Girls Gotta Eat - How to Fire Up Your Foreplay

Episode Date: October 10, 2022

We're talking about everything BUT sex this week, and how to spice it up in the bedroom sans penetration. We deep dive on kissing (what makes a good makeout, bad kissers, how and when to make the first move), then cover everything from sexy massages to hand jobs to lingerie, and share listener tips and "foreplay gone wrong" stories. Before the foreplay, we're discussing an unprecedented text Rayna sent to a guy, Ashley's wildest Covid test, and what to do (and say) when guys won't leave you alone. Enjoy! You can now watch our episodes on YouTube! Follow us on Instagram @girlsgottaeatpodcast, Ashley @ashhess, and Rayna @rayna.greenberg. Visit our website for tour dates, merchandise, and more. Shop Vibes Only. Thank you to our partners this week: Daily Harvest: Get up to $40 off your first box at dailyharvest.com/gge. Tushy: Get 10% off + free shipping hellotushy.com/gge. Nutrafol: Get $15 off your first month's subscription plus free shipping at nutrafol.com/gge. Rocket Money: Cancel your unnecessary subscriptions right now at rocketmoney.com/gge. It could save you hundreds a year. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

And then I got home and I could like still kind of smell him like on my upper lip. Some girls want to take your sweatshirt. Raina just wants you to linger on her upper lip. Another episode of Girls Gotta Eat. Welcome back. We're on YouTube. We're on YouTube. Welcome.

I don't know where to look. I don't either. It's been four and a half years. And we're just now getting on this huge plan. platform for podcasting. Never heard of it? Well, actually, listen, we did get on, hey, I'm Ashley. I'm Raina, and this is a comedy podcast about sex dating and relationships.

This is Azul. Oh, this is Azul. If you guys are watching, if you're listening, whatever, this is my dog. He is the house dog, the girl's got to eat mascot. Azul. He, well, you should watch YouTube and you should take a look if you don't know what he looks like, but he is a sweet little rescue. We've had him in our lives since April of 2020.

So anyway, this is the three of us. Girls got to eat. If you're new here, welcome. If you're hate watching, hate listening, welcome twice because you're listening twice. But we are so excited to do this because we've been doing clips, obviously, in the podcast for so many years and you guys have wanted to watch the full episodes. So that's available to you now. We're going to be releasing full episodes on YouTube from now on.

And it'll be available to you every week. Yeah. That's it. Okay. What else? Okay, so we announced our holiday show last week, and I would assume that it is sold out at this point in time. So we'll be to the Apollo Theater on December 15th,

and if you guys got tickets, thank you. And we might add another show. I don't know, we'll see. Yeah, we'll see. Stay tuned. And we will be announcing our 2020-tree tour coming soon. A few things just for me, if you want to come see me do stand-up, I have shows in Nashville that's almost sold out on November 10th

and Atlanta. November 13th. Get those tickets. Theater show. It's going to be so fun. It's going to be so wild. It's going to be such a blast. And I've done for a too, but that's been sold out for a minute now. So you can do that at my website, ashess.com. Yeah. And if you're new here, the website has every episode we've ever done. So you can search all the different titles, merch, things like that. So thank you for being here. You went back to your alma mater this weekend. Yeah. I did go, I went to Clemson for the I hadn't been that's where I went to school so I hadn't been there since 2015 and I've seen my group of girlfriends there's like seven from like the core group that were all

still friends like best friends from college and I'd seen them I've seen them over the years you've met all of them but we hadn't all been together on campus since 2012 so you know when we were just freshly graduated no but it was it was so good it was so perfect they all have children so they're The six of them, excluding me, they have 13 children. And they all, except for the one that has one daughter, all have a girl and a boy, which is so fun. Like, there's just such a good mix. And the kids, like, they vacation without me all the time.

Like, the kids all know each other. The kids play together. That's great. And the kids are all at an age that I really love. Like, the youngest one was four. And the most of the, I feel like say the median age is like six, seven. The oldest is nine. So it's fun.

I just, I loved it. I mean, there was a point where 2010. 15 maybe and we all got together for a baby shower and they all have like babies or really young kids and I was like I cannot relate to these people anymore like and I get it they're all like they're breastfeeding or they're pregnant or they have newborns or small children it's like all consuming and it would be for me too but I just felt like I knew that that that that would pass like I knew it would come to a point where like I loved being around their kids and I could talk to their kids and hang out with them and then they would be back to normal you know out of that early

infancy stage and so it was such a blast. I just, I like loved being around the kids. I think it's really nice because we talk about like friendships ebbing and flowing a lot in the show and people being in different life stages. And I had that life stage when I was like maybe 28, 29 when all my friends started to get pregnant with their first kids. And like the only thing they wanted to talk about was pregnancy and baby formulas, what they could put their kids in. I just couldn't relate. Like I just had nothing to contribute. And like it's nice to kind of start to be on the other side of that. Or you like you can hang out again. They can talk to you and not be with their kids. Like yeah. I just think it's like a good reminder that like friendships and like life stages of

yeah. Yes. And you can like really enjoy it on the other side of it. It just takes a little time. Yes. And none of them are like helicopter parents. They're all just super chill. They're all just like let their kids like run amok.

But the kids are all friends. Like the girls like four of the girls are the same age. Like I'm like, what if they all grow up and go to Clemson together and room together? Like I just loved watching it. It like really warmed my heart. It made me want to have kids. I'm kidding. It made me want to be an aunt so bad as you guys.

guys. Everyone's like, but no, I'm like so excited to be an aunt when that finally happens and like have the kid energy and just all of that. But Clemson is like truly the best place on earth. I mean, the games now, I mean, they have been for quite some time now with like the team is so good. The games are so hype. There's really nothing like it. There is no more hype. College football experience. And I'm so glad I got to be there and experience that. We thought we were going to have terrible weather. The weather like turned out to be perfect. the hurricane blew through and it was just it was awesome i felt really happy for you i'm really sad for me because it was really cold and really rainy here this weekend and i was like all she went i'm so happy

for her uh so yeah that was my that was my weekend and go tigers um and they won of course obviously they did so i have to read this thing that happened between us last night what it made me laugh so hard i just have to keep everybody abreast of this conversation so i said i have to show you something i was talking to so and so last night at this dinner i asked him to send me a pick of dog, he sent one, he was at home, and I asked you about something that was happening in the room. Because I just needed to understand it. And you wrote, hold on what? You asked for a picture of the dog. If you know this show, you know that Raina doesn't want to picture your dog. She hates to get a picture of a dog. It's a turn off to her. That you even have a dog. Probably. I'm kidding. No,

she likes dogs, allegedly. We're still unclear. I don't know if she's, line to everything. I like this dog. No, but you've literally said, I don't want pictures of your dog on this podcast, run the tape. Yes, I did. I did. And it made me, you just know me so well. It just made me laugh so hard because I was going to talk about something completely different and you were so shocked that I asked for a photo of the dog. And it shocked me so much that I had to go back and reread the text to make sure that that is what I had asked for. I was so drunk when he sent me the photo. I made you doubt yourself. Well, it made me be like, wait, did I really ask her?

So I went back and checked the receipt that I did, in fact, asked for a photo of the dog. Yeah. So this makes me think that you really like him. Out of character. He's going to turn you around, turn you into a dog person. We'll see. I'm not, again, I'm not a Zool dog person.

But yeah, we'll see. It just made me laugh so hard because I just didn't even think that you would like make a thing out of it. It was you just know me so well. That's an insane thing. Like, I'm trying to think of what will be comparable. Okay. Let's say I'm telling you about something, and I'm like, Raina, I was having sex with

this guy, and I asked him to call me a dirty whore. And then yada, yada, yada. And you would have to be like, back up. You did what? Like, it would be so out of character for me that you would stop the presses and have to get more information before commenting on what I was asking you about. Yeah. No, you're right.

That's exactly what I would do. I just, it was so out of character. I really did have to like go back and reread like what drunk me was doing. So it really made me laugh. But yeah, that's where we're at. I asked for a photo of a dog. Well, you were, so you were hungover yesterday and you were being so funny. I'm the funniest I'm hungover.

It's not sharp jokes. Like I'm not, there's no observational humor. I don't know. I might beg to differ because I'll tell the other joke. So you, I was in this. I just complain funny. That's what I do. But I would not say I see.

I'm not a sharp observer when I'm hung over. I don't know, Raina. I think this is where you thrive. Yes, she was the worst day of my life. Well, so I was in the airport lounge in Greenville, South Carolina. Greenville, Spartanburg Airport, favorite airport. It's teeny tiny. It's so clean, so nice.

Everybody's so nice and so southern. And it's like, nobody's there. It's the smallest airport I've ever flown in and out of, and I fucking love it. It's so easy. I mean, can you feel me on this? Well, you send me the photos. It was beautiful. there was a hot guy there.

The food looked amazing. It was empty. It was clean. Nobody's there. So I'm in the lounge and they just had like funny, seasonal spooky decor. And I like, I, we like that. I love spooky decoror. My brother decorates his house for every holiday, which is adorable.

And one time one of his friends told him that the aesthetic was spooky coastal. And spooky coastal is my favorite thing. So every time I see spooky decor, I love it. So there was like, I took a. picture of something for you. Oh, this guy. I was trying to figure out, I said he looked kind of short from the back of his head. We couldn't decide. Also, so he looked tall from to me at first, then he looked like my brother, who was very short. We made a huge mistake. He was tall and hot, and I should have went and sat by him. But it was fine, and I was wearing no makeup, and I looked

really tired. So you noticed in the corner of the photo, there was some little pumpkins, some little white pumpkins. And then I was like, I've got to show you the rest of the decor. The funniest, the decor was sitting on top of the food bar, and it was like a little wooden chotchkey with some skeletons, and it said, Bon Appetit. amazing. They got in some some some marshals

or marshals TJ Max and they had some other decor as well some like fall fall Halloween and I sent it to you and you said

that's what guys say to me right before I suck their dick and was that an original yeah it was an original of course I spelled out the word bone

I've never seen it before that's why it was funny it said bone appetit because it's the skeleton Yeah, I know, but I've never seen somebody spell out the word B-O-N-E. Well, because it was a play on.

I know. Okay. But yeah, yes, it's original. You're saying that trigger the joke. And also I was so hung over that it took me a while to remember how you spell bon appetit. I was like, is the E real or not? Like before I said the joke to you, I was like, is this funny? I think it's so funny that someone you would be about to suck a guy's dick and he would say bon

apatite. It's so fucking funny. If any guys are listening right now. And you know your girlfriend or your boyfriend is a girl's got to eat listener. Next time they go down there, they put their hair up. They get ready. Just say bon appetit and film it. I'm kidding.

I'm kidding. But let us know. I think it's funny to use like our blowjob gel to like squirt all over your dick and be like Bon Appetit. Yes. It really made me laugh. And yeah, I was so hungover. I was like, I don't even know if this is funny.

I'm still hungover today. This is a two-day hangover. Oh my gosh. This is the worst it's ever been. You know that Ashley and I are on our alcohol journey for like years. Now we cut back. I don't drink that much. And I definitely don't drink as much as I drank on Saturday night.

Holy shit. You know, I will say, like, I, like, barely drink now these days. Like, I got kind of drunk this one night in August. And before that, I hadn't been drunk since February. And it was kind of interesting to tailgate all day. And I had three drinks. I had a high noon earlier in the day. I had a beer at the tailgate, and I had a glass of red wine at night.

I just, I drank water. I just didn't. I can't last the whole day. We had a whole long day. It was a night game. I don't want to do it. And it's fine. Like live your truth.

Like I wish I could just drink like I used to and not get hung over and feel fine and look fine the next morning. But that's just not the case. And it makes a travel day even that more miserable. So that was an interesting thing on this alcohol journey for me was like and my friends don't drink like we used to too. We're not like running around, taking ripping shots, getting blackout drunk, going into the game, stumbling around.

Like nobody's getting like that. all their kids are with them. Like, it's just different. But I probably drank even at least of everybody. And I just, it's nice to wake up and like I went and got a coffee, went and saw my old house on campus. Like,

I just, I'm just done feeling hungover. Well, yeah, I, it's funny you brought up how you look. I do look really ugly if I have a couple drinks in the middle of the day. And I keep,

I mean, you know me, you've been with me where all of our friends are day drinking and I won't touch it because like, yeah, you just, Brandon does not day drink. I just,

I don't, and it's so annoying. People start heckling me. Like, just have one. And normally people just back off, of course. This is somebody's haggling you. That's crazy.

But I do start to like look really ugly. What it does in my face, like what it does under my eyes. And then my eyes get small and then the under the bags. And then it's like I get Botox my forehead. So I already have like a lowered situation. It's been getting worse where I wake up and I'm like, who is she? That alone is enough to deter me as of late. Me too.

I woke up on Pompuffy two days later. Okay. One more thing that happened that was so funny. yesterday. Okay. So you guys, we've been having to get so many COVID tests. And it's fine because it's for like TV appearances and various things. So we are, this will have already happened. But as of today, tomorrow we are recording a Drew Barrymore's podcast. So we're so excited. Whatever. We had to get COVID tested. But all these things still have COVID protocols in place. So our PR company said that they could send someone to do it in our home. Like they just come by,

they swab you, they leave. So my flight was delayed. So I was supposed to to get swabbed. Then I had to push it back till 6 p.m. So the nurse is like texting me. Like I'm swabbing you today. We had to reschedule. We had to go through the company. And so then she texts me if you're home any earlier, let me know I'm in the area. So I was like, okay. And so it was supposed to be at 6. As it turned out, I was like, I'm going to be home at 530. And she's like, okay. And then she said, I can do it before you even like go in the building. I was like, okay. Like I don't, what do you, what? So I pull out in the Uber. I have a Zool. I have a suitcase. I have carry-on bag and she rushes out of her car, catches me on the sidewalk. I have a dog with me and

luggage and just sticks it in my nose, swabs me. And she's like, sorry about the rush and runs off. Drive-by swabbing. 90 seconds, in and out. Two hot guys walked by on the street. They're probably like, what is going on here? Right. I've never in my life. I couldn't even kind of manage all the stuff I had going on with this animal and my luggage and trying to get in the door and the Uber's there. She's just like, do, do, do. That is the funny. You just like, stand there. Like, I couldn't recognize that woman in a lot, out of a lineup.

Like, it happened so quick. She was in and out. She texted me later. Sorry, girl, that was a little weird. I was like, yeah, girl. You guys are texting about the experience afterwards. She didn't give me an option. She came at me with that swab, went in and out of my nose and ran off in her corolla.

That's so funny. You're still holding the luggage. I told me to be like 60 seconds. And a dog. I wonder if the doorman were thinking, the people on the street. This is so crazy. I literally, as she swabbed my left nostril, I locked eyes with two hot guys walking by, which we don't see hot guys in the neighborhood that much anymore.

The neighborhood has changed. What did they think? I actually don't know. It sounds like a drug test. Like you're going to go pick up your kids or something and they won't let you into the building. Like without doing your drug test, like you got to see if mommy's drunk or on drugs. That's crazy. I was trying to think like how crazy it would be if I walked by and somebody was doing that on the street.

I'd be like, wow, they really got to get it in. And I was like, can you let that girl put her stuff down? Like, she wasn't willing to let me go in the building and set my stuff down. She was like, I'm in and out. Parking is tough. I got my flashers on. Should have flashes on. I respect this.

My girl had her boyfriend driver to my house. Okay. So this is something that we wanted to talk about inspired by, inspired by for life events. Like everything on this show. It's like all things we talk about on this show. So this is a true story. Okay. So I teased it last week.

Not like it's some like, you know, big deal. But this is something that I had two incidents back to back with guys that ultimately would not take a hint. We're having conversations with themselves in my DMs. One of them was texting me. And one showed up to a show and then one was like, I'm going to show up to your show. And I told him basically that I don't want to date you and, you know, don't come. So we'll get to that.

But the first guy, we hooked up so many years ago. I mean, 10 now, I would think. Like one time I did like him at the time. I don't know. It just didn't work out. We hooked up a couple times. And like, that was it. Right.

But just whatever. But crazy long ago. So long ago, he doesn't live here. so he lives in another city and we go there often. And every time I'm there, he is like in my DMs so hard. Like, can you make some time to meet up with me? It's insane. It's insane.

And it's insane. And it's every single time. And every single time. And then outside of those times too, he DMs me. You know, he'll send me like stuff about the podcast or just whatever and respond to all my stories. Obviously, that goes to all sane. And then he has text to me before too.

He has my number. I mean, we've hooked up. And I don't really, I'm not threatened up. all. Like, he's harmless. I mean, I'm famous last words, but truly. I truly believe that. I don't feel scared. I want to be clear. It's just like, it's almost funny. Like, what are you, like it's insane. The behavior to me is so insane. Like, I do understand a couple messages unanswered. Like Raina said, like, your quote was, I'll do two. I would never do three under any circumstances. You know, I guess there's a world in which guys have been taught, like just keep

persisting, like you'll break her down bad advice. We don't want it. And now, I mean, I feel like in 2022, it's aggressive, bad behavior. Yes. I feel like men are trained to like hunt and pursue and they don't have the same, I mean, I can only speak to being a woman, but they don't have the same like embarrassing things that say like stop. No one wants this. Do not proceed. Like men, it's just like pursue, pursue, pursue, pursue, kill, eat, you know? And it's crazy behavior. Yeah. And I don't trying to blow this out of proportion. It's just something that kind of happened twice where they were showing up. So this guy showed up to a show in another city. And I saw a DM come through that was like, when are your shows? And I ignored it. And I know you guys are just thinking like you just block him. I don't

know. I mean, again, some of it's kind of like funny because I'm like, look at this fucking guy. But also, I think somebody feels a little aggressive. Yeah. And I know him. You know what I'm saying? Like we used to be friends kind. It's just like he's crossed the line and it's like, I can't make it any clear that I'm not interested in this. I'm just like completely ignoring you. And again, I could also just shut him down. But I feel like I shouldn't even have to. But that feels weird too. And like I hate when you do, I mean, so many women can relate to like, you do address this and shut it down. I can think of this, a friend of ours. There was this guy who, um, he kept responding to all of her Instagram stories and pursuing her. And she did finally

say like, hey, I'm not interested. And he like really was like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. I'm just trying to be friends. I just want to be buddies. And all women have gone through that were like, someone then turns it around on you, like you're the crazy person. And that's why women don't say stuff about it because we are all trained because men are going to turn on and be like, you're a bitch, or you misinterpreted that,

or I'm just trying to be friends. And it's like, we just avoid and avoid and placate for so long. And it's like you don't feel physically threatened. So of course you're not going to take the extra step. But like that situation, she was saying to me for months, he will not stop.

He won't stop asking me to hang out. And it's like we avoid these situations because of that. It sucks. Yeah. And thank you for like, and all that. And then he comes to my show. And I see, I realize he's at the show because the host crowd worked at him. I hear his name. I see him. I'm like, oh my God. What? And here's the thing. Yes, there's a world in which he's like, I know her. I used to hang with her. I want to

see her comedy. But he's also asking me out in the DMs a million fucking times before he showed it to my show. So I can only assume that he's like just trying to get in there by showing up to where I work. And I think that there is a spectrum of how people might feel about this. There is a, oh my gosh, call the police. That's crazy. That's stalker behavior. And then there's not a big deal, relax. It's a comedy show. Anyone can come to a comedy show. And I think that most of us would fall somewhere in between. And I go back and forth on how I feel about this and how intensely I feel about it. I felt uncomfortable. I did my thing. I'm a professional. I wasn't bothered on stage by it, but I left right after, and I saw him get up, and I don't know what,

try to find me or whatever. I, like, bolted right after, because also I just, like, wasn't playing on staying for the rest of the show anywhere. I had somewhere else to be. Then he DM me, I was at your show. Again, it's like, I do feel like it's harmless, but I'm just like, dude, this is wild. It's delusional. It's also, like, unfair because, like, anybody else has a job that you can't show up to.

Like, I used to work at the New York Times building. You weren't getting through security. You couldn't show up at my door. It wasn't, you know, like, you were blocked from it. It's like, it's unfair that the person's like, oh, I can find her. I'll just buy a ticket. Like, why should you be subjected to that? Because it's so easy to find you.

And it really sucks and it makes me feel crazy. And I'm like, I'm with you too. I go back and forth because like, who says you're being too cautious if you say, you can never be too cautious. If you feel threatened, you feel threatened. And you can tell venue security or whatever you need to do. Well, so the other thing, and I'll keep this short. There was another guy.

And I basically, I had never met him. It's really, it's not. important kind of a mutual friend introduced us I guess whatever we were we were we were d-ming he also didn't live here you know I can never be interested in someone lives here and we were DMing and I just kind of I was interested for a second and then I just stopped being interested the communication wasn't doing it for me it felt a little much for someone that had never met me it felt like why are you so interested in me why are you trying to fly up here it felt maybe there's a little clout chasing in it whatever I was turned off so I just stopped responding he kept going unanswered messages here's my

number. I'm coming to New York, yada, yada. I didn't respond. And then I, so maybe three or four unanswered. He's in the DM, just talking to himself. And then I saw, I'm coming to your show on Thursday. And I didn't like that because I, it was Francis in my show. I run that show. It's not a quick set, get in and get out. I just felt a little uncomfortable, but whatever. You can come to the show if you want. It's open to the public. So I actually just asked Jared what he thought, because he's a comedian, too. Jared didn't like it at all. all. Jared was like, I think you should say, I don't, I'm not interested in this. Please respect my boundary. And I would appreciate you not coming to the show. And then Jared was like, I also would tell

the club manager and to show them a picture. And I was like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Again, like you said you can't be too cautious. I didn't feel like this is a dangerous person. Yes. And I, but I also love that Jared took that stance, you know. So I was like, I am going to say something. The other guy can talk to himself till the end of time in my DMs, but I also want to be up front with this guy and tell him that, like, I'm not really interested. And if it goes badly and he calls me a crazy slut, okay, but I'm just going to say it. So I just said, like, I got to be honest with you. I just don't see us, like, going on a date or whatever. Like, basically in the nicest way possible, I said, I appreciate you. I said, I appreciate you when to come to the show, but I just don't really

see us going on a date. And he goes, that's fine. And that was it. And he didn't come. And so you know, crisis subverted and I just was like, how is this happening back to back where I feel like I'm setting the message that I'm not interested in? You're showing up. I think so many guys have been like taught hunt, kill, go after what you want. And I also think like, like I said before, so many of them. Sit up front. Pay to go sit at a work. Pay to see her. Right. You have to pay. You have to pay. You're not lurking in the back. You bought a ticket. I mean, it's kind of flattering. But I think that like this behavior, so all of us don't do this a lot of times because we're so used to being attacked when we do. And somebody gaslighting us and making us feel crazy and like we've overreacted or like we've read the situation wrong.

And I think that we don't do it because people call us a fucking bitch or a slut or you're overreacted, whatever. I don't care. You can call me whatever you want. That doesn't make me wrong. Just because that's your version of what's going on in your head does not mean that my version is not correct. And if I feel uncomfortable, I feel uncomfortable. And I think that you can just assume that somebody's going to take it poorly. you're really lucky.

The guy was just like, okay, I'll back off. Find a like a normal reaction. This other situation with my other girlfriend where the guy got like kind of pissed and made her feel a little crazy. I think the behavior was so crazy and I didn't expect a normal reaction to her saying something calm.

Sure. And that's fine too. But you could have seen that coming. Yes, I saw it coming. And so did she and that's fine too. If the worst thing somebody's going to say is like you're fucking crazy. Okay.

You're crazy for behaving like this. I'd be like, L.O.L. You are. I know you are, but what am I? I will say, I co-sign everything you say. I do think guys are getting better. Whether they're just scared, you'll put it on the internet or not.

Whatever the reason is, we'll take it. I would like to think that it's just in general they're getting better about all this stuff. Like that S&L sketch was just like, send a woman a normal DM. Actually, that is the funniest sketch. Miles Teller host SNL on Saturday night. And our friend Marcello is now on the cast.

We're so happy for him. But it was a skit, like what? like it's jeopardy sort of and it's just like send a woman a normal response to her text and the text were like hey it's been a while how are you and the one guy's army hammer and adam levin and adam levin and who are the other two um neil patrick no not neopatra kerosi kerosi kaisen um Tyson no no neil digrosi tyson yeah sure yeah and then one of the cast members it's like i'm just a gay man i'm just here but then he got fucked up too because do it what it's fine go watch it

SNL posts all their sketches in full on their Instagram if you guys are curious. So anyway, it's just further validation that this is still an issue that men don't know appropriate responses to women and all the stuff. But I do think that it's just going to be half and half. And I think that plenty of guys will literally just be like, say less, I got it. And to the women or the men that are dealing with this listening, always feel empowered to say, hey, I'm flattered, but I'm just not interested. You can say whatever you want, but I do think if you're a little nicer with,

it unless you've been threatened or really like unless they're being super aggressive but if they've just really just been bugging you i think uh hey thanks so much i'm really flattered thanks for when to come to the show thanks for you know whatever but i'm just not interested at this time or i just don't see us going on a date like whatever it is like most normal people should be like got it we all have those guys in our dms and we're like are you good they're just responding to every what are you thinking what are they respond to every instagram story you know who does that to me but it's funny is Bobby Westside response to he flame emojis

but like I'm good friends of this fiance she knows but Bobby is so funny also that like out for every four flame emojis he's got like a hilarious one liner so like I just let it happen but we all have that guy in our DMs that she's like responding responding flame emojis something ridiculous

and you're like are you okay so I actually encourage you to not leave those actually I retract my statement what we're writing is, are you good? Ladies, you good? Find that guy in your DMZ. And write, are you good?

Oh, you guys please do that and then screenshot the responses. If you feel safe, we don't want anybody, you know, getting a bunch of backlash, but oh my gosh. So my first tactic is that I always leave it on red. I always make sure somebody sees that I read it because I want sometimes,

I used to just delete, delete, delete, but I want you to know that I saw this and chose to not respond because no response is a response. Get it through your fucking head. Yes. Amen. Go off queen. Okay. You have a couple, you have some wrecks. Yeah.

So you know, I've been really like scraping the bottom of the barrel to find some wrecks recently. But she still hasn't watched the summer I turn pretty. You, I asked her, you clapped back in me so hard. I was like, I don't know if I'm allowed to text her for the next hour or two. Raina said, what should I watch? I said, don't you dare fucking. ask me what you should watch and then we didn't talk for two hours. I was like, I'm going to let her start the next conversation.

So again, if you're new here. At first I was like, maybe I misinterpreted it. Maybe she was like, you've seen everything, girl, you got this. If you're new here, Raina has not watched the summer I Turn Pretty, which is an incredible show. Everybody loves it. Everybody does love it. And she refuses.

You're checking our ticket sales. Okay. Raina isn't really engaged in what's happening. So she hasn't watched yet. So honestly, anything that Rainer recommends, don't watch just in, just despite me. Yeah, just despite you. That was so funny. I was like, maybe she's like, you got this.

You've already seen everything. Nope. So I've been really scraping the bottom of the barrel. So I'm on CNN to find stuff to watch, and I'll tell you about two really good things. So Stanley Tucci, searching for Italy. Yes. You know, Anthony Bourdain and No Reservations used to be like my favorite show about food, and I've never found anything to really replace it.

And I really love this show. It's on the second season right now. He just goes around and eats. he's like a great host. I think he's hot. Stanley Tucci? Well, he's bald and he's sexy. You know, I think he's married to Emily, who is Jim from the office, his wife, Emily,

what's her name? She was in Delaware's Prada, red hair. Oh, Emily Blunt? Emily Blunt's sister is his wife. Oh, okay. I love sister. Got it. There's some trivia for you guys.

I just, the show shot beautifully. You and I spent some time in Italy. Well, I did the summer. And it's a great show. I really enjoyed it. I found it because I was already on CNN. I was watching the Murdox Empire of Influence. So it is a docu-series about the Murdox.

If you don't know who the Murdox are, Rupert Murdox basically owns so much media. And he owns Fox News. Tons of newspapers all over the world. He really controls the media. Awesome. So awesome. It's an interesting take. You love it.

You love that family to just control the media. So they dive into it and they talk about, no, I mean, obviously. They talk about how they've, like, influenced elections with the New York Post. and with their other media outlets and how they've really swung huge presidential and mayorial, mayoral elections. I think it's really interesting. It's in the third episode came out last night,

and then if you like Succession, that show is based off of the Murdox extremely closely. So it's about the battle for power of his three children who's going to take over the empire, and just really interesting. I thought it was fascinating and a really sad, but eye-opening take on how much the media can control, basically the news cycle,

and what you see and what the truth is. And if you're just so obsessed with the Murdox, you can also watch Bombshell, if you haven't watched that yet. Oh, love that movie so much. I sat by myself and I cried. So Rain and I saw our first movie together.

We sat in the theater next to each other for the very first time in this friendship, in this five-year friendship. Literally, I don't know what your theater behavior is. I've never been to a movie theater with you. Well, it wasn't a traditional theater outing. We went to a movie premiere, so we were just there for the house.

outfits in the after party. Yes. Honestly, we just wanted to get dressed up and the after party was great. So the movie is The Luckyest Girl Alive, which is going to be on Netflix based on the book by Jessica Connell. And so Milakunis plays the lead. And we enjoyed it. I put this on my story and I feel the need to also just tell anyone who will listen that it's a trigger warning for rape and violence. You said it, how did you said it so perfectly? Realistic depictions? for realistic depictions of a school shooting. So like a reenactment. I really have not really seen that.

So I don't know if Netflix is going to do the trigger warning. I felt that rape that I didn't expect was surprising to me. And then the school shooting so like actually actually acting it out where you have a active shooter in the school. So this is heavy now. But I just want to say how heavy this movie is because I do want to recommend it. But it's if you were triggered. by that, I wouldn't watch it or I would be prepared. Rain and I were a little surprised that we didn't know what was coming. And even, I'm just going to say it, like, even the book jacket

doesn't say it. And I've just found that surprising because of both of those things together being truly the main themes. Yes. I found it hard to get through. I spent like the entire part of that with like my hand over my face. Yeah. And I think these things, it's like they're important to not shield away from because they're happening and they need to be addressed. But we should know when they're coming as a viewer so uh i have mixed feelings on it someone sent me a dm this morning about the trigger warning from last week about tell me lies and she said she has mixed feelings on like how much how there's a lot of this content and the impact and obviously that we do we can't pretend this stuff isn't happening but how much is too much and how should it be

depicted and how should survivors be shown and all these things this is kind of a deeper conversation but uh this took a turn but this was rain and i's first movie to And it was heavy. I think they did a good job, though, and the director did a good job, and Milakunis was great in it, and it will be on Netflix. And I'm assuming it will probably be pretty popular at Netflix. So we at least just wanted to let you guys know to know what to expect. Yeah.

And it is empowering. Yeah, how it ends is empowering. And it's just, you know, I never saw a trigger warning anywhere. We got the press release. I asked another girl that we saw at the premiere, like what she thought. And she felt the same way. Like, this isn't just me and Ashley. So, yeah, just watch with caution.

Yeah, I've watched with caution. So we did, we went to this, and then we went to the after party, and it was cool. It was like all the, you know, the author and the director and the stars that were all there. It was the girl that plays the teenage Mia Lekunas was in Cruel Summer, which we just loved. She's such a great actress. She was there. So we just had fun. And then we kind of moved out of the main area where all the stars were.

And we sat in this booth with our friend Ted and Raina 18 Sliders. It was so good. I think about the memory. And they were, never been to a party like this before. It was so fancy. It was like every five seconds, somebody walked up to us with like a cheeseburger or some pasta or something on a skewer or sushi. It was like every time I turned around there were tray passing martinis, espresso martinis. Like, it was fancy.

It was good. They had the carbone, spicy rigatoni. I had like two, three of those. But you, Raina, the sliders, I was like, she's going in again? I had four. It was so. I mean, it was our dinner. But it was funny because I was like, when's she going to tap out?

I actually tapped out after three and I had a lot of self-talk about I was going to have another one. I'm on the way out the door. Someone walked by me and grab the other one. But I was just like, she is going in. And the guy that we were with, like that's, listen, he's hot and we love him so much. That's how you know I don't want to date him because I am attacking cater waiters for more cheese for hers in front of him. When I want something that's being passed, I am laser focused. You can't even get her into a conversation.

You can't. No. You literally can't. If I see something that, because it's good, it might be limited. I get into a scarcity mindset. I'm like, I am going to chase down a cater waiter. If I, like, they were passing plates of carbone, spicy rigatoni, arguably the most famous pasta in the world.

I was like, I got to get me some of that. Like I was just like, then they would bring a train. Everybody would grab them. And so I was starting to panic. It was hard to. Anyway, that was a fun party we went to. It was fun. first movie together. Yes. Okay. Fourplay episode, everything but sex, kissing episode, all the things.

Azizu, are you excited? Okay. All right. It's too much. He said you're too much. Okay, let's get into it. He's like, don't foreplay me. Yeah, he's like, please stop it. I mean, I do kiss him on the mouth, obviously. That's your foreplay? Have you ever kissed a dog in the mouth? Probably not. I barely want dog picks. Yeah. You'll get there. You'll get there. I just, I love for play and it has, it's taking me like a lot. Like I sometimes just like jump right into sex. Like I've had boyfriends in the past be like, you gotta like warm me up a little bit. Like, because I'm just like slam the dick inside of me and let's get going.

Oh, you don't, like you don't do enough for play? Sometimes I don't do enough for play. And I have started to really enjoy it over the years and it's like you and I've done this show and I think that like I've learned to get more creative. There's so many things I like that fall into the foreplay category. So like I don't need to get to the like ram your dick inside of me part. of it as quickly. Yeah, I mean, a floor plate is so important. It's what gets you ready for sex. I mean, it's what gets you lubricated. It's what gets a penis hard. It's like you wouldn't just

stick your lasagna in the oven without preheating it, you know, you got to preheat that oven. I mean, I know some people take longer to preheat than others. Like, I don't know, maybe you're an air fryer. I think those heat up a little quicker. Like, I don't have an air fryer. I'm coming out to someone who doesn't participate in the culture. But maybe you're an easy bake. Maybe you go, it's quicker to heat up. But someone has to eat a bit of a turkey base, you know? But I think that for most of the time, when we're ready to have sex, we're always engaging in some sort of foreplay, even if it's before anything physical, sexting earlier in the day

or something like that. Like there's, I'm not letting a dick inside me unless I really want it, you know? Like, I'm like, we're going to do more of this. But sometimes you're just ready quick. You're like ready to go. I like for a play that starts even like in that morning for the evening. We'll talk about all kinds of stuff like sending nudes and sexting through. throughout the day. But yeah, I think for play

doesn't just have to mean like getting fingered before sex. It's getting fingered. And like, I think especially as we move into relationships that we're in longer, this becomes more and more important because you're not just like ready to go at all times. You're going to warm me up a little bit more. And I love this stuff that Ian Turner has talked about on our show.

Spontaneous desire versus responsive desire. So this is not an original thought. But he talks about how spontaneous desire a lot in the beginning of the relationship. You just see somebody doing dishes and you're like, I got to lick that pussy. You know? Like, I got to get in that ass.

I got to. Like, somebody. You see someone clean their ass on the tushy. You're like, I'm going to the bathroom. And you're like, I got to lick that clean muddle. Everything somebody does just like cleaning around the apartment. All my examples are cleaning and show. You just show up.

You just exist and I want to suck your dick. But as we get into relationships that are longer, we need to have responsive desire, which means like simmering and percolating desire in somebody, which can come in all kinds of forms. But as we stay in relationships longer, I just don't want to fuck you every second. You've got to work on it. So let's have a kissing conversation.

I love making out. I love kissing. I love talking about kissing. I want to talk about making the first move because you and I very recently both made the first move when it came to the first kiss. So I just want to talk about all this stuff, talk about what we like,

talk about what you need to do to be a good kisser. People are listening, want to be a better kisser for their partners, all the things. Yeah. And we have really creative ideas, freaky stuff. We have products for you guys. Crazy stories.

Crazy stories. So that's what we're going to do today. You want to talk about kissing. I want to talk about kissing. Okay. So a couple things. Your lips need to be moisturized. You need to be flossing regularly.

If you're not flossing regularly, don't be on these streets. Making out people, you've got gnarly food between the back of your teeth. Your breath stinks. And you need to stop. I'm going to give you guys a hot tip. Go on Amazon for $25. Get a water pick. I use them all the time.

I love it. I never floss. I use a water pick. It shoots everything straight through your teeth. It's incredible. And you don't have to remember to buy floss. It's just there. Fill it up with water.

You want a bad breath. You don't like this tip. I stand by the floss. I do smile your breath every once in a while. Well, I have a permanent retainer, so I can't floss. No, you have to use the water pick, you guys. I'm team floss. And beard being trimmed.

This is really. something I need to blow the whistle on is guys that are not appropriately trimming their beards for kissing because I haven't hooked up with as many guys as beards with you as you with you as you have exclusively with beards and a couple times in the past I've made out with guys that their beards weren't trimmed enough and I was like I hate guys with beards this is too much it's uncomfortable in my face why am I sucking your facial hair why is it scratchy and then in the last couple years I'm thinking of guys that I've hooked up with with beards that I didn't even barely notice, you know?

Like, it was fully trimmed around their lips. I loved making out with them. I loved kissing them and hooking up with them and them going down to me and all the things. So guys, keep your beards trimmed. I have a hot beard tip. Yes.

Oh, yeah. Amazing beard tip. Because everybody that I hook up with has a beard. I can't remember the last time anybody that had no facial hair got near me. You looked at somebody that was, he was trying. I wouldn't call it a beard. I wouldn't go that far. He had facial hair.

a patch. He was tried. Or two. So I'm giving Justin Bieber. People like colored hair of a harder time. They do. They do. Like my brother, like he, every, it's patchy.

Not my brother. But I only hook up with facial hair people. So I made out this guy the other night. And at first I was like, why does his breath smell like vanilla? It smells so good. And I like couldn't figure it out. Probably flosses, but keep going. And then I got home and I could like still kind of smell him like on my,

upper lip some girls want to take your sweatshirt Raina just wants you to linger on her upper lip so this is it's called Matt I asked him what it was did you buy it you know when you were in high you know when you were in high school

you would like buy a guy's cologne this is you now buying this guy he offered to send it to me so that I can always smell him it's called Mastro beard butter. Hydrate. It's a beard cream. It smells so good. It's just this little, it looks like a can of chew. Co Gigi. And it smells like vanilla and bourbon. It smelled like really masculine. And it's like I took a little bit of them home with me. Do you think that's what guys feel like

happened to eat your pussy? Do you think their upper lip smells like your pussy over the rest of the day? I don't know. Are people going around washing their upper lip before they go home? No. You just wipe it. Like just give it a wipe. Okay. Well, I gave it a wipe and I could, I could smell him on me like all night long like my pillow smelled like him. Milk mustache. Yeah. I listen, I'm so funny. Like I'm just picturing like it is like your takeaway. You're like, you're like I'll never wash this upper lip again. I really didn't want to. I woke up and I could still smell it a little bit. It was so nice. But anyways, I really like it. It also makes your beer feel nice. So not scratchy. Yeah. I mean, listen, this is not a men's

grooming podcast. But get it for your man. If you get gifts. And then if guys are, we know this guys listen to this. Keep your beard. moisturized. What are you doing? I know, a spiky beard. Yes, like those, those little products, like, really go such a long way in, um, elevating the experience for the woman when it comes to, like, making out. So, okay. I love kissing, though. I'm glad that you wanted to, like, harp on kissing because I, I will, like, go home. We talked to this before. I will masturbate to a good kissing session. I mean, it, nothing, I said this last week, too, like, nothing really gets me going more. Like, I just don't even know if I could date a guy that wasn't going to. I was a guy that wasn't

good kisser. And we can talk about can you fix someone's kissing style. I think you can to a certain extent. But like if they just don't have the lips for it, like, and they just don't really know what they're doing, I mean, I think a couple things. Like, I think what makes the good kisser is knowing how to start the kiss. When you see a TV kiss, you know if it's a good kiss. You ever see some TV kisses, like, even if you're watching like Bachelor in Paradise, where they just go in mouths wide open. You start with your mouth half open, half open. And you know what else I hate when people just like, mouth closed and they're just like lip to lip like you'd kiss your grandparent

like extended tongue. There was a kiss on the Bachelor at last season that they just like held their lips on each other. I'm like what is even going here? Your lips should lock. It's called a lip lock. You're not just like swirling your tongues around with each other which you can get to that point like you get to the sloppy kissing. But when you start kissing like I don't know like I just when people are bad kissers I'm like, how have we come this far in life?

You're not in high school anymore or even college. Like, you should, no one told you this is bad. I just, I can't, I'm never going to tell somebody it was bad. I can't even remember the last time it was like too much saliva or too much tongue or like not enough tongue. Also, I have a huge tongue. It's like part of why I have a list, I think. Like when I watch myself talk, I'm like, damn, how's that tongue fit in there?

There's always a huge tongue too. It's too big for his mouth. Yeah? Yeah. That's what you're in common. But I like an average amount of tongue. and only what it's appropriate. And you match someone's tempo.

Like I'm like, why are you so fast or like too slow? Like I just feel like you're kind of need to match the tempo with your person, you're kissing. Like I feel like some guys are like they think they're just supposed to lick. Like why are you licking my face? Why are you licking my mouth? Like it's kissing is not licking. People are licking you?

Like, have you ever had a face licker? No. I mean, that was like a face licker. Kate and I, I think it was Kate dealt with this face licker when we were like younger. And then there was a sex in the city. episode where the guy was just licking all over Charlotte's face. This has never happened to me.

That's fucking crazy. Yeah. And you can tell somebody to stop the face assault anytime. Yeah. And like a tongue darter, like a pointy little tongue. I've sent guys home. What is your excuse for setting them home? I feel sick.

No, I like your dardy little tongue. I'm not feeling so well. From your tongue. Or if you're like, if it's, you can say whatever you want, whatever. Like I'm an early morning. I mean, sorry, I'm just, I'm really tired. Anything. You know is no.

Bye. Stop is stop. Also, an inappropriate type of kissing and an inappropriate time. There's a time and place for biting, for excessive tongue. It's not in front of my family. Two.

What if I'm saying? Biting your lip in front of your dad. When people do too much in front of their family or even like, well, listen, I don't know. I go back and forth on a wedding kiss. Like, it's my day. I'm doing it.

want you have it's fine you can't bite my lip at my wedding let's see if you look like Courtney Kardashian at your wedding with a kissing you want full tongue on a wedding kiss I don't know I feel like by the time I get to a wedding with somebody we will have hooked up enough times that we don't need to be like tongue punching each other at the wedding yeah have you had this kiss where it's like this is you it's just when you're like really into somebody we're almost like I guess it could be like lust and passion but really when you're just so enamored with somebody and you're just like mouth to mouth, just like breathing in each other's mouth, like slow kissing. It's like so hot and sexy. You're just like obsessed with each other. It's like barely kissing, but it's so

hot. You're just like giving each other mouth to mouth is how it feels sometimes where you're like, we're just hot boxing each other's mouth. Is this even kissing but you're so into it? Do you know I'm saying? Is this resonate with anybody? I don't know if it's resonating with me, but I'm sure I've done it. It sounds really sexy and lovey. Or it's just like slow in the mouth. It's just like slow and the mouth to mouth action. It's like not so it's like almost sometimes that can happen post-coital where you're like a little tired. It's like almost lazy kissing, but you're just so in it.

I love this. Yeah. A little turned on by it. I love a hand on the neck. A guy puts his hand in your neck when you're making out. Oh my God. Because you know that's going to happen later. Like I love it.

I love a hand in the hair. If a guy gets his fingers in my face, I'm sucking his fingers. You know what sucks for me is I wear hair extensions. And I love hands in the back of my hair. and it's just like, I just deal with it. Yeah. Like, I know they could feel the track and I don't even care. It feels so good.

I love it someone's like lightly tugging on your hair while you're making out. I'm just like, you're going to make me come so hard when you are inside of me. I'm so excited about this. Yes, that's the thing. It's this preview of what's to come, literally. And start the kiss whenever you want. Kiss somebody else. You should be able to read the room and know if somebody wants you to kiss them.

And I don't know any men that have ever gone on a date with a woman and they've reported back, I can't believe she kissed me. Ew. You have? I mean, I think if a guy is really not into a girl, he doesn't want her to kill. Like our friend was just telling us this, that he went out with this girl. He wasn't into her.

And she came in for the kiss, didn't read the room, and he didn't want it at all. I mean, I think, you know, we're all the same when it comes to this. You're not into somebody. You're on a date with them. The last thing you want to do is kiss. I'm like, I don't, I think just like women, all men are not just down for whatever if they're really not feeling you. I guess I'll walk it back. I think that it's like if you're both feeling each other.

Okay, so you go in for the kiss. I don't think any guys ever like, I can't believe it. And I want to be in control of this. So let me walk it back. I agree with you. So let's talk about this. I want to talk about women making the first move. Rayne and I and I both did this recently.

And I've probably done it in the past, but I was out with this guy and we were on the dance floor. And I just grabbed him and kissed him. And he reported later that it was so hot. He kept telling me how good a kisser I was. I was like, thank you so much. I really need this. You don't get that validation a lot. So he really loved it, but I'm not doing that unless I am 100% certain that they really want me, that they're really into me, that they're probably about to do it within the same moment. I just beat them to the punch, just by hair. So to me, that's when I'm doing it. When the kiss is very much on the table, I just do it first because it's like sexy to me. And it's sexy. And you did this recently too. And you were like in an elevator at super home. I talked to him. The elevator was amazing. And I was like pretty far away.

from him in the elevator. I had to take like several steps towards him. But he was like leaned up against the wall and like I knew he wanted it. Yes. I was on a date this past like spring and this guy was just like staring at my lips and I was like, you want to kiss me so bad. And he was like, God, I fucking do. Yeah.

Like I thought that. I was so like proud of that moment because it was so bold because I like told him he wanted to kiss me. And I just, oh, I turned me on so much. Yes. This is when you know someone's hands on your leg. Like they're they're on you. They want you.

It's very obvious. And you just take that. that first step. Also, you can do whatever you want. Make the first move all the time if you want. But for me personally, I'm only doing when I'm really, really feeling it when that sexual energy is high. The guy that I met at a show and we went back to the bar and then we ended up hooking up in California. I mean, we were just so close and flirty at the bar. And I was like, do you want to go to my room and make out? That's a line that I use a lot is like want to go make out. I say it all the time. Not all the time. I mean, listen, I'm out of myself. I was like my game. But it's like so hot to me.

Clearly we did other stuff or there's definitely worlds in which you just make. make out, but I just think it's like a hot sexy thing to say. And it sounds kind of like cute in like high school and nostalgic. I don't. It's cute to me. This did not always come naturally to me. Like I'm thinking about it because now I'm like, yeah, obviously die. You just kiss somebody.

But like there's been so long where I will just like sit into a situation where like I don't think like we're talking earlier like men are trained to like hunt and kill be like, you know, go out of things. But not all men are sure that like you've consented to this. And sometimes you've got to give them like a little leg up to let them know. And I've thinking about when you and I first met, we went on our first trip. It was six months after we first met in a couple episodes after we started the podcast.

I was in London and I was out on this like group trip and the PR guy and I ended up like staying out late at this hotel. Everybody went to bed at like 12 and I really wanted to hook up with him. We were at the hotel we were staying at. And like we both just like I think didn't know how to make a move on the other person and ended up drinking for like two more hours and then we're just like finally I kissed him because like I couldn't have another drink without like staying like being alive anymore. You know?

But it didn't come naturally to me. me to like make the first move especially when you're like this is more of like a professional situation like I was doing like a business deal with him kind of so I didn't know like what was appropriate I think he didn't either so it took me like so many hours and I was like half alive by the time it happened I love that where if you feel like he's just being a little hesitant or being a little shy just and you've been so flirty go in for it just do it it's sexy it mean it turned me on and then it turned him on I was like this is and then that's when we were like we're like we got to get out of And if you're not going to fuck that night, like, I was like, oh, do I do want to fuck this guy?

But I was like, I don't want to do it. I shouldn't do it. And a good makeout sustains me. I think it lets somebody know that you're going to be good and bad. And you can do a little foreplay without penetration. It's still like very sexy and turns you on. Yeah. I think that we've talked about this.

We don't want to be repetitive. We've touched on this on other episodes. Like, I think a sexy makeout early on the relationship with no sex is great. And I think that it really leaves someone wanting more. And of course, a guy would prefer to get off as would we. Who doesn't want to get off, you know, but they'll be fine. They'll be fine. Blue balls, whether they're a thing or not, that's not your problem.

I want to have a, you can have a blue clit. Like, it's not, it's, sometimes you get turned on and you don't finish the act. And that's nobody, that's, you do what you want to do. It's not exploding off her. If you could make out with somebody, you can go fuck them. later. Yeah. All right.

So we've gone past kissing. Okay, one thing, one thing. If you want someone to kiss you, you're like, I'm not doing this. But like, do you have any tips for like if you're like, you really want someone to kiss you? What do you do? Besides me saying, you really want to kiss me? There is that.

I mean, I'm just, I'm naturally a very florid person. I find it pretty easy to convey that like I'm into somebody. And I think I do that with my body language. I make really good prolonged eye contact. I will bite my lip, kind of a lot. I don't even know that I'm doing that. had like multiple guys that have been on a date so be like you like really like kind of like suck on your bottom lip a little bit. Yeah, I love a little lip biting. I'm, I touch somebody. I like touch

their arm or I touch their leg. Like I'm just not just comes very naturally to me. I don't know that comes naturally to everybody. But like your body language will say it all with like the twinkle in your eye and like licking your lips. I like my lips a lot too. And just draw attention to the mouth and prolonged eye contact. So all that stuff is great if you want to do like nonverbal cues. Yes. Drawing attention to your mouth is great. Pop a min. do a wink. Touching is like the number one thing. And like you find an excuse to touch their face, you know,

tell them they have an eyelash or make something up. They're not going to know. So here's some of my other favorite foreplay. We'll go through some of the stuff that you guys recommended because, yeah, I think that like sex can get a little boring and you've got to like invent other ways to like touch people. If you're holding back on sex for whatever reason, you just don't want to have it yet or you just are not ready to or you have your boundaries set in place.

least this is other stuff. My favorite thing in the world is massage. I love being touched. I love touching somebody else. And I love to like kiss somebody's neck and their ears while I'm doing it. I like to take my shirt and my bra off. They can like feel my tits on their back and like my nipples. There's no way I'm not having sex with you after this.

But I think it's so sexy. And I think you can do like one of two ways. Like if you're just obviously like watching a TV program, you can just start massaging somebody. A TV program. Like a CNN TV program like I like to watch. No one's going to be like, ew, don't touch me. But I think to make like a night out of it is like really fun too and be like I plan this thing. It's really fun.

And you can like have candles and a massage oil and like an outfit. So I'll have a laundry tip for later. But we are releasing this week our vibes only massage oil. And we are so excited. It's our newest product in our line. It is the smell is so great. Just like a really light sweet scent. And it is really, really perfect if you want to just create like a little bit of a date night.

And sometimes I think these experiences are so great because, like, they are like the gift that keeps on giving almost. So, like, if you give somebody like a really sexy massage as a date night, you can, like, masturbate to that long term. You can talk about it. Like, I love talking about, like, what you did to me last night kind of thing. Yeah. And it can be part of your dirty talk for the future as well. So I really like that. Yeah.

And the massage oil, we love ours, obviously. It's really silky smooth. It's made with as natural ingredients as we could find. The scent, it's a light scent. and the flavor is juicy berry. So we tested all the flavors. And so you can use this massage oil and then you can lick it. I mean, it's not meant to be ingested in large quantities.

It's not a food product, but it's totally safe to like lick or kiss or anything like that. So you can do it and you can kind of like lick all over and put it where you want to lick it off. You can do all the things. So we love it so much. Again, this isn't just a plug for the massage oil, but we are so excited about the massage oil. And it's so cute to show up on a date night and be like, I got something for us for later. It's a great. It's a great gift.

and it just gets someone excited. I mean, I love a massage. I mean, that guy really tricked me into with the massage this summer. He promised me a massage. I never got it. But he did show up with the oil, but he massaged. You're pushing. We did fuck, so it's fine.

But I would have liked the massage, but it's fine. I love it. I think it's so sexy. You don't be good at it. It's just, but I am good at it. And I love, and a guy that has a big strong hands, like, it's going to be pretty good. I think it shows forethought. It shows like creativity.

It's such a sexy way to edge. Like I love when somebody like massages like around my, why am I like getting all bashful because we're on YouTube? Like when you're going like close to penetrating me but you don't penetrate me. Like I love just like teasing. I think it's so, so sexy and like can really prolong the experience. And again, it's fun, thing fun to talk about later and masturbate too. Yeah.

There's a reason why they're in every dating show that you've ever watched. You know, it's sexy and fun and a great thing to do as a couple. Yeah. So you can get that at vibes only.com. And we got you cover for date night. I'm going to plug other products that aren't ours. Well, I mean, we sell these products because we believe in this stuff and they're so important. And like, perfect your hand job and bring a little lube on a date.

I have been bringing little travel things a lube. Hand jobs can be really great. No guy has ever complained about a hand job. I mean, I guess I've heard guys say, like, I could do it better myself. But if you really use pressure, you really stroke it, you really get in there, especially if you use a little bit of lube or your spit or your own juices, whatever. Like, I've never heard a guy. I've heard them say, like, this was so hot.

She gave me a hand job. I got off. Anything creative outside of just normal penetrative sex, I think is great. And you're going to be like the 1% of girls they've been with. And they're like, what did she just bring out? That's crazy. Like, imagine showing up to somebody's house with some massage oil. I mean, do it on the first date if you want.

But I think it's so great to incorporate something that shocks people a little bit. Shock factor. I just, I think that so much foreplay can start so far before you're even like touching private parts. Private parts. During a TV program. For me, like I could start early in the morning. Somebody suggested we have a great episode about taking nudes.

We'll direct you guys to those episodes. But taking Polaroids of yourself and just dropping them into somebody's like bag. I think it's so, so sexy. Any kind of sexting you can do throughout. the day about like what you're going to do to me later i think is like so hot you don't have to have like a full-blown sexting thing i think sometimes people are hesitant to start sexting in the middle the day because you're like i didn't sign up for this i got you to do but like just a little bit is like really nice like i can't wait to you come over later to do x-y-z to me um ashley and i have a

great sexting episode take your dirty talk to the next level that was in june 13th of 2020 so and we did a nudes episode send nude sending nudes sending receiving and perfecting them and that was in July of 2021. It's July 21st, 2021. Oh, okay. I love Foreplay, like, so much. I love being, like, touch so much. I mean, I would say that it is definitely a bit of a complaint I've had with some partners that I wanted more of it, you know?

And partners that really took the time and we're, like, touching all over each other and we're just, like, rolling around. It's, like, so hot and sexy. And you're just, like, so much more ready to get it on when you finally get down to it. For me, I'm not usually getting naked with somebody unless. I'm planning to have sex with them. It's just personally. And that's why I want to start wearing underwear more on dates because I feel like a guy takes my pants off and my pussies out.

And like I could have another barrier there that we could be rolling around when I'm not wearing a shirt and a pussy out. Like I've been wearing a sweater. But here's my other sweater. No kidding. But like I just, I've realized this recently where I stopped getting waxes. I want my pants off. And you're off.

There's a full bush. They're like, what? I, this has happened a couple times as of late where a guy takes my pants off. I want my pants off. I'm wearing jeans. It's uncomfortable. And then I'm just like, pussy out. It's just a lot where I think you can have a good time with your jeans off, you know.

But I think there's, I think there's something to be said for dry humping. Like, I will say that. I hate to say it. I hate to give this more air time. But the guy that goes to me, I mean, we had this hottest makeout session on my. couch. I mean, his finger in my mouth. We were like dry humping. Fingers and mouths. Yeah. People don't do it enough. We were all, it was so hot. I was so wet. He was rock hard. Like, I mean, again, I'm glad we didn't fuck. I didn't want to. I decided not to in the

moment, but also I never heard from him again. So I'm extra glad that we didn't. But I've had more than just that one, but that one sticks out of my mind as just like this really sexy, fully clothed makeout hookup foreplay, whatever. Uh-huh. And I think that you can, like, stop somebody and be like, I want to, like, feel you a little more like this. Like, you don't have to go straight to penetration because I'm always, I'm barreling towards the penetration.

But, like, to actively stop it and edge somebody a little bit, I think it's, like, really, really hot. Um, I think other, like, I, you know, when we ask people, like, what kind of for play do you do a lot of people like, watch porn? I don't actually think that it's most people's enclation to, like, find a porn and put it on and be like, now we're going to watch a porn, you know? So I more lean towards, like, shows that have, like, some soft core porn that can kind of like get us going.

I'm like tricking you into like Game of Thrones. I have never watched an episode of Game of Thrones and not masturbated ever. So any shows like softcore porn, I mean if you are like confident, ready to go, you're like I picked a porn category. I picked the porn we're going to watch through it on the TV. Great, good for you. But I don't know that's like most people's inclination to go straight into that. So like anything which is like sexy themes to like put you in the mood is really great.

I love lingerie and I bought this thing the other day. What? I don't know who I'm going to wear this forever. But I think it can be weird. Like I've had these moments where I get home with somebody I'm like so drunk and I'm like, just wait here for a minute. And you're like in the other room for like 10 minutes trying to get this thing on. And it's like that it just comes off right away.

But I do think lingerie can be like really sexy and the idea that you like put it on ahead of time. So I found this thing. You can wear it out. You can wear it out of your clothes because it's pretty tight. Okay. I found this on Victoria's Secret and I thought it was really crazy. And I was like, let me just buy this because there's no way this looks good.

It is shockingly good looking. It is called the bondage teddy. Oh my gosh. We'll show you guys this for the YouTube. Yeah. We'll bring it up on the screen. It is shockingly flattering on your body. It's incredible and it hugs your whole body.

Oh. Oh, is it, is that just straps or is it mesh under it? It's under, it's just nude. Like there's nothing under this. Those are just straps. But there's underwire here. So it holds your boobs up as like a real bra. And then these, there's straps all around it.

This is just like a bondage. It's elastic. It looks like you're about to go zip lining. It sounds like a body artist. But if you guys are looking at it, it's called the Bondage Teddy on Victoria's Secret comes with black and red. I love it.

I bought it. It's like surprisingly flattering and fits. I saw it at first and I was like every part of my body is be sticking out of those holes. But I loved it and it's crotchless also so somebody can just. Yeah. Okay.

Yeah, you could also stick a parachute on it and skydive if you guys are into that kind of thing. This is really good. The thing is crazy looking. It's giving sex swing. It looks like you are. It looks like you dressed up like a sex wing for Halloween. It did on my Instagram story and I was like,

who on earth would ever wear this? And this girl DMed me who I guess listens to our show and she's like, I got to tell you, I'm one of the designers of that product. What? At Victoria's too great. And she was like, it's actually like really great. And then another listener DM me, I was like, I got something exactly like this. And I got to tell you, it looks so good.

And she sent me a photo of herself in it. I was like, this is too far. I can't see this. And then I opened it. She just looked so great. And so I bought it and I love it. And I hope for an opportunity to wear it. But any kind of lingerie that isn't going to be like really hard,

uncomfortable to wear under your clothes and isn't going to take you forever to put on. Because sometimes I just get home and I'm like, I don't want to fucking do this. A fucking garter belt and shit. Yeah. So this slips perfectly under your clothes. And of course you guys, you can have a vibrator in your panties that your partner controls with the vibes only app and the controller's free.

So just to get the Gigi Panny vibe and stick it, not in that because that doesn't have a crotch. but whatever else, your body suit, your panties, I'm going to start trying to wear more underwear. So that's a good way to get you going either. Okay. You boot past that. I love the idea of being a dinner with like another couple or being on an airplane or something.

You can just like control it. Yeah, the Gigi Panny vibe. Like your partner can get in there and control. That is the hottest thing in the world. Yeah. If you're competitive with like another couple, you can do it at dinner. Together.

No, I'm just saying like you go to dinner with another couple and then you're like, oh my God, I was wearing vibrating panties the whole time. That is not what I think. thought you were going to say, I thought you were going to say that you both the women wear the vibrators and both the men to compete to see who can get off queer. Or that. Imagine seeing that at a table. Imagine being the server for that table. You're like, what's going on? You're like, Babe Keen order for me because I'm about to come. Here's my other four play, favorite forplay, face masks. So anytime you can blind hold somebody.

Nope. Did that, did enough of that in 20. 2020, 2021. I'm not wearing a mask. I'm anti-mask. We put in our time for masks. You're not putting them. I don't care. I'm not putting them.

I don't care. I'm not putting it. I'm actually triggered. That is so funny. I'm like, it's just an eye mask. We're like, I'm not doing it. It's triggering. It reminds me of the pandemic.

I said face mask. I meant eye mask. Also, what if I said face mask? And I just meant like, you know, like a clay face mask. Yeah. Like skincare. Yeah. But, yeah, one of the best blowjubs.

ever gave. I just used a sleep mask and I gave it to him and I was like put your hands behind your back and every time we tried to touch me I just smacked his hand and I just like sucked his dick while he was blindfolded and it just I don't know any kind of like blind somebody just physically stick them stick a knife in their eye. No just blindfold them. It's so sexy and they don't know where you're going to touch them next and any type of edging at all is like so so hot to me. More stories like that in the vibes only app. Listen I'm just going to say this is relevant. Okay so we asked our listeners on Instagram what are you in two for play so i'll kick it off oh here we go out at dinner bar with other people

i just start rubbing him over the pants while having a combo here's the thing i don't know that people want to sit there with a hard dick and they're with their friends and your girlfriend's and their dick is hard and they're like making eye contact with the server and they can't get up like i have thought about this deeply and i'll do it but and i'll do it well it's giving wedding crassers to me. Like, I'm just thinking of that scene when, with Vince Vaugh and Eiffisher and she's doing that. And she's like licking her lips while she's doing it. So far the face. And her dad's there. Yeah. I don't know. Listen, if you're into this, fine. Okay. Tong in the ear. The wet willie. No kink shaming, but I don't want a wet willie. I want heavy breathing and like a light flick of the tongue. Yeah. I like, I love any kissing around my like

neck area. I'm super sensitive there. I mean, a lot of people are. So I'm not like. a special type of body and like up up near my earlobes and everything but I now I want to do a poll I really want to know because I nobody wants a full tongue in the ear it's disgusting obviously people do she means tongue around the ear she she didn't know what she was saying okay

I love this next one we didn't this didn't come up but shower together or take a bath together I think just like being nude in water together I mean Ashley's never not nude in water Ashley can't have sex with somebody without getting to a shower It's not like a weird religious thing. It's crazy. Rana brought this up.

We were going to talk about this. This is crazy. We were going to talk about this in the show. But there was a point where I slept with three guys in a period of time. And one we were in the shower. The other one we were in the hot tub and the shower. And then the other one we were in the bath. And I don't even say fast.

And she sent me a photo of them in the bath together. Listen, we share everything. She wasn't nude. It was neck up, you guys. Well, I was thrilled. I know, but it wasn't titties out. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It wasn't your sweater down.

I mean, again, again, this is like if you're trying to hold back from sex, I don't know that I'd take a shower together, but. No, this is we've, a lot of this is we've already put. I'm not throwing an eye mask on somebody. Do you like put your hands behind your head if we haven't fucked yet? But, yeah, I like being nude in water and Ashley can't get enough of it. Okay. Okay, listen, this made me laugh so hard flashing each other.

It made, like, you just run in the room and you just like flash and then you run. I think that's so funny. Or just you're like cooking dinner or and you just like pull a titty out. It's like Raina's birthday. You just unbox one. Poking buttholes. What? Is this like going up to someone and just, what is that called?

What does that mean? It's called, is it called like being zooked? It's called like some. Oh, it's like we're doing the motion. Now we're on YouTube. Or how guys like balls. They like, card swipe you. Oh, I love a credit card swipe.

Like, sexually? No, like, I would always do that to a guy around the house. Like, I would just slip my hand up his butt crack. I think it's funny. And I would go, credit card swipe. And then he was so churned on. You guys fucked after. Like, if I, like, I love, like, butts.

I love guys with good butts. Like, oh my gosh. The guy that I, the guy that promised me massage that I never got best butt I've, like, ever seen. And I love a guy with, like, a tight ass in a boxer brief, like a tight boxer brief. Who doesn't? Not a hot take. But if I see it, I see both cheeks.

I got to swipe up. You're going to get in there. That's Ashley's 4 play. She's like, credit card swipe. I'm like, Amex Platinum coming in. I don't care about butts at all. You could just not have a butt and it wouldn't change my life at all. Like, it just didn't exist back there.

I wouldn't care. I honestly, I would say most guys have hooked up with have a nice butt. I really like it on a guy. I love a guy that's caked up. That guy this summer, right? I'm never in my life. I wish I would have gotten a photo. when he took his pants off to get into the hot tub,

I was like, holy shit. I don't think I've ever noticed, like, a good butt on somebody. I will tell you, I will notice a bad butt. I did somebody for a long time that just had, like, a deflated little butt.

Like, both of the cheeks looked like they used to be filled up, and somebody just went, pop. No. No. And I would take photos of his butt all the time and, like, laugh about it. Body shaming?

Okay. Yeah, I'm body shamed my boyfriend. Whatever. Okay. Scheduled sex via code names on each other's social calendar. I love that. I love just sending someone a calendar invite for sex. Here's something I've never thought of before,

and I'm so disappointed in myself, sending a sexy voice memo. I love that. I'm so turned on by it because no one loves phone sex more than me, and like, I don't even have to be interrupted by you while I do it. Like, yeah. I think it's so hot. Also, make sure you tell somebody please be in private when you open this.

Oh, good call. Warning. Good call. But I love, love, love that idea. I make him close his eyes while I jack him off slowly with Loub while telling him sexual stories. Whoever you are, please contact us for the vibes only app. Excuse me, she's just making up bedtime stories while she jacks this guy off slowly.

More information. I used to date somebody who liked me to tell him about when I hooked up with women. Like retell the stories of me fucking girls. Yeah. I love that. I love it. She checks him off slowly. I love this.

Dry humping, edging charge of the whole day, toe sucking, seductive touching. A lot of foot stuff came up. Yeah. He grates my cheese for me shirtless, and that does it every time. You know, if that's what you're into. We'll get into some food stuff, gone wrong.

I like the idea of games. So somebody wrote strip, Uno or four play games, and they said they suggested Amazon, so I can't suggest any in particular. But any kind of like strip card games, sexual, like, tell me a secret, truth or dare, strip poker, whatever. I'm really turned on by that idea.

I think that's, like, really fun. Any activity. I like this. Taking off my underwear and slipping it to them at the restaurant during dinner. I mean, if it's, like, clean, like, you know, like, sometimes you know. Like, sometimes your underwear is going to be gross, but, like, what if you? There's stuff in it. That's your period under underwear.

But guys, like that. Ew. What if there's, like, a stripe in it? Like, a white stripe. Right. I mean, Amy Schumer, she used to say that her underwear when she took it off, looked like she's, like it was dragged it through cream cheese. No, that's, it was in a movie, Jenny.

The movie's called Obvious Child. She talks about her. Her underwear looks like she dipped into a vat of cream cheese. Jenny's sleet? Yes. Okay. I mean, in my opinion, I mean, she would jump. So she did that for Chris.

There's parallel thought. But, yeah, maybe just like a backup pair of undies that you just like wafted around your vagina. But maybe. That is so funny. That is so, so funny. If you brought a backup pair of underwear to the restaurant, so you slipped it in his pocket or wherever, and then you get home and he takes off your underwear and he's like, wait, I thought you had given me your underwear. And you're like, oh, that was like, you're busted.

He shows you care. Okay, so this is for nights where we're not going to get naked with somebody. It's so true. If you give somebody the backup pair, you got to remember to take off the original patch. I am picturing myself doing this, which is hard to picture because I don't run to wear it. I am picturing the backup pair, slipping it to him at dinner, all sexy. And then we get home and he's starting to take off my pants.

I'm like, oh, my God. I'm like, oh, fuck. I'm going to float an idea. I don't think any man would even notice. I know. It's so true. I see like 95% of men would be like it wouldn't even cross their mind that you gave them underwear earlier and you're still wearing underwear.

I don't think it would come up. Or if it did, they'd just be like, that's crazy. They wouldn't be like, wait a minute. I need an explanation. Women would be like, where'd you get this underwear? Where did this go before me? Oh, you're just out shopping for underwear and you're sticking pockets. Yeah, but it's different with men.

Like you can't do box or is it dinner? What if you're at dinner? What if you're at dinner? You're like, sitting at Hillstone and you're like, and you're like, what am I just to do with this? This won't even fit. I brought a clutch tonight. You have to like ball it up in the napkin, get rid of it.

You just like throw it out. Skin marks 100%. This off and walks through a restaurant with this in your hand. I'm really thinking of like, I'd try to be sexy slipping me as boxers. I'd be like, ew. It smells like Ball sweat. There's a skin mark. I'm throwing these out, babe.

You're like, give them to the server. You're like, can you just toss these? What do you like live with the person? And you're like, I'm just going to take these home for you? What am I going to do with these? You want me to put these in my YSL? There's food here. I was just sit at the table with my shrimp cocktail

and your boxers. Oh my God. Okay. On that note, let's do the stories. Okay. Okay, so we got some stories for Play Gone Wrong. We're just going to go through these. We picked three of our favorites, our top three.

Okay, so she says, before I had any real understanding of Foreplay, I'd heard about putting food on dicks for blowjobs, whipped cream, pudding, et cetera. You got to get our blowjob gel. It's really the only thing we can recommend. And she says, I decided to employ the sexy tactic with peanut butter.

I slathered about five tablespoons of organic Adams PB on his D before starting in on quote unquote mission impossible. I'm no physicist, but even at 19, I should have had the foresight to understand peanut butter is literally the opposite of a lubricant. I could not speak, swallow, or even feel him through the nutty dong sarcophagus of my own creation. I didn't want to admit I was wrong, so I kept trying to choke it down through my teary eyes. FYI, my eyes were the only part of my body that was wet at this point until he said

this needs to end, skull emoji. after multiple showers his dick still smelled like peanuts and I had cotton mouth for days. Oh my God. Cannot recommend, can't recommend not using nut butter's and foreplay enough. And thank you for doing the Lord's work with the blow gel. Just please never make a peanut butter flavor. Hashtag trauma. This is so funny.

I can't even begin. Like, I feel like I feel this. I feel like you hear that stuff when you're young of like whipped cream and hot fudge. And you're just like peanut butter. It's like a... That is crazy. It's like sawdust in your mouth. But like you do hear all these myths of like food, which like, by the way, I never want.

It's messy. It gets everywhere. It's disgusting. It doesn't improve my experience at all. But peanut butter. Girl, there was nothing else there. And organic, you know, that's like even worse. You got some smuckers, crazy ritchies.

Like that's thick. It's not even like some light whipped Peter Pan. Right? It's like the thicky, thick stuff. She had to stir it first. with the oil. Right, because the oil separates out of the good stuff. Oh, my God.

That is disgusting, girl. Your email was so funny, also I love the way our listeners write these emails. Okay, next story. Dori, for a play with a guy I've been hooking up with for about a month. Something fell out of his mouth before we were making out. It was dark, and I reached out and felt something. He didn't stop right away, so I was able to fill gaps between his teeth. Evidently, he wore some partial denture retainer thing, and it had fallen out.

He was a former MMA fighter, so it made the... sense, but neither of us addressed it, and he just popped that bad boy back in and continued to take me to O-Town. What if someone's tooth fell out while you were having sex? We've heard this. We heard this at last year's holiday live show? Or we heard this a live show before of the tooth falling out? Okay. We've heard this before. I feel like this happens. I mean, I have veneers. I understand, but like, I mean, my veneers aren't falling out, but like, yeah, MMA fighters. I mean, listen, that guy sounds like he's a good body. Yeah. So whatever, it's a tooth. Honestly, I think it'd be nice to take all their teeth out. I mean, like,

nice for like somebody going down on you? Oh my God. Okay. The last one. She says, four play gone wrong or is this weird. Okay. So I was talking to this guy years ago when we were making out and all of a sudden,

this is on brand making out and all of a sudden he blew into my mouth and made my cheeks blow up and everything. He blew you up like a blowfish. I was in shock. I stopped and said what the fuck was that? He played it off like it was normal. Please tell me that is not a normal thing because this has never happened to me before. Can you imagine?

And you're just like, blowing your cheeks up like a balloon breath in my mouth like that that is crazy would you rather have someone spit in your mouth or blow your cheeks up spit in my mouth all day long and like do you pause to acknowledge it like this is crazy just a picture and you're like you know but listen if you're into that not weird just if you're like blow my mouth can you that's so funny that's your dirty talk blow my mouth up that's your kink that you want to be blown up like a blowfish you say balloon I mean, nothing's weird if that's what you're into. You know, I'm into some weird stuff.

Okay, well, that is about it. I hope you guys liked our first full YouTube episode. This will be every single week from now on. Yeah. We're doing it. So what are you thinking? You're so good. Okay.

Okay. Say bye. See bye. You guys can find our product line, including the brand new massage oil and the blow gels and the lubs and the products. We have new products coming soon at vibes only.com. And you can download the app, Vibesonly app for iPhone and for Android, and follow along at Vives Only on Instagram. Girls Gottead Podcast.com.

Girls Got Eat Podcasts. On Instagram. I am Ash Hess on Instagram. TikTok, Twitter. Raina is reina. com got to eat on Twitter. And YouTube.com slash girls got to eat. We're back.

We're everywhere, baby. All right. Have a week. Guys. Bye. Bye. I don't know.