Grubstakers - Episode 57: Kylie Jenner

Episode Date: March 11, 2019

This week we cover the worlds youngest billionaire Kylie Jenner. Join us as we discuss how she built a make up empire off improper labor practices, stealing intellectual properties from artist and passing it off as her own and how the Kardashian-Jenner clan got to having 1.8 billion dollars collectively. Andy also provided a touching in memoriam segment for Ehud Arye Laniado the billionaire who died after penis enlargement surgery. Enjoy!

Hey everyone, thanks for checking out Grubstakers, the podcast about billionaires. This week we're covering the youngest billionaire of all time, Kylie Jenner. Listen up as we talk about her inhumane labor practices, how she's stolen her ideas to make her profit, and a special In Memoriam segment for a billionaire that we recently lost. All that and more this week on Grubstakers. Get lost, please. Thank you. I can tell you that every job has its ups and downs,

and a union can't change that fact. I mean, it is the magic elixir of our age and of all ages. What it does for prostate cancer is amazing. You get a $200 billion profit and you didn't have to pay any tax. Isn't that true? Listen, it's... Is that true or not? Yes or no? It is. You do not pay a profit when someone... a tax when someone makes you sell assets.

Maybe that was what you said. You become Secretary of Treasury so you didn't have to pay the tax there. Oh. In 5, 4, 3, 2... Hello, hello. Welcome back to Grubstakers, the only podcast about billionaires. I'm Sean P. McCarthy, I'm here, and we got the full team today. I'm joined by... Yogi Poliwal. Andy Palmer.

Steve Jeffries. And we got some great news. If you've ever said on Twitter, you know, this podcast, it's very intelligent, it really covers these deep issues, complicated, all that stuff. If you've ever said any of that, we're going to make you hate yourself. None of you have said that. Sean is imagining this in his head. If you ever thought,

Yogi should talk about billionaires that eat or don't eat ass more, this is the episode for you, ladies and gentlemen. If you've ever said nice things, instead of just complaining about how we have a nasally voice, if you've ever done that, yes, this is the episode where we let you down. Yeah, that's right. We read the Comptown Sabrato.

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Because we're talking about, I say with a nasally voice. I'm dropping my voice. I got a radio voice now. Yeah. Today we're talking about Kylie Jenner. That's right.

The youngest self-made billionaire in the world, according to Forbes, in history. Younger than Mark Zuckerberg. Mark Zuckerberg became a billionaire at 23. What's that sound? Do you guys hear that? Yeah, what is that, Andy? Oh my gosh, it's royalty-free synthesized pocket bells, canon in D major, transposed to C major.

Oh my god. Have we had some sort of issue with music royalty recently? Some sort of thing about playing Drake songs when we shouldn't? I don't know, but I I think this means that we have to do our in memoriam segment. Oh, okay. Well, I mean we have been doing this for a year. I do think that we should reference some billionaires that

have passed on to greater pastures. Well, I looks like I've got an In Memoriam thing already written up, so I guess I'll just read it for our audience. Take it away, Andy. In Memoriam, Ehud Ayer Laniato, age 65, died Saturday, March 2, 2019, in a private Parisian clinic while getting penis enlargement surgery. His cause of death was heart attack

after an unidentified substance was injected into his penis. Beginning his career as a masseuse at the Tel Aviv Hilton and without any formal education, Mr. Laniato discovered in his 20s that he had a talent for raw diamond valuation. Using this talent to build a small fortune, he then discovered that he had an even more lucrative talent, laundering blood diamonds. Arbitraging diamonds used to fund armies of child soldiers in Angola and the Congo, Mr. Laniato started the company Omega Diamonds. Business proved to be

remarkably good as while Laniato's net worth is not publicly known, likely due to the fact that Oh. Oh. It's said to have only forgotten about his diminutive height when his accountant told him his bank account balance, which he requested several times a day. His major life accomplishments include selling the world's most expensive diamond, the Blue Moon Diamond, to Hong Kong businessman and convicted felon Joseph Lau Luen Hung for $48.4 million, as well as avoiding a tax evasion trial with the Belgian government with a no-fault settlement of 160 million euros. He has succeeded by nobody because he was a miserable, loveless man whose only positive contribution to the world was having his heart explode during penis surgery. Rest in hell. I'm going to miss that guy.

I mean, who's going to raw dog diamonds now? I will say that injecting an unknown substance into a billionaire's penis to kill him is my favorite level of Hitman. You have to sneak into the clinic and then you replace the regular injection

with the rat poison that you find in the basement somewhere. Oh, okay. Nice. The level layouts are very good. That is Sean and I's favorite game series. Yeah, well, rest in peace to the billionaire who died during

a penis enlargement surgery. What was that guy's name, Eddie? Laniato. Wait, Ehud. I already put away the pages. Ehud, I, or Laniato. Oh, all right.

Bad for him. Age 65. At death. I mean, how much money did he have for him Age 65 At death I mean How much money did he have? He was a billionaire? I mean no one knows exactly How much money he had Because

He's just a diamond Yeah Omega Diamonds Was a private company And He laundered money For Child Soldier armies

So He was probably murdered I guess He needed a bigger dick Because he didn't have that big dick energy how many y'all like private primitive accumulation but alas today we're talking about the one the only speaking of child soldiers that's right we have the youngest according to so this was like a minor controversy online is that Forbes magazine has their own definition of self-made essentially. And

Kylie Jenner, according to Forbes, as of March 2019 has become the youngest self-made billionaire in history. And I found an interesting piece of writing on what it kind of means to be a self-made billionaire that I thought I would read from for you guys.

This is, let's see, okay. I'm going to start from the beginning. It's volume one, part one, Commodities and Money. Chapter one, the commodity. All right. Part one. 20 minutes later.

The two factors of the commodity. Use value and value. Substance to value, magnitude of value. The wealth of societies in which the capitalist mode of production prevails appears to be

an immense collection of commodities. The individual commodity appears as its elementary form. Our investigation, therefore, begins with the analysis of the commodity. The commodity is, first of all, an external object, a thing which, though its qualities satisfies human needs of whatever kind, through its qualities, I'm sorry, the nature of these needs, whether they arise, for example, from the stomach or the imagination, makes no difference.

Nor does it matter here how the thing satisfies man's need, whether directly as a means of subsistence, i.e. an object of consumption, or indirectly... Andy, we practice Juche here. Motion to purge, Andy. I've still got, like...

I can't wait till the estate of Carl. Andy, I didn't mind when you took a fucking 40 minutes to make a royalty-free song sound worse somehow. But just straight reading a book that I don't even understand is worse.

What? This is the Kylie Jenner episode. It's the ass-eating episode of the century. Now we're going to get a DMCA takedown notice from the estate of Karl Marx. Every useful thing, for example, iron, paper, except, wait, I'm not... We're too good to read the entirety of Karl Marx's

Yes, we are too good for that. Capital Volume 1. Can we do... I'm not reading Volume 2. No, don't worry. Or 3. Are you finished? Well, no. Is it

48 hours later? Alright, well, what do you propose? We don't talk about Kylie Jenner on this episode? We tease Kylie Jenner? No, I just want to explain what a self-made billionaire is. Andy. Every useful thing is a whole composed of many properties.

It can therefore be useful in various ways. The discovery of these ways and hence of the manifold uses of things is the work of history. Okay. So also is the invention of socially recognized standards of measurement. Yes, of course. For the quantities of these useful objects. Karl Marx predicted Instagram. This is a great segue into Kylie Jenner, who actually is an example of the dialectical unity

between use value and exchange value. I guess we could just skip over the actually interesting stuff and go straight to who Kylie Jenner is. Thank you. Please enlighten us as to why Karl Marx is relevant when we are discussing a woman like Kylie Jenner. I was getting there. Oh, my God.

Measures for commodities arise from the diverse nature of objects to be measured. Sean, he put the book away. And in part from convention. He even put a bookmark in being like, I'll open this page later. Makes it a use value. And then you would open your fucking rat mouth. Oh, God damn it. So Kylie Jenner

is the youngest billionaire. She was born in 1997. At the end of the episode, Andy's like, hey guys, I'll edit this. And then he takes it home and goes, you know, so what I didn't get to is... Hey, everyone.

Hey, everyone. Andy here. I feel like my co-host cut me off before I really got to the part of Karl Marx that I think is most relevant. I'm just saying that the value of a commodity needs to be understood in order to... Okay. Chapter eight. Oh, we're not even close.

I just say you go from commodity and that's broken into use values and exchange values. We're only on unity pair 4 of 16. And that's synthesized into values, which is then broken into the dialect between concrete labor and abstract labor. Can the Black Slope Socialists of Twitter dox Andy, please? And this is then synthesized into form of exchange value, which is then dialectically broken into equivalent form and relative form, which is then synthesically broken into equivalent form and relative form, which is then synthesized into money form. So my host, my

co-host cut me off while I was still in Capital Volume 1, but there were also passages from Capital Volume 3 that I was planning to read. You're probably wondering where the rest of the summary of Volume 1 is. Well, we thought of that. I mean, you guys are lucky that I didn't do the Grundry, so either. Volume 5, turn up are lucky that I didn't do the Grundry, so either.

Volume five. Turn up the volume on this one. Yes. But so when we're discussing Kylie Jenner, it is interesting. It is interesting because I guess like kind of the conceit of this podcast is that we trace the approximately 2,000-ish billionaires in the world, many of which are very publicity shy, hiding from hiding their evil deeds. And we try to expose them

because sunlight is the best disinfectant. We try to expose them to the harsh glare of publicity. Yes, we shed light to the darkest corners of the billionaire's world. But when we're talking about a billionaire like Kylie Jenner, that is the worst idea possible. So essentially, this episode about kylie jenner will make kylie jenner richer of course because the entire kardashian business model which i think is pretty fascinating

and i have encouraged us grubstakers to copy it it's essentially just you have tons of bullshit with your name on it you know like tons of tons of lines of products all different bullshit to sell and then you constantly try to go viral get attention spread controversy anything to get your name in the press and then no matter what the press is people will come look for you and suddenly you have shit to sell so essentially you make money off of being famous right being in the news you know and um i guess i do want to say we should maybe just talk a bit about the self-made thing because again as andy was getting to i know on our rupert murdoch episode amy therese talked about kind of the marxist interpretation or interpretation of how obviously nobody no billionaire is self-made. Oh, Andy, you got something on March?

On our Rupert Murdoch episode. We edited it out when Amy was reading the rest of the passage that Andy was getting to. Precisely. Well, Forbes' own definition that they used for her ranking of seven is, quote, self-made, who got a head start from wealthy parents and moneyed background. And to elaborate on that, the usefulness

of the thing makes it a use value, but this usefulness does not dangle in mid-air. Wait, is this... Am I still on chapter one? Yes. Am I still on chapter one? It is conditioned by the physical properties of the commodity and has no existence apart from the latter. It is therefore the physical properties of the commodity and has no existence apart from the latter.

It is therefore the physical body of the commodity itself. For instance, iron, corn, a diamond, which is the use value or useful thing. Oh, okay. This property of a commodity is independent of the amount of labor required to appropriate its useful qualities. There's just going to be a pause at the end of it. He's like, still listening? Okay. Now, this is where I left off.

When examining use values, we always assume that we are dealing with definite quantities, such as dozens of watches, yards of linen, or tons of iron. The use values of commodities provide the material for a special branch. Guys, I am reading the background to this. Yes. Well, anyways, what I wanted to say was that people were obviously rightly roasting this on Twitter and elsewhere. The idea that Kylie Jenner is self-made is inherently absurd. But it is doing an interesting thing where I think it is maybe raising public awareness that maybe no billionaires at all are self-made when you have somebody as absurdly not self-made as Kylie Jenner.

I was getting to that. Forbes, their own definition, it just refutes itself almost. It's just self-made, but they still got a head start from wealthy parents and money background. Yes. Well, they have to have roots in money to make money.

Yeah, I mean, she was born on third base, but also you know... Does anyone want to know how you use money to make money? Because I have useful resources. My greatest beef with the Forbes calling Kylie Jenner self-made is, of course, they are discounting all of the hard work that O.J. Simpson did murdering her ex-wife and her friend.

Are we going to go into a backstory? Yes. Okay, starting from the beginning. All right, so Caitlyn Jen okay. So we're going to... In order to make... Are we going to go into a backstory? Yes. Okay, starting from the beginning. All right, so Caitlyn Jenner... The Ottoman Empire decided that they had a bunch of people with names that end with the letters I-A-N. Okay, uh-huh. They had too many of them. After the distant relatives of Kylie Jenner and Kim Kardashian sabotaged the Ottoman Empire's offensive in Russia,

the Ottoman Empire decided to retaliate against them. You know how excited I was talking about Kylie Jenner today? And hold the saboteurs accountable. I came in with hours of research. I came in with bullet points. Not on my phone. I came in with hard facts. And all I'm hearing is this bullshit about the Ottoman Empire,

fucking Karl Marx. And that's it so far, I guess. Yogi has a tack board with strings attached to people's photos and they all lead to Kylie. I had to buy seven people magazines to get all these photos and cut them out. You know how hard that was in New York to get a magazine? I'm just saying, Robert Kardashian is a descendant from his great-grandparents. I guess they weren't involved in the—I think they left before the genocide. Anyway, skipping ahead, the movie Airplane debuted in 1980, where with the line,

surely you can't be serious, I am serious, and don't call me Shirley, Leslie Nielsen was propelled into megastardom as the best satirical actor. And what that led to was Naked Gun and then Naked Gun 2 1⁄2, which co-starred football player and soon-to-be comedy star and expert throat cutter O.J. Simpson. Alleged expert throat cutter. Alleged expert throat cutter. Let's get that out there, okay?

And when that alleged throat cutting happened, O.J. Simpson, he needed a fella to represent him in trial. In fact, he needed like eight. But one of them was Robert Kardashian, as portrayed by Ross from Friends. David Schwimmer. Right, David Schwimmer. When the Kardashians were contacted to ask what they thought about David Schwimmer's portrayal of their father, they couldn't be reached because they were on a break.

Yeah, I was going to say, we all remember that scene in The People vs. O.J. Simpson where David Schwimmer asks him, Juice, did you kill your ex-wife? And he says, we were on a break! Anyway, I think and then he ejaculated Kim and I think that gets us up to where we need to be. If you're listening on SoundCloud and you saw the part where we mentioned the

Armenian Genocide, make sure to leave a comment about how you love to listen to leftist podcasts that parrot CIA propaganda. Because the Armenian genocide never happened, people. I think I would like to discuss the entirety of the Kardashian-Jenner clan. I'd like to talk about how they formed their union. Originally, Chris Hudin, who would later be named Chris Kardashian. And then Kris Jenner?

Yes. She's the matriarch of the Kardashian family. The momager to end all momager. Momager. Thank you. She married Robert Kardashian and then had four kids. Kourtney,

Kim, Khloe, and Rob. These were the first four. And they are half Armenian, but had four kids, Courtney, Kim, Chloe, and Rob. Okay? These were the first four. And they are half Armenian, but Chris... And Chloe is half O.J. Simpson. Right, yes. To confirm the rumors, Courtney is not at all Armenian. She's half black.

Chris... Chloe is allegedly rumored to be O.J.'s daughter. But Chris Jenner now is Dutch, German, Irish, and Scottish. So she's a mutt of European ancestry. And then they got divorced. And then Kris Jenner married, at the time, Bruce Jenner, and now Caitlyn Jenner, a famous hero of America and patriot and star in my eye. Wait, Kole is Chloe? What?

Chloe? What? Chloe? Oh, it's just I didn't make the connection that K-H-L-O-E You've never seen Chloe spelled that way? You've never read her name out? I've read it, I just didn't know that was Chloe. That's pronounced Chloe. In fairness, Andy's research for this episode consisted

of reading several volumes of Karl Marx's Capital out loud to himself. Alright, so... Poor Seb. That's just not true. There it is. This is absolutely fucking stupid. So, Kris Kardashian... That's what I think of us skipping over Karl Marx.

God, stupid. Kris Jenner had two kids with, at the time, Bruce Jenner. Kendall and Kylie. And then Bruce Jenner... Olympic, Bruce Jenner, Kendall, and Kylie. She remarried after Rob Kardashian to Olympic athlete Bruce Jenner. And Bruce Jenner had four kids from a previous marriage, Burt, Brandon, Cassandra, and I can't even remember the fourth one. That's how bad it is.

And Kylie Jenner was born in 1997, and Keeping Up with the Kardashians came on television in 2007. So she was 10 years old when she started being on TV. So for the last, what is it, 13 years? No, 12 years, she has been on television almost every day, essentially. And Kylie Jenner has built this media fortune off of very, very few simple things. And it's mostly insecurity of how a person looks, social media fame, and seeing the mistakes of her older siblings who have failed tremendously making clothes, makeups, and sex tapes that launch their careers. In fairness, they didn't so much fail as the 16-year-old children making them in China failed.

But I did want to just kind of back up to the O.J. Simpson trial for a bit. Wait, are you saying that the Kardashians did not generate the value that they profited from? Because I have a book that goes into that. Do you? I want to hear no more of you reading a book today, Andy. Yeah, it really goes against the entire idea of our Kardashian episode. I mean, it's not so much...

To be reading an 800-page book. I read Children of Indra, the fucking bullshit book that Kylie and Kendall Ghost wrote. And trust me, if I get to read that on the pod, we're going to put all our listeners to sleep. It's not so much a book as it is a philosophy. Now, the property of a commodity... Oh, wait, no, I already read that on the pod we're gonna put all our listeners to sleep i'm just it's not so much a book as it is a philosophy now the property of a commodity and oh wait no i already read that part that'd be nice if in the sci-fi books karl marx is like the villain he's like a reanimated karl marxist sees the wealth of the kardashian clan and is now hunting them sean you had more to say on the oj tribe yeah i just so basically i, you know, everybody knows the Kardashians are famous for being famous or whatever. But, you know, so the O.J. trial is interesting because, as we've mentioned here, Rob Kardashian was O.J. Simpson's best friend.

And Rob Kardashian, actually, at the time of the murder, his law license had lapsed. So an interesting thing happens. And again, I'm not an expert on the oj trial so if you are and you're listening please correct me but from uh i watched this short little netflix documentary essentially i'll correct you because i watched the long net essentially oj allegedly commits the murders or at least on the night of the murders he gets on a plane and goes to chicago uh he comes back two days later uh he goes to his house oj simpson does uh to surrender to the police and then by this time media is there and an interesting thing happens that you can watch video of oh he just he just uneventfully went to his house to surrender to the police

yes he just he just you know uh had a nice little drive to his house to surrender to the police? Yes. He just, you know, had a nice little drive to his house to surrender to the police? Well, that came later, the runaway. That was like a week later, I think. But the thing that happens is that he flies back from Chicago. He gets out of the car. He's like speaking to the police.

And then there's media cameras everywhere so you can watch the video of this. But Robert Kardashian is standing there. And what happens is O.J. Simpson's secretary or assistant hands— Sean's making a stabbing motion with his hand right now. I'm saying this is important. O.J. Simpson's secretary hands Robert Kardashian a Louis Vuitton bag that O.J. Simpson took with him to Chicago.

Robert Kardashian, on the video, walks out of the scene with this Louis Vuitton bag never seen again yeah and the speculation is that essentially this bag he flipped it on eBay this bag was filled with OJ Simpson's bloody clothes from the night of the murder double stabbing or some piece of evidence but essentially OJ Simpson put his bloody clothes in this much more than a stabbing Louis Vuitton bag it's more like a sawing and then gave it to Robert Kardashian and then Robert Kardashian destroyed it

or disposed of it or threw it in the river or something so essentially Robert Kardashian allegedly probably destroyed evidence for OJ Simpson

and then that's set off a series of events creating the youngest self-made billionaire in history how can OJ Simpson can't burn his own clothes

well because he was taken into police custody. So you need a friend to destroy this evidence. Though I guess he could have done it in Chicago. He doesn't have like a fireplace?

Yeah, I don't know why. There's a series on Amazon Prime that was originally made for YouTube called Over My Dead Body. And the first episode is Robert Kardashian.

And it's just a guy in front of a green screen fake interviewing dead people. And Robert Kardashian talks about this,ian talks about this fake talks about this louis vuitton bag and essentially confirms that it is the bloody remains of oj's trash but so uh bob shapiro was one of oj's other attorneys apparently he came up with the scheme for robert kardashian to reactivate his law license so that uh any conversations him

and oj had would be privileged and robert privileged and Robert Kardashian wouldn't implicate himself in covering up a murder. So essentially, Robert Kardashian did basically nothing throughout the trial except chill by his friend, but he reactivated his law license so that he wouldn't expose himself to legal liability, is the theory. And then the one other part of this is that, as Andy mentioned... That's kind of the best that that's a pretty cool job it's like you just show up you don't do anything and then you show with your friend yeah yeah yeah i mean that's essentially robert kardashian in these that

watched the over my dead body thing he asked like his upbringing he's like well i had rich parents and i did a lot of drugs and then i went to college and did more drugs and then while doing more drugs i ran into oj playing tennis at a ski resort and like essentially Robert Kardashian is just in the social eye of LA you know celebrity and before he had married uh Kris Jenner was going out with Priscilla Presley so I mean Robert Kardashian even whatever you want to think about him is a dirtbag um even if he's dead I don don't really give a shit. He's a piece of shit person. Imagine covering up a double murder for the friend who

fucked your wife. Yeah, essentially. This is like how he founded House Kardashian. Right. And then the other thing is, the first, so of course, obviously in America, O.J. Simpson, trial of the century. Wait, so Rob Kardashian was already rich? Yeah, he grew up rich. Oh, okay.J. Simpson trial of the century. Wait, so Rob Kardashian was already rich? Yeah, Rob Kardashian grew up rich.

Oh, okay. This is kind of how things took off, though. Rob Kardashian sold some bullshit radio company for like $30 million. So after he got his law degree and was O.J.'s friend. I mean, you can't just be a celebrity's friend without having some sort of

backlog of money because you'd be at work all day. You know what I mean? Okay, so all the Kardashians had like several million already. Oh, yeah. a Subway's friend without having some sort of backlog of money because you'd be at work all day. You know what I mean? Okay. So all the Kardashians had like several million already. Oh, yeah. I mean, yeah. And not only that, but the connection to the Jenner family only adds to their millions because of his, you know, Wheaties, like all the money that Caitlyn Jenner had when she was, she still has it now that she's,

you get what I'm fucking trying to say. All right. Listen, for the listeners, I'm going to say Bruce Jenner from time to time. Oh, because she swang fast. I'm not, no, she ran fast. No that she's... You get what I'm fucking trying to say. All right, listen, for the listeners, I'm going to say Bruce Jenner from Have You Time. Oh, because she swam fast. No, she ran fast. No, I thought she was a swimmer. No, she ran.

No, she's a runner. Oh. Andy, you don't know shit about Karl Marx. She's a middle-distance runner, dude. Well, she certainly wasn't a driver. Listen, she was not charged for woman slaughter, and that's what counts. That's what makes sense, ladies and gentlemen.

But, okay, so Andy mentioned the chase that O.J. Simpson does with the police. So what happens there is that Robert Kardashian is first. The Kardashian name first gets publicity where Robert Kardashian holds the press conference and reads what is supposedly O.J.'s suicide note. Because originally O.J. was making a run for it, supposedly going to kill himself. And Robert Kardashian calls this press conference and reads his friend's suicide note. And then, of course, he's there at the trial,

and people are actually like, every day when he enters the courtroom, somebody shouts at him, where's the bag, Robert? So it's like, this is where the Kardashian name really becomes famous. And then Kris Jenner, his now ex-wife, is smart enough that she, gears turn in her head and she figures out how to monetize this.

Yeah, they got divorced in 91. So it was over 10 years before Robert Kardashian eventually passed away due to cancer. But in 2007, Keeping Up With The Kardashians was produced by John Murray, who did all of the like real world road rules. And, uh, one of the former contestants, Tanya, put out like a sexual abuse, uh, rape court case against him. And, uh, she lost on that. But, uh.

I wonder, I wonder if he has anything in common with, uh, other people who produced Keeping Up With The Kardashians? Now, now, Now, how did... Particularly Mr. Seacrest. How did the Kardashians come into public... What made Kim come into the public eye? Well, she was Paris Hilton's assistant. She would help her shop,

and then she was in this relationship with Brandy's younger brother. I don't know if you guys know this person. Is this Raymond? Raymond J. Yes, Raymond J. And there was a... Popular PlayStation video game series.

It was very weird to watch Kim have sex with a cartoon character. I guess we can't use any Ray J music. Oh, no. But I do have Rap God loaded up. The diss track by Eminem. We I do have Rap God loaded up. The diss track by Eminem. We literally can't play either of those.

I don't know what you're referring to here. Okay, I'll just go back to Pockabell's Canon then. And he's like, you know what? I guess in that case I'll just read some more

of this book that I have. At this time, Ryan C. Crist is contacted by Chris Cartgenner, and they want to produce a reality TV show. The Simple Life with Paris Hilton had just... Ryan Seacrest, Me Too survivor.

Me Too career survivor. You know, say what you will about him, but he works hard. I just want to say... I'm quoting Chris Hardwick. Wow. One thing that bothers the shit about me, I mean, like,ris hardwick and ryan secret feminism go on yeah it no i look that i think what the me too movement has really taught

us is like whose pr firms are really worth the money yeah sure because like so like the lesson with ryan seacrest is like if you're in trouble hire his pr firm or just have that much power right right and you know for those who don't know, just he was groping and sexually harassing his stylist. And then when she wouldn't sleep with him, he got the company to fire her and then smeared her in the press and retaliated against her in a lawsuit. Ryan Seacrest is a piece of shit if you didn't know, ladies and gentlemen.

And he's still on TV and American Idol and all this shit. So it's like, you know, it's all about power and money at the end of the day. Yeah, but if you think about how much value he adds to the economy. Okay. It just annoys me because it's like, you see this with, what's his face, Chris Hardwick too. Like all the woke celebrities. You can think of all the value he adds to the economy.

Oh, you mean the skinny white dudes that get paid to announce the show we're already watching? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm pretty sure they're pieces of shit. But it's like, like you know like all sorts of people like what's his face the it was devastating to me because I don't watch Walking Dead but I love Talking Dead

it just annoys me where it's like people will like front on Twitter and just call out somebody as an abuser because they have less power with them and act like a hero but it's like of course you know if Chris Hardwick butters your fucking bread you're gonna keep your mouth shut because you know you're ron funches oh shit we got the ron funches diss of the day it just bothered me it's like you know if you want to be a principal defender like open your mouth when it's actually going to cost you money, not just when it's free to do so.

We're going to do the collect them all of now famous former Portland comedians. Oh, no. Yogi's shaking his head. He's cutting this in post. I know. I'm keeping all of this. And Carmel, watch your back. Anyway.

Carmel is nice and to my knowledge has not covered up for an abuser. Yet. Are you saying this because he's white? He's Jewish, Andy, and Jewish people aren't white. So let's not insult him. If we've learned one thing from the Bernie Sanders campaign. So in 2007, Keeping Up with the Kardashians is produced. It makes the sex tape scandal that Kim Kardashian deals with.

We should mention it's mostly believed that the mother, Kris Jenner, leaked the sex tape on purpose. Oh, really? I mean, again, we don't have confirmation. But that is an interesting thing where another thing with Kris Jenner, we've mentioned she's the matriarch. She takes like a 10% manager cut of all her kids' earnings. So I don't know if she technically leaked it, but what she did do is once it was leaked, it went to a production company

and then they did cut a deal where they would make $5 million for it to be released. Was she just going through Kim's VHS collection and was like, oh, I know what'll... Have you guys seen the tape? Yeah. Nice. No.

Oh, wow. Jeffrey's the pure virgin on the show. I'd just like to clarify that Jeffrey is not a virgin. He is pure. And he is the only single member of Grub Stakers, ladies. That's right. Yeah. Not tied down.

He's not tied down. No ball and chain for him. Yeah. I'll tell you. Just two balls and a big old chain. Yeah. Come on. high five. So once she's on TV at 10 years old,

she essentially gets to see all of her older sisters and siblings go through reality TV show highs and lows, whether it's marrying and divorcing and having kids and so on and so forth. And Kylie Jenner, the youngest of the Kardashian-Jenner crew, kind of learns from everyone's successes and mistakes, and from that builds an immense social media platform and a cosmetics company, which is now valued at $900 million, soon to be a billion or is a billion.

The issue is that she's essentially selling trash that other cosmetic companies make, but hers is valued more because it's got her name on it. Right. The company's Kylie Cosmetics, and she's the 100% owner. Right. And the company only has between 8 to 13 full-time employees, and then everyone else is a contractor.

It has absurdly low operating costs. Right. Right. Well, it's hard to find any information at all about its costs, but yeah. Yeah, do you want to go to Stephen? You were doing some research. Yeah, well, so the company Kelly Cosmetics is reportedly worth about $900 million in that Forbes article.

Andy's like, Steve, that's interesting, but I was doing some research, and this book I was reading has an interesting section on what you're getting at. I mean, I wasn't going to mention it, but now that you mention it, Sean, they constitute the material content of... Shut the fuck up, Andy.

Shut the fuck up, Andy. In the form of society to be considered here, they're also the material bearers, brackets, of exchange value. Oh, interesting. Jeffries? So as I was saying... All that and more.

The Jenner- kardashian family and also the shadowy cosmetics incubator company called seed beauty uh helped fund the initial capital for kylie cosmetics and also her mom is the cfo of k Oh, really? She receives that 10% management fee. Gotcha. And so this company was started in 2015. And from that time until now, from all the reports I can find that Forbes said they used, it looks like they've earned about $1.08 billion in gross revenue. And in that same time, the company's net worth, the company's net worth, yeah,

has gone to $900 million. And that's just like, basically, it's almost to the point that it's like thermodynamically impossible for her to have made that, for her to have gained that wealth from the company in that time period for a cosmetics company

in the year of our Lord, so so because like the average the average company in the cosmetics industry so like if if we're to believe forbes numbers um they have an 85 gross profit margin above their costs and the industry standard is more like 60 to like a very high case of 80 percent right and at the same time um like this is a private company so it's very hard to find any regular reporting on their financial they don't release any financial statements true practically speaking and there's no information really on their costs. All you have to go on is this revenue number that Forbes says, like, yeah,

it's $900 million valuation based off that. Well, they used a really unrealistic multiplier for their revenue that you wouldn't see any other private cosmetics company use it three times. But, like, the industry standard is closer to two times for 2018. So it's just her branding, though, that they're adding into it to multiply, you think?

I think it's got to just be her brand plus just goodwill for the company. Through social media. I mean, the thing is that no other cosmetic company has the 125 million Instagram followers. That's true. Or Twitter followers. The only, like, the only counter to that, I would say, is that, like, two of her sisters

also have cosmetics companies. Right, right. And they don't, they sadly don't enjoy the same profit margins. Well, and this is what I want to bring up now, is because the entire appeal with Kylie Jenner is that she has accessorized black people in her life to make it to she can blend in culturally appropriate without feeling like she is doing anything wrong by stealing ideas and being who she is which we'll discuss more in a moment we might have lost you on the misgendering thing but we'll win you back on our complaints about cultural appropriation

now is it possible that uh Kylie Jenner is is buying these cosmetics on Alibaba and then in the style of a good Kickstarter flipping it by stamping her name on it? I've been listening to a lot of your Kickstarter sucks. Yeah. Well, that would honestly, that's like a plausible scenario for the. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Suck it, Yogi and Sean.

She's buying them off Alibaba. No, it's made in Oxnard, California. Yeah, maybe that's just a shipping port. If the business model was outright fraud, I'd be like, yeah, okay, this valuation works. Have you opened the door and looked inside their cosmetics factory? There's video of the sweatshops

that is essentially the location that is the Oxnard, California place. The Chinese government won't let you. The Chinese location we don't know, but the Oxnard, California location does have class store reviews and you know what's crazy? All the reviews, some of them are clearly people, employees being like, it's a great place.

But all of them are like, the con is it's too hot. Put air conditioning in there. You're in California, but that is a part of billionaires. They won't increase the comfortability of their bottom line for any reason. Do you know how much electricity an air conditioner uses? Do you know how much money a billion dollars is? I would argue that Kylie is fighting global warming.

They're Green New Deal compliant. You're right. So between 2007 and now. Wait, wait. I think, Steve, you had one more thing about the valuation, that it's similar to a previous entrepreneur who burst on the scene. So I got done reading that Forbes article. I'm like, this seems like another out-of-nowhere innovator I've learned of.

Who is it? Holmes. Elizabeth Holmes. Elizabeth Holmes from Theranos. Theranos. And who I think they're just, like in Theranos' case, she got to a billion from outside private equity capital, their money being just shoveled her way.

So you're saying that these companies that have white female CEOs are being overvalued over these CEOs that are male? This is International Women's Day. It just happened, ladies and gentlemen. Armenians are POC. Kylie Jenner's not Armenian. She's just white. She's Armenian adjacent. She's not.

Regardless of what the gender of the innovator is, it does make her a great American Horatio Alger story. I'll say this. Of a billionaire, come out of nowhere innovator who did it all self-made. I'll say this. Theranos and Kylie might be overvalued,

but black turtlenecks are undervalued. Yeah. All right, so I'm going to briefly go through Kylie Jenner's relationship, and it does apply to what we're talking about here. In 2000, I think it's 14, her sister Kendall turned 16, and on Super Sweet 16, the television show... Her sister and fellow sci-fi author.

Yes. The musician, the rapper Tyga performed at the Super Sweet 16, and this was the beginning of the relationship between Tyga and, at the time, 14-year-old Kylie Jenner. Tyga is a pedophile. Tyga and I, incidentally, have the same birthday. Also, he owes his career to DJ Mustard. That's right. Because he's a trash rapper and Rack City was only a hit because it's a DJ Mustard beat.

So Tyga is 29 now and Kylie Jenner is 21. So you can do the math on how much of a pedophile he truly is. But Tyga at one point was uh with black china and he had a daughter with her andy shut up andy shut the fuck up you've interrupted too much shut the fuck up andy um the forbes multiplier of their ages we do not think it's accurate i guess yogi can say you can do the math but he doesn't mean it you can do the math, but he doesn't mean it. You can do the math in your head. So Tyga and Blac Chyna had a daughter. And then Tyga left Blac Chyna to be with Kylie Jenner, but not be with her because she was underage at the time.

And throughout her, before she turned 18, Tyga had bought her like a Maybach and a Ferrari. Like, yeah, he gave her a whole bit of shit and she made a billion dollars, which is very funny to me. That Tyga probably had to dig deep in his bank accounts to afford these cars for Kylie Jenner. He's like, these will be great as soon as you get your driver's license, Kylie. Right, right, right. The relationship with Tyga never truly materializes. They're on again and off again. And then eventually Kylie Jenner ends up with Travis Scott. It does materialize in the sense that Tyga commits statutory rape multiple times.

So Tyga. And should be in prison. That's right, Tyga commits statutory rape multiple times. So Tyga... And should be in prison. That's right, Tyga. We are calling you out. This is your Me Too moment. So Travis Scott... Kid City, bitch. Kid Kid City, bitch.

And Kylie Jenner have a child named Stormy. S-T-O... I'm fucking children. Children. Fucking children. Children. They have a Travis Scott

and Kyle Jenner I'm only using two keys on this yeah oh I know you're not using your drops at all Andy we've talked about this multiple

times I'm just using okay I'll use the other ones thank you expended all the brain power reading Karl Marx

I haven't heard half the keys Kylie Jenner and Travis Scott have a kid named Stormy. S-T-O-R-M-I. Oh, she's been in the news, right? Stormy?

Yeah. Yeah, because Travis Scott... Shut up, Peter. Kylie trademarks... She's doing stand-up now. That's right. Kylie Jenner trademarks Stormy's name. I'm very mad about it.

What are you mad about? I'm just saying that just because you had sex with the president doesn't entitle you to play the chuckle bucket in wherever the fuck Nebraska. That's for hardworking road comics who spend years working out their women be shopping material. Listen, babies need to do stand-up. So Kylie Jenner trademarks her daughter's name S-T-O-R-M-I after she tried to trademark

her own name Kylie, but then Kylie Minogue said, fuck that noise, Kylie's my name. But the reason I bring this up is Tyga is trying to get a birth test with Stormy because Tyga claims he's the actual father

of Travis Scott and Kylie Jenner's baby. And Ryan Seacrest is not giving up emails to Black China, Black China suing, keeping over the card, Ryan Seacrest over emails about a whole bunch of shit because Black China decided to date Rob Kardashian

as a revenge because Tyga broke up with her early on as well. I don't need you to make a chart. Well, Andy, if you were fucking listening, you wouldn't need a chart. The reason I bring this all up because... You've made a great choice to work for Walmart. Because Tyga says one thing in an interview that is very good. He claimed that Kylie Jenner needed black people to fuck with her

to make the money she made. She needed the validation of the black community. Tyga said this, yeah. Tyga needed the validation of the black community to be successful. You need black people to fuck with you because you need culture. I had a lot to do with that. Now, fuck Tyga. He's a terrible piece of person.

However, Kylie Jenner's success does come from appropriating black culture and stealing ideas when it comes to her designs for Kylie Jenner Cosmetics and the logos for her company. And really, the sad is is that she can get away with it because no artist has enough capital to challenge this she stole how her products look in the designs the logos on them even this shirt company she started with Kendall Jenner where they essentially just put band tees and then their own faces on it. Like, imagine you had the ego to be like, oh, I love this shirt. It says the Ramones on it, but let's put my face on it as well, and then let's sell that to people for $40 a pop.

By the way, Grubstakers has incorporated. We are Grubstakers LLC, and we will be selling Ramones shirts with our faces on them. Yeah, look for our Billionaires Are Parasites merch coming soon, after which we will all be desperately attempting to go viral every second of every day.

There's a great article. We also have ACDC, where our faces are the letters. There's a great article written by Tiffany White on distractify.com. Mind you, I want the listeners to know that I had to dig through fucking 80 pages of Blac Chyna, Tyga, and Travis Scott drama to find any of this information.

Because Travis Scott and Kylie Jenner are on the rocks because Travis Scott is DMing people on Instagram. And then he decided to delete his account and Kylie Jenner's pissed at him. And so she, and there's also another person, person Jordan Woods who like lived with Kylie for a little bit and all she did was take photos of Kylie Jenner for Instagram and then she had a line in the cosmetics and Kylie Jenner to be to to piss her off decided to sell those cosmetics at half off and all the other ones remain the same price so listen there's a whole bunch of petty drama going on with Kylie Jenner cosmetics should Should we cancel Kylie Jenner for supporting the Nazi anthem Blitzkrieg Bop? With her Ramones t-shirts?

I am glad that this is the episode Andy Palmer learned what black China is. I still don't know. She's a stripper and she had Tyga's baby. That's right. Oh, okay. And then Rob Kardashian posted revenge porn of her and alleged she was cheating and she got a restraining order. I've never felt older than I do right now. I just thought it was like, you know, modern dishware.

I'm only interacting with boomers on Facebook. You're like, I've got a gray table. I'm having people over for my condo dinner party. I'm going to bring out my black china. And the makeup she sells is terrible. There was a customer who had bought some of it, and they'd found ants inside of it. And there was a whole bunch of customers that have been like, I bought this this from you and then it didn't show like it just wasn't in the package like right the companies run very poorly did they charge extra for the ants no they gave those for

free but you know it's crazy that person emailed the company three times and then they ignored her and so she put on instagram and then they're like oh we'll help you out um and kylie jenner importantly if you give her money to do a paid advertisement post on Instagram, she'll charge... I want you to get her from Grubstakers. We have to pay her a million dollars to do that. We should take out a loan together. Is that a sliding scale?

Maybe, I don't know. But there's a great article written by Laura Hanam off Yahoo News. Kylie Jenner earns the average UK salary in two hours. That is how much money she makes. Kylie Jenner, actually, she wanted to get Woody Allen's character

from Ants in her makeup. It's Aunt Z. So how old did you say you are, Kylie? I used to raise my wife. My stepdaughter and I, we have an arrangement. The arrangement wasn't the marriage. That was an arraignment.

Wait, so if we took out, you think we could convince a bank to give us a million dollars for our corporation to just buy one Kylie Jenner Instagram post to promote Grubb Staker's Patreon. Andy, you're describing the story of Fyre Festival. Yeah, but it's going to work when we do it. We'll suck the dick. But yeah, like it's alleged.

Yeah, like Yogi said, that they get a million dollars for an Instagram post. And if you watch that Fyre Festival documentary, like Kendall Jenner was the other city. Which one? Either of them. The Motivators or whatever? Yeah, Kendall Jenner posted Fyre Festival on Instagram. And there's actually, they're tied up in lawsuits about this because, of course, Fyre Festival was a fraud. So if they have any responsibility to check the things that they're promoting.

Are we all wet, Andy? You didn't go? You didn't go wet You didn't come with? No, wait. So does this mean that Fuck Jerry's good or bad? It's crazy how Fuck Jerry's name is Fuck Jerry, and yet when people post it by, they're like, fuck, fuck Jerry.

And it's like, just say this is a bad company. Well, I watched the Netflix documentary that they produced, so I think they're good. And I watched the Hulu documentary, so I think it's millennials' fault. So one of the Kylie Jenner cosmetics contains carmine, which is that bug that we grind up to make shit red, whether it's yogurt or fucking Pop-Tarts or, in this case, cosmetics. Also Tony Soprano's life. And I was reading an article

and it said that it takes 70,000... It was so sad how Eddie Falco got ground up to make Kylie Jenner's makeup. She was talking to the FBI. It takes 70,000 of these bugs to make one pound of this red dye, basically. And people have been using this bug to make this dye since, like, the Aztecs.

It's been around for a very long time. But the issue is that we're dealing with an environmental crisis of insects going away. 50% of all insects are on a decline, and it is a catastrophe waiting to happen. And you might think, oh, I don't care about insects. Well, you like red shit

because you won't be eating it anytime soon because everyone's fucking using it on their goddamn lips for Kylie Jenner cosmetics and the only reason she's making so much fucking money is because Instagram's

a parasite on society and it's insecurities that are embedded in children, male or female, it doesn't matter at this point, that are making it that she's this popular. So essentially what she's done

is become a leech on society's weakest individuals and made them overpay for products that nobody really cares for to appeal cool to make millions of dollars on a post. And when she was found out that she's a billionaire, she said, it's a nice pat on the back. Fuck you, Kylie Jenner. Fuck you.

Nobody should eat your ass. If I may play devil's advocate here, it sounds like even though she is partially responsible for the massacre of carmine insects, it also sounds like she is making a more sustainable lateral transition

to using ants instead. No. It's so sad that Armenians take out their genetic trauma on insects but essentially the worst part of it i think is the fact that kylie jenner is essentially doing a new age minstrel show by parading herself in black culture garb and facial features to appeal to the masses. I mean, a lip filler is just larger lips. And I don't know, if she decides to get a tan, is that not painting her face black?

I mean, the reality is that the Kardashian crew understands that to be successful in society and in social media, a white person is not nearly as popular as a black person. And they're exploiting that to the nth degree. And listen, you know, some people are going to talk about like, well, they had so many good things with that friend Jonathan on the show being a gay person and Caitlyn Jenner and how that was handled. And you know what, as much social justice as you might think comes from the Kardashian crew. I mean, it was good that they had Jonathan on the show show being a gay person why do you why do you think that andy because you know he was he was there he was being a gay person i mean you know what's crazy andy like so i know

about how like like how much of this trash is syndicated around the world because i used to watch it when i would be in india and so it's not like you know we look at it like oh some people watch this trash but it's been on since 2007 and it's probably never going away. And they make $500,000 per episode of the Kardashian show at this point. Is it still on? It's still on, yeah. And they, then like, and Ryan Seacrest has produced several spinoffs. Khloe and Kourtney take New York, take Miami.

The reality is, is that to make- Khloe and Kourtney take their hairstylist. I mean, Ryan Seacrest has profited off being a producer on some of the worst trash ever. And Larry King had like a... Profited off of being the hardest working man in show business. Larry King had like a... Celebrities and leaders of the world come and have dinner at my house and Larry King being a great interviewer

and I respect him a lot asked the entire room hey incidentally Larry King Tyga and I have the same birthday he asked everyone in the room everyone in the room hey what's your proudest moment and Ryan Seacrest said you guys know the Kardashians that's my proudest achievement and

fuck you Ryan Seacrest like you think making the Kardashians, that's my proudest achievement. And fuck you, Ryan Seacrest. You think making the Kardashians as popular as they are today is a good achievement in the world? You think the world, knowing that this crew exists, is worthy of them having $1.8 billion between them?

Fuck you. Sounds like someone hates New Year. When Yogi was going through his rant about how the Kardashians are leeches, I wish he Yogi... Sounds like someone hates New Year. When Yogi was going through his rant about how the Kardashians are leeches, I wish he just started going into a general thing about Armenians and endorsing the genocide. Listen, all I know is these Armenians are fucking everything up.

And they ruined the offensive against Russia that the Ottoman Empire was undertaking, so they had to be resettled. You don't understand. They were saboteurs with dual loyalty. I mean, explain this. undertaking so they had to be resettled you don't understand what everyone's thinking tours with dual loyalty i mean explain this uh the british and australians who had a uh far superior military to russia um they at uh gallipoli were just shredded to pieces but for some reason the ottomans couldn't get their machine guns up to

russia yeah to uh to take out those mud people i say sabotage oh my god mud people you fucking what are we not allowed to be racist against russians now they they rigged our election well all right that's how you if that's how you feel andy we said cultural appropriation is bad so it cancels out uh but i did want to get to something that we did mention, two things. First, one is working conditions, the makeup. I think we've talked about this, but just generally the arc is that in 2015, Kylie Jenner launches these lip kits, and these are really what makes her a supposed billionaire. It's now called Kylie Cosmetics.

But an interesting thing that happened in 2016, a blogger, this is from the Distractify article Yogi mentioned, in 2016, a blogger compared the ingredients of Kylie's lip kits with ColourPop, or lipsticks with ColourPop, a similar makeup company owned by the same parent company, Seed Cosmetics. The blogger came to the conclusion that the lipsticks with color pop a similar makeup company owned by the same parent company seed cosmetics the blogger came to the conclusion that the lipsticks were identical except color pop's lipsticks only cost six dollars while kylie's cost five times that right like thirty dollars so basically yeah they're paying the same or they're saying they're paying six times as much

for the same product because it is kylie's name on it and like she's bragged about like i'm working so hard to make this product for my fans but like there's one article in that one of the things that distracts i think mentioned is that some of the cosmetics have been giving people headaches and like migraines and nausea and so they're literally selling trash i mean you know they they they look at a fucking empty burger king wrapper and go oh let me take an instagram photo with it and then suddenly everyone wants to buy on on eBay for thousands of dollars. Like, it's literally that stupid. But I think that, you know, Travis Scott deleted his Instagram

because he's been DMing random hoes on the side, apparently. And I love that he thinks that Kylie Jenner can't. Would you say birds in the traps? Yes, yes, precisely. I love that Travis Scott thinks Kylie Jenner can't call up Instagram and be like, hey, can I see Travis Scott's DMs? Because I've got 130 million followers and I think we both know how much money

I make for you guys. I love having the support of real billionaires. Yes, yes. And then just like another thing, we did mention this, but I do kind of want to finish out this part of the story, which is the working conditions at Spatz Labs. And this is the one in california again we yeah oxnard california we

don't know what happens in in uh nanking china um but essentially so this is from radar online and also distractify it's great nothing bad happened in nanking uh but so spats laboratories it exposes the workers to chemicals, low pay. They don't get health care. They have no benefits for health care. So it's like early, according to one, I believe this is an Indeed.com review, early morning shifts, long hours. You read, was only provided with a lab coat, hairnet, and safety glasses. No benefits.

The turnover rate was high. I love that I could see how makeup was made from start to finish, but the downfall is that the makeup particles make me cough and sick. So this is in California. They're exposing their workers to these horrific conditions, so we can only imagine what's going on in China. And then the other thing

is that... California, here we come, right back where we started from. is that the last time the fda actually the last time that the fda actually inspected this factory glass we did it better the last time the fda inspected this factory was back in 2006 and they got a variety of issues from radar online the fda the inspector found that quote the batch production and control records do not include a statement of issues is from Radar Online. The FDA, the inspector found that, quote, the batch production and control records do not include a statement of the actual yield and percentages of theoretical

yield. Batch production and control records do not include complete labeling control records. That's how you get fucking ants in your shit. And then they claimed equipment is not is used in the manufacture, equipment used in the manufacture, processing, packing or holding of drug products is not of appropriate manufacture, equipment used in the manufacture, processing, packing, or holding of drug products

is not of appropriate design, of adequate size, and suitably located to facilitate operations for its intended use. Now when they say theoretical yield, are they talking like string theory? But then...

I guess the politically correct term is M-theory. But so some rep for the company told Radar Online, quote, the factory is not regulated by the FDA and has not been inspected since. So the last time the FDA looked at this, they found all these violations. But I mean, again, it's just kind of horrible if that's what they're doing in California.

Imagine what they're doing in China. This is my prediction. Done. Yeah. No, it doesn't look bad in my imagination. This is my prediction. The reality is that in an interview, they ask Kylie Jenner what she thinks of her older sisters

and how her pregnancy compares to Kim's, and she's like, she's over 30. I don't believe in life over 30. And this Kardashian saga will end poorly at one point. America, I think... I'm already fading away like Marty in Back to the Future. Kylie Jenner. Her arm's disappearing.

Oh no, I'm 31. Kylie Jenner is like, yeah, once you turn 31, every time your friends are trying to have a conversation with you, you just start reading out of Karl Marx's Capital Volume 1 and really just boring everybody to death with non sequiturs. I really do think that...

Nuts. God damn it. No, I could have landed it. Sean, get your fucking Canadian European edition out of our American show. I could have won the exchange if I just used a different word.

Well, it's funny you mention exchange. Exchange value appears first of all as the quantitative relation, the proportion which use values of one kind exchange for use values of another kind. And then there's a footnote for six. Value consists in the exchange relation

between one thing and another between a given amount of one product and a given amount of another. We've gone over the exchange value of Kylie Jenner, but what's the use value? There was one other thing I wanted to get to, and then I'm out of stuff. But essentially, we've talked about, particularly on the Walton family

on part two, we talked a lot about sweatshop labor, and you know, this is a really horrifying thing we all don't think about, but of course, the Kardashian empire was partly built on sweatshop labor. Someone got mad at us on the Walton episode because I suggested that they all fuck each other. So I will not imply that the Kardashians all fuck each other. I just want to say that for the record.

Well, you know what's crazy? There's a bigger chance that the Kardashians fuck each other more than the Waltons. You're saying that. I'm not. That is not my official take. They all have fucked someone that's fucked another one of them. But basically, according to both Radar Online and the group... It's like that STD thing.

We're not saying it, but we're not saying it. Everyone you've had sex with, you've also had sex with everyone they've had sex with. Seven degrees to STDs. Yeah. I think that's just someone trying to really inflate their numbers. So, according to Radar Online and the group China Labor Watch, the Kardashian family's high-end K-Dash Kardashian label, the Kris Jenner collection, and then a couple other shoe dazzle. These are all Kardashian companies, all manufactured in areas of China with government regulations are ignored. Workers subject to inhumane conditions. And then according to this, there were often 16 year old employees who Tyga is attempting to date now.

But so there would be 16 year old employees at these these factories and then just like one brief description the sweatshop workers live in squalid factory-run dormitories filled with the stench of sewage while toiling up to 84 hours during a seven-day work week i believe they make like 15 a week or something or one dollar a day oh so they won the fight for $15. And then one more description of these working conditions. Quote, you can't talk during working hours. You can't listen to music. You can't stand up and stretch.

You can't even put your head up and look around or you will be screamed at. If you get permission to use the toilet, you get four minutes. If you're highly specialized, you cannot even go to the bathroom. And these are the conditions in China that the Kardashian products are made in. That sounds like a description of the Klobuchar 2020. Now, wait, wait.

They cannot go to the bathroom, or they may not go to the bathroom? If they're highly specialized, they cannot go to the bathroom, but otherwise they have to ask permission and they get four minutes. So they physically cannot go to the bathroom. Yeah. Their butts and genitals are

sewn shut and to get unsewn, they have to talk to a supervisor. Oh, that seems tedious. It's very good for productivity. It's sewn shut to keep Tyga out. Of the urethra? And with that... is there anything else no

there's nothing else let's go out on that I think this is the time we close this episode ladies and gentlemen alright well you're welcome

for not subjecting you to a four parter on the Kardashians yes of course and with that this has been Grubstakers my name is Yogi Paiwal I'm Andy Palmer Steve Jeffries I'm Sean P. McCarthy rest in peace And with that, this has been Grubstakers. My name is Yogi Paiwal.

I'm Andy Palmer. Steve Jeffries. I'm Sean P. McCarthy. Rest in peace to the man, the myth, the legend, the billionaire who died during penis surgery. Ehud Air Laniata, age 65. You did all of that work and then didn't remember his name? You couldn't just memorize one dude's name? I was working on Pocket Bell's can. Hey, I was working

hard on this beautiful music that you're listening to right now. Speaking of people who have made money off Blood Diamonds, I hope Pat Robertson gets dick surgery soon. You know what's really sad is that Lonnie Otto never got to experience that big dick.

That's true. He never got to age 69 either. That's totally true. All right, we'll have a new episode next week. Thank you very much. Bye.