Girls Gotta Eat - Marrying Your Best Friend feat. Comedian Casey Balsham

Episode Date: January 6, 2020

Some love stories are crazier than others, and we have comedian (and friend) Casey Balsham on this episode to share her wild ride. It involves nearly a decade, a cross-country move, standup comedy, free hot dogs, and finally, a proposal. We're discussing falling for your friend and how to know if they feel the same, living/pooping together in a small space as a new couple, the frustration of not being engaged, fertility struggles, and more. We're also introducing a new segment about our listeners' near-death experiences, and catching up on a crazy NYE. We hope you enjoy! Follow Casey on Instagram @CaseFaceB and check out her album Son of a Barb. Follow us @GirlsGottaEatPodcast, Ashley @AshHess, and Rayna @Rayna.Greenberg. Check our website for tour dates and merchandise. Thank you to our partners for this episode: Siesta Key: MTV's Siesta Key is back on 1/7 at 8pm/7 CT. Follow @SiestaKey or go to Siesta Key on MTV.com. Fabletics: Get 2 leggings for only $24 at fabletics.com/gge. Postmates: Download the app and use code GGE for $100 of free delivery credit for your first 7 days. FabFitFun: Get $10 off your first box at fabfitfun.com with code GGE. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Like I said, and then we just kind of like settled into this thing where I was like, oh, this is somebody that I've known for now four years or three and a half, four years. We live together. We live together. It's a long con. It's a very weighted amount. Welcome back to another episode of Girls Got to Eat. First episode of the decade. First episode we've ever recorded before 3 p.m.

2.23. We're killing it. We're killing it. The two charade is back on 2020. We're recording earlier. First episode of the 20s. Oh, happy new. Guys. We made it. We made it.

We're going to look back on this world and be like, remember in the 20s? Remember back in the 20s? The whoring 20s. Nailed it. We'll get to it. Do you want to give a weather update? I feel like this is a beautiful day. I woke up. I was like, this is perfect. It's clear. It's sunny. Like 40-ish. Okay. We've allowed to talk about. Okay. You want to do the announcement? Just like, we came up with a name. I'm so excited. and you came up with the names. I want you to announce it.

But we named our 2020 tour for all of our upcoming cities. Yes. I mean. But you named it. Drum roll please. Raina, do a drum roll. Snack City, bitches. How about?

Snack City tour 2020. We're coming to your snack city. I just think every, like every, like we call everybody snack ads. Every city is like a snack city. Yeah. So like I'm really excited all the little snacks and we're going to. And I mean, yeah. And if anybody is out there is like a music producer and you want to make us.

a remix of Rack City to Snack City without any copyright infringements. Yeah, you buy the copyrights. We'll just take it. Oh, I like this. Yeah, I love it. I just want to be like Snack, snack, snack city, bitch. Yeah, I actually love this idea.

If somebody would do that for us, that would be great. Yeah. We are working on the last four dates of this tour. So I think 17 or 18 cities in the whole tour, but the last four dates, we'll get you guys the dates for the Pacific Northwest cities. Wait, like first half of the year. Is that what you mean?

Like through May. Through May. Yeah. But I mean, well, I don't, people always like, are you guys on tour? We're like, yeah, forever. And while you guys keep coming out. Like, we don't go out like a music act does. So I guess when we say Snack City, we just mean 2020.

Yeah, 2020. Okay. If you come to a show in 2020, it'll be a Snack City show. Yeah. Officially. We're in D.C. this week. And I'm so excited. I'm so excited this whole month.

D.C. and Boston. Boston. I can't wait. Really fun opening acts. The best opening acts. so amped. We're some stuff in L.A., which is coming up. That's getting close. And, yeah, Houston, Dallas, some Florida stuff left. We added a Philly show. The second show is not sold out yet. So lots of stuff. And then obviously, we have shows in Australia in February. We can't wait to be there.

Of course, we don't want to be insensitive and not bring up what's going on there, which is the horrible bushfires that are affecting the entire region and so much, so much so many lives have been lost. And so we wanted you to take a second and talk about that and give you guys some ideas of charities that you can contribute to. And hopefully when we're there, we can also be on the ground and participate some charities as well. Yeah. I mean, like this is so awful. And like I've read stats that like over half a billion animals have died. And you guys all know how I feel about Australian wildlife.

And I think it's this terrible thing of like reality of just like the planet dying in general. you know, and you just don't, I never once thought, this isn't about me, clearly. I never once thought that like we would go there. It's this trip I wanted to take my whole life and like I want to see all these animals and then they're just like dying. Like it's shocking to see like the images and the, I mean, the people are dying too. You know, it's just, I think been a couple dozen people have died, which of course is terrible too. But it's wiping out their land and their wildlife. It's so devastating. I know. It almost looks like it's not real. And you were saying before we started recording,

of course, there's, you know, things happening all over the world that that are horrible and that we would love to support and there's a million charities we would love to support but because we're going there we don't want to make it sound like it's all fun and games so we do really want to talk to you guys about charities you can donate it to and as I said while we're on the ground we would love to participate

in some wildlife charities and you had some idea you donate it actually yeah I donate to WIRS the Instagram is WIRES they just seem like a really good one all you guys were sending me this you can adopt a koala I'm sure they're all adopted I'm sure that all

70 or whatever adopted, but this was the alternative to that. A lot of them are all connected to. You know, like you go to one site and they're like, donate to this. I mean, the Red Cross is obviously somewhere you can always donate to. And people need aid too, obviously. And the Red Cross is great for that. But I just chose a wildlife rescue. You guys know off that passionately I feel about the wildlife of this country I've never been to.

So wires and you guys, I have a post on my Instagram right now. Some people were giving me some other ones. And we'll put some, there's some koala hospitals. New South Wales rural fire services is one together rising. I mean, this is all on Instagram and we'll put more on our Instagram as well, like in the story. And Rain and I are working on something else. We don't want to say anything quite yet because nothing's set in stone, but we've been throwing around ideas of how we can do another charitable thing too. And again, a lot of this is just because like we're going there in a month.

Like we are doing shows. We're visiting this country that is burning right now. And I just think it's important to note with all world crises that, you know, it's not just when it goes away, when the sensationalism, the news goes away, it's still important to keep donating and thinking about these things. Just because it's not in front of your face, because there will be problems there for months and years to come, of course. Yeah. I feel like a species are like in danger now.

It's like so heartbreaking. But anyway, come see us. We want you guys to come out. We want to hang out with you out where we're great night. We still have tickets left, I think, to one of the shows in Sydney and then in Melbourne as well. So you know what to do. And then stay tuned.

All of our Instagrams, girls got to eat me. and Raina of next steps of charitable efforts for Australia. Yeah, guys, thank you so much. Yes, thank you guys for listening and donating and all the things. I think the only other show we didn't mention was Tampa. We added a second night. So come party with us on Friday night too in Tampa and April. And that will be Girls'Gutty Podcast.com to get those tickets.

Can't wait to see you guys. All right, what are we talking about next? New Year's Eve. I hope you guys all had a great New Year's Eve. We had an unbelievable New Year's Eve. I got bullied into having a party. Did you? I didn't want to...

Did someone suggest you have a party? Melanie made me do it. Oh, Melanie made me. Yeah, that seems about right. I just feel like New Year's Eve sucks so much. Nobody ever does anything cool or fun. You get stuck at a horrible party or like some... I don't know.

Concerts are fun, I think. But like I've never had like a fish. Yeah, everybody... Drop ass and go to fish. What was the other one? The strokes were at the Barclays Center. Oh, yeah. I did see somebody go...

Yeah. I just know I have some friends that are like fish people that, like, go multiple nights in a row. It's crazy. No judgment. It's just I've never experienced it. It's not for me. Yeah. I'm not a big live music person anyways. But yeah, I had a party at my house. I got bullied into it. And then once I leaned in, I like really leaned in. I decorated the whole apartment. It looks so nice. I just, I got so much food, so much alcohol. I had a blast. It was so good. It was like honestly one of my favorite New Year's Eve's I've ever had. It was so fun. And I actually had a show that night, which I will, some of you guys came, if you're listening, lots of girls got to eat.

fans at this comedy show. I had at New York Comedy Club that hosted by Hannah and Remy, who have both put on the show. And that was one of my favorite crowds because that was like excited energy. It started at 6 p.m. No one's wasted yet. And everybody's like amped for the night out. It was like truly one of the best comedy shows I've done in so long because the energy was so, so great. So I've never done a comedy show in New Jersey. That's a fun thing to go to too. I would absolutely do comedy in years. Totally such a fun thing to do. And then went from there straight to your house. I walked in, right? It was like a full like live show outfit. She were black jumps in on. She had a headdress. Like a headdress. And

And she's just surrounded by 85 pounds of Ozatar food. They did. They sent, I went to pick it up, and he, like, could not stop giving me, give me two cases of beer. He gave me ice. He gave me so much food. It's, I mean, they cater all my parties. And then, Raina, she would, like, want to do a photo booth.

And you had ordered some, like, sequin thing that came from Amazon. It just, like, kind of looked like shit. And so all of a sudden, I don't know what I was doing, probably making drinks, not paying attention. And I see, like, gold streamers hanging from a door. way. I'm like, when did the photo booth get made? And you were like, I just went to CVS. You went to CVS and your outfit. Left your own party and got a photo booth. I know. I was sad. It didn't work out. I did. Well, somebody was like, I don't need a club soda. And I was like,

I'll just go to CBS. And so I just left my house and went to CVS. Yeah. And then came back and like decorate the photo booth. Okay. I need to talk what it happened at the end of the night. Okay. But also great lineup at the party. Tons of podcasts. Yes. Great lineup. We had tons of four parties. Remi was there. Hannah. Derek Pace for the Bachelor. Jeremy was, of course there. I try to get Chris DiStefano to come because we're a family. And he texted me, baby, I love you so much earlier the day. I was like, great, you'll come over and he's like, no, I have my daughter.

But I was like, okay, well, just tell her, I'm her stepmom and FaceTime me later. Yeah, guys, I was on this group chat too. And I was like, he texted us both. And he said, hey, family, are Dewey's legs? Okay, because he was like being stiff. And he was like something about Raina. And I was like, thank you so much. Dewey's just like probably not in a good place because his uncle Chris hasn't been around, whatever. And then I get in the shower and I come out to 13 DMs. I was like, God, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. I read it. It's

just them flirting back and forth. I wrote, how do you unsubscribe from a, from a DM chat? You can see yourself out of there, I think. Can you? I don't know. I enjoy doing it in front of you though. Like, I just like to write in quotes, Ashley has left the conversation. It makes me laugh. Because I think that you actually left the conversation. And I realized you just typed it. Then you realize you're just drunk. So he didn't come over. But, uh, okay. So the party was so fun.

It was just like, it was so fun. Like everybody there I loved. Like, I mean, your friends have now become my friends. But like so many like, so many your like A-list friends. Like people were in town.

Melanie was there. Lindsay was like, it was like my closest friends. No, but like it was really like 18 was there. We had Bobby Westside and Izzy. And I really don't remember how this happened because I was kind of drunk. But maybe you remember.

But bottom line, we basically had, open mic. Someone was like, Ashley, do stand up. And I was like, what? And so I just grabbed an empty champagne bottle and started doing jokes in like a voice, though. I was like mimicking myself doing my jokes from earlier in the night. I told like a really fucked up joke. I'm not going to tell it here because it'll live forever. But I had told a really fucked up joke about balls dropping, whatever. And I'm just like doing my jokes. And then everybody starts like heckling me. And I was like, I don't have to do this. And so then I was like, I'll call Hannah up.

And I was like, do you remember this? I was like, you guys have seen her on a Bravo. her house. You've listened to her podcast. Please welcome to the stage. Hannah Berner. And then Hannah goes up and she starts doing new material and I go, are you doing material? You're heckling her. We're all so drunk and you were like heckling her

for her material in the middle of a set. She did a full set. She was like, what else can I talk to you guys about? I'm like, Hannah, stop. This is a joke. And then Moreena goes up. You went up when you were like, oh, what should I talk about? People were laughing. I was so drunk. I don't know what I said. I was talking about how my neighbor

ghosted me. Yeah, Jeremy went up. I don't know. That was weird. It was great. I just, I love that it like spiraled into like telling your truth kind of thing. Because I feel like throughout the party, everybody's like segmented. People are in like my room.

People are on the kitchen. People were by the bar. Like, and then I feel like it was the only night. Everybody was like united around like a central place. We had a comedy show. We had a full blown open mic in your apartment. We were passing the mic back and forth. Derek Path refused to get up.

I was like, you'll cry on national television. But you won't do an open mic in my house. But I did. I adhered to our. to our motto, which we did not come up with, a listener came up with, but fuck more, cry less 2020. And I fucked in 2020. I fucked within like an hour and a half of 2020. I'm so proud of you. I haven't even masturbated yet in 2020. You're out here just full penetration. This guy came over. Okay, whatever. It's my neighbor. It's your neighbor. He came over and I kicked

everybody out. Well, here's why it worked for everybody. So no one had to help you clean up. Like, when he came in, I was like, oh my God, we get to leave. Like, we don't have to help clean up. Like, there's so much food and alcohol and trash everywhere. That's what, okay, because for my birthday party and my house warming, like, everybody walked out the door. My apartment was fully clean by the time everybody left for both of those parties. Because all of you guys helped me pack everything up. That's why.

Yeah, this guy came and we're like, everybody knows you guys about to fuck. We were like, see ya. Like, it was a mass accident's right. I did make him take out the trash with me before we fucked. Before? Before. Oh, my God. You can't make them do stuff after they fuck. That's true. I don't know. Oh, that's right. But you be like, get the trash on your way out. No, I made him watch the hype videos too.

I can't believe it. So that was my 2020. Did you go down with him to the trash room or you made him go alone? I went with them. Okay. It was a lot of trash. It wasn't because I was trying to be nice. It was just too much trash for one person.

Yeah. When he showed up, I was like, that's our cue. Fun cleaning this up, bitch. But least are getting laid. Yeah, I adhere to the motto. So 2020 started out strong. Also, I just feel like I want to say, we love crying.

I love crying personally. Always let it out. I feel like when we've said, fuck more cry less. It's like cry less over like stupid dudes. That's what I, that's what I assumed it meant. Yeah. I'm just going to like. Always let your tears out ladies. Big cancer energy over here. It's such like a sweet message. We just don't we want to support your crying. Yeah. I thought about bad shit. Okay. Speaking of guys, I just want to ask you this one question.

Oh my God. Rainy, you've been hyping this question. I know. It's not even that funny. I just have to, I need your opinion about this. So I've like, I've had a crush in this guy for a little while and I really like flirting with him, talking to him, whatever. This is a two-part question. He calls me dude all the time. And I'm like, nope, I'm like, does this guy, he can't be into me? Like, he calls me dude all the time. But then the other day, he was like,

I sent him a photo of something I was wearing and he was like, dude, you look so hot. And I was like, okay, so maybe he does want to fuck me. I don't know. Okay. And then I was talking to somebody else about it. And she's like, he's from California. That's why he calls you dude all the time.

And I was like, okay. I think dude is like so platonic. But then I was like, does he like me? Is he in me? But then yesterday, I got confirmation. Oh, God. Because he called me. bro. No. No. But he texted me on New Year's Eve. Happy New Year is at 1215. Okay. Does he like... I have so much to say.

I'm like, I'm so curious about what your feelings are about being called dude and bro. So many feelings. Okay. Two guys in my life, honestly, my two most serious relationships, both called me dude very early on and I shut it down immediately. Like immediately. Like the guy that I dated in college. and off and on for years to come after that. He is just that kind of guy. He's like a fish guy. Like, whatever it is. He's like, he's not from California,

but he definitely is those type of vibes. And I mean, I was like a senior in college and I remember feeling like just I knew, this guy already told me he liked me. We'd slept together probably at this point. And we were like dating and I was like, you cannot call me this. It's such a huge turn off.

I feel like you are repulsed by me as a woman. And then my other ex, he did it. I mean, I think we left our very first date and he somehow said it. And I was like, hey, just FYI. If you want to fuck me, you can't call me that. straight up said it to him. But like I'd already very much like laid all my cards on the table and been like my total self date one. And he rose to me a little bit about it.

And he was like the first time we have sex, I'm going to be like, I'm about to go, bro. And I was like, I will murder you. And he like, it was kind of a flirty thing because I was like, by the way, if you want to fuck a girl, you can't say that to her. And he was like, I very much want to sleep with you. But so that's what I'm saying is like it doesn't mean that they don't like you because these were guys that I dated. I just feel so like I just had to shut it down.

but you can't, you don't, you're not, you're not there with this guy. I've never hooked up with him. I just like flirting with him and he's like fun to talk to, but he called me bro. And I was like, oh, this is so bad. Bro, I've never. Bro so bad. Bro is so much different than dude. Right.

I'm like, that means, dude means like I might fuck you if I was drunk enough. Bro means like I wouldn't fuck you with someone else's dick. Yeah. So I'm very curious what girls think. But the guy in college I mentioned, I remember him calling me dude and I was like, please, you know, don't call me that. I went on a bitch about it, but I'm like, hey, just like, don't call me that. And he literally was like, what do you want me to call you?

I'm like, Ashley. And he was like, yeah, of course Ashley Ash, you know. But like, he was kind of like, kind of clueless, I feel like about relationships. And I was like, I don't know, you can call me girl, hey girl. And so he just would like be like, hey girl all the time. There's just like a buffet of other names. Anything he was like, he wasn't like a pet name guy. But he literally started saying he would like text me or call me, hey girl.

And then OIR had a song called Hey Girl. And so we put it on a mix CD that he made me a graduate. which was very cute. I like that he reinforced it with a joke. That was our song. I feel like if you're not fucking and someone calls you bro, you're not going to be fucking. Tell us if we're wrong, ladies.

Yeah. If you're a man's calling you bro, it's not for me. It's not for, I mean, I feel like it could be really funny if you're like in a serious relationship with somebody and they start calling you bro.

Not to me. But like it's not for me. Guys, I realize also this is probably my own shit. I don't know. I don't like being masculinized. I'm masking enough already. I think I'm just like insecure about it. I can't handle it.

I can't even handle it a little bit. I don't like it. Maybe it's because I'm wearing a bright orange hat. I know I look like a fuck boy. You look like a bro right now. I do. So I don't want to like, I just love this hat. Guys, we're going to wrap up this intro with some movie recommendations.

Entertainment recommendations. Yeah. Because I mean, this is the time when you're like staying in and bingeing and you want to go to movies and stuff like that anyway. Some girl to DM me asked you, she's like, I'm hungover. Do any recommendations of comedy specials? I'm like, yeah, I'm just here for you. Yeah. Here for your.

If you guys follow me on Instagram, I watch Dirty John. Cannot recommend it enough. I didn't even tell you this, Raina. I heard about Dirty John, obviously. I heard the name from you, maybe. Yeah, it was not a year ago when it came out. Yeah, it's not new. You guys know I don't watch anything new.

I thought it was like about a serial killer. I thought it was like Dexterish or something. I just never looked it up. I never Googled it, whatever. Clearly two seconds I could have figured out what it was about. Someone in our Facebook group, she wrote some long post about some sociopathic guy. And she was like, it was very like Dirty John. And I was like, wait, Dirty John's about like a sociopathicapapapapapap?

that someone's dating, sign me up. You didn't know. I thought it was about a murder because you love murder stuff. And I just, it is a little bit about murder. A little bit, but not really. Like, it wasn't really like about a serial killer about a murder.

It's very different. And so when I realized it was like, a woman like fell for like a sociopath guy, I was like, I can't wait to watch this. Watch it all in one city and all eight episodes. And you guys, like people were messaging me about it and like, oh my God, I've seen it too. You should listen to the podcast, all this stuff.

A girl DM'd me and goes, I wanted to watch it so bad. I woke up at seven to start binging it on New Year's Eve Day. 7 a.m. And I was like, that's a power move. And she goes, well, I was really sick. I was like, it doesn't matter. To wake up at 7 a.m. and start binging a show. What a day. I've never done that my whole life. That's a great day right there. Also, I have a morning movie. Binge that in a day. I would wake up like Christmas morning. I was so jealous when you watched it because I was like, I can't, but she gets to like live this for the first time. Guys, it's one of my favorite things

I've ever seen. I'm so glad you loved it that much. And I got a, I did like a little poll on my Instagram story about should I still listen to the podcast and most people said, yeah. I told it's phenomenal. And they interview every, it's a true story, which is why it's so crazy. It's like this whole story of like deception and theft and manipulation and it's crazy. And they interview her and her daughters and everybody except for him. Yeah. But they interview everybody and you don't really know what's going to happen. It's really wild. And my other ones, and I'm going to have rain at the floor because she has a lot to say.

Comedy special-wise, I forgot to say, I watched this a few weeks ago. Tiffany Haddish is special. I loved it. I've always rooted for her. I love the way it opens. I love the way her ending. If you guys are watching it, you have to, and you're like, I could turn this off. please wait to the very end. Her last joke of the night is this like physical comedy, but it's like one of the funniest parts. I just love it. I love her.

I love her like come back from kind of like bombing on her tour and all that kind of stuff. And she addresses it and it's like so wonderful. And then thirdly, Hustlers with J-Lo. We both saw it. We both saw it over the break. I,

we're going to talk about a female cast, but like hustlers kind of came out around the same time as Charlie's Angels and Charlie's Angels flopped and hustlers didn't. And I was like, yeah, shit. We don't want a woman ghostbusters. We don't want Charlie's Angels for the fifth time. Like, new shit. Right.

Ocean's 11, but with women. We don't want it. I don't want it. And I think they're like, well, but men, men can have the same movie over and over. Men can have Batman every year. And I'm like, yeah, because men are dumb. And their bars lower. Like, if you want to have all female cast, female, like, we need, our bar of quality is higher. And

hustlers hit it for me, like, all female cast. Like, not even a male supporting actor that I can even think of. And I love the story. I love, I mean, it's take place in New York. It's about scores and a real true story too. I love the acting. J-Lo has always been one of my idols and in a lot of ways. That ass is my idol. Oh my, not a stitch of cellulite. Raina goes, how can J-Lo look like this? And I was like three things. She's not white. She doesn't drink and she's rich. That's all you need. That's all I need. But I'll never achieve that.

White people don't get to look like that. No, you can't. I mean, no. And we drink. And I drink a lot. And I don't work out. Really, I don't do anything that she does. Why don't I look like that? But you know what? When I hit all those marks, you better watch out. But anyway, you loved it too. I had like the week between Christmas and New Year is like what happened? It was like every day was Sunday.

You were just in a movie theater for a week. All I died I saw movies every day. You had to leave my family's home because you were so busy. You had to rush back to New York to go to movies. I rushed you out of bed. You were taking a nap and I made you get up to record the podcast so I could leave your parents' house so I could, watch movies in New York for a week.

I was like, Ashley, can you get up from your 11 a.m. nap? God, I love an 11 a.m. That was a strong power move. I, like, felt so bad waking you up. And then your brother was like, it's 11 a.m. He's like, she's out of rough day. When I'm at the farm, Dewey wakes me up at like 8 a.m. every morning. I couldn't believe it.

You woke up before me both mornings. I wake. He wakes me up because he wants to go play with his friends. And then I have to take a nap at 11 a.m. Okay, I've made a checklist. Every year I try to see all the Oscar noms. I love that. So cute. But I look it up on variety and I just see like who's going to win.

And so then I just like make a list and I check them off. So I saw I'm going to read to the list, but I'll make a list and check it twice. I saw Marriage Story, the Irishman, bombshell, Jojo Rabbit, Uncut Gems, Knives Out and Hustlers. Jeez. I really like some of these are like, I'm so confused. I feel like movies are like have changed so much where like some of these are just straight up on Netflix. So the reason why the Irishman and the marriage story were only in so. some theaters, but mostly on Netflix.

They wanted to release them on Netflix. But in order to be a contender for an Oscar, you have to be released in a theater. Like Martin Squiss says you did not want to release this at all in theaters, but they wanted to be a contender for the Irishman I'm talking about. People are just out here saying talking to theaters? Yeah, pretty much. Do you think movie theaters are done?

Do you think see a movie is out is like done? No, I really, I think that there's just some movies that you have to see in a theater. Like, I just think that theatrics of some things are so incredible on a big screen. You can't possibly have the same experience at home. Like think about like Harry Potter on your television. Yeah. Not all, you know, human emotion type of his marriage story didn't need to be in a theater. It's just about two people in the dissolution of their marriage.

Like that doesn't need to be. But I saw a bombshot. I felt very moved by it. Like if you guys don't know about it, it's about Roger Ailes, who's the head of Fox News, and basically all these sexual harassment cases that he got hit with by multiple people at the network before he worked there after, et cetera, et cetera. And he ended up actually dying after they accused him of it, like almost immediately. but I just love that there's like movies today about like women being mistreated in the

workplace and I'm glad that like we didn't just stop with this like hype about like the Me Too movement and then just move on to something else like I think it's really important to show that this like still happens all the time in corporate America these are really important stories to tell and I just I love that like in pop culture we sell the actresses that want to be a part of this I think it's like really important to always talk about the fact that like women are victimized and it's not women that are my age it's women that like are so young that they don't have like career options. They don't have money. Like a man just says, like, show me your tits. Like, what are the decisions you have? And like, I think that it's really

important to talk about how like hard these decisions are to make. And, you know, why didn't you tell anybody or why didn't you say no? And it's just like the psyche behind somebody who accepts those type of scenarios. I think it's important to like always be telling those stories. So I thought, I mean, the movie was pretty true to like what actually happened. I read a lot about it. But yeah, I just, I think it's really important to always be telling these stories and communicating to women that like, you can say something. thing and just behavior does not need to be tolerated. Right.

Yeah. I thought it was just like a great movie. I thought I mean, the actresses are all phenomenal in it. Yeah, because you learn a lot when you're younger, you learn a lot from TV and movies. So like the more you see these things in TV and movies, the more you're like, oh, well, that isn't acceptable and that's how I should respond on these situations and stuff like that. Right. When I was 19, I had this, like, boss that you stuff about in the show, but he used to, like,

press up against me and touch me all the stuff. And I don't even know that I, like, I had the verbiage at that age to even know, like, what was happening. I knew I didn't like it, but I didn't know that you were allowed to tell anybody. Who was I going to tell? Yeah. You know, so I think it's just, this kind of stuff's really important. I'm excited for you to see it. I think it would be very fired up. And that's why I love hustlers, because they were drugging men taking their money. Minimizing the wage gap. No. Also, Cardi B. Anyway. I love the shoes in that movie. I love it so much. I'm going to

see bombshell for sure. That's amazing. Marriage story was phenomenal. Knives Out was phenomenal. The Irishman, if you like, that kind of stuff is great. It's long. But so was binging a whole series in a day? Yeah. That's my movie review. Okay. Maybe we'll talk more in depth. We're like running long.

We'll talk more in depth before the Academy Awards. Oh, yeah. We can give out her awards. We'll actually do awards. Uncut gems. Worst movie of the year. Sorry. Uh-oh.

Also, Tiffany Hage, I forgot to say the name of the special. It's called Black Mitzvah. It's great guys. Actually, I've watched it too. I didn't get to say that while you were talking. But I meant to back you up. It is really, really a great special. I just forgot to give the name.

All right. Should we get into with our guest today? Yes. Okay, we are super excited to have this girl in the studio with us today. She is a stand-up comedian. You can see her as a regular in clubs all over New York City. She's a great comedy special. It's called Son of Barb.

Ashley and I were actually there for the taping of it. It's phenomenal. And you guys have heard her as the co-host of Not Another True Crime podcast. Please welcome to the house studio with us and Dwey, Casey Ballsham. Hi, guys. Hi, thanks for having me. This is exciting. Son of a Barb.

What did I call it? Son of Barb. You know I wrote Son of a Barb. I read it directly from the thing and I was like, No, I'm just not going to do it. Like son of a bitch. Oh, yeah. This is just my life's work.

It's fine. You can mispronounce it. It's just everything I've ever referred. No, but it just is a comic with the last name like Balsham. People say whatever they want on stage. So just like whatever intro I ever get, I'm like, I'll take it. I just recently started asking for the stand to pronounce my name right on my own show. So finally I said, hey guys, I know it's my show.

You know, if you could just bring me up with Heseltine, that would appreciate it. I would love that. I would love that. Yeah. And then I told them and then another guy announced me and the message didn't get received and he said Hesselstein. So he went, so he went not only the rock. He looked at Jew and he was like, she's a Jew. She's a Jew.

She really viewed it up. She looks like she does taxes on the off season. It was funny that it was the first, it was like the first time I asked and they bertured it more than they ever had before. Yeah. They made it more Jewish. That's so funny. And it was right before Christmas. I was like, this is fine.

Hessel Steinberg. They think I don't care. Robbie was telling me, Robbie my boyfriend, his last name is spelled. Is he not your fiance? Oh, he's my fiancé. I just hate the word.

I hate the word. I hate the word. It sounds like you do, like what you do to vegetables. It sounds like Beyonce though. Yeah, kind of. It sounds pretentious though.

Like when you first start saying, it's like, oh, my fiance, he's like, shut up. Yeah, I'm not like. You have clout because if not you just am a boyfriend. I know. I don't have any of those things.

I know. Good for you. It just makes me feel so like, my fiancee? Like, it feels like I should be wearing a blazer and I'm not, you know, so I feel say. My fiance! Like, it just feels like we, you know, live in a penthouse and we live in Queens.

You got good style, girl. Every time I've seen you, I've commented to Ashley. Every time you do stand up, I'm like, why don't I wear outfits like that? Oh, you guys are kind. I know. You always have a look. Like, you wear that head wrap. I'm like, I can't do this.

Oh, thank you. Because I literally, when I leave the house, like, I look at the mirror and just go, I kiss. Like, I really like everything I put in my body. I'm like, what were you on? But no, but Robbie's last name is spelled. spelled S-L-O-W-I-K. So it's spelled Slovak, but it's pronounced Slovak because Jew and all that.

But he was on Conan and he's like, I didn't even think to tell them to pronounce my name right. On Conan. It's like, Robbie Slovak. Okay, Conan should ask. I'm sorry. We fucking ask on this podcast. Conan doesn't know to ask.

That's crazy. I know. Braina asked you five minutes ago. I know. I can't ask Robbie how to say anything. I know. I just think we're so used to be. I'll definitely come do your show.

Yeah, yeah. Anyway. You can call me literally this dumb bitch. I don't care. I'll go on. Conan, you can call me anything you want. But I'm glad you brought up your boyfriend, your fiance. Fianca.

Because we're going to talk about a bunch of stuff with you today. She can be engaged in France, though. You are pretensions. Stop, it was in a Holocaust Memorial Garden. It wasn't that special. It wasn't. Raina doesn't know this. Oh, my God.

I know this from the show. We did that time. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. There's a whole. He thought Holocaust and proposal. This is what I'm going to do.

No, he was going to propose the night before in Myanmar, and it was like misting and we were by ourselves on these like, beautiful streets around these giant houses and I was on my phone. So he didn't do it. And he was like, I know what'll be better. Yeah. That is 100% why someone's not going to propose me. They're going to be like, you're on your phone.

You're on your phone. He's like, yeah, he's like you were obsessed with finding out when this other cabaret opened for another trip that we haven't even planned to take to Paris because I was like, oh, we missed it this time. You guys have a backup trip to Paris during your Paris. He's a fiance. Yeah, my fiance. So we just, like, that's what he was like, I was like, I want to

what time this place opens and he was like trying to propose and I was just like, excuse you, I'm on my phone. This will happen to Ashley. That would happen to be a hundred percent. Actually, I had a fight because she was on her phone at a restaurant. We made everyone the restaurant uncomfortable. Yeah, we got to right. That will have to you.

That is like a meme almost. It's like, babe, we've been together for seven years. Why am you proposed? He's like, you're on your phone. Yeah, truly. No, it was literally I went, what? Like, I was in a cute outfit. Like we were going to see Loulon Rouge.

Like we were on our way to Mulan Rouge. I bought this like trench coat at this like, French thrift store that like smelled awful because it definitely needs to be washed but I was like I'm wearing it. I had the beret on like I felt cute. The next day when we actually got engaged. You looked like a fiance. I hadn't even showered. Thank you. You were ready to be proposed to. I was ready. Yeah. And the next day I like hadn't even showered.

I had on a purple puff vest and a green sweater. Like he literally was somebody proposed to me in that outfit. You got proposed to in a puffer vest? He literally was like you look like a kindergarten teacher. Please stop this. And I was like, what? I was complaining about how bad my legs hurt. Like it was the last day of a 10-day trip. I was like, can we just sit down? I'm like, can you just fucking follow me, you dumb cunt?

Like, I'm trying to goddamn propose to you. And I was like, he worked cut into the proposal. I was like, my beret is too tight. I need to eat. Do we get a tea? You know, I was so terrible. I am so glad that you're here to talk about this. Getting proposed to in a bad outfit is real. Terrible.

Like, I was like, that's what I'm trying to tell the joke about it. I'm like, you think you're going to be wearing makeup or your hair's going to be done. Like, no, you will be. I fully went to the bar at a restaurant. after I got proposed to you and painted my own nails. I knew there was a lot of photos coming. I like paused the situation or went to the bar and paid my nails. Should we talk about you more?

Do you want to talk about yourself? You want to tell us like about yourself? Wow, Rayna. Do you want to like say anything or whatever? Let me see. I'm Aquarius. I love cheese. I love Broadway shows.

I love going out by myself. Yeah, that's perfect. That's me in a nutshell. That's enough. If you see me in the streets, I'm by myself. I'm, my New York's... But not in the sheets. No, not in the sheets.

I'm usually with Robbie. Yeah. Sometimes he's asleep next to me and I'm in the sheets, you know. Do you masturbate when you're in bed with him? Yeah, because sometimes I need to go to sleep. And he's asleep. Right. What's he going to do?

And also sometimes I just don't want, like, sometimes, like, I love sex, but sometimes I'm like, I don't want to deal with all of it. It's a lot. Yeah. So I wait for cleaning up and all the things. All of it. You wait until he's snoring now? I hear the little breathing.

Yeah. And then I'll just kind of... But it's also, like, I do it so, so, like, stiffly and quietly, that, like, it's just barely, like, a movement, like a fucking corpse, just, like, you know, it's just, it's wild. Has he ever broken? I think once or twice, and I think, because there was one time, like, maybe I was a little drunk or something, and I felt his arm, like, come over, and I just, like, froze, like,

he knows. And then I was just, like, like, did, like, the fake sleep. I can imagine him being like, oh my God, this is hot. He like tries to get it on. You're like, no, no, no, no. This isn't about you. This isn't about you. Yeah, exactly.

You misread the situation. Please don't get involved here. Invite only. RSVP list you had to do it yesterday. I don't think this is crazy. I'm just fascinated about it because I've never done it. Like, there's no reason why I wouldn't do it. Like, I'm fucked with other people in the room.

So I would masturbate. Yeah, it's fine. It's like, yeah, it's just one of those things. Sometimes it helps me sleep sometimes. For sure. Yeah, it's just sometimes they get all horned up and I don't really want anyone there. And then when you share your room and your bed with somebody, it's like, well, absolutely. I would have done this until I was alone.

So here we are. I did that one time we shared the bed in Chicago. You were masturbating? Is that why you put the barrier between us to that pillow? I actually did put the pillow forward up to so I could masturbate. You were like, she won't notice if I put a pillow between us. It was like a headrest pillow. Perfect.

Okay. So you guys, didn't, you weren't you living somewhere else when you met? You used to live in L.A.? Yeah. So me and Robbie met in L.A. We met doing mics. he's also comics we met doing mics and it was really funny because we actually

like I kind of like had a crush on him like I kind of liked him a little bit but I was also kind of seeing like this other comic at the time and then I remember it was ended up being this like really very dramatic thing that like then Robbie was like well I like you and I was like oh I want to break up with this guy and then those two

had a like had a very madame talk no they doled it out for you like almost essentially and this one guy was like I love her and I was like you don't Like this is not a truth thing. You were the peanut gallery during the fight. You were like, prove it.

Yeah, I was like, buy me, stop. And then, no, I didn't say that, but, you know what I mean. But no, but, like, we all were, like, at a party one time. And, like, I would, like, make out with Robbie while, like, the other guy was in the room. Like, it was really, like, there was this, like, weird little thing. And we drunkenly hooked up once. And it was just, I remember, so sloppy and so funny. And I was like, oh, my God, this is very silly.

and then afterwards we're like, okay, we like we like, I remember he gave me this whole like hubbabaloo, hubbub, what is the word? Huggabab. Hullabab. Hullabaloo. Also, like, how long ago was this? This was like, 10 years ago? Eight or nine years ago.

Right. You guys have been together for a significant amount of time. We've been together six years. Yeah, we've known each other for almost 10. Okay. So he gave me this whole like thing. He like read me the whole thing about like, well, this is what happened my last. Like he literally, I think sat me down in a car for like 30 minutes and sat me down in a car.

We weren't standing in the car, but we were in a car. He was like, get in the fucking car. Because in L.A. It was a Hummer Limo. We were standing. No, in L.A., all your conversations happened either in a parking lot or a car. That's just that. 100%.

Oh, really? 100%. Yeah. So we were just in a car and he was like, telling me about this old relationship. And I was like, what the fuck is it? So are we going to date or not? And he didn't date me. So, like, he thinks it's because of one reason.

He thinks it's because I liked someone else. And I was like, you rejected me. Like, you know, so of course I just moved on to other crushes and other things and hooking up with other people. When you say you weren't dating, you mean like you guys were hooking up regularly, but he would take you want to date? Like, what do you mean by dating? No. Like we hooked up.

We did this thing. I broke up at the other guy and I was like, okay, I'm ready to date. And he kind of was like, I'm not going to date you. Like don't break up. Like I like, I like this whole thing where he's like, I have a lot of baggage. I'm still working through things. And I was like, okay. So that's a mission for you.

Which I feel like everything you're saying is negating what we usually talk about in this podcast. Because if we said a guy would say that to a girl would be like, he doesn't like. you run and you're like, no, we're married. We're not. We're engaged. I know. Sometimes it just takes a little time. I like this message, too.

Okay, so how did you guys come back from that? So essentially, we just, we're still friends. And actually, we kind of were like not great friends after that, again, because he thinks I was like doing something else. And I was just kind of felt a little rejected by this guy that was like, I like you, but I'm not going to date you, but blah, blah. And I was, I just, I remember being really confused, kind of being like, huh? And then, you know, when that happens, you start to look at somebody at difficult.

away because then I started to look at him and I was like, oh my God, I can't believe I liked you. Oh, it didn't make you like him more. For me, I'd be like, I'm obsessed for me. For me, I'd be like, you don't like you. Yeah, it kind of became this thing where then like, then I was just so turned off. But we remained like friends the whole time in L.A. and then kind of towards the part of we all visited New York together and it kind of became this thing, me, him and our other friend Amy, as he had always said to me, he's like, I always feel like me and you take comedy a little

seriously, a little more serious than our friends. So like, I think we should move to New York. And I was like, this is great. And we visited and all that stuff. And then we started getting it. It was still as a friendship thing. But on the way to like starting to move, like me and him would like, we'd always, we'd go like see movies together or like go out to eat or like, like, we kind of were like going on these weird dates that weren't really dates because we were just friends. Yeah, because we didn't fuck. We didn't kiss. I didn't think of it. Like I just thought of it as like a really deep friendship. But I remember all these people were like, oh, you guys are going to move to New York. You're going to follow him. love, blah, blah, blah, blah. And I was like, oh, my God, gross. Have you seen his jeans? Like, they're gross. You know, like, I just, like, I just thought he was like this nerd friend.

But people were like, he's courting you. And I was like, I don't think that's what it is. Like, I pay for my own stuff. You know, like we're, we're just friends. And then, sure enough, we, you know, we drive cross country together. And it's like, and I was like dating someone. Yeah, it's like, I mean, I slept through, I think, three states, but like I didn't even drive once. But we. Sounds like a boyfriend. Yeah. It's, it was like a very, uh, intimate thing to do. But I was like dating someone before we left L.A. and I was still kind of talking to him.

And then we actually met, we did a show in Denver and this guy flirted with me in Denver. And I remember him telling me later on that like he felt a little like, whoa, like he felt a little jealous of it. And then the rest of the ride, like, because we were like having to pull over into these weird hotels to like stay as we were getting to New York. And there was just like a little bit of cuddling and some other stuff. But I was like still a little bit like, you're my friend, and I don't know how I feel about this. And plus I was still dating the other guy. And now there was this new guy from Colorado that I was kind of like texting and flirting with. So there was like a lot of things.

And then we essentially got to New York after five days on the road. Oh, God. We didn't have beds. So we all had made a plan to just get hammered because we were like living in Hell's Kitchen around this corner from Rudy's. It was like $3. Free hot dogs. Hot dogs. Yeah.

Free hot dogs. Five dollars beer in a shot. Yeah. Say no more. Yeah. And we were like, well, we have to get hammered because we don't have a bed. And we just got hammered. And then I like, should we make out?

And he's like, for sure. And then we just like made out. And then that kind of like, we were just kind of like sporadically made out for the whole like for like a week or two. Drunk always. Like do you guys drink? Well, that at that time like Robbie's not a huge drinker. But I think because he was like trying to like play with me. And he hadn't started his job yet.

And we were like just in limbo. Like we're like, there's no couch. There's like, it's like a weird, you know, when you just move between Christmas and New years. The energy is just crazy. Like what is going on? This is a lawless place. Nobody knows what to do.

Yeah. Everybody's just like, this is, I stand in the middle of everything, right? And you're like, no, fucking just move and eat and breathe like you normally but nobody gets it. So that's how, yeah, our apartment was just this like weird like thing coming together. So we would go out and drink and then I'd like sneak into his room and we kind of do this thing. But at the same time, I was also like, he left town and there was a guy I used to hook up with

from L.A. came into town that I, like, hooked up with. And then also another guy, the guy from Colorado was coming to, like, visit. And I kind of had already made plans to, like, see him. So it became this. Yeah, you had them all. It became, yeah, it became this like weird. For sure.

Like, literally, I could go like six months with nobody. And then like one night, like three people will be like, am I your suitor? You know, and you're like, what the fuck is happening here? Were you like in your head? Like, should I be fucking my friend? Like, or were you just like, I'm just going to let it ride? It was just, I was having.

a hard time getting over the fact that it was my friend. Like I was kind of like, this is really weird. And roommate? Which is wild. Your story is crazy. And now we're living together with somebody else. Right. Plus I'm like still kind of dating this guy in L.A.

This other guy's coming to visit and like all this stuff. So I remember we had kind of been, we hadn't fucked yet, but we had kind of been making out and I like, essentially we were also doing everything together because we didn't know New York. And so we were like hanging out one night at like this club and I was like, okay, I'm going go and he's like, where are you going? And I was like, well, I kind of have a date. And he's like, okay, well, I hate it, but I mean, we don't have a title or anything yet. And I was like, okay. And so, okay. And so I went and I hung out with this other guy and we like kind of made out.

And then I got home at like 3 a.m. and he was just wide awake in his bed. I knew it. Wide awake. Waiting up. Waiting up. And I just walked into his room and he just like opened up the covers and like I got in. What is this movie? I feel like, you're like, it's your shift now. Yeah, it's like, I was like, you know, we didn't talk about it. It was just kind of like, okay,

this is what's happening. And then, and then it just like, I think Amy went out of town and left us alone for like two weeks in the apartment. And then that's when things kind of like, fuck city.

That's what things went down, where we were just kind of like, okay, let's test this out. Like he's the first person that I ever had an orgasm with oral sex. And I think it was just because I was like, oh, I trust you. Yeah. I feel like this is, I don't feel comfortable.

Because I feel like oral sex is so much that thing. Well, for me, it was like, oh, I don't want to make you wait. It's okay. We can just fuck. Like, it's okay. Like, so I never actually let myself enjoy it because I was like, just come up. It's fine. Yeah, yeah.

Don't bother down there. I think a lot of girls are like that. I was like that for a long time too. Like, do you, like I will masturbate to giving a blowjob. Like I really like giving a low sex. But I think a lot of guys are actually like that. We just don't know it. I just have never felt like that.

I'm like, stay down there. See, I just never felt, I think I just always had such low self-confidence when it came to the people I was hooking up with because, I mean, clearly, it was like a lot of wrong people that don't make you feel good. And it was a lot of, like, for me, sex for the whole first part of my life was just being, being like, this is something guys want. Like, I didn't even have orgasms for like the first five years that's having sex until I finally started masturbating.

I was like, ha ha, I found it. I found it. Yeah. Well, it's funny. I joke about that because there was a guy that did that. We, like, hooked up a couple times. I'm not going to say his name, but you know who he is. But we hooked up when I moved here.

We were like a couple times. And then he was like, do you like me? What's going on here? Like we've always been friends. And then now we hooked up. So what's the deal? Like it wasn't like a what are we situation. He was like, yeah, I do like you.

I just am not in a place to date somebody. I travel all the time, blah, blah, blah. And then that was just kind of it. We actually had a conversation about it a couple weeks ago about what happened there. He was like, I did like you. I just like travel the time. But I mean, now he's a girlfriend. So Robbie, like,

when he was saying he didn't want to date you he wasn't dating anybody else right no he wasn't no he was always like he was just like I need to not date anybody right like he was not a flusy at all like I mean he's not one of those guys it's like I don't want to date in one and then just like fucking ever like yeah like exactly I know of maybe like two people he made out within like the three years that we lived in L.A like it almost felt like he was saying if I'm going to date somebody it's going to be you but I just can't right now yeah so in your mind were you like I really I'm asking this I'll get to the reason why but like were you like I really want to date this guy I'm just waiting around so I'm to make him jealous or it didn't really not occur to you.

No, like at that time, when he told me, like, he didn't, he wasn't going to date me. It was just kind of like, all right, well, we're moving on and I feel rejected. And so I'm going to just move on. And then, yeah, and then I went through that phase where I didn't like him. But then when we got here, he wasn't even on my radar to date anymore. Like it was literally like, even as we were like making out sometimes, I'd be like, no. No. There's not.

And then, like, like, I said, and then we just kind of like settled into this thing where I was like, oh, this is somebody that I've known for now four years or three and a half, four years. We live together. We live together. It's a long con. You're really waded in a mouth. Yeah, truly. I was like, uh-huh. You're like, I'm just going to, here's what I'm going to fuck a whole ton of other guys. I'm going to make him move across the world with me, move in with me. Yeah. Then I'm going to date him. I mean, like, Robbie had, like, I'd been at parties with Robbers where he'd see me like go home with douchebags and be like, what are you doing? Or like, sometimes we'd like hang out the next morning. I'd be hung over. I'd be like, some guy spit on my face, you know, and he'd be like, what the fuck is wrong with you?

Like, he knows, he knew every part of me in and out. gross, disgusting night, like all this stuff. And, like, was still, like, I choose to still get involved with you. And so you're like, okay, well, we're doing this then. And you're getting all of that shit. Like, we're all in agreeance. I liked what you want about this. And Ashley and I had Mark Manson on the show in, like, May.

He does a lot of relationship counseling. And I was, I was, like, so in love with this guy who was a friend of mine. And I was like, can you ever make your friend, your boyfriend? And Mark Manson was like, not on purpose. Like, you just have to go live your life. and like, and maybe they'll get jealous and that'll make them want to be with you,

but like there's no way to like manipulate something. It sounds like this is just like what you did. You just went and lived your life. It was just, yeah, it was like not even a thing. And it is so, like sometimes like as I was like

putting out like wedding invitations, I was like, I can't believe I'm fucking marrying Robbie. Like I'm like texting my friends being like, I'm marrying Robbie. Yeah. And they're like, I know. I love Josh.

Yeah, exactly. That's, I mean, it's when I look back, like now I can't even remember when we weren't together. But there was like a solid year and a half that I was like the first time we went back to LA around our friend. Like it was also really, I will say it's about dating a friend. Like it was nice to not be around the people that knew us as friends. Like we started our relationship here.

So anybody that met us here knew us as a couple. So I remember the first time going back around our other friends as a couple. I was really skittish. Like I was very much like, like, wasn't sure how to like, canoodle in public yet. That's interesting. Yeah, it was weird because it was around all of our closer friends that we just all hung out with as like

a crew and now it's like oh, we fuck now. And like, surprise. This is the new this is the new us. Yeah. I'd like this piece of advice though, kind of. Like if you like a guy and like it's in your friend group like do stuff outside of the norm of the friend group because like it just reinforces that you're just buddies

when you're in the friend group. Yeah. Yeah. We're going to take another very quick break to talk about other partners from this episode and we're going to get back into how you can make your friend fall in love with you like Casey. I've fallen for some of my guy friends in the past. Totally. Like you just do. If the lines start to get blurred a little, I think sometimes, I think a lot of women deal with this. Like, oh, fuck, am I in love with my friend? And then years down the road, you're like, how did I ever think that? Oh, yeah. Or you're with them and you're engaged like you guys. But I think the number one way to know if they have feelings for you is how they react to you with other guys. It's the, because if you have a guy friend that does feel the same way, he's going to get jealous. he just is 100% and if he doesn't at all. And he's like, oh, cool, tell me about your date. That's awesome.

You should date this guy, blah, blah, blah. You're like, you don't like me. It's like the number one indicator. And it's the only way to tell. Yeah. Well, you have to make them feel like they can lose you. Because otherwise you're just, they have you available to them all the time. Absolutely.

And like for women, I think so much, like, I'm like this. I mean, you know, I was like so in love with one of my best friends like four years ago. You're like, this is an attractive person. We think the same stuff is funny. We have the same, like, morals, beliefs. We like, so much fun. And they're never going to take that step unless they are threatened with losing you. Absolutely.

No, because I've definitely had crushes on other people that have abused it, have been like, oh, I know I can get this person. I can tap into this part of this person that I know cares about me and not really have to give anything in return. So it feels like there's parts of it that feel very like you're being used. Like when you're like the unrequited lover, especially if it's like a friend. Like it just feels really kind of like they are asking for the parts of you that they're not willing to give to you. And that's like so frustrating. We talk about this all the time.

That's what happened to me. We just think that sometimes like we have these guys that like they have these great conversations with us and we enjoy the same thing. And yeah, I guess you can draw your own boundaries though. Because I told Rainer recently where I, I've run into this before and then I'm like, I don't know. I don't really want to, I don't know if I really like them like that either. Like I'm just I'm getting a lot from this too. Like I have guys that like prioritize me and they're there for me and they make me laugh and these things and I'm kind of getting something from it too. Yeah. I think as long as you're not the sole emotional, you're not the emotional part of like taking care of somebody else and I think all relationships are fine. But if you become the person that then

has to take care of somebody emotionally when they don't want to like give you the same thing, and that's when you have to be like, okay, there's, there's an imbalance here that I don't feel comfortable with. I feel like I'm giving a lot of myself and I'm not getting. Yeah, but I feel like you're getting. Like if somebody's like equally matching what you're giving, I think that that's great. And even if it's not like a love thing, if you still feel like it's a balance. But I feel like when you start to feel like you're like, oh, I'm doing a lot of the heavy lifting here. And I feel like, because I think guys sometimes they lean on their girlfriends because guys don't communicate the same way. So they want to lead on you with their emotional issues

and all this stuff. But if you can do that with them, great, you're equal. But like if you can't call them in a crisis, then fuck that friendship. Or if you're like kind of forgo other romantic relationships. and I feel like that's what I did, like this guy four years ago. Like, I feel like he served every part of my needs. I was, like, so obsessed with him and in love with him. He's my best friend. I wanted to talk to all the time. We just weren't sleeping together, but he served every other need.

I didn't date anybody else for that whole year. Yeah. Because I was with him every day. We're hanging out every day. We, like, professionally, like, worked together a lot. It still takes you off the market of it. I mean, absolutely. It just, like, took me off.

I mean, I was sleeping with other people. I was dating other people. Because you were, like, emotionally invested in this other person. Right. But he probably slept with other people. and I probably, like, he was getting all of this support and, like, fun. Like, I was getting nothing from this other than, I guess, friendship. Yeah, I don't know.

I just think that's a message I want to send across the board. It's like, do you feel like you're getting the same thing? Are you giving too much and not getting anything in return? I also feel like it gets muddy when, and this has just happened to me so many times, and I feel like it's a female thing again because we're nurturers that, like, just because a guy tells you a personal thing about him, it's like not, like, we then, like, I'm like, oh, but he told me that his mom's really sick. And, like, we, I think, use that as a thing to be, like,

well, he's sharing with me. So this is, that's the false closest. And that's, like, something that is just so, like, where I think we are always led down the wrong path. Because guys will dump on you. Like, they will, like, I, shit on your chest. I think, like, it happens so much with, with men,

because they don't do it as much with their guy friends. I just don't think it's fair. And I think that probably you see this more in work relationships for somebody as, like, a work wife. We're, like, they do use you for emotional support. And then what you say, send them back to their girlfriend, a better person at the end of the day, lighter and easier. And that girl gets their money and their time and sex with them.

And what did you get out of it? That is so true. No, you get a pat on the back and being like, you're such a good friend. And you're like, I don't, I have friends. I had a situation like that with somebody. And again, it was strictly platonic. Nothing ever happened. But he had a girlfriend.

And he wanted to like hang out with me all the time and share all this, like, serious personal stuff. And then I was like, this isn't fair. It's so true. I never even thought about it like that. I can see that situation where, yeah, this guy, you're the best girlfriend. Yeah. And he dumps all this shit on you. And then, yeah, when he doesn't need to do it to his real girlfriend, she's like, he's great.

He has no emotion issues. Yeah, he's perfect. I can't believe how happy and well adjusted he is. His family's fine. He's like, no, they're not. It's a slippery slope. And I think the guys that do that will do something with you or they'll create a situation where they don't talk to you about their girlfriend.

Yeah. Like, absolutely. This guy's just like, I knew he had a girlfriend. He lives with this girlfriend. Yeah. And like, he just. never brought her up. And I started to realize that, like, it's a crazy thing that you live with somebody. You're not talking to me about her at all. Like, you are doing this on purpose. And you are creating a situation where I just don't think about the fact that you have a partner. Yeah. And then it gets really confusing because then you, like, I don't know, were you like, do I have feelings for this guy? Like, we're clearly connecting. Of course, that's how I felt. Yeah. Of course it crossed my mind. And him and I, thankfully, I didn't put myself in situations where we were like alone late at night drinking. Because it's just like, I think that that's just like a bad scenario. And I wouldn't want my boyfriend alone late at. night at a bar with somebody either. And so I wouldn't put myself in that scenario. But like,

yeah, I mean, I started to realize. I mean, Ashley realized it's, your friends can always realize this stuff. Oh, they see. But yeah, he omitted the girlfriend staff. And you're like, oh, this is a manipulation. Absolutely. Right. Yeah. It's such a sticky. Sorry, we took this turn. We don't expect. No, that's okay. And I just want to be super duper clear that we're not saying not to have male friends and let them open up to you and share with you and look to you for emotional support. we all have very close guy friends. I have best friends that are guys. We're talking more about when it feels unbalanced and it feels like they're emotionally dumping all their shit on you and you can't really do the same to them or you feel like the closeness is being manipulated in their favor.

Like just the imbalance, which can often happen when a guy maybe knows that you have stronger feelings for him, romantic feelings and he doesn't feel the same way, but he's using you in some way. That's all we're talking about those imbalance relationships, not female male friendships in general because we have all have those and they're very healthy and wonderful and we couldn't live without them. So just want to say that. And now I want to go back to your relationship and address you living with your brand new boyfriend. Yeah. We've never not lived together.

This is crazy. It's a crazy story. I don't know anything else like it. I just want to, wait, can I just say one more thing about what you were saying about the friendship thing and then we'll get into that? I just like, I think that a lot of people put these timestamps on and they're like, you know, it's happening now or, you know, it'll never happen. And the truth is that like it took you guys years. And like I think some people are like, if I can't have them right now,

then I'll never be able to have them. And like some people just have a longer story. Yeah. Some people's story is not like we met and we became together forever. Like it's not, don't give up hope if it's not immediate. That's true. Do you know Bachelor stuff? Oh, yeah.

Jared and Ashley. Oh, yeah. That is still the exception to all the roles. Oh, yeah. Like, do you know this? Jared Haybon or Ashley. I, Oia Kennedy. I can't say.

The story is crazy to me. Like she was so obsessed with him crying. I love you so much. But they only ever showed that part too. Yeah. And then they became friends. They were like, we're best friends. And then what she moved on, he was like, no, you're not.

And she found somebody else on like the winter games or something, whatever. And he was pissed. And he was like, no, no, no, no, no, no. Will you marry me? Yeah. Again, it's a brief story. But their story is also against everything I would ever preach. And I think there's exceptions to every role.

Absolutely. It was the classic case of her being obsessed with him for, what, five years? and they became friends. And then she was like, oh, I don't like Jared like that anymore. I have a new boyfriend now. And he was like, no, you can't move on. Yeah. Like he realized he did want that part of her.

Yeah. Like, you know, like he, the part that she had already been practicing, like giving to him. And then it was like, oh, this is threatened. It's going to be taken away. Sometimes it is certain things like that. Yeah, there is the jealousy thing, like you said. Once people see you with somebody else and they're like, wait a second, maybe this is a thing. And sometimes it really doesn't have a trigger thing.

It just does happen just eventually. Yeah. the wind blows the right way and all of a sudden you're like, wait, is the timing? Did we get your lips done or something? And they're like, oh, she's hot. Yeah, exactly. Like your tits, like your, your nipples get brought.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly. You start doing squats and they're like, oh, I feel like a good way. You know, something like that. It's like, this is exactly what I want in a woman. I need just a fake boyfriend. So all my guy friends will come forward and tell me they love me. Come forward. Yeah, you can hire people for that.

Guys, I have a boyfriend now. Any moment to confess their love. Yeah, yeah. Just post that. I'm almost mistaken. If you've been holding back on your feelings, please speak now is the time. 2020 is the year of confessing the love.

Thank you smooth. I've seen like memes and tweets like that. It's like, if anyone is a secret crush on me, now's the time to speak up. Shoot your shot. I love that. Oh, we were talking about you living together. Oh, yeah.

Yeah. So when we moved to New York, it was like a three bedroom and we just essentially, me and Robbie just moved into my room. And then we just had, like every comic in L.A. that was visiting just had this like room to themselves in Hell's Kitchen. I mean, the apartment was 475 square foot. So it was not like we had a, how is that even? It was. It was. It was like, we say, like, that's the size of my living room. Yeah.

How? Like Robbie would literally do pushups and his hands would be in the living room, his feet would be in the kitchen and his torso would be lined up with the bed. And there was like a washer and dry. It was like a really nice apartment. It was just a fucking thing. It's just the hallway and there's rooms. Yeah, it was like just a box with little like that literally only fit like a full bed and a dresser. It was like, it's like so small. Like my mom would send me Christmas presents and I was like, what are you doing? Yeah.

I'll tear you. Every time I go home, my mom's like, we have so much stuff in the basement for you to take. I'm like, you live in a five bedroom house. Yeah, no, thank you. My apartment is the size of your kitchen. Yeah. Every time my mom sent PJs, I was like, take them back.

I don't want to. I have no space. I also think my message always across the podcast is moved to New York and look, look what happened. You guys moved to New York and this happened for you. I mean, yeah. And like I don't want to, like, and I don't think it's because like LA was like, I don't think, I don't know what the fuck was happening, but it just, it really, we did have

to remove ourselves from the, from where we were, um, to kind of get to this point. Like, I don't think if we would have stayed in LA, I don't think this was our outcome. I think that I was having too much fun doing other stuff. I think that we were just different people. And I think that kind of having this shared experience, I don't know, you know, I really, I don't know all of it, but I do know that I think if we were in LA, we would never have ended up here. Yeah. Yeah, we wouldn't have. And but so, yeah, so we've just been living together, which has been forever for fucking six years, Jesus Christ. February is six years. And it's so crazy. I know. And it's, like, those things where it's like I, like, you know, you're supposed to like miss

somebody when they go out of town. But like, whenever he's out of town, I'm like, you're like, stay gone. You never not lived with him. Like, it's crazy. Like, there was no like adjusting to living with a person. You just always lived with them. We pooped in front of each other's day one. Like, it was, oh, that's forgot about the pooping. How you got poop in an apartment that's 40 and 50 square feet? On one of the first nights that we hooked up, we were like, I went to this bar,

we were like, we were the only ones there. It was like a Tuesday. They were like letting us like dance on the tables and like shit. We were like throwing darts where we were just acting. Pino Grasio shots. Pino Grisio shots. You know how I roll.

This is Pino Grosio shots for me where I found out. I, which is a party move, by the way. All class. Nobody knows how to charge you and it makes everyone laugh. Unless they're busy and then they will walk away from you. You asked a bartender for pinotry chiro chas? We were out a couple months ago. Yeah, we did a few years ago. The night that we had to rescue that girl.

Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah. We talked about that. Yeah. But after we rescued her and got her on her way to Jersey, Casey was like, I'm going to get everybody shots. And they came to the table and she was like, Pinocraccio shots.

I was like, this is amazing. It's also not scary. You know, nobody's scared of wine shots, but they'll fuck you up. That's funny. Okay, I love this. But yeah, so we went at the bar. We got hammered. We ended up, like, sleeping in the same bed.

This was like maybe the second time we'd had like a big makeout session, like within a week that we were there. And I got food poisoning. So I'm like in bed with him and I'm running and diarrheaing in the toilet every, and I'm like. Every five minutes. Yeah. And I'm still kind of like, you know, I'm still like, I mean.

That's my nightmare. Yeah, coming back in being like, hmm. Trying to like heard you. I mean like there, he had to have known. I'm getting up every five minutes to like. You can hear it. Apartment that small. I mean, like this one's not much bigger.

My poop is so. I shit's so loud. You can hear me in like a three-story house. I mean, it's not something. Explosive diarrhea is. It's falling. There's distance. You know, like you don't, like they should make the plop.

Make your butt. Make the toilets closer to the water. 2020. Make the candles smell like shit. Just help us out. Right. Bring a white noise machine into the bathroom. Make the flushes sound like diarrhea.

I don't know what you can do, but just help us help a girl out. But yeah, so I like was shitting and that was like, yeah, second time making out. and it's just like, well, here we are. Like, this is what's going to, yeah, we live together. This is what's going to happen. Like, you're going to see every part of morning time. But there was also a comfort because I'm on the morning. I know.

Morning breath, all of it. You guys just like skipped to a different stage. Yeah, next level. Because we were so close already, I think, which was, I tell you, it's like, it's such a double-edged story because then it was like, oh, well, we don't have to pretend to be anybody else. There's no games here. We're not texting and not go, like, there's nothing here.

You can't ghost. He lives in a choice. Right. Right. Like, what choice this guy has? Can you ghost me? I'll just knock on your door and be like, hello. He's like, I pay rent too.

I live here. Yeah. He's probably tries to ghost you. He locks his door. He's like, stay in your own bedroom. I can you just knock on the wall. Yeah, I can hear you in there. Well, it's interesting to you guys.

This is so funny. Come out. I made chicken. Right. You make him hang out because he smells dinner. Yeah. Like, I can hear you pooping. Yeah.

Exactly. Like, we all know we're in this apartment. There's nowhere to go. This is the apartment's the size of our arm span. Like, it's not. Yeah. So it's been crazy living together the whole time. But now, and it's also crazy, like, living together as a couple with a roommate

because it's like our whole entire relationship has to take place in one room, which is a fucking nightmare to have to argue and fuck all in the one room. Like, to not be able to, like, be, like, our roommate was just out of town for a little bit. We were able to, like, just fully have it out. Like, we screamed. at each other. Like, he matched my crazy, like, because I get crazy more than it is, but like, we had a matching crazy fight. And the next night, we, like, fucked in the kitchen. And I was like, this is how, I was like, this is the life I want. Right.

You guys are like that movie room? Wait, I think you might have made it about you guys. Are you still with the roommate? Yeah, we still have Amy right now. Still have her. Six years. She's still there. How would she held on this long? You know, like, we just tell Amy to book me more. She's a booker. She's a rat. I'll slide a note under her door and be like, this is my list of approved comics. Yeah, she can't go to me either. It's so interesting to you guys arrived at this like living together dating stage so quickly because like then like the marriage and the kids thing took a long time, right? Yeah. Because you do a lot of that you're set. And I think

a lot of people resonate to like, why don't you just do it already? So like how did you guys arrive to that? Well, you know, it's a it's a long and windy road that, you know, there were times when I looked at him and I was like, you've ruined this for me. There's not going to be a surprise. Like I want this and you're not giving it. Like there's been so many arguments. about it because it was like, I was also like, I'm 37, you know, like we've been dating since, since what, then I've been like 32 or something like that. So there was a lot of like, kind of like, what are we doing? What are we doing if we're not doing this? Like I want to know that I'm not like, we love each other, but I don't want to waste my time, you know, like, there's

eggs involved and like, I don't have, I, so you've had conversations, I'd start interview, but you'd had conversations about having children. Totally. Yeah. And you're just like, dude, what the fuck? This isn't fair. Yeah. It kind of became this thing where like, I would, just get so angry. And I think I didn't realize how much resentment I had towards him until we got into like a couple's therapy. And I was like, I think every argument we have is about the fact that we're not married, you know? And then it's just such an interesting thing because it didn't happen until like the last like two years is when I was like really kind of like, and I would go through my waves with it where he'd be like, it will happen, it will happen and just, you know, like give me my time.

And I'd have to like kind of make peace with the fact that I can't control everything in this relationship. Can I ask you a question? Because somebody, a friend of ours is in couple's therapy and the therapist asked her this. It pissed me off so bad, but I'm just curious. The therapist asked her, like, why do you need this so badly? Why do you need to get married? And I just think, like, well, that's what people do. So, like, when you were talking to him, like, I want to get married, like, why, why did you need to get married so badly? I just think I wanted the commitment. I wanted, I wanted, I want to move my, it's so hard when you're a comedian and you feel like the needle is not moving. It's like I was, I felt, and I think that this, I think a lot of our arguments also had to do with,

with me and where I was at in my life feeling like I had nothing in my, I felt like I was just fucking plateaued. Like I was like, comedy feels like it's the same. Our relationship feels like it's the same. We have a fucking roommate. Like everything about my life, I was just like, everything feels like a fucking flat line. And I was like, I need the needle to move a little bit. And I think I put the emphasis on that being a wedding and being marriage.

But it's so funny then because the minute he proposed, I got nervous. Because then you're like, oh, fuck, this is happening. And it's like, it's such an interesting dichotomy of the things that you think you want. And then when you get them and you're like, what the fuck, wait, okay, is this happening? Like it was such a weird thing. I don't know. We've been together for a really long time. Totally.

Also, I just think that question, if someone were to ask me that question, me not wanting kids, it's a little different. But like, if you want kids, you're allowed to be like, I want to be married. You know what? I don't care if it's traditional. This is what my parents had or whatever the reason is. Yeah. If you have talked about having a family, like, I think it's totally fair to be like,

I want to be married before we bring kids into this world. I was asking because it pissed me off and somebody asked her that. I'm not saying that you need to qualify it. I mean, I guess everybody should qualify everything they want. But I think that like if your dream is to be married to the person and that signifies the kind of commitment that you want to signify to the world,

to your parents, to your friends, then like you should have that. I'm not saying you have to qualify it. And yeah, kids, of course. I also like, I'm not going to lie like and be like, I just want to be married. I want a fucking wedding. Like I'm excited to, you know what I mean?

Like I think people always are like, do you want a wedding or do you want a marriage? And it's like, I want both. And I don't want to be faulted for the fact that, like, I want to have a big party with my friend. Like, I can't wait to see. There's only two times in life you get everybody that you love and one of them you're dead. Right. Like it's like, let us have this.

A lot of people came to your special taping. I had some people. You're a lot. You're awesome. I had some friends at the album taping. But, you know, like I feel like people are faulted if they want the wedding. You know, I feel like a lot of times it's like people give you such shit. They're like, oh, are you getting him a big wedding?

It's like, fuck yeah. If I want to. I'm like, I want to. I want a party. We say this all the time. We talked about this last week. I said, I don't want a wedding. If other people want it, great.

Live your dream. It's not my dream. Yeah. And I have a lot of friends too. And now that I'm like planning, I'm like, oh, I get why this is a pain of the ass. Your family sucks. Like everything's expensive. Like my mom asked me the other day, she's like, I have money.

Can I buy an invite? And I was like, what the fuck are you? She wanted me to invite one of her friends. And she's like, I'll pay for them. And I'm like, that's not how this is going to go down. Barb. No, thank you. What's the accomplice look like?

Totally. plus one and I'm like you can't. What did the fighting look like? When you guys were like having like, did he say like, I just don't see why you want this and you had to qualify it all the time? When we were fighting about getting married, about wanting to get married.

Yeah. He just, I think he needed his time, but he couldn't tell me what it was. Because again, guys, it's just, they just communicate different. I think their brain really are like just on two different brain wavelengths, you know? And so he was just like, I want this stuff with you.

And I'm like, I need you to communicate with that to me because I felt like I was, that's the biggest thing. I just, I felt like I was in the dark about how he felt about everything because he has a really tough time talking. He's like, I think about this stuff. I'm like, just share with me, man. He's like, I think about living here with you. I think about having kids.

I think about all this stuff. And I'm like, but you never talk to me about it. Like, I just want, like, I want to be in on it. Like, if we're planning this life together, like, fucking include me in the blueprint. Like, let's talk about this. And that was, and that's where like our things came. Because I would just bottle and bottle and bottle and feel like he wasn't talking and he was just like thinking and not saying stuff. So then it came out in all these

really like kind of weird ways and he'd be resentful and I'd be angry and it all kind of stemmed from this thing. And it just, you know, it just, it's hard and especially yeah, because we've lived together for so long and there's part of, like there's sometimes when I just go out in the living room and he's there and I'm like, get out of my house. And there's sometimes when I just can't wait to see him. So it's just such a fucking weird mix of emotions to like be in a relationship. Do you think any of it was like success, career-related? Like men tend to think about that more. Like I need to get to this point financially or I need to get this point in my career.

Do you think some of that was that? Or he was like, I can't propose to you because I don't have my shit together. 100%. And we had actually talked about that. Like he was like, I just thought I'd be here. Like we both were. In a field like that, like you just have no idea what your life is going to look like. Yeah, as opposed to two comics.

Like we both were unhappy with certain parts of our career. But at the same time that he, at one point, he had the writing job that he wanted. He was writing with John Stewart. He got on Conan. And so I would say, I'd be like, well, you had all these markers and you still didn't propose. And he's like, well, I wasn't ready then. And I'm like, okay, then what was the thing?

But then when it came down to like, then after that, then when he was getting ready, but he still kind of wanted the career to be in a certain spot. But it's like life has to move forward. Sometimes it's never going to look like what you, I mean, they say it all the time. It's never going to be fucking perfect. Right. There's not going to be a right time to have a kid. you're always going to be, you're never going to know what it's like to have, like, until it pops out.

Like, you're never going to be prepared. You can't read enough books that tell you, yeah, this is exactly how it's going to go. So it absolutely was something. And he values very much his career. And so I get it and I try to be supportive, but it's just really hard when you have two different communication styles also. Yeah. You know, like, I want to be supportive of him and his comedy.

But I also, like, I need to be emotionally supported. And then you get in this, like, cycle of how do we support each other when, we respond so differently. And then what did, what was I watching? Was this on Dirty John probably? Because that's like what I, we're, oh, it was just, she was just talking about her ex, I think. And she was like, we used to, it used to feel like it was us against each other.

Or like, it was me against him. Yeah. And I was like, whoa, that's so major. I know. Like I thought about that. I was like, oh, yeah. Is it crazy? Like when you're fighting, you're like, it's me against you

and it's supposed to be us against whatever the issue at hand is. Yeah. When did the therapy come to play? We only went twice because it turns out a couple of therapies is really expensive and I went once. It's wild. It's like a $300 hour. Yeah, and they need it up front and they don't take in shirt.

Like all this stuff. And so we need to get back because I'm an individual therapy and he's going to go back to individual therapy. But we, it just did get to this point where I was so resentful that we weren't getting married and he just wasn't talking to me because I was just so mad all the time. So it was just like it was nothing was getting. getting done. You have to bring a third party. You had to bring a third party. And again, yeah,

and then we had no space from each other. We do the same job. We're home. We had a whole year where he had got, the writing thing didn't go through. So he got laid off. I got laid off. So we had a whole year where we were just, not only like, we were just, every morning, it was a ground hug day. I'd wake up and he'd be like on the couch. Like I made coffee and I'd be like, get out. Like I just, it was like so much. What's Amy doing? Sleeping. She's sleep. She's like, I can't believe I live here. She wakes up at 4 p.m. She's great. Yeah. But it was just decide to not, I mean, honestly, like, did you decide that, like, the good outweighed the bad? Like, how did you decide? Like, I don't want to call it.

Because it very much, fights are so heightened. And it's like the same. And I'm talking to some of my girlfriends and they're like, Casey, just so you know, like, every long term, like, you're going to have the same fight every fuck. Like, that's just how it works out. Like, because I'm like, it's just the same thing. She goes, yeah, she goes, I've been married to my husband for 10 years. She goes, every six months, we argue about the same damn thing. She goes, and even just, and they have two kids. and she's like, she's like, maybe I just need to call you every time this happens because literally, even like last week, we're like, should we, should we, are we going to make it? Yeah. And she's like, and then we're fine the next day.

Like people just, I think you just need to just kind of box it out. But at the end of the day, somebody was telling me like, in a relationship, like, do you have fun? And like, we have fun. The most fun. Oh my God, we dance. We do weird shit. We make up songs. We like, like, that's your person.

It's like every weird part about me. Like, I realize that my bad stuff is like bad and I'm trying. I just kind of started realizing that I might not be as good of a partner as I think I am. And that's really hard for me to admit. I had therapy today. And I just like, I was like, you know what? I see, I never saw his side before because I was, as much as it sounds like, I felt like, I think I was so mad about being like, let's just fucking do this.

Like I'm the victim almost. I felt like the victim. And because he's so bad at communication that there was part of me that was like, I'm doing everything. And he was like, well, what are you doing? And I'm like, I don't know, but it's all of it. But I had no fucking answer for him, you know? And then I started thinking about all my little crazies that he doesn't fault me for.

And I was like, I need to quell that. I need to do some heavy, heavy lifting on myself this year to be a better partner because I don't want to call it. I want to be with this person. I have fun with this person. This person takes care of me. And I just, yeah, like we love each other. And it's not the kind of love that you're like,

oh, this card. And like we even like we're having a hard time finding a song to dance to. And I think it's because it's like it's a very different kind of love, I feel like. It's not like this like stars in our eyes. It's just like this kind of deep like I just have fun with you and want to be with you. You guys are like legitimately best friends. Like BFF, man. It's just not disposable.

My brother said something like very profound to me and I was just like, he's so smart. It's annoying. I was talking about something. But he said like if any of us were like truly able to self reflect, we'd all be perfect people. So like it's fine that you don't realize that like, you know, like we would all be amazing partners and friends. It's nice that at least you like put yourself in check and you were like maybe there's stuff wrong with me that I don't even know. It's literally within the last like couple days that I've been like, oh, I see. I see like just how my anxieties, how the things the way that I process things could possibly not work for parts of his personality.

And I was like, got it. All right. Let me, let me. And it's stupid shit. Like I never can find my keys. never not once. Never once have I left the house with a key in my pocket. Never not. And it stresses him out when I'm like, Robbie, Robbie, my keys. And he's like, we need a nail for you. And I'm like, you guys, you got to the whole thing next to the door. It's what I do.

Okay. I have to ask you though. Okay. So people are probably like, okay, so how did you get to propose? Did you ever give him an ultimatum? Did you ever try that? We, no, it was like, it was kind of like, even if I said it, we both knew it was bullshit. I wasn't going anywhere. I wasn't going anywhere. Where are you going to go? Where am I? Yeah, he's like, you're on the lease. Yeah, he's like, you know that I pay like house insurance for this. Like, what are you going to do?

But I think a lot of women relate to that. They're like, I've dug myself deep into this situation. I'm like financially responsible to this person. I live together. Now, what leverage do I have? Yeah. There was one fight that got bad that I was like, I think I went on street easy for like 15 minutes and was like, one bedroom's a story. And then I was like, what am I doing?

Yeah. But you guys also were, I don't know, were you. trying for kids or just not not trying before you got engaged. Right. So, so, yeah. So we had, like I said, it was, it's just, it's been a really up and down like two years just from like, really like we were we decided we were kind of like, okay, I'm getting older. Like we should at least go through these tests, especially since it was like, I had never really had a pregnancy scare. And I don't think he had either. So I was like, okay, let's let's start this. because it's like we kind of just started

like being like, oh, okay, let's just shoot in. And I remember the first time, like I went to, I was like Halloween. I was like dressed as Karellad'sville. Like I was hammered. I just remember like laying my head down being like, I'm a mom, you know? And it's just like, not that easy, yeah. Like I was like, I can't wait to wake up tomorrow.

I'm a mom. And someone's like, that's the tequila. Yeah. And then so it was like a couple months of just kind of loosely shooting in the goal. Yeah. And nothing was happening. And then it was like a kind of. started to track it and like nothing was happening. And then I kind of started to go get blood

tests and things like that. And I was misdiagnosed with Picos. And meanwhile, also, we were having a really up and down two years. So like I think this was like something we were like, we wanted to do, but we went back and forth with it. And I think it was something that he wasn't fully on board with but he was like, I want to give you what you want. And I'm like, but that's not how I want it. I want it to be. How kids work, right? Yeah. You got to be here with me. But then, but then like, then he really got on board and was like, I want to have kids with you. I want. I want to have kids with you. I want to have a life with you. And I was like, okay, I'm, I'm in on this. Like, let's, we're going to make this work. We love each other. We want this thing. But then we, so I got mistaken

with Picos, which is polycystic ovarian syndrome, which means that I, like, not ovulating. There's like a couple different versions. Oh, P-C-OS. Yeah. Is that what it is? Yeah. Okay. There's like a hormonal version. There's like a one where you actually do have like little, actually they say, sometimes it's like one big cyst, something like that. I was doing some research because I was like, maybe I'm not ovulating because I'm like, we're like fucking in the windows and I'm like looking for mucus and all this stuff. And I'm like, maybe this isn't. Because it is, like, you have to get very familiar with your twat.

Like when you start trying to like, you know, like look at your underwear and be like, this looks like eggs. That means it's time to have babies. I'm looking for mucus. Oh, like discharge. Babe, what are you doing? Just looking for mucus. Babe, I got mucus.

So what time are you coming home? Because I got the mucus. Like literally all the books are like, when it looks like egg, egg yolk, that's the time. but I'm like, nothing makes me less horny than egg yolk. Oh my God. Yeah. So when I had eggs in my panties, I had changed your pant to text and be like, come home. You sent him a picture of it.

You're like, discharge, baby. I'm dropping eggs over here. He's like, oh, this is so weird. I just got called to do a spot. I won't be home for a while. He's like, gross. I'm actually moving back to Florida. Yes, he's like, I'm in L.A.

That's disgusting. Yeah, so gross. But, yeah, so I got Mr. Digno, so I thought. So I like, I like, went on around. hormones and all this stuff. And then it turns out, like, I don't have it. Like I went to, I hated my, I went to this guy in colleges who I just had a bad feeling of, like, I just was like, I don't think she misdiagnosed me. Everything about it was wrong. I found a new doctor, which you really have to do your research. And I found this like fertility doctor that I absolutely

fucking love. And he was like, you do not have picos. But then we sent him Robbie's numbers and it's, we've got a sperm issue. Oh, okay. So it's a weird thing. like I did around hormones. And I also like, it was very mentally, it was emotionally hard because then I thought everything I was doing to my body. I was like, I can't have a glass of wine. I'm affecting myself. Oh, if I eat cheese, the hormones are affecting me.

Oh, I'm not supposed to be eating bread with this. Does it? Like, every time I made a decision that was going against this like research I did, I like got down on myself. So for like, then that six months when I was like living in that reality, I just felt bad. Yeah. I was just like, oh my God, I shouldn't be doing. Oh, my, my babies, you know, all this stuff.

Yeah. It's terrifying. Women just like, be noticed by this. It's terrifying. You six months? You spent six months completely. Yeah.

And I did around to hormones that like made me tired, gave me a headache and then like made me. Because it was like trying to give me an ovulation because Picos means you're not ovulating. And then after two months I had like the period from hell because then the period just comes like heavy for like a long time after. And then to come to realize that it's Robbie and then it's just like, okay. I'm like furious just thinking about this. It's so, but it's just it's the practice of.

which is so crazy. Like it's, you know, so then we got there. So now we're working with this new reality of like, okay, but essentially the doctor was like you're not going to be able to conceive naturally. Like you're going to have to do IVF, which then was like for both? Because do you have any issues on your end at all? I have to go get more tests. But so far, the tests that they've run on me seem, I seem to have, I don't want to brag,

but I seem to have the exhibit a 30-year-old. So I'm pretty excited back that. Well, they told me I had the exhibit 19-year-old recently. Stop it. That place closed, though. I really did. Yeah, that place is not functioning anymore. Okay, I felt the exact opposite that you felt.

I worked in there and I was like, this place is too nice. Why does this look so nice? Did you put pictures of this? Yes. We also had another friend that had a weird situation with them. Like, I'm not saying they were doing shady stuff. Yeah. Because we had a great situation with them too.

But we had two other friends actually. One about two different blood work scenarios. One were like, they didn't ask her if she was on birth control and they told her she was infertile. I'm brutal Yeah so Brutal I do you too

We've never talked about this I love this message You was like get a second opinion Go yes You have to You have to Like something like that Like yeah

Like straight up you're diagnosed With something Let me just check on that Totally and my sister's a nurse And I showed her my blood work Because my sister was also Trying it pregnant And she is pregnant now

But so we were going through this together I know She's so fucking selfish Pamela she did this too I'm six and a half years younger than me I'm fine I'm fine

And she got married three years ago and thought. No. Dagger. Oh, I know. All of that was going on. But especially scenarios where they're trying to get money from you for fertility, which is tens of thousands of dollars for people. And then that became the thing. Yeah, it was, it was crazy. So this doctor was like, you're not going to be able to conceive like with this sperm like this. It's not, it's not strong enough to swim. It's not really doing much. But we, so IVF will probably be the thing. And then that became a whole thing because then we're like, okay, do we spend? My dad gave us a little, my dad was like, I have a little bit of money saved for you. Obviously, you're my daughter. Like, but it's yours to do what you want with? So then we're like, do we use this for a wedding or do we use this for IVF?

And then that became a conversation. But then Robbie was like, listen, we're going to have both things. He's like, we're going to have a wedding. We're going to have a great wedding. He's like, and we're going to have a baby. So like, just we're going to fucking figure this out. So, but that was a blow because it was like, you know, you think that you're just, you think that you're going to get come in you and then you're going to get pregnant.

and then that's easy. Like you never think that you're going to have to throw a check with a comma in it at a doctor and sit somewhere and have them fucking, you know, you don't think you're going to have to poke yourself with needles. And so it was a really hard, it was really hard, especially because then it was like money-wise because you can get comics and then Robbie's, you know,

working a day job that he's not necessarily happy in, but he's going to have to if we have to now support this other thing. But we did find out he called me like right after he called me to be like, it's only IVF. Like I looked at the sperm, it's just not going to happen for you guys like that. Like he was just straight up with me. He's like, that's what's happening? I was like, what about IUI, which is the interuterine immunization?

I don't know. His sperm swims crooked? It's basically where they turkey-based you, where they put the sperm and then they stick that and they just shoot it past your cervix, whereas IVF is what they make the baby in the petri dish outside. And then they try to implant it. But if the sperm is crooked, it won't swim inside the egg. Yeah.

So that's why sometimes getting past the wall will like help it. So IUI is cheaper. But so he's like, I don't think that'll work for you either. That's what my sister ended up having to do. But he did call us back and say there's this kind of like off label. Like Clomid is what they give women. Back alley. Yeah.

There's, he's like, I know a guy that's got babies. It's at the back of a dollar slice shop. Yeah, yeah. Go in there and take care of you. Yeah. The baby have to be yours. No, but he basically said guys can use this. this female drug that like, that like I, like the round of hormones that I did that was trying

to like like fatten my eggs and give me a, um, uh, uh, an ovulation, guys can take it and it could possibly rev their testosterone. So now we've got Robbie on this like, like, lady. It seems gay. Lady. It can't just hear guys be like, fucking go. I'm not doing it. I'm not talking to your female drugs. Robbie's boobs have never been bigger. Oh, he looks great. His voice is super high. He's more touching his feelings, guys. Yeah, he's crying all the time.

He's bleeding. It's weird. It's funny. He sleeps. So, yeah, we're trying this off thing to hopefully be able. Yeah, yeah, he's been, I've been catching him watching 90-day fiancé without me. So, yeah, so he's on a lady hormone right now and we're trying, we're trying this. You're going to walk in tonight.

He's been watching, like, say us to the draft. He's going to have a face mask on being like, do you know what? putting these women through? Do you know? It's hashtag self-care for Robbie. He hasn't drinking a lot of wine lately. Yeah. Is it rosé?

Rosei. It's a rose in mixed with white wine. We just sort of wrap up. I mean, we have a game we're going to play with you. Yay! Okay, well, I love all these topics we discuss. So right now you guys are just in the thick of it, like trying out this thing with the lady drugs. Right now, the status right now is that we're planning the wedding, which is fun and stressful

and it's lovely and terrible all at the same time. but I'm excited. And we've got Robbie on lady hormones. And we're going to try IUI in a couple months. Okay. All right. Well, thanks for sharing your truth with us. Oh, sure.

Sure. Yeah. Okay. So we are going to do this segment with you. It's brand new. Okay. Since you host a crime podcast, you love death and crime. Yeah.

We didn't really talk about it that much. And we were like, how do we format this to make it funny? Yeah. So we were like, this could get dark. Oh, yeah. Yeah. That's what we, every week, we're kind of like, are we being respectful? Right.

So we don't promote, like, death and murder, you know. But we basically asked people to give us their funniest near-death experiences in a new segment that we are calling, but did you die? But did you die? Love it. And people, again, our listeners are so incredible. They knew exactly what we wanted. You know, nothing.

We were like, are we going to get like really scary stuff? Like I woke up in a frat house basement, you know, naked. Nothing like that. So we got really funny stuff. We kept it really light. I started like to tell Ashley. a story earlier and I was like, this isn't light. Okay. So, and I feel like if it's only two sentences, like in the question box, like, it can't be that

heavy. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. This is funny. Okay. All right. So we're just going to start reading them to you. Okay. And jump in if you've experienced something similar. Perfect. The first one, she says, I got struck by lightning on the top of the Duomo in Florence. My legs vibrated the Italian EMS prescribed wine. That is so Italian. They're like, just drink it off. Yeah. It also feels like, I got struck by lightning. They're like, just have some wine. They're like alcohol. It's also like, we get it.

You've been to Italy. Of course, someone's Florence, right? Stop bragging. Every girl is like, take me back. This brings me back. Accidentally drank four vodka Red Bull triples and had a heart rate of 172 till 5 p.m. the next day. Oh, wow.

That's like, I mean, you may as well just drank a case of four loco. That's so intense. I used to fuck with Ocah Red Bulls at the bar. I did, too. I think everybody did at a certain age. I think when they first, made their appearance. People were like, this is the only way to live.

You just got so drunk that then Red Bull just tasted like vodka Red Bull. I hate the taste of Red Bull, but I don't know if I actually hated it or if it just is the memories. That's so true. That's how I feel about Diet Coke and rum. It just tastes, Diaco, tastes like Captain Morgan to me now. Yeah, exactly. Okay, this one, I can relate.

She said, I choked on a chip, dipped in my favorite app, Buffalo Chicken Dip. I felt so betrayed. Can you imagine that you have to cancel Buffalo chicken dip forever because you almost died. I can't have my favorite app. No.

We're getting like food poisoning from sushi to be like, I got to go back to the raw fish. There's no way I'm staying away. I got it from tacos. It's pretzel salad for me as a kid. Was your family trashy like that? Have you ever had pretzels? Did you call it a pretzel salad?

Do you know what this is? It's my favorite shit ever. Strawberry jelly, whipped cream and pretzels. It's so good. Like OD'd on it as a kid and then got the flu and couldn't look at it for years. Pretzels? If people would bring it up,

I would start dry heaving. I've sent her, I started sending your photos. So the way that you make it is like you make a crust out of pretzels and then there's like crushed pretzels. Yeah. And then there's like a layer of strawberry jello and a layer of cool whip. It is so fire. Oh my God.

I mean like salty and sweet. I mean like I get that. I just have never, I've never done jello with other things. You're not from Pittsburgh. I don't know. I mean, I eat a lot of American cheese still to this day, but pretzel and jellos. Okay. All right.

It's fire. I didn't look at it for years. Like if there was like, we went to some like church gathering or there was like a big like buffet table, I'd have to have my mom go over and check if it was on the table. Oh my God. I would get like sick. That's actually my dad shoved prosciers. So I went to go visit my dad.

I was on the verge of getting food poisoning. I didn't know. I just felt really full and my dad kept shoving prosciutto in my face. Like he was like, is this one better or is this one? So he's just shoving like raw hanging meat. And I was like, mm, this tastes great. And then like I literally was like, dad, I really am full. He's like, just try.

This is the expensive prosciutto. Would you just fucking try it? And I was like, just like hanging it on my face. And then just like threw up everywhere. Oh. And like was in a different country. And like I really haven't been able to do prosciutto since. Well, it sounds like you come from a rich family.

Rain and I had pretzel and whipped cream and yellow. It happened to me with pigs in a blanket. That was our, that was our appetizer for dinner. I like crushed like 25 pigs in a blanket. No, this was like last year. My dad's retired and now just like traveling. So he was insane. Yeah.

So I was like in a different country. We had a futon mattress that didn't open all the way, so I have food poisoning, and I'm not on, like, I don't fit on a bed. It was like the worst night of my life. Yeah, you almost died. But did you die? But did you die? Okay, I got to read you just because this also happened to me. Yes.

I left a pizza in the oven all night and woke up naked on my couch surrounded with smoke. And then she wrote twice. This happened to me. It's even worse than this. It happened to me with mac and cheese. I set a pot on the stove with boiling water. I put a bunch of noodles in it. I was like, fuck it, I won't even wait for it to boil.

I turned it on and I must have passed out and I woke up to the fire department in my mother's house. Stop. Like, my mom was furious. I destroyed everything. Also, like the water had boiled down to there was no more water and then the pasta turned black and caught on fire. Oh, my God.

My mom was furious. I woke up with pizza on my chest once, but. Oh, my God. Same though. Yeah, but like, who hasn't? I just wake up and like in college and just there would just be like peanut butter everywhere. Like my friends were like, what were you dipping last night? I'm like my hands. Like I just, they were just hands. They're going to be peanut butter on the doorknobs.

Um, okay. This one I feel like I can feel it. I can taste it happening. Okay. She said, I got an I ud and took Tramadol. Then I drank a bottle of wine was convinced I died that night. That is so much. What is Tramadol. Just probably like an opioid. I don't know. No, it's like it's just a horse tranquilizer. No, I'm just kidding. I think it's just a pain reliever. I think it's not. I think I think, I mean, that's such a pain. I used are so painful. I just tranked myself. She saw God that night.

I feel like I can feel this one too. Having sex, it is penis unexpectedly slid into my butt. I screamed so loud. Girl, we've all been there. The scream. I can hear her scream. That's like a gutterol. Like, who ha-ha-ha-ha-ha?

It's also like, whose butthole is it slipping into? You know, there's got to be some jimmying. Every time somebody says, like, it accidentally went my butt. I'm like, it didn't. How loose is your butt? Yeah. You got to have a butt. The whole head did not get it.

in there. It was just some light pressure. But if someone was, if someone's really like going at you and they slip out and like hit your butt hole, like, not that it would go in, but you would be jolted. You would be. Oh, yeah. You'd be like, oh, that was different. Slightly.

This one, I need more details. I had to get the hymlich during the middle of a church service. Like during communion or like, what were you snacking on? Like, what did you, what did you choke on in church? What did you bring to church in Eminem? I feel like Eminem is are a good church snack. I would put money on it, made an M&M. It's not only little snacks.

That's how you get kids to sit through church services. You're not pulling out a brisket. Now it's iPads. I drank a starbs cold brew. I like how she abbreviates Starbucks. I drank a starves cold brew on an empty stomach and the nearest bathroom was an hour away. Every time I have to poop, it's an emergency.

Every single time. This one I had, this was my, like my similar experience. I went and walked down, maybe like 10 blocks to go get like a cold brew out, which is out for a walk one day, went and got a cold brew on an empty stomach. And I was walking by. I was maybe five blocks from my apartment. I was like, it's, I'm happening. I'm like doing the shit shuffle where you're just like trying to clench your asshole and like you're like shuffling your feet like so scary. And I finally like, I'm starting to sweat. And I'm like, this is it. I'm going to

shit my pants on the street. And I ran into my house through my purse on the floor. It just went. I made it to the bathroom. And I was wearing a romper that day. And so I was fully naked. And I was wearing my sunglasses. glasses still. And I'm like, if this is how I die, if someone walks in, they're like, this girl partied. Like, I'm fully naked with some like ray bands on, just on the toilet. Like, that's how they find me. Oh, my God. I hate, that's like the worst feeling. I actually, like, switched to tea for almost a year. I'm back to coffee, but I think I'm going back because, like, I can't, like, every time I have a cup of coffee and then I eat something, like immediately,

I can't leave my house because my body's like, you, wait, wait, wait, what? Just the smell does it to me. I brew coffee every morning. I make a coffee in my curing. Every morning the smell makes me just explode. I mean, it's a great diet. Starbucks? I know. I call it coffee. Chris DeStefano, we were DMing yesterday.

Sorry, Raina. And he said, how do I? I can't believe he cheated on your phone. He said, how do I not? Or he basically was like, how do I not have diarrhea on this flight? And I just was like, you would just visualize your beehole as a steel trap.

Like just visualization techniques. I don't know what else to tell you. How do you know a guy does? You know, I feel fine about this now. How do you a guy doesn't like you? He doesn't like me. I don't like him. I didn't like him first.

It's fine. Okay. He was trying to flirt with me and I was like, please stop this. Then he was like, rain as an easier mark, I'll go there. This one, I have so much anxiety. My shoelace got stuck in the escalator at the airport. Almost turned my foot to ground beef. So we didn't need that visual.

But I felt on an escalator when I was 20, I think, 2021. I was in Atlanta visiting from college and I fell down. The escalator started bleeding. I still have a scar on my shin. I have like a major escalator anxiety. I just moving steps. What the fuck? You know what I have more anxiety?

The revolving door is that people let their children run through. I have so much anxiety watching people's children. You put one finger in there the wrong way. You don't have a hand anymore. Yeah, you're done. I don't understand people that just like... Fingers and you are not no longer. I don't understand people who left their kids.

Weren't we somewhere recently? A kid was just like flying through the revolving door. Were we in Chicago? Yes. At the... The Willis Tower now, right? You're right at the tower. Okay.

This one is, I'm so glad I got this. I passed out. I'm so mad about this. I passed out on a beach. A coconut fell from a tree literally landed half a foot from my head. Jesus. That would kill you, wouldn't it? Oh, yeah.

I mean, they're concussed. They're heavy. They're so heavy. Also, it picks up, it picks up velocity as it comes down at you. Totally. If the palm tree was tall, you're done. The only way that you are saved is maybe that the sand has some give. So when it hit you, you'd like just sing back down in.

You wouldn't worse case. You're such a crime. Thank you so much. Aloha. I can't imagine. I would feel so betrayed if I died by coconut. I love coconut. Death by coconut.

I don't know which is worth. Death by buffalo chicken dip or death by coconut. I think about that sometimes like these freak accidents. So like a street sign just falls on your head. I think about that all the time. Have you ever had one of those? Like timing things where you like got five seconds and I would have been. Anything like that or happened either you?

I don't know. Just that time I almost shit my pants. I actually have shit my pants. But like something falling. No. Ashley, I'm so happy. This one, Rainer wrote this one. I'm good. Farted for so long. I thought I was having a heart attack. Oh, my God. How long?

It happens. I feel like as I've gotten older, my farts have just gone, like, they're just, there's, there's no end care anymore. Oh, my God. There's times. And now, and now that I'm like having a ring on my finger, I'm just doing them freely, you know, like, I'm like, it's a lot to ask for somebody to suck to, to, to make themselves sick and in pain just, just. Yes. The first you get that ring. Yeah. I mean, but I also do, like, I try to be nights. Like, I'll, I'll, like, hold my cheeks open so that it's more of like a ha, than in like a, oh, it doesn't, like, vibrate?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'll try to, I'll try to. What's the pleasure in it if there's no sound? No vibration. It's a dog fart if you don't have the cheeks. Sometimes. That's why dogs, sparts are like, or I don't can't do it. Because there's, we talked about this on a podcast that I went on, like, why dog

farts sound like that. And the vet, Dr. Lisa Lippman was like, because they don't have it. They don't have cheeks. Yeah. We were like, whoa. I never thought about that. That is crazy. Like the vibration is from your cheese.

Sometimes I wake up because I fart and then I'm like, I'm scared. Somebody's like in the room with him. Like I, because I slept with this guy like two nights ago and I fart this morning. And I was like, oh my God, is somebody here? The ones will wake you up. Those angry ones are like, and you're like, stop. All right, we only have a few more. Can I read this one because it's about you?

I feel like another one about you. I see this. I just want this one in the last page. You can do that. I see this happening to Raina. Absolutely. She was in Cancun. They had a phone party in the pool.

my short ass almost suffocated in the bubbles. Like I can see Raina like, I'm not going to make it. And like, who do you even tell? Because everybody's so far away from you. And everybody's fucked up in ecstasy. Yeah. Oh my God. Yeah.

Nobody would know. I love this one so much because like I, this is like the story basically that like started this whole thing that I was telling Ashley, this is from somebody else though. I told a guy once that I wanted to try being choked. Turns out I don't like being choked. There it is. It's got to be a light choke. I told Ashley, I was like sleeping with this guy and I was like, be more aggressive with me.

And then like we were fucking and he was on top of me and his like arm was like fully cutting off my oxygen. And I was like, I don't like this is not so long. It scared me. I was like, I'm going to faint. Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah. Well, this isn't funny because that's like promoting violence. No, it's got to be a light.

It's got to be a very light choke with like we're not doing two-handed strangulation. Like I just want a small like a one-handed kind of. of like, like a one-handed pulsing kind of. Isn't that what, I mean, I like a hand on my neck too, but if a guy went two hands, that's not for me. No. But some girls do, I think, right? No.

Listen, if you can think of it, it exists. Some people like it. Yeah, but like I'm just not in, like, I'm not a choking connoisseur, I guess. So I don't really know what everybody's doing, but like, are people really, are people doing two-handed triangulation. I don't like it when guys are on top of me. When somebody's on top of me, like, I don't like that their, like, arm or hand is, like, cutting off my breath supply. I think the first time a guy did it to me, like, a hand on my neck that I felt like was really hot. He was, like, behind me.

Yeah, that's morning sex. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. A stony. Yeah. Oh, I like that. Yeah, it was nice. Oh, I also love that lazy ass more. But, like, when they're a doggy style, yeah. You just back your ass up into them, slide it on it. You just, like, lift a leg. Yeah. Doggy style and they're, they're, so they're kind of holding. on by your neck. Yeah. That's what they're anchoring themselves to your body with your neck. All right. We're running.

This is a long episode. Well, we're glad you girls didn't die. Yeah. Thank you guys for all the submissions. We got tons. It's always you're hilarious. But if you want to hear about actual death stories, listen to Casey's podcast.

Please do. Not another true crime podcast, right? Yeah, every Monday, except for this Monday because we didn't do it. Okay. We're coming back. Maybe. We'll see. You know, you never know.

Yes, but not another true crime podcast. It's really fun. And where else can they find you? I'm at CaseFace B on Instagram, C-A-S-E-F-A-C-E-B, Casey Bealsam on Twitter, although that's not my preferred medium. Okay, so Instagram. And, yeah, and Son of a Barb is the album. If you want to listen, feel free.

Some people don't know, like, where to get albums. So iTunes, Spotify. It's on iTunes. It's also like on Pandora or Spotify, yeah, yeah, and Spotify. So it's very funny. We were there. Your Cameltoe humor is second to none. Thank you very much.

Did the Cameltoe jokes make the, album? The Camelta Joke is on the album. Okay, perfect. Perfect. And they can see you at comedy clubs around your second. Yeah. Oh yeah. I usually try to post the shows on my Instagram, so that's the best way to get a hold of me. Awesome. Cool. Well, thank you for all of this wide range of topics. I feel like we had a lot of stuff and you were very vulnerable. And I just love that you're here. Thanks for letting me admit some weaknesses. She's like you have to cut all of that, please. Robbie would not like it. My fiancé would not like it. Guys, girls got a podcast on Instagram. Girls Got to Eat Podcast on Instagram. Girls

com, stupid live shows.com, Ash Hess, reina. dot Greenberg, Girls underscore Gotta eat on Twitter and subscribe, rate review, and we'll see you next week. Bye, guys. Have a good week.

Bye.