Going Deep with Chad and JT - Ep. 78 - Strider Joins, Tongue Action, Getting Air

Episode Date: July 3, 2019

What up stokers, in episode 78, we are once again joined by the relaysh virtuoso, Strider Wilson. We dive into the complexities of tongue action, his upcoming trip to Tahoe, the positive/negative effects of osh water, getting air, and much more! Check out our t shirts at chadgoesdeep.com

Yo, what's up Stokers of Stoke Nation? This is Chad Kroger coming in with Going Deep with Chad and JT podcast. We're coming with episode 77? 78? 8, I believe. 78. Going deep. So on the pod today, we got our compadre Jean-Thomas. Boom clap, Stokers.

And then we got the Relash guru, Strider Wilson. Welcome back. My dog's amped to be here with my bros, dude. Do you feel pressure being the relationship guru? I mean, dude, I feel like, honestly, I feel a little bit fired up about it because relationship guru i mean dude i feel like honestly i feel a little bit fired up about it because it is a it's high praise i feel like this i'm unworthy you know

i'm unworthy and that is innate pressure but part of me loves it part of me i feel you you know i get to go home i get to tell my gf we got something nice you know my bros appreciate it there's stokers out there that appreciate it dude i'm getting some dank some dank DMs of BFs and GFs like sipping IPAs together in Denver, Philadelphia. That's the city of brotherly love where bros should be hanging out. That's where GFs and BFs are hanging out. Fired up on that.

That's awesome. So it's nice. It's freaking legit. Yeah, you're doing some good. Yeah, but also, you know, what I'm saying is my perspective. I always want to, you know, qualify. No, I mean, you do it with a lot of humility,

and I respect the fuck out of that. Fucking thank you, dude. I feel like you have that inner confidence where if a conflict comes up, you're like, this is pressure, but babe, we can handle it, and we're going to come out better. Exactly, dude. I guess that's what makes me curious, though, too,

is that, like, can you, if you guys, and I don't think it'll ever happen, you know I love your GF so much. Like, she's been a, not just a wonderful GF to you, but a really wonderful friend of me. Yeah. But if you guys ever did come to a time where you were breaking up, would you maintain the relationship expert label? I think it would. I think I would have to.

And it would just be, it would evolve. It would be, because right now, dude, I've been in, this is, it would just be, it would evolve. It would be, because right now, dude, I've been in, this is, you know, this is a true fact.

This is the one relationship I've been in besides my freaking sixth grade girlfriend, Danielle, dude, who technically we never broke up. She's married now with kids, so that's a little fucked up on her part.

Have you spoken to her about that? No, I haven't spoken, but she's like a dancer in New York now, killing it, drilling it, dude. You know,

happy, living her dreams. Not to be juvenile, but I think you skipped another long relationship you had. Wait, which one? Oh, JT is my first love, dude. No, not that I remember your hand. Oh, dude, yes, dude.

Angela, Pamela, Jill, dude. J-I-L-L. Right there, dude. Yes, dude. I mean, still, you know, still, let me tell you what. My GF goes out of town, and honestly, after a stressful day, there, dude. Yes, dude. I mean, still, you know, still, let me tell you what. My GF goes out of town, and honestly, after a stressful day, yeah, dude, have a threesome. You know what I mean? Does she get jealous of your hand?

No, no, no, dude. I mean, look, that's a healthy part of nature. You know what I mean, dude? But, dude, if the answer to your question. She hasn't done the release? Oh, yeah, of course, dude. Of course, bro. You know, I mean, not getting wild about it.

You know, I'm not, like, at a zoo. You know what I mean? I'm freaking, you know about it you know i'm not like at a zoo you know i mean i'm freaking you know handling business but uh you know no i'm saying like you know like a zoo animal like a out and open like just cranking oh for sure when i crank the monkeys exactly i mean it's either at my it's reserved can maintain to my desk area to like serene vistas or you know 40 year olds in love boning or it's you know just nice quick in the shower done dude you know what i mean dude she'll look at me they go she'll go why where's my conditioner i'll be like you know it's you talking about watching like more wholesome

pornography um yeah it's kind of a influence to me too like i love that i you know i try not to watch any porn once in a while i slip but i've actually maintained pretty good, I call it sobriety. Good for you. And I don't have access to porn on my phone or on my computer, but I have some dirty stories that I emailed to myself from a website. And some of them are like too filthy, and I deleted them completely because I just, I can't be, it makes me feel bad afterwards. Yeah, because I'm just putting two

second thoughts into my head and it's not like horrible stuff but it's like weird cuckolding stuff and it's just it's no bueno for my self-esteem so I've 86 and I'm the stuff I'm watching when I do watch it which is rare is like super like uh it's like an it's a male porn star interviewing a female porn star and it's her just tickling his neck i love that i love that that's great that could be a whole new category we are even like a website we should try and spark a movement where people get amped on genuine love yeah i think so that's beautiful and gentle and sweet and uh involves douglas lube yeah yeah fires you up throwing that out there you know

not to plug him but i love him yeah no one really talks about that in amateur porn where when it's a couple and they're putting out the video together like how much trust they must have with one another yeah i mean i think we focus on what depraved delinquents they are but yeah one of the bros in our fantasy football league shared on the thread a while back. Do you guys remember Heather I Deep Throat? Oh, yeah. I mean, if you are, you know, a teenager with internet access and a male and two hands and eyes, you probably remember Heather I Deep Throat.

Yeah. And Kazaa. And, you know, you would just let it get to 99% buffer, dude, so you didn't have to fully download it. So no evidence, dude. Right. I'm not trying to teach any lessons here. Preview download. And then delete preview download. Thank you. Look for that T1 connection.

Look for that DSL connection. That's what's up. You're a computer expert. And then just derail yourself, dude. Pause addictinggames.com and switch over. Look, it was a dark period, but I was finding myself. Anyway, my dog, they were married married that was a couple oh really yeah yeah nice how great is that yeah it's wonderful that's amazing so sick so sick but what do you

think she's doing now uh it's uh probably got in that article but i didn't get you know much like the videos didn't get all the way through looking right you You know, early release. I think they're still together. Yeah, you think so? And they go out on their boat a lot. I think they probably live in Florida, and I think they go out on their boat, outboard engines. Fire scenario. They take it out to the, what is it called when you're out in the water?

The bar. Yeah. They go to the sandbar. They go to the sandbar. They have a nice time with their friends. And it's Florida, so I don't think anyone's judging them too harshly for their libertine past. past you know i pray to god that they behave as if the camera were there all the time yeah i don't want it to be like one of those times where the camera comes off and they're you

know they go play monopoly or something you know i want them to be like for sure con you know it's like that's their relation i love that and i love that fire scenario of them in miami right now that fires me up but dude you know to answer your question, I don't know what happened. If the earth was turned upside down or I don't know. Right. I'm basically asking you what would you do if an asteroid hit the earth? Yeah, exactly. It's that metaphorical level of impact for you.

Correct. But dude, you always got to have a plan. You know what I mean? If an asteroid hits earth, you got to have your go bag ready. What's my go bag is, is dude i would still like to be considered you know relationship expert because part of a relationship is comes to an end you know and then you gotta find so how many questions do we get from stokers of oh we just broke up and now i want to go meet someone else or take my time so i'd be able to live that and i'd have to

find i'd have to find until you get her back find the stoke. Until you get her back. Exactly. It's all, it's all learning. Let's go, let's go out to the paintball course. And take out the new guy? Or just, or just watch me on the paintball course.

If she, if she, if she'd be willing. That's such a good idea. Yeah. Just be sick. Watching you display kind of like your alpha energy out there. But dude,

you know what? My Jeff is ripping. Is good at activities dude she's taking out my bros and k1 racing on go karts she wins at like board games and ultimate werewolf she's a competitor dude yeah well i mean drills it where well i'm just not good at werewolf have you played that game werewolf you get cards you get rolls and like um if you're the werewolf you have to lie and say you're not the werewolf oh it's i like investigating who is the werewolf but i'm terrible at lying yeah like when i'm the werewolf someone's are you the werewolf, you have to lie and say you're not the werewolf. Oh, that's cool. I like investigating who is the werewolf, but I'm terrible at lying. At being?

Yeah. Like when I'm the werewolf, someone's like, are you the werewolf? I'm like, no. I'm like, yeah, I'm a fucking werewolf. End the game. And then, dude, what I don't like about the game is that, like, it makes you question your relationships with people. Oh, yeah.

Like, I thought Strider was lying to me one time. I was like, you're lying to me. He's like, I'm not lying to you. I'm like, you're fucking lying to me, dude. And after the game, it turned out he wasn't lying to me, and I didn't believe him. Yeah. And he looked at me afterwards.

He's like, dude, I told you. And I was like, I'm sorry, man. Who was the werewolf in that game? I don't know. I think it was like some other dude, this dude Chris or something. Yeah. Nice dude. Sips on some high peas.

I'll check the tape on it i film all the games dude also so julian assange's cat for those of you stokers who don't know julian assange is the guy behind wiki leaks who released a bunch of uh government cables i think they called him that had sensitive material in some of them about like uh where certain secret agents were located so i think he put people's lives in danger. But he also revealed some stuff about dirty stuff the government was doing. And ever since that happened, he's been hiding in an Ecuadorian embassy in London, I believe. And they just revoked his stay. But here's the crazy part.

He has a cat. Yep. What's going to happen to the cat? The cat's also a social media star, sending out fire tweets. Yep. Hot Insta pics. I'm not, they didn't say anything about the stories, but I'm sure they were fire. Oh, guaranteed they were fire.

Probably some hot takes on kibbles and bits and shit. Oh, totally, dude. Some good puns, dude. Yeah. They had some good, you know. Dude, what did he do? Like counter-per-valence. That was it, counter purveillance

yes dude i love that i mean dude look it's just kind of crazy reading that article being like this was in pretty insane like these this guy with the wiki leaks all these agents that are out there and like you know clandestine stuff that the government's invading our rights and everything i literally like didn't remember like any of that type of stuff but i did remember the cat the details yeah yeah that's how just the most insane thing for me was just being like and this is a little bit too of our buddy mike ferrara from college like when his sister would have like a one-on-one philosophy class and he'd be like dude there's a person out there for every person but i was like this is uh it's pretty wild that that's how like the how we operate as people like

we cling on to the cat we love that more than the actual fact there's that Hollywood screenwriting book save the cat and it basically tells you that you can make the protagonist a horrible person but if you have them save a cat in the first act like displaying like humanity that way the audience will be on their side for the rest of the story so there is something to like how people care about animals that can humanize even the worst of people and yeah and murderers start out like sometimes like torturing animals like that guy from the um who's like the uh the hitman for the mob they made a movie with it like oh right yeah the michael shannon movie yeah it was michael shannon i forget the ice man yes the ice man and he would like torture cats as a kid real psychotic

yeah which is so funny though because I think that gets over prescribed a little bit because then like my buddy Robbie would have like a guppy and he'd be squishing his head and then like my uncle would be like that kid's gonna be a murderer he's actually he is a murderer he's in the marines but he's a great guy yeah yeah I don't know if he's killed anybody but he's he's in a line of work where it's possible I just made that connection now. Did he kill the guppies? Yeah, they didn't survive their heads getting smashed off. Oh, yeah.

I thought he was like putting pressure on you. Did he like follow through? And he would say, say uncle, say uncle. Like he would mess around with the guppies and be like, say uncle, say uncle, and then squish their head. And I just remember turning and my Uncle Jim was like, whoa. Whoa. turning in my my uncle jim was like whoa who's whoa you know sometimes we knock on uncle sam but at least he gave that guy a cause something to get behind yeah he put he channeled his energies into a good match quality as david

epstein would call it so why do you think we care about the cat so much is it because the cat's innocent and all this it's an innocent yeah yeah Like my dad's favorite person in our house growing up was our little Bichon Frise toes. Oh, yeah. Because she never disrespected him or was ungrateful. One morning my mom woke up and my dad was going, aren't you just the most beautiful girl in the world? My mom turned around and goes, thank you, Tommy.

And he was talking to the dog. That's amazing. Two small Bichon Frises. Yeah. Oh, my God. Yeah, little cuties. Dude, my dad, he killed the Bichon Frise. He was pulling into the driveway, and it, like, ran under the tire.

And to make it a softer sell for all of us, he goes, I didn't run it over. It had a heart attack right before I hit it. I was, like, eyeballing him. I'm like't i don't think it happens like that dad yeah that's amazing this isn't a cartoon did you have just one we had one and then we got another one okay yeah and now they have two okay yeah now they got two luna and uh coco cute my dad hated the dogs you had a bichon as well oh yeah, yeah. Chula. The dog was supposed to weigh like 8 to 12 pounds. Chula was weighing in at 23 lbs. Yeah, you had a big ass Bichon.

She was on that hip, like the Orange County pumpkin diet. I feed my dog pumpkin. It's filling and healthy. If you feed the dog pumpkin plus seized chocolates chocolates, like it's gonna get huge. Dude, this thing would just move around, dude. Dude, that dog was cute, but tragic death. Yeah, how did it go again? Got scared by thunder.

The power was out. So like couldn't see, freaking just straight up barreled into like a freaking leg of a table, dude. Drilled itself. And you guys had moved the table, right? So like- Yeah, and it was like moved for... The spatial relationship was different.

Yep, it wasn't there, which makes you think, like, it's a smart animal. It usually knows where it's at, kind of. But man, that was sad. I mean, she was old when that happened, like probably 12. So, you know, she lived a very comfortable life, dude. She was eating, like, you know, leftover filet, dude, flank steak. The flank

steak wasn't medium well. She wouldn't touch it, dude. dude i'm like how do you even get flank steak medium you know right dude we had a dog dallion it was like a german shepherd mix so he was just way out of shape did not move well and uh he would just like pee out of his ass all the time really it was gross so we had to like spray his ass with a hose every time he took a dump. Oh, so he'd be like darling sit still Shoot just shoot this hose as asshole. Yeah, and he'd be like like sherry big Our friends the Pankos were like the most hospitable people you go over there They had a fridge with the coldest Gatorade you ever had a packed Pantry with just like all these delicious treats and then they'd give you steak for dinner with like they grilled cheese on top of the steak it was decadent oh as well as they treated us was as bad as they treated their golden retriever they kept it in the garage oh 24 hours a day in total darkness

oh they kept the gatorades out there so you'd open the door to the garage going to grab a gatorade and you just see this dog's eyes pop up and you'd be like you guys just leave her in there they're like yeah we tried to bring her inside she didn't like it we're like how long did you try for they're like a couple hours damn yeah and then that dog ended up running into traffic when i was going for a walk and dying yeah makes sense dude so i'm out of here and you don't you know none of us really know if animals have agency when it comes to things like suicide but sounds like it yeah a golden retriever too that thing's like born to be social yeah if. If you bum out a golden retriever, dude, you're doing something wrong. It was in solitary confinement.

That's a difficult animal to bum out. And that's the mark of a serial killer, too. If you put a golden retriever in a detention facility. Yeah. Oh, man. Solitary confinement. Yeah. I was like, why is your dog in Gitmo?

What does it know about 9-11? Yeah. Yeah. You're like, hey, we're going to adopt you, and you're going to be punished. Just eating goop, dude. Trying to be an agent. Waterboarding the Golden Retreat. Who's your dog's former owner?

Farik Alzu? What the hell's going on here? What does it know? Yeah. It's got multiple papers. He was a cop. The dog was a cop. He just likes to sit in the silence.

He's seen shit out there. He just likes to sit in the dark. What if you shit out there. He just likes to sit in the dark. What if he walked in my garage and he's just like a match and he's lighting a cigarette? Yeah, welcome. Say welcome to the dark. Yeah, he's like Bane. The name's Skippy. I've seen a lot of shit.

Oh, man. That was sick. That was a good silence. Yeah, that was so sick. What else is cracking, boys? Dude, fired up? Me and the gf are heading to tahoe fired up for tahoe legend freaking vegas with the view baby daddy's already got himself south lake south lake baby harvey's of course i'm going into harvey's are you kidding me what's harvey's oh you're staying somewhere else is what the sports's is where the sports book is, the casino. We're staying at this place called the Azure.

Don't know anything about it, but it looks nice online. I stayed at Harvey's in November, and I think I saw Azure from my hotel room. It looked legit. It looked chill? Nice. I mean, I love that town. It's the best, dude. I've only been to Tahoe once, dude, and I freaking was so fired up for my bro's bachelor party, so I'm excited to go up there with the GF, dude,

experience it in a different, dank, quaint way, dude. Maybe take a little drive up to Incline Village, dude. What's going on up there? It's a nice little town, kind of like a Solvangy-type town. Little shops, dude, cruise in there, dude. Maybe pick up an ornament for my GF and I's tree come Christmas, dude. So how do you split the activities? Dude, honestly, that's part of the fun of the trip

is even just planning it with the GF going like all right well the more if we're gonna do water sports you want to get out in the morning when it's glass when it's smooth yeah what do you guys have wave runners either wave runners or fired up or jet skis or kneeboard or like you're gonna do a jet ski a proper jet ski dude wakeboard or i mean what's it called water ski sorry water skiing sorry wakeboard or wakeboarding dude i mean my skill level it called? Water skiing. Sorry, water skiing. Sorry. Wakeboarding. Wakeboarding, dude, I mean, my skill level, it's heavy to get up on that thing. It's tough for me to get up. It's heavy to get up.

I haven't tried it since my legs got stronger, though. The key is to push. Oh, then you're getting up. I know, I got to do it again. Push with your legs. I've never been up. That's what you do. Yeah, you push against the water, and then you pop up.

Kind of counterintuitive. You're like, what? Yeah. I mean, I might even just kneeboard. Dude, that's fun. Stand up on the kneeboard. I kneeboard. That's fun. counterintuitive. You're like, what? Yeah. I mean, I might even just kneeboard. Dude, that's fun. Stand up on the kneeboard. I kneeboard. That's fun.

Yeah, sick. Do surface 360s, pop some airs. Yeah, exactly. Get outside the wake. Dude, you get outside the wake. Oh, yeah. The speed can be. It can get scary outside the wake.

You can clear the wake. Yeah. And dude, that looks. Oh, yeah. That's a massive error. Dude, seeing someone on a kneeboard clear a wake would be hilarious. That's a pretty big error. Yeah.

I mean, you'd have to have the strap thing on. I don't even use the strap when I'm on there. Oh, you don't use the strap? No, I just go for it, dude. Because here's the thing. I can't do errors. That's true. Dude, I've never done errors.

Have you done errors on anything? You can be honest. What about a mountain bike? You've done errors. No, I've never done errors. BMX? I've never got error on that, dude. You've never gotten error on skis or a mountain bike? You've done airs. No, I've never done airs. BMX? I never got air on that, dude. You've never gotten air on skis or a snowboard?

I got a little bit of air on skis. Like speed bump air? Yeah. Like I had a mogul by accident. I almost went down, caught air, landed on one ski, but was able to maintain. Right.

You did that one ski shimmy for a little bit? Yeah, dude. Dude, what can we do to help you get air? I don't know. I just got to get more brave, dude. can we do to help you get air i don't know i just gotta get more brave dude i just gotta start believing myself more but i mean i'll be fired up you know dude my gf she usually beats me down the mountain when we're skiing dude she'll probably you know get outside the wake i'll be on the boat dude you know chilling that's fire we'll be sick

we'll be sick dude she'll get on the jet. She'll get on the jet ski. I'll hop on the back, dude. She'll rip it. She rips on stuff, dude. That's fire, dude. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, she really does. She's a good athlete. Yeah.

Yeah. And, dude, she'll rip it there. Then maybe she'll go get a massage or something, dude, and then I'll head over to the sports book. Harvey's. Already got myself a nice little purse lined up. Going to put some action down on the women's world cup. Oh yeah.

USA all the way. You were meant to talk about that. I know. Oh, that's true. That's true. I don't want to blow our load. Yeah,

dude fired up for, they beat a Spain today. Wow. Yeah. But I heard it was a rough showing. I didn't see it. I heard Rapinoe and, and Morgan are two attackers.

They're not getting loose in space and they're not really creating the kind of scoring chances we need going against France on their home turf in the next game. Oh, yeah, it's in France. Yeah, France has a good team. Les Bleus is strong this year. They are. They had a tight match with Brazil. I watched that.

So they beat Spain, and then? This is now eliminations. Now they're going to go and play. And there's another side, too, with, like, I don't know don't know which yeah i forget he's on the other side and i heard the manager who's had the gig for five years which is in soccer is crazy long um she was like reluctant to pull morgan and rapinoe out even though we got the best depth in the world probably by a country mile so i don't know people are questioning her tactics all will be forgiven if we win the tourney though but we But we had a weak showing today.

That's what I heard. I didn't watch it. That's what I read from a friend. Maybe her thinking could be, look, they need to get out there and jive. You're not going to jive on the bench. You've got to just go and do it. You've got to gel. You've got to keep working through the reps.

And it sounds like they're pretty superior. It sounds like even though at least they're healthy, dude. I heard Alex Morgan almost went down, like had some sort of injury in a game, came out early at like halftime. They were killing the team. Not the Thailand game, but the game after. In group play, we put on some slaughters. I was reading the stats, dude.

Insane. Shots, goals scored. USA had like 18. Goals against, zero. Shots on goal, 34. Shots on goal against, four. Penalty, like corner kicks, like 18. Corner kicks against, like five or something like that.

Are you going to be able to lay down some sweet parlay action? Maybe, of course, you know I'm going to parlay. I might do a futures bet, too. Maybe take the Rams to win the Super Bowl. Oh, you can do a futures? Oh, I didn't know. Yeah, they got futures. That's a new action for daddy. Take rams to win the super bowl or oh you can do a future oh yeah they got that kind

of action that's a new action for daddy take dodgers to win maybe take lakers now that they got ad to win maybe a little la parlay all day you should do some dodgers action then like get tickets to that game yeah oh are you well you can't do like it's only like win it all or what game um yeah because the specific schedule is not out for – Is it out for football yet? The football schedule is out, yeah. It is? But it's week one.

But for the Dodgers, though. Dodgers – But the way they do it is – Does it have to be the same – It's either end of season or like day of playing. Boner jam. I like the – The Lakers messed up their salary cap a little bit.

Like had they waited longer on the ad deal i guess they would have carved up another four million in cap space then now they're gonna hope he waves um and maybe he'll be incentivized to do that because he's got the same agent as lebron so lebron will like hook him up with a part in space jam i heard nice um make up the but then i'm hoping they'll have enough money to get like patrick beverly i love because i don't think they need like a scoring guard they need guys who can fit in with the guys they got yeah they need a shooter and then they need guys who can bring energy and play some d yeah and i love it not demand the ball yeah correct i love those picks and reddick can

stroke it beverly just loves he's a dog yeah yeah he is he gets in your jersey yep free throw line to free throw remember him in durant in that series that was fun that was fun yeah he's a dude and you just know i love guys like that who you know made it just off like effort yeah he's a guy you go to the ymca you see beverly playing the game before you and that team happens to lose you go hey we need one extra yeah because you don't want to be playing against him no that guy will wear you out yeah we need you and even though he's tired he's been running all day he's like all right i got one more in me let's go tenacious then you run seven games did you guys hear about a louis ck performed at the legions of skanks You out. Yeah, we need you. And even though he's tired, he's been running all day, he's like, all right, I got one more in me. Let's go. Tenacious. Then you run seven games.

Did you guys hear about a Louis C.K. performed at the Legions of Skanks Festival in New York? Oh, he did? He got a standing O. No way. Just on coming out. Yeah. I saw a tweet about Louis C.K. I didn't know it was related, though.

Yeah. But somebody was like, if you put Louis C.K. on stage, you don't care about my safety. This is an office safety violation. Yeah, I understand. I think he should be able to perform. I don't know if he should get a standing O just for walking out. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah. A standing O. That's interesting. What else, dogs? I've been bronzing. Yeah. I hit hit newport i got a new soft top my storm blade eight footer it looks good sometimes yeah it's uh it's blue with a striped bottom you know you can get these nice soft tops like the catch surf and stuff i was gonna get a catch surf but it was a little pricey so i went with the storm blade same feel just you know not as not as flashy and i took it out to manhattan beach

yesterday it was nice that waves were weren't you know it was like one to two but uh that thing can catch anything so i was getting some nice waves and then uh yeah hit newport on saturday just bronzed with the gf love it you know what street dude 32 54 where you were at it was 32 love it too yeah right near um sanchez tacos i think yep um dang and uh we were just spraying sunscreen on each other which is like what you want to do when you're in Orange County, you know? Playful and fun. You spray sunscreen. Or playful and useful. You spray sunscreen on your romantic partner. That's what you do when you go to Southern California.

You just douse them with S-screen. Nice. It's the best, dude. You're keeping them safe from those UVA rays, those UVB rays. There's a lot that goes into it, I think. You know, beyond just like, here's some sunscreen. It's like, there's more like emotional goes into it i think you know beyond just like here's some sunscreen it's like there's more like emotional stuff of like protection i'm looking out you know let me get the back of your calf yeah that subtext is romantic as fuck yeah totally there's a lot of care involved

yeah we talked about it for like two hours after we applied oh that's awesome nice you guys just cut it up about it yeah i was like you know well at first i was like i'm really amped on the copper tone um thank you for making that selection and we just got into like the deeper meaning of applying sunscreen to each other dude when my gf saw out on the beach reading dude we were in thailand dude humble brag you'd freaking been to thailand legit dude paquette and we're just chilling on one of these screensaver beaches that just look amazing dude like the water's unbelievable blue the sand's unbelievable white all there are a few palm trees dude me and my gf we lather each other up with sunscreen dude 30 minutes before we get there

take a little dip ruski in the water reapply so we're chilling she's reading i'm hanging out dude i'm scoping the beach i'm scanning it for better shade dude i'm looking around going is there a better palm tree we can be under right now to get max shade and comfort? That's what I'm doing, dude. That's how I'm relaxing, making sure my GF's got max relaxed. I love it. Yeah, dude. Plus, you know, I got a lot of tension, dude.

I don't relax that well, dude. You got your head on a swivel at all times. Yeah, yeah. You're looking to procure safety for you and yours. Thank you. Exactly, dude. But also, procure some freaking dank coconuts. There's dudes that walk around the beach and sell coconuts, dude, that you can just sip straight out of.

Man, coconuts. They got coconuts in Thailand. That's where the main ones come from is Thailand. Really? Interesting. Dude, you know that pineapples aren't native to Hawaii? I found that out, dude. Where are they native to?

They got them in Costa Rica. They got them in Central America. Yeah, it might be Central America or somewhere else. But don't you associate pineapples with Hawaii? Yeah. Hell yeah, for sure. Dude, not even it. Comtree is not even native to LA.

They brought them here. But they took. Totally, dude. They took big time. They took well. Like on American Idol, they made that song their own, dude. I heard they're not going to plant anymore. Oh, really? What's the reasoning? I don't know. Petition to lower amp, dude.

Freaking come on, dog. Give me some king palms. Yeah. You try to get people not to move you or take care of the population? Dude, I read that ocean bacteria colonizes your skin after just 10 minutes of swimming. Really? Yeah. And, I mean, there's some good bacteria in there, but overall they're saying it's not great that our bodies are doing that. Really?

Because I heard there are studies coming out of UCSD that's like, if you expose yourself to ocean water, it's sort of like the elixir of life. Like, you expose yourself to that bacteria and it boosts your immunity. That's why surfers have like a youthful glow. Yeah, my dad was always like, dude, if you got like a cut or like a rash just get in the ocean water yeah i think there's something new in it called vibrio that causes cholera cholera cholera cholera yeah you don't want that it's bad it's a flesh-eating skin infection. Yeah.

It's a bummer, dude. But let me, dude, I mean, I think it's like the Greeks, dude. Everything in moderation, dude. Get in that ocean a little bit. Oh, yeah, for sure. Most of us aren't getting in there enough. And then what do you do? You're going to rinse down with some fresh water afterwards.

You know what I mean? Oh, you're going to take a big shower. Yeah, take a big shower. Take a big shower. Thank you, dude. Shower, shower, shower, shower. Hi, why? And then just take one of those. And then you're going to be feeling good, dude. Like, you can. Thank you, dude. Shower, shower, shower, shower. Hi, why? And then just take one of those,

and then you're going to be feeling good, dude. Like, you can't, you don't, although when we did go to Cabo, we all flew back after swimming in the ocean all day. Didn't shower for, like, probably 12 hours. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah, it didn't feel good.

Yeah. No, you know what? Whenever I go in the ocean water, I'm like, I feel good. I feel like these I feel good. I feel like these enzymes or whatever the fuck are just like, you know, making my body healthy and then my skin is going to be smooth and soft after this. But if I don't shower for a while after, then I start to feel nauseous. So, you know, you got to mix and match.

Yep, yep. You got to spend some time in there, but you got to make sure you hit that shower, start to feel nauseous so you know you gotta you gotta match mix and match you know yep you gotta you gotta spend some time in there but you gotta make sure you hit that shower get that fresh wawa and then you freaking then you'll glow yeah baby for sure for sure that's what's up dude but also like if you heard about stuff like purell and like antibacterial stuff it kills all the bacteria like the good bacteria yeah so it's like detrimental to your health yeah and it creates like a super germ they're like then there's one strong jack bacteria down there that will get you dude they always talk about the super like that's gonna come for you dude i'm like where is it right if you do that the big one's gonna get just chilling under your fingernail dude and it's gonna fuck you up dude what is it like that they say like because

it kills all like the good ones and bad ones. Right. Those germs are always battling each other and stuff. But if you take them all out, the bad dude rises. There's apparently one evil one that's down there that's going to get you. Right.

He's like the Undertaker from WWE. He just comes in. How come it can't be a super strong good one? I feel like there's a metaphor there about wiping out strong dudes from our culture. Right. Fighters. You got to have some fighters.

Yeah. Yeah. You got to have that dude that used to kill the freaking guppies or whatever, dude. Yeah, Robbie. You got to have dudes like Robbie. Yeah, he emailed me. I don't want to represent him as just a straight cycle because he emailed me and he's such a lovely guy and he wrote a really nice thing about my family in the email.

So, I mean, he's a good dude. He just- Did he put magazine cutouts in the email? Kid zinger dude he wrote it he took pictures and copy and pasted it photoshopped par family yeah hello you want to see your mother this is your email he sent it to me in the mail he sent you a riddle yeah yeah he's the zodiac killer now but he's a good guy yeah yeah yeah i'm sure when you meet serial killers like when you meet them you're like nice charming guy yeah oh dude that's how they that's like what they said about ted bundy yeah like dude he was like i'm referencing everyone's like

also dude i mean is it just cool to be like oh he's hot yeah you know i mean like i saw him oh my god he's not that hot right it's like being bad it's like oh you know what i think about ted bundy i think he's hot yeah and someone's like it's like being bad. It's like, oh, you know what I think about Ted Bundy? I think he's hot. Yeah. And then someone's like, oh, you're so naughty. Yeah, it's kind of like an innocuous way to be bad. Totally. Also, I can't believe they let him freaking represent himself.

I know he was, like, studying law and stuff, but, dude, unbelievable. Yeah, I could never do that. No, dude. Yeah, I could never do that. No, dude. I guess this research team, they left a bunch of wallets in 355 major cities across 40 countries to see how many of them get returned, and the majority got returned. Wow. Yeah.

Nice. You got to like that. Did they say which ones did not get returned? Which cities? Yeah, they had a... Where does it look like there was a low return rate? I feel bad saying this, but it's a... Maybe go with the ones that did return then.

Yeah, good call. Nice, dude. Let's be... Yeah, being positive, dude. Freaking, that's what's up, dude. I want to look at this. Yeah. And I think the highest return rate

all was Scandinavian countries. Norway, Netherlands, Denmark, Sweden. It's a happy squad. Dude, they got it figured out over there, I feel. Everyone, like, you look at, like, the happiness per capita. And, dude, they get no bronzing over there. Yeah. The sun's barely up, like, part of the year.

Yeah. But they're just fired up, dude. It's fired up countries. It's because they're just, they're all and you got big dongs and true jacked true yeah and i don't even know anything else about their culture that's all i know yeah i don't know what music they have i know their films are very sad like like and a lot of their books are sad they're big into noir and then they're big into like ingmar bergman movies which are like maybe they're getting that sat out in a

healthy artistic way yeah and maybe they got some fun stuff but it just doesn't make it across the pond but yeah most of the stuff i've seen is like fucking real sad what was that movie that we saw with like maz margdon or whatever dude mads mickelson yeah mads the hunt the hunt that's not really a movie that was a very good movie. It's about like this guy gets ostracized in his community because he gets accused of molestation. But do the impression of his best friend. His friend, dude. He's like...

Oh, it's deeper. It's deeper. He's just like telling them like... I think his name's like Gunther. Take home some leftovers. Gunther. For the five people who have seen that movie, that's spot on. Yeah.

Yeah, you guys are going to appreciate that. And it's like five years after the fact, so. True, true. But I nailed it right there, dude. I freaking drilled it. I was trying to convince a bunch of the dudes to go see that movie, and the synopsis, the review synopsis on Rotten Tomatoes was, The Hunt is an uncomfortable movie that asks uncomfortable questions

and has the courage to face them down. And I was like, guys, let's go see this fucking thing. That's what's up. But it was, yeah, it was all of that. Should we get into the questions, dudes? Let's do it. All right. Hey, Chad and JT,

help a woman figure out why the homies are acting weird. I hang with a group of dudes that all listen to your pod and they introduce me to it. Hella funny. Thanks for keeping me entertained. I'm the only chick in our circle and I've always been one of the guys, which is chill. But recently, all the bros I kick it with have totally flipped on how they treat me. Low key kind of feels like I'm getting kicked out. I have two guesses on why.

Me and one of the boys kissed and then right after they all started acting super strange and excluding me. Around the same time, they found out I've started smoking the green, which is something they're all against. Am I reading into this too much, or did one of these things change how they view me as a bro? I can't figure out why or what to do. Since you both are the masters of advice, give me some guidance. Thanks, Anna. Two very minor things.

Yeah. A kiss and smoking weed I was gonna say there are schmoles and for every schmoles they get together and create a group now she might be the schmole

of this group but that's not necessarily a bad thing because she might be a little bit too legit for this group right like if she sticks out

from them she's smoking green and macking and cheesing. She's sticking out for the right reasons. Correct. If you're sticking out for the right reasons, you still may be a schmole, but you are a dank schmole. Yeah, it's like a level of schmoleness.

It's like you're a schmole in this squad, but you excel over there. Yeah. Everyone has got their home. And people can be fickle. You know what I mean? Like sometimes it doesn't even make sense

why groups turn on certain people. True. Yeah. They just kind of arbitrarily decide. And then I think it normally passes. True. I mean, it's also highly likely that this could just be

a bigger deal in your head than it is in actuality. Because I think we all get a little self-conscious sometimes but um yeah sometimes people are just like i mean when when we were young we would like if a girl broke up with one of the dudes in the crew and that you know that's obviously a bigger deal than what happened here and you guys are friends prior but we would kind of like ice the person out right except one time we did want to go to a game night at one of our buddies exes yeah well she was like the meanest of the exes

yeah she was but dude she could host a mean game she had a lot of very cute friends yeah and she knew that oh yeah and she knew we were vulnerable we were she knew we wanted to hang out with them true yeah true she's smart girl she's very smart i would say um also she shouldn't get down on herself because she hasn't done anything wrong she sucked face and she smoked dank i mean that's legit dudes and that's human nature uh so i would act as if everything's all good being not get down yourself you know if they're trying to poke you from the squad you know for these minor infractions that aren't even infractions they're just basic behavior that people exhibit um then so be it you'll probably learn better and join a much better squad you'll learn more and

join much better squad but for now just I want to get in your dome just act as if yeah just keep doing what you're doing yeah you sound chill you sound super chill yeah yeah and you smooched a dude and you got freaking baked that's what's up yeah what's good guys love the podcast and the positive spin you guys put on the schmoles and troubles of everyday life i'm loving the college life and recently my stoke levels have been at an all-time high. But a little while back, my longtime boyfriend cheated on me, so I fully ghosted him,

went on with my life, and kept my stoke up. It's been a few months, and recently I've been hearing from mutually friends that he's been really down on himself. His stoke is dangerously low, and it's pretty hurt that I didn't seem bummed about the breakup and never gave any closure.

Of course I was bummed, but I'm not going to let that stop me from raging and making me memes. I'm torn between feeling bad for the guy. Cause he's not a complete schmole or being flattered that I'm more than this hard. Do I break the silence and extend an olive branch to the semi schmole and tell him to forgive himself and slap on his rage face? Or will this bring up unnecessary drama and possibly neggy vibes for myself?

Just trying to be my best self and spread positivity even though those who have been douchey even to those who have been douchey hard position would love some advice love you guys claire dude claire needs to go hang out with what was the girl's name from the last one uh last question uh she needs to go smoke a little herb with her dude sounds like this is a fire crew these are some freaking legit anna and claire dude yeah two legit people i mean i'm fired up on this question because dude you're gonna be nice to your ex who's you know you said dangerously feeling down so i mean obviously there's probably something more serious going on there so it's like dude maybe what i would do is reach out you know set a healthy boundary for yourself be like i'm not obviously trying to get back with

this guy but like forgive him be like hey i forgive you i reacted this way because that hurt me but no hard feelings we're moving on you know then maybe he can he can have a release and that's going above and beyond so that raises my stoke about how uh how you want to raise his stoke even though he hurt you yeah it's very empathetic over yeah so you don't have to you don't have to do that but it would be more than nice and super legit of you. For sure. I think she made the healthiest choice too, you know, just cut ties, move forward with her life.

Yeah. And yeah, I think just a quick text to this dude, just be like, what up? I forgive your ass. And, you know, I just thought I just made the healthiest choice for myself and move forward. You know, I'm not going to sulk and cry, you know. Right. She did the right thing. But I think to extend an olive branch, if he's really that down,

it's a nice thing to do and probably will take away some of her. She shouldn't have any guilt, but if she's feeling something like that, then I'll take that away and then she'll be able to move forward. And be prepared. Might come back with more stuff, want to reopen doors, and then tell me how. That's dangerous. In nature, too. Yeah yeah so you you gotta be aware of that but yeah there's probably a way where she could phrase it where she's just like you know hope you're well at the

end of it if you put a hope you're well at the end of it yeah it's like all right we're gonna keep moving so yeah so true all right what's up stokers had myself a lucky friday night and flopped with a chick in her sorority house. Consensually, of course. Good on you. Unfortunately, on Monday morning, I received a Venmo charge of $25 for plan B. She said it was just in case and she didn't have enough in her account at the time. Now I know I did not nut inside of her and I definitely had my helmet on the entire time,

but she is still pressing me on this. I attend a very rich school in Texas, so I know that $25 isn't the end of the world for either of us, but a part of me feels that maybe she floused with some guy on Saturday night as well. The other part of me thinks she is wasting $50 on the pill, but more importantly, damaging her body with it for no reason. Overall, I'm not sure if I should give her $25 for the sake of protecting her wellbeing or covering for some possible schmole who rebounded sloppy seconds after me. Love the pod and would love a second opinion. Fuck Puzio.

I would, yeah, totally. I would give it all the 50. I would say, and if you really want to find out, I mean, maybe you don't want to see her again. I don't know what happened with that or whatever. Maybe it's awkward, but like, look, you know, if you're going to take, if you're going to suck the vine,

you know, there's going to be maybe a little bit of a thorn on there sometimes. It's going to get you, and you've got to pay the price. And even sometimes you see the thorn, and you know the juice, and the plant was good to you, and you want to be good back to this nice plant. So it's like, look, you give her $50. You just said it's not too big of a deal for either of you guys. You give her the $50.

You talk to her, and you say hey you know the most legit thing was like oh it is bad for your body because that pill does fuck up your body so that is legit real concern so be like hey here's the 50 bucks be careful with that thing i'll drive you if you want me to drive you give it an afternoon you know what i mean well then and then how's she gonna remember you if you do that you'll always always be a good memory to her. She'll always think of you as a good guy. Totally. And someone who, you know, when she was feeling bad or vulnerable or scared, went the extra mile to make her feel okay.

Exactly. Never underestimate the power of giving a good gift. It will raise your own stoke. Yeah. And that will help her stoke. And you'll think better of yourself, too. Correct. Yeah.

And it's not like she's going to be like, oh oh i need to date this guy now he drove me it's like well then that's a bridge you cross when you come to it and you're like i'm not trying to date you i'm just like and then being worried that she like boned another dude yeah it's a little bit of like storytelling in your head don't assume the worst yeah and why do you care if you just had a one-night stand with this girl and you're amped on it and you don't want to date her who cares if she went well no but he feels like he's being taken for a ride. She's like, oh, he thinks that she thinks he's a mark. And I think that's

it's too much. That'll mess you up. But it's 50 bones. 50 bones isn't going to break the bank. Yeah, I wouldn't, on his part, I wouldn't assume the worst. I would just pay up. And it's the pill. You know, and then move forward.

Hopefully it's by a nice smoothie shop. You get yourself a dank smoothie or something, dude. Treat yourself to something nice. Dude, just have sex and don't nut, dude. That's baller. For sure. You know what I mean? Just like, that was tight.

You know what I mean? Just retain it. Yeah. Just straight up, hold it in later forever and i go home and i take care of me no you don't know until you're like 90 at the end yeah just one oh you become that dude from last crusade for 70 years yeah and then you just die you come in your entire body in person and then the skin that's left just dies exactly dude because i heard to some guy he's like what are you gonna say what are

you gonna say do you come no i held it i'll see you yeah yeah later like i forget what this is from it's probably a movie i forget but he's like describe your best sexual experience and it wasn't it wasn't the orgasm yeah right it's everything that's built up so then by not nutting until you're 90 you're really encapsulating that yeah what was all built up forget what that's from i want to say like love actually but it's not love actually what up stoke gods long time listener of the pod me and my squad are pretty tight and have all been friends since kindergarten we're almost done with high school and i've realized we have a schmole in the crew he always lies and gets defensive when we call him out on it and whenever

we bring girls around he tries to slide in he's always been a hose before bros guy but we can't get rid of him since he's been in our crew since day one that's it yep they're asking like how to poke him yeah i think it'll happen naturally if you're done with high school. There's already going to be kind of like a natural splintering because you guys are going to college. And then when you guys come back, you just do the soft estrangement, to quote Amos from the pod. And for every five text messages you send to the other bros, you just give him one.

And then over the course of a couple years you'll just naturally kind of go in your own directions so true dude and he might already be thinking the same thing too yeah he might go to he's gonna go to a liberals art school you know vassar you know colgate i don't know nothing gets those schools maybe he goes to those schools meets a new crew there you know what i mean right then he's got his own crew and who knows what they're into or maybe he's meant to be crew list some of those guys who are big on like poaching girls from their buddies they're just kind of meant to like shack up with a girl and just not have as many bros true like camper dudes i feel like there's camper dudes or like the dudes that

are all about hashtag van life they get a dank gf and they don't even really have a crew they just cruise around yeah they have people who have the same interests as them. Yes. That they do stuff with. Yes. But it's not like bros. Right. Yeah.

Like they'll all go like, you know, they'll like, all right, we're going to meet in Big Sur. We'll spend like one night in Big Sur. Right. But then like we're going our own, like you guys are going to go wherever and we're going to cruise down to San Diego. College is the great equalizer. Yeah.

College. Yeah. You figure yourself out, dude. Like our buddy JD, dude. And not that he's a schmole or like a, we'll try to slide in. He's like the best, most legit dude ever. But like, and honestly, dude,

like he is, we still consider he's part of the crew, dude. And it's like, but he might not consider us like the crew or something. He's probably just like, hey, I'm doing my thing. He might not even think about it. Yeah, yeah. His headspace is just like, all of our headspaces, I mean, have changed, but we've maintained the idea

that there's a crew and that we're all boys. And then I think JD just, that wasn't as important to him. And he's still a lovely guy, but it's just like, I mean, he only lives like half a mile from me and I call him once a year. Yeah. but it's just like best guy he only lives like half a mile from me and i call him once a year yeah and he has the best form in olympic lifting i've ever seen incredible it's unreal his body's like built for olympic lifting dude his his proportions he's so jacked just like not too long you watch that guy do a freaking you know clean and jerk it's amazing all of his athleticism was just remarkable i mean his legs were so strong he was so fast he's so coordinated you wouldn't

even think he'd be good at basketball he was good at basketball because he had such quick hands yeah he couldn't dribble on him yeah but you ran him down one time i did ballet skills dude was back then they knew dude you gotta go get a chevy suburban out of gp dude and some guys are faster when they're chasing something, you know? Amen to that. Seabiscuit style. Got to lock in. Wise masters of Stoke, I am but a humble bro from the Midwest regions of the great nation. I need help with my current situation.

My high school crush has come back from college for the summer, and she's finally single and has come to my side as a summer fling. However, she leaves for college in only three weeks. We have been hot and heavy ever since she has gotten back. But before we put labels on anything, should I hold back my emotional depth or should I go full on and invest in a long-term relation? She's been my dream girl for some time now, but I know I'm a victim of over-romanticizing.

However, this girl and I have a seemingly mutual feeling. Should I stand my ground this summer or go for gold? Thanks for the wisdom. Keep on doing what you're doing. I hope you the best i hope the best bushy bushy bushy that's my nickname it sounds like a john cusack movie waiting to happen dude he's in the midwest too i just kept hearing that song that like peter gabriel song what is that song do? In Your Eyes? Not In Your Eyes. It's another. Salisbury Hill.

Yes, Salisbury Hill. That's it, Aaron. What a legend, dude. Sub a dub on Salisbury Hill. Dude, I just picture him. I saw a boy, he had a voice. Yep. Great song.

Fire song. That is a good song. I just picture him cruising through. You know the cicadas are humming in the background. You're driving in your mom's minivan that you take to college and you know the love of your life's about to pack up and go to the train station psych she's probably at midway airport had a nice deep dish at giordano's she's getting on a plane at southwest she's going wherever she goes to school and you gotta stop her before she gets on that motherfucking plane but how does that story normally end they fall in love, so you say go for it. Yeah, go for it, dude. You know I want you to go for it, dog, because guess what?

If you go for it and you fall on your face, then you went for it, dog. Right. And if you go for it and you succeed, then you get the fruits of a dank GF, and then it's blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. What's that? That's going down. And also it's enjoying yourself, but mainly it's blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. I'm the girl you love. You got good tongue action. Thank you, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. I'm the girl you love.

You got good tongue action. Thank you, dude. Yeah, really fast. Thank you. Yeah, yeah. You're like a Spaniard. Yep. Also sometimes stiff.

The dart. Nice. X-rated. X-rated. That's a viewer bit only. I've never seen your dart, dude. Yeah. I don't mess around.

That was awesome. Yeah. Your neck is like. Yeah, you're like a freaking rooster. Yeah. Wait, can I see it again? Yeah, of course, dude. You can check smart dude. Yeah, I don't mess around. That was awesome. Yeah, your neck is like... Yeah, you're like a freaking rooster. Yeah. Wait, can I see it again? Yeah, of course, dude. You can check it out.

For those listening in their morning commute or anything like that, really what I'm doing is, you know, maybe cocking my neck back to about, you know, four and a half inches, really keeping it on a level plane. Yeah, there's no tilt. No tilt. So erect tongue and really just... Cross a direct plane. Yep yep and darting there's not

too much force but it's like enough where it's like very sensual yeah and it's something that you use very very limited very limited you know what i mean so when you dart will you go for like four minutes or like just like no no no no not a no. Not heavy repetition. Less is more. Right. Less is more. So, like, what's your... And I'm no expert. I'm just saying. Everybody's different.

You know what I mean? I'm just saying, you know, if you catch her on that plight from Southwest, you might be able to explore that, you know, if you haven't already. If you don't mind going there, you don't have to. Yeah, what's up? What's your normal routine? Do you shake it up or do you have like a move I feel like you got to

you know we all have our normal ebb and flow but you got to try to just kind of get out of it you know I think like you just got to see what comes to you you know what I mean in the moment you improvise but it's improvised but it's a series of the same moves you know what I mean

like in an improvised scene how do you establish your information? There's a who, what, and where. You know, if you're enjoying in the act of making love, there's blah, blah, blah. There's a dart. You know, there's rotations. I don't want to get too blue. I don't want to get too blue. But, you know, we went there.

We did. No, I kind of. Yeah, that was great. You dove in. Rotations. Side sweeps. And, I got it. Yeah, that was great. You dove in. Rotations. Side sweeps. And you're saying it's a dynamic environment. Like it changes based off the reactions and sensibilities and proclivities of your partner.

Of course. No question. No question. It's a wicked environment, as they call it. Wicked? Wicked. Oh, right. David Epstein was telling us a kind environment is where it's like the same set of variables every time.

And a wicked environment is where the variables change. Right. Space. Is there like a move where you're like, all right, this is, I'm going for gold right now. Get ready for some darts, babe. I mean, sometimes it's darts, sometimes it's not. You know, you just got to mix it up. I love it.

Yeah. All right. Back to the question. Yeah. sometimes it's not you know you just gotta mix it up I love it yeah I was so captivated by his dart I didn't mean to go that deep but I was just like yeah like he's so fast with his tongue and then like that your tongue so erect with that dart I was like wow like this is a maestro over here like a freaking Mozart of the bean it's true but my Gf might be like all right did she listen she'll listen uh yeah but this type something you skip this one don't worry sorry wise masters of stoke i'm but a humble bro from midwest regions of this great nation i need

help with my current situation my high school crush has gotten has come back from college for the summer and oh i just read this one um yeah what are you guys thinking is he going for it are you guys on board with him going for it dude i think you should go for it go for the gold baby you know take risks life is all about taking risks and going after your dreams do not hold back i mean you could suffer some you know heartbreak but at least you went for it and you don't have those regrets. Go in there. Have your own rom-com. Charge through security. Knock out a TSA agent for love.

And then hopefully you two can apply sunscreen together. Yeah. I mean, I think the numbers are stacked against you. I think most of us, we end up getting hurt. But you can't avoid it. You just got to go in headstrong and just say, come what may. Every relationship, every potential relationship is a learning experience. You can't avoid it. You just got to go in headstrong and just say, come what may. Yep. Every relation, every potential relation is a learning experience.

I think that's how you got to approach it. You're like, I'm learning so much right now. Right. Maybe I should not charge through security this time. Exactly. But I'm telling you to do it for this. But then you do. Yeah.

What up, my Sultans of Stoke? I've run into a pickle that's wreaking havoc on my Stoke that i desperately need advice on from the most stoked bros i know i just recently got home from vacation from probably the nicest place i've ever been to san diego i had the time of my life with three bros and thought my stoke tank was at its limit and couldn't be affected by anything one number one night in particular i met a beautiful betty at a bar and we just hit it off we hit it off like we were soulmates i've never vibed with the girl so well as I did with her. We both shared an absolutely legendary night. When the bars closed, her and I walked to Pacific beach and had sex in the sand. When the sand became uncomfortable, we then Ubered back to my Airbnb where I had to break into my, where I had to break in by climbing

through a barely open second floor window because my bros had the one key and were passed out and had sex again. This was an amazing night for sure, but she left the next day and I'm extremely saddened to think I'll never see her again. I felt more than a one night stand with her. We kept in touch via Snapchat and she feels the same way about it as I do. She wants me to come visit her in Central California, but I live on the other side of the country. So it's not practical to think that we could form an actual relationship. What should I do? Should I continue talking to her daily and continue building my emotions for her in hopes that we will see each other again someday? Or should I just dust off my hands and call it what it is?

The girl is perfect for me, and I've never said that about any other girl in my 24 years of living. Please pass some sage advice down to me because this is just killing my stoke. Thanks, bros. Boom, clap, and jump. Wow. Climbing up on Salt Street Hill. Beam, beam, beam, beam. Same thing.

Dude. I don't know. This one's a little bit beam. Same thing. Dude. I don't know. This one's a little bit different. I don't know. I don't know. That's what I thought too. Different? Yeah.

I want them to go for it. They're on different sides of the country. But different expectations. I met a girl one time when I was at a wedding in Florida, and then I didn't think I was going to see her again because she was gone from my hotel room when I woke up. But then she hit me up on Facebook, and I flew out to Florida to see her. R her rented a car drove up to west palm beach oh

pumping the tunes and um yeah we boned a lot but we had an awful weekend i mean we just did not get along i think the pressure of me going out there kind of freaked her out yeah and she was really awkward when we were just hanging out and then she also just like kept making me hang out with like dude friends of hers. And I was like, I don't want to do this, but I did. And then, but you know,

I don't regret any of it. It was a fun experience. Yeah. And I met a really nice couple that I had lunch with every day. He was, the guy sold a house fans and he was lived in North Carolina and him and his wife were just delightful. Love that.

So you're saying visit her, but maybe not look for a relationship yeah i would just visit her and like it's the same thing they were saying like you don't know what's gonna happen so don't don't be bummed out if it doesn't go great just be like you guys are saying just living your life like the best could happen love that throw darts at the wall yeah tongue darts at the wall dude also this darts at the wall. Dude, also, this is a scenario. Correct me if I'm wrong, legend. If AOL Instant Messenger would be very, very valuable in this scenario because.

Oh, yeah. But maybe you become email buddies. But, dude, the best part about AOL Instant Messenger, because coming out of high school, I had a crush on this girl, and we would AOL Instant Message. And it was so easy because it wasn't as like heavy as a text message. Wasn't home an email. It's like,

what am I? I'm insane. Going to send you an email or let alone pick up the phone and dial. Is there something that's like, is that like what Instagram DMS are kind of like, just, but is that more personal? Like an Instagram DM?

Cause I'm trying to think he's like, how do I keep in touch with this girl to then lead up to a trip? I think, I think he's ready to go. He's touch with this girl to then lead up to a trip I think I think he's ready to go he's just got to plan the trip yeah she's down you're saying like what's the best way to have low-key yeah long-range communication somebody I mean I I had with one girl I she's really sweet we would talk on Facebook Messenger okay just fine I think it kind of evolves naturally between each one's different you know I think it's the grand yeah DM Instagram DM is pretty fire. Whatever you get.

You can send photos. You can send videos. You can just type stuff. You can send posts. You can send GIFs, all that kind of stuff. See, because that's where my relationship expertise, not to, you know, pat myself on the back, is my GF and i've been dating for quite some time now so give the worst advice oh dude when i was like on hinge or bumble strider's advice what was he just like be honest dude just let her know how you feel dude you love her you say you love her i like

you i want to take you out of this girl be like so you seem pretty funny are you funny and strider be like tell her that um you can be funny when the moment calls for it. And that you're actually pretty hungry on Wednesday. And that you'd love to go get a deli sandwich with her. I'm like, what? He's like, that's what I would say. And then he would go, I don't know what I'm talking about. Yeah.

No, I don't even know if that's what he told me to do. But I just remember every time I'd sit there on my phone and I'd tell Strider, tell me what to say. And then he'd start telling me and I'd start typing it. And I'd just look at him and be like, I can't write this. And he was like, yeah, I wouldn then he'd start telling me and i'd start typing it and i just look at him like i can't write this and he was like yeah i want to write that either dude i'd be saying it i'd be seeing your face react as i'm saying it and then i'm like i have to finish this sentence and i don't want to but i've started it and it was just it would be the worst advice and you know what i've noticed you going out this is like a separate point but going

out with uh our now that i'm in a relation going out with our dogs who are not in a relation, dude, it is so hard to meet somebody. Like at bars, it's like impossible. Like, I don't know if it's just an LA thing, but if you go up to girls at bars, like most of the time they don't want to talk to somebody. And then on dating apps, like you can match with 20 people. You might go on a date with like four of them.

That's too big of a ratio. You might go on a date with two of them. And then what are the chances you're going to like this person? They're're pretty slim you know what i mean it's just hard to meet somebody true it's hard because it's also it's like all in your face but it seems so unreachable yeah it's like there's a you know those like walls those uh invisible fences for dogs yeah it's like you have one of those collars on you're just like hitting that fence you're like what can i get through here?

Yeah, and what you want is right on the other side of it. Yeah. Dude, I was saying it's like an entrapment with all the lasers. Like if you actually get to the diamond and meet someone you like, you gotta go through like an impossible grid. It's tough, dude.

That's why I think the best thing you can do is just like focus on building like friendships and relationships like that and it will grow out your social circle and you'll just meet more people by virtue of that but if you go out like looking to like meet someone yeah it's fucking hard it's palatable that energy coming off on you is palatable when you're not that desperate but it's like the intent is known yeah quite i don't know if it's ever been harder yeah which which is also comes back full circle you met this girl you gotta go for it you guys have something going on you got it yeah yeah sure dude yeah i uh whenever i'd be going out with dudes to be like all right let's talk to

some chicks tonight and i'm like oh yeah dude it's so stilted and awkward i hate that plan like because they're just like what's up michelle this is chad here and i'm like hey like this sucks yeah it's awkward i don't want to like watch you guys well you feel like you're auditioning yeah totally totally you like walk up to these people you're like i hope i don't get rejected you know what and there was times in my life where i could just do it and like not feel the pain of it but like basically i had like one summer in my life where it all came together and I was actually good at like talking to, to women I was interested in. And then I think it was because how cool I was actually exceeded how cool I thought I was.

So I was in this real sweet spot where people liked me, but then that immediately went to my head. And then I've just been on a cold streak ever since then. You know, I go back to episode 73 or something where Stryer's like, do karaoke. Yeah. Just get out there, do karaoke. Yeah. Just get out there, do karaoke. Love that. Lay down some fire songs.

Yeah, and all that is is just meaning don't get caught up in just going out to just meet somebody. Go out and have a nice time. Yeah, but it's tough. Put yourself out there, but don't force it. It's a tough walk. No, but you're right. You're right. You got to go have fun.

You got to go have fun, and then you got be open and then i love the people you're with yeah yeah go on the dance floor and just be goofy you know just like this and you see a girl that you might like just start goofing it up and then maybe if she joins in you're like all right i feel something here there's a spark let me throw a fucking dura flame on that and then you just you know and then that turns in to tongue darts yeah yes yes for sure yes for sure it all goes back to the tongue gracious lovers dude we want stokers gracious can i see the tongue dart again of course dude well when you were doing the shot collar let me give you one real quick when you were doing the shot collar move with the dog stopping i almost paused everything and i'm like that was the movement oh really all you gotta do is just right all you

imagine you're a dog you're excited your owner just came home it's gotta be more firm yeah i just i just had brisket for dinner and you can smell it you got it you got it i'm tongue-tied dude oh dude why is it drooping down like that dude all right i don't mean to shame your tongue yeah i'm getting shamed. I mean, dude, you know what I mean? Yeah, no, that's solid. Yeah, that's good. Wait, wait, wait.

That's good. Yeah, that's solid. Yeah, that's, yeah, dude. Yeah. Yes. Your tongue turns down. You gotta flip it up. All right, I gotta admit something.

I was tongue-tied. I got that shit cut, so my, yeah. For sure. Not to say that that's not for sure for sure a slight on my abilities you know downstairs i know i know for sure yeah you just got different moves dude yeah maybe the dart isn't your go-to move or it's even in your arsenal you got something else i'm gonna go home practice this and there's more than one way to dart correct yeah next time you're on next time you're on i'm gonna you know like i'm gonna tongue dart through the drywall yeah that's how i dart that's how i'm built like every pitcher has a different release every pitcher does something different you know like you have your own techniques yeah

there's standard motions you go through but you make it your own yeah all right dudes let's get into it chad who is your you Chad, who is your, you ready? Yeah. Who is your beef of the week? My beef of the week? Well, this pod, I believe, is coming out either on 4th of July or the day before. So this is America theme. My beef of the week is with England, the biggest beef in this nation's history.

Dude. Redcoats, what up, dudes? I am beefing with you right now suck it we declared our independence and now you guys are separate from us and you guys can eat a dick back then i like you now um yeah i'm all about taxation is my representation you know general cornwallis nice name dickweed yeah you know fuck you dude um yeah i just you know general corn wallace nice name dick weed yeah you know fuck you dude um yeah i just you know i'm all about taxation i'm all about representation i'm all about you know america america first we bring bud heavies to the table we freaking grill hot dogs and hamburger patties and that's because we squashed our beef with you england so um i don't have much more to say that you know everyone's aware of this beef i'm just grateful we had guys like

mel gibson come through in the clutch and defeat the redcoats when they came in hot you know they were like the freaking you know they were the top dog we were the underdogs and we were like we have grit we have power you know that you don't know about yet because you think we're just a bunch of farmers with pitchforks but you know what our muskets have epic firepower and they're gonna blow a hole right through your nut bag what's up that's what's up dude that's legit dude i would join your militia after something like that thank you thank you taxation baby so stratter who is your beef of the week dude my beef of the week is an unknown dude um my gf and i were having a dank little um breakfast dude um from her work she's on a little bit of a break dude and i had sometimes you know i've been working a lot of

weekends now so i had a little weekday off so dude we were hitting a nice dank little brunch spot and uh some of that would be too packed on the weekend, so we're really taking a nice advantage of no line and enjoying ourselves. And, dude, I don't know. For the bros outside SoCal listening and ladies, we've been having some pretty strange weather where it's, like, super misty and cold. They call it June gloom out here. Yeah.

And then later in the afternoon, around 1, but it seems like even later now, like 2 or 3, the sun comes out and you're like, oh, this is a standard, classic, legit SoCal day. And my GF and I are eating outside, having a dank little brunch. And then my GF wants to borrow my jacket. Some guy's like, oh, yeah, it's cold outside. So much for like the global warming because of like one weather climate right now. And I'm like, what are you talking about, dude?

I didn't say anything in the moment. My goal is to not address that and just get to the moment like, what are you talking about, dude? I didn't say anything in the moment. I'm not, you know, my goal is to not address that and just get to the moment like, oh, yeah, totally. It's kind of chill. We're putting on a jacket. The globe's heating up. And I'm like, I don't want to get political or any of that, but I'm like, that joke is the worst.

That's my beef is with that joke. Maybe not even that dude, but when that joke of like, oh, the climate's not changing because it's cold right now it's like what are you it's and shaming my girlfriend for being cold which is like a weird like i don't like she obviously doesn't get upset about that no one does but it's like well putting a jacket on like who cares right and we weren't talking at all before that i think he just wanted to hang out so part of me i was like all right the guy wants to just kind of talk to somebody or something yeah but i was like dude and some people some dudes when they talk to ladies like they just want to talk to a lady but

their brain goes into like like i'll even see it with myself like if i'm watching a female stand-up and she says something i don't agree with i have a stronger impulse to like respond to her and be like well actually than i do with like dudes yeah you know what i mean yeah like there's just something in my man brain that's like, I like this girl, but I got to tell her that I feel differently. Right. It's true.

Wow. I'm bummed to hear about the beef, but I'm fired up on that brunch. Oh dude. Are you kidding me, bro? They have some special going on and eggs of Benny dude. I do.

I was thinking about eggs, Benny, where they don't usually serve eggs, Benny and dude, kind of like a surf spot right now. I'm not naming the brunch place i went to because i want to keep going all right is that unchill not just to share that is that unchill no all right because dude i love this spot dude it's my it's our spot that's nice of you to think it's unchill you know what i mean it's like dude that's our spot but um holidays dude we split a nice little french press if people start running out

of eggs benedict spots and then you still keep it a secret that's messed up yeah that's messed up but there's other eggs bennies out there and dude you'll be happy to know it wasn't any canadian bacon this was good old american bacon but dude i'm not a big bacon guy that's you're so funny too because you try to like you're being more candid about it now than you typically are because you true you don't like bacon. I don't like pork. I'm not a pork guy. Bacon's probably my favorite pork meat.

But you don't like bacon. Correct. But you tell people you like bacon. I do. I've also told people I've caught air. Yeah. But it's good you're being honest now. That's what matters most.

That's true. Because this is on the record. And you guys are bringing the best out of me right now. Making me have integrity. And that's what good bros do. For sure. Legit. There's,

there's, you know, better things than air and bacon. True. Um, I don't know why I just said that, but a few things. All right.

My beef of the week is, um, with, uh, fedoras. Ooh. Ooh. Yeah.

Cause I, one time when I was like, uh, going through a rough patch i went to this dude who uh was a life coach and i was i was talking to him and i was like yo i've done some things i'm like really embarrassed of i was like do you think i'll ever get past the shame and he's like dude i've done so many embarrassing things and i've gotten past the shame and then i scanned his room and i saw he um had a photo where he was wearing a fedora and i was like yeah i don't trust you anymore i was like you should have shame over that fedora so yeah maybe the kind of like maybe the way that you're gonna make me feel absolved from what i did isn't the direction i should be heading so yeah i just can't have a life coach who wears a fedora. I agree, dude.

That's my beef. Because where's the authenticity of a fedora for that guy? Who wears fedora? Like old dudes? And I don't even know where that came from. Like it was big when they were growing up. Yeah, detectives, Italian dudes. Fedora, is that an Italian word?

Right. Michael Jackson. Yeah. Otherwise, like what you're doing is you're making a statement when you're wearing you're wearing that dude so yeah i don't know all right chad who is your babe of the week my babe of the week is the statue of liberty nice guys there's nothing better than coming to this country and seeing a fucking babe holding up a torch yeah you know she every time i go to new york i see the statue of liberty out there and i'm like what up you're a fucking babe you know you're welcoming new people newcomers into

this country with poise and a great crown and a cool green color you know it's like you're you're you're colored by the salt of the osh which is legit you know i guess she used to be bronzed but now she's green and you know what people would expect me to say i wish she was still bronzed but i like that she's green nice she's being who she is that's what happened dude that's the environment so thank you for being a beacon of freedom and liberty in our country and um i think a special shout out to the french for building your ass. And I love you. Dude, maybe the French will build the Paul Walker statue.

Because that's pretty much what you want for the people of San Clemente to experience that chillness. They're paddling out. They see that. Some dudes are rolling in from a dinghy coming up from Newport or Cabo or whatever. And how do you not get fired up? Or people brand new to the country. Yeah. And that's the first thing they see.

How do you think we should break it to the French? Like, ask them, like, should we, like, we like offer them like a bunch of baguettes or i think we make them a statue of gerard de pardieu nice from sexy beast yeah no what about sexy beast what about marion cotillard no ben kingsley isn't he in that yeah isn't the other guy no ray winstone that's ray winstone would marion cotillard be a good statue of liberty for france oh yeah for sure she's lovely yeah no question an actor balls off no question or the dude from patriot i forget that actor's name but the dude who plays like checky yeah i love that yeah oh yeah he's good love that yeah and he's like you have a bad guy from kiss

the dragon there's time for diplomacy diplomacy Dragon. There's a time for diplomacy. Diplomacy is dead. There's a time for diplomacy. Diplomacy is dead. Yeah. You have kids and he just looks at them and trots away. He's like, French. Yeah. When he names his boy Gabriel in the end.

Yeah. Yes. They become pals. Yeah. The ghost, Benjamin Martin. Legit. Strider, who is your babe of the week? Dude. Post Benjamin Martin.

Legit. Strider, who is your babe of the week? Dude, never has the decision been easier for me for who is my babe of the week this week than when my GF found this dank credenza, dude, on Craigslist that they have at West Dome. Dude, at West Dome, it's like almost like 1300 bones with shipping, dude. That's like two parlays. She found this dank dude over in altadena we take a nice little trip we make a freaking day of it dude we stop by the cheese

dank factory split some avocado egg rolls dude we pick up this freaking credenza from this legit good energy home we pull up this dude named mike's chilling on his porch sipping a lagunitas ipa i'm like already feeling good vibes dude he's got some got some ink. He's legit, dude. His wife's legit. She's got some ink, dude. They got two kids. They're like, look, we're just trying to offload this thing. We're changing things up. Like, dang, dude. He helps me put it in the car. Dude, it's got good freaking marble. It's got freaking dank wood. My GF's been eyeballing this for a while. She got a dank deal for it. More than half off. And dude, so just so fired up. And honestly, dude, it really does make the

room come together in our apartment so the vibes are good so babe of the week my gf no question boom fire dude love hearing that no credenza i didn't even know that word until you started posting no dude i just found out about it dude i found out about it when my gf showed me and dude now i'm all about everyone should get a credenza for sure dude they have like they look dank and they serve a great purpose dude you store stuff put legit things in there and just really is nice good energy i don't know yeah dude my baby of the week is um pb with a t pretty boy with a tan um dominican republic the country has been in the news lately for uh bad reasons a lot of American tourists have died there. Although I think the head of tourism in the Dominican Republic says if you get 2 million

visitors and nine people die, that's actually statistically normal, but whatever it is, they're getting some bad press. So I got to speak to my experience I had when I went there as a boy, uh, I went there with my parents and my dad was busy with work most of the time, but my mom's no wallflower. So she went out raging. And one of the best friends she met was this dude, PB with a T pretty boy with a tan. I called my mom to try and figure out what his name was. She couldn't remember, but basically he worked for Cisco and

was there for business and they went out partying and he saw a beautiful girl at the club. And I remember this meet cute differently. I thought I was the one who went up and talked to the girl first. Like I thought he weaponized me as a seven-year-old to be cute and that's how they met but I guess it was my mom went up to her at a club and Turned out the woman was from Colombia like my mom from bar and Kia my monster Medellin and my mom hooked them up next day We had rented a boat. They come on the boat with us then the guy's supposed to go back with his Cisco colleagues to the states He stays with us for another three days so he can extend the stay with this lovely lady. Calls my mom a month later when we're home

and says, guess what? I proposed to her. Oh my God. So then my mom, trying to share in the excitement, tries to call the Colombian woman who's back in Colombia. And I guess she came from a very Rich and proud family in Barranquilla my mom told me the Barranquilla rich

They don't like when outsiders get into their inner circle So my mom calls her mom picks up and my mom's like hola como estas? Hey is your daughter there? I heard she's marrying my friend pretty boy with a tan and the mom goes they are not getting married. Whoa and then She hung up the phone. So I tried to ask my mom if they got married. My mom says she doesn't know, but she figures they didn't. I like to believe they did. Yeah.

And, you know, pretty boy with the tan, you were a cool dude. Really the babe of the week is my mom for just teeing it up so fat. No question. That's all I was going to say, dude. There's nothing like that, teeing it up. My mom was just teeing it up, dude. She laid the scores teed up she wants to bring people together dude you know what i like to believe is that cisco dude and that babe from uh what part of columbia barranquilla barranquilla they're in miami right now just cruising yeah board engine maybe at the bar harbor they don't

did the family come to accept him of course he sounds like a legit any dude that's going to spontaneously stay after a business trip it's the notebook with a foreign twist maybe they're hanging out with heather that guy deep throat oh that'd be awesome yeah yes they're the same bar party meeting at the sandbar yeah they're wearing like you know uh freaking coconuts as bras yeah oh that yeah for sure and as their board shorts yep just half a coconut covering your dode legit all right chad who is your legend of the week uh my legend of the week is uh american flag bud heavies you know I love a bud heavy. Typically I go for a bud light but when it's 4th of July I'm going to go for a bud heavy. And I wanted

to have an American flag emblem on it. I want that on the can. Honestly there's nothing more beautiful I think than a 30 rack of American flag bud heavies. They're legendary and they deserve to be commended at this beautiful time of the year. So I don't think I can say much more than that.

For sure, dude. It's understood. It's a beautiful love song to a beautiful thing. Strider, who is your legend of the week? Bros, this is the first time I'm going to do this. And this is kind of crazy but my legend of the week is chastity dude chastity is my gf's yoga instructor at yoga vibe dude today she subbed for ben dude who usually does the lunchtime flow and i saying this, that Chastity is my freaking legend of the week

because I've never seen my GF so freaking just stoked. She came back so fired up, so loose. Literally, I see her. I'm like, you're glowing right now. This is incredible, like more than usual. And she goes, Chastity, I love this girl's flow. She does it right. Yoga flow is freaking, Yoga 5 is walking distance from the apartment. And I'm like, dude, anybody who's going to raise my GF stuck like that, straight up legend in my book, dude. Chastity for bringing it with the flow.

Nothing against you, Ben, bro. I'm sure you bring it too. But chastity, I got to go. Now I got to go with my GF and experience this together, dude. So I'm fired up for that. And I'm novice yoga. I'll use a brick.

I don't care. A blanket if I have to. So I'm fired up, dude. So just bringing it, dude. For sure. So I'm fired up for that. And I'm novice yoga. I'll use a brick. I don't care. A blanket if I have to. So I'm fired up, dude. So just bringing it, dude. Nice. Just raising stoke, you know. So that fired me up, dude. Nice, dude.

I love that. My legend of the week is inspired by the film Moneyball, which I watched last night with my GF. And she was getting tired towards the end and kept falling asleep. And then I'd just be watching her. And then she would wake up and she'd be like, don't watch me sleep.

And then I'd do my Australian accent accent it's a three-hour drive um and then uh but she loved it it's a hard movie not to love I think it's Brad Pitt's best performance but I was inspired to name another baseball GM uh as my legend of the week because of that film that's Theo Epstein dude so Theo Epstein takes the principles of moneyball which is you know putting more value on on base percentage uh instead of batting average and just you know letting the numbers uh dictate what the team is more than the eye which I think is a smart way to go although maybe it went too far in that direction but uh he takes over for the Red Sox they've got the long running curse the Bampino haven't won a title in a hundred years it's just terrible heartbreak after terrible

heartbreak you got Buckner between the legs you got Aaron Boone hitting the bomb and in the ALCS. And then Theo Epstein comes in and he builds a winner. They're down three, zero, the Yankees. They come back, beat them. And then they beat Aaron's beloved Cardinals. Aaron's been giving me the thumbs down this whole time. I'm sorry, dog. But so Theo Epstein is the architect of the machine that killed the curse of the Bambino. And then after that, he gets a little bit like nonplussed with his life. Maybe he was too young to deal with it all. He leaves the job.

He just goes on a sabbatical from baseball, comes back and starts working for the Cubs who have their own curse that's lasted 100 years. The GOAT. Builds a juggernaut there that unfortunately beats Aaron's team. The St. Louis Cardinals are in the same division, and then they win the most dramatic World Series of my life. And he has now struck down the two greatest curses in, I will say, all of sports. Right?

Is there anybody more snakebitten than those two organizations who come closer and then fail? And then he got both of them over the hump. I mean, I don't know if there's a more legendary man behind the scenes than Theo. That's fair. It's a good point. But he had a lot more baggage and scrutiny that he was dealing with as well. In some ways, it's a tougher gig being in those markets.

Oh, yeah. Boston is a winning. You got to win in Boston. It's like LA. It's one of the big, yeah, you got to win. And the psychic baggage. Everyone was like, we're losers i don't know aaron you don't like him no fair enough all right aaron's got bias though he's got bias you like tony larusa for sure did you read that book about him the buzz bissinger one

it's supposed to be the anti-Moneyball book. All right. Chad. Go on, feel. Who is your quote of the week? What is your quote of the week? My quote of the week comes from The Patriot. Nice. It's when Mel Gibson does a bargain with General Cornwallis for some soldiers.

Some of his were captured, and he's like, I'm i'm gonna get these guys back so um he uh pretends to have a bunch of redcoats in captivity he's like i have a bunch of them prisoner and uh he's like check out this telescope you'll see those dudes just tied up with a freaking musket to musket to their domes and general cornwallis sees them they're actually just like freaking scarecrows with red coats on. But they look like real dudes. So he's like, their names and ranks? And Mel Gisman goes,

they refuse to give me their names, but the ranks are nine lieutenants, five captains, three majors, and one very fat colonel called me a cheeky fellow. Dank charisma. Yeah, good line delivery by Mel on that one. Yeah.

Yeah. Cheeky fellow. Absolutely fire charisma. The names and ranks. I like that actor who plays Cornwallis. Oh, yeah, he's great. Tom Wilkinson, is it? Yeah.

Yeah. Dude, Aaron coming in hot with the knowledge. What's your favorite Wilkinson performance? Michael Clayton? Oh, yeah. He's getting Clay knowledge. What's your favorite Wilkinson performance? Michael Clayton? Oh, yeah. He's getting Clayton. Yeah, probably. Yeah.

Dude, what about in the bedroom? Mission Impossible Ghost Protocol? Yes. He's a beast. Dude, and then the scene after that where he goes back out and Jason Asit goes, I remember you. You were that man with that stupid boy. Yeah.

Oh, yeah. And then he turns around. He's like like before this war is over like i will kill you yeah so you're the ghost are you yeah yeah i remember you that farm with that stupid little boy yeah he's so good dude he you love to hate him he's an evil motherfucker yeah that's a good you gotta have a good villain dude he's great at that yeah if you have a villain that you agree with their point of view, but you disagree with their tactics of getting it and like what they're doing to do it, then you have something

interesting. Right. Or especially if it's like an empathetic thing where you're like, oh, well, this guy was wrong. I can see why he's doing that. But you know what he's doing is not right. Yeah. Give depth to them.

Yep. I mean, dude, even in like Pan's Labyrinth where he's like the most evil villain in the world. But then when he's taking out the like gorillas the the rebels when he's out in the forest he keeps looking at like a watch that his like brave dad gave him and you're like oh he's just motivated by like this like inadequacy that he feels because of his lineage and you're like whoa all right well now i kind of relate to him even though he's a sick puppy it's wild who's your or what is your quote of the week

damn dude i i freaking came in under prepped i'm like trying to think like of something that's like good from a villain or something but like uh freaking uh even at my valet shift today i saw something where it was like dude do you have a quote from gladiator maybe oh my god yeah thank you dude this is what I needed. All right, dude. Let me just riff on something, dude. Like when Maximus is talking to Jamon Honsu's character, who I'm blanking on, which is very much upsetting me.

Proximo? Not Proximo. I forget. Why it's Jamon Honsu's character? I forget. But anyway. But he's a good friend. Oh, I know who you're talking about. He's legit.

He's legit. And he's like looking at it. He's like talking about his statues. And he's like, looking at it, he's like, talking about his statues. And he's like, what do you tell him when you see your wife? He goes, I tell my boy to keep his heels down when he rides. I smell my wife's hair. It smells like. Speak up a little bit.

My wife, I tell my boy to keep his heels down when he rides. My home, it smells like jasmines in the evening herbs in the day my wife's hair is black like soil and jam on hantu goes what do you tell your wife he goes that's just for me and then they laugh yeah it gives him a little smile yeah and then jam on hantu knows yeah he gets it do you think he showed him how to tongue dart after that oh no question scenes yeah in a movie called glad he ate her uh yeah dude it's definitely in that movie i'll tell you that much big time dude dude thank you for the dude honestly bro you just teed me up that's that's your mom's genetics pumping through you teed me up with that quote oh thanks man i came in here in the back of my mind i was stressing out and look how fired up i am because my bro teed me up with that quote oh thanks man i came in here in the back of my mind i was stressing out and look how fired up i am because my bro teed me up you give me too much credit i appreciate it

thank you but you knew that was in me because you knew me like that why don't you love the movie yeah honestly i was going through scenes in gladiator i was like fuck what do i do what do i do is it the scene when it's you know the african africanist battle scene or do i just go with and dude i've been talking about my gf i'm fired up now that's all i'm saying yeah that's awesome man my quote of the week is from moneyball and it's uh when a billy bean is teaching jonah hill's character the ropes on how to do trades and he's been wanting this one relief pitcher ring cone the whole movie we get about two-thirds through and his momentum starting to build for the ace so now it's time to strike while the iron's hot and get ring cone on the squad and then interestingly enough jonah hill's character i think is based on pete d pedesto who's now the gm for the cleveland browns and i heard

once he found out that they casted jonah hill to play him he said he didn't want them to use his name anymore really because i because i think he's kind of a hot dude yeah and he's like oh billy got brad pitt they're probably gonna give me like le yeah and then they brought in Jonah and that's most robust but Jonah was brilliant but so they're on the

phone and they're working the phones hard trying to get ring cone they're doing deals with other teams just so they can take them out of

the race for this guy and then Billy's talking to the team that's got ring cone and they go alright we'll

give them to you and then the guy keeps talking and Billy hangs up the phone and Jonah Hill's like wait he wasn't done

talking and then Billy goes when you get the answer you want you hang up don't keep going don't keep going you nail it you're done love that yeah love that he was sorkin on that one yeah fire move all right dude should we keep chatting yeah you know we forgot to talk about what was the sleep thing from NASA right wait

have you seen that clip of Brett George, I think it is? Yeah, when he's talking about with the seafood? Farted. Oh, the shit. I shit my pants last night. Yeah, his voice is so funny. Dude, I shit my pants last night. Yeah.

I just had this surf and turf. Dude, the way he's like such a man where he's like, Oh, yeah. So then I get in a taxi and shit's just running down my leg. So I'm freaking the fuck out. I'm wearing shoes yeah dude it's amazing i pull into the lobby i got shit running down my leg my buddy's his gold i'll fart without a fart and just feel this warm liquid just run down my leg i'm like oh crap so So funny.

Yeah, so NASA's got a new thing where if you can lie in bed for 24 hours, they'll give you $18,000. Oh, you got to know you got to lie in bed for two months. Yeah. I think when you see the headline, you're like, that sounds like a cool job. Then you look in further and you're like, that sounds like torture. Exactly. It's going to be the worst gig ever. They need to pay you $180,000 for that for three months. With their heads tilted slightly downward.

Cannot tongue dart from that position. To recreate the conditions of space flight. Fuck that. Dude, yeah, there's just no way. I'm going to make some more tea. Aaron, do we have anyone at 830? Do you guys want to keep going and see if we can just like... We're riffing and hanging out.

Yeah, let's do it. We're fucking dude aaron are you chilling yeah my dogs it's just me and chad in here dude we're posting up aaron of course yeah my phone just there yeah aaron's real dog dude just chilling dude just try to talk to me dude what's uh dude fired up for tahoe thinking about this nasa thing i'm like dude i love me some z's yeah but dude i don't know if i'm trying to think big picture these days but i'm like oh dude everything is like you see the headline and then you just keep on you got to keep reading dude you got to keep getting the information dude because yeah otherwise you're going stoked on a gig you're like what i get to sleep and get paid that's legit legit. That's what I need.

I'm a restless dude. You know, if I, I can't sleep past like 7 a.m. Oh, that's not for you. But even if you were a dude who loved resting, sleeping and saw that, you'd be stoked. But then when you got there, they'd be like, oh yeah. Yeah. And you can't leave the bed and you got to like eat. It's like.

Yeah. I wonder if they, if they are allowed certain liberties, like, can I, you know, eat a Flying Dutchman? Can I smoke a Juul? Right. Like, are they allowed those liberties or do they just have to lay there and then they get space food? If you can't vape in space, I'm out, dude. Oh, dude. Fuck that, dude.

Fuck that. You've got to be able to take your nice little vape break and chill, dude. A little grape flavor just to the dome, dude. And zero gravity. Can you imagine being in the International Space Station and they're like, we're out of jewel pods. And you're like, all right, where's the next 7-Eleven? Yeah.

Dude, fuck landing pods. Give me some jewel pods. You know what I'm saying, dude? Dude, I would totally pay for more jewel pods over emergency pods. I'd be like, you know what? Just negate that whole plan because we're going to need jewel pods. like emergency pods i'd be like you know what just like negate that whole plan because we're gonna need jewel pods that's our emergency because what type of life am i am i looking to you know to save if it's not gonna be dank with some legit jewel pod flavors yeah

but if they went for like original like tobacco flavor i'd be like i'm done with nasa dude i'm out i'm like what up russia like what do you guys got going yeah what do you guys got going on yeah probably something legit probably something hardcore they probably got like vodka up there dude do you think not to stereotype you know but i mean dudes be dang do you think futurists ever like predicted this vape dilemma no there's some dude that knew that vaping was coming he'd be a genius i mean dude they have an old school interview with like jim morrison from the doors and he pretty much describes djs like in the 60s he's like i see the rock and roll going

they're like you know things were going electric and stuff maybe it was like about dylan i don't know what the frame reference was but like he was just yeah, I feel like in the future it's just going to be one artist with electronic noises being able to completely control like their vision and their music, which a lot of the dank DJs do do. I guess the big knock on DJs is that they just sample a lot of music,

but even sampling can be tight and can get you stoked, you know? Yeah. So JT just cruised back in. We're talking about Jim Morrison, how he described music and like artists in the future like musicians and he basically describes djs oh really yeah he's like it's going to be one artist with electronic noises executing his vision like notes will be perfect there won't be it's pretty interesting yeah he

was a smart dude yeah very weird guy totally hot guy Val Kilmer as Jim Morrison hot did you yeah oh yeah and the doors yeah Jesus crazy they didn't want to cast him and then he made a video of him acting like Jim Morrison and sent it to the producers and when the producers watched it they thought it was actually Jim Morrison really yeah genius that's some Dustin Hoffman stuff me a cowboy style yeah Wow yeah it's nice going the extra mile like that. Dude, Val Kilmer in his prime, like when he did that,

Tombstone, Heat, Heat, and then I even like The Saint a lot. I love The Saint. It's dated. It's dated, but it's good. Well, because he gets to play like seven different characters in it.

And what do they all have in common? They're good at seducing people. I like it. I love it. Dude, I watched, recently we watched I like watching this Bengali. Beverly Hills Cop. Pretty much Axl people i like it i love it dude i've watched recently watched as bengali beverly hills cop pretty much uh axel um oh my god i can't fully uh primary skill is that he's unbelievably like

charismatic and can take on characters like he goes like each thing he goes on like becomes like kind of a character right and that's his best thing and he's got integrity and a legit cop and upholds justice for sure for sure but you're right that is the skill that is most present yep he can just fucking gab it up what's fletch's skill chubby chase i think he's skillless is that is that the thing is it like an anti i can't do people like it i've never understood i've never liked that i'm watching everyone's like dude i'm a fletch person i watch and i'm like you just don't make sense to me i am not a fletch person no aaron is it good can you explain to us what's going on in fletch yeah why is it good i want to know because like you say he's just like a normal dude who gets himself in these fucked up situations and he's got to get himself out

he's charismatic and you know he's six foot get himself out. He's charismatic and, you know, he's six foot six, six foot nine with the fro. I like that, yeah. Oh, he dresses in a fro in it? He fantasizes about being a Laker. I like that. I like that. I do like that.

I watched Naked Gun when I was a kid. I loved it. Yeah. I love Naked Gun. Airplane, one of the all-time. Oh, Airplane. I've never seen it. You have to watch Airplane.

Yeah, maybe I'll watch it tonight. Oh, it's amazing. Dude, the jokes per minute are like, I don't think there's any other movie that has more jokes like, like maybe South Park. I don't know. Yo, Farney gave me,

he sent me a wee transfer of American movie. Have you guys seen any of that? No. I saw that. I'm like, what is this? Dude, you gotta watch it. It's so funny. Oh, wait.

I think I did see this. It's a documentary about this guy in the South who tries to make a movie, but he's like really knowledgeable about film, but he's, like, totally in over his head. And just the fucking hilarious shit that he says. He's just amazing. Yeah. How long is it?

Oh, I gotta watch. I think it's, like, 90 minutes. I've only seen, like, 20 minutes of it, but I was just cracking up. Really? You're like, is this real? It's really tough to tell if it's real or not. Yeah, it's fucking funny. I gotta check that out.

Yeah, it's awesome. Chevy Chase. He's supposed to be a mean, mean motherfucker. That's what I hear. I know, it's sad. Him, Chevy Chase. He's supposed to be a mean, mean motherfucker. That's what I hear. I know, it's sad. He looks terrible. Yeah, he does look bad. He needs to cut out the carbs.

My GF and I recently watched Hot Tub Time. Email him. He's got the weirdest energy. Yeah, he looks like a cartoon version of himself now. Yeah. He does what, like, it's kind of like what they teach you to not do, I would imagine, like in acting is like, he has, Chevy chase loves his own joke idea so much that and then he's like in a script of a movie he's like no no i'm just gonna do it like my way even though like he probably like i

don't think he'll try what the writers want or directors right but i mean he's chevy chase there's like there's good actors who are so, they don't want to listen to the director. Yeah. And maybe that's why Daniel Day-Lewis only works with the best directors because he probably really, really, they're in that, he'll actually respect them. But Edward Norton, I heard he rewrites every script of every movie he's in. He's like, nice try. Here's what the movie actually is.

I need to be two different characters. Someone was talking about that. Chris DiLeo was saying that he's like, he's like, I need to be two different characters. Someone was talking about that. Like Chris D'Elia was saying that like he's like, he's like, you can't direct Al Pacino. Yeah. You're like, how do you direct Al Pacino? You just can't do it. Yeah.

You're like, dude, Al, I think you should do it this way. He's like, really? Yeah. What are you talking about? When I was in New York City and it was me and it was. Dude, but at this point I'd be like, Al, you've been in like 25 stinkers in a row dude I think you could use a pointer

What was that thing that he did like Madam Salome or something like that about like the the play that Oscar Wilde wrote didn't he like did like a live that's like what got Jessica Chastain famous he like did that he like directed it like did a live stage reading with it and like Jessica Chastain's amazing

in it, dude. It's called Wild Salome, like Oscar Wilde. That's it. Wild Salome. Salome is the one who's like, bring me John the Baptist's head. Oh, okay. Like her pervert dad. And he plays the king, the pervert dad king.

Dude, just out of lack of knowledge, I'm catching only like maybe 55% of what you're spitting at me. It upholds your thesis of you haven't heard of it and Pacino did it. Well, I was talking more about like 88 Minutes or Righteous Kill. But that sounds great. I've only read like The Importance of Being Earnest, but it was delightful. Oscar Wilde's a legend, dude, beast. Yeah.

Yeah, I talked about it on here one time. Like his line right before he died, he said, me or the wallpaper, one of us has to go. It's a good dying line. But heard i had a buddy who told me that he wrote all of his jokes ahead of time and then he would wait he would like try to shoehorn situations to get to the punch line uh a little psychotic but almost not easy to do also though like he's like i still kind of admire that ask me if i want cheese they're like i don't we don't even have cheese just get some cheese and then ask me if i want it and then they have to go through all the steps and he's like do i do you want the cheese he's like oh i shouldn't but i can resist

everything but temptation they're like all right oscar yeah yeah exactly dude whenever i found whenever you try to do that whenever you like plan a joke in conversation you're like the conversation's going you're like all right i got the zinger in my dome right now and i'm gonna lay it down never works yeah it's always gotta be in the moment if you're attached to the line it just won't fit yeah so you're like and that's why i wore a jacket everyone's like that moment passed like two minutes ago like what are you trying to do he's like correct fuck dude you gotta go back to the drawing board yeah yeah fuck i got the next one. Yeah, that's so true. Trust me, that's funny. Trust me, it's good.

That's one of my biggest pet peeves. What? It's funny. It's funny. Oh, dude, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's funny. It's a joke. Dude, I have a coworker like that who's like, all of his jokes, all they are is like passive aggression.

Yeah. And like him kind of shaming somebody or being like, dude, why are you late again? You're always late. I'm kidding. I'm kidding. And it's like, no, he is, dude, why are you late again? You're always late. I'm kidding. I'm kidding. And it's like, no, he is always late. Like you're just telling him he's late. That's nothing you said.

There was a joke. Or when you joke back with that person and they're like, I'm joking. And you're like, I was joking too. I was playing along with your joke. Yeah, exactly. I was actually making a joke. And then it was, yeah, it's very strange. You know what I think?

If someone says I'm joking, the thing I say back to them now is i'm joking more than you are yeah when people go like when you like show them something or like say a joke or like pitch something to them and they just go that's funny not even that's funny it's more like funny you're like go fuck yourself yeah someone gave me an idea the other day and he was like I almost don't want to give you this idea because it's my baby but I'm just going to tell you the idea

and then he he gave it to me and I was like oh man yeah I was like I was like I don't I was like

I think it needs like one more thing and then I was being kind of a douche but I added something to it and then he goes oh yeah so like making it dumber

and then I looked at him and I was like we're smarter yeah oh really yeah oh my gosh no but it was funny he was just like oh so you make the joke dumber I was like no no're smarter. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, really? Yeah. Oh, my gosh. No, but it was funny.

He was just like, oh, so you make the joke dumber. I was like, no, no, no. I think I'm making it better. Yeah. Where was this, Bert's? No, it was, I don't want to give away the deets because actually he already said, I'm probably going to cut this. He says he listens, so.

Oh, really? Yeah. But I don't think he would remember that it was him. Oh, okay. Because you get ideas from different people. Who knows? I think the moment stuck out bigger in my head than it did in his. I'm thinking.

You know what I mean? And dumb is like a compliment if it comes to comedy. Like, that's so dumb. It's accessible. It's funny. It's simple. It's concise. It's difficult to be simple and concise and get something across.

If you get called across oh yeah if you get called stupid man you're so stupid yeah like thank you my i think my friend ross is a genius because he came up with this plan where he would say something stupid on purpose and then he would correct him and then he would go oh i conned you like i conned you and like basically the whole idea was like if you think i'm stupider than I am, or like, if I act dumb and you believe it, you're an idiot. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Oh, Daniel was the best at one. He would be like, he'd be like, he said Catalina's like an island. He'd be like, Catalina's connected to Newport Beach, right? And then you go, dude, it's an island. And then you go, oh, I conned you. Like, he would say something wrong on purpose you would correct him and then he would make fun of you for correcting

him because he was actually acting stupid he's not actually stupid but the thing he said was so stupid you should have known he was conning you does that make sense yeah i get it and he's very buff so i think a big a big thing is like also just Ross's innate like personality and stuff. Dude, it got so big the football coaches started doing it to each other. Everyone. And then the newspaper wrote an article and they mentioned it in the article. Oh, really? But they called it something else and they didn't credit Ross.

And I read the article and I was like, Ross came up with this. They conned him. They said one of the coaches came up with it. Oh, dude. The coach took credit from Ross. Unchill. That's my beef of the week. High school football coaches, dude. That's my beef of the week is with that coach that took the credit from Ross. Unchill. High school football coaches, dude.

That's my beef of the week is with that coach that took the credit from Ross. Unchill. Let me use the restroom real quick. Drain the lizard, dude. Good luck. Have a good one. What else is up, my dog? What else is up? I don't know fourth of july coming up you guys are going to cabo yeah that's your party trip it should be good yeah i don't even know if i'm gonna drink

though i might just i'm gonna smoke weed that's gonna be tough yeah how many days three or four days too many yeah where are you staying i don't know. I think that one of the guys rented a house. That's cool. Are you near the beach? The Airbnb, the house. Or is it one of those houses like sort of inland a little bit? I think it's, dude, I have no idea. Maybe you can walk to the beach easily. I hope so.

Dude, I'm so, I've checked zero of the plans. Yeah. Like they could tell me anything. They could be like, we're staying like here. I'd be like, oh, that sounds good. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Guy made the Venmo request. I gave it the good, the go ahead.

I'm pumped though. I'm pumped for tomorrow. That should be fun. Oh yeah, yeah. Guy made the Venmo request. I gave it the go ahead. I'm pumped, though. I'm pumped for tomorrow. That should be fun. Oh, yeah. Yeah, I got stacked. I got the audition and Conan and Chernin's. Yeah. That's a big day.

It's a tough character. You're going to crush it. Maybe you want to cut this part out. No, no, let's talk about it. You got an audition tomorrow. Yeah. But, yeah, at first I thought it was, I was like, oh, this is my wheelhouse, you know. But it's a little bit, it's, maybe I'm doing it well, but I'm just in my head.

But it's like. No, I think these are good questions. Yeah, because it's a lot douchier than I originally interpreted. And so I had a more positive spin on it I'm like I would do that though yeah your instincts are good with that yeah I would I would go with the suite because it might be more unexpected you know what I mean but honestly I don't know but I've never really auditioned so yeah I don't know well you just look at the if you look at the writing you're like he's supposed to

be sort of like a he's supposed to kind of turn you off in a way i think i think your take on it though could be stronger than what yeah maybe the original notion was because you've got a good perspective on how to play a bro like you might know more about bros than the bro who wrote it that's a good point thank you yeah no i think for sure yeah Yeah, we'll see. I'm sure you'll crush it, though. It'll be fun. What do you got coming up this week, dude?

Tahoe, dude. My dog. Amped on Tahoe. Freaking chilling, dude. Just came off a fat valet shift of six days in a row. Making those tippy-tippies, which is good. And it's nice.

You know when you've got something that you're looking forward to, like a nice little getaway or vacation, you don't mind being at work, you're like, whatever, I'm doing it, working towards something. So, yeah, just fire it up to go relax. It's going to be nice. Dude, get up in that fresh air. Dude, you see the stars? Dude, having stars is big.

We've got no stars here we got no stars it's unbelievable the sky is unbelievable dude yeah it's amazing yeah it makes you feel good i love looking at the stars i want to get like a telescope that'd be a fire gift and honestly a nice piece of decor as well yeah look anytime you walk into someone's apartment they got a telescope you're like this guy's kind of interesting yeah totally totally and yeah i'm so grateful we live today and not like 16th century europe where if you look in the telescope and you're like, I think this is infinite, then you'll get tied to a pole and lit on fire. Yeah, your best friend rats on you. Chad said the world's infinite.

We're going to light him on fire. Yeah. Yeah, dude. Dude, that would suck. You just get bound naked and you're like, I think we revolve around the sun. Spray him down, dude. Then some priests were like, wait a second. It's infinite.

God is straight up more powerful. He created more stuff than we thought. They make it work, dude. Dude, and then people used to go to executions and stuff, right? Yeah. People would go watch Civil War battles. Yes. They would watch Civil War battles?

I think so. They watched the first battle. They did, yeah. People were literally like, dude, there's photos of that and paintings. Guys would watch Civil War battles? I think so. They watched the first battle. They did. Yeah, people were literally like, dude, there's like photos of that and paintings. Guys would paint battles. They'd sit up on a thing and like paint it. That's insane. In real time. Oh, yeah.

But dude, you got to look at it. That's, what other entertainment was there? Dude, our bro Dan Carlin, dude, hardcore history. Love this guy. Monster. Auto didact, dude. Just was so amped and passionate about history. Taught himself this stuff.

Legit. And dude, he freaking goes, if you're in Munster, Germany in 1800, post blah, blah, blah. And it's, what are you going to do?

There's, the sun goes down, you have candles, you, maybe you can't, you can't read. No one's reading, really. There's the Bible

and that you go to church, you hear that. That's like your weekly thing. You look forward to that. It's social. Yeah. And he's like, there's the bible and that you go to church you hear that that's like your weekly thing you look forward to that it's social press right yeah and he's like what's going on well there's an execution taking place yeah well who's dying what's going on let's go see it happen and like man can you imagine being in a civil war battle but don't oh dude oh dude no that's the worst battle that's the worst battle ever because gut shot and then they don't have any of the medicine, so you just slowly bacteria infection your way to death.

Correct. Was it really my dog Ken Burns saying a dress rehearsal for World War I because that's when they switched to shells from balls. Shells are more accurate projectiles. So that's why the casualties were so high. Obviously, health and stuff kills more people than actual people in battle like people getting sick freezing hunger dysentery yeah that's what kills tons of people um but dude like that style of battle was antiquated and the accuracy of the weaponry would take out guys

at way higher rate than in a revolutionary war so i'll pace the tactics and that happens in every war like every one of those podcasts, like you go into the war and then like by the middle of the war, they're like, that's when they came up with like tear gas. And you're like, whoa, like totally. Yeah, the game is changing. And then the other side doesn't know

what you've come up with. Yeah. Like suddenly they just got a submarine. You've never seen one before. Oh shit. And then you're like, you got to go back to your people. Like, yo, we got to start building underwater shit.

Yeah, dude. World War II, America's like, what are the Nazis doing? Yeah. Fuck, dude. Crazy, dude. And then you got agents going over there like trying to find out necessity mother of invention dude it's crazy dude i i think i would have judged the fuck out of the people who went to the executions and stuff but probably still would have watched them from my place on my secret telescope i think i would have gone i mean dude from your western 21st century eye just because everybody's there?

Yeah. I'm like, dude, are you going to day drink for the execution? People have, like, favorite executioners. They're like, who's performing? They're like, Philip, dude. They're like, oh, that guy can cut off some fucking heads. I mean, I don't like executions, but the way that guy swings a fucking axe, I got to like that.

Well, you've got to be a truest, too, because you can't see his face. You're like, dude, it's all form. The guy's got the best form. The other dude, Steve, I think, his form, he's coming low. He's coming low. They wear their names on their back, but they still wear hoods. Dude, it's like boxers. They've got a walkout song.

Yeah. Dude, I don't like watching Randy. I don't like watching executions, but Randy's got great muscle tone. And the way he swings that axe, it is just a perfect circle, dude. They're executing a big, thick-ne neck guy tonight, so I'm really curious. Yeah. Last Friday was suck. They just took off some thief's hand.

It was whatever. I mean, it was chill. It was a good stroke, but, you know, whatever. He deserved it. You know, no hand for him now on, you know, but whatever. Hey, you want to go harass the guy in, like, the trap thing with the head and hands, you know? Yeah, exactly. I heard he, like, robbed a place, so let's go.

Dude, you know how we're all starving and, like, work for the Lord of our land? Let's just take whatever lettuce and tomatoes we have and just go throw them at this dude real quick. It's going to make me feel better about me. I mean, fuck my kid who I need to feed, but like, I just want to throw this stuff. Like in a knight's tale. Yes. It's like, where are you getting this fresh cabbage, dude?

Talk about boaking schmoles. Yeah. Just put them in that contraption and throw tomatoes at them. The stalks. Yeah. That wouldn't be our method. We'd, you know, if our pockets were around them wouldn't be our method we'd you know if our podcasts were around them we'd probably advise you you know just talk to him but

yeah exactly just talk to the guy in the stocks and be like bro like what the fuck happened last night he's like dude i fucked up yeah i fucked up i got fucking hammered i understand why you put me in here i fucked up dude oh dude then The guy has nobody else to hang out with, so he stays by the guy at the stocks all day. He's just sitting next to him. He's like, what else is up? The guy at the stocks is like, just chilling, dude. Dude, what do you want to do when you get out of here?

It's like, dude, my fucking neck's going to be sore. I might just take it easy, but I don't know, man. What's going on? Probably go drink again, dude. Where I got fucking in trouble. Don't let me have more ale. I know this sounds bad, dude, but I probably need to grab a beer, honestly. Just to deal Probably go drink again, dude. Where I got fucking in trouble. Don't probably have more ale. I know this sounds bad, dude, but I probably need to grab a beer, honestly.

Yeah, dude. Just to deal with the neck crank, dude. And then church on Sunday. I mean, you know, it's going to be chill. Yeah, dude. Dude, that should roll soon. For sure.

Word. What else? Anything else? Just chilling, dude. Glad to just be in here chilling with my dog. Stoked. Yeah, good to see you guys.

Appreciate you guys moving the pod to record on a Monday. Because me and GF aren't going to be out of town Thursday, dude. Enjoying Toronto. So easy to do. Fired up. We got to get you on as much as possible. We do it for the betterment of Stoked Nation. I think it was good.

I think it was, I mean, dude, this was a legit time, dude. Yeah. Yeah, it was epic. So sick, dude. Dude, that's a nice, if someone says after your podcast that was epic, that's cool. That's when you know. Yeah. Yeah, it was epic. So sick, dude. Dude, that's a nice, if someone says after your podcast that was epic, that's cool. That's when you know.

That's when you know. That's an experience. Yeah, like we're all rocking like goofy golf outfits. Yeah. I like this, dude. It's sick. Straight up.

Caddy hat right here. Yeah, this jacket's great. Dude, I wore this to golf a week ago. You wear that jacket, you're shaving five strokes off your card. No question you'd roll up in that.

I've been getting more into like making statements, you know? Yeah. Like, you know, sort of being bold. Yeah. With fashion or whatever, just like, you know, I'm big on boldness right now, you know? Fuck yeah, dude. I don't want to come in just like sort of like, oh, it's a regular dress, dude. I'd be like, wow, that dude took a chance a chance pick an angle that's a lot of bracelets for me if i do

something kind of wild up top it loosens me up yeah yeah because then if i feel like i'm playing scared otherwise yeah i just do something stupid so it's like all right well i got that out of the way it's like you're slowly picking away at fear yeah dudes i don't mean to be i mean i'm playing devil's advocate big cracks out of but is this the same sort of thinking that due to where fedoras have oh dude i knew that what they're thinking am i peacocking no no i because that's not genuine that's coming from just like i want to get noticed and they fucked they fucked up yeah there's a difference yeah you fucking did it wrong dude you could have done it right you fucking did it wrong dude they did a bad choice they fucked it up and he's making like an individual

choice for each situation yeah it's not like oh i'm wearing a fedora like i'm golfing in a fedora i'm not doing it to impress chicks or make people go like oh look at you it's more like it's more for me you know it's like i like that i'm wearing this this is my choice love that love that you know yeah i'm having fun i'm having yeah that's the biggest yeah having fun that's like oh we're going golfing i'm gonna dress like an extra golfer yeah yeah and you're not getting nuts about it look the part be the part if you need to wear a collared shirt it's not like no i'm wearing a leather vest today it's like well no what would you my dad said he didn't like me wearing it i wore a hawaiian two days in a row in jersey and my dad and i were talking on the phone he's like i didn't like that shirt i was

like what i was like why i i just honestly i love the guy to death but i just think when it comes to fashion he doesn't get it was there too many buttons tom parr likes to have a oh on like too many buttons too many buttons done up I can't do I can't show too much chest No, I know, but was this I think you should Well, I got a lot of chest You do

I'm doing that out of modesty You got some chest lettuce too I'm like a really like You're robbing people Hot gal Yes Who wears like a business suit Correct

You are robbing us of just enjoying You want it I want it Why do you need some back? You need to give it to me I got some chest I got some lettuce on the patch, but I got... Baby.

All I got, though, you've got a nice chest that has pop and fill. I've got a little bit of pop, which is the outside, which you get in your decline press. But, dude, yours has hop and call. Thank you, dude. Fucking thank you. Should we call it? Yeah, let's call it.

Guys, thank you so much for coming in, tuning in to episode 78 of Going Deep with Chad and JT. Thank you, Strider, for coming in. Stoked, amped. Thank you, bros, for having me, dudes. We covered some epic ground. Good advice, good legends, good babes, good beefs, and just, you know, tongue darts, baby.

JT? That's what I'm talking about. If you need advice, these guys are really nice. You want to know what to do and where to go. When you need someone to guide you, there's just a half a throne beside you.

Go and see. you going free going free I'm going deep deep deep