God Awful Movies - 548: Restoring Grace

Episode Date: March 17, 2026

This week, Cara Santa Maria joins us for an atheist review of Restoring Grace. It's Cara's second foray into the Wright family filmography and a terrifying new window into that family's kinks.---To see us live in San Francisco, click here: https://www.eventbrite.com/e/god-awful-movies-live-in-san-francisco-california-tickets-1976632374642Check out more from Cara on the Talk Nerdy podcastIf you’d like to make a per episode donation and get monthly bonus episodes, please check us out on Patreon: http://patreon.com/godawfulCheck out our other shows, The Scathing Atheist, The Skepticrat, Citation Needed, and D&D Minus.Our theme music is written and performed by Ryan Slotnick of Evil Giraffes on Mars. If you’d like to hear more, check out their Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/EvilGiraffesOnMars/Report instances of harassment or abuse connected to this show to the Creator Accountability Network here: https://creatoraccountabilitynetwork.org/

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please contact Connix Ontario at 1866-531-2600 to speak to an advisor free of charge. BetMGM operates pursuant to an operating agreement with Eye Gaming Ontario. So then we can't... Where do squirrels come from? Hey, Noah, can you use that as the front of the episode clip? Because then we don't have to worry about anyone listening. To the episode, they'll just say, oh, there it was. They all cracked at the same time.

Oh, Eli, I cracked long ago. I'm crying. So, okay. God awful movie. Movie. Welcome back to the Gamecast, where each week we sample another selection from Christian Cinema because friendships are easier to maintain when there's a financial incentive. I'm your host.

No illusions and sitting 700 miles to my immediate left is my good friend Heath and right Heath. Welcome back. We got the right family back. We did. We did. It's like a warm blanket. So much about them is that we'll never run out.

She came out with eight movies last year. Hell yeah. She did clean. They're making AI shit now. Yeah. It's like an unlimited supply. And of course, sitting 900 miles to my northeast is my bad friend, Eli Bosnick. Eli, how are you this fine afternoon, sir?

Right family films. Yes, and of course, we're also excited to welcome back at guest massacist who said she never wanted to miss another Wright family film. Kara, Santa Maria. Kara, welcome back. I want my $2.99 back for this. No, yeah, absolutely, yeah.

And the hour of my life. I know it was only an hour, but like I feel like that's, what, 12 hours with interest. Yeah, no, it's dog. You're definitely working in dog gears when you're watching a right family film. No, it's the hours you feel, not the hours you live. Yeah. I actually got to watch Kara,

watch this movie throughout the day because I was like checking in and doing stuff on my notes. And so I would just see where Kara is and how how her psyche had dissolved. Eli, that makes it sound like you have cameras in my house. Yeah, it does. I do. I do. That's what I was saying. We're not supposed to tell her about the cameras.

I've asked an answer. So tell us, Heath, we've hinted around about it quite a bit. But I guess, you know, it could be one of like 61 different things here. So what will we be breaking down today? We watched Restoring Grace. It's a right family fight. It's the story of David Owen Wright flying into a rage when Fritos were missing from his prepper pantry. And then finding peace with the help of, I think, a biblical prophet that he hallucinated.

Sure. Also, they made a movie that vaguely relates to some of that. They sure did. And Eli, how bad was that movie? Well, if you love it. right family films, and I know you do, but you wish they arbitrated more of Ashley and David's couple fights on air, you will love this movie. Look, there have been things that we have learned about the rights based on watching as many of their films as we have. And I think it's

safe to say, aside from the family, we have watched more of the rights films than any other group of people on Earth. So we've learned all sorts of things about them, like they have a third daughter and the names of the various animals on their farm. And their kinks, yeah. Right. Yeah, the kinks, very obviously. That's sort of what we learned first and continue to learn every single day. But this week, we learned, like, just a moment of tension.

Like, this is very clearly a fight they had. Yep. And then they made up. And she was like, you know, great artists use it. That's what they say. Also, I need to get a seventh movie out this year. Their movies are back and front. forth, just like dueling grievances.

Like within the movie and movie by movie, it's like one of them wrote a little section and it's a grievance and a fight. And then the other side of it, it's the best. I feel like when their kids finally go to therapy and they will, they should like drop off a box set of right family. Oh, for sure. For sure. All right.

So is there anything you guys want to nominate this one for being the best, to be in the worst hat? Okay. Yeah. We already started talking about it. I'm going to say best worst family fight. specifically about IMDB ratings. Oh, really?

So this movie got a 3.5 out of 10. Robbed. And I checked. In the last five years, they've made 25 movies. And the only ones that got above a 5 out of 10 are about horses and donkeys and not God versus Bigfoot and David's Yetty kink or anything like that. And he is furious that his never get above a 5. All right, so I'm going to go with best, and I don't want to spoil anything. So I'm just going to tease you with this one right now, and we'll get to it when we get to it in the movie.

But best worst manna from heaven. Yeah, that's kinky. Oh, yeah. And I'm going to go with best worst beard. Sure. So among the other things that we've watched over the years is David's four inch across beard growing straight down towards hell from whence it came. At this point, he should be going by. David Wright gruff?

It's insane. Yeah. God, Eli, like, I immediately flew to the notes to write best worst beard. And I thought you stole mine. But then I realize you're talking about David Owen Wright, which is Bobby the sheriff, as we'll learn. Bobby Lee. Bobby Lee. But clearly, the best worst beard in this film is that of Elijah.

Yes. Who is, he is inexplicably Indian. And he looks like Santa fresh from the. the dog groomer. Yeah, he sure does. That is 100% accurate. I was watching this movie yesterday. I was like halfway through and I'm talking to Ann and I'm describing the nonsense.

And I was like, yeah, I think it's about Indian Santa. And Anne was like, what? And I was like, yep, that's a correct description of a main character. All right. Well, any break between Wright Family Films is too long. So we're going to keep this one brief. When we come back, we'll dive into all the. long panning shots of snowy woods that are restoring grace.

It's got to be in here somewhere. We should dump the whole thing out. It'll be easier to look. Yeah. Eli, Heath, why are you going through my purse? Oh, hey, Kara. We're trying to be more fiscally responsible this year. Yeah, so where's all your famous person money?

Give me that. What are you talking about? I don't have famous person money. Oh, no. Did you get Nick Caged? Did you have to sell your... T-Rex go? Oh, you poor thing. Why didn't you tell us? No, guys, look, if you want to make better financial decisions this year, you should try Rocket

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RocketMoney.com slash awful movies. Thanks, Kara. Guys, I ran all the cars. None of them have a million dollar credit line. Yeah, because I don't have a million dollars. She got engaged. Oh, Kara, I'm so sorry to hear that. All right, kids, gather around.

Mama has another idea for a movie. Hooray! Do we get fried chicken this time? No. That was my favorite one. We know it was, kids. So what's this one about deer? Well, it's about a rough, tough sheriff of a small town.

I'll play that character. Yeah, Dad, we know. I'm just saying dibs. Yeah, anyway, he spends too much time smoking cigars and drinking and doesn't appreciate his wife. It's one of these again? You know what? Well, maybe if the wife in the movie appreciated him a little more. Well, and he's bad at his job, and he needs to read his Bible more.

Well, I think she needs to read her Bible more. I'm going to go hang out with the donkeys. And he has a stupid beard and stupid face, and then he finds Jesus and stops doing that stuff if he ever wants to have sex again. Oh, well, isn't that great for her? And then everyone has fat chicken. Damn it, Cadence. I said no. Beans!

Oh, can we have beans? No. And we're back for the breakdown, and we're going to open up on. on that giddy feeling I get when I see the right family media logo. Holy shit, have they gotten their $5 out of that logo, right? They sure have. So, yeah, so we get the right family. And then we get like one second of music.

Right? Like they believed that they were allowed to use like 1.8 seconds before they had to pay the rights or something like that. They got their nickel out of that music too, yeah. I think the MOV file that they bought their. logo with comes with music at the end and she didn't quite cut the sound at the end of premiere. It's almost certainly accurate. One of the things that I've learned to appreciate about write family films this year is as I'm teaching students premiere, I'm seeing Ashley Wright's mistakes in premiere. Oh, look, the cursors in the movie. Credit and everything. I wrote my notes

at this point. I'm like, can we really be upset with AI making art when we let these people do it. Yes. Especially when those people are using AI to do it. Yeah, right. Yeah, exactly. So I've been on this show long enough at this point that this is my second Wright family film. Hell yeah. Bananas. How many of you guys done total?

So I was counting it up beforehand. I think this is our seventh. Oh, shit. I think it's either six or seven. Yeah. My favorite is that the film that I did was episode 408 of Gam and it was called In Jesus Name. Just Jesus.

Not Jesus S's. No. Because it already ends with an S, Kara. Couldn't fit the title in the font they wanted using premiere on one line. Jesus Siss says. You can't do an autostrophy if there's not another S after it. I couldn't remember what that was. What's atosterone?

I was going to remember which one it was called. I could look for a catastrophe and that ain't in it. So it's okay. So we open up. That's what we're calling the next movie. So Ashley, the kink that we're going to basically be trying to write off on our taxes this week is Ashley's cop kink, right? Yeah.

Oh, I thought you were going to say cigar. No. Maybe that too. But so we see David Owen Wright as the sheriff. And he's as always. Well, as quite often, yeah. So he's swilling whiskey and smoking cigars. And she's not dead in this movie, which is always nice.

I always feel like she's in a better place. when she's making a movie where she hasn't killed herself. So, honestly, when you see her at first, you're not sure, though. But, yes, she is alive. I think she's in a better place when she has killed her. She's a tough a lot. Rough. She's in the other room making a lot of AI movies about unicorns.

Yeah, right, right. So, but yeah, so Ashley. 15 seconds at a 10. So Ashley tells him that she wants him to stop smoking cigars in the house, and they get into a big fight, right? she tells him he should be reading his Bible more and he tells her the Bible is a bunch of mumbo jumbo. What's amazing is that like after all this time

they still don't know what our problem is with the Bible, right? They seem to think that we think it's like too hard to read or too obfuscated like the fucking snicker snack, the claxy glook as opposed to just like full of immorality and explicitly condone slavery. You know what I'm saying? You think they're that. sophisticated in their thinking, Eli. Well, no, I think, you know, they're not talking to us.

They're talking to the Christian that would tell you they're Christian but doesn't read their Bible, right? Because we're the ones who watch their movie. Well, that's true. Exactly. Right. They should be aiming them at us specifically. They should, like, turn to the camera at this point and say, okay, Eli, the point we was trying to make here was. Hey, did we get an EP credit because we fucking shit.

Yeah. They're not making these movies for anyone but themselves. Oh, that's where you're wrong, character. That's where you're wrong. No, I feel like the primary reason is if they make a movie, they can write off that Connect 4. They bought it the Goodwill on their taxes. Yes.

And they can pretend they're not having an aggressive couples fight in real life. And they can pretend that there's a reason why all those Getty costumes are in the closet that has nothing to do with their sex life. Yeah. It's important too. Yeah. And by the way, all those sheriff costumes. Yeah, that too, right.

This man changed five times. times over a two-day period in this film. Yeah, he's got a wide palette of sheriff there available to him at any moment. Like every shade of tan, you know. So this is also where we establish that she works at a bar, so her Christianity doesn't really count if you think about it. Yeah, she's less honorable. Yes, that's how he put it.

Fuck you. Bartender's more honorable than like every job. Get the fuck out of it. I was curious. Graver than the troops. But we do get to watch them. We are. Chew out the word honorable each.

It's pretty fun. She gets it on her first try. You can tell he's on like take 17 because he says it too angry. Honorable. Well, if I wasn't supposed to say the H, why would there be an H? Why would there be one? Silent H's treason. China wants the H to be silent.

That's why their age is. Why? Irration. Kind of. Kind of. Ah, you beat me doing it. So, but this is, but at the end of this fight, he tells her he would choose a good cigar over her, damn it. Yeah.

Okay. I have a tragic little detail. I bet you this is something he said in a real fight. I think you're right. Yes. To make him say the apology. Oh, God. It's 100%.

100%. What's happening here? But then, and we'll get to this at the end. But then when she writes the apology, like he negotiates it down. Right? Oh, it's so, she is so, like, misogynistic against herself.

Yes. It's rough. No, we'll talk about the apology when it happens. Right, right. It's a tragedy of feminine. Well, it happens. Yeah. So, okay.

I feel like he started changing stuff and she was like, no improvising cut. You got to say the thing that I wrote for you to say. I am Paul Thomas Anderson. Right. Change a fucking word. So, okay. So now he's at work.

Pig, fuck. And he's calling the, he's calling the local paper about taking out an ad for his re-election campaign. Right? And I'm like, oh, yeah, no, taking out an advertisement in a newspaper, keep it topical, man. He also calls himself sheriff. He's like, hey, it's sheriff. Yeah.

Like, that's his name. Right, right. It's me, sheriff. Yeah, but the guy Tim at the, or sorry, Tom, there's a Tom and a Tim in this stupid fucking movie. So the guy, Tom, who runs the local paper, tells him that there's actually no room for ads left in the local paper? I'm like, when is this set?

If I took out a local ad, a fucking ad in my local paper, it would come with free oral sex for a year. Are you kidding me? Yeah. I got no space left. Kanye's apologizing to the Jewish people over again. He took out all the asses. He's going to doing it again.

He got him very busy. What is happening? But what it turns out that his opponent in the race, Tim Mercer, has bought up all the ad space in the entire town. Hey, hon, I'm just looking over your script. Do we want the two people who people will talk about to have different names than the ones they, no, Tom and Tim? Okay, cool. That'll be great. But yeah. So, and then he accuses Tom, the newspaper guy, of taking a bribe. And I'm like, no, man, he's allowed to just like take money for ads. That's, yeah, that's just, yeah, that's

commerce. There is a swirling political conspiracy in this time he's out about being a sheriff. And I'm pretty sure. David Owen Wright in whatever the fuck Maine where they actually live tried to be sheriff and something happened and he's Oh interesting he's like I already have the outfit They live in Maine? Yeah no

Wow You were picturing the south I was picturing the middle Just the middle part Yeah definitely in the middle And also to be clear as Eli kind of semi clarified here Tom is not a character

He does not exist He is just somebody who the sheriff talks to on the phone throughout the film. So here's the thing here that you might not be aware of because you haven't watched the half dozen right family films that we have. That there's only four of them, five of them. And if there's ever a need for another character, it's always one of them in a mask. This is this movie. Except this time. Exactly.

This movie actually has another actor, which kind of freaked me out. Yeah, it's Gary Clark. Yeah. But I, here's my thoughts. Do you think Gary Clark is their third? Ooh, I like it. Now I do. I tried to look up who is Gary Clark to, what's his name again?

David Owen Wright. David Owen Wright. And all I found were literally when you Google who is Gary Clark to David Owen Wright, the whole first page of Google hits are like warrants for arrest and like obituaries. Yeah, Gary Clark's a pretty common one. I think, yeah, probably David Wright is as well. Dang it. I think he was dating one of the daughters.

Oh, God. Gross. Wolf. They're 15. So yeah. Ew, stop. Okay. So, but then he's real mad.

And then we think this movie's about to turn really dark, right? Because he starts loading bullets into a clip. And he goes, I'll show you, Tim Mercer. That's the guy who's running against him. And we're like, ooh, is he going to murder Tim Mercer? Yeah, he's loading a gun while he's looking at the ad for Tim Mercer. for sheriff that he printed out, Johnny.

He's just staring at it angrily and loading a gun. Can we talk, though, about just real quick, a couple of details of this office. Oh, yes, yes. Which, to be clear, is just a room in their house. Absolutely. Oh, no, to be clear,

every interior shot is just a room. And we know this because they all have the same wood trim. They do. Every interior shot. Another good clue is there's a huge, silly, muddy footprint on top of his desk. What? He's supposed to have a sheriff.

Amazing. I don't know what he did. But he's stepping all over the top of that desk at some point. He had to change the lap bowl. I was getting a good angle. An overhead shot. My favorite details because they have to make it look like a cop's office, not just an office in particular.

So they have a giant poster of a fingerprint print. Yes, that was the other thing I was going to mention. There's a fingerprinting like how to read the war. of a fingerprint. Like the names of each one of them. And by the way, if you're like looking at like each individual, like that's going to be like dousing or something. Right.

That's going to be like pseudoscience shit, you know? Yeah. He does fingerprinting so much that he needs like a giant answer key on the wall. Yeah. Like, you know, how to deal with choking and how to read a finger. Guys, this guy is good at his job and he will remind us of that many times throughout this. Yes, no, right, right. And then he's just written a bunch of cop words on the fucking.

Whiteboard. It's amazing. The whiteboard is the best. At one point, all you can see is Tickets 83. Because, you know, that's high score. Yeah, right. And he's the only cop we ever see. So it's the lonely busy. You've got to keep up. Yeah, right, right.

So, yeah, but it turns out he's not going to go kill Tim Mercer. He's going to go shoot at the post. I wrote poster in my notes to say 8 by 11. piece of paper that they've printed the piece of printer paper exactly but then we get our title right restoring grace

okay I saw that and I was like okay her name's gonna be grace cool but it's not that however their last name is grace yes it is that he's Bobby Lee Grace I'm watching restoring Bobby Lee

Grace the movie yeah yeah so then we watch him like dramatically sit in a cop car and drink alcohol? Well, specifically, he's drinking Scoresby Scotch. And I'd never heard of this. I know a lot of scotches. I'd never seen this one, never heard of it.

I bet that means it's great, huh? Yeah, well, you tell me, I looked it up. And the answer I got from, I think, Google or Google, you know, AI suggestion was aged three years, best used as a mixer for cola. Yeah. Best used, huh? Or for an engine cleaner, yes. God.

We make the scotch that you want to mix with other stuff. Oh, wow, when it's just like, wow, this will be offensive to the palate of scotch drinkers, woof. See, now for a second I was living in a fantasy world where Heath Lake went to the liquor store and discovered his new favorite scotch and then for the rest of his life had to be like, oh, where did I hear about this? Scotch magazine. Are you familiar with the donkey rescue community?

All right, so we watch him drink alcohol for a minute and then we check in on two of his daughters. They're not going to play his daughters, just two girls in this movie. This is Elena and Becky. And Becky is the bad girl, right? She's got a leather jacket. That's how you know.

Yeah, and lipstick. Oh, and mascara. Eyeliner. This is Scout, right. I have her a scout in my own. Because immediately I was like, it's Scout. It's like family. Right, it's like when Kramer came onto the thing

and everybody would scream in the audience for Seinfeld or whatever. It was like that, yeah. She feels like my cousin in a cult that I worry about each time I get. Like, I don't do anything, but every time I'm reminded, I'm like, oh. Yeah. So, but Elena, who is the good girl, she says, hey, I've got a new board game that mom was able to write off of her taxes. If I show it to you right now, do you want to play?

And it's, it's Connect 4, which technically isn't a board game and it's also solved. So who gives us shit? Solved games, stupid. Not to the rights. It's not. I can't emphasize enough that there's no set of language or amount of time. You can contribute to convince the rights that Connect 4. They're 100% kinging each other and jumping each other.

and jumping each other. Yeah. We could, and I'm not kidding, win their farm. With an appropriate, yeah, with an appropriate sense. Dojo storm them with Connect 4? We could be like,

we get to go first, and we'll win a hundred times in a row. And they'd be like, you're wrong, do you, boy. Jesus Christ. All right, but Becky, though, she's too cool for this Connect 4 bullshit. She says,

that looks kind of babyish, I think we should succumb to man's sinful nature and rob a store. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Right. It turns out that down at Norman's market, they leave the back door unlocked on trash day. And they're not trying to, like, rob the till. No. They don't want money.

They explicitly say they're going to get snacks. Yeah. They say snacks a lot. And I'm starting to notice that there's a theme in God-awful movies. Noah, do you remember when? we watch the buttercream gang, and they said snacks so much that you asked if it was written by a cat. Well, but that's the thing, though. It's actually kind of an interesting insight to the Christian worldview because they can't have these kids want to do anything that's really simple.

You know, they can't be out there stealing cigarettes or doing drugs or drinking alcohol, right? So all that's left to them is snacks. It's such a sad, sad world they have it. And snacks is also how they're doing. I am certain how they bribe their children to do the movies because every single movie, no matter how themed, is the kids at one point eat a food that I bet they don't usually get. Yeah, right.

It gets crazy. It was like jumbo jet stars for everybody. Like, it gets crazy at different moments. And the girl in this scene actually says to the other girl, we need to have cool adventures to fit in with the popular kids. That's a line. Oh, she says out loud. And be higher above the rest.

You know, like the kids say? So I had to write that exchange down. This is the verisimilitude of Ashley Wright's dialogue, guys. So Becky says, she's saying, oh, you know, we'll make us more popular. She says, and I quote, it'll put us higher above the rest. To which Elena says, I do want to be more popular. I do enjoy God's love. I don't know, six, seven snacks.

Let's do it. And then we cut to one and a half seconds of fucking Santa after he killed the Balrog standing in the woods. That was the weirdest cut. Like, do you think they accidentally left that piece of film in? Like, it was very strange. No, what happens is you see, your B-roll is you take a track of video of Santa standing in the woods and you put it at the bottom of your movie.

And then any time you cut, any inch or space you left there in the digital file, that's B roll. That's how that works. Yeah, exactly. Because it's the B. It says B track B. Yeah. So, yeah. So after that bizarre, like one second clip, we cut to the girls breaking into the store,

except they couldn't find a store to film in, right? No, this is 100% the rights preparer pantry that we're looking at. Yeah. It's at the end of the hall, same wood trim. Yeah. Really weird doors, like secret folding doors. Yes. Yeah.

No, David Owen Wright very clearly has snacks in a closet that are just for him. And he has like a security system with multiple doors. Somebody fucked with it. He made this movie to adjudicate that argument partially. Yeah. Do you know what my favorite part is? There's a box labeled snack. Yep.

They steal Fritos out of the box. Oh, he's got a Frito drawer, y'all. There's just, yeah. It's amazing. And so because of that being, true, them being in the prepper pantry that they have in their house. What we're watching instead of like, oh, we're

going to rob the convenience store, they're going to steal a bunch of like stewed tomatoes and Biskwick. Like, you know, like the Rizzful cool kids do. Like those rebels, always stealing huge boxes of Biskwick

Pee. Yes, and freeze. Dried legumes or whatever he is. They got backer buckets here at the 7-Eleven. Fuck. But now later it's going to be all bags of chips, right? Because that's what they were bribing the kids with. Yeah.

So they actually just steal, I think, just, you know, three, four bags of Freeto's and they leave. And I'm pretty sure one detail of this argument is they were stealing from one of those boxes of like, you know, a variety pack of different chips where you got Freeto's and you got Lays, you know, whatever. And they took only Fritos. They took all the Fritos. And David clearly likes the Fritos best and has a very serious rule that you go. one at a time, so there's an even number of any specific one left in the variety pack. I feel like you're projecting me. Can I give you that note?

I don't want to be. I'm not having this fight again. So there's one thing, too, that I fucking love about this theft scene because they're whispering to each other. They're like, oh, let's get the Fritos. Oh, let's get the snacks. And then they open these paper bags really fucking loudly and start loading them up. I cracked up. Hey, be quiet.

Crumple, crumple, crumple. Like me trying to eat while we buy. Peter Griffin eating the chip inside the wall with Anne Frank. That was a good one, heath. Classic grape. But then they hear somebody, so they run. And now they're in the woods. And we see that someone's following them with a gun.

Guarantee you, that's a real gun, right? There's no way these people have a proper gun. Oh, 100%. All the guns in all the right family films are real and pointed at a face 100% of the time. Okay, and based on what we've seen, I was just like, okay, this guy has a gun. Is Santa Claus stalking two girls through the woods in this movie? What do they do right now?

Well, that's what they're trying to make us think, right? Yeah, so we see a faceless killer giving chase. Now, my thought at this point, of course, is it's a faceless killer because it's David Owen Wright and they're trying to make it seem like there's more actors in it. But no, as it turns out, this is a different actor. And there is a reason why they're obscuring his face beyond the fact that they don't have enough actors.

actors. Do you think Gary is new in town, right? And the rights came over pretty early and brought him a casserole. And they were like, yeah, we make these movies and no one in town had warned him. I think he's their third. I think he's their third. And they got done fucking. And he was like, I want to be in one of your movies. Right. Exactly. Exactly. I want to be made fun of the by the god awful movies, guys. What do you think they'll say about my physical appearance? That you're 80? So, but he knocks Elena unconscious and Becky runs. He chases her down and he catches her, right? And he drags her back.

But so now we cut to David. He's investigating the robbery of the Fritos at the store. And this is where we meet Jaina, daughter number three. Fuck yeah. Kara, just so you're established in the lore, we didn't know this daughter existed until like two movies. Well, maybe they, she finally, you know, got dragged back home. Right.

Yeah. Oh, no. Pay off through death. In this economy? You do your parents' softcore pornographic Yeti films. But she says she's the person who runs the store, which is amazing because she's 15 years old, right? But she's like, no, I run the store here in town. And so David A.R. White, that's probably why he goes by Owen, right, so that I'll fuck.

I'll screw that up. But he's, he's like interrogating her about what happened and whatnot. She's giving him the play-by-play. Yeah. And we're seeing the pantry again. And it's very clear that David Owen Wright lives on Hormel Chili, Ritz Crackers, stewed tomatoes and pancakes. That's it.

Yep. And also so much V8 in cans to go with, you know, washing down the chili cracker pancakes. Sure. Clearly. It's so weird. I love this fucking line. He says to the, he says to Jane at one point, he goes, has anyone come in?

Did anybody pass by last night? Anything? And I'm like, that's too broad, man. You got to narrow it down a little bit. It's a store. Say, if any. Everything happens now. Three, two, one go.

It's weird that she's always plays someone not related to them, right? Oh, wow. Yeah. Huh. It's, she is always the least character character. I think she's Gary's probably.

You think that's who's Gary's Dayton? No, Gary's child, probably. Oh, yeah. No, I think they do have three daughters. They do. They do. No, that's the one. Yeah, yeah.

Caden's scout, who we already met, and now, Jaina, yeah. Wait, then who do you think is Gary's daughter? I'm confused. Jaina. No, Jaina is. If he's the third. Yes.

There you know. I got there. I got there. I got there. It was Gary's birthday and he didn't pull out. Yeah, exactly. I thought they were a newly established thruple.

And that's, I just kidding. She looks the most like a South Asian Santa Claus of the three daughters. Okay. That is fair. You know, he says that every time when you do a right family film,

but I say this time we leave it. Okay. There's also a weird moment here where he goes, David goes, well, I'm glad you weren't here when they broke in or they could have hurt you. And she picks up a big can and she's like, I would have whipped their ass with this can. I'm like, that's a terrible message. I have cans and I'm ready for battle.

Yeah, that's your daughter. She yells snack food. So he's like, what do they take? She's like, candy, soda, chips. Snack food. Fuck. Yeah. It's gone.

Yeah. She's on dad's side in this family fight that's getting a junior. Clearly, yeah. All the Fritos and none of the Cheetos. It fucks it all out. Yeah. The whole ratio's off. So, yes.

But then we, okay, so then we have this very brief scene, which I would normally leave out of the movie, but there's just no fucking scene in a right family film that I'm going to leave out where they're dragging Becky, the scout through the woods, right? And she's trying not to have a wee look on her face, but she's failing. Oh, see, I think so, no, let's get controversial here

because I think she's uncomfortable. Oh, yeah, yes. Right, when her shirt has hiked up slightly and she's being dragged through snowy ground. And so I think it's being, like, God damn it, Becky. You just hold up for like 10 seconds. Your mom said it's for the B-roll.

And by then she's like clearly. So when her shirt starts to ride up, she's clearly having no fun at all anymore. And she starts like arching her back like crazy to keep it from being in the fucking snow. Like a cat trying to put in the carrier. So okay. So then we cut to the bar where Ashley is bartending.

No. No. Nobody's bartending here. She's wiping the bar, which is bartending. Why does it? Does every movie think wiping bar is like 99% of bartending? I've seen your people at work. Yes, it is a lot.

It's just not. It's ignoring my snapping. You weren't allowed in the front door. Come on. Of course. That I never met. So also at this bar, they have a bunch of bottles, none of which have a single poor spout.

So that's not great. Also, every beer tap has the stopper thing on it. so you couldn't serve the beer that's out for the alleged consumer of beer at this bar. And then there's, of course, there's one giant, very silly, like, TGI Friday's

ultimate margarita glass for that asshole at this bar in this small town who would order that. That asshole, by the way, is fucking David Owen right, because he had that in his home. Oh, I thought you're going to say Eli, but... But so when we cut to this bar... Mine was a Shirley Tepper.

Tim. But I insisted on that glass. I wanted it frozen. But when we cut to the bar, she's standing near the bar, wiping it. And Tim Mercer is there flirting with her. Ooh. This is one of my favorite parts of this movie, because there's a part where Tim completely fucks up his line.

And they just leave it in. And like, I think that David Owen Wright is just really proud of his ad living there. His repost. Yes. Absolutely. He was like, hon. Did you, hon, I'm too excited. All right, give a little thing.

Did you hear that when, when Owen forgot his line, I said, Cat got your tongue, we got to keep that. We'll just cut all that. That's like pig fuck. Do you remember when Paul Tamer Anderson made, you remember when Paul Tamer Anderson made Phillips Seamorhoff and too many takes in the master? And so he calls him a pig fuck and that's the only time anyone's ever been allowed to

go off script. Okay, so we're keeping that then? Very quickly so that the listener has any idea what the hell is we're talking about. So, yeah, at this point he could. He comes in and he goes, and he goes, hey, are you trying to take my wife and my job to Tim Mercer? And the guy goes, well, you know, like you sometimes do when you're trying to like, say a scripted line.

But then because David is such a goddamn thespian, he goes, can't got your tongue. And the guy just. After like 15 seconds of silence, he finally realizes to improvise something. And he's so proud of it. He looks at the ceiling for a while before he says that. And then the guy says his line and they're like, oh, that like feels real now. And I'm like, no, because people don't actually flub their lines when they're just saying what's coming into their hands.

Again, I hate to disagree with you, no illusions. But if anyone flubs their lines when they're saying words, they want to say out loud, it is the right family. No, that's fair. That's fair. And their thruple. I believe they say, let me take that again on a regular basis in Northern. Normal conversation. Oh, my God.

So he runs Tim Merceroff and now he's going to have a conversation with his wife. And if you're wondering if they've learned about lighting yet, they're shooting like him with a fucking open windows behind him. He's just a fucking silhouette.

It's terrible. It's ridiculously bad. They're so bad at everything. I love this scene where he, so again, he's supposed to be the sheriff and the bartender's supposed to be the sheriff's wife who he clearly, he hates women, clearly. And he hates her more than your average.

woman. And he asks her, like, something like, you know all them town secrets because you're the bartender. So can you tell me, who stole the Freetoes and also the young children? Also, what's the Scuttle Butt from the riffraff on the kidnapping scene around here? The Freeto's and the children. These are equivalent crimes. I am investigating. In fairness, as a bartender at TGI Fridays, I knew all about Frito. and the kidnapping scene. And the child and the child kidnapping. That's good to know.

It was the guy with the ultimate margarita. I'm going to go home and kidnap a kid. I'll see. Oh, you're at the ultimate with the quarevo? Okay. Yeah, yeah, no. That's great. We are friends.

So as another example of how far off of track, we've gotten in this episode, we actually neglected to mention that he does get a call about the missing girls before that scene. So, okay. So now he's gone to the scene. of the crime because he knows that one path in town.

Yeah. Right? He finds out that the little girls are missing and he goes, I'll check the path. I'll go to the kidnapping woods. That's probably where I'll find him. All the woods in Maine are kidnapping woods. And of course, what does he find but abandoned freedoms? Like Hansel and Gretel.

Yeah. Right. But this is, of course, where he finds Elena. Apparently the kidnapper just left her. there, right? No reason. Yeah. No reason.

Normal. Do you guys think it's awkward at the right household that mom clearly likes Scout best? Right? Because like in every movie, Scout is the main character of the kids. I got to be honest. Scouts my favorite, too. Well, she also looks the most like Ashley, too, I think. She does.

And she's, you know, she's a 3% better actress. Okay, sure. No, that's fair. Oh, you think it's an acting thing. It's an acting, 100%. Do you guys notice that when he finds Cadence? Is that her name? Is Cadence the younger one?

Yeah, yeah, Elena, yeah. When he finds her in the woods, he, I hate this. I hate everything about this movie. But I think that they think that if he looks down at her and says, you've got a nasty cut on your head, that we as the audience will be gaslighted into believing we see one. Yes, right. Because there is no cut on their head.

I wrote my notes. Like, did they mean to add that in post? Look at that nasty cut on the other side of your head. On the part in the way that's not facing. No, yeah, he's like winking into the camera. Don't turn. Did you guys notice his magabian, too? Yeah.

It was good. It was like the thin blue line, like the American flag that's all black and white. Oh, it was rough. I miss that one. Yeah. His enormous hat collection is on display in this movie. Here's one of them, yeah. He changes hats while walking in the woods, right?

So he brought a spare, you know? Seriously, in the middle of a scene, it starts with, I think, an American flag beanie. And then during that same scene, he's got a beanie that just says sheriff. But it's not just his hat, you guys. In that scene, he's walking from one side of the woods to the other. And at first he's in a sheriff's shirt with the with the star badge. And it actually says sheriff. He bought a pin that says the word.

Yeah, lapel. On the collar. And jeans. And then for inexplicably when he gets to the cabin, which we'll get to in a second, he's wearing like a cowboy hat and like an FBI style jacket that says sheriff on the bat. He fully changes clothes. Just him and Cash Patel. Yeah.

Just outside of the frame getting completely. He's naked changing clothes. Yeah. So meanwhile, so we cut to the bad guy, tie on Becky to a tree. And we got this moment where, like, you know, they're trying to hide from us who it is, even though there's only one other actor in the movie.

So, like, they're desperately trying to hide his face behind the tree as he ties Becky up. It's amazing. It's the best because it's a tiny little tree. Yeah. It's like a dog trying to hide behind, you know, like one flower. Right, right. No, I wrote it's like the later seasons of home improvements once they made the neighbor guy, a major character.

Yeah, he's Wilson. Yeah, right, right. So, but then we cut to, so David has now followed the fucking Hansel and Gretel Trail of Fritos to a house, right? So he checks the house with his gun drawn. And we have this long fucking scene where he's slowly checking the house for lighting.

Don't worry, he doesn't find any. Oh, and also, like, doesn't the door just magic open? It does. Oh, did it? I missed that. Yeah, the door magic opens. The door magic opens, and then he draws his gun to deal with, you know, a potential door goes. The wind.

Do you notice how he- Oh, damn, this is a beauty in the beast castle. I better shoot it. Fire everywhere. Do you guys notice how he sweeps the house, too, is he opens each door, because all the doors in the house are closed. He opens the door and looks in each room for one second and then closes the door behind. One full second. There is not, he's like one Missouri, not even one full Mississippi.

Yeah. Yeah. I'll have you know that he's taken several tactical. class. That standard police procedure. He's yelling red team go to himself. I'm red team. I'm all the teams.

I'm doing the finger gestures even though I'm the only one here. There's always a one finger and it's me. Shocker. They're not invested yet after how many films in a wide angle lens. So they can't show a whole. They're only filming in very small spaces. Because their sex camcorder doesn't have a wide angle. So yeah, and then as he's checking the house, basically his dispatcher calls him with a move the plot along reminder, right?

The dispatcher's just like, so what's up? Yeah. Hey, I'm just checking in. I'm a police dispatcher. What's you thinking? You just said, hey, into the radio. You said, hey, I don't know. I'm not responding to that.

I'm leaving you on listened. Just me texting, Heath. Hey. All the time. But what we learn here is that there's no record of this house existing anywhere. Why is he so mean to her about it? Oh, he's like, you're stupid. You're fucking stupid.

You know what? You're fired. Lock up, you are fired. Insane. Be funny if just the rest of the movie, whenever he radioed in, there was nobody there. And he was like, fuck, I forgot. You think I'm exaggerating. Like, the listener probably thinks I'm making that up.

But that's literally what happened. She goes, there's no record of it being there. He goes, quote, what are you stupid? You know what? lock up you're fired. That's the exact goddamn line. And my favorite, too, is that they don't have functional radios. No.

It's like you can hear that somebody's holding up an iPhone where they went like this. Yes. I'm a dispatch here. Are you okay? And he's like, I would call you if I had a problem. Leave me alone. Also, your elbows in the shot. Also, you're Ashley Wright doing a southern accent,

even though you already have a southern. an accent. Yeah. Would you rather fight 10 horse-sized ducks or one duck-sized horse? Ducks-sized horse?

We talk about this. So, okay. So then David stands in the house and he meditates for a second, but his spider senses go off. So he turns around to confront Santa the White. Oh, yeah.

We have a great, like Ashley's not paying attention to her own script moment where he goes, the Santa character, he goes, hello, Bobby Lee Grace. And that's the actual accent that the white actor uses, I should say.

My God. So, like, they had a script meeting, a writer's meeting in the right family together. And it was like, hey, what should this character look and sound like, probably? Just to, you know, shout him out whenever you have an idea. Santa Claus. Hello, Madza. Hank Azaria doing a very accurate Indian accent. Okay, we'll write that down.

I think they settled on this after more offensive ones. He was like, what if the guy is Chinese? And they were like, nope, you know what? The Hank is, you know, Hank is area, they did the problem with the poo, but he seems like he got away with it. So I think we should just move it over India. That's close to China, right? Yeah, people are okay with that.

But he goes, like, at this point he goes like, hello Bobby Lee Grace. And the fucking sheriff goes, like, how did you know my name? And I'm like, you're the sheriff. Right? Like, you're taking out ads with your name on him that say vote for Bobby Lee. Yes, right. But then he proves, he's like, I know you as well as you know yourself. And I'm like, you touched a stick?

But that's not what he means at all. No, it's not. But Gary has yet to be clear. That's important. But Gary Clark, and Gary Clark in his ridiculous poodle cut beard is explaining to us that he is Elijah. Yes, that Elijah.

You know the Indian prophet from the Bible. Yeah. What? It's Asian. It's not quite so, it's not quite poodle cut so much as it's like, I think it was a Santa beard. No, it's poodle cut, you guys. And then, okay. It's, he, they bought a Santa beard and they said, we need this to look.

Yes, they said, we need this to look different than Santa. So they went down to the local pet smart and they asked the groomer. It literally looks like every Shih Tzu when they first leave the dog grumer. It's amazing. Seriously. Gary is best in show. Yes. Watch how fast I can do that

that course. I'm stuck in the tunnel. Ashley, get the loop. Just leave. He's going to fall asleep. He'll fall asleep. There he goes. The darkness is taking me.

Yeah, there he goes. But Santa the White and David, Owen, right, they have a conversation where, of course, everything Elijah says has to be cryptic and weird, right? Right. But the amazing thing, is this is the first time we've ever had

Ashley try to write mystical wisdom but Ashley isn't very good at that no that what a polite way of explaining he's like the people will rise when I'm done

they get up yeah it's so fucking bad you what he goes he goes you know anything about this missing girl and Hank Azaria goes I know about a missing child but not the one you seek I'm like, oh, for fuck's sake.

Wait, what was he talking about? I did. Jesus or something? David. David is the missing child. Exactly. God's child. Yeah.

And he goes, at one point he goes, listen, look, you don't have it. I asked you for your name and you don't have an ID so I can arrest you. And I'm like, is this part of the Save Act? What the fuck is he talking about? I learned this the hard way when those cops pulled me over and I told him I was a fremin on the land. My friend Greg Locke had this. same issue. No, he didn't.

Never mind. Christy Noam just gallops in on a horse and tramples. Yeah, right. 100%. You guys know that that's what this guy is doing at his free time now. He is fully an ice agent. Oh, my God, you're right.

Yeah. Oh, he definitely applied to be an ice agent. And they were like, even for us, no. What if I wear a Santa Claus costume? Right. I have a ton of experience going undercover as a Yeti. And my wife wants me out of the house,

and she likes it when I have a uniform. I'm willing to tell you which of my daughters is the hot one. Oh, God. All right. We all have a lot in common. This is good. This is great. So, okay, so, but then Elijah says some cryptic Jesus wisdom.

And then David just leaves because they don't know how to end the fucking scene. He's truly confused by the word salad that Ashley wrote into the script for the Elijah characters. It's just like, I don't, I'm just fucking, if that's enough, bye, I don't get it. I'm good. I'm done now. Cut. Can we, can we do Yeti, folks?

Okay, well, I don't know about you guys, but I'm still a little shocked about seeing a non-right and a right family film, so I need a minute to recover, but we'll be back in a flash with even more of Restoring Grace. Hey, podcast listener, I'm Eli Bosnick, and I'm Heath Enron. You know, ever since we learned that Kara Santa Maria lost all her famous people money, we've taken some time to reflect. Oh, good. We're still on this. There are so many ways we can be careless financially,

whether it's losing a lawsuit to Justin Baldoni, like Kara did. That's not what happened. I don't even know that, but nothing happened. Or paying too much for your wireless service. That's why there's Mint Mobile. What's Min Mobile? Great question, Eli. Kara, listen carefully, please.

I will karate job you in the neck. Mint Mobile is here to rescue you with premium wireless play. plans starting at $15 a month. All plans come with high-speed data and unlimited talk and text delivered on the nation's largest 5G network. I don't know, Heath. Karen needs to keep her number so her lawyer could reach her about the lawsuit with Justin Baldoni. There is no lawsuit. Not anymore, there's not.

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I don't even know Justin Baldoni. All right, Heath. I'm sold. Where do I sign up? If you like your money, MintMobil is for you. Shop plans at MintMobile.com slash gam. That's mintmobile.com slash GAM. Up front payment of $45 for three-month $5-gabite plan required, equivalent to $15 a month. New customer offer for first three months only, then full-price plan options available. Taxes and fees extra. See MintMobile. for details. Hey guys, have you suggested selling her plasma yet? No, what? We were going to ease her into it. Why do I keep coming here?

Because we're your best friends in the world. No, you are not. Poverty has made you cruel, Kara. The thing you must learn, David, is that learning is a thing. I don't know about you, old timer, but ever since you came to this town, what are you doing? Nothing, nothing. Are you sure? Because I turned away And then it seemed like you were trying to just Batman away But you tripped on that chair

No, I didn't So So you knocked over your chair on purpose? Mm-hmm Yes, because As the chair falls, so does Man

Got it Sorry, you were saying about the poster behind you Oh yes, yeah So when I got this out Sorry, I know it's just I pulled something when I when I pushed over the chair on purpose

and I can't do the... I'm done with the conversation. Well, that's rude. Well, I'm bored. Okay. Okay. You got it. I got it.

No, you don't. You got a pole. Pull, pull. There we go. Yep. Yep, you got it. And remember... I don't think you should.

Nope, it's not the time. I understand that now. And we're back from... more of this shit. We're going to rejoin the action with Becky in the woods trying to get right with God while she still can't. Like she's acting like she's pretty sure this is God punishing her for the Fritos. Yeah. I love when these Christian movies run just like headlong into the problem of evil and smash into it by accident. I don't even realize it. Right. Right. Because she's like, hey, I'm tied to a tree and I have fucking Joker makeup. I got kidnapped. I'm really sorry about

the four bags of Fritos, but this feels like a lot. right now. God Almighty, it seems like you might be overreacting to the whole evenly distributed chips system. Maybe you just have favorite chips. So you eat those and then you restock them when you're out of them. Then you have the other ones when you want. I'll evenly do the Cheetos and the regular, the regular, I know everybody hates the regular chips and the variety packs.

And they always have more of those than anything else. I'll even eat those evenly. So then, okay, so then we cut back to David and Ashley at home. right? And he's trying to tell her about his day, but he can go fuck himself, right? Because the last time she saw him, he was like an asshole and the time before that. He said that he would literally rather have a cigar than meet her. Yes. But so at this point, he tries to apologize, but he only, he only like, it's just like just a tip of an apology just to see how it feels. Yeah. And he says, you know, I choose you over alcohol. And she goes, oh, you mean you're going to quit drinking? And he goes, no, I mean like there was a, like, there was a, like, a. Absolutely not. Like, if I could save you or alcohol from a burning building, I would save you. That's all I mean. I'm not going to fucking stop drinking.

You're crazy? And again, this is written in the script because that was the extent of the apology he actually made after he actually said that to her. So what I think is that, like, she wrote all these fulsome apologies and then he's like, no, here's all I'm going to say. Right. Nah, I wouldn't. I wouldn't say that. Here's what I would say. Right.

And we see a ton of edits indicating that, yes, in fact, he refused to do. the apology that was written in the fucking script for him to read. And we see these edits happen in their two camera setup that they apparently has. Yeah. But their two camera setup is a camera and then another camera two inches away from it. Yes. But like wildly different lighting settings. Oh.

If the rights ever find out about the owl, that little thing you can put on a Zoom call that just films everybody in the Zoom meeting, they are going to be set. Oh. cinema photography wise for the rest of their lives. So yeah, but he apologizes. I don't know even what you would fucking call that thing. But he tells her he's really suspicious of this guy Elijah because he has a fucking poodle cut beard

and who would have that. And, you know, and again, like this guy's got like a fucking 16 inch line of moss growing out of his otherwise kemped beard. So I guess he can't say shit. But the scene ends when the wife goes, well, he goes, you know, I'm no closer to

fighting this missing girl, though. And she goes, well, then get back out there. And he goes, okay, and leaves. My wife's always nagging me to find the lost children. I don't get to have a drink or have a nice slow-cooked meal. You know, something that maybe had to be in a hot pot for a little while. Or meal, chili, crackers, pancakes. Oh, goes best with V8 because it's too spicy days.

use the V8 for it, cut down on the aggravating spice. Sometimes I'm at a 45 degree angle and then I'm like, boo. So that we get... That's for everybody who watched the V8 commercial in the 90s. Yeah, right. Kara, you were supposed to get that for he. You broke his heart. I'm sorry.

You broke his heart. Saved by the bell. It was funny without even understanding the reference. Yeah, it gets it's better without the context. So, okay, then we get what Eli has accurately described in our notes as a looking montage. Wait, is this the first looking montage? There are going to be 11 more looking montage before this fucking movie is over.

We need to hurry this along. Don't we, though. Tell me about it, Kara. Do you mean our podcast, Kara? There's a lot more walking in the same spot in the woods to be spoken of. So what happened here clearly is that, you know, obviously- Cara has plans. Right.

They're always trying to pad time to get to that one hour, right, or whatever, because they feel like they can justify $2.99 if it's over an hour. But what happened is Ashley took her husband out to the woods and said, you know, walk around in the woods in this cop outfit until I come. And afterwards, she's like, all of it's goals. I can't take any of this out. That's why we have 22 fucking minutes of him walking her. around in the woods going, any clues under here?

Just looking in trees for kidnappers? It makes no sense what he's ever doing. Here's the thing. As a fellow cinematographer, I wonder if Ashley, as she gazes through the lens that sees the soul as well as the body ever thinks, I wish David had a less stupid face. Because he looks so lost at all times. Do you understand? He's trying to be pensive and he just looks confused.

Yeah, exactly. He looks like he's like, why more than one tree? Right. He's like at all times, his facial expression says, where the fuck did I park? Yes. So. How breathe? Can we talk about one insane shot here just that happens for a second?

Oh, please do. It's a scout who is still tied to the tree getting waterboarded by God. Yes. But in a good way. In a good way. Oh, no. It looks like she's getting. peed on. That's exactly what

I fully was like someone is peeing on her face. Yes, yeah, she's drinking the water from the sky and again, it's snowing, right? Like, you can just get snow. That's water from, like water from the sky is a thing. That's you, you don't need to. But it's coming at her from an angle. It is. No, as though God is pissing directly

into her mouth. And there's steam. It was hard to get the water bottle, the Aquafina bottle, to over the tip of the sex camcourt. They didn't want to get it wet. Right, no, exactly. Okay, so, but he goes back to the police station, and then just as he's taking a swig from his secret stash of alcohol,

Elijah appears in his office, Batman style. Okay, I laughed so hard. Could we get the Santa Ninja popping up out of nowhere, and then we get a spit take from David Owen right? Literal spitting. And an, like an exaggerated spit take. It's such bad spit take choreography. It's so slow, because he's facing away in order to make the ninja

thing possibly happen. So he drinks from his flask facing away. And then he has to like swish around his whiskey like Listerine and then turn around and then remember that he had to do a spit take. And then he's like, well, and he's got to do a spit take away from the guy, right? Because he can't spit on Gary. I mean, not. Well.

On camera. You know. Not when it's not his birthday. Right. Yeah. What's interesting is he does a, for his spit take, he doesn't do a, I don't know if I'll be able to communicate this in an audio medium, but I'll try. He doesn't do the big

spray spit take. He does the chaugh spit take. Into the bucket that was there just off frame, because he didn't want to mess up that room in their house that's supposed to be the sheriff's office. So yeah, but and then he says, and I quote, what are you a freaking ninja?

And then they have a conversation about how the newspaper is really promoting his opponent in the upcoming race. More than him. Yeah. To be clear, is still a child missing and Elijah is a prophet of God. Yes, but instead they're talking about how, you know, Tim Mercer's being ahead in the polls is really causing problems in his marriage. It's the best.

So Santa Ninja just shows up out of nowhere. None of this makes any sense. And right away, of course, this sheriff is like, how did you break into my fucking office and put that Santa Ninja just like, almost like a cat with a laser pointer just like distracts. Yeah. He's like, so you're just going to, you'll leave that puddle of whiskey spit there. Okay, you're going to.

What's on your mind? It's going to smell really bad in here. I feel like that would go really well with Coke. But at one point, Santa the White goes, he's like, you know, it is fruitless to worry. And I wrote, I hope for Eli's sake that that's wrong, right? Like, that would be really sad to learn that at this point. I don't understand where, so clearly they're having therapy. And then the sheriff realized.

is, you know, that this is therapy. And he's like, I don't want therapy. And he goes, you're by far a shrink. And I was like, does he mean you're far from a shrink? Yes, he does. Is that, are those the words he meant to say? You're doing a shrink excursion. That's what that means, right?

You're by far a shrink. Kara, I need you to understand the answer to this is yes, no matter what you say. Me and Heath, when we take our donkey rescue tour, can we trade one session of therapy? be with you for David O'clock. Oh my God. Oh. So, okay. And then Elijah goes to leave, but David

says inexplicably, he goes, oh, one more thing. What do you know about birds? Specifically, hawks. Oldly cromulent. What? How the fuck would you answer that question? I'm a prophet.

Yeah, no, okay. Tell me all of the bird things that you know. And Elijah's like, I'll get, that's crazy. I got this. I got this. Hawk wings. Spreads his wings over his.

Also, if you can think, God is my thing. So God would have spreading wings. Fly children of God. And you know, that's the end of the sea. You know what else he says at that point? We must trust in the Lord because his shoulders are broad.

What? That's always been my criteria for authority. For trust worthy. Yes. God's a big looks maxer. He's all about that convictular width. I'm not sure if I trust you. Let me get a ruler real quick.

How far apart are your shoulders? So, okay. So meanwhile, looks maxing, Carol, look it up. No, I know what that is. We're really into it now. So meanwhile, back in the woods, Becky's mascara is looking worse and worse by the minute, right? And did you guys notice that Becky is tied up with literal ribbon? Yes.

It's got like the Christmas box. on it. It's the stuff that comes in the Amazon bag when you add the $2.99. Right, yeah, yeah. So, but she looks, she looks forlornly for a minute. That's the whole scene, right? This is just scout, like, flexing or acting skills, I guess. And then we get another looking montage. In the same spot, he's already looked like three times. This is the same spot.

It's just back and forth over the exact same spot. Okay, this was the best because it's Bobby Lee, he's supposed to be a sheriff. So Bobby Lee, the sheriff, he's looking at, We're looking at, him look at, very obvious drag marks of a human being through snow. Yes. Which is a pretty big clue if you're looking for a kidnapped human being. And he's like, hmm, confusing. I wonder if this was a deer on its belly.

Yeah. And Santa is just watching from behind a tree at this moment. So for a second I was like expecting Santa from the background to be like, follow the drag marks. Fuck. What are you doing? He's fucking idiot. Yeah, I'm sorry. This is the first, and we see this a bunch of times from here on out. But this is the first time that we see Elijah golluming behind David as he looks. And it's fucking hilarious because he's always like the dog hiding behind the flower, right?

He's always just like just his eyes are invisible. Well, yeah, and to remind you, this is a man wearing a white Santa beard that is cut like a Pekinese. And then he's wearing like a white Canada goose puff. Huffer Jacker, and like white pants and a white beanie that is like he literally just bought it and put it right on his head. Right. It's blindingly white all the clothes that this man is wearing. And he's... With the Amazon Originals tag still on it so they can return it. Yeah.

And he's hiding behind a three inch wide tree trunks. It's very strange. And then, oh, what is this part? Okay. Eli, as our resident filmmaking expert. Thank you. You know Emmy award winner Kara Santa Maria. They show a church.

Eli wants you to mention that he was Tevia when he was in ninth grade, filler on the roof right now. If you think about if we had known each other, we both would have won an Emmy. Probably, right? If you think about it, it's probably a co-emmy. What is your question, Kara? Let Kara answer the question, Noah, or I'll kill your family.

So after this scene, they just show a church. And then they cut to the sheriff inside the sheriff's station. So my question is, is the sheriff station in a church, or do they not understand what an establishing shot, like, does for the... Yeah, it's a great question. It's like, church nailed it. Well, yeah, no, clearly somebody wrote to her and said, you need to add establishing shots.

And now they're right in doors saying, no, of the places the characters are. That's on me. That's on me, Ashley. I'm sorry. So, okay, so now he's, B-roll. He's back in his office and he's getting a call about Elijah, right?

And who, he says, you know, I'm well aware of the man they call snowman. Who is they? He is the only one who has spoken of this person in the whole film. I thought he lived in a cabin that doesn't even exist. I think he was like a ghost character. Right. Yeah, exactly.

But the mayor, this is the mayor on the phone. Again, another like non-character we'll only know from one-sided phone. conversations. The mayor wants Elijah arrested. And I'm like, for the accent, I get it. I get it. I get it. Yeah. But no, apparently for just being a stranger when there's a little girl missing. Yeah. To which David responds, quote, you run the city, I run the county. And I'm like, that's not how that works. That's not how the hierarchy of Longman. Also, that doesn't answer the question. Nope. The county is bigger than this. But again, the implication that the mayor also knows that

Elijah exists means that Elijah, this prophet of God, is desperately walking around town trying to do deepety vagary to rescue this child. And everyone in town is as stupid as David Wright's character is and is just like, I don't know about that. I don't like church. It's like, fuck, Jesus. What can you tell me about lobsters? Why does everyone have animal questions?

You're like a crazy person. There is so much in this scene. Like, it's such a short scene where he's just on the... the phone, but so much happens. Like dispatch calls him. And she's, you know, through the, through the radio on his chest, but it's not really coming out of the radio because the radio doesn't work. And she's my favorite character because she won't go down without a fight.

He fired her in the last scene. She's back. She's just still barking orders. He's forgot. Fucking Bartleby the scrimner over here. And she's like, you need to go down to old man manners farm. I don't remember the guy's name. Mr. Floyd.

Mr. Floyd's farm. It's his 98th birthday. We got to check on him. And I'm like, I cannot wait to see what this family thinks a 98-year-old man looks like. Yeah, we never get an actual person. What was the point? No, we get a way better cameo. Yes, yes.

Well, the point is sheep and donkey, right? That's what you meant by cameo. Well, yeah, no, she goes, the dispatcher's like, you got to go check out. He said he thinks there's an intruder. in his barn. There won't be, right? Nothing will happen here. Why is he 98, though?

Just because that's what Ashley wrote in the fucking... You'll have to do cop stuff if they're over 90 something. Apparently, yeah. Okay. So, yeah, so he goes to check this barn and we get this like ominous music

and then it opens up and we see one of his donkeys and one of his sheep and he gives him boobs. Yeah, I did write, oh, yay, animals with multiple exclamation points. Yeah. The right animals are getting cuter as the movies go on, right?

Yeah, right. Like a successful TV show. There's an inverse relationship between the talent. Or at least the movies are getting less cute. Yeah, this is a cognitive bias where there's like an anchoring problem.

Right. It's like a cuter by comparison. Relativity. Yeah. It's just physics. But the thing is, he just goes into the barn and he gives some snugs to the donkey

and he gives some snugs to the sheep. And then he leaves and he's like, nope, there was nothing in there. And that's it. We'll never refer to that again. So it feels like the sheep were jealous that Ashley didn't write them apart. It's like the sheep have a union contract in this or something. Exactly.

And they got their spot. Ashley was like, you got to just do this scene by yourself. I'm going shopping or something. So like you can tell that there's no one there to film him. Yeah. And he keeps moving the camera on a tripod and then walking into frame. Yes. And they keep him walking into frame over and over again.

It's amazing. So then, okay, so now it's that night and he's watching the news, right? Because apparently this small town has, you know, like sold out ad space in their newspaper. They got their own TV news network here. So it's a media heavy county. But we learn here that Tim Mercer, if he becomes sheriff, he's going to let him open a casino in town. Because this movie has no fucking idea what the powers of a sheriff are. or what the point of anything is.

Why is this part of this movie? It doesn't matter. Oh, he's in a fight with a casino of some sort in real life. Yeah, no, he learned, he was like, I played black for double after I lost on red, and then they, I still ran out of money. Yeah, right, right. 22 is closer to 21 than 19.

How could it be read five times in a row? That's impossible. physically unable. I said, let me look under the table for the Turk. And then they said, you're under arrest.

And I didn't give them my ID, so anyway, it's awful, cycle. Do you guys... Who's waiting outside of this bedroom door while Owen finishes

in my wife? Do you guys think that David Owen Wright is a raging alcoholic in real life? Yes. Yeah. Seem up to be.

Absolutely. Because there's this, There's this subtext to every movie that he needs to quit drinking. And then at the end, he's like, I'm just going to maybe cut back a little. You think maybe the fact that all of his wife's movies are about a man who needs to quit drinking played by her husband indicates that her husband needs to quit drinking? Yeah. There are so...

I think I might have depression, Kara. I don't know if you've read between the lines of old god-off of movies lore, but I think Eli might be feeling a little down. I'm not laughing at your depression. You are, though. She has to say that it's a therapist all the time. I'm not your therapist. I'm your friend.

I'm not your therapist. You heard me say she's my friend. She's my friend. So much of what we do would be horribly. Co-M award winner. He just cured a good deal of his depression. And the best friend. But really, there are a lot of bottles of alcohol in these people's kitchen.

Yup. Yeah. And every scene of this movie, he's drinking just straight, liquor. Yep. Like large glasses of it. And ones that are apparently meant as mixers. Yeah. And like he's swallowing on, like on camera,

he's imbibing a lot of alcohol and he's never really slurry. Like, I think he's a raging alcoholic and he needs help. Like I'm having more... He might just have a good tolerance. It's like evolutionarily positive that he's capable of the tolerance. Try to read between these lines

Kara. This one's a subtle one. Maybe he's just smoking the exact right amount of wind. I think of it as like a superpower. He has extra space in his house now because his wife doesn't live there. More activities that you can do. I am concerned as a mandated reporter, which I don't have to report

alcohol, you know, use disorder, but the children are underage. I thought you were going to mandatory report me for a second and I was like, what's that right now? You can't. No, Carol. I am concerned about Cadence and Scout. Yeah.

like there's a lot of like blink twice. I'm more concerned about Jaina, but yes. You gotta be more concerned about Jaina. They won't even let her play a member of the family. But Jena, here's my thing. I think Jana is over 18. Oh, okay, like she's already out. I think Jaina has explicitly refused to come back,

but now they have something on her. Oh, okay. Interesting. I think that's what happened. But the two girls, like, I worry. I think we need a wellness check. Right. That's a decent idea. Yeah.

Can we do a donkey tour slash wellness check? or do you think that would ruin the seriousness of the occasion? Seriously, if we do front and back of donkey, we could do a wellness check at the same time, sneak in, do all stuff. I don't trust you, too, to do a wellness check. I don't even trust them to do front and back at the donkey. I could do it.

I'll be like, who's getting fucked? Raise your hand. And then everybody keeps their hands down and it's fine. See? Okay. Everybody did not say no fast enough. You're all coming with this. We're going to show up and Heath is going to be shit-faced right along.

David Owen Wright. This guy. fucking knows it. Hey, can I say it's great with cocoa? So, okay. So, hey,

Kara, you remember when you said to me that we needed to hurry along? I just want to remind you of that moment in time. Hey, guys. So,

okay. So you guys want to fuck Ashley? She keeps making. Okay. Gary, Gary. Gary, Gary. I forgot the first letter of okay.

I was so desperate to move on. I went with A. No, Gary, keep the view. So, okay.

Okay. So the next morning, David goes to Elijah house and is still somehow surprised to see him, right? He Batman's into his own home. Dave's like, are you pre-following me? But apparently he's just stopping by for a quick, you know, pre-looking for the kidnapped girl today chat.

Yeah, it's like when I have work that I don't want to do for our job and so I like come in to make small talk with him, hey, what fiddle tune are you practicing now? Right, right, yeah. Go right, my headline. But this is where he explains that he's like, you know, if I can't find that girl, well, then Tim Mercer's going to use it in his campaign to make me look like a bad sheriff. Right, because I'm doing everything I can. He says that. I'm doing everything I can, which includes wandering in the woods, sitting at my desk and talking to you. Talking to you.

Studying fingerprint charts. I know those quite hard. It's one. Drinking. I don't know why. I've been drinking a lot. It's just one. It's true. But also like, there's only the one fingerprint.

Is his real concern right now about the missing little girl That it's going to make him look like a bad sheriff Because if so, he's a bad sheriff Well, that's the thing that they don't realize Like, that's what I kept asking while I was watching this movie Was do they, what is the moral here? Like, do they... Don't steal chip.

Is the idea that he's a bad guy who like turns good at the end? Drink less. I think they think so. Or do they think that he is a good? guy throughout this film. God, yeah, it's really hard to tell. They might think he's a good guy, but like, yeah, what's the morality? He sucks.

And the prophet of God fucking sucks. Also, yeah. Because he's like, tell me where to find the missing girl. You're a fucking prophet. And Olaj is like, let's talk about your election chances. Yeah. Birds. Right.

He's like that male loneliness epidemic. Would you like to know more bird facts? Yeah, he goes, have you prayed about it? He goes, I don't believe in that mumbo jumbo. And then Elijah says, walk by faith, not by sight. And I'm like, I challenge you to a hike. I challenge whoever thinks that to a hike. Hey, just fucking tell me, you're a prophet.

Just fucking tell me the answer. To be fair, he does look like he has been walking by faith and not by sight. I really wanted that to be the next scene as him just wandering around. Yeah, it's like running into trees. Just being like faith, faith, faith, faith. Jesus, Jesus, Jesus. Ah, fuck. Stipped on the girl's corpse

Oh no Jesus Christ Oh man All the thorns caught Right on my fingernail Right under it Fudge! Oh, all right

So many pieces Who's ready for another Looking montage? The best part about Noah Trying to restore this insanity Is that he keeps having to drag us Back to the movie

Where nothing happens And then fuck, it's another Woods Another looking montage Okay but this one We actually get an interesting establishing shot for a while, prominently establishing David Owen Wright's tactical belt that he owns and is very proud of.

And he's standing arms akimbo like Superman sticking out the belt buckle. Because he got to write it off on his taxes if he did that. Yeah. Like for sure, it's got like a hidden knife that pops out and like a flint to start a fire. No question about it. Yeah, little zipper with secret money hidden. Well, where you would hide secret money if you had. money to do that. Yeah. 75 different tools fit into this belt at once. Right. Yeah, absolutely.

So, and then we get him taking a call at the office from the Kidnap Girl's mom who also thinks Elijah did it. Yeah. And she's being a real nag about the fact that her child's been missing for 48 hours. And all he's done is walk to the same path up and down and up and down when he's not taking liquor breaks. Yeah. At the end of this conversation, he even goes, well, yeah, maybe Tim Mercer would be a better sheriff, but you're stuck with me. So go fuck yourself. I'm going to look for your child less hard now is what I'm implying, I think. Be nicer about me looking for your child's corpse. In effectually, yeah.

So then, so he goes home and he finds Ashley there, right? And he's like, well, what are you doing home? And she says, well, you know, the bar closed so everybody could go out and look for this little girl. Yeah. And what are you doing home? You're the sheriff. You're supposed to be looking for this girl. We had to do that because you suck.

Because you said, why would you not? Why would you not put together a fucking search party by now? And then he gets mad at the search party. He goes, they're not really helping. Yeah, he goes, I'm not getting any help. And she's like, get your pride out of the way. He goes, he says this line. This ain't about pride.

I can just do better than anybody else. Yes. I'm a better looker. I'm just better at looking. Y'all, I'm voting for Tim Mercer at this point. And I already know he's the kidnapper. Fuck. Yeah.

He knows which daughter to kidnap her. I trust him. She goes, are you here to get more whiskey? And he goes, well, how do you know I didn't come to see you? And I'm like, you were surprised she was there. You thought she was at the bar, man. Yeah. You're a bad sheriff.

She says. What does she say, Carol? That's a good one, Bobby, but my name's not whiskey. Oh, shit. Hey, owned. That doesn't make sense. I didn't, you could use you instead of, I don't. Got him.

She wrote the whole fucking movie around that comeback. It's so sad. For sure. Okay, I'm going to tell you what, if you keep my line where I say cat got your tongue, we can keep the line where you cucked me by saying my name's not whiskey. And I won't cry on the camera. I'll step to the side. So now we're going to get my best worst.

I love this scene so fucking much. So we get Elijah walking through the snow for a little bit because Ashley wanted to make sure that everybody was uncomfortably cold at some point in this movie. Well, he's got that comfy North Face Jackets. Well, I know he does. He does. It's nice. I would like to posit that at some point they had him just in the profit clothes.

And then he was like, guys, I'm cold. And they were like, okay, well, we don't think it'll change the movie or lower the gravitas of your character. If you're in a big poofy jacket. If you're in a very modern, poofy tag on North Face jacket. Yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah. So, okay. So then we cut to Becky and her mascara is all the way goth now, right?

So she's in some trouble. but just then a hawk shows up and regurgitate something into her mouth. That's what I saw, okay? That's what happened? I mean, so there's a hawk sound, right? And then something falls from the sky and she catches it in her mouth

and she goes, manna. Which is crazy because did all of us not just see her eat more snow? Yes, yes, obviously. But so, okay, so many fucking questions. First of all, how does she know what manna tastes like? Yeah. Right? Secondly, has she just been eating everything that falls her way?

She's like, oh, that was bird shit too. Fuck. You gained six pounds? She smiles. She's got no teeth from eating acorns that fell in. A squirrel leg is sticking out from between her teeth. What? Slippery.

She said a squirrel egg? Oh, leg, okay, wait. Oh, I was wondering for a second, I got you. I know squirrels don't come out of egg. That's why I'm Kara's best friend. It's the first quiz she gives you. When you're making an Emmy thing together.

Says if you want to work on this Emmy. So, okay. Where do squirrels come from? Hey, Noah, can you use that as the front of the episode clip? Because then we don't have to worry about anyone listening to the episode. They'll just say, oh, there it was. They all cracked at the same time. Oh, Eli, I cracked long ago.

I'm crying. So, okay. So she gets her mana. And speaking of writing shit off on their taxes, this is where we get to see David's cool little truck thing. No, it's a golf cart. It's a sheriff. Golf cart.

Oh, yeah, this four by four. But there's hay in the back for all the farm animals. Right, yes. Put some police siren lights on it. It's not technically not street legal because of that. I'm not allowed to use that on my other stuff. I have to remove them when I drive by the real cops. So he drives his little card out to that same spot in the woods.

It's dark now. He looks around in the dark and then he leaves. Nothing else happens in that scene. Right? We don't even get any fucking sheep boops that time. No. But now I guess they can write that off. on their taxes.

And then he alcoholics some more, right? He sits in a dark room, drinks. I love this scene. Yeah. And he reads the Bible. He, by the way, in this one, decanted his three-year-old mixer whiskey. You know, to let it breathe. You got to let it breathe, yeah.

And then they put it in a decad. Like, it would make more sense to decant Coca-Cola. Well, that's in the other mixer next year, because I don't know if you know this, but. Those two go. doer's second reserve or whatever the fucking drinking is is the perfect beverage to have with a...

It's a Scoresby 3, asshole. With a crystal Pepsi. I love this scene so much because they try to do like a moody shot of him smoking a cigar because it's pitch black. He's sitting in a pitch black room lights us up a cigar and it looks all moody and

cool. And then it goes out and it's just dark for an uncomfortable amount of time. And then he has to turn on his stupid fucking lamp, which has a pole cord on both sides for each of the two lights. And then she's like, well, this, now the mood's fucked up because it's too lit. And then they end the scene. Yeah, we watch a black screen of nothing for about five times longer than we see Santa in the woods for the first time.

He actually gets blackout drunk in a metaphor in the movie. Well, and then when he turns the light on, we see that what he's been doing in the dark this whole time is reading the Bible in the dark. And I think they honestly believe that this is good hero's journey shit right here. Oh, for sure. It's starting to come around. Yikes. Can I just take a moment to thank whatever prankster God convinced men that putting a cigar in their mouth was a masculine gesture?

It's watching every man. And it's not just this every man in every movie go, oh, oh. Manly man It's the greatest joy of my life Just fucking twisting his hands Around either side of that You're doing the fire star buddy All right

Well for reasons Unrelated to Eli's choke I need another break But first Let me give Axe me the hard self Will Sheriff David Owen Wright Rescue the girl in time Will he learn his lesson

And give up the alcohol Will he defeat Tim Merse? in the upcoming election. Technically no on all three. Find out which of those were trick questions and more when we return for the sheepless conclusion of restoring grace. Oh, no more she. Yeah.

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Don't worry. You're safe now. They took Emily. I know, I know, but we'll find her. I will search night and day to find her. I swear. Yeah, I bet he had a motorcycle. Oh, did you hear a motorcycle? No.

No, but he must have only had room for one victim because otherwise he would have taken both of us, right? Uh, well, yeah, I guess probably. So you agree he only had time to take one victim and it was just an arbitrary choice. I think I should actually go. Because I'm just like, why would you kidnap one kid and just leave the other one behind? Right.

Like, I'm a witness. And what's funny is actually, I'm incredibly docile. I would be way easier to kidnap. I'm sorry, what? She's not the pretty sister. I'm going to go. I'm so fun. You thought it.

You thought it And we're back for still more of this shit We're going to rejoin the action By checking in with Becky Who's presumably at this point Because it's been like three days Sitting in a fucking festering puddle Of her own excrement by now.

Right. Yeah. And also maybe dead Because she's just wearing a t-shirt And a leather jacket in the snow. No, she's not dead Because she ate that hawk vomit And that water that her dead

And those acorns. But how did she know? not freeze to death is my question. Well, wait, God. We'll get there. Oh, duh. Okay. God's love is warm, Kara. So you know that. Sorry I didn't know that. So then we see Elijah Batmaning into

David's office again. Right. And they're going to have another fucking heart to heart, I guess. This is where Elijah wants to turn himself in. Yeah, but not because he did it, but just because, like, it seems to be bothering David how many people are asking him to

arrest Elijah. He doesn't want him to to be hassled. Right. But the thing is, is that the movie doesn't clearly establish that, right? Because Elijah just appears

and he's like, I want to turn myself in. And David goes, I can't let you do that. And I'm like, well, up to this point, you would think he did it.

Mm-hmm. Right? Like, if somebody just comes in, it's like, I want to turn myself in for a crime, your assumption has to be that they did the crime, right? Yeah.

You would think. Mm-hmm. They're pretty confused about how criminal justice works because we actually see some of the whiteboard again here. Yeah. No.

No. Now it says, criminal history report, there's nothing there besides that. Just that as a concept. Just separately as a concept. He has a report due on criminal history that week. Yeah. As an idea map, they have criminal history report, nothing.

Just probable cause. It just says probable cause. Don't forget probable cause. Police words too. And still only 83 tickets, no progress on the tickets. No, he's been busy looking at that one trail. I was going to write more tickets, but that dead. girl's mom is really ratting me.

Like mother like daughter, my wife. So he's like, I'm not going to let you turn yourself in, Elijah. Let me give you a ride home. And then he stands up and in possibly the worst cut in Wright family history, it's now later he's in the same office. Elijah's no longer there and he gets a call from newspaper Tom. He might as well turn to a different camera like John Stewart and be like,

hello night later that day. I'm getting a call now. So dumb. But, yeah, but apparently newspaper Tom had a dream where a man in white told him he should probably sell ads to David after all. Was it the snowman, the guy that everyone in town knows about that's going to stab a store already? And you're the fucking newspaper guy. You'd think if anybody knew. Yeah.

So, okay. So then we cut to what they think is the big reveal, right? We're about to learn that Tim Mercer. was the kidnapper the whole time. He's the only other character in the movie. You guys did you see a throw mama from the train where the guy writes to

mystery story where there's only two characters and the one of them's dead? You know? It's like that. And we learn that Tim Mercer did the crime because he's on the phone describing his crime in detail to his buddy on the phone.

It's his bartender on the phone. You can't believe what. crime I'm going to come in for happy hour but first I got to go check out the crime scene of the crime I did in the kidnapping woods where I kidnapped. He's going like, he's saying into the phone like, I'm sure she'll be dead by the time this scene's over. Yeah. And can I say that there's something adorable about the right family, right?

Because like, look, I don't, I don't be gross because the girls are actually literally minors. But like, you'd worry that in a movie about a girl who gets kidnapped, right, there's something sexual or like, you know, that kind of thing. And they're just like, no, I'm just kidnapping this girl and leaving her to starve so I can win the big mayor race. It's got real Scooby-Doo vibe. I just got to keep her tied to this tree until I can get the casino into town with the deal

I'm making as the sheriff elect to try to get the local economy. With my sister, the mayor. If it ever occurs to Ashley to rope in the donkey as like a crime fighting assistant with a silly voice or whatever. We're going to have to stop. Yeah, right, we're going to have to shut the whole thing down. We're fucking cooked. Just made that movie with Hey. Yeah. We're good to go. Okay. So, but Tim Mercer freaks out, he gets to the little girl and she's still alive. And he goes, how are you still alive? Has some kind of hawk been vomiting manate you or something? And just as he says that, Elijah appears behind him and gives him the prophet's death poke. well point like no touch death

point at what I thought no no it's he's kind of from a distance that one god that's the one I'd like you to kill yeah he's just like boom pointed at you he goes point to him kill point to her free

well that's the fuck stuff thing right he points to the guy and he just dies and then he points to the girl and you're like oh stop I know what that finger can do but it's also confusing because he points to her and then she just undoes the ribbon That was tied around her wrists and angles. Let's go of the rope that she's been holding on to the scene tied up.

Yeah. I wanted to use my magic again so I did untie. I guess I could have just untied. It was just a Christmas, but it was just taped on, actually. It was like a clip on tie. Yellow ribbon. I wish there was a moment where he had to reset his finger and be like, let me turn this away from murder.

Yeah. Bring this bad boy down to stone. I have made this mistake before. Like a phaser. You know, when you're, you're trying to do the windshield wipers on the back and you forget whether you're supposed to turn it up or turn it to left or right.

Okay. So why does Elijah wait so long to free her? Great question. Like, what is the morality of this film? Right, because he doesn't get any new information. I guess he wanted to make sure she'd worked off those freitos. Learned her lesson. Yeah, and so she's like, you know, how did you kill that, man?

Are you an angel? and I'm like, do angels traditionally have death point as a power? Yes. And they're also from India a lot. You don't know. That's part of Asia. It's all part of Asia.

Sarah Huckabee, Sander, Wheel Within Wheels, Angels, watching from home, this makes sense. I love this one. Yeah, right, right. Finally, representation. But yeah, so,

but he explains that he was once flesh like her, and then he invites her back to his, quote, refuge, which young women, listening to the show, if anyone invites you back to his refuge, don't. Yeah, don't do that. Don't go. Especially if you just got kidnapped because then it's like, ah, you got to be kidding me.

Right. What are the odds of this? And she's like, she's like willingly. She doesn't think twice. She's like, no, if you were a bad guy, it would be all black that you'd be wearing. I get it. I get it. I know how this works.

So, okay, so meanwhile, back at the station, David's getting another call from the mayor about arresting Elijah because this movie seems to think that we needed three scenes of somebody calling him and asking him to arrest Elijah. It's weird, too. They're like, we've got a witness. Yes. Or is that what they say?

Yeah, the mayor says that a witness that swears. Positive ID. That's how they worded it. And he's like, positive ID, still not arrested him. He's a good man. Yes. You're like, wait a minute. This is an amazing crime if it is Santa behind this whole thing somehow.

That's true. Like a really big. Tim Mercer. He's the one that Tim Mercer was on the phone with. There you go. Right? This is all a double cross. Oh, Ashley, call us. Don't. Just don't call us. Don't really. No, don't. David already wants to kill you. Can you imagine the confusion with David Owen Wright if he had to do a double, triple, quadruple cross thing in a plot of a script? He would have no idea.

That's probably what she originally rode. He'd burn one of his daughters. Yeah. I think my favorite part of this entire recording is that every time we say his name, there's a moment where we go, wait, what's his name? David. David. David. We got to get him together for a movie.

Oh, yeah. That's what he used to happen. Okay. I think if we can get David, David, Airwight, addicted to a strong enough drug for a long enough time, we can make that happen. I think we can. But, okay, so then he goes to interrogate this witness who turns out to be Elena, who he's the one who found.

So what the movie admits at this point is that, like, she has forgotten up to this point in the script that he actually had a witness and he'd forgotten to actually question her. Or she was like, hey, how come she kidnaps, how come the bad guy kidnaps her and not me? And he was like, well, so that you can do your great acting in the scene with daddy. Yeah, right, right. And that great acting, you know what it entails? It entails remembering.

And what she remembers is very helpful because he asks, what was she wearing. And she says, well, I remember she was wearing her leather jacket. Useful. Anything else? Hmm. No, wait, earrings. Useless. Yes.

All right, I'm going to go back to the kidnapping woods and be like, here, earrings, earrings, earrings, earings. That's helpful. But then she's like, oh, sorry, one more thing. I think there was Indian Santa Claus dressed in all white in Oklahoma right before the crime happened, but I'm not sure. Right. So, yeah. So she's like, yeah, but I do remember. seeing a guy wearing white at one point.

And he's like, ah, that's what I've been waiting for right there. Right. That's all he needed to know. So now he's going back to see Elijah again. Once again, Elijah Batman's onto his own porch. It doesn't count when you're already in your own home. He's just teleporting back and forth like Scorpion. All right, man.

Like, I get it. Hey, man, do you spend most of your day hiding in various places in your house in the hopes that someone will come to off? He's gone. It's. get over here so but he's he's like you know

I think he says and I quote again the great Ashley right dialogue he says I thought you were a man of God or a prophet or whatever you are I call that Ashley writing by the way in case anyone wants the TM throw on there hashtag Ashley writing yeah he says I have a witness

that says you took the girl and I'm like that's not at all what you have right you have somebody who said they saw you that day. Yeah, and also leather jacket and earrings. No, this is very accurate betrayal of police work. No, okay, sure. Sure. Fair. But just then

Becky storms out and she's like, no, actually, he didn't kidnap me. I know that's weird because I'm here now, but he rescued me. It was Tim Mercer, was the bad guy. He rescued you and then didn't call me? He was gonna, he said he was planning. We were doing something at his refuge first. Oh, God. Oh, Jesus Christ. I look just like mom.

But oh, how old are the right girls? Oh, Eli, I don't think you need to know. I need to know for joke purposes. I think you're going to assume too young for that joke. Yeah, Eli, I don't want you to get off on a technicality here. Eli's Googling and doing slow math right now. Thank you.

Damn it. Why do so many years have sevens in it? So, okay. So, but they learn it was. Tim Mercer and then he takes him to see Tim Mercer's corpse. Right? He's still dead from the, from the finger thing.

And Elijah says, I think you'll find that he died of a sinful heart. Yeah, this is where I wrote, I hate you guys for making me watch this. By the way, first one of the whole, of the whole movie. Yeah, right?

That's so late. That's an improvement. Progress. Yeah. So late in the movie. It was just mystification up until that point. Just slack job. Then we get him like debriefing Becky down at the office.

Right? And like at this point I'm like, it would be fucking hilarious if he still charged her for the Fritos. Right. And he acts like maybe he's gonna, but he's like, no, I think you, you know, you got kidnapped, died in the woods for three days. Yeah, to eat all that hawk shit.

And you know what they say? Hawk shit's the best, less learn it. The best way to learn. Fool me once with hawk shit. It's the second one that I eat. Fuck. But fool me don't get fooled again. Gary?

There's this amazing long moment. Where he's like, he's like, now I need you to tell me the whole story. So she tells us like the story, but like it's all stuff that we saw in the movie. Yeah. She just gives us like a long detailed recollection of the film to that point. But with like slight details wrong. Yes. Because they couldn't like fully act out what they originally.

act out Ashley's vision. And that's extra amazing because we're watching her read from a script. She's not off book. And then she is for a second and then she's not for I'm sorry at the end of her bad speech.

And then Bobby Lee, the sheriff is like, hey start over that whole thing but remember more stuff. Probably remember it from the fucking script you have right there outside of the frame. This is the quote he literally says to her.

He says, just take your time. This is solid investigative technique here with a minor, by the way, a minor victim. He says, just take your time. Start again. I need you to remember more details. Yes. You fucked it up. You weren't very good at recollecting your trauma that first time.

Recollect it better. Do it again more, please. I bet the ignored sister was like, I would have totally been off the time. saying would have been off book. A real kidnapper came. I would probably get taken. Probably get taken. They would say,

oh, that one can memorize anything I need her to memorize. She's a good reader. Hostage video and supple. Readers are desirable. Okay. Maybe he's a sapio-sexual kidnapper. You don't know.

You don't know. But at this point, Scout explains to us it was so weird because she wasn't even cold. It was like God had protected her. Yeah, you peed warm into her mouth. Yes. I need you to pick a lane between

you don't want me off on a terror and God beat into this child's mouth. That is what happened. No, she's just accurate. Well, lots of things happen. We all watched that on film. She says bread started falling from the... They're going to take our Emmy away.

She says, bread started falling from the sky and he goes, I believe you. Yeah, he's like, sure, kid. Really? You believe? Seriously, Tim Mercer would be a better sheriff. And he's dead. Even after what we would. no happening. Right? Yes, exactly. He's a dead kidnapper and he still would be better. Yeah.

He's bringing in a casino? Local economy is thriving. Right. She says, you know, she says bread started falling from the sky right into my mouth and water too. And I'm like, you got to explain that it was a piss stream. Otherwise, that just sounds like you don't know what rain is. Rain is. Yeah, no, that's important. And then she tells us the finale, which again, we saw. We just watched. And then David's like, all right, well, that must be your mom coming by. Leave. We don't have another actor to play your mom. So go away.

And she does. Good job remembering the magical Indian Santa guy doing a death point on that second take. Good job. Yeah. You remembered more. After I reminded you to remember harder. Yeah. It seemed like that was an important detail.

Sure. But then he gets a call from newspaper, Tom, again. And that's just the end of that scene. So, okay. So, but now we need him to learn his fucking lesson. So we cut to him standing in the woods, smoking a cigar, the wise words of Elijah echoing in his ears. Oh, and there's a flag.

No fucking reason. Cigar, flag, Marica. America. Like, it's like the most ridiculous establishing. Sarah Huckabee Sanders flying on a falcon lectern, yeah. She's like, I'm doing art, y'all. You don't. get it. You just don't get it.

And now he's got to interrogate Elijah, right? He's like, so how did you kill Tim Mercer? He goes at one point, he's like, I'm not saying I'm glad Tim Mercer's dead. End of sentence. Which is weird because if Tim Mercer kidnapped a child and then tied it to a tree

in the woods in the hopes that it would starve to death so he could win a sheriff's election, you should be glad that Tim Mercer is dead. So the only implication there is like, I guess you could say, election season just got a bit easier. Right. Anyways, you think he fucked that kid?

Oh, Jesus, Eli. Also, I'm pretty sure we see a compromise between David and Ashley in real life here for a second. He got a concession that he could play with his giant knife that he got on QVC for at least one minute

in exchange for something. So I think that was Ashley's idea. I think she saw on the credit card bill that he had spent a lot of money. I don't know one of those goddamn QVC see knives again. And then she's like, well, you at least have to use it in the movie so we can ride it off on the taxes, damn it. Yeah, because they're making all this money that they need to put.

Yeah, well, right. So yeah, but then he's like, you know, how did you kill him? And just then he gets a phone call. And this is his half of the phone call. Hello? Natural causes? A heart attack? All right.

That's his whole. Which means that the other side of the phone call was, hello? natural causes a heart attack. Goodbye. And then you know what his takeaway is at the very end of that call? He goes, this Bible stuff, it's real? Yeah, he's like, you can give people heart attacks with that shit. I didn't know about that.

He goes, is this serious? And Elijah goes, it says serious as a heart attack. Fuck yeah, Elijah. And then David's like, I'll give you a ride home. And he stands up and he accidentally kicks his whiskey bottle, right? But he kicks it like he was taking a penalty shot. He's so overdosed. It's like an infomercial for like the bin for the keeping your empty whiskey's like a bowling pin

next to your desk, but you don't knock him over, bin. But yeah, he talks to Elijah considers not being an album. He would totally buy that, by the way. I have that. Shut up. That's how he knew the name. But now Elena and Becky are reunited. And Becky, by the way, is not wearing lipstick or a leather jacket now. So she's Christian.

Becky's Scout, right? Yeah. This must be so confusing to people listening to this podcast. No, they know. They know. They know the differences between the right daughters at this point. But so Elena, though, at this point suggests that maybe they should go back to the store and pay for those Fritos they stole.

I know. Like, somehow they worked in a subplot here that she deserved to get kidnapped because she stole Fritos. 100%. It's so judgy. Also, because of the leather jacket and lipstick. Yeah. Yeah.

Most of the leather jacket and the lipstick. Also, did you notice her cool drum kit in the shot? You know, she angled for that. Absolutely. They're sitting on a bed. So she's got a full drum kit in her bedroom right next to the bed. She does. Yeah.

I did enjoy her response. to Caten's. Caten's was like, yeah, we should go back to the store, pay for the Fritos because, you know, I'm the Christian character. Scout is like, I was, I was thinking we play the kidnapping card, right? Yeah. Seems like, no, I was just kidding. Of course, this is the end.

She's like, I was traumatized. I was tied up for three days. And then Cadence is like, and then we can forget all of this happens. I'm like, yeah, it's pretty forgettable. So, okay. So, okay. So now we're going to get David's apology, which is my fucking. fucking everything.

Is it? It's not an apology. What is this scene? How is this the end of the movie? This was the compromise. He got to show off his knife and now he has to do the apology. But the apology is like,

like again, what is the morality of these human beings who think that they are doing good in the world by making a film with these lessons? Christianity. Yeah, right.

But genuinely, I think Ashley wrote a thing where he's like, you know, I'm really sorry and I'm not going to, I promise I'll stop drinking and I'll go to, to church with you every day. And he said, I ain't saying all that stuff. And this is what he said

instead. Right? This is what he, as close as he was willing to get to an apology, even for the sake of this fucking movie, which is to say, I'm not going to quit drinking, but I'm going to guilt myself about it now. He literally said, no lie, I want to want to be better. Yes. Like, that's enough, right? She says, and I quote, I just wanted you to want to want to be a better man. That's, I'm like, man, want more for yourself, Ashley, Jesus. Seriously.

Oh. But he does all that. He does that complete non-apology of like, I want to change, but no, I'm not doing that at all. Yeah. Also, alcohol is not a sin.

I just want to stipulate that before we move on. Why would Jesus make a sin out of water? It doesn't make sense. But he has this amazing fucking line. He goes, you know, I didn't want a casino in the community. So I'm not going to gamble. with heaven and hell anymore either. Except kind of going to keep doing.

I'm not doing anything different, so I am doing that. Alcohol's okay. And then he tells her, oh, and by the way, on Saturday nights, I took a gig bouncing at the bar you work at so I can maintain an even higher level of control over your environment. I hope that's okay. And she goes, oh, you, and they laugh like the end of a fucking Scooby-Ducy-Duc. cartoon about that.

I got so excited because the Wright family might make their version of Roadhouse about him being the bouncer. Right house. Heath, you probably couldn't hear me because of the Skype. What did you say? I said, right house. What? Keep this.

Yeah. So yeah. Eli, what was it? But then the, he said, right house. Thank you. There's the laugh. Emmy Award winner. Kara Santa Maria presents a CSM joint.

But now we can't get out of the movie quite yet. Because now David Owen Wright has to go, see, I said it all the way right the first time that time. David Owen Wright has to go back to see Elijah. But when he does, the house is missing. The right house? No, no. Don't make metaphors. Don't mix your metaphor.

I didn't even notice because that's not a very good job. I'm sorry. Oh, shit. Maybe the movie could be about racial tensions in their small time. It's called Do the Right Thing. This is me for the rest of the show. Luckily, there's no more time in the show. Yeah, right, right, exactly.

This is the end. Yeah, but there's nothing left here except a Bible open to a thing about Elijah. Yeah, he disappeared and materialized into the Bible that happened to be turned to the page where they talk about him. Yeah, yeah. And then we get our credits where we learn.

that the guy who played Elijah was named Gary Clark and I'm like, yeah, I thought it was probably Gary. Grupple, yeah. So, all right, well... Wait, wait, but Eli, what's the sheep's name? Oh, the sheep's name is... Sorry, I already got down to my... It's Pudgy Paul.

It's Pudgy Paul. The sheep, guys. Yeah. I like the rights better than us. They wouldn't have made any of those jokes about our kids. Exactly. No, 100%. All right. Well, Kara, thank you so much for suffering alongside us yet again. You're welcome?

And hey, the next time we see you, Kara, it will be live in San Francisco on Good Friday. I so excited about that one. Yeah. I am not. I'm coming, though. I will be. If you want to hear more from Kara before, then be sure check the show notes for a link to her podcast Talk Nerdy. And while that does it for our review of restoring grace, that's not going to do it for the episode just yet, because we still haven't learned our fucking lesson.

So Eli, tell us, what's on deck? At 7.7 p.m., the occult club members are holding a ritual ceremony to summon Master Salt in Khamano Girls High School in Tokyo to help one of the members, Nanako, who has been struck with mysterious incidents. We'll be heading into the live-action world of the, happy science cult with the divine protector. Master Salt begins.

I was like 80% sure you were pitching me porn again before you said the happy science cult. So I will take it. Oh, that was this week. So for not quite porn to, oh God. So with not quite porn to look forward to, we're going to bring episode 548 to Merciful Close once again, a huge thanks to Kara Santa Maria for all her help today. And an equally huge thanks to all the Patreon donors to help make the show go.

If you like to have stuff among their ranks, you can make it for episode donation to Patreon.com slash God awful and thereby our early access. to an ad-free version of every episode. You can also help a ton by leaving us a five-star review and by sharing the show on all your various social media platforms. And if enjoyed this show, be sure to check out our sibling shows, the scathing a citation needed D&D minus

and the skepticrat, available wherever podcasts live. If you have questions, comments or cinematic suggestions, you get a god-offel movies at gmail.com, Tim Robertson takes care of our social media. Our theme song was written and performed by Rice, Latin and Vivuladry on Mars. All the other music was written and performed by our audio engineer Morgan Clark and was used with permission.

Thanks again for giving us a chunk of your life this week. For Heath-Inright and Eli Bosnick, I'm No Illusions Promise to Work Hard to Work Hard to Earned on the chunk. graffiti clothes. Before she was fired, Christy Noam tapped David Owen Wright to direct, produce, Wright, and star in the newest

ice recruitment video. Pudgy Paul went on to tell Eli shit about the rights that drastically changed his opinion. Ashley Wright continues making AI-slop Christmas movies about horses, five seconds at a time, and we will

be watching all of them. watched one last week and it was magnificently bad. All right. I got lost on the Wright family website at their slew of alien of AI films.

I am specifically very excited for Forgiven for Christmas, which appears to star a small Santa, a big Santa, Mrs. Claus, a panda dressed in a toy soldier outfit.

And what I can only describe as didn't go into the Santa business, Santa. Okay. I'm going to post, give me once, I'm a scroll so that we're all on the same page because I need you to see this. First of all, I need you to tell me that this wasn't my cracking moment and I just like missed it. Tell me I'm describing that in correctly. Where is it? It's at the top of interstitial one. Is Santa who didn't, is non-Santa the one of the right?

at the top of interstitial one. You don't? I don't see your cursor on this. There's an image. He just dropped an image into it. I'm not seeing it. Why do I see it and you guys don't see it? I see it.

Yeah. I'm not showing up on my next. Let me refresh the page. Yeah. Oh, there it is. Yeah. There it is. For whatever reason, didn't update to me.

Sure. Sure. Okay. I think about that a lot. I'm thinking about this. This is what I'm thinking about. In case you guys, I want to know what I'm thinking about

anytime in the next six or seven years it's this picture. Okay. It's good to know. It kind of has like a Freud look, the Santa to the right, like evil Santa Freud. I want him to have Carl's voice.

Ah, fuck. Or he's just complete, like it's R-rated just because of his character. Like, oh no. Peppy the panda's loft in the snow. Fuck you. Fuck you all. God damn it.

This fucking place. It's so fucking cold. I think we could just... Why are all the buildings around them in ruins? I have. So here's the thing though, Eli. Because it's an animated movie, we could just do our own voices for the characters

and we could tell people to like just play our audio over this movie. And it's AI so it's uncopyrightable. I don't know if that's true. But one way or the other, they can't get us for just making audio that sits over top of it. That's right. If anything, we're helping them out. This is my movie now.

The buildings are in ruins, by the way, because evil Santa Claus, it turns into a giant and smashes through the... Yeah, clearly he has rampaged his way through here. Yeah. Is that something you know or something you believe? That is something I know and believe. Amazing. All right.

All right. Interstitial one. All right. Here we go. Oh, wait, wait. No, I got to... Okay. Sorry.

I was going to be... distracted. I was too. I'm glad you erased it. Damn it, Candace. Oh, it's Cadence. Fuck. You know that I looked it up and he misspelled his own daughter's name in a Facebook post? He wrote Candice first.

Okay. Oh, here we go. I've been watching Friday night lights from the beginning. And this voice is here for good. It's in your heart. It's in your soul. Let it out, Queen. I'm right back to this. This is your safe space to use

voice. All right. Can you guys hear the lawn work that's going on outside my house? No. Okay, good. All right. Awesome. Then Rocket Money.

All right. People who haven't seen the movie are going to think that was racist, Eli. But you were just accurate. No, you were doing an impression of a white man doing an impression of an Indian man that wasn't very good. I'm a dude. I'm a dude. Yeah. And this is more subtle than his.

Yeah. It was much more culturally sensitive. More consistent. It was more consistent for sure. Yeah. You remembered you were doing it for the entire scale. Big shout out to my vocal coach, Hank Azaria. Wait, I have a quick question.

Not that I'm trying to horn in on your space here, but why am I not the girl in this? Why are you not the girl? Yeah, an interstitial three. You can be the girl. Who is going to be the girl? Me. Can I hear your girl?

Yeah, it's this voice. The voice I always do for girls. All right. It's a girl voice. You be her. You're going to be better at this. Nope. Julian that from Hank Azaria?

Women don't count. And true crime couple ad. My wife will love this show. Oh, can I tell you a story about my wife real quick before we do this? Sure. You'll love it. So my wife is serving on the grand jury in the town right now. And, of course, as a grand juror, she can't tell me anything about the cases that she hears.

So on an unrelated note. She's telling you, though, right? No, no, she would never do that. On an unrelated note, I know about this murder that recently happened at the prison near my house. And normally, you know, that's not a good setup for a comedy bit, except for the guy, after he stabbed his cellmate with a shiv and murdered him, weekended him? Is it weekend at Bernie or a weekend at Bernied? I think it's weekend at Bernie. He tied up.

Weekend added Bernie? I don't know. I think it's like attorneys general. Well, that's what I'm thinking. Yes. So he tied a line to the guy's wrist. And so when they would come to, like, let him out for whatever, he would just, like, pull the thing. And they're like, as though the guy was just waving him off.

And that worked for, like, 36 fucking hours. And then eventually he was just like, well, this ain't going to, I can't make him walk. So this isn't going to work. So then he eventually just kind of turned himself in. He said, hey, I killed by my cell. made over here. But, but like, I just, I love that like, like, because like, you know, it's solved the problem that's in front of you, right? Like, he didn't think what he was going to do in 36 hours, right? He thought, okay, the immediate problem is this. And maybe I'll think something up, you know, in that time.

But like the Iran war. Yeah. Yeah. Exactly. But also, why do they need to convene a grand jury to decide if this guy should be indicted? It's clear that he did the murder. They didn't. I don't. I don't about what they did with a grand jury, Carol. What are you talking about? But that's all a grand jury is. I don't know. There was a grand jury involved. I wouldn't know.

Why are you getting the law involved? Are you a cop? You have to tell. Sorry. Yeah. Yep. Sorry. I'm a narc.

I'm a narc. That's all that is. Carol, Santa Maria. Lover of cops. Yeah. So I feel like this guy went back to jail and he was like, hey, guys. So, have you seen Ferris Puehler's day off? I'm thinking we can just break out of this place because I got a CEO for like 36 hours.

He was using a string. Yeah, right, right. You know he had to be like, I killed my cellmate, and they were like, oh, man, let's go. And he was like, wait. There's more. Wait. I'm explaining the string if I wanted you to find out the cellmate thing. Wouldn't let you in.

So, Noah, I take it you live in a small town. I live in a small town. Yeah. Why, you don't think you can get away. You can't fucking weekend at Bird is your cellmate in a big city? Is that what you're saying?

You're saying, Yeah, those sophisticated cartoon rhinos keeping track of Jeff Epstein. They were doing great. Zoran, Monty. Yeah, right?

Full puppet that motherfucker in, Ryker. And your editor loves you guys. All right. True guy. Crime couple at it. Hi, Morgan. I wanted to say, I was about to say, well, we got him this nice trip to New York, but he had to drive himself.

So we just gave him a place to stay. All right. And a very lovely weed dinner, but he doesn't smoke or eat weed. So it's just a dinner for him. Well, that one was a weed dinner whether you wanted it or not. Well, apparently, yeah. All right, here we go. Did I sound far away enough?

He sounded pretty far away. You sound pretty far away. Morgan, make her sound more far away. That's why he hates us. That's why he hates us because Eli will put in a sound effect and it'll just be like goat orgasm. And then Morgan will have to go apparently jerk off a goat or something, you know, to get that sound.

I don't know what he does, but he does. He always makes it work. Is this the end of our file? Yeah, this is the end of the file. Probably should have ended it before I said that about Morgan. Yeah. Okay, stop. Kara comes back to full volume.

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