah, terrible. I've also gotten through life in like a pretty solid way. Like that's really worked out for me. It's worked for you. I'm really lucky I've never been cheated on.

I've never like had issues with like going through phones and stuff like that. So like I have no reason to. That must be nice. But yeah. It's really worked out for me okay. Did you have like a bunch of like serious relationships prior to this? Oh, I'm a violent serial dater. Like serial dater like not long term relationships or is that what you mean?

Like accidental long term relationships that are all back to back. Okay. Okay, so not a lot of time in between. Not a lot of time between. How many days have you been single and had a driver's license? About 12. Got it. Yeah.

I can't relate at all. That's how many days I've been not single. I'm kidding. And like, I don't mean to do it. Like, after my last relationship, like, we broke up and I was like, I'm about to be a ho. I'm about to fuck everyone in L.A. Because I hadn't been, I moved to L.A. in a relationship. So I was like, oh, my God.

Like, it's time. Like, I'm ready. Because I'd never really had, like, a really intense hoe phase. And then Jeremy Smith. think was my fourth date maybe. And here we are. So you really haven't had a ho face. I really haven't.

There's still time. There's still time. There's still time. Okay, so four dates, you meet Jeremy. Did Jeremy, did you have a hoaxe? Did he have a whole face? Yeah, I think Lauren's my third or four days. You know what I want so bad?

I wish that I could just have every girl in one room in L.A. That Jeremy has ever slept with. I mean, are there tons? I love how many. This is wild. She's like he's seen 100 vaginas. Wait, I love this though. I mean, this is our good friends that are married.

He always talks about her ho-faced. I think he's proud that she could have fucked like the whole world and picked him. That's what he brings it up. It's really complimentary. I don't understand dudes who want to be in a relationship with someone who's desirable and then gets mad that they're desirable. Right. Yeah. If that's the case, go fuck the paint wall.

I don't understand. I don't understand where that changes. Not that in a relationship, I don't want you to be desirable anymore. Uh-huh. Or have a past before me. Right. Isn't it nice to have somebody that, like, has all this experience? Yeah, I don't want the toothy head.

Oh, my God. If he's looked at every single girl in L.A. And I won? Like, I'm a competitive individual. I won. Yeah. It's probably some, like, purity, dumb bullshit where, like, you... It's like, you want that, they want that, like, virginal woman that everybody has wanted her,

but she's staged, saved herself for him. Yeah, if your entire, like, personality is, like, revolving around Andrew Tate, I would understand. I was going to say that's very Andrew Tate. Yeah. Yeah. It's giving Andrew Tate. Yeah. But like going back to my trust thing, if I don't feel like I can trust you and also trust you in the sense of like what you bring in the relationship, but also what I can give you, which is my honest path.

And that actually resonates. Like I'm just not interested in it. Okay. Like if I couldn't have been honest with her about me. Being a ho. Yeah. It would feel like everything else is a lie to if that makes any sense. It does.

And I think isn't it so nice to know that your partner could have been with so many people? I mean, you're both really attractive people. Isn't it really nice and wonderful and smart and all the things? But isn't it nice to know that they could have anybody? Yeah, I'd fuck you both. And it's nice to know that like they could fuck anybody and they chose you. They could do anybody and they chose you. It's really special.

Well, it's also part of your story. Like you guys are, you have a podcast. Like you're in the public. Like it'd be weird if that was who you were and then she didn't know and you were trying to hide it. It's like, I'm never going to pretend I wasn't like a huge slot. Like that'd be everybody knows. It's like, you know.

I think that also like causes problems down the road to if you're dating for like eight months a year. or whatever, and old shit in your past comes out that you feel like that person hid from you, like, that would make me feel so uneasy. Like, I'd rather just go into it with, like, a totally open book, clean slate. Especially when, like, you weren't honest with somebody and they look stupid in a room because they didn't have the information that everybody else had. Right, right, right, right.

That would be, like, a big problem for me. Yeah. I have a question. If you were, like, going to a party and your significant other had dated somebody casually for, like, two months, would you want to know that that person was in the room? Not serious relationship. It's been over forever. Never going to happen again.

I wouldn't be able to go into many rooms. You would be able to leap. Jeremy, how much fucking are you doing? Well, like, as you can relate to, when you get out of it, like, being engaged, it's like free for all. Because you were engaged. Yeah.

Okay. To somebody else. And this was the first time, like, when I became single with the first time and I had a real job, was crazy. Right, so you could afford to take a girl on a date? It wasn't like, mom,

you drop me off of the movie theater. Yeah, you had the funds. Yeah. It was like a playground. And you're tall. That helps. And also there's like six straight guys in L.A. It's so true.

Stop it. He's got a full head of hair. And three of them have insurance. Yeah. How did you find him? That's what I'm saying. Fourth date? I was like, oh my God.

But like three dating apps and we already knew each other. It had our phone numbers. Like we already knew each other and still had to use three dating apps. Okay. Can we tell the origin story? Yeah. We talked about it a little bit on when we recorded with you guys and then I wanted to make a note to like share it in full because it was like wild till nine. It was like all over the place.

Go ahead. Go ahead. Go ahead. All right. Well, I'll start. You thought I was gay. And you go ahead from there? 100%.

So we, We worked together-ish at the beginning, but he was engaged. He said something about, like, fiancé. And my assistant and I were like, oh, shit, I thought he was gay. Like, he said something about like her. And because we also knew that he could sing really well. And so, I don't know. What?

Let's stay on track. I have an incredible video to send you after he read this recording. What about just do something right in? We're saying on track. You want to bust out of track? We could. I'm going, he sounds like a Disney Prince. Like, so you pair that with like...

Who would have imagined that I was... You're supposed to jump in now. Yeah. This is where your karaoke part takes over. He's not offered to send us a manicurist art place. See? That's what I'm saying. It's like you have like a well-groomed man who also like did drama and like sings

and has health insurance. Okay. And like like has a stable job. But then he's like, oh, I have a fiance and it's a woman. I was like, oh, shit. And I was like, he's great. I don't think I said I have a fiance and she's a woman. No, you said she.

I'm just going to like, I think you guys found that information. We connected the dots eventually. Yeah. You were like, yeah. We connected the dots. And she's a woman. Right. Anyways, if you find yourself,

say I have a fiance, if she's a woman, you're gay. Yeah, let's be clear. You're fishing. Me, yeah. How did it, how did it, how did it land? So we landed on the sexuality. Great, whatever.

I was in another relationship. So their engagement are called up, I think, probably like a year before I got out of my relationship. But regardless, that's what Jeremy was doing his hoe things. Like doing the whole things. Doing your whole things. And when I got out of my relationship, and eventually was like, okay, like, I'm ready to, like, download the apps, ready to do my ho-phase, like, and start going on days with people that I, like, maybe kind of know or have, like, a mutual friend with, just so, like, I don't get killed on, like, my first week going out on dates.

Yeah, say that for two or three, right? Say that for two or three. So he saw me on Raya when I got on the apps, DM'd me on Instagram, but I didn't see the message. It, like, went filtered into another folder. It never got opened. I didn't, I didn't, I didn't, it would, it never had the little scene mark. No, I get it yet. I wish we could.

I wish we could. I wish we could. And then I saw him on Hinge and message him on Hinge. Yes. But I was like out drunk as fuck at the time when I got that message. And it like went from like hey to next Tuesday at 7 p.m. And like a very aggressive and short amount of time. Okay.

Like no game. Yeah. None whatsoever. But also she she opened up with this fucking one liner. This is so embarrassing. Oh my God. Oh my God. Let's set the time.

What? I told you. Before we start recording. I know really. Hey, dude, what's up? Yeah. Hey, friend. Yeah.

Wait, stop what I'm saying? So you. That's how little, that's how little a door, by the way, a guy needs before he goes. Have he liked you on Hinge? And so you, had he already liked you on Hinge? Then you matched me. No, she made the first move on Hinge. No, but, wait, I forget how this works, though, because you would have had to already swipe on me to say yes, right?

And then once we connected, I could have messaged. I messaged. Oh, God, who did a Hibon. You saw him did a hey friend, which obviously just knocked a sock off. We have to dive into this. So to me, hey friend is what I would say to a friend of mine who I'm like, ha, ha, ha, hi, see you on Hinge. We're not going to date.

Right. I remember seeing a guy friend of mine where I just like, we like matched on Hinge to be like funny. Right. And he was like, hey, let me know what you think of my profile on here. Uh-huh. You know, like, hey friend. Like, let me.

I say, hey friend, I'm being very purposeful that you're just my friend. So that wasn't what you were thinking. Oh, no, I just had no idea. I didn't know what I was doing. You're like, you said you're awkward when people hit on you. Oh my God. Yeah. She goes, any adjective that she goes, hey, once again, it takes this much of an opening for a guy to be like, I'm in.

Right. But you, friend wasn't. I mean, I saw that. I go, weird. But like, and then, and then it's on. But maybe like she's cute enough for it to be weird and okay. I'll see it through. It was a moment of hesitation and then, yeah, we'll see how goes.

Okay. Okay. I have a question for you guys because you brought up. I would like to hear both of your takes on because you said everybody thinks you're gay or you said you thought he was gay. Is that weird for you or do you feel like who fucking care of? That would have been weird for me in, like, high school when I was like, no, I like women. Like, no, no way. But then it's like, well, when you, like, wear jeans that could have some more room in them and you get your hair like this and you do sing, you're going to be confused sometimes.

It's not like the end of the world. Also, let's be clear, you're not confused. Other people are confused. Yeah, but like, right. You never know. It's like it's not like the first decade where people have been like, well, he sings. So obviously he likes dudes. Right.

At a certain point, it's like, okay. Like, sure. Fine. Whatever it is that you think. And you just were like, he's not gay. I don't care. Like, he seems a little feminine. He sings. But he fucks me like he's not gay. Well, no, no, no. As soon as I just like, I just like assumed after I saw, I think, a video on YouTube singing. I don't know. I just like associated it with, which is totally

inaccurate. I mean, we all do this. And it's also, it doesn't matter, like, whatever. Like, whatever. Like, people could be by or fluid or whatever they got going on. But like, I think guys are just evolving for the better. quite honestly. Oh my God, so masculine. Like, like, I've been in situations.

We know somebody. I'm not gonna say him by name where I was like, sure he was gay. Like certain in my, I was like, there's no way he's not. Right.

And he's not, Rayna's fucked him. I mean, it's just like it's, like, can confirm. Like, and I went out with a guy

who was just, you know, his nails were painted. Like, but he was super confident. You're a straight guy. Yeah, but it's,

competent and sexuality. Like, yeah. I feel like it used to be like, we weren't into that. you wanted this more masculine thing, and now it's just like, I feel like it's changed. Oh, but it's 100% change. I told you this the other day.

I feel like I gravitate, I've always gravitated towards people that have a little more feminine energy. Not men that are extremely feminine, but men that are like flamboyant. Yeah, but men that are a little more like emotional, like that the really alpha male is like, just not what I'm attracted to. It's out. And being out. I was raised by a single mom.

So like, I didn't have a ton of just like overwhelming. Like, like the idea of a fart joke still isn't funny to me. And I know that's like the most foreign thing to say to dudes. Like, that's fucking funny, dude. Like, I farted and we all laughed about it. It's not, though. And there was always just that, like, just general cultural shift I felt there. And so that with, like, now showering and get a haircut somewhat often.

Could he be gay? We don't know. Right. And you're like, I'm not gay. And I don't care. Well, I think she, like, noticed, like, the things that, like, I do that are, like, recklessly and, like, annoyingly straight. Like, the-blowing and shower.

Like, have you ever watched a straight guy put chapsic on? Like, it's the most crazy. It's crazy. It's crazy. It's literally unhinged. It is literally unhinged. Like, you could determine someone's sexuality.

Just bitch on how they put, you fist the whole chapstick. Depends? It's the fist and the duck lips just like not knowing where the, it's hilarious. Is that the litmus test? It's the litmus test, exactly.

But then if they put it on like, very like gloss, you'd be like, I don't know what we really want. But they mad, they all mash their, you're all envisioning it. They mash their lips up so hard

and they fist the chest for a crayon. Yes. That's like a girl. That's exactly what it is. I didn't come here to be attacked. No, I don't think we're talking about you. I don't know.

No, no, we are. We are. We really, really are. Oh, he puts it on like a straight guy. Oh, yeah. Okay. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. No, well, there was never a quite, like, once we went on a first day and, like, even had just more than one conversation outside of work, there was like, no world where I was like, maybe he's even by or maybe he's gay.

Like, like, there was no world where that was like, even an option, I think in my mind, like, based on your personality. We did. Yeah. But that was. That was settled a bit. Yeah. It was after Halloween. It was a long party.

It was a good snack. That sounds dope as hell. Yeah. You were in the middle of penetrative set. Yeah, but then like the doorbell rang and it was like. Postmates had delivered. Right. Okay.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You didn't look down at him and say like what I'd really like inside of me as a cheeseburger. Right. Your dick is great. Thank you so much. But I would like to pause this. We were still here. Yeah.

How long did you guys wait until you had sex for the first time? Three dates? One day longer than she wanted to. Wait, you wouldn't have sex with her? It was a. I was down her. I think. Oh my gosh.

Totally. I've been there. It was like, are we going to do this? It was like, I want to wait. I was like, what? For what? Jesus? What are we waiting for?

Do you feel like? Wait. I had a guy that didn't want to have sex with me. And I was like, wait. He was like, I want to wait. I was like, for why? I was listening to you guys last night. And I have to hear a little bit more about when like you don't get made out with at the time when you want to get made out with.

And you just because she throws like visual just deuses at something. and walks away. Listen, it's kind of her move. That's my move. I love that. No, not getting made out with this is not her move. I'm such a bad bitch. We're supposed to make out.

Five. It has happened like twice, which is probably two times too many, but like literally the same exact scenario where I planned on a makeout and I didn't get it. And I was just like, bye. I was the same guy. Oh, no, wasn't. There's two men out there in the world with that experience. What was in New York and what was in?

Yeah. Well, no. too. And like, I think I can count on one hand a amount of times. I'm like, maybe we'll just hold off for like one more day. Wait, so why did you want to wait? Just, you were really into her? Yeah, it was like, I know myself enough to know that I wanted another date. Okay. So, but like, that was the thought process. I like talking about this because I was in a situation. And this was a person that like, we dated long term, fell super in love. I mean, so it wasn't this like, he didn't want to fuck me. You know, he was like going down to me like over and over. And then like, I'd be like,

cookie paint. Like, I was like, this is kind of awesome. But then I was ready to have sex, and he wanted to wait a little longer. And I think it was just like, I think there was nerves, for one. Right. I think he really liked me. And then he just was like, what's the rush? You know, I was like, okay.

But, like, eventually you just got to stop, like eating my pussy and leaving. Like, I'd like to make this official. Yeah, that's a lot. But it was all positive. Like, it wasn't rooted in some, like. Right. Like, it wasn't, like, sucks. They don't want to.

Yeah. Right. That's why I kind of like having a, had a slut phase. I'm not in a rush. I've had tons of sex in my life. I can go on a couple dates with somebody and figure out if I actually like them or see where this is going

before I need you to fuck me. Also, I'll fuck on a first date. I'll do whatever I want to, but I'll do whatever I want to. I feel like it's almost nice to have a past because you're not like, I gotta fuck everything. Okay, even not having a hoe phase though,

like I'm not, I don't hold sex like on this crazy pedestal. And like, if people want to like have that as a very, very special and like sacred thing, like I totally like do what you want to do and live your life. But, like, for me, like, I'm just really casual about it. Like, even though I haven't slept with half of L.A. Weird.

I felt meaner than I needed to do about your story. I'm just, like, very casual. Just be very casual about it. Like, it just, I don't know. It's not that crazy to me. Yeah. Yeah. But also, it's like whatever you want to do.

Totally. Whatever you want to do. My only thing is just be consistent enough with the people around you. So, like, they don't have to, like, guess where your head's at that day. It's like, and you can change your mind and just be like, you know, communicate. Communicate it. Yes. Because then you can be left feeling like rejecting.

or confused or like what just happened. We want to talk to you guys about you work together. Not all the time. I mean, you have your own thing. You have your own thing. But in some capacity, you work together, you live together, you play together. Like, how do you make it work? Is it a lot?

Like, are you open about needing time and space apart? Or do you want to be together every second? Like, how does the relationship work when it's a lot of doing stuff together? I can't believe I'm going to say this because that's the most fake thing. We have yet to fight about business once. Okay. Great. But the only rule we had before we started the business was

if the business gets in the way of our relationship, the business is over that day. Yep. Yeah. And of course, that's a lot easier said than done. And maybe when we have our first five, that'll be it.

But, like, fortunately, the things that I'm really good at, she's not. And things I'm terrible at, she's great at. I think that's, like, like,

the magic of making it work is that we're not fighting over, like, who plays leader on certain things, which ends up not only being, I think, beneficial in terms of, like, building a business, but also, like,

no one's trying to fight to be like the pilot of something. Right. And also I think just like we were talking about this not that long ago. Not every couple should start a business together. And that's like the understatement of the century. I think most couples would would fail miserably. And also I think there's also a big piece where it's like if you need that business to be successful and that's your one and only venture that could be scary. That's the big part of it too. Right. Right. This is like this is neither like yeah exactly. The podcast is something that we started like for fun and like it ended up being successful and is profitable, like great, amazing. But like that wasn't the goal going into it. Like that's neither of our bread and butter in terms of making revenue.

And if we had a kid in a roof that like depended on this podcast being successful. Right. That adds just like so much like more tension and pressure. Exactly. Exactly. I like the way that you guys say that though. Like is this person professionally somebody that complements my skill set? Like are we both going to be infighting about the exact same thing? If Ashley and I were both like, I need final cut on the editing, I don't know what we're, I mean, Ashley edits the podcast. That would be insane. I don't send her. It never would have gotten. month one.

Raina doesn't listen. It just goes out of the world. And she's lucky that I know what should be cut. But you need one of those. I'm kidding. I'm five years in. I'm pretty, I know for sure.

But like if I was sitting there being like, do this, do this, do this, I'm trying to micromanage like her being able to do her job. Like it would be a bottleneck that was like unbearable. Yeah. You know. But you guys also like the dynamic that I, and I hope I don't offend you,

I feel like this is not what you guys have. Where it's like someone is someone's boss and I don't know. Oh, that's fucking weird. Yeah. When you see, so this happens a lot. Like, in the YouTuber community, there's, like, a ton of lifestyle girlies that get really successful. And they hire, like, their boyfriends or their husbands.

And they are kind of, like, the employee. And especially when it's not the husband and, like, finances are already, like, not joined anyway. I'm always so curious to understand, like, the logistics and the financials behind it. Because, like, is he on salary? Is he paid hourly? Right. Like, what, because because a lot of times I get it.

Because they're like, okay, I'm making a ton of money. I'm traveling, I'm doing fun things. I work from home and I want my boyfriend to be there with me as well too. I totally get that. But then like the next step of that is them quitting their regular 9 to 5 and becoming your film guy slash assistant? Like it's all fucking so weird and I'm so good. I never had to navigate that.

But I mean, I totally get it from the woman's perspective in the sense of I would never be able to get someone who cares as much as, I mean, ideally as you would and work with me and that I would be able to trust and do all this stuff. Totally. But then it becomes this weird dynamic overnight. Right. Or you think of like the only fan's girls who would so much rather have like their boyfriend or significant other take their photos.

That's so much more comfortable. Totally. And they can make 10 times as much versus like hiring a random dude photographer who's like going to be creepy. I will always take your footpicks every time. My foot picks? Do you good feet? We did the whole feet thing.

Oh my God. Wait. Yes. That's right. Yeah. Okay. Oh, we're the podcast. You do the feet thing.

Uh-huh. Remember? Yeah. Your Wiki feet virginity. But I just, I can't get over this because I. And also. I just, Rayne and I say this all the time. These are just our thoughts and opinions.

Whatever you do works for you is fine. Totally. Like when women work for the other way around or same sex couples, but like of, you know, us being like heterosexual women, I was working for my man. Like he's my boss. Yeah. What? Yeah.

I can't. It's hard to wrap my head around. Like, you're going to tell me what to do. Like, I work for you. And I know this people do it and it works. So more power to them. But like the dynamic, you know, what you know about relationship seems like I wouldn't. But I mean, it does.

But it's just. kind of like, yeah, you guys are like equal partners. We also have a pretty hard and fast rule. Like if one of us is in a bad mood, don't record. We just don't record. Right. And we'll just figure it out. We'll figure it out.

It's a great rule. You're like, you know, that would be sick. We would love to. Sometimes it's just like, you know, the studios reserved. Right. This is also like in one of our bedrooms too. Exactly. We could like, we're from home.

We were able to do that in New York. Like I had days. But now you're like put a fucking smile on. We are we are recording right now. Yeah. Oh, yeah. We've tried and do it before me like, should we not? Let's not do this.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. We'll always talk about it ahead of time in the morning and be like, we're in a bad place. But now, yeah, we were at this studio, so we have to do it. Yeah. So you're like, sweet, three o'clock. Do you ever feel like it's too much time together and you're like, I'm going to kill the other person? Are you guys, like pretty chill about me like, I need my space? You guys have a big house.

You can have enough space where I feel like, like, sometimes we'll go a full day. And because you almost the entire relationship, even like way pre-CO. Like, we both worked from the same, like, worked from home. Uh-huh. So we also got lucky in the sense that, like, we never had to. like figure out how to like be in each other's space 24-7 like once COVID started. We kind of like already had our home office situation figured out before that, which I know a lot of couples did not have the luxury of having.

Well, the Adderall sort of 2023. Oh, now I'm like, shut the fuck up. Get, stop following me around. Go somewhere else. Yeah, because I was like, I don't have like working today. I don't have any Adderall. So just comes in my office. What are you doing?

I'll just like pull up my like lunch and just like clear part of her desk. She didn't give me. He'll open up like his Jimmy John's like. foot long. What are you doing? I'm just laughing so hard. And she'll get me that look of like... Can you go do that literally anywhere else in this 4500?

Yes. Anywhere. Anywhere else. You don't ever want to be apart. You have one couch. It's just a bed. Yeah. Well, I'm living that life now in my hobby and be.

It's not exactly what you guys have. But that, if you have a couch that's like a bed situation, I first saw it in your home. It's dangerous. I don't know if you guys saw me snap in pictures. I was just like, what is this thing? And I like, once you live that life, you can't go back. You can't go back.

Is it so fun to have sex on that thing? It was crazy. Do you guys even? You don't have sex on them? Never. You guys have sex? Yes. Not there.

But not there. I don't think I would either. Also, why? You never had sex on that thing. A couple things. One, clean those cushions, putting through the wash, takes hours. If I had the couch that you guys have. What's it called? It's the Restoration Hardware Cloud Couch.

Cloud Couch. If I had that couch, that's the third member of our relationship. And I am treating it with as sacred as it is. The loving on that thing. I mean, it's the size. If you guys, you guys understand what I'm saying, it's like a king-sized. I'd clear California king size. I would say it's like in the living.

Yeah. I mean, we've said this on the podcast. Yeah. And the other thing is that we have dogs. And so it's like if you were to have sex on like a dog like licked a butthole or some, you know what I mean? Like game over. Like that's it.

Got it. Yeah. Oh no. I want to talk about your dogs, but do you guys have any tips for couples who are in this both work from home living in the same home? Or do you guys just you kind of had it figured out beforehand? Because I feel like I keep kind of hearing about this. And this is really, I wouldn't say tearing couples apart.

that's kind of dramatic. But like, it's tough. I think it is. I think it is. Yeah. Yeah. My big thing is like figuring out how to sound wise, separate your shit. So it's not like one person working. It has to detract from the other person.

A lot easier, sad than done. Yeah. But like not being in the same open area as the other person, I think is like key. We literally soundproofed his office. I would, we would literally just screaming on meetings all day. And so I would be annoyed with him the entire day. Yes. You don't even, and sometimes it could even be subconscious.

his fucking voice. His fucking voice is driving me crazy. Everyone's got AirPods in with like their noise cancelling. So like I'm screaming into the phone. Also like meetings with Asia at three in the morning and she for sure wanted to kill me. So it was like if I can like get my like most annoying part of what I do like out of her lifestyle and vice versa, I think that's key. Do you guys have separate friend groups that you can like go and spend time separately? I'm an adult male.

We give up our friends. We were just having this conversation. Let's talk about it. Yeah. So let's talk about it. Let's talk about it. I don't have friends. She has friends that have boyfriends.

Right. Exactly. Okay. Did you have any friends before? Yeah. Do you have any friends? Yeah, but like all guys, all guys give up friends when they get a relationship. I experienced it for the first time.

Like, we had one really super close guy friend. And, like, he would come and stay at our house for, like, weeks. And he would just, like, like, solo? Yeah, because he was just, like, a single dude. He was fun. He was also, like, easy. And so we would invite him and he could hang for as long as he wanted. Got a girlfriend.

Haven't seen him in a year. And I could tell that this was her first experience losing a guy friend. And I was like, well, we'll never see credit again. I have a guy friend like that. I said to Ashley, he got a girlfriend. I never heard from him again. Yeah. And listen, I do understand male-female friendships.

Like, listen, every relationship's different, but I understand a girlfriend comes into the mix. And she's like, you're hanging out this single girl a lot. I don't love it. She talks about sucking dick a lot. Yeah, I also don't think that's fair because, like, if I wanted to sleep with this person, I would have if I wanted to date this person, we would have. So that's not fair. But I do see it happen a lot.

We guys on our show when he was talking about male versus female relationships and why men bounce back from fights quicker than women in friendships because female friendships are just deeper, there's more layers, and so it just maybe hurts more. There's just like a little bit more tears to it. So maybe male friendships are sometimes easier to let go of. It's the most natural thing, sadly, I think, in my growing up. It's not that I don't care about my guy friends. And also like Jeremy is one of his best friends. Like we're still close with him and like chattled at the time. And when he comes over every six months or whatever, whatever it is now, like, it's like nothing has changed. It's just so funny like how, like surface level,

because you guys have been friends for so long, but, like, I need my girlfriends for survival. Like, we're constantly talking. We see each other, you know, a couple times a week. Like, I need, it's like my literal lifeline. This is so interesting. And I was talking to a good girlfriend of mine. She's married. And, like, she was saying that she feels not bad, not guilty. Like, they have a healthy marriage. But, like, she still, she does a lot stuff with her girlfriends. And, like, his guy friends have kind of gone by the waist side. And I'm like, but I remember him having all these guys friends at the wedding and they were golfing and they were doing all this. And she's like, yeah, like, one's married, one's this. And I'm like, but, but, but, but,

But who cares? You know, like, we still are able to do our girl group, all of our stuff. And so that was like, now you're saying it. I'm like, what is going on here? Guys just... I see the way, though, that he plans things socially, which is not at all. So it's like if we do anything social and, like, one of our girlfriends' boyfriends is there, or my girlfriend's boyfriend is there, and, like, they hang out and their buds, like, great,

but it's because I've organized it. I don't think it's unique to you. By the way, my brother has said this to me as well. My brother was, I'm saying it's like a thing. Yeah. Oh, yeah, for sure. Football, college football. He works in finance.

My brother is surrounded by men. He's a really nice, fun, cool person to be around. He was just like, I woke up one day and I didn't have friends. And all of his friends are married and they spend time with them in events. Yep. Right. With the couples. But I think it's much more rare for like a man to reach out and be like, let's go to a bar.

Like what you would. Hey, friend. Let's go drive a drink. I feel like guys mature at different rates. And also when they get in relationships, certain parts about their friendships, is not always cool. And their, like, their, like, form of entertainment isn't something you can casually dip into on a Tuesday.

So it's like, okay, like, have you outgrown what you did with that friendship? Right. And did the other side of that friendship also grow with you at the same time? Or was there an imbalance which, like, left, like, nine months of this weird, like, you didn't really talk to them phase? And then it just kind of continued. So, like, a lot, you're saying, like, a lot of these male friendships are based on, like, getting, like, really fucked up or chasing women or something.

Yeah. Yeah. Because they're activity-based. Like, women are, our main activity is sitting down on the couch. and drinking wine and talking. Exactly. It's like, that's never going to change. Literally.

We can do that no matter what stage of life we're in, where guys were like, we used to just like golf and go to the strip club, and now everyone's married. It's like you could do that, but it'd be weird. Yeah, that's interesting. Yeah, that's true.

I never thought about it like that, about the activities that we do. And I'm thinking about my brother. I think, I mean, my brother just lives in a small town, and that's, it's easy. Everybody's around doing the same shit. So it kind of, I feel like he hasn't really lost the guy friends.

But it's like they're all probably in like a five-mile radius. the whole town. Right. The whole, everyone, all you're in the same fantasy football league and they just get to...

Like, if I go home, I'll go to get a drink with these people haven't seen for a long time. But it's, there's just this different relationship the guys have. And I'm like very cognizant of it,

yet I have no idea how to fix it. It's really interesting because, I mean, Jeremy, I think you're wonderful. We love talking to you. I love you too as a couple. I think that you're really nice to be around.

It's not because you aren't awesome. I see this in a lot of men. It's not unique to you. I think also, too, as you get older specifically, I think this happens with a lot of guys. Like, I feel like I saw it happen with my own dad too, is that as you get older, like, not that you're becoming a crotchety old man, but like he just enjoys silence more than ever.

I mean, it's my dad too. My mom has more friends than anybody, more friends than me and I have a lot of friends. Like my dad is just like, literally, it's just like, why? Yeah. Like, he just enjoys doing nothing or like doing laundry listening to a podcast in silence. Like, this is 31. When you hear it like when I hear it like, oh, God, I'm okay. Yeah.

No, it's fine. It's all, this is what we're saying. It's all like, this is happening to everybody. Yeah. We, unfortunately have to wrap up with you guys because we're not in our homes. You're like, and the studio space is booked. I wanted to wrap up with just like your dogs, like an update. You guys adopted your dog's dad.

Mm-hmm. Right. Yeah. Yeah. Why is that so funny? No, it's wild. Terriers, right? Yes.

Okay. It's like meta like when you're like explaining to somebody. well this is this new one, he's his dad. Like that never, like no one ever just goes, oh, okay. Like, wait, what? Yeah, you have to like explain. So how, so you had the first dog. So we had, so Moose is the younger dog.

And so he is, you met most, he's five. And I adopted him at like eight weeks as a puppy. Yes. The breeder that I kind of stayed in contact with, um, called me in September, October-ish and was like, we have to downsize our property. And, um, we're like looking for fosters for a lot of our dogs. and they were heartbroken.

They obviously, like, loved their animals, but they had to downsize. They had, like, 10 acres in Sacramento, and we're moving into an apartment. And I was like, oh, my God, I have so many friends that love Moose. I'm sure we can find someone that would love to have Moose's dad,

which is obviously 50% of his DNA. The dumb half, but yeah. The dumb half, yeah. For sure, the dumb half, yeah. For sure, the dumb half. Which we learned. Oh, my God. And I think we toyed with the idea of fostering first.

About seven seconds. Or about seven seconds. Yeah. And what about if we were the foster parents? It was actually Jeremy, who was who made the foster parents. executive decision. Let's get his dad. Like, how is that dog's dad

going to be available and we don't take him? You have to. You have to. Like, if someone right now was like, we found Azul's dad, I'd be like, break. Now you have two dogs. I guess I have his dad. Yeah. I would. Yeah. I'd be like, any more family members? Right. You've got cousins? I'll take him too. What you didn't realize, though, is Azul's dad

like showed up two years older than Azul and however old Azul is and was not potty trained. Doesn't really know his name. He doesn't know what to say. It doesn't know what to say. He doesn't know anything. No, there's nothing, but very sweet. He's so sweet. Anyways, we are facing the challenges of what it's like to raise a puppy except for he's seven.

Yeah, we're on the journey of learning. Wait, this is so bizarre that the dad is. When the parent becomes the child. That's exactly what it is. That's literally exactly what it is when the parent becomes the child. He's like a baby. He's a baby. He's up for eight seven.

Yeah. This is crazy. I went to watch this journey now. I'm so invested. And then you're just like, learn from your son. Oh. No, we literally are like your brother dad, like your brother son, your brother dad. Because like,

It's cool because like, if you were to like try and draw the family tree of like if we're the parents. But then the other new dog is Moose's. And it's all very confusing. But we now have Moose's dad. Oh. Yeah. I love it. Yeah.

Well, I know if people are going to want to fall along with this journey with the dogs and you guys. And everything. Yeah. I wish you guys could just stay forever. We love you so much. But tell everybody where they can find you guys. Your Instagram's, obviously the podcast, YouTube, everything.

Plug away. Um, while until 9 is our podcast. I feel like I also did a terrible dump. I, like told half. of the Nails pre-engagement story. So we have more content on that, obviously, over on Wild Soul 9. And then I'm Lord DIY on everything, everywhere else. I don't use social media, really.

But if you want to hop over to the podcast, it'll be there. Okay. Well, thank you guys so much. This was really such a pleasure. We love having you. Yes, I love the teams. If you feel like you didn't get something out, it lives on your podcast. It lives on the internet forever.

Check it out there. Thanks for taking five minutes off from your tour schedule. You're running out. I know. My God. Your global kingdom that you're building to hang out. We landed last day and I was like, how we can do this today. You guys made it really easy.

So thank you. We love you guys. And you guys know where to find everything Girls Got to Eat at Girls Got to Eat.com, tour tickets, merchandise, vibes only.com, vibes only on Instagram. I'm going to go out of order here. Girls Got E podcast on Instagram. I'm Ash Hess. Rain is Rain.

comberg. TikTok. I haven't mentioned that in a couple weeks, but the TikTok is blowing up-ish. Girls Got Eat Podcast and our YouTube as well. Subscribe, share with a friend. And we'll see next week. Have a good week, guys. Bye.