Girls Gotta Eat - So You Got Blindsided...

Episode Date: October 1, 2018

Out-of-the-blue breakups, ghosting, exes resurfacing just to disappear again -- we discuss the situations that leave you wondering WHAT THE FUCK?, and how to work through them. What is closure exactly? Do you really need it? And how can you get it? We also chat about a bet Rayna won and Ashley's recent dating hellscape, make some special announcements, and play new themed rounds of Fuck, Marry, Kill. Enjoy! Follow Girls Gotta Eat on Instagram @GirlsGottaEatPodcast, subscribe/rate/review, and check our website for merchandise and upcoming live shows. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

I definitely was able to get feedback in that relationship after our breakup that has helped me. I mean, I would certainly rather the feedback during the relationship than after it. I'm not trying to be out here. You are ready. Oh. I always say hi. Hi, guys. This is how I start every Instagram store I do.

It's how I start every conversation. We usually just say it together. I'm sorry, you're not ready. This is how I start. Okay, we're starting again. We can keep that in. But hi, guys, welcome back. I'm ready.

Okay. Welcome back to another episode. of Girls' Gotta Eat Podcast. Welcome back. And we are coming to you from Mouth Media, powered by Senheiser. And you know we're always here at Mouth Media. We love our studio. And we had such a phenomenal event with these guys last week.

We did an event at Spring Place, which is this beautiful, phenomenal place, like Tribeca Soho area. And we were there with Mouth Media and Bloom. This is a little different, the event we did with them. Other than our comedy show, this is more of sort of like, a panel discussion almost. But thanks again to Mouth Media, Springplace, Bloom, and our special guest with Skylar Bouchard, dining with Skyler.

We'll have that as a bonus episode. You guys can hear the event. But I'm just wanting to shout them out one more time. We have a lot of announcements today. Like in a good way. In a great way. Exciting stuff. We have some live shows coming up.

We have a special Nashville announcement. I'm really excited. Why don't you tell them who's open in the show, Raina? We are, we're bringing our favorite, our favorite person to talk about, my favorite person to talk about, to Nashville with us. So Lev Fur, who was on our show, awesome stand-up comedian, is going to be coming to Nashville with me and Ashley, staying in a house with us. You were going to say that. Stay tuned for updates on what happens in the house in Nashville. But you guys can.

Don't you will stop being polite and start getting real. Start getting naked with Lev. Girls got to eat Nashville. Season one. Oh my God. Yes. He opened the Caroline show. He crushed it.

He's such funny jokes. And, you know, if you guys live in here in New York City or you're lucky enough to see him. But if you are coming to our Nashville show, if you live in Nashville, you're close by, you haven't gotten tickets yet. Get the tickets. They're going fast. See us. And more importantly, see love. On top of that, meet and greets are available for our shows in Chicago, Atlanta and Nashville.

I think they're all $25, right? Yes. So Nashville, there's an option. to just buy the full VIP ticket, but the ticketing's a little interesting. Chicago and Atlanta are sold out. Sorry, we'll be back, but they're sold out, but you can still add the meet and greet, so you can still come hang with us after the show. We had so much fun on our meet and greet in Carolines.

Again, it's just if you already purchased your ticket, you just go back in and buy the meet and greet for $25. And we have gift bags. The Atlanta gift bags, I'm so excited. Can I have one? Yeah, we get, they're going to make additional ones for us? Yeah, yeah. Okay, this is a gift bag I'd want.

Very special gift bags. We're going to have them in short. Chicago, too, and we're just going to hang with you guys. We'll do Instagram stories. We'll get pictures. We'll have someone there taking pictures. Maybe a couple special guests. I've won special guests in particular in Atlanta that'll hang with us after the show. Can we announce it? No, no, no. Okay. You never know with him. Okay. Oh, it's a boy. So, yeah, you guys, again, if you bought tickets to Chicago and Atlanta, you can go back in and buy the meet and greet. We want to meet you, hang with you. And then Nashville still available. Meet us and Love. Can't wait. We'll keep you guys abreast of new New York City and other venues. Typically, I take this time to browbeat everybody into rating and reviewing us, but I'm actually going to let Ashley do a PSA. Oh, I got a PSA, guys. Hit me with it. All right.

I'm going to try to keep this as light as possible. There's a lot going on right now, especially with women, that is frustrating in our current country, political landscape, whatever. I'm not going to go on a full political rant. If you want that, you can find me on Twitter and Instagram. But I just want to tell everybody that voter registration is so important. voting is November. That is midterm elections are so, so important, never been more important. If you're frustrated with anything that's happening right now in our country, this is the time.

This is the one thing you can do. I think people get so caught up in like, what can I do? This is it. So I just, if you're registered to vote, great. You obviously have the date on your calendar, but if you're not registered to vote, the time is, it's approaching. So in New York, it is 25 days prior to election day. So, which is early November 6. November 6. Okay. So 25 days before November 6. which is early October, no matter what you do. And if you're not going to be out of town,

you can do your absentee ballot. When you guys are voting on November 6, we're going to share your cute little voting sticker pictures. We're going to all be in it together. So just please, please make sure you're registered to vote. The time is running out. There's only, like, at this point, I don't even know, like a days left to register to vote if you aren't already.

And support women. Vote for candidates that support women, elect women. Not blindly. Do your research. but I just had to get on my soapbox. We have this forum that we built, and I feel very passionately about a lot of things. But today, it is just, we're voting.

We're all going to vote. We're all going to vote. And whatever your political beliefs are, you should exercise that right. Exactly. We're so lucky to live in a country where we vote our leaders in office and they work for us. So get it done. Or where you can have a podcast and talk about all of your feelings about those things. We have a bonus episode.

Okay. All right. We have some cool merchandise coming out for you guys. We're releasing our fall line. to do a runway show for Ashley in her apartment. A line. You know what, like, actual clothing brands do, like, fall way back in spring. We introduced our fall line in the fall.

In the fall. It's already fall. Can you imagine if I was on top of things enough to actually release our fall line in the spring? But no one buys. We're, like, full Dior. We're doing, like, a runway show in fashion week with our fucking t-shirts. I'm going to put it on your dog and just make him walk around with our sweatshirts. Anyways, we're going to have some sweatshirts.

We're not sure about beanies. Stay tuned about Datings. Forget about it. I don't want to talk about it. I don't want to ruin my mood. Do you remember we used to try to keep these episodes to 45 minutes? Fuck it. Well, we, but you guys asked for this.

This is what you wanted. We started with those 45-minute episodes, and you guys were like, we wish they were twice a week. We wish they were longer. Well, thank Raina. You're welcome, family. And Ross, who broke his dick,

because that was the first long episode. Oh, was it? That episode was so funny that that's when it went over. I fucking, like, just blew past my time limits. And I was like, let it go. Broken Dick Ross broke the camel's back? The dick that broke the camel's back? Can you break a camel's back with your broken dick?

I don't know. Maybe you can like put it between the humps, like a titty fuck. Ross, Ross text us. Let us know. He probably is in like India or something. He's always traveling. Stop giving. Let's not give him anymore our time.

He had plenty. I'm down with him. Speaking of former guests, I have a funny story to tell you what happened last night. What happened last night? We, Ray and I both went out last night. together. It was sad. So I was out with Love last night. And Sunday night.

I've been out with Love a lot this week. Anyways, it was his brother's birthday, so we went out last night. We went to one of my favorite barn. Shout to Mark. We love Love's brother, Mark. Yeah, Leve has an older brother. Yeah, guys. His name is Mark. We hang out with him all the time. He's great. Let's Pimp Mark out. Furt burgers on Insta. Get in there.

Anyways, I was out with Lev. at the Garrett, which is one of my favorite bars. And we're sitting there, we're having drinks, and this girl keeps looking over at us. And I noticed this immediately. And in my mind, I'm like, it's the fan look. It's like she definitely listens to the show. And she's with a guy. She keeps looking at me.

And she keeps looking at me. And she's like smiling and giggling. And I looked at Lev. And I was like, do you see what I'm seeing? And he's like, yeah, that girl's so into me. It took a sip of water. And I was like, love, she's not looking at you. And he wasn't kidding.

And he was like, how much do you want to bet that that girl is looking at me? And I was like, that girl's on a date. You want to bet me that that girl is what, trying to like get her boyfriend to like involve you in a cuck holding situation. It's not that a female that is like a young girl in New York City is looking at me because she listens to my show. It's you. Right.

I'm like, how much you want to bet me? He's like, I don't know, how much you want to bat. And I was like, I will blow you. you in the bathroom. That's how much I'm willing to bet. That's how confident you were, but also kind of would blow it. Also would blow him. What a win-win, right?

That's what I said to him. I was like, I mean, either way, I win. So I look over at the girl and I like make eye contact because I'm going to like ask her what is going on. Right. And she looks over at me and her, the dude comes up and is like, she's been wanting to say hi to you all night. She listens to your show. So shout out to Paige.

Paige is on her first. First date with this guy. He was cute. He had cute glasses. I think that Garrett is a great place for a first date also. But I won the bet and I didn't get to blow love. Set up another one that's better. We talked about maybe it happening in Nashville. Oh, my fucking God. Jesus Christ. We're all staying in like a townhouse together. This should be great. That's a 30 minute intro. I don't care. What are you guys going to do? It's a good episode.

It's a good one. Stay tuned. This is a great story that you're about to tell. Well, this has been happening recently. Guys, I don't need to tell you. Like, I date plenty. But recently what's been happening is that guys have been pursuing me. Pursuing me. They reach out to me. I have nothing to do with this.

Passively living your life. Yes, just living my best life. Beating down your door. I'm serious. They reach out to me. She's not lying. Not line. Ask me out.

I say yes. Sure. Love, yeah, skit drinks, whatever. They disappear. What? Let me just break this down for you guys what's been happening. Multiple men, not like, she's not even like going on the apps and like, she's like hunting down men. Men that have met her in public have been like, have found her to be like, I want to take you out.

And she just did the normal human decency thing of saying yes. And they were like, for that reason, I'm out. One guy, like specifically, DM'd me, heard the podcast, DM'd me. I was like, hey, you know, I know this might seem a little weird. I'm just trying to shoot my shot. I heard you on your podcast. I think you're beautiful. I think you're funny.

I would love to grab drinks if you're up for it. I would bet it him a little bit. He's hot, whatever. Cool. Yeah. We're not giving him any other. No, do not. Also, I love the opening line. Shoot my shot?

It was cute. Sports metaphors? Oh, they make sports. Whatever. We went back and forth a little bit. And I'm like, yeah, I jokingly was like, sure, I'm down to meet you in like a public place with plenty of security around. I mean, we did this whole thing of him being a

Crazy stalker. Cute banter. Agreed to go out with him. Never heard from again. On the internet. I have just been like, it's so, like, we've been laughing hysterically about this. Like, all I do is say yes. What am I supposed to do?

Not say yes to dates? He shot his shot, made the shot, and that's it. It's over. He's just like, that's all I wanted. I just wouldn't know I could date her. Like, none of these guys are trying to, like, at least like helicopter and land on a blowjob? And even try to get it later, try to get a blow job. But I will say.

Wait, you didn't even, the guy who chased you out of a bar to get your phone number. Chaste Ashley out of a bar. Chaste him. The cab, stopped the cab to get her phone number. Yeah, so met him in the wild at a party. I could care less about this fucking guy. He saw me get into Uber and was like, wait, wait, wait, no, I have to ask you out. And we continued to talk for like three weeks every, I'm just out of town like all of

August. I went out of town every single weekend. And he just kept being like, are you around this weekend? Let's get drinks, all this stuff. Finally, I was like, yeah, I'll be back. And then let's get drinks. Never heard from again. But I ran into this guy at a party and he like runs up to me and it's like, I've been texting

with Ashley. I'm going to take her out and she's back. Never heard from him again. But here's the thing. I think that it's, shit comes up, especially with people you mean on date apps. I never take that shit personally because they don't know me. But it happened a few times in date too where a guy set up a date. He's like, we're going out this Saturday.

Never heard from. And I'm like, sure, that sounds great. Never heard from again. It just happened. You guys, I'm not kidding you. You having five times in a month. That's why it was so funny. And just yesterday, a guy that I actually met out, he came around and we were texting and he asked me to get drinks.

He was like, can you get drinks tomorrow? And I would like PTSD of saying yes. I was like, I don't. My whole body tensed up. What did you say yes? And I'm not going to hang out with you. Yes. Like, I can't.

This can't happen a six time. Like I was like, I can't. You don't know what I've been through. Had full blown PTSD of accepting a date. And I want to have like sympathy or be able to give you good advice, but like you didn't do anything wrong. Like, it's one of the scenarios, like, you know, if you could go back and change everything, what would you change? I don't know.

All I did was agree to plans. And I, again, I don't take this stuff personally, especially with people that, like, I don't know. They don't know me. I can't take this personally because, like, they don't know why I am as a person. But it was just so many times back to back that we were like, what are we supposed to do? But that's a good segue into what we're talking about today. When you're left wondering what the fuck when you're actually in a relationship with somebody. Right.

So I feel like your closure. in this situation is just like, I didn't do anything wrong. I'm going to move off my life. But like, what if you actually like went down the road with them a little bit? Yeah. One month or four years, like whatever it is. We get a lot of emails from girls just being like, I don't know how to like come back from this. And I have no closure and I was kind of blindsided.

Should we read an email? Maybe I'll paraphrase the one. Okay. Because it's kind of long. This one just really, I think I was like in my feelings a little bit when this email came through in the first place and I like kind of laid in bed and got upset about it. This again, you guys, we only know the side of the story that you share. We realize there's two sides to every story.

But this girl's story was that she met this guy like on a plane so romantic. They spent where they were on a five hour flight and hit it off. They're both in California. They started dating. So it sounded to me like they dated for a few months. Like they were boyfriend, girlfriend, whatever. She saw a future with them. And her email was great. She's sound like a normal, rational female. She was like, I liked him for this reasons. We got along. We had shared interest.

And basically, I think it was that she was taking a trip. She was going on a trip to like Japan or something. And like the second she got back, and while she was gone, he was saying, I miss you. I can't wait to see when you get back. The second she got back, obviously, it was like, are you going to coming over? I missed you. I just got back from this long trip. And he was like, I'm not coming over and I don't want to see you anymore. And she was totally shocked and she sent us the text. She sent us the text message. I think that's what really got to me because her response to him was, wait, what? Can you? I feel like I'm going to cry. It was can you call me? And I feel like we've all felt that feeling of like, what, what? What? Can we talk about this? What are you doing?

Right. What do you mean? What are you talking about? Right. And you just were telling me that I was in, I was on this great trip. I thought I was coming home and was to see my boyfriend. Like, so while I've been gone, you've been planning to break up with me? Why are you telling me that you wanted to seem? It's very, very frustrating. And it's just one of a million instances that so many females have dealt with. And I think, you know, her emailed us, the subject line, I think, was like, I'm having a hard time getting over this guy. Yeah.

And I think that, like, this is a problem that knows no age. It knows no time frame in a relationship. Like, I'm thinking of times this happened to me when I was 18. I'm thinking of times this happened to me when I was 27. and living with somebody and engaged to them. And, you know, this happens when you're in a very casual three-month thing. It can happen when you're married to somebody. Everybody can relate.

Everybody can relate. And I think that like there's no- Because men don't change. But anyway. Well, I don't want to make this like a male-female thing, but this does seem to be more of a thing that happens in a specific dynamic. It tends to be women being like, oh, my God, he just decided, like, he doesn't want to talk to me anymore.

And there's no explanation. And it's over and it's not up for discussion. Yeah. And I think that, like, the number one question we get from people is like, okay, how do I get closure from this? And I started thinking, like, what is closure, you know? And to me, like, closure is to be, like, a little more, like, clinical and serious. It's, like, a mutually agreed upon story of what happened between you two and a finality to it that you can both sort of agree upon. And that is so rarely achieved.

And, I mean, I think sometimes you just got to walk away from it. No, you're never going to get it. And, like, that's okay, too. And we'll talk about, like, situations that we both went to. But I think this girl just wants closure, wants to understand, like, what happened. And a lot of times you're not necessarily going to get it from the person. Yeah. And I think we want to give, I guess, tools of what to do so you can move on with your life.

You're not losing sleep over this, you know? And I just, I have to reference Jared Freed, who is like, this is why girls want the cheating. And they want the, like, egregious act. And they want something that, like, makes it final. And, like, that's your closure. That's, I really, like, when I worked down my notes for today. He's a liar. terrible. That's why we want it because the other, the alternative is so baffling and confusing

and upsetting. Right. And you're so hard on yourself and you beat yourself up. And I think that there's not a girl in the world that hasn't sat down and like made the laundry list of every single thing they did or said. Could I have changed this and could it have been different? And I think the reality is, you know, yes, you could have changed and it could have been different, but it's, it's not on you to be a detective of your partner's feelings and to be the Sherlock Holmes of what they're thinking all the time. And you shouldn't have to be. take a temperature check every five minutes. Is my relationship okay? Are you okay? How do you feel? You know, you should expect to be told when something is be bothering your partner. Yes. And we both

know women and men are so different. And the way their brains operate are so different. And I was having a conversation with my best, the best guy friend Rob last night about like the parts of the brain, how men have like four parts and women of 16, you know, and like they just do things so much differently and they operate so much differently. And that's why it's so fucked up that we're supposed to be together. But whatever, my mom will tell you that, 40 years of marriage. She's like, it's so fucked up. But it is clinically true. My mom has done a lot of neuroimaging. And even Ian, who was on our show last week, what he was talking about, like sexual studies of people and the parts of the brain that need to light up for women to have an orgasm do not need to light up in a man. And so it actually

is true. Like you are. Our brains are wire. Why are differently? And I think what happens a lot, and also before we get into all this, we're clearly, we're not doing all men, all women. But we're saying for the most part these instances that happen where a woman is very confused and asking why and begging for closure in any way, like, why did this happen? And I think a lot of times men, the relationship's been over for a while and they've been staying in it for whatever reasons. You hope it's not just to like get laid, but like sometimes it is, but they've been staying in it, right?

They're just comfortable or they're trying, or they're optimistic that it's going to change. And I will give an instance of like one of my very good guy friends who recently went through a breakup and he was this is somebody really loved. This is someone that he didn't want to break up with. He was someone he did see a future with at some point and things started shifting and things started bothering about her. And I'm not saying like she was yelling and screaming him. I'm saying like things of just her lifestyle and the way she was doing some things in her

career and different things here and there were bothering him. He's a good guy. He's a nice guy. He didn't want to come down on her. But I think he was kind of mentally putting these things and like we like to say, it's a shitty thing to say, but kind of like tallying these. he strikes against you in a way. I know that sounds kind of negative, but it kind of is what a guy's brain does. And I think he was hoping it might pass. I think he was hoping it was a phase. He didn't

want to be single. He wanted to be in a relationship. He's ready for a family. And I think all these things built up. And he, the relationship was over probably maybe even a month or two before he actually did the thing. And I think when he broke up with her, I know when he broke up with her, she felt blindsided and like, what the fuck? And I think she's, gotten a little closure from him, but he also doesn't feel comfortable insulting her. You know, he doesn't want to say things like, I wish she would have done this. I wish she would have gotten a job or whatever it is. And so I see that happen a lot.

I have had, I do have females that are very intuitive and very smart and mature and intelligent that have really been quote unquote blindsided in a relationship. And I think it happens where guys, they've been doing this thing for a long time. they know that it's been over and so when they break up with you it's already over there you can't even convince them otherwise and the women when something's bothering a woman

in a relationship she tells you about it never had a feeling I didn't express that's what I'm saying like it's so it feels so unfair but I know the person that you're talking about I will really give a lot of credit to me as a nice guy but I think most people in general don't want to hurt their partner and don't want to nag their partner

especially about lifestyle choices you want to just hope it gets better But I think ultimately, like, nobody wants to go so far down the path of never saying anything and never saying anything that the finality of this ending is so absolute that, like, you could never go back. And I think that's probably what happened with him was like he had just, I guess, tallied strikes against her because he didn't want to hurt her feelings. Right. But by the time he realized he had done this for so long, it was over. It was not over. It was over.

We want to kind of offer different things that you can, tools that you can help yourself through these things when they happen. and like as harsh as it sounds, sometimes when this happens, like, you just have to accept that the relationship's over and you may never know exactly what you did or what you could have done. And I hate that a female, because we're talking about a female or a male, if the situation is reversed, could lose sleep at night and think about like, should I've done this differently? Can I do this differently? Like, just stop it. Just know that like this person decided you are not the person for them.

As harsh as it sounds, maybe they fell out of love with you if they were even in love with you in the first place. And I think like sometimes relationships just end for a multitude of reasons. And you don't always get someone telling you these, this is why. I know, but I think that like it eats people inside. It does. There's nobody in the world that's like, you know, and he just, he decided he didn't want to be with me and I feel great about it. Of course not.

There's no such thing as that. I think that like my desire, I want to know that like we have the same story, that when you talk about me at the end of the relationship, when I talk about you, that we share the same story about what happened. But I feel like that doesn't happen a lot. That almost never happens. Like the guys saying these things that you're like, what? Right.

Wait, what? Right. And I, you know, I struggle with the word blindsided because I think that people should take responsibility for their actions and should say to themselves, oh, there were all these clues. And I'm thinking of somebody specifically that like her boyfriend broke up with her and she kept using the word blindsided. And in my mind, I was like, but you guys thought all the time, your relationship was

terrible. What are you talking about? I knew he was going to leave you. Like, I knew this had to end. And I think that, like, the story you're saying does sound like she truly was blindsided. And I don't want to take away from her experience because, like, anything can happen. And I don't know what happened in this relationship. But I also hate the word clues. Because I don't think you should have to be a fucking detective. Right. So I don't, I'm not shitting on men here. I'm just trying to, like, explain the way that men and women are. And like, but if men are listening to this, like, just try harder, like, just try to. explain things that are happening in your relationship, but I think at the same time, this is a thing

I hate that men do. I hate that guys know, no relationships over and they stay in it. Women do it too. Women do the opposite. I have been in relationships where I'm sure people just want to be like, just shut the fuck up already. Do you have to say something about everything all the time? And so I think that is what women do. And I think that like there are specific gender roles. I'm blindsided people. I've done really not nice things to people. And so of you. It just, it does seem to be a specific. Like, I don't have one male friend that would say to me, you know, she just like, she seems so into it. And then all of a sudden she did this terrible thing and then refused to give me an answer about why. Like, I've never heard that story from him, man.

Yeah, exactly. I haven't either. And I had one guy, I mentioned it before, grateful to him forever, that he broke up with me. I mean, we weren't super serious. We've been dating for three months. So we're dating. We're not dating anybody else. I mean, we're exclusively dating.

He met my friends. You know, this is back. I was 27. He was 25. and just super mature guy and he wanted to end it. And he like, we sat down and we had a talk and he kind of went through the things that like I had done in this relationship that he didn't appreciate and kind of, I used to just kind of be a nightmare, whatever, I don't need to get into it. I wasn't like a treat to date. I was fun, but I was kind of terrible. And it just changed my life.

You know? And like I was so lucky to have that and you don't always have that. And I think that if you're, if you get broken up with out of the blue, you feel like you're very supportive. prize and you're confused. I think you can certainly ask the person. Once you've calmed down, I think you can ask, can we talk about this? If they don't want to talk to you, you're going to have to move on. And I think there are some things you can kind of comfort yourself with. And I guess I'll get to that when I share my personal experience. But we did like the whole episode about like how to just might not get it. You know, and I think that a lot of like the notes for I had for today were very similar to that. But like the reality is sometimes the person's never going to give you a

and the closure just needs to be for you that it's over. You've figured on your own. And I think that there's nothing wrong with like, take some time, figure out how you feel, write that email. And if you feel like you really need to send that email and it makes you feel better, send it. You may never hear back from the person and like, well, we'll get to that. To me, like, I've had situations years later where I've gotten the closure that I needed.

We'll talk about that too. Have you had situations where, because I see this happen sometimes because I'm just going to say sometimes guys are fucking pussies, and they don't sit, and they're afraid of confrontation, and that's why they do tally the strikes against you, and that's why they won't give you the closure, and they run away, and that's why that that girl may never hear from that guy, and she said, can you call me? And he just runs away. He owes her something more than that.

Yes. He absolutely does. You owe that to somebody, but if you're just going to be a pussy about it, you're not going to talk to them, that's fine. And I do think that happens. And like, whatever, tell yourself he's a fucking pussy and move on. But I've also seen guys grow up. come back around and be like, apologize years later, months later, when they finally are like,

that was a shitty thing I did. And I've seen that happen. And sometimes it helps. And sometimes a woman can be like, I moved on from this relationship. That was six months ago. That was a year ago. That was five years ago. And this person came back to my life to apologize.

And like, sometimes you don't give a fuck. But sometimes it feels nice. I mean, I don't think there's every situation where it doesn't feel nice. I mean, even if you have moved on with your life, you've had other relationships, it's still nice to hear from somebody. even if you know to your core that what they did to you was so wrong. Right. It's still nice to hear it and I had that happen to me.

I went through a breakup that was so horrific and I talk about it a lot in the show, but, you know, whatever. It's the worst thing that ever happened to me. It's got to come up. So, you know, the person that I was engaged to left me the day after our engagement party. It was a terrible thing. And it's so obvious what happened there, right? Like how he like, he knew he was going to break up with you so much further in advance. And then it got to like, he procrastinated on it, right?

until he was like, oh shit, I can't go to the engagement party. And like, that's just, God, it makes me so mad. Like, that's what I say when I say your fucking pussy. He knew the relationship was over in his head for who knows how long. For a long time. And the laundry list of reasons he sat down and gave me the day that he left me was so long and so hurtful and so insulting. And these were things that, like, had been going on forever.

It wasn't like you did this one thing. It was like, these things have manifested over the years. And, like, I mean, it took me a very long time. I had to realize, like, there was just nothing I could have done to change that. But for me, the horribleness of this breakup really was the closure, honestly, at the time, because, like, it was so horrific and so final. Like, I wasn't even focused on getting reasons for so long because I just wanted to stop being so sad.

I wanted to be able to, like, leave the house and, like, eat a meal again and, like, smile once. And so I think sometimes the gift, like, you were talking about, like, when somebody cheats on you or does me terribly, the gift of that is, it is just over. Yeah. But for me, I started, after, like, dating for a little while, it started to really, like, stew inside of me. Like, did I not fight hard enough for this? And so years later, he asked me to go out to dinner. This was actually pretty recently, which I'm aware.

I was, like, sitting at home just having a panic attack. It was no big deal. Ashley said to me, what do you want to get out of this? I said, there's nothing got particular one. I didn't necessarily want anything out of it. We sat down, and he just started, like, apologizing to me, like, crazy, and I'm so sorry. and everything that happened between us, I could have told you about. And he said, I was more interested in just getting along with you than I was in telling

you that you were wrong or you were hurting me. And I sat there with him and I remembered like being in love with him. And I joked around with him and it was comfortable and it was familiar and it was normal. And it felt really nice. And I remembered loving him. But all these things started to come up and I sort of remembered like why we weren't together anymore. And that was my closure.

That was the minute I was like, like, you know what? I didn't, if I had, I sort of had this opportunity to, like, peer through the looking glass of what our life would have been like together over the last four years and talking about all these things he's going through now. And I was like, oh my God, like, I'm so glad that this didn't work out. And so that was a closure for me. But like, that's not something I ever hoped for. I didn't want it necessarily. I didn't need it. It happened. I guess it puts a period on the experience for me. And like, that's it. And it's over. Right. I mean, I think it, I think it was best case scenario. But I know that situation where you start talking to your ex and all, like,

I feel like for my friends, I'm like, oh my God, well, I'm going to have to go through this with you again. This is going to be so bad for both of us. Well, what happened to me? So I will share an experience that I am sharing it, not just like to talk about myself and share a story, but because I feel like at the end of it, I feel like people were looking at me like, oh God, are you okay? And like, are you so fucking confused and blindsided and like, do you need closure? And, And so I'd just like to share what I did. So I had an ex-boyfriend and we reconnected in kind of like a closure way. Like we had this conversation that was like, I'm not mad at you anymore.

I am happy for you, what you're doing in your career, this and that. It was nice. And I'm glad that that happened. And what happened after that was just we started to talk all the time. And it's because we get along so well and we know each other so well. we make each other laugh and we really loved each other at one point. And he had a girlfriend. I want to give you a little credit ahead of time and just say that like, I don't think that

you opened the door to talk. I think that you really just wanted to put a period on this and say, I just want to get along and if I see you on the street, not have to cross the street. I don't think that that was your intention to start talking. Absolutely. So yeah, let's make that clear. So a lot of the contact was initiated by him. And we don't live in the same city.

So it wasn't like a let's meet up. This was not me trying to break him and his girlfriend up, you know, but it was nice to talk to him. We talked. I was like, I don't know what's going on your relationship, but it's not my business. Whatever. I was like, it can't be that serious if you're talking to me every day, but whatever. It was a lot.

And it was a lot. And he was calling me all the time. And it was nice. It was nice to talk to him. Okay. And so it went on for like two months. And I told myself that this was someone that I really loved and had been hurt by in the past, and I was not going to let that happen again.

And I said, this feels good to me to reconnect with him and laugh with him and talk to him. But the second that it doesn't feel good to me anymore, I'm going to cut it off and take care of myself. And I think that you also did the right thing. I want to give like, you knew that he had the girlfriend. And I don't think that this felt at the time romantic. It wasn't like you were sexting him late at night. I wouldn't like it, though. It was my boyfriend.

Yeah, right. There was no sex team, but it was like, you know, a lot of reminiscing about the relationship. It was inappropriate. I wouldn't like it if it was my man. That's what I'm saying. It was inappropriate. You as like a female, I don't think necessarily did anything wrong because you don't live anywhere near these people. You don't know anything about their relationship.

And it wasn't of a sexual nature. It was for absolutely, yes. This isn't like sending naked pics or something like that. But again, for someone that has a girlfriend, it was very inappropriate. And I would die if that was my boyfriend. Totally. But so I was like, you know, something happened, whatever. I saw some on social media and I was like, oh,

ouch, hurts a little bit. Because I'm sorry, anyone that has that serious ex, any girl can relate. You, you, you want, the feelings can come back. You sat there with your ex and you remembered what it was like to be with him and you were attracted to him and you laughed and you guys had a good time. So I can't deny that, like, I was wondering, like, are we supposed to be back together, you know, like, what's going on here? And so it was very stressful for me.

For me. Right. It was very stressful for me. like, what's going to happen? We can't, like, pick her up off the floor another time. And so, because of this guy. And so I was like, you know what? This feels bad. I'm going to end this. This is not healthy for anybody. And I told him, I was like, I don't regret us reconnecting. I'm not mad. But this is not a good thing for me. It's not healthy for me or your relationship for that matter. And I think it's best that we stop this communication. And he launched and

a whole thing of I am very confused. It feels like we're communicating better than we used to. It feels like all the bad shit is gone. When I've been spending certain times with my girlfriend, I keep thinking about you and the times that we spent together. And I didn't realize you were still such a big part of my life. And I'm just confused. And I was like, I cannot have this conversation with you while you're in a relationship with somebody else. I just can't do it. And I said, I'm not going to be able to talk to you. And he's like, we can't talk anymore. I'm like, I'm not doing this again. Like, I don't know how to say this to you. Not because I don't have feelings for you because I can't do this again.

And I'm like protecting myself. Right. And we're not friends. Like we'll do a whole episode about taking to be friends. This wasn't, we weren't trying to be friends. Like there. I know there was feelings still there. And that's what he's telling me.

And I'm like, maybe you shouldn't be in this relationship, you know? Like, but that's not my business. I'm going to, I'm out of it. I'm out of here. I wish you the best. Ended it on a very like, I'm sure we'll talk here and there at some point. Congrats on this and that when big things happen in our lives. This isn't like get the fuck away from me forever.

But it's like this can't continue. you to happen in this way at this frequency. This is not healthy for anybody. And I think he was trying to have this conversation. I'm like, I'm not talking about this. You are in a serious relationship. Do you think he like played down and pretended that he didn't like know what you meant? No, I think he was just like, wait, wait, I've been really enjoying talking to you. I'm confused. I have still feelings for you, whatever it was, you know? Like, I'm like, now's not, I mean, then be single. You know what I mean? Like, I don't know what to tell you. I'm not setting myself up for this again. and he proposed her two weeks later.

It's really fucked up. Was it even two weeks later? I mean, it's really fucked up and crazy. It was crazy. And I think everybody was like, whoa, ho, you know, like, what the fuck? Like, people that knew that we'd reconnected. I didn't tell everybody. I had a few close friends that knew that we had reconnected.

I, like, stopped in traffic. I, like, could not. It was shocking. Yeah, it was really shocking. and but for me it was the ultimate closure. You know, like I will tell you guys straight up. I didn't cry. I've cried over this guy plenty.

I didn't cry at all. I didn't feel sad. I felt like, well, that's it. I never have to wonder again. You know, like the stress and like the toll that it takes on you to wonder, like, should I rearrange my life and try to be back with this person? Is this person for me? Like you said, did I try hard enough?

Have I changed enough? Has he changed enough? All these questions that are going through your head, the decision was made. He proposes someone else and I don't want to be with that guy. You know, like I don't, I'm not saying he's a bad guy, but like a guy that can do that is not somebody I want to be with. And I think a lot of times that's a tip I want to offer. And I know that's easier said than done.

But when somebody does something like that or does something like anything that's like dishonest or leads you on, you should know that's not a good person to be with. Like bullet dodged. You know what I mean? It's just I really have to tell you. I was, I'm not even saying this is a joke. I was expecting a huge grand gesture from him. I was waiting for the day that you told me that, like, he just landed at JFK to be with you.

That he had, like, quit his job and his relationship and moved here to be with you. He went the other direction. He did a huge gesture. He did the other direction. And, like, I mean, I don't know how you could have any other reaction then just be like, well, that's not a guy that I could be with because, like, what a horrible thing. And I try to always understand what the other person is thinking. But, like, every single day he was with this person.

he had to ask her family's permission to marry her. It takes a while to buy a ring. You don't just wake up one morning and get the money to buy a ring. You think about this. You think about your future with somebody. You had to be planning this for a while, all the while talking to you. And what was he waiting for you to stop him? Right.

All those things. But honestly, like it kind of was the ultimate closure of like, well, that's that. That's over forever. And so it felt, that felt good. And then a little bit of time went by. And then I got angry as in just like, how did this happen? and I didn't deserve this. And, like, I was nothing but kind and supportive and, like, honest this whole time.

And I just didn't deserve to, like, be blindsided like this. It was a true blind side. Like, I just didn't see that coming. And I felt like even as a friend, even as someone that's, like, that knows so much about me, like, owed me more than this. And why did you do this? Like, who are you? Like, how did you?

And so I was like, I just, my initial thing was like, I'm just going to let this, when it first happened, I was like, I'm not, I'm going to let this guy affect me anymore. This is over. But then I was like, nope, you know what? I don't think he gets to be like, I'm a good guy and everything's fine and Ashley's fine with this. And what I did was fine. And so the motions had obviously settled. And I wrote an email that was very calm.

It wasn't screaming. It wasn't mad. It wasn't angry. It was like, I don't understand how this happened. I don't really understand what your game plan was with this. I feel misled. And I didn't deserve this. I'm a human.

I have feelings. My life's fucking great. But it doesn't matter. Like, it's, I'm still like a. person with feelings, you know? And like, I just didn't deserve this like this. And I may not get a response from you and that's fine. And I hit send and I never got a response from him. And I feel totally okay with it. I'm glad that you did it. And I was really angry for you and I didn't want to like add Jill to the fire. And I don't know. I don't want to be like, he's a terrible guy. He's a

bad guy. I'm sure every person on earth that's listening to this podcast is like, fuck him. He's a bad guy. Or some guys listening would be like, oh, I know what happened here. Right. You know, like, I mean, I think he really was probably waiting for you to stop him from doing this and you didn't do that and I also think that like or not I don't know maybe they're great I don't know I don't think that you opened the door for this to be like a romantic flirty thing but I think he was like continually like reaching out and wanting advice and wanting to joke with you and even like tagging you in memes it's not appropriate and I wouldn't want my man to do it I don't like it and I think that like for him to just turn around and do this like I've had

people that I've known for a week show me more decency than that right and even some like a very small thing that like comes up for me is like last year I was going down to DC to hang out with some friends, but I thought I was going to see an ex of mine. And he called me to tell me, I started seeing somebody else. I just want to tell you that. A lot of respect. I care about you. And I just want to be honest with you.

And I don't know. Other things happened after that. But I appreciate the phone call. He didn't need to do that. And it was a nice thing to just be like, I know that you're probably planning on hanging out with me and my friends this weekend. That cannot happen. I just want to be honest with you.

And like, Meryl, we talk about all the time. Two of her exes, she's had a really great solid relationship. So props, two of her exes have let her know that they were going to propose to their girlfriend. Like, they've been done for years. It wasn't even anything. There's no even animosity there, but just as a courtesy, because you're going to see this on the fucking internet. Right. Like, it was just like, people were so scared to tell me.

And I just can say, I think what I did was good. I didn't react initially at all. You know, it took a week, 10 days before I even set that email. I was able to tell myself like, oh, God, closure upon closure, upon closure. Like this relationship is so over. That's not a person I want to be with. There was a reason we broke up in the first place over, over, over. And on top of that, I sent the email that I need to send.

And I actually did expect a response, but I didn't get one. And that's fine too. And I clearly don't have any expectations of this person anymore. But I think sometimes if you need to say your peace, then you need to say it. And I fully respect the need to like let yourself calm down. Like don't send emails and text and phone calls when you're heated. Let time go by and like process your feeling. and like tell this person how they made you feel if you need to.

Yeah, nothing wrong with it. I'm a big fan of sharing your feelings. And, you know, I see the other side of the coin where like if somebody breaks up with you and they do the right thing and they break up with you in a respectful kind of way and they have moved on, you can write one email. Write one email and that's fine, share your feelings. But like you can't browbeat somebody into telling you what happened. You can't, you can't beg them.

You can't like, yes. Like this is something like girls do this. Whatever. People do this. Like, I need closure. I need closure. And it's honestly, you know. you're just trying to talk to the person again.

Like, you're just trying to get them back in your life. And then you start to, like, really push them away. And, like, I know somebody that just, this guy's moved on. Their relationship sucked in the first place. He is a new girlfriend. And she's continually like, but I need closure. And it's like, girl, right. The breakup was closure.

He gave you all the closure. Yeah. Want to talk about the email we got? Well, I don't know. We got a ton of email. I mean, it's just funny because it's not funny. But sometimes people just stop feeling, feeling it. Well, at the big, when you said you were pulling up an email, I didn't, this is not

email I thought you were going to read. We got another email like the same day. And this girl was just like I dated this guy for a couple of months. He asked me to be exclusive on like a Wednesday. I said yes. Keeps like being weird about plans all weekend. I thought we had like brunch plans. He like wouldn't like answer his phone, wouldn't talk to me,

wouldn't confirm plans. Monday rolls around and he's like, you know what? I just, I'm not ready for a relationship. I just don't want to do this. Like what? Yeah. You asked me to do you. You did this. You pursued this. Right. And then five days later, I've done something wrong, by simply accepting your proposal that we, like, not date other people. Like, I'm so crazy.

In that situation, she said she weighed a little bit to sleep with him. It sounded like it happened shortly thereafter. Oh, she had sex with him. Then he was like, we should be exclusive. I don't remember. I think it went like he wanted to be exclusive. They fucked. And then he was out.

Listen, that guy's an asshole. Okay. Like, if you, if they're, you go on a few dates with the guy. You're a month in. He's like, can we be exclusive? Can we be exclusive? And then he breaks up with you. Fuck that guy.

Seriously. That's your answer. though, that's your closure. That's your answer. But like, do not even waste an ounce more of energy. Like, you can be frustrated, but like, it happens to every female. It happens to every male. Like, we all go through it just like, fuck that person, move on.

Do not replay your actions. Do not, like, wonder what you could have done differently. You couldn't have done it even differently. Right. Replay every single scenario in your head and, like, what you would have done differently. The point is in that moment, you felt like doing that thing and you did what was honest to yourself. You did what you wanted to do.

So, I don't know. I don't know how to wrap this up. Well, here's, here's the thing. There's different levels to it. There's dating a guy for a short period of time. Maybe you just want to fuck you. Who fucking cares? Move on. Right. Analyze that guy all day long. You're never going to get an answer. What's the difference? I think you can ask somebody that breaks up with you that you feel like it's out of the blue. I think you let your get your thoughts together and ask them, hey, this was a little confusing to me. Is it possible that we can have a conversation? If they don't even engage with you at all, fuck them. Fucking pussy. But sometimes you'll get me? Sometimes. you'll get something out of them. Right. But if you don't, then it's done. It's done. I can't, there's not a girlfriend that I have on earth that does not have a story of a boyfriend

that they were dating that just like broke up with them at a text message. And that person's a dick. And maybe in months or years, they will apologize to you. It almost always happens. I wouldn't bank on it. And I wouldn't decide that you need that to move on with your life. You just got to do it. I don't know, like, how else to explain it.

Like, everybody on earth has gone through this. You just, you might never get the answer. Yeah, you might not. And like, you know, like we said at the beginning, like, guys operate differently, you know, like it sucks. I hope guys listening to this can be a little more communicative. But I think sometimes, like, they make this decision long before they actually break up with you. And if you feel the need to say something in an email or if they're, then then do that too, you know, but no, you might not get a response and like be okay with that and like go to bed and wake up. And if that response comes through, that might upset you even more. But just I think if you have, you have to be okay. And have to get something off your chest. Like, I think that's fine. Go listen to one of our episodes called How to Survive a Breakup. That's how you're going to get over it. Tons of great advice.

Listen to our podcast. Oh, yeah. Listen to the podcast. I just, I just, it bums me out to think that people go through life and are like, why? What could I have done differently? It's like a lot of times not. But I will say this, you know, rain and I both had serious relationships and where we were with guys that felt emasculated and this and that.

And like, I got some feedback on that. It's helped me in like in my future relationships. I pick my battles a little more. I treat people a little bit more compassion. You know, like, me personally, I'm not speaking for you. But, like, I definitely was able to get feedback in that relationship after our breakup that has helped me now. I mean, I would certainly rather the feedback during the relationship than after it. I try to be out here.

I try to be out here for years. Like, years. Fuck. Like, I didn't get, like, that feedback from my ex until we're, like, sitting at a bar and he's 17 drinks deep. And he finally said the words to me that I knew were so true, which were that, I let you think you were right all the time because it was easier to do that than fight with you. And how unfair is that? But I got to just like, wake up every morning with the birds chirping thinking that I'm just

the rightest person that's ever lived all the time. I can take it. And I can tell you, all women can take it. We're not all these like crazy delicate flowers that like can't handle any criticism. And you know what? If you think that you're with a female that can't handle any criticism, then that is also not the person for you. For sure. You know? And I love that you said that because I think a lot of times, and again, I was at dinner last night with all these guys and we were discussing this topic.

And they were like, we're not trying to insult you, but like sometimes when you give a woman negative feedback, like she cries and all this stuff. And like, for me too, I think it's like all the time about the approach. Like you never talk about things that are bothering your relationship when you're mad, you're heated, you're upset. Like, I don't, none of my girlfriends I can think of if they were in a relationship with a guy and he was like, hey, I just, I really want to talk to you. You know, pour a glass of wine. Everybody's calm. This has been bother me in this relationship. I don't know. Brandon did this with me recently.

Something bothered you in our relationship. You sat me down and we talked about it and we've been like stronger than ever. Like you can do it. And it's not comfortable. And I mean, yes, I'm glad. I mean, I don't know. I was never thinking of bringing this up. But it was like, it's not easy to tell a person that you love, that you care about. Like this is a business partnership, but it's a partnership. Yeah.

It's not easy to tell a person you care about like you're doing this thing and it hurts me. But I'd rather you tell me and maybe I will cry in the moment than fuck me up for years to come? Like, what is the alternative that I had to have these psychological problems forever because you can't ever trust another person to not leave me the day after my engagement party? The next time somebody proposed me, I'm going to be like, are you sure? Are you sure you want to do this? Every time a guy asks me out, I'm like, I can't say yes. Because I'll never talk to me. It fucks you up. And that's what makes me sad that like if this stuff happens to you again and again, you're just always worried. And then that's when the walls come up. And that's what makes you

And it's a bummer, you know? Like, it's a bummer that like, you're like, I just keep getting fucked over. Are all men terrible? You know? And I don't know, guys. Like, I guess if it's happening you over and over and you're like, I can't do this again, like, look at my inspiration, you know. Look at these guys that just like asked me out and then totally disappeared.

I still said yes yesterday to a date. Still out here. My heart is open. I think that it should be because like the sins of another person are not the sins of the next person. And I've never, ever carry. There's tons of things wrong with me. But one thing that I have never done is carried the false of the last person into the next relationship.

Because I was with somebody for years who cheated on me, like crazy cheated on me. If you guys go back to one of the first episodes, I said flate. What did I say? Fragrantly cheating on me? He fragrantly cheated. I used to drink a lot when we would record this. Wait, what was this name of our scent? Fragrantly cheating by Raina Greenberg.

Available only at Lauren Taylor, where she's not allowed to go. That's an important. So anyways, just because he cheated on me and was such a scumbag behind my back did not mean that I assume the next person would do that. And yeah, I guess it sucks that this keeps happening to time after time. Like, if this guy just ghost you or whatever it is, dumps you out of the blue, like, be glad you didn't waste another year your life with them, you know? I just think about like what that person is going to be like problem solving other things forever,

you know? Do you want to enter into any problem solving with that person? No. No. Right. All right. We are going to light it up, I promise. Oh shit.

We have to play a game. We play a game. I forgot. We still have a fucking game on top of this. Okay. Okay. We got time. This will be quick.

Okay. Really? Whatever. I think this is a good topic. You guys have been asking for it. So here you go. It is probably one of the number one thing we get emails about is like this guy just like fucking blindsided this shit out of me.

Like, what do I do? So hopefully this helped. Hopefully all the shitty things Ashley and I've gone through in our lives. Yeah, we do it for you guys. Yeah. We do it for you guys. It's for work. We go through shit, so you don't have to.

All right. Do you want to kick it off? Yes. We're playing fuck Mary Kill. We're playing Fuck Mary Kill. We have a couple different buckets we're going to do. I'm excited for what you're going to pull out here. You were laughing.

So you want to kick it off? I can't wait. Okay. This is kind of a deep cut. I hope you like it. I'm excited. I love when you say deep cut. I've been trying to work it into my vocabulary and it keep forgetting.

Fuck Mary Kill. Face tat edition. Are we talking about Post Malone? All right. Post Malone. Lowellane. Lil Zan. I don't know what Lil Zan is because I just looked him up the other night.

He looks like he's 12. Pull him up. Let me see what Lil Zan looks like. Okay. That kid doesn't have teeth. Oh my God. This is the hardest thing you've ever done today. He's a little scary looking.

I know what I'm going to do that. Okay. I'm going to kill Lel Zan because how old is he's 12? He's 12. He's 12. Actually, you can't throw a child. in here. He's 22. I wouldn't put in some statutory rape shit.

Or child murder. Child murder. I have to kill a little Zan because it looks like he's 12. All right. Then I'm left with the last two. Love you post Malone. I love Post Malone, but I feel like I love Lowellane's music and I just like want to listen to it for the rest of my life. So like I'm totally

marrying Lowellane. Also he's the richest. And you're fucking Post Malone. Oh God. With condoms. condoms and a dental dam. So many condoms. Six condoms. I'm going to wrap it in paper towels and a dental dam. I do love him, though.

And I love seeing him live. He seems so humble and nice. I hope he never does anything terrible. He looks really like him. Dirty. Yeah. Like if you touched him, you would get a TV. I've seen the meme.

It's like he looks like the 1% of bacteria that like a cleaner doesn't kill. Oh, they're like, 99% of bacteria. He's like the 1%. I also did a deep cut for you. Ooh. fictionalized high school football player. Addition. What, like James Vanderbeek?

You guys, we put on so many. This is amazing. Staying the street court texting everybody and you, like, what kind of category can I do? And it just came to me. This is so good. But the caveat is you have to fuck them as the character. Okay, yeah, yeah, for sure. Not the actor.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. James Vanderbik as Mock's. Mawks. That's right. Mawks. I don't want your laugh. Tim Reggins, Friday Night Lights, yeah. Or Ryan Gosling as Little Allen and Remember the Titans.

Oh my God. He was not even hot that movie. I remember the Titans. I like that guy named Sunshine. Oh, fuck, yeah. Which he looks like Clemson's. He looks like a Clemson's quarterback right now. They have this long hair.

Crazy hot. I loved him. Whatever happened to him? That guy? Like, nothing. Nothing. I think he's a model. Nothing ever happened.

And also, like, definitely the hardest I've ever cried in any movie. Oh, sure. I know the tight right now. Cry all day. All right. Cool. Fuck Mary kids. This is good.

I know, right? I don't care about him though. He looked like a little bitch in that movie. He was a little kid. I mean, he was very skinny. He wasn't like Ryan Gosling. Kill him. Kill him.

Okay. Enough people haven't died in this movie already, Ashley. Oh my gosh. Tough. Okay. Tim Reggans. Mocks. Ew.

I just wasn't. Oh, you know, who was the hot football player in varsity blues? It wasn't Mocks. Oh, yeah. Paul Walker. Smoke show. R. I guess I'll marry him.

He had like a nice family, right? His parents were still together. Fuck Tim Riggins. You have to. I changed my mind. I'm going to marry Tim Riggins. I want to look at him forever. I'll fuck Mok's in the whipped cream bikini.

He's just, he's sad. I want to fix him? Yeah, yeah. Okay. Fuck Mok's. Marryton's little bitch ass and remember the time. Here's the other thing. I know that we have a lot of fans in this.

His high school character edition. Okay. We haven't done this in a while. an oldie but a goody. Fuck Mary Kill, previous guest edition. Guess I talk the most about. Okay.

Lev. Jared Freed. Jeremy Jacobowitz. I mean, I think I feel like I already said this. I already said that I'm going to marry. You know what? I think I'm going to mix it up. Mix it up.

I think I'm going to marry Lev. And I'm going to kill Jeremy. Because I married him last time. I'm killing Jeremy. I'm just going to fuck Jared. You know. I'm so curious. He's like so loud.

You yell dirty talk at you. Fuck Jared. Kill Jeremy. Sorry. Boo. And then Mary Lev. What you're apologizing for is to Jeremy and not to me. Okay.

You ready? I'm ready. Previous guest edition. Shep. Noah. Justin McLeod. Founder of Hinge. Shep.

Noah. Justin McLeod. Okay. So here's why this is very difficult for me. chef actually is like a, I think he's money. He's like a successful guy and he's very good looking. Noah too. And the hinge guy is, but he's like going to have money forever and he has money now.

Okay, so like money can't be part of my decision because they all have money. But long lasting. Hinge's got the longest lasting money, right? Yeah. Okay. Oh my God, you stopped me so bad. You really got to fuck Noah just to see what it's like. Does he have like a mirror above the bed?

Does he have like dumbbells? I would definitely fuck now. He's like doing crunches. I've been there, done that. Oh, that's right. Stop. I didn't have sex with no. We just made out and we were 12.

But you didn't remember. He's the one that told you that. Allegedly. Not memorable. Not memorable. I don't remember things that happened last week. And then kill Shep. I don't know.

I might marry Shep. He seems fun. Like you could just have fun with him. He's going to be like a fun, drunk old man. Forever he'll be fun. Like you go boating with him. I don't want to. to kill Justin, though, because then what if Hinge goes under?

He's so sweet, though. And he's going to have money forever. I'm going to marry Shapp. I'm going to fuck now. Kill Justin McLeod. Sorry, guys. Hinge's canceled. Okay, we've got to wrap up. Closing announcements. We're going to make a quick. Like I mentioned, register to vote. Vote. It's vote.org. That's super easy. If you don't know where to start, go to vote.org. Seven letters and one punctuation. Right. We'll put on the story, swipe up. So vote.org.

Follow us. Instagram. Girls Got to eat podcasts. Check on the live show. Nashville, Lev's going to be there. Meet and Greet, you can still add meeting greets to your Chicago and Atlanta tickets. We have a show coming up around the holidays. We're not going to announce it. We're not allowed to announce it yet. We're freaking out. I'm going to wear a red wedding dress to the holiday event.

We're going to wear red and green ball gowns. I don't even care about the show. Oh my gosh, guys. We're so excited. We're like crying about it. Okay, keep going. And now you want to shame everybody really quickly about rates and reviews. Please rate and review us.

Keep putting us to your Instagram stories. We love them. We love sharing them. Please keep sending us to your text messages about it. us. Do you love to see what you guys say about us behind her back? And keep approaching us in public, also. Oh my God, keep approaching us.

Some girl jumped out of an alleyway last night. She goes, Raina. And I look at her and I'm like, I'm sorry, I can't place you. And she was like, no, you don't know me. I'm just a fan of the show. And I was like, what kind of way is that? Did you? Adam, a dark alleyway.

Oh, my God. Someone came up to me at yoga. I was like sweating like a pig. Anyways. All right, guys. Thank you. Thank you. So much.

Have a great week. Bye, guys. Bye. Thank you.