Gutfeld! Monologues - Actor Ed Norton Demands ICE Out of Minnesota

Episode Date: January 29, 2026

As seen on Gutfeld!, the Patriots’ head coach is willing to sacrifice what to win a super bowl? Meanwhile, actor Ed Norton is demanding a national economic strike to force ICE out of Minnesota.  Greg delivers the explosive commentary you won’t want to miss! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

It's good to see me too. Good evening, everyone. So Patriots head coach Mike Vrable said he would cut off his own penis to win a Super Bowl. A Super Bowl. In a related story, J.B. Pritzker said he'd do the same for a burrito bowl. A burrito bowl. Hmm, delicious. A broken sewer pipe has left the Potomac River with 12,000 times the limit of E. coliolone.

which causes intense diarrhea. While people have reported symptoms, life went on as usual for one man, because he has it every day. Do I have to explain these jokes to everybody? A Kenyan activist broke a Guinness World record by hugging a tree for 72 consecutive hours. I believe we have a picture.

Which one's the tree? Well, one of them has wood. Yeah. Are you sure? California reportedly received millions of dollars to provide foe and internet for 94,000 dead people. To be fair, they were alive when they called for service. Because, you know, you're always on hold these jokes.

Kanye West is now blaming his hatred of Jews on an undiagnosed brain injury. Why was it undiagnosed? Well, he didn't want to go see a Jewish doctor. A Georgia State rep filed a resolution to rename the Sauni Mountains after President Trump. Oh, yeah. Sit out, everybody. To be fair, they also want to rename Death Valley after this guy. That got him on their feet.

Now you're cooking with oil kids. Jimmy Kimmel cried on his show Monday while talking about Minneapolis. We don't know if he was sincere, but so he was sincere, but he's not. sources say before he took the stage, he'd been reading his ratings. And finally, a new report shows that men who get busted sleeping with prostitutes can attend a John school where completing the courses would mean no jail time. And one man has already graduated, Magna Come Loud. Two jokes in one. We'll be back with more Gutfeld. This is Ainsley Earhart. Thank you for joining me for the 52 episode podcast series, The Life of Jesus.

A listening experience that will provide hope, comfort, and understanding of the greatest story ever told. Listen and follow now at foxnewspodcasts.com or wherever you listen to podcasts. All right, stop everything, America. Actor Ed Norton is demanding a national economic strike to get ice out of Minnesota. Because are these not normal times? These are not normal times. And it's, like, we have, you know, extrajudicial. like assaults on Americans and humans going on a daily basis now.

I think we should be talking about a national general economic strike until this is over and stopped. Wow, look at that couch. Pretty brave, Ed, this coming from the guy whose biggest sacrifice this year was switching to diet caviar when feeding his puma. Then there's NYU professor Scott Galloway, who also doesn't mind if you feel the pain. I'm talking about something quieter, far more unsettling to the system, and that is an economic strike. A short-term coordinated withdrawal from spending and maybe work. Wealthy households took their spending down 10 percent, and middle-class and lower-income households, which have a difficult time reducing their spend, took it down 5 percent. You would take GDP negative almost overnight.

Overnight. Not true. But who is he talking to? Certainly not the penniless orphans in my wallet factory. And not most Americans either. Sorry, Scott, most people aren't going to stop buying food for their kids because you said so. So you got an actor and an academic two jerks insulated from the consequences of their own commands. Both are worth millions and can afford a few days without a $20 smoothie from a cafe that's so hip.

The female barista has a penis. And their jobs aren't exactly necessary for society. function. You think America is going to miss another Ed Norton movie or a podcast from Galloway? That's like choosing between gonorrhea and syphilis. But with a national strike, everyone with real jobs and actual families suffer. But that's just a pesky detail for the happily insulated virtue signaller. They either don't see that their luxury ideas have grave consequences or they don't care. Galloway lives in London. Easy for him to skip a meal there. The food sucks. But the big joke here is that they think they'll be taken seriously. That's the only good thing about their advice. No one takes it. Climate change, crime, trans, you listen to them, it's all the same.

The issue is irrelevant because it's really about their egos. Whether it's open borders or ending bail, Dems don't see beyond the instant gratifying attention. Then they lose interest once the grim fallout follows. Because by the time the damage became evident, they've already moved on. You know, it reminds me of the free Brittany movement, which was all the rage among those who flit from one cause to the next.

Oh, they got their wish. Brittany was legally emancipated, but she was still mentally ill. And as her so-called champions moved on, she remained on Instagram, nearly naked, dancing with knives, or what Bill Clinton called a challenge. Her saviors were not saviors at all, just self-involved douche-beyshe. who enabled this self-destruction to then be handled by the family members that they had demonized.

Sound familiar? Well, look at ICE, who's only in Minneapolis to clean up the mess that opened borders caused. And now those who caused this label those guys the Nazis. And then they lie and say, nobody asked for this. Nobody asked for this. Nobody put them up to it. They decided to launch this in order to show off what they could do. what they could do. And now they are in full retreat. If you were one of millions of Americans

who protested ICE out of Minneapolis, you should know. Tonight, you are winning this thing. You are winning. Winning what exactly? Who are you rooting for? More dead people from her comfortably warm and secure studio. She applauds the chaos that caused two deaths.

Which was the point all along. Create chaos leading to tragedy, which causes more chaos. more chaos and Rachel's numbers will go up. But why doesn't she out there leading the charge instead of home ripping phone books in half to maintain forearm strength? I guess it's just better for others to risk their lives doing stupid that drives her ratings up. She's a modern-day Eddie Haskell, egging her friend to eat the tide pods while she films it for her show. That's been her M.O. for years, as well as maintaining her eerie resemblance to Manix. But we are different people now. We've seen this before. They take a short-term position

that guarantees long-term harm, then they blame us when it goes bad. But we're done. They follow the same pathetic playbook so many times. Cleaning up their messes is now what we do best. So they can either grab a mob, a mop, and help, or they can f*** off. Let's welcome it. Listen ad-free with a Fox News podcast plus subscription on Apple Podcasts. And Amazon Prime members can listen to this show, ad-free on the Amazon Music app.