Gutfeld! Monologues - Dumber Than A Box Of Rocks!

Episode Date: February 1, 2025

As seen on Gutfeld!, Greg comments on a hilarious line Trump Border Czar Tom Homan used to comment on the intelligence of left-wing reporters. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Tucker Carlson said Ray Dalio is one of the world's smartest investors, but more important, he's likely the wisest. Make yourself read this book. That book is how countries go broke, the big cycle. In it, Dalio explains the mechanics behind big debt cycles, and what they mean for countries with big and increasing debts like the U.S. and what you should do to protect yourself. You can find it wherever books are sold,

or read a five-minute summary of the book at economic principles.org. Yes. All right, all right, all right, all right, I'm right, I right, I'm right. Stop! You're so needy. Good evening, everyone. So Vogue magazine criticized Melania Trump's 2025 White House portrait, comparing her to a freelance magician. Well, it is true.

She sure made Jill disappear. President Trump said he will send 30,000 illegals to Guantanamo Bay. They'll be coming from Philly, New York, and San Fran. So consider it an upgrade. Meanwhile, in an interview, Borders Tsar Tom Homan called Joy Reid Dumber than a boxer rocks. The American Geological Society

has demanded an apology. Speaking of rock, scientists have discovered an asteroid that has a 1% chance of hitting Earth. But it has a 99% chance of hitting J.B. Pritzker. Because he's really fat. I mean, seriously, look it up. Kamala Harris remains the frontrunner for the 2028 nomination.

I know, that's some accolade. That's like being first in line at a James Carville kissing booth. I'd rather be first than laugh. That is disgusting. It's disgusting. Disgraced ex-New Jersey Senator Baum Menendez was sentenced to 11 years in prison for accepting bribes. He appeared to be really excited about the sentence, but it was just a gold bar in his pants. Since the pandemic, American students have fallen further behind in reading skills.

On the bright side, though, being illiterate is not an obstacle to success. But also, only one-third of New York City fourth graders were deemed proficient in math. Which is great for me. I can now charge twice as much when I buy them beer. Fifteen percent of women in federal prison are actually men claiming to be transgender. That's according to the New York Times. And that weekend I spent at San Quentin. Scientists are using genetic engineering to create mice with two male parents. It's all part of a bigger plan to create mice who love musicals.

And on the view, Joy Behar claims the new White House press secretary got her job because she's a 10. Meanwhile, Joy is on the view because she's a ton. We'll be back with more Gutfeld. This episode is brought to you by Amazon Prime. From streaming to shopping, Prime helps you get more out of your passions. So whether you're a fan of true crime or prefer a nail-biting novel from time to time, with services like Prime Video, Amazon Music, and fast-free delivery, Prime makes it easy to get more out of whatever you're into or getting into.

Visit amazon.com slash prime to learn more The conjuring last rites On September 5th I come down here when you did your help Array! Array! Array! Array!

Array! The Conjuring Last Rites, only in theater, September 5th, where it are. But Joy's right, Caroline Leavitt is a 10. But also 10? The amount of beers it takes for a homeless guy to have sex with Joy Behar. Not homeless, it takes 100. Right. So right now, the Democratic Party is finding itself in a very uncomfortable spot.

And no, I don't mean in a men's room stall next to a very lactose intolerant Bernie Sanders. No, the Dems are screwed because the Republicans have pulled the high ground maneuver by becoming the party of common sense. Which means anything that might challenge that has to be the opposite, as in bat shit crazy. because parties are about differentiation and how do you differentiate from sane? See, by staking out the common sense middle, i.e. public safety, an actual border, cutting a bloated federal budget,

the Republicans have put the Dems in the crazy corner. They're stuck. Now at odds with basic truths Americans' desire. It was always the case, but now it's really transparent. And if any Democrat tries to deal the common sense, card himself like, say, Federman? Then you now look a whole lot like a Republican. Although most Republicans, they wear pants. So if you're the Dems, where do you go? The majority of Americans, they're ready to tell them. The latest poll has the Dems at 31% approval. Can you imagine anyone

being that unpopular? I mean, we can do that. too, Joy, right? You know who else wore white? Hitler. But at no time in recent history has the Democratic Party been more reviled. And they once ran this for president. So the Dems are stuck.

With the high ground now so far out of reach, they need to find out what's left for them because their entire worldview has been rejected like me at an ugly person's conference. And that's because the general public gets common sense. In fact, you could hate Republicans. It still say, you know, I like what they're doing with immigration and crime and trance. It's just common sense.

It's why so many new demographics have shifted right. The right gained ground with every voting block because common sense made sense. As a result, the Dems now have no way to dissent without being against common sense. Take the illegal raids. Sure, some lefties scream. racism, but the public hears, wait, they're deporting violent migrant criminals. I'm for that, and I'm Mexican. True.

You know, many people of color actually live in these neighborhoods. I know because I go there to teach at-risk youth CPR. And what about trans? Well, would you want your daughter playing? junior high basketball against a dude who's taller, stronger, and heavier by 30 pounds? Do you think children who can't spell transgender should be having their bodies permanently altered like they're a suit off the rack at men's warehouse? Meanwhile, the odds of genuine gender dysphoria actually happening naturally are about the same as Nancy Pelosi's face. It has to be

created. The common sense answer, supported by most Americans, leaves the left with nowhere to go. On crime, same thing. Whatever your party affiliation, common sense means you want your loved ones coming home at night in the same shape they left in, even if it is the shape of a beanbag chair. Is there anything sadder than watching liberal mayors and governors trying to defend murderers, rapists, and child traffickers?

It's crazy. And what can the left say when only 6% of DC workers actually go to work? Besides, get your lazy ass into the office. Especially when thousands of government buildings sit empty like a meeting of the Jim Acosta fan club. Is there any way to oppose that and not sound like a nut in risk being hired by MSNBC? The truth is, the woke world took over the Democratic Party. and so common sense was there for the taking and Trump took it

and now the Dems are on the outside looking in like Joe Biden at a mausoleum see the Dems can't be the other party of common sense that lane is occupied and it all happened because the Dems were in a competition to outwoke each other allowing Trump to make it safe for common sense

again which means the left is left with defending things that are obviously bad for the country, which now includes the party. Let's welcome here we are tonight. Listen ad-free with a Fox News podcast plus subscription on Apple Podcasts.

And Amazon Prime members can listen to this show ad-free on the Amazon music app. From the Fox News Podcasts Network. Hey there, it's me. Kennedy, make sure to check out my podcast. Kennedy saves the world. It is five days a week, every week. Download and listen at Fox News Podcasts. or wherever you listen to your favorite podcast.