Going Deep with Chad and JT - EP 434 - STRIDER WILSON joins for HOT TAKES

Episode Date: April 8, 2026

Today we are joined by LORD T-DART aka Strider Wilson for another EPIC HOT TAKES episode. We start off the pod talking about the verbal gymnastics you have to do when your wife calls another lady hot. Do you agree or disagree? Are soccer Haircuts the worst of any sport? Strider admits he's never been a fan of Ronaldo's hair but Messi's is chill. The Bros also dive into ALIENS and if signs are pointing to them visiting Earth or is it all a distraction tactic. We also call PAUL from JT's fantasy group to settle some beef. Things get heated but it turns into a brilliant tennis match of words. LET US KNOW IN THE COMMENTS WHO WAS RIGHT! We are live streaming a fully unedited version of the pod on Twitch, if you want to chat with us while we're recording, follow here: https://www.twitch.tv/chadandjtgodeepGrab some dank merch here:https://appreeshapparel.com/Come see us on Tour! Get your tix - https://www.chadandjt.comTEXT OR CALL the hotline with your issue or question: 323-418-2019(Start with where you're from and name for best possible advice)Check out the reddit for some dank convo: https://www.reddit.com/r/ChadGoesDeep/Thanks to our Sponsors:HIMS: The Best Hair Loss solutions for men. Go to https://www.hims.com/godeep and get started today with an online consult with a professional.MOMENTOUS: High Quality Supplements - get 35% off today - Go to https://www.livemomentous.com And use promo code “godeep” at checkout.PRODUCTION & EDITS BY: Jake RohretSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Yeah, we've had this issue. So, you know, we do the show where we get sad guys stoked. And we cast a guy yesterday. He's super nice guy, Melvin, really likable, funny. And he was like, yeah, I just like, I haven't been with anyone in like 10 years. We're like, oh, dude, we'll help you get out there. But this would be great. And then a couple days before, he, like, sends us some info. And we're reading and we're like, wait, is he gay? And like on the call, he talked about chicks. Or maybe we just. I just assumed he was talking shit. Yeah. That's my fault. Then we're like, oh, that's cool. Fun, working with a gay person. Let's help him out.

You know, get him some ass. And then he shows up on the day he's like super personable, very outgoing, really artigued. He's a great guy. But then it turns out he fucks all the time. What? So he's just lying? No, he's just like, I haven't been around. He's looking for love.

He's like, I haven't been a relationship. But we had built the whole day around this. guy being like a not getting ass like a monk but he was like no he used to bang like five people in a week you're like it's a lot great dude dude honestly might have been my favorite of everyone we he's awesome super smart he got it he was like really trying to help us out he was down for anything successful just a cool guy i can't wait to watch this up and I want to see what you guys helped him with. We basically just hung out.

Yeah, he's like, let's just chill. We did pole dancing. That was... That's tough. So hard. It's a lot... I have so much respect for strippers. That's like serious, serious strength.

Oh, yeah. Bro, I already had so much respect for strippers. Yeah. True. But now you've got to respect actually, you know, like... They're athletes. Yeah, they're athletes. They're athletes.

That was the shift. They're incredible athletes. Our teacher, she's a rock climber. I don't even know what I thought before going into it about pole dancing. I guess I just thought, I didn't think about the athletic factor. I just thought it was sexy. And you know me, you know, I'll take any chance I can to be sexy. Oh, yeah.

You were good. You crushed it. You climbed to the top of that pole. But you had great rotay. Oh, thanks. Does it hurt your skin? Are you for real right now or you just gasped me up? No, I'm for real.

Thanks. Because I'll be real about this. When I saw you rotating, if you watched the head, I'd get pissed. You did like a great spin. I'm like, wait, where am I supposed to put my hands? Dude, it is tough. And it's like, and this is going through my head is like the danger factor is pretty high. And, you know, JT, you were asking about injuries.

All I could think about is when she's like, we could go in verse. If you want, when you go inverted, if you drop, you could break your neck. Yeah, you could die. She said someone did die at a competition. Yeah. He had a heart attack. A heart attack. I was a dude watching.

He got so horny. You know, I went to a talk about a challenge. My dank-ass wife had a friend who was in a pole dancing class, and then they had a pole dancing class show. Like, you know, when you do an improv class, come to my class show. And you're like, oh, man, I got to go support my friend. I was told my wife, yeah, we'll go support your friend. That sounds nice.

Let's go support her. But then you get there in a reality, you're sitting in front row watching your wife's like friend and you got to be like, you really have to lean into the athleticism. You really have to talk about like, wow, excellent rotation there. Before I was on Wikipedia, Googling terms, I was like, that was a nice drop spindle. Oh, you know what that is? How do you know what that is? Oh, I looked at a dog.

So it was tough to enjoy. Yeah, is it polite to objectify when that is the mission? Yeah. And I was invited to this and I appreciated the performance, you know? You did great out there. I would have given you a lot of money, potentially made a mistake that I regretted for the rest of my life. Yeah, I could have used that money in singles

because you still were throwing singles at this. At the contest? No, it was just a show, just a show, just no contest, no winner, just everyone goes up and expresses themselves. So what's the etiquette? Did you throw singles? Yeah. Yeah. And I kind of hung towards the back during other performances than it was when it was my wife's friend. She was like, no, let's go up. Because, you know, it's kind of like when you're first doing comedy, like you do want to give energy. And as a performer, I get that. Like even if I'm going up and having a bad show and even if the moves that I'm seeing on the pole are really lackluster compared to the previous lady that I don't know, you still got to go up and woo and bring the energy. And I wore two sets of jeans. Two cues. Okay.

That's, yeah, that's related to, did you pop wood? Yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah.

That's interesting to me. You didn't go, you didn't go to the show already having a boner? Yeah. When I got there, I was so Zen focused to not have a boner going in

because the imagination is so powerful. Yeah. Fear and horniness are the most powerful things produced by the imagination. When you're going to bed at night, what's going to get me, what's in my closet?

closet and then when you're going to go to a pole dancing class show with your wife what am i going to see what moves are the boots going to clap that no that click noise of the boots you know what i mean the loud click noise and then the streak coming down the pole like an underarmor commercial that's exactly it i believe the foli artists did go to cheetahs to capture the noises for the click clack protect this house and you know i had to protect my boner from being seen so So I didn't go and torqued up only because I was really zend out, you know, just focusing on, you know, I would like focus on my bank account, I would focus on stuff that stressed me out. Well, I have work tomorrow.

I have to, you know, go to a brunch. That's stressful. Yeah. Another worst thing going to a brunch. Did you make it rain? I did. I brought a lot of singles. And then after the class show, I told my wife, hey, I'm going to stick around for a bit.

I'll catch you later. Supportive. Yeah. I said, yeah, I'm going to watch a few class shows. A lot of people need to be supportive. She was like, but my mom, my parents are in town. We have dinner plans. He said, have fun.

And, you know, this kind of, I've always wondered about this. And I think I know the right answer, but I'm just, I want to ask you guys, when your girlfriend or wife says she's so hot. This is a trap. Well, here's the thing. It's a tough question because she knows you're a dude. And if she is hot and you say, no, she's not hot, she knows you're lying. But then if you do say she's hot, is she allowed to get mad at you?

Yeah. Yeah. You have to really be able to do that mental jiu-jitsu. And the phrasing is you go, because you can't deny. You'll be lying if you say it because, of course, she's only going to say that about a hot lady. you have to say yeah but not as hot as you and she goes you're lying you go no i'm not i'm serious so you do have to lie but it comes in the second turn and is the inverse if she said if you were talking about one of your homies which i'm sure you would on the gas up you're like bro he's a really

good looking guy what would you want her to say i think i'd want her to say yeah he is but let's go fuck. I gotta say that's a really good answer. And I think next time she's like, oh, my friend's so hot, be like, yeah, she is, but let's go fuck. Dude, yeah, I'm glad I brought this up because you just brought up the right answer to that quesh. But you brought it up.

Dude. That's a way better answer than what I said. You just Miyagied me into that. I don't know, dude. I'm just showing. Dude, I, um, what was I going to say? Oh, yeah, my fiance wanted to see Wuthering Heights.

Damn. She's like, I just find Jacob Allorty so attractive. And I was on a hike. And I was like, yeah. It's like a little jab in the stomach. Yeah, I just find him so attractive. I'm like, in a media I was like, well,

I would totally eat Marco Robbie's ass. That I think was a little too... It's a big shot back. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm working on it. I think the more destabilizing thing... I mean, we've all been there. I think the more just stabilizing thing to do

is if she's like, Jacob Allorty's hot, you go, yeah, I want to suck his dick. Right. And then just keep talking about it until next time she sees Jacob Allorty, that's what she thinks about. Oh, yeah.

Because you're like, I just want to suck his dick and then tongue his ass and then I want to live with them for a couple months and make each other breakfast and give each other little cute kisses on the lips with our butts out. That's nice.

Yeah, so here's the thing. Yeah, here's, and two, to really kind of put her in a weird spot mentally is, yeah, and I want to suck his dick. By the way, are we still on for Lizaania tonight? You said you're going to make it. You immediately change topic, so you can't discuss it.

She can't block both streams. Yeah. And you know, you have to gauge how hot she really thinks he is. So you have to go, oh, well, would you even rusty trombone him? And she might not know what that is. And you have to explain, oh, if you think he's so hot, then would you tongue his ass while you reach around and jerk like you're playing the trombone with his wiener and butt?

And she might go, oh, that's disgusting. And then you go, you don't even think he's hot then. or that's a Faustian bargain brother because what if your chick is a freaking Harley Davidson and says yeah then you know that then you have to employ these tactics then you that's when you gauge and you go oh well I would like to do that too then she that's her now she's finger cuffed so we have the rusty trombone that's where you're you know but if you're doing it to a female is that the rusty trumpet? Maybe it's like a French horn.

I feel like it's like the French horn. Dude, yeah, good call. Yeah, trumpet maybe two actually. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Trumpet's probably right. Yeah, because there's three buttons. Yes. So that could be the urethra, the clit, and the vulva.

Chad, good call. Guys, welcome to the chin. Yeah, I'm sorry, I was going to, I was like, it's vulva, the full vagina. or is the vagina? I don't know. Jay, can we pull that up? Yeah, just search vagina.

Nice. Yeah, go to the images. It's about time we find it. It's about time we find this out. That's scientific. Wow. Very nice. Mon's pubis.

Go to that one. Exactly. Good instincts, dude. Oh, no. So it looks like the vulva. Hmm. isn't the whole vagina. The vagina is the opening.

The vagina's the tube. Thank you, Mom Lim. The vulva is a subsection of the vagina, which is the whole enchilada. Well, so Mom Lem here is saying that women think about having kids with a dude and getting married. They don't think physically usually. Whoa. I don't think that's always.

always true actually so so when you're I've been so then when your wife says I think Jacob a Lordy's so hot what she's really saying is I want to have a wife I want to have a family and kids with this dude that hurts you that hurts way more so that hurts more interesting so that's what that means then so I so I don't have to then ask if she would rusty trombone that yeah maybe maybe we're just venturing way out of male territory. Yeah. Because, I mean,

women have to think about rusty trombones, right? Yeah. I mean, of course. Comedian chicks, dude. I'll be in the green room sometimes and they'll be getting raunch on it. Yeah.

They'll be like, I'm dating his 27-year-old. He's fucking made a rock and he just spins me around and fucks me stupid. And then you're like, hey, you're up in five. I'm like, what do you want for your intro? Yeah. Say, uh, so it performs all around town.

Yeah. Say I was on a, You see him on Amazon Next in 2008. That was so funny early on, like your credits. You'd be like, if you were like, you're just desperate for credits because he thought they mattered so much. You'd be like, you're like an extra on road rules or whatever, extra on Pimp My Ride or something. But you've seen this guy on MTV. Yeah.

You've seen this guy on Comedy Central. Like, what were you in Comedy Central? Oh, I watched the taping of, I watched the taping of Key & Peel. Dude, one of my favorite intros was when a guy would bring someone up. I remember this host would use this joke. You've seen Leno. You've seen Letterman. You've seen Conan.

Well, so is this next guy. And then they bring him up. Who does that? I don't remember. Some host back in the day, I always liked it. Should we dive into the hot takes? I think we should, guys. We're doing a hot take episode.

So the way it works is we each send one another five topics. And then we select three of those topics for a hot take. So you're going to hear five to six hot takes from each of us. I love it. Strider, do you want to kick us off? Okay, I'll quick us off with one that's quick just to get us going. I think, Chad, you sent me this. I forget what an order I put these down in.

But just a quick hot take. Soccer, worst haircuts in any professional sport. Whoa. I think the players have the worst hairstyles of any professional athlete in any other sports. Yeah, there you go. And obviously, yeah. Do you think,

I arrest my kiss. This one guy goes truth to me. Maybe that's a purely functional one for like headering the ball, but I mean, bro. I even hate Ronaldo's haircuts. Really? Yeah. Well, so that I was going to say, and that became a very popular, like maybe the most popular male hairstyle in el Mundo do you do you hate that hair cut yes you just said that I'm sorry

I hate it no but I want to get you clear I hate it um why do I hate it maybe because it's a wannabe hairstyle um I don't like also I'm really against just because of my own bad hair the really tight on the side look with the come over um also I'm like dude you're already professional athlete You don't have to do anything. You're so right. Dude, when you see that haircut, it's not even like, oh, you're trying to be a soccer player. That's not the wannabe. That haircut literally on its own screams wannabe.

Yes. It screams I'm trying too hard. Look at me. Look at me. Let me stand out even more. Dude, you're already Cristiano Ronaldo. And I want to be sexy. I'm trying to be the sexiest man alive, which is always a little bit not sexy.

You can't be trying. It's got to come to you. Which is why I think Lionel Messi is the sexiest soccer player and he's got great hair. it doesn't look like he's worried about his looks at all. Nope. That's a great hair. Wow. Does that fade right there.

I don't love it, but, but, you know what? I hate it. But Beck? I hate that hair. That I like. That I like. What was, they looked the same? No, no, no.

Go to the other poof. That poof. But what about Beckham? Oh. Very handsome. Very handsome. Very handsome. But he's done mohawks.

He's done. Here's the thing. If you were any of these dudes older brothers and they, they came home with his haircut, immediate dead arm. Do you think David Beckham's buzz cut was trying too hard? No, I like that. I'm in for a buzz cut. Because he has those rigid jaw lines.

I think he should always have a nice buzz cut. But contextually, he was so known for the long flow that for him to come out, world famous, for him to come out with the buzz cut statement heavy. Yeah, it's kind of spinning in our faces. It's like when Brad Pitt would grow a big beard or something like, that or like do something weird with his hair. It's like, no, dude, you're robbing us of your beauty. Let us see it. But like, do I, am I okay with a dude making a aesthetic statement? That's true. Can a dude, yeah, make an aesthetic statement with a haircut.

Or should a dude ever make an aesthetic statement? Banks, he does it right. Because he hides his identity when he does it. He's been outed. I know. But that's not his, it's not. It's not, He's own fault. Do you think that's really him? I don't know. Are people saying it's not him? What if he's so genius? I've seen a report saying it's not actually him.

Oh, wow. I don't know enough about it, but my brain immediately goes to, that's him trying to spin it, that it's not him because it is him. That's him? Really? Wow. That's cool. That's probably more what I picture.

Yeah. I'd prefer the other guy. You prefer Michael Clayton? Yeah, the other guy looks like he has health insurance. You like LCD sound system over Red Hot Chili Peppers. Yeah. Do you guys watch the Red Hot Chili Peppers doc on Netflix? I started it.

Yeah. Is it good? It's good, yeah. You know what I'm watching it, though? I'm like, these guys, hanging out with them in the 80s, they must have been so annoying. Oh, yeah. Oh, really? Like, Kitas.

I'm not going to say anything about Halel because, you know, RIP. But Ketus and Flea, they were like, yeah, man, we were just off the wall, just energy. I'm like, dude. that sounds so annoying. Yes. Would they, like trash hotel rooms and stuff? They don't talk about that, but I'm sure they did. Yeah.

This is when they were in high school, right? Because they met at Fairfax High when they were kids. Awesome. They went to Fairfax High. That's crazy. I think in the Keatsis book, he says they would, like, go to apartment buildings and jump off the top into the water, and then he missed the pool one time and broke his back. Oh, my gosh.

Like what Chad's talking about, that they were just like insane, pure ADD. How do they meet, Chie? Chad Smith. They don't get into it at all. He feel like he's a very closed off guy. He auditioned for the band and he looked like a hair metal guy. So they were like, he's not going to be in the band. And so they tried to like outjam him. And then he could play better and faster than them. They're like, who the fuck is this guy? That's cool. But then they told him they're like, hey man, you can't. I think he was like wearing a hat and had like long hair. And they're like, you have to like not wear the hat or something like that. And he was like,

fucking I'm not in the band. Really? And they were like, what? And then it turned out he was like going bald and he was embarrassed. But I think he came, musically, I think he was the most outside their wheelhouse, but he's such a good drummer. We do have a debate in chat. What do you guys think about the rat tail?

Are you anti-rat tail? I think it was cool for a hot minute. I think when everyone started doing it. No. Yeah, I think it's like, I think you have a rat tail all, It's like you have a kid you don't see very often. Yeah. Did you have one?

And I had a Jedi braid. I had a Padawan learner's braid in college for attention. Really? For attention. That's why I did it. It was actually when I joined a soccer team. I was on a soccer team and I did that. I think soccer makes, I think is the ball hitting your head so much makes you get bad

haircuts. Yeah, yeah. Do you think you did it for attention? Oh, yeah, a thousand percent. Did it work? No. Wasn't doing it because the force was wrong with me. I'll tell you that much.

I don't think it gave me any attention. No, you didn't get any rusty trombones? No rusty trombones. It didn't feel weird for you to have it. I will say, I don't want to pat my own back, but I went on a pretty good hot streak with the ladies when I had that learned bread. That's what it was going to see.

Your confidence was really high. Yeah. Why did you just lie? Yeah, it's a good question. You know, I think... That's a great question. I don't know why. I think, wonder why?

Because I don't want today's youth to do that. Because it is annoying. Because you don't want them to get as much ass as you? Yeah, I want there to be more ass for me out there. Because you were swaggered out when you had it. That's my move. And I feel like if I would have called you out in the moment and like, like I can picture you

dominating me if I was like, dude, you're doing that for attention. and you just go, nah, bro, I'm good. And you'd like walk away. Maybe the force is with me because I could have just literally been like, nah. You would have force. I'm good, bro. You would have force fielded me and put up a shield to protect yourself.

And you would have been like, nah, dude, that's in your head. You need to focus on you. And you would have walked away. Dude, you want to go get me a beer right now, don't you? And then you would have got me one. So maybe you weren't even thinking about it, dude. I think that haircut. Maybe you were all on instinct.

When I did go to the barber to get that haircut, I blocked out. I just, I wanted it. And I came out with that. And you had friends ready. poetry. Yes, my friends would send me poems. Your Jedi thing was probably the most acceptable, least egregious, most least ego-based thing that was happening in the house.

Could have been. Could have been. I mean, if you got to do something if your roommates are doing poetry. But I feel like if you got a Jedi braid, you've got to have to be able to back it up with some sort of like sick skill. Like you got to be good at skating or I need it to have been in a band or. like something, dude. You were doing improv and you're good at volleyball.

Yeah. It's got to be more subculture. All right, let's keep moving. Or soccer. Or how to, I would have had to have been good at soccer. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, dude.

Hey, my fiance is watching and she said, uh, she said you guys are on fire today. Oh, that's sweet. Uh, uh, oh, sorry. Cut that. I totally forgot. saying cut that but bleep blieper name. Hey. What up?

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Let's get back to the show All right Up next One of you guys sent me sci-fi Strider sent me sci-fi I'm taking this for a little spin J.D. Vance came out and said

He hasn't been to area 51 But he believes there are Extraterestrials and he believes They are demons And this has become a more common idea that all these celestial and all these uh uap encounters are actually celestial beings and i think steiner the guy who started the uh the steiner school system he talked about this a lot that this sort of thing has been happening forever but here's my hot take i don't think jd vance

actually believes that i think jd vance is on the outs with Tucker and with a lot of his coalition because of the Iran war. And so to get back in their good graces, he's saying it because Tucker said it before. And he's copying him so he can kind of signal, hey, I'm still down with y'all. And this is his back doorway in. Yeah, I like that. Also, I listen to coast to coast with George Norrie. it's a great show it's been on forever

I need to start listening to that it's really fun and this is not news if you're into that like this has been around for ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever so no it's just it's just now that we've got a dumb ass vice president who says it in an interview

but it is the most mainstream it's ever been that's what I'm saying it's the most mainstream yeah yeah I like that tick because I feel like with him too with him he can't publicly you know, being the vice president with Trump, he can't publicly say, he has to say he's against the Iran war in code.

Yes, exactly. Because you can't just be like, as the vice president, be like, I'm not down with this, because that's just, you need a united front. Exactly. So he's got to do it with,

no, they're demons. And that's code for, what the fuck are we doing in Iran? Exactly. That's the, that's it. Yeah. Exactly. That's code for,

I have no idea what we're doing. And he'll continue to do that. Yeah. He'll find different ways to signal to the base. I don't like this foreign intervention stuff. Yeah. It's starting with the celestial beings,

but it'll go across the board. Yeah. And he's going to start saying stuff like, we used to build big, beautiful buildings. Now we build just cement blocks. What is that? Wait, you don't even know. what goes into building a building.

You don't know that? That's wild to me. I find it preposterous that you wouldn't know how to build a building. Isn't that part of your job as a leader is to know what people are going to live inside of? I'm sorry, I'm not trying to be glib. I mean this. Well, seriously. Yes.

Yes. I mean, I support, you know, I'm in favor of these specific zoning laws. and I do think that it would greatly benefit housing, but I don't know how to, you know, how to build a building. But you're speaking out of both sides of your mouth. With all due respect, I mean, if you care about buildings, you should know how they're built. I mean, especially if you're going to be in charge of something like that.

Do you know how to build a building? Yeah, of course. You start with molten steel and then you put it through a pacifying machine. Okay, you know, now we're getting into semantics here. Oh, I don't know. It's not semantics. I can't do the laugh now. And you've been on Bill Maher the whole time.

We're going to be right back. Yeah, Bill, Bill. You know, we have whatever his name is, Robert DeJoyce, was Master General here, along with Tucker, happy to have you. This is Bill Maher on a date. This is Bill Maher. Look, I appreciate what you're saying. But can we just go and have sex?

Yeah, it's like, Bill Maher, he's like, oh, come on. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, come on. Will you get over that? That is what everyone says. It's the same thing every time. Oh, yeah, we want to have sex. Well, then why aren't they fucking?

I mean, seriously. Just, this would make me so sick of liberals. They talk about wanting to have sex and then nobody fucks. And I'm not saying they do it right on the right either because they're all fucking and no one's talking about it. Oscar's so white. Guess again? I can do it again. I got a little something on the alien part.

Let's go, Jake. This could be mostly my algorithm, but I feel like it's getting pushed to me a shit ton right now with all those missing scientists. I don't know if you guys have heard anything about that. Yeah. So I like watched one video on that and then all of a sudden that's like all I'm seeing now is that there's so many like, you know, past that are leading us to aliens coming to Earth right now.

I'm like, is this something that they're pushing out to try and hide stuff that's going on in the war? Or am I just lost in the algorithm? So there's a, those are the other big talking points is that one is this is all just distraction from Iran and Epstein. So they just like slowly drip out disclosure to keep us distracted and feeding on false information. And then some people think it's to cover up military tech that they don't want to expose yet. Did you say that already? No, I didn't say that, but that's kind of what I'm thinking. And it's even like crazy.

Like, I'm getting videos of like pilots calling down to ATC and being like, hey, I just saw three lights, man. Like, is there anybody near me? Oh, no, it's a UFO. And then the ATC is like, we'll take a video of it. But the way that those UAPs are tick-tacking, zigzagging across the air, the physics don't make sense. And no biology could live through that. It's got to be something different. It's got to be a celestial being touching us from the other side.

And the government doesn't want to know because they don't think our brains could comprehend the reality of demons. Not only do they not want us to know, they don't really know what's going on. They're scared. And for the Gov to come out and be like, look, we don't know either. Then everyone's like, well, fuck. That's why Steiner talked about. There's the Luciferian kind of philosophy where it's like this stuff will elevate us out of our body. and take us out of the material world.

And then there's the materialist who want to keep it empirical. But Jesus is the balancing tension. They need to let go and let Jesus. Can I get more conspiratorial here with the missing scientists, Jake? Here's a take. This is just a theory.

And I'm going to kind of fly off. I'm going to go a little crazy here. we're attacking Iran we attacked Venezuela it's clear you know I think it's kind of these are direct you know indirect attacks on China right we're trying to weaken China indirectly and so China there's an underground a secret race to figure out what this alien technology is to understand what it is so that we can use it for ourselves. And this is between all the superpowers, Russia, China, US. And so China's like trying to send their program into hyperdrive, being like, well,

we're just going to steal some of your scientists and torture them so we can figure out what they know so that they can, you know, figure out what the alien technology is and become the elite superpower. Whoa. What do you guys think? So it's the alien race. yeah it's like it's like you know we're not going directly to war with these superpowers so we're using all angles you know trump's going after the energy and then they're like well fuck it we're going to

go after the aliens what do you think i like it i think that uh scientists probably have logical reasons why it's like not aliens and so they're like nah dude shut up dumb ass let's put you in let's put you in area 51 so you can't say anything against us because they like like to perpetuate this narrative. You don't believe in aliens? I think there's aliens, but I don't know. The fact that they bend to Earth, I mean, bro, there's a lot of science it would take to bend space and time.

And it's a lot of us just going, well, they've figured it out. That alien species figured it out how to get here. And while that might be the case, also, it's pretty egotistical of them being like, come to our planet, let's check us out. Do you know how big space is, bro? No. Fucking ever-expanding and big. I mean, they might not give a fuck about us, or maybe they flew by.

Also, there's a lot of stuff you could explain it away. Like, do I think there's aliens? Dude, I think there's aliens at the bottom of the freaking wall. I think those fish at the bottom of Mariana's trench are basically aliens to me. With dongs on their head? Yeah. So, yeah, I think there's alternate life forms. Do I think they're flying around?

Also, why is the video evidence always the worst grainiest footage I've ever seen in my life? dude. Like, how come it can't just be a good camera, bro? I got a theory on that. Let's give me a fucking, have an iPhone. I got a theory on that. I got a theory on that. Yeah. The aliens use technology to scramble your technology so you can't get video of them.

That's a good ass theory. That's a good ass theory. Well, yeah, because the U.S. Gov's got a weapon right now, the discombobulator, who knows if it's even real, but they won't talk about in interviews. And it's become a point of obsession. What if this is just practice footage of them discombobulating a regular air cap flying by? And then they say, oh, look, it moves all weird because it's being discombobulated on camera.

So you think it's more likely that all these UAPs are just like new technology that the government doesn't want people to know about? Probably. You know, I will say when I watch the alien documentaries, because I used to not think aliens were real. But when I watched the alien documentaries, or there was the congressional testimony in 2023, right? Yeah. the AITP or whatever it was, I did find most of the testimony credible. Like the people don't seem crazy.

And a lot of them have solid backgrounds where they're not like, they're not weirdos. Like they're like, no, I'm a normal guy. I'm a plumber. So my wife and two kids, I'm a Christian. And I was out on a Friday and we saw an alien. I'm like, you know what?

You don't seem like you're jumping for anything. Yeah, I got, sorry, I'm talking a lot today. But I got one more thing. This is also another sort of algorithm insertion. I think the CIA is taking over podcasts. I don't know if you guys have watched this recently. There's been two spies who have been on a shitload of podcast in the past year. Oh, yeah, that one guy's hilarious, dude.

Yeah, John. He's like the guy with gray hair. He's funny. Yeah. And his stories are like, they tried to make me gay. And like stuff like that as a CIA guy to like infiltrate people. And he went to jail, right? Because he whistleblue on like Abu Ghreeb or something like that.

That's the story. Yeah. Supposedly he's like anti-CIA now and he's like spilling secrets. And then they had another spy on who is still CIA and they like argued about it. The curly-haired guy? Yeah, exactly. But the thing is, is like these all get like 10 million views and everyone believes like everything they're saying about the CIA.

And like I feel like as the CIA, that would be something you want to do. You want to put out good press. You want to have somebody kind of out there, you know, talking to people. Yeah. So I don't know. CIA is infiltrating podcast. I do think that's a, I do think, like, I do think there's something to like the government or like intelligence communities understanding the power of podcast, like just because it helped, you know, with the elections and stuff, major influence. So I do think they're probably trying to, you know, get some messaging.

I think there's, there's something to that. They're trying to get some messaging in through this media. People think the government has been feeding information. to Hollywood for decades. Specifically with aliens too. Like that they'll give them real information, fake information just to kind of control the narrative. Yeah.

And then the question is the Spielberg in on it. Dude. He's coming out with an alien movie. That movie looks sick, dude. It looks freaky. It's called disclosure. Is it called disclosure? Dude.

I do love alien movies. Maybe not only disclosure. It might be like Disclosure Day, maybe. I think that's right. Yeah. It looks sick, dude. Here's the thing that bums me out about all this stuff though. It's like aliens used to be, we've talked about this before.

Aliens used to be, it used to be kind of underground. Like, you know, it was like not many people were talking about it, but it was super interesting. Like, Rogan kind of broke the seal on it. But every time he had an alien podcast, you were like, it just, the world of possibilities opened up. Now everyone's talking about it. It's definitely too late to come out with your own alien podcast because it's like, dude, you're like five years late to the party. Yeah, it's over-saturated. And now it's just like, it just feels like everyone's, it doesn't have the same pizzazz.

No. You can't even go to Roswell, eat some alien jerky, have some fun, get a t-shirt that glows in the dark. Yeah, it used to be fun. Used to be fun. It used to be fun. You know what you can do now? And I will say, I'm sneaking in another hot take on you just because it is about aliens. I feel like we should move on after this.

But someone sent me aliens. I forget who it was. And I think aliens are our friend And we should be grateful for aliens And that so many people believe it Because now it's a great excuse to miss work Because you can say, oh dude On Friday I got abducted bro

I got probed It took me up in the ship and then dropped me And then if your boss says they believe in aliens They can't punish you for that Yeah You got proud They have to believe you And yeah I did

I mean, I was just on a hike with my dog And they took me up And they put like maple syrup substance in my butt And explored my orifices And that's why I couldn't come in That's why I missed my ship on Friday So my bad about that But I'm cool now

I'm good Did they watch any of the pod? Yeah, they watched a lot of pot Do they had all sorts of screens And all sorts of media So you can just make literally You can challenge me as far as you wanted this narrative What did the ship look like?

It was tough to describe. It's like a shape you've never seen. The probe? Yeah, I was in a haze. I think you're, dude, I think you're being too skeptical of the aliens. Really? I think so. Really?

Yeah, really. You know, there's no scientific evidence. How do you know? How do you, did you watch any of the docs about like the people telling their personal testimony? What do you mean when you say scientific evidence? There's no hard evidence. There's no, there's nothing that's ever been released. of like here's an alien here's that you mean we don't have any like physical like

biological or the craft yeah and also the science that we understand is very difficult to justify aliens being here but what about and i can't even and i've read my boy um what's his face carl sagan a little bit and uh i've read a little bit which is makes me credible but uh what about naval intelligence officer david grush saying we do have biologics that's one dude there was a lot of of guys who tested. I would lean into more that that guy, David Grush, wants attention and is trying to sell a book down the line than he saw. And maybe, and you know what, he might believe he saw that. I might believe David Grush believes what he's saying. But I'm saying there's no intersection or cross-referencing of all this information, even if you want to call it data to justify like, yeah, that there's an alien,

dude. That's posted up like this. Okay, but we do have a lot of military. witnesses that said they saw objects and physical phenomenon that they couldn't explain. Okay. I can't explain. I can't fucking explain my long-term ETF bank account. And it's very well understood. I mean, that's an average Joe, being like I saw something I can't explain. I think these guys are not average Joe's. Oh, you said military dudes?

Yeah. And they have planes and so they have, yeah, but they're average Joe's compared to like understanding interstellar travel and like light speed and light year craft getting to our earth and landing and then taking off they fly jets though what i'm saying they're average jokes with a scientific understanding of how the cosmo works i think like new but but sagin those are the guys that would be able to understand it best like there's a some sort of drake equation that i don't know what that means i think it's good so you're saying you're saying because they're not physicist or cosmonologist, but...

And they could be confused by what they saw. I mean, you could be an amazing naval... They're saying, I don't know what I saw. And I think probably that's aliens. That's unidentified flying object, UFO. So you're just putting faith in the experts that we have established, but what if the physics was beyond their comprehension? That's what I'm saying, yeah, that's...

We don't know. We can't... That's so hard to say. I agree. We don't know. Yeah. But so then you saying it's too hard to be skeptical if we don't know. I'm confused now.

You go, dude, you're too skeptical for aliens. But even our greatest, you just said, our greatest physicists might not know how their technology works. Or we can't justify scientifically how they got here or how aliens are here. We just have to have grand faith. But you do think they're aliens. Oh, for sure. And the universe? Yeah.

Absolutely. But you think the things that these people are saying they saw aren't aliens? Maybe not. I'm saying more so likely, probably not than are. All right. That they've been to Earth and they're chilling and posting up and flying around in saucers. But you guys are saying like, what percentage do you think that like, that they have come here and made contact? Yeah. Like how hard do you believe that?

I don't, I mean, Obama said there was like alien contact. Really? Yeah, he did this like a month ago. But then he walked it back and he was like, no, I'm just saying they're, they're, they're, Look, look, that's not what I said. What I said was is that if the universe is so vast, then there has to be aliens. Are aliens real? They're real, but I haven't seen them.

And they're not being kept in, what is it? Area 51. Oh, like he doesn't know what Area 51 is. Come on, Barack. Unless there's this enormous conspiracy and they hit it from the president of the United States. What was the first question you wanted answered when you became president? where are the aliens he seems like he's lying to me

I think so I think he's just dude I think he's just having fun I think he knows that guy doing this interview is so dumb asking me these questions and it's all a joke for him let me let me say something Barack everyone everyone knows

what area 51 is everyone knows the name area 51 for him to be on the podcast to be like he'd be like I've never I've never seen them and I don't know if they're being held and what's that place? What's that place? Oh yeah, Area 51. He knows.

I think he's playing poker. I think he's testing like, you know, when you sit down at a poker table and you ask someone a meaningless question, but you gauge their reaction to it to see who you're playing with. I think that's what he's doing? He's going, what's that place called? And then this guy jumping in Area 51, he goes, okay, I got an excitable one here. Now I know how to toy with him. Here's the thing.

Obama is an alien. Him saying Yeah, in a manner of speaking If he's not from Hawaii Him saying What's it called? That's like that's like I'm joking

That's like me saying Man I got one of those things It's where your penis gets hard What do you call it? A boner A boner Yeah a boner That's the same

You know I'm lying You know I know I know what a boner is I will say I talk to a friend Who knows a guy Who's big in the alien space and my friend works in news and he said, I don't think he really believes in aliens.

He just knew it was like a good business. Could be that. Also, is the grand fallout? And I'm asking, I don't know. So say the government comes out in a couple months, oh my gosh, we have little gray alien dudes. They're stored. Here they are.

Look at them. One, people are going to believe what they want. I feel like they're going to either believe that those are real or not. And then two, what's the big fallout? Is it like a religion thing? is it like a meaning of life thing? Like what is the... No, I think we're ready for it.

I think people... I think the drip has been slow enough that people would be able to tolerate almost anything at this point. I kind of think that too. I don't think that like... I think even like the Catholic Church or whatever would still be able to justify it.

I think it would actually be helpful for religions at this point. Really? Yeah. Because I think they kind of need an updating. And I think that would be what the... would kind of make them incorporate all that stuff. And they would find enough in their literature

that could match what was happening. I've heard just from some docs that the truth is too scary for us. Also, I hate that, like, there's, like, somebody who's deciding this for us. I'm like, stop, let us know. Here's something I heard from both Tom DeLong and a Rogan podcast. Some of the aliens, so there's three, four types of aliens. There's, like, the gray men, tall gray men. You want one is?

big insects whoa like the men and black style cockroach at the end yeah dude I don't want to know that I think the problem with AI too is like everyone questions

if anything's real anymore right oh yeah that's happening more on social media sucks yeah people will say that like yeah it's you'll go to Twitter you'll see a video

the first 10 comments below it grok is this real grok is this real yeah so like maybe some of this footage is just AI generated that was before the public got access to it and they're like using it. I don't know. It's a or maybe there is real footage but we don't know because we think it's AI. It's weird. I know. The questions don't cease. We live in a strange time for information. Yeah. What's up guys? We got a new sponsor of the podcast that I'm so pumped to talk about

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Yes. They got creatine chews. They got berberine. They got omega-3. Ooh, yeah, I got some Omega 3 too. I'm going to start taking that. I'm going to get my dome in check. Yeah, you need that anti-inflammatory. Yeah. Keep your knees greased. Keep your elbows jointed. Momentus is awesome. Guys, make sure you hop on the Momentus train. Right now, Momentus is offering our listeners up to 35% off your first order with promo code go deep. Head to live momentus.com and use promo code go deep for up to 35% off your first order. That's live, L-I-V-E-M-O-M-E-N-T-O-U-S.com. Promocode go deep. Chad, you're up. All right.

JT sent me boogie boards. Here's my hot take. Boogie boarders need their own beaches. Whoa. I'm talking board segregation. I'm saying there needs to be established surfing beaches. There needs to be established boogie beaches. Okay?

We can't, enough of this mix and match. It's too much of a kerfuffle. We need established by the government. The government needs to decide, okay, the Huntington Beach Pier, Southside, surfers, north side, boogie boarders. The wedge, boogie borders, 54th Street, surfers, river jetties, surfers. That needs to happen.

We need the government to intervene. You know, we have. things like housing and debt and health care but I do think there needs to be a bored czar who needs to come in and say okay I've established the beaches this is a boogie beach this is a surf beach this is a nude beach and I do think we need to establish more nude beaches for sure who do you think would be the best boards are I think you would do a good job you have a great understanding of breaks and vibes

preach but are you too young does it need to be Leonard Hamilton is what I'm asking or is he kind of too doing his own thing Kelly Slater what about Sterling

yeah I think Sterling Sterling Spencer or Bert Kreischer he's such a sick dude Bert Chrysher yes sorry no I'm not I'm yeah Sterling's awesome

I didn't have any follow I just like Sterling and I think he's got a good approach to life. Do you feel it all conflicted that you're in support of board apartheid? No. No. I think it's, I think some needs, I think some things need progression, some things need regression. Some things need regression. And I think we've been way too inclusive with boards.

Because it's dangerous. What about skimmers? Scammers? They're done. Skimming's outlawed. Just not even allowed. It's illegal. Go find a lake.

Mara pond. Dweaves. What about towing? Yeah, you can tow in. But the thing is, tow in is already only, you can only do it at so many beaches already. Yeah.

So do you outlaw regularly. surfing in regular boogie boarding at those beaches for tolling and is that a waste of waves? Because you don't want to waste waves. No. You want this to be. Toen for Outer Reef.

I didn't realize some communities get picked on for Telling when it's unnecessary. Dude, yeah. Like, I think it was like somewhere in Australia they were like, oh, when it's like double overhead and it was a guy getting his jet ski out of his car. Yeah. I didn't even know what the joke was for his second.

Dude, like, dude came paddle. Yeah, and like I was talking to a dude in Manhattan Beach and he's like, yeah, dude, freaking put up a clip of me. We had the boat out. It was like quadruple overhead out by the plant. And the clip went wild and people were like,

he doesn't even need a toe and he's getting trashed for it. It's tough out there. For eager to towers, dude. It's tough out there. Can't be too eager to toe. All right, strata, you're up.

All right, dudes. Oh, yeah. We got to call Paul in a second. This is huge. Chodes. We all know what a chode is. No, we don't. We don't all know what a chode is.

Because a chode has too many definitions. Is it a short, thick, rugged cock? Something that Gimley from Lord of the Rings would have, I imagine. It'd be funny if Likolos had one. I think you made it better by adding rugged. Thank you. Or is it your taint or gruntle? I don't know.

I grew up knowing a chow was a short fat cock, an airplane coat can, if you will. A dick wider than it is long. Yes. There's dudes out there, and I don't know if you guys know this, but there's dudes out there who think a chode is your taint. And so how as a society are we supposed to call out our bros, lame cousin for bringing cocaine to play settlers of Catan. It's actually kind of sick when I think of back on it.

Just having a different vibe. How am I supposed to properly identify a dude's vibe that's off by calling him a chode? When I don't even know if I'm referring to a guy as basically, you know, the stinkiest place on earth. That's hard. Or a short fat cock. Yeah. Fuck, man. Yeah, the limits of language and people's interpretation.

of that language. I think the clearest answer and it might not be what you want to hear is you just have to tell that guy he's a short fat cock. Be direct. Speak directly.

And in some ways I think that might be a more effective slam than calling him a chode. I think you're absolutely right. I think that's the move. Like, let's say you're in talks with North Korea.

Oh. And you go, Kim, you're a short fact. Yeah, he is kind of a walking show. You are a short fat cock. Message received. No matter what language you're speaking.

Take that to Pyong Gang. And is it confusing? But is it equally effective? Fuck, dude. Is it equally effective if I'm talking to Putin? And I'm telling Putin, hey, look, you've sent so many drones to the Crimean Peninsula. You're obsessed with drones. only virgins and

stinky nether region areas between the butthole and ball sack you're acting like a huge you're acting like a huge little spot between my butthole and ball sack oh what you're saying are you saying are you calling me a taint or a jude a taint so i think there's already a word for it hey dude you're acting like a taint hmm hmm hmm you call me taint I think you're right. I think it's you got to just...

And then a chode is... Yeah, I think you guys nailed it. What if you're talking to Giorgio Maloney? First female prime minister of Italy. You just stared on the barrel and you go, listen, you short, fat, cock. We're putting a 50% tariff on your noodles. I think that's effective.

I think that's effective. She never had a man talk to her like that. No. Yeah. No. Yeah. All right, dudes. That's how you take it to her.

For my hot take next, I got this one. I got team captain from Strider. I think I've been a bad team captain. Whoa. I think I've hurt our dude crew by being so argumentative about, our draft location. Wow. And I took a,

but here's the thing about me. I don't think all conflict is abuse. In fact, sometimes I think the opposite. I think it's all processed to get closer to someone. And me and this next guy, we're due for resolution.

So we're going to call him on the pod right now. No way. Jake, I just sent you his number. Oh. Paul, what's up, dude? What up? dude, how you doing? Dude, doing well.

We're on the pot right here. Strader's taking a piss, but Chad's to my left. Hey, Paul. Oh, amazing. What up, Chad? How you living? Dude, doing well, man. Miss you guys.

You too, brother. Miss you too, man. I always appreciate the love. So you're in Seattle. How is Seattle doing? We're hitting an all-timer right now, man. I mean, no matter which way you want to look at it, we look good.

Sports-wise? This is the best time of my life right now. You guys won the Super Bowl, and you won the fantasy championship and the same year, the double whammy. Yep, yep. I got my phonics back. Well, like, you know,

maybe three more years, but that's another thing. Dude, freaking sounders are killing it. Mariners last year, playoff, dude. Cracking? Dude, World Cup this summer? It's just the summer of Paul,

man, it keeps going for the year of Paul. you've been crushing it dude and uh you know you and me we hit a speed bump you weren't even a hater on the Vegas draft you were down and when you you were the MVP

of the trip you brought it no matter what what venue we went to whether we were chilling at home or whether we were at a nightclub or treasures or uh at the casino you were a man for all seasons and then you graciously offered your parents'

home on an island off of Seattle for the fantasy draft. But I'd gotten so much shit for Vegas. And even after we went to Zed by the pool, guys were still saying it was a shitty trip. My brain couldn't take it because I thought that was an all-time day. And then so I started giving you a hard time about Seattle. And look, I am partial to a party destination city. Some guys like to do the cabin trip for the fantasy football draft. They like to be in the woods.

I'm more of a let's get out of the house Let's get drunk And then the guys are like yeah but then night two You just went and saw a movie You didn't even party the whole time I get it but I like I like the city options And so I gave you a hard time on it Paul And then you did the jiu jitsu on me

Which I never expected And you pulled the offer Yeah Just take it away Make everybody mad at JT So was that the plan Yeah, yeah. Well, listen, I just wanted, you know, a couple statements there, let me clarify. I was not down for Vegas, but you made a push. You had a plan, you had an idea, and I said, all right, I'll go along with it, right? I'm a pretty pale, you know, prefer cold pamps kind of guy. And regarding, like, action himself, I disagree with the way you phrase that, you know, the rest of the dudes the league want to hang out with each other. You don't want to hang out with us, dude. And that's okay. That's okay.

That's actually not okay, but it's okay. Well, when you say I don't want to hang out, I think that's untrue. I do want to hang out. I just want to hang out while we're doing something. I don't think anyone brings it harder at the beer dye, at the paintball, at the club than I do. I mean, I am balls to the fucking wall, man.

But, you know, when we've got 15 guys, on the couch, I don't mind it, but it should be at the end of the night. It shouldn't be the bulk of the trip. Hey, well, you also wanted us to get hotels so that no one would have been hanging out the entire time. No, he was Airbnb for Vegas from the beginning.

Airbnb was not the move. Yeah. There's amazing sweets. You know, I think it's not that JT doesn't want to hang out with this. He doesn't like the, he calls it chupy-whoopy. I think we need to explain what a chupy-whoopie. Yeah, sometimes the guys will pitch a town that's just like in the middle of nowhere. You've never heard of it.

There's not a ton to do. And they're like, dude, it'll be the best. Like, we'll pee outside. I'm like, you can pee outside at a city or like a hot vacation spot that's got a million things to do. Like Vegas, Miami. Hey, man. This sounds like a great idea. It would be so fun.

somebody would like dedicate themselves to then hosting and planning out all these activities like I was doing. Uh, that would have been incredible. But, um, what were, we're going to start fighting again? Cause what were the activities you had planned? Getting tariocchi.

We were going to go to a baseball game. We were, you know, trying to check out Sounders, dude. We might even go to a concert. There's a bar that's 10 minutes away. Yeah, the city was an hour and a half away, but you'd be on a ferry for an hour. of that that's kind of cool we had a lot of activity so PNW is nice he's the thing I kind of land in a little bit of a middle ground but I might say this while you guys are two leaders I would say as leaders listen to their constituents you

know you guys a lot of bros and I got to tell you took off on Saturday and I don't think that's either of your guys's fault I think there's dudes with priorities that have shifted. And these guys that come in on Thursday and they're too tired on Friday, which is the main day for showing up, that upset me more. Because I'll say JT,

while he did botch getting an Airbnb, bad call, through the sickest, sickest Saturday in Vegas. He got 34 years, like 40-year-old dudes behind ZED's DJ booth and we all have indigestion. And it was the sickest, quickest pool party and then we had a chill-ass Saturday and dudes their tanks couldn't handle it. So I think you guys are taking too much blame on this.

Well, hey, you know, my Zed experience was chasing after two guys that got kicked out. So, you know, you need to factor that in for me. That does suck. It was a great day. It looks like. Paul, here's the thing. We might never see eye to eye on this. Because even when you just said an hour and a half to get to Seattle,

when we were arguing on thread, you said it was an hour. And so you just... I said the ferry was an hour. I knew what I was doing. You just threw the time off big. You know we're not mobilizing 15 guys to a baseball game and a concert. Dude, whoa, JT doesn't want the action anymore? Okay.

No, I want the action. When I landed in Vegas, I get there. Guys are chilling. I go, I go, guys, let's go to the gun range. It's hard to get the boys moving. Yeah. I'm anti-gun. Dude, are you anti-50-cowel, though?

You can shoot a 50-cow sniper rifle. You can shoot the sniper rifle from Haley. Is that where you were coming from on that? Maybe. Interesting. I forget. I forget. This is my thing.

I joined this league about three years ago. You know, first year, a huge playoff run. Just shock a lot of people. Second year, just plummet. Third year. Put it all. together, put it all together. I was just looking at my draft, dude.

I had the number one rated draft, and I also won the league. That's the huge trade. Paul's on fire. The point of this is that like, it's prison rules, dude. I saw the biggest guy in the league, J.T. Park. I got to go right at him. And I've been going at you for three years now. And, uh, you know, no going at me.

I went at you. Paul, let's go. I minted you. I gave you the honor of my blade. I put you on. This is the, this is the, this is the achievement you want. Oh, I like, I like, because you're the nicest guy in the league. So attacking you is the most fun because it looks horrible for me. And it creates, it creates the most tension.

And I made you, and it brought your animal out, which is really what I wanted. Yeah. Yeah. You said the JSN trade was terrible, that JSN was going to have a terrible season, dude. That was awesome, bro. That was good. That was crazy. I said that.

I think so. He probably just said that because he hates Seattle. Yeah. You know, I did say that. Well, I ate shit on that. So, Paul, will you put it on record now? Is the house back on the table for the draft now that we've made amends publicly? 2027, yeah, sure.

You know what? If you would have said yes, I was going to put up another fight and just keep battling you on it anyways. No, no, we're a year away from being a year away, man. And, oh, my God, it's going to be so much fun. And I think that my original comment still stands that if you don't want, want to do it, you don't need to come. You can just, you know, I'm the video AV guy. I always set up the Zoom for the draft or everyone can't make it.

Dude, you could just be the Zoom guy. You know, this is, Paul, you're really rising to the occasion. Because normally when we're on thread, you're a huge pussy. But right now you're really bringing the thunder, dude. And I write out notes. I'm both. They're working. Let me tell you this, brother.

There ain't going to be, you can do a draft without me. it's not going to feel like a draft, but by all means, do what you guys want, all video in from Vegas, and we'll see who's having the better time, brother. We'll put dollars to donuts on that, and you guys,

oh, we watched Avatar for the ninth time. Actually, I need JT. Luke tickled my butt during this scene. The one time you weren't at the draft, I got in time. I was there that way here. You were there that year? I was already asleep.

Oh, yeah, that was the double throw up here. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, fuck. I don't like avatar is so much fun to watch with your brother Chris dude I don't know why you would choose that as an example That's crazy Maybe maybe maybe because I've done it before brother Maybe it's time for new experiences new memories. We don't just go to rehash mode

That's why I started attacking you because it's something new. It's something that hasn't happened yet I'm the one who hasn't happened yet I think that's That's what's causing all this, that I have entered your domain and I'm kind of, you know, doing the whole thing. Like I'm on your podcast right now, dude. That's got a great. Oh, dude. You little virgin, dude.

You little virgin. First of all, I gave you the invite because you always talk about the pod. You're like, this was a great episode. It's very sweet. I wouldn't even pick on you for that. By the way, when I told you you were on, I've never seen someone respond faster to a text message. I could feel your smile through the text, all right? I know you called Mama and Daddy Connor afterwards.

Well, guys, I made it. You know what, Paul. I knew you do good today. I knew you do good day. We got to move. We got to move on. You did very, you did good. You did good.

All right. Well, hey, appreciate you guys having me on. Huge fan, dude. Shout out to the stoke Lord. Shout out to the guys behind, dude. Making all this happen. Like, you know, I don't think you guys shout out those guys. enough so imagine that you

love you guys he's the best and I love my brother by the way I love watching Avatar with my brother I did not appreciate you trying to drive a wedge

there either I won't bring up your sister Luke all right I got enough respect for you guys plans with and plans and he ends with a Dune quote

the guy's the best oh yeah I read oh yeah we'll talk we'll talk shit about Dune Messiah I read Dune Messiah just so I could make fun of Paul

because he loves Dune so much yeah him Brooks and my brother's brother and Robbie, a bunch of virgins and I really love Dune. It was a decent book, very feminine book, but it was good. It was good. Oh, dude.

I gotta get back to work. All right, God bless, Paul, you're the man, dude. You're the man. I love you, God, love you. You're our champ. God, what an auspicious debut from the kid. He's a killer. You know, Paul, we don't realize he's been crafted by like three or four older brothers.

So he's got a lot of, he's got a lot of technique he's got a lot of moves that you don't quite see and he is ultimately like an unbelievably nice guy but he's got you know he's been crafted in the flame yeah yeah the flame of

playing computer games and reading Dune what a badass so he he lives in Seattle yes grew up together though no C okay and then Do both the brothers live in Seattle? No, Luke lives in Denver.

Oh, that's right. Okay. But here's another brother who lives in Seattle. He's a doctor. Yeah, his older brother, Mark. Mark lives in Seattle. And then they got another brother, Michael. Yeah.

There's four of them. Where's Michael live? Where does he that? I think you might be like East Coast or something. I think so. I'm not sure, though. They're all very impressive guys. They're all super smart, super funny.

Yeah. Yeah, they're so funny. Oh, you know who loves them is the Barrett brothers. The guys who started Friday beers know. them really well. Oh, really? Yeah. Oh, that's awesome. And if you hang out with them, they'll be like Luke and Paul are the funniest guys ever. How do they know? I think they all went to college together at Georgetown. Oh. Yes, Georgetown. Yeah, they're all just like super white guys. I would say one thing about his brother when we were in Denver, he got up on the stage and sang in front

of the whole crowd. Oh, he just fucking killed it though. Yeah. He sang the wrong song. He's sang the wrong song, but the crowd was into it, you know? The second night, because he did it two nights in a row. Oh, did he do two nights? The first night, nailed it. And then the second night he got our And he was like, I want to switch songs. And we were like, what the fuck are you doing, man? But he killed it. He listened to the audience spoke back to him with silence. But the first, the first night, what you said gave him the song suggestion, he drilled.

Yeah. Oh man. To be fair, too, he had sung that song a million times. So he was like, bro, I kind of don't want to do that anymore. It was kind of, he's kind of using my argument. Let's mix it up a little bit. Real quick. So what's happening with the draft?

That's what I was going to ask. We don't have a location. Good call. Yes. Well, I want to ask. We don't have a look. I thought. you know, bringing him on the pod

would be enough kind of payola to get him to bring his spot back. I was still going to be a fucker about it and try to beat him. Because there's no one to fight now. Right. We've lost our fight. So the main spot used to be Park City.

Yes. And that's not longer on the table. No. No, it's gone. Well, I mean, we could get an Airbnb there if we wanted to. But the family that graciously let us occupy their home is like, no, which we get.

We don't want 15 guys in our house. We get it. And yeah. And then so we're always deciding on a place I think I'm going to lose this year because I got Vegas last year too so it's just like I'm not going to get my way every year but the guys want to go

somewhere more remote more remote guys like chippy whoopee thing is this year I got no skin in the game I'm having a little girl so I'm going to be remote I'm going to be relying on Paul's video I mean you were remote long before that happened and completely checked out like I'm a Saturday guy

come in Friday, I'll leave Saturday. And so all the, most of the crew, they're not all, like, most people are in different parts of the country. Yeah, we got two bros in Connecticut, they call it New York. We've got, like, five bros in SoCal, two bros in Denver, one bro in Seattle,

one bro in Texas. Yeah, we're pretty spread out. Oh, and one bro in New York. Yeah, actually in New York. Actually in New York. Yeah. Like on his mail, it says New York. Yeah. And then, you know, this is, we can move on after this. But me and Strider had a little, we didn't have a beef. But last year at the draft, I landed like, me and Strider left from the same airport at the same time.

But he went, he went. Spirit, bro. So he got delayed by like an hour and a half. And then when I was like, dude, I'll wait for you at the airport. And then so I wait for an hour and a half. And then when Strider lands, he goes, hey, I'm going to wait another hour and a half for Brooks. Do you want to wait with me? No, for foursome.

For for some. Well, the thing was, no, it wasn't even when I landed. I hadn't even taken off yet. You landed and we were texting from the thing. And I was so delayed. I was like, dude, I might as well wait. But in the funny part, I was like, I'm such a cheap skit. I was like, oh, well, I'll split an Uber.

I just ended up paying for the Uber for our boy that I waited for. So I waited and paid what I ordinarily would have waited. But it turns out if I got there early, you and I just would have gone to the gym together. Actually, we probably would have gone and shot guns or something together. We would have gone to the gym or shot guns. Spirit fucked us. If I would have landed early, I wouldn't have waited two, three hours. I think you landed, and then you said you were going to wait longer.

And I had already been waiting for you. Maybe. Maybe I was, like, going through the terminal and saying that. But the delay really fucked us. Oh, it was tough. It was tough. But yeah, I should not have waited for our boy. I should have been like, let me just hurry even get there.

You know where you should get? You guys should go? It's tough in August, New Orleans. I'm down. That sounds amazing to me. No one's just fun. We could all Shaila Buffett. Yeah.

I would love to go there. All the boys would, you know, they got to check your party? It's way too party for them. Okay. They're like, wait, but does like the hotel have a Netflix so we can watch a K-pop demon hunter? These guys, these guys get back. Nashville will be fun. Nashville.

That'd be perfect. Nashville is great, dude. Smashville, bro. Chaddy, you're a lot of fun. You should come. You'd bring it. I don't know. I think I got one party in me.

a year. I think you got your big one coming up. Yeah, I've, I've, dude, I get like, I get like, it's like kind of like, PTSD about being hung over. Oh, for sure.

I'll like think about it for like weeks before. Yes. I need to get over that. Yeah, it's just going to happen. It is stressful. Like your bachelor party is going to be amazing, but you're going to be hungover after.

It's just come on. We got to deal with it. The, uh, dude, I think the dudes don't party anymore, bro. And look, I was never the hugest partier.

I only do one night, so I'm kind of faking it to you. But like, these guys leave on Saturday because they're like they're like I have to be home on I have to be home on Sunday to pack my daughter's lunch for Monday shut up dude damn it's true shut up love me more than your daughter no when I have my daughter I'm gonna be I'm gonna call my daughter and fucking I'm my Zed's party dude I'll see you later I'm with Zed later yeah all right Chad you're up uh strider sent Coachella it needs to be

subsidized for dudes in their 40s they need it the most that's sick dude they need it the most there needs to be provided housing and subsidized tickets they need the release

and I think it's a great place to have a release and you know these 20 somethings are going they don't even know what they're they're there but you know they're not they're not getting the full of preach

guys in their 40s and ladies they give full of preach because they've lived some life they've paid off credit cards they've gotten a mortgage they've started a family they've gone through statistically

one recession they deserve to go to Coachella and not have it break the bank. And they deserve to be front row on mushrooms, just losing their mind. I think we have it reversed. I think young people, they party too much too young.

I think you need to save the party for when you're older. I think you're right. I think when you hear a young person yell, I don't even give a fuck. Yeah. Yeah, we know. Yeah. I think it's more powerful for a 40-year-old guy to yell.

whoa yeah I give a fuck yeah and be in the front row because he has so much more life yep yeah because on Sunday he can't even stay

Sunday night at Coachella oh he's got to go back to work he's got to be at work on Monday yeah I was in college all my buddies would come back

and they'd be all just like yeah just camped out just you know all respect to them but they didn't they didn't fully know what they were getting

you don't camp with hemorrhoids wipe your ass in a porta potty and then go jump up and down to the Sahara tent sweat on that you're in pain you are in pain but you're loving it and do you feel like you're resisting the natural transition to stage coach whoa yeah yeah i am i don't like that it's i don't like that society is telling me i should listen to the country now do i like morgan wallen yeah Do I like anything else in country? Mostly no.

And you're not going to force me. I will stick with deep house for the rest of my life. You don't force me to listen to country because I'm getting older. Okay? Okay. I had to break up with some weird 25 and I was like, I want to do Coachella. She's like, I want to do stage coach. And I looked at her and I was like, I'm not ready to have kids.

Yeah, I think there's a tent at stagecoach like the Sky Rizzy tent. You know, I think people are handing out Tums. It's pretty nice time. It's a pretty, if I was going to describe a stagecoach, it's an agreeable, an agreeable music festival. And here's the thing. For your system. And here's the thing. I don't really appreciate cosplay being a,

cowboy oh it's disrespectful i think it's disrespectful stagecoach does pop-ups for real estate companies yeah i think you can interview for black rock if you're at if you're at stage coach there's actually an area there's a stage where you do that all right strata you're up okay let's see here boys one more take each okay dog hotels okay oh nice that's a fire suggestion If you're taking your dog to a dog hotel, you're ignoring reality. Because literally, anybody who owns a Subaru will watch your dog for free. Preferably, a lady in her mid-50s who's got bummer energy, your dog's going to be attracted to that Subaru driver, maybe in an orange Subaru, is what I'm imagining.

that is free dog care for your dog there's no point in going to a hotel and spending money to put your dog somewhere doesn't want to be when you can just literally go to a sprouts parking lot walk up to a Subaru and go hey i'm going to be out of town this weekend can you watch my dog in fact you don't want to come over my house and watch that they will do it step into reality stop taking your dogs to dog hotels but what if the dog wants a fun weekend like a cozy weekend Like maybe like get a room rent some cable get some room service maybe get some pussy Oh hmm I guess that's up that's a conversation you got to have with you and your dog first I guess who's planning the weekend away is what that comes down to like are you sending your dog to a dog hotel and then you're just chilling at your apartment Well, it's having a nice time getting fucked or fucking that's the real reason dogs go to dog hotels

Is there a boning? I didn't know that. How often are you sending Lola to the dog hotel to get railed? I don't do that. Yeah, the way you phrased that was crazy. That's my daughter. Yeah, but she doesn't like want to go to the dog hotel and just kind of let loose. Like a sick-ass one?

She can do that when she graduates. How old is Lola now? Three. So she's 21. Yeah, this shit's fucking me up. now, dude. She's 21. It sounds like...

Because you fucked me up more when you said it was your daughter. Now I'm thinking about sending my girl to college and the second part of what you guys said, what the fuck, man? I'm going to fucking cry. What fuck, dude? God damn it.

I just want to be happy with it. What fuck? Jesus Christ. Dude, Chad sent me, he fucking threw me a humdinger. right here. You said California Exodus. Who? Oh, shit. Dude, I was actually hot on this.

I was just looking at a graphic that came from a conservative publication. So do with it what you will. But it does align with the info I've been absorbing. California and New York led the country in 2025 in people moving out in net migration loss per 10,000 inhabitants. California was at minus 25.1. New York was at minus 28.2. Here's the thing. I fucking hate Donald Trump.

I don't say that to alienate anyone. If you voted for him, that's your choice. I don't like him. I think he's a bitch. I think he's doing a worst job this time than the first time. But we cannot ignore that California is too expensive to live in. And that is not Donald Trump. fault. Now my life, I love the pursuit of fat stacks. I'd like to have them. But if that's not the life

you want, we should still have housing, transpot, and spaces for you to chill, dude. All right? It's not good for anyone if the state's not good for everyone. And then these bitch-ass motherfuckers, dude, in L.A., they weren't going to build this new train, the K-line, to go through the job centers and major destinations in West Hollywood. Some good organizations. Some good organizations. like Streets for All and the local leadership put pressure on our mayor and we're like, no, it needs to go to the grove. It's got to go to Cedars. It should end at the Hollywood Bowl. I'm like, let's freaking go. They do their job, make her do her job. And we get the line we wanted because there was some nimbie budheads with nice houses who didn't want the train to run underground, even though the engineering proves they won't feel it. They won't hear it. It won't be bad for anything. But it's easy in California, New York to get stuff stopped because our whole. whole systems been designed by lawyers. Then I look at when it's going to be done. 2041.

We'll be dead. What the fuck, dude? They built the New York subway in four years. I know we can't go cut and cover and just, you know, be fast and loose with it. But can we just get some freaking engineers in charge? I know they could make this happen in a couple years. Don't say we need to do more studies. That's just your version of kicking the can down the road and not doing your job.

let's make California a place where all the people we love can stay. I love that, dude. You should be freaking governor. Let's go. That just fired me up, dude. Did you post something that was against Spencer Pratt? Or what's your take on him? Look, I think he makes some good points.

I'm never going to vote for him to be the mayor of any major municipality, especially one that I live in. He got the, I'm big on pro. housing stuff. He opposed SB 79, which I think was a really helpful bill for housing. Yeah, I don't like any of the options for mayor, but I'm not going to vote for him. God bless him for giving it a crack, though. I think California Exodus would be a great band name. Is that what you meant when you sent that to me? Yeah. Sorry. That's a great name. I really took it for a spin in the wrong direction.

It's a ska band. Oh, damn, the dude, you're a lot funnier than me. I fucked that up big time, dude. I'm sorry, bro. I totally fucked it, dude. I'm fucking retarded. I don't know what I'm talking about. We've entered an era where politicians now are like leaders of the day

will have at some point had bleached hair in their lives. And that's just something we have to deal with. Oh, yeah, what do you think about Tom Steyer? You know, I don't know enough about him. Seems like kind of a weiner. You've got a good eye for that. Yeah. That brings me into my next hot take.

Key word hot. I wasn't going to do this one, but Tom Steyer looking like a, you know, human doad or a human, like a lifestyle, just a doad. A weiner. JFK Jr. You know, a lot of people say he was incompetent when it came to being a lawyer, when it came, to running a magazine, all these things that maybe he wasn't the most intelligent guy. But here's the thing, he was hot. Yes.

He had aura. Yes. That is something that I think is lacking when we got dudes like Tom Steyer. Trump certainly isn't hot. Biden wasn't hot. Young Biden. Huh? Young Biden was hot.

He's good looking guy like he did. It was hot. need someone hot in the white house yeah that's the photo i'm out damn oh wow i agree we need someone hot in the white house clavicular in the white house yeah jfk junior it's it's a tragedy i think you know he would have been great if he if he had some guy smart guy behind him saying say this say that say that and he we just had his hotness and his aura i think it'd be good for the country who's the hottest person that's going to be running coming up Gavin Newsom

Newsom yeah he's done such a bad job really I'm very you know it's funny it's chat I think I kind of accidentally led you in this direction because I've been so opposed to this I a lot of the libs are saying yeah we actually do care about the looks there's another guy that they're hot on hold on I mean goes is that what people are saying Libs are trying to get a hot candidate

Yeah like Budajedge Like You need I think he just like JFK Majority people don't even know what he did They just knew he was hot He's hot

They're like He hooked up with chicks is what they knew Yeah they're like Oh Cuban Missile Crisis They don't even know what that is No They just know that John Ossif

Look him up He's another hot candidate Yeah that one And not Really? That's pretty good. That's pretty good. Too much of a weiner.

Yeah, he's a weiner. He needs a thicker neck. My mom would be like, he's a nice young man. Yeah, he needs a thicker neck. Yeah, you're right. He's got no neck. If he works out of his neck, he's got a shot. Don't worry about policy.

Worry about your neck. Got a good hit of hair, though, in a regular-looking guy for me. But not hot. We need Brad Pitt. You know who's hot? Luigi Mangione. See, I, like, I respect that take and you're smarter than I am. No, but I think, I think we got to go the other way.

You think ugly. I think the fuggliest leader in history. Because we have to, like, drain ourselves of, um, all function, not form. Yeah, because we have such a desire for like, something cinematic. Like Trump's not hot, but he's very cinematic. Yeah. And I think we need to go the other way and just like slow and boring and just squeeze all the

excitement juice out of our politicians and just like have like a engineer with cystic acne who is like awkward as fucking interviews. Like people are looking at him. He's like, I really don't want to be here. I just want to get back to working with the Fed and kind of adjusting a. you know, some macroeconomical shit. And then we're like, yeah, get back to it, bro. Yes.

I think that's a right take. Yes. Like just, like ugly, ugly. Yeah, so we can get back to focusing on other shit. Yes. Because the hotter they get, the more we're going to pay attention to it too. And they're going to like it. And everyone gets ego, you know, it's more power.

Yeah. I can't do four years of AOC being sassy and hot as president. Dude, bro. And then, like, after she, like, nails, like, some toad Republican, and she's like, well, that's what you would say, because no one wants to be around you. Now get out of my office. And then all the girls on the line the next day are like, oh, my God. Finally, like a real bitch is our leader.

I'm just going to fucking blow my brains out. I'll blow my fucking head off, dude. I mean, I rewatched. American president. It's the fucking greatest movie. I mean, Michael Douglas is perfect. Perfect.

He's perfect. Andrew Shepard, dude, I fucking love that guy. I need to watch this movie. I've never seen it. You never seen it? No. Oh, dude,

I think you and the lady would love it. Really? Isn't that Benning? It's great. Sorkin and Rob Reiner? Sorkin's a beast. I saw Sorkin yesterday.

He did? Yeah. What was his vibe? Do you seem smart? You do? He does seem smart. He wears like a nice suit, like a blade.

with like different color pulls off top very well and then has his glass his round glasses wow and he's one of those guys I saw I was like a huge fan of your work thank you thank thank you thank you it's awesome who who can you can you say who like has like who's had the best reaction when you've talked to them I usually don't say anything to anyone like something like a front-of-camera face guy good but he's like a writer and I mean of course he knows he's amazing and prolific in the man but I felt like he might appreciate someone recognizing him, right?

Oh, yeah. But like, I don't really tell anybody, and it's a general rule of thumb, like, you really shouldn't. Like, discretion is the key. But who's been like the nicest or who have I said anything to? Oh, Dan Aykroyd, speaking of aliens and shit. You love him. I love Ackroyd, and I had to tell him, and this was early on, and I was like, man, I love

everything you do. He goes, thank you very much. That's such a good point, though. a writer you're like oh they'll might actually like if it's Matt Damon you're like enough people bug him but if it's like a supporting actor like Kevin Corrigan somebody's great but maybe doesn't get their flowers enough it's like oh I'm kind of doing a cultural good right now and if you can be specific like I've never seen the West Wing but I told sort of like love the West Wing like you know he'd be like okay cool but like if you come out like like an actor that you don't

really know for some reason I'm thinking like Giovanna Robisi but I was like dude I loved you and that. I think that's kind of nice. Is that a movie? Actually, dude, you wanted the coolest thing I did? This was the coolest thing I did. When I was rewatching, Friday Night Lights, the actress who plays Tara, forget her name.

Oh, my God, Adriana Lipinski was at the hotel, and I got her car, and I go, clear her ass, full heart. And she goes, can't lose. And I go, yeah, bro. I am shocked. She wasn't a bigger star. She's so good in that show, and she's obviously very attractive.

I she to me she's like a like a stronger and Jill Lee who were her like physically stronger who was she going up against like in her career was like probably what early mid thousand like 25 to 10 who was taking the movie roles at that time she could have been like a Mia Joakovich roles she was in John Wick she was good in John Wick yeah she's great yeah oh is she the other assassin yeah she's great in John Witt yeah she's awesome you could have seen her having a TV show like was she going up against Jennifer Garner or Jennifer Garner a different

Yeah I don't know maybe Galgado Got all the parts Oh you're you know what Maybe you're right Is Galgadoo As much as we love Galgadoo The acting It's not exactly on the same

caliber as What's the name? What's the actress's name that played Tara sorry I'm blanking on her name again Adriana Lipinski Palicki Adela Yeah Galgado

She's getting roasted online. Is she, I wonder if... For political stuff? Her acting. Oh. Yeah, it's not great. It was perfect in Wonder Woman. They did a really good job of...

Yeah. Like, devising the perfect part for her. Can you imagine all the people? Honestly, that might have been the end of it. I know we're ending here. I just had one quick trivia question that tripped me up. I wonder if you guys could answer it, figure it out. It's kind of along the lines what we've been talking about.

There's only one president ever that has not lived in the White House. Who is it? George Washington. Damn, you're a genius. It wasn't built. Yeah, wow. Genius. Skill, baby, I love that.

It's my dog. Dude, I heard, I think it was from Shane Gillis and Louis C.K. That one of Reagan's aides after he, after his inauguration, came into the White House and I think he like came into the West Wing or somehow into the bedroom and he said it smelled like fuck really he and Nancy got after it I love that