God Awful Movies - 253: The Cokeville Miracle

Episode Date: June 23, 2020

This week, Michael Marshall joins us for an atheist review of The Cokeville Miracle; a movie that will try to sell the bombing of an elementary school as a miracle, even though the only miraculous thing is that we managed to find jokes to tell about it. --- If you’d like to make a per episode donation and get monthly bonus episodes, please check us out on Patreon: http://patreon.com/godawful Check out our other shows, The Scathing Atheist, The Skepticrat, Citation Needed, and D&D Minus. Our theme music is written and performed by Ryan Slotnick of Evil Giraffes on Mars. If you’d like to hear more, check out their Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/EvilGiraffesOnMars/?fref=ts All our other music was written and performed by Morgan Clarke. To hear more from him, check him out here: https://www.morganclarkemusic.com/ --- Check out more from Marsh on Be Reasonable and Skeptics with a K

The mayor turns to the dispatcher and lady and says, you better let the clergy know too. Yeah, fuck you. Get out of here. They shine a big cross sign in the air like Batman and all the British are. Because if anybody is an expert in the trapping and coercing of children. If you're a kid, you know, they can just talk through their own personal experience. Oh no, they can escape in lots of different ways. Here's a list of 15 ways to have a escape. Could escape. God awful. Movie.

Movie. OOVIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII It left is my good friend Heath and right heath. Welcome back. Thanks Noah. So you know what's the biggest problem with atheism? What's that? It's outsized influence in Wyoming police department Christian Lives Matter will get there. It's not fair. The movie we're gonna connect those fucking dots They're gonna use Donald Trump's Sharpie and connect those dots. I promise. And those are the only dots they will connect. Yeah. Now, we've run out of pre-recorded stuff, so there's no Eli today. He's still training his understudy, but we're pleased to welcome back the host to be reasonable. Co-host of Skeptics with the K and the project director for the good

thinking society. Michael Marshall Marsh. Welcome back, sir. Hey, thanks so much for having me back, guys. Thank you for making me watch this and thank you for making me watch this film first. So I was the first one of the three of us to figure out what was going on with this film. Thanks for that Jesus. I just did radio silence. I knew what was happening the whole time. It was delightful to watch. All right, so tell us, Heath, what will we be breaking down today?

We watched the Cokeville Miracle. It's the story of an elementary school bombing. Yeah, it is, but that has the word miracle in it. In the title, it's trolling for Columbine, the Christmas moon. The Mormon music. The Mormon music technically. Yeah, no technically, because it is still Mormon movie month. And Marsh, how bad was this movie?

And if you could, like a high pitched well at the beginning would be great. Well, if you want to hear how God works in mysterious ways, but first you need to sit through an hour of made for TV reconstruction of a real life terrorist attack You will love this movie. Well, it's like it's like if Shinda's list had ended with a rainbow appearing over our shwits That's what the Yes Yes, so okay to be clear We got like two thirds of the way through this movie messaging back up where Mars is going like guys

I don't know if this is gonna work and I don guys, I don't know if this is going to work. And I don't know if I have time to watch a whole nother fucking movie. Do you guys have like a music video you want to review or something? But then eventually you get to act three and you're like, oh, this makes so much sense. Now, if the hadn't been for that act three, we would have been doing God awful gifts right now. That's the only thing out of that time left to do. This feels insensitive.

Can we watch like, I don't know, info wars episode about New Town or something? I feel like this one. This isn't right for us. All right. So is there anything you guys want to nominate this one for me the best to be the worst at? Yeah. Best, best. Little kids harassing a terrorist.

Oh, I love that little girl. So God damn much. They are fucking delightful. This movie had no idea, but it was hilarious at a bunch of different points. We spend a good amount of time in a hostage situation, again, at an elementary school. And these little kids just roast the bad guys the bad guys. It's so good.

They almost foil his whole plot with like, not touching can't get mad like that. He gets frustrated. It's the greatest. Because they're not touching. Yeah, I know. No, they didn't. They did not touch you can't get mad. It's true.

That's the rule. It's the thing. I left a bunch during this movie again, about a terrorist at an elementary school. Think about that. That's comic genius. No, I didn't even realize what they did. It is. So I'm going to, we've already alluded to this, of course, but I'm going to go with best worst gamma selection. And I'm starting to think he light does this on purpose, right? Because he writes the calendar. He knows what he's going to be away. He think he like does this on purpose right because he writes the calendar

He knows what he's gonna be away. He knows he was gonna have a fucking kid for this one and it seems like every time He knows he's gonna be away. We ended with some terrible selection where we have to write fucking jokes about exploding kindergarteners now I want to tell you upfront. This is a story where no children die, right? The only people who die in this story are the bad guy terrorists, but the fact that I have to tell you that up front really tells you what a game appropriate movie we're talking about, right? Jesus, when the fucking warning at the beginning is, okay, no kids are gonna die. That's usually not one of our movies.

In fairness to Elon, though, I feel like the subject of exploding kindergarteners was tre- like he doesn't want to miss this one in some sense. It was squalian his wheelhouse this one. That's right. Yeah. So I want to say best worst protagonist and protagonist is with the upward inflection, because I'm not convinced that the main guy in this is the protagonist in this film because our main character spends the vast majority of this film two hours away in a car. And it's like if you were watching Die Hard,

but if John McCain had spent the entire film commuting to the Nakatormi Plaza. Right, yeah, you just gotta keep gun to him and go on, well, this traffic is shit and I can't get out of the one-on-one. Yeah, right, no, the just gotta keep gun to him and go on well this traffic is shit And I can't get on the one on one. Yeah, right no the fucking preview for this movie might as well go But there's only one me oh hold on he's on break We cut to him and he's not even in his car. He's like in 7-Eleven when they're trying to contact me. Yeah, right. He's not even there now

I'm the trying to contact you. Yeah, that's right, right. He's not even there now. Ha ha ha ha. All right, well I'll tell you what, there's a lot of child hostages to try to pick jokes about on the other side of this prank. So we're going to need to take a second, but when we come back, we're going to dive into all the mysterious ways that are the Cokeville miracle. So how are you even listening to Handling the Whole Stay in Play stuff?

Oh, you know, we're managing a lot of board games. How are you even loosened a handle in the whole stay in place stuff? Oh, you know we're managing a lot of board games. How you guys doing? Yeah, same good days and bad, really. What about you, Heath? Time of my life. Really? Yeah, never been happier. Wow, so what's your secret? Oh, two words, Marsh. Sex toys. It's like Adam and Eve says, the best part of staying at home is playing at home.

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Hey, everybody. I'm TC Christensen, the world-renowned Mormon filmmaker. I'm sure you already knew that. Welcome to our first writer's room meeting. Ha! I'm scrimmagef'd. Okay. It's time to spread the LDS gospel. It's all get excited. Bully! Quits and pedals. Right. Okay, so we got a great idea for a movie called The Cokeville Miracle.

Wait, wait, I'm sorry. Are you talking about Cokeville Wyoming? Cokeville Wyoming, yeah. Yeah. Where an elementary school got bombed. Exactly, yep. And you want to call the barming of an elementary school a miracle. A miracle? Well, yeah, I see what you're doing.

But no, it's a story about God's plan. None of the kids died. Well, right, right. But they were all part of a hostage situation with a bomb. I mean, a bunch of those kids have got severe PTSD. That's not a real thing. Oh, super, super, super, super real. You have an idiot. I'm a greed disagree. But you get it, right?

Like you get what I'm doing, you know, like the Lord works in mysterious ways. That's what we always say. Well, yeah, but not in a positive way. I mean, that's just a thing that we say when we're losing arguments to atheists Oh It is I thought I was like serious. No, it's cool. No, okay. Well whatever Just just for the record the shack was about a dead kid and it made 97 million dollars at the box office glory B tickety boo!

That can't be real. Okay, yeah, you keep saying stuff like that. There's no way that last one was a real British saying. Tickety boo is absolutely a real, but you're saying. No fucking way. And we're back for the breakdown. We're gonna open up on some small town Wyoming-ness. Mm-hmm.

Right? Yeah, we get a cold open on this like sad yoga group in Wyoming somewhere. Right. And then what is that? I don't know. Here's my only theory. Seconds later, it was like nope, the yoga was just a warm up for the movie. Now it's time for a warm open on police sirens at a terrible, terrible death of a child or something like that. It's like they wanted to like a do over, right?

Yeah. Yeah. So we get this bucolic opening. It says based on a true story and I almost should have like parentheses below that says, or God would have done a better job on the miracle. I mean, it should have said based on true story brackets, well, the first hour anyway. Everything out of act three, not so much. Yeah. But then, yeah, but then the movie calls him Mulligan and it's like, no, no, you know, what? We want to go dark for the opening. So we start at this hotel murder scene or something that we will never learn anything about. Nope, nope. Just we just are, uh, quote unquote protagonist, just in a

room that was so bad. I missed a ticket for he's apartment, but then I saw the table lamp there so it couldn't have been. It was right. Yeah. No, exactly. It had been decorated. The murder there is different. Yeah. So redneck deputy A wants to walks up to redneck deputy B who will be our absentee protagonist. And he goes like, Hey, man, you okay? And he's like, yeah, we're never really going to fill in the details of this. But it sure will have me questioning the existence of God later in the film. Yeah, I'm really having a problem of evil, Frank. I don't know. Is that a thing?

I feel like I'm today. Frank's like, no, just maybe later in the movie, just pump the brakes. Yeah. All right, so now we flash over to our villain. He is trying out his new bomb design in Arizona. Now I'm telling you that if you were watching the movie, what you'd know is you're looking at a black fucking screen.

Yeah, my first note in the scene is I can't see the movie. And then I was like, what's happening? Is the movie shy? We've had like four bucks at this. Yeah, it's a movie. Just start your fucking movie. It's like, it's like a, the movie's a little kid afraid to go off the diving board. You want to start your movie? No.

You have to coax it out. Okay. Let the other movies go past you. Yeah. Yeah. Right. So, and so we get the woman walks up to the student who's who's about to blow up this bomb. And she says, what is it going to work? And goes, all you need to know is to be air will burn. And I'm like, yeah, that's what fire is, right? Like a burning air is fire.

But he blows up a school bus. Now they can't afford to do that. So they poorly CGI it instead. Oh, no, the CGI is amazing. And every time we see fire throughout this entire film, it's that bad CGI to a point where I thought, if at any point one of the bad guys smokes, they'd probably CGI in the life of I. If you see it, if you want me, well, we paid for the after effect.

We might as well get our full use out of this fire after effect. Right, so yeah, exactly. So to an uneducated person who didn't realize this was CGI, paid for the after effect. We might as well get our full use out of this fire after effects. Right. So yeah, exactly. So to an uneducated person who didn't realize this was CGI, you wait, might assume that he had shot this fucking bus with a missile of some sort. But no, it was a homemade bomb. It was a homemade bomb that was on a string. It was a tat his remote bomb was attached by a long wire.

And he says trial number four, absolute perfection. And I think if you've got to bomb something while still being attached to it with a wire, that is not perfection by my definition of what I'm doing. Perfect, Bob. If you've got me that close to it, you've not really, you basically fact this school bus to make it blow up by this. You buy that from Acme, you know this this is gonna go out like you have to know. Also, yeah. And speaking of the note about how this was working to perfection, he's saying this, I should point out into this gigantic, comically enormous, even for the time this was supposed

to have happened tape recorder, right? Yeah, he's got that straight from his ZX spectrum. That's what he's used. Yeah. Unreal. All right. So now we cut back to Wyoming, where a family is family, and this is protagonist family, and he sure is a good dad. And not when he's supposed to be, you know, responding to police calls at the elementary school. But when he said, you know, when a story time, he's good.

But so, but this is where we have to introduce the doubts about God, right? This is, it's time for family prayer, but Dad can't say the prayer because he's not really sure about this whole Jesus thing. Yeah, and if it's just can't say the words of prayers because it makes like our tongue bleeds or something, that's coming up to the tongue. It's, we got to avoid that at all costs. Also, his daughter, his daughter, Cindy opens the prayer by saying, dear God, thank you for everything in the world. It's like Cindy, we've just seen a guy, facts explored a bus.

You might want to leave him out of the family. You can be a bit more specific about what you're thanking God for. Everything in the world. So, okay. Now, we get one of these weird moments where, I don't know about you guys, but I looked up this true story and got some details on it before we went into the movie.

So I knew things like the fact that like this shopping cart that he's about to buy would be the basis of his bomb. Yeah, I had not looked that up and I was baffled by this bit. I didn't look this up until made way through the film once the details started getting worse and worse, I was like, I wonder which details I'm actually allowed

to point out are ridiculous. Oh, no, those ones were real, okay, okay. I'm not gonna say that about him, but yeah, so this whole shopping cart thing just completely threw me. Well, the movie was confused by this too. Like, his accomplice didn't look it up either and was like, are we using a shopping cart for our?

Well, and we say shopping cart. Look, it's one of those little, like, you know, it's like the old lady dragon two bags of shit back to her apartment in the Bronx carts, right? Like it's not a full shopping cart. And they're trying to make it look ominous because it will be the basis of the bomb. But it's just one of those little shitty wire shopping carts

bouncing around in a parking lot. That's what we're really looking at. Here's to stop and like adjust the way it's squeaky. It's a little bit off too. It's a little bit different. One is different height. And here's a conference. I don't it doesn't surprise me that she didn't question why he needed the shopping cart or look up in the details because she makes some very strange choices all the way through. For example, in this scene, she's wearing a full canoe dangling from each year, which was a very bold fashion choice.

Yeah, her motivations get weird as we go. He also tells her off for asking questions. He's like, what have I told you about asking questions? And I genuinely couldn't tell if that's because he's the bad guy or because he's a Mormon, and it's just, we don't allow you off your type to ask questions. The men do the questions around here. Yeah, it's both.

And I did think as well this being a Mormon kind of film, I thought fair play for them, because normally the Mormons like to hide their historic links to terrorism, but they just put in these terrorist links right out there in this. Ha ha ha. All right, so now we've got to school in Wyoming, that's the school day starting.

And I guess you know, like we when you were a kid, you know, friends come over or whatever in your family with like getting into an argument or there would be something embarrassing, like some family ritual or something. That's how I felt knowing that Mars was watching this scene that opens with kids saying the pledge of allegiance. Oh, yeah. So like, for me, the only thing creepier than having to have your country's flag

in every single classroom. It sounds like something that if you described North Korea doing that, most Americans would think, that's pretty weird. No, you've got it in all of your classrooms. The only thing weird in that is having all the kids chant in unison a pledge of allegiance to that flag while one of them holds that flag.

It is psychotic to watch this. Wait, Mars, you don't have that in the UK? No. Like, how do you know what country you're hiring? Well, that's because in all British classrooms, we've got a map of the world, which not only has us on it, but has all of the bits that we used to own by stealing it from people around the world. And that's a pretty colorful map by this point. So we're very, very acquainted with the world because we had to know where our territory used to end.

So yeah, we all know these things. We won't learn a lot about them, but we do know them. Yeah, right, right, yeah, exactly. Okay, and we're also going to meet this little kid Jason. His job will be to be, you know, really dumb and then eventually stare down the terrorists, right? And this kid Jason, he looks like if Michael J. Fox cloned himself, but only after the shaking started. So we're in the middle of this class and the, there's a fire alarm, right? And they start walking the kids out and the principal is messing with the fire alarm.

And he's like, well, it's darn viral. Our never works properly. And I'm like, holy shit, what a serious problem. Yeah, but they have no idea. They have no idea. The principal's talking to like the janitor guy or something. He's like, is this like a real fire alarm? Or do we have any?

No, no, no, just does that sometimes. What have? Yeah, it's fine. It's like the light on my dashboard. No, no, no, the tires are fine. Yeah, with the fire alarm with the children. Yeah, right. Exactly.

I think we'll look back at this moment and laugh. Nah, nah, that is fine. That's fine. And then we have to go back to our bad guy, and we have to double down on the ominous bomb parts that we don't know our bomb parts yet. This is the scenery ominously dumps out milk, right? Yeah, and then he starts giving his partner shit

because he's out of milk. And like, she could just look three inches to her left and see a sink full of milk. And be like, I think, I think I know where the milk went made. It's not helpful. It's pretty clear what's gone. But now because she's so stupid and so bad in this film, she doesn't even question that. Yeah. And just drink your coffee black like a grown up like whatever. Relax. To angry about this milk slight from his wife accomplished, yeah. And again, the reason is because he needed a gallon, not a half gallon to keep the gasoline for his bomb in and she got the wrong size, but they don't tell you that.

So you're just like, well, have a snack other than Captain Crunch you ass. All I did not get that at all. Cause later he does get another milk carton, but he gets it from the dump. And so I just thought this was just him being shitty to her to establish him being shitty. I didn't even put those pieces together. Fuck me. This film's really bad. It's doing its job. It's really important. You can't get milk jugs except at the dump or in your fridge. So it's fucking up his plan. Um, can we talk about one other thing in the scene? One other detail?

Oh, yes, yes, please do. Please do, please do. Okay. So this guy, there, I knew this is gonna pass you off so bad. I was fucking furious. They're about to establish that he's like a math genius, bomb expert guy. He's also a math genius bomb expert guy.

He's also former law enforcement with finance. I can so he's working on his bomb stuff or something. And there's a piece of paper like a notepad with math on it. And I was like, all right, I'm fucking pausing that. That's gonna be priceless. He's got he's he's got the integral from zero to infinity of e to the negative x squared. That's it though. That's like the entire and he has a calculator next to that not a graphing calculator.

It's like an old timey calculator. So I'm thinking myself like, why would he need to know that limp like that integral? What how is the area under that curve useful? That way the calculator doesn't make sense and then at the very bottom of the page There's just some stuff you can't really see there's like two other steps and then at the bottom just Hi He did circle to be so that we that I could not stop thinking about this. It's really important to circle pie when you're going to try and make facts bombs. It's really important. It's not just pie. You've got a circle it as well.

Well, you and it has to be an exact circle. Right. Yeah, exactly. It doesn't make any fucking sense. And the integral is radical pie over two. Wait, he might, I don't know how he got from that to just pie by, he was just like, pie, that's a cool math. You number. That's the answer. So fucking. But I couldn't know how he got from that to just pie by, he was just like, pie, that's a cool math you number. That's the answer. So, but I couldn't stop thinking about this. Like, did I learn to build a bomb in high school? I wasn't aware of the teaching as that.

Oh, and then this is also the moment where you like calls as accomplices, apparently his unwitting accomplices as we'll learn in gruesome, we don't want to get sued levels of detail. Yeah, and it's fair to say that his accomplices who survived this film are shown throughout this film to be entirely innocent. And I'm sure those two facts are completely related. Or the ones who are still alive, yeah, no, they're nothing to do with it. Yeah, right, right. Very clear on that fact. Well, in it's in it to a comical degree. We'll get to it later, but to a comical degree, they have to establish that no, none of these people knew anything at all

with bad was happening because clearly those people wouldn't cooperate with the making of the film and last they do. Anyway, yeah, it's really funny. We'll get there. But they clearly do because he calls up one of the other guys and he's like screaming eagle. This is black sparrow. We're doing, we're doing the bomb now of the elementary school and the guy's like, dude, you're, you're doing the code wrong. You did the code at the beginning and then you just said bomb, talk in the code man. Yeah.

All right. So now we cut to protagonist, dropping his kids off at church, but he can't go in because he's having his existential atheism crisis and would burn if he walked beyond those doors, right? Yeah, and I love how he says to her that, you know, his whole reason for not going in is problem of evil. And she responds to that by silently walking away.

She did nothing, absolutely. Not even a jingle of keys. It's like, no, walk away. She's like, well, motherfucker, you have the keys because you're driving. God damn it. That's not fair. So, okay, and then we have to meet teen daughter.

Now, I love teen daughter. She's the best character in this movie, best actor in this movie. Because what she'll do is she's the terrorist's daughter, right? Yeah. And she is just going to sit in the back seat, shitting on his terrorism plan for the first third of this movie. Yeah, she's pretty great. I also had down that she looks like Mom and Miley Cyrus.

She's, she's Hannah Utah. And also, by the way, if I'm not mistaken, this actress was 23 years old when they filmed this. I'm pretty sure she was. Yeah. All right. So now they drive up to Wyoming, right? The terrorists do.

They're in this little motel and it's time for the accomplices who have absolutely no guilt whatsoever to show up. And they show up going like, oh, we can't wait to see what surprise thing that we don't know about. We invested money in. David, can you tell us? Right. About the thing. But first he's like, shut up, shut up. I'm just finishing something. Okay, got it. I've proven mathematically that I am immortal and I can go in and out of death and life. And they're like, what man? No. No. Oh, there's so much about this that I love. I love the fact that when they burst in on him doing this,

he's playing the calculator like a concert pianist. It's just like, tata tata tata tata tata. He's right there. Exactly. And he's managed to type some e numbers into this cheap 19 year he's calculated that he's become immortal. And I was wondering, did he put in like the Konami code

in the guy, the Calcutta code? Is that what he's calculated that he's become immortal. And I was wondering, did he put in the canami code in the Calcutta code? Is that what he's done there? Fuck, there's not a B. I'm using A to Z B. It's cool, it's good. And he explains this to his compasses. Like, I figured out, I've proven mathematically how I can become immortal.

And they're like, yeah, that's great. But what's your big idea? It's like, sorry, was resurrection not a big enough idea? Yeah, right. I feel like we can stop there. I just, I love the look on the guy's face. Where he's like, yeah, no, I just figured out with this calculator, how I can die and come back to life.

And they're like, well, wish you had told a step before we invest it in your thing. Does your plan involve having to know how to do that? All of us or? No, but it's plan and and and here's this is also a red flag for the investors in the audience who might find themselves roped into a scheme that they don't know the details of when you ask the person that you invested your money with to show them what you invested in and they start Set and shit on fire to show you how flame it gets. It's time to get the fuck out. You know, so he's like, I'm not going to tell you the entire business plan, but here's a bunch of flower I'm going to light on fire. But yeah, he says, what's

the big idea? He throws flower up in the air, lights it and says that times a million, still not an idea mate, that is not an idea, that's not more of a flower. This but more thought is not a business plan. So no, but that, Lily, let me get my calculator, times one million. Oh, there's not enough spaces. Okay, times. Okay. And then we get the first of many of those just shoehorned in bullshit, we sure are innocent lines where the one guy goes, are we going to go into the fireworks business? And David, the bad guy doesn't say yes, or anything. No, right? And they're just like fireworks business. Woohoo. No, but the accomplice wife is like the air will burn. And he's like, okay, just first of all, that's that's my thing. I thought we

start like I was. My things, the arrow will burn. Also, everybody don't listen to her. She's, she made it weird with the tone. It's not it is the fire. We're doing fireworks. It's gonna be great. It's gonna be great. Now, like, okay, fireworks and math and mortality. Yeah. Yeah, here's a check. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, and the next check. Yeah, a check. Yep. Oh, and the next thing we do the exact same, shit again, right? So this is where the scene where they're painting the windows of the van, right?

Yeah, and he's full on Mr. Miyagi and his daughter when he's like, all the way up to our son. Yeah, and she's like very reasonably, hey, dad, why are we painting up the windows of our minivan? And he's like, not terrorism. And she's like, okay, okay, no, it feels like it's clearly terrorism.

I don't know, you just will the air, but the air will burn. See, okay, that's what I'm talking about. You do that a lot. Yeah. And of course, the dumbass completely innocent accomplices are standing there off to the side talking to each other going I bet we have to paint the windows to keep the fireworks cooled down, huh We sure are innocent Yeah, I love how it makes sense

They are it's amazing I felt genuinely bad that they didn't go into the fireworks business. It's clearly this guy's dream. He's clearly well offered. Yeah. Yeah. So yeah, they load everything up with, you know, the unknown plan that involves guns, flammable powders and blacked out windows. Who knows what it could be? And a squeaky shopping cart.

Yeah. Exactly. No fireworks though. They're like, hey, buddy, where's the fireworks? Okay, no, no, no, I'm sorry. I was asking to be questioned. I'm excited. I'm excited. Going hunting. Are we going hunting for fireworks? So yeah, okay. Now we have to establish that doubting cop is going to be gone for the entire movie, right? Which is very important. obviously incredibly important to what turns out to be the action and his role in that action. Yeah. And I so much of this is fucking hilarious because this is like again based on a true story where obviously everyone who's on the town payroll

Just does whatever the fuck they want and they have to explain that away in the movie, right? So like the cop was days away when this had the only cop in the town was days away. The principal was nowhere near the fucking school. And so they keep having to be like, yes, I'm just going to go and do something normal that has nothing to do with the prostitute. I will be back constantly. So now we're seeing the cop do that, right? He's going to go help his brother with something. Yeah. And then we see the breakfast scene after he's left. Oh, yeah, there's a couple of things about this breakfast scene that do annoy me a little bit. And it's, why is it that in films, kids always leave midwear through breakfast?

Right. This is bad parenting. Like, get them up 10 minutes earlier. So they actually finish their breakfast every single time. And what we hear is some car horns beeping the distance and like, got to go to school now mum. It's like, well, who's taking you to school? We know your dad's out of town. Your mum's here. The school bus hasn't parked outside your house and honked its horn. That's a very inefficient way. Who's taking your children to school? But she's not bothered by that. And she's like, bye, I love you, be safe at school. Don't get hiled hostage by a crazy terrorist. Bye. Yeah. Exactly. God. All right. So the terrorist guy and his

crew, they're on their way to the school. He stops to dictate into that comically large cassette recorder. I looked it up, by the way, the mini cassette that recorder invented in 1967 commercially available and relatively cheap for consumers at this point in history. Okay. Regardless of the size of this thing, which is ridiculous, and we should dwell on it many times. It's absurd. It's the size of the car.

But when will these tapes be useful to like sometime in the future, he thinks he's going to be like, Hey, you guys remember when we did test number 17 Are the bomb powder to kill the other? Nailed it glad I made these tapes. Yeah, and memories And I love as well how like he just like stops in the middle of the role of wholesol that does a tape explain Now I was gonna blow everything up and every else in the comments like wait wait, let's hear him out So let's say what yes, right yeah exactly what the... Yeah, right, yeah, exactly. Exactly, they get it absurd way into this plot before they're like,

hold on a second, man, when you say, bomb an elementary school full of children, do you mean in a violent way or what? You even ask if he's joking, and it's like, I'm gonna kill the children of this very specific school that law classic, come on, that's a legal plan. It's like, okay. We're gonna. Can you tie this in with the fireworks store because I know we're still really doing that. That's definitely. So. All right. So now, baddie is scoping out the school

from a distance, right? The bad guy and the car. And basically, this is a scene to the character in the movie can go like, boy boy this movie sure is about to get going So the van pulls up to the school team girl isn't so sure about this and we see that the two accomplices are handcuffed in the back of the van Which to their credit they were in real life so they probably weren't genuine they were in real life. So they probably weren't genuine. We are accomplices to this thing. And I love this too. As they're leaving the van, the one handcuff guy turns to the main bag eye and he goes, David, is this got anything to do with that backstory? We forgot to mention earlier about how you were the town marshal here in this little small town. Just. And don't say the air will burn the air will. Okay. Okay. David, could

this terrorist atrocity or about to commit to have anything through that massive grudge y'all, y'all currently operating just I'll have to propose nothing to ask you that. So yeah, so okay. So him and his wife and the team daughter are carrying in guns and bombs and of course the team girl is carrying eight rifles. There has to be a better way style, right? Oh, it's the greatest. This was one of the funniest moments in the movie. It was because she's carrying them all so awkwardly, exactly like an infomercial. And he's like, he turns back and looks at her as she drops them on the ground and they

clunk all over the place and like somehow roll away like marbles in all directions. He's like, don't drop the automatic weapon. She's like, sorry, sorry. Is your daughter drop all your guns when you attack her? She's going to have to be a better way. A squeaky shopping cart for the gun. Yeah, right. And then it shows you how he puts his bomb together.

But it goes into such detail on how he made the bomb. It's practically a YouTube tutorial. It really, I could probably make that bomb. You just have to watch this film at this point. Way too much detail. Do you know the integral from zero to one? Of ease, I could describe. But with like a circle around it, I think.

Yeah, it's exactly, it's kind of close. This is the first point at which I figured I realized that the shopping cart was actually a vital ingredient. And I thought, yeah, that makes sense because otherwise he'd have had to like carry the bomb or kind of like scooch it along the ground like he's moving a book curse. That was the trick. So fair play. Yes, he's got it right there. I love that he thought to do that with a bomb but not for the guns, right? Like, come on. I'm gonna need a bag. Yeah, bags exist. All right. So he goes to the principal's office to get like a taking the school hostage hall pass. Yeah. Oh, we've got the receptionist Tina Cook and she is literally, she may as well be humming Lululu doing second. Second he's the best.

It's the best. He walks in and she's like, can I help you? And he's like, hi, yeah, we have a 1030 with this is a bomb and I will murder you all. She's like, oh, all right. Yeah. And the teenage girl realizes what's going on. And she's like, you know what, I'm not doing this. And the dad is like, well, you and then he realizes

that she's the one carrying all the guns. And he's like, can, can leave if you would like to leave. Please set those guns down and you can take the van. I love this because she says, are you crazy? I'm like, yeah, this is the right time to ask this question. Not earlier when he said he was able to mathematically prove he could defeat death.

And not when he was recording a literal manifesto in the middle of the car. That wasn't the time to think, this guy may be on the edge a little bit, and now is your line. Yeah. She's now piecing this together. She was moments ago carrying an arm full of automatic weapons into an elementary school, being like, yeah, this is still probably fireworks. Oh, and there's one single line, that one single line that the terrorist says to the receptionist

that I just loved because he says, so yeah, try and hit me over the head of anything like that and I'll pull this trigger. And I thought that is weirdly specific, the specific, the specifying, try and hit me over the head. And I'm wanting to carry on listing other ways that the secretary might be able to hit him. I'm wanting to do it. Like, if the secretary might be able to with him and what I'm doing. If you wait until I'm looking away and then you put your fist out and then you say,

hey David, have you got a minute? And then I turn my head and look at you and my cheek hits your fist like really hard. I'll pull the trigger in that case too. It's so... Yeah, but we should establish this. So he's got a dead man trigger on his bum. So what he's done,

because we want to like lean into the YouTube tutorial here, is he's got a clothespin that's being held together that would close the circuit. And he's tied a little shim to his wrist. So if his wrist moves away from the clothespin, it'll close the bum. Go off. Right. So if anybody shoots them or grabs them and tries to pull them away from the bum, the bomb explodes. That's obviously integral to the movie. Integrals are also integral. No, that's true. Yeah. As it turns out. So team girl, Halls asked to the first official looking building and runs in screaming help. And of course, it's a little town. So it's

like the fucking police department slash courthouse slash DMV building. And I'm going to go ahead and say, this is the closest any actor in this movie ever comes to pulling it off, right? Yeah, although the script that they give her doesn't really do her any favors, because she goes in and she's yelling, you need to listen to me. Something very bad will happen if you don't listen to me.

We need the police. You need to listen to me. I need to talk to the police. Why won't you get me a police officer? Oh, why? Just say, bomb school done. Like, you're even use the at symbol. So yeah, you could speed it up. But yeah, yeah. So and they're like, are you sure there's a bomb in the school? And she's

like, no, no, look, I brought handcuffed guys as evidence, right? Which makes the way she was driving earlier, all the funnier, to think that those guys were rolling around in the back. I get the urgency. But yeah, all right. So we start off with the, the effort, I guess they got to gather all of the kids into one classroom here. So we start off in this class with this teacher reading Goldilocks on the three bears

to this again. The terrorist shows up and he's like excuse me I have a bomb and She's scolds him. Yeah, like a teacher. It's the best. She's like this is my classroom. You are getting a time out I'm a grown up also again terrorist with a bomb. So, you know, what I say? She's like, oh, okay, you know what, solid point with Tron. And then we see how terrible the security in this school, and I would think in schools in general really is because this is the part where like,

lady terrorist just goes to all the classrooms and says, hey guys, everybody gather up in one classroom. All right, I'm a grown-up, so you have to do what I say. And even the teachers are like, well, she is a grown-up. That's infuriating. She burst into one classroom, and the class has been taught by basically an aged Courtney Cox.

And she says, follow me, I've got a surprise for you. And the teacher to this strange in the school says, oh, what kind of surprise? I'm going to turn time across to find out every teacher falls for it. Is he not full? Yeah. She might as well put like a line of cookies out the door

and then like the teacher follows first, like a cookie. A cookie. Is this the surprise or is there an extra surprise beyond all the cookies? I know, it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. I gotta find out.

Yeah. So yeah, so they gather all the elementary school children around the improvised explosive device, and I'll tell you the jokes just write themselves from there on out. So we should also mention there's one mom that showed up late to the school and left her baby in the car seat

as she's running her other kid into the school. Yeah, yeah, and that's because she's in a rush because her son's late for the hostage situation. She's like, oh shit Right, yeah, we're late for the whole hostage thing. Yeah, so she leaves her kid out in the car seat We're just fucked up. I mean come on lady. You should know better than that shit. Yeah, yeah But so I mean we will come to this later, but that is the least fucked up place her kid is going to be in this film Because that's true. Yeah, the same as that kid. Into a bomb.

Quote rescues. Yeah, it's confusing. Also small detail, but all these kids and adults walk into this classroom with a terrorist who has clearly a bomb and a stack of assault rifles. And every, I guess people in Wyoming, they're like, oh, yeah, that's cool. It looks like every dad's yeah, that's cool.

Looks like every dad's shed. That's right. Oh, it must be show and tell today, yeah, exactly. Right. Right down to when the woman who was rushing in late, she runs into Ben, the teacher will see sort of throughout this film. He looks like a kind of storm surfer

who seems like he just hangs around the school. It's not clear that he's teacher. He says, do you not wear casten's classes? And he sort of says, he might as well be saying, I don't know, maybe they're in the room at the end with the guns and the massive bomb. I mean, give that a try. Maybe go along there with that massive kind

of dangerous situation. Give that a go. Just no curiosity. I think it's like a fireworks expo or something. I don't know if you're gonna answer it. I heard someone saying about air burning. So yeah, it's a a science experiments, I guess. Yeah.

All right. And so now, okay. Now crazy guy with bomb is starting to comprehend the reality of being in a room full of seven year olds for a long period of time. Right. So we get this long scene where he's just like trying to take in all of this noise and bullshit and anger and we're like, and honestly, the scene should be called, yeah, we do underpay them, don't we? All right, but this is also where David lays out the plot. The principal shows up and he's like, you know, I want two million dollars for each of these kids, I'm going to blow everybody up. And like two million dollars for each child is way overpriced. Andy Wilson can get you

them way cheaper. Let me know how many you need. And like, when he sends the prince, he tries to send the principal away to like, do calls around and to try and gather his money. And he says, I'm prepared to stay here for 10 days, if necessary. So, Congress have got the time to raise the money. And like, yeah, hilarious, as if Congress could successfully pass a bill to spend $20 million in 10 days for the day. Straight out of the movie, it lost me at this point in the movie. Right, yeah, exactly.

So also, 10 days just feels like a weird low ball there. Like, you're doing a bomb thing and he's like, I'm prepared. Stay here for 10 entire days like cut to day 11. And he's like, all right, this is too much. I'm doing it. Tap out. It's ridiculous. And I love that there's this moment where like the kids are driving them nuts.

So he starts yelling at them and I'm like, oh, that'll work, man. Yeah, that's going to work wonders for you. All right. So he sends the principal office and says like, oh, that'll work, man. Yeah, that's gonna work wonders for you. All right, so he sends the principal office, and he says, like, you go call the cops, you have 15 minutes to tell them what's going on before I start shooting the kids, right? Yeah, and then he says that something like, it'll be a brave new world.

And then Ben, the stoner teacher, is turning to this hilariously attractive teacher. We don't find it, I think later we found out his name, but he's just hilariously attractive, this teacher, who find it. I think later we found out his name, but he's just hilariously attractive this teacher, who's spent the entire time sort of stood there with his arms folded, sort of shaking his head like, oh, well, this is annoying.

Jesus. That's right. That's right. But Ben sort of leans over and says, Psst, Brave New World is basically the idea of reincarnation. And what? Is that your whispering like that?

How does Ben know about this whole brave new world being the theory incarnation thing? Is Ben part of the same sort of cell and same group as Dave, the terrorist? It's weird that they bring this up at this point. I think he saw his math, right? He's like, wait, that's pie circled. Hold on, I know this equation.

Hold on. Right, and he's telling that other teacher like, oh, let the authorities know this isn't just a terrorist with a bomb. He also made an Aldous Huxley illusion. So this is kind of serious. So yeah, so the principal runs to call the cops. And he's like, yeah, there's a terrorist at the school

at the bomb, they're like, yeah, we know old fucking news, man. We haven't done anything about it, but we know. Oh, you knew. OK. There's a weird intonation about because the principal presumably he's meant to have said Nadine, who's the receptionist at the police station. Nadine, how do you know? But he says Nadine, how do you know?

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Exactly. All right. So we've come back to the classroom where it's time for us to meet little baby Noah girl. Oh, it's the greatest. Oh, I love her. So God damn much. So the terrorist lady needs a count of all the kids.

So she tells all the teachers, hey, everybody gather a count of all the kids. So she tells all the teachers, Hey, everybody gather up and count all the kids that you've got from your class and tell me how many you have. But she says it incorrectly. And this little girl just chimes in and points that out to her. She's like, yeah, you really are not very good at speaking English for that to be your first language. You were then a hundred kids. Okay. I'm a be like, you are then a hundred kids. Okay. I'm a terrorist.

Fuck you. Well, I mean, we do know exactly how many kids there are. We don't need to be saying less off you. We know exactly how, because as all of the teachers count up the number of kids they have, it's like, it's 18, it's 10, it's 15, it's 14, it's 15, it's 12, it's 14. And then quick as a flash, the terrorist is able to add those numbers together. And a teacher generally turns to the teacher who's got a pen and paper

adding up these seven numbers and says, he's right, oh my God. Like they're impressed at his powers of low level addition. He a robot. What's he? Yeah, it's seven two digit numbers. The first digits of which are all one. Ha, ha, ha. So you had to add seven one digit

numbers together and then put 70 on it. That was all that happened. And meanwhile, everybody else was standing around going like, how could you possibly counted that many toothpicks that quick? Yeah. And there's a really small note. And again, it's just because Ben, the teacher is such a bad actor, but when they say how many kids they've got from their class there, he sounds genuinely disappointed that he doesn't have the most kids. So he's lost a game in his head. Meanwhile, by the way, we cut to little car seat girls sitting

in the back, like the fucking forgotten we cut to little car seat girls sitting in the back like the fucking forgotten fair and airplane. I was hoping that was just gonna be a running gag. Yeah, she like, she slams a hand on the window like Kate wins the Titanic and her mom's like psyched it. Different reasons though, very different. Yeah, very different reasons. Thank you for that follow up.

All right, so now the dispatcher is trying to get in touch with Ron McCop, but he's too busy doubting the existence of God, right? We get like five different scenes of her trying to call him and him just not even being in his car. You know, he's just getting like, Hey, Ron, this is pretty important. Really hope you're not about take a long shit at a gas station. I'm watching a long movie. Clearly take a long shit. New paper under his arm.

Yeah. Right. And then there's this other awesome, because there's like several of these awesome kids that fuck with a terrorist. This is another one who is just like not impressed with his gun selection. Right? This kid comes out to him and says, I mean, you got some pretty cool guns, but why not a K 47? That's a better gun than what you have. And the terrorists like, that's the illegal asshole. Fuck you, communist by American. And I got to admit, pretty good

line, pretty good line there. So yeah, and this is where the mom that showed up late suddenly remembers that she has the endangered child in the car, right? In safe and in safe and child. Yeah, well, yeah, right. Yeah, exactly, exactly. And honestly, like, they really lean into the ironic humor now, and I'm impressed by that, right? Like, this was funny.

Yeah, this was genuinely funny. With the terrorist lady going like, you endangered your child by leaving him out in a car. Like, come on, come on, bomb lady, come on. Yeah, that was good. Hey, you're a terrorist, right? Can you just write? And she's like, well still, I mean, a baby?

And did you crack the window? No, you didn't crack the window exactly. You're a bad person. All right, so meanwhile Nadine, the dispatcher that is unable to get a hold of either of this town's cops starts calling parents to tell them what's going on. What an awkward fucking call.

Right? Okay, there's no cops there. It's like, now you will beat the police there almost certainly, right? I just, I want to, guys, see in a hurry going like, okay, first promise not to be mad. So there's a terrorist bomber, no time to explain by. Yeah, right. Yeah. She makes a whole bunch of those. Yeah. So we see like a tense montage of this as well. And a montage of you fooling random people we've not seen before is just

not good filmmaking. It's such a boring thing. I know when we're watching them all run out the door and we're like, oh yeah, you know, oh another one, I bet he runs out the door to yeah, be sure to. Yeah. So and then Doris, that's the female terrorist. She agrees to go get car seat baby and bring him into the bomb area where he'll be safe or she'll be safe. And then we also cut to town hall mobilizing, right? And I only mentioned this because there's this weird scene where I guess the mayor or something turns to the dispatcher and lady and says,

you better let the clergy know too. Yeah, fuck you. Get outta here. Like they shine a big cross sign in the air like Batman and like all of your stuff. Oh, this isn't, yeah, this isn't better isn't it. You better let the clergy know because if anybody is an expert in the trapping and coercing of children, it would be better.

You know, they're like how to get children out of this situation, they can just talk through their own personal experience. Oh no, they can escape in lots of different ways. Here's a list of 15 ways to have a good, good escape. They're fucking slippery. I feel like I'm a consultant done. All right. So meanwhile, we cut back to the classroom and we have this sloppy ass fucking line. This is such bad writing. The one teacher turns to another teacher and says, you know, I've read about these types of things before. We won't be in any real trouble until he starts to profusely

sweat, laid in act two. Right. And I'm like, what the fuck are you reading lately? Okay, but those are standard like TSA guidelines. I'm pretty sure I get side tackled constantly at the airport. I think that's why. Yeah, whereas Prince Andrew can just go straight through all the time, because he can't sweat, so it makes sense. All right, so now Ben, who the stoned teacher that Mars was talking about, I have down a skippy throughout my notes, he realizes that the kids are getting sick because the gasoline in the bomb is dripping, right? And so the fumes are making the kids sick.

And he's like, hey, man, do you mind if we maybe open the windows, vent it a little bit, right? Yeah, so we know after the fact that's what he was doing when he was looking around at the sick kids. But all we seem to is look around vaguely confused. And I thought, is he still trying to add those seven numbers up in his head? And he still hasn't got to 98. So yeah, but, but so after an evil monologue about how he brought a big gun for shooting

grownups, he eventually agrees to allow the windows to, to be opened up, which is going to let the angels in. Hello. We'll get it. It's good. Hey, just one more question, Mr. Tarris. Can we have class outside? Where am I a substitute terrorist? No, you cannot have class outside. I wasn't reborn yesterday with the calculator. All right. So meanwhile, the principle is still on the phone with Nadine, the dispatcher,

which is weird because we've seen her call a bunch of people since he called her. So I guess she put his ass on hold, right? He was on the phone. Thinking to himself like, you know what, this is what's in the paper. Write that down. All right, so now we cut to run the cop, the protagonist ish. And he finally is bothering to pick up his radio. So the lady's like, hey, how close are you to the elementary school? And he's like hours away.

And she's like, huh, aren't you being paid right now to be here in our town? And he's like, yeah, it's going to look real awkward if they end up making a movie about this, huh? As checking on trees, whatever. I'll be there in a minute. I'll be there in a minute. He's just two hours away. Two hours. When he said, I'm two hours away,

this was the first absolute laugh out loud moment of the film of me, because I thought that was such a ridiculous detail. And you know that that's because this is based on a true story. And I don't think he can explain away him not being around. So he had to be honest about the fact that he was two hours away as what seems like

the town's only police officer, but he still wants to tell his story. So he got two hours incredible. Right, yeah. So he's like, we learn here. He's like, well, I will not be able to make it for the movie. Yeah, so now's like, we learn here. He's like, well, I will not be able to make it for the movie. Yeah, so now we cut back to the classroom.

All the kids are gathered around crazy guy, and they're making annoying noises and stuff. And then we get this one kid, and I love this line so much. Again, like the humor works in this movie from the kids. The kid, he goes, your breath smells like peaches. And then he goes, I haven't been eating peachy. He goes, peaches is the name of my dog, zing.

Zing, I love the roots. It's like they just got me and Eli and Heath and Tom and Cecil to gather around this guy for the entire hostage situation. That's amazing. But then Skippy comes up with, he's like, hey guys, I would, I got a great idea for a game called, don't stare down the psychopath with the kill trigger bomb. Oh, this is where he makes the magic square right?

The magic square and by that I mean square. Yeah, exactly right, but but for kids, but it's not clear that the terrorist understands that because the terror we said like let's do a magic square And the terror seems into it, but I think it's because he's thinking yeah, you got down right on a magic square. That's the least that I want around here. That has four sides. Wow. He fucking added those. So, yeah, so he makes a big square out of masking tape and he says, all right, kids, only people with giant bombs are allowed to go into this area so like to keep the kids away from them. And somebody like brings a desk in for him to sit on

and I so want to skip you to like tell yell at him, like, you're out, I got you, I got you, dumbass. You walked into this square. Look fucking dead asshole. Anyway, then we get to the scene where Doris is telling the kids how awesome it's going to be to be a atrocity victim famous. Yeah, and at one point somebody's like, hey lady, it's just your first kidnapping terrorist bomb elementary school thing. And she's like kind of bashful about it. She's like,

yeah, technically. I'm not being cool about it. Where should I stand? You know, I'm going in the magic square. You can. I'm going in. I'm allowed. And then this is where the greatest character in the movie. Again, the little girl, the badant, a little girl is like, you use the word so four times in one sentence. That's just bad word choice. And the teacher like whispers to Doris like, yeah, shoot her first. If you do the like every 10 years. I mean, Doris very much gives her a look like you've made a very powerful enemy today.

Doris shoots it. Yeah, well, I'll tell you what, little girl, you also made a very powerful friend. I will take a fucking you what, little girl, you all should be a very powerful friend. I will take a fucking bullet for this little girl. But the teacher is like, Hey, Jenny, Jenny, look at me. Let's play a little game called shut the fuck up about one choice forever. All right. And then we get this bizarre scene again, because this is based on a true story and they

have to admit this where all the first responders accept the police show up. Right, like the health inspector that goes to restaurants and makes sure there's no rats in and beat the cops to this fucking thing, right? And it's a really small thing, but they've got like a loud halo. I think it's the fire truck putting a loud halo warning. And the warning they're putting out is way too wordy. Yes, it will hurt your children if you try and push past the barricades in order

to make it to the school ground, which within which your children are currently being held against their will, I repeat just sorry. Yeah, back is all you say. Pass the barricades or do you think there was like you did a double knot? You do not like four times in that. like four times in that. Yeah, but basically they're saying like everybody don't interfere that the cops are, well, the cop is going to be here in a couple of hours. Yeah, exactly. We thought about calling the next town over, but it's literally called Ham's fork. So we're gonna wait. Probably won't help. That's a, that's a true fact. The closest town of me is. I don't think I trust their cops either. All right. And then there's

this weird fucking scene where the old teacher lady has to be heroic, right? So she comes to like offer, first she offers her life in place of all the kids and then she has this weird, I'll do whatever it takes, takes out her dentures, you get what I mean kind of moment, right? That is so weird. Like she was offering to fuck this guy, right? Oh, 100%.

100%. All right, yeah, that's what I thought was pretty sexual. Okay. It's the, all right. But what we see now is that the bad guy is sweaty. Uh-oh. I'm going to make some paper fans so that he's not sweating and then means he won't blow us up.

Sweat is the crucial factor here. Also, by the way, is Sneezie kid intentionally sneezing to fuck with him when his hand is close to the trigger? Absolutely. Okay. All right. That's what I thought. Sneasy kid intentionally sneezing to fuck with him when his hand is close to the trigger. Is that? Okay. All right. That's what I thought. And this was again hilarious.

Absolutely hilarious. So Terris guy gets angry again because he didn't realize the daycare element of this whole plot. So he's pissed and he's like, I'm a genius. I can't think around here. Let me shut up. And then Jason, little guy roasts him some more. He's like, bro, are you? Are you still working out parts of your plan right now?

Being this through. But then we see the like pin pull situation where the rope is getting a little bit far away. And then one other kid next Jason sneezes right there, he almost calls the pit. If that had caused the explosion and then credits, best fucking movie. I can't pull absolutely. Absolutely. Yeah. And then we get the fucking all the kids playing like a arousing game of see how close we can get into the psychopaths personal space. Right? They're all like pushing their feet and they're going like, hey, look, if I don't touch my foot down, my foot is over the magic square, but not in the magic square. And the math genius guys said they're going, god damn it, it is just over the square, it's not in fucking swear.

Oh, fucking technical. I want the airspace. Also, it's a cube. It's a cube down. It's a cube down. Magic cube. That was the problem. Ben did not go 3D on his magic. And the thing is, so we're doubling down at this point on the way the terrorist guy is

starting to unravel. And this film is making it really clear that believe and you can die and then come back to life as a sign that you're mentally ill, which would be fine except that this is going to be a religious film. I'm not going to come back and buy you. Yeah, they get writer, but not on purpose. Yeah, but then we have the moment where like David goes, all Joe Pashy, you know, are you laughing at me? Am I funny to you? Funny like a clown, you know, or whatever.

Or he screams at the kids. You think this is silly? Try putting your foot in the magic cube one more time. Try it. See what happens. Serious magic cube one more time. Try it. See what happens to this serious. Oh my God. I loved it. Yeah, this was like basically not touching can't come at.

I was so happy about all these little roast moments. They're the best these little kids. Yeah, but so but he needs to walk it off. And by walk it off, I mean, take a shit. So the terrorist guy gets up and he grabs his girlfriend and he says, Hey, you have to hold onto the dead man switch And she's like well then it's a dead woman switch. He's like whatever Everyday has like this

And so she puts it on and he says like hey whatever you do don't move your hand more than this part Don't even scratch your nose And then he wanders off to the bathroom now old lady and then he wanders off to the bathroom. Now old lady, denture blow job teacher, figures this is her opportunity, right? So she goes to chat it up with Doris and try to calm her down, see if maybe she can talk her into wheeling that bomb out of the classroom

full of children. And there's this frustrating, and I like, sorry, but this is really frustrating, like childless people lack empathy, don't they moment that the two of them share Oh, yeah, absolutely. It that is that is infuriating. Yeah, I'm so fucking sick of that She's like you have children right and she's like yeah, she's like yeah people without children wouldn't understand Why it's bad to come into an elementary school with a bomb?

Thank you. I'd be like we do understand that But it anyways, yo, so this doesn't go anywhere, right? She doesn't convince Doris to do anything good. But Doris is like Simon says hands on your nose. Yes, she fucking decides to show everybody how big the headaches that has it has excedrin written all over it is and the fucking bomb explodes okay so i knew i i checked the note i checked wiki pdf i knew at this point the bomb is gonna go off i still was not prepared for how brutally the bomb goes off and how quickly i i genn- my notes is like

fucking hell movie yeah no shit no especially because it happens two thirds of the way through the movie, right? You kind of assume that's going to happen at the end, but no. So yeah, so the bomb goes off, we get the panicky retreat. Now, and this is, this is true. This is how this actually went down, right? The bomb sat the woman, the Doris on fire.

And she was, you know, burning and dying immediately afterwards. Yeah. And they do a job with that. I mean, that, that, they do that. They do that. And I was not prepared for that. And then David comes out the toilet, sees that and just shoots like it's a fucking zombie film of a fuck. What's happened to this film? Yeah. Yeah. We've, we've, ten seconds, and we've totally changed. Yeah. Dave walks out and he's like, I knew I should have taken a ship before we left. Like, I only had to go a little bit. I didn't want you to know you force it. You don't want it because you get that weird thing.

He's more angry about the air not burning than anything else. You can see him looking around and being like, why is there air not burning? God damn it. Yeah, and so he shoots some teacher that's trying to remove a bunch of barricades and the kids are all running around and everything and chaotic. We try to get out. Then we cut back to the cop, right? And the cop just finds out that the bomb goes off. And so he yells at God.

And I got to say, I don't know that I have ever seen an actor underwhelmed to that degree, right? Usually when you have that big moment and a bad actor, they overact. This guy did the exact opposite to a ridiculous degree. It looked to a, oh, shocks God. Kind of a degree. Yeah, to a point where I thought for a second when he's saying, how could you let this happen? Because you're not even there. I thought he was still talking to Nadine down the police radio. Nadine, Nadine, Nadine, you're not even there. Jesus. The bomb went off in the elementary school. I'm not mad. I'm disappointed, though. I will say I'm disappointed. Jesus, he goes, I bet you

don't even exist. God, do you exist? God, just go. I win disappointed though. I will say I'm disappointed. Jesus. He goes, I bet you don't even exist. God do you existence. God just go. I win. Fuck you. And that's because that's how atheism works. And then the terrorist guy David goes back into the bathroom to shoot himself. I really wanted him to take out a calculator and shoot himself in the head with the calculator. All right. Well, in a same movie, we'd have a wrap up scene and then the credits, but we're about to learn this ain't no sane movie. So we're going to pause right there, but first let me give it back to you the hard. So we're any children killed in the explosion.

How about that teacher that got shot? Will this movie make with those details quickly so you can just get on with writing fucking jokes? Find out the answers to those questions are no when we return for the be reasonable ask conclusion of the Cokeville miracle. It's like you've been trading your whole life to watch the third act of this. All right, we're finally doing it. This is so exciting.

We're going to open up our very own firework store Okay, so let's so sorry, um Dave You say something about the air will burn just now what? No, you said you just you just said no, I definitely okay, whatever weird so let's talk about what we should get for July 4th. What was your favorite kind of firework when you were a kid just like shout him out? Oh, I love to bottle rocket. Okay, bottle rockets.

Yeah, nice. And then streamers streamers are good for kids. Yeah, streamers little kids perfect. Hey, Dave, Dave, what you doing with the calculator? And I've defeated death QED. I'm sorry. What's that Steve? Did you say you defeated death? Nope. Okay. Alan, you heard that right? He said that. Yeah. Yeah. Look, you definitely mumbled. I defeated death QED. Yeah. No. No. Yeah. And, yeah, yeah. Look, you definitely mumbled, I defeated death QED.

Yeah. No. No. Yeah, and you said QED didn't. Okay. Well, it just feels like you're not focused on the new store. No, no, I'm good. I'm totally focused.

You're totally focused? Okay. All right. So, what about a name for... I'm going to blow up an elementary school. All right. You want to call it a day? Start fresh tomorrow. What about a name for I'm gonna blow up an elementary school All right, you want to call it a day start fresh tomorrow. We're gonna call it a day Dave maybe pray about that last thing mental health care isn't real

And we're back for still more of this shit. We're gonna open up a couple days after all the Interesting parts of the story are over. Oh, I was so mad here. I had this realization. I was just like, fuck, all right, the whole rest of the movie is going to be apologetics for a kid bombing. That's, we have a hour of that here. Yep. They're going to jingle keys at us. I was, I was just hoping the one saving grace would be that the dad hadn't made it home

yet. So I said, yeah, this is really bad. All right. So the dumb kid from a word, Jason, this is really bad. All right. So the dumb kid from a word Jason, he's watching. I got blown up on the news. He's got a bandaged hand. And apparently he's been non-responsive and watching cops ever since the, um, the bombing, both of which would be disturbing trends in a child.

So yeah, I got it. Maybe get him some Thomas the tank engine or something. I don't know. Don't have a lot of cops. Yeah. And I also love how like annoyed they are that he isn't all right yet. So I don't understand. He was blown up. It's been like three days, two days maybe this is he should be over this by now. The kids bounce back from a bummer. Is he gonna bitch about this all? Is he gonna ruin his whole fucking week if we just get over this Jesus and the dad there's this great moment where the dad's like it's my fault for not being there And I'm like normally when a dad says that he's wrong

Definitely your fault dude that was you didn't need to take that long of a shit year fault, dude, that was you didn't need to take that long of a shit two hours away. Just because you really like the gas station bathroom there. That's weird. All right. And there's also this weird moment where we like, we do an extreme close up on the kids PTSD. For a second, that was bizarre. So they take the kid to see a therapist.

And there's really almost no need for there, no reason for this scene at all because like it's just a dad waiting in the therapist waiting room and the therapist comes out and says, you're going to have to have a scene after this where you talk to your son. But the dad has this exchange with the receptionist at the therapist and he's been in there for like two hours. Should I be worried? He's been in so long and she does silence.

I thought that's harsh. In any of the world, no, no, there's nothing to worry about. Just like stony face silence, still don't know. I'm going to. Yeah. Two hours. Would you say that's a long time officer?

Run? Two hours? Is that long? I just wanted to say, yeah, it's really weird. Like normally the kids are like 10 minutes. yeah it's really weird like normally the kids are like 10 minutes so it's really strange that he's taken yoke must be really fuck. So yeah so so they go home to chat and woking a whole nother god damn scene for some reason I feel like it's going to just been an extension of the one before last and we're going to

skip the therapist. But now it's time for the dad and the mom and the kid to have the, there were angels in the movie the whole time talk. And there's just a little exchange between the dad and the mom here. And first of all, the mom is cleaning the mirror of the house. And I think that's because they were low on time in the property they'd rented to shoot this film in, so they had to double up on time. It was like, yeah, but they were gonna hack to and clean at this point. They'd get us back. We literally can't afford to lose our deposit on this shoot.

We've got to get this thing going. And she also says, you know, don't interrogate him like he's a suspect. And I was just so badly wanted to cut to the dad brutalizing him in custody. It's really going to town on this kid. Sliding him in my juice box across the table pulling it back. No. No, yeah. So the kid comes in and he's like, you know, there's something that I really want to talk

to you about. They're like, it's okay. You can talk to us about anything. And he goes, it's about that day with the explosion. I was like, well, fucking course it is, man. I mean, so, but he's just, you know, what I never told you guys, because I just made this up afterwards is that there were angels in the room dressed all in white. And the angels said, go stand by the window.

And that's the reason the kids go stand by the window. And that's the reason the kids were standing by the window. Not the fact that it was a room filled with gasoline fumes and the kids were vomiting if they didn't, but because the angels told them. Yeah, and there's a thing that we will never confront in this entire film, in this entire story about how the kids midway through this hostage negotiation siege thing started seeing angels is that they only started seeing angels is that they only started seeing the angels after they were starting to inhale a lot of gasoline if you can't tell the point.

I started to get light headed. Right. It's a little atoll. No. No. Well, and then to really show you what a bizarre ass fucking story we're dealing with and why you can't trust any god damn thing that anyone involved with says immediately when the kids is there was somebody trust all in white and it was an old lady the mom runs and gets a photo album and says it was at any of your dead relatives

in this book right which is probably exactly what really happened right like all these kids were like yeah I was just like there was like there was a presence in the pairs were like, was it like Jesus Christ? Exactly and the kids were like, sure, right? Anyway, yeah, and it's like, why didn't you tell us this before? Is that because I haven't been up then? Come on, come on. It's not true. You've already seen that I'm not a smart child. It takes me longer to make stuff. You've already seen that I'm not a smart child. It takes me longer to make stuff. Also, you guys didn't think about talking to me about the bomb until the therapist told you.

He goes out. The mom when he identifies the which dead relative it was. the mom says, and I quote, I think there's too much of a coincidence to be a coincidence. Oh, God, that made me feel ill because this has been like the dad's catchphrase whenever anybody says, I love you. And the thing is, every single time one of his kids says, I love you and he says, well, that's too much of a coincidence to be a coincidence. The kid looks in like, what?

And he's like sad and confused and disappointed. And you just know that this was a line that they were always going to pay off. And even the child actors knew it was dumb and could not muster up the enthusiasm for it. Right. Yeah. Right. But the wife looks at the camera and winks. And then it's me. And then call back. Yeah, exactly. Okay. So then late that night, mom and dad are wondering why a movie would introduce this plot so late in the game. And the dad's like, you know, I know he says he has a magical friend, but I don't know if I believe him. And the mom is like, you don't believe your own son.

He's like about ghosts. No. I'm not interested. No. She's like, is this because you're a cop, you fucking cop and he's like, no. You guys are all bastards, that's what I heard. And so I said I'm a grown up.

Okay. That's the thing is like, because you don't believe you're on son, and I thought, do you always believe him every time? Because no wonder this kid is such a fuck up that he doesn't know any of the prejudices and only about the state he lives in because his mom is just credulous

to anything this kid says. Right, she's like, I didn't realize the capital of Wyoming was W. It is, I guess. I just went and went and went and want to doubt my own son. So yeah, so like he's like, yeah, you know, even though my kid who is suffering severely traumatized said later that while he was huffing a bunch of fucking explosion fumes, he saw angels and not entirely convinced the mom's like, so you're going to treat your son like a criminal. He's like, how, how so? How is that? Wait, hold on. And he basically says, well, you know, I'm trained that way.

I'm trained to want proof. And he might as well add, and that's a bad thing. That's a bad thing. That's a bad thing. I'm also trained to shoot black people. But we're not going to deal. That's a different, totally different thing than what we're dealing with in this movie. And the mom is like, but what if other children are. That's a totally different thing than what we're dealing with in this movie.

And the mom is like, but what if other children who were traumatized and high on gasoline fumes also saw inexplicable things? And he's like, well, in that case, I guess that'd be proof of God, huh? Excuses. All right. You know what, I'm on board.

I'm gonna go around town and investigate angels. Yes, yes. I'm a police officer. That's exactly it. That's what happens now. That's yeah. She says, well, your job is to investigate. You're the town's investigator. And he's like, I guess I should go find out

if it was angels, then shouldn't I? Right. I'm gonna start with that gas station all the way out of town. I guess that's right. They can't get this guy when there's a goddamn bomb in the elementary school, I'm gonna start with that gas station all the way out of town I'm gonna start with that gas station all the way out of town I'm gonna start with that gas station all the way out of town I'm gonna start with that gas station all the way out of town I'm gonna start with that gas station all the way out of town I'm gonna start with that gas station all the way out of town I'm gonna start with that gas station all the way out of town I'm gonna start with that gas station all the way out of town I'm gonna start with that gas station all the way out of town I'm gonna start with that gas station all the way out of town I'm gonna start with that gas station all the way out of town I'm gonna start with that gas station all the way out of town I'm gonna start with that gas station all the way out of town I'm gonna start with that gas station all the way out of town I'm gonna start with that gas station all the way out of town I'm gonna start with that gas station all the way out of town I'm gonna start with that gas station all the way out of town I'm gonna start with that gas station all the way out of town I'm gonna start with that gas station all the way out of town I'm gonna start with that gas station all the way out of town I'm gonna start with that gas station all the way out of town I'm gonna start with that gas station all the way out of town I'm gonna start with that gas station all the way out of town I'm gonna start with that gas station all the way out of town I'm gonna start with that gas station all the way out of town I'm gonna start with that gas station all the way out of town I'm gonna start with that gas station all the up his goal. Right, not the absolute pinnacle of the profession. Be the best. Yeah, this is like the D team terrorist versus the D team police. Right.

So yeah, so he goes off to ask traumatized eight year olds if they have any confirmation of his religion, but we're going to start with the principle, right? And I love this line. So God damn much. This is the exact fucking question that he asked the principal. He says, speaking of the day that the terrorist bomb showed up in his school, did you see anything out of the ordinary? see anything out of the ordinary that you know again my homing you know what rifles home it bombs

here so okay so now we're gonna start laying out all the evidence that this was angelic or divine you know again let's keep in mind and omnipotent god could have given them a flat tire and had a cop within three and a half hours of the school but exhibit a is the miraculous way that the fire alarm kept going off by accident right before that. So that all the kids were all prepped for an emergency.

But they weren't. They weren't. We saw the fire alarm go off before and they all walked out of the classroom with their arms folded slowly. And the print will says they learned to get out the room quickly to crawl to find it. It's like, movie, you remember you showed us that and we did. We did.

It's not how that happened. You could have sure them doing that, but they didn't. Yeah, I don't think they do drills for that. They do like fire drills, not like a bomb has now exploded. What's the best way to get out now with the air on fire? And then and the principal goes and you know what after the building exploded that stopped happening all together. Why? And then oh god and the exhibit be is even dumber. He goes, and also here's something inexplicable, the magic square. How could that teacher have possibly known that having kids right next to the homemade

bomb with the dead man trigger on a skit's a friend it would be bad? Maybe that teacher knew how to integrate e to the. And the cops says, well, but couldn't that just be coincidences? And the principles like, I don't think things just coincide with each other. Do they? I fucked up my that fuck up my whole religion actually. So he talks to the principle, then he goes to talk to the fucking bomb expert. Oh, I love the bomb expert so much. Oh, well, hey, okay, so, Mars, this is the fucking foremost expert in all of Lincoln County, Wyoming, unexplosed, okay, so don't you start giving him shit?

Yeah. His opening line is when that bomb went off, there shouldn't have been any survivors, and then every other line is an explanation of why that's wrong. Yeah, this bomb expert policeman again. This is like a high ranking policeman is like, all right, let me list some angel stuff for you. So the windows were open. The milk jug was leaking. So the movie is saying that God was watching a terrorist bomber of an elementary school getting ready for his thing and being like, okay, you know, it would be hilarious, a slightly inefficient gasoline container. This is going to be great.

This is going to be such a good prank. Yeah, except it's the milk jug that he got from a dump at a hole in it. Maraculous. Sweet. And I love the fact that as we're talking through all these different pieces, the movie's going back over showing us each little bit of the bomb, like it's the twist in a heist movie. Like we're finding out exactly who did do the crime the entire time.

It's so good. It's so good. And then yeah, exhibit D is that ventilation existed the whole time. Exhibit E is that only two of the five blasting caps went off. And I'm like, yeah, what possible explanation could there be for that bomb not being top notch, even though that guy could add seven two digit numbers? Yeah. And he says it's not that the wires were like, uh, afraid they were cut as if they were clipped with wire cutters

It's like who could have done that because all we know is that the bomb was built by a crazy person and transported in the back of a van Continuing two men who wanted nothing to do with the bomb and then left in the care of a daughter Who also wanted nothing to do with the bomb it must have been angels that is the bomb Yeah, right and then angels would know which color to cut Yeah, right. And then angels would know which color to cut We only found lefty scissors in that kindergarten room. What are the odds a lefty kid was able to do that? It's it's not no it's an effect is the scissors in that kindergarten room They would have all those plastic ones that barely even cut paper. They're not making a time And then exhibit fucking I guess we're up to F now exhibit F is that the shrapnel from the bum

Because he had a bunch of like bullets and shit that we're supposed to be shrapnel all of that missed all of the people in the room except When it didn't and hit them Right like if that's his he's like think about all the shrapnel that missed all the people and the guys like well What about the shrapnel that hit him? He's like no, I'm talking about the shrapnel that didn't think about all of that shrapnel that missed all the people in the guys like well what about the shrapnel that hit him he's like no i'm talking about the shrapnel that didn't think about all of that shrapnel just we just think about that shrapnel it's miraculous i finished up thinking about it now i would like to dwell on the uh...

shoo you're very sleepy and we've got to talk about the whiteboard as well yes you all got it that was so fucking hard for me to ignore so there's a point where we zoom in on this phase of the only thing that you can see on the whiteboard behind them. It's got other words, these are just the first few words of two different sentences, but they just read when we see them all cut off, it just says doors open, retarded. And I haven't trouble focusing on anything. Wait, what? Because it says, it said doors open

for ventilation retarded, the fire retarded, the explosion or, what? That's it. Because it says, it said doors open for ventilation, retarded the fire, retarded the explosion, or something like that. But it zooms in and it's just like doors open for a tire. We're phrasing. It's like windows open on the white ball behind in the entire scene. It's like windows open, and it says doors open. It's a dash less explosive confinement, exclamation mark.

And it was like the bomb experts kind of verdict, but it just looked like it was there so that the actor playing his cop could remember his cues. These are the words that are gonna come up and you have lines after that. Off you go. Doors open, angels? Question, like what?

Yeah, I love the idea too that this bomb expert had to walk over to his whiteboard and go, hmm, doors windows. Oh, hold on, I'm seeing a fucking batter. What are the odds on that? That's like one and four and that's like half of each state of windows and doors. That's like two tails in a row. I mean, the dollars could have been a jaw in fairness. There's a third state. Oh, shit. And that's a really fucking thing. So yeah, so he interviews the, the principle interviews the bomb experts.

So he goes back to his wife and they present those interviews as like him reporting all of this back to his wife. And she's like, she has this great moment and they try to sell this so hard because this is the crux of their entire argument. They're like, it doesn't make any sense that someone so genius that he could add seven two digit numbers together wouldn't think to make sure that he didn't have a leaky milk jug bomb. Right.

Immortal from math. He's that good a math. He can't. Yeah. Yeah. The wife thought he wasn't that stupid. It's not. No He's that good a math. He can't. Yeah. Yeah. The wife thought he wasn't that stupid. It's not no. He was a real genius. He could count to 98 like that. And so he's a crap. Yeah. And so again, and here's what really happened. Right. The guy had been making these homemade bombs. He tested one in a school bus, and it worked really, really well in a school bus,

because the school bus is a completely sealed environment, right? When he tried to do the same thing in a building with windows and doors open, the bomb went pretty much straight up, right? Took out a bunch of roof tiles, like bombs tend to do if they're not tammed. And that's what fucking happened,

and they're trying to sell that as the miracle, right? Now, what that tells you among a number of things is this guy wasn't very smart. Yeah. Yeah, that is just one of the pieces of evidence that he was not smart. Yeah. I think the one being he thought he could mathematically

prove he's only in combination with just a bit of a giveaway. Yes. And he kept saying that yeah, we'll burn which I've never met a small person say that more than that. That's true. That's true. Oh, an exhibit G. We have to point this out.

The cops says, and you know what, in his journal, all the bombs he tested always worked. One of the odds that the one time it wouldn't work was this time. And I'm like, well, or he didn't write down, I fucked up again for posterity. He tested, always worked. One of the odds that the one time it wouldn't work was this time. And I'm like, well, or he didn't write down, I fucked up again for posterity. It could also be there. What we saw was, he said trial number four, perfect. And he seemed surprised that it was perfect. So we know all the time, he bragged about all the times he built and tested bombs.

It was three. He did. Right. Yeah. But this is insane to the cops and to the wife. Like the idea is that he was batting a thousand on exploding bombs. I feel like that's not that hard. Like you're going to make an explosion happen.

Well, right. Regardless. Right. An explosion happened on this. Also, he's still batting a thousand. Yeah. That happens. That happens. But like they're saying they're saying like what if you compare that to you know while he coyote numbers um another super genius by the way it's way too high to explain a misfire

he's been a thousand so and then the comp says and this is actually a great point he says the cat goes hey you know unexplainable things happen all the time which is very much true but this one is explainable so it's even easier right those happen even more often than He says the cop goes, hey, you know, unexplainable things happen all the time, which is very much true. But this one is explainable, so it's even easier, right? Those happen even more often than the unexplainable things. And then here's the most terrifying thing in the movie to me. And this is a movie where a guy walks into a fucking elementary school with a homemade bomb and a dead band switch.

The scariest part is where the cop goes to interview the other children to ask if they saw any apparitions that day. Yeah. Right. And you got girl Noah who attends that was also traumatized enough to either lie or be wrong. Yeah. Brilliant evidence. Right. Right. Exactly. And the I you know, she's like, yeah, there was an angel there. Told me I would be okay. And then disappeared all Batman style. Like I looked away and then just wasn't there. And then my brother said, hey, come to the window, how would he have known? Right? And again, and again, the fucking, the mom in this scene runs and grabs her family photo

album and says, is there any dead people that that person that you saw look like any dead people in this book that could validate my religion? Yeah. Was this, was this the exact angel that you saw? And the girls like, yes, 100%. And at this point, I wanted so bad for atheist dead to make him do an angel lineup. Oh, and the thing is, it's not even out of a photo album that they recognize in this angel. It's from a locket, but the movie goes way out of the way to make a big deal about how hidden away the locket was.

It's in a drawer, it's underneath the stuff. It's hidden inside some paper wrapping. It's like, it's as if the movie's yelling, you see, there's no way this kid could ever have seen it. So it must be true. It's working way too hard. And again, the thing that the kid could never have seen is a picture of her grand mother. Give me a fucking break.

This is the one picture they have of grandma. Give me a fucking break. Or lying. Yeah. Regardless of whether he's seen it. Right, right. Exactly. And by the way, exhibit I is just that her sister says, yes, after all of that,

right? The other girl. The creepiest way as well. Her sister seems like this, it seems like this is not the first explosion her sister has seen. She is a veteran who's like, got long term PTSD and she's just staring off in the middle. She was fucked up over in hand for care. We have. staring off in the middle of the it was fucked up over in ham fork. Yeah, we he's a veteran of ham. All right, so we cut back to the

him explainer all of these interviews to the wife and he's like, you know, and the swanson girl set a woman helped her out of the room too. And I'm like, yeah, but there were women helping children out of the room too. And I'm like, yeah, but there were women helping children out of the room there. That is exactly what we were. And then she's like, and then she got out and she looked up and she couldn't find the woman anymore.

And I'm like, it was smoky, right? Like the woman, just that's not even, that's not even a dead person anyway. But fucking, but mom is Hundopi on the miracle hypothesis, right? Oh, yeah, no, she's, she's a fucking idiot. Right? She's like, a fucking lady mom is hundo p on the miracle hypothesis, right? Oh, yeah, no, she's she's a fucking idiot She's like a fucking lady who was there and then not There are you trying to tell me that there are mobile ladies and low visible fires give me a fucking break it out of you

It's bullshit cop such a carous fucker. And he has such a weird line here as well, because the wife says like, huh, so again, it was an ancestor. And he says, yeah, what's that about? And that is such a weird question. I mean, I can accept angels coming back to help kids, but I just don't get, why would they be family angels?

That's what's going on. That's the weird, it's the dumb thing. Should be generic angels, should be. Also, we're learning that some of these kids saw angels That's the way it is. It's the dumb thing. Should be generic angels. Should we? We're learning that some of these kids saw angels of their ancestors and some didn't. That means some of these kids, either their entire ancestry is still alive

or your entire ancestry didn't really care about the other thing. Yeah, right, right. Exactly. I'm doing angel stuff to the, I don't know. It's not somebody. So the princess was like two hours away and then I was a bone. No.

I'm stuck behind this cop in traffic. I don't know what's happening. You know how you can't pass cops even if they're going slow. So yeah, so the cops like, you know, I'm not entirely sure. And she yells, you're such a cop. I heard you're such a cop, which made a very different movie for just a second, but I went back. It was cop. And she's like, you know, your problem is that you lack the humility to assume that the creator of the goddamn universe bent the laws of physics to specifically involve himself in your goddamn life.

Like an asshole. So yeah, you haven't got the humility to thank God for blessing us. And indeed for putting us in the situation the first place. Right. Yeah, exactly. So the cops like, Hey, son, come downstairs. Is there any other angel evidence that you were saving for later in act three? And the sense like, yeah, actually there was. All the ages look like light bulbs. Yeah, that was a little bit like when you're playing like Skyrim or an RPG or something like that. I mean, you have to click through all the question options.

Yes. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That was lit up that I haven't clicked, hang on. Oh, yes. This is an amazing moment too. The movie confuses the fuck out of itself. So the kid says, yeah, I saw a bunch of angels coming through the ceiling. They look like light bulbs. And then the dead, a cop is like, yeah, I can't think of how lights might be on a seal.

Yeah, I'm sorry to come around. Well, this is the thing, it's time to show us the kid a light bulb. What you mean like this? And the kid's like, no, lit up is that come on kid, you know what I meant. Yeah, we are implied that it could be lit up. God damn it. It's like a literal lightpo moment, it's ridiculous. Yeah, the lipo really does come on for a mere, but then here's how stupid this fucking

evidence is, the kids says, yeah, I saw a bunch of angels float down like big lights and they surrounded the explosion and pushed it up into the air so that it would go up instead of out. And then the kid leaves and the mom's like, there's no way he could have known that the explosion would have gone through the roof tiles without us explaining I'm like he was there. He saw an explosion like let's assume because this kid didn't know the capital of Wyoming he grew up there I get like that he's not the brightest walking kid and might not know just intuitively that explosions go up. Right? But if they even

even if he didn't, he watched it happen. If there weren't angels there, he still would have seen up. I want to see these angels meeting up before the bomb. To be like, hey, oh, are you here for the bomb? Me too. Okay, get out of here. Cool. With the bomb. We're gonna do that. So I was thinking we make it go up. I'm locked in. Up you say, huh? And everybody's like, all right. Well, no, why don't we just stop it? Not at the bomb doesn't go off. There's a bunch of things we could do where the bomb doesn't go off. Like we cut all the wires. I was thinking cut two of the wire. Okay. You know what, Dottie, you're really making it weird. You're just complicating it a lot more. You said it could

do it. It's my one time as soon as my turn. Oh, you know what it is. It's because they had some arsehole angels there. And they have to come to like a consensus. So we stop the bomb. No, no, I want the bomb to be bigger. Right. Like I was later, you've got like an angel, like putting out its 15 cigarettes, stirring it out in the flashlight. Guys, okay, how about this? We could go up and we cut all of the wires,

not all the wires, two of the wires. We cut two of the wires. We're doing two. Okay. God dammit. No, I know it's your turn, but we normally do like, you know, coin flip stuff. Like, this is a bomb.

All right. So we, um, we cut back to the bomb expert guy to really drill in on their shitty evidence. There's just this one one that I have to talk about where they, where the bomb experts says, you know, that man that said that created this bomb had police training. What are the odds? He wouldn't do this right.

I'm like, do they train you in the police academy? How to blow up classrooms with IEDs? Right, let's get, don't get me wrong. In Wyoming, I'd be 12% surprised if they did, right? Like so I'm not saying that definitely doesn't happen. Okay, and this was a 9-11 conspiracy scene, right? Yes, so very, it was like the bomb went straight up, controlled demolition.

Bombs don't go up that fast, do that. Wait, it's either the 9-11 thing. I was like, if you look very carefully, the bomb went up and to the left. Oh, it's the left. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh I'm in fact, did you know there were zero Jewish kids at school in my home in that day? Yeah, but that's every day. And again, like the bomb is not tamped at all of fucking course. It's going to go up.

That's what bombs do. Anyway, so so dad, since they're processing all these new fucking light bulb revelations and he's like, wow, there's no way our kids could have known that explosions went up. That fucking idiot said earlier that Thomas Jefferson was the 18th president. I mean, and the first two listed on the chalkboard and he still said that anyway, yeah, okay. And then, of course, and then he goes, you know what, there's something outside, learned. He turns to the wife and says that because the writers couldn't think of any other way to present this except for

To have him tell it to the camera, right? And we watched the, I think you try to make some argument about the fact that the kids put their feet in the square Or I didn't, I didn't understand what the hell they were trying to say there, so I just left that out. Right, dad was just like, yeah, I heard Jason was roasting the guy the whole time and mom's like, yes. Okay, how is that a helpful right now though? And he's like, no, I'm just proud. I mean, you know, I get fucking, I get my growth to be a podcaster, you never know. God does look like a meth version of Sunspan or something.

No, that's true. That's a big one. And then, okay, so and then we get exhibit J, which is my favorite. Oh, yeah. The cop goes like, and here's another proof that this might be divine. All the cops were gone because if I'd been around, I would have fucked this all up. Right. So much worse if I'd been present? Yeah, dad's convinced he would have like smashed through the wall

like the cool eight man. Would you? And then finally we get to the point that we've been building towards this entire movie apparently exhibit K prayer happened. Oh, Jesus Christ. So yeah, so they show all the kids praying. I love the smart kid. Like, you should pray you're the smartest kid. She's like, that's right. I am the smartest kid. All right, dear God, please allow the gasoline to drip slowly into his flower aluminum mixture, turn into a paste. Won't aerosolize the air won't burn.

Yeah, that'll piss you off. Please God, please God, could you cut the wires but not all of them, just like some of them. It's also like the kids say you should pray, you're the smartest one. And to be honest, actually, like the smartest kid in the class would statistically be less likely to be into the whole process. Right. You are three above the dumbest kids. So you can lead the rest of us in front. There's never been one of me doing this. Oh man, if pedantic girl had just like hold up a study on her phone that was like, Hey, you know, the Templeton Society tried to study intercessory prayer.

It made it worse for people. It actually made it worse. We're not doing that. But again, like the argument that because he's like, you know, and it wasn't just the kids there that were praying, everyone in the whole town was praying. And like, yeah, when does anybody ever pray to them, not been okay? You proved it. But the other thing that was actually admitting is this is a town full of people that are

seriously predisposed to interpret things religiously. And therefore, this is in no need of explanation, right? Yeah, and have a chip on the shoulder about it because we cooked you a woman Gathering people together in a different kind of building and says we may not be allowed to be on the school Grounds and I may be fired for doing this But if anybody wants to please join me in prayers like yeah, they would totally fire you for praying while your school was Undeced those bloody lips so Please join me in prayer. It's like, yeah, they would totally fire you for praying while your school was under siege. Those bloody lips. So ridiculous.

Like literally, she's like, we're not allowed to be on school property. Christianity is illegal, of course. Here in Wyoming, I'll probably get fired for this. But let's practice a little Christianity secretly. All right, but no, let me fill you in on what's going on here because she should have been fired for this. That that was the principal of the high school that that was the principal of the high school

That was the principal of the high school in that town leading the kids in the high school in prayer. Yes, that was illegal as all fuck Yeah, I thought this was just like a group of parents meeting in a nearby building That's what I thought it for you, but yeah, no, but that's the fucking principle that because he cuts in right after that. And he's like the entire high school was praying. And I'm like, oh my God, is that what we just watched? So you I went back and watched it again. And yes, that's what that was supposed to be. That was the, that was the fucking high school principle going like, you know, normally we're a little bit more nice to the one brown kid in the school, but fuck him. Fuck him and his Hindu bullshit. Today we're all Christian. Yeah. Cool. So this movie was in like 2017, 2016, something

like that. I think it was May in 2015. Yeah. When was the incident, you know, 1989? Okay. Yeah. So, you know, there haven't been any major like school violence issues. No, no, I'm not. So that was working. That's pretty much all of it. The prayer worked so well. Yeah. major like school violence issues. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, the school blew up, she stopped to pray rather than filling him in on the detail. Oh, yes. Yeah, when he's in the car saying, why won't you talk to me? Give me more details. And I actually previously had in my notes, well, myth, she's got other priorities, a building, you know, a bomb just went off and you're no idea.

And it's like she did have other priorities and they were defucking proud of her. Yes. Yeah. And he says, where the cop dad says he tried to pray to but like couldn't He's like yeah, you know, I heard about the bomb that sounded pretty bad. I thought about praying I really did but then you know, I thought about the origin of species. I just couldn't do it And the wife's like you didn't pray a fucking asshole And we see like a montage of other people praying as well doesn't make sense. And the way it's like, you didn't pray a fucking asshole.

And we see like a montage of other people praying as well. They say like the whole country was praying, all of America and we cut to the only black person you've seen in this entire film who slowly goes to prayer. And it's like people around the world are praying, even Mexicans pray for it. Yeah.

That's ridiculous. That was weird. Cause it takes a lot to get Mexicans to pray as well. Like you've got to really take that right. Exactly. Exactly. Exactly. Oh, this is a cool montage. You're going to show some Muslim people praying.

No, no, weird. No. Okay. Okay. So and then and then he attacks on and he's like, but the most amazing thing of all is how brave everyone is and the way that everyone kept going back in to make sure that the kids were okay before they got themselves to safety. And I'm like, yeah, humanism, dude. Right? Like that makes so much more fucking

sense because that can be demonstrated to be real and actually helps. Yeah. And if genuinely thought God was saving them, they wouldn't have had to go back in. Like, no, it's fine. It's in there, but God's going to salt this out. So I'm just going to run. No, the fact that they went back in and proved they didn't think God was going to save them. Exactly. Hold on. Hold on. These kids, I think they were thinking about it. So they saw all these angels just piece out right away after the bomb. And they're like, all right, it's on us. I guess to like clean up the aftermath, right? Because that's the story that the angels were like, okay, bomb

went up, nailed it. Later, guys. Yeah, I'm right, right exactly. All right, but dad isn't quite convinced yet because there's still seven more minutes in this fucking movie. So they go to church, but will dad go in? Yes, he will. So this I don't know why I brought it up here. He's gonna go in this time. There's a moment though where he like almost doesn't and the wife is like Ron get the fuck in the church. Are you serious right now? He's like, oh like almost doesn't and the wife is like Ron get the fucking the church. Are you serious right now? He's like, uh, still not. So the column cosmological argument, I feel like it falls apart. Like I can't get past the first premise. Some things don't have a cause, right?

Like that's just, okay, I'm going. I'm going. So, but, but, and again, like admitting more than you're supposed to in your dumbass fucking movie, she says, you know, Ron, eventually, if you don't join my religion enthusiastically, I'll divorce you. And a minute later, he finds God. Yeah. Yeah. Right. You know, you've got to figure out what's real and what's not in this world. Otherwise, you could lose us and what she means is up for the not real stuff. That's what you. Yeah. Exactly. Right. Yeah. And she says, Ron, you're the greatest man I know, but, but we live in a town with a population of 548.

So that's not saying much, you know. And as we'll find out a congregation of about 20 people in this, I want to say a church, I actually want to say side room from a 1970s hotel conferencing facility. Right now, having Cauderoy walls, I just haven't seen that. It was Coderoy walls. Really? Yeah.

Oh, I'm going to go back and look for that. So he walks in. He doesn't feel right in church because God is either non-existent or evil. And the pastor's going like, yeah, you know, it seems like God could have miracleed, you know, before the guy had a bomb in the school at all. Or, you know, before all the second degree burns and the smoke inhalation, and I shit you not. This was bound to happen eventually if we watched enough fucking movies.

As the goddamn pastor is saying this, the dead character is literally jingling key. Yes. Fantastic. He's actually smaker actually holding his key chains just jingling around and said it's so good. And then so the pastor asked that question like why wouldn't God just like stop it before the bomb long pause. And then he's like okay, a follow up question to myself. Why would God let other kids get killed in other bombings? Another law.

Oh, he's got questions. I really got questions. Everybody's like, oh, you're done. I think if you're doing the sermon, did you, you want to question, you don't have an answer there? He goes, but you know, I know a lot of you want to hate those bad guys that traumatize your children and almost killed them and at least tried to, but hating them won't help. My religion will, my religion will help greatly on that. You have to have to hate them.

It was one hell. Gay people in the other. Yeah. That's where they hate you. Hey, Ron, can you come in here? Look at his keys. Look at this guy's keys. Mm-hmm. Yeah. So yeah, so dad wanders off from this boring asserman and he catches all the kids singing in the fucking

kid singing room. And I have no idea what's going on here. Some of the kids have little Jesus album covers to hold up, some don't. I don't know what. I don't know what that, yeah. That was weird. Did they pass out like posters of Jesus to hold up some don't I don't know what I don't know what that yeah that was weird do they pass out like

Jesus to hold up like a stadium like they make a like a mosaic of Jesus I don't know it was not that really handsome Jesus picture as well and the pedantic kid a little Noah Get like girl Noah's give him on and I really wanted her to point out that Jesus would have been significantly more brown than in that picture Where's her movie? I want just a movie about her. Just follow up on that. But here's what we're watching. This scene is a room full of kids with like taped up faces and casts on their arms from

bomb injuries. Clear. Singing about God's divine plan and how he loves them. That's what's happening. That's what that's the scene. Yeah, am I crazy? No, every kid's like their wounds and bandages all scream boy, did God half-ass this miracle and they're holding signs. Right, the one kid has a sign that says Heavenly Father, are you really there And you hear and answer every child's prayer. And I'm like, no, no, and no. Another kid signs us pray, he is there. I'm like, also no, and no. This is easy.

This is the easiest quiz I've ever taken. The one thing I really wanted from this scene as well, is that we like cut to the front of the room that the kids are looking towards. And I just want to see all the angels there. So like double thumbs up. So I think this is from the... kids looking towards and I just want to see all the angels that like double thumbs up. Getting a medal from Princess Layers. But then this is the moment where dad cop praise outside and becomes religious again.

And then in braces his children and his glorious new Christianity. And they we get that weird big Christian family hug and Then dad leads them in prayer, right? That's pretty much it. That's it And then of course the movie jumps all over our shit and tries to give a breakfast club clothes like we're not going to still do that Right. Oh, and they should not have I mean the movie's fucking stupid, but then they added like I mean, the whole movie is fucking stupid. But then they added like our points to the whole end of the movie.

It's so fucking funny. So they give us like, here's what happened to a bunch of characters. It says, one teacher got shot with one of the stray bullets that the guy had in a pile that exploded and started going everywhere. It lodged in his shoulder. It actually hit his spine a little bit. I guess his ancestors really hated him. It also said he was back at school three days after getting shot, which is like a really

damning indictment of the American medical system. He would go back to work. I got shot three days ago. Right. We also get the story of the heroic teacher who wanted to like blow the guy to get rid of the kids out of the building. The heroic teacher got pneumonia from smoke inhalation and died slowly and painfully with a horrible, horrible respiratory problem for the rest of her life. And also, by the way, had her undoubted, unquestionable heroism and being the last person out of the room diminished a level to hell by pretending she had help from fucking angels.

Right? There's also that. There's a lovely point as well where we find out that the daughter of the terrorist, Hannah Utah, and those enthusiastic accidental terrorists, it says they didn't get charged, and it says they have tried to live out their lives in anonymity, and I just really wanted a line below that saying, but some asshole keeps making films about them.

Yeah, right, yes, exactly. You thought I was going to be in a new attack? I was going to be in a new attack. And then the last thing they show us, this is insane to me. It says, in in text other times a bunch of kids got killed at schools from terrorism. We don't know why. I can tell you it's because you God doesn't exist. I know the answer. Why put that in the movie? Because because they feel like they nailed it with that next bit where it says, and I quote,

yet even in Christ's day, not every leper was healed nor every blind person made to see. And I'm like, I agree. Christ was a dick. Yeah. That's a thinker. What the fuck? Basically, nonetheless, God is mostly nailing this. Think about how many kids he didn't blow up though of all the kids.

Oh, yeah. And on that, the fucking movie ends and we have to propusely thank Mars for making jokes about that with us this week. And thus, preemptively ending his chances of a career in politics. Mars, thank you so much, sir. Oh, thank you. Thank you so much for putting me through this. Let's do it.

I'll beat one next time, right? Yeah, right, right. Well, tell you what, basically, they're all more upbeat than this. So we've got that. And of course, if you want to hear more from Mars, check the show notes for links to his shows. Be reasonable and skeptics with a K. And while that does it for our review of the Cokeville miracle, that doesn't do it

for the episode just yet because we still need to pay next month's bills too so he'd tell us what's on deck. Mr. Krueger is this real? Yeah. Mr. Krueger's Christmas. And we're doing a Christmas movie in June because Eli's back next week and he wanted to. All right, then, okay.

Well, now it all makes sense. So with that to look forward to, we're gonna bring episode 253 to a merciful close. Once again, a huge thanks to Mars for hanging out and a quick reminder that you can hear more from him by checking the show notes for links to be reasonable and skeptics with a K. And perhaps even huge of thanks to all the Patreon donors

that helped make the show go. If you like to get yourself among their ranks, you can make a perhaps a donation at patreon.com so that's got awful, and thereby earn early access to an ad free version of every episode. You can also help a ton by the little five star review and by sharing the show on all your various social media platforms. If you enjoyed this, you'll be sure to check out our sibling shows, this is getting a de-instituted D&D minus A on the Skepat for Grad available wherever a podcast lip. If you have questions, comments or cinematic suggestions, you can email gotoffemoviesgmail.com, Legal Services for this podcast, provided by the law, offices of B. Andrew Taurus.

Tim Reversed and take care of our social media, our theme song was written and performed by Ryan Slotting. We will trust some Mars of the music was written in the poor by our audio engineer and Morgan Clark and was used for permission. Thanks again for giving us a check your life this week for He's in right near LaiBos, to go out and know allusions from store card earned on the truck next week until then. We'll leave you with a breakfast club clue. Everyone who died in Columbine High School and Newtown and Stoneman Douglas and like 200 other places, they all deserved it.

According to this movie, we just don't know exactly how, but they deserved it. Yep. What David thought was the key to immortality turned out to be the equation to make the calculator say boobs upside down. Mars continued to be thankful to live in a country where crazy people generally don't have access to guns and bombs. I don't want to talk to you. You know, it really is. I really was.

I was trying to find a think of another one you haven't come up with, and I, I'll have to then try and drop it at the end, and I could not find one. Damn it, it was killing me all day. Ha ha ha ha. Also, I've defeated DeathQD, is the strapline for our first conference

back after coronavirus. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha That would be a great theme actually. That would be awesome. Everybody gets a sword or a site. No, you should get a site. The preceding podcast was a production of Puzzle and the Thunderstorm LLC copyright 2020 all rights reserved. Copyright 2020 all rights reserved.