Good Guys - Not for the Barstool Crowd

Episode Date: September 12, 2022

This week on The Good Guys, Josh and Ben dive in to some hard-hitting topics: Lea Michelle and Funny Girl, the immune system of children, and may even touch on some sports news!  Hosted by Josh Peck and Ben Soffer. New episodes are dropping every Monday. Don't miss it - what are ya, nuts? See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

I'm Josh Peck. And I'm Ben Soffer. And we're the good guys. There's a lot of guys out there. And we're the good ones. And I promise one day we're going to get that intro nailed down. It's harder than it looks. It's just too hard.

It's too hard. Maybe we try it again. Let's try it again together. All right. I wish everyone could see your Jewish mother hand signals. You're giving me through the Zoom. It's two hands, two hands, and go, and go. Okay.

I'm Josh Beck. And I'm Ben Saffer, and we're the good guys. There are a lot of guys out there. And we're the good ones. I think we nailed it. I think we nailed it. I don't think we should overthink. No, that's what I think.

I agree. I agree. Speaking of nailing it, Wednesday night, Claudia, myself, Brian Kelly, Margot, we went to see Funny Girl. It was Liam Michelle's second show. And my God, you talk about nailing it. This woman, born for the role. I understand it was at one point made for Barbara Streisand, but Barbara Streisand, move over.

Liam Michelle is on Broadway, and she is truly fantastic. Bite your tongue. First of all, we have lost any hope of getting any of the bar stool listeners or any... Now that we're about to have a heated funny girl debate. But, you know, first of all, before I interject and before I debate you, say more about the funny girl experience because it's a hot ticket. She was just incredible.

And you realize when you're there that this role, yes, it was made for Barbara, but really, there aren't many women out there that can do it. Honestly, I'm not trying to build up Claudia. I think Claudia could play this as well. She'd be fantastic. I do too. She'd be fantastic in it. A revelation. You need to have unbelievable vocal cords.

You need to be funny. need to have enough Yiddishia in you to really bring out the Judaism in the role because it's actually a very, it's borderline religious the show. But Liam Michelle's no Jew. No, but she played a really, are you positive she's not a Jew by the way? I think we can look it up, can't we? I mean, we're a big podcast. Yeah, she feels to me like somebody that changed their name when they entered Hollywood.

But I feel like she's Jewish. If not, I take back everything I said in the show is incredibly anti-Semitic. Because she is in there really just like. with the chas and the she's very very Jewish in the it's she must be Jewish is she Jewish her mother is an Italian American okay with ancestors from Roman Naples okay her father a Sephardic Jew with ancestors from Greece okay good here we go but was raised in her mother's Catholic faith which good let's be honest Catholicism and Judaism we're bonded by food and guilt it's not that

different no it's not that different no it's not that different It's not that different. That being said, she's got enough Judaism in her, that it's not anti-Semitic. The role was fantastic. It's very, very difficult. It was a packed house. Man, I felt like it was the 1970s. You're going to the theater.

Everybody's excited. Because nowadays, you go to a show, it's boring. Everybody, like, theater's routine, right? This was hardly routine. This was a big production, and it was fantastic. What was the energy like walking into that place? Like, and when was the first sort of, when you have a woman or any performer coming out playing a role to your point like that that requires so much of them, the audience decides early whether they're on their side. And if they are, they go fucking nuts.

So when was like the first pop of the audience going crazy? Immediately. And Leah Michelle held for ovations the entire time. Like she would basically stop the crowd and encourage everybody to clap and stand. She forced some of her standing ovations, but from the second that she got out there, it was like, I'm here, clap for me, go crazy, and everybody really responded. And do we know, I mean, I feel like your wonderful wife would be at the center of this hot goss, but do we know what happened with the original person playing this role, Beanie Feldstein, aka Jonah Hill's sister, who sort of walked away at a. nowhere right yeah I mean I just don't think that the role was right for her again you said we've alienated the bar stool listeners we have we're going deep into

theater and then after this we're gonna talk about Brian Kelly's gay baby shower so now please we are who we are and that's that now please for the listeners what's your newest cuggle recipe I use a pinch of cinnamon and seven raisins Wait, so speaking of standing ovations, and I don't mean to hop right into our first story, but it feels apropos, and you set me right up as you do. Now, recently we've had the Venice Film Festival going on, and it seems as though, and I didn't really know this, that a part of the Venice Film Festival, Cannes Film Festival, you know, these French, these Italians,

they like a standing ovation we're finding. And I saw Brendan Fraser get a eight-minute standing ovation for his performance in The Whale, which looks like an incredible movie and an incredible performance. And I thought that until I saw all the other standing ovations happening. And now I'm thinking maybe it's not so special. Let me give you a rundown, okay? Anna de Armas cries as blonde receives 14 minutes. standing ovation. Receive. Receivis.

Receivus. It's bland, receive this seven minute ovation. Anna di Armas. I mean, I don't know if I'm going to get cancer for being like, I watched the trailer, she looks great in it. I didn't know Marilyn Monroe had an accent, but, you know, whatever, we accept. Colin Farrell lands rapturous, 13-minute standing ovation for the banshees of In Sharon, I don't know, and Bones and

all premiere gets a 10-minute standing ovation at the Venice Film Festival. Like, what are you, what's with all the standing? What's with all the obations? What do you, what do you do for a 10-minute standing ovation? Doesn't your, feel uncomfortable? Doesn't your hand hurt? And who tells you when it's done? Is it like an orchestra and they do like the, the hand close and drag it across when it's finished? You know, what I heard of some people, like with Brendan Fraser, he tried to leave. He tried to leave and they wouldn't allow it. They were like, let us ovate you more. So it's so interesting that you brought that up because what I had heard was that

Brendan Frazier was sort of on the outs of Hollywood. He was forced out. People blackballed him. Couldn't get back in. Does this movie. Ovation, eight minutes. That's the big story. Brendan Frazier's back.

Based on what you're telling me, he actually had the shortest ovation of all of the ovations. So really, is he back? I don't think so. I think the media, again, twisted this story just a little bit. Who was the 13-minute ovation? I think Brendan Fraser should be ashamed. Yes.

No, Colin Farrell. Colin Farrell. Now, that's a star. I'm just saying, 13 minutes. Great actor. 13 minutes. That's good stuff. But you're so right.

I mean, Brendan Fraser, for the last 10 years, I mean, people were ruthless about this guy. They said he looked like he got pulled out of a river. Shout out Janus Poppus, that's Janus's joke. But they were so awful and like to undeservedly so. I mean, Brandon Frasier has always been a great actor. And from what I hear, the loveliest guy. And it just goes to show how flippant Hollywood is, right? Because now he's going to win the Academy Award and he's literally back.

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. I'm trying to remember what I liked Brendan Frazier. What was he in very recently? He was kind of a bad guy, wasn't he? I don't watch enough. Yeah, I don't watch enough either. He's a great actor, though. I'm happy that he's seemingly back, well-deserved, strong ovation.

Now, tell me this, too. Is there, I'm best, and I'm not passing judgment, because I really don't know Liam Michelle well, but I think there was a bit of a reckoning for her for the last couple of years, right? Like people had felt like maybe she hadn't been the coolest in moments. And now this feels like very much this like new second act. So is it just enough time passed or is it just she's so talented it's outweighing anyone's sort of bad feelings?

I think it's that she's so talented that it's outweighing people's bad feelings because people love to rip on Liam Michelle. It's so funny. Claudia is the queen of loving Liam Michelle but making fun of her. And just across the board, like I'm sure you. You know, the TikTok kids say that she can't read. That's like a big thing. That's a big thing. That's a big thing.

She listened to all a funny girl on audio tapes because she can't read. And you know we don't like female readers. No, we don't support female literacy on this show. So that's why we love Leah Michelle because she's illiterate. I'm praying that no one knew it's coming into the podcast and just hearing that out of context. Totally. Oh, man. No, but for the new listeners, we don't support literate women.

So if you are illiterate women, I would recommend that you don't listen. No, we love literacy, and I believe that Leah Michelle is literate. But even if she isn't, fantastic, fantastic talent, and I think that this role was built for her because of what she did on glee, and it just needed to happen. It needed to happen. Why are you forcing Beanie Feldstein into a role that's too big for her? Leah and Michelle perfected,

don't tell me not to live, just sit in putta, on glee. Yeah, don't rain on my parade. Don't rain on my parade. She sang it like a pro. I don't even know if I said the right words, by the way. Don't tell me not the... Something about butter.

In putter. Life's candy. Something a ball of butter. She's fantastic. Can we just talk about how much we bench now? Because if this doesn't get at least slightly more masculine, I don't know. I think we're going to spontaneously combust.

We're going to get to the masculine stuff. We're going to get there. The next topic is Brian Kelly's gay baby shower. We're going to get there. where it was filled with drag queens and unbelievable chocolate covered Oreos. So let's, for anyone who doesn't know, because I know it's, it's so many toasters who are familiar with the great Brian Kelly, but Brian Kelly is a genius travel blogger. He's the points guy. He started really a travel empire. And one of one of the loveliest people there is, correct?

Loveliest. Dear friend of both of ours. Dear friend. And he has recently announced that he has a surrogate and who's giving birth, what, in October? Yep. My baby's going to be friends with his baby. Yep, yep. This is possible. It's totally possible.

So he had a big gay baby shower, take it away, Ben. Give us a play-by-play. We walked in. It was at Margaret Joseph's, who's a real housewife's house. Housewives everywhere. Me and a bunch of drag queens. and literally like these performances, I don't know if you've seen any drag shows,

these performances that these women put on or men put on are just insane. Insane. And it was wonderful, and it was joyous, and it was just a lovely, lovely time, filled with tons of spritz. There was lots of spritz there too,

everywhere. Sprit society was flying. And it was just a great time, had by all, and I'm so happy for Brian. We should get Brian. on this podcast. He'll be a guest. I would love it. Yeah, we'll bring him on.

Spritz, the great canned alcohol beverage from the Great Ben Sofer, truly the only beverage that makes me want to give up my 14 years of sobriety. Yeah, it's worth it, by the way. Honestly, I should start pitching AA houses. I should just go in, let them know, you know,

there's a good deal here. That's so evil. Maybe you want a little. It's evil. It's funny. Because it is. like in so many of my friends in sobriety we'll talk about well-meaning relatives who tend to be of the Jewish persuasion how after a couple of years after the trials are over after the breath elizers have been removed from the cars you know

everything comes down and they'll look at you at a holiday dinner and they go can't you just have a little stop it already can't you just have a sip and I want to say grandma I can but then in a couple of hours, I'm going to be under the table, crying, and asking if you think my dead relatives are proud of me. So I think it's for the best, and I don't have just like a sip of the Passover wine. I get it. I do. And grape juice, by the way, is delicious. You're really not missing much. I love a good grape juice. Do you prefer Kedem or Welsh's? You know what? I'm an equal opportunity grape juice drinker. But,

You are. And I'm not just saying this. I love a sprits. I love a mocktail. I love a club soda. I'm going 80% sparkling water. And I'm going 20% a juice of my choosing. Lemonade, a grape juice, perhaps.

Cranberry, if I'm feeling bloated. And let me tell you, it's just so, and it is so, I prefer it to 100% of the juice. A, because it's healthier. But B, it's just the right balance. Is cranberry an anti-blote? a is that a thing I know it's for urinary tract infections very good have you ever not a man with the urinary tract infection I know that we can get them I don't

know many men with UTIs I don't I'm sure that they can happen but I I don't I don't and it's actually interesting that I wonder why that is I wonder why that is I guess it's hard yeah I know I don't know. We should bring a doctor on the podcast too. We should bring on a doctor to ask these questions. Listen, my dream is to be a friend with more doctors because I want easy access to medical advice at every turn.

Last night, my son threw up and I can't tell you, he had a fever and we had given him some medicine and then he threw up within a minute after. And you don't know do I give him the medicine again? He almost certainly threw it up, but every parent's great fear. is to overdose your kid on like Advil or Tylenol and have to run them to the ER. So I text our doctor, his pediatrician. This doctor, I'm not going to name her

because I don't want her getting too busy, but she texted me back within a minute. She said, give him Tylenol instead of the Advil. It's fine, different medicines will lower his fever. It was a great night. What is it with kids and always being sick? Kids just always, they have a cold, They give the cold to the parents.

The parents give it to everybody they know. Every parent I know is always sick. I'm actually surprised that you don't have more of a cough frequently, at least when I speak to you, because every parent I know is sick from their kid getting sick. And then these kids always have fevers. Is it because they have a low immune system? Is that what it is?

The kids are always sick? It's because they have no immune system. Kids immune systems are like new credit, right? You got to get a small credit card with a $200, dollar nothing limit you should be ashamed of yourself and you pay it off every month on the day so yeah you basically you're establishing credit you're establishing an immune system and that's why they spike crazy fevers that's why they're always having ear infections or whatever because their body is reacting to every new pathogen on earth wow what an analogy what an analogy credit to the just

health of a young buck. The opposite of a young buck is, and I wanted to talk about this, I don't know your opinions on her, but rest in peace, the queen, the queen, the passing of her majesty, who must have had an unbelievable immune system given her time on this great planet. Were you a, are you a fan of the royals? Did you keep up with the royals at all? Was that something that you liked? And then Prince Charles, did you ever watch The Prince by Gary Genetti? Have you seen that show? No, I haven't. Oh, it's fantastic.

It's basically a family guy except the Royals, and he just makes fun of them, and he sketches them in their cartoons. It's amazing. But thoughts on, are you a Royals person or not really? I think the idea of royals and monarchy is ridiculous in royal bloodlines, much like the Jews. A lot of incest going on there, let's be honest. But I had a huge amount of respect for this Queen Elizabeth. I mean, she just seemed like the ultimate leader, no? I'm pretty sure that they're just the wealthiest family of all time.

That's why they remain royals. I'm fairly certain that they are just loaded, respected. And yeah, the queen seems like she was a fantastic, fantastic woman. Fantastic. I mean, this is someone who, she was 96 years old, right? So she was, I mean, so that means she was like in her 20s or her late 20s during World War II. So she's, you know, in the trenches in theory with Winston Churchill. Like, I mean, the most major events of the last 70 years she's been privy to.

It's pretty unbelievable. It is unbelievable. It's unbelievable. At Brian's Baby Shower, I'm currently blanking on her name, but she's a Nobel Peace Prize winner. I have to remember her name. Big in Africa, Brian donates to this village, and she gave this speech today about how her grandmother recently passed away at 115. Wow.

Is that unbelievable or what? 115 years old. She died recently. She was born in 19, what, 05? Crazy. Do you want to live that long? I think that I want to figure out the secret to living that long, because I think that if you live that long, this is a hunch,

you have very little stress in your life and you found a way to not be so stressed about the little things in life. I think stress is the number one killer of people in general. I think people die early. They can say heart attacks, they can take cancer, all this stuff.

I think it's all caused by stress. And every single time I hear of somebody living to 115 years old, they happen to not live in the United States. And I think that they found a way to be less stress because their environment around them is just more peaceful.

So do I want to live to 115? I would be very happy at 92. That being said, if it led me to a stress-free life, I'm open to anything. Let me tell you, if I live to 115 years old, I'm going to be like Brian Cox in succession. Like my family is going to be so adamant about me dying. You're going to say, when is this bastard going to kick the bucket already? Because I'm going to become, I mean, I'm already at 35 years old. I'm getting to a point where I'm really not caring about what other people think of me.

The Internet, strangers I care deeply about. My immediate family, nothing. So I just think I will, I mean, in my 70s, I imagine I'll be insufferable. Or not, because I really love soup. I don't love stairs. I love a cardigan. And have you ever seen the comedians in cars shrieking coffee with Seinfeld, Carl Reiner, and Mel Brooks?

I don't think I've seen that one, no. But I do love comedians and cards getting coffee. I find it fascinating. It's the best. And I watch this episode to make me happy sometimes because Carl Reiner, comedy legend, creator of the Dick Van Dyke Show and a million other things,

Rob Reiner's father, and Mel Brooks, you know, producers, and the young Frankenstein. And basically, they're both guys who were widowers and they were in their 80s and they had grown up together. And Jerry's interviewing Carl Reiner and Carl says, you know, every night Mel and I, we have dinner and we watch a movie. First we watch Jeopardy and then we watch a movie and the movie has to have a line like, I'm going to secure the perimeter.

It's got to be something that we're not going to think a lot about. Would you like to come have dinner with us? And Seinfeld's like, I'd like nothing more. So they sit, they have this nice woman who's like serving them. I'm sure she's getting paid well. They're eating deli. They're watching movies. It seems like the greatest time ever.

Nothing like deli in movies. We should eat more deli. We've never had deli together. We always go for like a fancy meal. It's never just like a low-key deli. I think we could use some deli. Well, I don't want to blow up your spot, but you have access to one of the hottest restaurants in New York

that you can literally get a same-day reservation. I can. If you want to reveal the place, You know, I'll let you do it because I'm not. Yeah, see, it's a push pull. I want to promote it for my dear friend who owns it, but I also don't want people hitting me up asking me for reservations. Don't do it.

I think I'm not going to do it. And it's so funny, people are going to be so pissed when they hear this. They're going to say, why didn't you do it? Because for the last literally 10 years since I made an Instagram account, maybe eight years, I post pictures of my food always. I patented, as you know, a gorgeous key to season, and I pan over a beautiful plate of pasta, maybe a salad, a wedge, a barata.

I'll never tell anybody where I am. And people hate it. They're like, what restaurant are you at? I'm here to make cinema, what is it? Cinemographic? I'm here to make a gorgeous... Pornographic? I'm here to make a beautiful video of my food

that is borderline pornographic, put a little wonderful music to it, but I'm not trying to get you to go to my restaurant so that I can no longer get a seat, right? That's right. No, I'm showing you the beautiful food that I'm eating for me. It's my restaurant, my food. That's it.

So, no, I'm not telling anybody about the name of this restaurant because otherwise it's already hard for most people to get a reservation. Fine, it's carbon. Carbone. It's carbon, and don't worry, you're not getting a reservation. You don't even try. It's hard anyways, but Mario,

Carbone has made just an unbelievable group of restaurants with the guys at Major Food Group. He also happens to be just the tits, the sweetest, fantastic, great, great man with a great taste for Italy. I wish I was friends with them. I'll introduce you. I'll introduce you. I'll trade you Mario Carbone for John Stamos.

You want to do that? Oh, my God. Stamos would love you. Let's go to dinner the four of us. Me, use Stamos and Carbon at Carbone. Listen, that sounds like a dream. And you know why you're great, Ben, amongst other things? I like a friend who I can, you know, have a real yent-a-session with, such as we're having now at dinner, have a great time, someone who's well-connected, but someone who I can feel comfortable eating like a total pig with.

Oh, yeah. Like, and when I, when we go out, we take off the restraints. We say this is going to be a celebration and it's going to be a couple courses and we're not going to leave here feeling good. You come to dinner with me. You wear something elastic. You don't wear anything buttons. You wear a stretchy t-shirt in case you need to push it out a little. I know as a former fat man, I'm a current fat man.

You understand what breaking the seams is like in a t-shirt where you need to rip it open to get a little bit more room. You wear an elastic pants. That's why I love this whole new culture where you don't need to wear a button down and jeans to be fancy anymore. Now you just need to buy a $500 t-shirt. And you can wear a $500 t-shirt, and you're still in t-shirt and sweatpants. But that's considered the new fashion, right?

And that's perfect, perfectly conducive for overeating. You go to a nice meal. I like, you know, and you know what else I like about you, Ben, when we go out and said, I, you came to L.A. once. We went to Baltair, which is a lovely steak restaurant in Brentwood. And I've been around L.A. people too long. So I go, and I'm on my, like, you know, male actor diet.

And I'm like, I'll order a salad and a protein. And you go, should we maybe start with a few things? I go, yeah, let's do it. You ordered three to four appetizers and then a salad and then a steak. I said, this is how to dine. Because I always want to order. I always want the spinach art of choke dip and the onion rings. Do I get it?

No, but when I'm in bed and suffer, it's happening. I'm just saying, if you want like a lean meal, go to just salad and get a salad, right? Like if you're going to a restaurant, soak it in. Order a little extra. So you don't finish it all. Have a bite. Have two bites.

Order a little extra. Order a little extra. It's not going to kill you. And if it is going to kill you, you shouldn't be going out to eat at all. And you should be cooking at home. Save your money. You know, it's funny. I have recently been using your argument against Starbucks tip jars.

that we should start paying livable wages to these people, and it's not incumbent on us to do it. And you know what? I've been getting a lot of weird books. I'm just saying it's not on us. I'll die on this hill. It doesn't make any sense. And, yeah, I just, I don't need to tip $5 on a $5 coffee.

And you can't leave one. One is just, it's too little. So, yeah, no. I'm sorry that I'd put you in that position, but I'm going to die on that hill. So how do you feel knowing now that, you know, you're in New York, so you get the four seasons, and we're in the dog days of summer. It's almost done. You know, there's going to be two weeks of gorgeous, you know, Woody Allen movie Fall in New York, and then it's just going to get disgusting and just brick.

How are you feeling? Do you get any seasonal depression? I love fall. I love fall. It's four days. Fall is four days. I also like early winter. I like, I'm comfortable into the high 40s, low 50s, so I'm good through Thanksgiving. I like it so much more than summer. It's not even close.

Summer is meant, if you live in New York, summer is meant for you to leave New York. And I'm sorry, I'm not at a place yet where I can just leave New York, right? Like sure, you take a weekend here, but people, if they live in New York and they're rich enough, they go to the Hamptons, or they go to New Jersey, go somewhere for the entire summer because the summer in the city is completely unbearable. That's why I don't know if you were a kid that went to camp. My parents shipped me off to camp. It was amazing because it's too fucking hot in the city. So fall, I think fall is, it's tied with spring for my favorite season.

Spring is the opposite. Spring starts off gorgeous and all of a sudden you can't breathe it so hot. I'd prefer to be smacked in the face, put on a nice puffer, maybe make a snowball. I like winter in the city too. What about you? I like, you know, I don't mind when it gets a little bit chilly. I'm certainly over the heat that we're dealing with now, especially in L.A.

It's been 90, 100 degrees. It's getting ridiculous. But I like, you know, I love the city in spurts. But if I was in New York, I'd probably want to be upstate, like, actually, you know, driving somewhere with the apple cider donuts, you know, going to an orchard, perhaps, seeing some real foliage. I thought you were going to say orgy. I was like, you go up, I don't know where you're going upstate to find an orgy.

You know what the worst thing to hear it, an orgy is? What? My bad. That's funny. You know, not that I contemplate these things, but do you, if you're, and I don't, I can't speak for Claudia, of course, but if our wives gave us Carblanche, a hall pass, as they say, and said, yeah, you can go have some group sex. Do you think you could do it?

I think that group sex feels like something that's a little bit too much for me. Yeah. Group sex feels... It's like a sizzler for intimacy. It's a good idea, but in practice. No, yeah, it sounds fantastic. It's something I'm sure I'm going to go to sleep. I'm going to dream about it.

I'm going to wake up, you know? But no, I think in practice, I personally couldn't do it. I couldn't do it. You? No, I certainly couldn't do it. I don't even know if I was single if that really poses any interest to me. I think if she said

you can go, I don't know, hook up with our son's pediatrician who I love. No, I'm kidding. If there was like some, you know, starlit that I was working with or something where she was like, you know what, go have fun, I'm secure enough in our thing.

I think what would kill me would be the idea of the reciprocity, right? Like the idea that she could then, she would be completely entitled to go do her thing with some, I don't know, you know, gorgeous Mark Sanchez look alike because that's someone she mentioned she had a crush on 10 years ago and I can't stop thinking about it. See, that's what's tough. It's tough to hear that your wife has a crush on somebody that looks nothing like you.

Because then you're like, why are you with me? What exactly is going on? that Claudia loves Harry Styles. I couldn't be further from Harry Styles, right? She has told me from time to time, I think only when she's drunk that I look like John Mayer, who she also loves. I just don't look like, I don't think so. You know what, you do, and you're both big men.

Do you know that about John Mayer? Is he a big man? A giant man. Really? How big? Big man, like your height, and a gigantic head, which you don't have. I don't. And huge hands.

What's your baseball? cap size? My head's big. It's not too big. I'm a seven and five-eighths. Oh, I'm seven and three-quarters. That's the same thing. You have a bigger head than I thought. Five-eighths. That's a big head. Yeah, I mean, and when I grow my hair out, it's, it's, you know, game over. I like that you knew the answer to that, though, because that does bring us back into the mail zone a bit. Women don't know the size of their heads for fitted caps. Do you, ladies? No, they only know it for like a fun, you know, boat fedora. Yeah, exactly. No, But that comes in small, medium, large, extra large. That doesn't come in seven and an eighth.

Which, by the way, anybody with a head seven and eighth and below, too small. I don't trust you. That sounds like one of those, like, real New York, like, memes. Like, find you a girl who knows her hat size. Literally, you should pitch you to New York Nico in that group of just... I'm fascinated by that group. Do you follow New York Miko? I do.

Actually, I recently, in my... Netflix movie 13 The Musical, my character, who's a rabbi, is wearing a baseball cap, and I knew New York Nico had just put out this cool kind of merch, and I asked him to send me a hat, and I wore it in the movie.

Oh, wow. He must have been very thrilled with that. That's great product placement for him. But him and his just group of guys in the city, they're fantastic. They're the most New York kids I've ever seen, like almost to New York.

Almost to New York. The most New York is, I know a favorite of both of ours, a new guy on the scene, Cougain. I think Cougain is just the cats we have. He's hysterical. And he is the epitome. He's not really New York. He's like Staten Island, like hardcore Italian, but Cujin is fantastic. So I think we, you know, we got excited and we forgot about our Woody and Nuts moment of the week.

Do you have one? We did. We did. Oh, what do I have? Oh, you caught me off guard. Do you have one quickly? Oh, I, okay. So I have a slight what are you nuts moment, and I don't know how it's going to make me sound, but I'm also going to, you know, take a leap of faith here with our listeners. But, you know, I happen to be on a fairly popular kids television show called Drake and Josh. Not sure if you heard. I've heard. I have heard of it. I have. Recently, I was at a McDonald's because, as I mentioned, my son wasn't feeling good, and the one thing he wants me. and feel good is a happy meal. And I'm just not going to be that parent

that says no to my kid when he don't feel good for some ultra-processed fast food. So I go in there and this girl working there, the guy ringing me up lovely, this girl working there, she goes, you from a TV show? I go, yeah, yeah, I am. And she goes, Drake and Josh?

I go, yeah, that's me. And she goes, I knew it, I knew it. she proceeds to now go to everyone behind the counter the fried girl the drive-thru guy the girl working in the back with like the bum leg sweeping okay she's announcing to everyone it's him he's here can you believe it he's here he's getting a happy meal no problem happy to be there then she just starts screaming out the things that are like the least common denominator where's drake say this line I go, I'm being berated. I'm just waiting for my six sons happy meal. Can we not expedite the process? So then she comes up to me, she looks at me, she goes, are you uncomfortable? I say, I've been more comfortable.

She goes, because you look annoyed. I'm not annoyed. I just, you know, I'm just trying to get my son some dinner. And one of the guys goes up and goes, yo, can you leave this guy alone right now? And I wanted to say to the guy, God bless you. Thank you, because I can't say that.

And she was lovely. I would have taken a pick, whatever she wanted to do. But like, in that situation, there's just no weight away. Did she give you a free happy meal? No, what are you nuts? Nothing. And they forgot his, wait,

they forgot something that was important. I want to say apple slices. Oh, does he dump? At that young of an age, does he dunk his chicken nuggets yet? Has he been exposed to sauce? Or he's not a sauce guy yet? No, he's a sauce king. Does he enjoy a sweet and sour or a barbecue?

What is his McDonald's sauce of choice? He's pretty standard. He likes ketchup on his fries and barbecue for his nugs. That's good. He's a classic. They have great sauces at McDonald's. I always thought they should bottle them and sell them in grocery stores. Doesn't that seem like a layup?

Easy revenue? I think I did a social media. campaign for them years ago when they actually took their Big Mac sauce and put it out there. And I don't know. The only reason I could think that they don't is either A, it's not shelf stable, but that can't be the case. Or B, they're worried about people. Knowing what's in it. Yeah, breaking down the recipe.

Or they're worried that people are going to find out how unbelievably unhealthy their sauces are. But what secret sauce? You know, it's mayo, it's ketchup. it's relish and some seasoning. Yeah. I don't know what's in that sweet and sour though. I can't tell you. I know there's probably vinegar.

There's probably sugar. I don't know what else is in it. I'm dying to know. Oh, that sweet and sour is my personal favorite. You know, I know we were talking about Canada last step. And I know you had mentioned that you were like kind of on the fence about Canada. And I had some thoughts about it. I actually think Canada is what America would be if America went to,

therapy, actually, having spent so much time. But their McDonald's is, dare I say better, but their sauces are so, because they have European food standards, so there's no high fructose corn syrup in the sauces. I got to say, I don't want my barbecue sauce to taste like a tomato. I want it to taste like nuclear, you know, gel or whatever the stuff is we have in the States, right? It's so funny. It's weird because we did talk about Canada and I didn't bring this up last time. We went for a friend's wedding in Montreal probably six months ago. I'm incredibly drunk, three in the morning, go to McDonald's.

We're all outside of McDonald's. They won't let anybody into McDonald's, right? Because they still have COVID. In 50 years, COVID will still be a thing in Canada. They still have COVID. Everybody's outside wearing masks and you can't come into the McDonald's. You have to order on an app and then go in and retrieve your food. But because I'm from the United States, I don't have the McDonald's. of Canada app. So I said to them, please, I'm American. Let me come in. For whatever reason,

they let me into the store. I go into the store, and because I'm the only person in the store, I proceeded to order $200 of McDonald's. So much McDonald's, and I'll never forget it. The McPuyet, fantastic. It was just an unbelievable chicken sandwich.

Fantastic. I remember I ordered 120 nuggets. No. Yeah, it was for a group, probably 10 people. I ordered 120 nuggets. So the Canadian McDonald's, I'm 100% with you. Fantastic. I don't remember their sauces, but the more processed, the better when it comes to most sauces. Sauce is one of those things that needs to be processed. So do you have a what are you nuts moment? Because the people, they love it from you, Ben. I do. They always come

down to similar themes, right? I typically complain about travel, and I have a travel story from two days ago. A travel, what are you nuts? So I went to Lake Tahoe 24 hours, a quick business trip, was taking a red eye back, and I didn't realize, but Lake Tahoe is, I guess, a popular place for people to go after Burning Man. I've never been to Burning Man, but you've probably heard of burners and these people, they go and they all smell and they're wearing their, like, I don't you know how to describe it. It's like a, it's classic Burning Man. You know what it looks like. Burning Man is a 10-day festival in the middle of the Nevada desert. And it's like, you know, it's basically...

Ayahuasca. It's an ayahuasca trip. Is it not? Yeah, it's a, it's basically go for 10 days and do everything that would be taboo in the real world. Correct. Correct. So they called themselves burners and there were probably 25 people from Burning Man. they were on my flight going from Lake Tahoe to New York. And there's this one guy there that I looked at my business partner that I was traveling with

and I thought to myself, you know, that guy looks, he looks homeless. He's wearing a sleeveless shirt. His beard is dyed pink. He's wearing very, very short shorts that looks like he isn't showered in 10 days. I'm thinking to myself, this guy looks homeless. All of a sudden,

somebody that works in the airport, walks up to the guy and says, sir, you smell terrible. I'm going to need you to put on deodorant. What do you, nuts? Can you imagine walking up to a guy in the airport and asking him to put on deodorant? She then proceeded to walk to the Hudson News, pick up deodorant, give it to him,

and he applied deodorant before the flight in the airport, probably three feet away from me. So that's my wedding, you know, nuts. I just can't believe that I'm assuming you flew Delta There's only one Direct flight From Lake Tahoe to New York And that is operated by JetBlue

Not JetBlue Mint Regular JetBlue Red Eye Terrible Well I think that it bodes well for the JetBlue team That if you smell bad enough You're going to get a free deodorant out of your one-way ticket It was It was really great

work by the staff in the airport I will say that I also I'm not a I'm not a stoner if you will I dabble and maybe I'll smoke some weed once every two months it's a rare rare thing for me but they have dispensaries are legal there and somebody told me go to the dispensary get some gummies you'll sleep like a baby I slept like a baby I never ever ever sleep on planes wow and I slept like a baby I was out you were Some might say the reason you did not recall this one of your nuts moment so quickly was because you were totally obliterated on marijuana It's possible. It's possible that the Marijuana got to my brain

It's like those old school ads that it's the marijuana that's killing your brain cells It could be Do you worry as not a regular I feel like such a dad marijuana user? The devil the devil the lettuce that when you do partake, especially in an edible, because it's not easy to get the dosage correct, that you're going to do too much and become paranoid

and look for the exit on the plane at 35,000 feet? I just go with what I've heard, which is that you can't overdose on marijuana. Whether that's true or not, I say to myself, Ben, you took a very appropriate dose. There are 10 milligrams. I ate a half of it, thinking that if most people take one, I take a half, I'm good.

I'm not trying to be like, I don't know who you are, I can't stand up, I'm just trying to be a little bit more comfortable and snooze, because you just can't, I personally can't sleep on planes, unless I'm in a lay flat. And this was no lay flap, this was me, head against the window, feet encroaching on my, the person in the middle seat. They were probably, by the way, can you imagine a middle seat on a red eye? Terrible.

Take a different flight. Unthinkable. It's unbelievable. So no. I wasn't worried, NARC, about overdosing on my gummies, and I had a wonderful flight.

Well, for our final beat, for our advice column this week, I think I need some advice, Ben. I was recently looking at my direct messages, as I tend to do here and there, a little bit of good housekeeping, and I saw a direct message from

famous Las Vegas magician and just famous magician Chris Angel who wrote me It's Chris Angel Please call me Josh His phone number Thank you Chris 2S's What the fuck do I do That is amazing

Have you ever met him? I have he was on grandfathered Which was the show I did with John Stamos years ago All right at least it's better now that you've met him What does he? want from you? I'm not sure. But I would call him.

Yes. And that would be something that I would do. I wouldn't ignore him. I would see what he wants. And whatever he wants, whatever Chris Angel wants, Chris Angel gets. Like, it just, it is what it is. I mean, he is the King of Las Vegas, but it's a lot of pressure, because you know he wants something. It's not just to hang out.

No, I don't know. Definitely not to hang out. He could come on and do magic on the show. Maybe we'll do a special in-person episode. He'll make me disappear or something. Can you imagine? Well, everyone, please give this podcast five stars on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, whatever, and mention in the comments what you think I should

say to Chris Angel. And I guess we'll let the people know next week how it goes. I think that's a wonderful plan. Wonderful plan. All right, guys. Yeah, thank you so much again. Rate us Apple, Stitcher, Spotify, iTunes, iHart, I this, I that, iPhone, anywhere you can get a podcast, I think we're there.

I say I think because we don't upload it. Somebody uploads it for us and maybe it gets up on time, maybe it doesn't. We're doing our best. Again, go rate five stars wherever you can listen. Listen to all the episodes. Listen to one, two, three. Now we're on four. Isn't it nice to be on four?

We're in a little bit of a rhythm, getting in a groove. And yeah, love this podcast. The Good Guys. Every Monday. new episodes. Thanks again for listening and we'll catch you next week. Love you, goodbye.