Girls Gotta Eat - How to Be F*cking Confident with Serena Kerrigan

Episode Date: July 22, 2024

If you've ever asked "How can I be more confident?", this episode is for you. We are so f*cking excited to have Serena F*cking Kerrigan to talk about how to be confident and why it's crucial for finding the right partner (and filtering out the wrong ones). We discuss her relationship (how they met, dating a younger man, and the "screenshot" test for knowing if someone is right for you) as well as tips for meeting people in the wild (eye f*cking, anyone?). She shares how she turned a Covid dating strategy into a business and why her card games are the perfect way to elevate a date, your sex life, and more. Then we define what "doing it for the plot" really means and play "Plot to Not" to determine if our listeners' spiciest scenarios qualify. Before Serena joins us, we're breaking down phone behavior and deciding what's "normal" or not when it comes to charging, texting, and more, plus talking about invisible string theory. Enjoy! Follow Serena on Instagram @serenakerrigan, buy her card games at letsfuckingdate.com, and subscribe to her newsletter The Plot. Follow us @girlsgottaeatpodcast, Ashley @ashhess, and Rayna @rayna.greenberg. Visit girlsgottaeat.com for tour dates, merchandise, and more. Thank you to our partners this week: Article: Get $50 off your first purchase of $100 or more at article.com/gge. Gametime: Get $20 off your first purchase when you download the Gametime app and create an account with the code GGE. Seed: Get 25% off VS-01 at seed.com/gge with code 25GGE. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

And also confidence is so hot. Like, period. This podcast is a Dear Media production. Hi guys. Hi guys. Welcome back to another episode of Girls Gotta Eat. Welcome back. And just like that, another cancer season comes to a close.

Farewell, dear readers. When you posted your like European wrapup, were you kind of trying to channel Bridgerton with your caption? I was just trying to channel like the Olympics. Oh. The 2024 summer season comes to a close. Did you read it as Bridgeton test? I'm sad. I didn't think of it.

Well, you wrote farewell to your readers and I was like, I'm so mad. I didn't think of that. Right. So I went to the Bridgeterton exhibit in London. I went. But you did think of it. You did write it. Unknowingly.

By accident. Oh, you mean like the, what's the season in Bridgeton? The like, find a husband's season. The social season. All right. I want to read Rainier's cute caption. She did a bunch of pictures like from Europe. And with that, my 20,

before European summer season comes to a close. That feels straight out of Bridgeton. You didn't know what you were doing. I thought I was doing sports. And then I was in the comments. I think people really look for my comments in your post. Like people, I think if they don't see a comment for me, they're like upset.

Like I felt the pressure every time because I was on fire while you were gone. And I was like, I got to get in there. I got to like hit those comments. And I was like, how is no one written like, farewell dear reader? I couldn't believe when you wrote it. I was like, I can't believe it. I didn't think to post that. But you did.

Anyway, Rayna. Dot Greenberg. Like and comment. Follow for more. And then like my comments, Ash has. I can use some followers.

I should just pin it. I mean, it's always the one of the top. You just pin every comment of mine. Relax. I'm kind of like, Raina's too much. You just don't comment on one.

People are like, they're in a fight. No, I feel like if people don't see me in there, they read into it. There was a comment about you not commenting on my nude. And somebody was like, Ashley didn't comment.

on this. I'm like, Ashley, do you, also, you post stuff and I just don't think, I just, I have a reaction to it personally and I just move along. I don't comment on a lot of people's stuff. Like, I really don't. Sometimes I don't have the energy. Like, I want, if I'm commenting, it needs to be witty. Also, by the way, I have been trolling. Who you're trolling? The New Yorker. About political stuff. I, for the first time my life, wrote, oof, unsubscribe. I too, have been trolling about it. stuff. Okay, hold on.

I want to hear about it. But I was in the right side of history. All the comments were like, this is irresponsible. Journalism, whatever. So I wrote, I was so mad at this thing. Whatever. I don't need to like give them more exposure. But I wrote like, oof, hard unsubscribe.

At least the comments passed the vibe check and got tons of likes. Isn't that so gratifying? Yeah. Okay. What have you been trolling? Oh my God. The Washington Post posted that like the elite summer like girls dinner is Caesar salad of french fries and a martini.

And I was like, I feel like I met with this and I'm not getting the proper credit. We trolled different stuff. Yeah. Oh, there was somebody that like, whatever, it doesn't like me. It was trolling me. It's like, why are you here? But because you were in Italy and so was everybody. Like, it always feels like this every summer.

Everyone's there at the same time. And like people like me feel left out, whatever. So I was just in Boston. So I wrote like Boston is the new Italy. That's hilarious. Yeah, like trolling myself, making fun of myself, being self-deprecating. You know, and someone goes, tell me you're jealous. Serena's trip without telling me.

You were invited on the trip? First of all, I'm invited. We make the same amount. But I go, yeah, that's the joke here. That's the bit. Boston's not exotic. You think I'm competing with Raina? In Boston?

You were literally invited. I went to Paris with your closest friends. And the bride of the wedding kept saying to me, Ashley could have come. I'm like, no, Ashley knows she could have come. I have regrets. It won't happen again. You won't fuck up the summer season of 2025. All right. Let's thank our partners and we'll get right into it.

Thank you to Seed. Get 25% off Vs.01 at seed.com slash GGE with code 25 GGE. Yes. And thanks to article, get $50 off your first purchase of $100 or more at article.com slash gge. And thanks to GameTime, get $20 off your first purchase when you download the GameTime app and create an account with the code GGE. Okay, can I vent to you about something? Yeah. I want your feelings on this. So we are recording on my birthday. We don't even talk about my birthday.

It's been weeks now. But like we just are getting a little bit ahead. So today I'm in the thick of it. Can I tell you something that bothers me so much? The thick of your birthday? Like it's the day of, the thick of the day. The thick of what I'm about to vent about. Okay.

Emails from businesses. Spam. Wishing me happy birthday with no discount. Who's doing this? They all do it. There's no 25% off. No free ice cream cake. Delta, where's my miles?

I don't need you in my inbox. Unsubscribe me. No. A dermatologist I went to once in 2021. Happy birthday. Every company I've ever bought one thing from, happy birthday, happy birthday. Like, can you imagine a business,

we run a business? Can you imagine for vibes only? Being like, you know what we should do? Email everyone on their birthday. And then someone in the boardroom is like, and give them a discount? No. But we're a product company.

Just let them. No. Delta. Give me 41 miles. Make it funny. Make it a schick. Like, how dare Delta be in my inbox today with nothing? That's crazy.

Made well or whoever the fuck else. Who wants this? I just think it's so crazy. Like, don't you see, on your birthday, you get a million emails from businesses? I mean, I can't even keep up with the text messages from men in my life. Text messages too. Today. This random.

Pistola. Skin. facial place. Happy birthday. From our family to yours. I don't have a family. Leave it alone. Where's the discount? Pistola jeans stays texting me. They won't stop. Somebody's just, it's stop.

No, I just think it's so funny. It's a crazy business decision. That's so, I always think about this. Like, everybody's in the room together. One person's like discount. The other one's like, no. No, here's one. And like, I don't need this NYU Langone.

No. What even is that? In the special day, we're sending you warm birthday wishes. As you mark another year, we want to thank you for trustness with your care. And first of all, I've moved away. Made this new year be filled with positive experience. What did you do at NYU? But stuff.

Healthcare. What would you get? Health care wise. Just the system. You're in the system. You know, doctors are part of like a bigger system. Yeah. But like, where are you getting doctor stuff done in New York?

I don't even remember. My guy now? That's so funny. What did you go to a doctor? I don't remember you ever going to a doctor in seven years, except for when we got to L.A., you do butt stuff. You're right. It's all been about my butt.

I just think it's such an interesting choice. That is hysterical. Just give me 10% off. Stop it. Right. 41 cents? Yeah. That's hilarious.

It's so funny. Yeah. Delta is the biggest, most egregious offense. Well, let's show people how it's done, Ashley. So in honor of this episode and Serena Kargan, we just thought we'd do a fun giveaway for you guys and brighten your day because we own a product company. And so does Serena. Exactly.

And I texted her and we were like, we want to do a giveaway with your card game and our vibrators. And she was like, fuck yes, whatever you want. Serena has these great card games. We're going to play it during the episode also with her. But she has let's fucking date and let's fucking play. And we're going to do a giveaway in conjunction with her. So her card game, you're going to win two packs and our Debbie vibrator. It's an Air Pulse vibe.

It's my favorite vibrator that we sell. It's a nice big hole to suck on that clip. It is the best orgasm I've ever had in my entire life. It will make my entire body shake. I black out. It's incredible. beautiful packaging so a nice gift for somebody else or yourself so to enter we posted something on instagram on our feed so you go to girls got to eat on instagram and if you comment tag a friend

follow vibes only our product account and let's fucking date for serena you'll be entered to win and we're going to pick multiple winners and this is really all you need to spice things up alone alone on a first date with your partner these two card games get the juices flowing and then once those juices are flowing just vacuum suction your clit with the debby So this is a horny giveaway. That's for sure. So go ahead, go to our Instagram, comment, tag a friend, follow the two accounts, vibes only, let's fucking date, you'll be entered to win.

And we will pick two winners. We're going to do 48 hours. So it will close Tuesday at midnight. And it will be obvious which real it is, but just make sure you're on the right one. It's going to be the one that talks about the giveaway. So hit the right comment section on that one. Good luck. Okay.

May the odds be ever in your favor. Yes. You said you have stuff to tell me. Okay. Let's play a game. called is my boyfriend a serial killer or not. Okay. Something we all love to play.

Yeah. Because, you know, you're like someone that toes the line. It's a little hot. So this was something that I've kind of been picking up on, but I just straight of ass this past weekend. Okay. So he does not charge his phone at night. I thought this would surprise me more. That's it?

Doesn't everyone charge their phone at night? I don't. What? Is your business partner a serial killer? When do you charge it? Whenever the wind blows. I don't know. Shut up, Raina.

You don't plug it in at night? No! I get worried about overcharging. I feel like you're so shocked right now. I thought you were going to... Do you charge your phone at night? What are you guys saying to me? I thought everyone plugged in their phone.

Maybe us. Who's a serial killer now? That's me. Try to charge, shame, everybody else. But like, I don't give a fuck. what y'all do i'm not shaming i find it crazy i thought we all wanted to wake up and start our day at 100% why because then you're out doing stuff like where am i going wherever are you going i don't know anywhere so you feel comfortable waking up at like a 30 that what a dream and then you'll

just drain it and then what if you have to run out i don't run out where am i running out rena i feel i feel good if it's over at 10 i need you guys in these comments i It's really no judgment. I thought everyone was plugging their phone in next to their bed and letting it charge at night. Sometimes if the mood strikes, but almost never. Literally almost never. Around what time were you charging?

Throughout the day. Sometimes first thing in the morning. Also, my routine. I sleep with my phone on the right side of the bed and my nightstand is on the left side of the bed next to me. And it's not near the charger. I mean, I could put it near the charger, but I'm not going to. The charger is near my night's down on the left side, but the phone, I'm more comfy.

I'm more comfy on the right side. You think you know someone. I mean, I understand what you say. I think the overcharging thing is like a myth. I mean, you are supposed to let your phone kind of drain out. But like for me, I mean, when your phone is getting towards the end of its lifespan, you know, when the new one comes out or whatever it is, or for me, if two or three new ones have come out.

It does start to die. You can't really get through a whole day. But now, for the most part, I mean, I charge my phone while I'm sleeping. I wake up. I'm at 100. And slowly over the day, a normal day, it's mostly dead by the end of the day. And I plug it in again. And that's what I thought was the norm.

No. I don't know anything. You guys have to let us know. We have to do a poll. I think this is like so crazy. At night when he and I've been going to bed, I'm plugged in. And I'm always like, babe, do you want to plug in your, let me get you a charger. Like I'm always trying because I'm like, I thought this is how we all lived.

No. also he's with you who does he need to talk to you don't talk to anybody else oh yeah he doesn't give a fuck his phone can die he doesn't he doesn't talk to anybody else but he also is somebody who goes to work every day from you know eight to five or whatever so he can plug it in at work so for me i like i just don't know what the day is going to hold so i feel the opposite so my reasoning for why i don't charge it is that we work from my house i very rarely go work anywhere i'm always at the house i work from the house i work out at the house if i go grocery shopping i walk to a Airwant, it's a five-minute walk and I walk back.

I mean, the longest I'm out of my house is like, I take my little special walk for like one hour a day and I make sure she's charged up. But like, what am I at right now? Something low. I'm at 72. It is 3 p.m. up 72 because I woke up at 100. If I were to wake up and my phone was like in the red, I'm like, I was drugged last night. You know, like, or if I wake up and it didn't charge for some reason and it's at like a 30 or a 40,

I'm anxious. Like, I need to wake up with a full charge. I must taste so good to wake up with a full charge. I don't think I'm never in a full charge. I don't understand this. I thought we all had a charger. This is crazy. No.

And then when I was in New York for a while there, I didn't want to sleep with my phone in my bed because I was like scrolling too much at night. And so it was like charging in the living room. Because I also, if you don't want to have your phone next to your bed, that's fine too. But I was still charging it overnight. No. And listen, you guys don't need to come at me and tell me a phone does not need a charge overnight.

It's not about that. I know, like, especially with some of these superchargers, like my phone can charge fully in 20 or 30 minutes. So it's not about that. This isn't like my fucking ember mug, which apparently takes 24 hours to get 45 minutes of heat. But it's just like, I know it doesn't need that long. But like my whole life I've charged overnight. So I'm just, I have superchargers all over the house. Find me a corner of the house.

It doesn't have a charge. Okay. Bragg. Kitchen. Yeah, it costs like $10. Super charters all over the house. Yeah. Follow me for more tips on how to charge.

I have chargers in my bathroom, my bedroom, downstairs in the bathroom, in the kitchen. Find me a place. It does have a charger. This is so funny. Raina's like superchargers, short chargers, long chargers. Yeah, car charger. Car chargers. They're just everywhere.

Amazon chargers, Apple chargers. Also, on top of this, you know that I use my computer to text and send DMs. Yeah. Almost exclusively. Yeah. Raina in the DMs on her computer is such a vibe. That is so crazy you don't do that. I message on my computer all day, but not DM.

Raina. funny to that be. That's so weird. It's so weird that you guys think it's weird. It feels like a mobile only habit. It's funny when you look over and rain is in her DMs on desktop. Like something about it feels so boomer. It feels like my mom is like, what am I? What is this? It will change your life. I feel like I discovered this in like 2021. A friend of mine, Melanie was like, you can DM. I know. Melanie told me you could do. I thought it was a mobile only habit. Melanie was like, no, you could have it on your desktop. And I was like, I mean, there have been moments like when I was giving money away at a lot people, which I should be, but you know, like, 2020, 2021, I was, like, giving away a lot of money just to

people who DM me, probably got scammed. And I still do donate a lot to people in different things. I try to make a little more legitimate with GoFundMe's and stuff like that. But I was just sending people money a lot. And I was like, share your story with me, tell me if you're out of work, COVID, this and that. You're really hard. Not me. And it was like a lot easier to manage on my desktop. So this is another thing with my serial killer of a partner. He doesn't, I message on his computer. Oh, what? I know. What is he doing? But I guess he's not writing out. He's not a girl, so he's not writing out a bunch of long stuff. He just keeps on his phone. I mean, I text with 25 people a day, and I have a lot of feelings, and you and I are in 100 group chats. Like, I would die. Oh, have you ever

needed to respond to a text? And you're like, I got to wait until I'm on my computer for that. That's what voice notes are for. But if you're like, I'm not going to, I want to write this out. I want to pound away, fucking keyboard warrior this. shit. But kind of even more before like the voice note era, like I would be like, oh, I got to get to my computer for that one. I will say, though, you don't realize how hard you're going when you're typing on your computer. Like one of the things I would do when I was first starting to date somebody knew was not do that on my desktop because you'd write too much. You want to slow yourself down. You got to slow yourself down. You got to see how it looks when it comes through. Because have you

ever like, do to do written about you just you're going at it's an email on your desktop on I message. and then it fills the screen on their phone. You're like, I am so embarrassing. Okay, so I do it a lot in my notes section and then transfer it to text. And in the notes section, I'm like, this looks normal, like a normal conversation. And then in text, it fills the screen. I'm like, I got to dial it in. Have you ever opened a text and expanded into your notes?

Yeah, I hate it. Yeah. So that was a rule that I set for myself when I was like early with somebody dating. It was just like, I don't want to have these long, like, I just want to keep it looking normal in the scope of texting. I think that feels, I think you want to like match their energy also. Yeah, there's that too. I'm not trying to send you like long paragraphs of stuff if you're just giving me like not that much. Well, I guess it's that too.

And then you, I'm talking very early on. Yeah. You know what I mean? It's like, however you want to communicate is your prerogative. But for me, I'm like, I don't, that even looks cringe to me. Like, why did I go that hard? Why did I say so much? It's overly available.

Right. Like, what am I journaling? This stream of consciousness was like a new person. So, well, okay. I thought I knew the people in my life. Nobody. You don't know anything. We thought we knew you.

We're all band together. Like, can you believe her? Okay, also the other thing why I worry about overcharging is I've killed my laptop battery before. Like I've had to go to Best Buy and buy a new laptop battery because of overcharging. Yeah. Now, what is it? It's a surge protector will stop. Yeah, I think it's a myth.

Or at least, yeah, I don't think that's a thing anymore. Okay. With iPhones. It should stop the charging. Yeah, I don't think it's just continuing to like power through once it's done. Pound your phone. Yeah, they're like, we're done here. Well, the new models, but you guys, you wouldn't know.

I'm like five years. You and Melanie both. She is like the 13. Why the new one now? Yeah. She doesn't. She works in tech. She's like pretty high up at a tech company.

Yeah. I had the 10 for a while. I kept that 10. The X. I had the 12 for a while. The day the new iPhone comes out, I buy it. That is a real difference with you and I. I feel like people would be surprised because like you're the more tech person.

You're on Instagram more. At least you used to be. Now you're a different person. I know I'm back on. I knew that wasn't going to last. I mean, I'm still adhering to my. My, to your hours. Yeah.

To my like time cut off for the most part. Not today. It's my birthday. So when you get a new iPhone, do you get the biggest, baddest one? Yeah, I get the Pro Max. No, storage. I'm doing 256, baby. Okay.

Because yeah, I mean, I'm just like, I don't always need the newest one. Like, this one's working just fine. Like, I have storage. It's still speedy enough. But yeah, another thing is a big difference between us is you turn in your iPhones and I keep all of them. I don't, well, I'm not rich like you are. Oh, my God. I can't afford it.

Superchargers all over the house. Those are $10. I can't afford it. Raina, what do you? I don't understand it. It's European summer. I am sentimental and I like to keep. I don't know what that means.

I'm sentimental. You transfer all the data to the next phone. I don't always transfer it. Listen, I'm a little, I'm not the best back or upper. Everything's backed up somewhere. I'm not as organized, though. Organized. The internet does it.

You're shaming me and I don't like the tone. You're the head of this podcast tech part. Like everything is somewhere. Rana, I just, I don't. I like to keep them and I don't know how to explain it. I like having all of the old models. You know, it'll be in my like museum one day.

I like keeping them. I don't know how else, I don't know what else to say. But your phone, like, they mean a lot to me. I like your even. Like, what do you do with them?

They're in a fog. But like, okay, your I message is connected to the cloud. Your email is connected to the cloud. Your photos are connected to the cloud. But sometimes, there was a couple years where I wasn't in the cloud. You were out the cloud. I was out the cloud.

Wait, who else keeps them? Jeremy? Yeah, Jeremy's insane. Now I have to know Jeremy charges his phone at night. And if he DMs on his desktop. Definitely phone, doesn't DM on a desktop. I wish I had them all here for you guys right now so you could see them. Like, we could show them all.

If nobody cared, then you'd be like, I get them back. The five, the seven, the ten of the 12. Also, isn't your plan that you like pay it off? Like, that's the plan I'm under is I pay. It's like a rental fee essentially with Verizon. that like they changed it like four years ago. No, my phone's, she's paid for. Raina, come on.

I don't have a payment plan. I'm for my phone. I've achieved. I mean, I'm just renting my phone. So when they roll out the new one, I'm just going to give it back like a car. Listen, for years I had to rent my phone. But now I do buy them outright.

That's the gold standard. And I don't own a home, but I own my phone. I own my car. I own my iPhones and I pay rent. The only thing I own is my job. Jeep. That's it. I don't own anything else. All right. Let's take a quick break and then we'll get back into it and you have a lot of things to discuss. I am going to tell you guys about game time. You know, I feel so passionate about game time. I talked about them recently where I got scammed on some tickets and I was able to get last minute tickets with game time. So they may get any tickets for concerts and events faster and easier. Even if you don't buy the tickets right away. I mean, I got mine literally the day before and the price is actually. I actually go down the closer it gets to show start time. They have killer last minute deals, all in prices, views from the seat. I love that. I have to see that view from the seat. I don't

want to buy a ticket unless I've seen a view from the seat. Well, I used a different site to do my Taylor Swift tickets and I had a different idea of where my seats were. Yeah, their view from the seat is great. Again, their lowest price guarantee and they take the guest work out of buying tickets. Okay, so I just went ahead and got in the app right now. I'm going to look at some concerts because I feel like I'm kind of out of sports that I care about right now. You know, now that we're like, basketball's over, football hasn't really started yet. So music, I'm seeing Missy Elliott. That is such a hot tour this summer. They have some great tickets. I'm seeing tickets starting at like $55 for upcoming shows, $55, $85, some really great prices there. Tate McCray.

Everybody loves Tate McCray. Yeah, I'm seeing like all kinds of stuff on the app. So any concert, any extraordinary that you guys want to go to, just go in there and see what they have going on. And I said this before, that I found my exact tickets somewhere else. And they were the exact seats, exact same tickets and hundreds of dollars cheaper on game time. when I got the Celtics tickets, of course. So we just really love it. We love all the features. They have protections for event cancellations.

Like you can feel secure. This isn't some like third party thing that you can't trust. So you can take the guest work out of buying concert tickets with GameTime. Download the GameTime app, create an account, and use code GGE for $20 off your first purchase. Terms apply. Again, create an account and redeem code GGE for $20 off. Download game time today. Last minute tickets, lowest price guaranteed.

And it's super easy. So even when we signed up for it, they gave us a credit. Super easy. But again, just throw in that code GGE. And then you just are going to go right into your profile, into your game time credit. I'm looking at mine right now. And you're going to have that 20 bucks in there. So super easy.

Okay. It doesn't take much to change the balance of your day-to-day life. Same goes for the sensitive vaginal microbiome. You guys know I've had some problems recently, you know? You never know who's going to change it for you or what's going to change it for you. You never know who's going to walk into your life and change your vaginal microbiome. And it's worth it. But listen, you've got to get back to Norm.

It's worth it. Sometimes it's not worth it. Half the time it's not worth it. Nine out of ten women have an unstable vaginal microbiome. That's why seed created Vs. 01 vaginal symbiotic to restore a healthy vaginal microbiome and sustain regular pH levels. So I definitely, as I've gotten older, have paid much more attention to, Not who I put my body, but what?

Yeah. Definitely what. I'm eating better, and I like stuff that's research backed. So their rigorous scientific testing is super reassuring, and I appreciate their commitment to microbiome science. So just like your gut has unique microbiome, so does your vagina. So the vaginal microbiome is a natural defense system and key driver of gynecological urogenital.

You guys, I know I'd get there, and reproductive health. Raina, when you said I've been learning new work. Raina was like, I'm so excited to be doing the seed reads because I've been learning new war. Eurogenital. Say that in the bedroom. Babe, you're really fucking with my Eurogenital. You're hitting my Eurogenital. Could you go to a little left?

Sorry. Because you pull out tonight, you've been really hitting my Eurogenital. This company's going to fire us. This stays in. That is so funny. Babe, could you come on my back tonight?

It's my Eurogenital's a note. You're welcome, Seed. How am I supposed to get back into it? But day-day things like menstruation, exercise, diet, stress, sex can easily disrupt your Eurogenitals. Also, you had Eurogenitals. You had Eurogenitals for two full weeks. Right in her Eurogenitals.

Well, I started with UK genitals and I had Eurogenitals. And all this days, just so we're clear. Anyways, VS-O-1 marks a new era in vaginal care with a sustainable approach. Do I need to finish this? Okay. VSO1 marks a new era in vaginal care with sustainable approach to address the root causes of imbalances, whatever that may be, the first clinically validated vaginal probiotic with three proprietary L-christis strains to restore a healthy vaginal microbiome and protect against daily disruptions in your pH.

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seed.com slash gge code 25 gge. Thank you for tagging in. There's no way I can be able to do that. Okay, so what do you have to ask me about? Well, I've just been seeing this a lot on TikTok, and I want to talk about it, the invisible string theory. I find it really interesting. So it's an ancient Chinese belief that certain people are destined to be in your life, but the universe waits to introduce you to them until the exact moment that you need each other.

So the theory is that is an invisible red thread connects those who are destined to meet, regardless of time and place and circumstance. So is it tied to like Taylor Swift's song or is her song just about this? So the Taylor Swift song, basically, people are talking about it because she wrote this song in 2006 called Mary's song and a line in the song says I'll be 87 and you'll be 89 and his numbers jersey number is 87 and they're both born in 1989 and it's this just idea that like there are these people that are sort of in our lives just connected by this thread but like we the universe doesn't introduce us to them until we're ready so I like think about this a lot with like connections and my brother is really interesting in that sense because like him and his wife both lived in Pittsburgh growing up and all three of my brother's best friends growing up, the groomsmen in his wedding, his best men,

all three of them knew her in different ways growing up and she never even heard her name, never met her. Arlen, like, grew up and he played baseball with this one kid, David, who grew up with Adriana. Arlen never even heard of her, never met her. And then she went to a formal, some kind of Greek, like, formal with one of his other best friends. Also had no idea who he was.

They didn't meet until they were 22. But, like, yeah, there's all these invisible threads between them, but, like, they didn't meet until I think they were ready. to be in relationships. And like, the thing with, like, you and Sparkle Eyes is like he was sort of in your life, kind of, but like you guys didn't come back around together until it was like the perfect timing

for both of you. Well, we can talk about that, but we can also talk about me and you. But I mean, yeah, it's so crazy. Like, I think of how it all played out.

And again, I'm never trying to like breadcrumb the story. It's just like a long, drawn out story. And I have share pieces here and there. And, you know, if you've been to the live shows, I've told it in full.

But there's so many different. opponents of it. You know, he first saw me at one of our virtual live shows and just was like drawn to me on the screen and like at his best friend's house where his wife was watching it and like hosting one of those like COVID shows. You know, like we were talking the other day of like why he even ended up over there in the first place. And then the fact that like she emailed us and then it was the show and then years later like our story is so wild. And like it wasn't that long. Like I find these stories so cool and they span five, 10 years, you know. And, ours was two plus years, two and a half years. But I totally believe in that. And I cannot

stress enough that we only met when we were ready. Like I think of if we would have tried this before or something, I don't know when we would have, but like I did go to Boston the year before. I went on my personal tour. We didn't connect, you know, and then it wouldn't have worked. I just know it wouldn't have. And I don't know why. It's that's not anything against him or it's just like, it happened in the exact perfect time. Unfortunately, it was when I had moved. moved all the way across the country, but like, whatever it was, it was like, that's just the perfect timing. Like, I do feel like the universe was like, they're not ready and then, like, put them together at this exact moment in time. And we talk about that all the time with you and I.

I mean, I think Invisible Strings means there's, like, connections and different things throughout. Like, I think it doesn't always apply, but like you and I just, when we talk about the place in life where we were and when we may have, like, cross pass. And there's, you know, that one random friend connection we had between the two of us and, like, that trip we went on of, like, when you weren't supposed to go and when I almost didn't go and different things like that. And I know that's not exactly the theory that you're talking about. But it is, but it is sort of it's like something ties you together and like I wasn't going to go on that trip. The trip where you met on, they moved the date of the trip for me.

Yeah. Because I couldn't go. And like, you could have easily been like, I'm not trying to do this. That trip was so crazy. Because again, Raina said she couldn't go. They moved it specifically for her and Jeremy or something. Like you guys were two. It's only five people on the trip.

So it was like they wanted you on it. And I was definitely a B-list pick. they asked me a week or two before if I could go on that trip. And the day they asked me, earlier in the day, I was having this thing with my ex. And I was like, I need to get out of town. I just need like a getaway and clear my head. And then I got that offer. Like, I couldn't believe it.

It was like shocking. And so there was that. But is that more of the butterfly effect that you're talking about? The butterfly effect is an often misunderstood phenomenon where in a small change in conditions can lead to vastly different outcomes. Yeah. And it's sort of this idea that like, when you like run into somebody on the street in a city that you both don't live in.

Like 15 different things had to happen for you to end up in that place. Like when my ex and I broke up, I ran into him on his birthday in this sunglasses store that I never go to and a part of town I would have never gone to. But 15 things had happened that day

to put me in that store at that exact same time on his birthday and him too. So like that's the butterfly effect is like very small things. Like if you miss a subway stop and you're hungry and you decide to go get a coffee

or you go to the bathroom, there's a long line. Like all those things going to prevented us from running into each other. But everything lined up perfectly. This is more like red string theory, you and me meeting, because if you and your ex had had a great week that week, you wouldn't have gone on the trip.

Oh, yeah. But I mean, one thing that you talk about that I feel like is relevant to that is like how you felt like Jeremy didn't make it on the flight. And so he didn't come until the next day. And you said that like you just would have been in your own little world with Jeremy. That's your best friend, you know, at like the dinner and like on the boat the next day. But instead he wasn't there.

He wasn't like a crutch. Not that you need a crutch in social situations. Yeah, but if he like wants to go to bed after dinner, I probably would have been like, eh, how don't need to stay up? Right. You know? Like him not being there. I feel like forced you to like make friends and stay up all night.

And that's the night that we like stayed up all night talking, tried to crash this wedding. And then he wasn't even there the next day. So that's when we're on the boat. And we really got to know each other. And that was like, oh, I think like something is going on with this girl. I think we're going to like be friends. So those little things, the circumstances that have to happen is literally like what he couldn't get on the flight because of his equipment.

Like he was what at the gate. And they were like, you can't come. Yeah, they wouldn't let him on with it. And he refused to check it. He refused, yeah. And they like sure you got to check it. So I totally do believe in it. People have some really cool ones.

There was like one, I think it was Jordan for Mean Girl Pod and her boyfriend, Pete. And I just saw a clip of it and like how he had commented on something of hers years before or something like that. And it wasn't that he had been like pining for her for years. I can't remember. I don't want to misspeak on it. But it was like something that they both found that they were like, oh my God. Like you knew who I was then. Little things like that.

If you go on TikTok, people have like crazy examples of this. This one guy posted that he in like 2019 took a picture of a bunch of his friends like sitting on a balcony of this like hotel or something. And he was like showing his girlfriend a few years later and she's in the photo in the balcony above his friends. Crazy. Yeah. And it's just I go back and forth between believing in the universe having bigger plans for

us because I believe that people have autonomy. I don't believe in like Jesus take the wheel and the universe has plans for us. I feel like we have agency over our own lives and we can control. what happens. But like, there are just things that are like a little too crazy to explain. I think there's a mix of both. I think it's like we are in control of our own destiny, but the universe works with us. I mean, I certainly believe in a higher power and cosmic shit and all of that. You know, so I think it's both. Like, I don't think you have to be one or the other. I don't think you have to be like so woo-woo, like the universe and God's plan, you know, and just fly like float through the

world waiting for stuff to happen to you. And I don't think you have to be like, all that is bullshit. And I'm the only person in charge of my destiny. So I do think it's like a little bit of both and I believe in that stuff. And the stuff that I think is so crazy and I don't think I have any examples with my boyfriend. I would wonder if I have any with you is like when you did not know each other, but you were in the same place at the same time. Like that stuff is crazy.

Like that photo like you said, stuff like that is mind blowing and like so fun to be part of your story. I feel like my brother and sister-in-law had to have been in the same place at the same time. They're the same exact age and grade and they had the same friends in high school. Like they had to have. And she went to like this, I don't know, some kind of like frat formal with one of his best friends. And my brother used to go to Penn State all the time to visit them.

Like the fact that they didn't meet is so crazy. And it's just like the universe was like, you're not ready. Yes. Crazy. I know if I visualize it with my partner, it's like the universe literally holding us back till it's like the divine timing. Just he was sort of orbiting. Yeah. He was orbiting.

He never stopped orbiting. He took a few months off here and there. But it's so funny because I asked him because he would flirt with me in my DMs. Just, you know, sporadically. nothing too aggressive for years. And I always had thought like when I went to Boston in 2022 and did my camel toe tour, I kind of had another thing with a guy in Boston that I was hoping to see and I didn't end up seeing him. So Sparkle Eyes was not on my radar. This other guy kind of was, he was kind of occupying my mind. But I always thought it was weird. He never

reached out because he had this crush on me. And so I'm always like, do you remember why you didn't you must have seen I was there? You used to always watch my stories. Like I posted up going to Boston. and I had two sold-out shows in Boston. I was there doing it. Like, I'm wondering why you never said anything to me. And I was like, you must have just been dating somebody at the time. Like he was like, I don't really remember, like, maybe or maybe I just wasn't on social that week.

And I was like, uh, likely story. But like, I just always thought that was weird. I was like, I always knew this guy in Boston had this crush on me and, you know, light crush. This wasn't like some weird obsession. But he'd usually be in the DMs. And just for whatever reason, that wasn't the right time. He must have been dating somebody.

That's what I thought. I mean, we've talked about the live shows. But like, the reason you connected initially was I think I chose. or you chose, I chose this email to read at the show and it was about him. And we get thousands of emails. Yeah. Could have just gone in the trash. I know.

And that would be that. Yeah. Crazy. Anyways, I think it's interesting. I think it's just like a fun game to play with your partner to be like, did we ever meet in a past moment? Yeah. Like have our paths crossed.

Yeah, I think it's really cute. I like the fun anecdotes about Taylor and Travis. Like our friend Christina ZS, who is the confident collective. She's like an influencer personality. she interviewed Travis with the original Fuck Mary Kill They did like kiss Mary Something PG yeah

It was something like We never do it Saver work but she says Taylor Swift Ariana Grande Katie Perry Kill Mary Kiss That's messed up I don't want to kill any of them

Well you know It's just the game So she just says POV your interview influenced Taylor Swift's new song so high school where Taylor like references that interview but like that's such a funny thing. It's insane. How old that interview is so old.

He doesn't even look like he does now. Like he looks so funny. I know. So it was so funny the way these things happened. Like they had been on each other's radar. I know. And like obviously probably cross past. So anyway, I love to talk about it.

I wonder which amazing, funny, hot, tall, bald guys red stringed to me. I know. Is it red or invisible? It's the invisible string, but it's a red. string. Things that are invisible going to have a color. The way Tessa

looked so. Tessa did that guy's meme face that's like, that blonde guy that's always like, that was her face just now. Is it red or, are you thinking of

it's always sunny with the red string? No, it's an invisible red thread connects us all. It's a red, but if it's invisible. It's invisible string theory. But if it's invisible, how's it red?

It could be any color. You don't know. It's invisible. All right, guys. I feel like nobody believes me, in the comments. This is what I saw on the internet. Okay.

Yeah, no. I mean, things are invisible can have a color. Like, there's people that are invisible. They have a color. What in the world was that sentence? That was crazy. Okay, like in Harry Potter, he puts his cloak on, and then he's invisible. But he still has, like, skin color and clothing color.

He's just invisible. You can't see it. All right, guys. So I'm going to tell you about article. No. Okay. Anything else? No.

Ms. Swift? We'll be back next week. All right, guys. Yeah. Come back next week for more of Raina's string-related theories. Okay, so excited to tell you guys about Article. You know how much we love this brand.

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I love buclae. Some of their bed frames. I mean, you have your bar stools and your dining sets and ottomans and poofs. Oh, I have the ottoman outside too. I literally, like, can't even keep track. I have so much article stuff in and around my home that we're just such fans of it. Delightful design for every home online only. So they have some really delightful prices too.

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automatically be applied at checkout. That's article.com slash gge for $50 off your first purchase of $100 or more. And let's get into it. All right, guys, we are so excited to welcome our guest today. She is a content creator, media personality, entrepreneur. She is best known as the CEO of her brand. Let's fucking date. She is a wildly effective relationship coach, guru. You've seen her Forbes 30 under 30, Business Insider L, Cosmopolitan, and more. Please welcome to the show, Serena Carrigan. Thank you so much. Serena fucking Carrigan. Yeah, I fucked it up. Please welcome to the show, Serena fucking Carrigan. Let's fucking go. I love it. Can I have the story behind all of that, or can you show the story with our listeners? Like, is it just part of your brand

with the let's fucking date, let's fucking go, and then Serena fucking care again? No, it started way before that. Okay, tell us. And I just figured out how to turn into a fucking empire. Yeah. Basically, I was 18 and like I got to Duke as a freshman and everyone was hot, smart and cool. And I was like, fuck, like, what am I supposed to do? Like, I don't know how to keep. Like, I just didn't know.

And I was like, this is a perfect time to read about myself and like be, just channel this like bad bitch. And so I literally lied to everyone. I was like, I changed my mind to fucking when I was 18. And they believed me, which is crazy because like they got a lot. into Duke, but whatever. And it worked. I started becoming S-F-K, and then I really turned that

into a brand. But it was really just like this bad bitch persona that I just would use to make myself feel confident. I love that. That's incredible. It's very funny because one time someone came up to Raina on the street and said, Raina fucking Greenberg. And they probably even pulled it from you. They're probably a fan of you, but now my boyfriend calls

their RFG. And it's like just we're not taking it. We know it's your thing. It was a funny thing. And then I just love that people refer to you like that. Someone on our Instagram story was like, please tell me it's the collab with SFK. Yeah. Like when we teased it. So I love it. You were like in high school where you like this and confident or people were like, who has she become? Like you reinvented in college? I think that like I, we all are born with confidence. I definitely think I've always been very

extroverted. I'm an only child. Like I've, you know, I make everything about me. So like for sure, that's always been a thing. But I think that like as I got older, definitely in high school, I based so much of myself worth on like guys and getting with them and attention from them like many of us do. And so becoming S of K was about trying to like feel validation from myself and get it for myself and not as much men, even though I still fuck so many guys in college. But it is what it's that's what you're supposed to do. Yeah. It's like, you know, it's when you lose track. I mean, so many people anchor all their self-confidence in what the opposite sex or if you're attracted to the same sex think of them. Yeah. That's it. That's the bar. Totally. But like it's just that's our baseline.

I don't know. That's our conditioning. Yeah. So it's hard to reprogram and also still find that balance between. Yeah, I want people to be attracted to me, but I need my confidence to come from within too. The irony, too, is that this persona was like so, I'm a freaking carrigan and like so loud

that it actually like deterred men. Like I think that guys felt like very intimidated by it. Let's talk about it. Let's talk about him. And so then I was just like, oh, like what do I do? And I think that SFK eventually just led me to feel more confident myself. Like when I came in here today, I wasn't like, I'm straight enough fucking

care of and I would have done that before, you know. Oh, really? Interesting. Oh, yeah. So you've self-edited me. I put on my resume. I like, I put it everywhere. I literally was like, I'm starting a fucking carrigan. Like, that's what it was. And I think sometimes that can be a little abrasive, but it was my reminder myself that like, I'm a fucking legend. Yeah. That's it. So, and it were Waldorf of you. So the way that you, like, speak about yourself, I love it. But did you train for that? Like, did you just kind of start saying that until you believed it? A hundred percent. I really think confidence the way you get it. And people are like, until you make it, but I don't like that because you're literally born with confidence.

It's just like, then we grow up and then get infected and we're like, what the fuck? Totally. Like kids are confident. You're like, you're like, you're pushed when you're a kid and you're like, whatever. Until someone like makes fun of you and tells you you're not perfect. Yeah. Exactly. So I don't really love the fake until you make it because you're just really just accessing something inside of you that you already have. And so I feel like when I changed my mill into fucking legally or not, it was really just hyping myself up. It's a conversation I'm having with myself. Like you're Serena fucking Kerrigan. Like you are like the way that I would talk to my best friend. The way that you, the way that you

you guys probably talk to each other. Like you're constantly lifting each other up, but you're not doing that with yourself. So that's when I was like, wait, if I just start talking to myself, like, I'm my best friend and like the biggest hype woman, then eventually I'll become a bad fucking bitch. I love it. And I think that like, we're so mean to ourselves. We would never see this thing that we say about ourselves to our friends. When I've gotten ghosted, like my immediate reaction would be like, what did I do? Like, oh my God, I'm, I shouldn't have done this. I shouldn't have fucked him. I shouldn't want to. And then it's like, no, like, if my best friend said that, I would never say that to her. I'd be like, fuck that guy. Like, thank God he's out of your life.

Totally. So. It's a very simple rewiring. It definitely like intimidated some people. I think like, you know, just a woman in general taking up space and like being like I'm Serena fucking Karegan. Some people do not like that. Easy way to filter them out. A hundred percent. Great way to filter them out, actually. Everybody should just do that and see who bites. Literally. I like this for early stages of dating too. I think people just really, I do. I get really in my head. Are they going to like me? Is the conversation going to be good? It's going to be fun. They're going to think I'm hot. It's just, it helps lower the stakes a little bit. I'm Raina fucking Greenberg. You're going to love me. And also confidence is so. I'm so. I'm really. I'm really. I'm really. I'm really. I'm really. And also confidence is so. I'm so. I'm not. I'm. And also confidence is so. I'm hot. Like, period. Right. You just need someone who's on your, like, who can handle. Not, I don't like the word handle it. It's just, like, when I met my boyfriend, I was completely myself. I was S.fK. and Serena. Like, they're kind of two. It's not like multiple personality disorder, but it's close. Yeah. You want to find, so this guy said like, I'm learning to like, tolerate the way that you are essentially. And I was like, I don't want. No, no, no, no, no.

This is not tolerated. Yeah. Yeah. We don't want somebody that's going to tolerate how much you are. But we want somebody to be like, that's my fucking girl. Look at her go. No, like, you want it to be. You want it to be. That's, that's, that's why they like you. Not that they're just putting up with it. Like when the fact that my boyfriend, the first thing he saw was like us doing like a virtual live show. I'm like, yeah. If you saw that, then you, Rain and I talking about whatever. We had a blue dildo we were swinging around. Just being our full selves and you were attracted to that. That's all I need to know. Like literally, so I met my boyfriend on his podcast. And I was a guest on it really random, didn't know anything

about him. I literally DM me and I was like, yeah, I'd reach out to my publicist. It was very much like that. Talk to my people. Talk to my people. And he did. Talk to my people. And he did. Talk to my people. And he did. And I show up and six minutes in, I'm talking this exact conversation. I'm like, I'm just too much. Like for guys.

Like I don't. Because I was really trying to unpack that with him because I was like, you're a guy. Let's talk about it. Oh, really? And he's like, well, for the right guy, you'll be the perfect amount. And I literally go, are you hitting on me? I'm down. Like that was the lie.

He wasn't even hitting on me. But I was just like, that was the, it just was so nice. Like I felt understood because he's right. For the right person, the blue dildo won't be a fucking problem. album. That'll be amazing. Ashley, the clip is so crazy. You have to watch it. She said it. Yes. I mean, I got really into this. I went on

a rabbit hole. Yeah, she's very into your relationship. She says, I'm going to be in a relationship for the next two years. And he goes, how are you going to meet the guy? I have full body chills. And I was asking her before we started recording, like, did you know in that moment that you would like just met somebody? Like, did you feel that? I think I definitely, I remember walking out my public assistant. I was like, that was crazy, right? That was weird. Like, that's what I said. But I was just like, that was something that was energy in that room.

Something just happened. Something just happened. Did it start soon after? Literally like that day I texted him being like I had such a great time. Thanks so much for having me. Which I obviously, like I'll do it for you guys after this. But I typically don't do that. I give him the signal.

I give him the signal. I think he would have texted me or else, but I gave him the signal and he was like would love to continue a dinner without like cameras and makes. And literally from that date we were official three weeks later. I love it. Like it was just that also like we always say like it should feel easy. It shouldn't feel so hard. I never screenshoted a text.

By the way, I cannot believe how. I apologize to all the men I dated before my boyfriend because you were just dating me. You were dating like my entire friend. My therapist, my mom. Like I would just screenshot, like set it to random people. I hadn't spent two years being what do you think you should say to Brad? Yeah. Like, no, you know what I mean?

And with my boyfriend, it was like, it's like no screenshot, nothing. It was just all from just a flow. It should flow. I love that. You don't have to like decipher the messaging. Also, everybody that I date and fuck is also dating and fucking Ashley. I mean, that would be crazy. Okay, that's fine.

Yeah. Like, someone tells me a secret. Like, they tell it to just me and they're like, this stays between you, me and Raina. You know, like, they know. But I just, I love that that's like also like a measure of it. Like, I never had a screenshot anything and say, like, what does this mean? So what do you think? I know he's a little younger.

Yeah. Okay. Would you have a six year age gap? Which is funny because our parents do too. So my parents and his parents do too. They both divorce, but I feel good about us. I don't think that the age had to do with their divorces. Yeah.

Well, I relate to you. I have an age gap too. I'm older. But what would you say about him that makes it work? Like with him, is it just the confidence and security that he has innately that makes him a good match for someone like you? Yeah, I think that he was primarily like really raised by his mom. He's European. Right.

So strong women or strong women. She's French. He's bilingual. We have a lot of similarities. Weird crossovers. We're both only children. We both grew up in New York City. We both have foreign moms.

We're both bilingual. There's more. But he's very emotionally intelligent and mature. I really see the relationship with his mom. And, like, it's so obvious. She really raised him well. And just, like, he's very intuitive. And I just, I remember, like, when I was dating, like, if you looked at, like, my

hind, rye or whatever, like, all my preferences were like, I don't even think my age. I think, like, a year older than me and then, like, to 35 or 40. Isn't that crazy? You would have filtered him out? I would have a hundred percent filter amount. Never matter. I felt the exact same way. When I had set, I'm, like, 10 years older than you, but I was setting to, like, I dated

young guys in the past. I set my filters to, like, you know, 38 plus, like, 40. I went to never. And then, you know, wouldn't have found them. What's the age got for you and your boyfriend? Seven years. Okay, so basically the same. And you're older, too.

Okay, Slay. Yeah. Also, you guys, I had texted like I was younger than me two yesterday. Just two years. You know what? Do not appropriate our culture. Do not appropriate our culture. If it's not five years, get out of here.

My last boyfriend who I also met on a podcast was younger than me. By like a year or two. Right. It has to be like a, it has to be like a. Yeah. Anyway, Serena. I love it. You're a part of it.

It's okay. Remy thinks it's funny. He was just coughing. Yeah. There's a chuckle. Was it a real laugh? Thank you. You guys, just so you know,

Remy, how old are you? Remy, you want to... 27? I'm gonna date Remy. You could be in the club. I'm gonna get 11 year age difference.

She beats us both. Losers. Okay, sorry. Okay. No, no, no, no. Like, I just feel like I was very judgmental. Like, I was like, there's no way. Like, because a lot of women and people would tell me,

like, you should definitely date older because they will handle your success, handle, right? Like, the tolerate your success. And it's definitely an upbringing thing. I think it's a generational thing. Like, I think Gen Z, they are programmed differently. And, like, not all of them, I guess, that's, like, a massive generalization. I just feel like, I don't know, he's so much more mature than any guy I've ever dated.

When you say a program differently, like, I always feel like, you know, my generation, our generation, my nationally is like, women were raised to, like, go have jobs and be successful. But, like, we didn't at the same time tell men at that age to, like, seek out women that are really successful and powerful. And maybe now we are sort of correcting with like Gen Z. I also think me too happened when he was in college. So like a lot of the guys that I did it from Duke, like me too happened way after. And like I don't know. I just like that was a very big moment in our culture where it's like you have to respect women. Like that da-da-da. You know what I mean? Or else. Or else. Like there are consequences which sorry, but like it changed everything. I mean,

not everything. Obviously there's a lot more to do. But it definitely there was a turning point. Right. And I think that as you're developing, you're growing up, you're aware, they're just aware. So, yeah, I agree with you fully. I mean, the mom thing is really important. And this isn't like a rule across the board. But the only men that have been into me have like a strong working mom. Yep. This isn't to say that some man that had like a stay-in-home mom that was just kind of like

submissive to the father, maybe wouldn't have worked with me. But it's just like that's a common threat I found that there has been like a respect for a woman doing her thing working in charge that makes it. know. And that stuff is like, you know, programmed when you're young. We had somebody on the show recently. Tyler Cameron was saying, like, I would like a woman who like stays home and raises the kids and doesn't work. But he said I, that's how I was raised. And my mom, I respect her so much. And she was the best mom in the world. So that's what you kind of seek out what you've seen before. A hundred percent. Yeah. People kind of took it and ran with it. But I was like,

you at least can understand how he got there, right? You know what I mean? It's like his mom was on such a pedestal. Some people really just want to, you know, fuck their moms. So fuck their mom. You want to fuck their mom. To have what they had, you know. So I have a question for you. Okay. So during COVID, and this is probably old news, but I want to talk about it. You wanted 50 online dates. No, no, no. I did 50 men. I did it went on way more than 50 online dates. There were 50 men. And there were multiple days. Obviously. For me, I go on like three dates. And I'm like, where is he? I go on like three dates. I'm like, where is he? Like, exactly discouragellation of that. Scene. Let's fucking date. I quit my job two weeks before COVID. And I was in my life. I was in my life. I'm in my life. I'm in dating. I was in my life. I was in my life. I was in my life. I was in my life. I was in my life. I was in my life. I was in my life. I was in my life. I was in my life. I was. I was. I was in my. I was. living room. Lockdown happens. And I'm like, I'm single, jobless. What the fuck am I going to do? And I started going live on Instagram a lot. I love going live. And then I started talking about dating. And then I just had this idea where like I got set up on a blind date. And like I had a friend kind of vet them. And it literally no one was doing anything during COVID on a Friday night.

So everyone tuned in that followed me. And then just like it got bigger. I hired a producer. And then I turned it into like a full blown TV show. Three seasons, sponsors, bumble bought like a month worth of episodes and I dated 50 men. Live? Live on Instagram live. So like every Friday I do two back to back 30 minute dates and an hour after show where I met all my fans and to talk about the dates. Also where the fuck were you guys?

No, I'm upset. No, literally. I want to go back. I have, you know, I want COVID all the time. Raina was a big COVID fan. Not for the whole, not for you guys. You know what I mean. The lockdown part of it.

Yeah, I agree because we were so focused. Right? Is that what you guys? I was. I just didn't have no expectations or showering. Like I hate showering. I just didn't have to go anywhere. I was fucking my neighbor upstairs.

It was convenient. So I was fucking my neighbor too, but then he got COVID. That's why I started the dating show. He's fine. Like, he was a dick, so I don't even care. But like, I was like, the neighbor died. No. So I just, I'm upset.

I didn't know about this. Like, I guess I found you right after that. But like, I would have been watched. I was with my mom, my dad for three months on their farm in Delaware. But like, we would have watched a lot of families. They would put it on their Apple TV. Yes, exactly. Like, you would just put it on your TV.

Like, we did a few really fun, like lives, like live show. Yeah. like had people. It was really fun. But anyway, it was a turbulent time. Do you look back? You're like, what the fuck? No, I literally am so glad that I like got my, like, I did that.

I launched the car games. I launched a whole brand out of it. Absolutely. I monetized it. And like I built an audience in community. And like to this day, the people that come up to me are the ones are like, you got me through COVID. Like you got like that dating show like created such a community.

Totally. Isn't that incredible? And I think some people were like, what's my passion? What's my next thing? What's my dream? And like you just did one day of something you liked and you like talking about. And it turned into a huge company. But that's the thing. It's like, I think we put on way too much pressure on ourselves to find the perfect product or side hustle or business. And it's like, just start simple. Like what's one. I was like, I would like going life and I would like to go on a date. And I just, I just did it once. And then I was like, oh, people like this. And then it was again and again and again. And again. And again. And then I turned into again and again. And I'm like, how did you push through that without being like, I can't do this anymore? 50? Well, because I fucking loved it. Everyone had been previously like, COVID. Like, like, they told me to go on the bachelor. I'd be like fucking amazing. I know. I was like, like, I'm not. I was like, like, I'm not. I'm not. I was like, I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm. I was like, I

competing for a man. Like, I'm the star of the show. Totally. So I created Let's Fucking date. And I was like the producer star, everything. So created it as in like the motivation was helping other people get through. It was to find a man to get my bag and to also like, yeah, to have a party. Like I was like no one is doing anything on Friday nights during lockdown. So it was just like a fun. And we were all kind of like doing some weird shit. Oh, no. The card game was like it was like a first date, but it was a TV show essentially just on Instagram live.

I couldn't be like, so where'd you go to school? Like it had to be. right from the beginning icebreaker good because we had 30 minutes. Yeah. And if they advanced, it would be called second fucking gate. And then, like, we would do, like, an hour-long, like, activities. We did, like, paint-by numbers. Or one guy sent me a sushi-making kit, which smelled fucking disgusting. I hated it.

But, like, shit like that. How are you meeting the guys? How do we find it? They're all blind. So it was, like, date at s-fk.com. And, like, you would, like, send an email or something. And, like, a head of producer who actually had worked at MTV, like, literally vetting. I did so much experience with unscripted in reality.

So we had, like, villains. We, like, casted really well. A lot of Ex-Batcher people. Harry Jazzy's roommates was like Harry came in. Like it was just like really fucking rogue. A guy with an Emmy who was like there was just like really one guy was on a boat. No, no, no. You don't know.

No, I like hate this because I also feel like we would have submitted some people. No, no, you guys literally hit the shit. I was thinking of guys who would have, you wouldn't have stars of the after show. But so anyway, so I literally created the card game because so many people were like, these questions are great. Like I need help dating. And I think, you know, communication is everything. And so I was like, what's a way for me to be on every day without actually being there?

And so I just created the card game. And these are questions to like ask on the first, day, second, day, third day. I mean, whenever. Right. But. So what came first? Let's fucking date was the first card game.

Yeah. And Les fucking Foxxor. You tell your story. Yeah. Then fuck. X rated. Or reseller, obviously. Yeah.

And then let's fucking play self love. You could basically play alone. It's like self love masturbation vibes. It's a very intimate one. It's great for a partner as well. And then let's fucking go is our newest one, which I just gave you guys. And that's like, the platonic ones. Your golden ticket to going out.

If you're like anywhere like a weird influencer dinner or or like you're with your cousins and that you hate play that game. Amazing. I love it. One of our girlfriends, Hannah, I was like driving with her. I told her we were having you on. She goes, oh my God, her card game, let's fucking fuck. She's like, I do it on every date.

I love it. She was, let's fucking fuck on every day. She did less fucking fuck. On the first date. The first day. I was a secret of Pinky side. She is always surprising me. You never know what she's going to do.

There's been proposals from this game. Like this couple asked me to officiate. Like, I'm not sure if it was a joke. I would have been down. But anyway, bed's been broken. Like I love it I'll die in the hill for the game I really will

There's kids from it Literally there's a generation There's a generation There's less fucking fuck you fuck kids out there Literally There's all generate That's not a generation That's the next generation

So if people don't know I mean we know the game But can you give us a few sample questions Of like let's fucking date Let's do it You got it Here do you want this Yeah so there's four bases

First base second base third base Home fucking run So the higher the base The higher the base the hotter the question Oh okay So you can kind of vet it With depending on how you feel What the person

Your comfort level Totally you can take some out Right. So I'll do like a third base question. What would your ex say about you? Ooh, which is kind of fun. I love that. I love to hug you. Like early on, I like to get out of the way. I just like to know that you are capable of being in a relationship. Are you still hung up on somebody? Like if somebody's like my ex is such a bitch, you know, crazy, I'm like, what did you do? What have you done to create that? You know? I just, I got to know immediately. For me, when I found out that my boyfriend was younger than me, I didn't find out until after the podcast, I told her date. Like, I didn't look him up. Right. Right. Didn't even, he was so mature. I didn't even like, I don't know. It just didn't. He was obviously probably evading it, but like I just like didn't even.

And then I googled and it was like recent college grad. And I was like, recent college grad. Sorry, what? And I literally remember like there's a photo of me like on our date. I'm just like I'm fuming. Like I'm literally so mad because I don't know. Like I felt like, oh, am I the older woman? Is this like some kind of fetish?

It's like, you know. And I remember saying like, am I the older woman? Like what's like the vibe here? What's that movie that's super famous where like it's. super old. Oh, um, you know, the graduate? Robinson. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Hey, this is Robinson. Oh, that's exactly right. The graduate. So you're like, at my Stifler's mom? Literally. Yeah. Like, what's the vibe? And he was like, know, like, a lot of my exes, exes have been older. Like, I just always been like into older

women. And I was like, okay. I like men like that. I'm a maturedly thing. It is. Yeah. Totally. I, well, it's so hot right now. Kristen Cadillary and Montana Boys. Did you see the Ann Hathaway movie? Oh, yeah. It's our favorite book, also. The idea of you. Which in the, guys, it's, it's, it's trending for word. It's our... You inspired me. Like, I'm going on a date with the young guys. Like, why not?

It's, okay. Reming, you and me can inspire people. Yeah, obsessed. What if, are you single? Are you, are you straight? I don't know. You can never tell. It's in the card game.

She pulled that question from the game. That's the first question. Are you single? Do you like my gender? We're not getting an answer. The fact that the first question would be, are you single? Is there anyone out there that might call you their part?

That's actually true. I actually maybe should throw it in a manner. That's funny. Well, what's the meme that went viral was, is anyone under the impression that you're in a relationship with you? Yeah. That's good. Yeah. Rimey, what are you looking for?

Are you single? Remy's the producer of the show, by the way. Chronically single. Do you like women? Yeah. Ayo. Raina is on one. She's been so horny.

This whole truth. Okay. Can I just do a couple more? Okay. I just want people to hear some others. What would be the name of your porno? Oh, I love that. Love?

these are so fun they're really good well it'll be the name of yours do you know it I don't even know girl I feel like I don't want to fuck this one up like I want to think of okay mine would be fucking Serena Kerrigan oh right okay like the name of your

if you would like a sex tape yeah okay what do you think you want I don't know I was thinking it's like an opera like I'm a little hungover I was having sex till 4 in the morning I kind of forgot the name I said once time you had sex which is a question I love that yeah I feel like you

if you're on a day of the guy like or whoever you might want to know it might be too much you might want to take it out it depends the vibes it depends but i some guy asked me he was like so are you dating other people and i was like are you are you dating other people yeah i was like i'm i was like we're talking about you feel like he wanted yeah do you feel like you want to ask you because he wanted to tell you yes that's exactly how i don't like i don't like i thought he wanted me to just be open to the fact that he is going to keep doing that i was like i don't even like you it's been an hour anyway too yeah okay let's do another one okay what was your first impression of me that's such a good one right it's like uh

I want to share. I love that. It's not good. No, that's a great question. You can say it at me. Oh, to you? I was like, she looks so cute today. That was my first in my first.

Oh, my, that's so great. You look like so small and pretty. Oh, my God. Like, you know, people are like, you she's, okay, I love. You have a huge personality. So I'm short in real life. Yeah. Yeah.

Or just, you know, you're like short and you're petite. And so it's like, so is rain. Like, I just, I think people with big personalities, I just, they give us all our energy. You're so little. I know. They just say I thought you'd be taller. Yeah. But you came in with like a good energy.

But then we immediately started talking about horoscopes, which I just think is so funny, like just right out of the gate. Like someone mentions a boyfriend, you're like, what's a sign? Yeah, like immediately. Yeah, like, and you said that you didn't want to know your boyfriend's sign. You weren't sure. No, I know his sign, but I don't want to do the compatibility thing. I feel like it's going to get into my head.

Can you just say yours and say his? Because everyone's going to want to know. Yeah. So I'm an Aries Cancer Cancer Cancer. He's in a couple. I don't want to say all of his. I'll say he's an Aquarius. Okay.

Is Arias Aquarius? Is that a good match? I think so. So like, what else could it, what could go wrong? Oh, yeah. How long did you guys wait to have sex? I waited until, so podcasts, then date one, two, three. He picked me up from the airport and yeah, we fucked that.

Do you have any thoughts about, like, waiting, not waiting? I think that I talked about this. I think that the first date is too soon. When you go into first date with something, you're just getting to know them. Like, I feel like sex is a language, it's intimacy. I think, I don't think that a guy will not want to continue dating you after the fact. That's what I asked my boyfriend. But like I feel it's just too soon.

For you. Too soon for me. I also feel like it's like then you start to overthink, should I have done it? Should I not? It just like it'll feel intuitively right when it's time. Yeah. And I also feel like it should be not special. I've fucked so many guys.

So like I'm not like one of those girls, right? But I just think like when I think about it, I remember the first time was obviously when we weren't going to have sex. Like he dropped me off. It's like a night. Yeah. Second night. I did invite him upstairs to my hallway and I like grind it on his dick.

And we were like making out and it was crazy. And then I was like, gotta go. Which is kind of crazy because I was fucked up. It was so hot. Yeah. And then the third time he picked me up from the airport. That's gonna do it. Yeah.

I was like, how old are you? And then I got over it. And then he like spontaneously like booked a hotel. Okay. And then we fucked. I love it. Do you think, so we had tinks on the show recently. She talked about box theory and I do think applies women to men.

But like, do you think you put him in the I want to date you box? And so you're like, I can wait for the sex for a couple dates. We think you can have sex as something. any time you want. But like, if you're like, this could be anything, then you fuck first date. Like, do you do the boxes for yourself? I totally agree with her theory. Okay. For me, like, yeah, if I didn't think it was going anywhere, then I also probably wouldn't have wanted to have a second. Yeah. I realized that before my boyfriend, I, the most of the sex that I had was really drunk. Yeah. I think, I mean, because it's probably a similar story to me. I was having sex for just, you know,

validation reasons. Like, I thought it was so cool, you know, when I was young in college. Not that, you know, whatever. No, throughout my 20s, too. Then it just changes and, yeah, throughout my 20s, too. It's like a little too close. Yeah. Like I'm like, who are you? You know what I mean? But that's as I got older. Like I was single throughout basically the entirety of my 20s.

Yeah. As I've gotten older, I'm just like, I've had so many sexual experiences. I just don't need to. I don't need to. I don't need to date and I don't like you. There's no part of me that's like, I'm like grossed out, but I'm like, I don't need to get naked with you. Ew.

Right, right. So, yeah. You want to build that. So no. I mean, like, if I wasn't into him on the first day, I don't think I would have want to fuck him. Yeah. I want to talk about doing it for the plot

because you talk about it a lot. And like what is doing it for the plot and what is it? So want to hear your thoughts on it and your theories. Do you ever the plot is about being the main fucking character. You're born to be and seeing your life as a movie. And realizing that every experience is just furthering you on the development and your journey of being who you are. And so doing it for the plot is just like living and taking risks and just taking

calculator risks. which we'll discuss what those are and I don't know I always just grew up like I started writing in like a diary it was a Juicy Couture diary and my dad like bid for me on eBay when I was really young like I'd say maybe 11 and I just like I wrote

my first kiss in there wrote about my first hand job that I gave it was like this How old were you? I was 12 Was it really? I was 12 yeah and then everyone Everyone at school was like Serena I would know

Do you see why? Do you see why? Yeah that's why right right You know what I mean? Totally. You're 12. People were making fun of your technique. No, literally. How the hell are you supposed to know?

That's weird if you know. So great. It's weird if you know what to do at 12. Also, he came. Like I would have been like that. But that's the same as a blow job. You're like, do I blow on it? No, literally.

Like you're like, yeah. It's really good point. Yeah. Hello. So, oh, so I was always been writing. Like, I've always just had the mentality of like one day it's going to be in the memoir. And I want to suck the juice out of what life has to offer. Like we're not, tomorrow isn't promised.

So I've always had that mentality. Yeah. So you do it for the story. I think that there's obviously like parameters you have to have, like jumping out of a window, probably not in the story. Like I don't think going back to your ex-boyfriend, it doesn't, I don't really know what purpose that serves. Yeah. Yes. Yeah. I think, of course. And, you know, everybody live your truth, live whatever story you want to live. But I think like you had a reel that we loved about that. It's like texting your ex, I guess. It's not really what I'm talking about here. Yeah. You know, like, don't be reckless. Also, it's all about like future forward. And I feel like totally. Going back, just stop looking.

I think we tend to like overthink and think about what we've done in the past and it makes this cringe. But it's like it's all learning. It's all growing. It's all pushing you forward. It's about future, you know. Yeah, exactly. So things are self-harming to you that like you're not going to feel good about tomorrow.

Not for the plan. Like reading Reddit, not for the Watt. Like literally like I didn't say Reddit. I honestly, as I said, I almost threw up. I'm so sorry. Could not pay me. No, no. Like nothing.

Like a friend of my, we're not even, you know what? We're not even giving it. No, I'm not doing it. That's not for the ball. No. Not in my plot. I do want to get it back to the plot stuff. But when did you launch your boyfriend on Instagram?

So we started dating three weeks after we met essentially. And I was really scared. I hadn't introduced him to my family or my friends. And I remember when he asked me to his girlfriend, we took shrooms. And I started sobbing, like, tweaking being like, oh, my God. Like, what did we just do? Like, I'm terrified. I'm terrified.

What? Really? Just of a relationship or the age? I think like I'd been single for five years. So like, it wasn't the age. I was the second that he was like, it's not a thing. Even to this day, like I talk about on social, like I make fun of it because I, you know. Totally.

Because there's nothing else. Like it's not a thing at all. So I just want to like put that out there. It's only thing if you make it a thing. And I think like girls message me and they're like, he's young. I'm like, just let it go. Like that. I think I genuinely was just like afraid of it's scary to jump into a relationship, but especially

it was one of the first decisions I realized I made in my life where he wasn't getting the validation from other people. Ironically enough. Like that was why I invented S. But it's like, I didn't have a friend be like, no, he's really cool. I literally was like, no, I like this person and like I want to be in a relationship with them and no one has met him, not even my mom, when I'm really close. That was really like a very scary thing. And he said to me, it was like, I feel like that's like a normal thing that you get to know someone and you want to date them and then you introduce them to be like, oh, yeah, maybe you're right. And then like from that point forward, it just like felt good and safe.

But I remember like this is one of those decisions where I really was like, I'm going to do this. And like, worst case scenario, we break up. Like what's the big deal? Yeah. You waited to introduce him to friends and family? Was that intentional or now? No. It just happened like that.

It was so vast. Yeah, totally. Exactly. I totally feel that. Like, it was just right. But then right after we did and everyone loved him because also, ultimately people also want to be, he's great, obviously, but people want he'd be happy. So, yeah.

Did you struggle at all with my brand and my personality is kind of like single woman killing it? Oh, to answer your first question, when did we announce on Instagram? Like in July. So we met in May. And I was terrified, too. I made the caption. Wait, that's what I did. May and July.

In 2020? Yeah. Oh my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Yeah. Of the podcast. What day was it?

We did the podcast May 8th. Okay. Our anniversary is, well, it's May 20th. But then, like, it's really close. Like, July was the, like, connected. Launch. Yeah. You guys are so similar there.

Yeah, the launch. Remney and I'll catch up. In the beginning, I was very nervous about talking about us online and sharing and what are people going to say about the age. But now that we're together for you, I'm like, I don't give a fuck. Like, we're so happy. Like, I don't care. Mm-hmm.

Like, it's also like this scary thing of like, what ideas are people going to introduce to me that I didn't even know about. And these are strangers on the internet. I don't know if that's relatable to everybody. But like, you know, you're just like, I want to be in this bubble and enjoy this. Well, I think that in general, it's relatable because I think that people just love to project their opinions onto you. Oh, my God. It doesn't matter if you're online or not. Like, people will say something to you and it's always a projection about their situation.

It's crazy. Sometimes we'll say, we'll get an email and it'll be just insulting us or saying these things and people have a problem with something we said, this and that. And if it's long enough, you get to the bottom. and you realize exactly why. It's so personal. Like, you've got to realize when things just have to do with you and people just don't.

They just project, project, project, like scream and shout out and say, mean things to you all over the internet. I mean, you know, whatever. We don't bring up the R word again. The R word. Or like, we get a lot of people saying, like, for the holidays, I'm really nervous.

People are going to ask me about relationship. Yeah. They say they're projecting their ideas of what's happiness onto you. And it's different than obviously trolls on the internet. But like, I think that we get in our heads of like, what am I going to say?

And it's like, that's that person's idea of happiness. You can say whatever you want about your life, your relationship, your job. Absolutely. And a lot of people must be, like, when's the right time to move in with my partner? And, like, is it too soon to be a fit? And I'm like, where are these ideas of timelines? And I don't know. I'm like, do what's right for you.

Like, if intuitively, if you feel good and safe, then like, don't worry about what other people. Like, don't tell people. Like, don't let them get in your head. Like, just like, carry on. Okay. So back to my question. Yeah. Did you struggle at all with, is this a soft brand?

Like, is this. I'm a single eye. Ashley says, actually says, it's a single eye. I used to want to be a single icon. I just was single our whole podcast until last year. So this feels different. It's so funny you say this because last night I had like a little cute event and I invited my community to come and three women literally completely different.

All said to me at different moments. It's amazing to see how much you've evolved. I've followed you for since 2019 or 2020 and like I love seeing how you've evolved and like how you've changed and how you've grown. And so to answer your question like it's just a. And I think it's actually cool, like, to be like, yeah, I was a fucking blackout single bitch. Like, I was like, I'm getting dick tonight. Like, I love that era.

Oh, my God. I had, like, crazy eyelashes, like short blonde bob. Like, I dated 15 amount of Instagram life. People saw, like, but I was like, you know what? I did it right. Like, I did it for like a decade of like just being that fucking crazy bitch. And so now I'm like, it's okay. Yeah.

We're evolving. We have to. We got to keep on. Absolutely. It's what I wanted. When I set out in 2023, it was like, this is year I'm doing this. I've decided and I did it and I feel like I manifested it but I just was curious what your story was how you felt about it. Isn't it so funny what people say you've changed? It's like yeah, well, you're

supposed to grow up and learn new things and be different. Actually, that's one of my favorite things that Tinks has said. She's just like if you look back at your old content or something and you don't cringe, like then you're not growing. And I was like, oh my God. I know. I watched my videos. I'm like, I cannot believe right without having it. It's not bad. It's just like cringe. Like it's just like it's a different version of me, but that's good. And it's good to put yourself out there and being embarrassed as a choice. Emily. So I'm not embarrassed. Just my little soul. And then the ultimate projection is now your boyfriend's your whole personality. Oh, you did a whole thing about this. It was very funny. Yeah.

I could pop off about this forever. That's not too much, but everyone's about see a comment about this about me. And I'm like, well, first of all, I have a dating podcast about dating sex and relationship. So that's the person I have sex with this date. It's my relationship. So, for five years, I've talked about the other guys. What am I supposed to do? This is my relationship. I also still run two companies. I still go on a girl's trip every fucking month. I still have all my things like, justify. No,

I know I don't, but it's just, it's so funny because it's like, we laugh. Also, if it was true, that would be okay too. Before they would get me that comment,

it was you don't even know what you're fucking talking about because you don't have a boyfriend. That's too. Yeah. Yeah. They'd be like, are you like, it's kind of,

it's cringe that you're like, and I literally was like, so then I get one and they like, nope, no, and I'm like, you can ever win. Yeah, so same people are upset when you're single

and then upset when you're in relationship. They think of the insult and they tailor it to whatever bothering them that they project on you. You're just upset that you're happy. Yeah. That's truly. That's the T.

Also, the idea that you've landed on one relationship and then you are qualified. It's all so crazy. That's why when he introduced me as a relationship guru, I was like, okay, like, slide. You know what I mean? Like, I don't see myself as that, but I definitely feel like I've learned things along the way. I think that we've overcomplicated dating and like, maybe because of texting and social media, but really, like, your body will tell you so much about how you feel about a certain person before you even like know it in your head. Like your nervous system like if you're feeling anxious,

I really look back and I'm like, wow, I didn't feel safe in so many of those like initial dating phases that I was in. And so like really pay attention. Like are you going on your notes app? Are you stalking them? Are you screenshoting texts? Are you constantly talking about them and like worrying and confused? Like should not be like that. Yeah. And some people are obviously more anxious people than others too. And even going back to the card game and the motivation behind it, I mean, people just have so much stress anxiety around dating in the first place and they don't want to do it. And so, I mean, do you get a lot of that from your community of like this just help me approach dating? Because at least I have topics locked and loaded, whether you bring the card game out with you or not. Some people are

like, I just bring it as like a little safety blanket. Just in case I got to have it. And I pulled it out on some days from like, I can't fucking do this. Problem is that my face is on the card. So it's like weird to like be like, like it's just like I can't. But absolutely, I think it is anxiety and using. However, I've gotten that response sometimes where it's like, no, like I just have anxious attachment. I'm like, but I think personally when you meet someone who you're aligned with who is right for you, they'll help you get through that. Yeah. Oh, I totally agree.

I mean just kind of like going on a date, people just have more social anxiety. Like going to meet a stranger is a lot easier for some type of people than others. Yeah. So it's just like when you think about it, Ray and I prefer to meet people in the wild and dating apps or not. Yeah, exactly. But it's still a necessary evil. a lot of people do it and we love that we have that luxury, but it's like, it's stressful. It's a stranger.

You know, we're a woman. You go meet a man in a bar. You know, it's just like, I'm just validating like the stress. So I think it puts a lot of pressure in like we're meeting because we thought each other were cute. Do we like each other? You know, in other cultures and other countries or before it's like you'd all hang out out of a friend's house and you'd all like it's not so pressure.

Do we like? It's like an interview. It feels like a little bit sometimes. It does. Also with the fact that like you go in with so many preconceived notions of who they are. I remember I had just so much anxiety like, have they see my TikTok, have they see my content. And I'd be like, please don't look. Like, I'd really stress me out. Uh-huh. I always forget what's happening on the other side of the table sometimes too. I think, like,

they should be nervous around me fully. They probably are. I interview people for a living. I'm a pretty decently good looking girl. Big titties. You should want to fuck me. I'm fun. And I never really, like, I'm anxious going into it, but I never think, like, they should be anxious about me. They probably are. Yeah. And you, like, forget that the person on the other side is also nervous in ages because I think we think like men are so confident they all have like undeserved confidence it makes no sense no they really do they're also nervous and I think I forget that too sometimes absolutely and I think so many people are like where do I meet people out in the wild like how do I do it and I think it's also just an energy thing like I said yes to Felix's podcast because

I just I remember I was doing it for the plot like I was just there was just things I was saying yes I was having that mentality of like fuck it for the plot like I'll do this random podcast it'll be It's a great podcast and he's successful at it, but it was just like he was a guy. I don't really go on guys, they don't really want to interview me, you know, guys. So it was just kind of one of those moments. So my advice would be say yes. Like try to go out with a friend that maybe you would normally like say yes to a party. Go places alone.

Like I mean, obviously safe. But like I feel like there's ways for you to have it happen spontaneously. You have to get out of your house. You do. You have to. And get out of your phone. Work somewhere. Yeah.

Go work by yourself. Coffee. Yeah. It's an invitation. I mean, every once in a while you do hear like a really wonderful success story from an app. Those totally exist. But like listen to the other stories. Do you know what I mean?

Because apps, we all know how to use them. We've had them, you know, whatever. And they're great. But like listen to other people's stories and to also just inspire you with what to do. You know, like, how did you meet this person? It's like, there's such a vast array of how people met. And it's like through this person, through some work thing at this event. Like party.

Yeah, exactly. I really never thought about that of like people are like, how do you meet people? It's like, ask 10 people how they met their partner. and see what you get back and then maybe do those things if you can start a podcast start a live version of the podcast start reading emails and invite him up COVID again COVID hits again just so I'm curious what you think about this because of what you just mentioned earlier but I feel like there's a thing about when you go on vacation or you're traveling that mentality of like so you just like don't give a fuck you're doing it for the pot like you're no pressure none at all that's why oh you always meet someone when you're not at home it's just the stakes are so low you're like I don't know maybe we'll fuck one time maybe we'll fuck one time maybe you're Maybe we'll get married. I don't know. It feels so nice.

This guy went out last night. I just walked up to him to a bar and I was like, you're cute. That's how I met him. But it's so true. Like, think of your environment. Like, you're not, your sexiest self sitting at home swiping. That's not happening. You're sexy as self when you're like, I'm a vacation, bitch.

You know, like, when you're alone, it's so funny how people are like, I'm scared to like eat alone or like drink alone at a bar or a restaurant because I'm like, when I ever see a woman alone in a bar or restaurant, I'm like, she's so hot. So, so confident. Like, oh. my God. I have to know what her deal is. Exactly. It's so cool. Yeah, that's so true, too. I never even thought, like,

a man or a woman, like, looking at her, like, I got to know what's going on there. It's because it's not, you don't see it every day. You don't. And it's also less intimidating for someone to come approach you. I remember I went out, like, when I was single with, like, 10 girls in the West Village at the Spaniard of all places. Of course. It's always the Spaniard. And I was

like, no guy is going to, we need a breakup. Like, we need to break up in groups. No, he's going to come if we're like 10 of us. You can't penetrate that group? No, there's no one. That's crazy. Like, The way we thought that was a move, I mean, yeah, of course, you'd still just get drunk and go with someone at two in the morning. But like, you'd get the fact that we would get ready. 10 girls. No, insane.

And intimidating outfits. So, you know, like full glam. And then go to the span. You're like, tonight's the night. And then you'd be like, this guy is really hot. And you turn around. Like, is he looking at me? Is he looking at me?

Is he literally not looking at. He's not. And your back is to him. Like, go to bar. By yourself in sweat pants. That's what I'll say. I'm like, okay, this whole like is not going to get you. you a motherfucking day. Like it's just like the bitch face like like no it's open body language like

like fuck me body language. Yeah. And then like smile. Yeah. I think a smile goes a long way and it's weird as fuck but I started practicing like on the street when I was single. Spiling me. Yeah. And like guys would stop me on the phone. I feel like this is what you do. I do. If you ever had an experience, okay, when you're walking around like on the street and you're looking at your own phone like your own Instagram story and you laugh at something and you look up and connect with a stranger on the street. Those guys were like, she just, I fucked me so hard. And it's an accident.

But you are really, you're smiley and you look inviting. I'm little. I don't. You're fucked tall than me. But you just, you keep saying when you're walking around the streets of New York, like people are just looking at you more. I think you're exuding that energy. And you don't really walk around with like a bitchy face.

Like, I guess some guys are out there just like, I want a stone cold bitch. But that's probably not going to be the guy that you want the first place. But it's my need. It goes such a long way. It's like what we talked about. Okay, so back in the Jane Austen era, like, in the olden days, like, women were obviously not allowed to, like, approach men. So they would drop a handkerchief if, like, they wanted the guy to, like, approach them. So it's like, you need to give a signal.

And the signal could be, hey, I think you're cute. What game is on? Like, the TV, you know, like a sport. Yeah. You got it. Okay. And that was the first time I've ever said that. What is basketball?

Like, literally, what is this sport? Or smile. Okay. Also, just like, I know it could feel awkward, but it's actually like, it goes such a long way. I think people are looking for a story. signal to, so I do intentional prolonged eye contact, not to the point that it's weird. I thought them. I thought them. You have to. You have to. You look at them and they're like, okay, I'm picking it up. She's into me. There's no stakes. I mean, think about it because the worst thing that you do is just turn around, walk away, like, not look at you.

I mean, I think, you know, we obviously lived here for a long time and people really just go, go, go on a mission. But I feel just generally happier, friendlier, smiler. So I just feel like anything that I've been doing recently, whether it's getting a coffee or shopping or whatever. like people are kind of they don't see it coming like I just think day to day and maybe in New work more people just aren't as naturally friendly and so I feel like I've been making more of a point to always be like hi how are you yeah you know just and people like oh my god like even a solo house they're being nice now I don't believe that I'm telling you you got to start it like like you so house is the top tier of no one's nice to you but I I'm extra nice because I want to be like you're gonna be fucking with them I just am like I want to have a nice interaction yeah and it like

works like you get the energy back that you give totally and then the same time like you know don't start no shit won't be no shit you start being rude to me it's gonna like like i just think it works with everybody like you get what you give absolutely and i feel like why men tend to like like dating apps is because they don't have to worry about getting rejected right like it's an ego thing so i think like if you can give them some kind of signal they can feel free to come up to you and do the work i think we're so scared of getting rejected everywhere all the time you know and it's so funny because Because when we talk about just smiling at someone, no one's going to be like, can you believe that girl? What a creep.

No, no. Like, it's the lowest stakes. That's what I'm saying, the lowest stakes. It is the lowest stakes. Like, no one's going to be like, that girl at the Spaniard. What a creep. She's smiling. The audacity.

Men, they're just looking for the window. They are. They are. They are. They are. The signal is so important, like you said. Like, I really do love that. How you sent your boyfriend that message.

Like, if you want to go full force, aggressive, ask somebody out that you can do that. But I think not everybody wants to do that. that and just giving that opening the door and letting them walk through it I think is so important like we talk about that with Jared and if you're struggling to get off the app and on the day you just tell someone when you're free let them make the plan great call it's a really good piece of advice and not like hey meet me at the stand here on Wednesday 8 p.m like you don't have to do that you know because I think there's so much extreme dating advice out there and it's just like most people are kind of in the middle yeah of normalcy totally face the room and smile should we do this game yeah okay we came for the

game for you. Oh my God. Called plot or not. Okay. I mean, we're doing this as a take this with the greatest song, but we basically crowdsourced our audience stuff they did for the plot. And probably most things will fall into that category, but we were just going to have you decide if it's plot or not or not. Okay. Okay. I fucked these two brothers. Plot. Oh my God. I did. I came close. I didn't fuck both of them, but I matched with both of them and then, yeah, love. Okay. So potty. Super ploddy. I fucked my ex's best friend after we broke up. depends. It's messy.

That's like, I mean, it's potty. A lot of people do it. I gotta know what the X did. Because, I mean, you know what I mean? Like, was this just really vindictive or? I mean, it's potty. Yeah.

Bitchy. You know, we should have done us ploddy or thotty. That's thawty. Okay, let's rename the game. Plot or thought. Plot not or thought. Oh my God, love. Great branding.

Okay. This is amazing. Plotty, thoughty or naughty? Okay. No. Oh, that's great. That's wrong over. Okay.

A lot of this, I flew to another country for a second date with a one-night bumble stand. Flew to another country. Fottie. Okay. And Thottie. Yeah. I once flew to Miami for a first date.

That was... Love it. A lot of that's this stuff. Just like I flew somewhere. It falls right into that plot category. Plotty Thottie. Okay. Hooked up with a guy in New York,

hooked up with his cousin in Miami and then knowingly hooked up with their friend. Plotty and Thottie and Therina. I was like, I submitted this one. Yeah, literally. Like, I was out of myself with the Miami thing. And so now I have to admit. Like, it's such a good story.

Like, it's fine. It is. I love this one. A man told me I had to say a prayer before we hooked up. I said that prayer. Plotty as fuck. That's amazing. I would have the story.

I'd have to know. No, because I'm saying that prayer. I'm saying that prayer. The story has to brunch tomorrow. Yes. I'm like, Rayna, I just said, God is grace over the sky's dick. Obsessed. I'd be like, let me just film this for Ashley because we're going to laugh about this later.

This is good. Oh, is this you? No, but I would. Absolutely. I've done way more for way less. Obsessed. I got that. He's going to tell us, like, you guys got to cut all that.

I'm at work. I fucked our audio video guy. It's where the podcast is recording. You're her tight. He's like, thawty. She loves A-V. Yeah. I fucked my boss.

I mean, I need more context, I think. You never know. Right. Depends, like, I feel like the problem, the thotty is just like it's slutchemy, which I'm not like, fuck your boss, like whatever. I just always, when people ask me, should I get with the co-cary, I get scared. I know you're trying to. to like do your thing with your producer but I literally

Matt him like two days ago I'm not the fact that you brought that right after it's so good I've been trying to fuck our video guys like three years like I like I like I just want it studio for the plot I don't know I just feel like don't shit where you eat like you need some separation okay so I should stop trying to sleep with our video guy maybe I'm two and a half unless you're gonna have a contractor he's a general he is a contractor exactly okay okay I'm boss you're not employed I am sort of his boss but also sometimes I try to jerk him off okay fucking your boss like if someone

message me and said should I fuck my boss for the plot I would say know okay yeah but once you've already done it i'm like well yeah do you differentiate between boss and co-worker i think co-worker is tough but like it's just tough like i don't really it's all context but like if you have to see them every day are you going to be okay right but like do you have to like you know what i'm saying like if the context was i'm really in love with this person we've have a great connection and i think this could be like the person for me it's like yeah well then of course but if you're like if you're just like just to do it or just to make it awkward for yourself later than no. I mean, you just need the...

Well, a lot of the questions are like, should I fuck this? Like, it's like a situation ship. It's not like a real life. Exactly. That's what I'm saying. Yeah. So it's just like, I don't know. Do you have to? But like I get why having like a crush at work is really fun. A work crush. So fun. Oh my God. There's nothing better. That's the only reason to go to work. Rain is like, I'm doing it right now.

That's why I come to the live shows to see Ryan. I'm talking about Remy. Oh. I can't. Ryan's like, can you stop this? His mom's like, I listen. Okay. My ex's new girlfriend added me on Facebook the day they became official. I accepted to spice up my life. My ex's new girlfriend added me on Facebook. Her ex-boyfriend became official with his new girlfriend. The girlfriend added the ex on Facebook. It sounds like that's hilarious. She should absolutely accept her life. She

absolutely should have accepted. I wonder with the new girlfriend was doing it for the plot too. Yeah. She was like, fuck it. That's so funny. I love that. Kissed five people in one night. Potty. And Thotty. Yeah. hooked up with the 21 year old, I am 35. Wow. Yeah. The idea of you. Potty.

That's potty. Yeah. Absolutely. And by the way, like, I don't know what we're assuming the genders are, but like with that, if it was a guy who's 35, you know, with the 21 year old, we wouldn't bat an eyelash. Sorry. Oh. Yeah. But it's also just like, that's everyone's legal here.

Yeah. Who cares? Right. Totally. Okay. We'll get an end of this. One on a trip within 20 hours of meeting a guy. Madam, straight to the trip.

A mushroom trip or like a plane trip. Plain trip. So they met and then they went on a show together immediately. Lottie, but like, find my friends. Yeah, be safe out there. Yeah. Didn't you go to the airport on a date one time? I did.

We went to the airport. That was the way of the day. My first date in New York City, we went to boot a bar for, he picked me up in his car. We did a lot of drugs. And he left the car and then we went to the airport. We were like, we had this great idea. We were going to go to the Caribbean. And we literally, we dropped his dog off at a friend's house.

Okay. It was like two 30 in the morning. And we went to the airport. We pulled up the airport and they were like, flights aren't flying out at this hour. Right. What time was it? It was in the middle of the night. Oh,

you didn't even chat. We'll get on the red eye. They're like, you guys are on drugs. You need to leave. Yeah. The back area comes out. Do you have like, do you pack a bag?

You definitely did it. No, I was just, I had the clothes on my back. To be fairly, I've always thought that it'd be kind of romantic and spontaneous. If it, yeah. But it's like, I'll pay for it. And then, but it's three in the morning.

Then what did you do? You went like awkwardly like back. We just went back. Oh, God. I like have the ick thinking about it. I know. We went to LaGuardia and then I just did a little quick trip to LaGuardia. No one's ever asked me this.

What happened after you got to the airport? It's so funny. You guys like share a car? What did you do? I'm crying. And also like I didn't have the kind of money back then that I was like, fuck it. I'll just buy something when we lay on. Like I have money for underpants and a dress.

Like what did I think was going to happen? I was totally just thinking that. Yeah. Did you have like a phone charger? Like what was the vibe? This is like black band eraser. A razor. A lot.

What phone? 15 years ago. Love the big room. If you guys would have slept in the airport, though, you're like, we'll take the first one out. No, that is where I draw the line. No, that's what I'm saying. You would have woken up.

So what happened? Did you even, like, speak again? Okay, so we did. I saw him one more time. He lived in New Jersey. He picked me up. He took me on a date to Outback Steakhouse. He picked me up in the upper east side.

Brought me back to New Jersey. He did one restaurant. He did one restaurant. He did one restaurant. Like, what? He was like, I'd love to get for a tour of the tri-state area. That's out a pocket. Yeah, he really was into the travel.

Raina, that's insane. That's just one spot. He's like, I have the whole city of Manhattan, but we got to go back to my special spot to get a bloomin onion. It was good. I remember liking that. You're in the car for an hour. I wish I was at LaGuardia.

I slept just house. I felt fully closed on top of the blankets. And I was just like, I got to get home. And that guy's married now and owns Jim's in New Jersey and voted for Trump. And I feel like I just, you know, the profile. Yeah. Early 20s dating. Because college is, you know, its own bubble.

Funny story. Amazing story. The stuff that I feel like I've shared with Raina and vice versa over our friendship. She's just like, what? Like, we're in business together? How did that happen? Like, we just, how do we survive it? That's how you know you're living life.

Exactly. Like, wait for my fucking memoir. Like, you're not. I can't wait. Okay, Serena, this is amazing. You guys are amazing. This is so much fun. You guys have to get these card games.

Bring it out a date and pull it out. Somebody thinks that's weird than they're fucking weird. I think you should do this to every single date. So where can everybody find everything that you do? Let'sFuckingdate.com and Sterena Carrigan across all platforms. What a treat. I want to see you guys live. Anytime.

I want to see you live. Yeah. You did live shows, right? We should do it. One night old. Oh, also, we have a sex toy for you. We brought you, Anna. What did we bring?

We brought her a reina and a blow gel. So we have oral enhancer flavored second blow gel. We peach right now. Oh my goodness. Anna. Guys, this is Anna. Incredible. I told you, my boyfriend said, when you come back from the podcast, we're going to fuck.

So. Right. I brought her the peach, the juicy peach. And the reina, which. is a double-ended vibrator. One end has a sucker and the other just vibrates. You can bend it. It's really fun. You can put on a whole show. I'm going to give a head tonight.

I know. I have to too. So we'll let's touch base in the morning. Okay, please. You guys, as someone who finished a blowjob at 3 o'clock in the morning last, you did not. And then I headed to LaGuardia. So good. Just to Ritiguardia. Off to LaGuardia, she goes. Remy, are you turned on?

All right, guys. Well, you know where to find us at Girls Got to Eat.com. Get tickets to the tour. Serena, she's going to be one of the shows. We'll get her there. and Girls' Gotti podcast on Instagram and TikTok. I'm Ash Hess. Rain is rana.

at Greenberg and then Vibesonly.com for all the goodies. And we'll see next week. Have a good week, guys. Bye.