Going Deep with Chad and JT - Ep. 58 - Strider/Joe, World's First Beer, Body Scrubs

Episode Date: February 20, 2019

What up stokers, in episode 58, we welcome Strider and Joe back to celebrate a fire V day. Strider dives into his plans and describes his body scrub experience. We discuss Justin Bieber and Hayley Bieber not boning before marriage and dive deep into the quesh's. Check it out m'dawgs! Check out our patreon: www.patreon.com/chadgoesdeep

what's up stokers of stoke nation this is chad kroger coming in with the going deep with chad jt podcast i'm here with my comp Kroger coming in with the Going Deep with Chad and JT podcast. I'm here with my compadre, John Thomas with the fire chug. What up? Boom, clap, Stokers. What up, dog? Dude, way to take that down your gullet. Thank you.

That was my second. I accidentally did a chug before we were live. I was like, dude, it's not recording yet. You got to show the Stokers how you take it down. I love your chug for you guys. We are joined once again by our favorite dogs, Strider and Joe. What up? Yo, what's up?

What up, dude? Sorry, I wasn't ready. Hey, what's up? The human noise machine, the masticator. Dude. Hey, happy Valentine's Day, guys. Hey, yeah. Should we get straight into it?

Let's talk about the V. Well, I mean, it is. We're recording on the day. Yeah, it's great. It recording on the day yeah it's great it's the v-day feeling the love last time on we had our last episode a couple days ago and we me and chad were going over our valentine's day plans and i was talking about how uh i've gone on a couple dates with this gal and you know it was fast but we were going to go on another date on valentine's day two days ago i get the text message hey i've had a really good time with you you've been lovely and nice but i don't see a romantic future and i responded like uh i actually do

think you see a romantic future yeah and then i said sorry that's too much good luck to you i hope we can remain friends you should have been like don't be scared but then i talked to joe and chat about and i was like dude this girl is out of her mind like not to be rude you know but i was killer on those dates i was crushing it i mean you know was i talking about myself a lot yeah but do we get into a couple of dicey arguments about the future acting prospects for the lead from uh roma yeah but i had to be myself yeah but this early on valentine's day you just gotta let it pass. Unless it's like a Saturday you could get away

with, because you're like, oh, let's go out on Saturday. Oh, it's also Valentine's Day. But like, Valentine's Day is a Thursday this year, so you made it a point to be like, oh, we gotta hang out on Valentine's Day. Yeah, is that what scared her? Yeah, you wouldn't see the stride man doing something like that.

That's a scary time to start a new relationship right near valentine's day yeah i just throw caution to the wind who cares let's go maybe we're in love maybe we're not here's here's my thought i i had maybe there's too much talking yeah we talked a lot maybe you should cut the date short and been like hey look it's been nice covering u.s history with you but i gotta go tape up joe's hog i i look if i had something to do like that i would have gone to do it but i didn't have anything to do like and i'm busy but like my thing is like she said she wanted to talk let's talk i i can't read the signals she was saying let's talk i said all right fuck it we'll talk all day i can talk for hours and then all of a sudden now i find out i've been talking too much well what the fuck is it i don't know what to do very confusing yeah you talk a lot yeah but i can't i can't she she said she

wanted to talk but you talk dank dude you're the master articulator dude the bomb dickity orator dude over here yeah dude i mean maybe dude look look dude love is it's a symbiotic relationship dude you know i mean you're dodging a bullet here that's how i'm looking at it dude look it you're in it and you're probably hurting a little bit and you're feeling like oh my gosh what i do wrong dude you're doing you and you're being you and you did nothing wrong you guys just didn't match thank you next well that's what i was gonna say thank you next i learned from it you know i wish her well he wasn't even that into her i don't think that that too yeah you are a phenomenal conversationalist so i'm sure the conversations are fire. But maybe she wanted to talk more, but you've just been like, all right, no more.

You need some anticipation. Well, most of our conversations were her turn, my turn. And we didn't really build up on what the other ones said. We just kind of like, how long do I have to wait? And then we'd go. But yeah, I did come back from another date with another person when she dropped the bomb on me that she didn't want to go out on Valentine's Day. Maybe she saw you.

That's what I thought. Did you see me at the Grove? Because I went to the same place that I'd gone with her. Yeah. But you feel safe at the Grove. Dude, no joke. One time, JT and I cruised into the Grove. I think we were seeing like some movie.

Oh, dude, we went to go see The Mule. Not that great of a movie, but impressive that, you know, what's his name? Eastwood's, you know, directed and acting at his age what a legend was he like 90 yeah yeah he's 120 guys got energy dude but we walk into the grove 15 kids jt dude no joke takes a nice little puff of his j and goes i love it here it's a great spot yeah we were overlooking the the Grove in the parking lot. I had some weed. I smoked it. I just stared out longingly, and I was like, I love it here. And then there's the bar right by the fountain.

You ever sit out there? Dude, that's nice. Just look at the fountain going off. It feels like you're on vacation. Especially around Christmas time. Oh, man. It feels like a vacation. We did that this year.

It was nice. That was nice. You too? Yeah, yeah. Have a little appetizer up by the little fountain. Yeah. Watch her. I am freaking jelly of that.

I mean, this is what I do too. I'm always down to go hang out at the Cheesecake Factory. I love the Cheesecake Factory. Yeah, I'm always wanting to go over there, and everybody's making fun of me. I'll hang out at Maggiano's too. Baby, Maggiano's is no Cheesecake Factory, but it's all right. Well, Maggiano's, not so much the food, but I'll hang out in the bar. Ambience.

I haven't really ventured into Maggiano's. Dude, no need. I love any place like the Grove where they create this ambience where it's just like a utopia where there's like J. Crew, fire t-shirts, a movie theater, a fire bar. Apple. But dude, I will tell you this. Anything is possible. The Grove is like District 1 from Hunger Games.

That's what I was going to say. Yeah. It is. I like that, though. I like that. I love it. No one's ever died there. Everyone lives forever and smiles there.

Yeah. District 12 sucks, dude. What's the rest of the boys' game plans for Valentine's? I mean, I'm pretty amped. I can kick it off here, dude, if you guys want. I'm going to start it off. Yeah, go ahead. Let's hear it. This is the Strider episode. Valentine's Day. Oh, dude, I can kick it off here dude if you guys want I'm gonna start it off yeah go ahead let's hear it

this is the Strider episode Valentine's Day oh dude I appreciate you saying that dude amped to be here right now dude guess what you might be thinking to yourself

Strider don't you gotta be taking care of activities to get Valentine's Day all prepped it's been done dude now I sit back and relax the cogs are turning my friends dude

it's gonna be a dang little day we have assistants but no baby I did this all on my own. Went to the Grove. Thank you very much. Seas.

Done, dude. Got them sitting in my desk. Seas candies. Yep. Oh. Scotch mollusks. I always save one for JT when he comes over, dude. Thank you, dude.

Of course, dude. And so I got those going right now, dude. The only thing I'm leaving to pick up is the flowers so they're fresh when I get home, dude. They're going to be fresh and in a vase that me and my GF have. And tonight, dude, I had options for my GF, and the text just came through. We're going to be doing sushi at Sugarfish. Oh, dude. I got to say, the best bang for your buck sushi.

Now, look, it's not cheap, but it's Valentine's Day, baby. But it's also not the most expensive sushi. I'll tell you what. Didn't you do that last year? We did. I mean, I don't mean to call you out, but, I mean maybe the best things repeat themselves okay that's a sequel let's get some originality here it is an interesting kind of like question like is it better to do something new or is there like extra meaning in doing the same thing over again fuck dude um that you are putting dot my dome, but let me tell you what, dude. I know my GF is big on Valentine's Day, and I'll tell you why.

Because her birthday is the day before. So I freaking crushed it for her B-Day. Entirely separate days. You cannot clump them together. You have to separate the days, dude. Own flowers, own card, different gift birthday. Boom, sun goes down, sun comes up. Maybe a little boning.

And, dude, then when the sun comes up valentine's day new candies new cards new gifts new meal wait so her birthday is when the 13th oh because caroline's is the 17th really whoa i'm in the same situation what zodiac sign is that i think it's still aquarius aquarius yeah nice dude Like me. Aquarius. Oh, yeah, dude. We had a dank birthday celebration for you, dude. We had a nice old-fashioned, got lit on fire before I drank it. We're all in a competition, the four of us, to see who can die with the most guy friends in history.

Joe had a strong showing on his B-day. Yeah, Joe. There was 56 guys there. Dude, you're a straight-up utility, bro. I'm good with men. I've been into different dude groups. Yeah, I'm good at feeling out. You're a universal part of the machine.

You'll fit anywhere. Yeah, it fits into any machine. Yeah. What are you doing tonight? I just got to go to work, and that's basically it. Are you feeling the crush of Valentine's Day at all or no? The crush of it? Yeah, I don't know if that's the right word, but like the pressure, the loneliness.

No, not really. Fire. But thanks for bringing it up, so maybe now as the day goes on. But we'll see. No, I mean, I feel good right now. I got some good sleep last night. Good, good. Yeah, I mean, I feel good right now. I got some good sleep last night. Good, good. Yeah, I mean, I got up at like 1230.

Nice. Yeah, you were a little late. Yeah, I was, you know, I've been tired lately. It's just rainy weather, dude. Yeah, the rain takes a lot out of you. It's raining hard out here. I've been grinding hard just mentally and it takes a toll. What's your Valentineentine's day plan uh we're going to dinner

at um burger akasha i don't know where it is that sounds official it's called akasha that's gonna be nice yeah it came off a recommendation from her friend sounds like that place has an album coming out dude dude it does sound like It's like a fat EDM beat drop. Big time, dude. Yeah, we're going to Akasha. And it should be a nice dinner. I'm trying to figure out what to wear, you know? Because usually I rock pants with Vans and a tee.

And it's winter, so some kind of jacket. But I'm like, maybe I should step it up, baby. I have some Banana Republic shoes. Hell yeah, dude. Yeah, let's ditch the man more like khakis but they're still slim fit so i'm not gonna betray my style for sure then i'm maybe thinking i don't know if there's too much though my dogs help me out especially strider um maybe a blazer with like a t oh i respect i love that yeah i would like to i would like to gamble when i look like that dude i like to go to the blackjack table and throw down hundies, dude.

Something blue. Never mind that green shit, dude. Yeah, I love it. Fucking C notes, dude. Drop them down there and then lose it. Sweet action, baby. Beast. Dude, yeah, you're going to look good.

Chad and I, yesterday, we were going into a meeting. And right before the meeting, he told me, he was like, yo, instead of flowers, I think I'm going to get her a bouquet of chicken tenders. And I was like, and Chad was looking for support. And my face literally grimaced. And I was like, I think that's a terrible idea. And then we straight up beefed before the meeting. We went into the meeting.

They were like, what do you guys think about a prank show? And then me and Chad. Chad figured out the right gift, right, Chief? So why don't you back off? I felt all bad. I was like, I fucking abandoned my dog when he needed support. We came out of the meeting. I was like, dude, I'm sorry. I just didn't think it was a i was like dude i'm sorry i just didn't think it was a good idea if anyone said that i wouldn't think it was a good idea and chad was like lie to me dude i was like i'm sorry

dude well yeah i was i was i was gonna get something else i thought but i was like i thought it'd be hilarious because like um we always get like chicken nuggets so i'm like because like i didn't want to do like the you know everyone, everyone does like the, the fucking like, there's like the, uh, the classical like flowers and chocolate. I'm like, I don't want to be like predictable.

Yeah. Maybe it's cliche. I want it to be kind of like, you know, out of the box. Like, Whoa, where'd you come up with that?

Out of the McNugget box. Out of the McNugget box. But ultimately I decided not to go with the bouquet of nugs. Maybe I'll throw that out there in another day. She's probably listening to this, so I'm not going to say when, so it's still a surprise, but expect a bucket full of nuggets as flowers. And then we started going through different variations. You were like, flowers are lame, and I was like, are they lame?

And then I was like, you know, I just struck out with this chick. I was like, maybe I'm old now, and I just don't get it with, like, chicks. So then we were like, all right, what about a bouquet of chicken nuggets? But then there's some chocolate strawberries in there. It got convoluted. I don't know. I mean, dude, as long as it's your truth and like you guys, it sounds like you guys get nuggets together and that's something that's like cute

and reminds you of dank times together. So that's kind of nice. That's what I thought. That was my original thought. But I decided this was going to come out after V-Day. So I decided with a couple's massage oh fire experience over item yes experience i like that so i'm afraid of massages dude um i spent a summer abroad in china teaching english and uh this guy that i was staying with bb uh

cameron was his uh american name and I was terrible at speaking Chinese, although I used to know a little Mandarin, dude. Wa, I, neat. That means I love you, dude. Terrible accent. Horrible, dude. But that's what that means. But appropriate phrase for the day, my dog. Appreciating that, my lord.

And I went to get a massage at this Chinese bathhouse. And two dudes, like, in Yao Ming jerseys just came out. And, like, something got lost in translation. and i got a body scrub from these two guys they put on like coarse yellow glove like coarse like like uh fucking uh dishwasher gloves that like get out the hard stuff you know and just rubbed my whole my entire body was red dude what they got in my grundle they got in my b-hole they got they lifted up my my little dong dude and got in between my balls and dong the base area he's so polite dude he just suffered through it dude you didn't want to be disrespectful to their culture wow dude i just let it house like

this i guess this is how this they do massages here this is maybe they got the base of your hog dude everything dude that exfoliated howated that feel horrific oh horrible but afterwards like two days later glowing i was glowing oh really your grundle was nice everything yeah had a nice sheen big time dude you still have a nice grundle dude imagine walking out the other day walking in and two yelmings are just exfoliating striders b-hole big time dude strong these guys they were carrying out a conversation dude going through probably their evenings you know just talking yeah i tried to do it with women but like one time we were like four of us went to get massages three tiny asian women and one giant

asian guy walk in and you're facing this way so you don't know who's gonna show up behind you and i was like please give me one of the chicks please give me one of the chicks and then i just feel these huge fingers and down on my shoulders. And then by the end of it, like, it's a tough gig. The guy's working his ass off. I respect it. But, like, at the end of the gig, all four of them are on their knees, like, seated at your feet.

And he's lotioning my toes and pulling on each one individually. And I was just making eye contact with him. Like, dude, let's just cut it quick and, like, be done with it. Dude, it's like that one movie, War Dogs. Do you ever see that with jonah hill and miles teller yeah miles teller goes from masseuse to arms dealer oh yeah i'm not buying it dude yeah that movie was like he's like i want to be a masseuse and you're like what he's like i'll sell it like in 47s and no disrespect to jonah hill but he came in a

little puffy on that one yeah i think miles teller is going to be Goose's son in the Top Gun 2. Really? Yeah, the new Top Gun. He's in Top Gun? Yeah. Is Maverick's son going to be in it? I think Tom Cruise is going to be in it. Wait, it's a remake?

Or is it Top Gun 2? No, I think it's like a sequel. Wow. I think it's Top Gun 2, yeah. Because they've got Goose's son. Unless it's a callback sequence. Non-Maverick, who's your favorite pilot from Top Gun too, yeah. Because they've got Goose's son. Unless it's a callback sequence. Non-Maverick, who's your favorite pilot from Top Gun? Iceman, just because of the way that he walks in the steam room shower.

Do you see how puffed out his chest? He walks like Clinton Westlake, dude. Just like our bro from Ice, just like, you're dangerous. And just walks off, dude. And then at the end, you can be my wingman any day, dude. Guy comes full circle. Legit. at the end you can be my wingman any day dude guy comes full circle legit we've also got options are a goose viper jester cougar what about hollywood hollywood i'm gonna go with hollywood he's like

mav what are you doing man what are you doing we're on his tail what are you doing he's like i will fire when i'm goddamn good and ready you've got that dude nice nice but hollywood was he was he was like trying to get mav back into right headspace he's like dude goose died like but you got this dude like our squad is still pretty strong you're right and hollywood steps up and he's in the the jet with him dude so yeah in the end yeah yeah i like uh just because i like tom scared as the teacher, I go Viper. Yeah, I mean, he's a legend, dude. Joe?

I don't really have one. Oh, come on. Right on. What about? Call sign Joe. His call sign would be Joe. Joe. Yeah, he's like burping and farting into the thing the whole time.

Everyone's like, communications are being muffled. He's like, yeah. Yeah, nice turn, Viper. He's flying with yeah yeah nice nice turn viper he's flying with a coffee mug in his hand as he's got the stick in the other one dude it was also interesting that movie like it was really hard to understand what the guy in the back seat did like literally the whole time he was just like jutting his head around like i think he's on our tail i was like do you just look around do you not have like a more technical thing to be doing yeah that's like the job that's what they

seem like in the movie and you're at the mercy of the pilot you're kind of just sitting there like what the fuck are you doing dude yeah you're kind of just a hype man you're going ballistic going ballistic man like dude you that takes a lot of trust too like you've ever been on like the back of someone's bird scooter like obviously i know you guys have like you're on the back of someone's bird scooter like you're trusting them, dude. Remember our ride after the Dodgers game? Epic ride, dude. How far did you guys ride? We went from La Brea past Fairfax.

Might as well have been Perth to Perth, baby. It was a nice trip. I'm the same bird. Literally laughing the whole time. It was so much fun. There's one thing I wanted to say. Jester's pretty cool too and when uh when uh maverick goes below the flight deck he's like get your butts back to base you just shot me down but

you went below the flight deck get your butts back yeah jester because he never he's like the most serious one in the crew too yeah yeah it's like an ironic name for him did you guys read this article about justin bieber waiting to have sex with hayley baldwin now hayley bieber before their marriage i did i did he's in one of these posh hollywood churches now they're super popular so it's like a christian denomination or yeah but it's got like a hollywood flair to it where i think it's a lot of like uh acres of diamonds kind of like right i mean dude i read a little bit more in that article prosperity religion and i think justin bieber saying like you know something good you know don't let sex like be the only thing but then you read further and they're like then they got married in three

months and like i feel like that's pretty standard to wait like if you're dating someone like maybe he should be like dude wait to get married yeah yeah uh instead of waiting on just the boning even though you didn't even wait like that's a yeah uh instead of waiting on just the boning even though you didn't even wait like that's a pretty standard amount of time to to uh you know get it in for the first time uh for lack of better uh terminology strider you nailed him you nailed him dude but maybe in beaver time because he can get laid so easily maybe that's like years for a regular human being it's like yeah that's right yeah True. I would say that, too. They said he did a year of celibacy, though.

You've already done it. For sure. It's the law of diminishing returns, dude. You know what I mean? You take that first bite of that dank Kansas City bone-in ribeye steak, dude, and you're just enjoying that, dude. But guess what, dude? That's 16 ounces, baby.

By ounce number 12, you're like, am I about to pack this up and take it home for the pup? Maybe, dude. I agree with the analogy, but I don't agree with the food you chose for it, dude. Really? You don't like the Kansas City Bonet? I think that one stays good to the last morsel. Dude, let me tell you what.

My dog right here, I trust him when it comes to steaks, dude. Really? Make no mistake about it. My dog, JT, can crush a steak and order a steak, dude. So, respect. Thank you, dog. Yeah, pretty much what strider was saying i mean yeah you say you sell it for a year i mean i wonder what they were doing like

while not boning like what kind of heavy dry dry humping was going on he's like let's just get married there's nothing better than dry humping he's just jizzing in his pants i've done that before too by the way i've gone celibate for like almost a year this is by choice yeah yeah why well it's sometimes you just got to uh you know clear the hopper yeah maybe he was doing a little something like from that movie uh my gf and i recently rewatched uh 40 days and 40 nights with josh hartnett dude oh yeah oh right yeah and remember that he like uh does the flower thing dude makes her come with a just by blowing on a flower on her private part yeah legit i i do like the message he's trying to uh bieber's trying to like convey just like it's not all about boning that's true too it's good message yeah he just didn't need to like trash people who

do bone yeah it's a very gross generalization yeah oh people who do bone lack self-worth it's like well most people lack self-worth i think's like, well, most people lack self-worth. I think people just like to bone, dude. Yeah, it's kind of fun. Anticipation is a huge aphrodisiac. That's so true, dude. One time I got into that like nofap thing for like a couple months. So I like didn't J off. And then like the first time I hooked up with a girl,

when she like first touched me, I was like, oh, dude. That felt so good. I'm anim and american punk she must have loved that's a tough one this one i'm also not big on the terminology fap dude you know what i mean i don't know what does that mean i know just don't do it why join like some club like just don't do it yeah dude fap one time we saw hayley baldwin and steven baldwin at the beach and we were playing beach volleyball. And our boy Daniels, who was my beef of the week last week, was freaking the fuck out. Every time he missed a spike, he was like, God damn it, fuck. And he wouldn't stop cussing.

We're like, yo, John, relax, bro. And he couldn't calm down. He just kept going, fuck, shit, fuck. And then finally at one point, Stephen Baldwin just turns and he's like, hey, guys, can you watch it? You're kind of freaking the kids out with the language. And we had to literally be like, sorry,ven baldwin and get back to the game disappointing steven baldwin was not something i ever thought we would do all right did you guys see this article that they discovered the first remnants of beer i did in england dang yeah that's awesome was it like in a mug yeah dude that would have been legit. It's just like a golden mug.

You just eat a rock and get hammered. Oh, dude. Yeah, dude. That just lets me know that some dude in the frickin' 400th century B.C. didn't Zamboni that, and that's kind of a letdown, dude. Dude, yeah. You don't let that brew go to waste. It's like they have a time capsule.

Let's put a wounded soldier in there. Exactly, dude. Oh, dude, we wish we could wake up your friends and let them know that you didn't complete your task yeah get the fuck out of our cave dude get out dude zamboni yeah some woolly mammoth's gonna get you also dude i did read in that article because i was all amped up i'm like is this a nice little hoppy little ipa that they were enjoying back then dude turns out they didn't use hops until the 15th century AD. So what, how did you find that out? In that article, dude, just kept reading, dude. Dude, you read the whole article? I mean, dude, you know what I mean? I got all my Valentine's Day stuff done, dude. I'm just freaking fired up. Dude, the wheels are in

motion, dude. This place, Sugarfish, doesn't take reservations, baby. I'm going to get there early, dude. Put my name in, cruise home, make my GF. You know, I like to do theme dates, dude. We're going to have a nice little Sapporo at the house and Uber over there, dude. Lyft actually, dude, because they treat the drivers better according to my GF, dude. So that's going to be it. I love how socially conscious she keeps you, bro. Dude, she keeps me lit on all these things, dude. Like, dude, I'm getting Etsy stuff for the apartment online, dude. I'm getting independently owned businesses are supplying our stuff, although sometimes you got to go corporate you know like cb2 or whatever and get the bed frame you know unless there's someone who's legit drilling it on etsy or you know

pinterest i don't know about but uh yeah dude fired up fired up anyway dude hops came about in the 15th century and that's when they were making dank little hazy little ipas that i know joe likes nice yeah ipa were you guys at all bummed out that the origins of beer the earliest origins of beer were not domestic no i thought it was i thought germany was the uh was where beer started but yeah no i knew it wasn't here or the czech republic maybe yeah the czech republic's a lot and the monks dude the monks were the ones because they weren't boning dude so they had time like to just have hobbies and like figure out you know this is how we make beer like chame or whatever or uh not chavasse i think she made that beer yeah that's a monk beer from belgium

i think and like uh that that recipe tastes like bubble i like that you're a genius we got a message from a stoker who was like a little disappointed that we go in so hard on carbs. Oh, really? He's like, dude, I like to eat carbs. What's the big fucking deal? Well, then don't listen. I'm just kidding. You got to eat healthy carbs.

Yeah, like complex carbohydrates. Sweet potato. Well, I mean, I eat a lot of quinoa and garbanzo beans. Are you doing hummus? Or chickpeas, if you will. No, I are you doing hummus or chickpeas if you will uh no i don't need i don't need hummus all right dudes should we answer some questions yeah let's do it all right first up we've got luke let me split a fat what up to chad from the east coast my man but i have a serious problem at my hands here bro i'm about to graduate high school and i've been really looking at a college that's three hours away from my hometown where But I have a serious problem at my hands here, bro. I'm about to graduate high school, and I've been really looking

at a college that's three hours away from my hometown where I currently abide. But the problem is, my old girl is here in my hometown, a grade below me, and we've been kicking it on and off since middle school. But she has no interest in going to this school, and she said she'll leave by herself to another state and college if I go. So do I go to the college and chase new

puss, getting hammered downtown every week in a future career, or do I stick it with my shoddy puss, getting hammered downtown every week and a future career? Or do I stick it with my shoddy and seek other means of employment and further education? Thanks, bros. Dude, just by the writing, what up, by the way? It sounds like he was more amped on the first idea of going to the original college. You know? The way he's talking about it, he's like, maybe I go to college, get hammered every weekend, just, like, live my life.

And the other way, he's like, or maybe I just stay behind. Like, he didn't – I think you got the answer right there. Yeah, I mean, and, yeah, he's in high school about to go to college. Yeah, I mean, you're so young. If you guys are going to end up together, there's plenty of time for that. So you got to go – you got to find your own path right now. So I would go to the college yeah i agree dude i mean look i think it's dank that you got a gf dude and i respect that

and also dude you're living at two extremes right now you don't go to party and go out and get shmammered every single night in college you can also go to college and have a nice time dude maybe smoke a little jay maybe have an ipa i don't know what i mean you know i'm gonna pull a guitar here or whatever with the boys and then when you go home and see your girlfriend on the weekend i mean dude look it's not like we're living uh in the 1800s where you gotta take a train it's three you know, I'm going to pull a guitar here or whatever with the boys. And then when you go home and see your girlfriend on the weekend, I mean, dude, look, it's not like we're living in the 1800s where you got to take a train.

It's three hours, dude. You got the internet and you can Skype and all that type of stuff. Yeah. You ever done a Skype diddle session with your GF dude? A lot of fun, dude. Dude,

it's super fun. A lot of fun, dude. HD camera, dude. One time my coworker goes like this, he was dating this girl in Australia, dude.

I won't say his name so they can remain anonymous. He goes, dude, date my girlfriend in Australia, dude. I won't say his name so they can remain anonymous. He goes, dude, date my girlfriend in Australia, dude. I'm amped because I just got a brand new HD camera for our Skype phone sessions. And I go, nice, dude. She's going to like that. That means your balls are going to be in HD, not the other way around. Yeah, but dude, you know what? She might like that.

Yeah, enhance those balls. Some ladies like it. No, no, I'm sure she did. But he thought like he was like, oh, dude, I'm fired up. He thought he was going to be seeing the HD. And I'm like, nah, dude, that camera's aimed at you. Figure out how to do a good close-up on it. Always do close-up.

And don't put anything that can put any scale in there. Yeah, I had a roll of quarters right next to it. No roll of dimes for me. I had my chapstick next to it just bearing over my dime. Smart. Maybe a tack or a paper clip, dude. You know what I mean? Maybe, like, get one of those, like, Mr. Rogers villages so it tack or a paper clip, dude. You know what I mean? Maybe get one of those

Mr. Rogers villages so it looks all big over it, dude. Maybe not the best blend of two worlds. You just set it down on a small little miniature house. A Christmas village.

Yeah, one of your mom's Christmas villages. Yeah, yeah. Boom, there goes the Grand Central Station, dude. Wait, you mean the thing covering this roof? I'll tell you one thing.

Joe's going gonna need a 35 millimeter wide lens to capture all that no question freaking tarantino's gonna direct out the hateful eight more like the hateful nine and a half dude what up fat dog dude i tricked my gf dude we have skype sex and then i she goes show me your dong and i got joe in the room hard right next to me and i just do a close-up of his piece movie magic yeah movie magic yeah we'll do the dick off dude i would tell this youngster as well that these questions are tough because i think he loves this girl for real but the numbers say you guys will probably not end up together and you're getting into your college age which means you're going to explode

socially, intellectually, and hopefully sexually. I mean, be polite and respectful out there, but those are the prospects you're looking at. And you know, there are anomalies. I had a friend who went to a college to stay with his girlfriend when he could have gone to a college that maybe raged harder. And now they have kids and they're happily married and he's got a good gig. But that would not have been the thing that I would have wanted to pursue. So I would tell you, make the choice that you would make if nobody else in the world was influencing you. Just pick the place that sounds best to you. Don't think about anybody else because this is the time to be selfish, my dog. What's up, Sultan Sestoke? Huge fan of the pod. It truly boasts my endorse and places me in

an enlightened state when I walk to classes. I believe it radiates to others as well when I meander through campus. I'm writing to you guys because I've been stumped by an interesting question. I'm in college and recently started a fitness Instagram. My goal is to make a business out of motivating and teaching those who want to lift and lift correctly. I use the gram for teaching purposes, but also post shirtless pics. For instance, I want to see my progression, the seps and chesticles so i post pics of my body on the gram the other day i received a text from an old co-worker that i worked with in high school she is four years older than me i am 21 we never had talked until i started

the gram she was nice and supportive about it and then i suspect she drank a gallon of green juice because she got bold two months ago she asked for my snap but i didn't respond then just yesterday after posting a pic on the gram on my bod, I got a text in the middle of chemistry class. She acknowledged she was stepping over the line and proceeded to ask in a proper manner to see me naked. I was in awe of the request, but applaud her for the boldness. I discussed with my friend what my options were. He said to leave her on read or make her life and send the pics. What do the monarchs of Stoke think? Keep in mind, I have no attraction to her whatsoever and have not responded to a text in two months from her p.s i'd like to stay anonymous thanks stoke nation rep well also yeah if you have no sexual attraction to her why would

you even think what's the problem here why would you send her a naked pic i think he thinks he would feel cool to know that a woman was masturbating to him or excited to see his body. What is he, a cam model? No, you can't. Why? I mean, that's what's the. Yeah. Is he like this guy?

Sounds like he's got like a huge ego. It does sound a little bit like he's getting his jollies off. Oh, chicks want to see me naked. Try selling them pics. Fucking meathead. Strides, what do you think? Yeah, I don't think I really like this guy, if I'm being honest. That's a pretty ridiculous question.

It is, dude. I mean, because not many guys get the request of, can I see you naked? So this guy, oh, I'm in a predicament now. This guy's got real problems. Yeah, dude. I mean, look, like, yeah, you definitely 100% don't send the pic. I mean, what's the benefit of it other than just feeding your ego and having a cool story to tell?

And it's like, look, dude, sometimes you don't have to see it through. The possibility is there. You've already got the story that's good enough if you need it. And, you know yeah bro i mean and then if you send that then she's gonna think she's got a chance with you and she's gonna stalk you even harder yeah it's not gonna be a one-time thing it's gonna extend because if you send that it's like inviting and you didn't want to put that in that the ether too now it's on the web yeah that's true what's, too. What is she going to do with that? Correct, dude. I'm kind of an anti-all

naked photos on the web guy. Like, why do that? Yeah. Why put yourself at risk? Yep. Woman problems. What's up, bros? I love the pod and hoped you guys could give me some advice. I'm 20 and I'm still a virgin. I'm currently living at home going to college which makes it even harder to meet

girls. I'm a pretty good looking guy and have a lot of friends and have been hitting the gym a lot and put on 20 pounds and I'm getting pretty jacked but have trouble talking to the ladies I know some potential babes I could talk to who like me at least as a friend but I hate having conversations over text or snapchat because it always seems like the conversations go nowhere

I feel hopeless in my sex life and don't know where else to turn any advice would be much appreciated thanks boys he's 20 and still a virgin I feel hopeless in my sex life and don't know where else to turn. Any advice would be much appreciated. Thanks, boys. He's 20 and still a virgin? Yeah. No, it's not bad. I'm just...

You feel for him. Yeah. And he's 20, so he can't really go to bars and... Yeah. I mean, get a fake ID. Get a fake ID and go to the bars if you can. Yeah, 20 is such a weird age. Yeah, you're in between.

You're not a teenager anymore, and you're waiting to be 21. It's so annoying. Yeah, dude. It's a weird year. Yeah, it's tough. Yeah, go ahead. Well, I was thinking, like, you know, he's doing the texting and the Snapchat. It's hard to, like, build something through just, like, texting and stuff.

Like, why don't you text them, ask them out, try and get some some actual dates going so he said he was a charming guy like good looking get that one-on-one action get some face time going for sure or dude you're at college join like a freaking kickball team or like an improv group or like whatever your interest or like a some sort of club dude and like you'll naturally be surrounded by people who have your interests and things will be, well, you'll see that the burden will be lifted organically. Dude,

you'll be talking about stuff that you're into normally. Yeah. And dude, virgin at 21. Look, do you all say it right now? The V times day podcast. I was a virgin for longer,

dude. So don't worry about it, dude. And now I'm a fricking just not that good at sex, but I'm definitely better, dude. And I've done it and it's legit, dude. So don't worry about it. Yeah.

Love it. You're getting in the gym. Yeah. All right, dude. What up? Chatting JT. One of my roommates smells like shit. He's one of my good friends.

So I'm wondering how I should approach it. We've tried using Febreze on him and in his room, but it's not getting the job done. It's getting to the point where it affects my other roommate and me in the nostrils. Wondering if you could drop some knowledge on me. This is pathetic. These people that

smell. Like last night, I was given a co-worker ride and he had the worst breath. I couldn't even breathe. I was trying to drive and he was in the back seat and I was still getting hit by this cloud of shit. Was there another co-worker in there yeah i just was like i you know i'm trying to drive and i can't i'm like going like this i'm

gonna but did you say anything no i can't because he was only in the car for five minutes i was just giving him a ride to his car what so what do these guys do they tell they got to tell them right yeah you have to tell them it's disgusting but how do you say it get in the fucking shower that's what you say it's hard for breezing him what i mean what is he yeah is he a rat or something he can't clean himself that they're like trying to clean him? Dude, we knew a stinky person growing up. I won't name them, but they were super stinky, known by the entire world as a stinky person. Did they not know? I don't know if they ever got – someone must have told them. Someone must have been drunk and insulted them.

But I still don't know if that person is better, but they're married now, so they found someone who could accept – they had to marry a foreigner, but they married someone who accepted their stink. Dude, bad breath too is just like when people come at you with bad breath, you're just like, what the fuck, dude? Yeah, dude. Not okay. I've never worked up the courage to tell anyone.

I've told them once in a while, like, here's a piece of gum. Some people can stop criminals with their bad breath. Oh, yeah. It hits you, and you're just like, yeah. Dude, yes, yes. Knocks your headphones off.. Oh, yeah. It hits you and you're just like, yeah. Dude, yes. Yes. Knocks your headphones off. Big time, dude.

What up, Chad, JT, my amigos? I write to you in dire times. My squad is currently dealing with the type of schmole that you haven't addressed yet on the pod. Yes, a lady schmole or schmole. Our squad is composed of both babes and dogs, and we are mega tight. Recently, an attractive lady started hanging out with us

on a regular basis. At first, we were stoked about the situation but things have since taken a turn for the worse. This lady now shows up to every function sometimes uninvited and takes up a lot of space. What I mean is she is very forward and her intense with us dudes, a lot of touching, standing really close and kissing cheeks, necks, sending suggestive texts, etc. This has made the squad very uncomfortable and is hard to address. This shmolette needs to understand that consent is sexy.

She's difficult to poke because one of my bros has a pretty legit crush on her, despite her recent behavior. Any advice on how to poke this shmolette without creating a confrontation with her and my bro? Thanks, dudes. Love your dank weekly advice. Yeah, this is a weird scenario. I don't get it. think we've not gonna say anything dude i would say just be chill to her you know keep your boundaries up at some point it's gonna

work itself out maybe don't respond to the advances yeah just like i mean because they said he said she's attractive so there's worse things than when a girl is cute and is trying to hook up with you, but you don't want to hook up with her. It's like one of the nicest bad things that can happen to you. You're just like, oh, this is terrible. This cute chick wants to hook up with me. You're like, come on, give me space. But deep down, you love her.

Yeah, there's a lot of made-up problems today on these questions. Joe laying down the wood. Hey, guys, can you help us? This hot chick keeps like kissing on us. What do we do? Kiss her back, loser. How about that?

What's up, dudes? We have a serious question that needs to be answered. Recently, the crew and I, all big fans of the pod, have been in a heated argument that has split our squad apart. This argument has resulted in a loss of stoke It's a tunnel dog. Well, I couldn't follow that one. Say it again. Does a straw have one hole or two? No, but what was leading up to that?

That his squad was disagreeing about it. Those are the stakes. I think two. No, but what was leading up to that? That his squad was disagreeing about it. Those are the stakes. I think two. Yeah, two. Dang, dude. I mean, I get it. It's one, but it's two. What do you think?

I don't know. Dang. That's tough. I really don't know. I don't know. I think it's got to be two. I thought about it all morning. I just don't know. Dang. That's tough. I really don't know. I don't know. I think it's got to be two. I thought about it all morning. I just don't know.

Because there's... There's both ends, but it's one thing. And it's one hole that has... Multiple entries. Dang, dude. It's a tunnel. It's a tunnel. It's a tunnel. It's a tunnel. It's a pipe.

So does a tunnel have one hole or two? Maybe it's not a hole because there's no bottom. All right. What up, Chad and JT? Love the pod. I'm in a pickle. The squad has been iffy lately because my longtime best friend that I haven't talked to lately has started dating another squad members x i've been closer with this other friend i have plans to go into the military with him but them having beef has me in a predicament

thinking i have to choose a side what's your take also do you guys have any ideas of getting tan in february in minnesota yeah go on vacation you gotta stand by a window dude get yourself a nice window dude just go post up there when the sun's coming up no shame hit the booth yeah maybe you gotta hit the booth go art of fish i think on the friend front you gotta side with the guy you're going to the military with i think what he's doing dating someone else's ex sucks but you guys are about to go into a situation that sucks more and you need to have each other's backs so you might have to let this one slide you can tell him you don't agree but unfortunately because of the stakes you guys are gonna find yourselves in you got to be tight

yeah maybe yeah maybe try to be friends with both like who says yes to decide too yeah yeah you can disagree and then still like try to accept try that route see if it's possible and then hit the booth for sure dude hello stoke masters i'm coming to you today with a question that has been bothering me for a while now i myself don't go to college but many of my friends do i often go to our local state university to party or just have a nice kickback with friends Dude, here's what you do dude you go there you find the pong table bro is my gain up on this thing well i fucking gotta keep leaning in because you're not close enough to the mic i know but usually i'm always back here just keep but it's it's always too low really yeah aaron's been telling you to get closer the whole time aaron my bad dude i think i'm just stepping back because look at these cannons right

here dude i gotta really look at this i gotta have this i gotta be back and spread out today dude because i'm going sleeveless look at that fucking horseshoe that i brought in here wow that's a good try clydesdale just walked across my arm dude one of those budweiser horses dude speaking of bruise my dog what i'm trying to tell you in this call-in question is, baby, go to the pong table. Call next on the pong table so you got something going on, you got some action, and then let the conversation flow from there, dude. Just make sure your pong skills are up so you can run it at the table, dude.

Have an activity, dude. That's what I'm saying, you know? I love that. Yeah, and bring some brewskis with you to the party, dude. Come in bearing gifts. Like Brad Pitt in Notions 11. He's always eating. Is he too close now, Aaron?

No. Well, it's louder, I feel like. Aaron, I'm so sorry, dude. No, but I think you're right. I think that's the way to do it. You just got to be involved in what's happening in the party. Because if you're not going to school with these kids, then you don't have a lot to talk about with these other people

that your friends are friends with. So you're absolutely right. Take over the drinking games. It's good advice. Become the star of the party. I was in junior college in San Diego, and I'd go out with my friends who went to University of San Diego. And people really did treat me like a second-class citizen.

It was pretty hard on my self-esteem. So what I did was bury myself in literature, film, and my hand. I jacked off all the time, buried in my room, read a chapter, watched some porn. That was my life for an entire year. And there was good parts of it because I learned a lot. My mind expanded. But if you can do the first part and cut out the J and off,

and also all the In-N-Out I was eating, I gave myself quite a pot belly. It was worth it in the long run because I was humbled, and I came out of it stronger, and I knew what I wanted. Yeah, that was kind of what I was thinking too. Those friends of friends parties are the worst. It's horrible, dude. I'd rather isolate and fucking learn read watch some youtube videos and gain knowledge and you know get stronger and stronger so then when you emerge

you're just like a golden god people one time were like hey where do you go to school it's like mesa and this girl's mesa really walked away from me yeah oh that's gross my friend abom handled it well he's like fuck you i was just like taking it back. Yeah. What's up, Lords of Stoke? I recently found myself involved with this major cutie who I met on Tinder. We've hooked up on numerous occasions. The issue is that she already has another boyfriend. They're in an open relationship and they both sleep with multiple other people, but consider each other their primary partners.

I've caught major feelings for this girl and get kind of jealous when I think about her with some other dude. But when I'm with her, all the anxiety melts away. She's aware that I have super strong feelings for her and that I want to be her primary partner, but she says that I should think of it more like we're BFFs who have sex. Should I learn to get stoked on this non-monogamous situation I found myself in, as I'll be able to sleep with other people while staying involved with this woman who I'm so stoked on? Or should I follow my heart and try to convince her to make this exclusive? Despite that she has already told me that this is an unrealistic expectation for our relationship thanks for all your advice and keeping me stoked week after week

this is a tough situation it's not gonna work he's put he's got himself in a bad spot now he's yeah got some serious feelings and and she's not going to. Yeah, there's no convincing. Yeah. It's going to be impossible to convince her to commit. I feel like what you want is very important, but then you've got to ask yourself, what does she want? And I don't think what she wants matches up with what you want at all,

so you've got to kind of move on. He's got to, well, he's got to just, I mean, maybe hang out with her, but also still, you can still see her, but you got to see other people as well like she is. Yeah. But if it's like too obsessive, maybe try and distance yourself. So you can make it a little more healthy. That's got to suck, dude.

Sounds like he's in too deep. It sounds like this dude wants to be monogamous. Yeah. And even if she jumps ship from that guy and is with you, she'll probably end up wanting to have a side boo on top of you. You know what I mean? You guys just don't seem compatible in terms of your desires. Yeah.

100% agree, dudes. Strides, what would you do if your Khaleesi wanted to be open? I would say, I mean, dude, that would be very, very surprising, dude. Very surprising. But, you know, let's take this hypothetical for a walk. I would say, all right, that sounds chill. Who's the dude? Who's the dude?

Because there's probably got to be someone in mind. You know what I mean? You don't just say, I want to see someone else. You got to have a plan, dude. Who's this guy? Who's the dude? Because there's probably got to be someone in mind. You know what I mean? You don't just say, I want to see someone else. You got to have a plan, dude. Who's this guy? Yeah, yeah. Then when I find out who it is, we go out on the paintball course. Me and him.

One-on-one. Camp Pendleton. Go to the Vietnam one, dude. I'm not talking SC Village. I don't want coppers. I don't want anything. I want speedball short course. Me and him.

Barrel plugs out, dude. Obviously, we have a face mask and i'm not some sort of animal don't want anyone to lose an eye and i would fucking light him up dude and then my gf would have no choice but to be like of course i'm a fucking dank legend dude yeah what up chad and jt my girlfriend and i are just phenomenal together we fight very rarely and are super happy and our best friends we started having sex a couple months ago and are each other first. So we were pretty inexperienced and just hoped over time it would get better. A few months later and it hasn't gotten much better for her. It's good for me and not for her. We communicate well and try different positions and we do lots of foreplay. The foreplay is good,

but as soon as we start intercourse, she just doesn't get anything out of it. It's beginning to become an emerging problem in our relationship and I feel like I'm running out of options for how to make sex good for her. Any sex advice? I love her and really want sex to contribute to our relationship instead of taking away. Dude looks... I'm no expert on the female psyche, but it could be

not your fault. I mean, dude, good on you guys for being each other's first. You sound like a caring boyfriend who's legit, so good on you for being dank like that. But maybe she could have something going on that, you know, maybe she's going to see someone about her, talk to her about her. Could be an anatomical thing happening there. It could be like the Cortez of her bod, like keep exploring,

keep trying new stuff, you know, find that new land, and maybe you'll strike gold. Yeah, and enslave the indigenous people. Yeah. For the king of Spain. Yeah, dude, I think Strider's right on the money. I don't think this has much to do with you. I think the best thing you can do is just be eager and curious and don't take it personal.

And don't think that the sex is what makes your guys' relationship. That's just a part of it. For sure. It's a big part. It could be that she's like uh maybe she's expecting too much or like trying to force it so maybe she's just gotta learn to relax and you just gotta like maybe comes with experience yeah dude and look it sounds like you guys were each other's first and maybe you know things were you you know agreed upon something but maybe it was a little rushed and so you got to dial it back and now a little bit and then you just wait and have like a second first you know, things were, you know, agreed upon something, but maybe it was a little rushed. And so you got to dial it back and out a little bit. And then you just wait and have like a second first, you know? I knew a lot of guys in high school who were stressing about like

not making their girlfriends orgasm. And I had other friends in high school who thought their girlfriends were orgasming. And we found out later they were faking it. So I would rest assured that no one in high school is having very good sex. It's all performative. Don't beat yourself up too much. Hey, bros. Max from Utah.

Represent. So here's the sitch. I'm trying to get a mean, dank, chill van that I can take up to the mountains to shred, use to get girls, and drive down to Cali to catch some sick waves and occasionally rip a fat bowl in. But my parents don't respect the van idea. This has been ruining my stoke the past few days, but I will not let the van dream die. I figured I could ask the boys for some help in giving some reasons to convince them into letting me get a van that i can do some serious romping in with the squad thanks for the help bros stay stoked well he wants a van he wants a van to rip bulls in to go shred at the

mountains to go shred at the beach and to get chicks in but his parents do not respect the idea so he wants us to come up with an argument to convince them. Dude, there's tons of articles on the van life. It's like the new thing, you know? Send them some articles. Be like, I'm a new, trendy, modern man. I don't need a stationary house. You know, I need wheels.

I need to be on the move. I need to discover myself, and that's only done in a motherfucking van. Boom, baby. As long as it's a nice new van, dude. I mean, that van's gonna work for everything minus the getting girls part in my opinion van kind of reads a little serial killer to me a little bit like what's going on i don't know if it's a chick who's into the granola

life dude dude i've heard they're popular man it's like nine that's what is this a 90s uh you know full house i think dude they're trendy, dude. I'm telling you. Dude, I think if you want to convince your parents, tell them the truth. That you want a van so you can designated drive kids when they get too drunk at night. Handicapped kids. Smart call, dude. Smart call. That is genius, dude.

I want to give kids safe rides home. Dude, because there's kids out there, disabilities, who got to get their buzz on want to give kids safe rides home. Dude, because there's kids out there, disabilities, who got to get their buzz on and they got to get home. Last question. What up, Stokers? Just curious, what were your GPAs in high school? 6.9.

You set it up. I knocked it down, dude. Next question. What do you mean 6.9? 4.20. my god that was good mine was a 4.20 thank you dude thank you uh dude look man gpa don't get hung up on it i mean i think my gp in high school was like a 3.75 or something like wow yeah you say don't get hung up on it but i can hear your pride when you say it but dude in our high school like you kids had like above 4.0 because of ib and like uh ap and all this shit and it's like dude ib ib like international baccalaureates yeah it's like some special program for like for like smart

kids and those kids were boning i I think those kids invented Molly, dude. No joke. They were science and stuff. They were doing things we didn't even know about. 1.0 GPA. I only graduated because my dad was on the board of the high school. No. Thank you, Dad.

I still owe him a lot for the support he continues to give me. I'm only in this position because... No, I'm not only in this position because of him, but I wouldn't be in this position without him so very thankful for the consistent support you really have a one yeah i was in the ones almost every semester you have to like try to do that dude i literally had tutors who would do my homework for me and then i wouldn't turn it in my brother would like dude i saw you do this homework why didn't you turn in i was like i fucking lost it bro i had like a three a little over three because i got into a lot of big 10 colleges so yeah three three point two maybe

i'd like a three i think yeah three solid beast i never would have liked that time i never did summer school once i like summer school you did summer school for like to go up higher right yeah taking to get an extra class out of the way yeah people and my dad would have me dig a ditch you know just get it done during the year what's the hurry did you still finish did you still finish high school in four years exact same time as everyone but then what's the point but i guess it was like to show colleges like oh i can come in with like a few college units already or something like that you know like i can be uh ready to go i don't know all right dude let's get into joe who is your babe of the week

my uh babe of the week is uh nichelle she is my cycle house instructor. And, yeah, I do cycle house because it's, I mean, it's kicking my ass, and it's great. I am, like, drenched when it's done. My core is, like, steel right now. Love that. And she just pushes you to the max, you know, makes you go. You have to bust it at all times. She doesn't let you take a break and it just it's been amazing and she's a great motivator and i'm so glad that i do that that's

awesome yeah i'm in class is awesome man yeah it's it's great it's i'm killing it over there fantastic i think it is a misconception if anybody thinks that spin classes or these groups that are d or these group exercise courses that are deemed effeminate like zumba or body pump or whatever dude these ladies will kick your ass they are in shape dude like yeah go do those classes and yeah you're gonna feel it pro athletes that go to her class dude they're fire when you're hung over too because you might have a little bit less like a little bit less stoke than you go and they just inspire. Like you just go in there and the music's pumping and they're like saying inspiring stuff and they're toned and you're like, I need to go start a business now. Yep.

Dude, she's made me cry before. She told me one time when I was on there, she told everyone in the class, she's like, picture your dream. And I was too embarrassed to picture it. And she goes, I know you're embarrassed. Picture it it it's like she was in my head and then she said do you see your dream right now do you want your dream right now look at your dream and then she goes now pedal for it and the fucking beat dropped and i was bawling and i was biking as hard as i've ever biked dude i was pushing yeah yes and you know what? I stopped going. Yeah. It was too intense. It was too intense.

Yeah. I don't see it. Because sometimes it'd be like Friday, and I'd be like, am I going to make just spin class? And I was like, I just can't fucking do it today, man. Put my head in my hand and be like, just not today, man. But it's cathartic. Dude, I'm there every Friday.

Love that, dude. If I could afford it, I'd go a lot. Dude, you'll get a a lot dude you can get it you'll get a deal now you can get a deal dude chad goes deep you'll get a deal bro oh really oh for sure we should get sponsored yeah that's what i'm saying you can do that easy bro they'll definitely give you a free sesh once a week or something that men that'd be dank dude thank you strider who is your babe of the week dude my babe of the week's gotta be my gf dude uh this week is her birthday week this week is valentine's dude i mean she is just a straight up a legend dude because

dude she's not doing anything different right now she's just being her being freaking dank and that's all you can ask for dude so without question my GF is my babe of the week for just being my GF, dude. Boom, dude. Nice. Chad, who is your babe of the week? My babe of the week is Caroline, my babe. Dude. Yeah.

Yes, dude. That is so cute. Thanks, Joe. Yeah, she's my babe of the week every week but uh what up it's also her birthday weekend it's valentine's day so i gotta give the shout out what up caroline you're a freaking babe uh you know marie kondo talks about like things that spark joy marie calendars no marie kondo oh you know marie kondo yeah marie calendars does also spark joy it does spark joy pumpkin pies dude they're fresh peach pie yeah that's it you know caroline sparks that joy for You know Marie Kondo? Yeah. Marie Callender's does also spark joy. It does spark joy.

Their pumpkin pies, dude. Their fresh peach pie. Yeah. That's it. You know, Caroline sparks that joy for me in immense ways. It's just like hanging out. Massive joy spark. Stoked tank full.

So, yeah. And she's just super smart. Gives me great advice. We always have the best time together. You know, whether it be just getting after bottomless mimosas or virtual reality just wrecking robots or whatever you know it's always just the best time so i love hanging out you know she loves animals like super compassionate just like a good person the dankest character ever you see how someone is around animals their love for animals you have a good read on like the kind of person that they are so you can tell she's just a sweet compassionate person uh super funny too you know we enjoy the

drama on siesta key and uh shen yun memes so it's kind of an inside joke i guess but yeah i don't know what the hell you're talking about but yeah i'll give a shout out and she's not to mention just a freaking babe love that dude my babe of the week caroline what up that was really nice fire my babe of the week is um my buddy luke's van he had a van in a high school and this kid's question about vans kind of stirred that up for me i used to just see luke pull up to pick up my bro but he would open up the door pot smoke would come out and there would just be eight large teenagers in there just kicking it hard then my brother would just up the door, pot smoke would come out, and there would just be eight large teenagers in there just kicking it hard. Then my brother would just get the biggest smile on his face, and they would pull away.

And I think it was a Toyota Sienna. And they would just cruise all over town. I think they called it 2-1 HQ when they smoked pot in there. And the driver was never stoned. And it wasn't that good looking of a van but there was something about the way luke drove it the way his like dainty arm would kind of rest on it and his hair would be long and flowing he kind of looked like uh like a more badass alan degeneres yeah and uh 100 seeing him in that car was it's an image that will live with me. Did a badass on DeGeneres?

Yeah. I like that image. All right, Joe, who is your Legend of the Week? Legend of the Week is Matt Nagy, head coach of the Chicago Bears. He was named NFL Coach of the Year. Nice. And the Bears are my team, and I'm really excited for him. And it's such a great season they had when no one thought they were going to do well

and just such a quick turnaround of this organization has been kind of in disarray and it's great to see them back. Happy to have this guy at the helm and I think the future is bright and the fans should be excited and we are hell yeah and he's uh seems like a great guy and everything and really uh you know just has the players your relates to him well and everything he's fantastic legend and he wears the visor yeah strider who is your Legend of the Week? Dude, my Legend of the Week's got to be my GF, dude.

And for this reason, dude, we want to get these nice bookshelves that we saw at CB2, but they're a little bit too much coin, dude. But, you know, save up some fat tips. We can purchase those. Then last night, dude, about to go to bed, My GF goes, let me show you something. Pulls out her phone and shows me a dank little Craigslist find of the exact same bookshelves that we wanted. Just the way that she's putting in that effort, dude. Not giving up. Even when she's about to get her rest for the night, dude. Just going, let me check it one more time. Things pop up all the time. Boom.

We found it. We messaged the dude. dude we're gonna go pick him up this week dude fired up about that what a legend dude staying committed my gf dude thank you that's awesome man thanks dude she has a good eye for that stuff she does dude she likes mid-century modern dude um not in love with it she doesn't love too much wood but with you know the egregious gray carpet that we're stuck with in our apartment dude dude, we got to make stuff work. I'm freaking just taking notes, dude, mentally and just freaking figuring it out as I go, dude. So, yeah, dude, I'm very fired up, dude. I'm very fired up.

Yeah, not even to bash the collective here. I think absent of Chad, us three could not find something on the internet. Dude, I couldn't. Dude, 100%. My girlfriend has been like, yo, can you uh help me like do this real quick like just you know message this thing dude like she'll even give me the number put it all out there for me i fuck it up every time dude without fail dude without fail dude she she likes it though i bet she she goes you know what you're you're trying dude you're you're

trying you're trying to figure it out of course i get good kisses and smooches dude and then you know she she'll help me figure it out dude and then it's a team thing dude and that's what's up any excuse for team dude that's what's up dude working out with your girlfriend okay dude so i had her butt you say bring it on this next set honey minute of your best run let's go yeah i always see that if you see when i used to go to the gym a lot you'd see couples and the guy would always have his hand on the girl's butt. It's like, all right. Well, because it's like sport.

You're allowed to in that context. No, no, I think it's more like, you know how in football you tap your bro's ass? Now she's your bro, so you tap her ass like a bro. Yeah, okay. True. I mean, look, I don't want to see too much PDA when I'm at the gym from couples. I do like a nice – every once in a while I'll see a little smooch, you know, fly-by smooch. But also, like, yeah, sometimes you're doing different lifts.

Like, if her leg day doesn't match up with my leg day or, like, I'm doing back and bys, she's doing chest and tris, like, I'm not going to force it, you know what I mean, dude? So, also, my GF and I do have a thing where, oh, yeah. Oh, dude. Yeah, that's what I'm talking about. Dude, wait, get closer to the mic so aaron can hear that dude yeah get the sound in there get the sound dude yeah i'm turning up the game spotting her

and then i'm dipping down for a kiss well here's the thing that kind of flipped her body technically a full arnold press from this form that you're using right there at work dude well i call the gym work just respect that what's the one uh what's the yoga one where you're like this um it's very common downward downward downward dog you're in downward dog oh the camera's on me now downward dog then you just come in yeah what a crevice here we go man you pulled that nice i hope you don't have a head cold if you're pulling a move like that then you know what just you know infections flying around oh no ice bath and zap it dude that's the ultimate test absolutely dude chad who is your legend of the

week my legend of the week i think strider's week? I think Strider's going to like this one. Will Ferrell. This is my dog. Just like my babe, this one's been a long time coming. Will Ferrell is a fucking beast. Legend.

One of my favorite movies, Old School, Anchorman, Step Brothers, Talladega Nights nights what else is gold elf his saturday night live appearances dude one of my favorite saturday night live appearances is when he's they're the fucking european like uh like stuck up european um they were getting like a fashion shop jeffries jeffries and he comes in on the fucking oh yeah rascal scooter yeah yeah and he's like we're going we're going to the dolce gabbana show how fast can you have your bags packed for milan yeah so gold jimmy fallon's just dying but like old school for me is just like i watch that every

day for the summer of 2002 old my mom would just let me watch that movie because my parents are divorced so they're like you can do what you want yeah um i watch that movie every day for the summer because will ferrell is a beast you know so many golden lines in there just like it's kfc still open oh there's a dart in my neck everything in there is gold big time i love those movies so much as well and i get so heated when people hate on him they're like he's not funny anymore he's not funny anymore like they'll be like yeah well phil he's not funny i'm like i get so mad i'm like shut the fuck up all right yeah you suck you're not a judge of comedy go sit on a fucking cone yeah you know what i mean yeah like i get so defensive of him because he's like he's a genius totally he's a total legend and comedy is subjective when you think of him because he's like he's a genius totally he's a total legend and he's comedy is when you think when you think of him he's just like when you think of

him you start laughing he's hilarious anchorman you could quote that entire movie when he dropkicks Jack Black drops kicks Baxter dude that's not really will Ferrell part I mean he's a reacts to it but he set up the stakes for it so yeah yeah yeah it's Phil Hartman style. Yeah, dude. His cameo in Wedding Crashers. Oh, dude. Fire. Amazing.

Yeah. Yep. That was the best. I think it's tough when you're a comedic actor too because I think like everybody in the world, you only have so many moves in terms of what your behavior is and the choices you're going to make. And with comedic actors or actresses, it seems like they always have like three movies where we're like, they're a genius. And then at some point,

everyone's like Eddie Murphy's not funny anymore. Jack Black's not funny anymore. Melissa McCarthy's not funny anymore. Like Kristen Wiig's not funny anymore. When people say that about Adam Sandler, I get so mad. Yeah, Adam Sandler. He's just not funny.

I'm like. They figure out your moves and then they like, once they can expect it, they stop giving you like. it they stop giving you like dude yeah it doesn't surprise them anymore so they don't like it doesn't maybe we all do yeah all right dude my uh legend of the week is um greg greg is uh your roomie my roomie my uh oldest friend since fifth grade besides my bro um dude he he really did like um he was like the first human being my dad said he's like i think greg's your first friend who's on your wavelength and when you meet someone like that and like you kind of dig all the same shit it's nice dude like he got me into reading in the fifth grade he would read tom clancy books like big espionage

thrillers and he passed that to me which was nice hilarious dude seventh grade dude we're at surf camp some kids spend the night some kids leave at the end of the day greg nicknamed one of those kids day camper dave name caught on like wildfire even the even the uh the counselors were calling him day camper dave by the end of it amazing that's when you know you've done a good joke when the when the authorities can't even like help but laugh you know when like a kid makes fun of another kid in school and the teacher laughs? Yep, yep.

That's when you know it's like, come on. That's the truest burn ever. Also, Greg is really tenacious. He will not back down from anyone. I've seen him literally get into fights with MMA fighters. When you're in the moment you can question it but in the long run especially if he's been consistent about it you're like i got a lot of respect for that and i've just known him so long uh sometimes like um a lot of like what

we feel about each other can kind of go unsaid but then once in a while he and i will um just uh like have a moment and we'll like kind of lock eyes and i'm like the love is like so um overpowering it's it's a lot of love and uh yeah he's still my roomie and we'll probably be roomies till um till we fucking die dude we might stay roomies forever dude we just uh we get each other and uh love that and he's a yeah forever dude we just uh we get each other and uh love that and he's a yeah he's got a hog too oh dude and yeah thank you i should i don't want to end this um sentimental talk without mentioning how big his dick is um it's always been fucking huge and um he's super cool about that he is guys quote of the week oh Quote of the week. Oh.

Joe, are you ready now? Strider, you go. Strider, what's your quote? Okay, my quote of the week is, okay, dude. So my new valet job, dude, they have like inspirational quotes of the day. Dude, it sounds corny. It sounds cliche. Dude, who even reads those? And like everyone in our morning lineups acts all chill like,

that quote, great. That's going to work here. Well, dude, it can can't you know what i mean and this quote was dank and i i forget who said it so i don't want to set you up for i don't want to mislead you because i'm gonna uh i don't remember who said it but the quote is uh don't say anything out loud about yourself that you don't want to come true so fuck yeah dude fired it so just because you know if you're saying dude oftentimes we'll mess up we'll go oh man i'm such a dumb i'm such a dumb ass or oh how could i do that silly me nah dude i'm not

saying have denial i'm not saying anything like that you know recognize your mistakes and grow and learn but dude reinforce yourself with fucking positivity and say i'm a dank legend i'm gonna get shit done oh i stubbed my toe i'm not oh i always do that i'm so dumb it's like nah dude fuck in I forgot to pick that up I'm gonna pick that up next time and I'm gonna go out and drill it so just fired up on that dude great quote thank you that Chad what is your quote of the week my quote of the week comes from actually your time up funnier diet comes from Will Ferrell and John C Reilly's one of their first skits green team have you guys seen that one yeah I think so Adam McKay so John C riley goes you know

they're the green team they're environmentalists and he goes first off he goes just because i'm an environmentalist doesn't mean i'm a sissy motherfucker and uh i think that's a good thing to say like you know like yeah i care about the earth and doesn't mean i'm soft and then he's like he gets some good advice he's like make love to mother earth dig a small hole in the ground add some water for lubrication and go to town hell yeah love that literally make love make it sexual to mother earth maybe like on a clay tennis court yeah bone go to a park and bone the ground if you think of gardening as you literally sticking your dick into the grass outside of your house and just laying flat on it and cumming in it. You're going to do it a lot more.

Yeah. Of course. And that's going to be a protein-rich environment for whatever you're planting. Joe is ready. Joe, what is your quote of the week? All right. So in the spirit of Valentine's Day, this one comes from Plato. Love is a serious mental disease. that's uh yeah that's pretty

heavy stuff but also yeah very true because i mean love love can lead to like a lot of mental issues totally like it's like it's kind of the root can be be the root of anxiety, depression. The pursuit of it? A lot of things can stem from the feeling of love, like rejection. Love sets off a lot of things in the brain that can either be great or horrible. Yeah, I think so. And sometimes it's the reality of it. And there's the chemical thing. Right.

It brings you into a state of euphoria. It's like a high from a drug. All right, dude. My quote of the week is from Braveheart. I was inspired by you doing Gladiator last time you were on. But my quote of the week is not William Wallace's quote. It's Robert the Bruce. His dad, who's organized this betrayal of William Wallace,

who's a pure-hearted revolutionary, his dad sets up a betrayal, and he goes, he's talking to his son to kind of like pacify how bad he feels about it. He's like, all men betray. All men lose heart. And then Robert the Bruce goes, I don't want to lose heart. I want to believe as he does.

I will never be on the wrong side again. Boom, dude. Yep. Gets me fired. I don't want to lose heart. That character's good, dude. Great character. And then they went out and fought like fucking warrior poets. great quote and guys that is the end of our podcast we got

a review of the week oh shit a fire review of the week this one brought me to tears it goes met the title is it's from gucci upsir it's from uh it's the subject is meadow rain walker paul walker's daughter Meadow would love this pod. Nuff said. Fuck yeah, dude. That's high praise. Guys, keep pumping in the reviews, rating the pod.

We love it. I think I'm going to the Saddle Ranch tonight. All right. For what? Some people are going there. They have good nachos. Really good nachos. I've never partied there before.

You're going to get on the bull? Oh, fuck. I forgot there's a bull. Are you going to party? Strider, you tell me thisied there before. You're going to get on the bull? Oh, fuck. I forgot there's a bull. Are you going to party? Strider, you tell me this. Do you think I'm going to get on that bull? 100%. How many times?

I'm going to party, but we got meetings tomorrow, so I'm not drinking. You're going to get on the bull. Yeah. I'm going to sober get on the bull. More respect for that. Guys, that'll be it for episode 58. Yeah. 58 of the Going Deep with Chad and JT podcast.

Thank you guys so much for tuning in. Keep tuning in. Keep being Stokers. Rate and review. Strider and Joe, thank you for coming in. Thank you, guys. Thank you, dude. It's always the best when it's the four horsemen of the chillpocalypse.

Oh, my God. That's the dankest thing I've ever heard, dude. I thought of it a couple hours ago. That was great, dude. That's good stuff. All right. Later, Stokers. Later later stokers later stokers Can you listen the concentration we've been a little bit

Pick it up. Pick it up No, pull straight out bend your knees and be strong on the inside go around Let's control the outside. Look, the fire's coming. Are you ready for the fire? We're firemen. We are firemen! The heat doesn't bother us. We live in the heat.

We train in the heat. It tells us that we're ready. We're at home. We're where we're supposed to be. Flames don't intimidate us. What do we do? We control the flames. We control them.

We move the flames where we want to. And then we extinguish them.