Girls Gotta Eat - Should You Date Your Co-Workers?

Episode Date: September 17, 2018

Dating in the workplace: Fire.....or fired? We discuss the age old question of whether it's a good idea, give tips for how to do it right if you're gonna do it, and share our own experiences with getting off at the office. Then we bring in Jared Freid and Jordana Abraham of U Up? podcast (one of our faves) to play a very special round of Is This Weird? Rayna and Ashley also give updates on their quests for men in uniform. Listen to U Up? wherever you listen to podcasts, and follow them on Insta @UUpPod. Follow Girls Gotta Eat @GirlsGottaEatPodcast, and check our website for upcoming live show dates! See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Do you want to talk about your experience in this? I mean, I rarely have had a workplace in my life that I didn't sleep with someone. Welcome back to another episode of Girls Gotta Eat. Hi. I get nervous every week. What do I say? I do too. I'm like, as soon as I'm done with this thing, Sonny intro, like, what is going to come out?

What's going to come out? Okay. What's today? No, no, no, now I know. As always, we're coming to you guys from Mouth Media, powered by Senheiser. It's our media company. They have all kinds of really great podcasts that record here as well, so check them out. It is September 17th.

You guys tell them the date, like they don't have a phone that they're listening on? We have had our live show. It was amazing. There will be a bonus episode where you'll be able to listen to what happened at the show coming soon, but this is just a regular episode. And it's just me and Ashley today. It's just us. Well, actually, it's not true. We actually have guessed.

Oh, my, what are we doing? Sorry, guys. Should we start over? No, keep on. All right, guys. Just a reminder, keep leaving ratings on iTunes and Spotify.

Hit that five stars for us. We really, really appreciate it. Keep telling your friends. We want to be number ones on the chart every single week. And if we're not, it's not because we didn't create a good podcast.

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Girls Gottaeapodatopodcast.com. Click on shows. It will be there. Girls Gotta Eat Podcast. Shop for the merch. We're the merch to the shows. I'm just saying there might be a benefit to doing that. So we highly recommend it.

And should we get into it? Yes, sis. What's going on? You were gone. I was gone for a while. Then I was with family and friends. Now you were gone. You were back in Pittsburgh.

Did you miss me so much? I did miss you. And so I was like, well, I guess I'll go out of town too. So I went to my best friend, my best friend, Corey's, baby's first birthday party and went to Delaware just a little day trip this past Saturday. And I was so great to see friends, my best friends and the baby, but also they had like the best food. It was like Chick-fil-A tray.

Meatballs. All my favorite foods. I wish I would have come. But I took Amtrak. Okay. And I know you're always talking about the subway talent. So much talent. The Amtrak talent, the staff.

This is a thing? Okay. All right. You're going to train people? Conductors. So there was this guy. Come stand my ticket, baby. Click me.

The smoking hot guy. And I noticed I took the train. I took it there at like noon and I got back at night. So I did like a one day. Like I went there, came back in the same day. So like I think the same staff, like the same people. I saw him on the train. I was like this guy is so hot.

It's really attractive. And I was like, I don't know. I'm like feeling his vibe. But then I got off the train in Delaware. Got back on the train. He's there again. And I just kept looking at each other. I was like, I feel like he's going to like

come talk to me. To ask for your ticket. Okay, yeah. But also, I write my number on my ticket. That's a solid move. I know. What if I, like, wrote my number on my, like, MTA, like, unlimited car? You know how you, like, show him the E ticket?

It's just, like, a nude. He's like, let me see your ticket. I'm like, how about this nude? It's your vagina. You're like, how about this ticket? Then I was like, I was like feeling. I was like, I bet he's going to talk to me. Like, maybe I'll just, like, flirt with this guy for the rest of the trip.

Whatever. We were both in the cafe car. We stopped in Philly. He was the sandwich guy? No, they were just in the cafe car. There was like a reserve booth for the conductor. Are they conductors? What am I?

I think there was the drives the train is a conductor. Right. So they're just like the ticket checkers? He's a ticket checker. All right. The bar is low. I will say I actually know somebody that failed that there is, it's like a pretty specific exam.

You have to take to get that job. It's not like anybody can just do that. Okay, okay. You have to know about trains. You have to know. I don't know if you'd be able to drive the train, but it's not just like, you're not working for the MTA, just like swipe and drink it. Okay.

So he's game. employed. Yes. It's a skilled position. We stop in Philly and then all of a sudden he walks back into the cafe car with his little daughter. I'm like, where did this bitch come from? Oh, he had a kid. He had a kid and she was on the train. Where does she come from? I want to know. Like, I'm so confused. Who brought her on the train in Philly? I'm so baffled. I'm like, Shark Tank. I'm like, and for that reason, I'm out. And for that reason, I was out. Like, all of a sudden, I'm like, what is this daughter? Where does she come from? I don't know. I mean, I guess like if I'm a single dad and I got to work all day, I'll like take my daughter to work and ride the train. But she just appeared in Philly and then rode with us to Penn Station.

With us, like you two are a couple that she got on the train to ride with you guys. It is. I don't know how many cars are going to train, right? There's like, I don't know how many cars are in a train 20. Like she could have been on another car. It's not like she's just hanging out in sandwich room. I just want to know what she came from. Like she came in, she had her backpack. One of the other 19 cars. But who was watching her in the other car. Maybe her mom. Her mom. God damn it. All right. How was your weekend? I'm over trained guys. It was bleeding.

Irish guys, train guys. I'm just checking them off the list. I didn't say right off Irish guys. Just like guys who clearly are at work with like their daughter and their kid and their their wife. Right. Red flag. Red flag or deal breaker. His wife and his child are at his job.

All right. Rana, how was your wife? My girl was good. I flew to Pittsburgh on Friday night. You got recognized. in the airport. No, someone saw you and didn't come talk to you. They were like scared and starstruck. Like freaking out with her friend that they had seen May. And they sent, we love when you guys send us to your text message exchanges about the podcast, about celebrity sightings when you

see us. It was very cute. Someone sent this text message that they have with their friends and they spotted Raina. And it said she's so cute. IRL. It literally made my day so hard. It was so cute. So anyways, yeah, I flew to Pittsburgh, coordinated to land at the same time as my brother and his wonderful wife. who like we're obsessed with. We are. Miss them. Miss you every day. Think about you every day.

And we were there for the holiday. We went to the Penn State Pit game on Saturday, which was super fun, watched the Steelers game on Sunday, big sports family. A lot of, how do I say this? My life there is very different than my life here. When I land in Pittsburgh, it is like married couples, dogs, tons of babies, lots of noise and commotion. I'm constantly being criticized by my mom for things.

She's every second. I live in a world of crows. criticism and yelling. It's very different than my life in New York, but I do really enjoy it, especially my friend's children. But we have a little situation on Sunday. I sort of alluded to. So, okay. So my mom is a big, beautiful house. She loves to entertain. She decides she's going to have 50 people over for Rosh Hashanah lunch. Like the spread, I was shook. It's crazy. The longest table I've ever seen, the most food I've ever seen. And you guys had to make some of that? Yeah, I mean, she doesn't, what I would do for something like this is I would pick five dishes and make like three of each.

Right. Like catering size. She picks 19 dishes and makes one of each. I mean, there is so much hot mush. So like not everybody can get a taste of everything. I'd be first one in line. I got to get everything. I got to get everything.

I'm the first person in line at every buffet every time. You can't at your own house. Even like over like a bride. At your wedding. I'm there. I'm the first person. Yeah, but if you're the host, which sucks, you've done all the work spent all the money. last. You have to go last? You have to go last. You have to go last. You get the scraps.

No, she made huge portions. She is not fuck around. She is crazy. So during this, during this whole thing. So we get up, she's been cooking for weeks, by the way. She freezes things and whatever. I've become this like babbling it at my house. I can't do anything. She stands at top of me, screams at me about everything. I can't even like roll a pizza dough out without supervision. Bless her heart. Bless her heart. Jews. Jewish mothers. Anyway, so I made monkey bread, which was so bomb. And she's screaming me about the recipes. I have to follow them. And I'm like, mom, there's three cups of oil. And it's like, I can't put the stuff. much oil in it. She's screaming at me that I must put this much oil in the monkey bread.

So it is, we put it in the oven. It is a bucket of oil. So of course, it starts a grease fire. Oh my God. The oven door blows open and flames are shooting out of the oven. I got, I got an Instagram from you, which is my favorite part about the story that your house is on fire and your Instagram story. What else was I going to do? My brother and my mom were handling it. There were flit. I saw, you guys, there were flames coming out of the oven. Flames. And I was like, oh, my God, are you okay?

This is fine. I mean, how many people does it take to put out of fire? Like, what am I going to do to contribute to this fire? Like, my adult brother and my mom, they're on it. Yeah. I'm just filming it for entertainment purposes. For sure. You know, to be sensitive, though, I waited to post the Instagram story until after the fire was out.

Justin gave me died. Because that would be, like, not that funny. If that was, can you know my last post? Posted it and then you guys died. I, the Instagram post would go viral. Oh, and I'd be famous in death. I know. Oh, shit.

I wish we would have died. That's my dream to be famous in death when we have a double funeral. Do you wish I would have died so this podcast could get more famous? No, no, no, no, no. I can never do this without you. I mean, I could. Sam, love you. I would.

I've already picked out a future, I picked out future co-hosts in my mind if you die. Who is it, Katie? No, it's Leve. Of course it's Leve. Okay, well, if I die, this podcast will be hosted by Rain and Love. If Raina dies, this podcast will be hosted by me and Katie Sturino. Listen, I just love him so much, like Little Angel. I know.

Okay. Back to the fire. Anyway, so then I go outside. I'm sitting on my front porch. The fire department shows up. Amazing. Because what else are they doing in the town? And so I naturally asked them to please wait at the bottom of the steps for a second.

Well, I also pull up Instagram to do a boomerang of them walking up the steps. It was the best sequence of videos I've ever got. It's a flames shooting out of the oven. Raina sitting there casually filming. And then the whole fire department walks into her house coming up the stage. I'm like, can you guys just start at the bottom of steps? They're like, what's up? I'm like, I started a fire.

They're like, for real? Yeah. So, as they walk into the house, my mom is, she blocks them. She barricades them at the front door, will not let them come in. They're like, she's cock blocking you. I was already on the porch, so we were already talking. They have muddle over their shoes because it was raining. And my mom's like, you're not coming in this house with those shoes.

My mom had the fucking balls on this woman to tell three grown-ass firefighters. Oh. You're not coming in the house with these shoes. Oh, my God. Your mom literally said take off your firefighter boots. Yes. And the fire chief is like, ma'am. Is the fire still flaming?

Ma'am, it is not legal for me to take these shoes off. I need to come in this house. And my mom says to the firefighter, I have 50 people coming into this house in two hours. You are not coming into my house with those muddy boots. And they look on your face. And so I decided I'm going to make a hilarious joke. And I'm like, listen, guys,

she would rather the house burn down than you guys to come in here with your muddy shoes. So, like, you can't come in. She flipped out on me. Of course she did. It was not funny. It was not taken well. I can't imagine. It was so funny to me.

I can't imagine it was. I appreciate the joke. Thank you. Rain is out here doing bits. The house is on fire. Try not a little lightness to the situation. Anyways, so spoiler alert the house. Did not burn down.

She had to let them into the house. But like the question is, were any of them hot? All of them were hot. Shut up. It's a fire fire. Should we move to Pittsburgh? I cannot go through life without fucking a fireman. I can't.

It's been so difficult. I'm texting Ashley about what's happening. she's like first one to fuck a fireman wins. Not like, are you okay? Did you die? First one of fireman wins. Yep. I'll fuck a fireman.

Pittsburgh. You can try. Katie told us how hard it is. To fuck a fireman. You can't get him. I feel like I don't know where the fire stations are in New York. There is one on 12th and I definitely, I fuck all of them. And also speaking of firefighters.

What? At the end of this episode, we are welcoming two guests to play, is this weird. What does it do a firefighter? One of the questions is about that firefighter. Oh, I forgot. I'm done talking about me and you. It's a good intro to the episode. We have Just Me and Ashley for the episode, and then we are wrapping up.

Yes. Just me and Ashley, like, it's not going to be awesome. They're wrapping up with two people that we are super excited to have on the show. It's the co-hosts of You Up podcast. It's Jared and Jordana. Yeah, so we are going to wrap this up and then we are heading over to Betches. They actually record very close to us in Chelsea and then we're going to play the game with them. So stay tuned for that.

Yes, and you can check us out on their show as well in a couple weeks. We'll plug it all at the end of the show. Yeah. But you survived. I don't have a train boyfriend. And I don't get to have like a lit-ass girl. Nothing changed. Update.

Okay. Neither of us are getting fucked. This week we are talking about something you guys have email, DMed us about a lot. In droves. Yes. You guys really want us to talk about this. So we are going to talk about it. We have some unconventional experiences with it, but it is about dating in the workplace.

You guys really want to fuck your friends and your co-workers. You guys really want to fuck your friends and your co-workers. Every week it's like, how can I fuck my life up with my friends and my coworkers? Yes. So we are going to talk about it. We got a lot, like I said, we got a lot of emails, a lot of DMs. We'll read one just to pick it off. May as well.

And I thought that this is like an interesting email. I think this is something that like we'll talk about it later, but we've all faced. So I like this email. Yeah, this is probably like what's on most people's mind is what this chick sent us. She starts off with, I fucking love your show. Thank you very much. I am one of the people in the world who doesn't normally recommend relationships in the workplace, but understand how they can come about and to come about when it doesn't affect business.

Lately, I've developed a hardcore crush on one of my coworkers. I'm technically one of his leaders, and he's two years younger than me. We go to the same gym and have the same friend group. So, okay, so like lots of connections there. So much. And we often work the same hours directly together. The more I get to know him, the more I really like him and want to date him. My coworkers think we would be really cute and often encourage.

We flirt often, but I am hesitant to say anything to him about my feelings. But he's literally everything that I want in a human. Should I tell him how I feel or should I leave it alone and move on? Thank you for your email. Yeah, thanks. Yeah. This is probably what a lot of people deal with. Yeah.

Lots of stuff to break down because she's his boss, it seems like. Yeah, his leader. His team lead. She said that kind of subtly. I'm his lead. Well, you could be a team lead. Oh, and not be like direct boss. 100%.

I don't know how work. I don't know how real jobs work. I try to forget every day. But just in case, I had a flare up, okay? In sales organizations, sometimes, like, when I worked at Amazon, you'd have, like, four sales reps in a market and you have a team lead that just sort of, like, they're not a manager.

But they're the lead, yeah, they're the team lead. Okay. Not necessarily your direct boss. But if she, like, wanted to, like, fuck with him, she could, if things went south. Probably. That person probably... She has a little bit of seniority over him, obviously.

Yes, that probably had a person, like, if anybody was going to be promoted to a manager, it's that person always. Right. So something to break down is that. They seem to have friends in common. outside of the workplace, they go to the gym together. They seem like they work together in the same hours.

There's a lot going on. I mean, but we just want to start this off by saying this is such a normal thing. I like pulled a couple of stats, approximately 40 to 55 percent of people that are married met their spouses through work. Again, that doesn't necessarily mean in your office, but like somehow through work. That's a crazy statistic. Yeah, 57% of respondents on this survey stated they are having or have had a personal relationship with a colleague. So it's so common. I mean, I haven't worked in a traditional work environment since 2010.

That's when I went on on my own. But yeah, that's who you spend your time with. I mean, a third day. A half of your awake hours. And I think you have common goals and you have things to talk about. Like, it's so natural that feelings would develop that you would, that this would happen. So, I mean, I think that goes without saying. But I think we want to kick it off by just saying like, this is not what we're

weird at all. Of course you're wondering, should I date this person? I can't imagine a person that hasn't experienced this. Like, how have you gone through, like, not thinking about it? You see somebody sober all day long. You see how they, like, problem solve, you joke around them, you get lunch of them. You're probably spending more time with those people than anybody else in your world. Yeah, and that's when you are with somebody and then they have those, like, my workwife, fuck you. Like, one of my exes would call this girl that he worked with his workwife. I'm like, can you stop? Can you Stop. Oh, yeah.

It's super, super annoying. Watch out for that bitch, always. We want to do an episode on this. Like, the, oh, watch out for the workwife. The watch out for the fucking workwife. But I would hate it. And she had a boyfriend and he, now they're married. But like, when he would jokingly say that, I would like tense up every time.

She was, like, beautiful. And they worked together all the fucking time. All the time. And, like. Episode for another day, though. For another day. But you also think about, like, I don't know what half of my friends do all day long. My best friend.

I know all of her coworkers. I'm at her office all the time. I don't know what that bitch does. She, I genuinely have no idea what she does for a living. No one knows. It's like the friends, like no one knew what Chandler did. He's a transponder. Right.

I know that she's, like, in charge of people and, like, I dated somebody she worked with. I slept with this person. Couldn't I tell you what they do for a living? No idea. So it's nice if you can date somebody in the workplace because they actually understand, like, what you deal with all day. It's nice to date someone when you know what they do for a living. What a perk. All right.

The bar is set pretty low for me. I just from someone that I understand their life. Okay, so, you know, I do want to say up top, there's a lot of stuff to break down and you have to think about what is the work environment. Do I work at a restaurant versus a corporate office? How corporate is this environment? Yeah. And then, you know, what is my proximity to this person? Am I in charge of them?

Are they somebody I have to, like, work with every day? Yeah. When I worked in sales, I had to be on teams with people and travel with people all the time. You were with them in a cubicle. five days a week all day. Yeah. So like, you know, do you want to like enter in a situation where like this goes downhill? Like I'm sitting next to you all day. Right. I think that's like such a thing to consider. There's definitely people that work in huge companies and maybe they've been work in a different floor. Like you could really avoid somebody if you needed to if things went south. And then

there's people that are like literally within five feet of each other all day every day. So I mean, yeah, I think there's just there's so much there's so many, there's so much risk involved. That's why some businesses don't like it or allow it or whatever. Yeah, I'd be scared if I had like a pretty serious HR department and like I was in charge of somebody. Like if it's also like how old are you is this your career? Like are you working at a corporate office and you're moving up the up the ranks and your manager are you like a waitress at, not that that's not a career, but like you can

find another waitressing job. It's harder to find another like senior managerial position at a tech company. Right. And I guess that's first off it's just like obviously weighing the risks. if your job is your life and somebody dating somebody in your office or your workplace would get in the way of that, I wouldn't pursue it. But I think that there's, if there's a real strong policy that you can't date at your work or whatever it is, you want to date your boss and that's obviously not allowed and you want to do it. I mean, do what you want to do, but know that you might

lose your job. I mean, I've seen that happen. 100%. So I think let's, we should maybe talk more about what happens when it's allowed, but like it could just, you know, create an awkward situation. But I mean, as far as the like, should I do this, it's not allowed. Do what you're going to do. But like, how important is your job? Right. Don't get yourself fired over a person. Or if you don't like, if you don't care, then get yourself fired.

Whatever. Do you want to talk about your experience in this? I mean, I rarely have had a workplace in my life that I didn't sleep with someone. Okay. Well, I've only, I've worked in restaurants most of my life and I was a waitress and then a restaurant manager. And it's just, in restaurants, you're with people all night long. And then the restaurant shuts down at 1.30 the morning. You're drinking people. Right. Not necessarily me, but other people are doing drugs together. You know, everybody is sleeping around. Everybody's partying together.

It's certainly not frowned upon. And I mean, it's not encouraged. But especially if you're, like, not upper level management, I mean, everybody's drinking and party. It's super normal. I think it gets a little gray when you're somebody's boss. Right. Which is exactly what happened. So I've lived to two men in my life. One of them was my boss at a restaurant and the other one I was his boss. Okay.

Jesus. And how'd that work out? Well, neither rest are together anymore. But, um... I just need to... I need to roast you for when you were like... I was like, I've been dating so much this summer and you were like, how'd that work out.

You still single? Bitch. It was a casual bitch, but you just... You're like, bitch? I will say, you know, what happened with me was I was a manager for a Danny Meyer restaurant, which is like a, if you guys don't live in New York, he's a really, like, world renowned famous restaurant tour. He is most famous for Shake Shack, but owns some really

great restaurants in New York, and they have a big HR department, and it's a pretty, like, above board type of company, so not super encouraged for you to date your employees. And specifically, I was the scheduling manager, so I was in charge of people's money. Right. And, like, what sections they had in schedules and whatever, and there was, I don't know, there was this back waiter that I just really, I remember, like, I met him. and I was just like, who I'm going to go out with my girlfriends and be like, I'm going to fuck this guy. I just like, I can't stop myself. Like, the train has left the station.

Like, I can't stop it. It's just going to happen. I am a huge fan of instant gratification. So I decided. I can see it. I decided to eat the pizza. I mean, the fucking pizza. Right.

Like, we were going to marry the pizza. Yeah, I was definitely. I mean, it was a delicious pepperoni pizza. Meat lovers. But I tried to do the right thing. We were hooking up for like six weeks maybe and it sort of became obvious. that this was going to be like a thing and we were going to date. And so I told my boss.

I just, I wasn't going to lose my job over this. I was not going to have them find out because people if you think people aren't going to find out, you're crazy. Well, and that's, you know, while we're here, I might just take a break and jump in if you don't mind. Like that's kind of one of the things that we, I talked to a very good friend of mine who's been with a guy for years. They actually, they met at work.

Then they worked another job together, whatever. All the details like aren't important. But her main thing was like, don't lie. Like you'll spin this web of lies. Then when it comes out, then you're like trying to back lie about when you met. then you get caught in a lie. I think what you did is like really mature and that's the way to go. You can't, it might be fun. She also said this. She's like, yeah, it's kind of fun at first. It's like forbidden and you're sneaking around. But I mean, a couple weeks do what you got to do. But do not

spin this like web of lies and then you start a relationship based on a lie. And that was like her number one advice was just like the dishonesty. And your relationship is founded on this and you're sneaking around. And you know, then you get caught. And then you're trying to cover up and you're trying to remember what you told people. And I mean, I think, like, don't offer information you don't need to and don't be gossipy and, like, tell who you need to tell and don't be hanging out in the kitchen, like, sharing details of this thing that you have with your coworker. But, like, I think that's the number one thing is, like, be as honest as you need to be

and, like, don't spin this web of lies. And, like, when you're caught, not if you're caught, when you're caught, somebody will find out about this. There's no chance. And also, it's not a way to have a relationship. No, and it felt really shitty. I remember somebody did catch us. We were on the subway train in the most.

morning together. Yeah, you're going to get caught. And one of the waitresses for my job got on the subway train. There are thousands of subway trains in New York City and millions of people, and I worked with 100 people. The probability that a person that we knew was going to get on the subway train, the exact same, it could not happen. It would not, it did happen. But like, of course it did. It did. You know what I mean? The probability is high. Right. So, I mean, I had, and also, like, when you get caught, like, you're going to be the person that lied. You're going to be a manipulator and a liar and deceitual. And that's what you get in trouble for. Right.

You know what I mean? Absolutely. I think in life, like, never lie because you can't go back. It's just, it gets so messy. But it's hard to know, like, when to come clean because, like, six weeks into a relationship is not that long. It's just, like, six, it's a blip on the radar. And to ask somebody, like, I knew once we told my boss that one of us would have to leave

the job. Is that what happened? Yeah. And him and I talked about it. And he based, I mean, working for Danny Meyer, it's a huge restaurant group. And you are lucky to have a job at any of those places. And I knew that he would be able to go work as a waiter at another one of the places or a bartender or whatever. And that's what he ultimately did. Again, it's not like leaving a

huge corporate position. You know, there's a million restaurants. You can go work in another one. But yeah, six weeks in, like we had that talk and we were like, this feels like it's going to be serious. And I can't be your boss. Right. I'm not like I, if anybody found out, God forbid, I would have been fired. Right. You know? Yeah. So yeah. I mean, it's hard to make that call. Well, and aside, I mean, sounds like you had more of like, quote unquote legal situation. But I think the hard part is the, is all the other stuff. Like when it goes south. Like, I think that's all the stuff to consider. Totally. I mean, can you imagine, like, being in a situation where you just have to see somebody every day? No. Well, I, just talking about the restaurant thing, I remember I was a

waitress at a restaurant at the beach when I used to live at the beach, and weekend one, or day fucking one. I, like, this guy was cute and I hooked up with him. I was young, it was like 20 years old. I wasn't thinking about any sort of ramifications. And like, we hooked up, whatever, he wasn't feeling me like that, whatever it was. I did like him. It's fine. I ended up dating someone else that whole summer. But with it, I think like a week later after this guy and I hooked up for the worst time, he started hooking up with someone else from the restaurant. And like those first few weeks of like seeing them flirting back in the back in the walk in the walk in. I was, it was torturous. And like, I can't imagine that in a real office situation. Like I've never dated somebody in a real job scenario. But I'll say this. I mean, my my main ex, like we met at a comedy show. I mean, that's work related. Like, and as we started dating, we were working on private. projects together. We wrote a TV pilot together. We were the talent. Like, we were together all the time. We were like negotiating contracts together, doing this, doing that. And when we broke up, we would still get booked on shows together sometimes. And it was brutal. And I guess I was, I mean,

imagine that. Like, I go up and do my set. I just, it was, in a creative field also. Like, you're not, like, sitting at a desk, like, typing in Salesforce. Like, that's horrible. And that's a thing. Like, I, that was, those were few and far between, like, the shows that we got booked in during the time we were broken up, but like, to every day to go in and this thing went south at this person and you have to go in and see them, I can't imagine what that feels like. And I think that's like such a thing to consider. Is it worth it? This is why people literally move to another state after a breakup because the probability of running

into the person on the street is too great. Like, you got to go every day into your job, try to not get fired and be crying in the bathroom all day long. And I don't, and fluorescent lighting is not cute. you're not shown up to work every morning looking cute. Like, what are you going to do? I mean, whatever. Let's just dress the obvious.

Everybody wants this like Jim and Pam situation, whatever. I, which clearly, if you haven't listened to our episode about Jim and Pam, cue it up. It can happen. It can happen for a lot of people. I thought it had happened for me. Honestly, I mean, this guy after he left, we moved in together pretty much right away. We got engaged at the restaurant where we met.

Aw. We celebrated birthdays. I mean, it was sweet at the time. I don't have any bad feelings about it, but it was this really special place for us. It had brought us together. I know tons of people that have worked for that restaurant group that have gotten married, tons. Yeah. It is a good way to meet people.

It's just you have to. Actually, I were talking about, like, can you, like, be emotionally ready? Like, nobody is emotionally ready for this. Yeah. First of all, I say, don't actively pursue this. Like, find other people. We've said this on another podcast. Right.

Like, date your friends, coworkers, you know. But if it's inevitable, you can't help yourself. There's a super strong connection. You have to do it. You have to be communicative with your partner. and I think the number one thing to do is have that talk of like we're separating business from this relationship and we're walking into the office and we're like becoming our business self. I think when you flirt around your coworkers, it's weird, you make people feel weird.

Like separate it. The vibe when you're in your office should be that no one even could tell you were dating. Yes. You should be extra careful. Extra. Yes. Seriously, because everybody finds out. Everybody does these like grab assy things.

Somebody's going to see you. If it was having learned from my mistakes, if this is a bar. employee relationship, I would pretty much try to avoid this at all cost because one of you is, one of you is leaving the company. Right. Yeah, one of you's got to go. So how important is, like, is your job to you? We got a few people ask, like, how do I go about this? I want to do this. I want to pursue this person that I like at work and we spend all this time together. I mean, essentially that was kind of like the girl's email. This is a time when I would advise that you don't act boldly. I think that in a lot of cases, we're like, tell somebody how you feel,

go up to somebody, do these things. Like, this is the exact opposite. Picture a scenario in which you reveal your feelings for your co-worker that you've been, like, harboring and they don't return them, and then it's awkward till the end of time. I think the move, whether you're male or female, and you're considering telling somebody, I think the move is to, like, ask them to hang out outside of work,

and I think their response will, like, tell you exactly what you need to know. Like, you might be out with coworkers, you're doing drinks, you're doing all these things, like suggest an activity that the two of you do that doesn't involve other coworkers, and it's a totally non-work related. And if they jump at it, I think you'll have your answer. they're weird about it, let it go. Right.

And you can also, it's super easy to just fall back on like you, you're hanging out with the coworker and you say like, oh, you want to get a drink after work. Like, if they say no, they're not in you. They're not embarrassed to you. Yeah. But you can also just be like, okay, well, I was sitting next to this person. It's not weird that I asked them what they're doing after work. Right.

You don't have to feel embarrassed. It's plausible deniability. I wasn't trying to date you. I'm just at work. I just want to see what's up afterward. Yeah. I'm thirsty. Right.

I'm thirsty for alcohol, not thirsty in life. But I totally. I love what you said about this. Like, this is the one situation. Like, do not be bold because, like, you just don't know. And you can hang out in group settings. You can ask them to hang out one-on-one, see how it feels. But, like, you don't need to out and out be like, I like you.

I like you. Yeah. And then you're just, like, the worst awkward scenario until the end of time. Right. So do you think, I guess it's like a loaded question, like, whether this is a good idea or bad. I guess it also, I think just so much depends on, like, what your work environment is like, and you know your work environment.

Like, I worked at Groupon. We partied together all the time. we drank together all the time from the director of operations into the lowest wrong person. If you hooked up with somebody, it was like, no big deal. Everybody thought it was funny. It was like, it was like nothing, you know? It sounds like, I remember I had friends that worked a group on in the early. The glory days, it just sounded like such a fun environment.

We're like, yeah, that was like totally cool. Yeah, I was there for three years. Like, if you hooked up with somebody, like the director of operations was probably like to chat and you making fun of you about it. Like, you were definitely not getting fired for it. But after that, I worked at Amazon for a year. that was my last job. And like it was just such a corporate environment to the point of even like socializing was not encouraged. Oh wow. Like you wouldn't in a year there I think I probably went to

one after work team drinks thing once in a year. Group on was like every single day. Like we were playing beer pong in the office. Yeah. Amazon was just it wasn't like a thing that you did. I would never have like approached this. It would not have been okay. I wouldn't have enjoyed it. It just, I just wouldn't have done it. I have a date this week with a guy that works at Amazon. And I was asking you if I, like, have packages to send back, I can just, like, give them to them? Like, can you take these back for me? What better God? Like, packages sit at my door.

I'm like, babe, can you grab this in the work? On the way out, take him. He's like, I don't work in the warehouse. I'm like, just get, you just take them to work. You'll probably buy a fulfillment center. Just go. Babe, I got to return this girl in iron. Can you just take it to work with you?

He's like, I don't do this. This is not what I do. He seems cool. Well, I'm excited to see how those goes. Okay, I just, he's too funny? He, his dating app, that's where I came from. So his profile, I've showed it to you. It is so funny.

It's very dark and sarcastic, which is just what I need in a person. And if he's not like that in real life, I'm going to feel catfish by it. You should. You were definitely catfish. Who wrote this profile? He's going to deny you. You look exactly like the pictures, but you are not this person. John Mullaney is just out here, like, writing this guy's Tinder bio.

I'm telling you, that's a thing. What if you get there and it's, like, John Mullaney? Right. What if he just made up a fake name and fake job? What if it is? No, he, like, best rival I've ever seen, laughed out loud. All three hinge prompts, because it was on hinge. And, I mean, we're supposed to go out this weekend. So if he doesn't live up to his profile, fucking pissed.

I think that this is your guy. I think he's very funny. He's in a big fur coat in one of the photos. It's terrible. I think he's a sociopath, but I'm into it. Nobody that funny is not a sociopath. And like he's like into fashion. He's, whatever.

He's fucking terrible already. Hate him by Sunday. You know we will. What day you're going to do with him? Friday. Oh, we'll definitely hate him by Sunday. That's my joke. I always, every time Ashley tells me she likes somebody, well, I hand him by Sunday. I like, don't worry. You'll hand him by Sunday. You'll hand it by Sunday. Like, stop being so negative. Sunday rolls around. Sometimes they jump the gun. She hates them by, like, Friday afternoon. She's gone on like a day date with them and already hates them. Oh, my God. What are we talking about? Whatever. Enough about me. Okay, so I think like best case scenario works out. It's a great place to meet people. You do. Jim and Pam, blah, blah, blah. Yeah, get married. There are people this happen.

for it. It does happen. It almost happened to me. Right. And then he laughed me. Don't laugh at my jokes. Let the record show. Ashley's laughing. But I do think it's a really fun way to meet people. I wouldn't say, like, don't do that. I would just say, feel it out. But okay, let me ask you, what do you do when this, and a lot of situations go south? Go to therapy? I don't fucking know. Like, this is a nightmare. I mean, I guess, I don't know. I don't know how real jobs work, you guys. But, like, is there scenarios where you can, like asked to be switched to like a different area, different division, like whatever it is to kind of be separated more from the person. I mean, I think you need to become very good at compartmentalizing,

like turning it off and turning it on like when you're at war. I hate to say like don't show your feelings, but I think that's like a major thing that you need to be good at if you're going to date somebody in the workplace. Or like hopefully there's like a lot of conference rooms. You can just rent one, not sit in the pit with everybody. Never sit. Never sit. What are these words? I don't know. I don't know. I mean, what do you think? I mean, hopefully, I would just, I'm, again, I'm really, instant gratification is my favorite thing in the entire world. It's how I've made all my best and worst decisions. I just, when I decide I'm going to do something. Hey, you want to do this podcast? Yep. That was it. It's all it took. Literally. When I decided I want to eat a pizza or fuck a coworker, I just do it.

I think that's why I'm so successful in a lot of ways. That's right. Tips to success by Raina Greenberg. Just do it. Nike. Colin Kaepernick over here. I have so many good Colin Kaepernack, me used to show you when this wraps. Like when I decided I want to start a podcast, I make a list of every single thing I need to do to make it the best podcast on earth

and I just do it tomorrow. Like that's why I'm going to think. So what did your list say when you wanted to fuck your coworker? What was that list? Just do it. I'm a negative. It was just a little bit of top.

That was the list. Yeah, I started wearing really slutty stuff to work and like bending over in front of him or like lingering at work while he, was still there. Stop giving away tips to fuck your co-workers. I would, like, sit in my office with, like, not that much clothing on because I just, like, knew he was showing up for his shift in, like, 20 minutes, like, oops, I ex.

And I stayed, like, five hours longer to, like, see you walk in the door. You're, like, meet you in the walk-in. Oh, he's, like, walking on him accidentally changing in the locker rooms, whatever, okay? Okay, Donald Trump. I'm going to get sued for the Me Too movement. Okay, you can't, the statute of limitations is up on this. You can't sue me, motherfucker, so. Ha, ha, ha, ha.

Couldn't even keep up. That was a solid rant right there. What are we talking about? Oh, my God. Okay. What do we talking about? Oh, if it goes south. I would, honestly, I would walk into this, just saying to yourself, like, prepare yourself,

can I afford to lose this job? Like, is it a big enough, like, Group on at Amazon, the two companies I referenced, have, they have a hundred divisions. You can just go do something else. You don't have to be in front of the person all the time. Right. Like, you can transfer into a million other roles. Right.

Is it a really small company or like a really small restaurant? You're going to be in front of this person every day. honestly I wouldn't fucking do it. I wouldn't do it. And that's the thing. I mean, again, if you absolutely have to really, like, this is my person, I can feel it, you know, whatever it is, like, I wouldn't seek it out. And I'll tell you, my friend who I spoke to, because I had to, of course, ask her thoughts

on this because she has been in a long-term relationship and they met at work. And when they were going through stuff, she said it was bad. I mean, she has some horror stories of like, A, the sneaking around, but B, just like when they were off. Like, it was real bad and it was really hard on her. And they're in a relationship today. she still would not recommend it. I mean, she recommends of her because that's how they met and she loves this person,

but she is like, 10 out of 10, do not recommend. Also, different ages. Like, I'm thinking, like, when I worked in restaurants, I was just much younger. And so, like, I was like, ah, the effect this is going to have on my life is much less. I can find another job 20. I was 24 at the time. Right. Right.

You know, like, I don't know. I would think about it a little more, I think, you know, just as I'm older, like, the consequences are higher. Yeah. And I will say this, that, I mean, when I have been going through breakups in hard times, I work harder because I'm like I take my to take your mind off of it like I can't imagine a scenario which I'm like I'm just going to throw myself into work and then he's at work every day right there it's honestly my nightmare and you know the dream of like when you run into your axe you just

look like super fly it's like you got to do you got to look like every fucking day in fluorescent lighting eating a kale salad with lettuce in your teeth what every single day you're going to walk into the office do not recommend do not recommend like you got a show for the runway show every single day. Can you imagine? Do you know how shitty I look every day on a daily basis? Like I need NASA to engineer my face and my hair before I see an accident. Right. Every day I got to do that?

Can't imagine. Fuck that shit. Hell on earth. So guys, yeah, you're welcome. Fuck your coworkers or don't. I don't know. Fuck your friends, co-workers. We can't say it enough.

Great advice. Go out to happy hour with those friends, with their coworkers, you know. If you see a guy at your job that you're like, this guy's great. introduce him your friend. Yeah. And ask her to return the favor. And you know what? When you date your friend's coworkers,

if the coworker does something not nice to you, then they have to see your friend every day. Yes. She'll feel shitty about it. I love that. Then their life sucks. Oh, I love this. Yes.

Yes, girl. All right. You feel good? Yes, I feel good. Okay, guys, wrapping it up on dating in the workplace, but the episode's on over. Like we mentioned,

we are heading over to Betches. I'm really excited. We had Jared Fried on our podcast. Before you guys loved him, we loved him. So we're going to run over there. And play, Is This Weird? Cue the music.

All right, you guys, I am super excited for a special edition of the game today. We are playing Is This Weird with very special guests, Jared Freed and Jordana Abraham? Yes, that's correct. From You Up Podcast. Thanks for having us. Thank you for being on the show. We're here at Betches. I love your office.

Oh, thank you. It's fun. It's very Jared. All the pink. Jared is a bench. I'm going to. I'm an unofficial, what would we, a bech ambassador. Yes.

A be a liaison. Yeah, I like that. It sounds more fancy that way. But no, we're happy to be on your show. Let's play the game, right? Yes. So this is. Is Jared in charge of our show?

Yeah. Jared runs all shows. I'm just trying to help you guys out. Jared started podcasts. You guys looked at me like, okay. You're up. What else are you going to say? I don't know.

So this show started with like a really ridiculous email that someone wrote in about her boyfriend that bathed in the morning, like got up and took a bath. Wow. That's a good one. She was like, I would be putting on my mascara and he would be in there with a half chub in the bath. A bath in general. Bath is a morning bath.

Morning bath. It's different than the night bath. Now listen, are you guys bath? Who's taking baths? I don't bathe in my life. I like baths. Every hotel. I don't take one in my New York City apartment.

If I had like a real home that I owned, I think I would take a bath in it. But I'm not taking a bath in an apartment that someone has. spin it in before me. Right. But if I'm at a hotel, I will make them change rooms for me, like, seven times until I find the tub that I like. I'm naked within four minutes with a bottle of wine. I agree. Hotel is a great bath. You're hitting the tub every hotel you're at. Yes. I just stayed at a red roof and plus, and I am not using that bath. You're like, the only reason I'm using that bath is to murder someone that I... Murder myself. Burry myself in ice. We were in Vegas at the pool, and Rainer was like, do you mind if...

I just kind of like call this, like, call it and I can go take a bath. Like, that's all. She wanted to do it in Vegas. Oh, yeah, thirst trap in my Instagram stories. You can be the red of pretending you're somewhere else. People don't know. Yeah, I'll know. My penis will know. From the bacteria.

I love bats. They're kind of disgusting, though. So, like, in theory, like, they're very, like, photogenic, but I feel like they're also kind of gross. So you kind of have to do it and just not think about that. Are you showering? Yeah, you're in a pool of your own film. Right. Especially when it's, like, in a hotel.

I'm like, I don't, someone else has been here. I'm just not going to think about it. Are you showering after the bath? Yes, always. Always. Because I'm skeved out by, like, there's always, like, a pub in a hotel bath, like, one pub that scares me. Which, why are you weirded up by pubs, Raina?

I just, I don't have a lot of pubs. I don't, like, looking at other people's pub. No, the earlier, she went into the bathroom and she said, I'm always weird out when I see a pub on the toilet seat because who has pubs anymore, you know? Jared thinks that the Bush is back. I think we know, we know. Yeah, Bush is back. We've gotten off track.

I'm a bib guy. B.I. The bath email is what started the whole thing. The girl wrote, she wrote, is this weird? And we, like, latched on. Sure. And we were, like, that's a funny term, new game alert, is this weird. Okay.

So the bath is weird. We've established, but here's our first, actually. And you pulled four emails from the past month. And it's not a male thing. But if you're a girl, I think to read in the bath. You read in the bath? Do you wake up and take a bath here? No, that's fucking weird.

The halftop is weird, too, to me. No, it's sexual. Hats are sexual no matter what. If you're in a bath, it's warm water. It's like you're in a vagina. You know, it's like that. is like, for me. Is that what it's like to have sex with the woman, taking a bath?

It's throwing your penis. It's just like dipping your penis into a bath. That's what I'm going to start calling sex from now on. Can I dip myself into your bath? All right. Here we go. That sounds awful. First email.

You guys got a bonus email. Jared, this one's kind of especially for you. Okay. I've been seeing this guy for a while and I really like him, all caps. We've had sex a couple times before school got out, but we've been separated for the summers. We've been sexting a lot about the things we want to do to one another when we get back to school to build up anticipation. In the midst of this, he told me that he wants me to give him a foot job. Like use my... This made you think of me.

Foot jobs. Jared, free. Let me do it. Okay. Like, use my feet to jack him off. My feet. Is this weird? I'm willing to do it because I like him and want to make him happy. But is this the thing guys like? Have you guys done this? Let me know. Is this weird? I think I've heard of this. You know why I think of Jared right here. You know why we think of Jared's screaming. in my dreams. There's a shoe for every foot. I hear him screaming about it. Everybody's everyone's got, there are people

masturbating to foot feet. Yes. This is your someone's foot. Now you know why we chose a shoe. Sure, I get it. Okay, foot jobs. Have you guys ever done it? Let's pull the women in the room. No. I have not. I don't know if I would know how. Yeah. It's, I feel like some people can peel bananas with their feet. You know, I feel like they would do a good job.

Do you have to be like... Fit nicely between the heels of your feet, a penis. Yeah, I guess. My feet are huge, so I don't know. Imagine having like the same range though and like how can we have to move them together. It feels like a. I feel like I can easily do this. Like this feels like it should be a new group fitness class. Yeah. Sure. Right.

Just all you do is foot jobs. And they just have dildos out and everyone, all these girls are like just foot jobbing. What do you charge for class? $35. $35 is the new trend in New York City. Can you see that though? I can. It's not that far away from some of the fitness costs.

But like you kind of get the side abs, get your obliques, work. You just go from dildo to dildo right to left. Yes, Is it a thing, though? Yes, it's crunches. Do you know any guys who've gotten, have you ever gotten one? I've been deep into the porno recesses of the world, and there's a lot of foot job porn. Like, this isn't a surprise to me.

Yeah, yeah, yeah, this is like out there. Like, foot job is out there as a, like, it's not like you find one. Like, there's enough out there to know that many men are into this. Okay. So that means he's into. feet. That means he has, he's absolutely masturbating to footjob porn. Like, there's no question. It's not weird. Would you, uh, would you let a girl if she wanted to give you a footjob? Absolutely. Are you kidding me? I'd be like socks on, socks off, whatever you're looking to do.

Because to me, if you're into it, I'm into it. Okay. Like, I live in that world. So if you're into it, I'll try anything once. You know, anything. I like kind of, I think I'm going to, I think I'm going to do it. You're going to do it? Yeah. I mean, I want you guys to do it to guys that are like, okay. Like, I think that'd be funny. Like, I would want to see, see, the thing is, like, the internet, before the internet,

I don't think we knew what we were into. Like, I think, like, our, whoever was our ages when the internet didn't exist, we just didn't know what the bounds of our sexuality were. Yeah. Right. So, like, now you click on a thing and you're like, oh, wow, my penis moves to this foot job thing. like I didn't even know.

Do you need a pedicure for it, though? What's that? Do your feet need to look cute? Do you need a pedicure for the foot job? I would imagine if this guy's in the feet, like, he's got to, I'd imagine he has a type of foot in the same way that I have a type of woman. What if the foot smelled? Would you mind?

We're all getting in the shower after anything. It's bad. Anything goes. That's true. It's just, and here's the thing to that girl. If you do this foot job for him, he ain't going anywhere. he's got to find a whole new fucking person. It's a new way to trap a man.

If you trap a man. Pregnacy is out. He's in for life. Foot jobs are. Right? Don't you think? What you do with a guy? If your boyfriend asked you, he was like, listen, I got to tell you, we're

whatever months in year in. Assuming that was his thing, I think if it wasn't his thing, then I'd just be like the girl he convinced to have. I just don't mind it because it's like, you would feel tricked? It's so much. It's no. It's no big deal. It's like way easier than a blowjob.

Right. Least egregious of all fetishes. I can like watch TV and. and give a foot job. I just don't get the appeal. I just feel like it's... We have to stop wondering about the appeal. Like, I don't...

Just accept it. Just accept that appeals to him. I have a deep-seated desire to understand why everybody is the way that they are. My mom's a psychiatrist. So, like, I need to know, like, what happened in his childhood to, like, want the foot on his cock.

Yeah. I gotta know. Like, in high school, some girl just, like, kicked him or some shit, and then all of a sudden, he's like, wow, I'm hard. Right. Or like his mom would never take him out to lunch because she was always at the pedicure.

Or she used to take him to pedicure places and he was just surrounded by beautiful feet. And that was the first time he like got hard. Yeah. I don't know. I don't think the why is important. To me the why isn't important because if we, everything to me is like on a spectrum, you know, of like sexual. Like this guy. And for me, she's like I like him.

We're doing really well. We're getting into it to go. going to the new school year. Most guys are trying to work themselves out of relationships for the new school year. She has the opposite problem. Right. Yeah, she's lucky. This guy, you're one of the lucky ones.

This guy will be fucking looking at her foot at every frat party, just wondering when they can go home together. Right. He can't end it because then she's just going to, you know, tell everyone. Well, she'll tell everyone, but I mean, at this point, I don't think he's that worried about it. I don't know if I'd mind being foot job girl. This is not a weird fetish to me. Like, that's not a big deal. They're weird.

Okay, guys. But you said, like, even as, like, is the alternative blowing? Right. I'll take a foot job. It's a lot of work. The cleanup is really, just finding the cum to clean up is really the only issue. Right. And then you're exfoliating, you know?

Yeah, exactly. Now you've got an Offie Coleman situation. All right, guys. Next email. Move along. Offie coming. I had to get that. That was good.

Thank you. So won this for April. Yeah. Get ready for Passover with. They all be coming. That would be great. A whole room full of Jews. Do you feel out out?

Yeah, I didn't know what you guys were talking about, but I was laughing anyway. Oh, you know. We'll Google it afterwards. Well, I'll tell you on the way to the studio later. Okay. Next email. Before I started dating my ex, I scrolled through the people who was following on Instagram, and I noticed a pattern.

He's on private, by the way. But he follows a lot of big booty twerking pages, sex and muscles, and the pages are literally big, big butts, all caps, twerking girls who are extremely buff in provocative outfits. plus large black girls shaking their asses. I understand you can follow these pages low-key, but to be following them openly on all these pages is this. And I'm just going to assume she's a skinny white girl.

Like I'm just going to assume she's like the opposite of this thing that he likes. In your mind, she's me. Or any of us in this room. I'm assuming that's like so different than what she is. That's why it's like a little. It's from several different pages. She said a whole bunch of different pages. I'm curious what you think is a man.

I'm curious what you would think if your boyfriend was following all these pages. Right. I think we've had this discussion before. I think if you want to go to those pages and like them in your head, that's totally fine. I don't really understand the need to press, to double tap. Like, who is that for? Like, are you supporting, like, the arts? Like, why not just, like, I feel like people, it's like watching porn. Like, I don't mind if my boyfriend watches porn. I don't want to, like, I don't want to, like, hear about it. It's not bookmarked on his most recent stuff. Right. Or it's not my friends can't see it in their newsbeads that all the stuff they're liking. I think it's fine to like, I don't mind anyone like looking and liking whatever they want. I think the public follow and like is like a little bit unnecessary for me. Like you go through this guy's follows and it's just like all ass, ass, ass, ass.

Right. There has to be. Like come up with a private account for that. I agree with Jordana. I agree with you because there has, but there also has to be a grace period. this guy went from nobody's watching him to now one very specific person is watching every fucking thing he does and all her friends

and all her friends most important yeah so like he might have been single and then they're dating then they get more serious and then he's like he also brings the baggage of his Instagram follows so he needs to be allowed that's his family that's his family he but I feel for him he's a long-term relationships he's been in longer than with her. Yeah, exactly.

You're exactly right. He has a longer standing relationship with some of these Instagram. Listen, I follow this Instagram model and she got married recently and I was like, fuck it, I'm out. I've been here too long. I've seen the wedding.

Now I'm looking at the wedding. I'm like, oh, she went with that dress. You've gone to fun. Yeah, you're just, I'm in it too much. And it's like, I can't even masturbate to this girl anymore. You know, like, it's like, oh, you ruined everything with a real life.

For sure. You'll come back after the divorce. Hopefully. Yeah, just wait it out. You'll be fine. But I think there was something else I was thinking about. Just like I follow these. If you went through my follows, a girl would be like,

what the fuck is going on here? And I'm like, yeah, I'm an animal. I'm sorry. I'd be like they're comedians. We're co-workers. We're co-workers. Yeah, they're comedians with the nicest asses you've ever seen. You know, like I, I, and it's also like this guy probably doesn't realize how many he follows.

Right. You know, it's just a buildup over time. Right. Right. So. Like how long's he at Insta? Even if it's different from you, I don't think it's that weird because also like we all go to a place for fantasy. Right.

That's probably her main question. It's that insecurity of like, I look nothing like this and this is all he's into, sex and muscles and twerking. And, you know, do you think that's anything a girl should ever worry about? I don't know. I mean, I guess you should be a little worried if it's like way off, right? Yeah. I think. But also, I do believe in fantasy.

Like, you go, no, you're not looking at the porn that you're with. And we have, the problem is some of these Instagram accounts call themselves fitness models, or they call themselves influencers. And it's like, no, it's softcore porn. For sure. And which is okay. But softcore porn, like, doesn't exist anymore. It's on Instagram.

I just don't want someone to be obsessed with anything. I don't want somebody to, like, need a billion of anything. I feel like maybe you unfollow a couple of them when you get a girlfriend. I think it's okay to have the conversation. I think it's okay to go. Like what Jordana's saying, I completely, like, there has to be a level of class

to your follow. Right, be a little self-aware. Or have a secret account, what's your porn? I'd rather not the secret account. I'd rather like, I'd rather, I'd rather him be like... Finding that would be crazy. Yeah, that is weird. Well, it's like you're curated porn in your pocket.

Right. It's like having your bookmark on your private laptop. Well, that's more my point. Like, the search, like, you can search these public... These accounts are public. Right, right. There's no need to follow. There's no need to like.

You can go and start. search these out on your own. You know the names. You can go find them. Like, you can be with someone and be classy about what you, like, I was thinking about this the other day. You ever get to that level in the, like, I don't know if this happens to women as much as men. If I get a certain point in a relationship,

I'll start telling a story about a past relationship to the girl I'm, like, currently seeing. And I'll get, like, midway through the story, and I'll be like, oh, this isn't funny to you at all. Right. You don't want to hear that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, I'll see her face. I'll be like, this is

part where guys usually laugh. And I'm like, I'm friends with this girl as much as we're like hooking up. And I'm going, oh, this wasn't the story for you. Oh, God. No one wants to hear a pleasant story with about someone's, someone, someone used to date that they're currently dating. Exactly. The only stories you want to hear are like some time they were like a complete lunatic. Yes. And it makes you look much better. Yeah, yeah. And what I realized midway through these stories, I'm like, oh, this wasn't the story for the girl I'm hooking up with. I needed this. I needed her. The end, the only way you can save it is, is with this girl dying in a fire.

Right. So we go with that. But this is kind of the same with these Instagram accounts. Like you're following them and you go, oh, yeah, you're right. You know, I follow them because they died in a fire. That's why I followed. Well, I've definitely heard about guys, they get in a serious relationship and they clean up their follows a little. Like one of my best.

Yeah. Like one of my best guy friends was like the second, now he's with this now serious girlfriend. He was like, I went through and like got rid of the booty and like all the things. That's a good move. I think that's worth. Because if you want to find it, yeah, go look for it. I think it's worth the conversation, right? Like if she said to him, like, listen, you follow so many big booty muscle-bound warriors,

and I can't see that. Right. I have to, the Amazonian page you follow is crushing myself. It's like we all need a little shame in our relationship. It's okay to feel a little shame about, like, things that could embarrass someone else. We don't want to have a totally shameless relationship where we're all doing exactly what we want to do at every moment. That's only for single animals. So I do think, like, you have that conversation.

Also, what you're saying with the shame thing is, like, you guys are now together. Like, the friends are looking at the account. Hey, my friends see that stuff. Right, right. You're a reflection of me. I don't care what you're looking at. I think it's, but the less important thing to me is that he's going to this far off land of masturbation that has nothing to do with her. Right.

I don't think it's so insidious. So not so weird, but worth a combo. Yeah. Okay. All right, for sure. Next email. I had been casually dating this firefighter. We had flirted a lot and made out a few times at parties, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.

Okay, whatever. They went out and she said, let me know when you get home safely, trying to be cute and coy. Well, not only did he let me know he got home safely, but he sent me pictures to let me know he did. Three, to be exact, of his long, skinny anaconda dick. I got Dick from the left, dick from the right angle, Dick laying on his stomach. Seriously, I wonder if he fucking had a dick photo shoot when he got home. Is this weird since one, the dick picks came out of nowhere? and in excess, and two, because he had a full-blown photo shoot.

Wait, is this a first date? Yeah, how long have they, have they had sex? Oh, yeah, they made out a few times. This was, like, their first date. One night, one night we met it for drinks, and that's what, I mean, like. So they meet him for drinks, she says, let me know you got home safe. And he got home. And he's like, the penis is safe.

It's here. Just want to let you know. It's like when the babysitter sends the parents' pictures of the baby playing. Yeah. Like, he's doing okay. Yeah, yeah. There's blocks next to his penis. She misses you, but she's doing okay.

A bunch of Legos on his stomach. I think that just gives you a very clear indication into what this guy is looking for. He's just, he's looking to have sex. Yeah. So if you're into that, that's cool. If you're looking for like a deeper... I mean, you guys did an episode on Dickpicks, which, you talked about it. Like, it's so fascinating to me.

Do you send unsolicited dick pics to girls? I don't. Anyone I've sent dickpicks to, they've been, I was pretty much new. They were solicited. They were solicited. They were wanted. And I liked sending them. It was fun to send.

Did you do the different angles like she mentioned? Well, you got to chub up. I mean, if you think you're getting, you're getting, if you think you guys are getting the real penis. Do you face tune it? I am face tuning with my hand so fucking hard on these penis pictures. You don't understand. You face tune them?

Well, I'm talking about, like, I'm doing the physical face-tick. I'm taking my hand. I thought you meant like the digital, like, photo shop. Yeah, I'm putting a nice sepia tone on it. I give it a tan. You can't do it in front of a brick wall because, you know, if you try to face you in front of a brick wall, you can tell because the lines on the bricks.

So if you ever going to send a dick pick. This is a pro tip, if I've ever heard one. Raina comes in with like, I am telling you. A dick pic photo shoot in front of a brick wall, like a fashion blogger. You're already? What's doing with a dick? I don't know. I have a friend.

He's in So-o. on the street. I have a friend. This is the funniest thing. I don't know. I don't want to tell it. I'll just say a friend of mine. Has a dick. Is it starting about you? It's about a friend. It's not about me. I'm not even lying. But it is the funniest fucking thing. He has a picture and it's the outline of his penis in his pants. And he sends it to girls and it's huge. Is it his? It's real. No. It's like a water bottle. But it looks so much like a penis. I would like that. And it works. Because, you know, the, the thought in your mind. What? the illusion becomes the reality. Yeah. And he's like, no, I get a fucking, you know, small dick. And I go show up and they're like, let me see that hog.

And it's like, because he has this, but it's like it's literally in his saved albums. Oh, yeah, you got to like mass out. But then it's, I love a dick outline. I've said this before since episode one on our show. Like, I love to see like a guy's dick through his pants a little bit. But you must love Lulu Lemon shorts. Love him. But that guy could be like, he can be like, I didn't love it.

lie to you. I never said it wasn't a water bottle. I wonder what water bottle is optimal. Just check out. Just sani. Pullen Springs is a nice size for a day hour. That's like a girl who wears like a bra with a lot of paddage. Absolutely. Right. Yeah. She's not a lot. She's not saying. I'm sure.

This is just, you know, this is sexy. But it's so funny to me that he's. Can I get that pick? I mean, just if you feel like sending it to me. I'll tell you who you can find it from after we're done. But I do think what we're doing is you want to get to a point where it's not hard, but not, but it looks like you didn't do anything to it. Unsolicited dick pick. I'm saying I don't want it. This guy probably just wants to fuck. Is that what you're saying? What Jordana said is absolutely correct. He's letting, he's letting her know his intentions. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, his intentions are clear. He's not taking it to the cotillion.

The firefighter's ball. He's not taking the firefighters ball. He's going to, and what guys do why they do that is you're throwing Hail Marys. It's the same reason guys, cats, call. It worked for somebody. One time. Maybe she's into it. And that's the thing. That's her right, too. She could look at it and go, hey, I want to fuck too. Good for you. But don't expect this guy to all of a sudden be like, you know, ready to go with you on a trip. Sure. Right. Okay.

All right. Let's hear about. She found her first Insta story. You sent it to her. Couples Insta story. This is me and my new guy. Blocks O'Hulahan. I can do an album, too. Yeah, exactly. Dave from the left, right and center. Chief cock and balls. All right, one more email.

This is interesting to me. It made me feel a little squirmay. Okay. I was on a second date with a guy. We got on the topic of some name we both thought was funny. He then proceeds to pull out his phone and show me the notes on his phone of potential future baby names he has picked out. I just went along with it, and he asked me a name I liked,

so I said one. goes, oh, I like it, I'll add it to my list. Is this weird? Is the question, is it weird that he said he would add it to his own list? I think the list is weird that, like, somebody who is not in, like, a long term or any kind of relationship has, like, a note on their phone of potential baby names for their baby with a person that doesn't exist yet. I don't think that's weird.

You don't think it's weird? I don't think that's weird. Why not? I'm constantly thinking of baby names. If you were in a relationship, now? No, not. I know. Like, I have baby names picked out.

I don't even want a kid. These names don't involve my boyfriend. friend. Like, they're just, they're my names. Are you going to forget them? Do you need them in a note on your phone? I don't have one, but I could see a situation where I'd be like, oh, that's a great name. Let me write that down, because, like, I really like that name, especially.

I mean, if the name is, like, John and Harry and Tom, like, no, but if the name is, like, something kind of, like, cool or weird. Magnus. Yeah, if that was a name that I was into. Shayla? That's the name from Sex and City. Shela. Oh, yeah. I know. She stole her baby name. She stole my name. I remember that. I would find it very weird. I'm really not into a guy that, like, is not in a relationship and is just walking around with, like, imaginary baby names.

This guy wants to, like, I feel like this is, like, just a psychotic wants to get married and settle down, dude, right? I think you could just, like, I think you could just, like, like, names, no? You don't you have a name in mind for any child of yours? Here's the thing. I have opinions on names. You have thoughts. I have thoughts on names, but I'm not writing down, like, names like their restaurants I want to go to in the city. Like, I'm not, I, here's, I think it's more, just.

women never give... Women never give... It's not about her, though. I don't think it's about, like, her. He's not writing down the names for this girl. He's writing the names for himself and whoever... Well, I actually think it's for her. You think it's what?

Here's my theory. And I'm sorry, women don't think that guys are as maniacal as them. Okay. Actually, I do. This is actually a maniacal move to me. I think that he is showing her this to say, look at, I'm a serious prospect.

I think about babies. And then she'll look at it and go, well, he's thinking about babies, thinking about relationship. He wants to be serious. And then she'll fuck him. And this is like his way, his game. I see. Do you know what I mean?

He's baby name, note guy. Like, that's his game. That's his kind of, that's his way of his move of being like, hey, I, it's like when guys say I want to meet your parents on the third date. Right. Like, they're just painting them, like, you talk with like, emotional masturbation. The emotional masturbation. They're playing into the emotional masturbation.

Can there be something nice about this, though, like that he wants to show you that he is a serious guy about... There's only two options to me. One, he's a fucking crazy person who writes down baby names. That's fucking weird. Or two, he's a person that writes down baby names so he can fuck chicks. That's weird too. What if you were dating a girl and she had a baby name

document? I hate to make this like a male-female thing, but to me I'd be like, it would be, if I was to play red flag deal breaker on that, to me it would be a deal breaker because I'm not ready to even be talking about that. I just keep it. It's like a private thing. It's like your

It's like your diary. I just think keep it private. It's like following the girls on Instagram from the last email. I just think it's private. You can have the names. That's what's weird about it. But how many names could a girl be wanting? Like to me, there's like if I, like you said, have you ever thought of baby names?

I have opinions on all the names, but I don't need to write those notes down. Like if a girl is like, I love these names, I would think that they were like three of them. How many are? Yeah. How many are on? list. That's another question. Yeah. Like you have 20 names that you couldn't remember. You've got to have a whole fucking notes category for it. Remember

those names? Those are going to be your kids' names. This is going to be kids. All right. You can't remember olive? Okay. So it's weird. It's weird to me. But he could be a total like psychopath manipulator also. The manipulation point to me like that's the first thing I

think of because I'm like, what dude would do this only to not fuck? So have fun finding out, girl. I'm I'm in agreement. Okay. So we're going to wrap up you guys. We are so excited. We did this with you. Yes. So much fun. We want to plug all your things. So first and foremost, obviously we can find you on You Up, which is an amazing podcast. Thank you. Weekly podcast. You Up Podcast. It is weekly. It comes at every Wednesday at 5. Betches.com slash you up. Or really any place you listen to podcasts. Great way to listen to both of our podcasts. If you guys don't, do you guys know, laughable?

Laffable, you can look up any podcast and then follow podcasters. Okay. So it's a great way to love, you know, to find episodes. that you've been on ours because we're going to do, we're going to tape a segment. Oh, it's almost like IMDB a little bit? Like kind of for podcasts. So if you guys, we can listen to us on yours, yours, on ours. It's a real good way for everyone to jerk each other off podcast. Yeah, total orgy.

So total orgy. So that's a good way to find everything. But you have podcasts every Wednesday of five. It's a come on. And obviously you guys are all following batches. We know you are. We don't need to tell you that. But thank you guys so much.

Thanks for having us. Thanks for having us. And our stuff. Yeah, we're here. Yeah. I'll follow us. as we all, Girls Got Eat Podcast on Instagram. We're on Facebook, Twitter,

Girls Got Eat Podcast.com for our show dates and our store and all those things. You guys got cool shirts too. I like the shirt. Thank you so much. Shirts, shows, all the things, Raina. I'll shame everybody. Yeah, I shame them up top at the beginning of the episode. Okay, perfect. So we're all said.

Just go to our website, girls got to eat. Shop for the merchandise. Jared loves it. It's cool. It's endorsed by Jared free. That's it. That's it. Guys.

Have a great week. Thanks, guys. Bye.