Gutfeld! Monologues - Jim Acosta's Pity Party

Episode Date: July 24, 2026

As seen on Gutfeld! Greg talks about Jim Acosta's claims that he felt unsafe at President Trump's rallies. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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your applause could fill my empty heart. Good evening, everyone. So Kathy Griffin posed for photos on her balcony wearing a string bikini and no makeup. Wow. Surprise onlookers averted their eyes to something less dangerous, like the sun. Former CNN anchor, Brooke Baldwin described her sex life

and claims she's pretty darn good in bed. Brian Stelter also claims he's pretty darn good in bed. But he was referring to his ability to balance a bowl of chili on his belly. The view has been hit with major budget cuts. It's so bad. The ladies have now been reduced to only a dozen bales of hay per day. In particular, the view's wardrobe budget has been slashed to the bone. As a result, Moos R Us has declared bankruptcy. Moos. And because it was so expensive,

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Many leftists are blasting WN. NBA star Sophie Cunningham for saying that men have no place in women's sports. They also say Sophie has no place in women's sports because she's hot. Film star Tom Cruise is returning for days of thunder too. I'm not saying he's getting old, but here's what he's racing in the movie. And finally, in a recent podcast, Hunter Biden told Don Lemon that CNN anchor Jake Tapper is full of crap, which Lemon said is a total deal breaker when it comes to sex. Nobody wants to sleep with a liar.

We'll be back with more Godfeld. Gregus believes in the art of living in choosing the pleasurable over the practical. It's why we craft our premium vodka in France using pure spring water from Jenzac. And why you hear the celebratory pub of our quirk reminding us to make every Martini cocktail count. go on and make every moment count because there's no better time than now. Gregoose. Make time wait. Sip responsibly. At a recent book event in D.C., unemployed gas bag, Jim Acosta was asked some really tough questions.

Like, while covering Trump rallies, did you ever feel unsafe? Did you ever feel unsafe? Did you ever feel like your life was in danger? Yeah, I mean, it was totally crazy. Trump would go into these events and there would be 10,000 people, 20,000 people, and he would whip everybody up into a frenzy, not only against people like Hillary Clinton, but against us. He called us the disgusting news media, the dishonest news media, liars, scum, and it would get so heated that we would have his supporters coming up to us in our press cage, as we lovingly called it, because they put bike racks around us to protect us. They would call us traitor and everything else, and they would be screaming at us as we

were racing off to our cars after the events were over. So, and all of that has stayed kind of baked into our politics ever since that time. And I guess that's the other part of this is how do we drain that poison out of our politics. Wow. He found the heckling terrifying. Come on, somebody throw this big girl a snot-covered hanky so he can dry her tears. People have said worse things to me when I bulldozed that senior center. But as always, Akosta loves to paint himself as a lonely, courageous reporter seeking truth in the face of danger. But actually, he only pretends he was in danger. Jim, let me break it to you.

You were no intrepid journalist. You were CNN. You weren't standing outside the system. You were the system. Now you cry about being harassed by the people you and your network smeared and lied to for years. You helped create and amplify the poison in politics you now whine about.

The fact that he doesn't realize that shows you he's as thick as a shamrock shake. Fact. The right doesn't attack journalists. That's an antiphon. thing. And nothing MAGA ever said resulted in harm done to the media other than to their egos. However, after the media painted big fat targets on people like you and me, many of us got hunted. Besides, Jim, you were just a lousy reporter. Remember this golden oldie about the wall

from 2019? As we're walking along here, we're not seeing any kind of imminent danger. There are no migrants trying to rush toward this fence behind me along this highway. There's a gas station. Burger King, and so on. But no sign of the national emergency that the president has been talking about. As a matter of fact, it's pretty tranquil down here. Well, Jim, that's how Walls work. See, they didn't simply cover the Trump years.

They participated in them. They weren't referees. They were players and dirty ones at that. For years, they told half the country they were racist, fascist, white supremacist, threats to democracy, insurrectionist, deplorables, you know, Nazis. but without that Holocaust stuff. True, even today, we're still being compared to Hitler

by a party that would have elected a guy with a Nazi tattoo. Then they seem genuinely baffled that their targets don't like them. Jim says Trump turned his supporters against the press. No, Trump voiced the frustrations of people you've been painting his villains every single night on CNN.

There's only so many times you can tell a plumber that he's the greatest threat to Western civilization until he decides he's no longer putting up. with your sht. Guys like Acosta talk as if they had no power, but no, the media had enormous power. They decided which stories mattered, which stories mysteriously disappeared into the Bermuda triangle of the nightly news. Hunter Biden's laptop, Russian disinfo. Joe Biden's decline, cheap fakes. Inflation, actually good. The border under control. The summer of love, mostly peaceful. The COVID lab leak, a racist lie. Leah Thomas, a woman. Jim Acosta.

a man. They got every story wrong, then wondered why trust in them collapsed like a boner at a Madonna concert. I know. I know. And that's not because Trump hypnotized America. It's because he exposed the sham. Now, Costa still talks like he's one of the biggest names in journalism, but really, he's the biggest ass seated at the kids' table.

And it's quite a table. O'Berman, Chris Cuomo, John Harwood, Don Lemon, Geraldo, Katie Couric, Brian Stelter, Chris Wallace, Medi Hassan, Joy Reid. It's a who's who of Who Cares. Although Stelter has returned as a media analyst, but that's only because he's blackmailing CNN with naked pictures of himself.

Currick still lurks around, but colonoscopy already told us she's full of shit. But these hacks still pop up at small events, probably because they're stops on. their paper route. Hell, if you needed help stealing your driveway, Don Lemon's available for 50 bucks and a tuna sandwich. You need a lift to the airport. Keith Olberman will drive you in his car if he isn't sleeping in it. So when Jim asks, how do we drain the poison out of our politics? I don't know. Maybe watching you and all these assholes getting tossed from your jobs is a good start.

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