Girls Know Nothing - S2 Ep13: Emily English - Nutrition, Bullying & Body Dysmorphia

Episode Date: May 3, 2023

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leave the house now without meeting someone or seeing someone who knows my lasagna or knows my hot girl pita and it's amazing I that's such a cool thing to be known for though I feel like you've like dominated that market because there is nobody else out there that can make content the same way you do I never ever thought it was going to be my thing though so I've always loved food and I never trained in like content creation I literally just picked up my phone one day and I used to I used to have my phone used to balance it in my cupboard with like a cup of um of like rice on top of it so to stop it flopping over and just record top down my chopping board and I go back to like

my earliest reels and I howl at myself but literally the whole journey I've just taught myself literally when I look at your content I feel like there must be like a whole camera crew cameras behind everything you do because it looks so good it's literally me my kitchen I have like a roll out marble um plastic mat plastic mat that I put down, a chopping board, two sets of lights, and then I have a head tripod on my phone. I do it all on my phone. I get quite a few people who message me thinking,

oh, like what professional setup do you have? Like what camera do you use? I'm like, the only thing that you need to content create is your iPhone. That's literally insane because like I said, it looks so good. But going back to your first kind of reels what inspired you to actually go into nutrition in the first place? So I had quite a turbulent process with food and relationship with food and I remember as a young kid I was always the really tiny stick thin girl who I actually used to get bullied because

people used to call me anorexic and I used to do a lot of sports so I competed in cross-country athletics and food was just very much a fuel I enjoyed it and in my family situation I was responsible for a lot of the cooking so I'm one of five and my mom had three uh three kids under the age of three when I was about seven or eight years old so I suddenly had to become very independent because my mom wasn't able to look after me in the same way anymore I mean three kids under the age of three that is so much time my dad had to work to grow his business all the time as well and people have this impression of me sometimes that they think that I come from this kind of

very silver spoon well-to-do like privileged situation but the reality is like I really came from from nothing like my I'm so proud of my dad because he went through a lot of his own issues to become a successful businessman that he is now but at that time things were hard and food was something that was a bit of a stress and I remember my mum doing the shop and one day everything came and it was like full budget mode and there were no treats no sweets and she was like I need you to make dinner. So from a very early age, I had to look into quite empty fridges and cupboards and stick something together. And this is where like chili con carne, like casserole stews, all of those things were something that was bounced around my house quite often. Then I started to become a young woman. So age of 17, I was at V Festival one year

and I got a tap on my shoulder and someone asked me if I wanted to come for a test shoot for ASOS. And this was all internal, all in-house at ASOS. And as a 17 year old girl, I was like, what? Any girl's dream, right? What? I shopped at ASOS all the time

and I'd just come back from holiday as well so I was super tanned I was feeling myself and I went and did this test shoot and um they they booked me and I had the best year and a half two years at ASOS they were an amazing community they're an amazing support I felt nurtured and safe and and confident in that whole process and never once did I ever feel conscious about my body or conscious about me um kind of visually and of course there were other girls who had longer shinier hair and I was like oh my lips aren't as as big as that but it never it didn't really affect me I didn't have it kind of internalize in a negative way and then of course I was still growing and developing as a woman and I started to become a little bit curvier a little bit bigger my thighs started to grow

I had the best summer of my life I I went, I took my mom to Chicago. We had deep pan pizza. We went to the baseball game and had hot dogs and milkshakes and all the just like the amazing life experiences that I'm so pleased I got to have. And I came back and the model book is ASOS decided that it would be a really good opportunity for me to get a modeling agency. So this is separate from anything to do with asos and i got that agency and they basically

triggered something inside of me that suddenly i felt like i wasn't good enough looking the way that i was they commented on my weight they commented on my thighs they'd just taken polaroids of me and then call me into a room to critique me and I've always I've never been a person who is one of those girls who's like I don't give a fuck I don't care like I do care I'm sensitive and I don't think that's a bad thing and I don't think I should have to change that thing about myself but what they said and what they did to me I don't know what it was but it was like a switch that flicked inside my brain and I remember coming home just in my mind on that train from London and I walked into my house and my mum was there and she just put dinner in front of me and I felt so much anger and resentment towards her at that point

and I looked at that plate and I remember it was a chicken pie and I said I don't know why you're feeding this like I can't eat this like anymore I need to change like I'm too big I don't look like I should look and I even remember that evening going out for a run and that whole mindset of I'm I'm doing this because I need to get smaller I need to shrink myself I need to fit into this mold I need approval because if I'm ever gonna be looked at and I want people to look at me and think oh wow like you're great then I need to be this certain way and that's where I lost myself and it was probably about six to eight months of extreme restrictive eating I was petrified of anyone else touching or feeding my food I cooked everything myself I became so obsessive I weighed I weighed a spinach leaf like I would literally weigh my spinach leaves and I'd be there on my fitness pal like my body was a mass equation

every single gram every single ounce and there was one defining day where it was summer it was hot I was really small at this point I was not getting booked at ASOS anymore people were concerned about me and my mum cooked these um bacon um cheese rolls for everyone and everyone was just sitting down like a normal family with the cheese roll in front of them a cup of tea and they were just tucking in and this is the first time I think that my mum pushed me a little bit so she was like here's a roll eat it and I literally had this nervous breakdown in my kitchen where I crumbled into a ball and I just sobbed I was like I can't do this anymore I can't eat I can't eat this roll I don't know why this is just a fucking cheese roll and it was that moment

that I just knew so so deep down in myself that this wasn't who I was this wasn't who I wanted this wasn't who I wanted to be like I didn I wanted, this wasn't who I wanted to be, like I didn't want to live my life as a prisoner to what I thought I should be and should look like and I ended up finding an incredible therapist, her name was Jane, she specialised in eating disorders and I started that journey and just started to kind of break my way out of it and I remember leaving the whole modeling industry behind it was something that was a hard decision for me because I was very financially stable I suddenly became very financially independent and I had to turn around and say none of this is worth it to me because my health and my happiness actually is the most important

thing. And it was at that point, like I, I loved school as a bit of a science buff. So I love biology and chemistry. And I swapped my degree to go and study nutrition because as someone who has a very inquisitive, creative mind, what I was doing to myself made no sense like I'm a very I'm very kind of like not black and white thinker but I like to understand and appreciate the reason for doing something yet I was doing this to my body with absolutely no knowledge of nutrition I didn't learn a single thing about nutrition for my whole journey of school, which is actually really bonkers because you think how vulnerable we are as women

to culture, diet culture, what we feel we should look like and body image. Why does no one talk about normalizing food? So I went to King's, got my BSc and the rest is history. Yeah, I think when you were talking about how do we not learn about food i think my entire education on nutrition was pie chart yeah yeah the eat well plate the yeah and it was like this amount of carbs this amount of fruit and vegetables and this amount of protein or dairy and i was like but you know everybody's body's different we all need

different things what about you know when you break it down it's not just macros it's micronutrients as well and especially as women I went to an all-girls school and you know different parts of your monthly cycle you need different things in your body or you need more or less yeah but it is very very confusing place and I think that you know one thing you touched upon I don't think a lot of people talk about our two or our two skits talk about is that skinny you know, one thing you touched upon, I don't think a lot of people talk about, or are too scared to talk about, is that skinny shaming is a thing. Yeah. You know, I was a very petite kid

before I started playing sports. And it was, it's still hurtful. It was just as hurtful as fat shaming, but we think it's okay because you're slim. Yeah. I remember there was one day that I was, I was probably 16 or 17, and I was wearing these coated black jeans skinny jeans because they were all the rage and I was walking through um King's Cross and this group of guys

were going anorexic anorexic like from behind me and this was before I'd even like touched base with any sort of like modeling and I remember being so conscious thinking I don't have a bum I don't have boobs but the reality is that was my body yeah that was my body I was healthy I was eating I was moving and I think we all have this like sometimes we all get a little bit detached from ourselves and we're so busy thinking about others and what we want and what we should look like where the reality is I always try and tell people do it for you compete with yourself be the best version of yourself and if that means moving in a way that feels good for you then do it if that means nourishing your body with the right foods that make you feel energized then do it but don't forget that you are you

and you don't need to be anyone else to find happiness in that it's really it's actually disgusting to hear that people would shout that at you yeah especially grown adults like men yeah sometimes it's not okay but sometimes you kind of expect it from teenagers and children because you know they're immature and it's just you think it's funny at the time you don't really realize the impact of what you're doing but as a full-grown adult to say that to somebody is disgusting yeah and it's so funny because I literally like I say the voice because I remember it so clearly yeah and that was such a like an imprinting moment in my life and and it was on my body it must have been really confusing for you growing up as a teenager to be

told by one group of society that you're too skinny and then to go into modeling and be told that you're too big it was a whirlwind as well because I've I'm such a people pleaser and I think with with the way that I grew up I I was always the person who wasn't quite good enough. I wasn't quite the best. I wasn't quite the fastest, the smartest. I wasn't the most pretty at school and I wasn't the most popular, but I wasn't a super geek.

And like, you know, I never really felt like I had a place. So I was always searching for like a reason to be approved of and belong. And I think that manifested so hideously in me that when that situation with the agency did happen I couldn't cope like I crumbled into I lost myself that rationale that self-identity like who am I and what do I want that just went straight out the window but I also remember at the time like I grew up in that era where Instagram just started to be a thing and I remember booty and I remember being exposed to the first round of influencers who were perfectly curvy and posted all these bikini pictures and um just this constant bombardment of you can't eat bread here is this gluten-free

fun-free egg-free everything free and I remember making these recipes that were so wrapped up in diet culture yeah like we're the same age and so we got bombarded at the same time at the peak where nothing was controlled yeah i literally remember it's you know i was i've always been a pretty much a healthy size a all of my life and i remember seeing constant pictures of detox teas yeah and trying to force myself to drink a detox tea yeah knowing that it would make me projectile vomit because i thought that's what i should do to make myself skinnier can you believe that was normalized like that was that was served every single influencer or or day one influence at the time was literally pushing they were there with I remember following this account

called top skinny girls and it would just post pictures of girls with their bodies in different angles and then they'll be like the booties in there and it's just so toxic and I remember that like anorexic like um hashtags yeah were around about pro-ana yeah and like inspo and stuff like that and it actually I think that for me was like a major wake-up call because I was never going in that direction but I knew people that were yeah and it wasn't until like I really saw it on social media in that way that it really freaked me out and I was like wow this is a really big issue because I was like I was exercising the same way you were describing to like as a form of control yeah not

as a way to like move and feel good and think well about myself I think it's all about language and it's all about mindset when you're doing these things and that's what I try and really push out my social media page it's it's okay to have a set of goals and I think there's this balance between obviously freedom and body positivity but that's why I always say like don't do it to become anything other than the best version of you and make sure that it's coming from that positive mindset so if I have a really amazing um for example so my couple of my best friends came down the other weekend we had a Saturday lunch together we probably had a little bit too much rose we had pasta in an Italian restaurant

we got we had just the best time then we went um like out afterwards a few more cocktails a few more like snacks in the bar as well and it was so amazing and I woke up that Sunday and of course I was a little bit hung over but rather than thinking okay I need to I feel guilty I'm gonna restrict myself and I'm gonna go to the gym and burn this all off I woke up and I was like oh do you know what a little bit of movement it's going to make me feel really refreshed and really good it's really going to clear out all of that alcohol and I'm probably going to have a really good leg workout and I did and I came home and I focused on getting in the right nutrition and getting in all the stuff that I know is going to make me feel good because it's the perfect art of balance and I you can't have one without the other but it's also okay to want to explore

wellness and explore fitness and explore nutrition but make sure that it's coming from a positive mindset and a positive place not a place of self-loathing of comparison to others of restriction of self-hate like it's all about self-love so talking about um language being really important see we grew up with the fitspo culture on instagram you touched on it a little bit what was your now looking back at it as a nutritionist what is your opinion on the whole fitzpah culture it's difficult because not everyone is affected in a negative way yeah so some people see something and not be affected by it and some people will be able to calorie count and go on my fitness pal and it'd be so non-offensive and so normalized to them and if

they want a chocolate biscuit they're going to have a chocolate biscuit and not feel guilty about it I think it's up to us and we have a responsibility to navigate what we are exposed to in our lives we have the choice now and we actually have the privilege of choice that we choose who we follow we choose what we see we choose who we engage with so if you don't like that or if you don't like something that someone's putting out just unfollow it like you don't have to have that exposure every single day and if you fill up your your world and your social pages with things that inspire you and genuinely motivate you your life and your wellness journey is going to be so like a much

happier place because we have those influencers out there nowadays we're so lucky we have so many incredible content creators who are out there being authentic and genuine and and putting out incredible content that is really useful like if I want to glow grow my glutes and have a laugh about it I'll follow Harriet Hopper fitness if I want to just look at gym culture and laugh like there are just there are just so many fantastic fitness influences that aren't always about hey here's my 28 slim down guide to prep for summer it's more than that now and I actually do think it was a short phase and it's something that we're both exposed to but now I actually think we're really lucky that we have the choice of so many different journeys when it comes to fitness yeah I think it's really important to reiterate that element of choice

you were talking about because a lot of the inspo girls I follow now talk about things like during their luteal phase how they can't do a pull-up yeah um and or like how they used to like a different phase of the cycle so it is it is really nice but I think it's hard because even now with these people it's you're still getting an influx of confusing messages in mainstream media about what is and isn't good for us and sometimes I sit there and I'm wondering like is what I'm eating good for me is this bad for me like I think I even read once that drinking water was bad for you I mean everything's gonna kill you apparently and I always tell people don't over complicate it if you want to get into the nitty-gritty of things and jump in an ice bath in the morning and and practice Wim Hof breathing a hundred percent

go for it it's your body it's your wellness journey you can do that but if you're finding that you're getting stressed and overwhelmed by it just cut it back like it's really really simple no food is good or bad everything in moderation try and have more of the good stuff that you actually know is good for you like your veggies your whole grains your legumes and pulses your extra virgin olive oil your avocados nuts and seeds all the things that we just know categorically are good for you but if you want dairy milk over 70 dark chocolate the bar of dairy milk is not going to damage your health it's not going to kill you it's not going to harm you it's not going to harm you. It's not going to give you a million spots. But rather think of your overall patterns and behaviors throughout the week rather than just singular moments. And I think what happens is we get so obsessed that we narrow down our line of sight to every single decision we make.

And that's where it gets really stressful and overwhelming. Because then you're sitting in M&S looking for your meal deal you're over analyzing every single option and it becomes this bombardment of information what's right or wrong whereas if i think okay i'm going to meal prep a few of my lunches from monday to wednesday i've got dinner out on that thursday and like it's all about the accumulation of habits and and balance throughout the week that is the most important thing not just those micro decisions that we make every single day is that is this mindset that you've got now something that you've learned from therapy or does it mainly come from I think it's a bit of both I think that's why there aren't actually that many nutritionists

out there like me I think a lot of nutritionists are very black and white and they detach nutrition from the meal that's on our plate and that's why you see a lot of nutritionist posts I have this bit here and this bit here and that's a source of this and blah blah where I like to encourage people to think about their food identity what does food mean to them what's their culture in food and how can we make sure that we're getting in all of the good stuff that we know is essential and that we need but in a very normalized way i still want people to eat food we don't eat nutrients we eat pie we eat a bowl of pasta we eat lasagna exactly and it's like how can we hybrid the world of nutrition and wellness with the world of delicious food and that's the barrier that I think I've crossed and I think that's why everything like it's growing so quickly because

I tell people hey I'm making lasagna but it's a super green lasagna because I'm going to sneak loads of different veggies and fiber types and gut feeding prebiotics in there. And I'm not going to lecture you about it. I'm just going to tell you, like, here's the recipe. You make it. It's delicious, but it's also nourishing and good for you. And it makes you feel good because you feel like you're doing something good to your body. But it also makes you feel good because you're eating something that you actually enjoy. You don't sit there with something you feel like you're doing something good to your body but it also makes you feel good because you're eating something that you actually enjoy you don't sit there with something you're like oh I'm I'm a wellness girl and here I am eating something that I don't actually love and all I really really want right now is a hot Swedish meatball wrap from Pret it's it's about

finding the foods that you genuinely enjoy but that are also good for you yeah I think it's um it's like we first met at a wellness event and even though you're a nutritionist everyone automatically assumes that's food as opposed to like overall wellness when it comes to your lifestyle I think the session you led I still have the notebook at home but it was like you know what other habits can you do that would benefit you outside of what you eat yeah and I think people forget that additional stuff outside of wellness because I didn't even take into consideration how my mental health impacted my cravings or what I felt like I needed nutritionally and it's a really mature

way you've taken about it to actually say I need help I need therapy yeah um and you know I was having conversations with friends and things about what finding a therapist is like and I feel like not many people talk about like the relationship you can build with your therapist or you need to build with your therapist especially if you're letting them into something as vulnerable as an eating disorder yeah um what was that journey like for you so I've actually always been really lucky with my therapist I've had two therapists in my life my first therapist Jane we specialized obviously in the more eating disorder side of things she'd actually suffered um with her own

eating disorder so I felt like it was someone who understood me because it's a very weird thing because people are like well why can't you just eat it why are you bothered about being skinny but it was so much more than that it was this controllive obsessive like incredibly OCD addictive style of eating and we practice a lot of CBT and I remember just the first time I sat down in the room with her I know when my therapist is is right when I feel comfortable enough to cry so I normally feel very uncomfortable crying in front of people that I don't know I feel like I really close up and I go very insular and and I just don't really give a lot of myself and the first session with Jane I just crumbled and I knew that it was a safe space

in an area that I could express myself and I've only recently started therapy again now I've had a very incredible but turbulent time from when I went to uni to my life now there's been so many huge things that have happened that I haven't really addressed because I've always been the person ever since a little girl that I'm like just get on with it head down brush it under like you're fine you're resilient and I remember having a little wobble recently actually where I felt a little bit burnt out and I felt really lost with who I was and what I wanted from my life and I had all these incredible amazing things happen to me with my career with the social page but reality like deep down I really didn't feel very happy I felt really unfulfilled and I just went on google and I had a flick around and I looked

about who was local because I wanted to see them in person I personally like to see people face to face I think it has quite a strong connection in that sense I feel like I can share more especially because I live so much of my life on the phone on the laptop I need that almost human connection yeah and I found someone she kind of looks like me but a little bit older than me um she could be she kind of looks like slightly like my mom um but I remember walking in it probably took me two or three sessions until I cried and as soon as I cried and I felt that break of almost where I just sank back a little bit into those sessions I knew that she was the right person but as you said it's like a relationship it's like a friendship you don't meet every single person when you're out and about and think wow

you're gonna be my best friend yeah you have to you know deep down inside if you feel like you're comfortable sharing your deepest darkest insecurities and secrets because the reality is that is the person you're gonna do that with yeah and I think it's like I've always explained it as like dating yeah um and people like think that if they meet somebody like if they meet a therapist and they don't gel well with them therapy's not for them is therapy's for everyone everyone um anybody with a pulse can benefit from therapy it's whether you are committed to your mental health as you should be yeah in taking on that journey and meeting somebody what would you say to somebody who is probably listening and think that they are struggling with their relationship with food or like needing that element of control in their life?

Seek therapy because you need someone who isn't too close to home. You need someone who truly can help you navigate and understand what you're feeling, who you really really are what you really want and break free of I we used to call it the chimp me and Jane and it was like the chimp with the two symbols that would clash and I learned to distinguish my own internal voice with the chimp's voice so when I would look at something and that little voice in the back of your head would say shouldn't have that oh that's too much or oh my goodness how many calories is that I would instantly think of the clashing chimp and I would be able to identify that thought so vividly and be like you are not my voice you are another voice you are the chimp speaking do I want that

yes and being able to filter through that negative inner self-talk is something that even to this day I still have to practice because we are all vulnerable and we all have an inner critic some people's inner critics are just louder than others but learning to understand that just because it's coming from your head doesn't mean it's your own voice I think it's one of those things I think it's a massive step to kind of admit to yourself that you know what you're experiencing or what you're feeling and thinking isn't right and it's it is a brave thing to to come out and say something that you need help but you aren't alone in it and there are other people that have experienced it as well

so I think it is it is really important um what do you think 27 year old you would say to that 17 year old Emily it's funny because we do this I do this quite a lot in therapy where I talk to the younger version of me. And I always just say to her, you're brave, you're resilient, you're amazing. And you need to trust in yourself that you can do this journey. Because I actually, it's going to make me a little bit emotional. No actually it's gonna make me a little emotional but no it's okay it's like a therapy session I'm actually so proud of myself because there's been so many things that have happened in my life that I almost like I I fought and I battled to be where I am and to be the person that I am

and I couldn't have done it without the help of these amazing like I could have done it without the help of these amazing women who have guided me through myself and get therapy it's kind of nice as well because I feel like it's a bit of a full circle moment when I look at your social media I find comfort in being able to eat what I want but be good about it as well and you know it's it's kind of nice you're doing that for other people as well um sorry I didn't want to you got me on a sensitive day I'll click clearly i feel comfortable enough to cry with you do you know what it is oh don't worry it's my ill dry it's it's a really weird thing that skill that i have for some reason people feel very comfortable in telling me a lot of things yeah so people that i don't necessarily have a very close relationship with will tell me all sorts of stuff oh god here you go what do you want to hear where my trauma came from

to be fair it's very like my management say it's me all the time it's a very are we are we are we streaming concealer lines it's something that people say to me it's a very weird thing that I draw from people I'm sorry I didn't mean to be a therapist I do you know what if I ever decided that I wanted a career change I actually think it would be something I would be good at but um I did put a question box on Instagram and surprisingly every single question was about hormonal eating and feeding and I feel like there's always that stigma online when like I saw a graph the other day about women's hormonal levels versus a man's hormonal levels and men have up down for every single day whereas women have like all these hormones and they are

all over the place and i couldn't even remember all of them if i wanted to um and that stigma and shame about when she's on a period she just wants to eat loads of chocolate and stuff like that and i think people want to understand a little bit more like how do they know what is right for their body at the right time of their hormonal cycle yeah the biggest thing that i tell people is that your hunger fluctuates with your cycle and a lot of people have this almost like resistance against oh i feel really hungry today but i shouldn't eat on the run-up to your period your metabolism increases to the point where you need to include an extra snack in your day or you need to have slightly larger portions because your body needs

that extra fuel to kind of gear you up for your period and I think being in sync and being aware of how your hormones affect things like your appetite and your cravings can really help just demystify why you're feeling the way that you're feeling and intuitive eating is a funny area because I think it can be very confusing for a lot of people a lot of people say I want to be intuitive but I inhale a pack of digestive biscuits because I can't stop eating them yeah so it's a balance between educating yourself about your female body when your when your appetite is going to be at its greatest how to work out and what types of workouts to do around your cycle and I feel that just gives a little bit more empowerment for yourself and honoring your hunger making sure you're getting in the right nutrition and

nutrients around your cycle but if you find that's another layer of additional something that's just going to stress you out then just focus on the balanced eating front and if you are a little bit more hungry include an extra snack like it doesn't have to be you don't have to understand your hormones and your nutrition and your fitness you can still be healthy but just doing it on like a more general front but if it is something that interests you it's actually a really really fascinating area for females and it does make a big difference it is something that you can have an impact for when it comes to to your wellness and it's great to actually see a lot of people talking about it nowadays because so much of research and evidence is

is based on men and a lot of the the female side of things like it's never really published in a lot of peer-reviewed studies because it's so much more complicated and we don't often see the results and the uh the kind of definitive outcomes from studies as we do in in men compared to females yeah it's like i um well 18 months ago removed myself from hormonal contraception which meant i had to force myself to learn about my cycle but it wasn't until i started following certain accounts on social media that i actually realized it could impact hunger um your ability to work out and what types of workouts you should do I remember getting so angry that I couldn't do what I could do last week yeah why can't I do it and I would get upset and visibly emotional at the gym and then all these men around me be like this girl's

crazy but it's it's one of those things that, like you said, is interesting for me, but you know, your body's very good at telling you what it needs. A hundred percent, a hundred percent. And it's one of those things as well. It's your, as soon as you relax into trusting yourself and trusting your body, everything becomes so much simpler.

And I think so much of what goes wrong when we get confused and we get stressed is because we don't trust ourselves we don't trust our body to eat what it needs no know when to stop understand it's it's hunger cues and not trusting yourself I think that's horrible like you that is not a position that you want to be in so kind of insulting to your own brain isn't it a hundred percent and that's why like don't get wrapped up in that negative self-talk don't get wrapped up in in thinking that the chimp's voice is your own and don't get wrapped up in just this comparison for wanting to be someone else like you are amazing you deserve the best and you deserve to be nourished thriving and feeling energized but also having the freedom to actually do what you want to do

like you have one life and you have you live in one head so make it a nice place to live exactly and if you ever need nice food in Spokane because I used to get so sick of looking at boiled chicken brown rice and broccoli and I was so glad to see colourful food on my my Instagram home page every time you post something on there um I wanted to ask you what would you say to people that you know all those people that made comments about your body what would you say to them if you could say something to them now if you wouldn't say it to someone that you really loved like your daughter or your mum don't say it like you do not deserve to comment on anyone else's body in a negative way with to fit your own ideals of what you think that person

should look like because they're free to do whatever the hell they want with their own body and i think that's um that's the amazing part about um everybody's bodies being so diverse if everybody looked the same it'd be a very boring planet we need to remember that and like I think it's one of the nicest messages I think I've taken away from this episode is that you know to learn to trust yourself learn to trust what your body's telling you and that it is okay if you need a break or you need to eat more or you feel like you need to go out and enjoy yourself um I'm really sorry that I made you cry no it's great it was near the end anyway so uh I'm not doing too bad but no honestly um thank you so much you know what thank you so much for everything you post I know it's just out of your enjoyment and you fell into it by accident

but I really enjoy it I've learned so much from you and I wish you were there when I was a teenager because I would have benefited so much from that but thank you so much for coming no thank you for having me. When I could hear it, I was like, no, no. I feel so bad because I hate making people cry. Normally I don't crack. You just realized your business needed to hire someone yesterday. How can you find amazing candidates fast? Easy, just use Indeed.

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