Grass Daddies Podcast - Episode 69: Nice.

Episode Date: February 5, 2025

Happy 69th episode of the Grass Daddies Podcast! Jake is joined by his fellow highschool rejects Trace and Ben. We get a sneak peak at some of the upcoming answers for the next rambling feud as Trace completes his survey live. The group discusses an interesting question that came across Jake's' Tik Tok feed and per usual Jake asks his guests trivia questions steming from their particular areas of expertise. SHANKITGOLF.COM Code:grass Follow us on Social Media! Youtube: grassdaddiespodcast Instagram: @grassdaddiespodcast @kamdenwellmann @jakekillham Spencer's Instagram: @spence2018 Tik Tok: @kandenwellmann (yes that's how it's spelled) @jakekillham11

Welcome to the I'm drowning in corn podcast and today I'm being joined by my two counterparts from from whence we came a long time ago in a land where these uniforms were worn. We didn't have uniforms, but Trace and Ben, welcome back to the pod for your fourth or fifth? I don't know how many times you've... Fourth or fifth. Something like that. This is like your third solo? Maybe second solo.

Maybe third solo. I think I did three solo, one with Ben. So this is five. I think this is five. And we did a two-parter, didn't we? Did we do a double episode? It's neither here nor there. Didn't we do a double episode? Because the one episode we were talking about when you were at

Ryan's, that was like the second one that we did. Possibly. Yeah. Could have been a double dip there. And you also... I did the Halloween. You did the Halloween movies. And we did pre-Vegas with Ben. I think that might have been the other part of that part.

We've done pre-Vegas, post-Vegas, and a second post-Vegas. They'll get you with those timeshares. They will indeed. So you listened to that episode? Yeah. When he was like, they came up to me right away, and they're like, so we got all this free stuff. I was like, oh, they're going to try to get him in a timeshare and see how this goes. They in fact did.

Oh, that was so funny. Anyways, were you on any other ones besides the halloween and with trace we haven't just done no we've done one just us two together because the very first time you came on you were like i've got a bone to pick with grass but that sounds wonderful should i mute your mic till you get it you almost got it perfect um yeah i remember you were on once and you said you had a bone to pick with grass but i do remember that now you remember that were we alone for that yeah it was just us two and i was like holy shit i've never seen ben talk this much i'm just kidding how's that going over there

maybe we should have got it to your liking before we started recording but here we are i typically like putting them like up and then letting gravity because if you try to bend them up then gravity just pulls their ass maybe i will mute your mic oh wait that's that's mine there we go it's still good yeah you can't talk right now because we can't hear you but i don't know how much it will affect the clanging and banging, but, uh, which was a band we were thinking about starting in high school. Don't you? Yeah.

Don't you remember? Cause, cause I don't remember that. Turn me on, turn me up. Cause neither one of us knew how to play an instrument, but we're like, we'll just take some steel trash cans. And we stole some rulers. Just kidding. kidding we didn't steal it's not right to

steal it was like blue man group on crack yeah or i have no memory of this but i'm sure it happened just go along with the fucking joke yeah and then we were like there we go. Because remember, our first gig was at... The Bourbon. Sandy's. The Bourbon. The Bourbon was your first gig. Wow. We were 16.

We were flying high. Yeah, we were 16. We were in the Bourbon, just Trace and I and two steel trash cans, just clanging. And banging. There we go. I think I saw you guys one time at the queue. Yeah. Until they politely asked us to leave.

Yeah. The way we got in was they thought we were just trying to clean up the trash. And then we just went up to the stage and just started playing. And they were like, you know what? They actually do sound kind of good. Oh, good. The cleaning crew is here. And instead of a guitar, we had that guy that sits out there with the washboard.

Yup. And he was our main instrumentalist. He was going ham. We were percussion, and he was our main instrumentalist. Who was your vocalist? We were an acapella. We were not acapella, just music. Just strictly instrumental.

Instrumental. I just saw a meme, and it was these two guys started a metal band and their vocals were sung by their parrot and the band's name was hate beak it was like a metal band i like that and you could just hear like the metal and then it's just you hear like just like so who's your favorite ai artist my favorite ai artist i can't say i have one i don't know what that is but i mean i know what it is but i've never heard it but what i can say is i've definitely gained weight since the last time i've worn this jacket and it's cutting off the circulation in my big fat fucking neck. You have to wear it like that. There you go.

I actually might. It's not too hot right now, but I might. I might pop a few buttons later on, depending on... The fireball. Depending on what? I mean... Let's open up the Magic mini fridge i mean trace i love your improvving skills they're they're just so good they're so good okay let's open up this mini fridge and see what we got here i hope it's i mean it could be anything maybe it will be fireball

since you kind of spoke it into yes tuition you have to give it the old rub down rub it down popped it open pop it what do we got wow wow there's nothing in there i can't see there's nothing in there people always try to pull that trick on me there's nothing in there and i can see partially through the crack right here so i can see that there is something in there well there's a couple things there's a couple things see gave us some options it's just dr pepper it's just dr pepper with a little glass yeah make that two two glasses only two of those there's only two glasses actually. Make that two. What? These mics pick up a lot and you can hear every little...

I was right! Hey, no fucking way. Now he's clanging and banging. I apologize. Do we got any ice in there? Let me check. Any ice in there?

Room temperature? Do we have any room temperature ice in there? I don't like it to be too cold. I don't like it cold. Oh, yeah. The Magic Mini Fridge does not have... Does not provide... Doesn't have an ice maker, but we all know that ice is ice ice is nice um

and i would like i'm gonna finger yeah i think i think you go ice first yeah right that's just i mean if you don't you're kind of insane right to pour and if you could throw that down in that glass a little bit louder so the mic picked it up that'd be great but um thank you that actually sounds kind of nice i'm not gonna lie oh i got a little now what are you guys when it comes to icers are you three cubes are you four cubes how many cubes do you put in are you a four cube guy three cube guy there are other options besides that but that's just what i'm saying and i'll let you answer now oh me first oh while i'm putting the ice okay i'll go first yeah if i'm getting if the beverage is already cold it's half of the volume in ice if the beverage is already okay if the beverage is already cold. Okay. If the beverage is not already cold, full ice.

Full ice. Full ice. I'm always a straight down the middle three ice cube guy. I think that's the perfect number. Two is not enough. One is like, what? Four, if I want it to be a little bit colder, and that's what I'm doing. So I'm going four because I want to be extra cold and i'm gonna have a go ahead and have you not pour my alcohol because you're not a nice person

and i know that you'll fuck me over pouring way too much oh brother tell me if i asked you to pour it you wouldn't have poured i would have given you two shots of vodka. You stole my joke I was about to make. Two shots of Fireball? When it's glugging like that. That's the right amount, don't you think? That's pretty heavy. That's kind of heavy, but. You might have to drink that and then do the right amount.

I might have to drink that because I won't have room for the Dr. Pepper. Yes. So, you did not complete my survey that I sent you. You are the weakest link. Nah, shit. But that's okay because I'm going to give you the opportunity to do it right now, live, on the podcast. Did you send it to my right? How does that sound? Did you email it to me or text me?

Well, I sent it from my phone. I don't have it from my phone number anymore remember i texted it to you i just have an ipod touch i have snapchat in my email i'll find it so for those of you that don't know itunes he's logging onto his hotmail so for those of you that are unaware a couple episodes ago we spencer ben and i came up different ben came up with um new questions for a later rambling feud episode which was not that old which is an episode that we did not that long ago and we came up with our own questions for the upcoming episodes that really aren't that crazy funny it was just stuff we kind of came up with spur of the moment but it'll be fun and creative because it was ours and we made it so what i did was i sent out all those questions to a bunch of people like you would do with a real survey and asked

them to answer trace being one of those people who apparently didn't get those messages. When did you send this? I sent it. It's like Wednesday. Yesterday. Yesterday? It would have been Wednesday. I see an Instagram video.

Hold on. Wait, my most recent text from you was on Sunday. So maybe I didn't text you that's probably why i sworn i did well you still get to answer it live guess what you get to answer it right now to give you guys a taste of what the episode will be like does that sound fun yeah great so question one how many beers slash alcoholic beverages do you drink in a month you can answer funny serious truthfully you can lie and say none i don't drink alcohol um let's let's go with 60 that that seems like a that's a fair safe number and i like it i don't know an average an average of two a day some days probably none some days probably right six or ten um question two how many times do you wipe before it's clean i just keep wiping until it

until it's clean until it's clean how many how did i say that wrong no you got it how many times do you wipe until it's clean so on average give us how many times it takes you like oh apparently this question was confusing a couple people because i was like what do you mean are you asking me if i leave my butthole dirty no that's what i thought you meant by the question wait hold on okay answers how many beers you have bang how many wipes well many wipes that's how many times do you wipe before it's clean? I think four times. Four times. See?

There we go. Perfect. But you thought I was asking you, do you ever just give up and leave your ass dirty? Right. I was like, what is he trying to say here? Sometimes you're so close to a shower. It's like three o'clock, shower's at seven. Do I even bother? Do you not want to know what Cam said?

He said six to eight, sometimes straight to the shower. And I don't know if he was joking or not. That might be a spoiler, but I had to tell you guys. Okay. Word you use to make your significant other think that you're listening. Sorry, repeat that. That was the word. Oh, is that it no so when your girlfriend's just sitting over there yapping away uh-huh and you're not really listening to her what like word do you like blurt out to like make her think that you're still listening just so she doesn't go are

you even listening i say right okay i like that right now now alissa can't watch this episode probably not watch it anyways but next question name an item that you have in your nightstand if you don't have a nightstand i don't have a nightstand pretend you had a nightstand well what's an item you would have in on it something you have next to your bed yeah what's next to your bed probably batteries there probably batteries in there just got some nine volts some double a not gonna specify what the batteries go to but there are some batteries. I've got some button batteries laying around somewhere down there.

I've got some hearing aid batteries. I've got some batteries for my hearing aid. Hey, did you move my D batteries again? Name something you wouldn't want to walk in on well my my initial response is that uh family feud like one of the most famous ones where he goes naked grandma but i feel like that was that was that literally one of the questions on that show i think it was grandma it was like what wouldn't you want to see when you walked in your room it was was something like that. And he goes, naked grandma. Yeah. But probably parents having sex would probably be the. It's a pretty common answer.

Yeah. Yep. It's so common that it was recommending the rest of the sentence for me before I even. Well, are you in Google Sheets? Yeah. It takes two times. What's the first thing you say when you get in a car accident oh shit why is it so much funnier here to get live oh yeah i wonder if they're all funnier here in it live um name something you would hide from your significant other

his batteries what the batteries go to probably food food snacks food snacks naked grandma naked grandma batteries batteries last one name someone you wouldn't want to get a call from the battery factory they're out of batteries they're out they need they need to borrow mine probably boss boss. Boss. Because if I'm not at work and my boss calls me, that probably means... That you either have to go into work or... Or I fucked up something at work. You fucked up something at work. Yeah.

He's like, yeah. Instantly, he's like, oh, I did actually have work today. Whoops. What's, like, the latest you've ever, like, been to been to work like what's the latest whoopsie like i overslept or right like i didn't like text in advance hey i'm gonna be late yeah like okay um because i have a feeling just a sneaking feeling that you might have a doozy of a story for us while you think about that i literally i took the toilet paper i had toilet paper out here like five episodes ago because i had a runny nose oh and i just took

it out and now my nose is starting to run again it's a fireball it's a fireball it's so spicy it's making my nose like i got some old ones out here I can honestly say it probably wasn't anything too ridiculous like there's probably been a time cause usually especially at my current job like they'll call you right away like at scheduled time they'll be like

hey where you at and then I'm a light sleeper so I probably would have woken up and been there in two minutes you didn't wake up when I nevermind oh so I probably would have woken up and been there in two minutes. You didn't wake up when I, never mind. Oh. Oh! I was going to say when I did push-ups on you,

but you were definitely awake when that happened. I was like, what is going on? He didn't put up too much of a fight. But that's, so we got that. I got some more answers I got to type in there. One of my, someone was just like, is this going to be anonymous? And I was like, yeah. Well, now not so much for me.

One of my friends put a racial slur for one of their answers. And I'm like, that is not going on there right I'm not gonna name names but just know that I have some shitty friends just kidding I love all my friends for the most part you know who you are was pretty good eh as you're grimacing I I thought about it. Thought about what? Adding more Fireball? No. Oh.

The comments. Oh. Oh, you thought about that? Yeah. I was like, I need to give him some usable content. Yeah, you're just like, do I tell the truth,

or do I kind of keep it a little PG? I would just go on the funny side. Lie and be funny. When I get in a car accident, I'll just keep it pg with fuck um yeah maybe a couple fucks man you guys are really chatty tonight yep well well it was fun guys thank you guys for watching i don't even know how long we've been going for 20 21 minutes 21 minutes 21 21 you guys are great podcasters i was gonna say you're acting like you want to say see what happens and i feel like um sometimes i'm just

like i talk so fucking much and then i'm like but then i remember that if i don't fill the space and i just stop talking then some of my friends will be like do you want me to do mine live what give me that look do you want me to do mine on this live i got your answers already i know but and i entered them in he's he's wondering if you want him to read them off what he answered you absolutely can i mean i've already seen them i haven't i haven't seen them are you gonna watch the episode yeah probably you just let me know which one it is yeah no the episode where we reveal the answers are you gonna i don't care are you gonna no okay if anything it's given a little sneak peek and maybe as you guys are playing along at home, because it's going to be such a fun experience, you'll have a little bit of an idea of what answers might be up there. So, yeah, go ahead.

No, I'm good. Leave it. You want to leave it? Leave it. Okay. Okay. it okay okay um i did have a couple things i did want to talk about that i jotted down in my notes oh so this might be kind of funny well i hope it is because that's that's usually not a great way to set up a conversation this might be funny this might be funny what i meant by that is

i had this jotted down that i was going to tell to like ben and spencer because it applies a little bit more to them but you guys will probably find some humor in this too so i was at the turf conference and there was these guys uh there was a seminar about steel do you know steel brand like weed eaters and yeah yeah there was a seminar about steel switching over to battery as everyone is doing there's a lot of you know people are trying to go electric in everything and it was a whole seminar about just like the benefits of it and stuff and the thing about the turf conferences there's certain seminars that are like this is primarily for the golf course side of things and this is like for um this one is for just like lawn care guys or

like sports turf or whatever right but this one was like a general like a lot all over here and there's these guys a couple rows in front of us and you could tell they were real just like i'm like i've been using a gas weed eater my whole life and there ain't nothing you can do to make me switch over no stupid pussy ass battery power like you could tell they were like that mentality and so like basically everything the guy said about the battery like what was cool about it or like what was revolutionary about it you could see the guy turn to his buddy and be like yeah like talking to him like that's fucking stupid at one point he raised his hand and he goes yeah because he was talking about how much money you would save it was like the upfront cost for the batteries is more but over time you're

saving on gas and the guy goes what about how much it costs electrically to charge the batteries and the guy giving the seminar was like to charge this fully it costs about 13 cents and the guy didn't say anything the rest of the time it was so funny how he just like it's like he's like they haven't thought about this have they and then they're like it costs you like 11 cents it costs you 13 cents to fully charge this battery right oh i i remember that actually reminds me i remember an eighth grade wood shop with mr raver yeah yeah i remember he was he was telling us about like electricity and like oh if your mom ever complains that you left your light on all night just reminder it costs more for her to use her hair dryer than for you to leave your light on all night and i was like oh no yes you put two

seconds on that microwave and it's more power than leaving your light on right month right like i've had my ceiling fan on for like that's three years yeah the straight three years straight it's probably harmful to turn it off at this point yeah because it might not come back on yeah that might be it uh but um one of the facts the guy said was a gas powered leaf blower puts out more CO2 in one hour of use than a modern F-150 driving from Omaha to New York. Really? Now, either... That might be because it's an oil mix.

Right, it is mixed. So it's denser in co2 also i don't know if that's a testament to how far along we've come in modern vehicles where we've been limiting emissions or if he's like they were driving it on e88 or if like running a leaf blower full bore really does put out more. I don't know. I don't know. Sometimes they say stuff that they're like, yep, research shows. Yeah, I don't know. Or maybe he was trying to pull a fast one on him and be like, yeah, you personally using that weed mower for an hour is personally going to give you more co2 fumes than if you drove inside your truck

from omaha to new york i think it might like put out into the ozone but i mean if you did mean that maybe i could see someone trying to pull a fast one or maybe he was just straight up lying yeah yep because nobody can test that he's like nobody's gonna ever look this up you can find no one's driving from here to all from you can find either side of any argument online and be like see it shows this and then you could look up this exact opposite thing see look at that study and then it's like but you gotta love the internet just, and then the whole rest of the seminar, like anytime the guy gave a fact or talked about how cool something was, he was like, just like looking at his buddy saying, God knows what, but yeah, we'll, we'll live in a time where like, you'll go to the store

to buy a lawnmower and all you can get is battery lawnmowers. Right. You'll go to the store to get whatever and it's a lithium ion battery. Right. We'll be alive when that's a thing. Snowblowers. What are we going to do with all these gas powered cars once they put batteries in everything? Are we just going to melt them all down into scrap?

Well, they still exist, but you won't be able to buy new gas cars. Because I thought, at one point, I thought I heard they were trying to make gas-powered vehicles illegal, like, altogether at some point. That was California. Oh, just California. They're not. Just because their emissions are so bad over there.

I was going to say. Just because. Or just because it's California. Just because it's california because it's california okay um yeah on a slightly dumber topic something came up across my desk the other day and by a desk i mean tiktok i saw a tiktok of a meme that really got the old noodle cranking away. You know, got me thinking. Probably shouldn't have phrased it like that.

Yeah, because I was thinking of a dry noodle. Cranking a dry noodle? You don't want to crank a dry noodle. There's one thing about dry noodles that you don't want to do with them. Crank them. Crank them on. Crank on them. So, but this actually turned into a fun

lunch discussion and the premise is you're in a room with 1 000 randomly selected people okay and for your survival you have to beat all 1 000 of those people at something, what would it be? Now, we started probably getting a little too in-depth with this because we were like, well, if it's 1,000 randomly selected people, about 300 of them are going to be Indian, 300 of them are going to be Chinese. Because you think about the world's population, statistically, percentage average right so i was like i could probably just say being six six yeah height but it's gonna get you pretty far it's gonna say are they just grabbing these people from the u.s or just out of the whole world? I would say the entire Earth's population, you randomly select 1,000.

So you put everyone in the world in a random generator and you pick 1,000. I got mine. What would it be? So I can make you laugh, but you wouldn't be able to make me laugh. So once you laugh, you're out. If I laugh, I'm out.

I could beat 1,000 people at that pretty easily. So 1,000 people couldn't once you laugh you're out if i laugh i'm out i could beat a thousand people at that pretty easily so one thousand people couldn't make you laugh but you could make one thousand people laugh oh yeah oh yeah you don't think one of those people wouldn't laugh would stone face you i'd just stone face them back they would crack like you could go on for days and i know but you have to make them laugh i know but i can keep trying and then it's like okay you know and trade off and then they can't make me laugh trade back but what if what if you accidentally make yourself laugh does that count if i'm trying to make you laugh i can laugh oh but once you unless i say something then you can't laugh at what I said. Okay. All right Trace I need you to dig deep here. Okay as I unfurl this jacket cuz I'm getting a little warm

He's trying to seduce. I need you to make Ben laugh right now, and I need you to know Okay, I think I can't I don't know. He's so dead inside. He might be able to stone face anything you say I don't think I don't think I have anything I could say that is just Oh no, he's so dead inside. He might be able to stone face anything you say. He's locked in so far. I don't think I have anything I could say that is just spontaneously funny. I'm drowning in corn. Oh, I saw his... I saw his...

That was a good reverb on that. That was a good one. I saw his little lip... I saw his little lip quiver a little bit. What do you think about when you're trying to stone face it? Naked grandma. Come on. I'm going to title this episode Naked Grandma.

Mostly just how, like, it's, I laugh in my brain because when people try to tell you a bad joke, they think they're so funny. So then I'm laughing in my head at how funny they think they are. But then I just give them nothing. I had to quit drinking Jack and Cokes because I was drinking way too much Coke. I saw him want to. I saw his little... Are we still going? Oh, come on.

That counts. You're out for the rest of the house also also when you said the whole world my odds are immensely greater facing the world in the humor kind of thing right because a lot of them probably don't speak english yeah because trace could pull out his phone and just hit me with a bass-boosted meme, you know? And might get a chuckle out of you. Might get me. You know, like, very random videos, like, they'll make me. But if a foreign person just tried talking to you and you're like, I don't even know what they're saying.

Yeah, tell me a joke. And then they're like, ooh, ah. I mean, you yourself are pretty funny. I might have to edit that out. We'll leave it in'll leave it in my eyes just grew so high i was like just saying like dancing around like they wouldn't know like like monkeys give me a joke right now give me a joke give me give you a joke yep okay so four girls are trying to get into heaven. No, that's too long of a joke. I'm not a joke guy. See, that's the thing is you sit there and I can start hitting you with jokes. So a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead

rob a bank and they're running from the cops and they find a potato farm and they go into the barn at the potato farm see i was thinking about not laughing and it made me laugh they go into the potato farm and they hide behind potato barrels and the police kicked the first bucket which the redhead is hiding in and they're like come out we know you're in there. And the redhead goes, meow. And they're like, oh, it's just a cat. And they kick the next bucket, and it's a brunette. And the brunette goes, woof, woof. And they're like, oh, it's just a dog.

And they go to the third barrel, which has a blonde in it, and they kick the barrel. And the blonde goes, potato. I'm a potato. I'm a chicken nugget. So four girls are trying to get into heaven the first girl goes up and peter says is there anything that you need to tell me that you did before you go into heaven and she goes you know what i was um i was looking at some pretty inappropriate things back on earth.

And he said, I understand. Wash your eyes in this holy water and you can go into heaven. So she washed her eyes in the holy water, went into heaven. The second girl goes up and she goes, I listened to some pretty inappropriate music. And yeah. And he he said that's okay wash your ears in this holy water and you can go into heaven now as this was happening the fourth girl jumped ahead of the third girl in line and peter was like whoa whoa whoa whoa what are you what are you doing and she goes there is no way i'm washing my mouth in that water after she washes her ass in it. Oh, I forgot you're trying to do the stone face thing.

I'm just saying you could tell me a million jokes. Just hit, rattle them off. And I've heard that one. And that's why you're such a fun guy to hang out with. I'm just, I'm proving my point. You wanted me to prove my point. Okay. Unrelated.

Can I get a Ripski? There's no way I'm putting my mouth on that rip before you. Trace is like, speaking of mouth. After you boofed it. Trace. Thank you. That's a hell of a tug. What is one thing that you think you could beat a thousand randomly

selected people at a thousand random people i feel like there's a pretty obvious answer to this i mean i want to say video games right but like you said if we're taking a whole bunch of randomly selected people out of a thousand people there's no way. When it comes to what's your best game? Probably FIFA. I bet you could beat

1,000 randomly selected people at FIFA. I bet you could beat 1,000 randomly selected people at FIFA. I bet you could. Maybe. Well, some of them are probably infants. If it's 1,000 randomly selected, I wonder how many times I'm going to say 1,000 randomly selected. But like, okay, so here's a sidebar. Naked grandma.

Naked grandma? There might be a naked grandma. If I lose, I die? You die. So you've got to be 100 sure you will beat them at this so like what if i just said eating shit eating literal shit like how many people do you think would just keep eating shit probably a couple out of a thousand with their their life on the line? Like, because what I'm thinking is I just got to eat more than the second place guy. Right, the old eating the most shit.

I don't have to outrun the bear. I just have to outrun that guy. I just got to outrun that guy. I think. Because I don't want to eat shit, but I don't. Kind of sounds like you do. But I think a thousand other people also don't want to eat shit. But they don't want to eat shit more than you?

I don't know. I'm just saying. Are you more of a liquid shit eater or a solid shit eater? Oh, my God. I don't know, man. What about just out drinking them? What if I get an Irishman, though? Yeah.

It's only going to take one good drinker then i'm just gonna die of alcohol poisoning at that point see i would get i'd get cooked because i'd get like shane gillis or somebody who's right literally like very quick and just hit you as well you can't assume out of a thousand out of a thousand randomly selecting me my luck that you would get a famous comedian my luck when your thing is final boss is shane gillis and i'm just like okay is he like your favorite comedian just laugh at everything he said he just knows he drinks a lot i i know that oh shane gillis both of you yeah shane Shane Gillis would be able to hit me with something. It'd be like me for the average drinker if we did a beer for beer.

I just have to drink the same amount of beers as they do and then just drink one more. And I technically win. I don't have to get drunk. I just got to win. Well, and by that logic, I probably get like some nba player but what are the odds yeah now that is just like a physical trait right now in terms of skills do you think there's anything for you like weld something a thousand selected I could hook up a VFD probably faster than anybody. That's what I'm thinking.

You have certain trade skills that not a lot of... I could frame you up an A1 really fast. Or a C3. Sure. Just building a house. But again, you throw Americans in there, probably get alignment in there. I think we calculated there would be about 300 of the 1,000 would be American.

Yeah, probably. So there'd be probably at least 25 healthcare workers kill them. He would kill them. Oh. He would kill them at building. He wouldn't actually. Well, I don't know. Ten teachers kill them. Shop teacher, though. Imagine.

Imagine, like. How many shops? You're at 999, and then just out of the smoke, John Rayburn just comes striding out. I know, but it's like, okay, build this C3. And you'd be like, what the fuck did you just say to me? Wire up this VFD, and it's just like a rat's nest of cable aid.

You're just like, what am I even looking at? I don't even know what you're talking about, so you've already beat me. Yeah. I'd be dead. Managing a jet splash? People could do that better than me.

What? Come on. You gotta give yourself more credit. Coloring inside the lines for an entire coloring book? You're kind of shaky. Yeah, I get shaky. My hands get kind of sweaty.

It's like the cookie squid game. Oh, shit. Oops. Are we just making squid game? Essentially. No. No, we're not. If beast games can exist, you can't make your own Squid Games and be like, are we making

Squid Games? No, I'm not worried about a copyright thing. I'm just saying, are we? Anyways. I would be really bad at trivia because I'm so confident that the first answer in my brain is the right one. And then somebody could say my answer and be wrong and i'd be like potato do you want me to make that is still wrong do you want me to

hit you with some trivia i told you i'd be bad but yeah let it rip i told you i wouldn't be very good at it but yeah go ahead and do what i said i would push me down yeah what what kind of trivia do you think you would excel at and what kind of trivia do you think you would excel at? And what kind of trivia do you think you would excel at? Geography. Geography? Mm-hmm. Okay.

Got a 61 in geography. And you're confident in that? And that's your strong suit. Mm-hmm. Good point. 61 out of 65? It's got to be multiple guests 155 geography questions that might stump you or maybe we don't choose the ones that are potentially hard i don't know if it'll be more it's not gonna be multiple choice like if you're played trivial pursuit oh yeah oh yeah i'm

like i played with trays i'm at like 99 on geography what is the name of the tallest mountain in the world is it kilimanjaro i would say everest about everest which country has the largest population in the world india russia china that would have been my second guess what are the names of the seven continents of the world? India. Russia? China. That would have been my second guess. What are the names of the seven continents of the world? Europe. North America.

South America. Antarctica. Africa. Australia. Australia. One more. South America. He already said it. Oh, he did. There's one more. Asia. Yeah. Asia. Australia. One more. South America. He already said it. Oh, he did.

There's one more. Asia? Yeah. Asia. Yeah. I was wondering which one you didn't say. I was spinning around. I was going to see if you guys wanted to compete, but you guys are doing this together.

Well, if you ask me what the, I think it's like seven wonders of the world or the wonders of, I couldn't tell you all of them. Great pyramid. What are the seven wonders of the world? I don't, I think maybe the Eiffel tower is one actually i don't know what are the names of the five oceans of the world indian ocean pacific ocean atlantic ocean two more good point you knew one of those was one i didn't know and the other two were one both of these are kind of this last one kind of sucks one of them isn know and the other two were both of these are kind of

this last one kind of sucks one of them isn't but the other one i was like is it like indian sea no you said indian ocean yeah um gulf of america nope the great arctic and antarctic oh i didn't know antctic. Maybe I did. What is the name of the longest river in Africa? The Nile. Correct. He's showing you up, and this is supposed to be your category. No, I said I would not.

Oh, you mean geography. Yeah. Geography, okay. What American city is the Golden Gate Bridge located in? Sacramento. San Francisco. There you go. The other S.

Have you seen the movie with Robin Williams? Which one? The one where he jumps off the Golden Gate Bridge. I haven't seen that one. What's it called? Jumper? No, that's the Santa kid. Maybe it's the

Brooklyn Bridge that he jumps off. Now that I think about it. Yeah, I think it's... Yeah, I think it is in New York. Peter Dinklage is in it. I don't remember that one. Really? I don't even know who that is.

You don't? Who is that? Oh, yep. Okay. He's the... The small guy. He's the book writer and elf. Yep.

He's the guy that makes Thor's axe. Yep. Now we're just... What is the capital of mexico i want to say city i was gonna say i want to say mexico city we need to play trivial pursuit sometime just off air just for our own enjoyment right what is the name of the largest country in the world russia there you go there we go what.S. state is home to no documented poisonous snakes? What? Hit me with that again.

What U.S. state is home to no documented poisonous snakes? Montana. Maine? Nope, but... Oregon? Go. Okay, you're closer. Washington. Closer. Idaho?

No, further away. Close. Oh, it's not Hawaii. Is it Alaska? Yes. Oh, yep. Okay. Where is the Eiffel Tower located?

London, England. Nope. Nope. Paris. Yep. What is the capital of canada ontario nope starts with the no ottawa yep yeah what is the name of the largest ocean in the world that would be the pacific ocean yep can you be more pacific okay and that's all okay what trivia category do you think you would excel at trace none oh sure i bet you could beat him at fucking harry potter lord of the rings

harry potter would be kind of close fifa do you think you could beat Trace at Harry Potter? It would be close. I don't know if I'd win. Okay. You are now about to witness. Because I feel like a lot of the trivia you're going to pull up is going to come from the books. And I haven't read those in forever. You think he's fucking read the books? I've read the books. No.

No way. I think I was like a fifth grader when the last one came out. Best Harry Potter trivia questions for true Potterheads. Are you ready? What is Professor Remus Lupin's secret? He's a werewolf. Bang. One for Trace.

Do you want me to keep score? Sure. Oh. First one sure no oh first one to 10 first one to 10 okay that is trace one ben does not have any points vomit laundry detergent and booger are flavors of what candy beans jelly beans i'm gonna need you to be more specific i think it's called like pots jelly beans birdie bots every birdie bots yeah doesn't count doesn't count actor robbie coltrane played what beloved character in the harry potter movies haggard bang that's two for trace ben is pretty speechless over there Actor Robbie Coltrane played what beloved character in the Harry Potter movies? Hagrid. Bang.

That's two for Trace. Ben is pretty speechless over there. He's just saving it up. He's letting Trace get a quick lead. Yeah, that's what it is. So he can really slam it home. What spell instantly removes the wand from your challenger's hand? Expelliarmus. Bang.

Bang. Actually, it's Expelliarmus. What did I hand. Expelliarmus. Bang. Bang. Actually, it's Expelliarmus. What did I say? Expelliarmus. Armage? It's Expelliarmus. Limgarium Leviosa. Not Limgarium Leviosa. Yeah, we don't need to talk about that. Which Harry Potter character

memorably said, happiness can be found even in the darkest of times if one only remembers to turn on the light. Dumbledore. Yeah, bang. Three for Trace. One for Ben. What is Draco Malfoy's mother's name?

Oh, come on. I don't think I remember. What um does it start with an h no i want to say it starts with like an s or a c it does not start with an s or a c but there is s's and a c in her lucia i don't remember lucius narcissa oh yep this notable diagon alley shop sells robes uniforms and other school supplies is it olivanders no it's not that's a one that's a one shop um this is definitely a book answer i think no i was gonna say borgenberg so that's that's on the madam milken's robes yep that's when you go oh i was just oh no i was gonna uh during his fifth year harry was banned from going on a field trip to what popular wizarding destination wait hold up. You said which year? During his fifth year, Harry was banned from going on a field trip.

I want to say Old Town, but that's from Game of Thrones. Is it Hogsmeade? Yes. But I thought he couldn't go in the third movie because he didn't have his parental slip or whatever. Guardian slip. That is a good point, but it says during his fifth year. Huh.

Interesting. Yeah, I don't know. I don't know why. Old town. Old town. In the Harry Potter books, what is Harry's favorite dessert? I don't remember. Treacle tart. Treacle tart. Before Severus snape who was the potions professor uh professor potions master professor

horse slughorn and head of slytherin house what this is definitely a typo because professor slughorn is put right in between the m and aster before professor snape who was the potions master and it's the answer oh i'm so sorry it got all fucked up what yeah i don't know who made this because they're spelling words wrong um what concoction does hermione give harry and ron to make them appear as crab and goyle in harry potter in the chamber of secrets polyjuice potion correct were you about to say that one no what were you about to say because it sounded like you were about to say something. I was going to say it tastes like cat piss. Goblin piss. Goblin piss.

Damn it. I thought you were quoting one of the zombies characters. Oh, I'm out of ammo. I guess I'll just have to kill them with my breath. That'd be a good quiz. Some zombies. What are the names of Ron Weasley's twin brothers? Fred and George.

I bet I could give him a run for his money. I said it'd be close, and it is not close. It is six to one. I don't know why I was about to say three. It's definitely six to one. I'll let him get to nine. Does the magic fridge have anything besides fireball in it? Oh, yes it does.

No way. No. No, I don't believe you. No. I almost don't believe you. Holy shit. Thank you. Which actor portrayed Albus Dumbledore in the first two harry potter movies

i don't remember his name take a stab you might as well guess a name um gandalf okay richard harris what month day and year is harry Harry Potter's birthday. I would not know this. Is it August 12th? Nope. Was I close, though? You were close in month. Yeah. August 18th.

Nope. You were close in month. The month is wrong, but you were close with the month. Oh. Oh. July 14th. Nope. 1989.

1980 and July.th. Nope. 1989. 1980 and July. Oh. I don't know. July 4th. No. July 5th. Nope. 6th, 7th, 8th.

July 31st, 1989. Oh, God. Yeah, you would have taken you a while. That's why I cut in. What is the name of the house elf who warns Harry Potter? Dolby. Good one. There we go. There we go.

There we go. I paused and then I was going to resume if Trace tried speaking, but then once you said it. To be honest, my first thought, because I thought you were going to finish the sentence with something about his first year. And then I was going to say grip hook. That's a good point. What three schools of magic compete in the Triwizard Tournament in Harry Potter and the Goblet of Horus? Hogwarts.

That's one of them. Good job. The girl school and the boy school. Clutch. I will not accept that, but it is correct. They say it when they're entering, but I don't remember what it is. Durmstrang. Is the boy one.

And? Goldilocks. Periwinkle. Bolbatons. Damn, I was about to say that. I know you were. What is Minerva McGonagall, a professor at Hogwarts School for Witchcraft and Wizardry? Spells.

History. Uh-uh. Think about the very first movie. Charms? No. No, it's like Transfiguration. Damn it. You robbed it from him.

I was looking for the word. You robbed it from him. You were there. for the word you robbed it you were there my brain you were there but trace had to take it i'm sorry before twilight robert pattinson appeared in harry potter and the goblet of fire as a degree okay yeah i was like was that first part of question for twilight before twilight you're like day dusk uh yes what position does Harry prefer? Seeker. Bang.

You got it. I thought about being like, what position does Harry prefer with Ginny? He could have had Hermione. What? While he's drinking, I'll go quick. What is Hagrid's first name? Rubius. Not quick enough. Not quick is that easy at nine now he's at it is nine to three okay i'll start trying you're gonna start

trying now i was afraid of that i'm gonna try i'm gonna try to do really easy ones because i come back and win yeah i'll try to. Yeah, I'll try to give him a chance here. Gryffindor. Nope. Sorting hat. The Hogwarts Express departs from what platform? Nine and three quarter. Got it.

He's making a comeback, folks. He is making a comeback. I'm scrolling through a lot of answers here because I just have a feeling. Dementors. Nope. What are the four houses of Hogwarts? Ravenclaw, Slytherin,

Hufflepuff, and Gryffindor. Got it! And Trace was so stumped over there, I couldn't even think of any of them. Couldn't think of them. Didn't even try to answer. Which Harry Potter character is dubbed the Half-blood prince snape

he just couldn't help it was close it was close should we should we see which ones he might be able to get yeah yeah go for it this clever magical accessory decides which house hogwarts students will students bang you got it you're so good um what is ron weasley's biggest fear spiders he got it in order of the phoenix what kind of collectible plates does a little umbridge just oh cats yeah i was like that fireball is kicking in hard. Tom Marvolo Riddle is an anagram for what? When you rearrange the letters. Oh.

Tom Marvolo. Is it Voldemort? I am Lord Voldemort. Hermione Granger's parents were muggle born and both work as what Excuse me What are Hermione's parents do for a living Oh they're dentists Is that a dangerous line of work

Is the next line In the movie He's like no but some Robbie kid Bit my dad's finger once He had to get seven stitches. How are Sirius Black and Bellatrix Lestrange related? They're cousins. I should have started further down the list.

You would have been able to make this a lot closer. Trace isn't like... You said Sirius Black and then cousins. Alabama. Alabama. Alabama. I got to say, I'm a little disappointed, but that was fun to watch. Trace just mopping the floor.

I'm just kidding. What would be your one versus, you're saying height, undoubtedly no skill challenges. One versus a thousand. I mean, I could go down. 300 would probably be american yeah so what's the average height of americans six two no i think it's six five eleven or five six foot

you said that first number so confidently that i was a little worried that i would google it it's a good point. Pull it up, Jamie. I think it's 6 foot. What do you think? I think it's 5'11". Okay. This is... Or 5'10". The average height for an American adult is 5'9 for men. Damn. And 5'4 for women.

Fucking weak. So I'm average. Well, almost average. Almost average? I'm 5'8 and 7'8. And you are? 7'8. I'm 6'0.

Flat. 6'0. Flat-footed, not on your tiptoes? Right. Good point. On my dick. On my stomach, yeah yeah i'm sick um as far as skills go i could go down like the golf course path like i bet i could change a cup or you know like operate one of those fancy mowers like i'm sure on, not many people would know. But it's about it.

I mean, I don't know. Like you said, the chances of someone in that group being particularly skilled at something that I think I'm skilled at. Dangerous game. It's a dangerous game. And you went with laughing. I don't know. Imagine you picked no scoping a pilot out of a plane and battlefield five that was pure luck that was awesome we gotta see if we can find

that clip i don't think so they deleted like all the clips if you didn't say what that was yeah i got mine all deleted oh no i think i had like one warning and i like read it and i was like oh i should back up my saves and then i forgot and it was a big money grab because the one drive to save it too is like 9.99 a month to save your xbox videos so i was about to do it and i was like 9.99 a month i was like i'll just go through them and like download them and save them never did it went back yep and i was like all these memories are now they're gone they're totally gone like you hitting that or yeah you hitting that zombie with the wafa and the zombie just cartwheeling over the wall thunder gun. The Thunder Gun. What about messages, though? Oh, I don't remember. Because he sent it.

Thankfully, a lot of mine are probably deleted. He sent that video of him no-scoping the dude to the dude that he no-scoped out of the plane. I don't know. But Bill Gates is on my short list. We can look. He's on your mirror with red lipstick. Yeah. He's the next one after that insurance guy.

Right. Yeah. Oh, God. Did you know that, like, one of my first external hard drives, like, it just stopped working on me one day. And he was over at my house. And he was like, let me try this. And he, like, deleted everything. I think I remember you telling me try this. And he deleted everything. I think I remember you telling me about that.

Oh, well. I was like, so where is everything? It's gone. I don't remember. And it just was not working anymore. At your parents' house? Yeah. I was like, this isn't working anymore.

And you went and cleared it. And then I was like it works now everything's cleared it's all gone i felt so bad about that whole incident because you bought like two of those same brand crapped out on me and tracy's like yeah the very first one i ever got is still working strong i mean it's not working anymore but it worked for me until yeah damn i convinced him to buy it because i was like oh dude it gives you so much more storage space well you were like mine's an xbox brand and i was like oh okay i'll get an xbox brand one right and that one crapped out after i think even shorter than the other one yeah so i have i have no clue what that was about so now i'm scared to get them now and so i'm

having to like well all of a sudden trace is now going through a this game phase so i got to delete this game and download this i got about six games that live permanently on and then you cycle between not no that like six games and then when I'm like downloading one, I'll kill two or whatever. Yeah. Because I'm, I've shown you my speed. Like I can get a. Right. Oh, yeah.

I can get a 40 gig game down in like 20 minutes. Right. Sick, dude. I got to. If ever there's a new game that Trace wants to play with me, I'm like, well, we'll play it tomorrow. Yeah. Might as well start it now. I'll i'm like well we'll play it tomorrow yeah might as well start it now i'll start it now we'll play tomorrow oh god i did farming simulator in like 10 minutes i remember that mine

mine didn't take that long i think mine i think I did mine over the course of a day. Like I might have started it in the morning and played later in the day. I don't know. It'd be like that. It do be like that sometimes. On that note, full blast. Thank you guys for recording with me. It's been a pleasure as always.

He doesn't like to do the signature. Okay, he did the signature half this time. The first time we recorded, you're like, that's not how you do it. And you showed me how to do it. You know I'm that bright. I know how to... No, we did this

because all the kids wanted to do it the way we just did it. And I was like, what if we just do it differently? Right. Trace and I were like, let's make the white guy dab. Where it's the most basic, simple. One little slap, one little fist. It's like this.

You've seen that video, right? Maybe. The one guy that's doing all the different ways to well he's just standing there like gives him a hand he's like this and then he's like goes in for an awkward hug and then just walks away thank you guys all for watching and tuning in hopefully you enjoyed this episode again that uh new rambling feud episode will be dropping i don't know tomorrow no because i haven't even recorded it yet but i saturday i would like to record it next week hopefully so

i don't know i might post the questions on like the instagram and see if people want to dm me their answers super bowl probably won't get that many answers, but Super Bowl, Super Bowl is coming up. We didn't talk a lick about that, but you know what? That's okay. Because not every doesn't always have to be talked about,

but it's always been just like, just like anything in life doesn't have to be talked about or discussed. Right. It can just naked grandma i heard he's releasing five new podcasts well you heard from the wrong source because they are obviously not tapped in spotify and apple podcast for audio only all that other good shit you know the drill until next time trace what see you next time no until next time naked grandma naked grandma what