God Awful Movies - 395: Exorcist II: The Heretic

Episode Date: March 14, 2023

We're joined by Katie and Allen of the Werewolf Ambulance podcast to talk about arguably the worst drop off from original to sequel in Exorcist II: The Heretic. --- Check out Werewolf Ambulance and connect with Katie and Allen on Twitter @werebulance. --- If you’d like to make a per episode donation and get monthly bonus episodes, please check us out on Patreon: http://patreon.com/godawful Check out our other shows, The Scathing Atheist, The Skepticrat, Citation Needed, and D&D Minus. Our theme music is written and performed by Ryan Slotnick of Evil Giraffes on Mars. If you’d like to hear more, check out their Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/EvilGiraffesOnMars/?fref=ts All our other music was written and performed by Morgan Clarke. To hear more from him, check him out here: https://www.morganclarkemusic.com/

This made me so sad to see this star of stage and screen, the man played fucking hamlet. Just stupidly hitting a box with a crudge. Yes, I was an experienced and celebrated Shakespearean actor. Is he a good actor? Yes, fair question. Is he a good actor in this? No. No.

Okay, counterpoint, there are moments. Counter-counterpoint. I think he thinks he's in a different movie than every time he's in a different movie. For sure. For sure. Not a full movie. Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby Booby I'm amazing, Heath. Excellent. And we also have first time guest, massacists Katie and Alan of the We'rewolf ambulance podcast Katie Alan. Welcome to the show. Thank you.

Thank you for having us. Very excited. And we have quite the selection. So Katie, tell us, what are we going to be breaking down today? We watched the Exorcist too, the heretic. It's the story of what happens when a priest who is losing his faith and a child with religious trauma, do a mind meld and the result is locust.

Yeah. It is. It's a lot. It's a lot of locusts. And Alan, how amazing would you say this movie is? Fair to middling? Is that an amazing amazing? Amazing.

Yeah, man. He's wrongly disagree. I enjoyed the fuck out of this movie. The watching of this movie was much better than our average watching experience. I'll say that. Oh, I'm sure. I'm sure you guys watch a lot of movies and hard ones. They quote there.

Yes. All that being said, Eli, how bad was this movie? Well, if you loved the exorcist, but you wish it involved more hypnotism, Shakespearean masters and the white man's burden, you will love this movie. This is your grandma describing the black neighborhood. It's rough. This movie is so racist that I was like, okay, this must be real, right? There's no way they would invent something this for no pin. They made it up. They made it up. And it's real bad. All right. So before we get started for anyone who hasn't heard it already, can you all tell us about

where Wolf ambulance a little bit? Sure. Where Wolf ambulance is a horror movie review comedy podcast that we have been doing for about eight and a half years now. We just we just recorded episode 420 last night. Nice. So there's a enormous amount of episodes to listen to. We are not a place to go to if you want information about or is our motto is being fun

is better than knowing things. Absolutely agree. And we've had a great guest or two. Yeah. I was on a bit seriously. I am I have been so excited to have you guys on this show for literally since I met you being on Werewolf Ambulance. I listened to Werewolf Ambulance like I am, I am almost through your entire backlog.

That's how much I love your show. So thank you. If you're listening to this show and you want to hear people who make me deeply, deeply jealous with how funny they are, go ahead and check out Werewolf Ambulance. Oh, stop. And if you want to hear the one of the raunchiest episodes we've ever done, I suggest listening to the one that Eli guessed it on because we still reference our boy come agreement. Oh, I can't say it out loud. He can't say it. You guys brought up boy come. I was just

rolling with the boy come. Don't, don't know that we did. That felt very unified in that response. I feel like you guys went over there. There was an official statement written and check. We did not think boy come. He's quick. Move on. I'm at format. I'm strong recommend on where we'll family. Lens everybody check it out. So end boy come. Is it awesome? I don't know what that is, but I feel like I don't recommend it. Just based on context clues. I mean, you know what boy come. Yeah. Yeah. He's what you take your guess. What do you think? Boy come is. Oh, I think you were saying boy, con and it sounded kind of bad. That's it. Okay. Now,

it's, you know, it's really bad. No, it's all worse. Okay. Hey, let's talk about our thing. Maybe we were exorcist. Is there anything you'd like to nominate this one for being the best at being the worst at? I would like to nominate this movie for being the best worst airport impulse buy for that dress shirt that father Le Mans is wearing in the scene immediately when he returns to America. When Sharon opens the door and he's wearing a suit like the very tight priest suit with an African printed dress shirt under it. I screamed. It was not the only time I screamed, but I fucking screamed.

This is a dashi key. No, it's not. Stop saying that. Yes. I was going to say he might as well spend the rest of the movie walking around it at a dashi key, saying like, you know, when I was in the Congo, no, no, no, Richard, but absolutely not. The fact that the dashi key was hidden underneath a Western style sports code. It's like just a little bit, just a flavor. Unferred flavor. Jared Kushner and Body Armor.

It looked ridiculous. It's like an ocean city Maryland hoodie that he bought on the board. Exactly. Yeah. All right, Alan, you got a best worst for this movie? Yes, I would say the Mud City miniatures, which is also the name of my event. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. It's the name of my minor league baseball team. Yeah. So I'm glad that they're not going to conflict. Toledo Mud City Mud Hens. Toledo Mud Hens, yeah. Yeah.

Absolutely. Fuck yeah. I never get to talk about. Yeah, we never get to talk about the Toledo mudhands. I've been saying that for years. Eli's weird about it. He's like sports. Boo. Anyway, sports. Boo. For best worst, I was going to go with best worst giant rolling screw. Interesting. So part of the movie is set in some sort of like children's hospital scenario. And I think as a toy or a therapeutic object, there is a giant screw like the size of a

person and they roll it around. Yeah. Is that a real thing? I don't think so. I want one of these regardless. It seems super fun. I don't know so. I want one of these regardless. It seems super fun. I don't know. Maybe it would be therapeutic for me. Can I just say this is the kind of thing we're wrong about and we get three emails from like licensed clinicians being like actually it's called

the Vundermenbottom and it's really helpful for kids who have PTSD related to automotive. And I've got to be like, as I was not intending to hurt the feelings of people, we don't know these the answer. It's so distracting. They're trying to do like serious scenes about exorcisms. And then that's right behind a mischievous screw getting rolled across the frame. And I'm like, I can't pay attention to anything other than that. I want one of those.

It's for the kids who could never find the three eighths wrench to hand to their father. Yeah. So disappointed. And you have heath of a couple of turns with that one. And I'm going to take the easy one. I'm going to go with best worst falling. Oh, Lord.

We'll talk about it when we get to it. It's the greatest. They fall badly in this movie. You'd think that wouldn't be that hard, but it's bad. It's bad. All right. I think we're going to take quick break to get ready for this whole thing. And then we'll be back to tell you all about Exorcist 2, the heretic.

All right, everybody. Welcome to the first writers' room meeting for Exorcist 2, the heretic. Ooh, I love that title. Yeah, yeah, I'm really excited. Came up with that in the shower. Now all we need is a movie to go with what I thought of in the shower. So, what do you think of him? What about an origin story?

Love it. It's like how the girl got possessed. Yeah, exactly. Like, what if it turns out it was an ancient demonic spirit that Father Marin had actually met before? Oh, I mean, I guess so, isn't just the devil in the first movie? Yeah, but, you know, we never said that. So like this spirit could be an evil spirit of the air named, I don't know, Poopy Pants.

What? Sorry, did you say Poopy Pants? Yeah, you see, Poopy Pants realizes there are miracle healers being born all over the world. So he's got to possess them and kill them to stop their magic power. Okay, sorry, this is just getting really far from the original story, you know what I'm saying? Poopy pants?

And James Earl Jones is a former possessed kid who lives in a mud city in Africa, they have those. But yes, Jaguar powers that poopy pants is afraid of. And he's gonna help fight poopy pants. No, no, he will not help in any way, shape or form. Because actually the priest to the movie is about connects to poopy pants using a hypno machine and the original girl. So he has to physically murder her in doppelganger form

at the original house. All right, well, that was all nonsense and entirely disconnected. But we only allowed it this much time for the meetings, so I guess we're going with that. Nice. Can we at least come up with a name other than poopy pants for the demon? Only if it's equally silly. Alright, you guys ready to record? Yeah, almost, but Keith, before we do, there's something I need to tell you.

Okay. See, Katie and Alan here, they're my funny phone. Sorry, your funny phone? Yeah, I know. Years ago, I was able to keep up with all the japes required on our shows, but these days it's just been too much. That's why I hired Katie and Alan to be on all of our calls silently and give me great jokes so that I can continue to be the heart and soul of our podcasts. It's true.

Yeah. Okay, what do we say heart and so what? It doesn't matter. How has that not been costing you a fortune to do that? Oh, well that part's easy. You see, I have Mint Mobile. What's Mint Mobile? Really?

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You're tall. You guys get that advice a lot? Yeah. Hmm. We're still in a fight. And we're back. And we're gonna start off with a list of old timey actors that I have never heard of,

but Eli seems pretty excited about some of them. Come on, Richard Burton, Linda Blair. No. James Earl Jones, Darth Vader. Okay, I've heard of James Earl Jones, but nobody else. Louise Fletcher, best actress, Oscar Award winner is in this piece of shit. I'm sure it is. Nice. I'm devastated for her throughout this movie because you know she was on the cast because is in this piece of shit. Outch. Nice.

I'm devastated for her throughout this movie. Because you know she was on the cast because she looks like Ellen Burstin. Yeah. Can we also point out that the opening music to this sounds like demons doing a mean, yoko, ono impersonation? See, I thought it was giving

Diamanda Gales vocal warm-up vibes. Yeah, I felt bad for the orchestra that had to deal with this because it was clearly like, here's the music note, somebody's going to be doing crazy fucking screams. I don't know, do some orchestra stuff for that. And they did the best thing good. But it's the 70s. They were like, it's a Wednesday. No, I'm not sure.

And they're going to be wearing clothes. Nice. Good week. Good week. Good week. Right. So we're at an exorcism of some sort and a priest shows up and he checks to make sure he's got the, the right magic words.

He's looking in the Bible. Make sure he's got it. This is father Lamont. He's going to be our main character. And he goes over and he throws some holy water on a woman who is clearly possessed, but also claiming she's a healer and doesn't deserve this. Yeah. Also, it appears that he's doing this exorcism in the trash compactor of the Death Star. Is that what this is? I just can't imagine doing my job so poorly that watching another human being burning

to death and then slowly walking back outside of the room, mumbling, probably, probably perfect. And leaving. Yeah. He's just like, oh, that went badly. Ah, fuck it. And he just leaves. Yeah.

So the fire happens because the possessed woman, she like turns into the demon all the way and gets up and there's candles everywhere. So she like flips all the tables with candles and the whole room lights on fire and she lights on fire and she's demon. Yeah. My note here is don't have demon weapons right there next to the demon that you like. Oh, let's just set up our, you know, collection of flaming swords only wieldable by a demon. Oh, she grabbed and she grabbed her. Yeah. This room appears to be made of two things things candles and ribbons. So I don't know what they were really expecting. I'm going to stop you there because about half of the candles were actually just flickering Christmas lights like nobody would notice. They did. Yeah, we were. Can I say that the motto for the exercise to the heretic was nobody's going to notice.

Exorcist to the heretic was nobody's gonna notice. Okay, so everyone on fire and then cut to a very jarring new scene. It's a tap dancing audition. And a tap dancer named Reagan. She's one of the other main characters. She's a dancing around and she's flirting with the Barry sex guy, which I kind of enjoyed. They're doing a lot of Broadway. Now, to be clear, Reagan is played by Linda Blair, who was the little girl in the original movie, right?

Yeah. This is only four years later. Exactly. But unfortunately, she has grown up to be Amy Schumer using the bold glamour TikTok filter, and that is all I am able to think of the rest of the film. It is working for me. I'll be honest. She's a child.

Yeah, thank you. Wait, no, she's all done. Hold on, hold on. I mean Amy Schumer, the adult. Wait, what? What happened? Sounds like we might have a pizuzu on our hands. But you know what we won't have on our hands?

Any boy come. Excellent. Brought a full circle. I was gonna do it and then I didn't wanna bring that back, full circle. That's fine. Brought a full circle. I was going to do it. And then I didn't want to bring that back full circle. That's fine. I'm proud of you. We talked about what I'm here for to bring back the cuttable material to call back some other people's podcasts. Yeah, we talked about boy come earlier. I'm not sure the context, but that's the game for today. Apparently. So there we go. So we

finish up with the little tap dancing audition. And then Reagan shows up for a meeting with her therapist, Dr. Tuscan. This meeting is in a medical facility that appears to be on the Starship Enterprise, but they know. It's very confusing. It looks like the future and the past at the same time. Yeah, it's like the weird old 70s shit, but there's doors that are like with like lasers and holograms. I feel like they were like, Hey, David Kronnerberg, do you mind if we borrow this for a little while and do a movie here? And he's like, well, I was going to have a baby come out of someone's nose in this later,

but I guess this is fine for now. Just don't get it messy because I'm going to get it messy. You know what I'm saying? Real messy. Also, I love that the people who made this movie, and we'll talk about how problematic they are in a variety of ways, but I love that the people made this. They were like, it's a school for smurf smurf's right there. There's a kid with Down syndrome. There's a girl who appears to be deaf later. someone will have autism, which this movie is pretty sure is a stutter, right? And also Reagan, who was once possessed with a demon. So come on down to therapist Shack of Broken Brains, where we'll put you in an octagon and raise a beat beep over you.

For sure, 100% in the original script by whoever the fuck wrote this, it was like, orphan asylum. You get it, right? And they like had to make that. It's insane. Yeah. So this is where we meet the another main character, a ridiculous machine. It's a nightmare, hypnosis, mind melding machine, hypnosis, machine, synchronizer. And you can hook two people up and they can both explore the memories of demon stuff in the one person. Oh, man. And everyone just accepts that this is real.

Yes, there is no question. I was like, so you invented this out of a fan belt and some thumbtacks and it, it works. It works. All right. That's what's up. The buy-in that this movie does is glorious, right? It's like, oh, no, I can see you, the audience might be skeptical. There's two lights. They go boop-boop. You got to get your boops to match. And then you can see each other's dreams. And also Africa.

Any questions? I thought not. Let's roll on with the film. Yeah. So we see that ridiculous thing and they decide, okay, we're going to use this tomorrow at our next meeting. Mm-hmm. And then we cut to a Catholic church where a cardinal is meeting with Father Lamont, and the cardinal wants Father Lamont to investigate the death of a different priest named Father Marin who died during an exorcism. Yes, and this is the priest from the first movie.

Oh, okay, I have not seen the first movie. Have you seen the exorcist? I have not. No, I know that's the one with the project of vomit, right? That's like all I know. Yeah, that is it. Okay, so Father Marin died in exorcist one. Yes.

Yes, got it. I should point out that if you haven't seen exorcist one, you are missing out on just how fucking batshit this movie is to be Exorcist too. We have a thing on our show that we refer to as the Poltergeist drop off, which is Poltergeist one to Poltergeist two, but this is my farest deeper drop. Yeah, I would say this is worth renaming because this when you watch the masterpiece that is the exorcist and then you because I idiot that I am I was like I like the exorcist I'll watch the exorcist the week that I'm gonna watch. Exorcist too. Watch the exorcist I was like such a good movie

so scary and watch this movie the entire time going I don't think anyone who made this movie saw the original exorcist not a single person. They did but the guy who directed this hated the original. Oh. So he was like, I can do something different. I can do something totally different and he did. The original Jones hasn't even spat at Andrew. And this movie makes no fucking sense.

Oh my God. Oh fucking, he was just hitting a never, an everlasting gobstopper and had to hook it into a pool. He was like, I was saying a cocoon, which is, it's a fruit in Africa. was just hitting a never an everlasting gobb stopper and had to look into a pool. I was saying a cocoon, which is, it's a fruit in Africa. Well, yeah, you're probably right. But I don't think it actually was. I think it was intended to.

I saw tomato. Yeah, I think it was actually tomato. There's going to be a weird tomato spitting thing. I mean, we'll get to it when we get to it. But pin and Katie's not deep in extensive knowledge of African fruits. Yeah. We're pulling that pin out later in the film.

Absolutely. That is the extent because I googled it. Okay. So they're having this meeting and the cardinal is like, all right, the theological college, which is something that does science in their head. They decided this was a demon killing a priest. And we also decided Father Marin was a satanist. So what he needs Father Lamont to do is prove that Marin was not a satanist so that they can publish the books of that

guy. And that's the mission to investigate that and prove he's not a satanist. Yeah. I'm sorry. How did you hear anything they were saying without just staring at those fuck boys hanging on that cross those crosses behind the? Yes. Those two were so smoking hot. I missed smoking hot Jesus' ass. Wasn't it? It was like the, it was the two bros on other side of the thief and the whatever.

I was like, yeah. Whoever painted that, they like got a talking to when they started to make Jesus to ripped. He was like, man, you're making us a look about it. Don't make freezes too, Jim. And he was like, what about the two thieves though? He was like, you go fucking crazy, my God. You go fucking crazy.

What of them just like coily raising their leg up? Yeah. Yeah. I'll go ahead and say it. Hardcore pornography. I'm not afraid to say it hardcore pornography. You're not afraid to say it. Okay. Because I'm brave.

Thank you for your service. Yeah. Richard Burton. And I will always call him Richard Burton because he's the main character. Richard Burton agrees that he's going to investigate the exorcism of the first movie and prove that Father Marin is in a Satanist. Something like that. Yeah.

So they wrap up their meeting and then father Lamont shows up to meet with Dr. Tuskin about Reagan's exorcism that killed father Marin. So he's at the facility of some sort where she works. Mm-hmm. The futuristic old-timey facility thing. Right. This part of this movie is the strongest argument for why we needed HIPAA. Yeah, because basically Father Marin walks in and after showing nothing and saying nothing

Dr. Thornberg or whatever the fuck her name is, it's just like you are a part of this movie. The doctor is like you are a part of this movie now. Anyways, Reagan's repressed that time. She killed two people. And I think if she remembers, she'll fucking, if you know what I'm saying? So we're doing the hypno beam, want to play with us? And Reagan is watching them have this whole conversation

because everything is glass. There are no walls. People live here. We will learn people sleep here, which is very, very confusing. Also, I have to, it's just a tiny moment, but it makes me so happy. You know, they have to have this like skeptic versus believer moment where she says, like, well, you know, evil isn't real. And he says, no, no, evil is a guy. He's a, he's a goat angel and he lives in an underground fire. Rahiana is there with a guy on a leash and she's like, oh, okay.

Yeah, she's like, okay, but then she's like, okay, but you will be able to sit in on all the rest of my stuff for the rest of the movie. I'm a doctor. Oh, yeah, I can't, can't see a problem with that at all. That should be fine. I'm just going to go, yeah, I can't, can't see a problem with that at all. That should be fine. I'm sure you'll find it. No, hip-hop problems whatsoever. Although I will say I would greatly enjoy if there was just a guy sitting in and all of my therapy sessions being like, and we're just not even going to check if he's full of demons. We're not even going to check. Right. So the next day, Reagan and Dr. Tuscan, they're doing their nightmare hypnosis machine

thing. And of course, the priest is going to be sitting in for that because that's normal. And the idea is it's going to zoop the demon visions from Reagan into Dr. Tuscan's brain too, so she can help analyze them, I guess. Yeah. And the way the technology works, I found interesting. So the machine thing has a strobe light facing in two different directions, two directions, of course. It has, I think a speaker built in with a Theraman connected to it somehow. Boop, boop, boop. In the smoke alarm later in the movie.

Yeah. Yeah. It has all those things. Well, only when you get the high score, spoilers. Right. And the idea is if you line up the light flashy thing from one person to the other and the Theraman pitch from one person to the other, you share the brain stuff. So like one person, the light slows down for them and the pitch gets lower and then the other person has to like, well, so demon low and then they're together and they're melded up.

I feel like you just put more thought into that than anyone who wrote this movie, Dad. I mean, that that's how y'all podcast, right? That's what we're doing right now. We're thinking so we can podcast. Yeah, obviously you do, you get the boobs. Also, sorry, I just have to touch on this one thing. You're probably wondering, how do you get your boobs to match another person's boobs? I was wondering. And you kind of cat call them. It turns out.

Oh, yeah. So Reagan, her boobs start out low. I mean, she is the base in a four-part men's quartet. She is booping. She's booping in a very low, low, yeah, absolutely. So she has to go, come on. Get lower. More, be more hypnotized. Somebody's off.

Now we're at a minor second. You need to bring it down a little bit more. There it is. Yeah. And then they can see each other's boobs. So they finally sink it up. And Dr. Tuskin gets a little overload on the demon brain thing and starts having a heart attack.

Yes, she does. Not just a heart attack though. Oh, so much more than a heart attack. Yeah. Guys, quick question. When someone's having a heart attack, you grab their tip, right? Is that? That's how you control the heart.

First thing you do. I learned that in gym class in high school and CPR training. There's one part of the seed where obviously Linda Blair is trying to avoid this woman's breast and her fingers are sprayed spock style like going up and around the bosom. It's just very funny. Yeah. Doing it for a long time. It's so long and you could see both actresses being like, come on, guys, someone say cut. This is Chris. So focused on the boob grab that I almost missed that superimposing of the scene from the

first movie where Dr. Tuscan becomes father Marin. Right. I was like, why are she grabbing her? Who is that? Yeah, so she starts having the heart attack, and they're dealing with her in like real life, but also the demon mind meld things happening. So regular Reagan and old time past ghosts, demon Reagan in the mind meld are actually,

they have like a hand fight over the breast at one point. They do. They do. They're like crap. Like let me just start using it. It's like Keith and I fighting over which seat in the car we're going to sit in. I call the middle. I call the middle. I will turn this doctor around if you don't come.

Also, at some point, somebody's heart gets pulled out of somebody's chest. I wasn't clear on oops, but it wins or loses or something. Does anybody know what happened there? That's Dr. Tuscan's heart. That's what Reagan was trying to hold in by grabbing her boobs. It's like, that's where your heart lives. I'm just going to go with food. Got it.

And Heath, can I say, I appreciate your decorum, but I'm as brave as I am hurtful. So I have to say her heart does not get pulled out. Her heart gets fingered. It's very clearly a fingering situation. Okay. Yeah. Just a light fingering. Weird. Is it just me? I'm the only one who saw the fingering motions on the heart? No, there's some flicking of the heartbeat. I'm not saying it was masterful heart fingering. I'm saying, this is like, you know, this is, if I can say it, this is boy-com level heart fingering going on.

There it is. This is fumbling someone's heart in the back seat of a 57-shit. Yeah. And speaking of which, this is where Father Lamont jumps in. And he's like, I got this. I got some priests.

Don't worry about it. How? How? How? He just puts on the headband and he's there, I got this, I got some priests, don't worry about it. How, how, how? He just puts on the headband and he's there. Well, she's fribrating so obviously. Yeah. Is that how it turned out? That turned out to be all we all use everyday,

fribrating. Sure. We're emulating. But he doesn't focus at all on that scientific word. He's like, I'm gonna talk you out of having a heart attack by saying priest stuff. And that works, I guess. Yeah. And then they, you know, they shut down the mind meld. From there, we cut to Reagan helping

some kids at this facility draw on a big, he's a paper thing. So I guess she gets treatment here and it is also a worker here. Yeah. Unclear-Ragan is simultaneously getting therapy and also one of the therapists in this giant exagon thing. By the way, this scene where they're like expositing about like, oh, that was very concerning. Yes, I was very concerned. This is where the kids are starting to roll the giant screw around at the background. So this is where a giant screw up.

It's 100% of everyone in this podcast notes are giant. I did not watch the rest of this. No. I don't want to be the pedant in this, but they're rolling a giant nut. They are, you know what I was doing is a giant nut. I kept saying, no, you're right. It's a nut. Yeah. It's these kids in a BC situation are rolling a giant nut around. Yeah, that's true. Yeah, it's a big octagonal life size nut. And that's boycott. That's her boycott. BC for boycott. I was like, oh, ain't shit. And then I was like, no, it's a boycott reference. Okay, so very important rolling nut scene, whatever. I don't know what happened. From there, Liz DeNur nurse grabs the drawing from Reagan.

Reagan drew Father Lamont during the drawing session. So Liz the nurse grabs that and shows Father Lamont the picture that Reagan drew. And in the picture, he's a demon on fire. And immediately the other Lamont knows what this means. The nurse is like, she draws well. Like, yeah, she sure fucking does. She does. Yeah.

Yeah, it's also, if they've stylized it in the weirdest, silliest possible way, if you ever seen those like portraits at the top of New Yorker articles, that's what she's got. It's so strange. But for some reason, Richard Burton interprets this. He's like, all right, well, let's see. She drew me with some flames behind me, which means, and I'm not making this up, something in the basement is on fire.

He knows how does he know? Why would you know? There must be a fire somewhere. Why would the prophetic drawing be so vague about the fire? Why wouldn't it just be like, draw the fire where it is? I don't understand. I mean, it doesn't look anything like him, so it could be interpreted in any way you wanted to be.

I was sure that he had set this fire earlier to like go off at a certain time somehow, so that he could be like, see? Puzzle was over. Click a shitty magician trying to hide a card in your grandfather clock. No, no one would've come in Yeah. This is for a prophecy later. That would imply that this man who has never done anything properly in his life set a plan and it stuck to it the entire time, which

he does not do ever. Good point. Absolutely not. But there was a fire. Yeah. They go downstairs into the basement and find a fire that was just happening because the I know the prophecy knew that the fire was going to be there. So Reagan can draw demonic prophecies and the buildings on fire and father Le Mans, the priest decides to beat up the large fire for a little bit here. Be the fire and look, I know that you can concuss fire away, but you can't concuss fire away with a fucking crutch, okay? There's a big difference between blanket and paddock something out and what Richard Burton

does for the next six minutes, which is what I can only describe as a crime against the cardboard box. This made me so sad to see this star of stage and screen. The man played fucking hamlet. Just stupid hitting a box with a crutch. Yes, I was an experienced and celebrated to experience actor. Is he a good actor? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Is he a good actor in this? No. No. Okay. Okay. Counterpoint. There are moments. There are most of the time he's mailing it in like everyone else in the cast,

but there are a couple moments I have it in my notes where he's like, let me bring out a little of the H dog. Whoa. In many ways, it's sadder. Counter counterpoint. I think he thinks he's in a different movie than every time. For sure. For sure. And he's also just waiting for lunch. Yeah, sure. Right. So they finally, I guess get the fire a little bit out and they call the fire department. Everybody evacuates. Fire department shows up and deals with it. And then Dr. Tuscan and Father Lamont talks to more.

Father Lamont explains how that was clearly, that was officially a demon fire drawing prophecy and that her headstrapy hypno machine is definitely real magic. So he needs to use it to fight the demon. Right. He has to go back into the matrix. Yeah. Yeah.

Okay. Exact words. He actually says this proves scientifically that there's an ancient demon locked within Reagan. The scientist does not agree or disagree with this, which I found upsetting. Interesting hypothesis. Tell me more. From there, we cut to Reagan's sleeping. And an echoey demon is going to take her flying into a doodly- do, which is very exciting. And we go into a doodly do. It's, this is very problematic. It's somewhere in the 1978 understanding of Africa, which is rough. We literally fly through

a museum exhibit of like African stereotypes made by Rudyard Kipling. Yeah. Yep. Yeah. And we see father Marin doing an exorcism. So back in his past, I guess he was doing missionary stuff in vaguely Africa. And he was exercising a demon. And there's a locust with a go pro on a selfie stick flying towards the little village where he's doing the exorcism. We see that for a while. I literally blurt laughed when I saw that locus and I have no. It's so silly. It's an idea why it happened. I love that. It's shockiest. The wobbly. Yes. Thank you.

Big wobbly ass. I would buy this stuffy. If they selling this bazoozoo stuffy spoiler alert I would buy one and give it to my toddler. Yeah The pop is a squish mouth like it for real is so silly It's definitely a living locus on a stick That they're moving along with the camera and it's very funny Because it's one leg is just like glued to a stick and sticking straight off its body. Like, this isn't how I fly. I don't fly like this.

I need an adult. Yeah. There was nothing in the beginning of this film that said no animals were harmed. And I think I know why. Yeah. So the point is that was a locust invasion that was about to happen in this village. And we see that for a second. And then we cut to Reagan waking up and she starts sleepwalking out onto her.

I'm going to call it a personal dove balcony in her like a $1,000,000 Manhattan apartment. So now I'm confused about several things. One, Reagan apparently lives in a $48,000,000 New York City apartment. So now I'm confused about several things. One, Reagan apparently lives in a $48 billion New York City apartment ridiculous. Her balcony contains a steel box made statue covered in birds. And more importantly, her railing is I'm going to go ahead and say giving it about 30% of it's all. Yeah. I'm pretty sure that bird thing is a dub gym so that they can look at themselves while they're working out. That's why it's mirrored.

Everything is mirrored in this movie is insane. A lot of mirrors. Also, it's a minimalist railing. That's an artistic thing that they do, I guess. I don't know. Well, I think a good idea with railings is to have like one here and then maybe like a gap and then like another railing here and nothing on the corner. A summer railing, summer here, summer there.

That's like the Miles Davis of railings and safety devices. That's the railing he's not playing. It's the railing you're not putting up. It's about the spaces. Yeah. Katie, as a fellow parent, did this railing give you tremendous anxiety the entire time? I spent this entire scene just clenching my stomach. Yeah.

Terrible. Why do she live there? She sleepwalks. Yeah, not a good idea at all. So she does actually sleepwalk all the way to the edge of this thing where the railing is not almost falls off the edge, but then one of her doves from her personal dove balcony, like flies up in her face and wakes her up just in time to not fall off the edge.

And she screams. And then we see Sharon run out onto the balcony. I had no idea who Sharon was. I was like, okay, she has a roommate at her millionaire apartment. That's weird. I looked it up. I guess if you saw the other movie, the first one, you might know this. Sharon is her tutor and lives with her. Right.

Yes. Correct. She's very minor in the first movie. Yeah. And more importantly, she's the only one willing to come back for exorcist suit. They were like, fuck, okay, who can we get from the first film? Well, I played the tutor. I'll do it. And they were like, oh, all right, you've got a really big part, all things considered. This is a good point to bring something up about casting and who's not

in this movie. In the exorcist, Heath, you would not know this because you have not seen it. There's a character named father, Karreras, who is the ostensibly main character pretty much in the movie. He's not mentioned in this movie once. Now, he also died that night. Father Marin dies. Yeah. His death is, oh, sorry, spoilers if you ever see it, but his death is like the ultimate scene of the movie. Yeah. And Reagan has a connection to this man. Okay. And so the Vatican in the universe of this second movie, the Vatican was like, fuck that guy carries whatever. We'll investigate Marin's death, but that guy,

real glad he'd done from a demon. Father Marin was a real team player, which is why we will be looking into his death, right? Not anyone else's. Didn't you recently say on an episode of our show that Max von Zito has never been in a bad movie? You take it bad. Oh, so now I have to think this movie is good. Yeah. I really did enjoy it. Anyway, Reagan screams Sharon runs out onto the balcony and Reagan's like, oh, hey Sharon, I'm just doing normal dub, dub stuff, you know, whatever. Just checking out the dub gym, but a, uh, yep, but a gay sex in there. But it's, it's fine.

And we find out Sharon's about to head to Washington DC for something. And then we cut to that Sharon's standing in the rain. And she's about to meet father Lamont. They're in DC. And she takes father Lamont to the house where Reagan got exercise. I'm assuming as a kid in the first one. And this, this might as well be a walking tour of like God, the original exercise was good, huh? Remember how spooky the stairs were? Do you remember it?

We're on the sound, they do the original soundtrack for a second. And then the fucking screaming lady comes back in the room for more lunch break. And they were like, we weren't doing the original soundtrack. We were doing your cool, yummy thing that we all like and enjoy a bunch. It was called tubular bellies. We didn't do tubular bells. Just tubular bellies was something completely different. ours went down, down, down, down, down, down. And so she gives them a little tour and she's like, yes, I have trouble being away from Reagan. And I was like, yeah, no, I bet.

But Richard Burton is like, have you tried prayer? And she does like a, a prayer moment. But like, if I had seen a demon in person, I'd be a big prayer now. I'd be a prayer. I'd be a constant prayer. Yeah. You would have evidence. You know, yeah.

I don't know. I'd be a constant friend. You would have evidence. You know, yeah. I don't know. Anybody can spit pea soup. I'm scared. Also, I love the idea that the sort of babysitter tutor who was also there for this incredibly traumatic experience is now her caregiver. Like seems like she might be a little fucked up too.

She needs a paycheck. Yeah, I guess so. Yeah, she's actually like, hey, father, I have a whole lot of trauma from this crazy thing that happened to me and he's like, I'm not helping. I'm not helping with that. I'm not here for you. What's so weird?

I didn't come here to make friends. I came to win. Yeah, look, if you work for the Catholic church and someone says, I have a trauma from ex, you gotta get out, I'm not here for that really quickly, okay, that's company policy. Right, so at this moment, they're examining the room where that exorcism happened

when Reagan was a kid. And correct me if I'm wrong, there's a giant locust just hanging out in the corner of that room that nobody acknowledges, right? And they're treating it like a homeless guy who's making a scene and fucking, yeah, my God. We're just like, it's cool. We're just like two stops away.

Just like let the locus right through the, he's playing a drum. I don't really know. I just have a note that says, how my friend is back. I just had none of friends with that locus. Oh, you have a locus. You go way back.

You talk to Africa or Syria or whatever. Whatever. Who knows? It's all over there. Yeah. So I guess I guess it's an invisible giant Lucas in this moment. I don't know.

The priest is like, all right, well, I'm going to pray. I guess and he says, I pray for the, I don't know, the victims of the exercise, isn't it? But mostly for me, I pray for me because I'm the main character now. And at the end of that scene. And then we're back in New York City at the weird facility. And Father LeMont is meeting with Dr. Tusk and again to talk about what he found out. Yeah.

She hits on him all throughout this scene, right? Sure does. Big time. Super crazy. to talk about what he found out. Yeah. She hits on him all throughout this scene, right? Sure does. Big time. Super crazy. Why? So profoundly that I wrote in my notes, I know this porn. Interesting.

This movie could use a little porn, I guess. Yeah. It really could. But she also does this amazing punk where she's like, yeah, no, I have kids. And I'm also divorced, fucking say something. Yeah. But also, like, don't you ever need a woman? Yeah.

And the priest is like, yup. Awkward. And there's this weird silence. And I was like, love where this is going. Lean in. Because someone was yelling, Richard, you're supposed to say no. And he was like, fuck you, I might get laid. That hot's not going to finger itself. Richard Goddamn Burton.

Who's afraid of Virginia? Well, if I tell you what I'm not afraid of, the boom. This Taylor's kicked me out again. The VGG. Yeah. Daddy lonely. So they're having that insane interaction. And then Reagan finally walks in and they're going to do another mind meld. Oh, despite the hard attack last time. Yeah. Put it back on this vulnerable young patient. Also, can I

just say Reagan walks in as a total cock block, right? They're like, they're basically tilting for the kiss and Reagan's like, hey, hey, anyone looking for your ghost? Phil's with Dota Dota team man. Just dives onto the desk. What up? Oh, so they hook up to the machine. And now we can see stuff happening in Africa with Father Marin back in the day. And the locust swarm we see showing up at this village again. And we learn that it's because this little boy in the village is a magic healer.

And these locusts are somehow demon possessed and they attack magic healers. And what, what demon? I might as well have this little bit of what demon do they work for? Heath? That would be Pizzuzu. Pizzuzu. Yeah. The silliest possible demon name you could invoke

is what this movie will spend the rest of the movie saying with a completely straight face. To be clear, I looked up Pizzuzu and I was like, okay. Yeseerian demon king of the spirits of the air. Got it. Why are we in Africa? Why? Because Yassiria is a different place than Africa.

That's like Northern Iraq. I'm pretty sure, not Africa. But they think they're in Eastern Africa. I guess they're kind of mildly close location wise. It's not Africa. No, don't give them any credit. Pazuzu is vacationing. He's like, no, no, me and the family always come here. It's nice. These are my locusts. We do Disney World.

I think it all boils down to the fact that Pazuzu has a really cool statue with a really big dick. If you look at the Pazuzu statue, he's got a huge hog. When you Google Pazuzu, you understand why they went with Locust is the symbol for this movie. I did not spend enough time googling Pazuzu. No, I'm not talking to me there. Good to know. But in this flashback that Richard Burton is both describing to us and experiencing, we see he is bringing this kid, why we'll call Coquamo throughout the entire thing.

Because it's not a real name. I Googled, I was like, oh, I don't want to make fun of like an actual average. Nope, not. They were just like, Richard Burton was like, what about CoCoCo? And they were like, absolutely. We're using that.

No one from Africa will ever see a movie. What could be the problem with just making a racist noise for an average guy? But what we see in this flashback is he's dragging this kid who is currently possessed up a cliff to like a special cliff side temple. This is where we get my best work. So they get the kid up the cliff and the guy falls.

And I don't know if you've ever seen like bad Kung Fu, wirefu, where like they very clearly get caught for a second and hang there being like, I'm supposed to be over there. That's how this guy falls quote unquote off the clip. He's like, oh, not moving, not moving. I'm just hanging here. Oh, there we go. We're told later that they never find his body and father Le Mans like, it's right over there. It's right over there.

It's right over there. To none of you have white guy eyes? Cause I can use my white guy eyes. People can write a funny movie too. I feel like if you have a cliff side temple at a certain point, you get bored of helping people up and down from it. You're like, there's gotta be someone

who at every meeting is just like, I know I've said it before. I'm gonna say it again. Stairs. A set of, okay, you're all booing. You're all booing. You're all booing. Right.

So we're in the dream state of the nightmare machine mind meld and we see also Father Marin doing an exorcism on the little kid. And so the idea is we're learning from Pazuzu through Reagan into father Le Mans in the mind meld that Pazuzu attacked the kid because the kid is a good magic healer and Pazuzu Sadeemun who hates that. Correct. Here's my question. Why would Pazuzu explain everything? Why would he explain all this to the people in the mind meld? Great question. Because it's just like going to, it's going to be all the information

they need to foil him cosmically or whatever. Yeah. Also, what does Pazuzu like do? You know, what's his day to day if you're a Locust demon? What does Pazuzu, Padoo do if you will? Yeah. I mean, you know, look, you're making the wind and the sharp teeth that's killing people. That's what you're doing on your day to day. And sometimes you're like, you know, look, you're making the wind into sharp teeth at skilling people. That's what you're doing on your day to day. And sometimes you're like, you know what? I just can't lie anymore. Yeah, this is what I did. Can I tell you what I would have loved to include in this movie?

Real world-esque interviews with Pazuzu. It's like, you know, Pazuzu in a confessional. Right, exactly. Back at the house. Oh my God. I cannot stand Reagan. But he's the, he's the locus the whole time. I think that logo. I really thought this challenge was going to go better for me.

I've got to admit. What I'm in a room with Mario Lopez is like, Pazil. So tell me, what Tell me what were you thinking in this thing? Is it okay if I call you pass? Okay, but just to be clear, Pazuzu is in the locust with the GoPro and also in Reagan. Yeah, somehow both. Sure. Okay, and now Pazuzu decides he's going to take father Lamont to see the healer kid in the dream state universe. Sorry, sorry, I have to stop you, Heath, because I need to explain to the people who didn't watch this movie. By the way, watch this fucking movie.

Yes. Who didn't watch this movie with us. What happens? Pazuzu, the Assyrian demon goes, do you want to go see Kukumanga? And father fucking Lamont goes, yeah, sure. And he's like, all right, hop on. You're going to one second. I got to fly us there. And for some in same reason, they're on the same side for a second so that Pazuzu can properly expose it. I don't understand this part. Did they chat on the ride? What happened there?

I feel like they did. Yeah. Oh my God. Just Richard Burton and Pazuzu making small talk. So, um, is Elizabeth Taylor nice person? No. I kind of got that vibe. I kind of got Richard Burton is also extremely drunk and growing up off the side of the locus. The locus like there's a water and mints in the back. It's a bazooka. Yes. Fantastic. Where's that shirt? We're making that shirt.

The bazooka app. Yeah, love it. So I don't care if we make it more than one, we're making one shirt. We're sending it to Alan. So the more than one we're making one shirt. We're sending it to Alan. So Pizzouz are the demon. He's like, I'm going to take my Pizzouber app. You can come fly the teeth of the wind with me, share my wings. I'll fly you to this place in Africa, Slash, Syria, and give you all the information you need to eventually foil me. So they do that. And this is where we meet Kaku mo, the adult version

of the kid who's the healer, right? Okay, this is James Earl Jones, by the way, young James Earl. Voice of Darth Vader. And we meet him as the locust flies up. We're in locust cam for a second and then James Earl Jones steps out of a hut and goes to like headbutt the Locust. And then he's a leopard out of nowhere.

No. And that's the end of the scene. No, he yells a tiger roar. Yes, he does. I was a leopard bick. I screamed. It's fantastic. I left for a while. I left for a, I left so long I had to back 30 seconds twice to refine myself in this movie. Okay, so he can turn into a leopard or he can conjure a leopard. Yep. Yes, yes, he can. Both. Yep. Yeah, because later in the movie, he threatens to spit one out. He can also spit leopards. Good point. He's just a lot of leopard based stuff. Cool. Well, here's the thing, a young James Earl Jones just turned into a leopard or conjured

a leopard or something. So I'm going to need a quick break to process. Well, all this is affecting me like spiritually, sexually, all that stuff. And then we'll back with more exorcist to the heretic. C'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon,on, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon,on, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, c'mon, It's not what those are. Keith, be serious. We gotta get pumped. What if Alan and Katie decide they want a rumble? Sorry, rumble? Yeah, think about it. We have a movie podcast. They have a movie podcast.

They could declare a rumble at any moment. And even if we both try to take on Katie, Alan looks like a bite or a heath. Look, Eli, Katie and Alan are not gonna try to rumble us. But more importantly, if you're looking to get in shape to doing whatever those were, push ups, push ups. Yeah, fine. That's not the way to do it.

Why don't you try FitBod? What's FitBod? Great question. The FitBod app creates a workout program that's personalized to your goals, fitness level, and available equipment. It learns from your previous workouts and adapts to you as you improve. Wow!

Wow, is right. Just pick a fitness goal, select your equipment, and FitBod will create a custom workout program for you. Plus, the app switches up your exercises to avoid over-training or burnout while keeping your workouts fresh and fun. Okay, but that's got to be crazy expensive, right? No, it's not. A full year of FitBod is less than the cost of a single session with a personal trainer. All right, Heath,

I'm sold. Where do I sign up? Keep up your fitness habit with a personalized workout program from FitBod. Get 25% off your subscription and try the app free at fitbod.me slash gam. That's FIT BOD dot me slash GAM. Hey guys, you-T- B-O-D dot M-E slash G-A-M. Hey guys, you ready to record more podcast? Oh, yeah, sorry. We were just talking about one of our sponsors. That's odd because you should have been talking about this rumble. Bring it. It's biting time!

I told you! Minions gather to be. Yes, Lord Satan. What is your bidding, Master? A new opportunity for evil has arid and one of you must go and do our dark work. Yes, Master. Let it be I, Bal! No, I am on shall do it.

Actually, guys, I was thinking I would give this one to... Azuzu. Azuzu? Seriously? Look, I know he's a little different, but he's actually a very powerful demon. You know, he's from ancient Assyria, you guys. Assyria. He's so weird, though.

His thing is like... Locke. Locke? Exactly. Dude, demonic plans are foiled by like a citronellicant. Plus, plus he's always possessing kids. Kids, thank you. So weird. What are you guys talking about?

Possessing kids is scary, right? That's scary. Maybe, but it's also kinda, you know. Thank you. It's a vibe. It's a creepy vibe. Look, I've already decided I'm giving this one to Pazuzu, so I need you guys to be supportive and happy for him when he gets here, okay?

Fine. Sure. What up, what up, Pazuzu in the hizzer! Hey! Hi. Pazuzu. Right, Pazuzu, I have a mission for you. You see, you will stop the healers of the world before they can make me the devil. Stop my- Wait, wait, let me stop you there. Can I get in a child?

Yep, you can get in a child. Noice! Flexmaster peas in! That's so gross. I hate it so much. Don't give yourself nicknames. And we're back. When we left off, Father Lamont had just flown to Africa on a dream state, Locust Demon,

and saw a guy turn into a leopard. So they call timeout on the mind meld and Father Lamont tries to tell the story and he becomes like a Brooklyn guy all of a sudden. He's just like, yes. So I'm flying on the teeth of the wind with the locus demon and this leopard guy attacks us. So yeah, the healer boys alive, I guess, is the point. And they're all like, okay, scared the Pazuzu straight out of me. Let me tell you. Also, Reagan mentions that she saw Africa during the mind meld thing and well, again, no, it's Mesopotamia, but they're like, yeah, so Africa is important to this plot now and they call it a day.

And finally, the monster is like, okay, here's what I got to do. I have to go find the leopard man. And then that guy will teach me how to beat bazoo, zoo. If you'll excuse me, I must go off for a really unnecessary part of the movie like a whole chunk of the film's about to not matter at all. I'll be back. Right. Be back in a few scenes.

I bet a guy that I couldn't say Kokomo 4,000 times. So we're going to see what happens. So now it's time for Reagan to show her miraculous healing powers because if you thought the term mud city was offensive, wait till you see how this movie portrays Autistics. Who is the Autistic Child? That is one Dana Plato from different strokes. Oh, what? Yeah. Yeah.

Nice. Hey, you have failed in your role as the different stroke coordinator of our movie podcast. What you talking about Eli? Come on. Classic. But yeah, the way this actress portrays autistic, I would say is one step above. Yes, this poor child. I kept thinking of the director being like, no, no, it's more stutter.

That's what an autistic person dies. I'm a notistic kid once. More swar from her. Come on, don't make me say the R word, but it's the 1960s. I will. A lot. Come on. Do it. Okay. But the point is that Reagan's demon magic is making it so this girl can talk, right? Mm-hmm. Yes. The power of the demon inside her? Something. I don't know. So just to be clear, I'm keeping track of bazoos as powers here. He's Mester Vlocus.

He possesses people, evil tempter, and... Cure's autism. Cure's autism. That's kind. I mean, that's wonderful. Yeah. Yeah, it feels like a weird power set. He's a lot like I've remected it if you think about it.

Like I don't get down with Satanism like it's not my bag. But like it makes more sense to me in a lot of ways than like being Christian does on some level because like at least demons are like, I'm kind of a dick, but I'll do some good stuff too. Christian gods just up there and have an all, man, I just gave that kid autism great. We're going to perfectly good autism. I'm going to have to burn an entire city again on purpose. Yeah. So this girl is cured of autism by Pizzuzu powers somehow. And then we get Father Lamont telling Dr. Tuscan Pizzuz hours,

like, okay, well, demon possession clearly helps cure autism. Here's what we have to do. We have to fight the demon inside of Reagan because it's preventing her from reaching her full spiritual power. So the idea is that Reagan is also a healer like Kakuma, the kid. Yes. Also, we see the giant nut getting rolled across the back. We do. Yeah, no, it's hard to keep them. They sum up the scene right after it happens. And I'm not paying attention because they're doing the nut again in the background. So

yeah. So. Now, the only other thing you need to know about the scene before we move on is that Reagan here casually mentions that, because he's like, oh, I don't know where in Africa I need to go. And I'm like, it's because you need to go to a Syria, but that's fine. And she's like, well, I remember seeing it at the museum once. Oh, good grief. Yes.

And so they're at the Natural History Museum next. Yeah. And he's just standing at the gorilla exhibit. Like this is what this is what you saw. This is Africa. And I just want to point out that at the beginning of the scene, I wrote as a joke, he's walking around to see if he can find which African mud city Reagan is thinking of based on what she saw in a museum. I wrote that joke for our comedy podcast. Nope. That's just what the scene is. That is what this character. Oh, yeah. They walk up to a random exhibit of the African mud city of Mesopotamia, Syria. Right. And Reagan says to father Le Mans, he's like, oh look, that's where Father Marin fought

Pazuzu when we saw that just now in the dream machine. You remember the mud city? Did we say mud city enough? To be clear, the background of this little diorama in the museum is an illustration. Are we to believe that the museum accidentally recreated an accurate historical event about a demon and made an exhibit of it? Yeah. And in the back of, let's be clear, like a giraffes exhibit.

Yes. Right? They were like, they were painting the back wall of the giraffes exhibit and they were like, should we put that temple we saw in a Syria, Africa, Mud City here? And he's like, yeah, don't definitely. Let's work that into the background. We know Dr. Katz love a cliffside temple. We'll need the Mud City when we're doing that.

Yeah. Right. So they see that in about a month, like, okay, confirmed. I need to go find Kukumo and see how to beat Buzuzu. I'll go to this Mud City that we just learned about right here at this exhibit. You mean the thing you told us you were going to do in the last thing? Yes, but now I'm doing

it. It's confirmed now more extra. You're trying to hit two hours in your run time. So father of the month goes to meet with his boss at the cardinal guy about going to Africa to find Kaku mo. And he's like, so you remember the

prophecy about magic healers who purge all the evil from the world. I'm pretty sure this leopard spitting guy is one of those. And he knows how to beat the locust demon Syrian guy. And to his boss's credit, his boss is like, oh cool, cool, cool. Hey, do you remember that your assignment was clearing someone's name? What the fuck are you talking about man? Yeah. Yeah. And the Le Mans gets fired here. That's how you know you really fucked up getting fired from pre-sting. Yeah. Cause that does not happen. I love that he sends them on vacation. He's like, you must take a respite. And I was like, Oh, he's in pedophilia mode. I get it.

You just sort of automatically action. Yeah. I just went back in the game. You just put you to new church. So yeah, the Lamont is fired, but he's going anyway. Then we're back in New York and Reagan is hanging out on the extremely dangerous dove balcony and she's daydreaming about father Lamont, who is now doing demon detective stuff in Africa. She can see him. Yeah, they are now somehow psychically connected. And then I wondered if that was going to be forever, because that's going to be fucked. Yeah.

I had a thought that I was so proud of, which was she could see Father Lamont from her house, just like Sarah Palin and Russia. Topical. Topical. I liked it. I liked it. I liked it. I like you, you can cruise on Pazzozuber for a little while. Right. So from there, we cut back to Africa. And Father Le Mans, he's asking a nun in French

about a magical city of mud and gold that he needs to find. So stupid. Why? Why does this city? This is how stupid this scene is, right? He asked the none and she's like, I don't know where it is. And he's like, well, the plot is over right now. But luckily, a delivery man shows up. He's like, I know where everything religious is. That's my character. Hello. Goodbye. That's my character. Hello, goodbye. It's Ned Bady. What are you doing here?

It is Ned Bady. His name is Ecumenical Ed. I just know what calls it. And he knows all the useful information for this moment in the movie. And that's it. And then he's like, poof, gone.

Yeah. Can I say? I really want to see Ecumenical ads movie, right? Just slinging from town to town with religious iconography. Just moving Jesus pieces all over Africa. Yeah. So this plot device ecumenical ed, he agrees to fly father Lamont to the mud city of gold that of course he knows all about and the location of and he knows, yeah, I'll fly you right there. No problem.

It's like, oh, it sounds like Gypsy. Okay. Yeah. Right. Yep. The name of the mud city of gold is Gypsy. Thank God. It gets a name and they sub calling it the mud city of gold. This is how lazy the writing is in this movie as they're flying to Gypsy Richard Burton. I assume Richard Burton the actor and not the character goes, what now? And fucking, he's like, I'm going to take you to Gypsy and you can find Kokomo and he's like, all right, fine, whatever. Dick, we're Is that a rehab facility? Oh, not back to Gipty. It's okay because when they get there to this remote African village, there's a little baby golden retriever running around. Yeah, they're distracting. There might as well be fireworks and a hot dog stand. It's so weird. giant wheel of cheese shaped like a nut.

And whatever would distract me, yeah. Absolutely. This golden retriever was very distracting. So father of the mat, he looks around the village to find Kokumo for a while. Oh, God. He talks to a guard for a second in the local military. He speaks in French again. I don't think French is big in East Africa or

a Syria or northern Iraq, whatever. I think colonialism. Colonialism made a lot of French. Yeah. Look, this movie's accurate, okay. Sorry, no withdrawn withdrawn. It's very accurate. Guard doesn't know Cacumbo. Palamon keeps looking. Finally, he finds some people who are like, oh, Kokumo, yeah, yeah, we know where to go. And by keep looking, he is just wandering around going, Kokumo, Kokumo. Kokumo. Like he lost a dog.

Yeah, he might as well be shaking a bag. Yeah. Imagine showing up to Cleveland and just being like, Dave? Yeah, actually, Dave. And then a bunch of Cleveland people are like, Oh, Dave got you. And they take you somewhere. And Dave turns out to be a popular sex worker. And you're like, no, no, okay.

Not that Dave. This is indicative of two things. Either they heard him saying Dave and they were like, he probably means a prostitute or, and this is my pet theory, Kaku mo's name means prostitute. One of the other, sure. I felt happy for you guys here because I felt like you don't get many titties in your line of work. I know.

I was so excited for the boobs. Can I say I was a little, I'm not gonna lie. I've gotten to the age now where I see a young woman with her boobs out and I'm like, I'm just gonna Google. I've gotten to the age now where I see a young woman with her boobs at and I'm like, I'm just gonna Google how old she was. Oh, 30, all right, there we go. Yeah, look at those boobs. Because you can't be too sure with movies from the 1960s, you know what I'm saying?

We actually have a listener who kind of catalogs the boobs for us, the adult boobs to be clear. Jackie J, if you could give us that a little shot, definitely, Kukum from the popular sex worker in the mud city. Mrs. Skin, we call her. Yeah. That's it. That's it. Mr. Skin. What? You guys don't have, you don't have a listener who categorizes all the boobs in the movies you watch. No, but we do have a bell that was sent to us by listeners that we ring every time there are titties. There you go. Excellent. You gotta get a tittie bell.

Do you have a bell right next to you for that just now? Yeah, it's a tittie bell. It's a legit. Tittie, you actually have it. What's the resonance on this thing? That's great. Excellent. Eli, are you super jealous right now?

I'm so I want a sound board for years and Noah keeps saying no. I think it makes me sad. I think we should have a fully table for years and know what keeps saying no. I think it makes me sad. I think we should have a Foley table and just do physical things like. No, a wobble of saw. Yeah. Can my Foley table have the Sean Penn clip in it? Absolutely. Your Foley table can have Sean Penn on it.

That's true. Yeah, what's he doing? He's doing nothing. Not much. Getting in trouble. He getting in trouble with El Chapo. trouble. He getting in with El Chapo. Didn't you do something with El Chapo? Anyways, back to the movie.

Okay, back to the movie. So father Lamont, he finds the sex worker. That's not what he was looking for. So now he's praying for help to find the actual Kakumo that he needs to find. And Reagan is mind melding. And he's going to help also with the help of bazoo zoo the three of them are gonna help father Lamont find Kaku mo. Sometimes you got to pray to bazoo zoo.

Yeah, he just switches sides for a second. bazoo zoo's like again, I have I have Google maps if you're willing to switch sides. Yeah, and fucking bazoo zoo's and and Richard Burton's like fine, fine. Just for a minute, I'm on Pazuzus side. It's like an arch villain being like, ah, you guys are never going to find that my, my riddles are too hard for you. All right. I'll give you a little answer sheets here. This is no fun. If you don't find my stuff, just punch it into bazooka maps. Go ahead. Go ahead. to this works. And Kekumo finally gets found by father Lamont. Kekumo is sitting in a drippy cave area doing nothing with a with a big locust hat, which I enjoyed. Nope. I

liked the idea of wearing a hat based on your enemy. I think that's what I liked about it. Right. But imagine you made a locust costume for Elton John. That's the thing he's wearing. Like sure. And can we also point out James Earl Jones is fucking live it in this. Not the character. James Earl Jones, the actor showed up and they were like, so Mr. Jones, famous Shakespearean actor

and you great, great performer. Here's your, you're gonna say fuck you. Yeah, here's your loincloth. Fuck you and yep and Locust helmet had to be in so many racist ass movies. Yeah, so many race. I mean, he's in soul man top 10 most racist. We did that one. We watched that one. Yeah. That one. Oh wow. Oh, my God. Secular bonus. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Secular bonus racism. Yeah. Basically, see Thomas L. with the black face. Yes it is. Yeah. Yes, it is. Sure the fuck is. Yeah. James L. Jones is furious. He's just sitting there and

fond of Le Mans like, all right, I found you. I need your help. And then Kakumo is like, wait a minute. Did you have Pazuzu help you find me? That's fucking cheating. And it doesn't make any sense. Why would he help with this? You don't even believe in Jesus Christ. You should have asked Jesus Christ for help. And Richard Burton goes, fuck, oh, Jesus Christ. It's got a whole guy. Yeah. Oh, and I wear that little cross with him on. I was literally wearing a statue of the guy. That's on me. Yeah.

That is on me. But I am faithful. And so Kakuma's like, oh, you're faithful to Jesus Christ. Seems like you're not, but you're gonna have to prove it. I will need to prove it by having you do basically like the Tony Robbins Firewalk thing. Because Kakuma has a tiny, like, having you do basically like the Tony Robbins Fire walk thing. Because a

Kikumu has a tiny like a four foot long strip, not of hot calls, but of spikes sticking up like the size of a welcome mat area that he's like, prove you love Jesus Christ by walking across my spiky welcome mat. Yeah, I could have jumped that and I am not a jumping man. Yeah, but could have jumped that and I am not a jumping man. Yeah. But Richard Burton tries. He steps on the nails because why walking across the nail. So to be clear, just that there's spaces.

There's spaces the size of feet to miss. To be clear, it's lying on a bed of nails, not walking. That's a very different style. It's walking across calls, but they, they forgot this or Kukumo's doing a super good prank because he steps on it. He instantly gets nails in his feet and he falls down. Face first into the nails. Yeah, but they're not the nails, but they're not the nails. No, they're not. Oh, also this is the spitting the tomato or the very specific, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh,

uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, very specific. Oh, pop up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up up Okay, but like imagine it's your day because because James Earl Jones again, a claim doctor James Earl Jones does spit out this coco or whatever it's called. No, I mean, I think it actually ease the tomato, but go. Okay. Yeah, the prop is the tomato for sure, right? The prop is the man. Who do you think's job it was to be like, and then you're going to, and then you're going to spit a tomato. Do you mind? Mr.

Jacob, I can't hear you. Mr. Jones, I was just wondering if I know you're studying your lines for King Lear, but if you would just, I'm gonna say Ibid, do you remember when I said fuck you? Everything you said, I said fuck you. Okay, all right. No, but they get it, they got them to do it. So I didn't, I didn't understand this moment actually. He says, you know, the father of the moths about to walk the spikes and Kakumo says, all right, well, if Pazuzu comes for you, I'm gonna spit a leopard.

Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. What? What did that, so it was a test of whether Pazuzu was in father Lamont. So like the test is, if I spit a leopard, it's Pazuzu. If I spit a tomato, you're good. I'm going to quote my friend Katie from earlier. You are giving this more thought than they ever did.

All right. Well, he spits a tomato. I guess it's fine. You say tomato. I say leopard. Father Le Mans tries to do the spike walk steps right on the spikes and Pales's foot. And he falls down. He either pastor failed the test. I don't know. I think we're going to need a quick break either way to figure it out. But first, let me give back three, the hard sell.

Either way to figure it out, but first, let me give act three the hard sell. Will the a Syrian African locus demon who flies on the teeth of the wind tie up his business with a tap dancer in New York City? Will the leopard spitting Christian friendly shaman from Africa be able to help with that? Can a movie possibly go off the rails from there? Find out the answer to those questions is absolutely yes when we return for the exertastic conclusion of Exorcist II, the heretic. And if you'll follow me through here,

you'll see my favorite part of the apartment, the balcony. Wow, beautiful view. Excuse me, why are there giant gaps in the railing? You noticed, yes, this is very new American architecture. It says, I don't have a child and I never want to be visited by one. Right, right. And this statue. Oh, this is a pigeon box, actually. Sorry, this multi-million dollar apartment comes with a pigeon box. Is that what you said?

Pigeon box, yep. Pigeons around it. Maybe in it, you can put seeds on it. I mean, you can put seeds on anything. Yeah. Anyway, are you interested? Would you like the place? Well, let me ask you this.

My daughter, Reagan, occasionally goes into trances, bit of a fight with a demon. Do you think this balcony is a great idea? Oh for sure. Then we'll take it. Question, are there pigeons in the box? I don't know, man. What? Why don't you know? Oh, okay, Heath.

We lost that rumble in the last commercial break to Alan and Katie. Pretty hard. Yeah, Katie's crazy strong. I know, I know, but we're not out of the game yet. We could still impress them with our Raycon stuff. Oh, yeah, nice. Okay, D. Alan, are you guys ready for more recording?

Yes, sorry, I was getting the last of my bites out. Really? What do you think you'd be done with those? Not important. Did you guys see this? Ooh, those look amazing. Where'd you get all this stuff? We got it at Raycon. What's Raycon? Raycon is premium audio at the perfect price point, whether you're looking for a pair of everyday earbuds, low latency gaming headphones, or a speaker with a battery that will last all night at your next party.

Raycon's got you covered. Huh, you guys must be loaded. Uh, no, I have tens of thousands of dollars in credit card debt, Katie. But Raycon started half the price of other premium audio brands, so you don't even have to choose between products. You can get one of each or a pair and spare and still pay less than you would with some of the other guys. It's true.

I love the Raycon's earbuds. They sent us so much. I got their wireless speaker so I can blast tunes for everyone to enjoy. And don't forget about the noise isolation awareness mode and tap functions. Right, much like when Katie lift me over her head like Bane did to Batman, I will not forget. Ready to buy something small with a big impact? Go to buyraycon.com slash gam today to get 15% off your raycon order. That's buyraycon.com slash gam to score 15% off by raycon.com slash gam.

All right, guys, we're sold. Keith, I'm sorry about the lifting thing. Yeah, honestly, you got me out of the bite zone for a second. So no need. Kind of helped. And we're back. When we left off, Father Lamont tried to prove his faith in Christ by walking on a bed of nails and it went very badly, but it also worked. It's a weird test. As soon as he impaled his foot

on the spikes, he got zipped to a doctor's office and Kakuomo is the doctor there. a doctor's office and Kaku mo is the doctor there. Hey, hey y'all y'all what? What? What? What? What's happening? Standing over you in a lab coat like, hello. I love it. Here's what I think happened. I think they made him spit it to me when James O'Jones was like, you motherfuckers and they were like, fine, it was a dream sequence. And you get to be a doctor with glasses. Just stop punching Richard Burton. He was like, fine. I'll be back when there's a doctor's coat for me to wear.

I did the Malcolm X movie. They wanted to give him graying temples. You know, sort do the, the sophisticate. Instead there was just these gray like bride of Frankenstein strips. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, that's confusing. Also by the way, did I mention he's a doctor slash studier of locust, astrology. He's a doctor slash, fuck it. It's a locust lab also in addition to being

a doctor's office. And he starts explaining how locusts work. So the way they work is they become an evil swarm, but only if their wings brush against each other, because that makes some mad. And then they become like cannibalistic and crazy and evil and they swarm and they go after healers and villages or whatever. He seems to be proposing the mythology of this movie and I googled it because I think this is so stupid. There's no way that anyone thinks this is real. No, don't worry, no one does. The mythology of this movie is that locusts are just crickets in a bad mood. Right. He says that bugs

are evil so many times. So many times. Right in front of them too. They made you a doctor, but a dumb doctor. But then this is also where he introduces us to the I'm gonna say clumsiest metaphor of the movie they have evolved one Good Locust right and that locust is gonna chill everyone out and Edit out all of Eli's references to point out Children will be our agents in the swall. Yeah They they created a good locust who's just like, okay, namaste, everybody. Namaste, it would become down.

And that makes all the locusts in the swarm who would normally be corrupted by the wing touching and makes them all calm down. And if that one good locust is in the swarm, it's all good and that's going to solve the movie, I guess. Yeah, I could tell you from experience that I've never gotten more agitated when I'm upset and someone's like, Hey, man, just chill. Yeah. I that always calls me right to help.

Yeah. I really wanted to see him putting a little police cap on the good locust and releasing it into the NYPD. All right. See? Get that murder rate down. Okay. So we learned about the good locust and then we're back in New York and Reagan

gets out of bed and she breaks out of the clinic place that she was in. She's in a hospital bed in that clinic and she just leaves. She's not really allowed to. We see a plane landing and the movie was clearly trying to be artistic here, they show the planes wheels coming out and the plane, it looks like a locust. So. Oh, I didn't notice that. I just noticed that it was the reverse of the shot earlier when they show the landing gear going up. Okay, it might just be that.

I don't know. I feel like I've been overthinking it all day. I appreciate your effort to make this movie good. Right. So then we cut to somebody giving kids a bath at the million dollar apartment where Reagan and Sharon and Dr. Huskin live. That's not what's happening. It's so fucking confusing. We're over at Dr. Tuskens house where she's bathing her children. Wait, that's her? Yeah, I mentioned children. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. But Sharon's there too.

I think this is the apartment. I think Sharon and Dr. Tuscan and Reagan live in this apartment. Sharon just happened to be taking a bath in her own house. Sharon, there are two concurrent baths happening in two different places. What this movie presupposes is that two people can bathe at the same time.

Okay, yeah, I didn't think that was possible. I get it, I get it now, I get it now. this movie presupposes is the two people can be the same. Okay. Yeah. I didn't think that was possible. I get it. I get it now. Okay. Two different places. Whatever. I guess from there we cut to Sharon in the apartment where Sharon lives.

In the wettest robe I have ever seen. Okay. This is so upset. Thank you. I think about this robe and not because of the boobs. I think about this robe so much because I was like, is that what robes are supposed to be? I was like, because why else? She, the priest guy, he's back. He's got his cheeky shirt, which is fucking rules. He's got a locust hat. Just taking off, man, you've been wearing it all day. He's got a locus tat just taken off man. You've been wearing it all day. He's got it.

He shows up and she has apparently gotten out of the bath and is soaking wet under her robes. Now the purpose of this is so that we can see Sharon's boobs because Sharon was like, show you not letting me be in the first movie. I'm going to show them. Just in a second. I can panic and needle park assholes. But what it looks like is that she thinks robes are towels.

Yeah, looks so like a firm. Right. assholes. But what it looks like is that she thinks robes are towels. It looks so like a photo. Right. And the whole point of the scene was just for final amount to show up and Sharon to yell at him and be like, stop teaming hunting. Get out of my fucking life. I don't like you. You're not helpful. And that was it. Yep. And to show our nipples. I think I just show it. Okay, really just the nipples got it. So then we're back at the Museum of Natural History again. Shhh. You must have been a sponsor. Reagan after she broke out of the clinic. Yeah, she went right back to the museum. She didn't break out of the clinic. She walked out when it's okay. Yeah. It was like Reagan, where you going? She was like, stop. And she was like, oh, yeah, fine. Yeah. You're gonna miss big circle

Nuttime where we roll around, okay? So yeah, she goes to the museum and father Lamont finds her there very easily they bump right into each other again And she's like, so did you find the leopard guy with all the answers to our problems? And yes, he did he's like, yeah, all we got to do is fight the very concept of evil. And then we win We're good-locust. Yeah, and she's like, oh cool. So did Did Kukumo give you anything that you're gonna use to like fight in this final battle? No, no, no, no Just we fight evil pretty much just said it's your fault. Yeah, totally unrelated I was told that section was cutable except I'm

We're in this Dishikie underneath. So no problem. But Reagan's like, don't worry about it. I brought the fucking Scientology machine from the clinic. We can use the mind meld to win the thing or whatever. Yeah. And like a jeans west bag. I was real in doing I didn't know a Rapping bag. She's just like, oh cool. We got to fight evil. I brought this bag and I was like what the fuck does that mean? Okay, the machines inside got it. So Father Lamont and Reagan they go to some shitty hotel room in Manhattan to do the mind meld together Yes, I think the church cut off his per diem when they fired him. So now he's staying in like a

CD hotel. Right. The African-American people in the hallway, only ones in the movie, by the way, who won't be in a mud city, they are to indicate to us that this is a shady neighborhood. No, no, there is a black kid on stage with their tap dancing who keeps getting pushed off the stage. Oh, yes. Oh, man. Oh, man. Oh, in the, in the, in the previous scene, we see that, uh, Dr. Tuscan is on the move now to try and find Reagan and the machine. And I love it because she puts on half a vest. She's puts on one, one arm hole of a vest in his other door.

And I was like, it's just another armhole. Maybe it's just another armhole. You must have the time for a second armhole. And she leaves without the children. Yeah, but you know why she's searching for her because it's rake against the machine. Pfft. I'm sorry.

What? You like so happy about that? I'm so glad someone else can make a dad joke. I have. Here's how proud of that joke I am. I didn't write it into our notes. I wrote it into a post and stuck it on my computer and was like, and I don't bust this gold out too early.

Is it on a little board that says Eli's naughty thoughts? It is. Yes, it is. I've been there. Eli's great jokes. Yeah. Journal. So it's right against the machine. They link up in the mind melder machine in this weird hotel room and they see father

Marin and father Marin. I enjoyed this part. Father Marin's like, Oh, good. You're finally back in the universe where we talked through the dreams. I'm really fucking tired. You guys fight the demon now. I don't know. I'm done. And so now they're in charge of the plot because he passed it off in the dream universe. Yeah. He's sick of being a low rent professor X collecting all these special kids. Yeah. Around the world. And yeah. That's an X-Men reference from comic books for you. I liked it, Alan. It's no rig against the machine, but it's good. It'll do.

Super. Never forget. So, yeah, Father Marin quits in the mind, Meld world. The buzzer goes off on the machine, so the Meld is done. And Father Lamont just bolts out of the hotel room and runs out into the streets of Manhattan to go somewhere. We learn he's about to go to Washington, DC to go back to that house where it all began. Yeah. So to be clear, Richard Burton, Father Lamont has been taken over by Pazuzu, the demon spirit of the air. Oh, he's taken over now? Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, because of that last meld. Yeah,

because the last meld. And so he will now spend the rest of the movie commuting as the demon god Pazuzu. Yeah, we will watch the Pazuzu by train tickets. We will watch the Pazuzu get a little lost in the subway. We will watch the Pazuzu. The demon god hold up for a second because Reagan hasn't quite caught up yet. Is this a local or an express? Are we going to be able to stop it all the spa? I'm a demon. I should have just flown on the teeth of the wind. That would have been so much easier to do the teeth of the wind straight. We watched watched them get on a train, an Amtrak train starting in New York to Washington, DC. Pazuzas just get a sit there, fucking doing a crossword for that. I would pay, I would take, we always talking about crazy billionaire remake, my crazy billionaire remake. I just

want to see Pazuzu making small talk with Reagan as they ride in the trains. So, um, I don't know if you remember me. I knew you and you were younger. You were like, this is all you have grown. He didn't have little cheeks. I made you vomit on a guy. Well, I'm sure you've heard this story a ton, but I... There was another guy, but we're not going to talk about that.

There was another guy, but we don't talk about him. He said no to the contract and Richard Berk did so fuck that guy. Am I right? Six letter word for wind demon. I just have to touch on this line because it's so fucking insane. He jumps on the train, right? She jumps after him and we cut to Dr. Thorsten who is like trying to get Dr.

Tuscan, right? He will not stick to my brain because I cared so little. And she just says to the camera, apropos of nothing stupid bitch. Right. She's mad because Reagan stole the synchronizer, right? Yeah. It's Sharon. Who says, yeah, Sharon is the one who says stupid bitch.

She's mad about that stupid bitch. You can be this has not been a stupid bitch movie. It has a very. This is a very out like I would see this in a Pixar film before I was seen in. This has been like a Pazuzu and Kukumo and she's just over here like this fucking asshole. So I think the the stupid bitch line was supposed to set up that Sharon has now become Kukumo and she's just over here like this fucking asshole. So I think the stupid bitch line was supposed to set up that Sharon has now become possessed by the demon.

But how? Because Sharon never mind melding. But, but also it's the politest demon you've ever encountered. So it's like, because there's a little bit through this whole movie, it's been like, I'm sorry, do you need a tea or something? Can I get you anything? Yeah. And instead it's like, it gets in Sharon. It's like, uh, uh, stupid bitch time.

Yeah. Katie, you make a good point. Sharon absolutely did not ever mind meld, but also go fuck yourself. She has Pazuzu in her now. This is the plot. I accept that. With all the mirrors that's in that apartment, the Pazuzu is just bouncing around that apartment.

I'll take a long. No, you know what they say is if you go out when it's cold with a wet robot, you're going to catch a posuzoo. You should try to do the nips. Oh, wait. Beautiful. Really want that bell now. Feed a posuzoo and you'll have to starve a Sharon. Okay. So yeah, they're, they're all headed

to Washington DC now. Reagan actually calls the office to tell Dr. Tuscan like, hey, we're at Penn station. This guy's, he might be possessed. I don't know. He's taken the train to Washington. Sorry. I stole that machine. And now they're all going to race to Washington, DC to have the finale. Except they're going to fly. So they're going to win. Yeah. You'd think you would think they'd win, wouldn't you? Nope. Nope. Right. So Dr. Tuscan and Sharon decide to drive in their car across Manhattan to Penn station and get on a train, but then they changed their mind and they drive to fucking LaGuardia. Yeah. This was unrealistic.

Anybody from nobody who lives in New York would do this. This pulled me right out of the movie. Well, okay, now be there. This was pre 9-11 where you just, you just got into the airport and once you got past the gate, you just got on whatever plane you wanted. You just drive to the plane. Yeah. Exactly.

You took your hunting knife, your two kids, your grand and you just got on whatever plane you wanted. But what this sequence is for is we're supposed to see. I think please correct me if I'm wrong. We're supposed to see Pazuzu throwing obstacles in Sharon and Dr. Thorsten's way. Yes. Yes. And his only obstacle is a car accident. That's all he could think of. He's doing the like lowest level stalling that a demon of the wind could possibly do. At one point, there's just an injured guy who like staggers to the front of Dr. Thirton's car. And he's like, oh, I'm so hurt. And Sharon's like, keep going. Just

draft. Just keep trying to look at my contact. Don't be. I can take. Oh, I looked at him. I look, okay. Hi. Hi. Yeah. No. Sorry. I don't have anything. No, she goes, I'm a doctor. I can help you. And I was like, here's a call. I just don't think he needs that right now. That black bag in the back seat, though. Yeah. There. A synchronizer. I wanted to get over to him. Okay. Quick. Tell me about your relationship with your, oh, your leg is broken. Oh,

I'm going to need to figure your heart real quick. So Dr. Tuscan and Sharon, sorry. Sorry. I know. Is that a real bell? No, I'm showing my boobs. Another nibble. I'll do it. Ican and Sharon. Oh, is that a real bell? Do we get another? I'm showing my boobs just to the neck. I'll do it. I'll do it to my boobs. Give us four bells, four nipples for me, really quick, four.

Perfect. Okay. Okay, so Dr. Tuscan and Sharon finally make it to Washington. They get in a cab. Tuscan says, take us to eight prospect street. And the cabbie is like, I don't know, eight prospect street because I guess he knows the addresses of all the demon attacks in city. All the demon houses. Yeah, obviously.

A cubanical ad of D. And meanwhile, Father Lamont and Reagan get on a bus. He's possessed by Pazuzzi so he yells at the bus driver. Whoa, whoa, whoa, we have to talk about this. The bus driver is eating a big sloppy sandwich and Pazuzu, spirit king of the wind has to go, come on, man. I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

I have ridden a lot of city buses in my life and never would a bus driver listen to a shitty priest African shirt wearing passenger things like let's go when you're eating a good sandwich. Pazuzu getting arrested on the curb. Oh my god, this is fucking bullshit. This is bullshit. I don't, I don't give consent to film this. Oh, Pazuzu on cops.

Bad boy, bad boy. Would you get a hot guy? I'm running. Oh shit. I wish there, huh? Got a buddy. Oh shit. I wish there was a locus right now. I can fly away. This guy's holding it's jet.

He's not even know him. He's a good demon guy. He don't even know him. But Zuzu's wife is on the front lawn in short shorts. Let him talk. Let's assume soon. Now I'm ensuring the locus in a wife feeder getting scared. Locust gets sprayed by a fire extinguisher all over the place.

Yeah. Okay. So they're all on the way to the house. Father Lamont and Reagan get their first. Father Lamont goes inside, check out the death room where the exorcism happened back in the day. And Reagan's a little bit behind him. And she gets like the perfect finale amount of undressed by the bond wire.

On our way. We see exactly the negotiation for how naked Linda was willing to get. They were like, oh, come on. 90. And she was like, fine. 90. I wear a 90 for the final. Right. So then father Lamont opens the door to that room. And there's a giant swarm of demon locusts. They pour out and attack him. And also this is making the cab that Sharon and Dr. Tuscon are in go crazy. Like the cab itself goes haywire and they crash,

but very conveniently they crash right at the final scene at the average into their location. So I think the cab got hit by the locus. Oh, I think the locus are supposed to be what broke the windshield. Oh, I thought the driver punched the windshield. Well, the windshield like it's shattered. It's spider webs. Oh, gotcha, gotcha, gotcha. And then the cabbie who is a fucking beast was like, oh, I know what to do in this situation. I'm not sure if I had out the window. I'm gonna punch a fucking hole in this thing.

That is really quick thinking. This is why you don't go to eight prospect. I always tell myself. But this is also the third time in the movie I screamed. Yeah, holy shit. Right. So they crash right at the house. Reagan finally gets inside and walks upstairs. The locusts are gone at this point. And Fadalaman is just sitting in the corner next to the stairwell, staring at the door to that room. Yeah. And pointing.

Yeah. So again, Pazuzu possesses Fadalamant, gets him there, the door opens up and he's like, we should honestly wait for Sharon and Dr. Thurban. They're like right outside. I feel weird if we just, I don't want to get started without them. I think her name is Tuscan. And they're pretty sure it's. I literally say a different word every time because I refuse to remember it. Dr. Tarrant Ferguson. Yeah. So meanwhile, at the crash, Sharon gets out of the wrecked car.

And for a second, I guess she's possessed too. So she's going to leave Dr. Tuscan trapped inside the car, which is starting to burn maybe. And the reason Dr. Tuscan is trapped is because the metal, rot iron fence got inside of the crashed car and made a cage like Magneto did it. And yup, so she stuck in there. That's a next one reference as well. Thank you. Yeah. And I know what you're thinking to yourself, podcast, listen, you're like, oh, is the tension now that will the doctor escape the current time?

Nope, she just gets out. Yeah, she gets out. But and this is the stupidest thing possible. Sharon, who is possessed by Pazuzu. So just really try to follow Pazuzu's game blend here. Sharon, who's possessed by Pazuzu is standing in a puddle of gasoline. And she's like, oh, I'm going to light myself on fire. So Sharon Pazuzu self emulates outside the house to give her herself Pazuzu time inside

to this white Richard bird. Yeah, I saw it makes sense. The tracks. Okay. Pazuzu just to have Sharon not attack himself during his thing. Well, he could just go in and out of people. He's producing. Yeah. Or have Sharon help with the attack or whatever. You think it seems like they're use of a style. But the movie needed to give us another instance where someone watched someone burned a divin. I didn't call that. She stands there.

I'm not kidding. She stands there for the rest of the movie watching Sharon on fire being like, Oh, Sharon. Sharon Jones. They were right. It does smell like pork. So we're cutting back and forth between this fire scene outside at the crash and Reagan and father Le Mans inside. So Reagan opens the door to the old room and sees the demon possessed ghost of herself from the past. And then father Le Mans attacks her. Right. Attacks Reagan in real reality, Reagan. Well, no, first he starts smooching baby possessed Reagan, which is very upsetting because I think she's supposed to be seven in that first movie. She's a child.

Yeah, she's still a child, but she's definitely supposed to be a child in that first movie. Yeah. But he and zombie Reagan are smooching now. And then zombie Reagan re-pazuzu tells him to kill real Reagan. So we watch Richard Burton beat the shit out of Reagan for a couple of scenes. If you thought that this movie doesn't end with a fist fight between a steam shake spirit Richard Burton and a teenage girl. You are incorrect. You're incorrect. Yep. That is what happens for a while right now. The whole house is also imploding as this is happening. Is the idea that like the depths of hell have opened up right below the house and like locusts are pouring out. I thought it was because the car hit it, but now that you say that. Or the locusts or I thought the locusts were doing structural

damage somehow. There's a scene where like a crack open is up and there's just a locust like, oh shit. I did it. You guys said I couldn't make through concrete, but this G-Rock's pretty cheap actually. Right. This is the part of the movie that I refer to as the Universal Studios Pazuzu Experience. Yeah. Oh, that'll be great. The tour guide at the front is, oh, no, here comes bazoozo everybody.

Hold on. Camera shaking. Right. So all this is happening. And good Reagan reminds father Lamont about the good, locust concept that they learned from James Earl Jones. Right. But then bad Reagan is like, no, that, that's, that's, you're going to believe

the leopard spitting guy. That's not real. That's not real. We keep fighting. So they fight for another like 20 minutes of Richard Burton punching. Thank you. This, this woman in the face, this is what I cannot emphasize to you enough is that there is so much footage of a claimed actor Richard Burton elbow dropping what is a very clearly a real teenage girl. Just oh, yes. The old Shakespearean stunner. If if Richard Burton power bummed Reagan into the floor, I'll W. W. E. It could not be more silly. Just like Katie did to me during the rumble. Yeah. Absolutely. Yeah. But yeah, he fist fights a teenager and eventually rips out her heart. Yeah. Who's hard is that? It's Pizzuzu's heart. Pizzuzu. The demon's heart. But yeah, demon

heart. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Where the body that he is ripping the heart out of comes from? Big question. Yeah. Well, it's the bad he is ripping the heart out of comes from big question. Yeah. Well, it's the big answer. Pazuzu Reagan. That was on the bed looking sexy. Is the main weakness of a locus demon, a heart pole? Is that what we're to believe a pair of James Earl Jones appears as a ghost and does a full on Obi-Wan rip out her heart thing? Yeah. Okay. Well, isn't it also like French really confuses it? Yep. Yeah. And this is my favorite part of the ending here of this final sequence, right? So the locust are scaring everything earlier in the movie when we were watching the healer

boy, Kukumanga, right? He had this swingy thing, which is something that they actually use. By the way, I thought that was bullshit, but I looked it up. They actually do it. It'll stop locusts. You like swing this whistle thing and it makes a noise that fucks with the locust. Really cool scientific thing. Yeah.

So that happened earlier in the movie Reagan, of course, doesn't have a swingy thing. No, no, we just watch her do the right and cowboy gesture. She's doing the Apache. She's saying. Okay. I was trying to think of a way to say it that isn't the Apache dance, but it's the Apache dance. She's doing the Apache. Imagine a woman with a Toronto jump on it, a totally straight face doing Tonto jump on it for like four minutes. Wow, Richard Burton. Like does WWE style wrestling

moves to a teenage girl. That is the climax of this film. And I'm going to go ahead and say it, my life. This film was the only thing to climax at this point. I was the boy who came. My Harry Potter fanfiction. Also at this point, we see that all of the lights are on in the surrounding houses and nobody has even come out to see what's happened. Like a car hit a building and then fell down in a swarm of locusts. I feel like you're at least going to get off the couch and poke your head out. Yeah, this is a burby, am I right?

Yeah, commentary on the. Honey, are they doing a locust demon thing at eight prospect again? Yeah, yeah, don't go out. I just hope he whooped that kid's ass. Are they all white? Yes. Let it. So if somebody doing tanto jump on it,. Are they all white? Yes. Let it. Let it. So somebody doing tanto jump on it. It'll be fine. It's fine. Yeah. Also, this is when

father Lamont, I guess he's cured now. And he walks over and he's like, Oh, yeah, Sharon is like dying right there. Don't be too hard on yourself, though. Dr. Tuscan, you're just a dumb scientist. And he does like a quick prayer for them. But then he's like, yep, we've been in Kushival, we won. So there we go. So Dr. Tuscan, this is the end of the movie. I'm talking the last 10 seconds of the movie. Dr. Tuscan turns to Richard Burton and goes,

your Reagan's mom now. And he's like, yep, yes I am. We might as well watch Father LeMont and Reagan riding a bus together and they're smiles slowly fading. They just leave on a tandem bicycle. Yeah. So weird.

Doesn't Reagan have a mom still in the movie? Yeah. It's just a way on set. Uh-huh. Yes. 100%. Yeah. You're not giving a teenager away.

But if you're a psychiatrist, you could just give a teenager to whoever you want. You can just wave your fingers. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Okay, that's your power of a turning second. But then in the last shot of the movie, the police lights are sort of like acting as the synchronizer. Yeah.

Think about it. I am. Because Dr. Tuck is on face. She gets this like a mean look on her face. Is she a bazoo zoo now? Because she's a healer? Oh, I didn't think about that. Are they really angling to make another fucking

movie? Is this like an Azazel situation like in Fallen? Ooh, maybe. Oh, also about possibly an Assyrian demon I forget. But yeah, maybe interesting. Well, that's the end of the fucking movie. They're just like, yup, zoop. We're done. And you're the dad of this child now done. You're the mom now, dog. Yeah. Okay. So before

I wrap it up, I just want to ask the panel, if you had that mind melding thing, what would you do with it? Oh, dibbs on Heats mom. What? I don't know why I asked these questions. Does anybody have a not my mom answer to what you would do with the mind melding? No, my answer was also your mom. God damn it. Oh, that's going to do it for the exorcist to the herding. But that's not going to do it for the episode just yet,

because we found another terrible movie for next week. So Eli, what's on deck? Well, we'll be watching Dilly loves Kitty live in Seattle, Washington. It's sold out. You can't come. All right. Fuck you. With that to look forward to we're gonna bring episode 395 to a merciful close. Big thanks to Katie and Alan for joining us. So much fun. So where can everybody go to hear more for you? Where's a where of ambulance? Where can they connect with you on the internet? We're on all of the podcast places. So wherever you listen to podcasts, you can find us. You can go to

werewolfamulants.libson.com to find us. Excellent. We have a Patreon. Yes, where we do action movies. What? Yeah. Yeah. Oh my God, I'm becoming a patron instantly. I'm going to whatever's happening during the last 10 seconds of this podcast, he lies

not paying attention because I'm signing up. We just did an episode on crank. So if you're intro, I love that movie. So good. I'm so mad. So come on. Yes. Amazing movie. You all concluded that that was just an amazing movie. He's magical. Power's up. You had to kind of just do a weird episode because that's a really great movie. Yeah. Uh-huh. Yeah. That's the one. That's a ticket. You got it. All right. Yeah. We're on all the, well, we're on Twitter and Instagram. We've

abandoned Facebook. So if you want to write anything bad about well, we're on Twitter and Instagram. We've abandoned Facebook. So if you want to write anything bad about us, just go there and do it. That's fair. Oh, yeah, that's it. We changed our name to Whirlfambiel and complaints department. So, love there. Yeah, there you go. Yeah, that's it.

All right. And of course, a big thanks to all our Patreon donors for the generosity. If you'd like to help support the show, you can make a per episode donation at patreon.com slash god awful. And that'll get your early access to an ad free version of every episode. And if you enjoyed this show, you should check out our sibling shows,

the Skating Atheist, Citation Needed, Skeptocrat, and D&D Minus available in all the podcast places. If you have questions, comments, or cinematic suggestions, you can email Godawtholmoviesademo.com. Our theme song was written and performed by Ryan Slotnik, with Eagle Drafts on Mars. While other music was written and performed by our audio engineer Morgan Clark and was used with permission.

Thanks again for giving us a chunk of your life this week. For Katie, Alan, and Eli, I'm Heath, promise to work hard, turn another chunk next week. Until then, we'll leave you with the Animal House Close. Richard Burton Red Scrippsy agreed to much more carefully for Ben O'Hour. Kukumo got in trouble with Oshia for the holographic lobby with the bed of magic nails at his office. Father LeMont began wearing a Dishikki and Kuffy everywhere.

And Scott the shoot kicked out of him. Ha-ha-ha-ha! Ha-ha-ha-ha! And Linda Blair got to tap her way into many, many other films. Hey, if you don't feel safe right now, we will let you do the bike count. I just blinked a couple times, but it's like, yeah, you did that hand thing. Did you been abducted? No, put the spot on your palm. Why did Katie order an angel? That's weird. Nobody ever orders a B 52. I mean, he does do shots during our podcast,

but that's because he's a functional alcoholic. So he's functional. He's functional. He's functional. He's functional. It was nice. Okay. Um, what is the animal house clothes versus the breakfast club clothes?

It is. Oh, it's the animal house clothes because that's an actual correct reference to the thing in the movie. Breakfast club clothes is like what people misremember about how the animal house goes down in the animal house. And it was hard movie. Oh. The preceding podcast was a production of

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