Gutfeld! Monologues - 2024: A Year Of Political Comedy

Episode Date: December 27, 2024

As seen on Gutfeld!, Comedian Joe Machi argues that if you reflect on 2024, some of the year's most turbulent events were actually hilarious.   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Tucker Carlson said Ray Dalio is one of the world's smartest investors, but more important, he's likely the wisest. Make yourself read this book. That book is how countries go broke, the big cycle. In it, Dalio explains the mechanics behind big debt cycles, and what they mean for countries with big and increasing debts like the U.S. and what you should do to protect yourself. You can find it wherever books are sold,

or read a five-minute summary of the book at economic principles.org. Thank you so much, Mackie, All right. Thank you, Jackie, Jackie, Jackie, thank you so much, everybody. Good evening, and Merry Christmas, everyone. I'm Joe Mackey, filling in for Greg on this special. edition of Gutfeld. It's Boxing Day in many countries

where bosses treat their staves and those less fortunate to gifts. That's why Greg is still on paternity leave. Now that Christmas is over, everyone's focused on New Year's. This afternoon, for instance, a Venezuelan gang member counted backwards from 10 before taking myself home.

After a 40-year break, Joel Kola is making a comeback with Triple the Cathay content. It's so jam-packed with caffeine that when President Biden took a sip, his heart actually started beating. CNN is finishing 2024 with the lowest audience numbers in the network's history in the 25 to 54-year-old demo. There's talk of layoffs and pay cuts, and in fact, Christian Amman Poor changed her name to Christian really freaking poor. New Jersey residents are reporting questionable odors and tastes from their tap water.

Also exhibiting questionable odors and tastes, New Jersey residents. Fair enough. Jenna Bush Hager announced on the Today Show that she doesn't wear panties. That makes her the second morning talk show host to admit to going commando. MSNBC's Lawrence O'Donnell says the next tunnel underneath the Hudson River should be named after Joe Biden. Well, he's not the only Democrat who can't wait until the old man is underground. So, now that everyone has unwrapped their Christmas gifts, eaten their fill of turtle doves and argue with their families,

it's time to come together and share something everyone can agree on. Watching Fox News. Just kidding, just kidding. We'll be back with more Gutfeld. Mint is still $15 a month for premium wireless. And if you haven't made the switch yet, here are 15 reasons why you should. One, it's $15 a month.

Two, seriously, it's $15 a month. Three, no big contracts. Four, I use it. Five, my mom uses it. Are you playing me off? That's what's happening, right? Okay, give it a try at mintmobile.com slash switch. Up front payment of $45 for three-month plan, $15 per month equivalent required.

New customer offer first three months only, then full-price plan options available. Taxes and fees extra. See mintmobile.com. Some people think nature is like this, but actually it's like this. That's why Columbia engineers everything we make for anything nature can throw at you. Columbia, engineered for whatever. Anyway, most of us are related to someone still gullible enough to tune in to MSNBC. Shout out to Mary Trump.

But these days, it's hard to imagine there was a time not so long ago when there were ideals the vast majority of Americans agreed on. There was the easy stuff like country music and rap shouldn't be combined. Kale is best left as a garnish and should never throw a surprise party for a 90-year-old. And if you do, put out a tarpurs. Heck, even Greg Gutfeld didn't wear a white thong past Labor Day. Remember, boss, taking all your clothes off at the beach doesn't make it a nude beach. Then there were the important beliefs we share that kept our culture from falling into chaos. Belief in meritocracy being a good thing.

Censorship is wrong, and assassinating people you don't like is not okay. But these days, our culture is fractured. Significant slices of the population have abandoned bedrock beliefs in exchange for the notion that any end can justify any mean. For instance, after health care CEO Brian Thompson was murdered in cold blood, a survey found that four and ten young people found the killing acceptable. So those people co-signed being judge, jury, and executioner. Imagine the maxim that thinking creates.

Murder is justifiable any time you don't. don't like how a business is run. Who gets to decide some spoiled brat with back pain and a unibrow? If that's how you rationalize an action, consider where that might lead. A bartender makes money serving alcohol to someone who drives drunk.

Kill him. A lawyer profits off defending a drunk driver. Kill him. A hitman kills lawyers that defend drunk drivers. Hire a different hitman and kill him. Pretty soon the entire country is Baltimore, or Chicago, or an Eagles game. So instead of looking at the point of view of murderers, maybe we should take a page out of Trump's book. His Christmas messages to 37 inmates who had their death row sentences commuted by President Biden,

go to hell! That's perfect! The only thing could have made it better, is if he would have said, go to hell and say hello to Woodrow Wilson for me. League of Nations. Bottom line, there's a stunning lack of forethought and empathy from liberals who want to recreate the social contract.

In a way, ethics are a quid pro quo. I don't support censorship because I don't want to be censored. I don't support murder because I don't want to be murdered. Many of the values we hold came from religion. I believe in the Ten Commandments, because I believe they came from God. But that's not the only reason they're valid. Society crumbles when people lie, steal, and murder.

It's important that we remember there are some things that are absolutely right and some things that are absolutely wrong. Not all ideas are created equally, morally, or practically. That's why no one ever says nations experiencing tyranny or lawlessness are doing well. They say, I'm glad I voted for Trump this time. Listen ad-free with a Fox News podcast plus subscription on Apple Podcasts. And Amazon Prime members can listen to this show ad-free on the Amazon music app. This is Jimmy Phala, inviting you to join me for Fox Across America,

where we'll discuss every single one of the Democrats' dumb ideas. Just kidding. It's only a three-hour show. Listen live at noon Eastern or get the podcast at foxacrossamerica.com.