Grass Daddies Podcast - Grass Daddies Podcast Episode 9: Ma Suga Boo (Feat. Lena Nelson)

Episode Date: September 25, 2023

In this episode of the Grass Daddies Podcast, Kam is on vacation with his girlfriend in mexico so Jake is joined by HIS girlfriend, Lena. This episode is just as sporadic as any with lots of laughs, funny stories, and deciding what the perfect assortment of halloween candy would be. Follow us on Social Media! Youtube: grassdaddiespodcast Instagram: @grassdaddiespodcast @kamdenwellmann @jakekillham Tik Tok: @kandenwellmann (yes thats how it's spelled) @jakekillham11

i'm like a you're like a five-year-old no i'm like a dog who you need to have like who needs to take medicine and you gotta sneak the pill into like a hot dog yeah you have to like sneak the vegetables into it did you ever have to like don't worry this is just chicken alfredo with lots of sauce and there's also something else in there Welcome to the You're Being Mean to Me podcast. That's Cam. Wait a minute. Wait a minute. Hold on a second.

Cam. Yeah. Did you do something with your hair? Hold on. I know what it is. You got a nose reduction surgery cam is currently in mexico with our social media manager aka his girlfriend and um standing in this week our first guest lena aka our producer that doesn't do which really all she's done is produce a giant shit

on all my ideas for the podcast so that's not i'm just kidding i'm just kidding i also move all of oh yeah we should probably get the we should probably get all the cans from we didn't clean the set after last week's episode. So, we're going to do that right now on camera. We like to keep it raw out here. We like to keep it raw. Should we show them the pile of cans in the corner? I did at the end of... Was it the last video or the one before?

I can't remember. When you recorded Martin. Yeah. Martin! But on the beer menu this week, our first craft beer being featured on the podcast. Lena's personal favorite. Mango cart. Because I'm a craft beer girly.

She does not like domestic beers. No. Not at all. But, oh my gosh, look how pretty it is. I love the artwork on it. But I like mango carts too but but you won't hang them up on your beer ceiling no there i have mango carts on the scene i thought you weren't putting craft beers up there well just for you i put mango carts on the ceiling thank you big old slug taking a big plug on this so um i was pulling into the driveway today after work yesterday oh okay i was pulling into the driveway and

our two side neighbors silence Silence on set, please. I don't know if they could hear that, but my phone just... Anywho. I was pulling into our driveway and our two neighbors on either side of us were out talking and admiring Steve and... I don't know what his name is. Yeah, okay. They were standing in front of Steve's lawn,

which he just seeded. This is a daddy's podcast by the way um and they were he just put a bunch of seed down and it actually took really well and there's a bunch of grass coming up and they're standing there talking cat there's a cat running around and as i was pulling into the driveway i just go i hope we're not having a best lawn contest because now i'm in third like a total dad and steve was just like oh i don't know about that but then and that was the end of that conversation you gotta love how dads and neighbors just have, like, two second conversations with each other. Yeah. And they don't.

And you don't even know their first name, but you just have. Yeah. But, yeah. God. So. You're all dads. Yeah. Except I don't have a kid.

I'm not an actual dad. No. I will say, though, one time, I don't know if I told you this, but I'll say it for the podcast. Wait, actually, I have something to tell you. You are a dad. Of my kid! I'm a cat dad. Go ahead. Sorry.

See, I'm going to interrupt you now. Yeah. I'm going to get you back for interrupting me a long time. You need to interrupt me a lot today because I deserve it. I can't remember if I told you this or not, but it was a few years ago. So I have a dad hat that says dad on it. It just says dad, period. So it's like a dad dad hat and we were at this like family reunion

type lunch thing at this park in grand island and my grandma goes why does your hat say dad and i just go you'll find out in nine months and she did not think it was very funny didn't think it was funny as i thought it was but grandma carol yep you're name dropping now i'm trying to avoid name dropping and this is what i mean of her shitting on the podcast not really she doesn't actually show the podcast but you were giving me hella shit for name dropping in that one episode first off you didn't it wasn't a family talking your mic please uh first off it wasn't a family member. Talk into your mic, please. First off, it wasn't a family member who you first and last name dropped. And I just said Grandma Carol. Do you know how many grandmas are named Grandma Carol?

I had a Grandma Carol. I don't know. I don't know. But I'm just going by your rules. Well, definitely don't drop last names. Inconspicuous neighbor's names that are a dime a dozen oh look has this one been on the pod yet yeah she was on it before have you given them formal introductions is the question i don't know you can introduce this one because this is your cat they're both

my cats actually everyone meet rue rue would you like to say something to the class? Okay. And then everyone's already seen Martin, the big fat yellow one. But, how did Martin come to be? So, Rue is Martin's mom, even though she is smaller than Martin,

and Martin is way bigger than her. She's his mom-aunt aunt because she had sex with her rue had sex with her brother and biological brother yeah and gave birth to martin hence why there's a few screws loose so rue is martin's mom aunt but we still love him we didn't take him to like a facility that's you know better suited to like you know deal with those kinds of people like an asylum we didn't take him to a cat asylum to be brought up she's rubbing all up on that boom rude if you're gonna do that can you at least say something just make sure she doesn't unplug your mic okay anywho so i was thinking about this today while i was on the

tractor oh now she's rubbing on my boom while i was sitting on the tractor i was thinking about how cam and i conduct conversations on this podcast yeah and i was thinking about i thought of a little comparison cam is like a dog that sees a squirrel yeah he's just like like a dog from like when up yeah like when he's in the middle of a conversation or doing anything his attention will snap to something else and then we're all just like like he'll be telling us something and then he'll be like um and we'll all just be like now we just lost rich as a listener rich was listening he only made it seven minutes and 50

seconds in and now he's gone i felt that rich come back i felt that one coming i i know you raised her right but i'm sorry i'm trying to that just goes to prove nature versus nurture sometimes it's just nature and nurture it slipped out that one did i didn't mean to i felt that one coming and i i got closer to the mic you put some behind it sorry go ahead again so i keep interrupting you okay good so i i think cam is like a dog who sees a squirrel and I am the squirrel I'm constantly I'm like a little more erratic I'm like constantly like thinking about the next thing I want to say the next thing I want to say I'm like hyper engaged in the conversation I'm waiting for him to stop talking so I can say what I want to say now because I already I already have like a idea of what I want to say

and I was telling you this um like I'll have sometimes I'll like throughout the day I'll be thinking about oh I want to bring that up on the podcast yeah um I'll kind of jot down some things And, um, now I'm, now I'm pulling a cam. Um, I can, like, kind of steer cam in the direction of where I want the conversation. This makes me sound like such a selfish person. No. But, like, I have, like, a topic in mind of where I want to go. Yeah. And, like, I have, like, a plan and a strategy and I'm, like, moving along in a certain, certain like and then Cam's just kind of sitting

there like yeah and I'm like kind of trying to steer him in the direction of where I want to go with a certain topic I don't think that makes you selfish I just think that makes you like the babysitter of no I mean I don't know like I, I like to hear myself talk. Well, yeah. It makes me shallow. But you also like Planet, and I like Cam. Both of us just don't think of anything that we want to talk with you about. Well, and it's like, it's because I think what I have to say is more interesting. Oh, okay. Then, yeah.

I know. And I can't help it. I can't help it. I find myself doing this a lot in daily life about a lot of different things where I'm just like, like, sometimes I'll be at work and someone will be doing something and I'll be like, I kind of wish I was doing that because I know I'd be doing better. Yeah. But it's like, I can't, it's almost like like an it's almost like an aspect of ocd or something

because i'm like i'm worried about i don't know it bothers me because i'm like i feel like i could do that more efficiently yeah but i don't know what to tell you on that one brother maybe i don't know with that being said i'm gonna consult my notes because there was a few things i jotted down oh that you want to talk about today yeah oh yeah okay so in the spirit of uh you being the first guest yes um and i know we're not doing this um but cam and i talked about how i think it was cam that brought it up which was so funny he was like we should have a guest on to interview us I was like I was like why would you why would they interview you I know I think we'd be the first podcast in history to invite a guest on to interview the host

because typically the way podcasts work is a host invites someone on yeah and they interview them and then they get traction from their audience and they get their audience to look at them it's like a mutual thing you gotta give them credit that is original that is a that would i mean that would be anywho where's that leading to but do we like invite someone on that is like a friend of ours? And they're like, I want to be on the pod. And we're just like, yeah, you can come on and interview us. That's just so weird. Ask about us.

You know what you guys should do is you should have an episode. I don't know how you would do this because you only have two mics. But you should just have an episode where it's like all the boys from work. Or like they could come up and take turns or something. I don't know. Anywho. That'd be kind of crazy. Where was the interviewing leading?

See, unlike Cam, I'm going to steer you in the direction and keep you on track. Where was the interviewing leading? That was just something funny I thought about that I wanted to bring up. Oh. And I have a horrible memory and I'll forget things that I want to talk about. Martin found a spider. Spider. This is why cats can't be in here why not because they're distracting but they're not distracting me i just want to make sure they're okay um the other thing i wanted to talk about is this week we didn't eat very healthy tonight because we just ate something real quick so we

can record um but this week we've been doing a little bit better we've been having a little bit more healthier meals and you've been making them yes and i like our new system that we've worked out at the beginning of the week well not not just you making me food that's not what i mean because on a typical day-to-day week or work day or whatever she'll walk in the door from work talking with someone on her phone not all the time most of the time well a lot of not every time two days of the week maybe and it depends on the week i'm not trying to attack you here i'm just i'm just sorry i'm getting defensive go ahead okay um but i just want to make sure everyone understands if she's not talking with someone on her airpods the first

things that come out of her mouth are what do you want for supper tonight and what do you want to do tonight so i'm usually like either i don't know and you'll be like or i'll say what i want you'll be like did when you suggested chipotle tonight and i said you can have whatever you want but i really don't want chipotle does that make you think of that no no no i was just thinking how at the beginning of the week we did it differently this week at the beginning of the week you were going shopping and i was aerating because i'm a grass daddy i was aerating my lawn my parents on and my sister and husband's on and you were like i'm gonna go to the store is there anything you want and i was like i don't know just get me some more stuff for lunch throughout the week and you're

like well what do you want for supper this week and i'm like i don't know and i said um and you're like do you just want me to get yeah do you just want me to get the stuff for suppers yeah i was like yes because i don't care did i do a good job of picking suppers do people really it doesn't really matter because you took me having to come up with something and decide something out of the equation you just got the stuff and made it and i didn't even have to think about it it didn't mess with my ocd at all i I did because then I didn't have to think about something and worry about something I'm going like this a lot tonight I'm like a magician

I'm like I didn't have to think about it tonight I just let you make it this isn't very funny but I saw this TikTok a while ago and it was talking about how like there's the division of labor in

relationships like for example i do the dishes uh you take the trash out i refuse to vacuum so you always vacuum i clean the rest of the fucking house um anywho but i saw this tiktok about how there's like a division of labor and relationships and how usually it's women that are deciding what to have throughout the week for like supper and stuff and they're also the ones usually going grocery shopping although nine times out of ten you do come grocery shopping with me but it was essentially talking about how much mind work goes into that into a lot of the tasks for example if i'm cleaning the house i'm thinking about okay what needs cleaned i know the counter needs cleaned okay what do we want for supper i'm gonna plan what we want

for supper this week and then i have to make a list of what we need for groceries and then i have to make the supper and then i have to do the dishes you're right that wasn't very funny i'm sorry you can cut that out if you want no no no i just think it's interesting how the division of labor is like more than you think it is i just never thought about that how like much more mind My mic is falling off the table. Oh, no. You might have to help me. No, it's good. It's good.

No, it's not. Look at it. What the... It's hanging on by a thread. Hold on. Maybe we need to upgrade... It's like not... The other mic stand, too. There we go. Solid as a a rock just don't move it and don't let rue mess with it anymore okay anywho you can cut that out but no it's

it's fine it's like i said we like to keep it raw around here well and i don't use protection i'm not as funny as cam is, so I'm not going to try to make up for that. Well, I don't really. But I'm glad to know that it made your life easier. I mean, it did. Did it not help you by not having to come up? Like you could just grab what you wanted. Yeah.

And I just, I was like, okay, that sounds good. I'll make that from yeah you can look up your little pinterest recipes and just bada bing bada boom head on over to trader joe's bob's your uncle and bang you got a pesto presto you got a pesto trader joe's pesto is my new favorite thing you do like that shit it's really good and it's healthy for you it's a way i can sneak veggies into your diet i'm like a you're like a five-year-old no i'm like a dog who you need to have like who needs to take medicine and you gotta sneak the pill into like a hot dog yeah you have

to like sneak the vegetables into it did you ever have to like don't worry this is just chicken alfredo with lots of sauce. And there's also something else in there. Did your family ever have to do that with Millie? Like, give her pills? And, like, hide food? Or hide a pill? That dog is an anomaly. What do you... So, no?

She hasn't really had any health issues. No. And even the one she... Like, her ear infections, like, that doesn't require a pill. No. They just had to put a little oink in her ear and... You try to sneak a little pill into the bread for, like, Uggs, my parents' dog, and she will eat the entire thing of bread and then spit the pill out. And I feel like... She's got, like, a filter in her mouth. Yeah, and I feel like that's you.

She just, like, runs it over her tongue. Oh, that's not bread. Sp runs it over her tongue oh yeah that's not bread spits it out spits it out um well i was gonna say that you know i don't really want to get political on this podcast that's not the that's not the direction i wanted to take this podcast but guys i think l Lena might be a little racist. Oh, my God. Because we went on a date, right? We went on a date. We went to the movies. We went and got, which, first of all, we went to Texas Roadhouse.

And because I erred, my parents saw, and they gave me a little gift card to Texas Roadhouse. And when we paid for a meal, it covered everything except for 69 cents and i was like yeah yeah yeah 69 cents baby um so then we went to see um i was about i don't know why i was gonna say terrifier 2 we went to see equalizer 3 yeah denzel washington as we as we were pulling into the parking lot there was a black guy just just a black guy pulling out and Lena goes that looks like Denzel Washington I'm like wow okay first off you're racist what who did you say he looked like I didn't say anything that's not true you also listed another man of african-american race and I don't i don't recall he did he had the same face structure

i'm not racist don't be putting that agenda out there i'm just saying you need to be careful i thought it's 2023 yeah and i said it in the watch yourself i said it in the confidence of our car and now you have to blast it to the world okay but what lena is not racist you guys if anything out of our entire friend group she probably is the most woke i probably wait is there a scale to wokeness probably can you be more woke than other people oh yeah absolutely i said i didn't want to be political but i just like is there some people that are just like no i don't really like that kind of race but love who you love like is there a scale yeah definitely i think it's and here's the here's the thing about the word woke woke it's dumb the word woke is dumb it's all about how

educated you are on other and i think that's the level you can't just put a slang term on like no a very big and complex situation i think the level of wokeness quote unquote is just how educated you are on other topics i thought what you were going to say about denzi washington um is i thought you were going to say lean is racist because after the movie because i don't mind action movies if they have a good plot did we even say what we saw yeah i said we saw equalizer three okay you just weren't listening to me because you were waiting for your turn to talk who does that sound like and racist anywho i thought you were gonna say i was racist because we got out of the movie and we were driving in the car and like i said i don't love an action movie unless it's got a good plot but i was saying how if anyone else played his character in those movies like tom if if it was tom cruise i don't

think i would like them as much but i i just love denzi he's just 10 out of 10 and he he just comes off as a better badass than like yeah i think it's just the way he delivers those and his like body language when he's saying the lines and he's like making eye contact with like the bad guys too just like staring them like dead in their soul yeah it just hits different also did you did you notice this is so random but did you notice during the movie that he's like his little lip was like off kilter sometimes. And he just. Yeah. I think Denzel Washington just does that. I think that's like a take of his.

I love that. It's a cute little quirk. You know what I mean? I think. I feel like I've seen other movies where he goes like. Yeah. All right. It just makes me love him more.

Is that racist if I do a Denzel impression? All right. No. That was my. That wasn't a very. Saying the word all right. That wasn't very good a Denzel impression. All right. No. That was my idea. That wasn't a very good. Just saying the word all right. That wasn't a very good Denzel impression. I'm trying to think of a movie where he does that. So, no.

Star Wars. I want to watch Remember the Titans. It's a period piece. This is another debate we've had. Okay. So, you've already mentioned the pooping your pants debate right on this podcast yeah that was like the first maybe the second episode is this just gonna be an episode where we argue no no no no no but remember the titans is not

a period piece probably not period pieces like renaissance or yeah or like great depression like almost like a historic film about like a significant part of history but it doesn't have to necessarily be true a period piece i mean pride and prejudice is a period piece but like you know it's just that are you bored i'm nodding my head even though I haven't seen that. Okay, continue. What do you want to talk about? Well, my wallet fell out of my pocket in the movie theater. Oh, yeah.

And then dropped on the floor and Lena's like, here, don't forget this. Put it in the cup holder. Put it in the cup holder. So I put it in the cup holder and then the movie ended and we left the theater. And we got back to my, our house in the driveway. And I got out and went, my wallet. And so we drove back to the movie theater and Lena called the lady. And she was a G.

Yeah. She was like, I'll hold on to it for you. Then we went back and got it. What an exciting story. And no one stole any of the cash out of your wallet yeah that's the bonus i'm just giving a life update i'm no yeah yeah when you're just when you do a weekly video i i have a question you're missing your co-host and you've just got some other numbskull behind the mic and you got oh my god i have a question

for you and this is a question other people can answer too like i want to know spencer's answer but what is your go-to movie candy and before you answer i have to tell you thinking about this i i have to tell you what my dad's go-to movie candy is no my dad's travel my dad's first off my dad is not gonna guess it he's yeah but hold up he's not gonna buy any candy at the movie theater oh god no is he does he take it in yeah he hides it so this is interesting this is an interesting concept because your dad is very by the book he is very because i remember one time we stole an egg an egg not a whole carton of eggs one single egg we needed one egg for like a cake or a recipe we were making brownies and we told them

that we took an egg one egg from a carton at the store and your dad kind of got a little pissed and he's like just buy the fucking egg so yeah you actually have seen him pissed at me before before i burped at dinner the other night yeah he was pissed i don't even remember what he said but something to the effect of like just buy the fucking carton of eggs yeah yeah yeah i was talking about the burp but oh yeah but i don't know so this is interesting to me. Because you would think, because your dad, on one hand, is very by the book, not a rule breaker. No. But he also, I'm not saying he's a cheapskate, but... He's a little bit.

He's very conservative with how he spends his money. Yeah, yeah. So this is an interesting, this is kind of a toss-up here. Do you A, smuggle candy into the movie theater, which is like a Class A felony. Okay. Or, like, spend more money but help out the business of the movie theater and not bring in outside food and drink. Martin, can you please back off he's just going back and forth like okay now you got your mic set up i'm gonna fuck hers up now that she's got her set up i'm gonna stop cat um hey he i lost my train of thought what what did you just say

about bringing in candy from the theater or into the theater oh uh i think um part of the thing is i mean we always went to the grand downtown yeah they they got more money than god so part of so he didn't feel so he doesn't feel bad about stealing from the big guy i think he thinks he's not even stealing it's not stealing it's just like they don't the seven dollar kit kat that he could buy which is not a clue um like that's not going to make a big difference to them or not so okay you want to guess what i want to try to guess yeah junior mints no uh that is a good guess though for mr seinfeld lover reeseeld lover. Reese's Pieces? No. I don't think I've ever seen him eat Reese's Pieces.

Is it like a candy bar, or is it like little individual candies? Here, I'll give you a hint. It's three things. He gets three things? He brings three things in. Oh, yeah, he brings three things in. Does he bring in, like... I'm trying to think of your dad. I'm picturing him bringing in like granola

but it's probably not granola no it's not two of them are food one of them is a drink okay so does he bring in just like a like a pepsi or yeah pepsi or a coke snickers a snickers yep a snickers and you're never gonna guess i'm guessing a candy it's not a candy um is it like a little like a meat stick or something no i don't think you're gonna guess it you want me to just tell you pickle no although that is closer oh it's closer okay don't tell me it's something he eats it very quietly so like it's fine but usually you would think like tell me he brings in like a muffin like a muffin wrapped up in a napkin no that's another uh he always brings in either coconut or a pepsi a snickers and an apple an apple an apple your dad brings an apple into the movie

and it's not every time but like awesome i've seen it happen multiple times that's got to be one of the loudest things you can eat i know but he does it so quietly like you don't even hear it he's got that shit down just like a climactic scene i just hear i think part of the reason and i look over and he's just like gently quietly just dripping down his hand yeah just dripping down his chin i think part of the reason he can eat it so quietly is that that's also you could switch the snickers for peanut m&ms but like those three things are also his uh hunting snack like he was going hunting so i think he's just mastered eating an apple quietly oh yeah because he's had practice out in the field yeah being able to

quietly eat an apple and not disturb the wildlife it's a large mouth it's a small mouth okay big buck big buck what's your movie candy go-to movie candy right off the top of my head the first thing i picture is the little sweet tart the balls or the yeah the little balls those are better than the than the discs yeah those yeah but i would never normally eat like sweet tart in any form ball or disc so that's what other forms of sweet tart are there i think there's sweet tart ropes isn't there i don't know everyone's been trying to jump on that rope grind ever since nerd had the nerd rope ever since nerd had the nerve to do the nerve to do the nerve road nerd rope um so it's not sweet tarts what is it it was not

sweet tarts or is it sweet tarts that's kind of the first thing that comes to my mind i don't this might sound like sacrilege but i don't like to get popcorn at movies i don't really get that is sacrilege the hell is wrong it's the perfect i don't love popcorn i mean i like popcorn i'll eat popcorn i don't love popcorn either but you get the movie theater popcorn you get the butter drizzled on and then you take the little salt shaker and you fucking douse that shit and then you shake it all up i don't love popcorn either but if you're at a movie then like that is the time to have popcorn i just feel like i don't know have you ever had you know it's stuck in my teeth i know i just uh i'm more of a candy guy i got kind of a sweet tooth so what is what is your candy you still haven't answered the question what is well

probably the sweet tarts or at the movie theater i got skittles yeah but so you're not you're like a fruity kind of candy person. But I also like Reese's Pieces because I like. Peanut butter and chocolate? I like peanut butter. Reese's Puffs, Reese's Puffs. Have you ever had popcorn? Throw in some M&M's.

That is the ultimate TV snack. I'm pretty sure I have. My sister's got this recipe that she used to make. I don't know where she got it from. So, you know like the brown bags at the store when they say paper or plastic? Yeah. One of the big paper bags? Yeah.

She would take one of those, put it in a bag. She would make the popcorn, pop the popcorn, put it in there. I think she would melt like a stick or maybe a half stick of butter. Maybe a stick of butter. Okay. And like a little glass. Yeah. And then put a bunch of brown sugar in that.

Yeah. And then dump all that in there and just shake it up. It may even be more than a stick of butter. I don't know. I'm just thinking about. Maggie, if you you're listening remind me of what that recipe is but it's basically like do you want to shave a couple years off your life eat this hey martin um get him out of there what is under there? Nothing. He just wants to go in. Well, just crack it. So he stops.

Just open it wide so we can see him. I'm just thinking about how greasy that bag would be after. Was it just covered in fucking grease? it gets just like the bottom of it it's just like wet ew it's just like a wet bag but then you dump it in like a popcorn bowl yeah and it's like brown sugary buttery popcorn it's i mean it's delicious you know it's like it's so much you know what um when tori and i were really young we haven't had it in probably years but you know what my mom used to make us all the time when we were like sitting down to watch a movie especially like during christmas time raisins peanut butter peanut butter caramel

popcorn and it was like sticky it was so Honestly, we should ask her for the recipe on Saturday. Why do I feel like you've made popcorn garland? We have not. Although that is a thing. You seem like the type of person that would be like, oh yeah, I've made popcorn garland before. Me individually. Yeah. Or me and my family.

Like you and your family. Yeah, that's what I thought. Or maybe you're like, yeah, let's make popcorn garland to decorate the tree. No. Do you decorate trees with popcorn garland do we is that like you in general like is that something a person does yeah that's something people do but not that how do you make it you just make popcorn and then you like i think you have like like a needle i think you have to take a needle and like string it through oh my god

i don't know though but you know some people add cranberries to it. Why would you? Cranberries are a festive fruit. But then they'd probably become raisins once they dry out. So they'd be craisins. Yeah. Yeah, that's true. It just seems like, of all the food decorations, that just seems so weird to me.

It's what the poor people used to do when they didn't have jack shit. Here we go again. Political. Here we go. I'm talking about in, like, Victorian England. Back when they had candles on their tree. Like a period piece. Like a period piece.

Full circle around here. Oh my lord, our cats are going crazy off camera here. They just love to start some shit. Oh, you guys are focusing on something? Let me disrupt that entirely. Are you number three, In? I thought that was... No.

I thought you've had three. No. And I just... This is my first one. No, it's not. I've had one. I haven't even finished the one are you sure should we talk about what we're gonna be for halloween

or do you want to save that we're getting we're getting close we can talk about what we're gonna be okay but i definitely want to have some halloween themed episodes yeah yeah and are we for sure that well let's just so jake suggested the idea that because he's six foot six and tall as a motherfucker that he's six six and tall yeah two different adjectives um descriptors i guess but he suggested that he go as Pop Onion and that I go as Babe the Blue Ox. Yes. I definitely think we should do that. You think so? I think that'd be fun.

I told my mom that and she thought, that's not very cute. Like she thought the idea was funny, but she was like, how are you going to make that cute? I almost said something not very woke. Don't say it there. You already probably got me canceled for claiming i'm racist i was just gonna say that all women oh god if you start off a sentence with all women not all women but it is a very common practice for girls to just take some animal and then just make it sexy animal yeah but sexy insert animal yeah sexy bunny sexy cat okay we get sexy box we get the point oxes are hot i don't know about that oxes are hot i do think i'm gonna have to get like a fake septum see you could make it hot here's

what i'll say two things a sexy animals is what single girls do on halloween don't fall into the stereotype be sexy and have a man and b what i was gonna say is i like i think the only reason that i'm like down to do paul bunyan and actually there's multiple reasons a i love that richie would love that we need to tell him that that's because he is not a um what's the word he just loves paul bunyan and babe the blue ox like he just likes that well but um what is the term for like sasquatch and cryptids is he technically a cryptid paul bunyan yeah like no no but i do think they're like cryptid adjacent because like i told you the other day the there is a whole story about how paul bunyan like went to go hunt down the hoedag. Yeah, see?

They're like cryptid adjacent. So a cryptid would be like Sasquatch, the Loch Ness Monster, a leprechaun? Mythology? Lore? Yeah. A cryptid. I don't know what justifies how you define a cryptid.

So then what would be a cryptid adjacent?ul bunyan what else um what would be like because it also kind of reminds me of like like jack and the beanstalk yeah those are just like i would say they're those are just like maybe it's more like it's more like folklore really yeah. Yeah, folklore. I think that sounds more right. And Rishi loves that type of shit. Folklore. The lore of the folks.

What was I going to say? God damn, you interrupted me and now I lost my train of thought. I'm just kidding. This is my show we're talking about right just kidding um no i just think my mom meant like i don't know she probably is like just like just my the past outfit all of my outfits the past couple years have just been centered around me being tall yeah like uh i, uh, I was the green giant. Yeah.

And what was I then? See, I'm always your sidekick. When am I going to get this? So one year I was the, the green giant and she was a pea, a pea sprout. So, so far you've been my sidekick. And, but, but last last year what were you last year i was a jackalope but last year we didn't like i kind of half-assed halloween just not the same you couldn't freaking decide on what you wanted to be and i'm saying freaking because i feel like

your parents are watching um who cares i've said the f word like five times. But the other reason. I don't cuss. Is because like. Um. We just like didn't have any Halloween plans. You know what I mean? Like it was kind of a bummer Halloween. Yeah. A little bit. This year we got like.

We should throw a party. We've thrown a couple good parties this year. Yeah. That have had a few people at them. think we might have to get any yeah probably a new boom little here comes the boom i'm bantering or riffing in order to fill space okay sorry dead air don't want dead air do you want another question about candy that i have are you tired of talking about candy air don't want dead air do you want another question about candy that i have or are you tired of talking about candy i don't care okay there's no framework to these episodes

um i do have another question this is my favorite question i feel like this is how i get a read on people not my it's one of my like this is like an iq test don't bring up the iq test i i'm not kidding oh okay don't make me don't make me a first off a stupid racist yeah seriously a stupid racist sidekick yeah crazy cat lady yeah okay martin um so alcoholic i mean you've had what four beers now yeah i'm thinking about cracking one i think i'm gonna have but if you're gonna drink them all sorry then can i ask my question yeah okay go right ahead i wish you would ask it um if you so you know when halloween comes around since we're on the topic of Halloween, when Halloween comes around, there's candy bags.

And, like, each bag has, like, five or six candies. Let's say five. If you, but they never have, like, all the good ones together. Like, there's always one that has Snickers, but Snickers and Reese's peanut butter cups are never together. Oh, like at the store when you're buying like an assortment? Yeah, like when you buy the bag that has like different kinds of candies in it for Trader Treaters. Like in order to get the Reese's one, I have to get the Almond Joys and the Heath Bars and the 100 Grand candy.

Yeah. So although 100 Grand really grew on me. But my question for you is if you could make your own candy bag which candies would you have like to sell to store yeah but there's only you can only choose five five see i keep burping but i'm doing it off the mic because i'm respectful sorry about that uh you see that little sound wave from my burp? Yep. Reese's? Yep. Butterfinger?

Wait, Reese's peanut butter cups or Reese's pieces? Peanut butter cups. Okay, getting it. Reese's. Butterfinger? Butterfinger. Snickers. See, I can't include like candies.

I can't include like peacho because that's not even a thing no i mean it's gotta be ones that so but there are ones that have like little bags of things like little bags of skittles oh so then i i guess i would maybe do skittles and instead of like a mini hershey's i'd do a mini cookies and cream hershey's okay okay a pretty solid lineup i would not i mean i would buy that in a heartbeat if i saw that i'd be like this is the fucking test sorry this would be this is like the what is it what's the what's the epitome no no no like the golden the golden ratio okay what is it with like the triangle in math i have no anyways i think it's called low on my iq test i don't know i didn't hey i wasn't gonna bring it up so can i say mine yes snickers would have to be in there

because you snickers you really can't go wrong with. At any time, especially if you're hungry. Golden ratio. You looked it up. It's not a triangle. But it's this thingy. Does anyone remember this? Let me see. Oh, yeah.

Remember seeing that? Yeah. The ultimate guide to understanding. A seashell, like a little swirly. Over the axes. So Snickers has got to be in there. Snickers. Reese's peanut butter cups yep and this is where i'm probably gonna ruffle a few feathers personally i love a baby ruth

okay i mean you're not i don't think you're gonna offend anyone with that um i don't like crunch bars so keep those bitches out of there i i like crunch bars but if there's no other chocolate i'll eat them yeah that's only if there's like oh it's that's my only option yeah i'll gladly eat it i do like an almond joy but i don't think i would want that on my back honestly aren't that bad no i just love candy yeah is there really there's really no such thing as a bad candy to me i feel like i gotta do so i got snickers i got baby ruth i got reese's peanut butter cups i kind of feel like i need to throw 100 grand bar in there because

as much as i don't like a crunch you have so many options they're good though again i love all candy and i'm not gonna i don't hate candy it does kind of take away from my statement i just said about hating crunch bars though because they do have like the little crispy things aren't they kind of like the same thing yeah but they've got like so caramel in the middle off brand no it's like it's like the crunch bar got like a makeover like it's like crunch bar covering like i feel like there's like cookie wafer or whatever and then there's caramel in the middle and it's fucking fantastic if you want something like really sweet i don't know what i would do for my last one he's cleaning himself yeah what would your fifth one be gotta be another chocolate and i feel like i'm missing a chocolate chocolate bar

snickers reese's peanut butter cups do you like Butterfinger I do like Butterfinger yeah I'd probably do Butterfinger I love I have a love hate relationship with Butterfinger because I love it but it gets stuck in my teeth so bad yeah so bad I remember one year for my birthday

Maggie's friend got me two Butterfingers and I was like what that's sick that's sick that's like the best gift ever not really two butterfingers i didn't know i could i mean for like you so like my sister's friend it's just like she didn't have to do that it was just like such an unexpected just here you go it's like two butterfingers hell yes do you know what butterfingers make me think of driver's ed why because we would have them at our high school and it'd be like at like seven o'clock at night and i'd be hungry i'd

want some candy because we didn't really keep candy in the house i don't know if you've met my mother but um so i'd walk down to the vending machines and i'd be like butterfinger i want a butterfinger and then i'd sit the rest of driver's ed just like picking it out of my teeth so we kind of talked about this because i got my since i turned 26 i had to get a new license and you were talking about how what is it if you live within if you live more than a mile I think it's a mile and a half away from your school then you get in the country then you can get a license at 14 but it's not like because if you're inside a mile and a half they're like walking's good for you well yeah or you'd have to take the bus yeah

i don't know why so at what age so what age do you take driver's ed for to get your actual license i think or was it in order to be able to drive to school yeah in order to be able to drive to school so was it like driver's ed or was it like a special no it was like a different class no it's like driver's ed and then so we would like no it was like a different class no it's like driver's ed and then so we were like we'd go over to the classroom we'd learn all the rules with our crazy fucking teacher i'm not gonna talk about him on here you took this through raymond yeah there was a there's a teacher that taught at raymond central i probably shouldn't can you bleep that out because everyone's gonna to know him.

Whatever. It doesn't matter. Anywho. Nobody listens to this podcast except for Gavin, Spencer, and Corbin. Shouts out to you guys. Anywho. So he was like certified through whatever. I think it was through Wahoo.

Like whatever. Name dropped another school. Through the city. The town of wahoo but burped again and then we went and took the driving test okay and we took it in wahoo did you have to go like before school or was it after school so i didn't have to take driver's ed why i didn't do it through my school. I did it like through. Like the D is it the DMV that technically doesn't. I didn't do it through the DMV.

I did. Well, I can't remember exactly what the program was, but I went to like Northeast. I didn't have to do like any written bullshit. I didn't have to sit in any classes. Yeah. I just I don't even know how how this worked but i met with this guy who was like my instructor and there was like a student driving vehicle yeah and i got super lucky because not only did i not have to like sit in any classes, but the person that was supposed to be my partner for it,

like dropped out at the last minute. So I was by myself. So normally when you have to like sit in the back while someone else drives for an hour and then it's your turn to drive for an hour. Yeah. I didn't have to do that. I just had to do my hour of driving and then I was done. And the first day he was like,

so how many hours do you think you've spent behind the wheel like having my learner's permit yeah and i honestly had no idea what to say and i don't even remember what number i gave but whatever number i gave must have been like drastically lower than he was expecting or what he normally gets maybe like Like maybe I was like two. Okay. Or something like that. Yeah. Because I was thinking like in terms of like total run time of me behind a wheel. I was like maybe a couple hours. What he said.

That's what he said? Yep. He farted. No. I don't think he said anything. But after my first day of driving. And obviously I'm just like Paul Walker when I'm behind the wheel. Not actually driving like Paul Walker in the movies, but I was just really good at driving.

Martin! Get out of here! Keep going. keep going after my first session of driving he basically was like you've only got two hours behind the wheel like you drive well for like i drive drived i drove pretty well and so he was like surprised that he's like it has to be more than that i think he said that like it has to be more than that look at you and so i think it was only for a week like like literally five days before he took your test like the fifth day was i drove around for an hour and he just had me do specific things and didn't help me like the four days leading up he would like help me you know tell me what I needed to do. And then the fifth day during my hour, he didn't say anything.

And he just like told me where to go to. And then at the end, he basically was like, well, you pass with flying colors. And then I was able to get my license. Mine was like weeks long. You lucky little. I got so lucky to get lucky um you want to know what just lay down can you just lay down and not mess with the mics you know what our driver's ed teacher did so we we had to sit in class unlike you because you didn't have to like

take like a class class there you go right no i didn't okay didn't. Okay, so we had to, like... I still had to do, like, in the DMV, like, past the... The written test. The whatever, whatnot, yeah. Yeah. So, we had to take, like, a class class. We did the written test, but then we also, like, you did, we, like, got in with partners, whatever, and we went and drove around on random fucking days. Mm-hmm. and we went and drove around on random fucking days um and we'd be driving around lincoln or

wahoo and then he'd lean over at random points and he had he was right right now he always had a bag of always had a bag of peppermints and you go you want a peppermint and it was like he was testing us to be like like he did it while you were driving oh because if you were just like sure i'll have one he just goes clicks his pen and you're like he didn't even do that right now he's like i think if you said yes he would have been like no i'm telling you this man this man was one of a kind and then we'd always have to stop at a gas station so i could get more peppermints in a drink what yeah gas station has peppermints like a bag of like little peppermints peppermints like the peppermint candies the red and white ones what gas station has peppermints on hand i've seen you know like the ones with

like the blue and yellow bags they have bags of like peppermint candies. Next time you go to a gas station, look and see if they have peppermint candies. Because I'm going to do the same and I'm curious. I can guarantee. We're going to start a new trend. Where are the peppermints? Just kidding. Oh! Did he claw you?

Yeah. That wasn't very nice, Martin. You clawed your mother and you're knocking shit over. We might have to stop letting him in here. He's being kind of a nuisance. Most podcast cats, I feel like, just come in, sit on their owner's lap, and are just nice. Like James and Kelsey's cat? Yeah.

Look at it. His little tails are flicking the beer cans. He is crazy. He does have a screw loose. He's the incestuous brain. He also is an anomaly of an animal. Yeah. He looks like he's doing homework.

He's studying. I took a picture of him last week when you and Cameron were doing the podcast where he was... I'll show it to you later. He was like pressing keys on the keyboard. I know. No, he's good. He's good he's good um have i told you about the story of what that teacher did in our history class

um yes for the holocaust unit yeah where he's like you're a jew bang you're dead yeah and he like lined us up in line no it wasn't like you're a jew it was like oh you were all jews we were all jews okay you make shoes you work in a factory you're a trumpet player like you're a jew it was like oh you were all jews we were all jews okay you make shoes you work in a factory you're a trumpet player like you get to live because they want to hear you play the trumpet yeah you just bake okay dead dead and you're like that's wild that's one way to teach a unit public school man geez you've drank a lot you drank four mango cards it's a lot um i'm gonna spend thirsty i do kind of have to pee but well i kind of like doing this maybe we should start our own that'd be a great idea like we've talked

about i've been telling you i want to start a podcast. I'm just kidding. Well, just like Cam and I did one day. We were just like, we just got to do it. Let's just do it. Okay. The studio is in our house. So there's nothing stopping us from recording more. And we own both of the mics. This one's technically yours.

I bought you this one as a gift. So I should have let you use it. But it's newer, so I'm using it. Is it smaller? Because as we discussed, I'm selfish. You're not actually selfish. I'm not really that selfish, but I have selfish tendencies. That's okay.

Who doesn't? I feel like you could almost probably look at it as like a survival, in terms of survival. If you're not concerned about furthering yourself and you would die um do you think you would survive in the world war z zombie apocalypse so this is what we were talking about before the podcast i saw a video. There's a YouTube video, and it was titled, Why You Wouldn't Survive World War Z. And what World War Z is, it's a zombie movie that has Brad Pitt, for those of you that aren't familiar. And it was basically a YouTube video. But hold up.

The first thing you need. Yeah, it's got Brad Pitt. But the zombies in the World War Z zombie movie are not normal zombies. Like, they're not walking dead slow. And this was one of the points. They're, like, super fucking fast. Yeah, they're, like, they just dead sprint. And he's just going, like, bit by bit for the movie and he is like basically going through all these different like plot points

and saying why you wouldn't survive this part yeah and one of his things was like they get infected in 12 seconds once they get bitten so that's another reason why it would be very hard to you know and he's like they went when they were in the city and that's where they were in the middle of a city when the outbreak started like you probably wouldn't be able to get out of there yeah because of how fast they move and how fast it was spreading i was just like oh my god i don't think anybody like watching this movie was like no i could totally i could totally survive this part so your answer is no well no obviously not i mean what if you have what but it would depend on where i'm at if i'm if you're telling me you're right next to like you're the

car next to brad pitt or is it like where i'm at now in nebraska i don't know i i say i don't know i don't know man i feel like i would have decent chances in Nebraska because you go out west a little bit and it's like miles of sand hills. Yeah. There's no people out there. It's pretty desolate. Wait, that also means you have to rely more on yourself. Like, you better get a cow and some fucking plants to plant. It would be more of just like raw survival yeah versus fighting off

zombies um are you gonna ask me if you think i would survive i wasn't planning on it why not do you think you'd survive the world no here's what here's what's gonna happen if there is ever a zombie apocalypse i'm not trying to live through that shit i am jumping off a building and i can't say that you can't do that you why lena hates zombie movies and like the idea of zombie apocalypses and i'll watch i i don't mind watching them i just have to watch something happy afterwards but here's here's what here's the way i think about it um if there was a zombie apocalypse first off i've thought a little bit too much about this because honestly the reason i don't like zombie movies is because i watched shauna the dead with my mom when i was like five years old which is a horror comedy yeah and i was

scared shitless i'm not kidding you i would not go to sleep for like two weeks and i would sit on the stairs and i would cry so i think i was a little scarred um you want another quote i told my mom do you know the movie no so i was sitting on the stairs crying like night three after watching shauna the dead sitting on the stairs crying yeah i was sitting on the stairs crying, like, night three after watching Shaun of the Dead. Sitting on the stairs crying? Yeah, I was sitting on the stairs crying at my parents' house. Like, why were you crying at that point? Because I was so fucking traumatized.

I was still scared. So for three days straight, you were just like a blubbering mess? Well, like, when it got dark and it was time for me to go to bed, I was, like, freaking the fuck out. You were just scared. Yeah, but you want to bed, I was like freaking the fuck out. You were just scared. Yeah. But you want to know what I told my mom? Is it FDR that said, you have nothing to fear but fear itself? I don't know who said that.

Do you not like this story? What's that look you're giving me? I just don't know who said that, but I have heard that quote before. Okay. Well, whoever said that quote, I was sitting on the stairs and i told my mom at like five years old i think i know what fdr meant when he said you have nothing to fear but fear itself because i was like i'm so tired of being scared i'm sure your mom got a nice chuckle out of that she probably did up later but at the moment i think she was consoling me but if we are in a zombie apocalypse this is what you have to think about first off we live in our own house all of our loved ones are in a zombie apocalypse, this is what you have to think about. First off, we live in our own house.

All of our loved ones are in different houses. The odds of you getting to them or them getting to us vary a lot. Or you go out there and you get to them, but they're already zombies. And then you have to see your loved ones as zombies. Also, what are we going to do with our cats? Are cats going to become zombies? I don't know. Martin's not going to make it in the apocalypse.

He'd provide a zombie with at least three days of food. His big ass. Rue might make it. I think Rue could live through the apocalypse. She'd probably be the last thing to survive until the very end. Yeah. To very end. Yeah. To whatever end.

But that's why I don't... Like, then I just think too much about if there actually is a zombie apocalypse. Like, I'm going to have to see the world I know fall apart. Yeah. Like Bird Box. Have you... You've seen Bird Box. I've seen YouTube videos of it. That one also scarred me a little bit didn't that come out during the pandemic yeah i think so like a couple years ago yeah

when you were like 21 yes but it was also during the pandemic when the world was changing and i was like the world might be ending also like their world is ending so you just sat on the couch and you looked at julia and you're like i know what fgr meant i don't watch it with julia i'll watch it with hayley she was also scared but we were also living in the house oh the house the house. That was fucking haunted. The sketchy house. Yeah. The haunted house.

Yeah. I want to talk about scary movies, but I want to save that for... Fine, I'll stop. We can start our own podcast. Maybe we'll see, we'll gauge how much traction this gets. Speaking of haunted houses, our cat's behind the door. Did you think the door was just moving by itself did you think the door was just by itself um but depending on how much traction this episode gets we might we might have to start our own podcast i always think we should do it well yeah we should i think it'd be fun but

like this one is mine ours can be yours you edit it upload it yeah but i all that stuff or do i have to do that too no we could do that together we could go back and forth because i also want to start one with julia are we just going to become a podcast couple yeah i mean i don't like it's fun to just sit and talk i love talking me too i love talking if anyone listening to this knows me you know i love to talk yeah i have no issue with it but are you gonna wrap it up yeah you're gonna give a grass daddy's tip at the end of this episode even though you're one just one grass daddy um yeah i think yeah i think i am did we even say my name during this whole thing yeah i said lena at the beginning i said welcome lena i don't remember it's the first guess the four cans of yeah you're obviously drunk off your ass wasted go ahead sorry i was just gonna say follow us on instagram

grass studies podcast our social media manager hasn't really posted much on there she's a busy woman she's busy and she's busy right now in mexico um can't wait for you guys to get back and maybe listen to something. Woohoo! Follow us on social media. You want to plug your... Hey, shameless plug. You want to plug your social media on here? Plug my own personal Instagram. Do you plug your own personal Instagram on here? Yeah, jakekillum on Instagram.

I'm pretty sure my Instagram is lena nelson4. Follow lena nelson4 on Instagram if you like what you see here. I'm taking those. You can rent her on the weekends. Did you just say they can rent me on the weekends? Hey, I'm as woke as it gets over here. Okay. Are you going to dot me up like Cam does?

Sure. I feel like I'm going to. You know how to do it? No. It's just a slap and a fist bump Oh, okay Okay, ready? Until next time Tomorrow's Friday

I'll be back again And again And again And again And again And again Are we gonna go watch some Jersey Shore? Jersey Shore! Jersey Shore!

I'm gonna fucking fist bump to my fucking arm, bulldog!