Good Guys - Ben Parties with The Stars & Josh Goes DEAF?

Episode Date: August 8, 2024

Calling all morons! It’s pod day and the guys are back with another one. This week Ben shares how he lived it up at Surf Lounge among the who’s whos (Kate Hudson, Anderson .Paak, Jeremy Piven, Gwenyth Paltrow?!). The guys also get into why “the scene” actually sucks sometimes, menus for their would-be restaurants, and how Josh may or may not be going deaf. The big Microsoft outage might’ve cancelled some brain surgeries, NY and NJ are still beefing, and the boys may be full of ailments, but we’ve got speakpipes and the show must go on! Having to pay for a mandatory luncheon with the school faculty… What are ya nuts?! Leave us a voicemail here! Sponsors: Visit creamcheese.com for recipe inspiration and so you can start adding Philadelphia to your recipes at home!  It's the burger worthy of a nickname. Order the McDonalds QPC today. Earn points by paying rent right now when you go to joinbilt.com/GOODGUYS. Visit Carawayhome.com/GUYS10 or use code GUYS10 at checkout for 10% off your purchase. Please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode. Produced by Dear Media. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The following podcast is a dear media production. I'm Josh Peck. And I'm Ben Sauffer. And we're the good guys. There's a lot of guys out there. And we're the good ones. Mazel morons. Welcome back to the Good Guys podcast.

I'm sitting here with the guy who screwed up that cybersecurity thing that basically just screwed every Microsoft computer on earth. It's Ben Sopper. I fell asleep. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. It was all manual. I fucked up.

Blame me. Blame me. You know, honestly, that's a perfect segue. Because on a sister show of ours, I'll call it The Toast, every single time there's an audio problem, they blame me. Josh, I don't know if you know this. They're like, Ben records good guys, and he fucks up the whole studio.

And it's like, no, actually. Like, you guys just fucked up yourself. I am a proud renter of the studio. I've never touched a thing. Now, on the flip side, I do want to shout out quickly. Jackie Oshry, for those that don't know, co-star of the Toast, my sister-in-law, has been baking a sourdough, Josh, every single day that we've been here.

I have had fresh bread every day. She went from just the classic sourdough to she perfected it. She is now starting to incorporate things like cinnamon, sugar, and raisins. Wow. I'm eating. Jewish. I'm eating a cinnamon sugar raisin sourdough that is so unbelievably delicious. And now you're going to think at home, Ben, don't you?

You're recording a podcast, don't you? I just want you to hear. Can you hear this? Did you hear that? Not a thing. Cool. Well, it was fucking delicious. And if you could hear it, if you could see it, if you could taste it, I'm going to swallow this.

Did you think I was supposed to hear it? I feel very much put on blast. I thought maybe there was like a little bit of a crunch. Like maybe you'd hear like a... Right. Sourdough. Oh, so good. Yes, totally.

There may be perhaps it's, I don't know. So good. So good. So good. So just wanted to publicly, what is that called? when you give somebody like a compliment, give them their what? Flowers. Flowers.

Thank you, Josh. I wanted to give her her flowers on sourdough. And Josh, if you want a loaf, she's making loaves and shipping them. We'd be happy to ship you a loaf. Like, is she just shipping them as like a bit of a mitzvah, a lovely piece of charity? Or is she charging? Love. Love.

She hasn't shipped a loaf yet, but she's been giving out loaves. Like, as a thank you, she hands somebody a loaf. Imagine that. Somebody hands you a full loaf. that they made. That's huge. Huge. It's 24-hour process.

That's very, that's Amish-coated, and I'm here for it. Like, oh, yeah. Can you imagine if you were like, I just want to thank you, here's a quart of milk from my cow. No, she, it's amazing. It is Amish-coated, and she is milking her own cows, and that's how she's making this bread. It's unbelievable. It's unbelievable. And it tastes so good.

So the flowers have been given. That is that. The toast never gives us flowers, Josh. They don't. I mean, I do love the Jackie Osri's on a show called The Toast and she's making bread. Ooh. Ooh, true. But Marshall, since you have a vendetta against delicious things, what are your feelings about sourdough bread?

No, it's the best bread. Isn't it? Yeah, it's the best. It's just salty. It's so good. Going to Disneyland or it's California Adventure, I think, and they have like the sourdough factory. For some reason, that was life changing growing up. So good.

What about a bread bowl? How do we feel about that with like some sort of soup in it? Love it. Like it's mushy. I love it too. Oh. Hang on. Hang on.

I'm swallowing. It's the texture. It's the mix of texture. Okay. I've swallowed it. I love a bread bowl. That said, there's something like something's belong in bread bowls. Some things don't.

Okay. I think a bread bowl for soup is nuts. Totally nuts to eat hot soup out of a bread bowl because any error, you're relying on a perfect loaf, Josh. A perfect loaf. Not a single hole, not nothing. Or otherwise, you get boiling hot soup just pouring out of the bread bowl. I prefer a little spinach artichoke dip in a bread bowl. Fantastic. A dip. The problem to me, though, is like, if you're smart, you can be consuming bread bowl as the soup slowly recedes. You can't, like, dip is so calorically dense that that bread bowl is purely for aesthetics. It's true. It's true.

You're right. Can you imagine cleaning out a sourdough bread bowl that would have a bread bowl that was full of spinach artichoke dip? You'd have to call the police. You would. No, it's way too much. Way too calorically dense, too much. And honestly, I've been meaning to bring this up because I'm cooking every single day and I'm noticing I'm trying not to waste, Josh. But inevitably, there will be waste.

And this is not my what are you nuts. This is just something that is nuts that I've been noticing is the people who work in herbs. right? Let's say a dill. I love dill. The way that they sell dill is by the bushel. You're buying a bushel with dill. And dill, you do not need a bushel of dill for anything. That amount of dill is for like 200 dishes. You need a little dill. It's a very powerful herb. And dill only lasts like two days in your fridge. So you're buying this dill. Then you got to throw it all away. Same thing with scallions. Same thing with chives. They're giving too much, too much. I don't know if this is interesting, but there's a lot of waste. I think you bring up a great point. First of all, how come there's no Dill brand called Delicious? Secondly, green onions, I think, can go further. My wife will fuck up a bunch of green onions and throw them in like a Thai peanut noodle thing.

Yum. Yum. Oh, my God. Marshall over there is like, when can I come over? I mean, this would be a vegan delicacy. Get in line, Marshall. Hans is tonight. Magnus is tomorrow.

You can come on Thursday. But what I'm trying to think of, because you bring up a great point, and I'm trying to think of what is there too much of that gets sold, that you wind up always having to throw half of it away. It's vegetables. It's those herbs. Like nobody ever, ever goes through herbs fast enough. It's impossible because vegetables are a little bit different. Like carrots, you could always just make more carrots. Right. In order to proportionally have the amount of dill to use before it goes bad, you, you,

would need to make like 50 pounds of potatoes, like just too much. It just, it just doesn't work. Yeah. It's a crazy amount of herbs. It's big herb. So you've been eating this fresh sourdough bread. That's great. Do you guys, are you, so in addition to being like completely home body, Hamptons, suburbia, bucolic, are you tearing it up? Are you going to the surf lodge? Are you guys doing any cliche Hampton's activities? We went to the surf lodge. We went to the surf lodge. one time. Did we talk about that event? I'm not sure. Okay. Well, if we did, I apologize for having brain damage. And in case we didn't, we went to Surflage once. We are mainly being homebodies, Josh, mainly homebodies. I somehow here have lost five pounds just by eating everything that

I'm cooking. I'm eating. I'm cooking. I'm eating. I'm not dieting. I'm not doing anything. I think just not eating out, not partying, not drinking too much, but our one day at Surfodge, Kate Hudson performed. Wow. That's a what are you nuts. Nuts. She was pretty good, but she sounded like Cheryl Crow. Like, I just like wasn't in the mood for that live. That's saying something. Cheryl Crow is a national treasure. She is. But like when you're trying to like rage, you don't want Cheryl Crow. There's a time and place. And like I just wasn't feeling it. But she was fantastic. You know who was there? Josh? I looked out of the corner of my eye. Jeremy Piven. He was there just watching. And then all of a sudden I watched him take a phone call. And I'm like, oh, he really is Ari Gold. He was on the phone for an hour and 15 minutes during Kate Hudson. That tracks. But we ripped. We had a great time, partied. Let me ask you this.

Was Jeremy Piven wearing statement clothes? I imagine him in bracelets. I think he's wearing a statement glasses and very well-groomed facial hair. Yes. Yes. That's exactly what he looked like. Yes. I think maybe the facial hair was a little bit shorter, but he was wearing like big borderline

Carreras, like that type of sunglasses. Sure. Yeah. He looked great. Like, he looked fantastic. Kate Hudson, she sounded great again, wasn't in the mood for sure. Cheryl Crow, but she sounded great. Gwyneth Paltrow was there as well. This is a real who's who's who. It was just a random night at Surf Lodge. Is it that bushy? Yeah, it's that bougie. Yeah, it's that

bougie. Wow. Interesting. It's, yeah. And it's, it's crazy. What Surf Lodge has become also, like, my parents used to take me to Montauk like 20 years ago. And it used to be like the bumy beach, just like part of the Hamptons where like nobody went. Like it was just motels and we'd get a motel and we'd go to the beach and it was fun and chill and whatever. And the surf lodge was just like this rinky dink motel. It's not on the beach. It's on a lake. It's like, not even a lake. It's like on a pond. And like the way that they've been able to turn what, what is like a motel six into the who's who of who's who clubs is fascinating. This episode of the Good Guys podcast is brought to you by Philadelphia Cream cheese. If there's anyone that knows creamy, it's me. No, I'm kidding.

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Let's go. But the people that regularly would go to a surf lodge or are traveling to the Hamptons to be able to go to these hot places where they're going to be seen like, I don't know how to have fun in these places. I would not have fun. They're not built for you anymore. They're not even built for me anymore. Like that person is Marshall. That person is nice and shallow. No, no.

No, it's built for the like wants to be in the scene, 21 to 28 year old. Like that's really who these clubs are built for. They're like, wants to get fucked up and wants to have a good time and wants to have something to post on Instagram and like wants to be in the scene. But then why is Gwenith Paltrow there and Kate Hudson and Jeremy Piven? I think that Kate Hudson was there to promote an album. That's why she was singing. Okay. And I think that Gwyneth Paltrow and Jeremy Piven probably came because they're friends with Kate Hudson to support their friend.

And for like the excuse of, oh, I get to go to surf lodge this one time. this summer. I think it was a coincidence. Gotcha. Gotcha. Or they are or they frequent. I have no clue. I highly doubt that they frequent. I just don't. I just find like the the way I'm going to have the most fun is at some like random bowling alley bar with a bunch of characters, you know, or like that that like hole in the wall can only fit 25 people karaoke bar that we went to with Claudia when I was in the city last. Like that to me me is a great time. It's the best. But one more, but quick shout out, Anderson Pack came on after Kate Hudson. Yeah. And that man can boogie. Oh, can he buggy? Like, I'm telling you, Josh, you would

have loved him. He only DJs on vinyl, so talented, and he just plays the tunes. Like, he's not afraid to play earth, wind and fire. Like, he knows that, like, the white people are ready to start clapping like they're out of bar mitzvah. Like, this is what they want. He knows what the, he knows what the people want and he plays it. Ooh, he was a, I was about to say he was a sleigh. It was a movie. Last night was a movie.

Anderson Pack? Last night was a movie. Oh, gosh. Oh, I hate it. So cringe. It's the worst, man. And I don't know. Like, that's a good question, right?

Because I look at, except for Marshall, Gen Z, as just cringy as fuck. Like, I don't know. And maybe that is the old. And I try to, I try to keep it in check because I never want to be the old man screaming down at the generation after me going like, you kids don't get it. But like Marshall, do you look at like zoomers like at 17 year old kids going like, ugh, like your style sucks? No, I've had the same sentiment as you or I'm like, I cannot be the hater. I didn't like like in 2020 with like the rise of Gen Z when it was like hate on every little thing that they do.

Right. I was like, you just never want to turn into that person. Right. It's so hard. Marshall, are you not Gen Z? I am. So I guess we, not they.

You're on the border, right? I'm like the oldest. So I was born in 1997, and that's like the cutoff. So I'm like, I'm the dad of the Gen Z group, the oldest of-

97. What a great year. Great year, right? Odd number. Great year to be. living. 97. What did that look like for you?

What were you? Five, Ben? I was five. What a year. So good. Geez. Five years old. On the scene of it all, do you, Ben, you in the city and Josh, you in L.A.,

do you go to, like, the sceny places? Like, the places that you see TikToks about, or is it, like, avoid at all costs? I think that I speak for both Josh and I, where we love food. Like, we're going to go to the trendiest restaurant we possibly can. The hope is that we're not losers and late and that we hit it before there's a TikTok about it. Yeah. That's always the hope.

Right. Like from a scene perspective, like that's, I want to try. If you're telling me that this is the best canola you've ever had in your life, you better believe I'm going to go. Yeah, but I'm going to go at 1130 when they open for lunch and sit at the bar alone. Yeah. No, I'm not waiting in a line. I'm not waiting in a line for the fad.

But for a great restaurant, yeah. Love it. Love it. There are places that are only Sini for Sini sake. And then there's like, like in L.A. We have this place, Georgia Obaldi, which is like very solid, very good, overpriced. But it's like great Italian food. It's literally a block away from the ocean.

It's kind of like a hidden gem of a place. And there's famous people there a couple times a week. And you could go there on a night where it's like surf lodge level. You're, you know, you're eating men of gut with freaking Jeremy. Kevin. Okay. Rihanna loves it. Rihanna loves it.

But you know what it is? It's delicious. And it serves its purpose. And like you go in, there's never a line because like, you know, there's reservations that are really hard to get. But it's standard restaurant fair. You go in. You sit down.

You eat food. Maybe you see some famous people. The food is really, really good. And then you leave. I have all the time in the world for that. Because it's, it just happens to be that famous people. like it and it's good. I don't have time for like, you know. I have the, I have the prime examples. Scene for Sini's sake is the absolute worst. There's a place out here in the

Hampton's called the Golden Pear. There's like six of them. That's what they call me. That's what they call me on Grindr. Sorry, guys. In every Hampton there's a golden pair. And every single, I see the influencers, they'll like go in, they'll get this sandwich, they'll taste and they'll say, oh, that is so good, the golden pear. And it's like, no, it tastes like shit. I tried it. It's bad. The coffee, Josh is so bad.

So bad. And it's like, it just became a name. But a name for a namesake is terrible. Terrible. And while I'm on this tangent, Claudia, my wife loves, loves just like a pretty seemy restaurant. She does not care one bit if the food is edible, if the restaurant is fun. And all I have to say is, oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. I'm the polar opposite.

Give me the worst experience in my life. Let the food be great. Food needs to go. Food needs to come first. It must. If we were all opening up a restaurant, give me your three appetizers, three entrees, and two desserts. Three, three, and two. Yeah, for then restaurante, for Marshall's Place and for Joshy's cabin.

Okay, we're going to go with a Caesar. Right. Because we've spoken about this before, a table side Caesar. All right, fine, we'll just do table side. Great. No, a table side Caesar, fantastic. I love a nice, great, fresh tuna tartar. Mmm.

Delish. And then I'm going to go with a crazy one here, but I don't want it to be too heavy to start. I'm going to go with a delicious stuffed artichoke. Like, meaty, peel it off with your teeth, get to the bottom, eat the heart. Fantastic. Those are my amps. On the entree side, I'm going to go with, maybe this is like a mid-course, not too heavy, maybe like a caccioi pepe. I love so delicious. Then we're going to go to a steak. I'm going to go with probably a porterhouse is what I'm going to go with. And you're going to absolutely love the filet. And you're going to lightly complain about the strip, but that's just because the filet is better.

It doesn't mean that the strip is bad. And then for our last one, ooh, ooh, ooh, Oh, oh, fuck. Maybe. I get some sushi. No. No, that ruins my vibe. But the restaurant, the vibe of my restaurant is so good. Chicken parm.

We're going to know with a chicken parm. And then for dessert, warm apple pie with a scoop of vanilla ice cream. Pass. Wow. Marsh, you're up. Okay. For appetizers, chips and guac. Lots of lime.

Lots of salt. Anything like a crudite hummus situation. Yum. And then boneless, or no. What am I thinking? I'm not boneless wings. Colum flower wings. No bone.

100% no bone. No meat. Josh, we're going to run into Marshall. Like wearing a mustache. Sitting at the glass. Sitting at Terry Black. Just hammering quarter pounders of cheese.

He was crushing a rim. Me in a trench coat. Marshall, is that you? No, no. No, not me. No speak English. Okay, so boneless, meatless, cauliflower wings. Okay, for the main meal to play off, you know, the hummus, the Mediterranean, but all, I think,

falafel pita wrap, stunning vegetables, hummus, things like that. You can put the hummus from your appetizer in the pita, you know. And then, like, my favorite dish when anyone asks of all time is a chana masala. It's like the chickpea masala. Yum. And so it doesn't fit, really, with the rest of the food, but. Delicious, though. And then how do I get people to show up with a dessert of mine?

Let's just go. Let's go some like donuts. Mm. Vegan donuts. Okay. Mine is first a Japanese Caesar salad, which is done at probably my favorite steak restaurant in L.A. called Matu by the great Jerry Greenberg. Shout out, good friend of my friend Jordan Oaken of the Air Jordan Food Podcast.

Jerry Greenberg is the genius behind Sugarfish. Kazunori, Hi-Hoh burger, Volvo, pastas. And so he opened up his flagship steak restaurant in Beverly Hills. And they do a Japanese Caesar. And I just like, when I tell you the tang, the tang on this dressing, I don't know if it's QP Mayo. I don't know what's giving it that, but it's gorgeous. I think he doesn't.

Honestly, I think they just split an iceberg lettuce in half. and it's just a layer, like almost like a bread and butter, a layer of the dressing over each half of the iceberg, and then just like a fresh flowering of the most beautiful palm, lightest, just like subtle palm you've ever had over the top of it. So good. So we're going to do that. We're going to do a sushi roll a la Hillstone.

So something with either a tuna or a yellow tail or even a shrimp and a macadamia nut for the crunch, for that crunch. And you know what? I don't care if it gets me canceled. There will be a remalad. Rema. Ooh, la, la, la. Okay?

That's what I'm saying. And then for the fat boys, we're doing a, not deconstructed, but a high-end spinach artichoke dip, that I'm going to get together with some food scientists and also some people, some people who work at like chilies. I'm going to get a high-end. food scientists and like a chef from chilies to blend their minds. I'm going to make them

go on an ayahuasca journey to come up with the perfect high and low end spinach artichoke dip bong. And there's going to be an assortment of different things for dipping. I'm talking crudette. If if Marshall comes, sure, you can't have the dip, but he can eat some carrots, some fried pitas, some fresh chips, like beyond. For the mains, I hear you on the Cachui Pepp, although a little part of me feels like Cotrui Pepp is done so much nowadays. I'm just not sure. I think you do fresh rig, fresh made rigatoni, and you do a very simple but like the best ever, like Van Goli. Like oil, a little bit of parsley, garlic, pepper.

Just like, little salt. Light. Simple, light, beautiful. Then we're doing a snake river rib eye, okay? But not like the one that we almost bought for $900. I didn't say, I didn't realize our budgets were unlimited. We're doing Snake River ribby. Maybe not the one that they had at Major Food Group, but a lower end, still great.

And it's a rib eye and it's going to be sliced up with the cap. Or maybe we do, do we do a porterhouse? The porterhouse has the bone down the middle, right? That's like the way they do it at, um, the problem with the porterhouse is sort of as advertised. The filet side is so good. So good. And the strip side is so normal that like after you've had the filet,

you don't even want the strip. That's my only problem with it. Is that what they do at Lugers? Yeah. Yeah. All right. So maybe you do a ribby, but you do the ribby and you do the ribby cap, sliced, done, little malden sea salt finishing.

And then agreed with you, we do, mm. Now, do I, do I copy? you and do a parm or do I do we don't have a seafood maybe we need a seafood. We could a little clams casino. Vazmir. If only in a world, in a world. Because you know, like you could do like a beautiful colomar. You could do, oh wait, wait.

I mean, this is another pasta, but you could do a fruit da mara, a chapino, like a beautiful chapino and the tomato boulea base with the bread. the sourdough spears fucking flipping out, giving the finger to everyone at the table with those sourdough spears and the beautiful, the clams and the colomar and the, you get it. And then here's my dessert, ready? Homemade, homemade Swedish-inspired gummies.

Home-made Swedish-inspired gummies. The waiter comes with a tray, and it's like you're at sweet factory. And you're giving your own. little tongue and he's got sour strips, he's got gummies. So good. And you're just taking a couple and then he goes, hold on, and he gives you a little bag and goes, take a couple for the road. But the drive home. Wow. Thanks, guys. Love you. So good. You know how much I love a sour straw? So delicious. So good. Agreed. So good. This episode of the Good Guys podcast is brought to you by Carraway. You guys know I love Carraway. Love it. I've been on my cooking journey

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So visit carawayhome.com slash guys 10 or use code guys 10 at checkout. And don't forget to mention that you heard about Carraway from us in their post-purchase survey, Carraway, non-toxic cookware made modern. This episode of the Good Guys podcast is brought to you by the McDonald's Quarter Pounder With Cheese. Let's talk about something delicious, something hot and juicy, something cooked when you order, something fit for a good guy. It's the Quarter Pounder with cheese.

It's a burger so iconic that it's simply known as the QPC. Each QPC features a burger that sizzled on a flat iron grill and then topped with slivered onions, crispy pickles, and two slices of melted cheese on a sesame seed bun. I'm salivating, just talking about this, I am not doing well. Let's distract ourselves by talking about our ideal moment to savor and enjoy a QPC, which after recording this read, maybe the minute we're done recording this episode. I absolutely love recording a QPC when I'm on a long drive. You know, I'm going from the city to the Hamptons.

I know, boozy. I'm like that. I'm bougie, you know. So I'm driving out, I'm starving, I'm stopping at the McDonald's roadside, picking it up, and enjoying my time. Sitting in a nice air-conditioned car during the summer eating a QPC is the dream. The car QPC is it, folks. I highly, highly recommend it if you've never tried it.

But of course you've tried it. Everybody's tried it. But if you haven't tried it, you should definitely try it. The QPC is a burger that napkins were made for. And as someone who enjoys sauces galore, I feel extremely seen. It's the burger worthy of the nickname. Order the QPC today. Wait before cooking four ounces.

Fresh beef available at most restaurants in the contiguous U.S. Not available in Alaska, Hawaii, and U.S. territories. You brought up a steak. We both brought up steaks, and it had me realizing something that I wanted to share in a long-form format such as this. I used to, as an inexperienced barbecuer, cook, whatever you call it, I used to take my meat, And I used to put like a marinade of like a barbecue sauce or like a mustard or like like all loaded up. And I've come to realize that if you want to ruin a piece of steak, you add anything more than salt, pepper, and oil. When that puppy goes down, if it's great meat, salt pepper oil.

If you want to go crazy, you could throw in a little garlic powder. But that's crazy. Because great meat, you want to taste the great meat. Now, if you're dealing with an inferior cut, sure, load on the sweet baby rays and let it taste just like sweet baby rays. But the difference between us and the vegans is that perfect meat, that delicious taste. The fat cap, as you mentioned, Josh, you feel and taste the fat. Otherwise, I might as well be barbecue and cauliflower. Because if you want it to taste like sweet baby rays, why are you using meat?

Mic drop. Wow. Beautifully said. Beautiful. Random, random mic drop. that nobody asked for. Should we get to some stories? I would love to get to a story.

Well, this one was, thank God she's okay, and I'm qualifying that first, but this was a wild story in the post. My life-altering brain surgery was canceled after Microsoft outage, hit hospital equipment. Whoa. Wow.

Whoa. A cancer patient says surgery to remove a four-centre mask from a brain was canceled this week due to the worldwide IT glitch. And she was told three weeks ago a mask had also been found in her brain and she had weakness on one side. So she was all set to go in the UK for surgery at 10 a.m. And before she was watching TV in the waiting room and there was news of the Microsoft technology facing outages.

And 10 minutes later, her surgeon arrived to explain they relied on that technology for scans, emergency meds, and accessing medical records, and that they would have to wait until it was solved. And yeah, and she had to wait a week. But isn't that nuts? Yes. Yes, totally nuts. Very scary.

I'm sorry. We're too reliant on technology. Too reliant. Something's going to go wrong. We need to be better. I mean, that to me, like, especially when you think of like Elon Musk doing like neurolux, doing like neurolink and like these things that it could be affected by that and all of a sudden you're like like you're talking to your friend you're like so then I went to surf lodge and

like do you do like yeah did I tell the story about when I test drove a BMW in South Carolina did I tell this story no okay I was in I promised this isn't just a tangent it makes sense no I love I was in South Carolina a month ago tested a bunch of sick cars, sick cars. This is like an M6 and like there was a professional driver sitting next to me and I was in the seat next to him. And this guy was for loring it going like 170, Josh, around like crazy turns like really, really like fully on a track. And I turned to him and I had just watched the Titanic. And I turned to him and I said, how do you know these things aren't going to flip? Like how are you so confident going 170 around a turn that this thing isn't

going to flip. And he said, this thing is built to not flip. It will never flip. And it just made me think the Titanic was the unsinkable ship. And Neurrelink is the technology that won't ever go down. And when human beings make something, it will go bad. It's just a question of when. Like, when will something happen? When? Not if. When? But think about this. Okay. It will never flip, Josh, never. No. Brightside Josh Peck over here, if I may. Say you do have like a neurolink thing installed in your brain, you know what I mean? And you want to get out of conversations. Your wife is yelling at you. You are at a bar mitzvah that's like taking forever and the kids half Torah is totally out of pitch. You fake like you just got a system update. And you fucking

take a nap for 45 minutes. Your wife's like, you never listen to me. It's over. I mean, it's a pretty good excuse. Well, that's like my brother-in-law, who you've met. He wears one hearing aid. Sometimes I'll catch him. I'll be like, did you not hear anything that I say? He's like, no, he'll just intentionally not put in the hearing aid when he wants to just disassociate.

He has them. He can use them. But just in case he doesn't want to hear, you know, what you have to say. Maybe he wants some peace and quiet. Is he completely deaf in that one ear? Yeah. or like 90%. Does he have a cochlear implant?

We're going to have to ask him. I don't know the exact implant. I just know that the hearing aid came from Costco. Oh, that's where I'd get mine. I have more questions. Should I need one, but I don't wear them because I'm vain? Yes. Yes.

Should I? Okay. How bad is your hearing? I didn't know. Don't ask my wife. I mean, I can hear you because I have two headphones like very close to my ears right now. So, but in both ears you have issues? I don't hear great.

Okay, I didn't know. How long has this been going on? What a sweet... Marshall, can we just note how freaking flipping sweet this boy is this, Ben? He seems really hurt for me. Yeah, he went into empathy mode immediately. It was amazing. I would like to know how long.

No, it's first empathy and then it's diagnosis. How long? Ben skipped straight over sitcom mode and go straight to empathy mode. Title. I'll tell you my suspicester. The suspicion is that when I made the great cinematic masterpiece, Red Dawn, in my early 20s, we had to shoot a lot of guns and there were a lot of explosions. And while we wore hearing protection, I remember going home from work one day and just

having like a ringing in my ear that didn't go away for a couple days. And ever since then, it's felt like it's slowly kind of degraded. I don't know if it's from that. It might just be my ears. Okay, two things. One, can we sue Red Dawn? Who would want to do that? I don't know.

Okay, two, have you seen a doctor? Yes. Okay, you have. Because they could also be like middle ear infections. There's like some things. Okay, all right, you're going deaf. Don't say that. I would highly recommend that you get something to help you here for sure.

Okay, cool. So like, can we, maybe I could do like a collab. like Josh Peck and Balenciaga, like does like, you know, like Kirkland, Belensiga, like, hearing aid? That's hot. Yeah, you could. It is hot. For sure.

For sure. It's not going to happen, but it's hot. Well, who is a couture brand that's on the ropes? Doce Cabana? Yeah, maybe. Maybe. Hmm. That's a good question.

A coutour brand that's on the ropes. We got to find someone that we can, like, lift out of obscurity and reignite them. be kooji, you know, Kooji sweaters? A Kooji, Josh Pek, Kirkland collab? That's fucking not. Yeah, we're going to get you a deal. And we're going to get you free hearing aids.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. If you're the head of a big hearing aid company, come to Josh. Are so going to be, you're hurt, you know? Hey, by the way, you heard. Be honest, Josh. Are you only pretending to have a hearing aid problems so you can get one of those once in a lifetime deals with a hearing aid company?

I mean, I'm Down the clown. I don't think I'd say no. No, I mean, it's very, it's not impacting my life in a negative way other than my wife gets very annoyed with me. It could be too niche, but I know that we share this like, we both think that this is very funny. Like when certain brands like are looking for people to do deals with, it's very rare

that you're going to find the person that like actually has the asthma to advertise the asthma medicine. But when you have the ailment that they're. trying to promote. Oh, there's nothing sweeter because those people pay. Yeah, let's put it on record here. God willing, we've got some farmer reps listening of like our ailments that we feel. And don't lie, just be straight up. Like, I will be honest. I've had childhood asthma since I was three. I have mild to severe asthma depending on the time of year still at 37. Also, I take a sprinkling of antidepressant every day. I take allergy pills. What else? Oh, I'm on cholesterol.

And I can't hear. Marshall? Okay. I'm rock-telling mentally, but I have scoliosis and a nicotine addiction. Any vapes. Someone hit them up. Help. The scoliosis is interesting, Marshall.

My dad is bad scoliosis. If you ever need somebody to talk to, see, empath. I, allergy meds, Zyrtec every single day, phlonease up the nose. I have some sinus problems. I've recently started a rinse. I've been, I've spoken about it. my usage of the Navaj before. Love the Navaj.

Listen, Navage does not have Pfizer money. Do not bring up Navaj again. Okay, fine. But I put in drops that go into your inhaler, Josh. Albuterol. Yes, and they open up my sinuses and I can breathe. What else do I have? I'm a big antihistamines or tech guy too.

Love. Flonis, gorgeous. It's fantastic. I love a geramine. Your dramine's fantastic. Oh, Josh. Gosh, hilarious story. We were just,

Claudia just did two shows last week. And she was really nauseous. And she asked somebody, like, before the show, can you get me a drama? I mean, make sure that it's non-drowsy, because I have a show. And they went, they brought it to her. She's like, this is non-drowsy, right?

Took it 35 minutes later. She's asleep. Because I don't think that exists, a non-drowse drama. There is non-draisy drama. I mean, it does exist. This person fucked up. She was asleep. She woke up like an hour before the show,

chugged a Red Bull, and like somehow pulled it together, but she was basically poisoned. That said, dramamine fantastic. Dramamine fantastic. I have Zofran ready to go at any time. You know this? This Zofran? You know this?

I know the Zofran. I know it. Zofran is definitely better than Tremamine. It's an anti-naugamide. And I have some because your boy gets nausea, nausea every now and then. And let me tell you, I would imagine that having it is like when people who have panic attacks have, you know, Valium or Xanax with them and they never take it, but just knowing they have it, like knowing I have an escape from nausea if and when the couple times a year it hits me,

I don't, I never use it. But it like makes me feel good to know I have it. Did I ever teach you my nausea trick? With the, with the wrist. I did. It's so good. It's so good. It's so good. For anybody that doesn't know, you have a pressure point in your wrist, okay? You feel nauseous. That's why they sell. like those like bands when you're on a cruise where you can like put the band on your wrist

it's really just hitting the pressure point take your hand and put it on your wrist squeeze tight 25 seconds let go no more nausea who needs zofrin who needs drown you just need the good old hands God gave you on the good old wrist God gave you

well did you know that a New Jersey man flies to Florida to attack another player over an online gaming dispute deputy say in Fernandina Beach, Florida, an online gaming dispute made its way to the real world when a New Jersey man flew to Florida to attack another player with a hammer. Edward Kang 20 is charged with attempted second degree murder and armed burglary with a mask, according to Nassau County court records. He was arrested early Sunday morning. I just want to let you know this is a weird one. Nassau County Sheriff Bill Leeper said during a news conference, some things you can't make up.

Kang and the victim, another young man around the same age as King, had never met in real life, but they both played arch age, a medieval fantasy multiplayer online role-playing game. King flew from Newark, New Jersey to Jacksonville, Florida last Thursday after telling his mother that he was going to visit a friend and he'd met while playing a video game. Officials didn't say how Kang learned where the victim lives, but upon arrival, he took an Uber to a hotel about 35 miles north of Jacksonville. bought a hammer at a local hardware store. King went to the victim's house,

walked into his home, which was unlocked. The victim was walking out of his bedroom when he was confronted by King, who hit him on the head with the hammer. The two struggled as the victim called for help. His stepfather responded and helped to restrain King until police arrive. Damn.

Wow. That is some angry nerds. That's messed up. And yeah, those are some angry nerds. Did you ever play video games, Josh? A little bit. What was your game of choice? I was, I'm a normal, like, kid.

I liked all the Grand Theft Autos. I was speaking into that. I like, I like this, I like these games Command and Conquer. Did you ever play that? No. What system was that? It was a computer game. It was real nerdy.

Okay. It was one of those, like, it was like Sim City, but with war, right? So you, like, build a base, and then you build, like, your army. I loved it. Command and Conquer Red Alert. Command and Conquer, Tiberian Wars. I had it all. Yeah, I'm into chess.

I like computer games. Shut up. And I played that. And you basically like create an army and then you attack other armies. Marshall, did you play video games? Solitaire, I think was a big one for me. Wow. No, not really.

I was going to say that doesn't count. I loved, like, big fan of like the NBA lives and then the NBA 2Ks. Oh, sure. Like that, like that was my jam. But like in the like origins. of my gaming. I loved a game called Crash Bandicoot. Of course. You were my wife. You and my wife. She also loved Crash Bandicoot?

Wow. I loved it on the original PlayStation shoutout. We need that PlayStation money. By the way, remember when we used to like grovel for people to pay us and we stopped that like a year ago because people told us to stop doing that? I want to bring that back. Why? We're crushing. Okay. Never mind. I just fade back into the distance. I had an idea for our reviews, though. The morons should leave, when you leave your five-star positive review, please. Yes.

Include your ailment. Let us know what yours is. Love that. That's fun. Yeah. People are going to be really confused. Five stars. I love this podcast.

I have emphysema. Yes. Yes. Love it. IBS Queen from Sarasota. That's funny. I love that, Marshall. Love it. Great idea. Yes. Five stars.

Although, I will say Marshall, someone on a speak pipe complained that they weren't like, because we didn't get reviews for a couple weeks, like there was something like they weren't allowed to leave a review. Oh. I mean, is Apple gatekeeping us? What the frick? I haven't heard of this, but we'll be looking into it. Give a call to Tim Cook. Would you please? Yeah. Timmy C. Timmy C. Should we get to a speak pipe?

Yeah. Love that. Let us talk to. Hunter, let us talk to Hunter. Hey, what's up, Josh and Ben? My name's Hunter. I live in Colorado, but I'm originally from New Jersey. My question is, what's New York's beef with New Jersey? I think it really comes down to driving, and people from New Jersey coming over into Manhattan,

not knowing how to fucking drive in the city, and people from the city coming to New Jersey and not knowing how to drive anywhere but the city. Yeah. Wondering if you guys had any thoughts on why there's so much interstate hate, but at least we can agree on one thing. We all hate Pennsylvania. Have a good one, guys.

Hunter, cute. Okay, first of all, Hunter, fantastic. Marsha wants your number, Hunter. Yeah. What? I heard you back there, Marshall was like, Hunter. Hunter, fantastic. Called out?

Okay, Hunter, though. I have two thoughts. One, yes. Any out-of-state drivers driving in a state that's not there is we automatically want to kill. Like, if I see a Maryland plate in New York, I want to take the Glock from my center compartment, hop out, and shoot them right in the head. That said, a little strong. I don't know when a Glock. That said, I think that the hate from New York comes from our elitist attitudes that nobody can be better than us. And it's a very, very close neighboring. state and they have beautiful big backyards and we have tiny city apartments and there's something just about that feud. That said, when you do drive over and pay that toll, Josh, sometimes I think it's somewhere in Sikakis, it starts to smell like absolute shit. So I think that's also a reason why New Yorkers don't like Jersey because we say that it's smelly. Yeah, anybody who has beef in New Jersey is nuts. New Jersey gets a bad rap. It's the garden state for a reason. It's incredibly green. It's incredibly wonderful. Yes, I'm defending it because I'm from there. But, well, my whole family's from there. And yeah, the Jersey Shore rocks. New Jersey is great. Obviously, it goes without saying New York

is great. Any sort of interstate beef. Get over it. Hunter, feel free to DM our great Marshall. No, my next one is from, and this is going to be good. I already know it. And it's from anonymous. What's up, morons? Yes, you guys are also morons because you're your own biggest fans. So I work in education and we're having an end of the year luncheon hosted by our assistant superintendent and two directors who, for background information, are all narcissistic, egotistical, incompetent assholes. And we have a mandatory meeting from 10 to 12 and then they go, oh, we're going to have a luncheon afterwards. That's the first what are you nuts because I don't want to have lunch with you, fucks. The second, what are you nuts is we're not being invited to lunch.

If you want to eat at the luncheon that they're making us go to, you have to pay $15 to eat lunch. What are you nuts? Either don't have a lunch, in which case I'd go out to lunch with the people I actually want to go out to lunch with or pay for my lunch. Come on. That's nuts. Totally. Nuts. Totally with you. It's completely nuts. It's like the guy that over 30 has you come to his house for a birthday party and then charges you $30 for alcohol. Rare, but I've seen it done. And that's just like, don't have a party. Don't have a party. Don't do it.

Don't have a lunch. Don't do it. If you're inviting me to lunch, it's free. Couldn't agree more. I love how angry you are at your coworkers. I'm sure that's only going to manifest itself in funny and bad ways in years to come. Keep calling in. Okay.

My what are you nuts is something that not nearly enough people are talking. about. Josh, I'm sure that you have gotten many of a request from a wonderful teacher asking you to clear their list recently, right? Because it's that time of year. And every time, every year, I'll get, I don't know, at least, at least 100 DMs from teachers asking me to clear their list. And for people that don't know, that is a list of supplies that they would like to purchase for their class that we are funding because the school doesn't and the government doesn't. And that is my fucking what do you nuts. These teachers make no money. They make no money. They want to buy something cool for the kids. Whereas there should just be like,

like, just like a pot of money, a slush fund for these teachers to not have to come to us to clear their lists. It's so, it's so crazy. It's so sick. It's the definition of Woodya Nuts. Couldn't agree more. Absolutely. I think that there's a lot of virtue to that. I think you're talking truth to power. And my Woody Nuts is right aligned with that. And that's, men in open-toed shoes. What are you nuts? Hey, guys, put those dogs away. I don't want to see those hectic cuticles.

It looks like you've been tilling the field with your toes. Ugh, enough. And you know what? And shout out to a lot of people in my life who are men who wear thong shoes. I'm not with it. Cover those puppies up. Put on air max when you're at the beach. Swim in water shoes.

I don't want to see man feet ever. I just don't. Now, for those of you, I heavily disagree. Now, for those of you that are looking for a nice open-toed shoe, I have two recommendations, okay? The first is, if you like the traditional haviana, thong, whatever, I highly recommend that you take a look at a reef. The brand reef, they're old school, you go to the beach. Yeah, check out some cargo shorts while you're at it.

They're fantastic. Second is, and this is a little bit harder to find, I found. A Birkenstock copycat. Oh, here we go with the Na-O. At the Fokka-Ta-N-ROT. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Now, O'Burkenstock copycat at Target, 999, they're blue and they're rubber.

I have a... Oh, and you are... You have them, and you're complaining about men with open-toed shoes. Or, what do you do? What do you do? What are you do? That should be the what-of-you-nuts. That should be the what-a-nots.

We're wearing open-toed shoes with socks. I wear them in the gym. locker room because I'm not disgusting. No, I don't wear them with socks. I wear them if I want it into the schvitz. When I see people with their bare foot in the schvitz, I go, that is Wart City waiting to happen. You're nuts.

It is. You're nuts. It is. I've actually, this is TMI and then we'll hop off. I've had a wart on the bottom of my foot for a couple months now. I haven't dealt with it. It's not growing. It's sedentary, but it's there.

You know what you're going to have to do. I've had this stunt. Not good. Mort removal? You're going to have to go to the bed. podiatrist. I try. You can get the at home remedies. They don't work. Okay? You can do it like you're living on the planes. Okay, you can do a little pioneer medicine, put duct tape over it, but you're going to have to put duct tape over it for like weeks on end. You're going to have to

starve it from air. You starve the wart. You starve it. You suffocate the ward. And eventually, hopefully it falls off. Not going to work. What you're going to have to do is you're going to have to go in to the doctor and the podiatrist is going to numb around. it, then she's going to shave it. She's going to shave it. She's going to shave it off. It's so gross. With a blade. Or freeze it. She's going to freeze it, then shave it. And then, you ready for this? Because it's not going to go away.

She's going to eat it? She's going to give you a prescription for a cream that you're going to have to put on for months, maybe a couple weeks. And you're going to look up that cream. And you know what it's going to come up positive for? Kemo. It's chemo cream. It's a literal chemotherapy cream that, because basically a fungus is why. what, a fast splitting cell, the way that cancer is a fast splitting cell that wants to multiply, that wants to grow. And so you need to curve it. I literally brought that prescription to my local ride aid.

They were like, this is going to be $9,000. I'll live with the wart. They were like, oh, no, but they're like, that's for the big size. Like, we found one for 90. But I was like, sheesh. Wow. All right. So I'm fucked with this wart.

No, but you got to, you got to get on it. I got to go. I just had one removed like two weeks ago. And my dermatologist said, who have you been kissing? Because it was like near my mouth. And I was like, and I could have listed, you know, the like 18 people. But I was just like, I don't know. You keep a list.

No, I'm kidding. And then he says, quote, maybe this is my waddy nuts. He says, if you kissed me, I wouldn't get a wart. What the hell? Straight up said that to me in his office. This was our first time ever meeting. I think that's like not okay Or legal

We're literally We're literally gonna hop off this podcast And sue his ass I'm so down Hold on is he a babe I mean Marshall You can marry a nice doctor Not my type

But took the word away So yeah that's my what are you nuts I guess Holy smokes Just reminded me Yeah Well Take us away That's our show

That's our That's our show folks If anybody's doctor tries to kiss him Call the cops Call the cop This episode was five stars. They all are, but this one really was. Rate at five stars.

It's what we deserve. Marshall's going to look into if you haven't been able to. Try again. Try again. I'm sure that you can. I'm sure that you were just doing it wrong. You are typically the problem, not us. Okay?

You heard that you, not us. Listen, Spotify, Apple, wherever you get your podcast, watch us on Josh's YouTube. You got to watch us. We're so much more animated. You got to see my mangyna. Otherwise, you can't see my angina if you're listening. But I sure can and yikes. You just have to imagine.

have to imagine it. You want to see it to believe it. It's here, folks. It's breathing. It's alive. And watch us Mondays and Thursdays. We'll see you next time. Please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode.