Gutfeld! Monologues - Candles And Cake For The Prez Who's Barely Awake

Episode Date: November 25, 2023

As seen on Gutfeld!, FOX News Contributor Charlie Hurt, Host of the Hoop Chat Emily Austin, Comedian Jim Florentine, and Host of the Kennedy Saves The World podcast, Kennedy discusses the latest videos released from the January 6th riot at the Capitol.   Later, the panel discusses the future of the country as President Joe Biden turned 81 this week. Follow Greg on Twitter: @GregGutfeld   Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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or read a five-minute summary of the book at economic principles.org. Let's welcome tonight's guest. Ironically, he moved from D.C. to a farm to deal with less crap. Fox News contributor Charlie Hurts. Looks, charm, intelligence, all things she's complimented me for having. Host of the hoop chat, Emily Austin. He's got the voice of an angel if that angel smoked marble reds for 30 30 years, comedian Jim Florentine.

And finally, she has a full-time intern just to clean her glasses. Host of Kennedy Saves the World Podcast, Kennedy. All right, Charlie. It's not just a farm, by the way. I'm literally right across the street from a dairy. And do you know how much cow crap gets created by a dairy? No, how much? It's a lot.

But I still roll the window down when I get close because it smells so much better than D.C. No, that just says, I was going to say that just means that the inside of your car smells really bad. And it's also less than you get on the street walking around New York. That is true. And there's no cattle here. Not San Francisco, though. Yeah, no, very bad. What do you make of this latest release videos?

Are you surprised? Did you learn anything? Well, yeah. I mean, at first I thought that the reason Democrats were so upset about the video being released is I thought they were just trying to, like trying to, you know, because nobody cares about this. This is not a political issue that's going to work in an election. And so I thought maybe they were trying to like trying to pretend like there was something secret about all this stuff. But now I think when you look at the video, miles and miles of video where people are not doing anything.

And the biggest lie is what you pointed out. Nobody supported this. There's not a single person at Fox or in any sort of, and I hang out with some real right wingers. I'm a real, like, even my dad, you don't get more right-wing than my dad. My dad's like, this is disgusting. This is terrible. We should be, nobody did. Is he still hiding in Argentina? So they have to build this lie that there are all these people who are like supporting this stuff.

And then, but it turns out that actually what it is, it's a bunch of old grandmas and, you know, people that were, are upset about their country and upset about their government and think that the election was stolen. Yeah, I mean, Emily, if that was an attempted coup, that's like the most polite attempted coup I've ever seen. Imagine, though, like, if four, I think there were four people from January among the protesters that committed suicide. If that were the BLM protest or even these pro-Palestinian Hamas people that had committed suicide, there would be monuments everywhere. Instead, we don't even know their names. No, they're freedom fighters, Greg. And that's the problem. America is preaching, we are serving justice by Trump. trying these people who apparently were very peaceful,

but they strategically did not show us that part of the media. And instead, right now, you mentioned BLM, they burnt down businesses to the ground. They robbed Chanel and Gucci in the name of Black Lives. We have pro-Kamas groups that are barricading the borders of the White House, that are throwing blood there, putting free Gaza on police cars, shadowing windows, and vandalizing and killing people in L.A. And I haven't heard the outrage.

They put a kaffi on Benjamin Franklin's head. They ripped down statues. And it's true, though. They've ripped down American flags all over Manhattan. Where's the outrage? Where is the justice now, America? How come we are very selective on something that happened three years ago? When right now, they're destroying our own country as we speak.

No outrage there. Yeah. When I saw Ben Franklin with a kaffa on, he looked a lot like, Fidel Castro. Fidel Castro? You know, Jim, I'm going to read you a question that was written by one of my writers. Okay. Jim, what do you think is a worse event, January 6th, or one of your stand-up shows?

You sure that wasn't my agent that wrote that? Is this just another cover-up? It is, and it's also, that's a lot of footage to be putting out there 40,000 hours. Yeah. You know, at least can you break it up in like a 10-part Netflix series? It's like to watch it slowly, you know what I mean? That's going to be a lot of boring stuff, the 40,000 hours. That is a, but you point out, though, kind of an interesting difference that the Democrats know how to put on a show.

They, like, they curated it, put it together, and knew everybody was going to watch it, and all the networks were going to take it. And then what we do is we just release all of it and it just like kind of like dilutes. Yeah, that's a like, Tarantino's our director. You let it go 40,000 hours. Like his movies, you know, they should at least put like a bloopers reel out. Like someone that made a mistake and went to the Lincoln Memorial instead. You know, someone, maybe they maced themselves.

I'd like to see stuff like that. Or maybe put like a cool soundtrack behind the 40,000 hours, like some cool music. Yeah. Have like, I don't know, you know, somebody narrated. That'd be cool. Yeah, like who? It should be you, actually, with your voice. I would do that.

Yeah. Or Morgan Freeman. Yes. People always say that about my voice. If he's doing voiceovers or Hollywood, I go, until Morgan Freeman dies, I got no shot. Yeah, that's everything. So I'm just waiting.

You're just waiting slowly. Kennedy, how are you? Hi. Yeah. Does this infuriate you? It kind of bugs me because I know that there's nothing that can be done. And there are people, we actually have political prisoners in America right now, and we go on with our lives.

Yeah, we have political prisoners in Russia and people go on with their lives. Journalists, and no one seems to care. But yeah, to Emily's point, like all this stuff is happening here, yet we reserve words like insurrection for a group of people that we're politically opposed to. And that's how, you know, a hyper politicized process is actually dangerous for everybody because you were creating a climate where you could be imprisoned essentially without due process because someone doesn't like your ideas. But what they never consider is, well, what happens if the pendulum swings and the people I hate are in charge? And now they don't like my ideas. Well, guess what? They can throw you in prison just as easily, and it will happen in this country because our

sense of justice is so skewed, and it is so incredibly out of control and imbalanced. And, you know, it's like I watch those protesters walk up to the White House and put their little bloody palm prints on everything. And I was like, insurrection. Yeah. Ooh. It's Adam Kinsinger and it's tears now. Yeah. All right.

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Thank you. I deserve it. Another year around the sun as creepy Joe turns 81. President Biden turned 81 years old and he celebrated with a fresh bottle of embalmed. fluid. I'm kidding. They actually sang happy birthday to him. And by the way, it's my birthday today and they can actually sang birthday to me. I just want you know it's difficult turning 60. Diffical. Diffical. I think Joe knows all about turning 60. He's done it three times. But after that song, Joe stripped down and had the press play, connect the liver

spots with their sharpies. But Bloomberg News calls his age his biggest liability for 2024. You know, if you don't count Hunter, the open border, the bad economy, the war in Ukraine, the war in Israel, the botched Afghanistan withdrawal, the rising crime rate, payoffs from China and, of course, the price of gas and eggs. Meanwhile, Politico reports, quote, even those in Biden's inner circle, including family members, worry about the optics of age. Some acknowledge that the president can at times appear frail? Can at times appear frail? That's an understatement. He's so frail. Dust comes out when he pees. He's so frail, he broke his hip reading. The Wall Street Journal called his running for re-election an act of profound selfishness.

Quote, aging people, even if they're not surrounded by yes men, can be the last to notice times tall. Yeah, especially when these yes men say yes to everything Joe says, except did I s*** myself? And in Biden's case, his aging brain can't tell the difference between a six-year-old girl and a teenager. Behold. I love your ears.

I love them. They're really cool. What's your name? Catherine? Catherine? What a beautiful name. That's my mommy's name. Well, nice to see. How old are you?

17? Six. Six. Hmm. You know, that's the kind of mistake that gets most men 15 to 20. Or a seat on Jeffrey Epstein's private jet. So what do you get the man who has it all yet remembers nothing? Well, let's see what his pals got.

see what his pals got him. You'll never guess what Kamala got Joe for his birthday. Check it out, huh? Oh, my God. And for the eighth year in a row, here's what Hunter got him. His brother got him the usual money. The girls in the secretarial pool got him some new sniffing material. Mr. Jill got him a special card he's supposed to keep in his wallet. The crew of Air Force One got him this for the next time he tries to board. And finally, those cheap skate Taliban, all they got him was this card.

You know, Emily, I think it's a bad thing for Republicans to focus on age, because that gives him a free pass on everything else. everything else. I'm literally crying from his birthday presence right now. Okay, I don't ever want to bash anyone's age because may you live until 120. God bless you, Amy. I agree. It's our audience. You don't have to run for president, but

you know what? It is his birthday. So I actually wrote a little letter for Biden that I'd like to share. Happy birthday president. May you live until 120. May you have another year of single-handedly ruining the economy. creating a new term called Biden inflation, which I use every single day now, opening our borders, welcoming so many new friends and Hamas terrorists. And last but not least, for single-handedly

sending billions to Iran to keep up the terror. Thank you so much, Mr. President. Happy birthday. You know, Jim, I made this point on the five, and nobody laughed. So I'm going to say it to you, it's funny when you see, because Trump is not much younger than Joe, but meanwhile, Trump is doing stand up while Joe can barely stand up. Thank you. Got to laugh here. I said that to what's that guy who sits in a Jesse and he's just nodded. He wasn't even listening. Anyway. Was there a mirror nearby? Yes, it was a mirror. What do you think about his birthday? You know, he's old. I mean, they're saying like a lot of people, have worried, like what if there's a national security threat in the middle of the night,

how he'll be able to handle it? He's 81. He's getting up 10 times a night going to the bathroom. He's going to be fine. If anyone's going to be awake, it's going to be him. That's true. That's true. Well, I mean, I got an idea like, you know, John F. Kennedy was 43 when he was sworn in, right? So Joe Biden, if he gets the second nomination, he'll be 86 when he's out of office. So the Biden teams are just going to say, hey, listen, you're not going to vote in one old man. You're going to vote in two, JFK. That might work. That might work. That might work. I don't know if it will, Kennedy. What do you think of this, like, the age thing? Is the age the worst thing about Joe? No. There are people turning 100 left and right. I mean, there are people who are in their 90s and close to 100 who are running circles around him. Yeah, look at Deucey.

Yeah. Steve Deucey is 117 years old. It is incredible. The man is up at two in the morning, single-handedly running this network. Yes, he's so spry. He's too important here. We can't let him go run the country. But yeah, Joe Biden, it's the fact that he's in mental decline that is never going to reverse itself. Like he's never going to be spry. He's never going to remember things.

He's never going to have his former strength. So the Wall Street Journal is right. It is an act of selfishness. It's also an act of cruelty. You know, the yes men and women that you talk about, they're the ones who are propping him up. He's incredibly stubborn. He's been to the summit. Anyone who has been president never wants to give away that power.

And they're letting him. And shame on them. He should have the wisdom to step aside, but he can't because Kamala's horrible. Yeah, that's exactly right. And less popular than he is. Kamala is his insurance plan, right? You know, I heard that like Joe actually applied for a balance of nature commercial, and they said no. Relaxium, though.

Relaxium. Sleepy Joe can sell one or two bottles of notes. Charlie, they keep talking about this bubble wrap strategy, like the analogy of just wrapping him in bubble wrap. What could that mean? Well, I mean, I think it's an admission that it's not going to get better from here. Yeah. And I agree with you.

You know, his age is probably his least terrible liability. but it is a problem and it's it's you know is he going to fall less yeah as as time goes on it's only going to get worse and I don't think that Donald Trump is going if Trump winds up being the nominee I don't think that he's going to let him get away with doing trying the whole the basement strategy but you know carrying on with what Kennedy said you know it is it is absolutely selfish but it's also two levels of selfishness it's not just his own selfishness and his own self-regard But it's also, he's, like, surrounded by family who are, like, still making money off of him. That's true.

And they have to prop him up. And they, and it's the most, it's the cruelest thing I feel like we've ever seen in recent politics. Yeah, I'm trying, it's like having, like, an entertainer in your family who's really old. And so you just wheel him out and try, for the fans. And then you just take the money, you take the money. Like Liza Minnelli, remember that on the, is that that the Oscars when Lady Gaga wheeled her out? And it was really sad. Am I doing a show right now?

It's like he's their ATM machine. Yeah, he's her ATM machine. Yeah, except things come out of him. But, Greg, I didn't know, I didn't know when you meant bubble wrap analogy. I thought you literally meant physically wrapping it on him because he falls so much. And then I was like, oh, that actually wouldn't make me. That's only when they move him. All right.

We are out of time. Thanks to Charlie Heard, Emily Austin, Jim Florenton, Kennedy, our studio at it. It's time, Greg Gutfeld. I love you, America. From the Fox News Podcasts Network. Hey there, it's me. Kennedy, make sure to check out my podcast. Kennedy saves the world. It is five days a week, every week.

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