Going Deep with Chad and JT - Ep. 48 - Award Speeches, Building Camaraderie, Emails

Episode Date: December 12, 2018

What up stokers, in episode 48 we dive deep into the best award speeches of all time, how to build camaraderie without hazing, and take some time to describe our days. It's dank. Check it out. Boom clap. For bonus content, check out our patreon: www.patreon.com/chadgoesdeep

what's up guys this is chad kroger coming in with the going deep with chad jt podcast this is episode 48 something and i'm here with my compadre jean thomas what up what up dude boom clap stokers how you doing i'm doing well man i've been having a good day. Yeah. Good weekend. What'd you do today? I'm almost embarrassed to say because it's so low stakes and it'll really make people think less of my hardships. But I woke up pretty early, did some going deep stuff. Then I went to therapy, unloaded some shit to Dr. Penn, same therapist as Pete Holmes. Nice. And then I went to the gym and I boxed with our dear friend, Four Trees. Bob.

And then I did a podcast prep and now here I am. Sweet. Yeah. How was your day? Solid. I woke up. solid i uh woke up um i went surfing then i decided to become a metalhead so i started just diving into that world and got real dark and dirty and in touch with the devil and i like feel like a edgier guy now i'm stoked on that and now i'm rocking like some pretty heavy gear and I'm really stoked on that. And then I did some podcast prep, edited some videos, did some videos and then fired off some emails. Yeah, I was CC'd on some of those. You've sent some really solid emails today. Oh, thanks dude.

I like emailing. You're really good at it. It's one of my, I enjoy tasks like that. Yeah. It makes me feel good when you fire it off. You're like, all right. You got a good logistical mind. Oh, thanks.

How would you say I am at emailing? You're good at writing. Oh, dude, thanks. But I'd say subpar, no pun intended, at checking. There's just a deluge of messages that come in, and it's hard for me to sift through which ones matter. Yeah, I've never understood. You're one of those dudes.

Caroline, same way. You look at their phone. It's like 100 messages, 10,000 emails, 69 voicemails. And you're like, you don't want to check any of those? I don't get it. Well, I guess I figure if there's an important one, they'll follow up. Please, please call back please once i get the please call back i'm like all right something's going on here john thomas john thomas please call me back it's your mother but you know when i do call her back

she goes i have to tell you something and it's very important and i want you to know this and i'm like what's coming she goes i love you and i'm like all right got it yeah very nice to hear though good call dude i um yes i was my weekend was solid i saw a movie with you on saturday anniversary apocalypse fun low budge film i wasn't it was like so far from what i was expecting but i enjoyed it yeah me too it had so many different genres and stuff going on it was tough for me to like even place it but i enjoyed it yeah and then i saw the movie roma by alfonso cuaron that night yeah dude masterpiece one of the best movies i've ever seen intimate but still had like scope and really put you in like a specific place and time and it was really cool and uh one of my buddies

though was laughing during the entire movie even during serious parts was it supposed to be funny at all no i mean it was funny at points yeah it had some humor in it but he was laughing at not funny parts and i got a little bit uh grand posh about it i was like please stop laughing did he explain like this is why i'm laughing he said i can't help it and he's like if it's funny i'm gonna laugh well at least he this is a bomb am i correct yeah at least he knows this is A-bomb, am I correct? Yeah. At least he knows his sense of humor. That's true. And he's like, oh, I think that shit's funny. Yeah.

He's not looking for approval from people. Right. Where people start laughing and say, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Yeah, it wasn't one of those. I did that laugh. I was with a girl at a comedy show on Friday, and she was my date. Yeah. And like if we didn't talk for a couple minutes, I'd laugh extra at a joke. I'd go, ha, ha, ha she was my date. Yeah. And, like, if we didn't talk for a couple minutes,

I'd laugh extra at a joke. I'd go, ha! Yeah. Or if you even go on a date to a comedy show, and, like, they make jokes, and you're like, ha, ha, ha. Yeah, you laugh like a different person. I'm just a cheerful guy. Yeah, I'm fun.

This guy's hilarious. Harmless but exciting. That's what I'm always going for. Like, on the date, you're like, man, that guy was so funny. And then you see your dogs, and you're like, how was it? You're like, he's hot trash. Yeah. Changed the story. Yeah.

Dude, I went back to that same venue to get my credit card back because I had left it there. Yeah. And there was a big party going on and I recognized a lot of the people at the party. Yeah. And they were friends with my ex. Oh. Yeah.

And then I was like, okay, but whatever. I'm going to get my credit card. And as I was waiting to get my credit card, I saw her on the other side of the bar. When was this? On Sunday night, last night. Oh, shit. Walked by. Biggest smile I've ever seen on her face.

Then she darted into the bathroom, and I ran out of the place without getting my credit card. She didn't say hi? She didn't see me. I saw her, but she didn't see me. Oh. Yeah. It was very poetic or something. credit card she didn't say hi she didn't see me i saw her but she didn't see me oh yeah it's very uh poetic or something i thought she like looked at you and like smiled and went to the bathroom no

no she smiled like obliviously she was in her own world yeah that's juicy stuff yeah and then i looked and i went and i ran out what were your feelings at that time they i don't know what they were but they were a lot was it fear a little bit yeah also just like more just overwhelmed like oh man she still has a hold on me she'll always have a hold on me yeah and i mean i wish her the best you know i was a little frustrated with how happy she looked but for the most part i wish her the best and uh you'd rather she's like crying no no that's true that's true that's good yeah i'm like, okay, good. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Just checking. Yeah, just checking to make sure I'm doing all right.

Coming out ahead. I want you to be happy, just not quite as happy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's cool. Yeah, it was intense. What did I do last night? Yeah, I hung out with you and the Farnster. Oh, yeah, that was really fun.

Yeah. He was blowing my mind with youtube videos was he yeah he's a good youtube curator dude yeah he's on top of everything if like if like there's like some obscure person he's like he's like oh i know what that is that's uh and you're like goddamn he's like yeah i've been i've been monitoring all the videos and you're like what he's a talented guy he's the oracle he is the oracle yeah he's super talented you know it reminds me of the the guy in x-men uh who like types everyone into like the the the matrix when that wait an x-man tank is it tank tank yeah his brother dozer yeah uh tank

and he's like all right let's start with kung fu yeah or jujitsu yeah yeah i know jujitsu or i know kung fu oh i think he likes it yeah unfortunately tank has an untimely demise rest in peace poor tank you were a beast you were a tank um we got some fun topics this week. Yeah. What do we got? First up, I thought this was really uplifting. School officials determined that high school football players caught running nude with an Oreo between their ass cheeks were not hazed. Good. They weren't forced to do this. These guys volunteered for it out of, you know,

respect for legacy and in an attempt to build camaraderie. And I think that's really beautiful. I love it. And I guess they took it from Blue Mountain State. And in the show Blue Mountain State, if you lost the Oreo run, you had to eat the Oreo. But I guess none of these kids ate the Oreos. I think it said it wasn't determined whether or not they ate them yeah i like to think that one kid a leader ate his oreo yeah just to set the tempo if you're gonna do an oreo run i think you got to go all

in i'm with you yeah i'd eat it i know you would thanks but they But they had to analyze the footage to determine whether there was hazing. So I'd really love to be a fly on that wall. Not so I could see the teenage peckers, but just so I could see these professionals analyzing footage to see what it was like when these kids were running with Oreos between their butts. 30 interviews analyzing video footage. They really went in-depth. It's a hefty investigation.

Yeah. What are your thoughts on the authorities cracking down on this? Do you think they're kind of anti-fun and games and bonding? I do. But I also understand that's part of their gig, so they have to do it. But I'm confident that the young kids will find another outlet for their camaraderie building yeah i'd like to

meet them i think it's a creative young group of gentlemen um i mean although they did take it from blue mountain state but i think it's a you know props to them for going there yeah you know as opposed to just like your typical ice breakers or like zip zaps op have you ever been hazed yeah you like it though right yeah it's like hanging out with my older brothers you know it it's it creates a kind of warmth inside me yeah you're able to interpret it as affection yeah i think that's kind of the best kind of affection i know i would always like haze myself and then get too much attention for it and then be like fuck this i'm out like no everyone's like dude no one made you stick your head in the toilet like you did it to yourself i

was like yeah it wasn't what i thought it was gonna be yeah dude you didn't have to flash dong in front of the entire school yeah like no one forced you to wear a g-string to school you decided to do that and now you're mad that people are making a big deal of it i'm like well got different yeah Yeah, no. With my brother, like my oldest brother, when I was a kid, I would be like, he'd come home from college and stuff. I'd be like, please, just kick my ass. Like, just kick my ass, dude.

Like, let's get after it, you know? And he'd like throw me in the pool, beat my ass. And not like fully beat my ass, just sort of like throw me in the pool. Yeah, more wrestling than punching. Yeah, it just is kind of a primal thing. And it's one of my greatest childhood memories, you know. And then, you know, he got a job and I'm like, can you kick my ass? He's like, I have a job now.

And I'm like, fuck, you know. Right. But what about your duty? Yeah. To beat this booty. Yeah. Yep. Yeah, I still wrestle my younger brother and he's a good sport about it he lets me he knows well you know what and i've also gotten better at wrestling him because i used to wrestle him and go too far yeah but ow you really fucking

hurt me yeah get off me dumbass and i'd be like i'm a moron yeah i wanted to show him that i was strong and in that process i ruined fun for both of us but now i wrestle him the right amount we're like we don't ever go to the ground i just like i'm like oh we could have gone to the ground but we're gonna stay upright yeah and then there's like a it builds the bond because he knows that he's safe with me and that i'm not gonna push it too hard that's cool my brother mark he uh he's so strong that he kind of like, he'll like get on top of me or something or like push me down. And he's just, there's so much strength. I'm like, Jesus Christ. And he just, he's one of those guys that doesn't know how strong he is. Dude, you know, I went, I was always small. And then at some point I got strong. And my dad and I got into a fist fight.

Because I was using his credit card for porn. And he wanted me to cancel it in front of him. And I told him I'd cancel it later. But I'd also just met his girlfriend that he left my mom for that weekend. So I was pretty pissed off. I didn't feel like doing something for him. So I ended up roughing him up a bit. We got into a fight and doing something for him. So I ended up roughing him up a bit. We got into a fight, and I chucked him.

And then my brother pulled me off and slammed me backwards. And I went, huh? And I looked at my brother, and I started walking towards him, and he went, dude! And I went, oh, sorry. And I snapped out of it. You're sort of like a gorilla stance. Yeah.

I was like, huh? And I started walking towards him, and he just looked at me, and he went, dude! And I was like, okay. What was your walking towards him, and he just looked at me, and he went, dude. And I was like, okay. What was your brother doing? He was just watching the fight? He was like, we were arguing, and I was like crying. And then once it got to the physical realm, he broke it up right away.

Yeah. There was no like blows thrown or anything. Oh, he didn't land one? No, no. He said I chipped his tooth. Yeah. And I said, you're lucky I didn't knock out all your teeth. And then my dad quickly said, the only reason you can do that is because I pay for your gym membership.

That's a good one. That's a good burn. Dude, my brother and I, this was kind of a painful memory for me because I really kind of fucked him up. I think I was in first grade. He must have been in third grade. It was around the holiday season everyone was everyone was around you know i have like four other siblings older siblings uh and so we were all kind of roughhousing and to my brother he was kind of giving me an attitude so i went double

fist hammered down on his balls and uh he was out down and out for the count for like an hour did you feel bad afterwards i think so i can't remember i think so but he was like crying so yeah i must have felt bad but i think i was so amped up with adrenaline because like my older brother bill and my cousin evan were there and i was like trying to impress them and i was like but they all we all came to the agreement that was a cheap shot. Right. So I couldn't be that proud of it. Yeah, when the older kids kind of decide whether what you did was okay or not, that's kind of it.

We called it the Intergalactic Crotch Wars. Oh, that's a good name. Yeah. And you came from the cosmos on his nuts. Yeah, Mark, I'm sorry for hitting your nuts. I know you're listening, and I love you. And I know your nuts are doing well now. Hope your nuts are good, dude.

I remember one time you whipped me in the ass with a belt before school. And then I got him in the ass. So we both just had big red marks across each other's asses. Oh, that's nice. It's not really a good story. It is. It is. You guys walking around with the same kind of smirk on your butts?

Yeah, it was like eye for eye except welt for welt on ass. Cheek for cheek. Yeah, cheek for cheek. Chad and I also this week, we looked at all the best Oscar acceptance speeches. Did you have a personal fave? I had to go with Ben and matt that was your favorite yeah because the the the amp and the the there it was so genuine and they were just so pumped and there was no uh it wasn't pretentious at all they were just so excited and it was just like two dudes who

like came up together and they were just so excited to like have reached that pinnacle status and it and it the excitement grew at first they were scared and then they're like the moment sank in they were just like yeah yeah yeah and the oscar goes to jack land and every oscar TV at full screen. I have to say, on all the speeches, it seemed like in the 90s people were very more loving of one another. People were what?

Way more loving of one another. Right. It was sort of like they were like, I love you, and I love you, and I love you, and now everyone goes up and makes a political statement. Right. More serious now. You know, we're just really two young guys who were fortunate enough to be involved

with a lot of great people whom it's coming upon us to, there's no way we're doing this in less than 20 seconds, upon whom it's incumbent of us to thank. Look how stoked Matt is. Damon looks kind of lost. Yeah. Like he looks like, I don't know if his tux fits him right. And he looks like he kind of just woke up.

Art Weisling, who believed in us and made this movie. Gus Van Sant for brilliant direction. Robin Williams, who delivered to Streetlights. Minnie Driver, who performed to a brilliant Stellan Skarsgård, who was great. Your brother. My brother Casey, who's brilliant in the movie. Cole Hauser. Cole Hauser, my mother.

And Matt's mother, the most beautiful women here. My dad right over there. Jack said hi to you. Who else? John Gordon from Miramax. Chris Moore produced the movie. Chris Moore. Patrick Weitzel, the best agent in Hollywood.

Yeah, Patrick Weitzel. And Cuba Gooding for showing us how to give our acceptance speech. And all our friends and family. And everybody back in Boston watching us tonight. And thank you so much to the city of Boston. And God, I know we're forgetting somebody. Whoever we forgot, we love you and we thank you. Thank you so much.

Look at that. The pump from Matt afterwards. Yeah. Whoever we forgot, we thank you. It is sweet. Yeah. What pump from Matt afterwards? Yeah. Whoever forgot, forgot, but thank you. It is sweet. Yeah. What was your favorite? I think my favorite, and I think I've mentioned it on the pod before, is the Ving Rhames one.

Oh, yeah. That was a good one. From when he wins the Golden Globe. I'll pull that one up real quick. Because what I like about this one is I love how strong Ving Rhames is, and then I love how much he's crying. Yeah. You don't see a lot of this. So he wins for playing Don King.

All right, I'm going to pee real quick. What up, guys? It's me, Chad, right now, just solo rocking this mic. Guys, I just wanted to take a moment to recognize all the wood in this studio. I freaking love wood. And this is a wood. I feel like I'm in a cabin right now. And yeah, guys, get more wood in your life because I think it's really uplifting.

Yeah, so just shout out to wood. I'm not a wood expert per se, but I would have to go ahead and guess that this is mahogany. Yep. Brought my shades in here. You know, I don't really have much against people who wear shades at night. You know, if you want to wear shades at night, do it. I think it's a cool look, you know. I think it's bold.

If you're going to be a douche while doing it cool keep uh but you just know that you're still you're uh solidifying that rep that people who wear shades indoors are douches you know so stokers if you want to wear shades indoors maybe try doing it and be like the nicest guy in the room and see if you can change it around. As we always do, Chad, before we get into the cues, got that green drink for you. Are we going to do the cues first? Yeah.

Up first, we've got Fred. Puzio is a bitch and jt should totally beat his ass once again because fuck puzio love the pod christian and freddy is that the question yep thank you for confirming that puzio is in fact a bitch you guys are so nice dude i appreciate the backup uh puzio if you're out there listening they said it not me but if you have a problem with them you got a problem with me all right next q alia what up chad and jt i recently got prescribed some anti-anxiety antidepressant drugs and i keep thinking that if people find out they will think different of me how do i let people know that this is something i take but that doesn't make me any different as a person? Thanks, guys, and fuck Puzio.

I'm sorry. I was focused on the green juice. No worries, dude. Of course. So a stoker was prescribed anti-anxiety medication, and they're worried that if people find out, they'll think differently of them. So they want to know how to handle it going forward

so that it doesn't define them. Define them? Yeah. I don't think you have anything to worry about yeah i really don't i think the stigmas we put on ourselves are often the harshest ones i mean the way that i handle it is i just tell people up top and uh like my therapist and my brother say i lead too largely with it like i give it too big of a seat at the table, but that's always just been easiest for me. Cause I really don't feel like I've been any different since I started taking them, except I sleep better now. Yeah. And I've been a little bit less crazy. So it's been a, and here's the thing. I think if you take medication to make yourself healthier,

that's something you should be proud of. So don't have any shame about it. You know, you're on the cutting edge of taking care of yourself. That's a good thing. Yeah. It's a very common thing. And I don't have any shame about it. You're on the cutting edge of taking care of yourself. That's a good thing. Yeah, it's a very common thing. And I don't think, if someone thinks poorly upon you for it or differently, then it's something on them. Yeah.

Probably something wrong with them. And I encourage you to listen to an episode of The School of Greatness with Charlemagne Tha God. He talks about his struggles with anxiety. And I'm like, damn, Charlemagne the God has struggles with anxiety? Then I'm going to be okay. Yeah. And good for you, Stoker, for, you know, taking the bull by the horns and dealing with what you got.

All right. Next up, Fred. Yo, what up, fellas? A few nights a week, my roommate will get rowdy late at night, which prevents me from from falling asleep i have a busy schedule and need my daily uninterrupted slumber i have asked him to keep it quiet while during weeknights so we could get extra rowdy during weekends how should i get my roommate to keep it down during the week so we could rage hard on the weekend thanks for your help huge fan of the pod freddie he's making a lot of noise yeah the dude's just partying during the weekdays and not

being like considerate of his roommates who are trying to just get a good night's rest maybe designate like a loud zone i was thinking the same thing yeah be like we know because you can't really stop him from doing what he wants to do but you could be like here here's the boundary you know yeah there's parameters to it when you want to party you go to like the front lawn yeah and you wear headphones yeah and then like how do you enforce that if he doesn't listen like if he's a real asshole and he's not gonna listen how do you make sure he listens i think that's when you resort to violence i'm just kidding i think violence could work i think you just got to tell him, hey, dude, when you party like that, you look like an idiot. Oh, shame him?

A little bit, yeah. Nice. I dig that. Like, I know you're having a lot of fun, but if I can be honest with you, the rest of us kind of think you're an idiot right now. And then he'll act like that doesn't hurt him. But if you tell him that, you know, a couple of weeks in a row, everything gets to everybody at some point. And if you're sincere about it.

Yeah. If you're, if you're not angry, you're calm, cool, collected. You just come out in your PJs and you're like, you're a grade a asshole.

And everyone here thinks it, he's not going to want to party after that. No. Strider used to do that to me. Brilliantly. Like one time I was being a douche and I like locked Strider out of the car and he went to unlock it and like it was clicked and i was like sitting there smiling at him and he was just like unlock the door moron and i was like um yeah that's that's a lot simpler i was thinking you get like cones and you designate a space dude i was literally i was like can you get a soundproof like kind of like enclosure or get like the heineken dome from

coachella and be like look we got the heineken dome for you it's a headphone party it's there for you i like where we're at though because we don't want them to stop partying we just want them to do it in a way that's contained and then it becomes kind of fun it's like he brings people back so this is my domicile. It's where I party, dude. Yeah, my roommates built this for me. I just rage in here. Have you been in the Heineken Dome?

No. Oh, you haven't? No. Oh, it's amazing. What is it? You just put on headphones. So like everyone's listening to the same track. So it's silent in there.

Oh, at Coachella? Yeah. Yes, I have done that. I have done that. My bad. You're just looking at your boys. You're just like. But it's all just in your head. It's all in your mouth. But you trust that. I have done that. My bad. You're just looking at your boys. You're just like. But it's all just in your head.

It's all in your nuts. But you trust that everybody hears the same thing. Yeah, it's all in your dome. Bro relationship advice. Grant. Yo, what's good? Chad and JT. Love you guys. I've been a fan since day one.

I go to Penn State, so shout out to Happy Valley. So I'm dating this girl that I've only been dating for a few months. She's great and all of my friends and family love her. She is so nice and selfless and pretty and smart and all of that good stuff. But for some reason I am not in love with her. I do love her and the person that she is, but I'm not in love with her. I can't see myself marrying her. And I know that is what she wants because she has told me about it. I am only 20 years old and I'm not saying I'm not open to the idea, but she's not the right one. She is great and deserves to be with someone who loves her.

Like she loves me. And I don't want to waste my time and her time with a relationship that i can't see working out in the end so how do i go about ending things with her in the best possible way i'd like to maintain a friendship with her because she's become one of my best friends but i feel like this will break her and make her hate me any advice would be great you guys seems to have a pretty um clear understanding of what's going on yeah at first i thought he was gonna ask what should i do i'm like i think he just laid it out right in terms of how to go about doing it that's tough he knows he knows why though but is that too hurtful the honesty i mean i don't think he needs to tell her like full stop that you know he just

doesn't reciprocate as deeply as she does but i think he can tell her that it's just not what he wants and you know the straightforward approach is always best let her know you care about her let her know you want to be friends i think the harder part is actually after you have that talk um letting them hate you for a little bit because that's kind of normal. You can't rush into being friends again with someone after you break up. So you kind of have to let them be angry at you because they liked you so much so they're hurt. And it's hard to swallow,

especially if you think of yourself as a good dude, but that's just the way it goes. Yeah. If you're trying to preserve the friendship too, drawing it out too is probably the worst thing you can do so yeah uh i think you're making a smart move by if that's how you feel then ending it but it's tough to say the right way to go about it but just sit her down and tell her let her down easy yeah be honest but not too honest yeah yeah be like judicious and what you're honest about yeah emma what do you think

thank you thank you all right cool squashing some beef benjamin sup my dudes ben and george here and we just have a quick question about squashing some serious beef. The beef does not belong to us, but a friend of ours. We used to go to her place a lot last year for pregames and such, but this year she has been Arby's beefing with her new roommates. The one time we were at her place this year, we happened to have donuts on us

and offered them to her roommates, but they rejected our token of goodwill. Our question is, should we help try to squash this? None of them seem inclined to squashing it anytime soon and we don't like seeing our friend

uncomfortable in her own living space. Thank you for the wisdom in advance. You gotta stay out of it, dog. That's a hornet's nest that you don't want to get involved in.

Give her a good place to go when she comes to your place and hear her out when she complains. But I wouldn't mess with someone on their home turf you know they want to squash the beef for her yeah yeah what are you gonna do it's like it's like the yeah like what are you what are the options yeah can we problem solve our way to a solution

what are the options yeah can we problem solve our way to a solution can i read it maybe having a great rager at your place where you invite all of them and then they have such a good time that they have no choice but to uh kind of want to kick it with you guys i mean i just feel like this is energy that would be better served going towards things that are more for you and easier to accomplish yeah it's like who are you clint eastwood and gran torino you haven't seen that movie no but i think i understand what you mean yeah he's got to beat up a gang yeah it's like we're gonna go over there with scare the shit out of yeah i just don't know what you can do. I like what you're saying, give her sanctuary. And it's kind of on her. If she's beefing with her roommates, she's got to bounce.

Right. Moving together next year. Yeah. It's nice that they care so much, though. Yeah. But... Maybe just keep bringing, offering peace gifts. gifts you know pastries yeah i mean it's the holidays maybe be like the three kings and like bring some gold and some myrrh and whatever

the other thing is silk yeah bring some silk just sort of be festive that's what i'm getting at never bad advice yeah logan hey dogs long time listener here so i don't go to many concerts but the few i have been to i felt super out of place like obviously i like the artist i'm trying to sing along and dance a little bit with the girlfriend but for some reason i can't do it last concert i went to the guy in front of me was going hard as fuck dude was singing and jumping and around and just overall killing it how do i be that guy how do i get myself to just let go and jam the way i want to thanks boys fuck puzio and stay stoked concerts are tough i don't connect to concerts dude just start moving yeah momentum builds on momentum yes

so if if you the more you think about the more the less you're gonna do like i remember at my brother's wedding my dad who like doesn't dance at all he's he was grooving you know he looked like herb lesson out there just shaking it and i'm like what the fuck dad and he's like he gave me this look he's like you will get on this dance floor right now and i was like goddamn so i did and i just had to move um so the more you move the more you'll keep moving, the more fun you'll have. I'd say try not to think about it.

Just keep moving. That's my advice. I think Chad's absolutely right. How do you get to be that guy? One step at a time. One dance move at a time. Just build. What's up, dogs?

First off, I got to say the pod is epic. Y'all are amazing bros, spreading nothing but sheer wisdom and love to bros worldwide. The world is... Thank you, dude. Anywho, I'm writing in because I have a sticky situation that i think you guys could help with i've been dating this woman for a couple months now and everything is great we both like the music scene so we're always at shows and stuff which leads to my problem my all-time favorite

brand bronco worldwide is playing a show on valentine's day when i found out this news i immediately sent it to my girlfriend thinking that her stoke would be just as full as mine sadly as it was not She doesn't want to go to the Bronco show Which surprised me, considering that we were always Going to concerts together, and also that Bronco fucking slaps Give them a listen if you have a chance She says it's because she doesn't listen to him

So my question is this How do I drag my girlfriend to Bronco, or is it simply not the move? Thank you dogs for the stoke elevation Isaac Could you possibly go with a bunch of your dogs? But not on Valentine's Day. Oh, it's on Valentine's Day? Yeah.

It's tough. I mean, I think he's just gotta go see him another time. Yeah. He's gotta compromise on that day. I haven't been great at Valentine's Day in my history,

but you still gotta try. You gotta go to something they like. I one time saw like a Sylvester Stallone movie. I think it was like Bullet in the Head on Valentine's Day,

which is a couple of my boys. You know, we were all single. And then I saw a guy come in with his girlfriend and I felt so bad for her. Dear Chad and JT, I wanted to get some advice on a situation in my life. You guys always give me confidence and positivity to keep me going,

remain stoked through rough times. Recently there has been a lot of negativity in my life. I'm 20 years old in community college in a small town. So good times and good people are hard to come by. I have my best friend who is super gnarly and we're moving to Hawaii next year. One of the bros we grew up with has recently been reaching out to hang out with us lately. Every time we we chill i get super negative vibes constantly

judging and undermining every idea that comes out of my mouth i continue to hang with them thinking it will be different but every time i leave feeling like utter shit and my stoke tank is drained the question is do i completely cut off this person and go into straight grind mode the whole winter or is there a way to stand up and hold my ground keep in mind he is a childhood friend you guys are the best thank you, could you leave my name anonymous? Thanks, bro gods. One of his friends is being a douche, and anytime he says anything, he's like,

take an exception with it. I fucking hate when people are doing that. It's the worst. Because you could literally take exception with everything anyone's ever said yeah i mean like if you had a beef with like mlk or lincoln you could take you could take exception to something they said during one of their great speeches you'd be like oh actually the thing you said there is kind of not right because if you really think about it's actually more like this yeah and they'd be like all right well i'm kind of killing it though yeah Yeah. I mean, I get that he's a childhood friend,

but if he makes you feel like shit, then what's the point? I'm with you, too, man. It sounds like this guy's just, like, miserable, and people like that don't mean to, but he's going to make you miserable. And you sound like you got energy to feel good. So, you know, use that and put it in situations and environments where it's going to blossom, not be beaten down. Yeah.

Yeah, I would be on the hunt for a better class of person to kick it with. Yeah. Sorry, buddy. Girl that dumped me listens to the podcast going for a romantic gesture here. Hey, Chad. Hey,

JT. I'm in dire need of your help. My stoke meter is on an all time low. I've been seeing this absolute dime for the past couple of months. Everything was going great. She's far and away the most amazing girl I've ever dated. And she's told me the same about myself recently. She told me she was feeling like we needed to have a talk.

We've been pretty good about being honest and open with each other since day one, so this wasn't anything out of the blue. She voiced some concerns she was having, and we talked it out, and it ended in us kissing and making out. Or making up, rather. Sorry. I'm horny. Stoked. Cut to a half hour

later when she texts me telling me things are over between us. I was completely caught off guard. I've never been so crushed at a relationship ending. I know she still has these feelings for me, but she can Stoked. Any help is appreciated. with her do i go the romantic route and lay it all on the line until i'm completely in love with her knowing she listens to the podcast and hope she will hear this and i'll win her back any help is appreciated so um they broke up they made out and made up and then when she left she broke up with him again and he's he's convinced that she still um wants to be with him, but that she's just too mixed up to see that clearly. I mean, I love the idea of the huge romantic gesture, but I think you gotta give her space. I love it too. I love where his head's at.

I love that he rode in, hoping that she would hear this. I love that he's taking big swings. Yeah. But I think you gotta find a new pitcher. new pitcher to take swings on. Yeah. I think probably in her dome right now, she's all like trying to figure things out.

So if you keep coming in and keep coming in, she isn't going to have time to like figure out what she really wants. So I think the best option you have is to give her space, let her figure it out, maybe miss you a little bit. And then she'll be like, hey, maybe I did want to date whatever his name is. And if he tries to be a guide for her through her own head, he's just going to get lost in there as well and lose sight of who he is. Yeah.

So I think all this great instincts he has need to be put towards something that's going to reciprocate in a more healthy way. But we got to acknowledge that this is like a real living Jerry Maguire. Like, what up, dude? I'm hoping it works. Yeah, fuck yeah, dude.

But yeah, dude, I think give her some space and then, you know, because, you know, you can't convince someone to feel a certain way. They got to make the decision on their own. Give her some space. And then, you know, because, you know, I mean, you know, you can't convince someone to feel a certain way. They got to make the decision on their own. So, but I would just watch some Tom Cruise movies, get your confidence back, do some crunches, and just be a beast.

Yeah. Be a beast. I love it. All right, dudes. Thanks for writing in this week. That. Be a beast. I love it. All right, dudes. Thanks for writing in this week. That was some good stuff. Now let's get into our next phase.

Chad, who is your babe of the week? My babe of the week is the Flying Dutchman order at In-N-Out. Stokers, if you didn't gather from the last pod the flying dutchman order is when you go to in and out you say let me get a flying dutchman i usually order like three um just saying um so it's uh two patties with cheese two slices of cheese in between it is so good and that's all it is so you eat like the two patties like a freaking sandwich so there's no bread nothing just meat and cheese and my brother and i we went to new orleans and we drove to new orleans 18 hour drive no we drove from new orleans to santa fe 18 hour drive we got i want to say like 20 flying dutchman

for the trip that's all we needed we just were i opened the box it looked like a box of donuts except with meat so it had that same aesthetic so i'm like wow we're eating donuts right now but it's protein i'm getting jacked it's cheese i'm feeling good shout out to sean baker what up um so yeah and thank you in and out for uh just providing such an amazing option i mean it's just incredible that you guys have that on the menu and uh of course you guys kill it at the i've heard from my brother that whataburger has a good flying dutchman kind of thing so i've never been to whataburger but i always hear about it um but uh the flying dutchman i mean you just look at the two patties together with cheese and it just looks like a freaking babe and And I got to give it the Babe of the Week status, so shout out.

Who's your babe? Stay jacked, dog. My Babe of the Week is Jalen Hurts, the backup quarterback at Alabama. Now, he was the starter for the first two years of his career, went to one or two national championship games, was the SEC Player of the Year, was a very distinguished quarterback. But then in the national championship last year against Georgia, he was benched at halftime

because he wasn't playing great. Got replaced by Tua Tavalayo-Lago, I'm so sorry, but who went on to win the game and took his job the next season. But Jalen did not transfer. He stayed at Alabama. And I was actually kind of upset about it

because I wanted him to maximize his career and be able to play somewhere else and, you know, be a starting quarterback like I think he's good enough to do. But he stuck it out at Alabama and he never complained. And he was always pretty stoic and positive on the sidelines. And then this year in the SEC championship game, Alabama's playing Georgia. The starting quarterback, Tua, gets hurt. They're down by 13.

He comes in. Incredible narrative symmetry. And I'm like, please, Jalen, win this game. And sure enough, this fucking dude leads them on a couple of touchdown drives, slings the ball better than I've seen him do it, which was always kind of his weakness, and leads them to victory. Jalen, you're a stud, dude.

You're a babe. I'm proud of you. I'm happy for you. And you know what? Honestly, I hope you start in the natty somehow. I don't want Tua to be hurt, but I just want you to be the starter. And you'll do the impossible. You'll make me root for Alabama.

I'll root for the dark side. I'll be rooting for Vader. Because in this story, Vader got replaced by another Vader, and you had to see him sit there and pout while the new Vader was lightsabering people. And he was like, I wish I had my lightsaber. And then in the third act, he does get his lightsaber back. And then you're like, you know what, Vader?

Kill the rebels. I dig it. Who is your legend of the week? Dude, it's a funny thing you're talking about Darth Vader because my Legend of the Week is Hayden Christensen's hair in Revenge of the Sith, the third Star Wars of the new one with George Lucas. Yeah, I guess, what would you call them?

The middle? Yeah, the... The one where he turns into Darth Vader. Yeah. So Hayden Christensen... I call them the episodes i guess yeah hayden christensen if you don't know he plays anakin skywalker who eventually turns into darth vader and i just want to give a shout out to his flow and the third one because it was just

all time it was epic dude it was epic you know you watch that and i the lightsaber the sound the everything about the movie was just the special effects was amazing but the most amazing thing was that flow you know i was like damn he really grew into himself he looks like a master jedi now because he mastered his flow you know and um i mean he beats ewan mcgregor yoda i don't even know what's going on on his dome it's green um Samuel L. Jackson no hair so I think it's safe to say that he had the best flow out of all the Jedis um so and uh it inspired me inspired my hairstyle you know when I saw it when I saw it as a however old I was you know like 12 or something when I saw that flow I was like that's what I'm gonna look like in my 20s that's what my flow will be like

and on top of that i think his flow made his demise in the movie all the more tragic because it all burned off you know so i don't know what i was more upset about the death of his wife or the death of his flow i appreciate your vulnerability picking the hair over the the wife amidala and they say a sith only deals in absolutes but i'm gonna absolutely agree with you his hair being dead was fucking hard on me when he watched it burn i don't think i could acknowledge it out loud because i was embarrassed but you're right that's what caused obi-wan to like look away because he's like watching him burn then he just goes oh that's when the hair caught on fire my legend of the week is ilia ilia is my landlord ilia is always at the building i mean he's he says he manages a bunch of

buildings i don't know how he does it because he's always at my building and you know when i first met him i was like this guy's destined to be a B for the week. Because he picks up the checks on the first of the month. And if you don't have it on the first, he makes you pay a late fee, even though it's like customary in America that you have till the third. He doesn't play by those rules. He wants it on the first. And if it's not in there by noon, he's knocking on your door and he's like, JT, your roommate, Greg, where's his check? Every month, why do I have to do this?

Why do I have to come here to ask for the check? Please, please, JT, your roommate, Greg, where's his check? Every month, why do I have to do this? Why do I have to come here to ask for the check? Please, please, JT, please, please. And at first it annoyed me, but now I've spent so much time with the guy, I just fucking think he's awesome. Like he's just always there and he's always fixing stuff. And if I tell him there's a problem with the apartment,

I'm like, Ilya, like my AC is busted. He's like, I'll come by in an hour. I fix it. And he does. And I swear he'd fix it even if I wasn't paying him. He does it for love of the game. The guy just likes to fix stuff. He's very boundaryless.

He'll just walk into your apartment. Like one time he just walked in without me letting him in. And I said, Ilya, you can't walk in without me letting you in. I was like, go outside. He's like, really? And I was like, please. And he's like, okay. He played along. He let me do it to him. And people who are boundaryless, but are at least aware enough about their boundarylessness to like accommodate other people when they get called out for it, they're cool. And so Ilya, you're honest to God, the best landlord I've had And, you know, you're a quirky dude, but your quirks are what make you lovable.

So you're my legend of the week. I love it. All right, dude, who is your beef of the week? My beef of the week is the death of Blockbuster. I love Blockbuster. I would go as a kid. I would always see Braveheart in the aisles. There's something about, you know, it's such a momentous moment of joyousness and all kinds of isnesses um because you it was just a place you'd go we could be like all right what's our entertainment

gonna be for the night movie what are we gonna watch i don't know let's look at the selections now you know i don't want to hate on like the you know all the streaming services but i'm gonna hate on them a little bit you know because the same when you can just hold a dvd in your hands or a video game in your hands where you're like i'm gonna rent this and i'm gonna watch this shit there's just something so much more satisfying about it except when it's opposed to when you just click on a movie and you're like all right now we're gonna watch braveheart but when you go to a blockbuster and you pick out braveheart and then you watch braveheart and then you return it that's like i destroyed that movie in the best way possible blockbuster i just want to say i miss

you dudes um shout out to randy uh the manager of the blockbuster i would go to he's a beast kind of he would hit on my mom a little bit so that was kind of weird but um other than that dude like you had great movie taste you know you always pointed out the new tom cruise movie and whatever was good and um i just missed the aisles so i do too yeah quick uh blockbuster anecdote i went there one time with strider when we were in high school to rent a movie and we went to rent a movie. And we went to rent the movie. I think it was Gross Point Blank.

And they were like, you need ID. And I was like, I don't have ID. And then Strider went, hold on. And out of his wallet, pulled out my freshman year high school ID and handed it to the guy. He found it at my place, stuck it in his wallet, held onto it for a couple years and then busted it out at that moment.

Beautiful. My beef of the week is with the triple-double. The basketball stat when you hit 10 rebounds, 10 assists, and 10 points, or you can do it in funkier ways with steals or blocks. And, you know, even some people do goofy versions with turnovers. But I'm talking about just a conventional triple-double. Now, it is a great indicator of versatility and skill, but it's diminished if you're chasing it. If you're stat chasing to get that triple double, I'm sorry. It just doesn't have the same meaning. And yes, I'm talking about Russell

Westbrook. He's breaking the triple doubles record. And I think he's a tremendous talent, but his obsession with the triple double has made me not like it as much. When I see Steven Adams blitzing away from an offensive rebound, so Russ can grab it. I'm like, am I watching genuine basketball or am I watching the exaltation of one guy above his teammates? All right,

dude, time for our quotes of the week. Do you have a quote? Not yet. All right. I have a rather long one. I'm sorry. I had to go long on this one it's all good my quote of the week is from uh the american songwriter and singer kid rock

he's got a lot of great songs but this song right here and all credit to the robey brothers for showing it to me and telling me this is the greatest pre-game ever. What's it called? Cocky by Kid Rock. Oh. I'll read you the entire first verse and the chorus. Guess who's back? I used to be broke, confused, no joke. Got used, smoked dope.

Paid dues, refused to give up quick. Now there's 10 million motherfuckers on my dick. Sold what? Say how? Say who? Sold what? Say how? Say who? Fuck what? Fuck me? Fuck you

Come clean, you know I will Drink a fifth of Jim Bean and still stand still I'm the illest fool Cooler than the water in a swimming pool Fly like a seagull Kicking like a mule More jams than a beetle from Liverpool I deliver, fool

Now who the fuck are you? I'm kid motherfucking rock from the old school got more money than matchbox 20 get more ass than mark mcgrath and then the chorus they say i'm cocky and i say what it isn't bragging motherfucker if you back it up they say i'm cocky and i say what it isn't bragging motherfucker motherfucker, if you back it up. My quote is from me, myself, and Irene, Jim Carrey. You know, there's so many good quotes in there, I'm having trouble picking the best one. I'm going to go with this one because he's being an environmentalist.

He sees, like, a baseball player flick a cigarette. He's like, hey, ringworm. And the guy looks around yeah i'm talking to you toxic waste of life you can pick up that butt do i have to glue it to the end of my shoe and stick it in your big fat pimply a-hole he's like hey man take it easy it's just a cigarette oh yeah well this is just a fist when i start throwing it around it can leave one hell of a mess amazing great shit talking hank way to be green hank hank evans being green thank you jim carrey for being green you're a beast dude i think that's it

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choose Douglas with Douglas. Real quick, I've been doing ads for Danny Babona for the better part of a year now for UCI Baseball. If you're a young buckaroo out there on the diamond and you need to go to a good college, UCI is the place to go. They should call it UC Newport Beach because it's right there.

But you got even more reason to go now because my friend Daniel Babona is now a father. Congratulations, Danny. I can't wait to meet Colt. Congratulations, Kirsten you guys are going to be dynamite parents and i can't wait to watch that kid turn into a big leaguer and i'm going to fucking be there every step of the way beautiful guys that'll be it for episode 40 something of going deep and chat jt thank you guys so much for writing in, for being stokers, and for everything. Check out bonus content at patreon.com slash chat goes deep.

And shout out to our sponsors. Thank you guys very much. I've got to hang out with my godson more, though. You have a godson? Yeah. Who? Angel. Oh, for sure.

Shout out to Angel. What up, Angel? That's it. Later.