God Awful Movies - 575: Operation Hope

Episode Date: September 22, 2026

This week, new guest masochist Josh Boerman from the Worst of All Possible Worlds podcast joins us to review Operation Hope; a movie that loops all the way around from terrible back to masterpiece.Check out more of Josh's stuff here: https://www.worstpossible.world/If you’d like to make a per episode donation and get monthly bonus episodes, please check us out on Patreon: http://patreon.com/godawfulCheck out our other shows, The Scathing Atheist, The Skepticrat, Citation Needed, and D&D Minus.Our theme music is written and performed by Ryan Slotnick of Evil Giraffes on Mars. If you’d like to hear more, check out their Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/EvilGiraffesOnMars/Report instances of harassment or abuse connected to this show to the Creator Accountability Network here: https://creatoraccountabilitynetwork.org/

There's also this great moment where he's explaining how the people died, and he says of one guy, his head was turned completely around. So back to normal? Yeah, that's what, right? Is that 360 or 180? We were like, that guy is, how did you know? We thought that guy was totally normal, and then we took his shirt and it was twisted. He was twisted back around, yeah.

We let go and it went, whee-w-w-hmm. And then we kind of had to wait for it to settle. Yeah, because then it went the other way again. Go a little through far. Yeah. Yeah. Awful movie. Movies.

Welcome back to the Gamcast where each week we sample another selection from Christian Cinema because that's what it says in the description. I'm your host, No Illusions, and sitting 700 miles to my immediate left is my good friend, Heath. And right, Heath, welcome back. We got superhero? I think. I don't even know.

I honestly don't even know. I don't really know what happened in the movie. Superhero. And that voice came from 900 miles to my northeast and belongs to my bad friend, Eli. Bostic, Eli, how are you this fine afternoon, sir? I'm incredible, Noah, strong, alive, powerful, excellent, filled with hope. And we're also excited to welcome in a brand new guestmaskist. Josh Borman is the co-host to the worst of all possible world's podcast, which makes him damn qualified to sit in with us.

Josh, welcome to God off of movies. Hey, how you doing? Glad I could be here. Glad I could talk about. actually one of the best bad movies I've seen in quite a while. It's pretty. It's delightful. It's pretty fun.

So I'm just curious, the worst of all possible worlds, that's just current events podcast then? Media, actually. I mean, it is, we do cover things sort of through the lens of what is going on in the world right now. But basically the tagline of the show is case studies in the pop culture of a dying empire. So every week, what we're doing is we are taking a look at a different piece of media. and talking about sort of all of the narrative choices contained therein and whether they sort of contribute to our ongoing decay or not. Awesome.

And yeah, yeah. And we actually have a particular fascination on our show with bad Christian media specifically. That is how I found out about you guys, because you have also done an episode about one of my favorite pieces of bad Christian media, which is the musical movie High Tops. Yeah. All right. As well as a hero the rock.

incredible, yes, obviously. And so I was like, that was how I came across you guys originally. And I was like, oh, you, you are, you are my people. Like, you understand something, the thing that makes these like weird Christian movies bizarrely compelling. But the weird thing about this movie is I don't think it's like a Christian movie exactly. I don't think so. So let's kill the- Christian the way like everything the Trump administration does, it's kind of Christian. Yeah, we'll get there. So tell us, Heath, what will, we'll, we'll, we'll, we'll get there. So, we'll, we'll, we'll be breaking down today? We watched Operation Hope. It's the story of vigilantes, drugs, and eating people. But not the Army Hammer biopic from July. It was a different... And Eli, how bad was this movie?

Well, if you loved hearing from your friend's mom about her kick-ass Ty Boe class, but you wish more of her description and involved her husband's sexual role, play. You will love this movie. I fucking loved this movie. It was an absolute fucking delight, yes. It's such a delight. Everything about it is bad and none of it is half-assed, right? Like, you talked about this before, but there's nothing that bothers me more than

ironic bad. You did it. I didn't try. Oh, good. Oh, man, you managed to fail along with 99% of the rest of me. you did try. We know you were trying. You also totally fucking tried and you couldn't write a scary movie about a turkey and you fucking gave up, you ironic pot smoking asshole. This woman fucking walked into her living room, tears streaming down her face. She slammed it on the dining room table, knocking over her many children's juice and beverages and said,

my masterpiece is complete. An absurd amount of money was spent on this movie. Yes. Yes. And so clearly as well, the writer and director behind this as well, not the woman, but the other guy who we're going to be talking about.

He just, this is also a passion project for him. This is a guy who loves the craft of movie making and is unbelievably bad. He can't do it. Also, he is sexually a karateist

and he got to put that into his passion project as well. Like the rest of us. Like we all are, yeah. There were moments where I stood up and cheered. this movie by myself. I can't.

Kipped up at one point and cheered this movie. No, I'm going to cry. It's going to be like Fast 10 is. I'm going to cry a lot when we talk about it. And I'm going to, I need the space held. At one point, my wife walked in

as I was watching this movie and I was just doubled over laughing. I was in tears laughing. It was so good. All right. So is there anything you just want to nominate this from free and the best of being the worst hat? Okay.

Besides best worst Kipup, we'll get there. Best worst. How dare you? Rotten tomatoes. rating. I went there and Ron Tomatoes just like didn't know. Their rating was N slash A.

They were just like, I don't fucking know. It's probably bad. It is unrateable. It is. We don't even know. You go on there and you give this movie 100%. You certify this fucking thing. I already put this bad boy in my letter box.

100%. Yes. Well, so, okay, so Keith has already hinted at mine, but I'm going to go with best first karate master montage. Mm-hmm. And not, like, If that did you, this guy, okay, this guy who comes out and does a kip-up, given his body style, I would have been less surprised if that man had come out and divided by zero, right?

I was so happy. I was like, there's no way. There's no way to describe it. There's no possible way. Glorious hip-up. There's no way to describe. I mean, I'm glad we're, look, I know we're in an audio medium for vast majority of our audience, but run, don't walk. to watch this Kip.

We'll get to it when we get to it because we need time and space. Emotionally, we need to be ready for it. I'm holding space for you, Eli. But it's just, it's the most perfect. We'll talk about it what happens. I can't talk about it now. We need to savor it all the way up.

Here's what I will say. When I saw it, I ran to the top of our notes and seeing, I found out about my father's dead in the parking lot of a cracker barrel. and the second most, it's now the second most disappointed I've ever been looking up here and seeing that Noah had called Gibbs

on best worst. A lot of disappointing stuff happens to you in the parking lot of Cracker Barrel. Yeah. So for me, I'm going with best, worst, age inappropriate casting. Yes. I'm not sure that there are any roles in this movie that are

cast correctly in terms of age, like believably. And it's in the main roles, are specifically the titular role, Hope, is so age inappropriate that it breaks the movie, which is one of the things that makes it so. I thought it was like good representation in some sense, in a crazy sense.

I kind of enjoyed her, yeah. Well, so okay, so here's what clearly happened here, right? Is that this woman walked up to her boyfriend or her husband or whoever the director is to her. And she said, I can play 26, right? And he says, of course, baby, yes. Absolutely. Absolutely. Absolutely.

But here's the meta layer that's funnier on top of it. As we get older and as our wives get closer and closer in age to these women who tell their husbands, I can play 26, our jokes get tamer and tamer. Ten years ago when we started this show, I would have had 20 clean minutes on Hope and her dusty old badge. I'm married to a woman who could have gone to high school and or college with Hope. I need to fucking watch my piece and cues. I'm like, yeah. I mean, it's a little bit older than she might want to be. But, you know, that's what I'm playing.

I feel like with hope, though, she said to her husband like, I can play 26, right? And her husband who is 26 was like, yeah, totally, babe. Absolutely. By the way, did you get me on your insurance? Because I need. Because I'm getting killed my parents. I'm going to hurt myself at Carate probably again.

Do we know for a fact that she is, in fact, like, the director. writer, producer's girlfriend wife. No, I looked into it because it seems like it must, that must be the case. It seems like it, certainly. All my jokes are going to be premised on that idea. I also looked up this actor and saw all the

videos on Instagram of her doing yoga and gymnastics, and that's why I was looking at those videos. It was, uh, because I was doing research. Pure research. He was in the background at any point. Eli, you got a best worst for us? Yeah, it was, uh, best worst mask. Fuck, yes.

So you know how sometimes you're watching amateur pornography and she's wearing one of those little lace masks and you think to yourself, why is she wearing that? It's not hiding her identity. Surely if friends and family or members of your community saw this, it wouldn't be like, well, I have no idea who that is. That will be the superhero mask that she wears. It is the don't get come on it.

We've only got one mask. It will be what she wears. So many times people are like, oh, is this like, you're like an eyes wide shut superhero? Are we like fucking? Exactly. Right, because I could recognize you. Because I'm into it. Later.

All right, well, we've got a ton of superfluous storylines to tackle on the other side of this break. So we're going to keep it brief. And when we come back, we'll dive into all the unrelated action movie tropes that are Operation Hope. All right, kids, your mother and I, we'd like to talk to you about what you walked in on last night. That's right. We would. It's important. Right. So when you came in last night, you probably noticed that your mom was wearing a special outfit. It was funny looking. Would we say funny or?

Also, it may have looked like she was, she was hitting you. She was hitting me, yes. That is all because we were. Practicing. Practicing? Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Practicing what?

We were rehearsing for our new superhero movie. Superhero movie. Oh, and that's why she was wearing a mask. Yes, yep, that's why. Wow. Well, I can't wait to see the movie. Yeah, no, totally. I'll see there.

Now, now, why don't you, why don't your kids go run and play? Okay. Yeah, yeah, sure thing. Okay, bye, bye. And I hope that operation worked. Wait, what did you say? I was just saying the name of the movie. Oh, okay.

I'll buy a camera. Good, yeah. Nice one. No. Right. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Hey, podcast listener. If you can wake up tomorrow better at one thing, what would it be?

I would do a Kipup like the Fat Ninja in this movie. Right. Okay, but for most people, it's about mindset. Being more present with friends and family, being kinder to themselves. And for BetterHelp, it's a Better Help therapist who really gets you. I want to do the spinning kicks that he does too. Will the therapist help with that? No, probably not.

But they do have a lot of therapists who can help you. Plus, if it doesn't work out, you can switch therapists at any time for free. So no awkward therapist breakups? No awkward therapist. No awkward therapist breakups. Because I tried to do a Kep Up in their office and maybe I had a little accident.

And now I feel like it can't be vulnerable about them anymore. Yeah, also not that. Sign up and get 10% off at Better Help. dot com slash awful. That's better. AGLP.com slash awful. Hey guys, you ready to record? Yeah, Eli was just saying he wants to do kip-ups. Really?

Kip-ups? After what happened in your therapist's office? Oh, he told you? He told everybody. Oh, I knew I should have used BetterHelp. And we're back for the breakdown and we're going to open up on a narrator basically encouraging us to just live, laugh, and love, guys. Okay, so we're going to talk about this a lot, but I do want to talk about the politics of this movie, right?

Because this opening montage, I'd love you to explain them to me. Yes. Okay. So I actually have a pretty unique perspective into this because none of you have something that I have, which is a Jewish mother. And if you've never talked to a Jewish woman over the age of 45 about her politics, I can see why this movie would be confusing. But if you've ever done that, you know that Jewish women just sort of have.

have, I'm going to say, misguided progressivism Tourette's. I have talked to your mother and I know where we're going to. A hundred percent, right? You will just be talking to a woman of Jewish descent and she'll be like, and we went to that sandwich shop by the street. She, I'm forgetting that woman's saying, she had the gay son.

And I think it's so terrible that they can't get married. They should get married, but not mere kids. I had a very similar experience one time when I was just like talking to a Jewish lady at a bar And we were I made the huge fucking mistake of like starting to talk about politics for some reason But like we were able to find some consensus Up until she was like and you know

We just we just need Israel because at the end of the day They're all going to try to kill us Oh my God. All of the Arabs. They're all going to try to kill us All of them interesting. Interesting yeah is blocking well I mean because that's like that is clearly the politics of this movie right Because we have this weird, like, who knows what is even the connective tissue between all of the issues that they bring up. It ends in all lives matter.

And then it's like we all need to get along or else. And then we see a nuke. Yeah. Truly insane. So first they do a list, which I was baffled by. It was like, Bubonic Plague, COVID-19, Roe v. Wade. And I was like, what's happening now?

Circle the one that doesn't go on. What? John, Grads matter. We didn't start the fire. Are you doing Billy Joel? Okay. And then they somehow land on all lives matter or else mushroom cloud. Yeah.

And they talk about the LGBTQIA community. You can hear the fucking scare quotes around community. Yes. You've never, no one adds an IA faster than a misguided ally. They're in there with the and now there's a plus sign in numbers. I want to help. And the fucking smash cut as well from like a deserted time square during the initial acute period of the pandemic to Adolf fucking Hitler himself.

I guffaw. What were we doing? Wild point. Also, just people need to do better understanding the very simple concept of all lives matter. So like the argument you get is like it's like if I said grill cheese is good. And then somebody's like, no, all sandwiches are good. And it's like, no, well, first of all, no, they're not. But you're missing the point either way.

That was a crazy response to what I said. Don't matter. Heathen, right. So then we heard him. Not grilled cheese for damn sure. I think he might be an older Jewish woman. Yeah, might be. Ranking sandwiches, grilled cheese would be like top of the pyramid, genetic.

Go ahead. Okay. All right. So we see this. My calipers to measure my sandwich. So we see this doctor. He's running down the hallway. And he comes in.

This is such a why would we start the movie like this? He runs in and he says to this guy, he's like, hey, you have to choose your wife or the baby. And he goes, uh, uh, uh, fuck the baby. Right. No, the moral choice is so very obvious here. You can have another baby. No, but he's like, yeah, kill the wife.

Yes. Kill the wife. Yes. Cool. You can have another wife too. You guys always, we've had this happen a couple of times. And you always guys just always brush on through like, oh, no, of course you choose the one.

You're, okay, can I say this? I'm going to say something. I'm going to say something. If you get a new baby, Morgan, just be ready. It's not younger. Well, okay. I mean, it is younger.

A little bit, yeah. Not the way you're saying. But not chronologically. Yep, exactly. So you can't look for a new baby that doesn't have some of the stuff you didn't like about the old. Jesus Christ. This doctor kind of looks like John Fetterman a little bit. Doesn't he?

Doesn't he? Not like a ton, but enough where I just started then mentally referring to him as Dr. John Federman, MD. Okay. And I don't know, being like, hey, your baby and also your wife are hemorrhaging. Why is the baby hemorrhaging? What did you do to this baby? In a way where they were attached to each other and only one with the other. They're both attached to the same tank of blood.

All three of you had a stroke at the same time. I don't understand. It's Dr. John Federman. Yes. Yeah, right, right. So, but then there was also this moment where the doctor goes, he's running out and he's going to go save the baby but not the wife. And the guy says, is there nothing we can do? And the doctor says, all we can really do is hope.

Oh, shit. That's the title of the movie. Isn't it, though? Isn't it just? So then we cut to a bunch of gangsters showing up at a mansion in slow motion, variable slow motion. Yes. With a zip-block freezer bag full of money. Okay.

The glad bag full of... This is the thing... These are the things that a Jewish woman and only a Jewish woman could come up with, right? You think keeping the cash fresh is kind of... That is more semitic than Hanukkah, my friends. That's going to keep better. Just pop it in the fridge.

Because the props person brought the fake money and she said, well, no, that would spill all over. I got it. I was at the bag. Nathan grabbed the big two gowns. Not the one, look at me, not the one gallon bags. Oh, the two gallon bags. Yes, we have all.

There's underneath a variety of freezer bag that ever was. Or ever. All of the big spinny display. Got it. Yeah. I was at the bank the other day to try to get a new debit card. And there was a guy online in front of me who was actually doing cash deposits from Ziploc bags. I just get you know.

Like this is, I don't know what kind of. a business he was involved in. They did not want to accept his deposits at first, but he somehow was able to convince them. I'm not sure what was going on. What I will say is that in the first two minutes of this film, it is hard for me to overstate how jarring this all is, because we've already experienced an All Lives Matter manifesto, a very brief one, but unquestionably one, a man telling Dr. John Fetterman to save his baby at the expense of his wife.

And now a bunch of cars with Europlates on them rolling up to a function. That was the thing that I noticed. For summary, I don't know where. they shot this, but these are not American cars with American plates. They have Europlates on them. No, this guy, so much of this movie was, what else can I write off, right? Yes, yes, yes. Okay, I think this director, this is my theory.

The director has one rich friend, and that rich friend did something terrible that the director, like, walked in on. Okay. So, like, they get to use, you know, the mansion in Tuscany and the, you know, the Corvette later and the... Okay. We'll send you to Japan. Yeah, right, a trip to Japan. Yeah. All right.

And then we get the credits where they were just determined to use every single effect that DaVinci has. God. Just drag and drop in order in some points. You can see them dropping each Da Vinci effect in turn. Yeah, I normally am like an advocate for opening credits in movies. I feel that they are somewhat of a lost art. This film made me fundamentally rethink. Right.

Yes. If it can be this bad. Yeah. Is it worth saving? They seem to be pretending that this this movie is based on like a known comic book series that of course we all know about it's not. They just used Da Vinci in a row with all the effects. Yeah. Yep.

And then so then we cut to like it says one year earlier on the screen. It's written in tiny little letters like a fucking watermark down at the bedroom. And I'm like one year earlier than what? Were you trying to sneak that in? in case we were going to like call you on it or something. I guess. But it's one year earlier, but the baby that was being saved is like a kid that's like 11 years old now.

Right. We are in school. Yes. With her. And we are sort of seeing what a day in this girl's life looks like, I guess. Although, again, it's very difficult to understand that that's what's going on because we don't establish her first.

No. We establish these cheerleader kids instead. And I will say my note here was like, enjoy these child actors well, they last because they are the best actors in this movie. Yeah, I'm not joking. Young Tiffany, yeah, she was awesome. She's great. Yep, she was fantastic. And there's, yeah, we introduced this character, Tiffany that'll just be there to be like nasty to everybody early in the movie, which would play better if she wasn't, you know, the primary black woman.

It's Tiffany. Yes. It's Tiffany. Thank you so much. Because I was like, why are we not talking about the fact that this character never fucking comes back? You didn't put two and two together on that. It took me a little bit too, to be fair. Just now.

If people are watching at home, you can see the light in my eyes go on as I realize that character will matter later in the movie. Okay. But so yeah, but then we walk by the cheerleaders and we follow this redheaded girl and a bunch of kids see her and they're like, oh, look, it's the Jewish girl. Let's go pick on her for being the Jewish girl, right? Okay. Now look, I love nothing more than when Jews write anti-Semitism who haven't experienced.

experienced anti-Semitism, right? Because what these anti-Semitic bullies will say is, she's probably going to go celebrate Hanuk. That is, that was when I locked the fuck in. I was like, now, this is going to be a great movie. Crazy nights instead of one Christmas, just fucking stupid. They take her backpack and they're like,

where's your Yamika? This is a Jewish backpack or something. Not the Jewish. Is it full of? Checks notes. Lodkas? So, but they take her backpack and they're messing with her. But then she pushes one of the boys with her super strength. That's right.

And everybody runs off. But we see in the background that another kid is filming it with his cell phone. That phone's going to be important. It's going to be super important. It's going to matter. The funniest line that'll ever happen in a movie, right? Which happens in this next scene because it's like it's like the child parole hearing where they're going to expel her for getting bullied.

Oh, right. Yeah, it's like the principal and like the rest of the parole board at the school. Yes, right. The principal's lawyer is there or something. Yeah. And this again, I think speaks to your point, Eli, just about like how this is a movie largely about anti-Semitism who doesn't understand how actual anti-Semitism works. Who never had any concept of, I honestly, it feels like a movie. If I didn't know that this actor is Jewish, I would say this is a movie about anti-Semitism written by Christian. Because that's what it feels like, right? It feels like someone read about anti-Semitism on Google Translings. Yeah. And of course, during the parole hearing, they're going like, you know, we try to be nice and let you people into our school. But, you know, you push kids with your super Jew powers and shit.

It's just, this is not a conversation that has ever happened. No, it's insane. And it kind of, it's like, it's sort of like bizarre a world, God's not dead. Is it two or three? in the school. That was what it It reminded me of the disciplinary hearings for the teacher and God's not dead too. Okay. Yeah, yeah. But you remember when

it was Obama, I think, who had to use the National Guard to get Jewish people into a school in Alabama recently? Yeah, yeah. So, but then, all right, then this kid shows up. This is young Bernard. He shows up and he's got the cell phone. He's the kid that was filming

earlier. So he's got all of the evidence of what really happened. And he brings the phone up to this guy. And then the movie remembers mid-scene that cell phones wouldn't have existed or smartphones wouldn't have existed back then. So the kid says to the dad, it's called a cell phone. My dad invented it. Just now. I have fun. It's on the internet. My dad invented the iPhone 14 or whatever. He jumped ahead a couple of generations, but he invented it. So this is Bernard. He is really the Gretchen weaners of this film in that way. You know, my father.

the inventor of cell phones would not appreciate what it is that you are doing stuff trying to make cell phones happen but my father would really not appreciate what you are doing to this poor innocent Jewish girl in the school. Right, he invented his cell phone technology so this wouldn't happen, yeah.

Okay, question, do you all think that her dad was Guy Fieri for a while? I did for at least a minute, yes. I was like, Guy Fierry is in this movie. That's... I'm so glad you asked that because at this point, I was watching this next to my wife, and my wife turned to me and said,

is that actually Guy Fierry? And so we had to pause the movie to have a 10-minute marriage-destroying fight about, tell me the universe in which Guy Fieri is in operation. Oh, your dad invented the cell phone? Well, I invented donkey sauce. So, yeah. So, okay, then we cut to 10 years later.

And again, this movie's really long, and we're not going to try not to go over, but there's no scenes that I can cut, because they're all fucking goals. This is the scene where now they're older, they're in college, and older Tiffany doesn't want to learn about the Holocaust. She wants to learn about African tragedies because she's black. That's right. That's right.

What it's framing up here, I don't know what this class is supposed to be about. They don't really establish it. But the idea is that, well, there are two things that you could do. Option number one is that we talk about sort of various tragedies and, and, you know, humanitarian disasters over the years and we keep a wide focus, or we should focus in specifically on the ones in Africa, but not the slave trade, really? We need to, that this is Tiffany's argument, actually. Yeah.

And it goes back to like the all lives matter of it all, which is, well, sure, slavery was bad, but did you hear about what they got up to in Africa, what the Africans were getting up to in Africa. I think that's what this is. Interesting, yeah. I don't think she's talking about, like, the other humanitarian disasters, like the Belgian Congo and, you know,

that sort of thing. I don't think that's... I could be wrong. It also doesn't really bear talking about it too much because this movie is nonsense. And none of this will ever fucking matter in any way. No. There's no way that you can tie this to anything that ever happens in the film again. All it sets up is hope arguing back

with Tiffany being like, well, I want to talk about the Holocaust, and I'm pretty sure that beats slavery. They're on the Holocaust. You guys, fuck you, Annie Semites. They're on the Holocaust unit in history class. You don't just stand up and go. I want to talk about slavery, you fucking liberal cucks.

You know what, whatever. Let's make space in the fucking protect this thing. Fuck off. We're doing the house now. That's fair if that's what was happening. But then the movie... That was that. The movie mathematically accidentally says that the Holocaust was like bigger than slavery.

It does. It does. Like time was. Fucking nuts. Yeah. Also, it took me a second here to clock that the lady who's standing up to be like, actually, we need to talk about the Holocaust and not the horrors of Africa is hope. That is the girl from before the backpack.

The reason it's very hard to tell is that the little subtype. let us know that it's been 10 years since the previous events, which means that this woman would need to be like 21, 22 years old. Yes. And she is not. Yeah, she's my. She is 55. So, okay. So then, okay, we cut to the present day, no idea where that is on the fucking timeline.

And Hope is hanging out with her best friend Bernard, who is gay and he's going to a bachelor party and needs him, her to pick him up from it later, right? This is Bernard whose dad had invented cell phones, of course. Yes. This is the guy who's dad invented cell phones. and cell phones. Yes, thank you. So, okay, so he goes to meet some dude and we watch basically the setup to amateur porn for a little while. Looks like it too. Yeah, it's lit like it. Well, I don't know. I think they'd like most, most porn lights better than this. But then it turns out this is all a setup and a bunch of guys you're going to gang rape him. Okay. Yes, Eli,

please. Please take this away from me. Okay. But here's the fucking amazing thing. First of all, What's very funny is like in a movie that was written, in a poorly written movie that had not achieved the mastery of bad writing than in this movie, it would be a gay bashing, right? It would be like, oh, and these frat boys set him up to beat him up. But because Hope is so removed from reality, she's like, I bet they would all be waiting inside to have sex with him. And he's not like, no, I don't want to have sex with you guys. he's like, oh, I did not prepare adequate. 11 dicks. Yes.

I need to go to the bathroom for a minute. Yeah. It's like when someone brings their kids to a non-kid event. You're just like, I mean, yeah, sure. Sure. Hi. Hi. Hello.

Yeah, my note at this point was, has anybody who worked on this movie ever met a gay person? Clearly not. I'd be surprised. No. Not that they're aware of. Yeah. But then she hears the scream from the parking lot, right? And so it's time for her to superhero.

But she, like, smiles at that point. She hears this scream. And she's like, I've got this. And I'm like, okay, but you're smiling at your friend getting gang raped at this point. They're probably gang raping my friend. This is a good chance to use my Jew powers. Yes, exactly. And then, okay, I know I have said lazy as possible fight choreagra before.

I apologize for having deployed that too soon. Yeah. Because what they do in this movie is she just shuts off the lights and we hear, Posh, wow, psh, yeah, the choreography is N slash A

like the rotten D. Yeah. We owe an apology to Batman's Capal based on this film. Yeah.

The noises are funny, it's like light bulb smashing and like, it's so silly. Yeah. Yep. So, okay.

So now she's driving Bernard home, his purity's still intact. Thank God. This is where we learn that she can't remember what happens when her superhero

powers kick in. And also, she killed. every one of those rapists. He killed them all. And he's like, but again, the sloppy writing in this movie is so brilliant, right? Because like, oh, that would be the part of the movie.

How do they? He's like, no, it's okay. It's a hotel. Hotel. Public. I'll just erase all the footage from my lab. From my laboratory, yes. Where I can remotely hack into any hotel. Public. Public. Public. Public.

Public. He does say public. My dad also invented hacking. Yeah. Also invented public. Hotel. Yep. camera so okay so then we cut to a news reporter this is tiffany she was the cheerleader girl from before and the girl who didn't want to talk about the holocaust she's now a news reporter and she's reporting on the murders at the hotel right we just introduce her very quickly basically five dead people we don't know anything about it do you back to you ted if you did it you have to

tell me i'm the news i don't think i do tiffany nope no back to weather okay So then we get this quick scene of hope getting home. She lives with her dad. This is where I finally realized that they're trying to play this 47-year-old woman as like 22 or whatever. Oh, yeah. I think she's more like in her 50s. I mean, who can say really. Yeah, I'm being kind.

Yeah, you know. Yeah, fair. Never last a lady, hooray. Yeah, exactly. That's right. So, but dad notices her black eye and he's like, have you been out superheroing with your superpowers? And she says, oh, maybe a little bit. So, okay.

So now it's time to end. introduce our bad guys. And we do it in the weirdest possible way. We see this guy. He's shirtless. He's covered in tattoos. He's covered in blood. He's in the back of a trailer. And the main bad guy opens the trailer up and he says, hey, man, y'all back there covered in blood and shit. He's like, yep, sure am. He's like, okay, we will never make this make sense. No, and the blood covered guy is not the main villain. No. He's not even a particularly important villain. This is so jarring. because again, just like with how movies are supposed to work, if you set up this much establishment for a character,

you are then expecting like, oh, this is the character, this is the villain, the antagonist, whose journey I will be following over the remainder of this film. And that is not the case at all. No, this guy's like the number four in a gang at best. Right. Yeah. I think what happens is they wanted to do like a big bloody thing,

guy with no shirt blood all over him. and the main bad guy was like, I'm not doing shirt off. I'm 65 years old. This guy who's like, I'm in really good shape and I have tattooed. I mean, he's fucking Jack. He's worth watching.

If you cover me the main villain in blood, people are just going to think I have that thing where old guys bleed occasionally. Shut up. So, okay, so then we have him flashback to like he just assassinated a bunch of people. And then he hears this baby crying. And he opens the door and he comforts the baby. I so expect. expected him to just shoot the baby.

He should have him shoot the baby. Have him shoot the baby. It's like this is, you know, you talk about in like film making or story writing in general, you got your Save the Cat moment, right? And the flip side of Save the Cat is kick the puppy. Shoot the baby. This is where you have him kick the puppy or shoot the baby. Exactly.

Yes, exactly. Right. But he's like, fuck, killed somebody with a baby. I have to deal with this. And I was like, oh, is this? It's going to be like a baby comedy now? Yeah. Three gay members of a baby.

Men's situation. But no, we never see the baby again. So then, okay, so then we watch a cockroach scurry away in this director's apartment. We see the guy with the tats waking up from nightmares or something and he thinks about shooting himself in the head, right? And he's considering the best angle for like way too long for it not to be comedy now. I wrote it as a joke. I wrote it as a joke.

And then I sadly deleted it because he literally does like a, and then me, me, me, me, me. That would be stupid. Back of that. He hits the rule of threes with the goddamn pistol to his own head. Crazy. He does. But then somebody calls him and he's like, I'll pick you up in 20 minutes.

He says, I'll be down in 10. And I'm like, well, that doesn't match up at all. You'll be waiting outside for him. I heard you say, just come in 20 because it's weird otherwise. I'll be outside at 5. Now, see, okay. So then, okay. Early is late.

Late is on time. We get this, we get another one of these, how the fuck did they have this much money kind of a movie or moments for a movie like this, right? Because we cut to him meeting with a bunch of gangsters, like the main bad guys are meeting with a bunch of gangster bad guys, or biker gangster bad guys rather, and they're giving them the Ziploc bag full of money for some deal. Same Ziploc bag full of money. Yeah.

And again, movie rules, it's like, oh, this is like breaking bad. And what we're going to have from here on out is going to be turf warfare. between these two rival gangs. Yes. Absolutely. We will never see the bikers again. No, we will not. Or Malcolm, keep in mind that again, we get another red herring bad guy.

So Malcolm, who is not our main bad guy. No, Malcolm is our main bad guy. There's a guy who looks like he's dressed as Malcolm X, and that's why you're confused. There's the hat guy. He looks like Malcolm, but that's a different guy. Hat guy is Malcolm's hype man. And he's the one who does the talking in this scene. Right. No, he pretends to be the.

boss. Yes. And so we get another red herring bad guy. I think all the movie was doing is trying to explain like, these are drug dealers, but the movie's very confused about like the logistics of drug transactions, which is not that confusing. There's one line where it's like, we had a deal.

Take the money and the drugs. And everybody's like, wait, no, because that can't be the deal. Did you guys get fucking Donald ducts or some shit over here. Wait till we get home with no drugs and money. You know they were driving. They're halfway home on the drive.

Shit, no, guys, they gave off them a car. Why didn't they say anything? When I was doing that. The real mechanical purpose of all of this seems to be to establish Malcolm, actually. Yeah, he's the big bad. He's the big bad. He looks like Brian Tyree Henry.

except 20 years older if Brian Tyree Henry couldn't act and this is Philip Penza who is the director, co-writer and executive producer of the film. He has 1.8 million followers

on Instagram. He is a prolific independent filmmaker. The lowest rated movie in Pence's filmography is something called water, which is about a backyard pool in Phoenix that makes you cheat on your wife. I thought that was pretty cool.

In a month, on October 17, he's going to be appearing an event in Palm Springs called Movie Live, where Hollywood, off the screen and onto the stage alongside fellow Pensaverse members Lorenzo Lammis and Terrell Matheny

who's the guy who plays the enforcer in this movie and the headliner of this event Eric fucking Roberts ER! Amazing! Nice. Oh, Eric Roberts is in a bunch of this guy's movies, by the way. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, he's in a bunch of everybody. Yeah, it's, yeah. Okay, so that guy

got caught cheating and he told his wife like, babe, no, the pool, the magic water in that Phoenix pool is real. I'm actually doing it documentary about it. I'm making a movie. You're going to understand later when you see the movie. So, okay, so then we cut to this, this plotline makes no sense and it has nothing to do with anything.

We cut to this gangster that we haven't met, offering a scoop to the reporter lady if she can get him if I can witness protection and immunity. And I thought this was Malcolm for a second because he looks the same. Like he's dressed the same, but he sounds different. I was like, oh, I guess that's not him. No, he has, but he has the information you need to put Malcolm away forever. And I'm at this point written, who the fuck is Malcolm?

Who is this guy? Yeah, right, right. Who is anybody? Yeah. And so he's asking what appears to be a local news reporter for witness protection and immunity. Yes, I guess she's an FBI asset. Right. Tiffany?

Well, we find out that yes, which is insane. But at this moment, I was like, what the fuck is happening? And then she's like, no, yeah, I got you. And she calls her local TV station boss and is like, can we do immunity and witness protection? for somebody. And he's like, no, we're the fucking news. What are you fucking talking about? Why would you ask me that? That's like asking me to make tofu taste better. I can't do that. I'm your boss. Do it or I walk. Yeah. Yes. We have

17 people that watch our show. 17. She says, yeah, no, if you don't do this, I quit. And he goes, okay, well, then I guess I'll be the FBI then. All right. So, okay. So, me, well, then we cut to like Malcolm getting a visit from the FBI. They want to search his airplane hanger. A beautiful FBI agent. A beautiful... This man is serving

gauge earrings. Yeah. The baby gauges. Yeah. He's got the gauges. The baby gauges. He's got an MCR cover band for sure. He's beautiful. It's another wonderful example of tremendous miscasting that is so compelling. This guy is way too young to be the lead of an FBI

And certainly much too beautiful. Absolutely. So, yeah, he's like, we saw two dead bodies dragged into this property last night. And he's like, oh, I guess you'll have to search my hangar. And he's like, I bet nothing will come of this. And we'll just ignore this plotline forever now. And he's like, we sure the fuck will. Never matters.

Nope. Speaking of never matters. Then we get the scene where Bernard. The rest of the movie. Yeah, really. Yes. Oh, my God. So Bernard now has to take hope to the new house that he bought for them.

right he's just like she's blindfolded and he's like all right open your eyes and she takes off the blindfold she goes he goes this is our new house okay i actually as a joke as i'm seeing this unfold i was like okay he's gonna be like i bought us a buddy house he seriously bought a buddy house he bought them a buddy house yeah i was like okay eliz done this to me a few times we had to abandon a lot of financial arrangements he made a lot of property and see it's true the movie becomes a real estate tour video at this Yes. There are so many camera movements and the focal point of most of this scene is on the house itself. The characters are largely ancillary to look at these beautiful cabinets. Right. Well, yeah, clearly he said, hey, well, you know, if you let me use that rental property,

I'll get you a really nice video of all the cabinets. Right, right. Also, I don't know if anybody else noticed the sexy mama pillow on her new bed. I did. I did. That's fine. You know, put whatever you want in a pillow. but like if you're a, if you're a best friend buying a buddy house for your best friend,

don't, don't go hard in on the pillow stuff that maybe the one that says sexy mom, I just like let her pick that. You wouldn't like that? I'm not saying I wouldn't like it. I'm saying it's just, you know, let it happen. Let it come to you. I think Hope would like it specifically. She loved it.

She loved it. She nailed it actually. So there's also a great moment where he's like, let me show you my laboratory because he pronounces it like that. And she's like, I don't want to see it. And he's like, is that because we couldn't afford to put a laboratory here? She's like, no, I just don't want to. I don't want to see it.

Let's look at the pool. I don't want to. I don't want to. So, okay. So then we cut to Tiffany, the reporter. She's going to see her boss. Agent Starks is there. She's asking about the witness protection program.

And I only, we're only including the scene so that we can, I can tell you this amazing scene. Agent Starks walks in there. He looks at Tiffany. He goes, top of your class at Harvard. Not to mention. Heath, Heath, let me do the line. He goes, top of your class at Harvard, not to mention the Pulitzer Prize last year.

I'm going to name things about you now. Harvard, the Victorian Pulitzer Prize. You know it called Fusion Nobel. Oscar. Creator of the universe. We also, there's a line in here from Tiffany's boss where he says, I'm putting the company and my ass on the line for you and this deal. What company and what deal?

What is you talking about? The witness protection and the immunity for the gangst. I guess the FBI is like, okay, now you arrest Malcolm and she's like, all right. I guess I'll have to arrest Malcolm. If this community deal doesn't work out, we're going to shut down LMJT news. You have to stake the news company as collateral for the FBI investigation. Now we're in the FBI's pocket. We're fucked.

Yeah, right. It's okay. So meanwhile, Malcolm is sitting in his car. There's this great moment where, like, they have red interior lights in the car, which looks really cool when you're like zoomed in on the car. But then they'll like back away from it. And you're like, oh, that looks ridiculous. Right. And it looks like something that high schoolers go to prom in. This is, by the way, a real Rolls Royce. Again, to the point of this movie sparing no expense. Yeah, absolutely. So this is where we also meet his wife, Rachel. I will never know who she is for the next hour and 10 minutes. of the movie. I don't even... They'll just barely maybe explain some role for at the end. The relationship never makes any fucking sense.

But yeah, they have a flashback where they're fucking and he's... She's a capped woman is what we understand here. Okay, but they don't fuck. They don't fuck. No, they don't. I had the same note, Eli.

Okay. There's this crazy moment of insight into consent here, which is so bizarre, right? This is such a bizarre movie. But she's like shaking. He's like, are you nervous? And she's like, yeah. And like, usually, even in standard movies, right?

they fuck anyways and then she feels better but he's like all right well if you're shaking with nervousness I don't think now is a good time for us to be intimate and then he goes and he's not a lazy boy and I was like okay points for Malcolm I'm gonna sit on the other side of the room and let's talk about our first sexual experience together clothes we'll want this so you seem like you're not having a good time right now I'm gonna eat a guy in like two days have you heard of better help but he's gonna put her in high hiding. That's very important to the rest of the movie. And then we cut to Malcolm at like a gangster party or during like at a dinner. And this is where Rock comes in. Now Rock is the, he's the drug salesman of the month. So he gets the employee of the month parking at the drug dealer.

Salesman of the month for the drug dealers. I don't think drug cartels really need to have that title, nor would like everybody's the same. You just feel like, hey, drugs. And people are on the fucking And people are like, yes, I will buy them again. I would love to be the salesman of the munch for my cartel. The fuck, they bring you in and they're like, on the wall, you can see. I also. And I know we're supposed to be going,

we're speeding through this and shit. But also there's this great moment where Craig the chemist comes in and he's got this whole like, oh, we're doing suits and ties. Fuck, somebody should have told me we were doing. I'm a t-shirts and, oh, fuck. I look stupid. I look stupid. Craig has the most insane hair I have ever seen.

seen on a human being. Yeah, I'm really, so here's another aspect of video, which is that Craig is a weird looking bald man, so I can't wait for the comments to say, oh, is that Eli? Yes. But no, though, that's the thing. No. Like, you are a normal

looking bald guy. Thank you. He is not at all. Venmo coming right at you. Josh, let's go. And he has styled his hair. That's fine. Go ahead. Heath, you are a fantastic looking ball guy. If you were all the attractive of our other show,

CITES I'm sending you an image of all the host of CITI. One of them's really sick, so don't do him. Okay. But the chemist guy has a new drug, right? And he's like, man, just a couple of drops of this. Urine colored liquid is all it'll take. Right. And they're like, damn, call me Huey Lewis in the news the way I be wanting one of them. So they're like rock the drug dealer of the month. Why don't you take a couple of drops of this? And he's like, I don't want to. And they're like, Take it anyway. And he starts tweaking. And then he gets so paranoid that he just like pulls his pistol out and points it at Malcolm.

And so they kill him. Right. Well, yeah, right. They put a bag over his head. Craig the chemist kind of helps out with a very like, I'm on you guys's side. Hey, hey, we're murdering guests. And I just want to be clear that I'm a big helper.

You could just, I'm the murderer. I'm a murderer. Is this good? It's a big part of this. Why did any of this? I don't know. Why would you make, yes. Hey, other guy, we should hang out afterwards.

We did that murder together. Remember when we murdered equal, equal amounts? I pulled the bag. I pulled the bag a little bit. So, okay. So Malcolm's wife is now at the library where she likes to hang out. We haven't mentioned yet that Hope is the librarian, right? So Hope forcibly introduces herself to Rachel.

And she, like, gives her like this weird unsolicited hug of like, you and I are friends in the movie now and Rachel's like, oh, are we? I, all right. I promise you this actress does this to real people on a regular basis. She walks up and she's like, I can tell you need a hug. Are we? Are we, okay.

Oh, longer? Okay, I was breaking. So what this movie needs obviously is an action beat. So now we cut to Hope and Bernard for some reason they're staking out Tiffany the reporter and they see somebody like following her.

So Bernard has to call 911, well, Tiffany has to go be a superhero real quick. Oh, yeah. And yet again, there is implied action that we don't see. Yep. Followed by a smash cut to the next scene. And the net effect of all of this is that it is almost impossible to know what is actually going on and when anything is going on. Right. Right.

Yeah. These guys in masks attack Tiffany in a parking garage. And mid beating her up, she turns the lights off a little bit. I guess she lets him get a few good licks in, though. We'll understand why later. It makes sense. Don't right. She's still pissed about the, about the fucking...

We were on the Holocaust. It's fucking great. It's crazy thing to stay. You can't change what the class is about, Tiffany. I just wanted to say to that when we were in college. Get her a little bit more. And then I'm going to go out. I also just want to say about that library.

It's not a library. I don't know what it is. I love that they have these bookshelves. I love that they were able to get like 20 to 30 copies of a few different books and put them up on the shelves next to each other. It's very funny. Did you see a second bookshelf? I saw one and I was like, oh, the bookshelves.

Maybe it was the library. Maybe it was just one. So, okay, so there are more books visible on our YouTube channel right now than there were in this library. Yeah. So anyway, so now Tiffany wakes up at the hospital. She's all beat up and she's handcuffed because apparently everybody there was dead when the cops got there except for.

her, so she's the only suspect. So the cops are like, we're going to convict you for murder of six guys in a parking car. And we get a moment of the crazy libertarian politics, but like, again, nothing will fit with other stuff.

Cops says that, and she's like, oh, am I being detained? And I'm like, you're only, you know, you're a suspect, but you're our only suspect actually. And she's like, okay, but am I being detained? The cop's like, fuck. Oh, she got a match. There's also this great moment where he's explaining

how the people died and he says of one guy, his head was turned completely around. So back to normal? Yeah, that's, right, is that 360 or 180? We were like, that guy's doing. How did you know? We thought that guy was totally normal and then we took his shirt down and it was all right.

He was twisted and then twisted back around. We let go and it went, whee-w-w-ha-w. And then we kind of had to wait for it to settle. Yeah, because then it went the other way again. Go a little through far. Yeah. So, yeah. So.

Yeah. Just let it settle. Let it settle. This is weird. Don't touch it. Don't touch it. But she swears that she didn't turn anybody's head completely around. And he's like, well, somebody didn't.

And it wasn't fucking me. Right. So it must be you. Yeah, you're the only only one there. All right. Well, it seems like an action scene might break out at any hour now. So we need a quick break to prepare. But we're back in a flash with even more of Operation Hope.

Now get him out of here and clean this mess up. You got it, boss. Hey, Craig, right? Yeah. Hi. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So you're the drug scientist? Yes, I am.

I'm on the sort of. Well, yeah, yeah, yeah. Look, I don't want to make things. awkward, but I feel like you kind of overstepped back there when we were doing the thing. I did? Yeah. I don't really make a big deal about it, but it's just the boss did like the murder him cue. We all saw that.

And I wrapped the bag around his head. And then you were like right up in there, like right in. Yeah. What would you even do? I was helping. I was helping smother the drug. No, no, you weren't not helping. Honestly, it was like harder to do with someone else also grabbing the plastic bag.

Oh, I'm so sorry. I just thought I was like reading the room. No, nobody else in the room joined in. Nobody else joined in. Exactly. Thank you. So, Craig, how about this? I'll do the murder stuff and you cook drugs.

Absolutely. And again, I'm really sorry. Do you want to try the drugs that I made? No, man. They seem bad. Yeah, no, I do not think people are going to. like that stuff. You know, me neither? And then I was thinking, maybe

biscuits and gravy without the biscuits. It's so good without the biscuits. Hey, guys. What's you doing? You ready to finish the record? Yeah, yeah, that should do it. Good job, guys. But here you go. Nice. Awesome. Wait a second. Why is Josh giving you guys money? Oh, we're his yes, man.

Honestly, when you love the work, don't feel the work, you know? How can you afford that, Josh? Oh, it's easy, Noah. I use rocket money. What's rocket money? This is like a whole point thing. It involves a Zoom now.

It's actually really important to me. Rocket money is a personal finance app that helps find and cancel unwanted subscriptions, monitors your spending, and helps lower your bills so you can grow your savings. Well, that sounds great. It is. I started using Rocket Money to monitor my savings when they became a sponsor. Rocket Money helps me put my savings on autopilot while meeting my goals. And that's why I, Eli Bosnick, personally endorse Rocket Money.

All right, guys, I'm sold. Where do I sign up? Let Rocket Money help you reach your financial goals faster. Join at RocketMoney.com slash awful movies. That's rocketmoney.com slash awful movies. Rocketmoney.com slash awful movies. You did so good. I already paid you for the hour, buddy. I know.

We'd start a new hour if you want. Don't PPV our guest team. I'm not. You are. I am. And we're back for more of this shit. We're going to rejoin the action with all the bad guys raising a glass to the henchmen that they lost a couple of scenes ago. Let's cheers to our fallen.

We murdered him, comrades. To a real one who we killed. A great salesman last month. Yes, right. Oh my God. There's a great moment here where he's sort of going around the room and he goes, Malcolm goes like, hey, what's your job? And one guy goes, murder. Okay.

Okay. This was a confusing moment. It felt like the movie, again, was confused about how drugs work and how selling even works. And you know when somebody's trying to pretend they know something? I'm talking about Eli, of course. And they're like, oh, yeah. Frank Borman. We were selling the drugs.

And so he goes around him. He's like, everybody name, I know what everybody's job is, but name the things that we all do in drugs. Malcolm's organizational structure rolls up to, I guess, three main departments, which is murderer, whatever is asked. Yeah. And Moneyman. Money man. Yeah. What does Money man do exactly?

That's the organizational structure right there. Hey man, are you our accountant? Yeah, but but that guy said murder and so I felt like a count. I also get the zip lock bags. I have the two gowns. I get the glads to get them

and you usually have to go to Target to get those. You don't have those. But of course, Malcolm is mad that they don't have Tiffany's hands and tongue, right? That's what they were after. Right. Because he needed them like as a trophy,

I guess. Yeah, yeah, right. To send a message, I guess. Do you ever think there's fights? Because I know that happens. in the real world. Do you ever think when gangsters at like cartels and stuff when someone's like, bring me his tongue?

Do you think gangsters ever like, hey, look, you're the boss? Can I not? Can I just shoot him in the head? And that's enough? Can we time out on the, can we have an idea jar rule? Or how about we just, we cut the tongue off and you don't have to have it. Yeah, let's just do, let's just shoot him in the head. And then I'll say, I murdered that guy to death, just like you asked me to. And I don't have to sit there with pliers and sit.

scissors for 40 minutes and it slips out because it's still wet. The tongue doesn't dry instantly upon death. We're not doing another sensitivity training about tongue pliers. Well, and then I got to go, I got to go the whole fucking way back with the goddamn tongue in a bag. Yeah, and then I've got a fucking tongue in my fucking dashboard. And what are you, you look at it for two seconds. I get here with the tongue and you go good. And honestly, you don't even know it's her tongue.

I could bring you any tongue. I can bring any tongue. Why are they? Listen, you can work somewhere else if you want. This is the right to work stage. Why are they so concerned with Tiffany specifically? I understand that we know that she is an FBI asset, but how would they know that? They were watching the movie, right?

Like over and over and you have to be like, oh, they must be watching this movie. I guess they are. I guess they're watching. Yeah. Okay. So now he's going to pretend like he forgives the head of the murder department for his failure. Yeah. He's doing the like boss guy very calmly walking behind somebody.

bald Italian man, by the way. This is not going to work out well for you. And then he starts talking about the etymology of vigilante. And if they're doing a slow speech and etymology, you're done. You're about to get rid. You might as well try to get a running start. If that ever happens to me, I'm going to ruin it while he starts. I'm going to be like, oh, you're about to murder me.

You're about to murder me. Call me. I know you're going to be vigilant. It comes from Latin. No, you don't care about the definitions of words. This is a murder lead up. I got me before you can get me. What a delicious bowl of oranges, that is.

Wow. I'm biting it a bunch, so it's harder to get. Still going to eat it. So, yeah, so he stabs him a bunch of times. And then he's like, that wasn't evil enough. So he takes a giant bite out of his neck. What, wait, like, what is this? Again, one of many points of this movie where I just was yelling at my screen,

What is happening? Why are we here? He's also a cannibal. It's just like and cannibal at the residence. People are like, oh, why not? Fuck. Okay. So he makes everybody leave.

No one's going to the next dinner. He calls right. No, that's two in a row. Yeah. I wanted to see him keep eating. Everybody's just like, okay, bread and buttercores is next. Yeah, too. On the tasting news.

So, yeah. So he says there and he continues to eat his meat. And then he flashes back to his childhood trauma of watching his mom get killed through the window. This will never come back up. Or manner, unless you're interested in the prequel, which this director also made. I am. And we are. And then he just breaks down emotionally.

But he gets it together. He pulls it together. And then we get like a different news reporter reporting about Tiffany's attack. This is, this was so funny. Hey, everybody. It's Craig. I'm not fucking just wanted to say from ABC News and I fucking love Tiffany

and she's the best. She won the Pulitzer. I know we said that earlier. But he goes, and he goes, I also worked on the Pulitzer Prize winning story, by the way. Just so you know. She tends to get a lot of the credit.

She's the, she's the, she's the black one. No. No, it's just, I heard that when she was in college, she would like interrupt history units about the Holocaust so that she could make it about her.

And I just want to say, that's not cool, but she's, pretty cool. I was at my class at my school. It was Trinity College. It depends on the testing. Tucker Carlson was there too. Oh yeah, but so and then we back away from the news and it's Bernard and Hope watching this together and he keeps looking over and you're going,

you're such a superhero, superhero, so that we know what category of movie we're watching. I love, I love Bernard and I wish there were more Bernard's in superhero movies, right? Because everybody finds out that you're Spider-Man and then instantly is like, what are we going to do about Rhino? I want one guy in every super movie to be like, what? Guys. This fucking rule.

Just like, small, like technical foibles that I find delightful in movies like this, one of them is bad color grading. There's quite a bit of it in this movie. This shot features some of the worst color grading in the entire film because it's like a shot, reverse shot between Hope and Bernard. When it's on Bernard, the color grading's okay. When it's on Hope, she appears completely yellow, like jaundiced type yellow. And I'm like, oh, I guess she's just facing liver failure now. And it's time for her to go to the hospital. So, and they also have to establish to see, she has murder amnesia, right? Whenever she uses her power,

she doesn't know what happens, right? And then there's another one of those weird, what are the politics here moments where he goes, look, I don't believe. capital punishment. But for those guys that were attacking Tiffany, plus it's cheaper than sending them to prison. Yeah. Okay. That's because you don't have a Jewish mother.

When I was eight years old, I asked mom, do we believe in hell? And she said, no. And then I said, what about Hitler? And she said, he's in hell. Because that's how Jewish women talk about politics. I can't tell you how recognizable this sentence. was to me. I was just like, yep. And you, you can simulate

this with any Jewish woman over the age of 40 in your life. Right now. No, but you should like murder Charlie Kirk if you're a vigil. And, you know, fiscally responsible. So like, say, yeah, of course. So, okay, so, but then fucking Hope visits Tiffany at the

hospital and they have that whole, like, she's still mad about the Holocaust module and history class thing. Right. This is also where we finally put the connective tissue together that Tiffany was the cheerleader girl from the beginning of the movie. I mean, unless you're me in which case, I literally put it together at the beginning of this podcast. I don't blame you. Genuinely, I do not blame you for not being able to put it together because this movie is very confusing.

Well, and the other thing, too, is that she says at this point, she's like, you know, you always bullied me in school. And that's not what we saw, right? We saw the Tiffany character being mean to people. And then we saw people bullying Hope, but we didn't see Tiffany bullying Hope, like any competent fucking film, right? Right. Little Girl Tiffany was just kind of like self-absorbed and thought she was hot shit and enjoyed being a cheerleader. We also learned that Tiffany and her, you know, popular girls' clique of cheerleaders bullied Hope in college and grad school. And grad school.

As well as middle school and high school. So like this whole group of people all had very similar. ambitions that's kind of just like you're right right but the idea of bullies at grad school I wanted to see a little bit like if that's funny as fuck and I showed up and heckled her thesis well this is poorly sore I feel like it's important that's not what Goethe meant to go back for a moment to the scene where they're in college and note something that we didn't note before which is that there are at one point the professor well, first of all, the bell rings.

Yes. At the college class. There's a quiz on Tuesday and dissertations are due at the end of the month. Dissertations. You're springing those on us, huh? And so like, fuck, I'm going to have to cram for my dissertation. It just seems that this, like many other things,

comes from somebody who simply does not know what the thing is or how it works, but does their best to sort of slot in the information that they do know. Yeah, so, but Tiffany is like, all right, or sorry, Hope is like, I forgive you for bullying me in grad school. After you get out of the hospital, we'll have a coffee or something, right? So Jewish. We're going to have a full meal together now. So then, okay, then out of goddamn nowhere and for no reason that we'll ever come back in

the movie, Hope goes to Tokyo to find a karate master. Yes. And the best thing happens. Yes, the best. The best, the best, the best, the best, the best. Like, every one of us. Can we play the clip over and over again? But like, honestly, like, everyone watched, everybody involved in this fucking record.

Stop the movie at this point, stood up and spun around in a circle with joy like the children do. Oh, my God. Because you've got this guy. And this is a, this is a fat man. He's not like this. He's not like a sumo wrestler type build, but he's a big boy. And he is doing kip-ups, you know, he's doing his karate motions. And it shows the same shot of him kicking over and over and over and over again.

And he's a little too good for it not to be the funniest thing that's ever. Yeah, right. He's very good at it. Yes, he is. Because if he was a fat guy who was bad at it, there would be, it would be not as funny as it. It is like he's just perfectly graceful enough and perfectly athletic enough that you're like, yeah, you can also be a great athlete and be that fat. Right. And it's the funniest possible.

If Eli did a backflip right now. Right. It's perfect. And we're all like. Exactly. It's so much funnier than if I just fall down. Right. Because you're expecting it's right.

You're expecting him to be bad. It's a comedy of subversion of expectations. Absolutely. And he's really good. He's subvered our ass. Also, and I don't know if this is on purpose, but he's kind of shot from behind. So you think maybe he's, because she's in Japan, right, doing the, or in Asia, doing the correct. So you think he might be Asian.

And then at one point you get a full face shot and you realize he is Indian. Right. Which is Asian, but not Japanese. But not East Asian. But not. No, certainly not what you're. Yeah. Once again, subverted.

She goes, and then we see him and we've got her like in a VO trying to explain, why the fuck they're in Tokyo, right? And they're really in Tokyo because this guy wanted to write off a trip to Tokyo. Of course. It makes no sense in the movie. So she goes, why would I go to Japan? And Bernard says, you said it yourself, you're killing people with your superpowers. How does that relate to the question?

That doesn't answer the question at all. If you have magical superpowers, you go to Japan to check in with Japan about how you can control. regulatory authority for superheroes. It's like they're headquartered in Tokyo. Oh, okay. And he knows exactly where they are. You just need to find a waterfall with rocks.

That's right. Yep. That's what he says. He's like, well, look for a waterfall with rocks next to it. Oh, there's none of those in Japan. In Japan? If I see one, I'll know. In Japan, I assume she got off the plane.

Hey, where's the waterfall? With the rocks. The one with the rocks. Sorry. No, it's not the one right here. I know we're standing next to that, but it's not that one. And to the point, too, of how, like,

this is very clearly just something that is in the movie because it wanted to be a trip to Japan. They didn't even bring the equipment along. They just brought, like, some digital camera with a really shitty sensor. And you can tell because a lot of these shots are in the dark and the blacks are crushed to hell and back. You can't see anything.

Absolutely, yeah. No, this was on his phone. So eventually, though, she does find the waterfall with the rocks. And she walks up to a fat Kep up, Kai, and he just punches the shit out of her because he's her sense now. And she should have been guarding herself. Yeah. And we watch her do her little kattas.

This poor woman. Okay. She does the same kattas that my six-year-old does at his little dragon's karate class. I will say, clearly she doesn't know anything about martial arts. But credit where credit is due, this woman is fucking jacked. Like, she is. Oh, yeah, absolutely. Like to get her like that high at 53.

years old or whatever she was. Yeah. And I can kick and stretch. Most of this montage is her sitting very martial artsily, right? Yes. But we do get a little Kata montage where she gets very good at Kiki Punch Punch. Probably the worst training montage I've ever seen. There's a moment where she's like gently running her hand down ancient Japanese gravestones. I thought she was going to break out.

I thought she was going to be... Ah! That would have been funny. So yeah, so we get my best worse. We just get this insanely awful cata montage that makes no fucking sense. It never comes back. I like that she has yoga pants that have cargo pockets. Yeah.

Those are very practical. Very practical. In case you like break the old thing and you get to take the piece and hold on to get glue back later. Yeah, obviously. Yeah. So okay. So meanwhile, Bernard's back home trying his best to solve the mystery of her superpowers.

Right? So he checks his fucking magazine because no one involved in this apparently had a book. I don't know. Then we flash back to the Holocaust and I'm like, oh, I bet they'll do this with great sensitivity. Okay. Listen, they do not. They do not. Yeah.

So he's sciencing the science. He's got her blood. And then he like puts the blood into his computer. Color printer. He's like, there you go. He's like feeding it like a dot matrix print. You got to like turn it around because it's... Yeah.

Yeah. It puts the blood in and he's like, computer, figure out the blood for the movie. Yeah, this is happening in the present day. And over the course of this scene, he says, yeah, or okay, conservatively a dozen times each. Yeah. Maybe more.

And so the computer, apparently, as I experienced it, the computer shows him a flashback of like Dr. Mangala in the Holocaust. Is that what's happening here? So I think that's what's being shown. maybe not the computer that did it, but it was a weird order of things. And I was like, that's flashback is this. Yeah. That's a crazy response from the computer.

Yeah. But we see the Nazis testing the limits of this chick's superpowers because they're, they're giving her the experimental super soldier serum. And by the way, they're all doing the same German accents that we would do like if we suddenly had to. Yeah. Zatis through. Yeah. We see the,

yours is significantly better than their shot. We see the Nazi flag that somebody's kid had to draw. Yes. The drawn swastika. Holy, dude. In real life, a kid had to draw that. Like, that's something that happened. And a kid had that.

And like, somebody walked into the room, maybe. Like, that's a real thing. That's definitely what happened in real life. How's your swastika coming along, honey? It's a Celtic cross. No, it's not, though. So, yeah, but then we see Holocaust grannies being sent in to see, you know, the assistant to the regional Nazi and they shoot her in the back.

that's the end of the flashback. But before that, we learned that she is Mitt Child. Oh, yes. Oh, yeah. It's subtitled to let us know that I am Mitt Child means I am with child. I'm with child. Oh, because German, yeah, no. Yeah, yeah.

So I heard her say she's pregnant. I was like, okay, if an adamantium claw pops out of her belly right now, this is the fucking thing. I don't know what we're supposed to believe because the movie never comes back to it. Does she survive that gunshot? Does the baby survive? Right, right. Fetis professor.

Right, well, that's the thing, right? Was there like a little... I really just do mental kind of... Was there a fetus era where she was kicking ass? I can't fight this Nazi. So, okay, but Bernard checks and he says that her DNA doesn't have a double helix. No, it has a, she has a triple helix. So, that's one more.

Because that's, yeah, right, that's why she's 50% more powerful. That's... She's a pile of goo. Well, that's the thing. That's the only thing. thing this guy knew about DNA, right? That it had a double helix and he's like, what would be better than that?

Quadriple. No, don't go too far. That would be crazy. He might as well say she has one big gene. It's just the one. So yeah, but he checks her fucking midaclorians or whatever and finds out that her genes have been quote completely modified.

Oh, man. Yeah, completely. So he rushes to the library to tell her because she's apparently not in Japan anymore. That's when learn. And he runs up to her he's like, I have to tell you something. It's really important. I have to tell you right away. And she goes, okay, what is it? And he goes, tell me as much as you know about your grandmother. Yeah. He presents it, though, as the good news, bad news thing, but a little bit different. He's like, do you want the good news or the interesting news? And she's like, interesting, I guess. He's like, interesting. Cool. So you have superpowers from, I think,

the Nazis. The good news, you have superpowers from somebody. I don't know why I said nothing. It's crazy. You're a Zimiro. You have three DNA. The third strategy. She goes, what does that mean? He goes, it means you have no cancer cells.

And I'm like, oh, is that what that would do? I mean, I feel like hopefully you wouldn't have any cancer cells just in general. Most of the time, even with just two. That third helix, that's all cancer cells. It's not working out. There's also this amazing fucking moment where he's supposed to say you have no ailments. But he pronounces it elements. Yes.

Because somebody typed it wrong and he thought that was a medical word he didn't know. There's a lot of really delightful, like one take in your golden moments in the scene. Another one is when he says that Hope's grandma was in a concentration camp. And they kept it. Yes, and they keep that. Why would you keep that? No second takes. But the third trend of DNA can't be destroyed.

So that's good. Yeah. Yeah. She has a healing factor. Right. And she doesn't have herpes. And she doesn't have herpes. which is a big deal in this writer's mind.

Much unlike 70% of Americans. He does stop his movie dead to say, hey, actually a lot of people have herpes, okay? It's not just me. Do most people, does that 70% are most of those people talking about the sexually transmitted disease? No, it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter because they're all.

No, you're using, oh, it's just an all-acadigory. It's like the average length of a penis. Like if you look at the statistic, you have to measure from the buckle. So, so, okay, but then he says, you hate science. He says, hey, I just figure. out the secret to your superpowers and it comes from Nazi experimentation.

She's like, great, don't forget dinner at my dad's tonight. All right. Cool, man. I know you did your lab. We already knew this. I already have had known superpowers this whole time. It doesn't particularly matter what you did.

But cool. Dad's house tomorrow. Then we cut to her having coffee with Tiffany, but we cut there. We actually don't golf cut to our own. We got something different. Yes, we got, we get there eventually. we get there.

What'd you get? Yeah. Hey, okay. So, Hey, hey, yeah. What happened?

Would you like, would you like to hear my fucking experience? Yeah. Yeah. So, yeah. The scene cuts and they smash cut to what I was certain was, a transphobic ad on Tobe that I now had to watch.

Really? Because it cuts so fucking hard and so bizarrely that you're like, to people we've never met. It's like an ad, it's like an ad cutting into a YouTube video. Yes. Yes. Right.

in lighting that was unlike anything we'd seen in the movie to that point. Yeah. Yeah. But this was, it's just like a weird transphobic-ish moment. Like, I don't know. A mom being a dick about it. I don't know. Or is it pro-trane?

Yeah, the movie doesn't even know. I think they know. But like, it's something like that. And all it was was an establishing shot of a restaurant. Like, that's all that happened. Yes. Yes. But this of, like, there are a number of moments in this movie that.

remind me of the room. This is probably the one that reminds me of the room the most. Because to establish by having close shots on two people who you have not seen before and will never see again, having a conversation about something that is completely irrelevant to the plot, that is a fucking Tommy we sew ass move. It is. I was really, really expecting once they moved over to Tiffany and Hope for like hope to ask Tiffany. Anyway, how about your sex life? So yeah, but that was just to establish restaurant. So Tiffany and Hope are having coffee and they're getting to be friends. Matt Dillahunty is there to give them some lemon cake, apparently.

They have dialogue about the fact that they're having dialogue. And that's it. Yeah, that's it. It wasn't even an established. It's no. Basically the whole scene was just like trans person getting harassed in the bathroom at a restaurant because this is a restaurant. You know restaurants. And then people talking.

I think we're done. Do you remember your cousins? brother. He passed. So, then we cut to someone hate crimeed him in a restaurant. Because he was a, he was a trans. And I don't know why people don't like that.

Because it sells more dresses and women are spending more money. This is genuinely, Johnulogy. Genuinely, Eli, this is helping the entire movie. Yes. It really does get clicked now, doesn't it? All right. You just need to picture this movie and my mom's voice.

Yeah, right. The entire script is in your texts somewhere. Yeah, right. So now, so Hope and Bernard are having dinner with dad. And dad's like, it's time for me to show you something important. Right. So he goes and he gets the superhero box out of the garage. Now, Bernard is debating dad about whether or not the United States is a racist country

at the beginning of this scene for some reason. Is he? Is he? Seems to be. Because they're like, there's this thing about like 1492 and like, who did? what, when, why. And it seems to be starting on like this completely irrelevant political debate that then shifts into the main action, which of course is going to be.

Right. Do we be talking about Columbus when there was a holocaust that happened? Tiffany bursts up through the copy. I think we should be talking about slavery right now. So yeah. So but then, so dad bust out this box. And the first thing that we see is a picture of her mom in lingerie, right? In a fucking leather cat suit.

And then dad gives her the leather cat suit. And he's like, it's time for you to wear your mother's leather cats. So that passes this on to her when she's like 55 years old. Well, she, yeah. 21. 21, yeah. I believe that she is supposed to be roughly 24, 24. Yes.

Yeah, yeah. Well, she's been to grad school. So. Right. Wait. Heats face. Hey, Morgan. Hey, Morgan.

Hey, Morgan. Hey, Morgan. Can I get an instant replay? Hey, buddy. Can you spend like a. hour on YouTube tutorials so I can watch. I don't know who care about the audience and I know we're at most of the audience. No, this is for me.

Can I get like a burr-ro-ro-up? Also, it's like this is supposed to be the big reveal of like, oh, your mother, she was just like you. She was also doing death from above sword Judaism well wearing a cat suit. Yes, exactly. But the problem is the actor playing Hope's dead. is her age. Right. These actors are the same

fucking age. Yeah, exactly. And he's like, she tries on the cat suit and he looks at it. He's like, I sure miss your mom. And I'm like, that's creepy. And then Bernard is like, I also have a surprise for you. It's a Vroomie Corvette, you know?

And she's like, like she's on a fucking game show or something, right? A brand new car. Where are these people's money coming from? And how his dad's dad invented cell phone. No, I don't mean In the movie, I mean outside of great question. The rich guy did something terrible and got caught by the drive.

Great. I want him to do it in my house, please. I want this amount of money. All right. So we cut back to the- You can do it to me. We got back to the library. And we see, hope sees Rachel again, right?

And Rachel, that is Malcolm's kept wife, right? She explains to hope that she's pregnant, which is unusual at her age because she's 57. The actor is roughly. She's going to give birth to a 15. But again, it seems that this character is also supposed to be probably in her mid-late place. Yeah, exactly. I even wrote in my nose, how old are we pretending these women are? Yeah. But she doesn't want to be pregnant. And so they have this moment of like, you know, how do you feel about abortion? Well, you know what? I think there are good arguments on both sides. And we're like, what the fuck is going on here? I, here's the medium on abortion?

I think abortions, obviously everyone and I don't like Donald Trump, but I read a story. I'm going to need you to pick a side. I read a story on Facebook. This woman Yeah, no, right, and the cousin died are you pro? Do you remember your

aunt's sister? Yeah, she goes, not Larry's wife, Josh's dad. She would get an abortion every time she got braced. Do you think the babies went to And she died. It was crazy.

She was hemorrhaging. Yeah, right. She was between her and the fetus. So yeah. So yeah, but she says, ultimately she decides that she's okay with abortion. And Rachel says, I need you to take me across the border. And I'm like, wait, which border? That's legal in America.

Is she in the South? We are in the state of Arizona. This is clear from some of the establishing shots as well as the license plates. and Arizona, elective abortion is legal up until the point of fetal viability in the state of Arizona. Now, there are some states where it wouldn't be legal. Yeah, I'm in one of them, yeah. Yeah. But in the world of this movie, the only way to get an abortion is to go to Mexico.

Apparently, yeah. Or at least that's where you get the best ones, I guess. All right. Well, this movie has done the best plot fane it's ever going to do. So quick way you think that it might be about something. We're going to take a quick break. But first, let me give Act 3 the hard sell. Will the reporter character ever serve a purpose?

Will the scene with a bloody dude in the tractor trailer ever makes sense? Will the bad guy ever come up with a master plan for her to thwart? No. Just no, but stick around anyway for the what else can I write off conclusion of Operation Hope. They will be able to write off rollerblades. Oh, yeah. They will be allowed. Please, Rebecca, you have to take me to get an abortion.

Of course I will, because all lives matter, especially yours. Right. Excuse me, I've never been in this library before. Have you seen the books on trans rights? Oh, yeah, they're right of there. But be careful. Thank you. Oh, good.

They have 30 copies. Sorry, be careful? Yeah. I mean, you know how it is. I don't think I do know how it is. Anyways, let's go to Mexico. right now. We can take my electric car. Okay.

It's a cyber truck that says Protect the Sacred. What are the politics of this movie? It's a great question. It's a great question. So confusing. And we're back for still more of this shit. We're going to rejoin the action with yet another. Look how cold-blooded

Malcolm is seen. Okay. But at this point, he's just like a burden on the people around him. Yes. I'm constantly murdering somebody. You have one bad guy murders people establishing scene. Otherwise, it's people like, hey, did you hear I got transferred over to Malcolm?

Oh my God, do not go to a dinner. Don't go to a dinner. No matter what he says, don't go to a dinner. Okay. So, like, this is the scene where he's mad at the, at the landscaper guy for not getting this pool done quicker enough. Do you think that he wrote this scene like when his landscaping guy didn't get his pool done fast enough? This is his personal revenge I think he hired his landscaper to be in the movie

To passive-aggressively complain about it The thing is there's a non-zero chance of that, genuinely. Yeah, right. So yeah, so the landscaping guy shows a piece behind schedule And there's this great moment. Malcolm's basically just like got the knife up to stab him And Rachel comes in, his wife comes in. And he's like, oh, hey, honey, what's, what do you?

I had, I was going to cut a cake later. I was going to see if he was cake. not. And they have this big long talk about how she's going to go to the library. She'd like to go alone this time, though. And he's like, okay, well, just wear this tracking device. And she's like, I don't want to wear a tracking device. He's like, oh, no, it's turned off. Doesn't track you until you tell it to. Oh, like Google and Apple? Right. Yeah. Just like that. Yeah. Just exactly like that. Yeah.

I really love here how Malcolm tells her to have a good time at the library. And then two shots later, he tells her again to have a good time at the library. Just little bits like that make this movie such a joy to watch. And that actually happens like 16. We haven't brought it up yet, but it happens over and over again in this movie where you just like, you're like, oh, you guys didn't write dialogue for this scene. You thought you'd just wing it. Just wing it. Yeah.

Right. So yeah, so she leaves. And then he kills the landscaper guy. And then they have this added tacked on scene where he's. like micromanaging the disposal of the body? I laughed so hard at this. Tuck it. It was so good. Fold it over. No, fold.

Don't move my cheese. I do not move my cheese. It's ripping. It's ripping. It's your hand. It ripped it all the way through. You kill people all the time. We had plans this afternoon. Do you have to go home and change? 500 gallon zip locks. And this whole thing is shot

from above from a drone. That's the craziest thing of all of this is it's a full overhead drone The only one in the movie that's completely overhead. Yes. Yeah. So, okay. So then we cut to Rachel and Hope making a run for the border, right? And Rachel's like, I need to pull over for a minute. And she's like, why? And she's like, because the action sequence has to happen while we're pulled over.

We can't, we can't dent this car. We couldn't figure out how to do a car chase the car chase in the nice car we rented for the little. Right, right. So they pull over and then, of course, his guys show up to get Rachel. and we have the fight scene. Now, this is the first time we don't black out for the fight scene. Her stunt double might as well be black. Yeah. Right.

It is amazing the way that we're like, oh, well, you can see her ankles. See her ankles? She's kicking with those ankles. It might as well be the thick Indian guy doing her cry. Really? Honestly, yes. I wish. I would have been fucking wish.

Oh, my God. In that suit, yeah. Oh, absolutely. But yeah, but she kills a bunch of guys to death. Right. But this triggers Rachel. Rachel has had to witness a whole lot of violence by virtue of being married to a mobster. And so she's like, I can't do this. I'm sorry. I'm too freaked out. Well, it's actually even weirder than that because it turns out one of the henchmen who's there to get her, she's having a secret affair with.

Right. We have not, it's not, this isn't something that we forgot to tell you about listener. Sorry. Did you guys not watch the pre-wreck movie that had this in it? Yeah. Yeah. We didn't read the silly. of this fucking movie. So we find that out when she karate punches him.

So Hope, not Hope, sorry. Rachel is totally fine with Hope karate punching all the bad guys. Then she karate punches one henchman in particular. Her secret boyfriend. And Hope is like, and Rachel's like, too far. Yes. Yeah, no, that's the one I liked. And she's like, well, you know, he wasn't a mask trying to kidnap you.

You maybe could have warned me, you know. Maybe he give him a bell. There's also the question. One of them, I can't remember. I think it's Rachel. says, how did you find me? How did you think? Right.

Was it maybe the tracking device that was on your body? No, because I chose not to share my data. I told Facebook that my pictures didn't belong to it at midnight. It was an incognito mode tracking. Yeah, right, right. I wasn't watching weird porn. But then she's like, she's like, don't, you know, she's like, I go on without me.

I'll stay with this guy that you karate punched and almost killed. Right. So then we've got Hope and Bernard. They're chilling at a rest stop. It's now broad daylight. She's in full costume with the mask. Right. This fucking costume.

Can we please talk about this costume? Please. Yes. So it's giving, I don't know. Your aunt who was really sexy back when she was younger and was like the object of everyone's attention and still knows how to like get men to look at her. However, she has also failed to sort of like scale her dress up appropriately with her age and believes

that wearing the exact same thing that she did that, you know, slayed when she was 25 will still work on her now 30 years later. Or counterpoint, she's fucking nailing it. Yeah. Yeah. So okay.

So here's the, Here's the thing. The whole fucking point of this movie, other than writing off the trip to Japan and renting that vet, was the fact that he wanted his girlfriend or wife or whatever to wear this outfit. He feels like it. Or maybe she really likes it and wanted to wear it. Who knows? He was, I could see how comfortable she wasn't. No, he watched fucking Black Widow and he's like, baby, you could probably rock an outfit like that. And she was like, no.

He's like, oh, I just had an idea for a movie. I meant for a movie. It's for a movie. Yeah. I would never ask you to wear that. It's for the movie I'm writing. It's called, I hope. Do you know there's a pool in Phoenix that actually makes you cheat on?

It's crazy. And then there's this great moment. It's a continuity error in the movie, right? Because they've forgotten in the script that they actually haven't had her go out and fight crime in her cat suit yet. Nobody has seen. She hasn't had her Spider-Man moment. No, absolutely. Exactly. They forgot to have that in the movie.

But at this point, they've just decided that that happened and we just didn't know about it. Because she starts to walk away and everybody's got their cameras out. They're like, oh, my God, it's Spider-Man. Okay. To be fair, if I saw a woman dressed like this in public, I would be like, eh, I'm going to get some footage of whatever's happening. Because I'll tell you, it's going viral. Whatever woman dressed like that is doing at a rest stop in Arizona? Yeah.

Because the Corvette has pulled into this scenic lookout. And, you know, I don't know what she's supposed to be doing here, honestly, or like what they are supposed to be doing her and Bernard. But this is where she delivers her signature statement. And she gets to look into the cameras of all of these people as she does it. And she just says, you know what? We need to respect each other. Yeah, she has this big long both sides speech. Yes.

that this movie is all about. She starts by proclaiming, I am not a vigilante. And I was like, you are exactly a vigilante. You are, though. Definitionally, you are. Just lean into that because, you know, we watch you like kill rapists so you could.

Yeah. But in terms of the people who are here, it's not exactly a rest stop. They're just like on a highway. They're on like a roadrunner highway in the southwest with nothing around. Right. So there's this gaggle. of like Eli and 50 other people who all just like walking on a highway hoping for a celebrity to gock out?

I guess they all just really wanted to look out the scenic overlook. I guess. And then they were like, wow, this stunning natural beauty is one thing. But look at that lady. Yeah, that's stunning natural beauty. Okay. Are you a vigilante? Oh, she's going to give a speech.

No, no, no. She's going to give a speech. Okay. I'm hearing she's not. George Floyd was no safe. Oh, no. But I love the thought that she was just like everybody was like, just, why is she dressed like that?

And then she was like, oh, they must think I'm Spider-Man or whatever. And that that's why she gave the speech. And they're like, we didn't think you were a vigilante. What the hell are you talking about? We thought maybe you were doing like an amateur porn thing. Yeah, right. Right. We might need our footage as well.

Okay. So then we get my absolute favorite scene in the whole movie. And it's only like four seconds long. No, it's not. The fat ninja is your favorite scene. All right. No, it isn't. It genuinely isn't. This is a drone shot.

There's a drone shot that lasts for four seconds of this fucking Corvette pulling out of the parking lot. Oh, this is great. I take it. I'm so sorry. Morgan, I've included a picture if you could show them. They spent hours doing donuts in that goddamn parking lot before they pulled out. There are so many tire tracks. And also the way this is edited is very strange.

This is something that starts. happening a lot more in the back half of the movie, where for some reason, it will fade to black, then fade up from black in the subsequent scene. The movie will blink. Traditionally, again, to the point of like filmic language and how it works, that's something that you do to show that somebody has died or that a considerable amount of time has passed. Right. That is not the case with these trends.

No, you just got into the car. Yeah. Yes. Yeah. So, okay. So then we see her sneaking into her grandma's house. Yeah. My note here was, hope is at some lady's house now.

Sorry, store, it's a store. No, it's a house. And this is her grandma. Yep, who is 15 years older than her max. Max. Right? She's like, hey, why don't you have a book to read while you wait for me to be ready for this scene? And she hands her a book or hands her a book called My Name is Nobody.

That is a book written by this filmmaker who also made a movie out of it. That's right. Philip Pence's first film, actually, which I must, I must say this. It is so fucking funny because he wanted to be like, how can I show people that this is a period piece? And the solution that he came up with in the movie, my name is nobody, is that he slapped one of those like grainy,

fucked up film filters on the whole movie. Oh, no. Including the sound effect of the fucking broken projection. What? It's awesome. Awesome. Now, Josh, here's my question. How long is the movie? Because the book appears to be parking ticket. It is a coloring book, right? She has a pamphlet, I would argue. It is so tiny. And not a coloring book for adult. Coloring book for children. This is not, yeah, this is. Okay. And then this, this, I swear to you, this is what happens in the movie. I'm not just trying to make this sound as insane as possible. She picks up the coloring book. She opens it up. She's transported into a, a racist coffee commercial.

Yep. Right. Poor man Sam Elliott shows up with a donkey and says you probably have a lot of questions. Is this supposed to be her grandpa? I have this man. Who could it be? Who could it be? I thought it might be. I'll do a 12 hour episode

trying to figure out who the fuck that guy could possibly be. Sam Elliott hanging out in, you know, Nazi Germany if it's confusing. But it appeared that she got doodly dude into a cowboy coffee commercial by the coloring zine that was Yeah, yes, yes.

Yeah. I have no way and we will never reexploit because she then she goes back to her dad's house and she's like, you know, I saw grandma and, you know, she took me to the racist coffee commercial and dad's like, don't tell me about it. Don't tell me about it. Listen, last time that happened, it was a Norwegian pop band. They were called Aha. And when they took me on, it was a bad time for everybody.

So, okay, so then we cut to Malcolm. He's bad guy in with tats at a pool table. They have a two by two by two rubics cube. This fucking Rubik's cube. Play school Rubik's game. What? And there's actually a moment where a lot more difficult. It's not just that they like have this and this director.

Like nobody had the heart to break it to this director that he has the play school Rubik's cube. And then they wrote it in as like, it's a real puzzle what we're dealing with kind of like this. He's sort of like Malcolm sort of like talking about how difficult his life is as a mob gangster goon whatever. He says life's like a puzzle.

You can never figure the damn thing out. And then he throws the solved two by two Rubik's cube onto the table. You guys, he did figure it out. You know what's amazing? Right. The reason it's a two by two Rubik's cube that they were at the toy store and he was like, okay, the two by two

one is $4.99. And the three by three one is $6.99. Yes. It's a fucking Rubik's a same shit. It's the same shit. It's impossible to solve. You've got to pull all the stickers off put him back on again. As he's saying, of course, as he's doing that,

Rachel and the henchman that she's having a fair with, they're just like making out one room away. And they're like, hey, do you hear somebody kissing my wife? He peaks. He literally. Literally, I wish I could exemplify. He opens the door and they're like, behind it, Scooby Doop. Oh, it's so good.

It's so good. And it's played like it is the most serious thing in the world. And it is so comedic. They both jump onto the ceiling like Spider-Man. Right, right. Yeah. By the way, another thing about Malcolm's house is that for all of the scenes in Malcolm's house, there is very quiet music under the whole scene the whole time.

Was this music supposed to be dietic? think? I think so, yes. Yeah, I was just playing there in their speakers. I wanted them to pan over to a piano player just pressing one button once in one. Yeah, right, right. Yeah. So then, okay, so then Tiffany and Hope are getting pizza. They're friends now. They're keys. I said button for Pia. Yeah. Oh, I'd see, when you said button, I just assumed you meant like the sample button. Yeah, right. Yeah, actually. He didn't want to get yelled at by his mom. My mom was already, already yelling at me. Yeah. And she was actually madder than when he said they fucked a couple of episodes ago. So okay, but then they're at this pizza place and it gets robbed,

but Hope gets the robber with the old, now I have the gun. Now I have the gun. Yeah, she's kind of like, she just grabs it. And what I love is most movies don't have the courage to show how fumbling and impossible that is. But not this one. This one, she's like, no, no. Would you stop? Would you stop?

You twist my finger. If you're twisting my finger. Well, the more you resist, the more it's going to hurt. I'm going to hold it loose on my thumb like this. And you still. Right, right. So, but then after that, Tiffany knows that she's secretly the hero, right? Because, again, they forgot that they hadn't done any Spider-Man scenes.

And then she's like, wait, you're the one that saved me from the parking garage. And I'm like, oh, I bet that knowledge will never matter at all. Right. But this is the part where the henchman comes in to tell Malcolm about getting attacked by hope. He's like, you know. This is the henchman who is the secret boyfriend. of Rachel. Yes.

A different movie. Yeah. Yeah. Right. Yeah, exactly. And he's like, yeah, you know, and this is where, of course, he finds out that she was going to Mexico to get her abortion.

Right. And again, it's just like this abortion plot line is so central to this movie in a way that just like the rest of the politics of this movie is just bizarrely non-specific. Yes. Yes. And it's like, I don't know,

the other show that I do, because I talked about the worst of all possible worlds. Another show that I do is called ill-conceived. We talk about natalism, the ideology that sees like declining birth rates as this massive fucking problem. And generally speaking, it's just a stalking horse for reactionary policy and being like, well, we need to roll back abortion rights and we do that kind of thing. This movie, though, again, it's like it seems like it's against abortion tacitly kind of. But also the idea is that it still ought to be her choice. I just don't understand why they made the choice to make this plot completely nonspecific

in terms of how it interacts with actual policy in the real world, given that this movie appears to be set in present day, actual Arizona, actual the United States. Yeah, no, it makes no sense. Like, why would you bring this up if you had nothing to say about it? Right. And that's what I thought over and over again. I think that this director just feels like if he puts abortion as, as a plot line, then now suddenly his movie's controversial or whatever.

Right. Yeah. But over and over again, he keeps bringing up these controversial subjects, but, but he's not saying anything about him and therefore there's no controversy. Right. Two days before my son's fifth birthday, my Jewish mother texted me. I hope if when your son grows up, he wants to get a circumcision, you'll understand. And that is the politics of this movie. Hey, yeah, what's up? Quick question. Yeah, I do.

Yep. You're fielding the question. Cool. Yeah, Heath, what's up? So, in your experience, have a lot of people grown up and then been like, I would like to now. Apparently, my mom had been fucking cooking on a worry that my son would not just go ahead and get a circumcision as an adult, but that I would disown it. No goddamn son of mine is going to get a circumcision. I grow further suspicious

that my mother's text messages wrote this movie is what I'm saying. Just coming home late. You smell like pot. Let me see your penis right at the tell. Yeah, right. Do you know, we were on a break while the commercials were happening

while you find folks were learning about the folks over at Quince and I was scrolling through my texts and trying to figure out which of my mother's insane texts I should relate to the next insane plot point of this movie. I had too many choices.

So we have this long, bizarrely boring scene about the abortion and everything. But it ends with him forgiving her, but she has to keep the tracker on her now because she's carrying his baby all the time. Right. But she already did. And she wants to keep the baby question mark? We don't know. Right. Like the movie is so ambiguous about everything.

They just have Rachel say like what they know as a vaguely pro-choice thing from a friend. My body by choice. Hands off our pussies. Not exactly that. 86, 47? No, what? It's my choice. But the movie I think is saying like, yeah, it's your choice, but you should choose to have the cannibals child, I guess.

So then we get what I can only describe as a doing stuff montage, right? All the characters are doing the things that they do. And again, it could not be a wider variety of things. There's some more drug deals. I think her and Tiffany get another meal. All of the goddamn time. It's crazy. Yeah.

So then we violently cut to an aspiring school shooter. Oh, my God. That hope is going to talk down. Yeah, she's going to emotionally connect with the school shooter. Like, you really, this movie always keeps you guessing what is going to happen next. Because hope. Yeah, that's fair. Like, hope needing to go as, you know, Spider-Man and deal with a school shooter by talking him down.

Like, not something that would be fully unexpected. in a movie like this, but the way that it goes down. Yeah. I could never in a million years have predicted where it was going to go. She goes, look, I was bullied when I was in school too, and he's like, about what? Yes. Best line in the whole movie alert right here. Can I read this one?

Please do. Okay. Did you know, in the 1600s, they burned women at the stake just for having red hair? And on top of that, oh, gosh. I'm in the middle of a school massacre. Let it finish. You got a, you got a. And on top of that,

kind of busy. And on top of that, I'm Jewish and happened to have a big nose. Oh, no. What the fuck? You know, I'm going to still do the massacre unless you have a third thing. I really hope she's the one that wrote that line.

I promise you. No illusion. I've never promised anything with more certainty in my life. I am 100% with you, Eli. That woman improvised that model. Yes. Okay. The moment when she shows up, I laugh too.

So it's a school shooter. He's got a gun. He's screaming. And he hasn't shot anybody yet. He hasn't shot anybody yet. And then I guess Hope has spidey senses for these things, but like kind of late because the school shooting is like about to have. This guy's already in there and like about to kill people.

And then she just walks in the front door The school in Catwoman suit In leather and a mask And you watch a school shooter be like What the fuck is her? Is that school's mom? Did someone stop? Did someone's mom stop

Men's sexual role place? Right. I mean, I am going to stop the massacre for a second Because this is just so arrested. Okay. Right. Well, and to Josh's point, too, this school shooter is like 34

and a foot and a half taller than hope. It's just a bizarre casting choice. So yeah, so, but she talks him down and then she has to get out by like swapping clothes with somebody. Yeah, they try to do like an inside man thing. Yeah, right, right. I also think it's important to point up here again, just to the inchoate politics of this movie. The film's position seems to be that school shooters are the fault of the people who bully them. Yep, seems to be that. Exactly. Yeah. That the principal did wrong. Also, the school shooter is a drag queen? I guess?

That's the other thing. It's like this kid has these psychosexual issues but was bullied by the administration of this principal question mark. Yeah. Oh, so weird. So that night we get the detective. He's looking through picks because he's determined that the

vigilante is somebody who works at that school and is, I guess. I guess that it's the school library that Rachel's been going. I've no fucking idea. But he's figured out out. So he goes to the library and he confronts her. And he's like, hey, I know you're the superhero. So either I can arrest you for superheroing or you can team up with me and we can take down Malcolm together.

And she's like, is Malcolm a bad guy? I have not met him in the movie. Oh, sorry, he's your friend's boyfriend. Has she not mentioned? Remember the guy you punched and she was mad about this? So he works. Oh, yeah, fuck. This detective, by the way, brand new character.

Yeah, not a guy I've seen up until this point. So, yeah, and he gives her a business card, which we only see face down because they weren't going to make a fucking business character for this guy. Pretty good. I'm not a superhero, but I do have speed therapy powers I just learned. Well, yeah, right, right.

I could help with that. So, okay, so then Hope and Rachel run into each other again at the library and Rachel forgives her for, you know, punching that guy too hard or whatever it was that she was mad about. And this is where just, again, Apropos of nothing that we have that has been added to the script that we're aware of, she's decided that she wants to take Malcolm down. Why does she want that?

Because, quote, that son of a bitch killed my mother. This is the first we're learning about that. They're at a school library having this conversation, by the way. I want to be with that. Yeah. Fuck, I'm trying to study. He killed your mother? I was trying to figure out which of these.

20 copies of the same book I wanted to check out. God damn it. So yeah, but then sometime later and quite inexplicably, Rachel and Hope are colluding together at night. She's like introducing Rachel to Detective Morris so that he can, she can help take Malcolm down. And then we see fucking the bad guy's bad guying. We don't know what day it is anymore or what anybody's up to.

but the henchmen are telling Malcolm that everything is all set for something. Now, this is not something that they forgot to set up. This is something that will never happen. That's just the kind of thing that bad guys might say. Everything is set, boss. But we do get all of them having a big meeting where they are like talking about all of their criminal things that they would like to do, I guess. and just some of the most abominable sound work in the movie at this point, by the way. Like, loudest things in the mix here, number three is the dialogue.

That's the third loudest thing. Number two is the piano. Number one is the goddamn refrigerator. Well, it was closest to the microphone. Yes, it was. It sure was. It definitely was. You can scrub that out if you just the...

We don't have the studio version of fiction. So, but Detective Morris shows up at this point, to warn Malcolm that he's going to take him down. Oh, is that what he said? I couldn't hear him over the refrigerator. Yeah, right. So we do see like a wider shot of where they are in this moment. Detective walks in and it's like, oh, so their daytime layer is a cheesecake fact.

Yeah. It's not open. Because there's something for everybody. Well, right. Obviously, the menu is quite expensive. They all do a big evil like shot together, but they have. five different drinks. So it's like, we're all going to

do a shot. Oh, you have a glass of water. I have a glass of water. Oh, water. Should I drink it fast? Yes. Yeah. And now take this shot. There's this great moment where the cop tells him, he says, until I'm in the dirt, you're going down. And I'm like, that doesn't work

as a sentence. Yeah, that whole trash talk scene is full of near misses of tropes, right? Yeah. He'd be like, someday, you and me, we're going to figure out which way the fuck I'm lost I should wait

back up the only way that you're only doing one day fuck the only way that you and me are going to find

our way not I keep making it it up Greg strength I'm the

some drug guy the detective leaves I'm the you guys ready for appetizers

not now I'm I'm under my place I do want the mac and cheese balls That detective, the reporter, and that hope, bitch, I want him dead. And I'm like, wait, how does he even know hope at this point? I don't think they've met.

Okay. So then we cut to Malcolm in a helicopter because they can also write up. A real goddamn helicopter. Yes. Another thing he was able to write off was helicoptering. Again, we don't know what's going on. So they helicopter around and then eventually they shoot one guy and push him out of the helicopter. This is the most impressive shot in the entire movie.

When they shove this guy out of the helicopter and then you watch the ragdow fall. from the helicopter down to the ground. Again, there are so many moments in this movie where you're like, how the fuck did they have the money to do that? But they still made a movie this bad. Yes. It's the thick karate guy again. He just lands.

And does the Kippa? Yeah, right. So yeah, so they dubbed that guy out. Apparently, and I think I learned this from maybe Heath's notes, this is the guy that was going to give the information to the reporter earlier. Yes, this is the guy at the very beginning who demanded immunity.

I only clocked it because of the hat. That's the thing. They throws hat down after him. Oh, okay, yeah. So, and then they shotgun Detective Morris to death. And I'm like, yeah, you probably shouldn't have walked in and said, I'm going to arrest you any minute now. You should just go in and arrested it when you were ready to do that. Right.

And then they poisoned Tiffany, I guess, the reporter? Presumably, although we don't know that that happened. No. It's just that one of the goons is a fake barista, a fake waiter. at the coffee shop that Tiffany goes to and she serves and he serves her and it's like well what will you have my regular

oh what's your usual order well it's a coffee with two splendas okay it's actually even better than that because she goes oh I've never seen you before and he goes yeah a bunch of people were sick today and she goes I'll have the usual and he has to be like I don't know we just established

if we don't know each other do you think they briefed me this morning on all the regular's usual well and then she The only world in which I would know your dream. And it gets even dumb her because he goes, she goes, oh, right, my usual is a vanilla latte with two splendos. And he goes, I have the perfect thing for you. And I'm like, well, you just said it all evil.

She's going to know. Is it a vanilla latte with two swindles? I don't think that it is. Otherwise, I would just say, okay. We will not see Tiffany after the scene, by the way. No, that's she not. Well, we'll see her for, oh, no, we won't. That's right, because they don't even use hers as bait.

rap on Tiffany this scene So okay So then we see Hope She's pulling her fancy vet Into the garage When she gets a phone call from Malcolm She has to come to this spot or they'll kill Rachel

Rachel Rachel is the stakes of the movie now Right And you thought that he wanted the baby I don't Okay Well yeah right Yeah that's a good point

Your library buddies Oh Yeah right So then okay So then she pulls up in that place And some dude Just does a bunch of fancy fucking flips for no reason

at all. Really good. Really good. She punches him in the heart. He dies. So good. This is like all those Ikedo videos. Yep. Everyone, where they're like, they do a bunch of like wave emotion. Yeah. Right. Right. Yeah. I punched you on.

So yeah. So she kills fancy flips and then we get an alert goes off on a gay best friend's phone that her heart rate is up. So he has to go help. Right. I guess he gets an alert every time she masturbates. I don't know how this fucking shit works.

I'm doing cocaine. You can't just keep calling at 3 in the morning. Yeah. And masturbating. There's a moment where Malcolm sends the, he figures out that the henchies having an affair with Rachel and sends them off to die. This will not matter in any fucking way.

Nope. Because nothing ever does. But what, okay, I'm sorry, one thing does. One thing matters in the whole goddamn movie. And that is the roller skating pad guys. Sorry. Not just the roller skating. And not roller skating.

Roller skating. They are all on inline skate. A circle of rollerblading bad guys show up. But they are not there to fight hope. No, they are merely the introduction to. Fat Kemp up guy. The prayer of the roller boys. Fat.

That was your sense. Why would he be here to fight her now? He's been the ultimate heel the entire time. some reason. So I assume when he showed up, I'm like, oh, they're going to take on the roller skating bad guys together. But no, the roller skating bad guys will only ever stand in a circle

and watch other people get their asses skating. I'm in town. So this movie's pretty long. So I was like, this is getting a little slow. You guys need to pick it up. And then they cut to the fucking rollerblading. I was like this. Okay. We're back. I'm watching again. But then it's the big Sensei fight and they just stand in a circle, but they're on rollerblades and they're not very good at rollerblades.

So as we're watching this fight happen, a couple of them start to roll backwards and are like, oh. Yep, yep. Yeah, there's a real range. I mean, speaking of somebody who actually does rollerblade, there's a real range here that I'm seeing in terms of competence. So yeah, but then, so we have this long fucking fight scene of, but again, this is a 50-year-old woman that's never done any fucking martial arts. And is in great shape for 50 years old, but she doesn't know what she's doing. So everything is one shot of like clearly the, you know, the fat kepp-up guy does know marshal.

Right, right. And so he's going like, okay, so if you bring your arm up here, I can just kind of roll over top of it. And it'll look like you knocked me down. You should stop eating bread. Oh, oh, my God. So, okay. So then we cut to the henchies taking Rachel home. Do you mean a lot of sugar?

Do you drink a lot of juice? There's this long moment. Again, it doesn't matter. Henchy kills the guy that's supposed to kill him and they get away and we're done with Rachel now. God, in this whole fight too, I just needed to note the sound mixing. It's like the music is bass boosted and side chain to Hellenback. You cannot hear anything. No, no.

It's so good. You can get this beef broth. It's like a bone broth. You're dead. So, okay, so, and then we, we want you to fight the guy with tattoos that we've been set up as the badass for the entire movie. Remember the bloody guy from the very beginning? He's back.

Hope does the five-point palm exploding heart techniques from Kill Bill 2 on him and he dies. And then she says, I'm sorry. Yep, no idea why. She does this very tender eye close on a guy who she's never met. She kills him. She kills him with risk control, by the way. I'm not exaggerating. No, that's what happens in the movie.

And then, so then Malcolm shows up and just shoots her to death. I like that. It was like, all right, the roller blades. To death. Gun. We're doing gun. Yeah. But like to death question. Well, okay. Also, like, didn't her great grandma survive a gunshot?

Yeah, she did. So, okay. Also, that third strand of DNA is going to block a lie. It's like, no pain. No cancer or her herpes. Yeah. So she goes, there's this great moment. She stands up. He's got the gun. She says, do what you have to. There will always be a.

And then he just shriems. Yeah. Right. And it's over. And here I'm like, was that the climax? Yeah, right. Because it does seem like, God, if it were supposed to be moving. moving into falling action now.

And there's only 10 minutes left in the movie at this point. So I was like, where, where are we? Okay, that would have been the best ending though. Yes, Noah. Absolutely. It was like, good guy speech. I'm going to tell you a blam. Yep.

Cut. End of movie credits. Yeah. Perfect. But then there's this great moment. She's now Bernard shows up and grabs her body, takes her to the hospital. So we got dad sitting at the hospital. And the doctor says, you know, there's no chance.

He goes, is she dead? And he goes, she's brain dead. and the writers to this movie think that means she's in a coma. I have no idea what brain dead means. Because then he goes, I don't know if you can hear me. I'm like, she can't. She can't. Even if she could hear you, it wouldn't matter because she's a vegetable.

Do you remember when the Terry Schiavo thing happened? What did you think about that at the time? Do you remember? Because you were about 40 when that happened. Are we making a statement here? Genuinely, I don't know. Right. Yeah, because she was going to come back to life.

Yeah. And again, like, I guarantee you somewhere in my text is my mom being like, I think Terry Shivo's parents really needed that. And he's being like, cool, where are you? There's also a crazy moment where Bernard really wants to die in solidarity with her. He says that it's all his fault, which doesn't even make sense from the perspective of his character. No, take me there, man. Really more about a long history of anti-Semitism. So, Hollywood is.

Yeah, obviously. Weird side effect to that with the, you know, superpower. Dad, really, his fault, if anything. Yeah, right. And Bernard and Dad fall asleep holding hands for some reason. I'm like, was this a love story between Bernard and Dad? But then, okay, then we get fucking Malcolm, he's hanging out in his red lit car as his want. His prom limo. He's driving the rolls this time. Yes, he is. He is. And so he's driving down the road, but all of a sudden, like eight cops pull him over again, where the fuck did that? they get the money to have eight cop cars in this scene. But the cops pull him over and that sexy FBI agent, Agent Stark is there to bust him somehow.

I had thought the movie had forgotten about the Conti FBI agent. Right. No, he's back. No. And he's looking the fiercest he's looked in the entire movie. He's actually leveled up during his time. Yes, yeah. So, but yeah, but then, but now they arrest him and,

and that's it for him. and then the movie is not quite over because then we have to see Hope in Vegas so that we know that she made it. Is that what's happening here? She, it's a boast, it's Batman, right? Where it's like Batman's now in Italy doing Batman shit.

Right? She walks by someone dressed as her. Right. And Vegas has like impersonators. So that was the idea. Has Hope impersonators now. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. She's holding up a sign the other hope is that says,

the world needs hope. And hope smiles and the movie is over. That is it. Yeah, she has recovered from being brain dead. And then the movie has like an in-memorium. It's like this movie is dedicated to the life of Gladys Wallgreen. She was 90. You can't make fun of it.

It was Gladys. She was originally going to play home. Yeah. But she was too sexy. All right. Well, Josh, we ran a little long here, but I have to say, I really appreciate you hanging out with this. Well, I have to get you back on for a short. movie where we can get more out of you.

But it was a delight to share this gem of a film with you. It was a delight being on. And thank you again so much for having me. Yeah, you bet. And if our audience is not done with you yet, where can they go to hear more from you? Well, I co-host two podcasts. The first one is called The Worst of All Possible Worlds, which we were talking about a bit up top.

Weekly Case Studies in the Pop Culture of a Dying Empire. Every other week's episode, we release exclusively to Patreon. Or if you'd like to get a taster of it, you can listen to the ones in the other weeks, which we release in their entirety. Honestly, if you like this show, you'll probably like our show. We talk about all sorts of shit. Movies, TV, video games, long-running strange children's evangelical radio drama called

Adventures in Odyssey. Oh, my God, I thought you were going to tell me that you guys talked about strange children. Okay, all right. No, that's way better. A series of episodes about this one KIPP. There's a weird-ass fucking kid. Okay, yeah. There's this one guy, and he's really good. at karate. We love talking about it. So yeah, go check that out if you like

just conversations about media in the way that the narratives in media sort of shape our reality. The other show I host is called Ill Conceived. It's a podcast about... The medium is the message. Absolutely. Podcast about natalism, which is the ideology that sees declining birth rates as the

most important problem facing our times right now. This is not our position, but it's the position that we're trying to interrogate in the show because it turns out that it explains a lot when you start digging into it. Doesn't it? So again, that is ill-conceived. You can get that wherever you get your podcast as well.

You can also follow me on Blue Sky at Bosch. Dot worst possible. World or check out my website, which is Joshborman.com. Those are my plugs. And thank you again for having me on. Awesome. And of course, we'll have that all linked on the show notes as well. And while that's going to do it for our review of Operation,

hope that's not going to do it for the episode just yet because we still need to step on another rake next week. So, Eli, tell us what's on deck. When radical Islamic terrorists hijack a liberal colleges pro-Palestine encampment, A rag-tag band of red-blooded students, a security guard, and a Delta Force vet must arm up to save their clueless peers. We'll be watching The Daily Wires. Run, hide, fight, infidel. Oh, I'm so fucking excited.

Fuck, yes. All right. So with that to look forward to, we're going to bring episode 575, Merciful, Close. Once again, a huge thing to all the patronage. to help make show go if you're like, you get out yourself among the ranks, you can make a per episode donation of Patreon.com. slash Godawful in there by earn early access

to it at every version of every episode. You can also have a ton of by leaving a five-star review and by sharing all this show on all your various social media platforms. And if you joined this show, be sure check out our sibling shows. The Scathing Aetian, D&D minus, and the scrap to grind available wherever podcast live.

If you have questions, comments or cinematic suggestions, you can email godawful movies at gm.com. Tim Robertson takes care of our social media along with Lillie Bosnick. Our theme song was written and performed by Rice, Laugh with Druffe on Mars. All the other music was written and performed by our audio engineer, Morton Clark, and was used with permission.

Thanks again for forgiveness. I'll check your life this week for Heath Enright and Eli Busting. I'm no illusions, promise to work hard to earn another joint night so we can tell then. We'll leave you with the American graffiti clothes. Hope quit being a superhero karate vigilante and became a therapist. Oh, God. She's okay.

All right. Tiffany died from the poison coffee. Oh, yeah. Well, yeah. She can't win them all. Yeah. That doctor eventually did learn what brain dead means. I'm glad Tiffany died.

You don't go to a sit-down restaurant and order just a coffee. That's crazy. Deserved. These people made like a dozen more movies. They sure did. Oh, happy ending. Love it. This content is scanned credentialed,

which means you can report instances of harassment, abuse, or other harm to their hotline at 617-249455. Or on their website at creatoraccountabilitynetwork.org. This podcast is a production of Puzzle and a Thunderst, LLC and was created without the use of generative AI. Its contents may not be used for AI training. Copyright 2026. All rights reserved.