Going Deep with Chad and JT - Ep 123 - Zoom Podcast w/ Kevin The Shmole, Strider, Joe, and Aaron's first appearance!!!

Episode Date: April 1, 2020

What up Stokers! We got the legends, Strider, Uncle Joe, Kevin the Shmole, and Aaron (in his visual debut). We talk self isolation, the state of our nation, and dongs. JT's audio sucks but he's dropping fire (he also wrote this... what up).Sponsored by Manscaped: Get 20% Off and Free Shipping with the code GODEEP20 at Manscaped.com. If you wanna trim your pubes during a contagion.

We are rolling. Hey, what's up, Stokers of Stoke Nation? This is Chad Kroger coming in with the Going Deep with Chad and JT podcast. Guys, before we begin, I want to remind you once again that we are brought to you by Manscaped. Manscaped, thank you so much for keeping our trims pubed, for looking after our hogs, for making sure that our dongs are looking fresh and clean. Because we may be in quarantine right now. We may be isolated. But you know what? I've been trimming those pubes hairs because I am ready to rock and roll for whenever it's lifted.

Just because we're in isolation does not mean that your dong should go unkempt. Also, Manscaped is April's Testicular Cancer Awareness Month. Did you guys know that one guy every hour, every day is diagnosed with testicular cancer? So this is a reminder to check your nuts. Make sure that you don't have those bumps. And if you do, actually just go to a doctor. Get him to check those. But you can check yourself too.

And I'll dive more into that in the mid-roll. But for the time being, get 20% off and free shipping with code godeep20 at manscaped.com. That's 20% off with free shipping at manscaped.com and use code godeep20. Your balls will thank you, especially in this upcoming important month. All right. I'm here with my compadre on Zoom, Jean-Thomas.

What up? What up, dog? And we got Aaron on Sean Thomas. What up? What up dog. And, uh, we got Aaron on the camera. Uh, this is a big debut. Dude,

Aaron, like I've been getting so many messages from people are like, when can we see Aaron? When is Aaron going to come on the pod? I'd be like, he doesn't want it. He doesn't want to be visible. It's never going to happen.

And then literally three days after I make these declarations here you are not only on the pod but rocking the st louis lid and with kitty cat in the frame yep there's hudson kitty cat oh that's a dog it's hudson wait i know hudson dude i thought that was the cat. When the screen is littler, it looks littler. Yeah, he does have cat ears right now. Yeah, yeah. You can put it into a gallery view, too. That'll let you see everyone kind of at once. Oh, nice.

Yeah. How do we do that? It's in the upper right-hand corner. Yeah. Aaron, how are you holding up?'m good you know growing a quarantine beard nice looks good this isn't my uh most ideal uh visual visual coming out are you still doing it no not really no everyone's doing zoom yeah everyone's kind of doing zoom or something else and and um you know keeping the foot traffic in there as low as possible right has anyone

recorded since like in the past two weeks uh we just shot something with al yeah like a testing of a new pod but that's about it not um well maybe when strider comes on here he can make his big announcement yeah about it oh right right right i was like what are you talking about yeah i was watching you scan your brain for it uh chad how are you dude i'm good i'm good i'm trying to uh stay productive but uh you know enjoy my time in in qt um yeah i'm trying to stay stoked you know it's ups and ups and downs because you turn on the news and it's so insane dude it's you got to put a cap on how much news you take in i mean for me because i'm like so compulsive especially you know if i have reason to look at it like i'm trying to find information yeah it's it's very dispiriting

yeah i mean the first few days i would i would i had like a routine i would wake up and i just watch the news like till like 11 a.m and uh then my day would be ruined and i try to win it back uh but now i'm able to put in doses but you know it's uh i try i've been trying to find like the right kind of news like the more optimistic stuff because just you know i always like hearing better news than just like the doomsday stuff but what's like uh what's an example of like good news uh there's just articles about you know like there's this noble laureate or something this Nobel Peace Prize winner who's like he's like you know the the projections for like millions dying he's like I just he basically was just saying I don't think it's going to be as bad as they're predicting,

but he's a credible dude. So I sort of found a lot of solace in that article. Yeah. I saw that was in the LA times. Right. Yeah. And then that got, that got reposted like nine times by people being like,

scientist says we're not all going to die. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I know, you know, it was, i've been looking for more good news too and uh it's tough because you know like uh and i don't i don't i

think trump's doing it more for the market but he'll like put out like such optimistic news sometimes and then his people will like counter him and And then, but then like, and I think that's too optimistic, but then like Eric Garcetti, the LA mayor, when he came out and said like, a lot of people are going to die. A lot of people we love are going to die. He got a lot of credit from that within the comedy community for being sober and honest. Yeah.

But I thought that was a bit too pessim pessimistic i mean i don't maybe it's good leadership because it's it's scaring us and to stay inside yeah and maybe that was what the agenda was but me i i always take people at face value and i'm like well you're saying this because this is what your experts have told you to say because this is what they think will happen and it was just too it was too painful it was it was it was a really brutal statement yeah i you know when i read that i figured at first i got upset then i was like i was like oh he has to say that because that's going to keep people inside you know like if we didn't uh enforce these measures then like it would be much more exponential. But I just figured he was doing that. You know, I figured he and the media, they're gonna go to worst case scenario,

because they don't want to be on the wrong side of history. And be like, it's fine. It's okay. And then people, you know, relax and start going outside and stuff. And then it gets worse and worse. I always figured they're going to go to the worst-case scenario to keep us inside. That's my takeaway. No, and it came right on the heels of, like, the parks and the beaches being packed. Yeah. So it was kind of a response to that.

What did you think about it, Aaron? Yeah, I thought he's, like, setting the bar really low so that when we finally get to come out of here, like, it'll seem like, Oh, it was, it was one that bad. Like, yeah. Yeah. It's like when you invite your friends over and you don't want them to get their expectations up. You're like,

it's just going to be a little get together. And then if it turns out to be a rager, everyone's like, Whoa, that was way better than I thought. You know, it doesn't even have to be a great rager. It just sounds pretty fun. Yeah. Like when Trump said, he's like, I think we can reopen the country by you know easter and then like yesterday or something he had to take that back and he's like never mind it's april 30th that just makes it look like you're like oh fuck dude you're just

disappointed everyone what and i think i think the markets rallied after he said easter and so i also you know this this is like i'll probably this, but like, I hadn't really watched the full Trump news conference before. Yeah. And I'd only read like the snippets and like the New York Times, which is like the main paper I read. And I do think that the reporters can do a better job of asking him questions because they so often like when he makes a mistake like that are like, so you said april 12th and now you're going back on it do you want to admit that you made a mistake and it's like they just want to catch him making a mistake which i understand why because he does that shit all the time but like wouldn't it be better to just be like hey so we realized that you pushed the date back what what made us push the date back and then

we could actually get the information out of them. Because if you just say, hey, we appreciate your optimism, but why did we push it back? Give us information. But they keep trying to catch him on stuff. It reminds me of the smart kid in class trying to call out, he yelled, not doing something right. It's like just, I don't know. I just think there's got to be a smarter way to get him to give us information it is very annoying I I do beef with the the media a lot with how they sort of seem to still try to politicize everything when you're just like you know like I was watching an interview with on CNN with Dr. Fauci like head of the infectious diseases and yeah yeah and uh

they were talking about how they they extended those measures to april 30th and he's like uh so the reporters just like you know when i when i presented the research and the data to trump he got it right away and uh the reporter just kept asking questions he's like did it take much convincing on your part like how long did it take to convince him and you're like why are you asking this shit like what like there's no well in fact pin it on him so hard and you're like that's not the time this is not the time for that shit well and fauci could be saying that so that he stays in trump's good graces so that trump will still listen to him yeah and then calling him out for that So that he stays in Trump's good graces So that Trump will still listen to him

And then calling him out for that And it's like dude he's probably only doing that So that he can keep Trump's trust and then save lives So why don't you just let him use His little ruse to take advantage Of Trump's need to be complimented And we can all get through this more easily

But I'm so frustrated With like everybody that like, it's hard for me. I don't know. It's a, it's crazy that we're there. I'm just, I'll get back to the stoke in a second,

but I'm just like, it's crazy that we're the richest country in the world. And that we seem like we had, we had our first case of Corona at the same time that South Korea had their first case. Yeah. The disparity. I know we have a bigger population and like we have more states and whatever i don't i don't know that is for a fact but i'm assuming like so maybe there's more bureaucratic channels to go through here but like the disparity still doesn't make sense like it's just it's it's

extraordinarily hard to understand why we're in this difficult position. Yeah. I think, I think our, our blessing is also our curse. The fact that we're so into freedom and stuff that when the government tells us to do something, we're like, fuck you. I'm in orange County right now. And it's insane. Like I think these people here, like they've won at life and they've been on a, they've been on a heater for 40 years. They're all these jackdads who dominate at real estate.

And I'm like, I don't care how good you are at real estate. Like this virus will eat your lungs, dude. It does not care about like how, you know, good you are at pickup basketball still like just, yeah, it's, it's, it's very, I don't know know and then i don't know i know i'm i know i have a tendency to be uh dramatic but i think it's better in this situation right now to be dramatic than to be in denial like oh because if you're right if you're in denial and you're right all right we we slow down the economy and that's a big deal and i really my heart goes out to people who are struggling on the financial end but if you're wrong like we could go from a hundred thousand people dying to like a million or two million and i just don't think that's that's just not okay yeah yeah

it it really hit me hard when they closed the beaches that that's uh it's so weird but you know i got you got to listen to him i'll stay but you know i i in terms of uh the quarantine i feel like i was kind of made for this i was kind of bumming today just because uh i don't know i had some beers yesterday so maybe that was it i didn't sleep that well but other than that i've been thriving that's right dude i do i've been i've been having a good quarantine as well i've been like just on instagram a lot talking to a lot of different people it's really made me appreciate my friends a lot more even like i told a story on the pot about this guy who uh talked shit on me to my girlfriend at the time trying to get closer to her i thought and I found out he got corona and uh yeah and I just like dude I feel so bad for him and I'm like I have no ill will towards the guy I mean I still want to

dominate him in our chosen profession but that's more of like Nikki Lada from Rush thing where it's like you make me better because I want to be better than you or whatever but like yeah even on all that stupid frivolous stuff I just want him to be okay and healthy and it's like yeah a lot of people in our community who i thought i didn't like i'm realizing now like i love yeah people who used to annoy the fuck out of me i'm like you know what i love this dude like yeah he's a part of my life and and i would very much miss having this dude annoying me in my life and it's it's it's been good for that just and like you know i'm staying with my mom and she annoys the hell out of me but she's not feeling for that just and like you know i'm staying with my mom and she annoys the hell out of me but she's not feeling well right now and i'm worried i may

have asymptomatically passed corona to her a friend of mine had no sense of taste or smell and and could have passed it to me and and uh and yeah my mom's the fucking greatest dude my mom's a fucking superstar and it's like it's and just watching her when she's feeling good, it brings so much joy to my life that I get to have her as my mom. And, and I am grateful for whatever the quarantine has done in that respect and making me appreciate all the good things in my life. Yeah. I, it really has put things into perspective and it just,

I mean, simple things of just like going to the movies and all that, going to concerts, hanging out with friends. Uh, I remember I was at the groceries and shout out to your mom too. You know, I,

I, I, I, you told me about the situation and, and I'm, uh, I wish her all the best. She's the best.

But, you know, again, in terms of, like, the timeline, I don't think it adds up for you. Yeah, well, I got tested, so we'll find out. Yeah. I'm just being optimistic there. You can get the results in 10 minutes. Maybe, dude. Whatever the results results are i probably will share them on some form of social media i mean i'm probably going to go through this whole thing uh the interaction gives me something and i hope that people get something out of it but

yeah it's going to be a very modern quarantine for me. Yeah. You know what's been great about this whole thing is dank memes. Oh, the memes. Oh yeah. Are you guys watching Tiger King? Oh yeah. Yeah. You know, it's kind of sad to me. Bro, bro. Same, same dude.

I don't, I don't, I like, I see how people think it's funny. I don't, like, it's just like, I feel so bad for these people. It's like one episode is funny. And then as they go deeper and deeper into how dark these people go and how they care about the people in their lives. Yeah. Like, dude, when Joe Exotic's boyfriend, spoiler alert, if you want to hear a spoiler, tune out for the next couple minutes.

When Joe Exotic's boyfriend kills himself basically because he's living a life that joe exotic uh kind of manipulated him into that he never really wanted to lead yeah and joe exotic makes it about himself immediately afterwards and shows no decency towards his family i was like i'm out like it jumped the shark for me in terms of sadness it's too much his family. I was like, I'm out. It jumped the shark for me in terms of sadness. It's too much ugliness. You know what I mean?

I just got through episode three with Carol and her husband. Oh shit, I spoiled it for you, dude. I'm sorry. I don't know. It's hard for me to watch. That's my honest feeling. I don't enjoy it. I'm watching it. I just feel bad. It's only going to get worse, dude. You're just at the tip of the iceberg. I'm watching it. I'm like, I just feel bad. Yeah, dude, it's only going to get worse.

Did you just have the tip of the iceberg? I'm watching Munich right now. Oh, well, that's going to perk you up. Yeah. I've been watching. I've been watching Munich,

the pianist. Although there are two movies, two movies that did fire me up are King's Speech and Son of a Woman. Oh yeah. Those are good. Yeah. What do you think of Son of a Woman? Son of a Woman. Son of a woman oh yeah those are good yeah you think it's sending a woman send a little bit send of a woman um but yeah yeah going back to the whole like changing perspective like i was at the grocery store just like juking people you know yeah in my mind i was like if i was like if any one of these people coughs or sneezes in my direction, I will fucking, you know,

but then, but then it's like, I'm like, it's so typical to have those thoughts, especially if you're in like LA traffic or, you know, people are being slow at the grocery store. But then it,

as soon as I like had those thoughts, I just had like a sudden like shift in my mind. I'm like, I'm like, Oh, we're all in this situation together. We're all just trying to survive. Like,

you know, these poor people, I mean, you know, the economy is tanking it. Like, there's no reason for me to have those thoughts. No,

I feel you. I mean, dude, but if someone coughs, that's like when some people are coughing and not covering their mouth right now, I'm like, bro,

like I'll kill you. I'll kill you. Do you?. Okay. This isn't going to be my beef of the week, but I got to be North Korea is testing missiles right now, you know, cause everybody's taking care of problems at home, dude. I am so fucking pissed off in North Korea for doing that. We're testing missiles when the whole world's on its knees. That is such a bitch ass move, dude. When we come back to full health, I don't want people to die, but we got to find a way to fucking slap you dude like like to do that's like if your whole family's like the whole neighborhood's sick and you're going in everyone's apartment and like

rifling through their stuff it's like it's not the time dude and it's just like i'm very frustrated with you north korea i i guess i should have should have seen it coming, maybe. I was thinking about that, dude. I'm like, this is the perfect time to drop it. I kind of gawked at you, Kim Jong, whatever. Did you hear the rumor? Maybe this is just a joke on the internet, but the rumor that they had, like, one case and just shot him. Oh, really?

That's how they kept it to zero? That's pretty hilarious. I believe it, dude. They're on there. Yeah. What else was another thing like i i've felt such tremendous guilt oh i'm gonna stay at my mom's because like i just like i was so scared i was like oh man where am i gonna feel safe so i just went to my mom's and it was it was i you know i i will see but it it was

i i feel a lot of guilt over that move but so I've been trying to figure out what to do with that guilt. And so I've just been bringing in and outers to all the different hospitals and dropping them off at the ERs. Yeah. I just get like a bunch of double doubles. I try to spread out which kinds I get and drop them off at the ER. But I don't go into the ER. They're like, yeah, just bring them in.

I'm like, no, no, no, no. Send some right here. So you just go to the entrance and someone grabs them? Yeah. You can just bring food to the entrance and just give them to people. I talked to a doctor and I was like, well, what can we do to help? And it's like, he's like, we've got food and food. Just bring food to the ER and it'll let us know people are thinking about us and it'll give us some food. So, and you can do it would fire me up you can do it totally safely too you don't have to come close to any the closest i've come to is like three or

four feet nice yeah but that that's like been one thing that's given me some momentary relief from i don't know just the stress of all this yeah well i mean did they reject the fries, though? Aaron, what would you do if you were an ER doctor and someone gave you In-N-Out fries as a donation? Would you eat them? I'd look for whatever's around to flavor them. You know, I'd have someone cough on them. I don't know. You'd do it using to stuff a wound.

Yeah. I have someone cough on them. I don't know. You're using the stuff of wound. Do you remember when that doomsday happened, which was March 12th or something? It was chaos. The Wednesday when we went to Costco? Yeah, then the next day and he texted me about... I don't know if we want to talk about it.

No, we probably can't talk about that yeah um but it's just like you know when when you hear someone that you had been in contact may have it you just you're like at that point you're like what do i do i guess i just have to stay here like it was even before the whole yeah well i think i think too it's like there's such a range in how this thing manifests itself in people you know what i mean and i think the news actually does this i don't know it's it's double-sided because they'll it seems like the news will always find the instances of people who shouldn't have gotten so sick from it who did get so sick from

it yeah we'll find a story of like a 19 year old and they'll jam it down your throat. And it's good because it'll scare college kids who are being fucking idiots and to stay at home. But, but then it sticks in your brain. It freaks you out. And I think for a lot of us, you know, I definitely don't want to get it, but I think for a lot of us, we'll pass through it relatively well. You know what i

mean that that's the hope but but it's hard with this thing because as we're finding out more about it seems like everyone has different symptoms yeah and so it's like it's and it's and it can take like weeks to really develop in people and then some people it's like right away it's it's really just a motherfucking piece of shit figure it out dude simplify yourself stop spreading we got the picture we're scared straight just get the fuck out man yeah it's a schmall it's a total schmall dude gotta be booked well dude so i was doing a i was doing phone sex and then the first couple nights I was like, this is the best quarantine ever. I'm having like phone sex with girls. This is the greatest thing in the world.

And then third night I had phone sex with a girl and then I cried to her afterwards. And then I drove to my childhood home, which is like 15 minutes from where my mom is now. And I just cried outside of it. And the people living there probably thought they were about to get purged. They didn't realize it was just a guy in his early 30s going through his feelings and then I drove to my old high school which has a building named after my my family yeah and my first instinct was to go pee on it but I resisted yeah why don't you pee on it I don't

understand um I think because to me it's like i'm like if you really knew who me and my family were you wouldn't name a building after us but maybe you would because you just want to take the money so this is all a bunch of it was like teen anger angst like pissed off at the hypocrisy of like the world and the system and then so i think the best way to to fight that is to pee on it. Then, I'm not going to pee on it. I just figured you wanted to mark your spot. Yeah, I want to say, it's my building, bitch.

Yeah, who knows? Yeah, my GF went to her parents' house. I took a one-way ticket to the drill factory. Dude, okay, so parents house so i you know took a one-way ticket to the drill factory but dude okay so like a couple weeks before maybe like three weeks before i was trying to like not jack off sure not not watch porn for sure and and not jack off which is tough yes uh because i you know i was trying to i was trying to boost my energy um and so i've been trying and you know i i think i think there's this thing when you when you

when you like stop jacking off and you're like you like in your mind you're like it's bad for me then every time you do it after that mindset, you feel immense shame. You're like, all right, well, this next day is going to be rough. I'll build up more jizz for the day after that, and then I'll be good to go. It's just been this constant battle of trying to figure out ways to not drill myself. I was just talking about what you were talking about. The idea that once you tell yourself, once you convince yourself that something you're doing is bad for you,

it's really hard to go back to that thing. Cause like, like that's like me with Adderall or with like webcam porn. It's like, I have, I have in my soul, I believe that's bad for me. So if I go to do it again, I feel really shitty about myself. You should not feel shitty about jacking off right now. And let this be, dude, quarantine, all this shit, it's getting taken down by like 2000%. Whatever you need to get through this quarantine, do it.

If you got to jack off eight times a day, as long as you're not going outside and telling people, I'm all for it, dude. Jack off your fucking a fucking cop. Just take it to the drill factory. Yeah, dude. It doesn't make me feel good, though. Well, then, you know, if it's not working for you, stop. But I know me, my numbers are –

You did skyrocketing. I'm putting up ridiculous numbers right now. Yeah, I mean, it slowed down a little bit because it stopped doing the trick. But for a while there, I was like, man, it slowed down a little bit because it stopped doing the trick. But for a while there, I was like, man, these are some of the best drill sessions I've ever had. Yeah. Yeah. I think when you – this is going to be gross.

I don't know if you want this in the pod. But when you purposely try to not jizz and then you end up jizzing it feels much better yeah yeah dude little tease and denial bro that's what we call it i thought i was dipping into some tantra i was like is this what tantra is yeah your little bdsm you guys still there i can't hear you aaron yeah classic you don't hear that cue. Yeah. I asked if you've been unleashing loads. Did that come through? No, until now. I have a wife, so yes. Nice. Dude, is it difficult being –

I've heard like – I've seen a lot of memes about being married and loving the time of quarantine. Is it more difficult than in the regular world? Yes. Cause I could leave before. Yeah. Cause absence does make the heart grow fonder and you get your,

you're on top of each other for all of your meals and all of the stuff that you do on your own and kind of feel autonomous about. And then all of a sudden you have someone else's opinion or judgment. Yeah. I felt that too. Like sometimes at night, cause like, I'll feel good, you know, during the day and that at night, it's sort of when my mind will spin, I'll be like, what am I doing? But, but then I'm like, I'm much happier that I'm alone because I just, if I were with someone like all day, I mean, I would lose it.

Yeah. Yeah. It is tough. That's what's nice is that like all the, my relationships right now are virtual. Yeah. There's not, you can just take a couple hour break and not have to see the face in your face all the time. Yeah. yeah yeah i messaged all my exes bro i'm talking back to like seven i just said i was like hope you're well i hope your family's all right i'm sorry i'm a piece of shit if i was ever a piece of shit i just don't want

any bad juju out there and then one of them's a comedian and of course she writes a tweet about it every time i reach back out it's a fucking tweet about it. Yeah. Can I look it up? Yeah. I'm like, how about you take the high road, sweetie? Yeah. I gotta check this shit out. That's how I'm patronizing Aaron? No. Yeah. I was never in that situation.

Yeah. It's like, and I don't follow her because it'd be too painful, you know, to like, you know, we don't follow each other. But Maurice, he's like, just see her tweet about you. I'm like, oh, and I don't follow her because it'd be too painful, you know, to like, you know, if we don't follow each other. But Maurice, he's like, did you see her tweet about you? I'm like, no, what'd she say? He's like, she said this. I'm like, oh, did it do well? He's like, yeah, she's killing it.

I was like, all right. Oh, man. I'll find out later. You know which one I'm talking i'm talking about the i know the blonde curly haired one yeah i just can't find the tweet um oh what else have i been doing i'm trying to work out as much as i can dude me too bro i'm more shredded than i've been in a while. Yeah? Nice. Yeah, your arms look good. I've been fucking getting after it, dude.

Yeah, I've been going on runs. I've been sprinting. Going on sprints. That's nice. Jack rope. I've been just getting a rope. How many minutes you up? How long can you do a set for?

I've been doing 10 minutes, one minute on one minute off okay that's nice what about you if i got no shoe on i can do five minutes straight and then but i'm not i'm not going very fast like watch me or like this guy learned how to jump rope like three months ago even though i've been doing it for years and then if i'm wearing shoes i can do like four minutes on my first set and then i slow down a little bit. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's a big difference. Yeah. But it's probably make my calves pop more if I wear those shoes.

Yeah. Oh, dude, I had kind of a rough start to the quarantine because I was like boozing on like a Saturday night, and then I just boozed by myself for like two days. Yeah, bro. And then the day after I turn on the news, I'm like, oh, fuck. Because it just affects me so much where I'm just like, even without a pandemic, I already, if I'm hungover,

I'll have like this impending doom scenario in my head. And then you turn on the news and it's like actual doom. You know, Sanjay Gupta's like doom is coming. And you're like, oh, fuck. It just compounds. I do wonder about that stuff when they're like, yeah, LA is going to be New York in a couple of weeks. I'm like, uh, all right.

Honestly, I don't see that happening. We live so much differently. Yeah. They have, like, subways. They live on top of each other. We're much more spread out, isolated. We're in cars. We don't have elevators.

We have elevators. But not, like, they're not how the majority of us get out of our buildings i mean when you're in new york you you like you step out into the street you're like bumping into people non-stop and they're not really like that yeah so dude what about vids you've been you've been doing a lot of uh uh what do you guys call it bagging you and kevin Doing a lot of, what do you guys call it, bagging? You and Kevin? Yeah, I figured we could have him on to chat about it.

Yeah, we've been going on Halo and just bagging people. It's getting kind of old at the moment, don't tell Kevin, because he loves it so much. I feel bad. I like Call of Duty more than Halo, and I don't know how to like, this is the first time I'm playing it. I agree with you. I do like Call of Duty more than Halo, and I don't know how to, like... I agree with you. I do like Call of Duty more. I can only play for, like,

45 minutes or less. Exactly. Perfect. I've been playing with some Stokers, though. That's been fun. Oh, that's awesome. I've been playing with Cooter, and then this kid Luke from Ohio. And some others have reached out, so I to um play with them but uh

yeah Gamertag is deepchad44 mine is JT is fired up yours is hilarious and dude the thing I don't like about Halo is that the like the

scope button should be the left trigger and it's the right thumb yeah i think that's wrong uh like layout well yeah when i switch to halo it's i always fuck it up i start throwing grenades because i'm trying to aim yeah dude i've been life-solving my controller so much i broke this button and my right bumper and left bumper yeah so if like i call duty i have to empty the entire clip every time to reload yeah it's hopefully i'm like i've tried to be optimistic i'm like this will make me a better player in the long run i can't update any of my guns and i'm just i'm in my kd ratio i'm just getting wailed on but it's nice to be gaming again after a long

a long hiatus yeah How do you do at freaking Call of Duty? Are you able to play or do you just get destroyed? I do have pretty slow reflexes, but they're getting better. I do this thing when I see the enemy, I'll always stay there for two seconds kind of curiously before I pull out my

gun and shoot. But I've gotten better at shooting. When I put my trigger on, when I put my, what do they call it? Your scope? Your eyepiece or whatever. Your scope? Yeah, your scope. What is it called?

Crosshairs. Crosshairs. Thank you so much. I get my crosshairs on you. Like, now I pull the trigger until you're dead quote that for a while there i was but a game is like 13 goals 10 deaths yeah and and and another thing wrong you can't chase people that you want to shoot once you start chasing a guy to kill him you get crossfired from where else like

if a guy runs out of your vision let him go it's like the unicorn that was not your unicorn wait for the one that sits in front of you yeah i need to learn that i'm pretty bad still i just i just i just charge into the action and shoot i love that and i just get destroyed but i try to bag dudes as much as i can just to like like, hurt their morale a little bit. I feel like that's, you know, I'll get, like, five kills, at least 20 bags. T-bagging, like, at least 20 dudes. So at least I can hurt their spirits a little bit more than their score. Yeah, Aaron, so do you know what Chad's talking about?

I'm putting it together in my head, like, that you. Yeah, but you explain it. He's, like, killing. So it looks like he's bagging them yeah that's hilarious we started doing it in Halo the Schmoll and I and you know we

we'd get like two kills but we'd teabag him at least 30 times and then talk shit should we put Kevin on first shit should we get kevin on first to talk about that yeah yeah i'll invite him did you have any impulses to like stock up on cash or buy a gun uh definitely to buy a gun i realized like my politics it really made me because you know i consider myself like a good lib i I'm like, no, we got to get rid of, I mean, I've always felt like we got to,

it didn't change my gun policies too much. Cause I just think we should get rid of assault rifles and handguns. I think we should leave hunting rifles and leave shotguns. Cause I think you can defend your home with a shotgun, although it's kind of big, but, uh, and it's hard to kill a ton of people with weapons that aren't semi-automatic or automatic. But, uh, but then when we were at Costco that night, after we went to the Pasadena,

because so we went to a city council meeting on March 12th, was it? I think 11th. And it was the day the world changed. Tom Hanks got Corona, Rudy Gobert got it, the NBA ended their season, and the person leading the city council meeting cried. And then we came out of there, the big project we were working on,

we realized was not going to be feasible to make in these next couple months. And then the next thought after all that was, I need to get a fucking gun. Citizens should be able to have guns. We should be able to protect ourselves. There were lines out the doors at all the ones in Burbank by the studio really yeah

like they even had dividers so people could social distance while buying guns wow my orange county friends are hilarious they're all like dude we need to stockpile on guns i'm like the median income here is like 200 like is is the orthopedist who lives next door going to like go purge on my mom? I don't think so. Yeah. It's interesting. I like still, even in these times, I think maybe it's just like extreme naivete, but I just still don't. I was like, I need to get hot dogs and video game headphones.

You're a genius. That's exactly my place, dude. My brothers bought guns. They stocked up on cash. And I'm like, I got Call of Duty. Well, my wife and I watched Lord of the Rings and I was checking Amazon and just like,

oh, swords are like 50 bucks now. Really? Get a fully battle ready battle ready katana 50 bucks dude i can picture you your wife like you're holding her back with this left arm you're like stay back honey the dog the dog comes out first grabs the guy's wrist and then you come in with the sword and just straight through the sternum yeah that's what i'm talking about that would be hilarious to just come out during the apocalypse of the sword and just straight through the sternum. Yeah. That's what I'm talking about. That would be hilarious to just come out during the apocalypse of the sword. Yeah.

I have two already. So what kind? I have the sword of the King from Lord of the Rings. And then I haven't. Yeah. And then I have another katana. Just. It's kind of lame though.

It's dull. Oh really? Can you sharpen it? I'm sure I could, but I'm battle ready. Is Kevo available or should we move on? I tried to send an email. I said I didn't get it, so I tried to resend it. Aaron, would you be able to try sending it it's kevin.fard at gmail oh there he is

schmoldaddy dude you come on strong dude you look good schmoldaddy dude I love the video game headphones Kevin can you hear us he's connecting the audio

there we go should be able to can you hear me yeah oh epic how's the bagger doing oh Garf what up nice what's going on have you guys started yet are you yeah we're rolling oh okay what's going on

i was just bagging earlier were you yeah i was bagging all day got some pretty good bags in how many are you averaging a day i would have to say in the hundreds yeah what how so how's so for those who don't know kevin and i and sometimes jt have been or jt do you want to be included in the bag squad or no i don't think he's in the bag squad i haven't witnessed him bag like included you what yeah i actually don't think i've bagged anyone yet but i'd still like to be as at least a friend of the baggers yeah so so kevin and i during these this uh pandemic we've been uh gone halo and just tea bagging dudes and uh i think we've you know broken a of spirits, and I'm pretty proud of it.

So, okay. They say in the – I think this has turned everybody – or I've reverted back into, like, a 12-year-old, and I'm playing video games, and I'm bagging, and I'm loving it. There's nothing better when you kill somebody in the game and you just dip their nuts on it. There there's nothing no guy doesn't like that tell me uh i've never met a man who doesn't like a good bag just just right in the mouth yeah the best two on twos and then uh you know they'll always be way better than us they'll get like 40 kills each we'll get like six

but we'll just dominate them with the bags yeah and uh you can tell they're hurt dude i'm bagging all night you know and then the other benefit is in in my apartment building everybody probably thinks i'm a total badass because they just hear me all fucking night, all night just going, oh yeah, take that bag. Oh yeah, take that bag. So they probably think I got a lady in here who I'm bagging all night. Win-win. You guys bag? Who else are we?

That's Aaron. Aaron? Hey, how's it going? What's up? You bag? I have not bagged. You got how's it going? What's up? You bagged? I have not bagged. You got to try it, buddy. Nothing better.

It's exhilarating. Yeah, JT is not a bagger. It's not an insult. It's just you can tell because we've been bagging every day, every night bagging, and we've been having to beg this guy to bag. I didn't know how to tell you. I'm not huge on Halo. I like Call of Duty more.

Yeah, I tried Call of Duty, but it's too intense. I got like PTSD from it. It's like you're in war. I don't need that. And everybody's just killing you. Everybody's too good. I like Halo. I can just get in there, get my bags in and get out. I don't have to go to a whole,

a whole war zone with a huge map. And I got to run 50 miles to bag. And if I get killed, I get kicked out. I just want to die. I just want to bag. That's all I want to do. You're a purist. Yeah. When did you discover bagging? when did you discover bagging? I knew about bagging earlier, but Chad was, I think Chad did the reintroduction because when we started playing,

he's all, he's all, dude, we got to bag these guys. And then it just came back to me. Yeah. Well, you didn't, you didn't realize how to do it for a while. You just watched. I hadn't bagged in probably a decade. I haven't bagged in a decade. It left me. But when he brought it back in, I knew it was inside me the whole time.

I'm a bagger. Well, sometimes we don't. Yeah, sometimes both of us get on the guy's head, and we both bag him at the same time. We'll release some videos soon we're trying to figure out um yeah how to live stream it on twitch uh but apparently twitch you have to be what's called a partner on twitch to live stream with multiple people and i was looking into how to become a partner. And we basically, for the next like three years, me and Chad would have to just be bagging 24 seven.

Yeah. Well, well, Stokers, uh, if anyone knows how to work Twitch better, hit us up. Uh,

cause we're going to start twitching our bag sessions or we're trying to, we just can't figure out how to twitch our bag. Yeah. If anybody knows how to get me and chad on twitch so everybody can participate in our bags yeah my handle is chad goes deep 444 so uh we'll figure it out and if anyone can help us streamline it that'd be dank yeah so if you're ever playing with uh chad no, no. Your is, is deep Chad. That's my gamer. But my Twitch is Chad goes deep.

Oh, okay. Okay. All right. I don't know this kind of speak. I just got into these games recently, but yeah, dude, my bag is, my bag is loose. Do you guys have bagger nicknames? like are you like legend of bad vans no we're the we're the bagger bros but um i i'm lieutenant colonel bag hammer and i'm felicity bagwell yeah lieutenant bat lieutenant bag hammer reporting here i've had a lot of bags in my day i remember my first bag 20 years ago. Sometimes I'll be like looking through the sniper rifle and the scope and I'll be like looking around for someone.

I'll just stumble upon Kevin just bagging a dude hard. There's nothing better. I think I'm going to write a screenplay about it. When you go into bagging, you go onto YouTube, and the woman in the house right now is closing the door because I'm talking about bagging too loud. Actually, bagging here, before we get into bagging, is actually causing a rift in my relationship.

Bagging is coming in between. She's just like, are you bagging again tonight? And I go, of course I'm bagging tonight. And it's every night she's getting resentful. Right. I lost my train of thought there. I just, you know, she closed the door on me because apparently I'm talking about bagging too loud again, but I'll talk. Because apparently I'm talking about bagging too loud again. But I'll talk. I think you just got to tell her, like, babe, you know, me being a bagger makes me a better husband.

I told her, you know, you knew I was a bagger when you got into this. You know, even though I wasn't technically bagging, I was a bagger. You could tell. I always knew you had it in you. Yeah. I mean, I'm obsessed with bagging right now. It's the only thing I have going for me right now. We're locked in.

I'm sticking with bagging. Chad's bagging. Nobody else seems to want to get in on the bag train. But if anybody wants to join us, come join us. You guys have headsets? Can you guys talk to one another while you play? Yeah, I'm wearing my bagging headset right now. Yeah, I'll go get mine.

Yeah, put on your, this is the headset. I thought you said you ordered one. I did, and then it's, I can't figure out how to work it. I'm so like illiterate with just technology. You just plug it into the. Is that it? You just plug it into the controller. Oh, into the controller.

Yeah. Yeah. Oh, I plugged it into the Xbox. No, in the controller. Looks good. Wow, Garf looks... Kevin's showing... For those of you who were just listening to the audio, Kevin's got his beautiful...

Is that a Shih Tzu? Yeah. He's got his beautiful Shih Tzu up in the frame. Yeah, I bagged Garf the other day. She got upset. You bagged Garf in real life? Yeah, I bagged him in real life. I've been bagging things around the house practicing.

But with your shorts on, right? Yeah, I didn't have my bag out. You know, you don't have to. What are you guys talking about? We've just been chilling. We've just been talking about the quarantine, how long it's going to go, how it's affected us, and our hopes and fears, basically. You know what my thoughts on the quarantine are? What?

It's really showing, um, it's really showing who's a man and it's really showing who the real men out there because of the beat, because not because of that, because of the beards. Okay. Oh, wow. Because there's no excuse now. You have no excuse not to grow your man your beard out right yeah you don't have to go to work you're working from home and now we're seeing who has it and who doesn't yeah you got a good one yeah your mustache is strong yeah this is like this is the two weeks this is just quarantine beard. You see that? Yeah.

Looks good. If you wanted to go to war in Call of Duty or something, or just in real war, do you want the guy with the beards, or do you want a guy that can't grow a beard? Guy with a beard. Exactly. So those are my thoughts on the quarantine. How are you hanging in there?

I'm doing good dude My mom hasn't been feeling well So I'm a little bit worried about her But hopefully she's okay Well everybody right now Feels like they have the coronavirus I feel Yeah she had a cold and some body pains But she's doing alright

I've been feeling good I've been more productive lately And Yeah I was telling Chad It just makes you feel close to everybody like me and amir we talk like every day now you know like just like that's you feeling more productive going on instagram live and talking to somebody on the phone yeah all right dude instagram live is fun dude have you tried it you know i don't think i have enough people that want to listen to me Instagram.

I'm good enough not live. What does that mean? I'm not there yet. What do you mean? I don't need two people watching me talk for an hour. Let's just be honest here. Should I do it? Will you watch the whole hour?

No, not the whole hour, but i'll dip in for a second we could instagram live our bagging yeah well i mean how do we do that though we'd have to position our phone yeah it would just be the bags but it would just be like very poor quality yeah we got to figure there has to be like a tech person out there who can figure this out yeah for us because we want to share it. We want to share it with you guys. It's noble. Love you, dude.

All right. See you later. Warm up the bag. Wait, hold on. We're bagging tonight, right? Maybe in an hour? Yeah. All right.

All right. Well, Kevin. Bag on. Bye, Kevin. maybe in an hour yeah alright well Kevin bang on bye Kevin okay did you see Joe's haircut dude it looks great pretty wild dude did you see it Aaron

yeah yeah it does look great it's that corona dude the corona is making us all make big big choices big swings dude that's what i was thinking too today i was like driving and i was like every big choice i didn't make that i was like oh i'll put it off like getting a dog or like you know trying to date somebody or or i don't know like a video i wanted to make it's like and i was like no it's not the right time. It's like, that is the worst thinking in the world. Like the timing's not right. Like just go, just go big, make big mistakes and just go ahead. Cause you don't know when you're going to get

another opportunity. Just go. Yeah. I was, uh, I was, uh, I was thinking about fostering. Yeah. You were talking about that, dude. So if you foster it, you don't have to keep it. Right. Yeah. But I just, I feel like I'd get attached so easily unless it was like a you know with shitting all over the place or something or just a bad dog but i just you know i often it's rare that i find bad dogs dude you're gonna love that dog when it shits all over the place you might no one shits all over the place like you do rodolfo i know i i think i'd fall in love with any dog dude get a dog go i'm all green lights go baby get a dog yeah and now it's a good time to foster because you know they um i think more dogs are getting put to sleep

yeah dude you're helping you're saving a life dude, the way you talk about Caroline's dog, like. Oh, it's the best. Yeah, you love it so much. Yeah. And you're just, you're a, no, you're a dad. You're that dog's dad. Rosie's dad? Yeah, but you're not like the biological father. You're the biological father of the dog you fostered.

I'm the weird stepdad. Yeah. Cool stepdad. Yeah, cool stepdad yeah cool stepdad now rosie and i we have a good bond i saw her i saw her uh recently and she was just uh she was pumped whenever she comes to my place she's fired up so i know it's a good connection that's awesome um but i just i'm so mobile usually so that's my only but I guess it going back to what you're saying you just gotta you can figure it out just just do it yeah just do it strider I got strider coming up my dogs that are in the building oh dude we got Aaron on the legend too what up yeah

visual appearance. Yeah, this is Stuckers. They're intro to Aaron. These, dude. What's crapping, boys? I like the tunes, dude. Yeah, what is that music? Is that my music?

I think it's you, dude. Really? I like the tunes. Oh, got a website bro i was on twitch do you have it more figured out now nah dude dude clearly no way dude i uh i literally had no idea what that was i thought you guys were like playing some music. I was stepping into a nice little party right there. I was like, all right, here we go, dude.

That's what we should do. That would be cool. Dude, we should do a rager via Zoom and just invite all the stokers. That's what I'm saying, dude. We got to get on there and just do a social, a physical distancing, dude. Not social, physical distancing rager, dude. Dude, that's a smart way to play with the language my friend dude my freaking gf hit me up with that dude the other day i kind of opened my dome dude she's like look we're social beings we gotta freaking stay dialed in

and uh you know we're just and we've been doing a good job of that i've had uh some dang facetime calls with my dogs recently been stepping it up on FaceTime, dude. Dude, it's huge. Before the Q-team, everyone had friends that used FaceTime. You're like, whoa, dude, come on, come on, come on. But now it's like, let's go. We're definitely the luckiest quarantine in history. No question. What'd you say?

We're like the luckiest quarantine in history. Oh, yeah. Like what we do hasn't really been i mean what some stuff we've done has been really impacted but like but we can still do what we do yeah no i was thinking about that like i was talking with our buddy nick um last week you know we're when this when it started getting serious, we were like, let's just shut everything down. You know, why not just do that?

And then, but I was like, oh, we come from such a privileged position to be able to, like, say something like that. Yeah. You know what I mean? Like, we don't have to, I mean, we did stop our project, but we don't have to shut down like a business and then just be in i i can't imagine the anxiety if you have if you have a small business and you know you just can't run it right now it's crazy i totally agree i think i think what it has to be honestly is like

i think rich people have to step up and like they have to come up with solutions for people who are struggling but i mean you know easier said than done but we can make moves i mean dude i was thinking about this i was just like going through the hypotheticals in my dome you know as i'm sitting in and enjoying a nice little adult beverage dude what up whiskey whiskey and i'm like dude there's somewhat of a there's not really a template for like this you know what I mean but there's like a template for wartime stuff for world war ii or all those type of stuff but it's like do you create like a wartime economy because that creates tons of jobs and right now there's no jobs so it's like you a ton of legends are like making making surgical masks and I'm like

that's not like building b-17s you know it's not the same thing but like maybe there's innovative ways that i don't know about that is above my dome of like are there jobs we can create that you know can we go build some respirators or like uh are there services we can do to you know do something like i don't know i don't know well it's hard it's hard because we can't really do large-scale production because of the proximity problem. Yeah. Yeah. And so it's like,

it probably takes what, like 20 people to build a plane. Totally. And dude, JT, the unmentioned problem, dude, the robot problem,

bro. What do you mean? Just, they're taking our jobs, dude. It's like perfect. It's yeah. Like an automatic,

an automated workforce is perfect right now. Just have the robots build all the mass. It's what we need. I know. It's so true. It's yeah. Like an automated workforce is perfect right now. Just have the robots build all the mass. It's what we need. I know. It's so true. Dude. Guys, seeing all these video conferencing apps,

switching cameras automatically when someone talks, I'm like, whoa, that's my job. I'm there for Aaron. No, no, no,

no, no, no, no. Aaron, they don't have the feel. They don't have the nuance, right? Aaron, they don't have the feel. They don't have the nuance. Right.

Aaron, they don't have the understanding of when I come on the pod and I slip you with something nice and blue, a nice little Ben Franklin blue of say, you know, cut to the moneymaker, Aaron. Cut to the moneymaker. It's like in stealth when Josh Lucas is like, oh yeah, it's a robot plane, but doesn't understand like when it's more important to save lives and that kind of judgment. I mean, that's what you're doing behind the sticks when you're cutting a hundred percent aaron you are wait what are you saying chad can you imagine if it was a robot

working the audio no i mean aaron you bring the flavor town dude like yeah i mean you do it right you're like aaron you know in pacific rim when there's like the stream when you have that like that's what we've got going on dude it's like what is that called yeah what do they call that it's like the uh like that to be in vibe with their kaiju yeah let me i'm gonna look it up but aaron also i think the only thing you and the robot would have in common is that you both don't understand in and out fries yeah fries? Yeah, in-and-out fries are dank, Aaron. Real potatoes, dude. I mean, real potatoes, great.

But Five Guys does something with them. Are you getting Cajun or regular at Five Guys? I'm doing regular. Good. Okay, good. You're not doing Cajun? I can't do spicy that well. You're not a spicy guy?

It doesn't settle in with me. You like buffalo wings? No. Yeah. I can't do spicy that well. You're not a spicy guy? It doesn't settle in with me. You like buffalo wings? No. Yeah. I can't do it. I'm not a big wings guy. Chad, are you a big wings guy? I'm a huge buffalo guy, yeah.

Really? Are you dipping it in lamb? I don't like the process of eating wings. It's just like such a mess. Yeah. But I do like buffalo sauce, and I will throw it on anything. I said, I said,

someone asked me the other day, barbecue or Buffalo. And I was embarrassed to say barbecue, but that's where I don't know. Always barbecue. Although dude, I'll tell you right now, I forget where I heard this distinction,

but you know, SoCal, which we love, we would, we, what we conceive as barbecuing is actually grilling because we're doing it quickly. Barbecuing is more like a slow cooking type process that goes over a long time. We're grilling out.

We're not really barbecuing even though we say barbecuing. And we're throwing the sauce on there. So it's somewhat of a, I suppose, I don't know. Like jet skis are wave runners. Exactly. 100%. Exactly right. People think they're jet skiing.

You're wave runnering. Correct. 100% correct. So if you go to McDonald's and you get nuggets, what sauce are you getting? Honey. Honey. Honey. Buffalo.

I'm getting two buffalo. Whoa. I'm getting all buffalo. Buffalo would be my third. Honey. Buffalo. I'm getting two buffalo. Whoa. I'm getting all buffalo. Buffalo would be my third. Really? Wait a second. Barbecue? Barbecue.

I'm getting buffalo and barbecue. Actually, it'd probably be my fourth, dude, because ketchup. Whoa. I mean, I love McDonald's ketchup. They do something to that ketchup. Did you guys see the movie The Founder no I've never heard about that dude I had a dream about Michael Keaton the other night

oh really and I didn't even see Birdman but it was like a Birdman dream it was like I don't even know it was that scene of like being outside the theater when he was like in the robe you know he like couldn't get outside the theater or something like that. It was weird.

Damn. Yeah. I've been drinking this, uh, melatonin drink and it gives you lucid dreams. So crazy dreams every night. And, and not really like usually I have good dreams,

but these are just like, but they're just like weird. Like I had one where I like Justin Bieber was in my apartment and we had like a misunderstanding about whose jewel was whose. And then, uh, I forget. Oh,

and I had another one that was on love is blind. And, uh, we were, but we were like pranking them, but I went too far and everyone on Love is Blind

is like dude you're a fucking asshole bro like that was not cool and I was like oh I'm sorry to the cast damn

was it a new cast or was it the cast we're familiar with no it was the same cast like oh wow like Damien was pissed Giannina was super pissed

Jessica you know it was tough melatonin should we bring joe on and then and then we'll do get into the beefs babes and legends of the week hell yes dude yeah let's do it by the way pacific rim is called the drift the drift dude The drift. The drift, dude. Nice. The drift. Dude, Aaron, legend, bro. Exactly. Legend. Dude, I'm texting Joe right now. We're going to do a – our buddy Joe Pelazon, who – you know what? I'm going to save it for Legend of the Week.

But Joe and I – Joe Morisi and I are going to do a virtual lunch, dude. He door dashed me some food. We got the same thing. It was very dank. And we just had like a little lunch on FaceTime or Zoom or whatever app. It's kind of nice. You and Joe Marisi? Me and Joe Pelazon. But tomorrow, Joe Marisi and I

are going to do it. I think we're going to get Dave's hot chicken. He's never had it. They've got like Reaper, dude. Because they use like Reaper peppers. And they have a huge fat like a fat stack of papers that they make you sign before you eat it they're like this stuff could like end you you better sign this paper before you eat it so spicy right big song and dance yeah exactly it's good marketing yeah it's smart can't wait to get marisa on here dude was my entrance the worst entrance of all time with

that stupid fucking twitch song playing no is it charming are you kidding me yeah you're like uh q grant like when you're bumbling you're like i want to kiss you i love that dude dude my gf had never seen the movie nine months oh great great bro we watched that during Q-Teen. Fucking dank movie, dude. The scene in the store with the Babar dinosaur, you know? Oh, yeah. Dude, all the time. Tom Arnold's great. Dude, I love movies.

Dude, True Lies. Bro, Tom, dude, what's the movie, Carpool? Dude, Tom Arnold crushes, dude. Tom Arnold's hilarious, dude. Yeah. I've valeted his car many times. Whoa. No. His stand-up, though. Tom Arnold's hilarious, dude. Yeah. I've valeted his car many times. Whoa, Joe. His stand-up, though.

His stand-up. Ooh. Yeah. Ooh. Oh, there we go. Dude, he's one of these things away from just, like, calling it quits. Like Christopher Titus things. Joe, what up, dog?

When you get that mic, you're now an orator. Dude, correct. Yeah. Maniscalco could do an orator you're correct yeah dude maniscalco could do it though maniscalco maniscalco could do it i'm sure that guys we're talking about the difference for those of you only listening uh not watching we're talking about the difference when you get away from the microphone and you get the what would you call that like the headpiece microphone headset yeah the headset like the uh you know, Xbox Live headset style mic. Yeah, like the TikTok. Yeah. I should do this on my computer.

I can't get all you guys in the same screen. Maurice, do you have a computer? If you change it to gallery view, you might have a better. Oh, Joe's on the phone. Yeah, I'm doing it from my phone. Maurice, I love your dome, dude. I love the dome. I don't know.

I'm kind of feeling kind of anxious about it. Why? You look jacked. I don't know. It feels like a big change. I don't know if we're ready for it. Dude, I think you've been,

I mean, I think people love it. You were born ready. Dude, if we weren't physical distancing right now, dude, you know, there'd be a 42-year-old woman just begging to get a porterhouse physical distancing right now dude uh you know there'd be a 42 year old woman just begging to get a porterhouse with you right now dude that is true i think you look five years younger and five years older at the same time that's gold jo Joe. Yeah.

What's up, dude? How are you doing? Pretty good. I'm just watching Fargo. The show or the movie? The movie. Oh, baby. Joe, talk about Michael Clayton.

So you've been watching Michael Clayton nonstop, right? Yeah. Yeah. I want to be a fixer myself, I think. You look like a fixer right now. Yeah, I mean, yeah, that's a great movie. I think it's Clooney's best work by far. It's just kind of a brilliant movie all around.

And we were talking yesterday about what do the horses mean? when he gets out of the car and he goes to look at the horses, the three horses right before his car gets blown up. Right. What do they represent? Is it freedom? Is it him and his three brothers? Yeah.

That's what you were saying when you looked it up. Joe with the hammer, dude. No, I'm not saying, I didn't know. I didn't know dude. No, I'm not saying. I didn't know. I want to. I didn't know either.

No, there's a lot of symbolism in that movie, dude. It's a dank-ass movie, dude. You could teach a whole course on that movie. Yeah, it's a good movie. It's a good name for a movie. You couldn't call it. Wait, you know, JT had a great quote one time. One time we were at a, um in our back in san juan

capistrano we were at a rodeo and i there was a bunch of like dads with their kids on their shoulders and i put jt on my shoulders to see the horses and then uh i remember afterwards it was a nice moment he was like uh there's nothing more beautiful than seeing horses run on film yeah yeah you know i took that from my dad's, I was at a ranch one time and these eight wild horses were running. Really?

Yeah, and my dad's friend turned to me and he said, that gives me a boner. Dude, that would give me a boner. Here, I'm going to, I got my computer going. I'm going to join from the computer.

I'll be right back. Yeah, I swear to God, I didn't know Joe had a computer. I've never seen him with a computer. This is brand new to me. I'll be right back. I swear to God, I didn't know Joe had a computer. I've never seen him with a computer. This is brand new to me. I'm shocked. Joe's hooking up. Remember those

blue cube Macs from the early 2000s? iMac. Only freshmen in sororities had those Macs. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, dude. That's gold yeah dude i think horse is my favorite animal dude that's a great animal to love i mean it's a great they're intelligent

they're smart they're fucking jacked they run fast i mean a horse is basically just like a jacked fast cow like we'd be eating them if it weren't so fucking brilliant and when you do when you put your hand on it and you feel its heart beating you know what i mean like after it went for a run or something and you just feel the warm like kind of fur that they got it's just i don't know i think it says it all how do you measure a horse you measure it in hands it's a it's an animal meant to be to be uh interacted with you know what i mean they want to be touched yeah there's sensitivity to when you're uh when you're sitting on them how they can sense like every single body they can pretty much according to my dad i but like when you're riding a horse they can pretty

much read your mind because they can read your body language so well yeah anytime you shift your weight a little bit it'll it knows what you want to do basically yeah sometimes you think go left and it'll go left because they have subtle perception it feels almost telepathic sometimes yeah i found out i was a beta male when i was on a horse dude i was on like a nice bougie breakfast ride one time yeah i was like dude this animal it is in control of me right now sure i have the reins but it really has the reins like dude that's like it's i think it's like good sex dude you you you don't pretend to be more in control than you are it's it's a it's a it's it's two people or a horse and a person vibing together you know what i mean i think you had

more control than you were letting the name go you were letting nature yeah exactly it's just primal that's the beauty of it dude i forget who said this but one time someone was like describe the best sexual experience you've ever had i bet it's not the orgasm and it's like it's just being in unison being there and vibing and the giving the take ah there has to be some vulnerability in there and some and some lack of control yeah dude i'm about to go wake my gf up but she's got a conference call in the morning so you got a horse well you're letting that horse have some control oh of course or letting me feel like i'm in control and then that's really the control you know what i mean i mean come on strider how's the qt and romance been it's been good dude i mean it's it's chill dude i've definitely been stepping into the

drill factory a lot um you know my dude she's pretty stressed out dude she's she's pretty stressed out and she's working dude she's still working during these times dude freaking you know she's straight up uh getting stuff done so uh yeah dude i mean it's been um it's definitely been nice but at the same time it's been more of a practice of self-love maybe maybe this horse talk will you'll bring a new presence into the room it's undeniable it's definitely undeniable even uh you know even the um stuff that they've been putting out on like uh the going deep um podcast page on instagram like just us talking about our our sick fantasies you know that was a nice little um a nice little uh i guess you could say uh sort of palette teaser for me and my gif it was nice hearing about that ruined world

and then when joe just says slapping titties around gold. Wait, dude, I think, I think a way to maybe perk that part of the, of the situation up in the bedroom, play a movie with a strong female protagonist who likes to ride horses. Wild hearts can't be broken. Wild hearts can't be broken. Was that what you were thinking? Great fucking movie.

Aaron, I can see Aaron scratching his neck. Aaron, that means you know that movie, dude. No, I've actually never heard of it. What? It's about a lady, this fucking girl. She fucking jumps on a fucking horse off a fucking diving board that's like 10 stories in the fucking air, and she lands

in a fucking pool. Bro, that sounds awesome. Bro, she's fucking blind. She's fucking blind, dude. She's fucking blind she's fucking blind dude eyes she goes fucking blind this girl no she fucking feels the animal dude the animal fucking feels her dude they fucking dive into the pool people clap their hands dude but really what it's about is the fucking bond dude in stridey baby people don't believe people don't believe she can feel the horse with no eyes but she can feel the fucking horse. Guess what? They believe their eyes when they see it, and she feels it, dude.

It's fucking Michael Clayton shit for faith, dude. When I do blow, I give it to the horse, too, and then we ride around together. We can't stop talking. If you were going to do blow with any animal from the animal kingdom, what animal are you doing? Blow with silverback gorilla. Great call. I'm just a fire call. I'm going to think more. Maybe it would make it more human.

Like it would sit there and get neurotic. Oh, interesting. That's genius. I was going to say honey badger. Cause it's like badass. I'm just like, maybe here's some of its stories. Have it embellish a little bit. You know, I would just, I Honey Badger because it's like badass. I would just like maybe hear some of its stories,

have it embellish a little bit, you know. I would just imagine me and the Honey Badger just having a drink, maybe doing a little key bump and just hearing it tell me about tales of taking out cobras, murking cobras, you know. What about you? I'd go with an ostrich. We would just run. Oh. Yeah.

We'd just chase dudes down, try and bag them. Oh, dude, you've been bagging a lot lately, haven't you? It's all I can think about. Fuck, dude. It's a bag. I mean, when's your Xbox coming in? Sometime this week? Supposedly Wednesday.

Okay. Can't wait, dude. We wait we're gonna you know we're gonna bring the bags I need you to bring your egg in baby I'm ready shake a little rust off and let's go stretch those quads stretch those hand strings

get ready to squat I love it time to bag. Joe. Joe. Yeah. What up? Yeah, I'm back on the phone.

It's not responding on the computer. Okay. Yeah, we have a little box that just says Joe. Yeah. Wait, I can see you though, Joe. I can see you, Joe. Both are on, his computer and his phone. Well, the computer should...

I mean, you can exit off. Can we exit off? I'm trying, but I can't get it to go away. If you do hide non-video... I got rid of it at least. I just did it.

That's the hog, man? Good, good. Yeah, you guys think my hair looks good, huh? You what? I was asking about your dong. Oh, yeah. Yeah, it's good. I'm telling JT, I think it looks bigger now.

For summer. Because of the haircut? Yeah. I don't know why. Less hair on the body. Everything's looking big. Nice, dude. That's good.

I love that. Why are you having clothes on? I don't know. I just feel good with no shirt, no pants on. Just being in my boxers. I wish this is how we could pod every time, but it'd be unseemly in person. Yeah, you can't do it.

I mean, you're going to put this out? Yeah, I mean, dude, it's different rules now with quarantine. I'm not as afraid to be a little bit out there. I love it. I think it's going to be a hit. I don't even think that's your intention, but I think it's just so natural, so innate, it's going to be fire. Yeah.

Look at that chest lettuce, baby. I don't mean this in an insulting way, but you've got a chest like Putin. Oh, thank you, dude. Oh, dude. Yeah. Like, you know, when he's on. Oh, thank you. Oh, dude. Yeah. Like, you know, when he's on that horse, I mean, he looks powerful. He's a tough dude. I mean, he scores like 60 goals every game he plays in hockey.

Yeah, dude. They just let him score. They let him score all those goals. It's so funny, dude. Wait, what is this? What is this? Vladimir Putin plays against like pro hockey teams, and because he's, you know, will probably put them in work camps, they let him score, like, 40 goals. No way.

Yeah. That is pure gold, dude. You think he talks shit after? Of course, dude. He gets a little prima nocta action. He's a sick puppy, dude. Yeah. Yeah, he is. He's one of the most arrogant leaders uh should we get into our babes beefs and legends

yeah yeah dude chat who is your beef of the week uh my beef of the week is this um this uh so there's this thing at this thing i've listened to about four ago sleep sync tuition and it's just this ambient 3D noise that relaxes your brain. They say it increases your intuition. I don't know, but I have been feeling more intuitive. Anyways, I watched

Contagion the night we went to that Calabasas City Council meeting and then we went home. I watched Contagion. I don't know why. I can't watch it right now. It'll scare me too much. went to that Calabasas city council meeting and then we went home. Yeah. I watched contagion. I don't know why. Dude,

I can't watch it right now. It'll scare me. It was so similar to what's happening. I was like, I was at Caroline's watching it. They were watching it. So I didn't, I didn't choose it. And we were watching it.

I'm like, this is exactly what's happening. Except the virus is less severe. Yeah. They're idiots for watching it. I'm like, this is exactly what's happening. Except the virus is less severe. Yeah. They're idiots for watching that. Yeah. Anyways. It's trending,

dude. That's trending on all the things. Everyone's doing. Yeah. It's, it's a bad decision. And so the music, have you guys all seen it?

Yeah. Wow. I never watched it. So the music is very like creepy, like kind of like, I don't know how you describe it, but it's just like, do like do, do, do, do, do, do, do, do. It gets in your dome. And so I was freaking out because like all this stuff was happening.

It was like, it was like the doomsday days, like those first two days where we're like the NBA's got it, all that stuff. So I go to bed and I'm like, all right, I'm going to relax. I'm going to go to sleep, put on this app. I put on the app and the music was just like Contagion. And it's like in your dome, like 3D noises. And so I'm sitting in bed trying to sleep and it's just like doo-doo-doo-doo. I'm like, what the fuck, dude?

So that's my beef, dude. I just got to have beef with Synctuition for, you know, doubling down on the Contagion music. Yeah. When I was just trying to, you know, catch some Zs and forget about, you know, our worldwide pandemic. So to Synctuition, I'd just like to say, fuck you. Nice, dude.

Fuck you, Synctuition. Yeah. For sure. I realize we didn't answer listeners' questions. The pod's already super long, but maybe we'll go through our Biebs, babes and Biebs, Biebs,

babes and legends quickly. And then we'll answer some questions afterwards. Anything to keep hanging out, dude. Yes, bro. I've got nowhere to be nowhere to go. Let's do this.

Aaron, are you chill? Aaron, are you chilling? I'm fine. Yeah. Joe, what's your beef for the week?

Uh, I guess my beef for the week I guess my Beef of the week would be Hair salons not being Essential businesses Because I had to take it upon myself To cut my hair today And it took a lot out of me This is a big move

I don't know if I was ready to go here yet. But now I'm here. So I don't know. Let's see how it goes. I think you look great. You look good, dude. Thanks. Oh, Jesus Christ. Strider, what's your beef of the week?

Dude, dude, dude. Okay. Aaron, how's my audio on this? Is this good? Yeah.

All right, bro. Before I hopped on the pod, the cops came to my apartment. All right. You want to know why? Nice. Remember on the phone the other day when I was like,

Oh dude, my neighbor came over and was like, Oh, Hey, someone's putting holes in my wall or something. Yeahacio exactly bro ignacio's my beef of the week dude this guy is paranoid and he thinks that there's because he has like a weird crawl space in his um closet in the ceiling we don't until he called the cops on me and my GF thinking that we were drilling holes to spy on him in his apartment. Well, why are you guys looking at him?

Bro, no, we're not. That's what I'm saying. Why would I ever do that? So the cops came over. They asked me about this. They were like, hey, we have an understanding that you might be doing this. And I'm like, no, no, no, no. Here's the story.

Guys, come in and check on my closet i invite the cops in they check on my closet they you know put the flashlight and both of them were like if this was the alarming part dude they were like because they knew that honestly just hearing their his report they were like this guy's probably out of his mind then when they talked to me and and got a visual on my closet and saw that there were absolutely no holes because why would I be drilling holes into his closet space to spy on him? They were like,

so you can file for restraining order in this way or this way. And I was like, well, dude, is he going to do anything like violent, like blah, blah, blah. And the cop's answer was very diplomatic. He's like, well, there's always a chance of that.

Just kind of saying like broadly that could ever happen. I guess if you're walking down the street. So basically me and my GFR freaked the fuck out and we're under quarantine and so we're gonna be moving dude yeah you have to man that yeah that guy's super on health that's crazy that's insane yeah bro so that's pretty fucking gnarly. So that's my pee for the week, dude. But also, hey, WeHo Police, legends, dude. Yeah, but dude, shouldn't those cops go back to Ignacio and be like, Ignacio, we just want you to know from, I'm sorry for using his name too.

They should go back to your neighbor and just say, hey, from the bottom of our hearts, we want you to know that your neighbor is not fucking with you. And like, whatever you think, it's not him you know what i mean yeah i do want that yeah i do want them to tell him that but we had this conversation in our bedroom and based on his prior paranoia i bet he was listening so uh yeah i think it's all good yeah i mean he's spying on you so he knows you guys are being exactly dude he's spying on you and suspects you you guys are being... Exactly, dude. He's spying on you and suspects you're spying on him. Exactly.

Dude, it's just uncomfortable, dog. I don't know how I'm going to sleep. Have you seen him recently? Like a week ago. And I told JT about this on the phone. I was like, dude, I had the weirdest fucking interaction. I had the weirdest interaction. I told him about this.

But it's been a while since then so I mean if anything it's a good sign that he called the police rather than doing anything crazy so what did he he like came to your door and asked you he's like hey someone's drilling holes in my roof right or in my closet right yeah exactly no he just said my walls and I was like I assumed it was like the other outside walls I was like that sounds weird like okay um and that was it so just a new development but that's my beef that's my beef yeah stay safe man thank you dude Aaron you got a beef sure I do uh my beef is with bicyclists um usually usually LA, I'm all for like, hey, it's rough out there. There's so much traffic right on the sidewalk, dude.

Take the ticket. Save your life. But now that it's quarantine and there's nobody on the roads and everyone's walking just to get outside, get off the fucking sidewalk, dude. Like we had a dude just breeze past us yesterday. No warning, no nothing. Just like,

fuck off, dude. Like, you can see me. Yeah, I saw a biker, too, today when I was driving. I was like, still we're doing fucking bikes. Even. You inspired my beef, dude dude it's that we got motherfuckers not respecting stop signs right now while they're driving because everything's relaxed right next to my mom's place some guy comes through doing like 60 yeah stop bad man i think everyone's frustrated and pent up and

they're trying to find a way to feel in control. So they're driving with a little bit of extra testosterone. It's like, dude, chill, dude. Chill. All right. Yeah.

There was a Ferrari and a G wagon that fucking both got like totaled on Melvo's a couple of nights ago. People are driving recklessly right now. And dude, what, what could be worse than getting injured right now and then having to go to the hospital for a non Corona thing? Yeah.

You don't want to go for trauma right now in the hospital. Yeah, you're unperpetual. Yeah, I guess you go to that big ship we got in L.A. now. Yeah, what do we got? The mercy? And then there's like the comfort. Comfort, yeah, the mercy and the comfort. Chad, who's your babe of the week?

My babe of the week is the dude with the huge hog that's in every meme. Joe. This guy who's just got the huge dong. Yeah. I was just looking up.

I guess his name is Wood. That's a clean name. Unfortunately, according to this report, he passed away a few years ago. Yeah, I heard that as well. Yeah, I just wanted to honor this dude and his huge

hog. This guy's like Van Gogh, you know? Like, he didn't get to see how much the world appreciates him and his dong. Well said. So I just want to give a shout-out to Wood. Dude, thank you so much for entertaining me. You know, I've sent that meme to my family. I've sent it to countless people, and we've all had a lot of laughs

and, you know, just some good times at the expense of your huge hawk so uh i just want to thank you wood and and uh you know we all really appreciate your dong i mean dude chad pretty beautiful about you because i mean most artists are you know posthumously is when they become recognized you know in their own lifetimes are sort of tortured and not recognized. Maybe people mock them even. So pretty, yeah, I would consider him to be an artist. Yeah, but no one's mocked him. Yeah, he's like Van Gogh.

Yeah, good call. He's like the Van Gogh of huge dongs. Well, I think he was doing the torture with that cock. Yeah. It takes one to know one. It's torture. Joe would know better than anyone, dude. Yeah, dude.

Joe, who's your babe of the week? You know, I was just watching the movie Hall Pass and there's this beautiful woman, and I'm trying to use respectful words. Oh, the Starbucks, like the coffee barista?

Yeah, she's Australian. Her name's Nikki Whalen. I looked her up. She's beautiful, and she's still, like, really hot. So shout out to her. I like hot Australian chicks. Yeah. And she gets topless

in that one scene. You know, not to get derogatory here, but, you know, we're in quarantine. We're pent up. By the end of it, you're going to be like, and I want a nut on her chest not to be... Yeah, I mean, she's gorgeous. She has like a perfect tan.

Her tan's like amazing. She's just... Yeah, she's... man, I want her, you know. Her name is Nikki Whalen. She's been in a couple other things. She's from Australia. Strider, who's your baby of the week? My baby of the week's Joe. Great baby of the week fire.

Yeah, my baby of the week's got to be my GF, dude. Joe, great baby week fire. Oh yeah. My baby week's gotta be my GF dude. Because, um, did she inspire me because we did a nice, like probably, uh, two weeks ago when this stuff got crazy with the COVID, we did a nice deep clean in our apartment.

And then she's like, you strider, I think it's time to do a fricking, you know, two week, 14 day fortnight, straight up secondary deep cleaning i was not stoked and then um she's like well i don't know we gotta do it we gotta do it and so she did inspire me to freaking throw a suit on and start cleaning in my suit which made me feel dank so and she respected it she was like she didn't judge me at all she saw me putting it on she didn't even go like what are you doing she was like what what's going on you know very chill very just like what you let me know and uh i let her know i'm just trying to get amped up and it got me amped up so she's she's a

legend for uh you know withholding judgment and just respecting uh my choices to to deep clean in a frigging dank suit. Nice, dude. My update of the week is my mom. Monica Restrepo-Parr. Electric, you know. I think at times it was hard with my mom growing up because she could just take over any room. And it was, you know, everyone always loved it when she did. It's just sometimes I would be like, oh, darn. But now I realize what a privilege it is to have her show me up and just

take over because she's just a born raconteur, entertainer, social butterfly. She loves everybody. She connects with everyone. She's so generous. She cares about people a lot. And she puts up with all of my paranoia and hypochondria and she all she does it with all love and uh yeah she's just adorable she's got a great smile i i've been doing pick-ems with her she's fucking hilarious she's got hot takes like i was like mom what's better a good tan or a good mani pedi she goes good mani pedi i go why she goes i love feet and uh yeah i've just been having a good time with her. It's been so nice to spend time with her.

It's been special. And I just, yeah, I love her so much. So big up to my mom. She is my baby. It's just so late. Hell yeah, dude. Aaron, dude, are we going to meet the missus? You want to be on the podcast?

Are we going too late, Aaron? How's your dog, dude? He's right there. He's been laying here this whole time, actually, which is kind of surprising. Dude, he loves our places. Yeah, well, they're in my ears, but maybe you can hear them still. Yeah, dude, he's in my ears, but maybe you can hear them still. Yeah, dude, he's got dog ears, Aaron. He can hear all that shit, dude.

Who's your babe of the week? My babe of the week is right back there petting the dog. That's my wife. Oh, dude. All right. Good job. Yeah, I mean, today alone, she's been, like, working from home full time while I've been doing these remote records. She's watching the dog.

She's did all our laundry. It's crazy. Like, she's a quarantine star for sure. What's your wife's name? Leah. Leah. You're a legend. Leah, respect.

Oh, there she is. Hey. Hey, Leah. Leah, respect. Oh, there she is. Hey. Hey, Leah. Hi. Hi. I've heard so much about you. It's good to finally meet you. Yes, me too.

Nice to meet you. Have a good quarantine and have fun over there. Cool. Guys are legends. Chad, who is your legend of the week? Dude, my legend of the week has got to be Master Chief and his nutsack, dude. Oh, dude. Yes.

Dude, this guy has the deepest squat, can deliver teabags, and just break the spirits of so many high schoolers around this country. and just break the spirits of so many high schoolers around this country. So I've got to give a shout-out to, you know, I may not be able to rack up kills in Halo, but I can rack up bags with the help of my dog, Master Chief. So I just want to give a shout-out and, you know, you're a legend, dude. Legend. Love that, dude.

Marisi, who're a legend dude. Legend. Love that dude. Marisi, who's your legend? Uh, my legend would have to be, uh, Uber eats. I've been using them a bunch, uh,

this week, uh, getting some number 43 is delivered from Jersey. Mike's, uh, double cheeseburgers from Carney's burritos from pinches tacos. It's, it's been, uh, uh yeah it's been great and they're so fast like i've had every delivery here and like within a half hour it's been it's been great uber

yeah uber eats is really coming through for me in this quarantine that's awesome schreider who's your legend dude my legend of the week has to be Joe Pelazon, dude. Nice. Dank bro, dude. High school bro. You know, a fantasy contender, dude. And yeah, that's definitely a little jab, dude, even though I'm calling you out as a legend, Joe. And definitely, dude, he, speaking of Uber Eats, went ahead impromptu out of nowhere he goes dude what

what's your favorite sandwich from potato chips deli which he knows that i love he even consulted ujt which you are correct my favorite sandwich is the turkey at hot that onions you are correct although i did go with the chicken malanese like joisi introduced me to, which is a dank, dank, dank sandwich, like a torta. And so, yeah, bro, he had that delivered to me and my GF's place. And we did a little FaceTime lunch date with Joe and his dank GF, Brittany. And it was great, dude. It was sick, dude. We had a nice little lunch virtually.

So just, you know know in part of you know in the name of physical distancing dude do a virtual lunch date do a virtual coffee date with your with a potential future gf and it just fired me up it was inspiring so yeah joe pelz on legend i think this has shown us that virtual dating is a good intermediary step before you meet someone it's like do a facetime date and just see if you got rhythm. It's a great call. It's a fire call. You can be yourself.

You're in your home. You're naturally going to sort of be more you. I love it. I love it. And then you have a glass of wine with each other, but there's no threat of anything happening going down, you know? Correct. Okay.

My legend of the week is a Stoker's mom. It's this really great Stoker that I met doing Instagram live, Nika Buck. I hope I said that right, dude. He was such a nice dude. He jumped on the Instagram live and he just had great vibes from the beginning. And you know, him and his family are holed up during the quarantine, but he had a great positive attitude. And then I found out his mom, Denise Buck, is a sonographer and she's going into work every day at Catholic Medical Center in Manchester, New Hampshire. And she's putting in the hours, trying to help people during adverse conditions. And she is an absolute legend. And I'm just, this goes to all the people who are healthcare professionals out there, all the grocers, all the truck drivers, all the people who are keeping our

country stocked and healthy. We owe you guys so much. You will truly be remembered as heroes for this forever. And when we have our post-corona rager, you guys are the fucking bell of the ball. Let's get after it and let's celebrate the fuck out of you. So thank you to Denise Buck and to everyone else in these industries. We owe you so much.

That's awesome. Love it. Love it. All right, let's answer some cues real quick. I'm sure we got some hot cues from Stokes. Hell yes. Oh, they're long, dude. They're still long.

Good news. Cues, first one I open up, two paragraphs. 11 o'clock at night. All right, Aaron, I am so sorry, dude. All right. What up, Chad and JT and any other honorable guests on the pod? I come to you in times of desperate need and I'm facing a truly complicated situation. I'm a freshman in college and this semester I decided to pick up

rock climbing at my student rec center. Yeah, rock climbing. What up, Chad? I started going every day and I truly fell in love with the sport. About a week or two ago, I met this mega babe that works at the climbing center and comes in to climb fairly often. The girl is super cute and has a great personality, not to mention she has a wagon, big butt. She's also super outdoorsy, which I am too. I love to surf, spearfish, hike, et cetera. We would see each other in the gym all the time, and I think we really hit it off. Here's where the problems start to arise.

When we got to talking, I had learned that she is an extremely straight-edged girl. She doesn't drink, go to bars, smoke, or even have an interest in partying, which I don't mind. That's totally chill. However, I'm a fraternity man and I love to rage. I drink three to four times a week and smoke almost every day. It's not a problem for me and I manage my time well, but I fear this babe will be put off by my tendencies of getting fucked up a lot. Another problem is that she asked what year I was when I told her I was a freshman. She looked a bit disappointed and she told me she was a senior. While I believe that age is, dude, I love that this kid titled it urgent Corona situation. Please answer. I think older ladies usually, I think older ladies usually do not want to mingle with

younger lads such as myself and a 20 year old, a 22 year old wouldn't go for an 18 year old. How do I approach this girl and let her know that i have an interest in her despite the age difference and i like to party and she doesn't we would still be really good together along with this the covid 19 pandemic has separated us by a three-hour drive how do i overcome this adversity dude i don't know she's got a wagon so i'd go for it yeah I think if the love is there you guys like that yeah dude just do a FaceTime date with her and I mean as the information comes out you can tell her you drink I don't think it's going to be a deal breaker I don't think the age is a deal breaker in the age of corona everything is a go um and God bless you young man yeah dude i would i would uh yeah i would just go for it try

try and lock down a date you know a nice zoom conference or something and then uh you know ease slowly into the party because i remember one time i i was i was trying to date this girl in college who um she didn't really party at all either and I was partying like every day and then uh we had like a date at a movie and I was playing just like the whole day before and then I had my buddy Mason drive me to the date and he drove both of us because I was too hammered to drive major turnoff for a first date so you know i would ease into it a little bit um and you know see how you guys jive but i think if the passion's there there'll be sparks dude we've been fired up that girl got in the car she's like your friend's dying good and she or your friend's driving good

and she pulled out a flask and just housed it i think we really would have made it i've been drinking all year year. I mean, dude, like a true rock climber, this dude's fighting an uphill battle, bro. I mean, I love the passion. I love what you're doing, dude. You know, there's V12. This might be a V13, dude. You're going to need a little bit of luck. Hopefully not bad luck. Number 13 for you right here, dude. Sounds like she's a sophisticated lady just trying to go to the gym and get her workout on. Sounds like you're pretty horny about it and that's pretty chill and i love that dude get after it dog never shut anything down never start a relationship based on untrue value so be you

going into it let her know what's up but uh you know if it doesn't work out there's other ones out there yeah i'll go ahead well i just think in the time we're in right now, there's no time for fears about these. All these small differences, they seem so inconsequential in the face of what we're facing. You know what I mean? What's important is you're both humans, you're both healthy, you're both alive, and you're both attracted to each other. That's a great place to start.

JD, you nailed it. And maybe that's why he subject titled this email COVID-19 crisis, dude. Cause he knew that, dude. Chad, what were you going to say? Oh, I was, I was a little more pessimistic. Hit it baby. There's a place for all of it. I used to date in college i there were two times when i dated older girls and uh to me this might just be a little practical

advice i uh and because they were older and they were like hot and older i was like so i was like i was like this is incredible this is like the hottest girl I'll ever be with. Like I just became obsessed and it scared them off. So, and I think that tends to happen with like older girls, especially if they're a hot, if you're a younger guy, then you're like, you're like,

this is incredible. Like I need to like, I need to marry this chick right now. So I would just play it a little, you know, go for it. But, but,

you know, play it a little cool. It for it but but you know play it a little cool it's just my advice yeah i love it all right we got alissa hi chad good big fan of the podcast coming to you from hollywood so i skew a little bit older in terms of the demographic that usually writes in for advice but nonetheless still seek your help boys i'm-year-old single lady and it's quarantine 2020. I sent the dude I'm hooking up with fire nudes, doing the Lord's work, if you ask me. I agree. He hearted the nude.

No response, no thank you. Not so much as an LOL. He hearted the nude. Gentlemen, am I unwarranted for being pissed for sending this man a nude? Little backstory for you. We've been hooking up for over a month. We've gone on four dates, nice restaurant.

I've slept over at his house. We've walked his dog. His primary communication style was texting and calling in the beginning, but now he hits me up in Instagram DM. Oh, I didn't know girls didn't like that. That's good to know. Fellas, what on God's green earth happened?

Yours truly, Quarantitties. Well, I wouldn't say as a general rule they don't like that. I think she means because they've been hooking up already and they already met. Not that he's – him and Dean – No, I know, but I did the same thing a couple times. Oh, yeah. So don't do that. Yeah, I'm not going to do that anymore.

But so, Striderider did you catch all that Partially She was hooking up with this guy She sent him nudes Like good nudes And all he did was heart it Yeah that's Yeah she should be mad

Yeah of course dude This guy's not worth a day Drop him like a bad habit Yeah he's probably talking like three other chicks. I would do this. I would say, you know what? He might be, it is the age of Corona. He could be going through something extraordinarily difficult.

So I think just to play it safe and to lead with empathy, I'd say, hey, is everything okay? Is anyone you know sick? Is everyone doing all right financially? And if he says yes, then then you go then what the fuck didn't you respond what the fuck dude yeah dude honestly i mean the age of corona might even be less cause for um bleeding with empathy because horniness is so augmented in this time and it's like like you know when someone doesn't get back to you right away or just like clicks heart you're like oh they're driving or like they're doing something like no he should be at his house

fully able to respond on his phone and if he is out driving or doing something then he's already out at this time so i gotta tell you i gotta bring the hammer right now this guy's done someone else deserves a dank dank uh sweet nudes from you you're a very nice lady you're a very chill lady someone else there's another guy out there who would appreciate it way, way, way more. Yeah. I think even if this guy is going through a tough time,

she gave him a gift. And if I was having a tough time and I got some amazing nudes, I'd be like, thank you so much. This really lifted my day. I mean, it's the least you can do. I mean, just a heart. I mean, this guy, he's done. Later.

I got a bad feeling you might not be the only one who's sending him nudes. Because if you respond to nudes with a heart, that probably means you got, because anytime you get nudes, it's like the greatest gift in the world. All right, here we go. If a virus can't spread, it goes away. My my dogs i refer here to your podcast of march 25th the comedy store karaoke movie theaters what in the fuck don't you guys get stay the fuck home all right uh i totally understand the anger but we recorded that podcast on march 9th so and i think we even mentioned the date during the podcast. So I understand your anger, but we're all trying to be responsible.

And I think it's somewhat misplaced. That's pretty hilarious. All right. Coronavirus is a relation cock block way too long. I'm sorry, dude. We will get to it next week. Quarantine stuff.. What up, legend? Simple question. During quarantine with my bank GF, she asked me if she could use my lawnmower 2.0 to keep the Stoke boosted. I said yes. Just wondering if cruising with the same lawnmower

isn't chill. Also, what brewskis should I get for these trying times? And if Strider's on, what are some dank IPAs or dipas? Sorry to make this long, but keep raging. Thanks for the wisdom. Dude, not long at all, Cam. Cam from Omaha.

Seems like. What was the first part? He's using a lawnmower 2.0, but what? He let his GF borrow it and he wants to know if that's chill. Maybe because he's worried about the germs. Oh, I think that's amazing.

Yeah. Yeah. If he doesn't have crabs, I think he's fine. Yeah, I would love if my GF used my Manscaped lawnmower. Yeah. Alright. That got me a little horny. Just Lysol if you're worried about germs.

Can you imagine your GF asking you for your lawnmower? Nothing would make me happier. I'd like to use it on my GF asking you for your lawnmower? Nothing would make me happier. I'd like to use it on my GF. Oh, yeah. Virtual five. Oh, nice.

Dude, those virtual fives are nice, dude. Do the slap noise, too, when we hit a virtual five? Oh, yeah. It's pretty cool. Pow. Pow. Pow. I did a whipping noise for some reason dude i mean i heard this guy ask about some ipas dude got me fired up i mean dude i would get yourself a nice little 90 minute or dude you know if you're quarantined you know you don't want to

be sucking down too many uh you know i love sculpins but a 90 minute or you're gonna get you know twice the bang for your buck so you know you can have one beer basically equals two brews get yourself a dogfish 90 minute uh brewski you're gonna be in good shape dude all right here we go yo what up chad jt aaron and hopefully strider and joe i'm currently listening to passion fruit by drizzy and just straight vibing in a hammock oh that's a good hammock song i'm writing to you because the stoke tank has been running an all-time low i've been chilling throughout quarantine but when my gym closed my stoke levels took a massive hit most of my fellow stokers are at the beach for spring break or stuck at home i think yeah well your friends are on spring break or assholes at the beginning of

the week my goal was to be jack juicy and tan but it's starting to seem unachievable my friend and i plan on lifting together every day and catching rays to be jacked, juicy, and tan, but it's starting to seem unachievable. My friend and I plan on lifting together every day and catching rays to be jacked and tan. Juicy is just a mindset. With our gym closed and cloudy weather, we aren't sure what to do. We've been staying positive and trying to be juicy, but it's been hard. I've been listening to more pods, trying to get stoked on knowledge and watching rom-coms with my mom. I can only last so long.

My quads miss the gym and my soul misses the days of good health. What should we do? P.S. It'd be dope if Aaron would spoon in my hammock with me. Oh, nice. All right. Dude, I mean. First of all, what's the weight limit in that hammock? That's a lot of beef.

That's like Mark McGuire and Jose canseco used to give each other steroids in a bathroom stall exactly just like that and and they did elbow bumps which we're all doing now oh yeah nice yeah oh yeah yeah dude i would just i would to this guy i would just trust that the time you're putting in now to stay safe and stay healthy you know that tan is going to be so much more golden because you're going to earn that golden you know bronze as opposed to you know you just got i mean we just got to put in our time now and then this this kind of, it makes it, it puts in perspective, like, how much we take things for granted, like the accessibility of a nice bronze in like Florida. Now we can't do that right now.

So now when you do get to do stuff like that, you're going to be so much more fired up on it and you're going to have a way different glow. You're going to have the glow of gratitude on top of it. So that's going to be legit. I think just hold that in your mind. It's fine. I agree with you, dude. I think also, look, some things are going to dip a little bit during this period of time.

You know what I mean? Like our tans might slip, our haircuts might get a little wily, you know, and our bans might slip, our haircuts might get a little wily, you know, and, uh, and our, our biceps might diminish. But I think the, the, the thing that I, it's easy to say to other people and it's hard to think to yourself, but the thing I try to say to people when they're feeling down is like, are you healthy? Like, are the people you're close to healthy? That is all we can focus on right now. Those things are green lights or positives or thumbs up, then you are doing great, brother. That is all you need to do right now is

stay healthy and stay isolated. But if you want to stay psyched, maybe do a Zoom with your buddies and just bang out a bunch of pushups together. Oh, yeah. Great call, dude. I do a call with me, Joe, our friend, Julie, Catherine, and Amir, we all do a FaceTime every day. Every time I get on there and I see those girls looking at me, just sitting in my room. And it's not even like a sexual thing. I'm just like, you know what? I want to fire these ladies up. I want to fire myself up. I just started doing clapping pushups and these ones, what are these things called? These shoulder ones. Oh yeah. Yeah. Oh, damn.

Maybe plank ups or something. I don't know. Yeah, baby. Maybe. Yeah. The drift. The drift. The drift.

All right. Frigging what up? I just wrote a five-paragraph essay about my dog's girlfriend and the situation surrounding it. Fully ready to send you guys for help, but the act of writing out the thoughts was so cathartic that I now know what to do. This just highlights the importance of having someone to talk to and really introspecting on your thoughts, which you guys helped me with. So I guess thanks for firing up my dome, which are now able to better circumvent these thoughts.

Knowing you have someone from whom to ask advice can be equally as effective as getting the advice itself. So thanks for that. Like me, so many other Stokas just below the surface ready to be awakened. Keep spreading the positivity and fun. You're rock solid, guys. Best, Quinn. P.S. I'm sure there's some copywriting issues,

but I would love to see some Four Horsemen of the Chilpocalypse shirts on the website. Uncle Joe and Relay's Guru Strider merch should be a thing. Woo! Dude, those were two fire emails. I got me fired up. What up? Yeah. That was awesome.

Have you guys been pinching your face? My fucking face itches like crazy. Yeah. Yeah. I touch my face a lot. Joe, you gotta stop with that, bro. Yeah, I know. Alright, one more question.

Yeah, let's do one more because that was more just like this guy being a legit chiller, dude, which I love. What's up, Stokers? Not really a question, but just thinking about the bros out there trying to occupy their time during all this. We've already kind of covered this. It's just about jacking off. Yeah, do it.

Clear the hopper dude do it uh it's crazy how many people are just asking about dating uh post like march 22nd everybody's fucking horny yeah and it's nice it's nice that they are you know what i mean like nothing will get in no virus war catastrophe can ever stop young people from being horny. Yeah, I'm horny. I'm horny. I just want to call it to that. Powerful thing on the planet is horniness.

It's what makes the globe go round. All right. Hey, bros. My stoke is low for most of last year. Bad breakup I had with my long-term girlfriend and struggles with friends at my last college I decided to switch schools and transfer I have a lot of buds in my new school and I have made friends and it's been great the only problem is that all of my friends have girlfriends and I don't so it has been a struggle for me meeting new ladies because I don't really have some friends coming out with me to help keep my confidence high and be still together when the

guys do come out they always have their girlfriends and they have to stay reserved have you guys experienced this I love my buds and their girlfriends, and they have to stay reserved. Have you guys experienced this? I love my buds and their girlfriends, but it sucks to be around relationships all the time and not be able to feel the same way. How can I fix my inner stoke and be all right with that situation? Dude, why don't you just, when you go out with the girlfriends, have the girlfriends help you out too.

Yeah, and have them bring their friends. Does no one have friends outside of this circle? Yeah. Why do you need another dude? Yeah. Sounds like he's making excuses. Kind of. It's like,

dude, yeah. Can't be, keep, keep making excuses. You got to go out and just get it done, dude. And you have resources.

Not only are you making excuses, you have something that is gold for you, which is other people in a relationship which means you're a chill guy you can bring a girl into that setting she's not going to feel awkward even if you're out at a bar meeting somebody and uh if that's not your crew that you go out with maybe that's your crew you go out with and you just chill and get drinks and then you have your other single friends that you go out with i don't know how expensive your crew is but you got to have some more friends that are single that you can go freaking shirt up sardine with dude yeah i mean i

found that that uh my friends girlfriends are the ones that help me out the most with the ladies often no i totally agree and i i feel where this dude's coming from i know what it feels like when you're like you feel a little out of lockstep with your bros, but I mean, dude, this is about survival and getting what you want. So you got to make some new bro friends that you can team up with, or you got to have these friends that you got introduced to me,

but it has been done and it will be done again and you can do it. Yeah. Unless you're a really weird dude. Unless you got like lizards unless you got like lizards in your place or so you got something weird going on dude then and maybe the girls are like not wanting to invest in you which honestly dude you gotta be honest with yourself at that point and be like yo dog am i a weird dude yeah but then you just festival then you go to an edm concert exactly go go to a reptile convention dog yeah like a uh go to an EDM concert. Exactly, bro. Go to a reptile convention, dog. Go to a guitar, fan-crafted convention.

There's someone for everyone, dog. This might not be your group. Take your lizard out to the park, and then the lizard girl will come up to you and be like, oh, nice lizard. And then you're like, oh, yeah, why don't you do a backflip when you toss it a grape? Correct, dude. Whoa, you keep your lizard on a leash? I like to let mine just go free. Whoa, will you communicate with your lizard? I leash i like to let mine just go free well will

you communicate with your lizard i don't know then maybe you guys are vibing dude that's all i'm saying is maybe you gotta branch out a little bit from this group dude lisa trager has a great bit about how she's very attracted to men who can walk their pit bull without a leash there is dude gold well honestly dude they should have that dog on leash dude because you know it could go up for another great it's so true it's a good joke i mean honestly dude i respect that dude i hear what you're coming from dude i mean that's an alpha move by that guy dude but it's a little bit dangerous maybe that's what she's into dude all right dude should we do our quote of the weeks and then we'll sign off yeah i i need to do a uh ad read too i forgot oh my dog okay guys i'm interrupting this podcast

to let you know once again that we are brought to you by Manscaped. Manscaped, thank you so much for keeping our trins pubed, for looking after our hogs, for making sure that our dongles are looking fresh and clean. Because dudes are growing the beard in this coronavirus, but that does not mean you should let your pubes go haywire. You know? You want them fresh. You want them clean.

You want to unwail them to the world at any moment you want to go up to your window you know maybe we're going to have like a singing convention uh sort of like they did on their balconies but this time it's showing your pubes in solidarity with everyone else who's quarantining and you want to have your pubes locked and loaded ready to go you want to be able to show your gong and make sure it looks fresh. Also, April is Testicular Cancer Awareness Month. One guy every hour, I don't know if you guys knew this, every day is diagnosed with testicular cancer.

So this is a reminder to all the men listening to check yourself before you wreck yourself. And Manscaped, in addition to providing the right tools and solutions for safe and easy manscaping, has partnered with the Testicular Cancer Society to spread awareness for men's health and early cancer detection. Together, TCS and Manscaped are committed to raising the awareness for the most common form of cancer in men aged 15 to 35 and giving support for fighters, survivors, and families impacted by testicular cancer as part of their We Save Balls initiative. cancer in men age 15 to 35 and giving support for fighters, survivors, and families impacted by testicular cancer as part of their We Save Balls initiative. While you're down there cleaning

up your sack, you need to also go ahead and investigate for lumps. You know, it's easy to do, just check your nuts, changes in size or pain, and I think we can all agree it's pretty fun playing with your nuts anyway. So, you know, that's a twofer. Manscaped recommends you check yourself once a month. If you do feel any lumps or swelling, give your doctor a call and say there's something wrong with my dong or my nuts. In addition to checking yourself regularly, you want to make sure your sack is looking fresh and clean.

So get the Perfect Package 3.0. You can get the Lawn Mower 3.0 along with, you know, your Crop Preserver, Crop Reviver, Perfect Package, all kinds of stuff. Join the Manscaped movement and start taking care of your balls today. Get 20% off free shipping with the code GODEEP20 at Manscaped.com. That's GODEEP20 at manscaped.com that's go deep 20 at manscaped.com your balls will thank you dude how amazing is it

that they have a synthetic nut that they put in your sack if you lose the testy now oh yeah they give you like a plastic nut in there that like feels like a real nut how long until it starts making jizz I think right away I think it comes in packed with jizz but i think you got to get it reloaded every every year uh chad what is your uh quote of the week can you skip me because i need to look my

note yeah baby we'll close with you joe what's your quote of the week? Yeah, I was trying to think of a quote from Michael Clayton. Dude, the enemy one. Yeah, I like that one. Yeah, when he says to Arthur, when Michael says to Arthur, he's like, hey, man, I'm not the enemy here. And he's like, well, then what are you? Michael doesn't know. Because he was grilling him. So if you're not on his side, then.

What does it mean? I love it. Strider. What's your quote of the week Alright dude Saw this while I was making myself a dank Little cup of chamomile tea the other night And um Every time I see an adult On a bicycle I no longer

Despair for the future of the human race HG Wells Fire move Fire quote I think it's nice for our times it's like look dude we'll get some adults

on some bikes soon dude so I'm amped up on it contradictory to my beefs Aaron what's your do you have a quote of the week you want to throw something I was going to look something up

but I don't have anything on hand now copy copy my quote of the week is Ernest Hemingway the world breaks everyone and afterwards but I don't have anything on hand now. Copy, copy. My quote of the week is Ernest Hemingway. The world breaks everyone, and afterwards, many are strong at the broken places.

I misquoted a lot. I say the world breaks everyone, it makes us stronger in the broken places, which is a tidbit more optimistic and all-encompassing. But yeah. Chad, you got one? Yeah. So I just watched Rounders with Matt Damon and Edward Norton. And Teddy KGB played by John Malkovich.

He says, he's a Russian guy. He says, just like a young man. I can't do accents. No, it's good. Oh, good. Just like a young man coming I can't do accents. No, it's good. Just like a young man coming in for a quickie. I feel so unsatisfied. Did that come through? Yeah.

He goads him. Let's see. From Lord of the Rings. Ooh. At the Black Gates, Aragorn. I see in your eyes the same fear that would take the heart of me. A day may come when the courage of men fails, when we forsake our friends and break all bonds of fellowship,

but it is not this day. An hour of wolves and shattered shields when the age of men comes crashing down, but it is not this day. This day we fight. Aaron, let's go. That's a fucking perfect send-off. That's the fucking perfect quote for right now.

You're the fucking man, dude. I love that. Let's go. Thank you. Hell yes, dude. That's what I'm's go. Thank you. Hell yes, dude. That's what I'm talking about. Guys, are we the first ATC podcast to have you on camera on the podcast, Aaron? Or have the other Zoom ones had you as well?

No, this is the first one. Yeah. What up? Yeah. What up, dude? History has been made, dude. Guys, I love you all. Chad, I love you, dog. I love made, dude. Guys, I love you all. Chad, I love you, dog.

I love you, bro. Love you, guys. This was fun. Good times. Thanks, Aaron. Thank you, guys. Thank you, Aaron. Stay safe out there. Stay safe, guys.

Later, legends. Alright. guys later legends all right if you need advice these guys are really nice you wanna know what to do where to go when you need someone to guide you to have the world beside you

call me Thank you.