Good Guys - FIFA, Fatherhood & Fake Girlfriends

Episode Date: July 2, 2026

Mazel morons! Fatherhood looks a little different for each Good Guy. Josh shares why Father's Day has quietly become his favorite holiday, while Ben recaps the perfect day with Ruby- a trip to the Natural History Museum, and a massage worthy of Dad of the Year. Plus: Ben reviews a James Taylor concert, Josh takes his boys to the FIFA Club World Cup opener, the guys debate arriving early vs. fashionably late, discuss why nobody approaches people at bars anymore, and hand out "What Are You Nuts?!" awards to overzealous political canvassers and one very confused Drake & Josh fan. Rate us five stars and watch the full episode on Spotify! What are ya nuts?! Love ya!  Write us! Send your messages to [e-mail]  Follow us on Instagram and TikTok!  Sponsors: Please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode. Produced by Dear Media. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The following podcast is a Dear Media production. Two Jews, both big and tall, no subject, too small for the good guys. A mother's dream, premium podcast team, make it your weekly routine, it's a good guys. And if you don't give us five stars, what are you nuts? What are you nuts? Yeah, we're the good guys. We're not the great guys. Miles and morons, welcome.

back to the Good Guys podcast. Welcome back. Yeah, that's right. We're here. We're alive. We're fathers, Josh. And I think we'd be remiss not to talk about Father's Day. Okay.

Perhaps it was last week. Perhaps it was three weeks ago depending on when we release this episode. But what I will tell you is that you can't keep us down. Okay. This is our freaking day. And you think we're not going to talk about it? Of course we're going to talk about it. Josh, I want to know, what did you do?

on Father's Day? I got to say that Father's Day is quickly becoming my favorite holiday. Makes sense to me. It's really like, it's so, okay, I got it. So your birthday, right? Your birthday's about you, but there's a mortality aspect, right? You're getting older. Sure.

You know, and then it's also, what do you want to do? What do you want to do? What do you want to do? Are we going to do? You're going to regret if you don't do. Should we do? We should do, by the way. But yeah, I digress.

There's a lot of buildup. Father's Day is so easy because basically the ethos is, let's do but not too much, right? Yes. Let's do but not, like what's something, and I'm the king of not too much. You can see in my performance. You know, my acting work, but, you know, like my wife's like, how about this? We'll have a barbecue in the evening at my parents' house, so we'll, you know, honor her father, my father-in-law,

Baruch Hashem. And if you want to go, work out, I'll order donuts in the morning. I know you love that. Maybe we'll go, you know, me, I love a field trip within the city limits, right? I love a little mission. So I get fed, and you will soon too. I get fed all these, like, kids activities on my phone. SoCal play days.

It's like great, great parks and things and fun. And I just love it. So in Highland Park, California, which is like above Dodger Stadium, basically the whites have come in and we've totally gentrified it. But it's a gorgeous historic Latin area that is so cool and cultural. And unfortunately, we're kind of ruining it. But it's still great. And so they have this old school. like soda and candy warehouse.

So you go in and it's like all these throwback drinks, old Hershey bars, old like kids' toys, and they had to make your own soda bar. Okay, how good is this? You can choose the level of carbonation you want in your sparkling water. It's hot. Wow, that's fancy. My wife went mild. Me and my son Max, we said we want heavy.

If one is good, 10 is better. That's the outcome. How are those burps? The burps were burping. At a 10 on the carbonation scale, you're getting a hot dog you ate three weeks ago. It's coming up and it's and it's yummy. Yeah, I was burping my face off. Max, I did an interesting blend, which was apple cranberry.

I did Granny Smith apple cranberry syrup. A little light cranapple was delish. Max did pineapple coconut. I'm like, dog, that's a pinocalada, homie. I was like, and look at the taste on this guy. That's a very refined palate. Yeah, pineapple coconut is very refined. I'm proud of him.

That's good stuff. I'm like, what'd you do? Max, he's like, Bergamont. And then shy fucked it all up. Shy basically made a suicide and it was wretched. But we had the best time. It was so nice. And then we went back and had a nice little lunch or had a nice dinner.

And what'd you do? So first, before I get into what I did, that sounded amazing. And I'm just going to say a light, what are you nuts? I love that that was your day. My day was very similar. Or what are you nuts? is spending Father's Day without your kids. Right.

Like people do that. I'm like, what did you do for Father's Day? Oh, I golfed. It's like you can golf, I would hope, any other time. Like the idea of Father's Day is like being celebrated by your children and being with your children. I think. And I think it's a wedding and that's not to be with your kids. I woke up in the morning.

We split the day. Morning, me, Claudia and Ruby. Afternoon, me, Claudia, Ruby, my parents, my sister. In the morning, we woke up. We went to the greatest museum in the world, Josh. I'm just going to say that, okay? The Natural History Museum is outstanding. I don't know the last time you've been.

It is, and it makes sense because they have so much money. But let me tell you, the way they put it to work, the building, the, I felt almost like I was at a zoo. that's the level of art that goes into these installations. And I had forgotten. I hadn't been since I was a kid. Like you walk through a beautiful exhibit and you see a white shark. And the way that they have just, they've made the installation look like you're looking at a white shark who's frozen in time. It doesn't look like a painting.

It's amazing. This place is amazing. Now, let me ask you, because I'm real stupid. Yeah. I've always wondered this about a natural history museum. Are the animals taxidermy? or are they completely artificial? So this is an excellent question, Josh.

I have no idea. I have no idea. I bet I does. But Claudia and I, I'll take it up one notch. We went into the dinosaur exhibit area where they show bones and bones. The fossils are real. The fossils are real, but is the whole build real? Like, yeah, they didn't get every vertebrae.

No, no way. It's impossible. It looks perfect. After what a billion years? It looks perfect. No, they probably threw in one real bone and the rest of it's not real. But yeah, I don't, I have to assume that it's not taxidermied. I think it is 100% fake.

Let's see. Okay, well, if we're talking about the Natural History Museum of L.A. County, the Why would we be talking about that? Okay. It's fun. It's good. I've been there like five times. So if we're talking about the Natural History Museum of Dayton, Ohio, then yes, they are real and caught recently.

Okay. Yes, the vast majority of the animals in the famous mammal halls are real taxidermy specimens, not artificial models. Wow. Wow. That's really cool. Okay. Yeah. I mean, it looks like it.

They're legit as hell. This is a glorious place, Josh. I absolutely loved it. Ruby loved it. I don't know if it's all the stretching that I've been doing, but I put the great Ruby on my shoulders. I was able to get him behind. Wow.

He went up nice and high near the big whale, big sperm whale. Oh, it was fantastic. And then he went down for a nap and I treated Daddy to a massage. Oh, what a rub I got while the Rubin was sleeping. This is an unbelievable back rub. I got home. He was still sleeping. We then went to my parents.

I ordered $500 in Tao. We ate a bunch of sushi and celebrated my dad, who earlier in the day we went to the best, the Ralph Lauren on 72nd in Madison. This is the most beautiful store I've ever been to. Went and got him a couple of a cardigan and a nice shirt. He loved it. Maybe he's returning one.

Who knows? Gave him the gift receipt. But this is a wonderful day. That sounds just fabulous. So your dad's birthday was the same day as father's day? The next day. So we had three days of Bruce. Okay.

I call it the Bruce trilogy, Benjamin. I love that he did the voice. I posted him on Instagram for his birthday. Like him like drinking a bourbon lemonade that he made saying, how easy is that? And the comments, this is another what do you nuts? Disgusting. Calling him a daddy saying Bruce can get it. Just because he can get it doesn't mean you have to say it to my face.

He can get it. He can, though. He has such beautiful flowing hair. My mother's a lucky woman. My father's a lucky man. My mother's beautiful as well. I thought you were going to say that people were commenting on my impression and how wrong it is. They were also saying that.

They were saying I never, based on what I heard, I never thought this is what Bruce looked or sounded like. And it was really funny. That's so good. Well, his voice is a little, and I say this with love, a little zestier in real life? Or was that just the Aina impression? It was the Aina impression, but he's a zesty fella. I mean, the apple doesn't fall far from the tree.

We're zesty men. Me too. We're zestin, Josh. I saw this TikTok the other day that said, if you see a boy who's kind of cute and you also think he's kind of gay, it'll probably be your husband. Yeah.

Oh, that's nice. It's true, right? Like, that's us. That's 100% us. Kind of cute, kind of gay. Kind of cute, kind of gay. Hella. Zesty.

Okay? The name of season four of the Good Guys podcast. Hella zesty. This episode of the Good Guys podcast is brought to you by our friends at ChiliPad by Sleep Me. All right, morons, listen up because this one's for every single one of you who is still sweating through your sheets while your air conditioning is cranked down to the lowest possible setting. Your wife is wrapped up like a burrito under 17 blankets. You're lying there next to a jubes.

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So yeah, Monday was his birthday and Monday we had dinner. We went to Maya, which is a delicious Mexican restaurant. Fantastic. Okay. And then Tuesday night, I took him to see the great James Taylor at Jones Beach. Let me tell you, Josh, James Taylor is no longer great and Jones Beach is too far. Okay? Out too far.

I love James Taylor. Love him. Josh, have you ever been to a concert that had two acts? Say more. An intermission for 30 minutes in the middle. He played eight songs, none of which anyone had heard of or remembered. James Taylor has like eight to ten killer songs. Banger.

Killer. Caroline in my mind. Sweet baby James. How sweet it is to be loved by you. Fire and rain. You've got a friend. Okay? First of all, he didn't play half of those.

What? Second of all, he played, yeah, yeah, Josh, yeah. And my dad said maybe it's because he's older and he doesn't like the way that he sounds on some of those tracks anymore. But yeah, he didn't play You've Got a Friend. Was he, um, uh, acoustic or did he have a band backing him? He had a band backing him.

Some of it was acoustic. Every song he changed guitars. Which like, can't we be efficient here? Can you play three straight songs? with one guitar, then the next three with the next guitar. Every song, after every song you change guitar. Every song. It's like these rockers with all those pedals.

Oh, you know distortion. It's not that hard. Okay. Oh, you're distorting. It's not that hard. Play it like it sounds. By the way, by the way, throw on Spotify and lip sync. That's all I needed out of Great James.

That's it. That's it. Yeah, Josh. So it was a little bit disappointing. Bruce had a great time, which is really all that matters. Jones Beach, the weather was fantastic. But Josh, this is a far venue. It's 50 miles.

No, that's not right. It's 60 minutes, maybe 27 miles, but in traffic. It's far. It's not close to the city. It's far. Well, growing up, that was like people would elect to go to Jones Beach over the Jersey shore, which I never understood. My people are from Jersey, so we always made the Shal.

but I guess that's at least an hour too. Yeah, Jersey, Jersey Shore is a little bit further. Technically, it depends on what part of the city you're in. I guess if you're in downtown Manhattan, it's a little bit closer. If you're in northern Manhattan, it's a little bit further. But Jones Beach, you run into that Long Island traffic, you're screwed. But it's a beautiful venue on the water, completely outside amphitheater, which we don't have that many of those.

So it's a lovely venue. I'm just saying it's a little bit far. It is far. It's a shame. Look, James Taylor is an icon of all icons. First of all, the muse of Carol King. Need I say more. The great Carol King, Jewish excellence.

Also, the first person to be signed to Apple Records, the Beatles record label. Really? And he's, yeah, dude, and I hate to say this because he's literally my favorite artist. But I saw Stevie Wonder in the last 10 years. and I was like, because I wanted to be able to say I saw him and I was like, it's okay. I didn't need to at this time. He's still an icon and a legend. But like, I want to remember him through his albums and his earlier stuff, I think.

Yeah, it's the same thing. I wonder if, so if they're touring for them, which it's very like common knowledge, the fastest way to die is to stop doing what you love and to stop work. Sure. Like, people say that they lose their minds the second they stop working. So if these guys are touring for them, I love it. If you're touring for me, because you, I don't, I don't need it anymore. And if you need money, I'd much rather set up like a go fund me or something.

No. No. I'll pay him and not go. I don't need to see that again. I don't need to see it again. I really don't. I know. And I'm sorry.

I love James. I love him. I don't need to see him again. There's no accounting for T's, though, because I promise you there were plenty of people who left that venue going there has never been a greater performance of what we just saw. You're right. I'm also, I'm turning into such just like an old pessimist Jew. Because everything sucks. We literally, we left.

I was so excited. I got my dad to leave before the encore. And as we got in the car and we're driving away, I'm like, this is the best part of the concert that we, You're going to beat all the traffic. And he looked at me like I was fucking nuts. Josh. And then in the back of here, in my mind, I'm going to care. Literally, I forget what song it was.

It was my late and favorite song. I see fire and now see rain. Get in the car. This is such a buddy of nuts thinking about it. We're literally, like, I looked up the set list, and my aunt passed away when I was one, his sister, and her favorite song, I'm blanking on what it was, like was the first song of the encore.

My dad's like, tomorrow's her birthday, can we see it? I'm like, get in the car. It's your aunt, my sister, Davina. This was Davina's song, Benjamin. Dad, open the door. And closer! My beloved sister, she would listen to this when she would make her parochies. My dear Davina would play bridge while listening to James Taylor saying on the hot coal railway.

I don't know. Oh my God. I have to look up what song it was. It's going to bother me. It's going to bomb me. James Taylor set. list, 26. I'm sure a lot of people Googled that.

Oh, my God. Dude, how could you do this? This is like going after Mickey Mantle. Secret of life. The secret of life is enjoying the passage time. Is that how the song goes? Yeah, it's a lovely song. Beautiful.

Beautiful. A little, you know. And by the way, that's one of his best. All right, we got to move on. It's too much James Taylor Slander. Wow. I'm sorry, James. I'm sorry.

I really do love you. And let me tell you, we have such a special relationship, me and my dad surrounding James Taylor, because he would sing instead of sweet baby James. He would sing sweet baby Ben. I now sing sweet baby Ruby. At one point, I even sang sweet baby Claudia when she couldn't fall asleep. That song is a big song for us.

And he didn't fucking play it. Okay? It wasn't even on his set list. I just have to say that it's so nice that you have reverie for great music of the past and future like James Taylor because my wife has had a nonstop earworm for the worst social media music ever. If I have to hear in my house one more time, you never take me to Bangladesh. What? What is you never take me to Bangladesh? You don't know this? Oh my God. It's hot, hot, hot on the charts. I'm not by the way, I'm not surprised that you never take me

to Bangladesh. Oh my God. It's like the 200th place that I'd take. You there's a song on TikTok where a guy's going, you never take me to Bangladesh. You never made me sausage on an open flame. You're lying. I'm not doing it. I'm not doing it justice. Hold on. You need to hear it.

Here, hold on. Is this going to get us demonetized? If this gets us demonetized, I'm going to lose it. Okay, ready? That's fine. Ready? This song is playing in your home. Dude, my wife, and now my kids are singing it all the time.

And then they're also singing this brickin, it's all an earworm. Nice, groovy. By the way, I couldn't hear it at all, but I didn't want to just sing that song for me. down in San Juan, Puerto Rico. Oh, I know that song. I know that song. Wait, so are both of them AI? Because the second one's AI.

The Puerto Rico one? Yeah. Thanks a lot, Sam Altman. Yeah, fully AI. There's like an app, sumo or something, where you can, like, make these songs. I made a Nick's song. You're...

I made a Nick's song. I made a song. A Nix punk rock song. Oh, God. Do you want to hear it? No. No. Are you sure?

No. No. Are you sure? No. I have to find it. I'll judge you. I have to find it. I have to find it.

I have to find it. It is like that halacious Jesse Itsker, whatever his name is song. Go New York. Go New York. I can't. I have to find it. What's his name, Jesse, Sarah Blakely's husband? Yeah, it's quits.

No, it's not. You just completely, oh my God. You Jew faced his last name. It's Ler. It's Ler. Oh my God, this is a, can you hear? No, you know what? It's that Zoom setting.

Where it cuts out music. It's so annoying. But I want to hear I was raised on losing seasons Blue and Orange every night 17 and 65 And I still said we'd be all right I defended every

I defended every rockster like you Oh, this sucks. He's trash. See, we're at the chorus one second. Oh, God, I'm so sorry, listening. They're going to love it. It's so good. You can find this on Spotify.

You don't even have to pay for it. They'll pay you to listen. This is the first song with Spotify, it's you to listen to it. You don't have to be it. I can't believe I never said it, Steve. When the Knicks are, 25 and 90 next season.

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Wow. Okay. So that happened. That definitely happened. That was a great 10 minutes. That was a moment in our lives. Glad everyone could go take a pee break during the pod. What, um,

Ben, be real. what if the Knicks don't even make the playoffs next season? What happens then? I'm ready to be a fan of a different team. My quest has ended. It has. Oh, yeah. Like, it's funny.

I don't need them to ever do anything ever again. Right. I'm good. I'm good. In fact, me trying to chase that high again is so completely unrealistic. I don't care. if they're dog shit forever, I got mine.

That's right. It's done. That's it. I'm thrilled. People are like, it could be a dynasty. It's like the chances of the Knicks being a dynasty. No.

Please. Okay, let's not, let's not overshoot. We somehow won the championship. It doesn't even make any sense. The Knicks aren't supposed to win championships. Okay? They're just not.

It's like a Jewish basketball player dunking. We're not supposed to do that. So when it happens, like we celebrate it. It's very exciting. But then we don't expect it again. This is what happened with me being a lifelong Los Angeles Kings hockey team fan,

which in 2012 we had a historic season. We beat the New Jersey Devils and we became Stanley Cup winners for the first time ever. Mind you. Wow. We had Wayne Gretzky on our team, okay? Wow.

So we had all. all the help we needed and we still couldn't do it. But up until that, being a king's fan was like just a lot of heartache. Cut to the next year we lose the year after, we win again. Okay. And I got to say since then, I have to remind myself of like, what are you doing daring having any hope for the Kings? This is no shame on my beloved Kings. It just is what it is. They've gone back to their king's ways shout out respect they're a bunch of dirty dogs like i like my hockey players and they're trying to win will they maybe not but i'm still going to root but like the fact that i expect them to win another stanley cup soon i think i'm being selfish i think i'm being greedy

as we're talking about sports josh are you into this world cup i'm so glad you brought it up I attended the opening match at SoFi Stadium with my beloved boys. Tell us about that experience, Josh. So I really don't, while you, and I respect this about you, Ben, you have decided that live events are worth spending the money for? Yes. I have not. Understood.

And I don't. Understood. It's mostly because I love the TV experience and I think it's superior. and 95% of the things. Agreed. That being said, it was such a once-in-a-lifetime moment. I love soccer. It was in my backyard.

I don't live far from SoFi where the stadium was that had the opening match in America, America versus Barraway. Beautiful country. Barrowe. Oh, Paraway. Barrowe. Beautiful.

So shout out the great FIFA hospitality. They were able. I was able to secure me plus one for my oldest son. I said, I can't do this to my dear shy. Meyer, you don't get to come. You're one. You can't appreciate this. Yes.

But my dear shy, you're three. You're not going to really care either, but at least you can have bragging rights that you went. Yes. Yes. We drive up. FIFA hospitality comes through. They go, you and your two sons may come, I said. Wow.

This is FIFA. Beautiful. You guys know how to make a video game and you know how to make dreams come true. You know? Yes, they do. And somewhere in the middle you do soccer. But I'm all about the video games in my life. Me too.

Me too. And so we drive up to SoFi. And I got to tell you this is really, and I think this is sort of anti the way you and I approach things. But I got to say it's kind of better. They said to me, they were like, look, all we'd like is for you to do walk down the carpet and take a photo. And that's all we ask and maybe an Instagram story. I said, kidding me. Please.

You know. Asked for more. Yeah, reciprocity here. But they said the carpet closes at 4.30, so we need you there around 4. But the game doesn't start until 6. Sorry. Sorry. Oh, my God.

The match. So, but you know what? Everyone was like, Josh, this is going to be Super Bowl level security. Like, it is going to be at a level you have not experienced. So if you don't get there early, you're done anyway. So we left the house like at three we picked up young shy from preschool at 315 me and max we drove to sofi We get there. It was a flippin breeze. We walk through the carpet. It's now like 415 There was a 45 minute wait on the merch line that's how many people were in line to get merch

But am I stressing no we're early I go to the snacks I'm going things it was like so nice because you know I I just, everything I do, it's like I'm so tight and white knuckling and rushed. And this is like, we'll get the merch. We'll get food. And we'll still make it to our seats on time. It's kind of a leak. I guess so.

It's not your way, is it? No. No, hearing that, it's like a nightmare. It's like, what am I going to do for two hours before the game? But I guess you're right. I guess you wait on the merch line, get some food. I guess you could just. Smell the roses and not think about what you'd be doing with your time back.

But I suppose it's a way of existing. I know, you know, very, very sarcastic. But like, think about it, right? I know you. So that means from five to six, you're white knuckled stressed in that car. You are because you're in gridlock traffic, praying that parking is going to work. Then the moment you're out of the car, you're like, let's go. Oh, Ruby, on the shoulders, flexibility, right?

And you're rushing, rushing, rushing. Then you're like, fuck, I want to get some merch. I know you loved your New York Knicks merch. You're like, that's out, right? Because you show up five minutes before. It's an hour and a half line. You're done. So, like, we're not going to get the merch.

There's no food. And I was just stressed for an hour. Or I could have come earlier and just not been stressed and enjoy this like once in a lifetime thing. No? I think that go, I think that. I think that the, I think that going with kids changes the whole equation. I agree with you that going with kids, you show up early, you do the experience.

This is me and you going. I'm showing up right before. Oh, I didn't get FIFA merch. I'm going to be okay. Okay. I'm going to watch a beautiful match. I'm going to go home. I'm actually going to leave.

I'm telling you I'm leaving in the middle of the second half. We did. Because I did. Okay. Good. Yeah. I'm leaving in the middle of the middle. the second half. And that's no shade to soccer. I did that. I forget what Islander game I went to.

The game was going to overtime. Out. That was the perfect time to leave. Because I can't sit. It's a disease. I can't sit in that traffic. I can't sit there for an hour trying to leave a stadium. It would, it ruins the whole experience for me. Totally. And we left during, you know, probably around like, minute 70, partly because by then it was almost eight and shy goes to bed then. And we got to see three goals from America. At this point, Paraguay hadn't even, they hadn't even scored yet. So it was like, oh, it was three zip US. Yes.

Oh, you went to a route. Isn't that gorgeous? That's the best. That's my baseball's fun. Like you could go up 18 nothing through five innings. You can leave. Yeah. You know no actions happening in six through nine.

Basketball's tougher because you never know. imagine I left that fucking Nick Game, Game 4. There's a version of me. It wouldn't have been the NBA finals. Regular season I would have left. Of course. Down 29 at the half? Please.

I would have left. I would have left. Yeah, man. I think it's like, because also what are you trading that hour? I see it with all the OGs in my life. They're like, I'd rather be 20 minutes early and not be stressed the whole way there. Then like what are you like what are you trading? That's what I wanted.

Like, am I trading a couple extra emails, a little more scrolling, another half hour the show I was watching? Like, what am I really missing out on and exchanging it to be stressed? I think you're right. I definitely think that you're right. And I think that it is maturity is about better time management and setting expectations of the people around you, even if it's not what you just said, even if it's legitimate work. you have a lot of work to do legit work.

Just take a half day. Take a half day because you know that you have something that's going to stress you out if you don't. Finish working at one. I'm totally with you, especially if you're something that's once in a lifetime. FIFA at home, World Cup. This is once in a lifetime, for sure.

It was beyond. And you know, that's, I agree with you. That's the thing, too. I'm learning about the great David Epstein has a book coming out that he's been promoting. And he talks about the time fallacy. the time expectation fallacy. He's like, things never take less time than we think.

Almost there's no task. He's like, we always give ourselves too little time. He's like, so give yourself a goal of one, maybe two things for the day. He's like, because once those are completed, anything else is bonus. But there's a good chance that those things will be the only things you get done that day.

But you hit your goal. I mean, that's what like monster CEOs do. Like they will have like one actually important thing to do that day. Right. And as long as they got that thing that is really important done, they moved the business forward. Yeah, the person like me with literally like a chicken scratch list of 250,000 things that when I don't check them all off, I'm cryptically stressed,

I could use better time management for sure. This episode is brought to you by Starbucks. Josh, have you ever seen a more gorgeous beverage? Do you know what this is? First of all, it's the summer. I'm ready to enjoy myself, but I need a cold drink to define me. So I'm all in just a disclaimer, go Ben. This tropical butterfly refresher is honestly like an award-winning painting. I've never seen anything like it. I feel like I'm in East Hampton. It's 8 o'clock. I turned to my wife. I said, let's go to the beach. Let's prioritize us.

all of a sudden, I see this drink. This is it, Josh. This is a happy summer. This is a happy summer. And you know what? You're in East Hampton. I'm in the carpool line at my kids camp. My wife's frustrated with me.

We've been dealing with I can't tell you what, but the truth is I go, I need a little something to pep up my day. Tropical refresher, boom. It's gorgeous. This is the pep in my step that I need. Josh, can we give this a taste? Let me try this.

Too late. Too late. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God. Oh my God.

It is so freaking good. Oh, my God. Are you getting those guava and passion fruit flavors coming through? That's exactly what I'm getting. This is- I had a feeling passion fruit. You know what? They are actually, I think they're mango pineapple flavored pearls.

Oh my God. Oh my God. I mean, it makes drinking fun, right? Like I'm so tired of just like hitting the straw, getting the liquid. I want a little something like a little surprise. you know? This is the most delicious drink I've ever had.

And if you want yours, you can order it on the Starbucks app. Every day, I wake up, I put my order on the app. I go there, it's ready. This is literally ready. This drink is literally your summer cheat code. It's tropical, it's refreshing, like us. I got a nice thank you here. Sometimes I get a, you know, like a little inspirational quote.

Oh, Starbucks, wow. Delicious. So good. Unlock all the best summer. memories with the tropical butterfly refresher at Starbucks. Should we get into some weird news? We should. Josh, did you see that on Polly Market, you can trade who the Spotify top global artists

is going to be? Did you see this? Look, with Polly Market, I'd be trading left and right. It's fun for me, but tell me, who are we thinking? I mean, I went to a James Taylor concert last night at Jones Beach, and I'm not going to lie. I think he might win new artist of the year. This like new hit song, how sweet it is to be loved by you. One of my favorites.

Might just, might just win, okay? It might, he might be, like, I know he's probably an underdog, okay, in the polls, okay? But then you can trade for some good stuff, Josh. I think I'm going James Taylor, you? Look, right now, Bad Bunny is at the top of the list. But I think people are sleeping on. soldier boy, you know? I agree. I think soldier boy.

And maybe, maybe Josh, we could get soldier boy on a James Taylor song. What a collab. Like when Elton John and Eminem did something. Correct. You know, Rock goodbye, sweet baby James. How about rock goodbye sweet baby soldier boy. Yeah. Tell him.

Soldier boy up in my mind of Ming Carolina. Oh my God, but seriously, you can trade. It's a bad bunny. Look at this list. Drake, Taylor Swift, Bruno Mars. I mean, Bruno Mars, I think Bruno's a good trade, Josh. I think Bruno's a good trade. You know, tell me, is Polymarket it's available on the U.S. App Store, yes?

I mean, I think it's straight popping. It's available on the U.S. app store, and you can trade on culture, entertainment, and more all in one place. Josh, you just got to download the app and use code Good Guys for a free $50 to get started. And you know what else? On the Spotify top global artists of 2026, right now on Polly Market, Drake is trending. Is it Drake the rapper? Is it my Drake Bell? You'll have to go and see, won't you?

California cities dominate national catfish rankings as major West Coast Hub takes the crown of shame. There may be plenty of fish in the sea, but a new survey says, West Coast singles are getting hooked by catfish. That's right. San Francisco was ranked second in the nation as San Diego tied for third with Las Vegas. But number one was, I'm sure the New York Post where this is from is going to make this super easy for me to find. Seattle took the crown of shame with a not so perfect score of 100 with nearly 94% of locals saying they had been catfished online. Wow, what's going on in the West Coast that people, it's very, very rare that you hear on the East Coast somebody was catfished.

I don't know, I don't know anybody that was catfished. Like catfishing is specific to dating, correct? It's not just like being swindled to sign up for a credit card or like somebody trying to get your banking information. Being catfish is specifically related to you thought there was an eligible. bachelor or bachelor's at on the other side of this exchange, correct? Yeah, let's call it romantic. Okay, so yeah, I don't know anybody that has been romantically catfished. Do you?

I don't. I've been catfished. We talked about this with Neve Shulman. Yes, yes, yes. The great Neve Shulman, where I just, this person appeared in my life when I was like 19, like texting me and they were so good because it made me feel like I had met them before. I did an event or something. And then we chatted for like over a year.

But it would just be like passing tax. And then like on a random drunken Saturday night, sometimes we get like a little saucier. And then basically I was like when I would be in New York, I'd be like, hey, we should go grab dinner or something. And somehow something always came up. Yeah. It's interesting.

Yeah. And then I told you one time because I was lit Josh Peck, I was like trying to find some weed in the city. Got any connects? And she was like, for sure, my friend will meet you at Dwayne Reed. And I was like, sick. Weed is lit. And I met her friend.

And I think maybe it was her. And she gave me some marijuana. And I don't know. How fun is that? I know. You know what I do to get in a 2002 Honda Civic with a $20 bill in my palm? fear for my life, shake a hand and pop out and get some good gong. It's too easy now. That's why I don't smoke, Josh. That and many other reasons. The thrill was a part of it. What, I'm going to go to my

local dispensary meet Ted and pick up a 20 bucks in weed. No, no fun. It's not fun. No good. No fun. No, I like the rush. I like the rush. Is there, we got to, there's another, yes, I'm happy to hit you with another story, which is desperate singles beg cute men to approach them at bars. Can you all please start going out? The New York Post reports as fed up singles swipe endlessly on dating apps or hire pricey matchmakers to find their happily ever after, it's fair to say that the days of meeting a potential suitor at a bar are long gone. So yeah, basically ladies are begging cute boys to actually approach them at bars. We're in a tough spot, Josh, with the rise of GLPs. Shout out Roe. We love you. Sure do. I,

people are drinking way less. In turn, people are going to bars less because, like, the real attraction of a bar is liquor. And then an event and meeting people, sure. But you're missing that social lubricant. And I just think that with AI and with our phones and with there's so much social anxiety and I don't know, we got to write the ship. But I'm certainly happy I'm not single today.

Absolutely. And I think you just got to, like, get over it. mean, it's so trite, but this was the thing when I was like an insecure, you know, young man trying to meet like a cute girl. It was like, my boy was like, bro, just put up numbers, dog. He's like, he's like, put up numbers. Don't be afraid of no, my G. And boy, was it helpful. No, that's unbelievable advice. It really is. It really is because a lot of people are very scared, myself included. I can remember a time.

I was petrified to put up numbers. Like you just got to try. You got to put yourself out there. Remember, it's not a reflection on you. They're a stranger. Like, and you could even be like, it's good advice. Let's assume you're a hard six.

You're like not that cute, but you're not ugly. You're just like fine. Like you could be someone's flavor or not. But it's not personal. It really isn't. Yeah. Even if you're a little fat.

It's no big deal. Especially if you're a little fun. I feel like that's more in lately. Yeah. God. I'm 188. A little fat. I wish I was a little fat.

You are. I'm a lot fat. You're not. No, I'm a lot fat. No, you're not. I think so. You know what? It upsets me when I watch the pod back and I see those gams out.

Now, I hate you in shorts. But, no, I like you in shorts. I hate you in shorts on the pod. But you have beautiful legs. Thank you, darling. It's way too hot to not be. in shorts. What am I going to do? We're sweatpants. You'd see, you'd be, I'd be sweating. Put on tearaway pants that are licensed by fanatics and have them off to the pot and rip them off

as you walk out. Or I could do what you do, which is sit at a nice desk. This is a lot, this is lovely. Then I could wear whatever. I don't even know if you're wearing pants. And we're keeping it that way, hon. Should we get to Woody and Nuts? We should. Our folks are, What are you in this moment of the week? Is our gripes with people, places and things both big and tall, whatever, sticking in your craw, I'll tell you what's sticking in my craw, Josh. Tell me. I guess we're electing a new congressman in New York. And the only reason I know that, no, this isn't political at all.

The only reason I know, the only reason I know that is because incessantly on both sides, I'm being stopped every single day. Would you like to hear about Alex Boris? No, I don't. I don't want to hear about him. I didn't even know. I don't know who he is. I don't know what he is. No, I don't want to hear about Alex Boris.

And then I go to the next one. It's like, would you like to hear about, no, I don't want to hear about anybody. I was just walk. I just parked my car. I'm just walking home. I don't want to hear about anybody. Okay. This one, Josh, it gets, goes up a notch.

I walk out of my building. I'm approached by a woman. She says, I'm ex-candidates mother. Do you have time to hear more about him? And I think, oh, you know, that's sure. Okay, I hear about it. I get to the next block. I get to the next block, Josh.

I'm so-and-so's mother. Would you like to hear more about his campaign? Are you kidding? Deceit. Deceit. Deceit. So it's a what-you-nuts. Stop telling you about a candidate.

I'm just walking on the street. I don't want to be met with politics when I'm just walking around. No, I don't want to hear about him. I don't want to hear about her. I don't want to hear about them. I don't care if you're their mother. I don't care. Woody-a-nuts?

I don't care either. My Woody-a-Nuts is the other day I was walking around on set. And this crew member comes up to me, he says to me, whoa, hey, man, you, you're from Drake and Josh, right? You're from Drake and Josh? I go, yeah, yeah, man, I am. He goes, what's your name? I go, Josh, I'm Josh. He goes, whoa, you played Josh, right?

Oh, God. I was like, what are you nuts? No. Oh, God. My name is Josh. should I play Drake? What are you crazy, dude? Come on.

Oh, God. Oh, God. No, the whole exchange. That's terrible. He was not a smart boy. No, he's just like he was probably trying to like somehow play it cool. Like, stop playing it cool people. It's not cool.

Okay? You like. You know what else isn't cool, Josh? You're not cool. No, I'm kidding. You know what else isn't cool, Josh? Not giving this episode five stars. That wouldn't be cool.

Listen to us wherever you get your podcast. especially Spotify. Watch on Spotify. The video is gorgeous. It's gorgeous. And you can listen to my new Nick's song that we play for 10 minutes on this podcast. No, you can't.

It's absolutely. Unless it's been cut out. Unless it's been cut out. Mondays and Thursdays, folks, we will see you. Bar-a-pa-pap-paw. Next time.