Girls Gotta Eat - Mo Money Mo Problems?

Episode Date: July 9, 2018

It's like the more money we come across, the more problems we see....or is it? We are so excited to discuss relationships and money issues in this episode -- everything from breadwinner women to who should pay on a first date to how much money even matters. We also give a play-by-play of Ashley's recent sext scandal, and chat about Rayna's upcoming wedding season. And we wrap up with an extra ridiculous game of F*ck Marry Kill. Enjoy! Follow Girls Gotta Eat on Instagram @GirlsGottaEatPodcast. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Most men try to do the right thing. They pay for like drinks, whatever. But in all night long thing like this, especially if you're never going to see the person again. I'm like, now that guy's $300 in the hole and I'm not going out with him again. He should have just bought a prostitute for that kind of money. That's crazy. Yeah, but my...

At least you would have gotten laid. Hi. Welcome to another episode of Girls Got to Eat podcast. So excited. I'm really excited about this one. You're real excited. So excited. We'll tell you what the episode's about soon.

They already know what the episode's about. I always forget that. We're like, we're going to surprise you. They're like, we read the description. Like, we know what it's about. We have a special guest. They're like, yeah, we fucking know. We saw it on iTunes.

We can read. Well, I just tell you guys, I've been bugging Ashley since day one to do an episode about money. And she every week tells me no. I wanted to have a male guest for the money thing. And then yesterday we're at this event with Mouth Media. Oh, sorry, guys. We're here at Mouth Media, powered by Scy. I got to plug them.

We have an amazing media company. They're so wonderful. And they brought us together for this really cool podcast live show yesterday. Yeah, it was very cool. And we're there. Well, I'll just tell it. I want to tell it. In the middle of the episode, there's 100 people in the room listening to four people

give a live podcast. We're supposed to be paying attention. We're like children at all times. I'm texting Ashley about like on Hinge. I found this guy. I was like, he looks like Prince Harry. Anyways, Ashley has like half a sip of wine. She looks at me and just mouths in the middle.

And she leans in. And she's like, we can do the money episode. Why I did it. I'm so dramatic. But I did, I literally like one glass of rosé. And then we're trying to figure out, we're doing two episodes today. We're recording two. So we were like trying to kind of figure out what the other one should be.

And I was like, in my head, I'm like, fuck it, we'll do it. Like it was, I wanted to like see your real-time reaction while we're supposed to be being like totally silent. And she was like, oh my God, oh my God. I just came and slid off the chair. No, it is actually like when you lean in on a date and you're like, I'm so wet right now. Like, Rand was like, really? Oh my God. We have to leave.

I leave back in and I was like, you just caught me so hard. Anyway. So, money episode. Come in hot. Before we get into that, I mean, obviously your daily reminder to tell everybody you know about our podcast and rate us and review us. But I want to remind everybody that I'm right about everything every week, the night before we record at 11 p.m.

something always happens that we can talk about in the intro. It's pretty crazy. Like this happened and I was like, oh, my God. What happened last night? Okay. here's what's going to happen, Raina. Well, let me set it up. If you guys can't tell, Ashley's in charge.

It's because she's six feet tall and I'm scared of her. No, but you're a Jew. We decide. Remember we were like, what's more people think? Oh, yeah, does Jew Trump tall? We were trying to decide who was in charge. People will email and they'll say, hi, Raina. And I'm like, do they think you're the boss?

And she's like, because I'm a Jew. And I'm like, but I'm tall. So now we're like, does Jew Trump tall? Actually, you guys, we'll do a poll on our Instagram. Does Jew Trump tall? I hate the word Trump, but whatever. whatever. Okay. So last night, we went to dinner, of course, and it was a tar. And I get home and I'm walking my dog and I come back in. I saw that I had some text messages. And like, as we all know, like single girls, you're always like, oh my God, is that my whatever? Is that somebody in the mix? We always have somebody we wish our text would be. I'm like, oh, my God, is that seamless? Um, no, but like, you know, of course, there's always somebody you're like, oh my God, is that him? So I'm like, maybe that's this the latest guy. I'm like hoping that texted me. It wasn't.

It was another guy. And I'm going to show you this. And I told you ready, you need to read these, like, very slowly. I don't want you to jump ahead. So I got this text. And I'm going to pass my phone over to Raina right now. Random number. Didn't recognize the number.

Okay. Here we go. Okay. Aside from the fact that there is a beautiful, naked black man staring back at me. That's not a black. Yes. He's not black? This is a black guy.

He's beautiful. You think he's black? He just looked tan to me. Are we having, like, Like, is it the dress? Do you see like silver or purple? This is a black guy. Light skin.

I don't care if he's like, but I think he's covered in stars. This body is crazy. Okay, so start. We'll screenshot up you guys. The text starts with, come cuddle, period. Sons, PJs, please.

It's very warm. And then the picture. And the wildest body eye. Jesus Christ. Like, but describe the picture. I mean, it's like, Okay, this guy has like a 10-pack. He's naked and the, oh my God, the sheets are like pulled down,

just like just around his penis. You can see the outline. His body is crazy. You know I love a dick outline. Okay, I'm so excited for you to read this. Okay. This is more of a demand than a request. And then he goes on to say.

And this was probably all in like, I mean, I probably walked around the block for 20 minutes. So I'm thinking this guy sent these. sex and then was like, oh, again, you don't know this phone number at all. Totally, yeah. Fuck, I'm so, so sorry and embarrassed. Met someone out last night, agreed to exchange numbers, realizing this is likely the wrong number. Please disregard like anybody would disregard that photo. Right. So, I don't care if it's right number or not. I would go over there. So guys, just to recap, got like an almost fully naked pick of like the hottest body, probably a stock image, let's be real. It looks like a professional. This looks like a GQ photo.

It does. But you know, never know. It could be like a model. It doesn't matter to me. Totally wrong number. So first thing I do is obviously like screenshot that and send it to every public so many people that I knew would get a laugh out of it. But I saved it. I didn't want to show Raina. Okay. Ashley writes back what any normal me and Ashley text should be. I'm proud of you. Yikes, wrong number. What's your address though? Are you local?

I am dripping with pride for you. I know. Yeah, I gathered. I'll apologies again. where is 302 girl at least? Okay, so you're our zip coat. He's like, where's 302 and like, did I text this to a female? Like, please God. Sure. 302 is Delaware, but I'm in Los Angeles right now visiting my grandkids.

Are you in the area by any? Holy shit. Why are you really fucking with this guy? I wanted him to think it was a grandmother. Okay. Grandkids, question mark. I'm in San Francisco, bit of a drive. Michael, pleasure to me.

need a to meet you stranger. So this guy's like, hi, I'm Michael. After I told this guy that I'm visiting my grandchildren. It's so crazy. Keep on. I'm Esther.

Pleasure to meet you as well. And of course, Ashley, she's such a pervert sends all the water droplets. Esther. And then this God, show me you. I'm still in bed and warm. Let's trade pets. Guys, let's just stop what we're doing.

this guy, what guy hears, I'm a grandmother and then is like send nudes? All of them. All of them, because they're all disgusting. Every one of them. Are they so disgusting? Yes, every man was like, all, I'm in it. Like, maybe it'll be like a hot grandma. But what do you think you're going to get?

Like the small chance that it's some grand, not mom, grandma. Some grandmas are 60 and they are rocking, slamming. All right, well, keep going, girl. Kevin Zeta Jones is a grandma. That's true. I'll take some fucking naked pics of Catherine Data. Okay. Uh, show me you.

Show me you. Let's trade picks, Granny. Ashley, this is so gross. Ashley sends a photo of a really pale, very saggy ass covered in cellulite. In a thong. In a thong. Those underwards are cute. I just, they're like hanky-pankies.

I just Googled like old lady ass and found the best photo. Oh, this is so mean. Good night, Esther. Sorry again. Oh, this is where he shuts it down. This is when he finds a problem with what's going on. Good night, my sweet prince. Talk to you tomorrow.

No, definitely not. Love a boy that plays hard to get. Who is this? Esther, silly. I hit the hay. I have a big day tomorrow with the kiddos. Talk to you later. You really took this to fruition.

I'm proud of you. I just can't. Like, I was like, do I say I'm like a boy or like, I was like, I don't want to say I'm like a young girl. That's super weird. Like I was like, I'm going to go with, I'm a grandmother. Like, I cannot believe this guy was like, send pics. Because guys don't care. That's how little they care. They're like, I'm already in this. I've already sent this to like a person. As long as the check of an appropriate age, I'm doubling down, I'm doing this. It's 11 p.m. She might have a podcast tomorrow to talk about this on. I sent it to my good, I said it to my good guy friend Bobby. And he was like, he's firing at Esther? I was like dead. So you're also a Jewish old woman. This is so funny. I hope I made you proud.

A lot of people would have just let that go. Like, ha ha, sorry, no worries. I was like, yeah, I'm going to fuck with this guy. I would have sexted with him, but you went the other route. You went the comedian route. I'm going to put that image in, like, Google backwards, like how they do on Catfish and see if it's, like, a stock image or a model. Like, it doesn't look real.

I want to Google this dude and we should reverse look up his phone number and find out what he looks like. Because I want to know, we should reverse image that photo. That's what I'm saying. And reverse image the phone number. Because I want to know who this guy is. Don't be sending me like I-Dris Elba photos, like when you're just like some old-ass man. That's why you liked Esther. This is like some old man.

What if this is going to be a love connection? Right, I'm not an old lady. Send him another photo later of your actual ass. She'd be like, sorry, kidding. Okay. So, good for me. Good for you. Never let a wrong number go to waste.

Ever. Ever. Like, you just like, why not? Like, that was the hardest I've laughed in a while. and I did it all on my own. You never knew who was texting you? I'm into this. This is amazing.

I hope I can get the wrong number of text later. Okay. What is going on with you? I'm geared up to go to a wedding this weekend. I'm super excited. It's one of my oldest friends. There's about 300, 400 people going to this wedding. I am probably the only person going without a date.

Out of 400 people. Yeah. But you know what? I feel fine about it. You're probably the most famous person there? I'm definitely the most famous person there. You can't have like, you can't be like as awesome and famous as us and have like the love of your life on your arm.

It's just not fair. God doesn't give with both hands. Yes, you can't have it all. I feel fine about it. I feel like, you know, I used to feel like nothing makes you feel literally more alone in the world than being alone at a wedding. Like, even if you love yourself and you're so proud of yourself,

but like, I don't know, I'm pretty happy with my life. I look good these days. Yeah, you look great. One of the hottest guys I've ever slept with and the worst people, like the worst person as a human being I've ever slept with, is going to this wedding. And he's single. Oh.

And I have like a really nice hotel room. Oh, that's perfect. Yes. He lives in Paris. So like I don't have to. This guy. This guy. He was in Paris.

Yeah, okay. I know the story. We dated for like a bunch of months on and off really some of the best sex I've ever had. I'm fine with this. And he doesn't live here. So like there's no. Yeah. There's no like worry that I'm going to like start dating this dude.

And like what? Like you're not going to get attached. You know he's a terrible person. Terrible person. Amazing at sex. Is that usually how it is? For me. Yes. I never met somebody that was just like such a wonderful, honest, nice person and they just

laid it down so good. Really? Hold on. We should, we should talk about that. Actually, can nice guys be good and bad? That's a good topic. One guy. I had one guy. Actually, you know, I will take it back. The dirtiest sex I've ever had is one of the nicest guys I've ever dated. Uh-uh. Yes, just like filthy, disgusting stuff. What? Yes, I totally forgot about this. He's not a nice guy. He's getting married. He's got a dark side. He's getting married to somebody. He's got some fucked up issues probably but like mommy issues or things like that I can deal with anyways he was yeah nice guys can be good in bed once in a while okay good to know um good to know like I don't fucking know like I haven't had sex with like a lot of people I yeah I mean I've got to been to so many weddings

alone I don't know I don't feel that bad about it because I'm like it's a party it's open bar like I'm here to party I look good guys I'm just here to party Ashley wears a t-shirt to the wedding that says that sorry for party it's Do you also wear like a mullet also when you go? So you bring your own Budweiser. As you wears cut out jeet shorts and like American flag sunglasses, bring some Budwisers. Make American great again. I'm just here to party.

Sorry for party. Sorry for party. It did sound so stupid. Just here to party at your wedding. Anyways, look, I think that like people look at their life and I sort of think of these like these boxes and they're like, I want a career. I want a husband. I want like a stable relationship. I want children.

I want a house, whatever. I've checked a lot of boxes. I'm really proud of. I haven't checked the husband box. And I feel perfectly fine about that. Yeah. All right. So we're going to get into our topic today.

I am so excited. I know. You're really like, we need some music for this one. Money, money, money, money. Money. Yes. Crushing it already. Anyways, we've gotten some listener emails about this too.

And I think that a lot of people have a relationship to money in their relationships. It's probably the, it's one of the number one, like, reasons for conflict in a relationship, top three. I can't imagine anything else that's higher. There's no relationship that's just like money is not a thing in some way, whether it's, you know, rich guy, rich girl. I mean, it's just like it's, it can't be ignored.

Yeah. So what we want to talk about today is money in a relationship, not money in a marriage, because first of all, we're not married, so we can't really speak to that. And like combining finances and things like that. But in a relationship, if she makes more money, if he makes more money, if you make the same amount of money, I think it's just like such a meaty, interesting topic. Oh, I mean, yeah, it totally is. And I think that that's, it's something that like ask any female who's had significant amount of time on this earth being in relationships. And they've got some sort of story.

Right. And I've been, of the three relationships, the serious relationships I've been in in my 20s and 30s, I've had all three scenarios. He made more than me. We made the same. And I made way more than him. And all three of those things present different challenges. Yeah, exactly. So where do you want to start?

Oh, man. Do you want to, do we have the email or do you just want to remember what it was about? Yeah, actually. I'm going to pull her up. And her email aligns with some of the stuff we've dealt with. Yeah, this email was like really, Ashley and I have definitely been like the breadwinners in a relationship. So this email was like speaking to me. Yeah.

So the specific email, she goes on to say a bunch of stuff. But the bulk of it, my boyfriend and I have different financial statuses. case he is a waiter and I work in a marketing company. I'm wondering in what ways this will affect our relationship and it is realistic to be with someone who doesn't have a quote unquote career as opposed to someone who went to college and is now working in the business industry. The harder thing is that he doesn't want to go to school. He says it's not for him. I completely understand that. But realistically, if I were to stay with him, can this really work? She's their age. It sounds to me like they're younger. It sounds to me like they're younger. She said that she just started this job.

and the school was still an option for him. It just sounds like they're younger in their 20s. I think age is a really important factor in these things. The things that you want and expect your partner at 23 are not what you want and expect at 33. I mean, vastly different. Like, I'm not even, I don't think I was really like even looking at people as like potential husbands, life partners, engaging their financial status and career on that until I even hit like 2930.

Like all my 20s, because I knew that. I knew I was just like not in any. rushed to get married. And so, I mean, my 20s, I'm going to date whoever. I think it's interesting people that did start thinking about that at that age. And that happens. And like people who had probably, I would say probably mothers and fathers that told them, you know, find somebody that can be a good provider for you. I was so focused on me and can I be a good provider for me at that age. And that's, you know, I'm not going to get too far into this, but especially for me going to school in the South, I mean, you call your MRS degree. Like

women are in college to find a husband, which is so foreign to me, but I was surrounded by that so much. So, I mean, that was never my goal. The thought of, like, a guy relying on a guy is, it gives me anxiety to even think about. So I don't know, like, I know you are a totally different person than you were back when you were in your 20s and you were engaged and all of that. But, like, it's just, I'm not built like that. Like, it was always like, I'm going to be, I'm going to be rich and famous. Like, I better be. Well, I was raised. I I don't think I've ever talked about this on the show. I was raised by a single parent, essentially.

My father lived down the street from us, but my mom and my dad got divorced when I was four years old. And, you know, I think my mom thought she married a person that would always be successful and always support her. And my dad started making some very crazy decisions about money and, you know, doing things like forging her name on documents and things like that. And my father's a wonderful person. I think that he thought, you know, I'll get out of this hole eventually.

and he just didn't. And I think it was so terrifying for her. And eventually my parents did split up, I'd say probably over money issues. And both of them are, I've nothing. They're wonderful people. I had a great life. But my mom didn't expect that to be her life. She didn't think that she would be a single parent with a four-year-old and an infant.

Right. And so she always taught me to have an education and be able to support yourself. And I think a lot of women raise their daughters today to be like that. Right. That's a pretty modern concept. It's, I see, I see both. I still know so many people like in, especially like in the South. It's like so long in Atlanta that like it's still that old school.

Like you stay home, raise a family and like the guy makes all the money, which is so beyond. Can you imagine like, honey, can I have some money? It sounds amazing. I would love that. Shut up. I can't even imagine. Like I can't imagine not making my own money. That's such a why.

I can't even picture it. Like you're like, what do you say? Can I have some money? Like you don't have any money. money? No, I do want to jump in. It's like wielding power. I do want to defend that sort of lifestyle. I do have a bunch of girlfriends. I grew up in Pittsburgh, which is not the South, but it's the Midwest. I have a bunch of girlfriends that don't work that have kids. And I don't think that they look at it as their

hand is out. You know, they clean the house and they cook and they make sure everything, all the things are taking care of. They take care of their kids. And I think that their husbands think that they are contributing just as much. Well, okay. You're right. So maybe that's a good place to start. Okay. When the man makes more money. Well, just that concept of like, or someone makes more money and the other person is kind of handling all these other things. And I think that that's how, just to start at the very beginning, I mean, that's how traditionally our gender roles are set up that like the man brings home to bacon and then the woman like cooks, cleans, raises the kids. And those things are of value. Like let's not, let's be real here. I mean, those, that's that's a trade off. Like everything's not about money. Everything's not like dollars. I mean, it's really, I want to definitely talk about your relationship. This is something we talked about last night, like, that really spoke to me about like once one person is making more money and then

also doing all the other stuff. You know, like, you see so many relationships where someone's making more money, but the other person is contributing like a lot of other ways and it feels equal because I'll say money is not everything. And there's like a lot of other things that happen in a relationship that are like of value. I mean, time is money, you know? Right. Do you want to talk about something you went through? me to talk about what's something I went through? Yeah, we were talking about this last night, too. I've never dated, like, a guy with tons of money. So I can't really speak to that. I don't really need that. I make money and I don't like somebody to just pay for me all the time. I've talked about

my stance even like on dates where I feel like, why did you just have to spend hundreds of dollars on me? You don't even know me. I don't know. I think I have a different stance than some other females on that. I was in a relationship where I made more. And I don't know, there's a lot of other issues in that relationship that came up. So then that kind of was like packaged into the whole thing. But it was a guy that didn't really mind that. Like I don't think that that was emasculating to him. He also grew up raised by a single mom. So those gender roles of like this man as the provider weren't like ingrained in him and that was something we talked with Jared how like guys have this whole like they've seen their dad provide for their mom and they need to get to that point before they

can even commit to a to a woman and it's a little different when you have a guy that didn't have that growing up so like they aren't as intimidated by a strong woman they probably prefer it so money wasn't such an issue in terms of like it being weird that I made more the thing that I guess was an issue for me was that I started to just make more and more in that relationship like my career just kind of took off. And so then it was like, I want to travel. I want to do these things. And like, I want you to be like a long for the ride. And like he just wasn't totally there financially, which is fine, you know, and this is something that was a little bit younger than me. It's fine. I mean, I've been, when I was trying to get my career together, I was so broke. And,

you know, we've all gone different stages in our life. I mean, this isn't a 35 year old man we're talking about. It was someone that was, but that was younger. So that was the issue for me was this, like our lifestyles don't match right now. And so do I pay for stuff? Am I putting your flights on my miles. Like, I don't want to get into that cycle. And that was something I did sometimes. And you don't want to get into that. You don't want to be like, now I'm just, I'm Delta over here, putting all your flights on my, like, tab. Right. But I think it's sort of normal in the beginning to be like, well, I can pay for this and we can do it together. Or I can not pay for it. I just don't get to experience this at all. I know. It's really tricky. And that's, I think that's typically

more of thing that guys deal with. I mean, you know, we both have guy friends and make plenty of money or, you know, our family members and things like that where the guys are like, I want to go to Europe and you just have some low-paying jobs. Like, I guess I'm paying for the vacation. You know, you see it all the time. And we're going to get into that too. And if guys feel taking advantage of the way the girls do when they turn out when they're the breadwinner and they're paying for things. To me, that, my main takeaway of like where I am now is I, I mean, never say never. I always say that, Justin Bieber. I probably am not going to date somebody that makes significantly less than me. I want somebody that is on my level or better. I want something I look up to and respect.

And I want someone that wants to live the same type of life as me. And I'm not over here saying I'm super rich. I make enough to live like a very nice life. And I can travel whenever I want and I can pick up and do spontaneous trips. And I can go out to dinner every single night and I can pay my rent and my bills and those kind of things. And I'm really proud. I worked really hard to get here. But I just, it's that lifestyle. if it doesn't match up, it's like, do you want to make a lot of money or not? Like, if you're just, like, kind of content and complacent with where you are and you don't really care about traveling the world and these things and you don't want to do fun, expensive experiences, like, I just don't think we're going to work

in general. Right. And I think that money, lifestyle, and success are things that you brought up. All three of those things are very different. Like, I mean, at different ages, I've wanted different things. At my age, I would want somebody who could financially contribute. But if you are successful in your field, that's also a different age. trade-off for me. Like, maybe you don't make as much money as me, but you are struggling,

you know, maybe you're in a creative field. You're an artist. You're, I don't know. Or even, like, maybe you're working a nonprofit. Maybe you do something very admirable. Maybe you're like, that's different to me than somebody who just, like, cannot get their shit together. Yeah, there's so many different layers to this. It's like, and then let's talk about just being lazy. Well, that's just fucking canceled. I cannot be with somebody. Well, right. But like, that's, you've got to figure that on your head. You have got, women have got to get to this point where, and it's difficult when you're younger, because some people just, like, fuck around until they're in their later 20s, and then they do make it. It happens.

But, like, you've got to, like, be able to figure this out. And sometimes it takes a while, you know, Rain and I are in our 30s? Took a long time to get here. Like, where you're like, is this person just, like, are they talking all the time about stuff they want to do and they're going to do this and they're going to do this? They have this pipe dream after the next. Or are they, like, actually doers? Are they actually going to, like, do something? And, like, I think you and I both had that experience where we, like, fell for somebody and, like, slowly started to realize, like, oh, this person may never really get their shit together. Right.

Am I always going to be taken advantage of? Am I always going to be, like, compensating? And I think with men, there's a huge ego issue here when, like, your significant other, your partner is always paying for things and is reminding you that they are always paying for things. And that's hard for men. And I want to hear your side of it. And like, let me, I'll just finish up the, I talked about a relationship that I was in where I made more money.

And, like, I didn't feel like I was paying for stuff all the time. Like, this was a person. And this was a person that I, you know, really loved a lot. And, like, I mean, he would, like, want to take me out to dinner and, like, want to do these things. And, like, it was date nights every week. I want to take you out, you know, like, kind of spending the money he did have, like, our and our relationship. And so I, you did some things that, like, and you were younger. But, like, I'm sure you just.

cringe to think about them now. Yeah, but age. You're like fully like sugar mama. Yeah, but age is like a huge, I do we keep saying it's such a huge factor in this. And like, it is. I'm almost thankful that I'm dating in my 30s now because I think it is, you meet people when they're a little more fully formed in their 30s.

You meet somebody that's like 35. And if they've never gotten it together by now, the chances are that they are going to, either like career wise or money wise or just in general, like their life, there's a much smaller, possibility that's going to happen. When you start dating when you're like 22, 23, 24, you're like really rolling the dice on somebody. You don't know. Right. So I think it's perfectly fine if like one person's a little more successful or makes a little more money.

Absolutely. I think it's perfectly normal to have faith in somebody that they are just like everybody going to grow up and struggle and figure it out. In your 30s, people are just much more fully formed and you can just make more like informed decisions. And like, I don't know, keep tabs on somebody. Like are they actually progressing in life in some way? Like, you start dating somebody. They're a waiter at a restaurant like that girl said. Whatever. A year from that, has he done anything?

Is it anything changed? And also, there's also that thing of like, you might really just love somebody that doesn't really have a ton of ambition and they are fine working as a waiter until the end of time. And like, that's a decision you have to make. That's probably not going to be for me.

Sure. But I think that like it's great that you can say that's not for me and you could own it. And I wrote this girl back and I said exactly basically what you is just be clear about what you want and what he wants. And if all he wants is to be a waiter and he's super happy doing that, he likes to talk to people, he likes that schedule and he's comfortable in that lifestyle, then he should tell you that and you should tell him whether you're okay with that.

And there's nothing wrong with dating somebody in the service industry. There's also nothing wrong with you not wanting that either. And I think that as long as everybody is clear about what they want, then that is fine. Maybe somebody is a waiter because they're also trying to like get another business off the ground or maybe they're just happy with that lifestyle. Right. And another relationship that I had, another serious relationship that I had, I, we started dating when we were young, I mean, I met him in college.

So, like, this was like our whole 20s of like, you know, we went back and forth. I've talked about them before. We were always long distance. We were this, we were that, whatever. And I think it finally happened, you know, at that point, you're like, this person could make a ton of money. And so could I. I mean, 23, 24, you're like, I don't really know what I'm doing with my life yet.

I mean, I had a sort of path, but we were both kind of always figuring it out. And then I think I had a point when I was like later in my 20s. And he had kind of finally figured out what he was doing with his life. And we had a conversation about being together together. And I was like, oh, we don't want the same type of life. Like this was the guy that I didn't really love his penny. He was such a super saver. Like, I'm like, I know you have money.

He's just cheap. He was like a penny pincher, which is never going to work for me either. I don't want either extreme. I don't want someone that's thrown another money away. and I don't want a guy that, like, can't spend at all, like, somewhere in the middle. They're scary. And so, or just, like, huge turnoffs. So I remember that having this moment, I feel like, I was like, oh, my God, this guy is, like,

just going to be really fine with, like, a modest, nice little house in some suburb and you sit on the porch and drink sweet tea. And the thought of it, like, gave me, like, hives. Like, I remember one time, you know, he said to me, like, do you ever think you'd want to live in, like, Asheville or Rale? And I was like, have we met? Like, no. Like, I live in Atlanta and it's too small for me.

me. The only place I'm going to New York or L.A. And, like, I had this epiphany of, like, you don't even want to be, like, you don't want to make a ton of money. Like, I want to, like, fly private one day and one day soon. Like, I want to live, like, a badass life. And, like, I just had this epiphany of, like, we don't want the same type of life. And this is actually never going to work. And a lot of that tied into, like, how you want to live. I want to live, like, a nice, luxurious, bomb life. And I want my partner to want the same thing. So this is a concept of maximizers versus satisfiers. Have you ever heard of this before? No, hit me with it.

you're a maximizer and he's a satisfier. So what this is is there's people that are, I mean, it's what it sounds like. Ooh, I love when Raina gets all. You want to maximize your potential in terms of money, career, where you live, how you live. And he's a satisfier. He is satisfied with the status quo. He wants to live, he wants to have a basic job. He wants to have that job for 40 years.

He wants to live in the suburbs, have his kids and a barbecue on Sunday nights. And both, there's nothing wrong with either of those lives. Absolutely not. But those concepts will, those two people can never be together. Wow. Like, really letting this thing. Are you sure? But it's clearly I just literally explained that, but I just never put it in those terms.

And like, that's so true. So I think we want to leave you guys with a lot of takeaways in this and that's going to be a main one. Yeah. I guess I can talk about like sort of what I went through. Yeah. Tell me your experience. I talk about this a lot on the show. I mean, you know, I was with somebody for, I don't know, a whole long time, three years.

who could never really get it together. We met when he was pretty young. So there's no reason for me to ever expect that he wouldn't someday get it together. After three years of being together and six jobs that he went through, it became a little more clear that he was never going to get it together.

But as I became more successful and super proud of myself for different things that I was trying, I left restaurants, I went to work at a tech startup, and that went really well. And I kept making more money. and getting more responsibility and that stuff was super fun. I was so proud of myself to have tried something and succeeded at it. And not only did he make less money than me, but he was trying all these things and

failing, I guess, for like a better, lack of a better, whatever. Yeah. And so I was just making more money and I was more successful. So it wasn't just the money. Right. It was the success. Yeah. And I think those two things combined were just like a horrible tornado of shit.

Well, you can't, I mean, and when you are not happy with your life, it is real hard to be a real hard to be a success. on somebody that's just like killing it. It's just like, how do you even be around that person? Right, and I don't think he wanted to begrudge me for those things, but it's just normal. You don't want to, yeah, but you're like, I hate myself. And like, her life is amazing and it just keeps getting better.

And I don't know, like, what I would have done differently. Like, you know, there were so many things I wanted to do that I just paid for because it was like, I could pay for it, we could do this, and that'll be fun. Or I can not pay for it. I'm going to resent you that we didn't get to do it. Either way, I'm going to resent you. Right. So I paid for a lot of things.

And I think that that was, I think, he was probably pretty masculating, emasculating for him. Yeah. But he could have done other things to contribute to the relationship. So like... Right. This is what I want to get into. Okay, so I made a little more money.

And I don't want to make it sound like he was like a pauper and I like made a billion dollars. Like that was my relationship too. That wasn't like I wasn't dating some homeless guy at the streets and I'm like a fucking millionaire. Like there was just there was a discrepancy there. But it wasn't like crazy. Right. Well, he was also a bartender. So it was also a lifestyle discrepancy.

I was working all day and he was working all night. So that was really tough and I think we can talk in a different episode about careers and things like that. But I thought at least there were other things he could do to contribute, right? So like there's all these things that we lived together. He could have like dealt with bills and insurance and things like that. I think he could have, I don't know, mopped the floor once a week. I remember saying to him like really nicely like, hey, if you're not going to like, if you're not going to do the dishes, like, could you just like, could you run some water? in the bowls so that when I do the dishes, they're not all crusty.

No, do the fucking dishes. I remember, like, telling one of my exes, like, do you mind helping with the dishes? And he was like, oh, God, yeah, of course. Like, you know, I'm like, there's more dishes now because you're here all the time. Like, I said it in a nice way, but he was like, and then he did the dishes all the time. Remember one time I came home from vacation, he'd, like, clean the sink like I'd never seen it sparkle. I'm like, okay.

I'm like, now I'm ready to fuck. That's a chick. You try to fuck? Try to fuck. Sorry, for party. Clean that sink. I think there were other things he could have done. Like, you know, he was home all day.

He could have made me dinner and left it in the fridge. I all the time would make him dinner and leave him dinner in the fridge. So when he came home at 2 in the morning, he had something to eat in the fridge. Right. I was alone all the time. It sucked. And my mom at one point, it was like, what are you home alone for every day? Oh, is he like at the library studying for his LSAT?

It's like, what the fuck is he doing? Right. And that was tough. and I think it just created like a whole vortex of shit and I felt all the time like, am I so shallow that this is like such a problem for me? Like, what is wrong with me that I'm so empty and I feel so shitty about this?

But the money stuff actually, the discrepancy between Who Made More wasn't really the main issue. There was something that happened that sort of set off a bunch of situations. Some things. Multiple. And I thought about if I wanted to talk about this, but I think it illustrates what happened.

So we were, He was freaking out about money a little bit. This was a time when we were sharing an Amex account. And we both had Amex cards, and we would each pay off the bills separately. But we shared the account so we could share the points. One afternoon we were laying in bed. It was like a Sunday I was going to take a nap, and he was freaking out about money and paying off the card. And I said, okay, well, you know, here's my card.

Just take care of it. Obviously, I meant pay off my part of the bill. Right. Right. Like this is, I'd been paying off my part of the bill always. Right. I went to sleep. I woke up and I had a little alert on my phone that my debit account was overdrawn, which was, which is crazy because I had tons of money in it. Right. And I realized that he had used my debit card to pay off not only my part of the credit card, but his. Right. And it's just shocking. I mean, you've told me this before, but it's still just like I can't. What? How do you think that's okay? And this was not an untrustworthy person. So my initial reaction at first was like trying to understand like... Was so bold because he wasn't trying to sneak around. He knew you were going to see where your money went. Right.

And at first I was like... This is just him thinking is entitled to your money. I was like, I don't understand what you did. And he was like, well, you said take care of it. And I was like, you knew that that's not what I meant. Get yourself out of debt with my checking account. Let's not act like I'm not smarter than you. And you can fool me out of this.

So throughout the day, I just got like more hysterical and to the point where I was like, you robbed me. Right. Like you stole from me. Right. You put you, you were in a situation where I trusted you, and I was sleeping next to you, took my credit card and paid off your credit card. Right.

Like, what a horrible thing. Right. So then we're in a situation where I'd already been, I'd already given him quite a bit of money. He, I'd loaned him several thousands of dollars. So we're at a point where he owes me $10,000, which is not a point that I want to be at. No. So we're not at a point anymore where like, I make more money than him.

We're at a point where like, I'm the bank. Right. And over the next few months, a lot of things happened. to be bar-tending where he would be going out after work and partying and drinking and taking a cab home. And it's like when you are in debt, $10,000 to your fiancé, fiancé, girlfriend, whatever, anybody. Right, anybody. To Verizon, you cannot, you don't, you can't afford to do these things. And that turned me into a crazy monster. Which is so, like, understandable. That's so wild. I'm like, I don't know what kind of advice to give somebody that this is happening to, because

I do. Keep going. I didn't handle it the way I should have, you know. Like, he wasn't paying me back, and I didn't know how to ask for the money. And every time I bring it up, he'd be like, you're emasculating me. It's like, well, I don't know when Con Ed reaches out for my electric bill. I don't, like, write them in an email bag, like, oh, my God, you're making me feel so small. Like, I pay them. I pay them the money that I owe them. The bill collector's call, and you're like, stop it, you're making me insecure.

I'm triggered. I'm triggered. Shut up. Can you? He owes you 10 grand. He's emasculating himself. Right. And like, I don't know what I should have done. I should have been like, well, you know, in good faith, can you give me $100 a week? Right. There was no even in good faith to pay me back. And at that point, I would say, like, when you are truly being taken advantage of, you walk away.

Well, I mean, I just feel like when it's a crazy thing to need to borrow that much money from your significant other. I think you should understand when you start to get that habit, how, like, shitty that's going to make your situation and to top it off with, like, going out and partying and doing all that stuff. Like if someone, if my significant other got in a really tough spot and like I had to lend them money, like they weren't not be going out and spending money. I'm sorry you need to stay in for a couple months and save money and not take cabs home and be partying and spending. Like that's, those two things together are so disrespectful. And again, like I probably would have done the same thing if I were you, you were a lie younger. That's not going to happen to you today.

And you didn't know what to have. You were like engaged to this person. Like what you probably just were being like optimistic. And like a little night. This wasn't like. This wasn't like some piece of garbage. Right. I trusted him.

And, you know, it just, it turned me into a person I didn't like. It turned me into a person that had to say sentences like, people who owe you $10,000 can't take cabs home. I hate it saying things like that. They make you feel crazy, which is so fucked up. So, I mean, my, I would say to anyone that's dealing with a situation similar to that, I think that's a huge red flag. I think that's a sign of things to come. And I think that that's the relationship.

I don't know, I don't know about ending a relationship when someone knows you a bunch of money. You never get the money back. But I feel like that's a relationship that you usually. should like consider ending. And like if this person really needs you in their life and they want to keep you around, they're going to do what it takes to pay you back and get you back. Like I, I think that's a scary cycle to get into. Right. And when you're thinking about marrying somebody and then their debts become your debts, it is very frightening what somebody can do. And I, I wasn't extra sensitive because honestly, I didn't know what happened between my parents at that time. I didn't know

that my father had done things like this to my mother. So I wasn't being hypersensitive. I just didn't know what the hell to do. Right. And I do, you know, I mean, I hate to say it. Like, the older we get, the more, I like to say realistic, but a little jaded where you're like, oh, no, fuck this. But like, you know, you're in your 20s. You're like, this is fine. I'm fine. Everything's fine. But no matter what age you are, it's normal to be like, I love this person. I want to help them. They're in a jam. And like the quote we said before, I signed up for this. For some people, it probably would have been fine. Lots of people are in relationships where women make more money than men. And they're fine with it. this particular person in this particular situation didn't work for me, and I'll own that today and just look back and say it's not for me. And I'm glad we didn't get married and I wouldn't have liked it and I wouldn't appreciate it.

And I don't want that life. Well, but I mean, let's just talk about what you just said, being taken advantage of. And so there's such a difference. Like, that's where you have to like really sit down with yourself. And as I'm talking to the guys here too. Like let's be clear. Like this is, if someone's making more money and they're paying for more things, Like, you need to sit down and realize, do I feel taken advantage of?

There's a huge difference there. There's a huge difference between, I'm happy to pay for this because this person, you know, makes me dinner every night or this person is supporting me in these other ways or this and that. Like, there's a ton of things in a relationship that hold value, a ton. Is this person just bettering my life in some other way? Are they saving me time in some way? Like, there's all these things.

And so, but then there comes a point where you're like, wait a minute, am I just like fully carrying the relationship on my back? Like, am I being actually taken advantage of? Like, is this person living with me? and not even paying a utility bill? Like, are the, what's going on here? And I think that's like, sit down, fucking write it out if you need to. I mean, I think that's where it comes down to.

And we had this conversation of like, do guys feel taking advantage of the way that women do? I'm like, I think so. Well, I think that it's not really talked about a lot. I think like it's super normal for a woman to say, like I said, you know, I was paying for all this stuff and I fucking hated it. But like, I don't think that is necessarily talked about as much in society where men are like, okay, like, I make just as much as she does. Why do I have to carry the bills all the time? weird to me. Like I, and again, like, I think we all can tell. I'm a feminist, but like, I don't

think a guy should have to like spend all his hard earned money on a woman. And like, unless they both want that life, unless it's they want this traditional gender roles and the plan is that like, she just doesn't need to have this super career because she's going to raise the kids. And like, that's fine. If both people want that, they're both aligned, that's cool. Or the guy's like, no, no, no, I like to pay for everything because she cooks and cleanses you. apartment and this type of thing and just both people have to be on the same page about it. But I think it's so crazy that women just like expect men to just like pay for all their shit. Right. Especially, especially if you make comparable amounts of money.

Oh my God. That's wild to me. That's so crazy to me. It's so unfair. And look, every relationship's different. I'm sure that most people have been in relationships where they've talked about money. Most people have a conversation. I think you need to. If you haven't, I would really advise every person in a relationship to talk about money and don't let this spiral out. to control into some crazy thing because I have guy friends that have paid for their girlfriends over and over and over again and that have said to me like, I don't even know how to approach this because like she makes just as much as me. This is not fair. Right. And we all know I have a lot of

opinions on paying for things and not wanting a guy to just sponsor my life and sponsor all of my nights out. I have some pretty strong rules by Ashley. I think we've talked about this a little bit before, I am happy to recap. I do think when it comes to dating, like you're talking about going on dates, like first, second dates. I think a guy should pay for a first date, first place. I've said this before. I'm at the point in my life where if a guy asked me out, we go out for drinks, a tab shows up, what's 60, 70 bucks, you know, that's four drinks in New York City, whatever. I don't even do the wallet reach. I'm sorry, I don't. I'm just kind of like, you ask me out. It took me a long time to get ready. And like, I think there's a balance there too of it takes us

a lot more effort to get ready. And I know that's beauty standards and all this stuff. That's not also guys like to be looking good for girls, but all it takes is them going to fucking Equinox and like lifting some weight. It's like we need to do like the hair, the makeup, the contour and the outfit pick out, all these things. And this sounds so cliche, but like that takes time and energy and time is money. And I think that like you ask a girl out, she shows up looking put together, fucking buy the drinks. And this is not, Brady. You're like, what are you holding back from? Just fucking say it. I'm thinking about if I should, if somebody should bring their receipts from

Sephora to a date, just to prove how expensive it is to look the way that you look. Every time I walk into Sephora, I buy one eye shadow palette. I'm bankrupt. Right. That was a funny, we posted this, what is his name? He's on Instagram and Twitter, Sergeant, the Sarge, they call him, we posted one of his memes or his tweets

and he was like, yes, guys should always pay for the first day. Do you know how much a trip to Sephora cost? Or something like that. And this is a man. This is like an alpha male. Five pieces of makeup is $200. Right. And, you know, you're not buying those for every date, but I just think there, we've talked, there's this balance of things. It's like, you know what?

I'd pay for the drinks if I could just show up in a fucking dirty t-shirt and look amazing. Like, we just have more to do. Like, and it sucks to go on a date. And then you, the guy wanted you to go Dutch for your two fucking cocktails and you got to go home and take your makeup off and do your skincare routine. No, you're buying those drinks. But you're such a feminist ass.

You really think guys should pay for drinks? Shut up. Okay. So Michelle Wolfe has a special called Nice Lady. I love it because clearly Michelle Wolf is a hardcore feminist, but the opening of this special, if you guys ever watch her stand-up special, is so funny. And she's going off about feminism and all this stuff. And she's like, but I'm not like a buy-your-drinks kind of feminist.

I was like, Granny, you're going to love this. But I will say that I'll just cite a brief example that I went out with a guy recently. I talked about it. He was so into me. He had a really good time. And we went out for nine hours. And we went for the first drinks. He bought them, rooftop drinks, what, $47 fucking dollars apiece in New York City?

So, you know, huge tab for us to have a few cocktails. And then we went to dinner. And I was happy to split the dinner. And we went for another round of drinks. I bought the round of drinks. I'm a big believer in when you switch locations and you're able to pick up a tab, you pick up a tab. Or maybe you pick up the Uber or you do something to show that, like, I don't expect you

to sponsor my entire night. And that's how I operate. And I think that you get into a relationship. And I think you're kind of paying for what you make. Like I was talking to a good girlfriend. She makes a lot of money. And I was asking her about this. and her last boyfriend, she was like, he probably made like a little bit more than me.

And if I were to say what we paid for, it was probably like 60-40 once we were in a relationship. We're taking trips. We're going on dates. We're going to dinner and stuff like that. So my take is always first date, first location. Ashley is not a feminist on the first day. No, we're equal now because of what this spent to get ready. It depends on what the date is, what you're saying.

One day you offer a couple cocktails, you sit at a bar. You ask me out. Like, you could pay for a couple of cocktails. Right. Like, especially a first date, I think that you should. Most men try to do the right thing. They pay for, like, drinks, whatever. But an all-night-long thing like this, especially if you're never going to see the person again.

Right. And now that guy's $300 in the hole and I'm not going out with him again. Right. He should have just bought a prostitute for that kind of money. That's crazy. Yeah, but my... At least you would have gotten late. And look, there's a million scenarios that can come up.

First dates are different than long-term relationships. There's relationships where one person really does make five times more than. than the other person. And then it's unfair. It's like, well, you make so much money, so you should pay. Right. If you want to fly private and, like, get box seats at a sporting event, then you pay. Right. But I also think there's some professions that are naturally going to make a lot less money than other people. Teachers. A female teacher is never going to make as much money as, like, I don't know, a lot of other professions. And so, like, you shouldn't be punished for having a job that makes less money. Well, and I'll just, I'll say this, that my mom is

a teacher. And let's talk about the, like, the family here. My dad obviously made a lot more money than my mom. My dad had a successful business. But had to have a wife that's a teacher is the dream. You get the best benefits. And then my mom is like home with us with over the summers. I mean, to have a, we were so lucky to have a teacher as a mom. And so I think that like that tradeoff is like, of course my dad's making so much more money. But like, oh my gosh, like my mom has like, is able to raise us in the best way because we have the same schedule. And like the benefits are like, I mean, definitely, like, I think that's kind of my brother wants that life. He's like, I just want to have what we have. You know, I'm fine to make a lot more money, but like, you marry a teacher.

That is like the way to go. That's the goal, teacher? And the benefits. But also like when you have kids, again, we talk about like who, like, who contributes what in a relationship. Like, I'm talking about before you are married, before you have children. Like, you are both making the same amount of money. You both need to contribute. Oh, Mike, I can't even imagine otherwise. Like, again, I think it's, if I just dated some guy, I've never done this, that made like so much money. Like, yeah, I think I would expect him to pay for more because it just means less to him. Like, kind of the same with me. Like, sometimes I have friends and I know that they make less than me.

And like, I like to pay. Like, it's kind of like, why should you have to, like, struggle? Like, the money means less to me to you because I make a lot more. Or if you're the kind of person that makes somebody. If you're the kind of person who makes money but don't want to be taking advantage of then don't do things the other person can't afford, you know? Right. Like, do a cheaper thing.

Right. Yeah. Okay. What about somebody who makes a lot of money, but they're super cheap? I would never. Cheap, I can't deal with cheap. And like that, if there's one of my main acts that, like, I talk about, the thing that we fought about was me trying to get him to spend less. Like, I'd be like, stop doing this.

Like, I remember we went out one time for a dinner. This is a great story, by the way. We got a fucking fight. I mean, we fought all the time. Like, we went out to dinner and the dinner was, it was comped because, you know, we get shit for free. And we went to, like, have a cheap night out. Nice dinner, but it was free. and like I remember he just wanted to tip $69 to be funny.

I'm laughing because it is fucking funny, but I was like, stop. Like the whole point was to like save money tonight. Like tip whatever, the $30 or $40 like normal like you would. And he was like, no, I just want to leave $69. And I'm like, it was a fight because I was like, you need to save more. But like. But I think that's a really interesting story because like the fight that ensued because you who made more money

was telling him, hey, like, you were coming from a good place. I don't want you to spend $70. Yeah, that's crazy. It's like lighting money on fire. And again, but like... And he looks at you and it's like, fuck you.

And this is somebody that, you know, worked in the service industry, so wanted to tip big, which I find very attractive. You don't want a bad tipper. How bad. But his mindset, I would take over a cheap guy any day.

Like, and my other kind of main series X was, I mean, I would say cheap. And I mean, I've dated a couple of their guys, a few that are like cheap. And like, it's so disgusting. Nothing makes your vagina dry up faster. I mean, it is just like, I will take the spendier guy any day. And I'm not saying that it's going to work out because I don't want somebody that's just like lighting money on fire.

But like a million percent. No, no, no penny pinchers. No, like, no bad tippers. Like, no, go fuck yourself. I don't know. I'm sort of like in the middle about this. It depends on why you're being cheap. Are you being cheap?

Because, like, if you're staying within your means because you're saving for something or, like, a house, whatever, like you live in New York City, you're saving up for, like, an avocado toast. Something like that. $23 do you breakfast to New York? Millennials can't afford houses because the avocado toast. Remember that fucking article. That's true. That's why we read, because we love our avocados.

If he's being cheap because, like, he wants the nitro cold brew as opposed to, like, the regular ice coffee. then like, I get it. But like, I think the moral of all these stories is make sure you're aligned with your partner and make sure that you have the same lifestyle and want the same lifestyle. And like maybe money isn't a huge factor in that case. But like talk to your partner about this. And like, I think everybody should feel licensed to do what they want. If somebody doesn't make a lot of money and you don't like that and that sucks

and walk away from the relationship and own that. And if you want to stay with somebody and be the person that makes way more money and you're comfortable with that, then great. good for you. Like, I think that it's like 2018, do whatever you want. Yeah. I mean, obviously, we're totally in agreement on this. And I think that, you know, a lot of times I hate to even be cliche. A lot of it comes down to like really assessing what you want and like also communicating with your partner. And I'll say that money is very difficult for some people to tackle in a relationship. And if that is something you guys cannot really figure out, like that is sometimes to bring in a third

party. You know, like, that's where I, I'm not against, like, ever seen, like, a therapist or anything like that. And, like, sometimes when situations are literally so impossible for you to kind to talk about, like, sometimes that is time to, like, have a mediator. I mean, if you're going to get a mediator for anything, I think money is fine. Yeah, I kind of do. It's not an easy thing to talk about. It's why a lot of people get divorced. It causes a lot of problems. And, you know, I was so fortunate to actually, like, see the person I was going to marry. I saw him very recently. and, you know, we would have been married at this point for three years. And it was this really nice opportunity to sort of like look through the looking

glass of what my life would have been with him for the last few years because he's still bartending and he lives with like a couple of roommates. And that's his lifestyle. Do you know what I mean? But like I know looking back, like I couldn't have been married to this person for the last three years. I wouldn't have wanted that. Right.

A lot of it is the lifestyle more than the money. Like I don't care if you want to be a bartender, be a fucking bartender. like I probably couldn't be with somebody that was coming home at three, four clock in the morning all the time that didn't know what their paycheck was going to look like and we couldn't plan for the future and things like that. For me, it was probably more lifestyle than specifically money. But I'll own it and just say like I wouldn't have been happy and I wouldn't have liked it and I probably would be divorced by my 30s and I wouldn't have had children with that person

and I would have been terrified all the time about what he was going to do to me. Right. And I think on the flip side, don't get so caught up and like, is this person make this certain number. Like, I don't know. Are they providing value in, like, other ways? Do they really love you? Like, you don't have to be rich. A lot of women just want a rich guy. It's like, I mean, assess what you really want. You also don't want to, you also don't want to wake up and and be in your mid-30s and be like, oh my gosh, I threw all these guys away because they didn't make 500K, you know?

100%. Money is never going to make you happy. Like, I think that's a great point. It's like, you know, I would say the person I've been the most attracted to in like a long time is somebody who actually probably doesn't make money, but I respect what he does. I think he's funny and smart and interesting. And that's a personal decision to be with somebody that doesn't make as much as you, but that you respect it adds value. And I mean, is this person motivated or not? I would rather date a guy that's making less doing stuff that he's passionate about

motivated than some trust fund lazy ass. I don't know that I would vibe with somebody like that because I didn't grow up with that. I mean, it can happen. But yeah, I didn't either. Neither of us, you can't have picked up on it, right? Neither of us grew up with, like, you know, trust funds, silver spoons. My parents are so rude. She's, like, had, like, regular-ass jobs, like, regular-ass people.

Fucking mom was a teacher. What the fuck, mom? Bitch. We had the best summers ever because you were home with us. I don't care. My parents, like, could take me to baseball games and, like... I wish I didn't nanny. I wish my mom didn't get to race me.

I wish I had, like, a house and veil and a private jet. Yeah. Parents are so rude for regular jobs. Fuck having stable parents that love you. Fuck you, mom. Anyways, I would just say, own what you want, be honest with your partner. And if you are honestly scared to have those conversations, bring in the media, there's no, there's no shame in that. Lots of people do.

Yeah. Ash, I'm proud of you. Just keep killing it. I am. Did this come off as very like, I'm the man? No, I don't think so. I'm proud of you. I'm proud of you.

I'm proud of me too. Sister. And the love fest. Did we do this topic justice? I think so. I'm looking at my notes. I think I covered everything that I thought about. I just feel like there's so many things to be sad.

And I would love to do this conversation with a guy also and just hear like a man's point of view. But like I think that like this is such an exciting interesting topic and an exciting time in like 2018 to like be alive and dating. So I hope that you guys feel good about the topic. Also, do you want to wrap up with like a silly fun game? Did you do any? I did. We're going to do a little fuck, merry kill? Yeah.

Okay. Yeah. Okay, so we're going to keep it quick. We're on a time schedule today. I know. I always like when we have a super serious topic to like lighten this shit up. So we're going to do fuck Mary Kill. Do you want to kick it off with one of yours?

Yep. Okay. Wow. I'm so excited about this one. Fuck Mary Kill. Shep. Dale Moss Jared freed

Oh you did not You did not use our former guest Yes I did Of course Are those the three you chose? I added I subbed in one person Crispy

No Okay you got to answer this Broken Day Ross Oh my god duh Sorry okay so hopefully you guys have heard All these former episodes Okay you got to answer this though I went I did Shep Dale Jared

Okay Shep Dale Jared Okay, I always use my process of elimination because it's just like, who do I want to marry, who I want to fuck, and I just kill the last person. It's funny because you usually base it on money, and that's what the episode is about. Okay, I think that Dale is the nicest guy of all of those guys. And hottest. So I'm obviously going to marry him. Oh, you're going to marry Dale.

I'm going to marry Dale. Back off my man, bitch. And then you get to have sex with him. Like, that's the caveat. No, we decided not. I can't fucking. You can't, no. It's.

Can I lick his ass? and have a great intimate relationship, but you're not fucking someone else. Can I blow him? Oral sex count? You're getting upset thinking about me blowing Dale. Getting jealous. Okay, fine. No, but I think Marydale.

As long as I can, like, lick his abs every once to a while. I'm going to fuck Shep. I'm very attracted to Shep. Ew. You are? I hated that episode. Give me a 6'4 guy I was in face for her. Okay, you're going to fuck Shep.

You're going to kill Jared. I'm going to kill Jared. I mean, I love Jared. Jared. Jared might actually hear this. I love Jared. I think he's fucking so funny. But like, I don't know. He can also like tell some jokes while I'm killing him.

You know I want to fuck Jared because he is like such a loud, huge talker. I'm like, is he like that in the bedroom? I just want to find out. We asked a friend of ours who had slept with Jared what it was like yesterday. Okay, you go. You go. I'm going to throw this back on you. Previous guest edition.

Yes. Crispy Ross, Jeremy. from people. We crushed this. I know. Crispy, Ross, and Jeremy. Oh, my God. I've slept with one of these people.

So you want to know how it was? I'm not going to say which one. I'm going to marry Jeremy. Oh, my little angel. Because he's like, would be a good companion. I just love him. I love him. I love him.

Married Jeremy for sure. I'm not fucking Ross's broken dick. I'm not doing it. So I'll fuck Krispy. I'll care of Ross, whatever. I hope other people think this is as funny as I do. If they've listened, they do. So if you guys haven't, sorry, that's on you.

Oh, poor Rob. Should we just do like one more each? Yeah. Okay, God, how do I choose? All right. I'm going to do sex addict edition, Tiger Woods. This is so good. Charlie Sheen. David Duchovny.

Oh, my God. David DuCovny. Is he an actual sex act or just on sex in the city? No, no, no. He actually like went to, like, he was actually. actually like hospitalized for sex. Okay. Kill Charlie Sheen right off the bat.

Like I just am so... You're going to get some diseases from him too. I think he's so gross. This is so easy. Definitely going to fuck Tiger Woods. I just want to see what that's about. You love black men so much. Blasian.

Is he Asian? Because black people have big dicks and Asian people have small dicks. I'm really trying to see what's going on down there. Okay. And then Mary... Is that offensive? It's true. I know the stats.

Everything that comes out of our mouth. I'm like, is that? I literally just yelled you like black dudes. That is not offensive. It's not offensive if it's the truth. And who am I marrying again? David Duchovine. Love him.

He just looks like a little angel. I love that you did sex out of condition. I did Murderer Edition. O.J. Simpson. Ted Bundy. He's hot. Or Jordan Vandersluat. All of them because they could be like,

I'm murdered that pussy. Beat the pussy up. Oh, my God. You have to answer. O.J. Ted or Jordan Vandersloot? Okay, first of all, I was... Fuck very ill. I was Googling Ted Bundy while I was getting a manicure the other day,

and I think that I really scared the manicure. Because I was so deep into Ted Bundy, Wikipedia. If you were deep, you... You'll go deep. I'm sweating so bad. Oh, my God, okay. I don't know who Jordan Vader'sluth is. He's pretty cute.

You're a fucking. fucking of OJ Simpson because I feel like Ashley would just be so jealous. I don't know if I'd be my dad so I can like be a Kardashian. What? People say he's Corey's dad. That's the joke. Okay, let's wrap this up. Okay.

I really do want to have sex with a serial killer, so I'm fucking Ted Bundy. You're fucking Ted Bundy. For sure. You're not going to marry Jordan Vandersloot. Who do you think makes the most money? O.J. Right? Yeah, yeah.

Mary OJ. Oh, I'm marrying OJ. I'm fucking Ted Bundy because I should. I want to have sex with a serial killer. And I'll kill Jordan VaynerSlooth. Okay. The hottest I've ever been in my whole life. This was a doozy.

I love that I did sex addict edition. You did murder her edition. Listen, we're sorry to all of our guests that we talked about having sex with and murdering. I'm sorry I admitted that I slept with one of our guests, but you'll never know which one. You'll never know. Okay, guys, thank you so much for tuning in to the Money Edition. if you want to Venmo us, feel free. After we're both like, we make so much money.

I'll always take more money, though. If everyone of our guests could Venmo us, I'll always take your money. I'll always take your money. A dollar today. 4-69. Raina Greenberg and Ashley Hustleton on Venmo. Anyways, thank you guys so much. We're so excited about this episode.

Thank you for tuning in. You can follow us on Instagram at Girls' Got to Eat Podcast. That's all that I do, just the Instagram account. We have Facebook. We have a Twitter. We don't have a Snapchat, but Rainey goes in there to use the filters sometimes. Oh, like you, like everybody on Earth doesn't. I mean, yeah, I'm never without a filter.

People are like, what do you do for your skin? I'm like, a filter. Right. What? It's six filters on seven different apps. What do you mean? Like, I don't look like. People meet me.

I'm actually 700 pounds. You just don't know. Oh, that's a real skinny filter. Okay, guys, subscribe, rate review. We love reading your reviews. Keep putting us in your Instagram stories. Keep having group text about us. We love it.

It really builds our ego up. Oh, shout out. to a girl that I met yesterday. They were going to do a book club. They decided reading books was too difficult. They segued to a content club where they were going to read one article per week, change their minds, and now it is a Girls Got to Eat podcast club. I can't even.

So shout out to these girls. Love you. Thank you so much. So everybody do that. And we will see you next week. Thanks, guys. Have a great week.