Good Guys - Wide Body Jet

Episode Date: February 15, 2024

Baconator and waffle fry fans raise your hands!! And click play! It's another gorgeous episode of Good Guys! From dissecting fast food favorites to Ben's pseudo-change of heart for Los Angeles, this is an episode you don't want to miss. Speakpipes include: first kiss advice, becoming an actor, and doubling your wedding budget! Watch on YouTube, follow the show wherever you get your podcasts, rate, review and give us 5 stars! If not.... what are ya nuts?! Please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode. Sponsors: Go to Quince.com/goodguys for free shipping and 365-day returns on you order Robinhood Gold gets you the most for your retirement thanks to their IRA with a 3% match.This offer is good through April 30. Get started at Robinhood.com/boost. Subscription fees apply. Produced by Dear Media. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The following podcast is a dear media production. I'm Josh Peck. And I'm Ben Safer. And we're the good guys. There's a lot of guys out there. And we're the good ones. Morning, morons. And if you're in Hawaii, Mahalo, morons.

Mahalo, morons. Yeah, that's cool. I did a, I think I told you this last night, Josh. I did a panel. It's weird. I was actually the one hosting a panel. I wasn't the celebrity on the other side of the panel. It was just strange.

It was just strange. It was a bit of a show. shots my ego, but it's totally fine. I'm going to work through it in therapy. I was hosting a panel and a woman at the end during the Q&A raised her hand and said, I have a question, but before I start, my husband's a huge moron. Love it. And like this crowd of like 300 people, like they don't necessarily listen to the podcast. They're like, what the hell is this lady talking about? I, it was excellent. I love that. I love that we are just, we have a clan, we have a nation, we have a movement of morons, the moron movement, and we just have a bunch of M&Ms out there.

And I think we could start our own insurrection one day if we really work hard enough. We should. With God on our side. Yeah. Yeah. We should do that. Rally up all the morons. Yes.

And go and storm the capital. But we don't storm the capital. We storm like a Betty Crocker or like. That works too. That works too. Or a, what is it? Cracker barrel? Yuck.

You like Cracker barrel? I you know what I do I love a country store flat out even if it's a corporatized one I love you know I have a mug that I got from the Orlando Cracker Barrel in 2013 I don't mean to brag and it's still my coffee mug till till this day it's nicely weighted it's very cool looking it's so me to have said Cracker Barrel ew I've never been there you've never been no it's not a New York thing I don't even know where I'd find a cracker barrel you're probably are they you'd probably have to go to the outhouse skirts of Pennsylvania, but once they start, they don't stop. Yeah, I don't want to go to the outskirts of Pennsylvania.

That's where you get shived. I'm out. But you could go, like, if you were driving, like, let's say you decided to drive the 95 down to Boka, then you're going to pass a couple dozen on your way down. Interesting. I wonder, do you think that, what do you think the crime rate is at Cracker Barrel? You think it's high? It depends on which city and state it's in, I'd say.

Understood. Right? Understood. What do you? Yeah. What kind of crimes do you think are happening? like people are stealing the biscuits and gravy? I don't know.

I just, I told you that story about when I went to a Denny's in the outskirts of Pennsylvania. It wasn't the outskirts. It was where the office is filmed. Starts with an S. What's that town called? Scranton.

Scranton. Oof. And I can't explain it. I just started looking at, I think you feel like a Denny's is like a cracker barrel. Aren't they similar? Similar vibe? Yeah, it's slightly different. Scranton, by the way,

birthplace of Joey Biden. Really? Ben goes, another knock against. Oh, good. Jeez, Louise. No, but he... Imagine I walked into that Denny's

and I just saw Joe Biden sitting there eating an omelet. Well done steak. You were going to make me steaks last week and it didn't end up happening because I think I made it too complicated for you. I told you I wanted you to get kosher steaks. You probably wanted to make your gorgeous Snake River Farms.

We get it. You're rich. I love Snake River Farms. And I did, you know, I honor it, But I did find that a little funny just because you're so not kosher in everywhere else. No, I really, I really am, except for Peter Lugar's once a year. And maybe one meal with you. But I mean, you'll go to any restaurant.

You just won't order meat. Correct. Correct. Correct. Look, look, I live by my own rules, but they're pretty cut and dry. For 99% of the year, I'm not eating non-coacher steak. I'm not eating milk and meat out in a rest. I'm not doing any of that.

I'm very, I'm very good. I'm basically a pescatarian, basically a pescatarian. And you don't eat tripe. You don't eat shellfish or trife. No, no, no, no, no, no. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no shellfish. No bottom feeders. No, folks.

Okay. I'm out on those. Okay. No pig. No pig. I'm just saying, what does it say about kosher? By the way, we're already going so hard. What does it say about kosher that a pig that's supposed to be very smart,

you can eat and the octopus. Did you see that movie the octopus? Is it the octopus lover? I did. I did. Another thing that I did. I implied that I saw, I didn't say it. I don't think it's called the octopus lover.

I think that's on porn hub. The octopus lover. I think it's called my octopus friend or something. The time I fucked an octopus, the octopus, the octopus nympho. But apparently they're very smart, very smart. So all I was going to say was, you know, maybe constrict's onto something. Don't eat the things that are really freaking smart. Cows are dumb as hell?

Or are they? I don't know. It's a bunch of interesting laws that were probably born out of 2,000 years ago. Our people were desert dwellers. And the elders of the tribe were walking around. And they said, you know, Moisha just dropped that. And they go, well, what did he die from? They're like, he found a clam in the middle of the Sahara.

And he ate it and he's dead. And they go, we got to tell him God said no clams. It's so true. Somebody probably just ate an old clam. Yeah, for sure. I mean, there is a level of cleanliness to it. But, you know, it's interesting, too, like all the different variations. Look, my brother is the same way.

He's a cafeteria Jew, as they would say. And he doesn't eat, he doesn't eat pork. and he's pretty observant, but he'll crush some calamari. I mean, he makes some exceptions. But it's interesting, I would wonder, I'd love to ask you, I asked him, because he's fairly observant. I was like, you know, your relationship with Judaism, like, do you get spirituality out of it?

And he said, no, I do it purely for guilt. He's like, I feel guilty if I'm not observant. and I don't honor the customs and traditions. And obviously he likes it and he's one of the greatest people I know. So he maybe just said arresting has a great moral fiber and sort of direction to his life. But do you find that you get spirituality out of Judaism or is that kind of separate? I get more spirituality out of Judaism than anything else. Really?

And it is definitely linked a little bit to guilt because I feel so spiritual and connected. when I do have that one Peter Lugar's meal a year, I feel terrible. I feel terrible. There's tons of guilt associated with it. And I know that that's not healthy because I also know being a very spiritual person that God could give two willies

if I have a nice meal, okay? I'm just having a nice meal. I know that he could give two willies, but there's something about preserving tradition that is important to me, doing our best, that's important to me, a constant reminder

that there's something bigger than us, you know? Yes. Not bigger than me. Never. Never bigger than me. me. But there's a big Rochester big and tall in the sky. God with a size 112 waist is up there looking down on us. How fat do you think God is? God, if God is in, if the kingdom of heaven

looks like a DXL in Texas, I'm in. I'm telling you. And St. Peter is like the bouncer for Rochester big and tall. I would love it. I mean, you know, like there's all these extra different brands of big boy brands. Like Ralph Lauren has a whole sort of side big boy brand like polo 5X and above. And to that I say great. Although I wonder at what point do you stop counting in X's and just go to tarp? Tarp. I'm a 1D.

I'm a one type. We are so fat-phobic on this show. I absolutely love it. If you're fat, fuck you. Oh my God. Guys, you're not going to say this last bit because I cut it out of the Descript. You're one of us. Look, fat people, you know how lucky we are to be fat?

And by the way, if you were fat or currently fat, it doesn't matter. Once you're fat and really fat for a considerable period of time. And by the way, we recently found out that Marshall, Marshall was fat. So Marshall's one of us. Totally. Permanently one of us. Total. If you've ever been fat, there's just something.

in you besides high cholesterol and besides tons of triglycerides that just makes you a funnier, better person. You're better. You're better when you were fat. Would you agree, Josh? Yes, I think it can add a wonderful layer to you, both figuratively and literally, but also with the advent of Ossempic, like, I don't doubt that in 20 years, like, if they start in some of our heaviest parts of America where people are really overweight, if it becomes a prerequisite, it like yeah, I got my flu shot and I got my OZempic for the year. Like it's just, it is going to change the course of human history. I mean, I guess us becoming this fat changed the course over the last 100 years, but it's going

to correct it? Is it going to, I wonder if if the way our bodies, the way they evolved, how we become resistant to certain things after a while, like if people will become resistant to the shot after it becomes so widely accepted because it seems like it's going to. Yeah, and you also wonder just with people being thinner, eating less, does it change what we put in our food? Like, that's the bigger conversation, right? It's what's in our food that's making us want to eat so much of it. Right.

Right? Like, if our foods were just, like, high in fiber and low in sugar and cleaner, then we wouldn't want to keep eating. But the reason we want to go to a Chinese restaurant and eat six pounds of sesame chicken is because that shit's crap. It's total crack. You're eating it. It's delicious. It's sugary. It's salty.

It's crack. Then you pop down to a Starbucks. You get what you think. It's just a nice coffee. But it's one of their special new coffees, the peppermy candy cane coffee, and there's 45 fucking grams of sugar. And then all of a sudden the entire day,

you're just pounding food, pounding food. So I do think that maybe with a reduction in the amount of food we're eating, maybe we'll see like the contents of food change. I don't know. But I feel like that's. more what would change human history than just the shot because the shot, I don't know, the shot's wonderful for now, but the truth is, like, when everybody goes off it, unless they totally change what they're eating, it's very hard.

The mental piece comes right back because the foods that we're eating are sugar. When I lived in Vancouver for a year, and I've stayed in Canada, I've shot a couple of things up there, and I always notice, I always stay at the Fairmont in Canada, Great hotel. Shoutout and Ben and I are more than available to come stay. Maybe do some free Instagram posts. Shout out Fairmont. I'm ready. I'm ready. I always notice, especially with my son, because when we went up there, he was about 20 months old. So he ate a major diet of honeynut Cheerios. It was like his go-to snack. Now, I became very accustomed to just, you know, the way cereal is, It's so fun to look at like the box.

It's always decorated in some cool way. There's always some fun new sweepstakes. And so I would look at the ingredients. And what was amazing to me was you'd go to Canada and it would taste exactly the same and somehow had half the ingredients. And I was like, so it's possible because they're much more strict and stringent the way Europe is with their food standards. It's possible to taste the same.

But they just don't do it here for whatever reason. I'm sure it's more cost effective. And another thing I noticed, and I had to really reset myself, was Canadian McDonald's, as we've talked about with the wonderful Claudia Oshry, is outstanding. It's gorgeous. And I remember I ordered barbecue sauce with nuggets or fries or whatever. And I take, I taste it and I go, what the hell is this? And it tasted the way barbecue sauce should probably taste.

It tasted like sweet tomato sauce. Like there was texture to it. There was like real ingredients in it. I said, oh no, no, no. I want the nuclear goo I'm used to. I want that red syrup. I don't want this shit. And it made me realize that McDonald's Canada was like, we cannot allow this red goo.

It's nuclear. But we crave the glue. The goo. We crave the goo. What? Title. What, Marsh? Title.

Title. We crave the go. But see, that's the problem because the goo is the crack. The goo is what we need. Yes. Once it tastes that goo, you need the goo. Did you know that even if you have a 401K for retirement, you can still have an IRA? Robin Hood has the only IRA that gives you a 3% boost on every dollar you contribute when you subscribe to Robin Hood.

gold. But get this. Now through April 30th, Robin Hood is even boosting every single dollar you transfer in from other retirement accounts with a 3% match. That's right. No cap on the 3% match. Robin Hood Gold gets you the most for your retirement thanks to their IRA with a 3% match. This offer is good through April 30th. Get started at Robinhood.com. Boost. Subscription fees apply. And And now for some legal info. Claim as of Q1, 2024, validated by radius global market research. Investing involves risk, including loss. Limitations apply to IRAs and 401Ks.

3% match requires Robin Hood gold for one year from the date of first 3% match. Must keep Robin Hood IRA for five years. The 3% matching on transfers is subject to specific terms and conditions. Robin Hood IRA available to U.S. customers in good standing. Robin Hood Financial LLC member SIPC is a registered broker dealer. Yeah. The sauces are everything. So by the way, fuck Canadian McDonald's.

I'm sorry. Like the sweet and sour sauce here, crack. Oh, let's play this game because I saw the Kelsey brothers playing it and they have a much bigger podcast than we'll ever have. But are they happy anyway? First of all, they were saying the best, what's, the best fast. Okay, let's do it by category. What's the best fast food burger? I'll give you time to think. Shake check. Hmm. Interesting. Say more. It's just great. Which one? I'm normally very kosher. I swear.

But when I'm not, just like the regular burger with the cheese and the shack sauce, I think the shack sauce is really, really great. I personally love, as you know, mayonnaise is my. is the condiment that dreams are made of. And when you incorporate mayonnaise into any sauce, like the shack sauce, it's a bit of a variation on Russian, right? So a little Russian-e dressing with that perfect smashed burger, with that gorgeous cheese,

with that thin, but not thin, that soft, like featherweight bun. Yes. It's fat, it's weightless. It's weightless.

Delicious. Delicious. I love that. Close second to me, I do really like in and out. I really do. I really do. But I think five, I think that, oh my God, I almost said five guys.

Five guys, I guess is good too. It creeped into my brain. I wasn't even thinking about them. Shake Shaq is my number one burger. What about you? You know, I would agree. I would say ShakeShack and Five Guys are an incredible burger. Unfortunately, I don't think of them in the same way I think of like the standard Mount Rushmore fast food, Wendy's, the King, Mickey D's.

So in that case, I don't. I would probably go best burger. Yeah, I got to go. I think I would go Wendy's. I think I would say that Wendy's has an incredible burger. The Baconator is at a sight. You'll never try it. It's literally a kosher atomic bomb.

But it is good. What's in it? It's really crispy nonstop bacon. Cheese and those square patties, Papa. Delish. Wow. Wow. The bacon.

The baconator. The baconator. You know they were at like, you know they were at a Wendy's board meeting and someone goes, maybe we should call it the baconator and so on what, fuck yeah, Phil, let's go get lunch. Somebody get Phil a promotion. Wendy should make like a version of Mortal Kombat where you're playing the baconator and it's just like a 350 pound guy just going up to the baconator and just punching him in the face. Fatty. I went to the Wendy's, I once went to Wendy's to teach them how to make social media videos.

In Columbus, Ohio, I went to the headquarters. It's a lovely campus. And I actually went there because it basically me and a couple other creators, we had done work for them. And they had employed us and were lovely. And so they wanted to kind of just do like an on site to talk. So they were nice enough to fly us out. And they were like, why don't each of you make a video with some of our employees? and then we can like watch it and just kind of see your process and you know like whatever you can

make in an hour so we all go off and one guy's doing this musical video because he makes musical TikToks or whatever and it's great and I'm like okay you know me you know go to comedy guy like let me bring the laughs so I get some of the employees together and I do like a mock office set up but I've got employees talking shit about each other documentary style let me tell you we all watch the TikToks, mine came up, not a laugh. Very uncomfortable silence. Spoiler alert, haven't worked for Wendy's since. I'm good. Look, we're going to work with Wendy's again, though.

Wendy's, here's our proposal. Wendy's, we're going to come down, you're going to fly us down. Definitely. You're going to hand us a sack of cash, but that's nothing to you. Absolutely nothing. Yes. And then look, you know what? Maybe we'll make a nice recipe video.

How about we, you know, we're going to get into Ben's Offer's Celebrity's Kitchen, Josh will be doing a voiceover. I'll be chopping away. We're going to make something beautiful for your Wendy's employees. What else can we do? We can do anything. Anything that you set your mind to that you have a budget for, we're in. So Wendy's give us a call.

And also while we're talking about this, we're looking for an airline partner. So you social media managers, call me. Call me. An American, if you're still working with us, I don't think you are. You can call me too, but I don't think you're working with us. So if you work, if you're social media manager at an airline, let us know. Yes. but also shout out American.

Let's do this thing, baby, 2024. I had an amazing American flight. I just have to say quickly, just shout out American. I had an amazing American flight back from Los Angeles. They had something that I didn't, I've never flown before. Have you ever flown a flight that has business class that's separate from first class in a domestic flight? I've seen it in international airlines, but I had never seen it domestic.

I got an upgrade $329 from. coach to business class. It was fantastic. It wasn't a full lay flat. It laid back 90% big seat, just two people. It was amazing. That's gorgeous. It's also known as a three cabin experience. It is, it does harken back to more of a classic flying experience when there was three different kinds of service on the same flight. I assume you were flying a Boeing triple seven, maybe a 787 dreamliner. I doubt a 767, but I do think. I think it was a wide body jet, which is also what they call me in my freestyle battles, wide body jet.

Yo, what's up? Son, on the wide body jet coming at you. 106 in Park, BET. You know, there's BET, but there's no JET. No, there isn't. We're missing the mark. One would say that it's all JET. I was going to make that joke.

Well done, well done. One would say that it's all JET. And that's the problem. Yeah, that's the problem. But yes, American Airlines, in fact, and listen, American, after we give you all this free love and shoutouts, I better get an email. You're not. You're not getting an email.

They're not listening. That's why, look, I give the shout out to American, but if you have another airline, we're up. We're free agents. But we really love American. The thing about their flagship first class is, oh, oh, okay, wait, before we get off. By the way, why don't we just talk to Brian Kelly about this? Why don't we talk to Brian? The PG can get us an airline partner.

Brian can get us an airline partner. Maybe a credit card. Can we get a credit card partner? What are we doing? Shouting into the abyss. Yeah, we need a credit card partner. We need an airline partner. We need a quick serve partner.

Yes. What else? What else? My shoes are rather dirty. I could use new. Merrill's in the DMs. I thought we gave up on Hoka. You're going back on what you said?

No, no, no, no, I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. I think Merrill can be our walking comfortable shoe partner. I say Sokony can be our running shoe partner. And I don't know. Who's our nice shoe partner?

Alan Edmonds? Josh, we can't be Merrill Sokony, Alan Edmonds. We can't be the Merrill men? Yes, we can. We're the Merrill men. I love it. Yes. I love it.

Merrill needs a mascot that's just a woman named Merrill. Yes. Can you imagine if Meryl Streep, anyone on the board of Meryl who hasn't handed Meryl Streep $10 million for a one-year deal should be asked to leave. Immediately. There's the door. What's your favorite fast food fry?

And please, Marshall, as a vegan, feel free to weigh in on this, even though I know that McDonald's cooks it in beef fat. Yeah, yeah. But. McDonald's cooks it and what? Beef fat. Tallow.

Really? It's like a beef flavoring. By the way, that's, by the way, that's why it's so good. I love McDonald's fries. Absolutely love it. They're so good. They're just like the perfect.

I don't like people like steak fries. I don't get it. You're like taking a bite out of a whole potato. I get it if you want like cubed potatoes, right? But the big fat steak fry, I never understood it. So I love a nice, thin McDonald's fry. Nice thin. That's my fry.

I like Chick-fil-A. A lot. The waffle fry from Chick-fil-A-Marchie? So fun, yeah. Wow. Waffle fries are good. But they got to be crispy. Wow.

And Marshall being okay with Chick-fil-A even after knowing their politics. Now that's a progressive man there. Why not take it back? I love it. McDonald's fries, though, are supreme for me. But it also might just be the sauces. That sweet and sour, I don't know what they put in it. I go a little sweet and sour into the barbecue,

and then when I'm done, I'll lick the inside. Oh, my God. Need to get every drop of that. What do we call it goo? That good, nuclear goo. Nuclear goo. I, um, yesterday I had a very interesting, parenting experience because my little son, my little 16 month old or 15 month old shy,

he had to get ear tubes, people. And I know feel that for me. He needed a procedure. And like Ben said, it's because my kids, they inherited my Jewish ear drums. And they are not the smartest ear drums. And so it's a wonderful procedure because basically they put these mini tubes that are like the size of a hair in the kid's ear drum. This way they drain.

They never need it. antibiotics again and they don't get ear infections because my son had one for like six weeks straight. But it's nerve-wracking because you got to put the kid under. So we wake up at 4.15 in the morning. We get him up. He's in a good mood. He don't know. He don't know where he's headed.

We drive. We get to the place. Beverly Hills Surgery Center. I'm doing well. I go in and I just had so many moments of gratitude. And I say that honestly. One, that I'm able to get this surgery for my kid. Two, that, like, it was such a real moment when the woman behind the counter was like,

do you have your insurance card with you? And I was like, wow, I'm insured. Wow, I am carrying my insurance card. Like, I am not the, I'm the kind of guy who goes, look, look me up. I don't have the card. You need a card. I don't walk around with proof. I had the absolute honor and privilege of spending a couple of hours.

You did. With these munchkins last week with Max and Shai. And if you don't follow us on Instagram at Good Guys, you're missing some wholesome ass content. Because we posted a beautiful, beautiful photo of our progressive family. And people absolutely loved it. And I loved it.

It's just such a sweet picture. Max is like way too good at basketball. I think that that shot, that shot thing is freaking rigged. He beat me like crazy beat me. It was just, it was sickening how many baskets. hit in such a short period of time. But just such unbelievably beautiful, cute kids. And we had an

absolutely wonderful time. And I do have something to say, which is not all of L.A. is like West Hollywood. Thank you. When I come on the podcast, we're doing it. You hear that Gavin Newsom? When I come on the podcast and I complain about Los Angeles, it's because West Hollywood is fucking disgusting. How Hollywood is fucking disgusting. All of these. areas that are nowhere near a beach. I'm sorry. I don't want to live there. I don't want it. I have no interest. But you go to the beach.

Gather up your shekels, folks. Throw them in a sack. Move to the beach because the beach is just gorgeous. My goodness. Trade your childhood for a beachfront home like I did. Oh, so worth it. So worth it. Really worth it. Just beautiful. And I came on probably not like the most beautiful day.

and it was still just perfect weather. Because any time you're able to just smell that sweet ocean is a good day. We loved having you. You were a mensch. It was so funny because my wife and her, you know, obviously we did let her younger sister and her husband know that Ben Soffer celebrity were coming over because they're both massive morons. And so they were inclined to come over and say hello.

But then it turned out that the entire mischbocha, the whole family came over, my wife's mother, her older sister Taylor, who we love. We love so much. And it was funny because it was a rare occurrence where this many of her family came over on the same night. And Ben being the men that he is when we left because he loved chatting with everyone because my family is truly the greatest.

But as we're walking and I'm showing him around the town just the two of us, he goes, so nice you have that family so close. Now the open door policy. It was nuts. It was honestly, it was like my big, that Greek wedding. It was cheers. Like your sister-in-law, like,

She didn't walk in with a cake, but it would have been like, come try my bun cake. I mean, am I living the guy you's dream down there or what? You are. It is just, it is, and it's what I've always wanted. I always wanted to get away from our people, Ben. Yeah, yeah, these are not Jews. These are not Jews, but these are tolerant folk.

These are allies folks. Tolerate folk. They would hide a Jew. They would. Yes. They did. They did. Totally.

So elevating my style used to mean like breaking the bank. whenever I wanted to get a couple nice pieces for the new year, for a new job, for something, I was always intimidated because I just knew it was going to cost me, if not a couple hundred bucks, maybe even a grand, but not with quince, right? Because you're going to get those high-end, versatile pieces at prices you can afford. You're going to snag all those killer luxury essentials that sync with your vibe and wallet. Like, okay, recently I got this Mongolian cashmere cruneck. It's like dope. It's timeless. It worked 20 years ago. It'll work today. to work in 20 years. And I was like, all right, what's this going to run me? 400, 300. It was 50 bucks.

Okay. They've got 100% leather jackets that are iconic, versatile, low-knit active wear. But quints, their items are priced 50 to 80% less than similar brands. And they use responsible manufacturing practices, which I love because I have a conscience and I'm a good person. Yeah, what else can I say? It's just going to get you those timeless pieces that are always going to work. work at a really great price and it's great quality. I don't know how you lose. So indulge in affordable luxury. Go to quince.com slash good guys for free shipping on your order and 365 day returns.

That's Q-U-I-N-C-E.com slash good guys to get free shipping and 365-day returns. Quince.com slash good guys. Is it too early for what do you nuts? Otherwise, I'll give two of them. No, I'm ready. But I have, well, do it and then maybe we'll do some speak pipe. Yeah, we'll do two of them because I have one on the beach. Okay.

You were there for this, but I needed to make sure that I told the moron. So Josh and I are walking along the beach. And again, it's perfect weather. Perfect. Mid-60s, I looked at 66, 66 degrees. Josh and I are walking by, and there's a girl on her mother, and I guess the mother didn't unlock the door to her car. And the girl is aggressively pulling the handle, pulling the handle.

Mom, let me in. I'm freezing. It's freezing out here. Let me in. I'm like, what are you nuts? It's 66 degrees. Freezing. She was wearing a sweatshirt, pants. See, this is the problem. One step forward with L.A. one step back. I find a place I like the people are miserable. You're freezing. You're freezing. What are you nuts? I love that. I think that is right on. I don't like that person either. And I hope, I hope, I wish you would know it. I do wish, I wish you would know it. Hey, I was thinking about this the other day. Do any of your streaming services have commercials?

And follow up question, am I cheap? None of my streaming services have commercials. You're not cheap. You're, you're thoughtful about how you spend your money. And if you ever need to borrow a username and password, you let me know. Doesn't work anymore. Yeah, no, Ted Sarandos, crackdown. the CEO of Netflix.

What the hell? Fuck that. By the way, you can't get a free Netflix account? That doesn't make any sense. No one has a free Netflix account. I think it might be folklore, but I've made movies for Netflix. Like literally Netflix, like produce movies, shout out.

And it's one thing they don't do. I guess it's a slippery slope. Maybe. All I have to say is, it seems cheap. Boo-hoo, you poor actors. Why don't you strike about it, you fucking pay? No. Just kidding, Sacks Strong.

Okay, my Woody and Nuts is about me because I'm really sick. The other day I was headed home with my son from a basketball game and we get in the car. And I made some like, I did some voice or something silly that usually would kill if he was under five. But he's five now. And so he's like aware of like what's actually funny. And he goes, dad, or no, he literally goes, I remember I did it. And there's a beat. And all I hear from the back seat is not funny.

And key, like a total reasonable adult goes, well, dad, everything can't be funny. Like, not everything is funny. And I wanted to be like, you know what these jokes have bought you? Everything. That car seat, those clothes, that basketball game, these jokes work. So Josh, what is? you nuts? You're debating your five-year-old on what's funny and what is it

because you're such a sensitive broken man. What are you nuts? That's nuts, huh? Especially Max. He's just so pure. And by the way, if Max didn't think something was funny, I got something to tell you. It sucked. It was shit. I can't believe it. But at night when I give him

a story and he really belly laughs and he goes, Dad, you're so funny. I go, that's better than playing Carnegie Hall, baby. Sorry, you were going to talk. No, I just have, like, I don't know what it was. I guess it was like a travel week. I have so many Wadian Nuts. Should I do one more? Yeah.

I have one more. All right, I'll let you pick. It's either a weather-related Waddy-Nuts, weather and airline, or a me, a Waddy-Nuts for me. I'll do the Waddy-Nuts for me because you just did a Waddy-Nuts. I go to this panel last night in New Jersey. I drove an hour and a half to get to the panel. That's not the Waddy-A-Nuts, but that should be a Waddy-A-Nuts.

I agreed to it three months in advance. I didn't realize it was an hour and a half away. It was very far. I'm talking on the phone with, like, the coordinator for this joint. And I'm asking her where to park. And she's like, oh, I see you in the white car, right? And swear to God, I go, it's not white. It's Barasco.

What are you nuts? What's wrong with me? Like, just because the Land Rover of Brooklyn told me my car was Barasco, it's white. It's white. That's what it is. It's a white gray. It's not white. It's gray.

It's barasco. But it's not, it's not white. You can't use the word barasca. That's nuts, right? You can't say barasco. I said to her, it's Barasco. It's Donnie Barasco. I corrected her.

I'm like, it's not white. It's Barasco. And she was nice enough not to say anything. But if you do need a beautiful car, that's Barasco from Jaguar, Atlanta, River, Brooklyn. I highly recommend it. That's really, I didn't realize that I thought she saw the wrong car. And you were clarifying for her. Like, no, it's, okay.

So she saw you and then you, yeah, that's really dushy. Oh my God. So nuts. She's like, is that you in the white car? It's not white. It's barasco. It's marijuana gold. I wanted to literally shoot myself in the face.

It was so terrible. Also, because I wonder if that's just a name that, like, I don't think, I've never heard of that as like a variant of white, right? Like, did Land Rover just come up with that variant? Shout out Land Rover. defender. We're big fans to Land Rover here. That's a really great question. If Land Rover did it, Land Rover, Land Rover. I don't know. No, but my car's like more of a gray. So I would assume the Barrasco is gray.

I don't know. By the way, we need a company car. I don't know where we put it. Do we just park it in Texas? Yeah, we put it in Kansas. Meet, meat in the middle. By the way, I mean, did you see all these nominations that Oppenheimer got for the Oscars? The Academy Awards? Yes, yes, I did. But please. talk about them. I want to reach out to the universal publicity and just be like, listen, no press, but you've got an ally here with one of the biggest podcasts in the game. So if Killian and or Emily and or R.D.J. and or Christopher Nolan want to come on the pod,

open invite, all the free spring mountain water they can drink. Open invite. That's it. Just, you know, no pressure. Zero. You imagine Nolan and Marshall, Yenting? I'd have to break them up. They would get so close. They'd have a great time. They would. Has no one, was Nolan fat or no? No, I think he's just perfect in every way, no matter what. He's just a guy that was born that way because he's, he's sturdy now. Well, yeah, the other day when my son was going for his, uh, when my son was going for his ear surgery, I would call him well fed, but his doctor looked at him and says, oh, he looks great. Wow. He's very, and I can tell us, he was like, looking for the right word.

She goes, it's very robust. I was like, just call him bad. Shai is so cute. He's like a little stuffed derma. He's a good piece of derma. He's so cute. I love it. He's so cute.

And I know that I said this to you, but it's just so funny. Like, shy is just, he's just so Jewish and so punch. And I see him and it's just like, this, this is Jewish blood. And I see Max and I see Max and he's so freaking cute, but I'm like, you are Irish Catholic. Yeah, totally. But so freaking cute. God, such cute kids. So lucky. So blessed. I only wish it for you and your gorgeous wife. And one day, Baruch Hashem, I'll be saying an alia at their bar or bat mitzvah or to be determined once they decide what they want to be.

Yes. Let's get to a speak pipe. If you want any advice, you have a question for the good guys, make sure it's something. something good. You can go to speakpipe.com slash good guys and we will answer your questions. Link and buy it on our YouTube page. Here's Ellie. Hey Josh and Ben. I absolutely love your podcast. It's my favorite. I just had a question. I was wondering what your guys's first kiss stories were. I'm a teenager and I haven't had my first kiss yet and I was just wondering how old you guys were when you had your first kiss. And if you have any advice for me or anyone else on kissing, thank you.

Oh, my God. Marshall, are we allowed to answer this? I feel like a creep. I feel like it's cute. Okay. Right? Marshall said it's okay. By the way, I thought it was totally fun.

Okay, yeah. Oh, I agree then. Go, go for you, Ben. All that I was going to say is, Josh, we have teenage fans. Wow, crazy. That's hard. The fact, if we can get Gen Z, if we can get them hooked,

I know that we have the millennial women. We even have the boomers. You know, we're in that prime sweet spot of 40 to 90-year-old Jewish women. That's our demo. But if we can get 15-year-olds, then they convert their parents,

their cousins. Fantastic. So all I got to say, tell all your friends in school. Tell them all. Kissing story. You know, it was at camp. That's what you do at camp.

Camp is where you go and you have a first smooch. I was 13, 14, something like that. Best day of my life. Best day of my life. It was after a lovely meal.

You go on a nice week called Shabbas walk. Take a nice Shabbas walk. Take a nice Shabbas walk. Take the young lady by her hand. The Jewish Taylor Swift would have a song called Shabbis Walk. Lay on a good smooch. And you go back to the bunk and you're like, Yeah! We did it!

So look, if you find a lovely fella that you want to smooch, I say, go for it. Nothing, you'll never, you'll always look fondly on your first smooch. What I... Lo pressure. What I would say is don't feel pressure because I think that we naturally, sometimes we just put the pressure on ourselves because we feel like by a certain age we should have had our first kiss or whatever, but it's about, it happening with the right person at the right time and there is no right time.

The right time is when you feel most comfortable and there is dual consent and that's all I'm gonna say. All right, next question from Ali. What's up good guys? My name is Ali. I am a Jew here in Orange County, California. And I kind of had an intrusive thought that I couldn't get out of my head. So I was watching the Big Bang Theory.

No, not the episode. You are in Josh, but you played a great comic book store manager. But there was a scene where Howard was using a robotic hand. This isn't really good. This one stinks. Sorry, Allie. Now I'm remember. Okay, this next one is from Kimberly.

Hey, guys. My name's Kimberly. And I was hoping to get a little advice from you all today. So I recently decided to lean. into my childhood dream of acting. And the only thing is I'm 27 and I just had my second kid. So I don't know. I think maybe it's a little bit of me second guessing myself.

But I was wondering if you guys had any words of encouragement or any like good tips or tricks to help. I have set up to get my head shots taken this weekend. And my husband is super supportive. I'm only like really looking into. to doing little small things to get my foot in the door, a little commercial, little social media ad here and there, whatever. But I am definitely nervous.

This is something new. This is something I've always wanted to do. And thankfully, I've got lots of support, but, you know, I've always got that voice in the back of my head saying, am I too old for this? Like, I don't know. So any advice you guys could give, any tips, anything would be greatly appreciated.

I love you guys so much. doing what you do. Okay. Love you too. Josh, please take us away. What I would say, first I love that she's like not looking to do anything big. Like if James Cameron called me, I'd have to pass, not trying to be away in Australia for nine months on Avatar 11.

Here's what I'm a big fan of side hustles. I'm a big fan of going for your dreams part time because I think that the bi-price, you know, the byproduct of you building a nice life. It sounds like you have a lovely life that, you know, you're the mom of two kids, which is a total full-time job, and I'm sure requires so much attention and hard work. And the fact that you realize, and I think this is very true, I heard David Mamet, one of the great American playwrights, directors, writers interviewed the other day, and he's in his mid-70s and still writing movies and plays and television more relevant than ever. And Bill Maher, the interviewer, said, how is it possible to be in your mid-sevent?

and this prolific and he goes, I'll tell you how, I never got into golf. No shade on golf to my wonderful golf loving friend, Ben. But, you know, he's just like, I have a lot of time and not a lot of hobbies. So I spend it working because I enjoy it. So I would say that if you have time to go after something that you've always dreamed about and you're able to still, you know, direct your major attention towards your family or whatever it is that brings you an income, do it, babe. Do it with abandon.

Don't have, you know, try to turn down that shitty committee in your head, that self-doubt, and just go for it. 27 is young. If you're doing it at 57, there's a part for every age. It's cool. It's the antithesis of athletics. Like there's no finite nature to it. You can literally create and be an artist forever.

So my hat is off to you. I wish you luck. And do not ask me for any favors. I think that's great advice. I'd also say just don't make a big deal out. of it, right? Like, Josh and I started this podcast as a side hustle. We didn't make a big deal about it. You'll see people all the time. And Josh, we never talk about this. This is an ultimate wedding. And that's people launch a podcast and they throw a freaking party for their podcast. And it's

like, you don't have any freaking listeners. What are you, what are you throwing a party for? And so the way that I feel the same way about every side hustle. Like you're, you're able to be a mom and work and do whatever you do and still get head shots made and audition and do all those things. If you happen to catch something that takes up more time, then maybe you have to see if you have to give something up. But in the meantime, don't make it a big deal. You said you and your husband are going to get headshots. Don't make it.

You've gotten your head shot taking a million times. It's a picture, right? Like don't make things a bigger deal than they are. Just do them. Do it all. And then you'll look back and you'll see, oh, you know what? I started to put the things in place that I could succeed.

And if acting doesn't work out, consider real estate because you are. already have the head shots. Bingo. Bingo. Okay, last one really quick. Hey guys, huge moron over here. I have a really good question for you.

But first, I just kind of feel the need to let you know. I have COVID and ear infection and pink eye going on all the same time. I got coughed and farted on. I've just been waiting for my prescription for 45 minutes in my car. And I'm really angry and I wanted to tell someone. Anyway, so I won't be telling you my name because I'm a very paranoid person and I'm terrified everyone in my life will hear this. But here's a bunch of identifying details about me.

I have a very Catholic family and it's pretty much common knowledge that I'm getting engaged this year. So naturally me and my mother talk about it all the time. And my mother basically told me that if I wanted. double of my allowance, I don't know what to say, budget for my wedding, that I needed to get married to the Catholic Church. But the problem is, me and my boyfriend are not religious. So to get married in a Catholic Church, we're going to have to do, like, counseling, like torturous, childhood trauma counseling. And I just need to know, do you think I should rely to a priest and have a kick-ass wedding?

Or do you think I should stay true to myself? Love you both. Goodbye. Wow. There's so much to unpack. So much. Pink eye and COVID all at once. You're disgusting. Good luck on your wedding day.

No, I'm just kidding. You're rich, though. You have two options. You're going to have a great wedding. Or mommy's going to give you double the bag. If you do it in the church, I would do it in the church. Lie to the priest. He lies to you.

Lie to him. Fuck it. Go bigger, go home. Yeah, I think if anything, this is the biggest getting back at the Catholic Church is by taking their money and never going back again. I agree. I think, like, it's one thing, like, my wife and I come from different faith. But if I was Catholic or she was Jewish and we got offered to get double the bag, I mean,

if you're into that sort of thing and you really want to do it up, like you need to have that photo booth with the filter on it that makes everyone. look much better than they actually are. Those things are a lie. They're a lie. I love them those people. That's a what are you nuts. Don't post the photos of you in the photo booth at the event and or the wedding.

We know you don't look like that, okay? Unless there's like a middle ground where you can have the wedding that you want and she won't double the bag, but she'll give you an extra half a bag that you can put in your pocket. Yeah. Like can you just can you squeak a little money out of this? That's the question. Or what you say. I'll do it at the church, but I want an extra bag for my pocket.

Heck, mommy duffel bags. Mommy duffel bags. Give me an extra bag for the pocket. I'll go and do it at the church. Inbezzle from your own family. And because we gave you this advice, we also want to get a wedding and a condo. We want a bag. We love you.

Thank you guys for listening. Shout out the good guys. Give us five stars. Write a review. It means the world to us. And it helps the podcast unless it's not a good review, in which case, throw your phone out the window. And look, recommend the podcast to a friend.

Even if you're doing work, just passively have a playing. I don't care if you're listening. We just need those listens up. So play it all day long. Start at 9 a.m. to 9 p.m. Just press play. And, you know, if you catch some great funny content in the middle, that helps too. But just play it on repeat.

Leave a review. If you don't leave five stars, what are you nuts? And have an absolutely glorious day. We have so many unbelievable episodes coming out soon. The Mondays and Thursdays, it's a hit on Mondays and Thursdays. We're working overtime. Show us some love in the reviews and recommend to a friend. Please note that this episode may contain paid endorsements

and advertisements for products and services. Individuals on the show may have a direct or indirect financial interest in products or services referred to in this episode.