Good Job, Brain! - 157: Beautiful in Every Way

Episode Date: July 28, 2015

Let's spend a day prettying ourselves up! Ah, how about a nice relaxing snail facial to give your visage a nice fresh look? Or maybe you want to indulge in a bird poo treatment? Let's play a spa-themed game of "Place, Person, or Thing?" and discover the quasi-standard unit of beauty. (Yes! There *is* a unit that describes beauty!) We debunk home beauty remedies, and look! There she goes that girl is so peculiar; with a dreamy far-off look, and her nose stuck in a book. THAT BELLE! Chris finds out if Beauty and the Beast is indeed a tale as old as time. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

You're listening to an Airwave Media podcast. Hello, favorite fact-facing friends feasting for phenomena founded from philanthropists feeling fantastic. This is Good Job, Rain, your weekly quiz show, an offbeat trivia podcast. Today's show is episode 157, and of course, I'm your humble host, Karen, and we are your peppy platoon of Poindexter's please to present plenty of pleasurable podcasting. I'm Colin. I'm Dana. And I'm Chris. That first alliteration is from our friend, Louise, who wrote in.

That was one of the longer ones we've ever had. Good job. And this episode is brought to you by Harry's, the destination for quality and affordable men's and women's shaving needs. Women have to shave, too. But not really on our face. We're awkwardly clarified. We are mammals.

It's nothing you can do. You have to run away from that as a woman. You don't have to shave, but if you do feel like shaving, Harry's is a great... Well, you know, I don't want to put pressure on anybody. It's true. I like that. Yeah.

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and $15 gets you a set that includes handles three blades shaving cream shipped to your door in a fancy package and you can even customize your own shave subscription plan according to your hair growth in preference I've used Harries on my legs Yeah I gotta keep them aerodynamic for my races

Right yeah every every millisecond counts Yeah And of course you can visit Harries.com H-A-R-R-Y-S Harry dot com You use the promo code Brain to save $5 off your first purchase

And we have a I went to go to our PO box Our mailbox And we got a whole bunch of stuff Mail Day Kevin sent us a game And if you are a fan of our regular segment Brad Pitt or Lasers

You will like this game called Timeline It is kind of like a card game Kind of similar premise as Brad Pitt or Lasers You get these random things And you're trying to put them in order Of their inventive or born Yeah and they're just really random And there's like expansions

There's a general version And there's like you know really specific ones So go check it out It's called Timeline and thank you, Kevin. Thanks to we've gotears. Etsy.com. This was crazy. For sending me.

You personally. Me personally. Yeah. A handmade mouse ears that you, you know, from Disney. They look is so cool. Just a generic mouse. Not any specific mouse. Oh, yeah, yeah.

Just mouse ears. Yeah. You know, mice have ears. Mouse X, large, round ears. Yeah, two circles. But they're orange bird. They are orange bird. Yeah.

It was handmade from orange bird. fabric and it has like a little orange bird bow so thank you so much that is my favorite character a lot of people are actually tweeting and in facebooking they're like we keep seeing orangebird it's like beta mine off you talked about it now you see it and now you can appreciate it's uh it's origin so thank you so much at we've gotears. Etsy.com and we have another special letter Chris it's a listener letter we're going to read some of it it's written uh in uh it's handwritten on loose leaf paper. College ruled.

College, no, this is not college rule. I don't think that's college ruled. This is not college rule. This is regular, regular ruled. Middle school ruled. We'll have to talk about the difference between college rule. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah. Dear G.J.B., hi. I'm Olivia, an 11-year-old listener. I was picked to read this letter, by the way, because I'm the closest thing we have to an 11-year-old girl. An 11-year-old listener, I've listened to almost all your podcast in a little under a year. I really like intricate words, learning foreign languages, reading and writing and dancing she almost put a period i think at the end of writing no there was a

period at the after reading and then that's crossed off and then it says and writing there was a period and then that was turned into a comma and dancing we appreciate your thoroughness what a busy 11 year old yeah yeah yeah i know you guys get tons of fan mail and requests tons is i mean it's relative it's relative did you mean to write tens of fan milk um but i think it would be pretty cool if you use my alliteration in your next podcast well guess what olivia that's going to happen right now it and her alliteration is this welcome quizzical and quabbling queer queens and quackas quitting quidditch i really like quitting quidditch oh i don't aren't they animals yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah i like quitting quidditch yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah and uh someone in olivia's life is going to sit down

with her and explain what queer queens means. Yes. So, um, not just strange royalty. Exactly. Um, but we know was written in that in that spirit. Are we looking at a quaka? Yeah. A little kangaroo-y. They're a little, yeah. They're from Australia. Yeah, they're marsupials. By the time you receive

this letter, Olivia writes, I will have gone to a superhero trivia at my local library. Well, I hope that worked out. Yes. Oh my God. I want to go to a superhero trivia. I would destroy everyone. All the children. It looks like Olivia's is going to do pretty well. because she's already studying up and asks,

did you know that Batman doesn't have any actual superpowers? I did know that. Yes. Thank you. None of us wanted to say it. Is cash money a superpower? No one.

No, no, no. Batman is the greatest detective. So I would say he does have an above average deduction. It's right at the limit of human capability. It's at the high end of human. That's true. Well, well said, Dan. I watched a documentary, and they talk.

About that. Olivia attaches a massive list of weird facts. It is totally impossible to sneeze with your eyes open. Is that true? As a kid, as a kid, I used to try and, like, hold my eyes open. But you'd hold them open. But your reflexes. It just hurts.

Yeah. Yeah. There is a, oh, this is good. There is a 99.5% chance that mermaids and unicorns are real. What? Because only 0.5% of the ocean has been explored. Oh. Yes.

and a host of other things So I would go mermaids, yes Unicorns Underwater I don't think the underwater Unicorns is going to happen What's of a Unamade? We may have to cross off the Mercorn

Mercorn Mercorn It's still It's a narwhal It's a narwhal It's a narwhal Oh wait A narwhal is a mermaid

And a unicorn Oh okay Morekorn Yep There's no human part though on the narwhal The heart Oh

The soul That poor thing well thank you very much Olivia for this lovely lovely letter and some more housekeeping some some really cool updates uh so last episode we talked about fantasy slash fake food Tamara wrote in she was very very pleased that I talked about foods that you didn't know that were fake or imposter foods such as like wasabi isn't really real wasabi uh and Colin I blew your mind with a fake blueberry yeah the little blueberry bits those little injections Shins of blue berries, yeah.

Yeah, just die. So, Tamara said, it remind me of some of the fake crazins my mom was eating. They were just dyed blueberries. But also, just about every single fruit-flavored oatmeal has dried apples in it. If it's blueberry flavor, it is blue-dried apples. Banana flavor is yellow dried apples. Peach flavor is pink-dried apples.

That makes so much sense. It really does. Like, the texture is totally. the same. You can't tell. Fleshy. That's why they always use the word flavor on the front of the package. You know, it's blueberry flavor or whatever.

So that, I was like, oh my God. The peach is not peach. It is peach-flavored apple bits. Also, another follow-up on something we talked about before. David Murray from UK said, I saw this in Time Out London, which I believe is a publication. Yes. And wanted to share. So remember, Chris, when you talked about the Death Ray Building.

I do. There were two. One was in Las Vegas, the Vodara, which got fixed. And one was the Wauki-Taki building in London, which also got fixed. Yes. But now there's another problem with the Waki-Toki building. What happens because it's curved? Yeah.

It creates what they're calling the down draft effect. So wind would come, hit the curve surface, and get redirected down. And so people on the street are getting blasted. But this building From above Yes This building is just This is why we don't have

Curved buildings Why don't we have curved buildings? They don't need to find out Let's see We didn't notice these problems On the little tiny phone model Yeah School for ants

Well thank you everybody For your updates and your fan mail And without further ado Let's jump into our first general Trivia segment quiz hot shot okay here i have a random trivial pursuit card and you guys have your barnyard buzzers this trivia pursuit card is from pop culture too okay so i'm hoping we'll do we'll do good all right okay um here we go tv blue wedge for tv what actor was hired to fill the void left on the original

law and order by jerry orbach's departure oh oh Colin i think that was Dennis Farina. Oh, my God. Yeah, yeah. He's a veteran. Yeah. He just doesn't... Really?

Yeah. Oh, I guess like more of a copy. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. He was on crime story years ago. Jerry Orbach. Loomier.

Nobody can replace Jerry Orbach in my heart. Yeah. You know, his eyes are donated. Yeah. He donated his eyes to the city of New York. Yes. Yeah. So there are people...

There are two people in New York. With his eyeballs? Yes. Jerry Orbach's eyes. Yeah, Jerry Orbach's eyes. Do they get a whole pair or do you just get one? You just get the one that you need, I think. I think so, too.

Maybe you need both, I don't know. Yeah. When you donate eyes, they're wired left and right, but like, just the eyeball organ, can you plop them in either left or right sockets? That's a great question. Excellent question, probably. Yeah, because it's the nerves. I would guess probably.

Or you just flip it over, you know, you just rotate it. Oh, yeah, yeah. Oh, but then you would see everything upside down. Yeah, well, sure. Well, that's what glasses are for, though, Chris. Oh, true. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What?

Wow. I thought we're supposed to be a fax show. I would have to, if I were to make an educated guess, well, I couldn't do that because I'm in no way. If I were to make a from my butt guess, I would say you can swap your left and right eyeballs. That's a really interesting question. That is an interesting question. Where is the hardware? If you, dear listener, have performed and I transplant.

Please enlighten us now. All right. Next wedge, pink wedge for fad. What color dresses do members of the over 50 red hat society traditionally wear for official outings? I actually know this. Uh, date out, purple. Yes, not red. What is this?

That is a red herring. It's like a club for older ladies. Huh. They do. You'll start saying it everywhere. Now that you know about it, look for like a hat. It has a purple sash around it around. Right, right, right.

Yeah. So when I do, now that I'm pushing 50s. No, no. Like, now you'll see it. Just like, it's a community. When I run the Disneyland Tinkerbell Half Marathon, they're famous. Like, they just have, like, all of the Southern California Red Hat Ladies Society line up and they cheer for you. It's very cute.

I believe Marge joined a parody version on the Sixthens even, yes. My mom talks about joining sometimes. She won't. I'm sure she won't. She's not going to do it. But she wants to. I think she likes the idea of it. All right, Yellow Wedge for Buzz.

what song did Colin Powell Donning a Hard Hat and strapping a hammer to his belt parody at a 2004 Jakarta security conference What a Chris 16 tons?

No, oh, that's a good guess I'm trying to upgrade the hard hat and the hammer Who was it? Colin Powell Colin, Colin, Colin. He said Column. It is YMCA. Yeah, that's a good guess, YNCA.

Why did he do that? Why is it, why is it Colin? That's weird. He pronounced it colon. Like the organ? He spells it. He spelled the way I spell my name. He just pronounced it differently.

You know, I had a co-worker who, another column that's C-O-L-A-N. And it's really hard not to get colon. Colon. So commonal. All right. Purple Wed for music. What Bob Marley Classic offers the comforty line, little sister, don't shed no tears. Dana

No, dear No woman, no cry Yeah Everything's gonna be all right Green Wedge for movie What movie featured Rosie O'Donnell as a cop Undercover at a Sex spa

In full dominatrix Spagalia Is it exit to Eden? Correct Oh yes Yes And Dan Aykroyd Yeah

And Dana Delaney Maybe She was the Mistress or something Whenever anyone says Dana Delaney, which is not that often in my life, but whenever anyone says Dana Delaney, like my brain follows it up with, Anna Maniacs. Oh, Dinna Manny.

Totally insaney. Last question, sports and games. What sport could boost its U.S. fan base by letting players, quote, use their hands, according to ESPN the magazine. Oh, interesting. Chris? Soccer? Yeah.

Must be soccer. Yeah. It's dumb. What a weird question But that's the whole point of the game Yeah I think that's the that's the point That's the point It's supposed to be a very kind of cynical thing

It's like Americans will only watch it if you could use your hands I feel though like this card is probably 20 years old Because like soccer in the U.S. is far more popular now That's true That's true Yeah it seems like an old card Cool good job brains So this week's topic is inspired by

Man lots of listener contribution today from Natalie and she wrote in and she said it's really really sweet it was really touching she says I think everyone is beautiful in their own way with this being said I'd love to hear a podcast about different beauty regimens from across the land though we don't have a water cooler at my job I like to always bring something interesting to our time clock chat to get the day rolling water cooler is that what is that like around the water cooler at the office Is that a... Is that an idiot?

Yeah, it is an idiot. It's like the break room or something like that. That's been... Water cooler conversation. Hanging out away from your desk with my co-workers. Oh. Right. Or like you talk, like the whole thing about TV shows being water cooler shows.

Like shows that you have to watch because everyone's talking around the... Oh, my God. That makes sense. Yeah. It's an old expression. Got it. It's an older office. I've been in offices that had them.

Yeah. Me too. But you probably have like a drinks refrigerator and like a snack cupboard. Yeah. You know, around the snack cupboard. Yeah. I mean, if you work at a... Around the vitamin water freezer.

Yeah, that's the modern equivalent. It's kombucha. Around the... Yeah, the kombucha. Yeah, we have the cold coffee keg tap. So I guess... Oh, the first you do. Just substitute that for water cooler.

What did you guys have the other day? They were making crepes in the office or something like that. Oh, yeah, for dinner. Yeah. And people come and make crepes. Yeah. Sure. The catered.

Dot com. Yeah. Oh. dot TV um so yes nallie this week we're gonna honor your suggestion it's a very very awesome uh and actually pretty interesting topic so this week we're gonna talk about beauty come on you beautiful i just want you to know you're my favorite girl i know you don't lose it this new snoop come on baby book you got to get into it I will start us off.

I have a quiz for you guys about home beauty remedies. Okay. Okay. You know, these are things that you may have heard passed down or seen on the internet or, you know, read in a magazine perhaps. Right, right, right, things that may or may not, in fact, be valid. Home beauty tips, remedies. So I'll give you guys the statement and you tell me if this is true or false. Okay.

These have been evaluated by professionals and, you know, dermatologists and things of that. Are we all going to work together? How are we going to do this? Thumbs up, thumbs down. Okay, thumbs up, thumbs down. So I'll read the questions. You guys do you need. Thumbs up or thumbs down for True or False.

All right. Here we go. True or false. You can use Preparation H, the haemeroid cream, to treat bags under your eyes. You know, it's funny because I know hemorrhoid is something to do with butts. But I don't know what it is. Do you guys actually know what it is? Well, that might be, that might be, that might factor into the answer here.

Colin will explain it. Everyone says true. This is true. Yes, you can, you can use preparation age. So a hemorrhoid, Karen, at its simplest, it's like a swollen blood vessel, basically, in your butt region. Bottle area. You don't want it. Oh, by your, by the hole.

Yes. Yeah. We're in the tube area. Yeah. Oh, so it's not like a zit on your butt. I thought it was a zit on your butt. That's like a carbuncle maybe. That's called a Zit on your butt cheek.

Yeah. Yeah. And the primary treatment for hemorrhoids, you know, medically is just to shrink them. And so, you know, preparation H and other hemorrhoid creams, basically it's a small amount of, you know, cortisone in there. And the same action will, in fact, shrink and tighten up if you've got bags under your eyes from a night with no sleep. This is like an old show business trick. They use this a lot for talk shows and things like that. Do people have hemorrhoids that much that there's so many creams?

are made or do you think now half of the hemorrho cream like supplies for you know people use it for so so so the dermatologists do say this isn't something you should use regularly uh on on your eyes as a treatment you know but but once in a while if it's an occasional thing it will in fact work yeah okay so this is what i've been told before but it's like as you get older the your the walls and your body start to break down a bit so older people get hemorrhoids kind of a lot that's a like a normal thing. So it actually directly... Pregnant women can get it to.

So it directly affects the blood vessel. It tightens up the skin. It has like a cortisone, like a shrinking action basically. Yeah. And the thinner the skin, the more effective it is generally. Yeah. Don't do it too much. Don't get it in your eye.

Oh, no. That's the scary thing. True or false, you can use toothpaste to treat a pimple. Oh, man. I do this actually, but I might. Karen and Dana say true. Chris says false. This is true.

Yes. This is true. Yes, you can put it just a dab a little bit of toothpaste on a pimple. It will, in fact, dry up the pimple. Most toothpaste, it's both the mint action and also the fact that a lot of toothpastes have basically, you know, clay or clay-like substances in the minute. Both will work to dry up a pimple. Huh. Yeah.

Yeah. True or false? You can use monoeuvre. Manistat, which is a yeast infection cream treatment, to treat dandruff. Oh, I've never heard of this. Oh, that's interesting, though. I don't know why you would. Dandruff, it might be like a yeast kind of infection, like a fungal.

Yeah, but I think dandruff is drying of the scalp. Oh, you think, oh, it might get like a bacteria thing. Fungus or bacteria. I know they're different, but, yeah. I thought Modestack came, like, is like a, like a... He said you can use it. Yeah, again. None of these products are marketed to the different.

My lack of... Podcat. Sorry. Podcat is in the building. Since there's been a bunch of truths, I'm going to say it's false since there have been two truths and are, that's not, I'm going to game it. Oh, yeah, okay. Chris and Dana say false.

Karen says true. This is generally believed to be true. Yes. Yes. Now, this is where it gets even more interesting. There are a lot of, there's a sort of a, uh, an underground. belief out there that you can use monostad or used infection cream to treat hair loss as well so there are a lot of women primarily but there are a lot of people who have used this either on bald spots

on their head or to treat dandruff so the second part oh my god cat you're eating our listener male oh no the cat ate the listener male what do you do my dog ate my listener mail yeah my dog my homework, my cat ate my listener mail. The second part, the jury's still out on that one, whether it can actually regrow hair. They've not done any clinical trials. The only evidence for this so far is anecdotal at best.

But they do say that the antifungal, kind of antimicrobial nature of it, it can in fact treat dandruff. Now, there are easier ways to, and probably cheaper ways to treat dandruff, but it does work, it would work. Well, if you're looking for a multi-tool

And if you have some left over It's like, well, the yeast infection cleared up And I just sitting around You don't want to be wasteful Yeah, what could I use it for? True or false You can use diaper rash cream To treat acne

True or false Diaper rash cream Yeah, I don't have much experience With diaper rash cream in my house But Is it so it dries up It makes it so it's not moist Is that what it does?

right oh yeah I mean Diper rash creams are heavy with zinc oxide Yes Oh so then probably True All right

Everyone says true This is false In fact Yeah dermatologists Do not recommend Using diaper rash cream For your acne Wait

But does it work But does it work? It does not It does not on balance work Because the zinc oxide Is actually so heavy It can be more likely To clog your pores

Than any treatment that the zinc oxide might beneficial have. Yeah, you should use acne medication or toothpaste. Okay, got it. Or toothpaste. Last one. Last question. True or false, you can use peptobismol.

Okay. Okay, off the shelf, peptobismal. The pink stuff. The pink stuff for acid, stomach acid. The heartburn, diarrhea, yes, upset stomach. You can use peptobismol to shrink your pores. You can put it on your face and shrink your pores. I have a big poor problem.

I've never heard about this before. Hmm Shrink this mal on your pores I don't think you should I don't know I'll say false Chris says false I want to be true so then I can try this at home Karen says true

I'll say false Dana says false it is true Let's go guess them And now to the extent that it is true It's because of the salicylic acid In the peptobismal And in fact that's what's in aspirin So you know aspirin is that this

You have also, I hadn't heard this before. You can put aspirin on your face as well, also to tighten pores. And this is true. It will have that effect. When you just rub it on your face? You could like crush it up and, you know, into powder and make it into like a little paste or something. Right, right. And again, you know, you want to be careful with how often you do this and the amount that you use.

But yeah, yeah, the ass, the salicylic acid and peptobismal does have a poor tightening effect. Man, I was waiting for cheese whiz to show up somewhere in this place. I feel like I'm okay with the size of my pores. Okay, you're comfortable. Your pores are okay. My pores are big. I have You have man-poor.

Yeah. Because you're a man. Thanks, Dad. That's right. All right. Well, now you guys know if you have various creams, ointments, liquids,

lotions, you can put them all over your body. You can sometimes put them on multiple parts of your body. Mostly just your face. So just go through the cabinet, take out whatever it is. And just put it on your face

and see what happens. You'll be beautiful. It'll probably be fine. Yeah. I will say as a blanket closure here, the dermatologist. History never says goodbye. It just says,

See you later. Edward Galliano was right when he said that. Events keep happening over and over again, in some form. And that's the reason I produced the podcast, My History Can Beat Up Your Politics. What is it? We take stories of history and apply them to the events of today to help you, perhaps, understand them better. We are also part of Airwave Media Network. I've been doing the program since 2006. That's a long time, and the show has a long name.

My history can beat up your politics. Find me wherever you get podcasts. While speaking of crushing things and put it into a pace and put it on your face, I have researched two very unusual beauty rituals. Oh, yes. And this is around the world. Both of these are facials, like they're facial treatments, things that you put on your face to make your face look better, younger, smoother, whatever it is.

Beautiful. And they have, they both involve animals. Great. I'm on board. What do you mean? So the first thing is called the Uguisu No Fun. No fun. Okay.

Sounds great. Fun? Fun. Wind? No, as in poop. Oh, it's in poop. Yeah. Fun.

Well, in Chinese it's fun. Oh, okay. Uguisu, no fun. Well, there's a spoiler. It's poop. It is Nightingale droppings. Okay. All right.

And it is from Japan, and this is not a new thing. This has been in practice for years and years and years since the Hay-on period in Japan, which is about 800. AD. So, long time ago. So it was introduced to Japan by the Koreans, and back then, cultures of that region would use guano and different types of excretions from different animals to remove dye, to remove dye from fabrics, and using it to make fabric patterns. The bird droppings, very specifically, the Asian Nightingaleigh Droppings, it could remove stains. They noticed it could remove stains from, silk garments so very like very kind of um finicky fabric on delicates yeah delicates and so they're like hey let's put it on our face yeah right yeah well so the life is short it's funny because being now here in america like people want to be tanned right you want to go get a nice tan or you put a bronzer to look sunkiss to look healthy you have that idea of being outdoors and healthy in other

parts of the world, it's the opposite. You want to look porcelain. You want to look very, very pale. Because it means that you're rich and you never go outside. Yeah, you're not working out on the fields. Yeah. And you know, growing up in Asia, that is, you

know, there's a lot of skin bleaching products and stuff to make yourself very, and I'm naturally tan, so I never, yeah, I just never fit in. But anyways, so knowing that squano and especially this particular nighting gale droppings

brightens something like silk they're like hey let's put it on her face what's going to happen right and women used to mix it up the the poop they would dry it right they would have cages and they scrape off all the all the poop

and you know just so you know when I say bird poop birds poo and pee it's all in that thing yeah yeah they don't have two systems the white and the brown it's all in that one it's all in one system so they scrape it they dry it, they crush a new powder, and it mix it with rice bran, and then

you know, mix it with some water and you put it on your face. And this is also called a geisha facial because they wear a lot of heavy makeup. Yeah. And back then, some of their makeup has some really bad stuff in it, like lead. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Or zinc. That would cause disease, would sink into your pores. So in order to wash that off, they use this kind of a bird-dropping facial to. And it didn't really worked that well because by the end of their lives, Gatia would have some pretty messed up faces. Yeah, a lot of wrinkles. Yeah, it's kind of a

shame. I think it's better now because we have technology. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. People don't put lead directly on there. Exactly. Yes, yeah, it's safe now, yeah. And so, what does it actually do? What is this what makes this bird-dropping facial

work? Does it work? Yeah, so does it work? It does work, and well, a lot of countries have followed suit. and are offering the services today with bird poop facial. So you smell like bird poop, but you look pale. Radiant.

I'm unsure whether or not some of these salons around the world are approved. I don't think there's any there's any like legal licensing for this kind of stuff policing this kind of stuff but nowadays

when they collect the bird droppings, they actually shine ultraviolet light to the poop to kill the bacteria. I'll sanitize it. So there is that level of sanitation. Back then it was lead makeup and

bacteria. Good stuff and the bad stuff. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Clean off the lead with fecal bacteria. There's two major players. There's urea, urea, urea, and guanine. So would bat work as well? Yeah, well, I know people used to, like a lot of different cultures would use Bacuano for a whole bunch of stuff.

But this, it seems like it's just this one bird. There's a dipping sauce or, you know, for mozzarella sticks. The guanine produced like an iridescent effect. And then the urea actually, I mean, it smells bad, but it does a lock in moisture. But the thing is you can actually find these compounds by themselves, and there are some in our everyday products. They're not directly from birds. And something that is more, I would say, current and does not have a root in tradition. Snail facials where you go to a place, they put a bunch of snails on your face, and they crawl on your face.

And secrete slime, and that slime is good for your skin. Where is this? I'd rather have the preparation age. They're popping up everywhere in the world, but it is predominantly in Thailand. But the whole thing is started by Frenchmen. French love their snails. And you can just eat them when you're done. Sure.

Well, these are special snails. These are special snails. The two Frenchmen who pioneered this, they imported 100 of their special snails, and they eat chemical fruit. free organic vegetables. They live a pretty cool life. Free range snails. Free range snails.

And then they climb on your face pretty much. And so the mucus, we've heard a lot. We've talked a lot about snail mucus. There's a lot of weird magical properties in it, right? It produces the purple dye is from snails. This is like a new nightmare. I can feel it like coming. Slowly.

People do use to, even the ancient Greeks used to crush snails for like inflammation on your skin. But this is a different matter. This is actual live snail as climbing on your face. And again... Not on my face, just so we're clear. Just to work clear on somebody's face. And again, like this fluid, the mucus, you can either get it from them sliding across your face or you scare them. You threaten them.

No. You want to scare the snow. You're skittering across your face. Wait, so... Like psychological horror? What does it do? What does it? It has to do something amazing.

People are saying it's really great. You know, tines your skin. And also, this is the other thing. Special snail. Okay, so snail. You know those like pedicures that the fish come and nibble? Yeah, yeah, yeah. They eat the dead skin off.

So technically, they don't have teeth. That's why they're just like kind of suck off the dead skin. Snails technically have teeth. They have 14,000 microscopic teeth. So I think part of that is. foliates as it slides across your face. Okay. And I'm not...

It's got mild abrasive. So this snail is biting your face. Well, it's like, it's like scraping. Yeah, yeah. My only concern is, Dana, I remember you talked about how the little boy brought home a snail from Hawaii, a snail. Oh, yeah, yeah. And then...

Invasive species. It becomes an invasive species. So I think that is the concern right now is like, these snails aren't local. Why are they doing it in Thailand? That's such a specific. Well, I think because Thailand is a place for a lot of spots. a lot of beauty treatments and stuff and it's probably cheaper but yeah I mean the snails will work for cheaper yeah that's the scary thing is what if these snails get loose and screw up the local

ecology so there you go oh wow some fun facials for for people to try adventurous souls to try the snails I can't do I can do the brute poop no problem yeah I would do that one I don't want live animals I know I don't like snails I don't like slugs yeah yeah I'll just be old That's fine. That's okay. I'll age, Greek, to lose.

What you guys don't know is actually it's a giant snail. So it just sits directly on your face, like a face hugger from alien. I'd rather have that. I'd rather have that than multiple snails on my face. I'd rather have one fat snail. Oh, one big snail.

Yeah. Like a job of the hut snail. Yeah. So Lake Merritt in Oakland is kind of near where I live. It's full now of giant sea slugs. Whoa. You can see them. They kind of swam in recently and they've been reproducing.

How big are they? They're like... They look like they would weigh two pounds if you pick it up. It's really big. I didn't pick any up, but they look that big. And they're like everywhere. They're eating the plant, so the lake is getting clear in certain areas. But is that good or bad?

I don't know. So I was reading an article and they said that climate change, so it's warmer now up there. So they've come in and they have like this big boom and bust cycle where they lay hundreds of eggs, thousands of eggs. and then all of a sudden they'll just all die off. So I don't know what that's going to look like when that happens. But they're also called sea hares, like sea rabbit sea hares. Because they're that size? They're big, and their little stalks are really big.

Oh, that's kind of cute. It's intense. But now I have a really clear picture of what a giant snail would look like. Right. Like that with a shell. Like that, with a shell. Yeah. I would not fit it on my face. That's long story short, I wouldn't put it on my face

This is all to say They're really big They're really big Oh my god That's a lot of eggs too They're everywhere We should go on a field trip I'll show you Oh speaking of field trip

Um attention I hope this I don't know when's it going to happen But the corpse flower The giant corpse flower in Berkeley is going to bloom any day now. They're just on a watch for it.

I think there is a live can and you can... Does it smell before, do you think? I think it smells probably intensely when it... How many years between blooming? It's like 50. It varies. It varies, yeah.

It's like, it could be as few as 10. It could be 50 years, yeah. Wow. Right. We're going to smell real bad. So get over there. And smell it. It smells like a dead body. So I decided if the topic was beauty, we had to go back and talk about beauty and the beast. Of course.

Which we've, I'm sure we've mentioned it multiple times over the years. Indeed, indeed. Yeah, you'd be surprised. Two women are actually at the center of the creation of the story that we know is beauty and the beast. I know, right? Wait, you're not talking about the Disney movie. Not talking about the Disney movie. I'm talking about, like, the actual, the classic story.

Where did it come from? Yeah, no. So La Belle and La Bette. I actually have a French video game version of Beauty and the Beast, which is called that. And it turns out that that's very appropriate because the story itself came from France. Gaston. No, but no, no, Gaston came from Les American. Disney, yeah.

So the version that we know the best, which was written as a fairy tale for kids, is by Jean-Marie, the Prince de Beaumont. That is a woman. and she published it in 1756, but she copied it. She copied it from a novella for adults, which was written by Gabrielle Suzanne Barbeau de Villeneuve in 1740. Whoa. Both women. Both women.

Both women. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So, yeah, both women, no pseudonyms. And so, yeah, originally for adults and it's sort of rewritten for kids. But, however, however, the actual original, original. story that very clearly that Beauty and the Beast

was modeled after was like a French version that was you know written was the actual original original story was first published in the year eight Wow

Eight eight eight because this the year this was the approximate approximate publication date of the narrative poem Metamorphoses by the Roman poet Ovid, in the year eight. No.

Pre-order started in the year seven. So any, so one of the many stories that were sort of pulled from, kickstarted, yeah, it was pulled from myth, but Ovid sort of rewrote them. And one of the stories that he kind of first laid down in this book or this, whatever it is you buy in year eight, based on oral mythology, was the tale of Cupid and Psyche. Oh, I love that story. Yeah. So, you know, you go back and look at that story, which I will briefly summarize now. Yes, because I don't know. So there were a king and queen with three beautiful daughters.

And of those daughters, the most lovely and best of all, was the youngest. And her name was Psyche. And she was beautiful and beloved. And the other two were a couple of jerks. Townspeople thought that Psyche was so great that they actually started worshipping her because they thought she was so cool. instead of worshipping Venus, the actual god of love and whatnot, goddess of love. Venus got very mad at this, and so she told her son, Cupid, to go shoot Psyche with one of his love arrows, to make her fall in love with something horrible, like something hideous.

Unfortunately, Cupid in a rare moment of screwing up, accidentally scrapes himself with one of his own arrows, causing himself to fall in love with Psyche. So skipping ahead some stuff, Psyche gets sacrifice to the gods, but ends up not getting sacrificed to God. She ends up in a magnificent house, and she is told by a disembodied voice to enjoy herself and, you know, just have fun in this house. And she's given a lavish banquet. And they're like, oh, be our guest. So she ends up, let's say, in a long-term relationship with Cupid, but she doesn't know who he is, Because he does not want her to, because, of course, you know, people would get mad and find out.

But he does not want her to know who he is. So he only comes into her bedroom at night, and she can never see him. She thinks that he must be a horrible monster because otherwise, why would he be hiding himself? And there had been some stuff about, oh, you know, you're going to end up with this, you know, serpent or whatever it is. Right, right, right. But turns out, no, she busts in on him when he's, like, asleep with, like, a lantern. And it's like, oh, it's actually a super hot dude. and a lot of other stuff happens.

I'm skipping over a lot of torture. But they do end up together, so it's very nice. And so this tale of Cupid and Psyche... That is very beauty and the beast. It is. Her sisters convinced her to find out who it is too. Right. They were like, oh, it's going to be...

Yeah, so that's why. So through the millennia, this sort of, you know, it just gets passed out, it spreads throughout the world, it becomes this archetype of a fairy tale called the animal bridegroom tale. And there's many, many different versions of it. I've heard of the hedgehog one. Yeah.

The seal one. In the grim fairy tales, we have the singing springing lark, which is about a woman who gets married off to a lion. There's one from China. Like, there's one from China. And even the one from China, like, begins with, and there was this rich man, and he had three daughters.

daughters and the youngest was the most beautiful. Yeah. So that's how you can generally recognize these archetype stories because that's kind of how they begin. And the man ends up somehow getting in bad trouble with a beast, a lion, a bear, a dog, you know, whatever it is. And some, because it maybe steals from him or does something bad. And the animal ends up betrothed to the guy's youngest, most innocent daughter. And she goes to live with the monster, but it turns out that he's actually a cool guy. and, you know, somehow she falls in love with him,

and then at the end of this revealed that he was an enchanted prince. Just so many variations on this super, super old. I did not realize it was that old of an archetype. Yeah, yeah. But, you know, if you think about what the story is kind of saying, it's like this is something that young girls have faced throughout the centuries of, like, being married off to somebody who's very young, and they would perceive that person to be a horrible monster.

and it's kind of telling it's telling you girls for better or for worse like oh but but if you love him you know that's how you tame the beast right like that's how you kind of like you know make him a cool guy again so in Beauty and the Beast by Beaumont

which is the one that really is where we get Beauty and the Beast from the one that was for kids yeah merchant three sons and three daughters had some sons in there the youngest daughter's name is Belle and that's specifically called out as being that's not her actual name It's just that she was so beautiful.

They all called her that. Which means beauty in French. Right. She likes books. Like, this is not something made up for Disney. Like, this was from the original 1700. She likes books. She doesn't want to get married.

It was a woman wrote a book for a bunch of women. Yeah, it's like, she's a little mouse. She likes books. She loves reading. You know, she reminds me of somebody. Right, right, right. Yeah, yeah. Writing and stuff.

Yeah. so very much like in the movie dad finds the castle one day goes in you know he eats the food that's inside and he takes a rose because she was just like oh dad just bring me back a rose so he brings her back this rose and of course you know the beast beast says you're a thief you know but you can send your daughter in your place to be imprisoned instead of you here in the castle. So he does, and she's treated very well and, you know, all the books you want to read, whatever, and they fall in love. Dad, she has the magic mirror.

The magic mirror is in the, in the 1700s, yeah, right. She sees that her dad is sick. She asks to leave. She leaves, and of course, she's dressed in, you know, finery now, and she's having a really good life. And her sisters, they kind of figure out, like, Oh, we got to break the two of them up because she doesn't deserve to be this happy and rich

and maybe one of us can get in there somehow. So they basically convince her to stay longer in the hopes of like ruining what's going on with her and the Beast. She agrees, but then, you know, she stays for a week longer, but that she finally looks in the mirror and the Beast is there dying of heartache. And so she rushes back and she's like, I love you.

Turns out he was a prince under a spell. And of course, as always, I want to end on this. There is a punishment for the villains in the original story and a moral. The sisters? Yeah, like any good fairy tale. Yeah, the evil sisters who tried to conspire to.

And these are the villains. These are usually gruesome punishments. There is no, there is no gaston, there is no suitor, but the sisters are the villains. What happens to them? So the fairy, the fairy that originally enchanted the beast in the first place, who is now like, okay, well, the beast has now gotten over his

thing, you know? It's not a... She's not a jerk anymore, right, yeah. She says to the sisters, As to you, ladies, I know your hearts and all the malice they contain. Become two statues. But under this transformation, still retain your reason.

You shall stand before your sister's palace gate and be at your punishment to behold her happiness. And it will not be in your power to return to your former state until you own your faults. But I am very much afraid that you will always remain statues. Pride, anger, gluttony, and idleness are sometimes conquered. But the conversion of a malicious and envious mind is a kind of miracle.

Wow. Dark. That is dark. Go ahead, kids. So basically they're just statues witnessing. She's like, until you own this, until you own this, until you. you realize that what you did was wrong, you will be statues and you will transform back to humans once you realize what you did was wrong. But I bet you're not going to envy that

their sister can walk around. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's like a twilight zone ending. All right, let's take a quick break. A word from our sponsor. This is Jen and Jenny from ancient history fan girl and we're here to tell you about Jenny's scorching historical romantasy based on Alarick of the Bissigoths, enemy of my dreams. Amanda Boucher, best-selling author of the Kingmaker Chronicle, says, quote, this book has everything, high stakes action, grit, ferocity, and blazing passion. Julia and Alaric are colliding storms against a backdrop of the brutal dangers of ancient Rome. They'll do anything to carve their peace out of this treacherous world and not just survive, but rule. Enemy of my dreams is available wherever books are sold.

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This week we're talking about things that are beautiful or beauty to be beautiful. So I have a segment for this. So recently, and within the last year, I heard about this, measure this unit of measurement of beauty like the Helen the Helen is named for Helen of Troy the most beautiful woman in Greece or in the world at that time and they said she was capable of launching a thousand ships and that was the Trojan War like they came for her and they sent a thousand ships and so a Mila Helen is beautiful enough to launch one ship oh my god that is so good that's great that's funny

so what is I don't think there's any way to tongue in cheek yeah yeah yeah it's joke but it's there's funny so they're like oh okay Helen launched a thousand ships and they also burnt down that town so there's all these equivalencies for like what

how does it convert so like for instance like a a nano Helen this writer said was send an old man on a canoe trip and build a good roaring blaze in the fireplace. Beautiful enough to do that. Or a, okay, so

or a gigahelen, which has launched the equivalent of one trillion Greek warships and destroy the solar system with your beauty. I like how it's two parts. Amount of ships launched and how much burning is possible. It's from a work

from 1592. The line was, was this the face that launched a thousand ships and burnt the topless towers of Iliam? And so that's why there's really two parts to it about launching a bunch of ships. I like that. And then burning something down. Like, that's how beautiful.

I don't want to say it's fake science. It's, I know, I like, I like the kind of like fantasy science. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. One Helen. So, of course, Helen is one Helen unit of beauty. Yes, she has one Helen unit. Yes, actually, so more than a thousand ships launched, like at that point. So she is actually, what was it?

They did the math, and it was like 1.2, 3. It's like a kilobite, right? There's slightly more than 1,000 bytes in a kilobite. So she's slightly more than one helen. I like the old man in the canoe. Yeah. Somebody was like a pico, Helen, is barbecue a couple of steaks, and then toss an inner tube in the pool. That's the length you'd go to.

Maybe it has to do with, like, power. Like, how much power does your beauty lend you? So, like, if you are controlling someone else with your beauty, get into jewels, money, and lots. Yeah. Then we get power. Jewels and jewels. Both kind of, yeah.

And we have one last segment. Colin, you got pads out. I got the pads, paper out, and pens. We're going to close to... Sons out, guns out, pads. I'm going to close with a, like, a mini, beauty-themed version of a quiz I've done before called Person, Place, or Thing. Okay.

So I will tell you a thing, process, procedure object. You tell me, is it named after a person, named after a place, named after a thing. Oh, this stuff. Yeah. So this is beauty themes. So these are, this is all sort of around the idea of like going to a spa, kind of the wellness theme. Okay. Because, you know, relax your body.

You're more beautiful outside. So let's start with the word spa itself. The word spa. What? S-P-A. Is spa, you know, health spa, any kind of spa, is a spa named after a person, a place, or a thing? That's a great question. That is.

I feel like I've heard this before, but I don't remember. Okay. All right, answers up. Karen says place, Chris says place, Dana says place. You guys are correct. The town of Spa, Belgium. Wow. Yeah.

Belgium or not Belgium. And yes, the town of Spa, Belgium, known as far back as the 1300s for their healing, healing mineral, cold springs, cold springs, but healing, said to be healing mineral water, tree springs. That's what I was hoping was the expectation. Yep, famous, as I say, since the 14th century. Yeah. Since Roman times, people would make visits here for the healing properties. And yeah, the name, of course, is just directly trickle down from there. We go to the spa. We have our own spa. We don't need you, Belgium.

Let's go to the spa. While you're at the spa, you may indulge yourself in a nice invigorating dip in a jacuzzi. Is the jacuzzi? The jacuzzi, the whirling hot tub, if you will. Is it named after a person, a place, or a thing? This is a rumor. I don't know if it's true. Let's see. Answers up.

Dana says person. Chris says person Karen says person You guys are all correct You guys are all two for two Candido Enzo Jakuzy What a awesome name

Yes he was an immigrant To America I heard the rumor that he went to Cal He went to Berkeley That's the rumor That's why I know he was in front I don't know if it's true I guess we'll never know

I wonder if that family name still exists I've never met a jacuzzi before a person Well there's the winery here in Jukuzzi and Napa Oh really? Yeah. Maybe that's where they went. Maybe.

Made a lot of money. Let's all look it up. I wonder if it's the same family. I don't know. I have the bed. Like the guillotine. Right. Right.

The cacuzzi family did settle in Berkeley, California. Yes. Yes. He was born in Italy. It was not a rumor. Where's jacuzzi stadium then? Yeah, I know. It's just a big hot tub.

They say that he invented the whirlpool bath that bears his name. Partly for treatment for his son, his young son at the time, who had rheumatoid arthritis. Oh. That's nice. Yes. While you are in the process of bathing and washing and spying and jacuzing, you might use a lufa to exfoliate and scrub off that dead skin. I'm sure you have all seen these. Is the lufa named after a person, a place, or a thing? I think I know what it is.

answers up and you guys are all three for three you all say thing it is a thing the gourd the lufa commonly spelled L-O-O-O-F-A-H

is named directly after the Lufa plant L-U-F-F-A the luffa the luffa it is a member of the cucumber family more broadly the family that has zucchini and gourds and pumpkins

and when it's younger you can eat it it's an edible plant but if you let it grow and dry out all the skin and the flesh all falls away and you've just got sort of that fiber husk left yeah and then you can even see in like the actual real dried lufa that you can see

the seed chamber yeah like a cucumber I was reading about the process for creating them as yeah the very last step they have to do is shake out all the dried seeds once the thing is done because they kind of knocking around in there all right last one last one little bit of a twist here

this is just an answer you'll give me Okay. The word sauna Is the only everyday common English word to come from this language. The word sauna is the only everyday common English word to come from this language. Yes. What country is the home of the sauna? Wow.

In Chinese we call it San Juan. But I mean, but that's phonetic. it's an old word they're still quite popular there in their home country and where do you guys think sanas are from

think Scandinavian I think so too I like the way you guys are thinking I like the way you guys are thinking or is it oh you know what I'm just gonna who cares go for broke Karen I love it

answers up Karen with the correct answer says finish Chris for the record also has the correct answer Dana said Sweden You guys are all in the right region Yeah, Finland

Finland is the home of the sauna or sauna If you prefer According to the BBC 99% of Finns Take at least one sauna a week Wow It is extremely common there Many if not most homes

Will have a sauna room in the home Yeah It's 99% Yeah All right well good job guys I feel I've feel re-invigorated already. Place person thing, Finland.

You are all more beautiful. Thank you, Colin. That's the official name of your quiz. Plac person, thing, or Finland. Now I have to work at a Finland question every time. Yeah, that would be awesome. I want to know more about Finland. All right.

And that is our show about beauty. Thank you guys for joining me. Thank you guys, listeners, for listening. Hope you learned a lot of stuff about bird poop, beauty and the beast. a pico helen and also things that you can use in your house for beauty regimen but don't try everything

you can find us on iTunes on Stitcher on SoundCloud on Spotify mobile and on our website good jobbrain.com and we'll see you guys next week see it. Bye. If you like this podcast, can we recommend another one?

It's called Big Picture Science. You can hear it wherever you get your podcast, and its name tells part of the story. The big picture questions and the most interesting research in science. Seth and I are the host. Seth is a scientist. I am Molly, and I'm a science journalist. And we talk to people smarter than us, and we have fun along the way. The show is called Big Picture Science.

And as Seth said, you can hear it wherever you get your podcast.