Going Deep with Chad and JT - Ep. 45 - Sopranos Characters, Serena Williams, Joe's Dating Life

Episode Date: November 21, 2018

In episode 45, Uncle Joe joins us with his high T levels and massive hog. We determine which Sopranos character each one of us would be, address the recent Serena Williams controversy, dive into Joe's dating life, and much, much more. Get stoked, stoke nation. For bonus content, check out our patreon: www.patreon.com/chadgoesdeep

what's up stokers of stoke nation this is chad k coming in kroger whatever you want to say of uh the going deep with chad jt podcast this is episode 45 i think so 45 with my dog compadre John Thomas. What up? What up, dog? How you doing? Good, dude. Good. I was sprinting this morning at the gym, and then I looked at navigation, and it was like,

you got to leave now, dog, so I'm all sweaty. Oh, you didn't get to shower? Yeah, I didn't get to shower. Well, those pheromones are going to make their way over to me, and I'm looking forward to it. Yeah, going to make you guys horny. Speaking of, we got our dog in the audience in the pod today. In the house. The man himself, masculinity incarnate, Big Joe.

What up? Yeah, you're welcome for me being here. I'm starting out cocky this morning. I got it coming heavy because what i drove joe over here you know we're roommates yeah okay when he didn't sleep a lot last night because he said he had too much pressure to wake up early to do the pod we're recording the pod early in the morning which is different for us and um joe has never been louder in his life than on the drive over here when he he's tired, he doesn't get more quiet.

He gets loud. He's taking calls from Toyota, just screaming at the guys like, nah, I've been driving less. I've been driving less. I wasn't mad. I just, because they're asking me, why haven't you been in for, it's been about five months you've been in for service. Like, well, I'm not putting as many miles as I was.

Good, stick it to them. They're just trying to take your money. Yeah. So I could come in for a $50 oil change. Trying to get me on that. Dude, those oil changes are ridiculous. That's going to be $70, and you're like. For pouring the can.

Man, I just need to watch a YouTube video and just, like, learn that shit. But, nah. That's true. No, it takes too much time. Yeah. All you got to do to watch a YouTube video and just learn that shit, but nah. That's true. No, it takes too much time. Yeah. All you got to do is watch the YouTube video. I've never learned something from a YouTube video, except for how to tie my tie and how to put my boxing wraps on.

Dude, everything's on YouTube. It's replacing college, dude. I've learned way more from... I don't remember anything from college. Do you ever talk to people that are like, yeah, my favorite professor in college. I'm like, you remember one professor's name from college? you ever talk to people they're like yeah my favorite professor in college i'm like you remember one professor's name from no i have none none i don't i never talked to them i studied philosophy they're like who's your favorite philosopher i'm like

next question yeah kelly slater yeah dude you're good at teaching yourself stuff from youtube though oh thanks man because you'll like teach like editing tricks and stuff like that and then when i can't figure out a computer thing you're like youtube it i'm like chad you might as well have told me to never find out the answer nice well i i became way more interested in learning after college right like once i got out of college i was like man learning is fun but while i was in college i think maybe because people were trying to tell me to learn I was like fuck. I was the same way. I didn't learn anything. My brother used to tell me that when teachers would assign me books, I'd read other books by the author.

Joe, what'd you study? I studied drinking and eating. Which did you major in? Majored in eating, minored in drinking well yeah i mean i i went to university of iowa my freshman year of college didn't declare a major uh put on about 30 pounds nice we've seen some of the photos yeah i um i just went after it. How did you lose all that weight? I basically quit drinking and then started eating a normal human amount. This was me.

Back then, you go out drinking, then you go to a food place after. I would go to two food places. I would eat, and then I'd be like, oh i i think i should eat more just because yeah right i already had a i had a gyros i might as well chase it with a grilled cheese did you have like a reputation amongst your friends for being like the most prodigious eater oh yeah it was a savage yeah i mean it was nuts yeah did it set you up now you do food reviews on instagram joe eats did it all set you up for that um possibly yeah i mean i always had that love for food and it would bring it brings joy so you would have made a great sopranos character just eating with t Tony Yeah for sure Just like Joe eating

If you guys were in the Sopranos Who do you think you'd be? I'd like to be Pauly I don't think I don't think my personality matters Yeah you kind of got the flow Oh thank you guys so much Except for the balding

He's pretty bald The flow, his attitude his laugh i can't can you do it i think that's it people would you tell me that i looked like that i looked like aj oh yeah you do a little bit yeah i heard he was a real moron like in real life well yeah and his characters suck i heard they made the character moron because that's what he was like maybe the he tried to act they'd be like just be yourself i met one of the a guy who's a little person who was in an episode of the sopranos and they shot it he was like the nightclub like uh concierge or something where aj's at the nightclub and i asked him i was like oh you were in that nightclub scene with aj's like yeah we shot it there because

he partied there every night so the director like, we'll just go to where you are. Nice. Who would you be? I could see you being Tony. Thank you, dude. I appreciate that because growing up, my dad used to tell me I was a lot like AJ. Really? Oh, dude, that's a sick burn.

Dude, it stuck with me. Yeah, you're not, I don't know, you're not really a Tony, I would say. But don't you think he has that same conflict within him? Yeah, but he doesn't have the leadership or the responsibility. You're so full of it. I am your leader. No, I've got a couple bosses, and you're not one of them. All right, it came to a standstill. was a good shutdown i thought yeah hey take that

who would you oh we have to figure out a character who uh i guess i do think tony no i could see you being like a sylvia oh sylvia no i don't i don't see sylvia i see um who's the yeah you're kind of sneaky. How am I sneaky? Why am I forgetting his name? The nephew. Christopher? I can see his Christopher. I could be Christopher.

Oh, yeah. Yeah, there you go. That's you. Yeah. I'd be big pussy. Dude, yes. Except I would never shoot you. Because I like big pussies, that's the only reason why

Alright, let's get into it I could see a I could be Bobby Bacala I think I'd be more He's too nice I'm a nice guy You are a nice guy, but you have that, like, bite.

He doesn't have that bite. Yeah, he's gentle. He's very soft. Yeah. He beat the fuck out of Tony when they fought, though. That's true. What about Ralph? Yeah, Ralph Cifaretto.

I got a little Ralph in me. What is he? Janice. She was a wild one. Dude, Janice. Dude, what does Ralph say to Tony beforealph say to tony before tony kills him he's like he's like you care more about that horse but you eat oh yeah i forget that because all of a sudden you're fucking humanitarian you eat fucking pork and beef by the truckload

oh yeah because he was mad because they killed the horse right yeah yeah yeah that's great i forgot i gotta rewatch some that show is hilarious it's the funniest show ever dude it's so funny all right dude guys we have some serious questions that uh came in from the stokers this one is just going to be general conversation not in the questions section. So Joe, a big running topic on the show has been, a big running topic on the podcast has been, how do you poke schmoles out of the group? Excuse me?

Let me translate. So a schmole is like an undesirable in the group, like someone who's kind of clinging on that wants to hang out with you, but isn't anyone's favorite person and most of the time is pretty annoying and kind of dropping the collective happiness of the group yeah and to boke them means to kick them out or to excommunicate them so obviously that's a hard thing to do because you know you're dealing with people and we're sensitive and a lot of the stokers are wondering how do they poke the schmoles out of the group?

How do you go about doing something like that? Well, first off, I'd like to say I've never been that person. So I feel bad if you're that person. But, you know, get cool. What can I tell you? Also, I would say you have to start out by just ignoring them. And, you know, if you're doing a group text, maybe start a side text without them. You know, establish rapport with the people that you're trying to still hang out with

and then just kind of try to ignore them until they get the hint, basically. I think one issue with a lot of schmoles, and I think I came up with a good definition of a schmole, it's someone who reacts negatively to a mangina. Yeah. I think you can test someone's character, and it's a good judge of character, if you like mangina a dude, and they go, nice,

and you're like, you're a solid guy. But if they go, oh, dude, what are you doing? You're like, you're not cool. I like if they go, oh, dude, what are you doing? You're like, you're not cool. I like that. Can I add an addendum? Yeah. I think another identifying quality of a schmole is that when they do a mangina, it's not funny. Yes.

Too much hair or something? Just something's off. They do it and you're like, cut it out. That was a too little too buffalo billish right you like cross the line a weirdness creeps into it yeah i can't do one yeah you're too well yeah you got too big of a dong yeah yeah it flops it squeezes through your legs no matter what i can't even wear uh i mean i have to get too graphic but i people tell me to wear like tight like tighter jeans like wear skinny jeans and i tell them get too graphic but i people tell me to wear like tight like tighter

jeans like wear skinny jeans and i tell them i can't and i don't go into it why but i can't because it's because people people will think you're a pressure yeah well yeah you got to write a book at some point called like the bulge the unforeseen difficulties of having a huge package the battle of the bulge Oh, that's beautiful. Dude, so back to the Schmoles, though. Was that World War II? Chad and I were talking about it before we hit record, and I think it's a really tough situation because you don't...

For me, the worst thing you can see is to see someone feeling left out. Have you seen someone's face when they feel left out it's tough yeah and it's also have you ever like broken up with a friend yeah yeah i've done it a couple times in life it's it's tough but you have to do it well yeah you're you're a good person to talk to about it because you'll actually do that sometimes the person's gonna keep hitting you up and hitting you up and then you're just like you know what you got to stop calling me yeah I

there's one issue I think a lot of stokers have too is that schmoles because you want them to get the hint a lot of them don't get the hint they're in such denial that they're like I'm just going to stay in it persistence which is an issue.

I'd say I go about it the least honorable way. I just sort of ignore them, you know. But whenever I see them, I'm nice. But it's obviously fake. And, yeah, I ignore them. And then if they're like, hey, so why was I invited to this thing? I just play dumb. I'm like, oh, I don't know.

Yeah. And, you know, it's not truthful. I got to say I'm not honorable with that, but that's my method. But I don't think there's any humane way really to boke a schmole. I think the best thing you can do is just let the schmole hang around. The best thing you can do is just let the schmole hang around. I think most, I think, like, every group has a little fly in the ointment, you know, someone who keeps it from being perfect.

Yeah. And that's just kind of the bittersweet pill of life. Or let him get upset at, like, he'll be like, well, hey, I'm the only one trying at this relationship. Like, let him call you out right like hey why aren't you hit me up and then then you could man up and confront and be like hey see ya did i um oftentimes i found whenever you actually succeed in boking the schmole um a lot of times they're you kind of feel worse you know what i mean yeah like you successfully do it and then you just like oh damn like i love you know now i feel bad because it feels good to be nice feels good to be nice and then so when you

kind of keep them around you know it can suck but it's like it's like well i'm being good to this dude whatever uh unless they're a complete asshole yeah but it could also be good to be honest too because then that's true like what you're talking about then you're just hanging out with them out of sympathy it's not even you don't want to hang out with them just hanging out because you feel bad yeah that's that's bad intentions yeah i don't know, though. I mean, to allow someone to be part of your community, I think is beneficial for them. And I think that kind of takes it out of the realm of, it is patronizing, but I think overall it still does good, being good to them.

Yeah, I mean, you guys sound very holy, but I don't know if that's... There's that Abraham Lincoln quote quote this might be a reach but like do i not destroy my enemy when i make him my friend i never heard that but um but when you do feel like people are excommunicating you man that's rough. When you feel left out, it's the worst thing I've ever seen. That is loneliness.

It is. Like when you were in grade school and everyone's like, ditch JT. Oh, that's funny. Yeah. I never felt more acute pain in my life. It's funny to me that like that stuff is like nationwide because

like i remember that you know where i grew up well i always went to catholic schools so i i feel like bullying was kind of like you always had god on your side so i've always felt like if i was bullied i believe you know what god loves me so it doesn't matter say what you want fuck yeah yeah i uh there's actually a lot of bible verses about dealing with bullies i like what you want. Fuck yeah. Yeah, I... There's actually a lot of Bible verses about dealing with bullies. I like what you're saying, Joe. Yeah, I think bullying... I think more empathy is good, but I think you can have too much to the point

where you don't make any progress as a society, where you're just super... Which is, you know, I'm too nice, you know, so, you know. But I think, you know, people got um but i think uh you know people gotta learn they gotta keep because you learn the best from failure and getting beat down then coming back up you know and you gotta have that in society you can't just like make everyone a freaking uh what's that guy in seinfeld balloon boy or something? Bubble Boy? Bubble Boy.

People got to take some shit, I think. You can't just be super nice to everyone. That's boring as fuck. Nothing's finer than being in your diner. That was that episode. I just think organized. I'm mean to people and stuff, but I think it's normally in the flow of my day.

Well, yeah, I let people have it. i don't mean any ill will but i like being honest with people yeah be honest with people my brother's crew had a schmall and i would always be like be nicer to him but then when i spent like a couple days with him i was like all right you got to kill this motherfucker yeah but then they would do stuff to him like he got his come up and but they never excommunicated him like he would do something stupid and then they would do stuff to him. Like, he got his comeuppance, but they never excommunicated him. Like, he would do something stupid, and then they would do something to him, you know? What do you have to do is just stop inviting people and stuff, and then they find out that you're doing stuff,

and then they get mad, and then they go do their own stuff because people get the hint. Like, that was... Like, honestly, growing up, that happened more often, probably, than I remember. Because it's like I... Like, I've got've got like my same

friend group now but growing up i mean i probably changed friends a decent amount and then yeah you just get sick of people and you stop inviting them to stuff and then they and then people figure people the natural way of life is be like oh okay well they don't want to hang out with me i'll go hang out with people that want to hang out with me then they go do other stuff with other people this guy this schmold that my brother had in this group they all my brother and all of his friends moved off campus and got a house and they didn't invite him to be in the house well done so then he got an air mattress and put it downstairs at the house oh dude that i wouldn't sleep there like every night who told him to come nobody he just you know they threw parties he knew where they lived and he brought an air mattress and stayed there so this is a very resilient schmull

and then one night he like fucked over my brother somehow like he like broke my brother's door or something and my brother scissored his uh air mattress nice yeah good move but isn't that but he but he still didn't excommunicate him that's the big thing for thing for me. They had their graduation party at the guy's house. You know what I mean? Well, then did he bring a sleeping bag after the air mattress was done? And then his speech at the graduation, he said, guys, I know I bug you guys a lot, but thank you for letting me be a part of the crew. Wow.

Yeah, he genuinely said that. Yeah, so. Yeah, that's brutal um all right guys i was um um if you guys let a group of men or a group of women or a group of men and women what do you think the ideal size would be i wrote this down or a group of women or a group of men and women, what do you think the ideal size would be? I wrote this down. Less than 10. Me plus 7 is probably 8.

Probably 8? Why 8? Yeah, I mean, I'd say about as many that could fit around this table right now. So you think of it as like a kitchen dinner situation? Yeah. A dinner situation. How many people around the table is perfect? Yeah, I couldn't lead a big organization. Where everybody's able to talk to each other and stuff?

Yeah, I want direct contact with everyone. In times like these, I turn to one of my heroes, John Taffer, where he said, he's like's like you know my grandpa told me this the surefire way of success is to be the smartest guy in the room and then he's like but i made an addendum to that you want to be the smartest guy in the room for what you do but then you want to surround yourself with people who are smartest at what they do so So you create a full-on team. You know what I mean? So I think that's the kind of... I'd like to lead a team like that. I think the number would probably be around six or seven.

And they'd each have an elite skill. Marketing, typing, beverages, food, booze, activities, romance, and conspiracies. That's a solid squad. Good crew. Fuck yeah, dude. Everyone's an expert in one of those things. I like typing.

Typing, yeah. But then you'd be the leader of the experts, you're saying? What? What would I be a leader in? Well, maybe your expert trait is leadership. Or sprints. Yeah. Yeah.

So I heard that in in a chimp populations, stability breaks down at like 50 or something like that. And then in a old nomadic human tribes, it broke down at like one 50 and then it's tough to get like your, your message across. So I would go with just one, just me. Okay.

That's bold and noble. I dig it. Yeah, good stuff. Just to keep it sensitive, Chad and I went to a couples counseling. We did. It was, I really enjoyed it. I was nervous as fuck.

Dude, I was going to say, you want an adrenaline rush? Yeah. Go into couples counseling, dude. With one of your dogs with your fucking bro dude your dearest dog dude the first question so what what frustrates you the most i'm like jesus lady dude the way you repeated it you went frustrates you're like do i have to pick something in that category i thought she's gonna be so gentle would just be like tell me about yourself although she did kind of lead it down that path i can't believe you guys did that

it was great it was good dude it made me nervous but it was good i mean dude we worked together why do you need a third party you know just talk i think sometimes it's hard to say stuff because you're like worried you'll say it wrong you know what i mean and a therapist basically guarantees you that you'll say it right yeah because they're not going to let you get away from they're good at knowing what you're trying to say and they're good at knowing how you should say that you couldn't say to him hey chad what bothers you about me you need somebody else to say that yeah yeah okay you should do it joe um i know this is a sensitive spot but the kicker for the bears hit four uprights on sunday joe you're a huge bears fan i know this kicker was your former beef of the week do you care to amplify on on what i just said yeah i mean this guy's getting a lot of air time here. Well, yeah, I mean, it's an absolute joke.

There's nothing else I could really say. It's just, I mean, they're keeping him, so I hope he improves. All right, news story this week. Serena Williams was named GQ's woman of the year. Well deserved. And there's some backlash because they put woman in quotes. Why'd they do that? So I guess this is one of those situations where the artist does that for everything he does.

I think it's a dude. Does that for everything he does. He puts everything in quotes. think it's a dude does that for everything does he puts everything in quotes like that's his trademark and then he was in charge of this issue so he put woman in quotes but obviously that's easily misinterpreted as like quotes is like i don't you know oh she's not a woman she's not a woman yeah and so people were pissed and they're like really gq like in quotes like serena Williams, like, fuck you. I think, I think he just didn't even know that Serena Williams had ever been picked

on for being manly. Like he's so oblivious. He's so in his artist world, he's like oblivious to like the media narratives around her and the way like, you know, YouTube comments work. And he's just like, yeah, I'll just do what I always do, put it in quotes. And then they were like, don't you understand how that's bad? He's like, no, I really don't.

He's too innocent. Maybe he was aware of it, but he's like, but don't you think it'd be worse if I didn't do my trademark? That's so true. Yeah. Do people say Miss Ring is manly? Super hot. She could beat my ass, but yeah, she's great.

I'm into her, yeah. Yeah, me too. Me too. She's married now with kids. Yeah, to the guy who started Reddit. She's very much a woman, yeah. Oh, yeah? Oh, really?

Yes. Yeah, that guy. Co-founder of Reddit, yeah. Yeah, I mean, I think Serena's going to be fine. I don't think she needs all these people going to bat for her. I think she's doing all right. All right, let's get into our questions. Nice.

Should we do babes and beasts? Oh, I thought we were going to do them afterwards. You want to do them before? Oh, let's do questions. Okay. What up, brothers? I've got an issue. I've been talking to this girl for ages on Snapchat,

and we both liked each other, but she's super awkward. And no matter how hard I try, the conversation isn't really going anywhere. The other night during a night out clubbing, she introduced me to her best friend, and we talked and joked about heaps. We got along really well, and I kind of felt a spark with the best friend that I haven't felt with the first girl. So now I have a crush on the best friend and don't see any future with the first girl.

Do you boys have any advice on how I should go about dealing with this sish? And do you think I should make an attempt to keep talking to the best friend? Cheers. Please don't include my name. Did the first girl, was he making progress with her? Yeah, he says he's been talking to her for ages, but that the conversation doesn't really go anywhere. But then they went clubbing together. It's a little confusing.

Yeah, there's a lot going on there, but like the uh the best friend is the one to go for yeah it doesn't sound like either him or the original girl really got to a place where it would be a problem for him to pursue someone else even if that person's close to yeah the conversation wasn't going anywhere but what does it like feel an obligation that oh i'm already talking to her so this is her friend yeah i don't think she's that into him yeah it doesn't i think you're safe they're going for the best friend yeah it sounds like he talked it out himself on that and maybe if the original girl is would potentially be upset by it maybe draw it out a little bit you know give it some time to breathe and then yeah like slowly detach yeah yeah i also think this guy sounds like he's uh

going pretty fast yeah like inside like with how he's feeling and stuff yeah so i'd say just slow down a little bit you know these things will happen just keep talking to the other girl let it progress and it'll it'll be much more organic than it feels like it's going to be. Yeah. Go make a smoothie. Yeah. Hit the gym. And then, you know, wait for love to unfold.

War on scooters. John. Dear Chad and John Thomas. First off, what's up? Stoked on the pod and truly love the bond you guys have. It's an inspiration of bros everywhere. Thank you, man. My name is John, and recently stoked levels have taken a hit

due to some unfortunate news I recently received. Living on the East Coast, I feel we as a common collective are less adaptive to new technologies and ways of life. This all seemed to change when about a month ago, my city I currently reside in for schooling purposes was graced and blessed with the emergence of these two-wheeled electric steeds that were gifts from the gods. I'm sorry.

I'm going to have to go through a little quicker. Well, what are you writing? A whole paragraph? Yeah, it was long. The scooters have been banned from his campus, and he wants to get them back. This is something that we've been getting from a lot of stokers about how the uh the limes and the birders and birds are not making it appreciate all feedback bros and just to remind you guys heroes get remembered legends never die boom clap um it's a good sandlot uh babe ruth um well here's

the thing i mean i bet those kids weren't wearing helmets maybe if they were wearing helmets then they wouldn't say oh this isn't safe but they're probably just cruising around on those things all wild and reckless probably one of the one of the professors probably got breezed by one and they're like oh this these kids are idiots get. We're not doing this crap. You know? Sounds like you're one of the professors. Yeah, well, put helmets on. I bet that's what I'm saying.

I bet, I don't know, you guys know where I stand on these scooters. I don't like them. Legislation takes a long time. If you really want to make your mark purchase your own bird scooter i think they're on amazon or something and just be like well i'm just getting my own no matter what you guys yeah that'd be interesting if you if you have your own can they tell you not to if you're like this is mine I guess they could still tell you not to. You could probably spray paint your name on it and just be like, this is Chad's. I think.

That's kind of surprising that a college campus would ban those. You'd feel like they would be pretty open to everything. You need to fight the fights that need fighting. Your college campus needs these scooters. you need to fight the fights that need fighting. Your college campus needs these scooters. You need to form a committee that works either with or sometimes against the administration to make sure that these scooters are allowed. That means having rallies, meetings, getting a coalition together,

and getting local support on your side. And it might be a long, arduous process, but the fight is worth fighting. You need these scooters. Turn into the hero, legend, leader that you naturally are, and get these fucking things roving. That was fire advice. Does it say what school? I'm guessing Harvard, but no.

Probably to add to that, maybe the whole coalition, they could get scooters and they'd be like, we're going to scoot no matter what. We're going to scoot no matter what. Sort of like in Braveheart. Yeah, it could be Harvard. It's probably one of those elitist schools

because they're probably like, oh, we look like trash after arriving around on these things. What are we, peasants? We ride fixie bikes. Warning, kind of long. Even if you wanted to hit me up via email, that'd be tight. Sup, boys?

I find myself in an interesting position and could use some solid advice. I was dating this super dope girl for a while and legit loved her. However, she switched universities and things kind of fizzled from there. She's awesome and our breakup was 100% circumstantial, so there wasn't much closure. She recently moved back to town and is showing clear inches. We dated over two years ago but I am confident we would still be together had she stuck around but for some reason I am just not super inclined to give it a shot. Likely because there's another girl in the mix. The other girl

is so incredibly dope. We get along crazy well but I have a feeling I am becoming that really chill guy friend and I'm pretty sure she wouldn't be down to date. She's also a freshman, and my freshman year in college as this young single was so sick, I wouldn't want to take that from her if we started dating. But the main reason I'm hesitant to shoot my shot is because I really value our current relationship, and if us dating isn't going to work out, I don't want to risk our friendship for nothing. I also might be romanticizing a relationship with her.

We might just be better as friends you know dog i think uh you're overthinking this big time yeah whoa i mean this is heavy stuff yeah you're like coming up with all these like potential reasons why you might be wrong and like why you shouldn't trust your instincts it's like dude you have a crush on her. You need to ask her out. Yeah, listen to your dong in this sitch. Yeah, and I can see the thing with the other girl. You not want, because it's been like two years. You just kind of, you moved on.

You know, you're young. Yeah, let that one go. I didn't feel any passion from the former one. I didn't either. Yeah, so it's like, yeah, it's like she's obviously not the one. If she came back in your life and you're not feeling it so yeah i think maybe just be friends with her i think i think this dude is uh i think he's just scared that the relation with this new girl won't work out that's why he's creating all these reasons you know like the one of like you know i my senior my freshman year was so dope because i was single i went when i would change that for her i'm like well she's gonna decide whether she wants to be single

freshman year or not you know she'll tell you yeah that's weird he sounds like what am i gonna like he's gonna ruin her fun so go for it you know yeah ask her out release the tape from your leg and let that dong hang legendary senior quote for the school yearbook. Kendall. Hey, dudes, my name's Kendall, and I'm a big fan of the pod. I have an urgent dilemma. So my senior quote for our yearbook is do this Friday. I haven't been able to find a quote that has enough stoke so that all the stokers could appreciate it.

So this guy wants to... I'm going to skip this one as well. I'm sorry, guys. This guy wants us to do a senior quote for him. And we really appreciate that opportunity. Find the stoke within. What do you got? I like the line from Clear and Present Danger.

I think I've quoted it before. When the president tries to get Harrison Ford's character, Jack Ryan, to help with a cover-up. And then Harrison Ford, Jack Ryan, looks at the president tries to get Harrison Ford's character, Jack Ryan, to help with a cover-up. And then Harrison Ford, Jack Ryan, looks at the president and says, Sorry, Mr. President, I don't dance. I like that. Joe? What, my senior quote?

Yeah. Oh, man. I'm trying to think of something um here's to the night um i don't know what do you have i just do find the stoke within um here's to the night we felt alive are you gonna do the rest of it or you're just gonna find the stoke within. Here's to the night we felt alive. Are you going to do the rest of it, or are you just going to leave it here? Here's to the night. How about this?

For a senior quote. Make sure you don't leave high school a virgin. Don't put that on these youngsters. Why? Because it's fine to leave high school a virgin. Says who? And I was prom king. You know, there used to be a time when people would get made fun of that.

Yeah. Wait, you were prom king as a virgin? Yeah. You can't do that. Well, I pulled it off. That's not right. I pulled it off. Winner, formal king.

Who voted for you? I was shocked when I didn't win two years in a row. Oh, let's vote this guy who doesn't get chicks, the prom king. What are you... This should have been like a king of like... Dudes who don't get laid. That's you. I don't know.

I couldn't think of something better. I mean, I wasn't the prom king, but't get laid. That's you. I don't know. I couldn't think of something better. I mean, I wasn't the prom king, but I got laid on prom. Well, you've got some options, Kendall. All right, here's a question from John. Guys, I've had a rough one. I went to a party the other night, and this guy JC challenged me to a fight.

I didn't really want to fight him, but I had no choice. He was mad at me because I had sex with his girlfriend, or ex-girlfriend rather. But a lot of guys have done that. But he chose to take it out on me. We fought in front of a bunch of people, and sadly he beat my ass. My nose was pretty fucked up, my eye was black. But I got up afterwards and went up to jc and told him i had fun fighting him trying to be the bigger man he then told me if i ever talked to him like that

again he'd fuck me up again i had to hang out at the party afterwards it was a sick party but i don't think i had as much fun as i could have had what do you guys think my attitude should be when i go to school on monday so well what does he want to know he wants to know what his energy should be he said it's it was fun fighting you what kind of what is that and he got his ass kicked i think he was trying to play it cool like oh it's not a big deal i got my ass kicked do i think he's got to come in i can't relate smiling and joking you know pointing at people like yeah joey hilarious party that night dude i got fucked up stuff like that yeah i would yeah i play it cool i think that's a good way to go yeah it's just jokey or he could come in super alpha and she'd be like i'm gonna fuck that guy up dude that's what i would do man i would be

super nice on the surface and then every day after, I'd be hitting the fucking boxing gym. Like Rocky III montage. Working on those hands. Yeah, let this failure motivate you to never have this failure again. And it's all good, dude. We all get our asses kicked. And getting your ass kicked in front of a bunch of people, that's fuel, baby. That's a lot of fuel to put into that engine.

Yeah. You're going to have that in your tank, and you're going to be in a business meeting one day, and you're going to dominate it have that in your tank and you're just gonna like you're gonna be in a business meeting one day and you're gonna dominate it because you got your ass beat and then also ask ask like he fought you because you were the easiest one to fight so this jc guy like he's a plonk he doesn't deserve any sort of credit for the beat down he administered it's a jc's everyone's hooking up with jc's ex-girlfriend so he's fighting everyone that's boning i think he only fought this guy because this guy was the most easy to fight yeah see i don't like that that's bullshit yeah because that's not real like uh honor well then maybe that guy's like the the easy fall guy i don't know maybe he should form a coalition of dudes who

bone jc's ex-girlfriend and then they collectively beat his ass. JC, that's a good fighter name. That guy sounds like he can fight. Sounds like he's from a movie. The alpha of the chimp group isn't the... He doesn't rule because he's the strongest, but because he leads a large and stable coalition. Mark Wahlberg, an Italian job. Yep. All right, guys.

Joe. All right, guys. Joe, who is your babe of the week? Oh, thank you for asking. Susan Ward. She is an actress. I've been thinking about her recently. She's in blockbusters like the in crowd and uh shallow hell and she's just um she's one of the most beautiful people i've ever seen and i'm glad that i i remember her and i haven't seen her anything in a while but she was like to me just a straight up babe and just so cool good on camera and just love watching her on stuff she's great

she knows who she is yeah she's gorgeous i love it i love it chad who is your babe of the week my babe of the week is paris hilton um there's an obvious thing she's beautiful but also she's a marketing whiz i thought i should honor her for that you know there's a good article i found that paris hilton fooled america with a baby voice and dominated and that's what she did dude she came out she disrupted celebrity culture in a way that no one ever had ever seen before she dominated reality tv people can be like oh it's from a sex tape you know and i'm like well you know let's see your sex tape turn into a billion dollar enterprise okay so let's see you bone on camera i don't see them selling two billion dollars in perfume after double anal okay so why don't you think about that

um but yeah i just wanted to acknowledge her you know she was great in the simple life um she was just uh she did super well in that carl's junior commercial you best believe i got double bacon western cheeseburger after i saw that commercial you best best believe that. And I ate it on top of my Ford Escape Hybrid. Nice. And board shorts. I think she needs to be acknowledged for how smart she actually is and good on her for all her success. And she's a DJ too.

She spins beats. Really? Yeah. That was awesome. Thanks. My Baby of the Week is the actor chris pine he has a new movie out on netflix this uh week called outlaw king which is like a more faithful telling of the robert the bruce story in braveheart they kind of make robert the bruce a weakling who

at the end finally gets strong and does what he's supposed to, but only after, you know, betraying William Wallace and costing him his life. And Chris Pine plays him pretty well in this movie. I'm not a big Scottish accent guy, but he kind of talks in a low voice, so you can't really tell if the accent's good or not. And I have to say, on the whole, I haven't finished the film yet,

but I found it underwhelming. It's not the kind of epic I was looking for. I need more inspiration. I need more inspiration. I need bigger set pieces of just flaming balls and broadswords. That was the other thing. In Braveheart, it's broadswords. In this movie, it's regular swords. So you're saying why make him your babe of the week then?

Because it doesn't sound like you're that enamored with the film or the performance. That's what I'm saying, yeah. Well, I'll tell you why. He dropped dong. What? He flashed dong in the movie. That's what I'm saying, yeah. Well, I'll tell you why. He dropped dong. What? He flashed dong in the movie. What? It's a wide shot, as far as I can tell.

You looked at him? And you don't really see the dong that well. I tried. And you can't really make out much about the dong. But any A-list actor, and I consider Chris Pine A-list, who flashes dong, especially if he doesn't have a big dong, and normalizes dongs being out and not being at their strongest i think is healthy for you know positive male sexual uh body positivity and uh

i thank you chris pine because a lot of guys won't do that you drop dong and as a guy who learned to love his body by dropping dong, I appreciate what you're putting out there on a huge platform like Netflix. So Chris Pine, you're my baby of the week. Thanks for dropping dong. That was amazing. Joe,

who is your, thank you, Joe, who is your legend of the week? Uh, kind of a genre of music. Yes. Does that,

does that work? Yeah. I, um um i grew up on 90s alternative rock and um i i love it to this day i still listen to it regularly uh pearl jam nirvana alice in chains the offspring um so many more uh Temple Pilots. To me, that's some of the best music ever made, and I just, all those guys, I mean, a lot of them are, you know, they're dead now, which is very sad, but they made incredible music that I'll probably listen to my whole life. I'll probably be an old man listening to 90s alternative rock.

I love it. Can you give us a few cuts? I'll probably be an old man listening to 90s alternative rock. I love it. Can you give us a few cuts? You want me to sing some tunes? Or can you say a few of the song titles and we can reminisce about them? Yeah, I mean, sure. Like Alice in Chains, Wood. Great song.

Stone Temple Pilots. Wicked Garden is one. Pearl Jam, Nothing Man, Nirvana, In Bloom, Lithium, all those. Awesome. You're a historian. The Offspring, Self Esteem, great song. One of the best songs ever. Yeah. It's a big range chad who is your

legend of the week my legend of the week is this guy he's a french dance artist salif la source i think that's how you say it he's blown up on instagram uh you guys may have seen the rock shared a video of him i think chris brown should have Rock shared a video of him. I think Chris Brown shared a video of him. A lot of big names shared videos of him dancing. He's this dancer. He just dances all around Paris. He loves Michael Jackson, which so I was obviously I saw him dancing like Michael, and I'm like, damn, dude, you really got Michael locked in,

and I totally respect that. And he's just blown. He's like 1.4 million followers now. He was on Ellen last week dancing like michael and uh yeah stokers if you want some uh uplifting videos of a talented dude dancing like michael sort of like the next michael except i don't know if he can sing check out salif underscore crook boys with Z at the end. This guy is smooth. He's dancing around Paris. All these videos make you feel good.

Every time I watch him, I'm just like, damn, I'm in a good mood. You know, I really like that. It's very inspiring. Just smile on his face. Dancing in public. What could be better than that? Not much. And he dominated on Ellen.

So I just wanted to acknowledge him for having fire moves and just taking the world by storm by just dancing in the streets. Dancing in the streets. My legend of the week is Vortrees. Nice. Vortrees is a bro of all of ours. He's been teaching me how to box for a couple years now. The guy's got hands.

When he hits the bag, when I'm with him, it moves. He's quick, explosive, hard-nosed, funny guy, softball coach of Joe's. Yes, we won a championship together. He brought out the best in you on the field. Yeah. And he played like a man possessed. I went to your guys' championship game, and he slid into home plate headfirst

and took out the catcher's knees. It was a violent act of determination. I thought there was going to be a torn ACL there. I thought he went a little too far on that one. But I respected the motivation to win and to put it all on the line and to not be afraid of the consequences. Yeah, especially me being already hurt, him laying it out like that, sacrificing his body.

It's inspiring. He's a great guy. He's always inspiring, super smart and funny. And he's got a dark sense of humor which a lot of the legends of the week have and what i mean by dark is like when you're confronted by like the horrible stuff that life does to you instead of giving you like uh like an optimistic outlook he'll just be like yeah you're fucked and then we hit the meds yeah so robert i appreciate you you've been a good friend you're're a great boxing instructor. You're a hilarious dude.

Keep throwing them hands, brother. Yeah, whatever, Robert. Yeah, he's the man. He's a good dude. What was the other legend you were thinking? I was going to do Hunter Gatherers because I found out they only work 35-hour work weeks. Go for it. There it is.

I'm done. All right, Joe, who is your beef of the week? All right. Yeah, I've had a real problem with this for a while. My Beef of the Week is people that throw their cigarettes out of their car windows when they're driving. I hate that. And, like, today I saw one that was, like, still, like, full burning. Like, it looked like a road flare that flare that like the cops put up after like a car crash just smoke i mean with all these fires going on you know you're throwing open

flames out the window i don't like that put it out in your car and leave it in your car because also you can get in trouble for littering throwing cigarettes out the window you're not supposed to do it i know a guy who got pulled over so keep the cigarettes in your car or better yet don't smoke you know and even this week too i was talking to people about the air quality and someone's talking to me about air quality while they're smoking the cigarette well i'm like why am i going to talk to you you know you, you're already breathing in the fire voluntarily. So let's not get on an air quality talk here now. God.

Yeah, and I get scared too when I drive over a cigarette that's burning. I feel like my car is going to, like, blow up. I don't know why. I don't like fire on the road. I hear you on that. So let's cut cut it cut it out i love it joey gladstone all right i love it what is your beef of the week my beef of the week is with the geico gecko whoa this sneaky motherfucker you know he comes in all smooth with his commercials and stuff like hey i'm gonna sell you auto insurance i'm like people like yeah you have to get that i'm like cool um i guess i have

to get this shit so i got geico okay and yeah i'm not gonna lie guys i got a little bit of a side swipe situation about a month ago once again ways i don't know who's programming ways probably some you know just sadistic tech fuck was like yeah take a left turn across a six lanes avenue and i'm like you're gonna i'm like this is the fastest way yeah somebody in cupertino probably anyway so i go to take a left turn and you know i make it across three lanes, and then this girl wasn't looking. She just swipes the front of my car. Pretty light, you know, but then JT was with me.

I had to have a call where they were talking about liability, like who's liable. And I'm like, well, obviously, you know, she was in the suicide lane. I'm not, you know, she was, she crossed double yellow lines, okay? And then they have this call, and these sneaky motherfuckers they're like they're like did you see her coming i'm like no i was looking for oncoming traffic to make this left turn that these nerds at ways told me to do and they got me with their they're like well since you didn't see her coming you're at fault because you didn't see her coming i'm just like geico ge, you're supposed to be my friend. And then you guys come in with your sneaky calls, you know,

trying to figure out liability, you know. Your insurance got you on liability? They got me on it. They're supposed to be getting the other person. Yeah. Whose side are they on? Yeah, yeah. Maybe that's how it actually worked out but maybe

they're trying to help me up i don't know but the guy didn't sound helpful at all he didn't sound like he was sure yeah if you're yeah if you're at fault you're the one who's gonna pay the most that call was brutal brutal i had to put my headphones in i know i was like i'm like sorry i have to look at directions during this call because like so what's going on here he did that thing that like deans do where they always repeat what you just said you're like I'm like, sorry, I have to look at directions during this call. And the guy's like, so what's going on here? He did that thing that deans do where they always repeat what you just said. You're like, yeah, so I think I exited the lane 40 feet shy of the light. He's like, OK.

So you're saying you exited the lane 40 feet shy of the light. Is that correct? Yeah. And he's like, well, if you did that when you entered the other lane, were there cars in front of you? And it's all in this tone where it's like you feel like you're going to be trapped if you say the wrong thing. Yeah. Yeah, and I'm like, well, obviously she crossed the double yellow lines

because she was going to make a left turn on Coenga. I was on the next block over. He's like, why would she go cross over to make a left turn that early i'm like dude it's like 50 feet he's like i'm looking at the map doesn't look like 50 feet so i went to the goddamn intersection i took a photo i'm like it's like it's not it's nothing what is he on google earth yeah call yeah yeah those tech those guys at ways probably fucked me over these guys got a drone over there yeah because. Because you called out Waze. Yeah, because I called out,

yeah, dude, so. I offloaded Waze. Yeah. It's still on my phone, but it's offloaded. I'm a Google Maps guy now. I'm done with it. Yeah, so maybe my beef of the week is just with insurance in general,

you know, or just high costs or just liability, you know. Why can't we all just, like, have an apple pie and watch Air Force One together, you know? Why do we all just like have an apple pie and um watch air force one together you know why do we have to figure out liability yeah i had apple pie a la mode sunday night oh dude that's awesome that's awesome um so yeah that's my beef my beef of the week is a specific

to the nfl and you know you've been hearing about it, but enough is enough. Michael Bennett gets some regular shoulder pads. I'm sick of it. The guy's got his – he's wearing, like, less than kicker's pads. He's wearing kicker's pads that a nine-year-old kicker would wear. They go barely to, like, the starting point of his clavicle. And he's got his jersey rolled up where you see his traps. Like he's literally rolled up his jersey where it looks like he's wearing a tank top.

And he's not wearing the proper attire or equipment. And it looks bad out there. It looks bad. Has he addressed it? I don't know. Not enough people are talking about it. Get in there and ask the tough questions. Why are you wearing your shoulder pads like that?

I'm sure it gives him some arm flexibility so he can move more easily. Yeah, he's just tackling guys with his regular shoulder. Yeah, I feel like you could hurt your collarbone pretty easily if it falls wrong. I'm sure it's good for hand fighting and it gives you a little quicker burst off the line. I don't think that's why he's doing it. I think he likes the way he looks and that's why he's doing it. And it doesn't look good. Tell him.

It's an aesthetic eyesore. Get it out. All right, guys. Let's do our quote of the week. Joe, you don't have one ready. I can already tell. You didn't tell me that it was in the email oh

chad are you do you have one ready my dog chad what is your quote of the week my quote of the week comes from the song hip to be square by huey lewis nice you guys don't know it hip to be square hip to b square i know the song hip to b square yeah my parents have the album fuck yeah so he goes i'm working out most every day and watching what i eat they tell me that it's good for me but i don't even care i know that it's crazy i know that it's nowhere but there's no denying that it's hip to be square. And I like the message, you know, it's like you can be cool, but and still take care of yourself.

You know, you don't have to be, you know, some like, you know, fucker on the couch, just like chilling and being like, I'm too cool for anything. You can take care of yourself you can be healthy you can eat right you can hop on that treadmill and still be the coolest dude around because guess what guys it's hip to be square you know what that's cool because i uh i never thought of the song that that's the meaning that because i grew up listening to like when i was a kid i thought it's hip to be like square the shape. Oh. That's what I thought. Yeah. Because you don't know what square is when you're little. Yeah, there's two meanings. My quote of the week is from the book Sapiens,

where the author, Yuval Noah Harari, writes this, biology enables, culture forbids. I don't know what that means exactly, but to me what it means is most of what we want to do and feels instinctive to us is actually okay. And culture tells us that it's wrong, but culture is just trying to make you feel bad about things. So you'll act in a way that's more predictable. You don't have to do that.

As long as you're communicating, you can do weird shit. Follow your dong. All right, I got one. Life is what happens when you're busy making other plans. JL, baby. Oh, yeah, that was John Lennon. Yeah, you're right. Oh, you knew that one?

Did you just look up quotes? Yes. And that's what popped up? Yeah, this was the second one. I thought it would be good. Guys, I think we did it. Yeah, we got to read ads. Let's read some ads.

Stokers, I got a big date after the podcast today my first date with this girl you guys think it's gonna go well uh dude totally yeah i think me and this girl are gonna end up dating i think you're gonna i think you're gonna have an amazing dates at 11 a.m usually work out no it's at noon oh okay but yeah i think we're gonna end up dating but you missed me last time I had a girlfriend. No, I miss her. I like her. What just happened?

That's nice. Why is my headphones on? Something's going on. Maybe it's where I moved the laptop. Yeah, it's so weird. Dude, I saw you guys meet. There's sparks. You're the one who convinced me to get her number.

Oh, yeah? Yeah, we met on the street. I just started talking to her. And then as we were walking away, I was like, man, she was cute. And the one who convinced me to get her number oh yeah yeah we met on the street i just started talking to her and then as we were walking away i was like man she was cute and then chad was like go get her number yeah sometimes you need that i was like that's my dog that coaching remember in um uh phoenix when you guys i was being a big pussy yeah and i like kept walking out you're like just go in there she had a boyfriend but i was pretty i was pretty pumped after of course just so you put yourself out there yeah well joe's got love on the horizon oh yeah yeah joe you're on two days is it here's my new quote of the week quoting joe he went on a date with this girl that they've been circling each other for a while he was staring at her she said what are you thinking yeah and joe

was thinking this i'm thinking what it would be like to date you. But he didn't say that to her. I didn't say that. What did you tell her? Nothing. I said nothing, yeah. But that's what you were thinking. Absolutely.

Dude, you fucking. Well, I don't want to put my cards out just yet. Yeah, good call. You play them close to the vest. Yeah, I mean, what am I going to show my hand already? I don't know her all that well. I'm not throwing it all out there right away i already told this girl i'm meeting today that i love her i'm playing a couple i'm playing a

couple more hands first what see you at lunch i love you see you at lunch i love you let's get a timeline set into this woman yeah you're very into her i'm excited for you it's nice to see you enamored you still have the same face like but I can sense the energy inside. Can I tell you something else I like about this person? What? She's passionate. I don't know her at all. She's Colombian.

Oh, JT. I think that's part of the reason Joe's so effective at talking to her. I've kind of gotten him used to talking to Colombian people. Oh, yeah, you're Colombian. Oh, jeez, yeah. She's going to be firing. And you're like ice, and she's like fire. Opposites attract.

A song of fire and ice. That's polarity, baby. I like that, yeah. But Joe, she's from your workplace. Okay, we're really getting into it here. Is that any sort of conflict for you? Well, yeah, that's part of of the that's one of the cons yeah that's kind of something i've been teetering with and you know wondering if it's worth maybe

feeling uncomfortable there is the juice worth the squeeze yeah what's uh what's the next date where you guys going next i don't know bowling we'll see i'd be shocked if you didn't have a 250 average at bowling dude yeah i don't i i think i suck i haven't done it what that's shocking i think my dad's a good bowler i don't know we don't i mean we don't really do it though it's uh i feel like you'd be an awesome bowler i was yeah i mean no i don't know i don't think i ever got over 200 i think i got like 150 ones i feel like we'd play a game and he'd be like yeah chicken whatever the term is is that what it is turkey turkey's three strikes in a row yeah turkey now you just sit down just sit down and you need to have a Bud Light or Bud Heavy. Are you Bud Light or Bud Heavy guy?

I like both, though. But you're more of a Coors guy. I like Coors Banquet, yeah. Oh, yeah. Dude, fuck yeah. But, yeah, I like Bud Light. I didn't know it was called Banquet. Yeah, he didn't know that.

He told me, like, he was like my big brother and I didn't know what, like, sex was. He was like, you don't know it's called course banquet yeah original course you you knew it's called the banquet right yeah obviously damn oh you hit me with the of course i don't know where you did yeah i had to do it dude dude i'm such a rook where you been man yellow can that's banquet dog dude my dirty secret is i'm not that well versed in alcohol i mean i'm well versed in being drunk but i don't uh i don't know my shit what like so like real quick like hunter gatherers i don't think they really cared about like goals and stuff

like that they just wanted to like eat sleep and like fuck you know what I mean? And hang out with their pod of people. So at some point, goals got injected into like our evolutionary psychology. Yeah. How important are goals to you? I love goals me too they keep me uh they're like my north star they keep me going yeah that's how you yeah if you don't have goals what are you living for yeah it's goals are everything but what if you were living just to live i think that's what the hunter gatherers were doing yeah they well yeah because we're yeah kind of well i guess having goals yeah it's like you if you were living just to live i think that's what the hunter-gatherers were doing yeah well yeah because we're yeah kind of well i guess having goals yeah it's like you get caught in

the rat race of life but but i can't even it's also it's also positive motivation yeah in this kind in this society that we have today you have to have goals yeah yeah i imagine yeah maybe society was changed a little bit but i just like um whenever i'm just like even on like vacation or downtime too much downtime i get like restless i'm just like yeah i'm like i i don't like this what am i working towards yeah is it but you know also is that an american thing maybe but i mean they say like but i love that i love america they say like yeah living is like eating and drinking. And I'm like, but that stuff all kind of makes you feel shitty in the end.

You know what I mean? Yeah. Yeah. Like, oh, you eat. You just eat and you just drink wine all the time. Yeah, then you're going to feel like dog shit for the rest of the next day. Yeah, it's not... But do you feel like dog shit because of the

physical aspects or do you feel like dog shit because you're like i'm not getting closer to my goals i think well one the physical and then if you have goals then that compounds it yeah joe thank you for doing the pod today yeah thank you for coming out yeah it was a late replacement a lot of fun you're you're a super sub glad i could come out of the pen and uh strike some guys out you're always dependable yeah you're the best i love you joe i love you thanks love you guys thank you guys that's episode 45 for going deep challenge at uh thank you jo for coming in, for being a beast, and gracing us with your hog. Sorry to keep talking about your hog.

Thank you guys so much. Keep writing in. I think we're going to do a call-in episode. All call-in. All call-in episode. That's what's happening with that. Check out the Patreon. Patreon.com slash ChadGoesDeep. Think about those calls. Make them succinct when you call in so we can keep this thing moving.

Yeah. All right, later, Dix. Thanks, guys. If you need advice These guys are really nice You wanna know What to do Where to go

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