Going Deep with Chad and JT - Ep 132 - Ron Funches Joins

Episode Date: May 20, 2020

What up lords of stoker! This week we are joined by comedian extraordinaire, Ron Funches, we talk comedy, wrestling, gaming, and being positive. It's a banger infused with charm.Sponsored by Manscaped: Get 20% Off and Free Shipping with the code GODEEP20 at Manscaped.com. If you wanna trim your pubes during a contagion.

here we go have fun thank you all right let's get it on what's up guys this is chad kroger coming in with the going deep with chad and jt podcast guys before we begin i'll remind you once again that we are brought to you by Manscaped. Manscaped, thank you so much for keeping our trims pubed, for looking after our hogs, for making sure that our dongs are looking fresh and clean because we may be in the key team right now,

but that doesn't mean you can't stay fresh and prep for the eventual opening when you can show the world your hog again. So use code go deep 20 at manscaped.com go deep 20. And I'm here with my compadre Jean Thomas. What up? What up dog? Boom clap Stokers. And we're here with comedian Ron Funches. Thank you so much for coming on the pod. Thank you. I don't have a catchphrase, but thank you for having me. My ambition is by the end of this podcast, you'll have a catchphrase that works in our universe. Okay. Sounds good. No presh. We'll see if we get there. I was going to go with no presh, but you took that one.

how are you holding up during the coronavirus not well i mean i guess depends on who you ask better than others and then not as well as some other people you know uh it's all in the middle it ebbs and flows i just try to ride with it some days i feel super fine and okay and i'm like oh i'm okay now i'm fine everything's good everyone's healthy and then other days i'm like oh i'm gonna stand up and i'm useless and i don't have anything to provide to anyone so you know it's right in the middle right yeah have you thought about how your stand-up will do you think you're like will you go back to doing your same set when we come out of this or do you think it's gonna drastically change because of this situation i mean of course it'll have to change you know there's some jokes that won't work and there's some jokes that that still will work so but it will have to be probably framed

differently so um i think you know i'll definitely have to do new things but um and i was a little bit worried about nothing would come to me and stuff and that everything is like you know taken and we're all gonna be talking about the same things but like just from going out and about and i went to the dentist today and i was just thinking of funny things and having a good time and i was like oh it's still like my desire to create and to to comment on things is still there and that made me feel more confident and happy um so i just look forward to what i'm mostly concerned is just you know the fear of actually going out on the road because i know there's some clubs that are open now

yeah it's pretty wild yeah were you on tour when this all went down and did you i was in honolulu for my birthday it was march 12th was my birthday and i was right around when everything started getting weird and i had to play um plan to show out there and was gonna just enjoy my birthday out there as well and um so we stayed out there for about two days and so it's kind of interesting to be out there well watch because you would see people panicking but then you're also would be like oh look at this beautiful ocean and it was um in some ways I was like that's a thing that I wanted to keep with me when I came back home was like oh even though

everybody's panicking things are freaking out like you know it's still beautiful outside it's still um you know there's still good things going on. So I try to remember that. Right. Yeah, I stayed at my mom's for like two months at the beginning of this quarantine. And I would go outside and there was just always birds chirping. And I was like, oh, the birds don't even know there's a pandemic going on right now. And something about that made me feel more optimistic about our human plight.

I was like, we'll be all right. Yeah. Yeah, I always feel like that. I said that about like after plight. I was like, we'll be all right. Yeah, I always feel like that. I said that about like after the election. Like, oh, you know, people were freaking out like the world's falling apart. I was like, well, dogs are still

running around outside. Like dogs are usually the first to know. They're usually the first ones taking off or something. So as long as they're chill, I'm like, okay, we're going to be okay. Yeah. That's great.

Yeah. Have you been paranoid about catching it, or are you just sort of like in a general sort of just waiting for everything to sort of get back to normal? I'm not necessarily too paranoid about catching it because I'm a hermit. I don't really go anywhere in general. So I haven't really been that worried. But I'm more concerned about long-term ramifications you

know just economic about jobs coming back you know just when the clubs come back open and they're going to be like you know 35 capacity or whatever which means guarantee is probably going to be down low which means you know my feature is not going to be paid as well either so it's like it's all like you know this thing where you're like, oh, this is going to take a while. That's what paranoid me because I wish

we were even, feel like I was starting on the road to recovery. I'm like, no, we're still going through the fucking loss. The bulk of it. The waiting game is just brutal uh just you know you wake up every day you look at the news you're like all right what's going on now it's it's rarely good but i feel like it's starting to starting to feel a little

bit normal again like i i got i went to the beach and i was like oh you know people are out and about they're smiling yeah there's definitely more people out and about. I went, like I said, I went to the dentist and that was nice. It was, that was what was made it so weird. I was like, man, I'm so happy to see my dentist today. Conversating in between like teep scraping. And I was just like, I normally would just shut up and try to get this done as quick as possible. But I'm like, I just, it's just nice to talk to someone.

Yeah. Yeah. You know, I've, I've been, I've been a total Herman as well. And then today I went for a bike ride and just seeing people socially interact and just being close to other people on their bikes. It kind of opened up this thing that I had closed, which was like my need for other people. I've like completely compartmentalize that. But then today I got a taste of it and I was like I was I was almost scared I was like I should just go straight home because I don't know if I want to stoke this

feeling too much because then like I'm liable to go hug a stranger or something yeah you can't do that right now yeah but yeah I see that more and more because um me and my fiance like to go you know walks in the evening and you just see more and more people waving me and my fiance like to go on you know walks in the evening and you just see more and more people waving at each other and saying hi to each other and which is nice yeah nice to see that it sucks that it always takes like a trauma pandemic to make that happen and yeah but you know it's that it is nice that that happened it is a good upshot that it brings us all closer together yeah it makes people less racist which is fun but then also people are racist against just one group which but it's kind of cool you know that's what i've been talking about on my podcast a lot is like

uh you find out that like it seems like you know division and racism and all those types of separate separatist tactics are things that work better while we're, while the, um, while we're doing well, like we have, we have time to like, be like, Oh, I don't like you. You're different, you know? But like when there's a pandemic, all of a sudden it's like, you know, I don't, I don't have time to be racist anymore. It flattens it a bit. yeah well that's good yeah it's real good hopefully people can remember that yeah some positives yeah that's gonna suck if people revert

to being racist after not being racist for a while yeah you had it you were in the pocket yeah they're still trying it you know now they're just being racist to chinese people only so right yeah uh you're a big gamer right you love video games so you've been able to Now they're just being racist to Chinese people only. Right. You're a big gamer, right? You love video games, so you've been able to indulge in that. Yeah, I've been gaming it up quite a bit. I'm playing a little Animal Crossing here and there. I'm playing a little bit

Call of Duty. Got back into Grand Theft Auto 5 because they re-released it for free on PC and I got a pretty nice computer. I'm just going back and remembering how I looked on 360. I was like, this is a 360 game and how good it looks now. And it's actually been very helpful because, you know, it's set in like fictionalized Los Angeles.

And so it's kind of nice to just drive around and see it all full of people and just causing a bunch of mayhem. It's a little bit of a i don't know it's a nice escape escapism yeah yeah we play call of duty relentless i've only started during the quarantine and now i'm obsessed i'm a little bummed because my crew has migrated primarily to war zone and i'm more of a multiplayer guy but i can still i can still get it get it on in war zone yeah i just get and now because you when you get used to multiplayer you're like hey 50 60 kills and you

know yeah it's on you like oh three kills five oh five kills was a great game yeah yeah i know i hop on there and there's three guys in a party i'm like are we playing are we playing like hide and wait for an hour are we gonna actually get actually get some action? You got to get a better crew because the key is to play aggressively. And, oh, man, nothing better than you grab a crew of your friends in a helicopter and start chasing people down. Oh, come on. I've learned that. I've taken that tactic sometimes.

I'm just like, all right, in this one, I'm just going to go aggressive the entire time. And that's often when I play a lot better. It's better to be the hunter not the hunted for sure yeah absolutely just like in life you know you play with no fear play angry it's fun it's fun yeah they say humans that's why our eyes are in the front because we're predators if we were prey our eyes would be on the top of our head oh okay i like how you talk yeah look out there at your target and get it.

I sound like Mystery teaching guys how to get ladies. Ron, I've been a huge fan of yours for so long. I think your Conan set from, I think it was the 2014 one, is my favorite Conan set. Oh. Yeah. I love the fuck linda joke so much and did they actually let you did they let you say fuck did they did they clear it for you are you like the only comic who's ever been cleared to say fuck on there i mean they bleeped it they definitely

bleeped it but they you know actually worked a lot on that set with JP Buck who's the producer for all the comedy there at Conan and um he was very helpful and you know teaching me a lot more curse words than other jokes and he was like hey if we can figure out a way to change it and make it funnier without cursing and it's better for both of us and then we can save that fuck for this joke where it needs it and that's what I really liked about him is that he wasn't just like oh we can't do fuck for this joke where it needs it and that's what i really liked about him is that he wasn't just like oh we can't do it he was like no i get it like this joke needs it but this joke doesn't so if we save it over here we can let you do it here and we'll just bleep it and um what actually i really like when i remember about that is that all my whole

family and friends were there and i was really nervous but they had like new super mario brothers on the wii and in the in the green room and that made me feel chill they just told me to go slow and they had this like kid uh movie star who was on before me and i just remember him kind of bombing and i was like oh no like this is not gonna be good for me and they just told me to go slow and I ended up doing like supposed to do like four and a half minutes I end up doing like six minutes six I'm a little bit over six and then they were just like oh great job we'll just figure out if we have to what we have to cut whatever and then later on that night I watch it and they didn't cuz they just they cut the part of the kids interview and kept my whole set.

That's so interesting. Yeah, your pacing was so I noticed it right away. It was so deliberate. And so that was something you guys worked out together. Yeah, you just knew that my you know, that my pacing was slow and that I was going to be nervous. So I was going to probably speed up no matter what. And he was just like, if you think you're pacing was slow and that i was going to be nervous so i was going to probably speed up no matter what and he was just like if you think you're going too slow go slower and so i just did that and then it was like wow that was really really slow how do you how do you deal with the do you have like a strategy for dealing with the nerves before like a late night tv set or how do you handle that situation i mean my only no you know there's

not much more you can do than get experience you know so you gotta just have to go through it and be comfortable with that i remember a long time ago i went just open mic him with this guy and we just went to this like truck stop and it was just a horrible place but i had been doing comedy probably like three or four years he had been doing comedy like a year and so he bombed and i go up and i managed to get their attention i have a little fun i do okay and then he was just like oh man what could i have done better what could i have changed what could i have done and i was just like, oh, man, what could I have done better? What could I have changed? What could I have done? And I was just like, you just don't have the skill set yet. You haven't been doing it long enough.

And he could not accept that answer. He got so mad at that. And I was like, oh, there's just like, I mean, like, that's, I'm telling you the truth, man. I'm not trying to hide anything. Yeah. And so that's a lot of that i think about but the one note that that i did get that was helpful for me was um not to go they're thinking about the people who said you'd make it to go go in thinking about all the people who told you you wouldn't i'll be happy to be there yeah you'd be there to prove the people who told you you wouldn't make it wrong.

And it kind of gives you, you know, gets rid of that. Like, oh, this is wow. Oh, I can't believe it. It takes that away and gives you back. Like, I have a job to do. I have to show, you know, insert whoever wrong, you know? Right. Yeah.

That's been tough for me. I was like, I was a ne'er-do-well growing up and got like booted out of school and stuff but i was always very supported i'm so sorry to hear that like i'll sometimes like i'll be like oh that that english teacher i had he was he was a dick he thought i was spoiled and that i wouldn't work hard i was was like, he was kind of right. And he was also nice to me at other times. So it's always like kind of a hedged nemesis. Never a full-blown someone I got to prove wrong. Well, sometimes it's yourself, you know? That's what it is.

You find it in whatever ways it works for you. No, like I've never fallen into that thing. Like a lot of comedians are always like, oh, you got to come from trauma. You got to come from stuff. And like some people do it and i happen to that is where my comedy was born from but i don't believe that that happens has to be for everyone i've known people who have great parents great family lives and they're also excellent comedians i know people

from all different backgrounds that are great comedians. You're just something that you're called to do. It doesn't necessarily matter your background, you know, but it does for me, it just happened to help save my life, you know? So, yeah. And you have such a unique sort of point of view and in your comedy is,

it's primarily a positive kind of voice. Did you always have that even when you were starting out or is that something you developed just like that? Yeah. I mean, I don't necessarily call it positive. I guess it's mostly optimistic is my comedy. Yeah. Come at it from a, most of my comedy had been like, what's the, what's the optimistic view of this bad situation

that i went through you know like one of my favorite jokes when i first started was this crosswalk nigga joke where i would say like oh i was walking crosswalk one day and as this guy yelled at the street use the crosswalk n-word and then but i was like oh because he was in a car i couldn't hear that he was like he also said because i'm worried about your safety like he was just trying to figure out what's the most and that's like where the fuck linda joke came from it's right i saw a guy on a bus with that tattoo and i thought what's the most positive reason why he could have that too? Oh, he's just absent-minded. He can't remember to sleep with his lady that he loves.

And so he's like, I got to get it tatted on my neck. So that's just where a lot of my comedy came from because I knew it was a thing that I wanted to do every night. It was a thing that I knew from being a fan of it, that it wasn't improvised every night. It wasn't like, oh, here comes a brand new hour I'm doing every night. You're saying a lot of the same things over and over. And I believe in the power of words and the power of what you put out. And so I was like, if I'm going to say the same things over and over, I want to talk about things I love. I want to talk about things I actually give a shit about. And it just also happened that, you know, I started comedy squarely in the like fuck Bush era.

And I was like, yeah, cool. But like, I don't care. You know, I was like, I want to talk about what I care about. I care about my son. I care about the shows I watch. I care about weed and video games and butts and so that's what i wanted to talk about yeah i always found that interesting that you you your son's 17 now and when i first started watching comedy you were one of the only comedians who like uh had a son how did that now they all copying me now they all stealing my style having children doing children material i was doing that shit 10 years ago was that ever weird when you'd be at like stand-up shows and all the other comedians are kind of like at a different place in their life but you guys are kind of at the same place but you have like

more responsibilities um i mean i think it just in a lot of ways everyone's got different lives and a lot of ways that helped me you know it kept me i was a person that could drift easily and my son kept me motivated my son was like my north star of like hey you can't hang out you can't fucking play around you can't go drink and party with everyone you got a kid to take care of it's a good job for you and so that helped me get through being a local comic um you know at a much quicker pace and so i i never looked at it as a native what the only way that i can say is but i wouldn't even say i wouldn't be done it any differently it's just that you know i've never been a hangout guy you know i'm not like oh remember when we all went and did this and that and that

like i didn't because i went and did my set and then i went and got mcdonald's and went home to my son you know like yeah that wasn't me and so i don't have a lot of like super tight-knit comedy friends like you know i've never been in like oh you know the we're a group and we all hung out together i've never been in that and so sometimes i uh feel like i missed out on that type of college aspect of it but i always felt that it was more fun that people liked me because i was good they didn't you know not because we were hanging out not because i did drugs with them somewhere not because i like got them out of some weird situation but because they liked my set

you know and they thought I was a cool person and I learned to really enjoy that more than like oh man I wish I wish you know if I didn't have a kid I could go hang out with people you know it's like I got over that real quick and the community can be a trap sometimes if you worry too much about what the other people in your crew think and you don't think enough about like what the outside audience thinks about you yeah it's you know it's a lot of people end up thinking it's a team sport you know they end up thinking that like oh we'll all make it together i hope it is a little bit because we're kind of in this together well you know what i mean there's duos there's things like that. And there's a community. Yeah. But sometimes, like when I started in Portland, they would go out and do comedy together.

But then it also like, oh, let's start a softball league. Let's all go do karaoke together. And it wasn't like, hey, let's all bust our ass to try to be the best so that we can become national comedians. It was more like, let's all not grow up. You let's all like just hang out together and do this stuff together and then a lot of them turn 30 35 and then realize that they were still open mic and then they quit you know and i didn't want to quit i wanted to fucking do comedy so it was more about like i better stay focused on what i want to do what what i see works for me and works for the audience i'm trying to build and much more than like just hanging out and seeing what other comedians are doing you know that could be the death of the

comedian trying to play for the back of the room right and you you started in portland right how many years were you there until you made the move to LA about six seven years yeah I mean I was living in Salem Oregon so I had to travel back and forth and do shows in Portland shows all over the northwest Seattle Seattle was where I'm first really got any type of traction because Portland didn't have a great scene when I started we didn't have like the helium club we didn't have the the festival that we no longer have now but you know but it was lucky for me that like as I was coming up in Portland the scene was growing as I was growing and so like by the time I was getting any good the Bridgetown Festival was

happening which let me meet a lot of my heroes. That's how I first met Bobcat Goldthwait and Ron Lynch and Moshe Kasher and all those guys and John Mulaney. And those end up being the people who first got me out of Portland and taking me on the road. Moshe took me all over Seattle and San Francisco. And I remember John called me up and asked me to go do shows for him in New York. And I was like, man, you live in New York.

You know, lots of people that live in New York that want to open for you. You're going to fly me out from Oregon. Yeah. Shows for you in New York. I mean, absolutely. I'm not turning it down. But, you know, he's a great dude, man. I learned a lot a lot from

that guy he's like my my comedy as he will put it and i do not agree he's like my comedy dad even though he was younger than me yeah and then no good and then you and um i remember you were on late night the same night that ian carmel was on the same late night show as you and you guys were like roommates back in portland yeah and it was it was pretty cool to see you guys like because he calls you he's doing his set and then he talks to you when you're on the couch and he's like dude can you believe this is like fucking happening yeah that's beautiful thank you for reminding me of that i forgot about that but yeah that was a beautiful time um and it was so um giving of him that he was like hey no go ahead keep Ron mic'd you know like just everybody stay mic'd and we'll just talk and have

fun during the set and he wasn't so like freaking freaked out about it that he didn't want to make it fun I think it made it more memorable and more fun and it was so cool that we got to share it together and I think it really um made the community you know feel i don't want to speak but it inspired the community but it was cool it was a cool thing for portland you know the two of us were both on a late not only any late night show we were both on conan which is you know our favorite and then he's the head writer on cordon now yeah Yeah, so I guess Corden is his favorite now. When you guys met each other, did you recognize a kindred spirit and that he had the same level of ambition that you did? Yeah, I would say that would be the main thing I recognized right away

because he was doing improv when I met him. He wasn't even a stand-up. But I saw him at an improv show at bridgetown and he was the only one that especially because i was a snarky mid-20s stand-up who was like fucking pro you know i was so they eyes i was like man look all these guys aren't funny but like oh this guy this guy's funny though and i met him later on and he was always at the same mics and grinding. And I, we always told the story before,

like he, I saw him at a show and then he comes around in the car and he's blaring this song from this DJ quick corrupt album that I was also playing at the same time. And I knew that I was probably the only comic in Portland listening to this DJ quick corrupt album. And to hear him playing it, I was like the only comic in Portland listening to this DJ Quick Corrupt album. And to hear him playing it, I was like, oh, man, I like this guy. We became real. We would always even call each other like LeBron and Durant because I was because sometimes you would motivate each other. Because sometimes I was like, I don't even want to go to a mic. I was like, oh, I know.

I know Carmel's got a show tonight, so I better go hit a show tonight. I know Carmel's got a show tonight, so I better go hit a show tonight. And we definitely – I won't speak for him, but he definitely motivated me to work hard and to become a better comic. That's great. Yeah, he's got such a unique – that one Conan – I can't remember the – with the buzzer. Is that right? Oh, you're talking about Ian Abramson, I think. Oh that guy's funny though never mind never mind anyways that guy's really funny

his show where you would do comedy with no one in the audience he was a trendsetter. He was a trendsetter. I'm also curious, was it hard for you at all to transition as a comedian from not being successful to also being successful? And then also, some of the listeners might not know, but you came in, you were a lot heavier than you are now. And was there any part of you that was like, oh man, if I go through these transitions, my persona might have to kind of change? Yeah, of course. Yeah, I mean, to answer your first question, I think by that time that I got success, I wasn't really worried about it because I had to teach myself to stop sabotaging success in order to get any.

I used to be like that because, man, even in my early teens, I used to hate myself to stop sabotaging success in order to get any, you know, I used to be like that. But man, even in my early teens, I used to hate people with money. You know, I used to think that if you had money, you have to do evil things to get it. And you were a bad person.

If you had, you know, any type of fair amount of money, because I just grew up around people who never had it. And so I had to teach myself that that was wrong by, by meeting nice people with money and meeting, you know, other people and learning like, oh, I can't. Oh, I want to hate you, but you're so freaking cool. You know, and then I just started like, oh, why am I trying to set money is a neutral force in this?

Why am I trying to separate myself from this? I can choose how I act with money. And so I had to go through a lot of things mentally with myself first. And then by the time I started receiving any success, I was like, I'm okay. I'm okay with this. I like it. I'm open to more. And I trust more will come. I believe in abundance much more than scarcity. So even now, I believe in abundance. So I try not to take a job just for money or anything. I always try to, money's a factor. But my acting coach, she gave me great advice. She's like, you always take a job for a few factors, money, for experience,

because it's someone you want to work with, because the material is amazing, or it's someone you want to work with because the material is amazing or it's just great connections. And if it doesn't meet those things, you don't take the job. So I just kind of live by that with that. And then to answer your other question about my health, it was I mean, it was a real concern about my health. I wasn't doing well. I wasn't sweating, not doing much. You know, I was getting close to having sleep apnea problems and stuff. And so I had a conversation with my mom and I was on Undateable at the time. And the character was kind of this overweight, lovable loser, but the showrunner,

he was like, Hey man, like, he's like, we, we got you because you're funny and you're talented. I seen you trying to work out, trying to lose weight if you want to do that i won't let you know like we hired you because of who you are you don't have to stay back to stay this character and so i um got more focused on it i got a trainer uh and then which was mostly like it was i knew it'd be a short-term problem because people would be like oh you look differently I don't know who you are and then I knew from like Jonah Hill and all those people that people are like oh if you lose weight you're not as funny anymore but I was like well I feel better I'm more energetic I can do two shows I can write more so how the fuck am I going to be

less funny so I don't really understand that so So it was more like long-term plans. Cause I was like, if I stay the way that I was, maybe, maybe if I find some, like some super open-minded casting agent, they'll be like, submit me to be some leading man and something.

But for the most part, I was going to be stuck being the fat friend on something or like the guy that people were making fun of or some shit or some homeless guy that I played a lot of. And I just knew what my goals were. I wanted to be a leading man type. I grew up in love with Billy Crystal type, the Rick Moranis people like that. And I was like, I think that's me. And you can disagree. You can say that I'm egotistical in thinking that, but I think that's me and you can disagree you can say that I'm egotistical and thinking that but I think that's me and I want to do that and so I thought the the weight would be a big uh deterrent in in achieving that and just also in um my trainer put it a great way to make it more he's like hey we're not doing this because you're

you're horrible now. Like, obviously, you're successful now. You get girls now. You're doing fine now. We're doing this so that you get more opportunities, more money. And that's it. And I was like, great. He's like, more healthy with more opportunity.

And I'm like, hey, I'm all about that. Yeah. That's true. Being healthy, it's only positive. Like, the more healthy stuff I do in a day, I just feel better. I've been thinking about that a lot now during the quarantine because there's, like, I definitely have a tendency of trying to go the other way, getting, like, just sad and just being like,

oh, I want to eat a whole box of cereal or I want to eat a bunch of ice cream or whatever. Then I think about, man, no. This quarantine is literally stealing time from me. I don't want to add more to that time by doing bad things to my health.

I want to do, if anything, I want to gain time. I want to offset that time by working out more and focusing on my diet so that when i come out of this i'm like okay i might have lost a couple months but i didn't also gain 20 pounds and you know lose another another six months of my life off of it and for me it's also so if i do get this thing i can handle it better you know like my lungs are strong my biceps are strong exactly you just want to stay ready i think um i learned a lot from watching professional wrestling as a

big wrestling fan and i was listening to this this uh guy arn anderson who's a legendary wrestler and he was like a lot of people make your job more complicated than it is. He's like, but your job as a performer is to just be ready, stay prepared, be in the best shape of your life and have a good attitude. And I was like, man, that that goes for my job, too. So I've been trying to live by that. I'm like, hey, I just want to stay ready. If I get some role, I don't have to be like, oh, I need to get 20, lose 20 pounds before we start shooting like no i'm ready let's go let's shoot i'm camera ready today you know and then i just have a good attitude and i'm coming to come in and know my lines know my shit i'll be ready and that's all i control what's your favorite era of wrestling all time from any organization

oh that's a good question um long time any organization i would have thought it was like the late 80s wwf yes strong yeah because that's what i grew up watching but as an adult going back and watching it doesn't hold my attention as much as everything's slow everything's childish and cartoonish but i'm really finding that i really enjoy is like 95, 96, 97 WCW. But they got some real killer just workers, people just busting their ass like Dean Malenko and Chris Jericho and people who. Eddie Guerrero. Oh, yes. Exactly.

Eddie Guerrero. Yes. Ray Mysterio before he got on the gas and got too heavy yeah he got too heavy yes and then Booker T and Jared Jack or Jade what's his name Jeff Jarrett

yeah yeah Scott Steiner you got a lot of good things going on over there yeah those guys were great that was a really good it was that old sting that was right when new sting came in right right when new sting came but that's a fun journey to go through to watch people turn their back on sting so then he turns his back on them and then he's like i also just saw the crow movie so i know exactly what i want it was the crow that's so interesting i never made that connection that's you never made that connection. You never made that connection?

No, no. And I like that movie too. I'm a big fan of The Crow. My brother and I used to crush that shit all the time. Yeah, dude. Because it was interesting because he comes back from the dead, but he still kind of makes jokes. Like in the end, he's like, hey, I lost my powers.

And he kind of has a sense of humor about it. You don't expect that from a reincarnated Avenger. Well, he's been through a lot. Yeah. I like that he kept his sense he's been through a lot. Yeah. I like that. He kept his sense of humor. That was big. Yeah.

You know what WCW era I loved is when WWF was crushing them in the early two thousands. And when, uh, Jared, Jeff, Jared and Booker T got their push to be like the heads of it. Right.

Right. When ready to rumble came up, no one was watching WCW. And I thought that was when it was kind of at its best. Cause they were trying so much different stuff. Like they were just like sucking so much gas that they were just like giving different guys pushes. And it felt like different taglines,

like Booker T was trying out new taglines, like save the drama for your mama or something. It was like that for like a month. And I'd read reviews and they'd be like, oh, his new tagline's like a C, but we think he can get it to a B with energy. It was more interesting. WWF was operating at such a high level.

It was almost too. There was no like. No drama, no mystique. Yeah, it was more fun to watch WCW like workshop. Yeah. But also, man, I was watching some recently and you just like, man, this is some of the most misogynistic, horrible stuff that you'd ever see. Like, man, when they really turned it over to Vince Russo, as much as trash as he talks, I'm like, man,

you don't know how to write a single thing. You just, everything is just like putting women in mud matches and just, just stupid stuff. Yeah. And he was the guy, he used to be like the best writer, and then he kind of lost his cachet. And then he came to WCW, and that's when like Raven walked out on him and stuff like that.

Okay. So you walked. Yeah. I used to be a contributor to little wrestling websites. I like that. PPWW.net i was like yeah i was i was very invested oh so you were a dave melzer guy huh yeah and then ecw was that that was the one i was always it was hard to find but it always seemed like the most interesting stuff was coming out of there. Have you guys noticed that I've been drinking from like four different? Yeah, I saw that.

I was like, is that your bottle? Staying hydrated. I like it. You got to. Some of them are very flat. Oh, is that why you're switching? Trying to find the carbonation. I'm switching and trying to remember which one was the most recent.

Yeah. This is a good one. Who's your favorite wrestler? Of all time? Ric Flair. Oh, dude. Yeah. Yes.

What'd you think about his doc? Oh, man. Great. So great. I really enjoyed it. I love all those 30 for 30s. I really like this last dance one that they just finished with the bulls as they grew up in chicago and grew up during that whole jordan era so i really love that one

uh but we're talking about wrestlers right now i would probably say my favorites are probably oh oh a guy named hiromu takahashi he's amazing he's one of my favorites he lives in japan and then um i really like orange cassidy which is the shirt I'm wearing right now. He's lazy and he doesn't do anything. Oh, that's interesting. I like it. He keeps his hands in his pocket. Yeah. What's like the worst branding you've ever seen for a wrestler where you're like, oh, my God, this is just all wrong all the way across.

Oh, man, there's so many. There's a lot of them a lot of them there was that time when adam rose got released and then he got arrested for domestic violence and he put his mugshot on a t-shirt and i was admitting that stuff was fake like goldberg did an interview during nitro where he was like and then people thought i should be a heel and i was like i don't think i should be a heel and i was like guys i don't think we should be going this deep into how the sausage is made yeah i was watching one of those episodes recently where um kevin nash goes to powerbomb goldberg and then he pushes him off and walks away. And they're like, that was supposed to be the finish.

That was supposed to be the finish. Goldberg's going in for himself. And it's just like, well, I mean, obviously he's not. You guys would never talk about it. That wrestling movie that came out about, I forget her but she she's the wwf champ uh fighting for my family oh page yeah yeah and it was such a good movie but then the finale is her wrestling for the championship and you're supposed to buy into the stakes but it's a scripted sport so you're like yeah yeah i've been thinking about that a lot because i want to write a comedy movie

about wrestling but that's that's really the issue is how do you get a climax out of a scripted sport where people are supposed to either because Nacho Libre they did it but they they kept it as if it was real the whole time so I don't know maybe that's what you got to do are you gonna do like a Bret Hart Shawn Michaels thing like a Montreal Screwjob no I think if anything be more like a Montreal Screwjob? No, I think if anything, it'd be more like a Brett and Owen thing, like brothers. Oh, that'd be nice. Yeah. Yeah, like a Hart family thing, like a legacy of excellence in wrestling? That'd be fucking

cool. That's always been, that's one of the, I mean, Vince McMahon's done some shady shit, but that's probably, I don't know, maybe I'm just taking a hard line. I don't know what I would have done in his shoes had that happened. You probably should, I mean, I don't know what I would do either, but it seems like you stop a show. It seems like you just say this is over.

The guy died. We should probably stop. But, you know, they don't stop during pandemic. They just kept on rolling. They never even stopped during that. And that's why I don't, you know, not fucking with them heavy right now. I'm more into like New Japan because like they've just been really cool they they they WWE fired a bunch of people and laid a bunch of people off and New Japan just stopped running shows since like March or February and but they didn't fire

anybody they just kept paying everybody their full salary and just was like, stay home, stay safe. I'm like, man, that's a company that cares about its employees. A lot of comedians write for WWE at times too, and everyone says it's a hard-ass job. Yeah. They really grind you. Chris O'Neal probably being the most famous, right?

Yeah. Yeah, no, it seems horrible. It seems like you gotta live around their schedule, you know? That's what people say about Patrice. What's so weird is that he worked there and he would take off and go do sets.

Patrice wrote for Wrestling? I didn't know that. Yeah. Sorry, go ahead. No, you go, Doug. Is Rob Gronkowski, is he doing wwe he was yeah he's a he's like a champion there but then he left the back of the tampa bay but oh gotcha gotcha and i said oh it wasn't good you don't think i had a promising it doesn't translate to

me like you keep the party boy nfl thing in the nfl i don't want to me. Like you keep the party boy NFL thing in the NFL. I don't want to really watch that and written wrestling, but no, no, I didn't like it. I didn't think he was good. Yeah. It's, it's always like, it's always disrespectful to the hardcore fans in any sport when there's that crossover, like when CM Punk came to UFC and just like, God bless him. He put his life on the line to fight like there's no way to fake it but he got his ass rocked like every time and and had high profile

fights i could see why people resented him but with that it's a little bit easier to understand because it's hard to respect because it's like he might die every time he goes in there yeah that's true i mean no i respect anybody i mean lord knows they gave me the opportunity i'd be right in there too but um you know i'm not going to be like oh it's great if it's not great like i'll give anything a try ronda rousey give you a try she was pretty damn good she's pretty spiteful towards the audience though yeah but i kind of like that oh you did that she was giving it back to like that yeah like that. Yeah. Yeah. I like that. I wish we did that more in person and less online.

You know, do that in the ring on the mic. She's mean, dude. Yeah, she does seem mean. She seems very mean. On the Ultimate Fighter, she was trash talking one of her rivals, and she's like, your husband's a coward. I was like, why'd you have to bring him into this? I was like, leave him alone, dude.

But she's just super alpha. She's got to do that shit. Yeah, when you punch ladies in a cage for a living, you got, you know, you're just going to be a little different as a human being. Yeah, you have a great, and I don't want to, I know it's like a faux pas to have a comedian explain their bit, but I saw you at Largo one time

and it was like a different bit that i never heard you do and you talked about going to a weed store in canada and almost getting into a fight yeah and it was a yeah that was a did you ever put that on a special or anything or was that just a bit you tooled around with for a while just a bit that i did for a while i don't know if i ever recorded anything like that because again it got too long and it was like peter out at some parts um so i don't think i ever recorded it for anything but now you'll make me want to try it again but now it's too too it happened too long ago for me to think of it and be like oh let me tell you this um right you're not connected to it the same way yeah but i might find something who knows i'll find something to connect with it that's why i always do is like i never throw anything away you know like i might

decide because i for the longest time i thought that was going to end up in my special that came out on comedy central uh called giggle fake go watch it it's available i forgot i could plug things um but it ended up being kind of like so different than the rest of the themes of my set that i was like oh i'm not going to try to force this in there just because i like this story like i'm gonna go with what works for the theme of this hour and i'll just do that and so um you know i just it'll if something connects to it i'll bring it back if not it'll just be something that other people listen to and i kind of like that that's fun you you said something interesting on uh conan's podcast about your attitude

towards success like you try to maintain it you realize that at a certain point that being a comedian you're paid to have fun so you always try to maintain it. You realize that at a certain point that being a comedian, you're paid to have fun. So you always try to maintain like a loose attitude and success. Do you kind of want to expand on that? and some things with some of my peers, which I, you know, just different theories. So I don't want to act like I'm shit talking. But when I started comedy, one of my favorite things to do just in life is talk shit. I love talking trash and having fun.

In general, you know, like, hey, if I'm talking trash about you, I like you. I care about you, but I'm going to say, hey, that joke sucked or, or oh man you bombed the other night like that's what we all like to me one of my the second thing i love more than seeing my friends succeed is watching my friends fail like that's so much fun yeah see like you you love them you know they're great like oh like flair sake who i love so much and i think she's so talented but she's so unique and i think she's so talented but she's so unique and she's so different so i take her to some shows and open for me and i know

they're not gonna love her but it's but i'm like oh let me watch let me see how she goes and then sometimes i love it because she'll see them not loving her and then she'll be like you're wrong i'm awesome get on my level and i and that tells me more than anything from her killing it you know i learned more from that than watching her kill i'm like oh you don't fold you know you're good you know your worth and you you'll be like hey you guys will come on board whenever and um i noticed like especially like when you start getting jobs on, like, sitcoms or things like that, that people didn't want to talk shit anymore. They wanted to act like their sitcoms were awesome or, like, and, of course, I believe in promoting things and never being like, oh, watch me at 8 p.m. on this show. It sucks.

I would never be like that. But, you know, if I remember talking trash about a friend's show and just being like, oh, this show sucks, blah, blah, blah, blah. But my friend is good and they're good. And then they wrote me back and they were like, man, like, why are you ripping the show apart? Why are you doing that? I'm just like, oh, I'm just talking trash. I'm not talking trash about you. He's like, oh, I didn't talk shit about Undateable when that was a shitty show.

And I was like, but you could have. That would have been fine by me. And Undateable was solid. Undateable was good. That shitty show. And I was like, but you could have. That would have been fine by me. And Undateable was solid. Undateable was good. That's what I would have said in return. Solid B-minus B show. How could you hate that hard? But if you wanted to hate, that's fine because then I would have retweeted it.

We could have fun with it. It would have been a game. To me, it's more weird that you hated my show and you never talked shit about it. You told me it was good to my face. Like that's weirder to me. And that's, I think, a thing that happens where some comedians forget about the love and forget about the fun and the mischief of being a comedian. And they fall into like, oh, let me start doing what these people want because they're giving me five figure, six figure salaries or whatever. And I just want to be like, man, I don't want to stop doing what's worked for me.

And that's having fun, being playful, talking shit. And sometimes it made people mad, but I don't think it's ever cost me any money or ever cost me any work. If people know I'm good and if they have an issue, they can come talk to me if if I ever cross the line I'm the first to apologize because I'm not one of those people who are like oh I don't apologize like I test lines so sometimes I gotta apologize but I never want to not have fun and not you know and I learned that from so many of the people who I look up to who I've gotten to work with like from working with Conan and stuff where I see him and like oh man he's such a playful fun unique like I would not like not needy is not like in a negative way but like he wants to make you happy he wants to make you

laugh he wants it's not like you know oh I'm just leaning back and I got a bunch of money like he's like he wants to be involved in the fun. And I always want to be involved in the fun. And I also remember like people like Andy Kendler. And there's even a time when I was like, oh, I'm doing kind of well. And I'm working on, I got this DreamWorks voiceover. Maybe I shouldn't smoke weed because maybe they don't want me to smoke weed. And I was hanging out with Andy Kendler, who I loved my whole life,

you know, pretty pretty much and he's just smoking joint after joint and i smoked weed with him one night that was a big deal for me yeah it's so fun it was a thing to me like man if this guy who is like so respected and like you know so old and he's still having fun and he's still smoking weed and he's still being himself and he's still learning and growing at his age. Like, I don't want to change that. I want to just have fun. I don't want to ever, I always say to my manager or to anyone around me, like, I need to be the least professional part of this operation. Like, I'm pretty professional.

So I come prepared, I come ready. I come all that. But I need to be the least professional part of this whole bit. Everyone else involved needs to be more professional than me. I have to have fun. I have to be able to fuck up. Like, I even got in an argument, one of the few arguments I got with my fiance. We were in Osaka on a little vacation in Japan. And I got asked to go do this open mic and I hadn't done

comedy in like two weeks. And I snuck some edibles into the country and I thought I could just go up like second and bounce out. But of course, unbeknownst to me, they decided to make it like a little showcase where I'm the headliner and all of them are opening for me. So by the time I'm getting ready to go up, I'm high as a kite. And I can't remember a single joke. And I just bomb and my fiance hates it. And she thinks I'm embarrassing her. And then I leave and I go, no, that was fucking awesome. Like, yeah, fun.

That's part of like legend is that like they all thought they were, they were like, like oh man there's some great comedian from the states and like he just ate shit like any other comic yeah and i was like that's fine i'm happy that the other comics that were there they didn't lose any respect for me because they know i'm good you know so it's like this is fun this is not like i'm gonna go up every night and try to get fucked up, especially if I'm getting paid. But if I'm in the middle of Japan on my vacation, that's exactly what I should do.

I think it gives you credibility with your audience too, if you're willing to criticize your peers. And also if you're willing to risk like not being good at times, like my favorite bands, the replacements behind Bruce Springsteen, maybe and half their shows, they were like too fucked up to perform i mean i'm sure i would have been frustrated back then if i would have showed up yeah but it adds to their that's who they wanted to be that was their legacy that they were like not they they would never put the audience expectations above their own need to express themselves yeah i think there's a balance

in that of course and but i think that balance comes with money and obligation. And that's exactly what I told my fiancee that time. I go, hey, if I had said to them, yes, I want to headline your show, then I have an obligation to that audience to perform. I was expecting to just do an open mic, do three minutes, bounce out, whatever. And so like, I'm under no obligation.

I can just go do whatever I want and have fun. And I should not, just because I've, you know, done some things, I should not be held under any other, you know, than any other comedian. Like, you bomb, you succeed, you fail, you get up. And I love that. i don't want people to think i'm perfect i want some comedians in in japan to go like man i saw him he i could do better than that you know that's fine by me because probably you can and that motivates you that's great but it lets me continue to have fun and then gives me a story to tell when I do want to do a show well which is 90% of the time yeah it's funny some of the most fun I've had doing stand-up are those

random bar shows where I'm just bombing horribly and the audience is just looking at me like what the fuck are you doing but inside it it like sparks so much joy because they're just like staring at me and i'm just like just keep talking i'm like i'm just gonna keep serving this up for you yeah you're really good at it though you're like the best you genuinely enjoy like some comedians fake enjoy it where they're like oh it looks like i'm bombing but you can tell on the inside they're dying but with chad he'll be like oh this is going bad and you can feel the joy in his voice and it it makes the whole audience come alive. It's a-

Oh, thanks, man. Yeah, it's a special quality. Yeah, you can give what you got, you know? You can't change it up. You can't all of a sudden, if they don't like, because stand-up in particular, like it feels like when they don't like you,

you're like, they just don't like me. You know, there's nothing I can do. They don't like what I'm about. And so it's not like I can just turn into a different person with a different bag of jokes so at some point you're like look I know what I like I'm gonna I mean that's pretty much how I've been doing comedy in the last two years like this is what I like this is what I think is funny and now I'm not trying to be self-referential or just grandizing or just being like um you know that you you guys didn't watch

that third episode of fucking harley quinn like i did you know i'm not trying to do shit like that but i am trying to do the type of things that make me laugh make me happy spark joy for me and then if you get on board great if you don't i that's fine i'll try to explain it better next time but i'm not going to change my theory. I'm not going to, to me, a lot of stand up and a lot of the way your style is kind of like, you know, different Kung Fu styles. And I believe in my style. I believe in the optimism of it. I believe in the sharpness, the wordplay of it. I believe it is a strong style and I'm not going to switch up and start learning a different style because it's

popular or that's what other people are doing do you change it up at all if you're doing like uh west side versus east side show if you're doing like the store versus Largo no that's that's what I like about me is that no I do the same exact shit I do the same Rugrats show at Largo Rugrats joke that I do at Largo that I do at the Comedy Store. And sometimes it works, sometimes it bombs. But that's what makes me happy is that if I can... Oh, no. Are you still there?

Yeah. Yeah. Okay. It's just my video game wants to play. What makes me happy is that if I can make that Rugrats joke work at the Comedy Store, is that if I can make that Rugrats joke work at the comedy store, then I know it's going to crush when I take it to

Largo or take it to where I'm comfortable, which it used to be like Meltdown or whatever. But so I pride myself on just being like, no, I'm just I'm not going to be like, oh, it's the you know, it's the comedy store belly room or the original room and I'm following Joey Diaz

and fucking Theo theo von so let me try to darken it up or do something like no i'm like no you guys are just about to get the complete opposite of what you just got and sometimes it works sometimes it's refreshing people like it and other times it does not work but you know i'm okay with that do you think audiences there's so much made about like audiences being too pc now have you felt a shift or do you even pay any attention to that or what's your perspective on it i mean it's like it's almost like a self-fulfilling prophecy right like the more that we've said it the more that i've heard regular people saying it like i swear

to god i never heard anyone say it until after dave chappelle was talking about it and then i would go on the road and these ubers and people would be like well you can't do anything anymore how are you you guys can't oh your job must suck you can't say anything anymore and i think the best thing i ever heard about it came from my best friend my feature gave anger and he he the uber driver was like oh how's this being a comedian when you can't say anything anymore and he just goes it's actually all right if you're not a piece of shit i was like that's pretty good that's pretty much it if you're not a shitty person things seem to be okay you don't really run into

that much trouble unless you're courting it you know like i like what go ahead i like i like what jessel nick said too where he because he does edgy stuff and he just said like it just makes me have to write better for my edgy material like exactly you just gotta it just just makes you think an extra level on what you're about to say yeah if it's a good joke people know you know and and sometimes people some a small group of people might hate on it even if it's a good joke but then we know like oh you're a fuddy-duddy you're you're just like a shitty person you don't like having fun but when it's a shitty joke that also aims down at people then you're just kind of like

man what are you doing like you know why are you wasting people's time this is what you want to put out there this you know that's when you run it like you know the shit with ari is like he asked for shit like that he court shit like that and then he got it with his kobe thing yeah yeah that was insane yeah it's not pc it's like that's what you wanted you wanted that attention you got it and hingecliff made a good i thought hingecliff's joke was maybe too edgy but but it was a joke it was like kobe passing i don't believe it but there's a joke there with the kobe thing it was just or with ari's thing it was like it was just straight uh like ugliness yeah well said yeah you're just like what are you even trying to get across here you know whatever

i'm not it's not like i'm calling i wouldn't i like ari either way you know i wouldn't want to i wouldn't leave my a female friend around him but i would but do i hate him not by any means yeah um and then you have a new show on quibi yeah i had to watch to watch it, but it wasn't out yet. How is that, making that? Oh, it's pretty cool. It's called Nice One. It'll be out June 8th on Quibi. Please watch that.

You get a free 14-day trial, because I know it is a hard sell to ask anyone to buy another streaming service. So I just say, get in there at that free 14-day trial, June 8th. Watch all the nice ones. Watch some Reno 911. I think they got other programming. What's the show we were on, Chad, where we reviewed dancing? So You Think You Can Dance? No.

No. America's Next Best Dance? Nah. It's the one where the dance floor like like moves and then they have like huge balls come in to try and take out the dancers it was fun it made me think i'd be like dude i'd love to be a judge on a talent show it's a fun gig you got the look for it oh thank. He was very good at it. You were great at it. Did you watch it? No.

You got to watch it. It's good. You're great on it. The host was really talented. She was good. They got some good shows on Quibi. They're not as old. I say check it out. My show's kind of like at midnight type of deal.

What's that other show? I don't know. Anyway, it's me, three comedians, the game show. I force them to find the positive of bad situations, kind of like my act in general. And then it breaks down into one-on-one compliment battle based off of the boast rattles that Kyle Ayers

was doing. And now it's going to be a show on quibi called nice one so hopefully some people check it out because i would like to get more money and do a second season yeah live touring seems very much in jeopardy and ron i feel like i may have misled you we have a little bit left where we answer listeners questions okay yeah yeah it made me seem like we were done yeah i'm sorry dude i felt that immediately after i let the question go all right here we go what up to my legends of every week your pods literally get me through my daily life with a

high level of stoke, usually. But now I have a big dilemma. This girl I like followed me on the gram, and I want to get it going with her, but here's the prob. I am friends with her father, and he wants more of a righteous person, and I respect him. What do I do? Also, joining a Rager Pong game with you legends is on top of my bucket list. Stay safe, big homies. You want my advice yeah

I mean just from the email it sounds like he's not good enough for her it's just the vibe that I was getting that if you don't think if you he came at him for me if you coming at me with the letter that you already you

don't believe you're worthy for her you don't believe that you're good enough for her dad to believe you were righteous, man. Then don't step to her then. Don't go wasting her time then. Or get yourself together, get righteous, get your life together, and then prove that you're worth it. That's my advice. I love that. You got to know it, man. Know that you're worthy for her. I would just say, I don't know if someone who was actually not good for her would ever question whether they were not good enough for her. You know what I mean? It seems like only a person who—

That's what he wants you to think. You think he's playing me? Am I getting played? Oh, no, dude. Oh, no. Look, I'm going to take it at face value. You think he's playing me? Am I getting played? Oh, no, dude. Oh, no. Look, I'm going to take it at face value. I think he's being for real. I think the fact that you're even initially concerned about her dad's giving you the blessing just to date is cool.

And the fact that you guys are already close means that, I don't know, they must have some kind of relationship so i think just just come at him as uh sturdy as you can be and say look i know i might not seem like the right guy but i'm here to prove to you that i am and then and then take that chance and see what happens i mean she followed him on the gram it looks like i don't know it looks like it's on okay is she watching the stories that's dude good call that's huge yeah no i agree i say cultivate confidence cultivate the righteousness get in there and go after it he says he's friends with the father that's kind of interesting like who's friends with their who's yeah what's that and that makes me wonder what's the age difference between him and the daughter yeah if the age difference is more than like let's say three years

then maybe let it let it let it let it slide all right cold shower order of operation knights of of the stoke table, Dukes of dank, Lords of fly. Get it? Saints of stokenness. One might even say jesters of Dubois. I come to you for the question of method specifically as it pertains to cold showering. Chad, when you cold shower, is it start to finish cold or do you start cold and finish hot or vice versa? Personally, I start hot, get the bathing biz out of the way, and then finish with a nice cool down lap only the likes of you Wim Hof and Troy Casey would appreciate. I know it may seem trivial to some, but this methodic dilemma has been racking my brain for some time.

Thanks for considering my question, all you guys do to make my Stoke cup overflow it. Strider, thank you for putting up with all my Graham DMs. I will try to stop your legend. Shout out to the whole pod crew and fellow Stokers, Ross and Robert. Ross Gartner uh yeah good question i i would say lately i've been trying to fully cold because that's when i feel best and and i like doing that the hard task of getting into the cold shower um and then when i get out that's when i feel like the most uh alive i guess but you know what on some days when i'm just not feeling it i'll get in hot but i always finish cold so i would say try to go all cold but you know if not try to

always finish cold legend have you tried that wrong cold showers yeah occasion i'm not the biggest i love a hot shower i love feeling sleepy i'm into it i know it makes you feel wide awake and refreshed but sometimes i like going through the day ready to get back in the bed that makes me feel good yeah i hear you oh yeah you know a lot of it depends on for me it's like my mood you know sometimes if i'm just you know want to stay relaxed, I'll get in the hot shower and I'll enjoy it. I had that thought earlier where I was like, being healthy only has positives unless you're being so hard on yourself to be healthy that you don't let yourself be human. You've got to have balance.

You've got to. That's why you've got to have a cheat. Even The Rock has his cheat days. What do you think of The Rock, Ron? I love The Rock. He's amazing. Great person. Great human being.

Best wrestler. Works with his ex-wife in a production company. So you know he's humanitarian. How do you do that? How do you go from being together as a bride and then break apart and say, hey, I still love you and respect you enough that you could help run my business and she's here to his trainer right i think so and that sounds crazy too yeah it's all very teetering on incestuous i don't judge the rock i guess i judge it a little i perceive it as like he divorced his wife but he's like but i still can't let you think i'm a bad guy so i'm still gonna hook it up yeah yeah and he's still you know he's doing fine yeah he's killing it he's gonna be president uh what's up stoke lords i have a predicament where

i've been wanting to break up with my lady for a while now but whenever trying to go through with it she starts to cry being a nice guy I feel bad and don't follow through. Is that a simp move? Am I not being assertive? Have you guys been in a similar situation? WWYD. What's up? I'm listening.

I want to know what you guys would do. JT? Yeah, I think it's really hard to break up with someone i've barely been able to do it in the times i've done and i told the story on the pod might come after come out after this one but like one time i tried to break up with someone and she was like no please and i was like okay let's stay together and then she she was thoughtful enough to be like no no we can't stay together just because i convinced you that we should. And that was how we broke up. And then the other time we broke up, it was just like,

it had reached a point where it was like unavoidable. It's really hard. And I wouldn't use words like simp. I don't like any of those words like cuck or simp and all that stuff. It feels like, I don't know, just like lazy ways to make people feel bad. And they just, these words get like put out into the, we're all simps. Like I'm a huge simp.

Everybody's a simp uh at times and and i i'm a cuck too i like cuckled porn but but i don't think that makes me a cuck in all aspects of my life so i don't know dude i don't think it makes you anything i just think you're being weak or not weak but you're having trouble in this one situation you just got to do it. Just break up with her. Yeah. If you don't want to be, I mean, unless you want to be with her, why would you, why? I mean, that seems like the simplest thing. If you don't want to be where you don't want to be where you can't force something that's not there. And in the longterm,

it always does more damage to both you and her. I always look at it like if they're meant to, if we're all meant to find that right person for us, the more, the longer that you keep her in that relationship, always look at it like if they're meant to, if we're all meant to find that right person for us, the more, the longer that you keep her in that relationship, the longer you're keeping her from finding the right person for her. Cause you know, it's not you. And so that's how I always, especially once I had my son, I would date with intention, you know, I could date and not know if I was that into you,

if you were the one for me, but if I knew you weren't, we had to have that conversation of could we keep this casual or do I have to let you go? Yeah. I agree. I think it is really tough to break up with someone. I'm an inherent people pleaser too, so it's difficult for me but you know i like what ron jt said you know it's it's ultimately it ultimately it does more damage to them and it's it's worse for them in the long run if you choose to just stay with them for the sake

of staying with them so yeah i think you just got to bite the bullet and if you stay with them you start to resent them and then you're mad at them all the time that you have to be with them when it's your choice that you're making. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So it's like, it's not going to be fun. All right. Last question. Beer count methods. Sup? It's me again. Your main man, Jack coming out of Dallas, Texas again. I just have a question about something serious, but I'd like to hit you on a less serious subject matter. When you're crushing brews, do you count how many you drink by counting beers you have put down on a coffee table or some sort of surface?

Or do you take a mathematical approach and count how many brews are left in your 30 to figure out how many brews you crush to show off to the ladies, not only how many beers you crush, but also your impressive intellect while under the influence of stoke juice? I'd love to hear your feedback on this and would defuse your methods at my next rager. Thanks, bros. Jack. Dude, I never thought about counting from the 30 rack like that and showing off your knowledge. So I'm definitely going to start doing that now,

but I used to just count on the coffee table. But I like his style of thinking. I think I'm going'm gonna go with more intellectual approach next time to my beer counting this dude is clearly superior to me in his three-dimensional thinking when it comes to beer drinking and how to count it down so yeah i've always been kind of haphazard about it but dog you're a legend dude i love the counting how many beers remain in the can that's how i do it with sometimes if i don't know if i took my bipolar medication at night i just look in the from the

prescription date to when i got it at cvs to how many pills are left in there so i'm about to apply that to my beer drinking too dog so thank you legend i love that and ron you're you're allergic to alcohol right that's true i don't know how no i never i would count it it'd be easy zero or I would be close to death. Is there a way you, cause you like, you like to smoke weed, right? So is there a way you count?

How many bowls I smoke? Yeah. No, I guess if my toes are tangling or not, then I know we, we should stop. Other than that, no,

I don't really count it, but no, never never i don't want to get involved in that okay dude ron i gotta tell you this i don't know why but i know what's tremendous about you just from listening to podcasts um and one time uh rory scoville was talking on pete holmes about doing shrooms and he said he got really scared and he didn't know what to do and he was freaking out and then he said you were the guy who was there and both Rory and Pete agreed that you were the best person to have around if you're freaking out on shrooms which I thought was like the highest praise someone did yeah I definitely remember that I remember that long ago that was way before Rory was and I think he was still dating his current his lady that's his wife and I was married at the

time and it was crazy time and and he kept wanting to go into an ambulance and I was like Rory I'm pretty sure you don't want to do that dude I do that I go to the emergency room when I get too high I think I'm having an aneurysm yeah well we kept it together and we got him through it.

And then he decided he wanted to get married. So it was a good mushroom trip. Oh, he discovered that at the end of that sesh? I think he did. I don't want to speak for him. Oh, sorry. Sorry. That's cool, though.

Wow. Yeah. Sometimes that stuff works out great like that. Yeah, it does. All right. Ron, dude. Yeah. Thanks for coming on yeah good channel you guys it was a fun time yeah i'm talking to you too i think you've done our stand-up show what do you remember that uh we were in the hollywood improv lab yeah yes You don't remember. I do remember.

Do you like the lab? A lot of people won't do it. I saw Joe Rogan one time crush in the main room and then bomb in the lab. I think I heard him later say he'll never do that room again. I mean, the lab to me is like, it's fun. It's like an open mic in Osaka. I don't care if I bomb there like you're supposed to bomb there like it's not yeah it's not a warm place it's like a place to experiment and have fun and talk trash so i like the lab but that's what i use it for i don't go in there hoping to have a

great set but i think that came because like when i started out we had this place called Suki's in Portland and like they just did not listen you just learn to um just work on your rhythm and enjoy yourself on your own set and that's like that's why I like the labs town right I like the original room in the comedy store too because if I get half the laughs that I was expecting and I'm like oh I'm doing pretty good yeah yeah yeah room dynamics are weird like people talk about rooms having energies and I sometimes think it's overstated but then sometimes you bomb in those rooms and you're like I think it's real no some rooms have good good legacies good energy and some rooms do not you know that's one of the

reasons I love the belly room I think it's one of the best rooms because it has this legacy of like where they would stick the women and stick the people where they're like oh we're not we don't know what to do with you and now because of that it has all this positive energy from like you know rosanne and and uh bernhard and all those people that were up there just killing it and nobody paying attention. It's kind of cool. I love it when I go into those rooms. Sweet. Well, thanks, Ron. Do you have a catchphrase to sign off with? Watch Nice One on

Quibi. Or listen to my podcast. That's actually a good catchphrase. Listen to my podcast. That is good a good catchphrase. Listen to my podcast. That is good.

Most of the comedies are catchphrases. And you found a good cadence for it already. Oh, I know how to work my gift. Alright. Thanks again. Great chatting with you. Thanks for having me i'm gonna go eat some dinner have a good all right have a great dinner stay safe you too

my dog that was fun yeah he's fun man he's great yeah aaron you want to come on for our our second half sure sweet that was funies is the best yeah yeah we should talk about his voice I know his laugh is so infectious yeah

I I dude I Blair Saki his feature was my first girlfriend and we dated before we were comedians

oh really and I was gonna say something but then the conversation kept moving and then I was like and I I was like I gotta, but then the conversation kept moving. And then I was like, and I, I was like, I got to bring this up, right. To like be real. But then I was like, the conversation kept moving. I was like, I don't want to just four questions later and be like, I date, I used to date your feature and have nothing to add on top of it.

Yeah. I saw you. I saw you start to say it when he was talking. I don't think he noticed, so he just kept going. You're like, I need to date. Yeah. Well, yeah, she is really good at stand-up too. It's good. It's nice to hear him talk about her like that. She's pretty fearless up there.

Yeah. All right. Chad, do you have your – oh, should we do an ad first oh right yeah i so i so wanted to jump in during the wrestling talk because i i'm such a i'm a big bret hart guy oh really oh yeah dude aaron if you feel that come in man yeah yeah but you're you're right on point dude ecw was if you could find it was the best thing it was the best you get their dvd collections my brother would get them for me for every holiday he's very good gift giver and yeah dude they were the best rob van damme just

incredible taz dude sandman yeah so good yeah yeah i didn't realize you had so much wrestling knowledge i used to geek on it hard dude yeah uh go ahead no that's it that's it well when do you think this episode will come out this week or next week no i was gonna ask you so i was thinking maybe we put this one out on wednesday and then put the bro down on friday yeah sure cool. Guys, I'm interrupting this podcast to let you know once again that we are brought to you by Manscaped. Manscaped, thank you so much for keeping our trims pubed, for looking after our hogs, and making sure that our dongs are looking fresh and clean. Because flowers are blooming, guys. The grass is growing, and it's time to mow your lawn

thanks to our sponsor manscape you can trim the hedges below the belt safely and efficiently i'm talking about ball trimmers exclamation point manscaped is here to make sure your balls are smooth and smell nice after all it's time for some spring cleaning guys that's correct uh let's get the ultimate men's brand dedicated to below the waist grooming they have forever changed grooming game with their perfect package 3.0 precision engineered tools for your family jewels uh you got the lawnmower 3.0 in the perfect package you got the cordless body trimmer you got a ton of other liquid formations to round out your manscaping routine i'm talking baldy owner i'm talking pube management gel uh you know lycra all kinds of good stuff your balls are about to be nick free too they're gonna look so good like it's gonna be people like you know when when people do see your balls you're gonna be like whoa is that like a greek nude and you're like it's a manscape nude uh so jt have you been even

manscaping a little bit dude yeah and i've really you've gotten me super hyped on it now because it's like it's it's like what joe was saying about dressing for the quarantine you want you know what i mean like trim those pubes and just feel like you're, it'll make you feel like we're going to come out of this sooner. You know what I mean? Totally. Yeah. It's about being optimistic in your dome and above your dode. Yeah.

Yeah. You can't, you can't let the Q team get you down and, and, and stop your routine and you can't decay with the Q team. You want to come out of even bigger legend. For sure. When you,

when you went in. So. Be pro-K. Don't DK pro-K. Oh, I love that. the cutie and you want to come out an even bigger legend for sure when you went in so be pro-k don't DK pro-k I love that Aaron how are your balls looking balls are looking great I've even used them I even used I know it's not supposed to be used for your face

but I had this gnarly cutie beard going and I was like I know that my regular beard trimmer if i want to get rid of this hair is going to be a savage so i grabbed the lawnmower and used that to get some of my beard down and then you know then with with a razor later and i love that super happy about it yeah that's good stuff i have heard that ball sweat has sort of anti-aging qualities to it. So I try to use it on my face as much as I can.

Yeah, I've seen you dab it up. And I mean, you look pristine. So it's working, baby. Thank you so much. I think it's as good as ocean water, honestly. And Aaron, I appreciate you treating your ball hair and your facial hair with the same level of reverence for the tools, you know? Yeah, yeah.

You got to and then dude side tangent you got banged up huh you took it you took a dinger oh yeah it's it's part of my babes beeps and legends oh okay cool cool cool yeah we'll start wait wait i gotta do this sorry i just gotta do the code uh guys for a limited time subscribers get two free gifts the shed travel bag and the patented high performance anti-chafing manscape boxer briefs get 20 off plus free shipping with the code go deep 20 manscape.com that's 20 off free shipping manscape.com with the code go deep 20 it's spring baby, and your balls will thank you. Thank you.

It'd be cool if I could be your balls and Strider could be the head of your penis. Why mine? I don't know. It'd be cool if you guys did that for me, too. Oh, okay. Yeah. Yeah, I'd say maybe we could all sort of play different roles. Switch off. Dude, I appreciate you saying that, dude. You're a legend. Yeah. Well, all right, yeah. Yeah, I'd say maybe we could all sort of play different roles. Switch off.

Dude, I appreciate you saying that, dude. You're a legend. Yeah. Well, all right, legend. I appreciate you wanting to be my balls. That means a lot. Yeah, I don't know why I had that thought, but I was like, it'd be cool. Aaron, could you be my bellend? Sure.

Dude, I appreciate you being open to it, Aaron. It's the most sensitive part. That's how I describe myself, so yeah. Hell yeah, dude. The most sensitive part. Nice, dude. That's so sick. That was huge of you to let Aaron be your bellend, dude.

Well, dude, you know, Aaron has a – I mean, you both have such – maybe you both should be the bellend because you have such high emotional IQs that, you know, you can really handle the sensitivity well. Yeah, dude, we could, like, hug together and then mold over together and just form your dode top. Yeah. I think Joe would be the straight-up shaft.

For sure. Yeah. Just no nonsense. Get in there. Get out. Get the blood in when it needs it, you know. That no nonsense. Get in there. Get out. Get the blood in when it needs it. That's Joe. Yeah, I'm Moses, man. I'm water. He's the Pharaoh. He's staring at pyramids. Yeah. Yeah, for sure. All right, sick.

For sure. Chad, who is your beef of the week? All right. Sick. For sure. Chad, who is your beef of the week? My beef of the week is the urge to drill myself nonstop. I mean, I'm in the Q team. I'm in my apartment alone often.

And I try not to drill myself too much because, you know, it messes with my chi. I don't have as much energy. You know, when I drill myself too much, I just, I don't want to do as much. But like, you know, sometimes I'll be sitting on my couch. I'm like, oh, I should write like a soliloquy or something. And then I'll be like, or I could drill myself. And often I end up drilling myself to MILF porn. It's sad how many times it wins that either or.

Yeah. it wins that either or yeah and it's like it's such like uh it's such like a bittersweet thing you know because on the one hand you're like oh cool i have like a lot of uh high levels of tea and high sex drive like i just want to bone all the time yeah but then on the other hand you know it's like well that also also keeps my hand attached to my dough 18 hours out of the day. And the other times are when I'm sleeping. So, yeah, I have a blanket on my couch and it's getting crusty, dude. Damn, dude. Yeah, I like jizzing on hardwood floors. That's my thing.

Really? Yeah. Oh? Yeah. Oh, dude. The girl I've been FaceTime sex talking with, she was like, why do you just come on hard floors? I was like, I don't know, dude. Well, it's good cleanup. Yeah, it's like I try to do it in my hand or in the toilet.

It just feels so mechanical. Yeah. Yeah, I think he developed habits early on so where he jizzes where he jizzes yeah i hope my dad doesn't listen to this because i'm staying at his condo dude that's i heard your dad talking about how he kept slipping ever since you came yeah yeah i know poor guy he's like what's with the JT? What the fuck is going on with the floor? I know. I came upstairs.

His girlfriend was icing his back. And I was like, what happened? He's like, I tried to wake you up this morning. I was like, oh, no, dad. Oh, no. Did he talk about? Did he at least say like, hey, congrats on a pretty big load? Yeah, you know, it's something I wish he'd say, you know.

But he always finds the negative in things. And it's just like, and I'll be like, I hear you I wish he'd say, you know, but he always finds the negative in things and it's just like, and I'll be like, I hear you. I hear you. I shouldn't just be coming all over the floors. Can you, but can you at least acknowledge that it was a heavy load, dad? Like, can you just for once just say, yeah, son, I'm proud of you. Your testicles produce a lot of semen and I'm glad that you're able to ejaculate it confidently. And he doesn't say that. And you know, part of my life and a lot of why I go to therapy is just accepting that you're able to ejaculate it confidently. And he doesn't say that. And part of my life and a lot of why I go to therapy is just accepting that you're not always going to hear the things you think you deserve. Yeah.

Well, this is something you can learn when you have a son and he starts coming on your hardwood floors. Which he will. Which he will, especially your son. He's probably going to be, you know, don't get a basketball court because, so you could be like, you know, to your son, you can be like, here's a Swiffer and nice load. My little power buster, my boy. I think my mom listens to this.

Yeah, yeah, I know. I was just, you know, you got to honor all sides of yourself. Aaron, who's your B for the week? My B for the week is with holes. Dude. The book? I fell into a hole. Oh.

You fell into a hole. I fell into a hole. Sorry to laugh. It's really stupid. It was like back in October, our friends were like, hey, we're getting rid of our patio furniture. Do you guys want it? And we're like, sure.

And then they just like dragged their feet until this week. And my wife's like, hey, you want to go pick up that patio furniture now? I'm like, during a global pandemic, take stuff from other people? Not really my thing. But okay, we'll do it. So we run a U-Haul, we go down there. We're obviously trying to be socially distant, but we're also picking up someone else's goods.

And so they had us walk through the side of their house, which is smart rather than be exposed to whatever germs they might have and who they've come in contact with but they had us walk through the side of the house which was super tight there was like a rake standing up i thought that was going to cartoonishly hit me in the face and then uh there was also this three three foot by three foot that almost went, like covered more than half of the walkway, was this hole that was lined with bricks where their crawl space was. So you'd get underneath the house

and do maintenance or whatever if it needed it. And so I'm carrying the first piece of furniture, like this wicker chair, piece of furniture like this wicker um you know chair piece of a chair and i just fucking i mean luckily i missed the like if i'd hit the lip and then i'd gone face first into the chair i was holding or something like it'd be terrible but instead i just went like straight down all my way onto my left leg i hit my thigh like right mid thigh hit the bricks that are around this thing and gave myself the most wicked dead leg so i couldn't tell how bad it was and i twisted my ankle too did you make a noise oh yeah yeah my wife was like three steps

behind me so she was freaking out and i was freaking out what was the noise i don't i don't even know i just i just know the feeling of terror like did i just break my leg like at 37 years old did i almost you know am i ever going to play softball again like that sort of stuff yeah Yeah. Through my head, you know? So I pulled myself out of there and then, you know, she's freaking out. What do you, what do you need?

What do you want me to do? And I'm just like, I don't know. Just let me try to sit down. Cause I was kind of, I was on all four. So like I'm on my legs still. And then I sit down.

And then it takes like five whole minutes at least for me to regain feeling. And thankfully I was like, no, I can, I can move my ankle. And I know what it feels like when you break a bone. So this, this isn't it, thankfully, but it was gnarly. And then it's like, okay, I can't lift any more of this furniture. Yeah. Yeah. The mission has changed.

Yeah. Yeah. And then unfortunately the folks who were giving it to us were like, okay, I mean, they picked up the slack, but it was still like, Oh,

I was so worried about that stupid rake doing a Tom and Jerry and hit me in the face. Right. That as soon as I got that out of the way, I like didn't even think about the fact there was this giant hole. Then I just, you know, I was walking at a pretty brisk pace

and just boom, right into this hole. It's like in Saving Private Ryan where the dude catches the bullet off the helmet. He's like, whoa, my helmet blocked that bullet. And then a second bullet hits him in the head. Exactly. It's exactly what it was like as traumatic and dramatic

yeah that's the worst feeling when you when you when you unknowingly drop even if it's like a foot yeah when he that drop you're like you're like what the fuck yeah when you miss a stair it's like yeah god like it messes up your whole day i mean like carlin has a whole bit about like missing the curb or whatever uh when you're walking down the street and trying to play that off yeah the shock the shock alarm that your brain gets when you miss a step you're just like and you feel your brain's expecting surface and you you don't have surface you're in open air it's a it's it's alarming yeah yeah so i just yeah it took

oh i just went you know went down a flight basically in in 0.0 seconds and and and smash my thigh into it. But thankfully it's just, it's just swollen. It's bruised. My ankle swollen, but nothing, I don't think anything too bad has happened.

I've just been taking ibuprofen and using CBD stuff to treat it. So nice. Oh, and, and my friend treat itself. Nice. Oh, and, and my friend who's this happened at, like they're super, this was in Brentwood and they're super high powered lawyers in LA. Oh,

really? Like, um, I mean, not that I would sue a friend cause that's ridiculous and it was an accident, but like no recall. I would never,

I would have no chance it'd be like falling at disney like nope yeah yeah disney's locked down with that that's so funny um i'm sorry no chad go chad go go go i was i was like thinking i was like did when disney opens i'm fucking there because there's going to be no lines. I'm just going to cruise. Just go solo. Only put myself at risk. I'm going to quarantine for 14 days.

I'm hitting Space Mountain. I'm getting in there hard. Nice, dude. You got to hit the new Star Wars. Yeah, Rise of the Resistance. Do they have Marvel stuff there yet no and i'm it's it's really um i think they're creating a land like it's on separate land yeah like a spider-man land which is so lame that's so not disney yeah it's not gonna fit with the rest of it right no that's

not bob agger's like yeah we're gonna have spider-man i'm like dude get the fuck out of here like you know beef it up twice dude give him a beef of the week that is my beef why are you putting spider-man and fucking disneyland it doesn't work it's it it upsets me so much it's like it feels like a universal studios thing totally yeah it's i will not go into that land I will you know it's a little sacrilege right

very sacrilege you know I think I think Star Wars works because they always had star tours and then it's just like you can make a land out of Star Wars that's really fun but when you put Spider-Man in there it's like what you're gonna make like new york city which would actually be cool if they made like a little new york city but like

also you know go fuck yourself yeah i agree it's weird they don't they don't work no i hear you my beef of the week is uh something that uh r Ron mentioned earlier that we talked about, PC culture. No, I'm not talking about politically correct culture. I'm talking about people on their PCs playing me in Call of Duty. Oh. Dude. Look, you know, I want to be open and welcome to all, but Xbox should play against Xbox. PlayStation should play against PlayStation.

And even if those two cross pollinate, it's all right. Cause it's similar systems, but the PC people, you got to find your own war zone. You got to find your own multiplayer. All right. Cause it operates quicker.

You're slip sliding away. Every time you got quicker reaction times. And here's the thing. If we were on equal sticks, I think I would take you down. You know what I mean? Even though I got some lag at my dad's house. So I Amazon to wifi extender, some lag at my dad's house,

so I Amazoned a Wi-Fi extender. But it's just gotten to a point where I'm in the gulag, and I know if I'm playing a PC guy, I can see it right away in their movements. And all respect to them, but there's enough of you. Go have your own game. Are they better because they're on PC? Yeah they're a little bit quicker i think i think they have i think it's a little bit quicker on a pc yeah why is it because the mouse i think the

controls are easier yeah the mouse is quicker yeah look i'm i'm a neophyte when it comes to stuff and i'm sure i'm gonna get a lot of blowback you know what i mean i mean i'm walking into a fucking landmine storm with this commentary but i gotta i gotta be true i mean i mean i'm walking into a fucking landmine storm with this commentary but i gotta i gotta be true to who i am i'm an xbox guy my friend ferraro was playing on a playstation so we had to use activision to team up to play multiplayer and we peer pressured him into getting an xbox xbox baby i love it chad who's your babe of the week my baby of the week is the oven uh dude i just started using an oven last week whoa totally changed my game i'm making salmon i'm i'm i mean i baked some sweet potato i put some asparagus in there. You know, I'm just really, you know, my cooking is very utilitarian.

Like I just, you know, it's very basic. I'm not looking to do recipes, but I like how I can just get a pan, throw a salmon on there, then some sweet potato, then some asparagus, then, you know, maybe some chicken nuggets if I'm feeling randy. And I just, I love ovens, you know i like i wasn't aware of them until last week and they they're a huge game changer so uh what up to ovens you're my babe fire babe aaron who's your babe this is super weird uh but I was watching The Last Dance. I was watching The Last Dance.

And at the very beginning is when they go to, like, Europe. The Bulls go to Europe for, like, an exhibition. And there's a girl in there that gets interviewed. And they're like, who are you here to see? And the girl obviously goes, Michael Jordan. But the way that she says it with her accent, she says, Michael Jordan. I must have seen that when I was a kid, because that's how I've said his name ever since then.

So to finally have it catch up and see where the reference came from again, as part of the last dance, is amazing. So that Italian girl, or Italian or French, and see where the reference came from again. Interesting. As part of the last dance. It was amazing. So that Italian girl, or Italian or French, I think they went to Paris, is my babe of the week. Nice. Cool babe, dude. That was romantic.

It was romantic without being romantic, which I dig. Yeah. Dude, my babe of the week is bacon. Nice. I eat bacon a a lot i don't make it much i'm at my dad's place i'm going through his fridge he's got bacon nice thick cuts of it i throw it on the pan i start cooking up bacon i haven't done this in a dog's age i'm just looking at these things sizzle getting them brown on both sides and i'm just excited as fuck i love how no piece is the same you know some lie. Some are kind of crinkled.

You'd wish they'd brown more evenly. But hey, that's bacon, baby. And then afterwards, it's a delicious meal. No carbohydrates. Probably fucks with the cholesterol a little bit. But you know, I watch what I eat. So I think I'm okay. And I just think, is there anything better than bacon?

Nah. Nah. Bacon, baby. Bacon. You can also do it in the oven is it good in the oven is it better in the oven than off the than off the pan i think so wow wow takes a little longer obviously a lot of things that are better do yeah that's huge i might do that right after this pod. I might make more bacon after this. I saw a video of Laird eating bacon and drinking coffee.

Is that it? I was like, that's it right there. That's the winning combo. Yeah. And what did he do afterwards? He rescued a town from nuclear annihilation or something? That, but I think he also wrestled a jaguar. Oh, that's nice, nice dude nice warm-up uh chad who is your legend of the week uh my legend of the week is sweet potato dude nice i'm fired up on sweet potato at the moment you know i i uh during the key team i've been working out hard

you know and i try to try to limit my carbs. But you got to listen to your body, you know. Your body tells you things in the form of fatigue or all kinds of shit where it can say, dude, give me some of this. And I noticed that if I did a really hard workout and I eat like, you know, just like protein afterwards, my body would be like, dude, I'm not digging this. I need carbs. And I was like, I hear you, but, you know, I've sworn off carbs.

But then I was like, you know what? But what about sweet potato? That's a cool carb. So I've compromised, give my body what it wants, sweet potato, put them in the oven. That's my babe. Bake them up and I eat them and everyone's happy superfood dude yeah they're so good it's crazy to me how sweet they are and that they're still good for you right yeah they're so good then when you bake them up in the oven and they just like they're like crispy but crispy, they're amazing.

Yeah, sweet potatoes are amazing. Our yams are kind of not quite there though, right? I think so. I'm not sure. I've never really known what to do. Sometimes you're like, dude, why are you giving these different names? Yeah. And sometimes they're different colors.

When a sweet potato doesn't have that nice orange color when it's a little bit lighter. Yeah. Yeah. I'm a little racist. Yeah. If it's lighter, I'm like, I don't like it as much. Darker the berry, the sweeter the juice. Dude.

That's so true. So true. So true, dude. What I said. So true. So true, dude. What I said. Dude, what you said?

No, what you said, dude. When you said it was so true, that was so true, dude. All this talk is so true. That's real. So real. Aaron, who's your legend of the week? My legend of the week is the Stokers oh nice dude I've been getting a lot of nice like really super sweet DMs

when I posted the photo of falling in a hole like I got a nice get well soon from one of the Stokers just all around just been such a positive experience and showing my face on this podcast. That's awesome. One guy made fun of me.

I had to shut that guy down. Did you clap back? Or did you block him? Oh, yeah. No, I clapped back. Nice, dude. Yeah. All right. Dude, that's awesome, Aaron. I get a lot of messages from stokers just

being like dude aaron's the fucking man yeah um very beloved yep thank you guys i've got two legends of the week and it's with a heavy heart um my first legend of the week is uh khabib ner margina menoff i'm so sorry i butchered that when it's a serious thing I'm trying to say. But his father, Abdul Manap Nurgun Mennoff, got coronavirus. He's in critical condition. He had a heart surgery a couple years ago, and then the coronavirus got to his heart. And I guess he's out of a coma, but he's not speaking. And Khabib is probably the most dominant fighter in the UFC. He's a Sambo specialist from Russia. He's 28 and 0. He manhandles everyone. And his hero and his kind of guiding force is his dad. His dad trains him. And I'm a huge fan. So I follow Khabib closely. I watch as much content of him as I can. And

seeing the way his dad has raised him to be a good, strong fighter and also a person is really inspiring. And it's just sad to see such a cool guy struggle like uh it could be wrestled bears when he was like 12 his dad would give him baby it gave him a baby bear to wrestle it's it's amazing and like and then um when khabib got in trouble for jumping out of the ring after he beat connor and trying to fight connor's posse at the press conference afterwards he he the thing he was most ashamed of and ring after he beat connor and trying to fight connor's posse at the press conference afterwards he he the thing he was most ashamed of and the thing he was most worried about was his dad he goes i know when i go home to dagestan my father will smash me for this i know he will

smash me and he was like super bummed out so he wasn't even worried about like the cops or dana white or any of that stuff he's worried about his dad and he just that level of respect i just i really admire and appreciate and speaks to his father and then the last thing i saw khabib was arguing with some like henry cejudo and uh some good wrestlers from the ufc talking about what's better judo or wrestling and all the wrestlers were like wrestling's better and khabib khabib's a man he's like one of the best fighters in history and he's like if my father hears you say wrestling better than judo my father would be very upset like and it's it's it's just beautiful and i'm sorry to see the guy struggle and then my other legend of the week is very sad is uh lynn shelton

um the director she passed away um she was an awesome director she did super small like uh mumblecore movies uh the one that was most special to me was hump day came out in 2009 is when i was first getting into film and stuff, and it really inspired me. It was about two guys, Mark Duplass plays one of them, who have a super close relationship and then are trying to decide if they want to make their own short film together where they go gay together for a film festival. And it was a really good, incisive look at male friendship,

and it really shaped my sensibility about art and stuff. And so it's a tragic loss. She was super young. She just had some random blood disorder that popped up out of nowhere. And it's just really, really sad. Life is fragile, but it's still inspiring because she lived her life well and she put out a lot of great art and inspired a lot of people. And I didn't know her, but I saw her at the comedy store once. She dated Marc Maron and she was watching Marc's set. And we were sitting next to each other in those back booths that you know they you can sit in and she had such a positive energy she was cracking up the whole time and she just she looked like she really enjoyed uh she she looked like she was really

enjoying that moment and it made me feel like that's probably why she was a good director and stuff is that she probably enjoyed it and made people around her feel like they were part of something fun. So yeah, I'm just sorry to lose her. So yeah. Rest in peace, Lynn Shelton.

Yeah. I think, I think she directed an episode of new girl that Ron was on and he posted something about like how she made him like, he wasn't, it didn't seem like maybe he was that cool with the bit they were going to have him do on the show. And,

and she, It didn't seem like maybe he was that cool with the bit they were going to have him do on the show. And she totally took the time and made him feel right about it and smoothed everything over for him and was focused on making sure he was okay before going forward. Yeah, she got great performances. She seemed like she was a real actor's director. Yeah. And she directed Gl and like um little fires everywhere she's really very uh impressive career so yeah it's too bad yeah yeah yeah i read

about that uh yesterday or today it's so sad yeah it's a bummer um chat do you have a quote of the week yeah i do uh i was reading uh ryan Holiday's book, The Obstacle is the Way. He's a beast. I wish I had read more of his stuff before we interviewed him because I love his stuff. Let's get him back. Yeah. So in the book, he talks about Teddy Roosevelt.

And Teddy Roosevelt was born with a debilitating asthma was he was born with debilitating asthma as a youth as a kid and uh basically he couldn't do anything he couldn't like run or anything it would just like if he if he ran it would he'd be bedridden for weeks is really bad um and so at one point his father said to him, he's like, Theodore, you've got the mind, but you haven't got the body. I'm giving you the tools to make your body. It's going to be hard drudgery, but I think you have the determination to go through with it.

Teddy Roosevelt responds, I'll make my body. That's my quote that's awesome and he did dude he did he was just cranking it out and by the time

he was in his 20s asthma was gone he beat it down you're making me switch my quote I love that that's fire dude Theodore

very impressive man yeah he was notorious for like taking other world leaders would come visit and he'd be like, let's go on a hike. And then he'd just work the shit out of them on a hike. Oh, I love that. Yeah. That's like when Don Draper makes Sterling Cooper climb the stairs

after they have like an oyster lunch so he pukes in front of their new clients. It's like, let's see if you can keep up physically dude let's see if you're a real man man um aaron what's your quote of the week my quote of the week is uh from the aforementioned michael jordan the greatest uh i can accept failure everyone fails at something but i can't accept not trying. Dude, honestly, I put Jordan and Theodore too on the same level. In terms of just like refusal to give up quick.

I'm actually doing a Kid Rock lyric right now. Now there's 10 million motherfuckers on my dick. Not as much the second part, but yeah. Sorry. i do think both those guys are two of the most determined people ever right oh yeah yeah totally all right so my quote of the week i switched it is going to be theodore roosevelt's poem the man in the arena and uh actually this this reminds me of chad a lot actually oh dude you're too kind no it's true it's true because i was thinking about this poem the other day and i was like it reminds me of chad

i was like it is not the critic who counts not I was thinking about this poem the other day and I was like, it reminds me of Chad. I was like, it is not the critic who counts, not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles or where the doer of deeds could have done better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly, who errs, who comes short again and again because there is no effort without error and shortcoming. But who does actually strive to do the deeds? Who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions? Who spends himself in a worthy cause? Who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement? And who at the worst, if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly. So that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat. Dude, that's epic.

Yeah, beast stuff. If there's anything I've learned from books and stuff, it's just get out there and do it. And get out there. And have fun. Yeah, it's cool that it's in books. You read a book, you're sitting at home, and it's like, go get after it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

John Harbaugh, theimore ravens coach one time read that poem after uh joe flacco had a good game he had been struggling and then he comes out he goes joe flacco's the man in the arena it's not the doer of doers who was criticized and he like rips it off real good yeah yeah fired up i was like hell yeah that's a good head coach yeah i recommend watching on youtube it's a fun clip yeah but yeah it's a good life philosophy all right chad what's your phrase of the week for getting after it uh this is because i wore a board shorts to the beach this weekend i'm trunking it no maybe this is more action let's trunk it i've appreciated that shift you've made to making it more actionable oh thanks yeah at a certain point i'm like wait this is to get after it

that's a verb yeah that is true too it's like you want it to be that's going to alter mine as well man yeah uh aaron what's yours mine is just inspired by the great michael jordan is just let's smoke cigars every day yeah dude i've been begging my dad to watch the michael jordan duck i'm like you have to watch it dad it's the most he's the most compelling figure 100 in like human history you have to watch him he's incredible yeah Yeah. It's just like, I could watch that guy forever. Anytime it goes to someone else, I'm like, just go back to Michael, dude. My phrase of the week for getting after it is a phrase my dad says in movies when the chief good guy in an action movie annihilates the bad guy.

If he blows the bad guy's head off, my dad just goes, sayonara! And he screams that at the TV. tv and it just i love when my dad gets fired up watching stuff that it makes me so pumped i showed him f1 driving to survive and some guy blew by another guy my dad dropped a sayonara and i was like hell yeah so sayonara means goodbye but i'll make it more actionable let's sayonara let's goodbye yeah that's awesome dude yeah i saw that on your story. Your dad's watching. He's like, yeah, he's not fucking around now.

He was pumped up, dude. He loves Max Verstappen. Yeah, Max is a dog out there, dude. Dude, by the way, you're looking jacked. Oh, you saw my Instagram story of me shirtless? Yeah. You're toned. Dude, a lot of it was the lighting but thank you man i've been getting after it super hard and i'm just trying to be as uh i got all this free time i got my kettlebells i'm just trying to yeah thank you man yeah that was fun yeah super fun aaron great stuff man i hope you're feeling better dude yeah i am yeah stay up um okay i'm gonna hit stop perfect

hey what up guys jt here i just had to add a quick addendum to something that was covered on the pod uh i mentioned that when i play with my bros in warzone i'll say to them oh are we playing uh hide and wait again and then ron was like oh, you got to play with some guys who are more aggressive, you know, because it's all about getting out there and killing people. And I should have told him then that my friends do do that and that I was just more picking on the game of Warzone and that I have friends who, you know, get double digit kills in a routine Warzone game. And I should have stood up for them then and cleared the record record but it felt like it would have stymied the conversation but i'm saying now my my dogs you

guys you guys bring the fight to the other side in war zone all right if you need advice We'll see you next time.