Good Guys - Is Timothée Chalamet King of the Knicks?

Episode Date: June 1, 2026

This week, we’re breaking down the true Benihana experience, debating whether Timothée Chalamet would secretly love the pod, and hyperfixating on Meghan Markle’s apricot preserves. Plus: Spencer Pratt’s mayoral campaign, naked gym locker room etiquette, lunchbox trauma, divorce fights over toaster ovens, and why Josh embarrassed himself in front of a Croatian flight attendant. What are ya nuts?! Write us! Send your messages to [e-mail]  Follow us on Instagram and TikTok!  Sponsors: If meetings are eating up your day, Granola is a no-brainer. You can try it totally free for three months - just head to granola.ai/goodguys.  If you’re looking for a better way to season and prepare everyday meals, you really need to try Diamond Crystal® Kosher Salt, a chef trusted, additive free salt made with light, flaky crystals for easy control, available online and nationwide at your favorite stores like Target, Kroger, Albertsons and more. Get a free 8-count Sample Pack of LMNT's most popular drink mix flavors with any purchase at drinklmnt.com/goodguys. Find your favorite flavor, or share with a friend. Hero Bread is offering 10% off your order. Go to hero.co and use code GUYS at checkout. For a limited time, Nutrafol is offering our listeners $10 off your first month’s subscription and free shipping when you visit Nutrafol.com and enter promo code GOODGUYS10 Right now, you can save up to $230 on the 12 piece cookware set vs buying the products individually. If you spend over $495 you will receive a Butcherbox for FREE. Plus if you spend over $795 you can also get a FREE cast iron grill pan! Visit Carawayhome.com/GOOD10 to take an additional 10% off your next purchase. This deal is exclusive for our listeners, so visit Carawayhome.com/GOOD10 or use code GOOD10 at checkout. Please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode. Produced by Dear Media. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The following podcast is a Dear Media production. Two Jews, both big and tall, no subject, too small for the good guys. A mother's dream, premium podcast team, make it your weekly routine, it's a good guys. And if you don't give us five stars, what are you nuts? What are you nuts? Yeah, we're the good guys. We're not the great guys. We're just so good guys.

the good guys podcast we did it again look at this it seem green twin zies what's that shirt you wear this is an excel wow and I'm large yeah it's the shoulders you brought shoulders you brought shoulders I don't know about that they look pretty broad no maybe no I have sloping shoulders my boxing coach as a kid would call me baby shoulders they're definitely sloping but that's just because you're big up here that's a good thing isn't it isn't sloping mean that you have a big upper area I wish I had more you know like Who walks around like Tom, Tom Hardy? Yeah. Big traps and big shoulders.

I need that. I just need to do this. Just get my shoulders back. How much better do I look now versus this? Well, that's everything. My acting teacher is always talking about that. No forward slumping energy. It's so hard.

How can I be funny sitting like this? I went to the scene and she goes, Josh, who am I? And she was like, I'm you. I was like, ow. Ouch. That was very unnecessary. She was right. You really feel like you can be just as funny.

sitting like this. I think this is like if I okay if I'm Tom Ford on a flight to Monaco I'm sitting like this the whole flight yeah hi I'm Tom Ford this is impossible hi hi hi I'm Tom Ford yeah right this is power hi I'm this is nebish this is I agree possible this is I'm barely making it but can you be funny sitting like this I'm having trouble I'm I'm uncomfortable I'm thinking a lot about my posture and oh i feel so much better i think it's just about backward energy yeah okay okay okay okay i'm down should we try tonight at benny hana that's right we're going to benny freaking hana i'm gonna i'm taking the sweet reuben and i'm looking at the chef and i'm gonna go hit me with a shrimp now yeah and as the shrimp comes towards my mouth i'm gonna lift up rubin

Hit him in the back of the throat Oh my God First time to Benahanas for Rubin Oh yeah First time And this is like We have a proper Eight person table

I haven't told you yet But two other folks are coming You know Shannon Ford Claude's friend Her and her husband are coming With their baby We got two freaking babies of Benny on What an honor

So we're sitting at a nice I think eight is the max We got an eight person We have our own table, own chef. That was always the tough part. You go to Benihana. You're sitting at this communal table. And then all of a sudden, you see, you know, I ordered the chicken fried rice.

You ordered the chicken fried rice. You got a little more freaking chicken, okay? Yeah. I didn't come with you, Suzanne. Right. Why do you have more chicken? Totally. This is not, like, don't make our things at the same time.

I'm one order. She's one order. Now I understand why they do it at the same time because that's just make sense. Sure. Right. Otherwise, it's a waste of time. You're going to make the same exact dish twice. Can you imagine if Benahana's was all a cart?

And they did eight separate cooking. Yeah, yeah. All right, this one's for Ben. Here we go. You're there. Onion Tower. I was going to say you're already there for three hours. Minimum.

Yeah. And also, look, we're going to say so much, so many positive things about Benihana. Okay. One negative thing. It's impossible to get the check. I'm ready to go. They're never there. Sure.

Every time I'm there. Also, I would say that there's a 90% chance that we see Tracy Morgan tonight. Really? I've seen him every time I've been to Benihana. We're going to Benahana. He lives there, I think. I think he lives there. I've seen him, I've seen him three or four times.

I'm going to eat some Benahana and get you pregnant. I want to see the Sharp track. Do that shit with the Onion Tower. He's so good. He's so good. And you just look, Game 4 in Philly. You're looking front row. there, Tracy Morgan.

Timorg. He's a, I think it's him. I guess you have to throw in Spikeley. Timothy Shalame is at the top. Nick's fandom. He's put himself at the top of the pyramid. It's fun. You now have Ben Stiller, who's also right there.

Right. You got Tracy Morgan. And over here, yeah, you got Spikeley, whatever. But this is the, this is really our triangle of. Yeah. The Trinette. Timothy. Timotee.

Timetay. He would be so good on the pod and he would love us and he'll never come on. Who knows? But yeah, there's a publicist who's thinking right now over my dead body. Yeah. Why do these publicists have to be the ultimate gatekeepers to these people? It's being power. It's fake.

They also, they need to like Kylie Jenner. I'm sure that no one ever would have thought that she would have gone on a podcast store. She's on a podcast store. Is she? Yeah. She did Kid Cuddy's podcast, who knew he had. a podcast, I guess because they're friends. She just did Jake Shane, which...

We love Jake. Jake's great. We're jealous of Jake. I'm just saying he's the best. If Kylie can do a podcast store, Timothy Shalemay can do a podcast store, it's all about what are they promoting and who do they need to reach, right? And so if we happen to catch him needing to reach, Yenta's in the Midwest, which, by the way, that's who's buying your stuff, Timmy.

Okay. Then maybe he'll come on. And yeah, there's so much we could talk about. He seems just like a great, fun, normal guy. He would, this would feel familiar to him, right? Definitely, definitely. He's going on the Today Show. He's going on Seth Myers.

This isn't fun. This isn't fun. This isn't fun. That isn't fun. This is fun. So Colbert's done, right? Yes. He's finished.

Yes. Last episode aired? I think so. Also, this was interesting, and maybe this is just me. You know, for the last week he did, his guest. guests were, and it should be, the last guest should be Letterman. I get that, right? Because he inherited the show from Letterman, Letterman, one of the greats ever.

But he interviewed every late night host, boring. Oh, he did all of them, I didn't see. Maybe, unless it hasn't come out of it, but that's, for the last week, it's like James Oliver, Fallon, Seth Meyer. This is interesting. Not at all. It's your last week. And also these, big favors.

I was going to say these are the interviewers. You're interviewing the interviewers? Yeah. That's not interesting. They're interviewing. They're not interviewees. Right. What are they going to say? They're going to ask you questions.

It's inside baseball. No, it's not going to be five nights in a row. That's not interesting. You should do a funny meetup, like a funny mashup of people. Yeah, one episode, everyone. Me and Megan Markle, can you imagine? Sure. I can't imagine.

I would, I mean. I've had her apricot preserves, Josh. Let me tell you. Okay. This is. Really? Oh, yeah. She crushes a preserve.

Crushed it. It literally showed up in PR. And for Claude, of course, I'm not getting Megan. All right. But she wasn't looking. I stole it. I tried it. Let me tell you, 35 calories, two tablespoons.

That felt totally fine. That's enough to put on toast. More than enough. Delicious. Really? You think she calls it apricot? That's such a good question. If you call it apricot, are you also saying, do you say aunt or aunt?

I say aunt. Okay, I say aunt. Do you say apricot or apricot? Apricot, apricot. Okay, I say apricot. See, this is right. Interesting. Do you say tomato or tomato?

Tomato. What am I from the UK? Do you say, I'm trying to think of others. Do you say, uh... Dad, please don't leave. I mean, if I was with, if I was with Megan Markle, first of all, I'd be like, house age. Yeah, she likes to call him age.

Does she? How's age? You know, that's he going to do it. Sounds like a drug. Yeah, he loves age. She loves H, who does it, you know? Like, Kay? Yeah.

As H, good. Tell me about Aitchie boy, you know, and I'd be like, hello, Dutchie, because, you know, she likes to tell her, she's so Mindy Kaling on her show. Like, actually, it's funny you call me that because I'm really the Duchess of Sussex or whatever. Like, really? We didn't know.

Yeah. You've told us, Megan. D. Yes. You've told us. Dutchie. Hello, Dutchie. That's what you get at the corner store when you're trying to roll a blunt.

Yeah. A Dutchy. A Dutchy. A Dutchy. Yeah. Driving up here, I saw a person ripping a blunt at 9.30 in the morning. Good for them. What's the rest of their day like?

Nothing. Because the weeds are really good now. No, the rest of their day is nothing. It's wandering. It's not like a one hitter where you could just maybe take a little mini hit and microdose yourself. You smoke in a blunt. They're toast. You're getting a sidekick to the face.

You know what's sad to know that I'm going to die not knowing how to roll a joint? I can never do it. You don't know how? My fingers just could never. do it. I could never figure it out. Could do it, you see? You think so? If I can do it, you can do it. And I'm not,

you know, I'm not known for my dexterity. I'm not talented with, I can't do this. People see me on the street, they go, not nimble. Yeah. But I could do it. You could. Okay. Yeah, I can do it. I used to, I, for a moment of douchebaggery, I did go through a hand-rolled cigarette phase. By the way, as you should.

I'm like, what are my fat Johnny Depp? Yeah. The fuck is happening. No, there was nothing cooler than just just having a sack of American spirits tobacco. That's right. And you had your own papers and you did it. And you convinced yourself, it's so much healthier because there's no filter. No, no good because it's natural.

Oh, natural, yeah. Yeah, but you start smoking in an American spirit. You're going to have to clear your week. Oh, you're done. You're toast. You're toast. Yeah, you're toast. But yeah, you got your little pegging.

You open it up and you're trying to have conversations about like, I don't know, fucking canvas tote bags. You're not listening to anybody. You're doing it. You're there. You're not listening to what they're saying while you're trying to roll your hand-rolled cigarette. You know, the amount of mental energy and attention to detail to roll, unless you get a passive roller. Can you pick? Are there, is there such thing? Some people can do single-handed.

It's wild. Seth Rogan's good at making many different joints, but I think when you have his level of success, fame, marijuana ingesting, you've perfected. You've perfected. You've spent time doing it. This episode of the Good Guys podcast is brought to you by our friends at Carrowe. Folks, you know, we love caraway here at the Good Guys podcast and let me tell you, okay, are you still looking for a father's day present? I'm just saying if this was Mother's Day, we'd be late. But if you're still looking for a Father's Day present, give the gift of Carraway. We're talking amazing, beautiful pans, ceramic coating, okay, healthy, we don't have any of these bad toxins in there. Carraway is it, okay? Carraway is it, and they look beautiful. Honestly, I love, they have this beautiful blue. I think

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and free shipping when you visit Nutraful.com and enter the promo code Good Guys 10. That's Nutra spelled N-U-T-R-A-F-O-L dot com promo code Good Guys 10. What do you think would happen if they did a one week or a one month moratorium on anyone famous talking about politics? Would we die? Oh, yes. No, I think the world would be a better place. I think it would be a much better place. Like, what if they were like, if you are not working in politics, you're not allowed to comment no matter how many followers you have?

Everyone in the world would be happier. Yep. and they would never let it happen. It's too profitable. Who is they? I guess you could start with just the news organizations, but I don't know how far up it goes. I know that a more chaotic world needs more structure.

A world that needs more structure needs people in charge. A world that needs people in charge keeps people in line, and it all flows. And this isn't a conspiracy theory. This is just a fact. If the world was peaceful and there was no chaos, we wouldn't feel as tethered to needing guiding principles, people, government, teachers. Like, we seek these things out to give us structure in a chaotic world.

But easily, today, I joke that, like, I keep my head in, like, my head's always in my ass. I don't know anything about anything. I do that intentionally a lot of time, not to, I don't want to know so much. Sure. Like, because it just stresses me out. And then I'll, like, the important stuff, of course. but I don't find it important to get an update every day on a war. I don't find it important to get an update every single day on the worst of the worst.

I'll get an update once a week. Yeah. That's enough for me. Not every day. And so, yes, the world would be, oh, my God, so much better. Because we don't need to know of what's going on in every part of the world when we can't do anything about it. Like, you can't. Like, people can say, oh, no, you can.

can draw attention to it. It's like, but you can't draw attention to everything. And that's when we get these like cause-driven platforms and ideals where it feels like they're singling out a certain cause. And it's like, why'd you do that? And it's because it was popular to single it out. Right.

There are a thousand more than that. There are a million atrocities happening right now in this world. That's a fact. People are talking about one maybe at a time because you can't talk about more than one. Sure. So. And then it becomes fashion. And then it becomes fashion.

Right. Because it's whatever the thing is to talk about. But it's interesting too because I don't know. I always Fran Leibowitz in her documentary, who's queen, talks about how much she loved Muhammad Ali. Yeah. Because she was like, I can give a shit about boxing. But she's like obviously first and foremost, like a movie star, one of the most charismatic figures to ever live. She's like, but also like he went to jail because he didn't want to.

to stand with the Vietnam War. Yeah. That's brave. Totally. Like, you want to stand behind it so much more that you will give away your career and go to jail for this thing that you think is wrong. Like, shout out. Yeah.

Yeah. Jane Fonda, who's been on the right side of things for 50 years. Yeah. Like, queen, respect. Totally. Like, but so much of the posturing and people commenting on thing seems purely performative that you're just like, oh, you, but maybe you did not. Maybe you did less than nothing.

Maybe you made it worse. Look how far your shoulders are going back. Are you lurking on that? I am. I am better. How does it? Talk about your fitness journey and your flexibility. I'm so short right now, right here.

Yeah, so I went back to... This is the saddest thing I ever heard. I know. I went back to the Great Live Method because I can't put Ruby on my shoulders. Since I'm 13 years old, I have ingrained in my brain. I'm in gym class. And Larry Rospoli was his name. Shout out, Larry, if you hear this.

What a great guy. I think he also had a born career. Hey, Larry. Great guy. And let me tell you, he said, Ben, I want to put, I want you to start lifting weights. I'm going to give you a bar. I just want you to lift it over your head. That's a kind thing they say to fat kids because they go, if you're going to be fat, at least be strong.

Yeah. I couldn't get the bar over my head. Since I'm little, I don't have the ability to get my arms far enough back. It'll sit like on my neck, which anybody that does bar work, doesn't sit on your neck. it sits on your shoulders. Then you push up. So I went back to the gym and I was like, Matt, I need you to, right now it's about lengthening my chest or whatever it is. I want to put my sweet son on my shoulders and not be in pain. So yeah, this is, I mean, this is bad. Look at this from the side. I don't know if you can see. This is it. Let me see. I'm going to come. I'm going to do a bit of a,

can I do an on hand's manipulation. You can, but if you hurt me, I'll be upset. All right, so here. Here's the arms, right? And I'm in the bar. My arm. Arms a bar, right? Okay. Grab on. Okay. Oh. Too much?

No, it's okay. I feel like that's all you need, babe. You think so? I feel like you're almost there. But isn't it sitting on my neck? How's that? Oh! It's bad.

It's bad. Ah. We're almost there. I probably need sick. You look great. I don't even, do I have tan lines? Yeah, we're covering at you. You imagine what you're just getting in a year after I'm 40?

One month in New York, my Florida tan's completely gone. Gotta stop tanning, babe. And I know. No, no, not tanning. Just like, I'm living. I know you gotta get rid of it. I can't. I'm on, let me tell you, I wish I mean I got to get rid of it.

I need, by the way, you need to be tan for life is important. No. Olive skin. Yeah, olive skin is hot. It's hot. Get a spray tan boo. I fucked up. At 37, I looked at my, my dumb face and I was like, you ruined it.

But I don't go. I've never been to. a tanning salon. I'll never sit under something. I haven't done that. But I'm like, I play golf. But would you go to the beach for a couple hours and not put on sunblock? Never. Never? Never. No, I'm at the pool. I'm 50 lotion heavy. Every time. Every time. And when you golf? Every time. My dad calls me in the morning. He's like, Ben, if you're not wearing screen, I'm disowning you. Here's me standing corrected. Yeah. No, I'm a big screen guy. Big, big times. Because I never was. Yeah, I understand. You have to be. It's very important.

Babe. You get sunburned. I got a catastrophic sunburn once. Yeah. And since then, I've never not put on 50 plus screen. We were in, I don't know, St. Thomas or something. It was like an hour. We were going to, St. Thomas is like a port where you can go to like these other islands.

And I think we had like an hour layover. And Claudia and I were like, we want to be really tan this weekend. We don't want to show up like marshmallows. So I sat one hour on the St. Thomas beach just trying to get tan for the weekend. blisters. Too close to the equator. Oh my God. Yeah.

Like it was so uncomfortable that I went and I got, I think we got five pints of Greek yogurt and just rubbed it on my body. Is this an... That's what they say. They say Greek yogurt. Yeah. Apparently it's like an aloe. It cools the skin. He stunk.

It was so smelly. A guy named Yorgos walks by and goes, why do I know that smell? Ah, Benny, you have a little sunburn. He just comes with a beat of a chip. Yeah. I love the taste of yogurt skin. So good. So good.

But yeah, that was the last time I did that. God, you poor thing. That was horrible. I don't know. I'm like, you know, I do some skin lasers. Obviously, I've done the upper bluff. What part of your skin do you think isn't perfect? I'm looking at your skin.

It's great. What's wrong? It's okay. You know what? Because you get the spots. You get the little bit of aging spots. Like get a little bit of the malasma. We're aging.

No, we don't have to. We do wrong. We're talent. Okay. That's fair. Listen, I do a little red, I'm just saying it's all about how you feel in here.

How old are you feeling here? Disagree. How old are you feeling here? It's all about how I look out there. How old are you feeling it? I want, what do they say? Don't judge your insides by other people's outside. I want you to judge for my outsides.

Totally. Inside, I'm scum. I hate everyone and everything. Truly, I'm mean. I'm a miserable bastard in here. Oh, my God, it's so true. Sometimes I look at my kids, I go, do better. Smelly?

Yeah. Stop it. You get food everywhere. Ten months old. Have some respect for yourself. Meyer. I turned my back the other day. I was feeding Meyer and I went to go get something.

And I hear him cry. out and I'm like, what's up, bud? And then he, like, kind of just quietes down. But I'm like, you know, 20 feet away from him because I'm in the kitchen and he's at the dining room table. I walked back, he threw up everything all over his body and he's just sitting there going like this. I'm like, now I know why you were upset.

Oh, my God. He just didn't like the food, I guess. Yeah, he was uncomfortable. So cute. I wish we could just throw up on ourselves. Yes. We get like, we go through too much. Like, yeah.

My stomach's dropping. There's no panic. Just shit yourself. So true. There's only a problem because these social constructs we put in place where I can't shit myself. Right. Right. But there would be no panic.

Your stomach drops. What's the runs. I'm shitting right here. Yeah. What a terrible society that would be. This episode of The Good Guys podcast is brought to you by our friends at Hero Bread. Folks, the summer is here. It's grilling season.

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good guys. Find your favorite flavor or share it with a friend. Folks, that is drinkl-M-N-T. dot com slash good guys. Should we get to a story? Yeah, anything to get me to stop talking about the runs. Well, the New York Post said your kids more likely to eat vegetables if you stick to an easy, healthy habit during pregnancy.

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Okay. Because Claudia is not an experimental leader. Everybody knows that about her. We've gotten her now. She'll have a nice piece of cooked salmon. She'll even have a Branzino. But she's like, she sees a beat. She's running for the hills.

Okay. Let me tell you, my sweet Ruby yesterday had a entire cup of borsh. Yeah. He loves borsh. A little sour cream? Loves it. No sour cream yet. He should have, though.

We should have put a little in that. No, this is just a plain beet soup. He's a soup man. He loves a carriage. ginger soup. He love, he, Ruby loves everything and his mama loves nothing. Okay. So true. What I thought they were going to say, which I think is definitely true, is if you want your kid to have a chance of not being a big fat fatty, then you can't eat big fat fatty all the time around them. Right. Because this idea that I'm going to give Ruby a piece of broccoli while I'm having three chow funds,

that's not going to work. Right. And I think that, right? Like, I mean, you're, you're a parent with older kids, Like, is that not it? Like, if I eat healthy, you're going to eat healthy. And then we can collectively eat unhealthy together. Right. But I think that if you're expecting, you can't expect your kids to eat healthy if you're just eating unhealthy in front of them. But it's so delicious. No, that makes sense.

It's in the name. It's not chow miserable. It's chow. It's chow fun. It's so dumb. It's some chow fun. What's better than chow fun? Oh, that big.

Wide noodle. I like a nice big back noodle. What's the biggest fatso noodle? I think it might be chalfun, chalfun. Especially when you're fortunate enough that they got stuck together. Yeah. And all of a sudden you get a mountain of those noodles just stacked on each other. I see someone with high BMI ordering angel hair. I go, stop it. Stop it. I know you want more coverage. You don't want, but you know, an angel hair is not for you. No. It's like eating guitar strings. It's no good. Also, you have to be so good at cooking it. Otherwise, you're ruin it.

That, you know, angel hair cooks in one minute. No. You drop it in, it's cooked. Pull it out. It's crazy. It's crazy. What's the longer, it's more than spaghetti? Um, but it's betuccini, not tagletelli. What's the one that has the little hole in it? Bucatini.

Bucatini. Bucatini. That's a serious fucking noodle. That's, that's devil's hair. Bucatini. Caccio Ipe. Ay, aye, aye. Claudia just did a deal with Yarlsberg.

There's just a wheelie Yarlsberg sitting in my house. Wow. A Yarlsberg spot your ship. Yeah. By big cheese? Big cheese. I guess it was with Devil Worse Prada. Adrian Grinier, your arch nemesis. No, I love him. You never see us in the same room at the same time.

No, you're the same. Ever. Really? You're the same guy. And she got a Yarlesburg deal in there. There's just a wheel of cheese. They just so much cheese in my house. Yarlsberg's a delicious cheese. Sounds fab. The one thing I will say, and I hope it, you're more of a foodie than maybe my wife and I. So I hope it stays this way for young Ruby. My kids were the same way. And then once they got free, will, something changed. Interesting. Like around two, two to three, their taste got much more constrained. But they're still pretty, they like variety.

No, I certainly, I'm sure that's the case. I'm sure. But it's just, it's like a stage. And then they'll go back. Then they want brown foods for, you know, a couple of years. That makes sense. Tenders and fries and shit. That makes sense.

But if you keep pushing, they'll realize what's up. I just like, my parents would send me to school with the craziest shit. Like my dad would just come home. from a wedding with leftovers, and I would literally go to kindergarten with chicken sette and a side of peanut sauce. Ben, why do you have a mason jar of vodka sauce with you?

Sorry, teacher. You want some? Yeah. They always wanted some. Of course. It's like, I don't know, but I'm not going to do that.

It's embarrassing. I'm not going to do that to Ruby. I know. Like, you can't do that to him. You also can't, I love tuna. I can't send you get the tuna to school.

Then they're tuna kid. Right? Yeah. Then they smell like tuna. Unless you're sure. that they're locked in, they have a great group of friends who aren't going to judge them for smelling like tuna. Sure. If they're an outcast and you're sending them with tuna, they're done.

No, you're right. You know? It's no way to live. You can't send smelly foods to kids that maybe haven't made friends yet. No, you have to be really careful. They now are more elevated lunchable, so it'll be like salami and cheese and crackers. Delicious. And a pre-made thing.

And they also have, like, good turkey and cheese and crackers. And you kind of look at it and go like, well, the cheese and the turkey, all right, protein. and some crackers. It's actually not too bad of a lunch. Yeah. But when I send them to school with those things, I go, I'm an incredible dad. Incredible. Because they know that they're stoked. They're stoked and the kids are so jealous. Yeah. The kids around them with their brown bagged PB&J. All I ever wanted was that lunchable. They're like, your name's not Sargento. Yes, it is. Today it is. It was the dream to have the, and I never like, because my parents are sending me gourmet shit. I never got sent that stuff. I know. And that was, I always wanted that,

like a Capri Sun. All I wanted was a Capri Sun in that brown bag. That was it. So yeah, you know, I backtrack a little. Because being a kid, you want those things. And it's really fucking fun. They should be able to have it. It's great. So hard to have it in moderation, but maybe they won't be broken. Who knows? Well, the New York Post said that the craziest divorce demands ever revealed, including how a toaster of an unraveling, a $20 million divorce. A $20 million divorce unraveled over a paltry, $49 toaster oven. In another case, a woman had a tanning bed moved out of her marital home and into her hotel

room mid-divorce. Then there was the man who tried to claim a couch, not for comfort, but because it was there, his wife had caught him cheating with his mistress. So I had a little posterity, the couch, where he picked up with his mistress. Okay, okay. Yeah, he wanted it. Those requests are not outliers. They're quite common.

The most common fights I see are over stupid, inexpensive items. Divorce attorney Paul Talbert told the post. Spouses will get into these knockdown, drag out arguments over old mugs, pots and pans, cheap dining room tables, and couches worth next to nothing. So, God forbid, we one day were not with our wives. What's the one item you need? Nothing. Don't mention our kids.

Nothing. Boring. Nothing. I swear. I don't want, like, the idea of what you just said. is what's wrong with society. Okay. You don't want to be with each other anymore.

Great. I need nothing. I come with what I came with. Sure. I can get a new couch. I can get new furniture. Whoever's keeping the house, which is going to be her,

you keep everything that's in the house. Right. And if I'm starting, like, I honestly, I'd want to start fresh in a God forbid situation. Yeah. I want to be brand new.

I want nothing. That's right. The idea that you would argue over pots and pans just to spend money and ruin somebody's life, I don't care if she cheated on me. I don't, even in that instance, I would want even less to do with her.

Sure. Like, right? Can you comprehend this level of just pettiness? Petiness. Petiness? They said at one point, we are debating the value of a half full bottle of dish soap that was left under the kitchen sink. Like, like, what? What does that even mean?

And was it Kirkland or was it Dawn? Dawn, for sure. Yeah, I'd fight over Don. No, it's great. Yeah, I'd certainly fight over the power. or the spray. You have the dawn spray. Lovely.

And very high end. Very high end. Did you know that neighbors of a SoCal mayor who worked as a secret agent for China reveal her secret double life? Did you see this that the disgraced former mayor

of Arcadia, Eileen Wang, has finally resurfaced in public after resigning in shame over allegations that she acted as a spy for the People's Republic of China? No, and it's true? She stepped down. Yeah, it's true.

Wow. It's allegations. It's alleged. What's going on in Los Angeles? That's pretty epic. Is Spencer Prack going to win? And what country is he working for? The Barbados.

Is he going to win? I know last time we spoke, it's no chance. It seems like, have you seen, he's doing a great job with his ads. They're crazy. They're crazy. They're crazy. But they're attention grabbing and maybe he'll win. I can't tell.

I think he's in second. Yeah, he's in second. And behind Karen Bass, who is still voting? for Karen Bass. My only question is, will he be any good? I have no idea. It's the problem, too, because I think that we are underestimating how much credence people give a well-run campaign.

Sure. And I think people always go, like, well, yeah, like, he's, you know, so-and-so isn't running as good at campaign as the reality star, of course not, but they're better suited. And I go, it doesn't matter. It's like me being like, well, I'll be great in the job, but I'm going to tank the audition. It's like auditioning is part of the job.

To 100%. And it's different than like auditioning for president is different than being president. 100%. You unfortunately have to be great at both. Of course. And so I wonder, he's clearly great at campaigning and running. He's great at campaigning. And I think that he has some very rational ideas that aren't supposed to be.

Polarizing. It should be the norm. Just the line has moved so far that no one knows where it is. And in comes a guy that's like. Yeah, you know, we should, he posted some crazy video of this children's playground. Did you see this video next to an encampment? And like literally on the slide is just, it's just covered in trash, like just garbage and food and needles. And it's disgusting.

Right. And it's just like campaigning on the fact that children's playgrounds shouldn't be next to encampments. That's not like, why is that a polarizing concept? Like, why? I don't know. And it's so funny that we're talking about. I hope, honestly, that this isn't the norm going forward. It happened with Mamdani on the complete opposite side, where all of a sudden what was going on in a Manhattan mayoral race was worldwide news.

Sure. The same exact thing is happening in Los Angeles with Spencer Pratt. I hope to the point of not needing unnecessary information to just make us stressed. Yeah, yeah. Why am I? Who gives a shit? Why do I care? Right.

Why do I care? And so I'm hoping this isn't the trend. But yeah, he's running a great campaign. And if the Momdani effect tells you anything, a well-run campaign gets you the seat. I think it's legitimate. And I think, look, what my buddy always says is that it's really easy to call out issues like that. But like, there's a reason why these things go on 30, 40 years. And it's not just because there wasn't a hard charging person who goes and says, I'm going to fix everything.

Like, there's just a lot of obstacles in the way. There could be. But there are certain types of people. There are people that say, oh, there's an obstacle. I'm going to go around. And there's a person that says, there's an obstacle. I'm going to remove it. Like, that is a, that is 100% of personality trait.

And I think it's also. I'm the first one. I go, there's an obstacle. Let's turn around. I'm judging by the way that I drive, there's an obstacle. I'm driving through it. Right. Like, I just, it's me.

It's me in my life. I don't like a speed bump. Yeah. You know? By the way, speed bumps are terrible. This episode of the Good Guys podcast is brought to you by our friends at the Diamond Crystal Salt Company. Folks, if you're not salting your food, that's a what you're nuts. And I'm telling you, I'm going to your house, and I know you're not using Diamond

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and more Diamond Crystal Kosher Salt. Go get it. This episode of the Good Guys podcast is brought to you by our friends at Grinola. Folks, if you're in back-to-back meetings all day, you know the struggle. You're nodding along, contributing, trying to stay present. But in the back of your mind, you're secretly stressed scrolling your mind. memory for what was just said or who was supposed to follow upon what meetings are a mess granola fixes that granola is an ai-powered notepad built for the way real people actually meet here's how it works

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And it was like Sunday morning at 7 a.m. and I just forgot, just drove my car over it. Like, the middle of my car scraped against the bottom of it. Like, I bottomed out on this curb and I was just like, go go, go, go. Go, go, go. So bad. And, like, it's happening. I'm like, four seconds into it.

And I'm like, well, I just got to keep going now. You do. Yeah. You just got to power through it. I scrap, scraped the fuck out of the middle of my car. What can you do? So bad. Just the bottom.

You don't see that. No, it's fine. Tesla's not going to check. Are you Tesla? Don't check. No, they're not going to check. They're not going to check. Jack.

You need my money, Teth. You need my money, Elon? He doesn't. By the way, Elon Musk, can you come on the podcast? He won't stop talking about it. That's what I'm saying. Can you come on the podcast? You know how many people have sent me the story?

By the way, we can do an entire episode, Elon, just talking about Starlink. For an hour, we'll do a Starlink ad. Yeah. We're the right people. You've shared our clip now four times on Twitter where none of our fans are. Can you post it on Instagram? Put it on Instagram, babe. And it's not just because Mr. Bees in it.

We know it's because you love us, not just Jimmy. Yeah, exactly. And look, it's a great ad. It's our show. Come on. Talk about Starlink. I never know how to respond to because I can't help myself. So every time he does post, I always go, feel free to come on the pod anytime, Elon.

I don't think he sees it. I just think we'd have a nice time. We'd ask him the hard-hitting questions. What do you eat when you're sleeping on the floor of Tesla? We would have a nice time with anyone. I genuinely think that. Who wouldn't we? There's no one we wouldn't have a great. Mom Dani would come on the pod and we would try.

treat him like a king. We would. We'd have a nice time. Because I don't have, I will never be confrontational like that with someone. I would never ever deceivingly bring somebody on the show and then ask them the questions that will make them uncomfortable. Even if it was my worst enemy, they would have a great time on this show. And then I would call you after and I'd say this fucking guy. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's what I would say. I always look forward to that, the wrap up call. But in person, no. Like, we're going to let you be who you. you want to be on the show, do what you want, and hopefully you don't try and take over the show. Hopefully you just come into our universe.

But I don't think that there's a person that would come on this show that wouldn't be great. And we should try it with Putin. Yeah. Oh, my God. We just talk about his dog. Zadrashal. Welcome to the good guys. Wow.

Today we have on Supreme Leader Vladimir Putin. Cook de la. Vladimir Putin. Oh my God. He'd be on that horse, shortless. We would be too. Yeah, what an ad we'd cut. A podcast from the horse.

The three of us on one horse. Live from Lasca. Pass a mic. Yeah. Oh, that'd be good. You have to be a strong horse? Totally. By the way, recently, you know this guy,

clavicular? No. Okay, so clavicular is a streamer who's doing the looks max. scene, right? So he's like this incredibly incredible looking guy who does like all these surgeries and things to look like as young as possible, but he's actually in his early 20s. So clivocular is like pretty widely hated and he's very much, you know, villain energy. But he went on the Logan Paul podcast and him and his wonderful co-host, Mike Majjack, who I think wants to come on the pod.

Great. They asked Clivicular to rate them from one to ten because of course Clivoculars a 10 in his own eyes. And he's a good looking kid. The great Mike, he gave a 3-8-2. The great Logan Paul, he gave a 6-2. This is Big Mike? Yeah, I know how that guy is. And they were pretty mortified.

Yeah, no, that's tough. What do you think, he's coming on our pod, what do you think we're getting? He's giving me. Ones? It's bad. If he's actually looking at every inch of me, pointing out every insecurity,

that's possibly in my brain. He's not measuring the heart, Josh. Right. He's not giving a heart score. He's not giving a humor score. Yeah. It's just raw looks. You're six two.

You're cute as a button. I agree. You know, you've got a little extra weight on you, but you know what? It's part of the package. I agree. Yes, please. You need the package. Yeah.

He's not looking at the package, Josh. No. He's looking straight on one. Yikes. Keep clavicular away from me. I think I'm getting a three unless he asked me to take my shirt off and then I'm going into the negatives. Yeah. Yeah.

Stuff. Negative. That would be rough. Yeah, he's going to say. Negative one. Why does your body look like a topography map? Negative one. Hills and crests and divvits.

Sorry? Do you know this account rate my chives? Have I spoken to you about this guy? No. He is an Instagram account that rates people's chive cutting skills. He's like $100,000 and people just like film videos and themselves cutting chives. Great. And he'll just, like, post it and he'll be, like, one out of 10 worst chive cutting I've ever seen.

Great. And I literally got, like, the balls to do a rate my chives. He gave me a three. It's terrible. Oh, that hurts. It was terrible. But these, you look at it, you're like, oh, my God, that person can't fucking cut chives. And your father, a chef and the owner of a kosher caterer calls you, Benjamin, I was watching my favorite show.

You cut chives? I saw you, Benjamin. You bring shame to our family. You're excommunicated. I disown you, Benjamin. This is no way to cut a chive. Ava! You saw this schmuck cutting chives?

This Benjamin? Sure, he's got a beautiful child, a wonderful wife, and he's very successful business-wise. But his chives care... He got... He brought shame to our family on cutchives.net. I can't wait. Tomorrow night, you are going to meet the great Ava and Bruce. You are.

They're coming. They're very excited. And then you can... get to hear their actual voices and I'm excited for that. I'm going to be star-shock. I'm excited for that. They're very excited. Should we do a moro mail? And then what do you do? Yes. Yes. Good guys, podcast one at gmail.com. Keep writing in. They're fantastic. Oh, can't wait. We just need more of them. More and more and more. Yeah, send more. And rate and review and subscribe. You know what I'm saying? Five stars. It never heard nobody. It never heard.

And if you want to get four stars, you don't have to give anything. But five are, five or busts. And also, if you send it to me once, I saw it, don't change the subject and send it again. Because I almost just read one that I've already read before because it was a different subject. All right, we're going to try this one. Steam room talk, what are you nuts? That's very us, Josh. And it truly is. Good morning, Ben and Josh.

I'll keep a brief. Brevity is key. Thank you. I know Ben isn't a fan of people emailing in a what are you nuts, but going along with the steamroom and gym talk, I felt I need to send this one into you guys to see what you think. I live in Florida and go to a local gym. Recently, our locker room, full service locker room, a sauna, showers, etc.,

has a sign up that tells us to change in the bathroom stalls to make sure everyone is comfortable. What are you nuts? In a locker room gym? A locker room is a place for people to change. There are no changing rooms or anything. They expect us to get ready for work

in a tiny little stall. That sucks. That's weird. That's insane. Right? Are you full? You're completely naked in the gym locker room?

Or are you hiding behind a towel? Here's the lockers, right? Yeah, yeah. I'm just going, I'm going, I'm going to the side, because I'm giving a little peek to my fandom. I'm going, hello. And then, hey, everybody ready? My towel.

No, and I'm going, bring soft, workout shorts on, maybe I'm, like, naked for 20 seconds. I'm more worried about my chest. honestly. I know. You can see my wiener all you want, but I'm like, I'm like doing one of the years.

I'm like, hey, Muhammad, I'll see you at the squat rack. Don't look at my tits. I'm like, I heard so much. I don't know when I crossed that line where I don't care at all. I'll be,

I'm the naked guy. Good. I'm not, I do not support you being the naked guy brushing your teeth or washing your hands or combing your hair. A blow drying,

you're under. You put on a fucking towel when you leave the area that you were changing it. That's right. But around the area, even around the bench, you can walk around naked. Sure. No problem. Yeah. And that's me.

I'm naked these days. You should be. And it's freeing. It's really freeing. I used to take the tiny towel. These towels are too tiny and do my best to get it around, tuck it over the hips. No, I'm nude. Fuck it.

You sure are. Fuck you and fuck it. Yeah. Fuck it. You know? Yes. Should you a toy do you nuts? Or what are you nuts moment of the week?

It's our gripes of people, places and things, both big and tall, whatever, sticking in your craw. Yeah. Bus lanes, Josh. Tell me. Did you see them on your way here? Mm-hmm. Specifically on Madison Avenue. The bus lane is two-thirds of the lanes.

There are three lanes. They've now made it bus lane, bus lane, car lane. What are you nuts? Okay? I'm now, I'm exclusively, I'm driving in the bus lane, exclusively. I haven't gotten a ticket yet.

I'm sure they're all coming in waves. I'm sure one day I'm just going to get a bill for like 40 grand. God. I'm sure that's going to, very scary. And they would be right because I'm in a bus lane. But Josh, we live in a city that doesn't know what it wants to be. If you don't want cars,

we need to do something far more than just putting bike lanes and putting bus lanes and causing congestion and causing traffic and putting up these stupid tolls on 61st Street where you get charged $10 to go over it that's not going to discourage people from driving. It's just going to create more congestion. Literally to go 10 blocks on Madison Avenue,

you're going to be there for 40 minutes. It's one lane. Unless you do what I do, zip around, you're there in 30 seconds. But I think bus lanes are, what are you nuts? I think that we need to be like Chicago and have an upper level and a lower level. Buses can go on the upper level. Let's build up.

I agree. Or how do you take the fucking train? If you're going to take a bus, how about you go underground to the underground bus called the train? Yeah. It's faster. It doesn't cause traffic. More violent. Way more violent.

Yeah. Higher likelihood of stabbing. But lower likelihood of getting in a bus accident. So true. And a train accident is more final. Yeah, that's true. Yeah. Because if you're going to get in an accident, make it stick.

Yeah, no, you're dead. That's true. You're dead. You're dead. And by the way, nobody takes a bus. My dad, Bruce, four times a day. He's always calling me from the bus. And I always have to say, can you fucking keep your voice lower when you're talking about the person next to you and how crazy they are?

Right. I'm so scared that he's going to get stabbed every time he calls me. Yeah. I'm like, please call me when you've left the bus. Benjamin. Should I buy some DVDs? There's a man here, Benjamin. He's got DVDs in a trash bag.

Four for 20. He's got all the new titles, Benjamin. He has a new Michael Jackson film. You've seen this. What happened to bootleg DVDs? I don't know. The bootleg business seems to have gone out. Well, it exists, but it's just like a torrent.

Yeah. I mean, this is a physical bootleg opportunity. Yeah. I never bought him, but boy, did that seem exciting. Oh, yeah, guys got a nice blanket set up in the front of a bodega. Amazing. Yeah, he just has them all laying out there. Movies that don't come out for three years.

Yeah. He got the new avatar. It doesn't come out. So, it's 2029. It's there. Yeah, they have Christopher Nolan's ideas. They have it. It's there. You can buy it. Christopher Nolan hasn't even written this yet. And it's there.

Yeah. And Richie on the corners got it. It's legit for sure. For sure. For sure. It's yours. My Woody Nuts moment is myself, as per usual. Just because you think of something, doesn't mean you have to say it. We were on the flight here to Great New York, and there was this adorable flight attendant for the Great United. Shout out my girl, Maggie, over at United.

But I paid full freight. I just like Maggie. And this guy, it's just adorable. He's talking to all the different people on the flight, and he's checking everyone in, flight attendant. And he had an accent, and my wife turns to me and goes, oh, he reminds me of our friend Constantine. I go, he's exactly like Constantine.

I wonder if he's Greek. Well, as I'm walking down the aisle towards the end of the flight, he goes, have a great flight, nice seeing you, you know, enjoy New York. I go, thank you. You, where are you from? And he goes, I'm Croatian. I go, oh, because you reminded us of our friend from Greece.

You're the worst. What are you nuts, Josh? He looked at me like, okay. Yeah, exactly. Thanks. Like, he's like, they're close. I'm like, sorry. That's the equivalent, which is also the worst.

your birthday, April 3rd. Oh, mine's April 23rd. Who cares? So? Yeah. What do we do now? Save it. You know what we do now, Josh?

We rate this episode five stars. That's what we do. We rate it five stars. Otherwise, what are you nuts? Listen to us wherever you get your podcasts. Watch us on Spotify. Watch us on YouTube. Share our clips.

Instagram and TikTok. I'm going back to the beginning. Do it all. Mondays and Thursdays, folks, we'll see you. Next time. Spotify, it's Jay Shetty. Are you one of those media strategy people? Scrolling through spreadsheets, searching for an audience that pays twice as much attention to your ads than they do on social?

Let me introduce you to fans. And they're here with me on Spotify. Trust me, I know fans. They don't skip. They stay for hours. They don't move on. They manifest. They're not a demographic group.

They're fans. Spotify advertising. You're among fans. Thanks.