Gutfeld! Monologues - Making Academia Great Again

Episode Date: October 4, 2025

As seen on Guteld!, Greg praises Trump for getting Harvard to spend $500 million on trade schools, making a Harvard degree more useful in the real world. Greg says this move exposes the left because it makes it harder to push class warfare. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Britt Hume's khakis are already in the lobby. Let's welcome tonight's guests. He loves to taunt Governor Hokel by moving his face. EPA administrator Lee Zeldin. The only thing bigger than her in the 90s was Carney Wilson. Host of Kennedy saves the world podcast, Kennedy. He thinks the pottery barn catalog shows too much skin. Fox News contributor, Tom Shaloo.

And you can't keep her down unless she's trapped under a feather. New York Times bestselling author of Fox News Contributor, Cat Tiff. All right. Before we get to some news stories, let's do this. Greg's leftovers. It's leftovers. Where I read the jokes we didn't use this week, and as always, it's my first time reading them. So if they suck, we'll send Joe Mackey to a Manhattan mosque with 300 pulled pork sandwiches. Investigators say they're closer than ever to solving the mystery of Amelia Earhart's plane crash. turns out it was piloted by a woman.

According to a new study, roughly two-thirds of Americans have planned their funerals, and some have even planned others' funerals. The Democrats were mocked after their government shut down live stream only attracted 400 viewers. Or as CNN calls it, ratings gold. Kamala Harris said she asked Bill and Hillary Clinton for running mate advice before choosing Tim Walts. They reminded her wisely that the best safeguard against assassination is a VP who's an idiot.

It's true. Bill also told her to pick someone who, quote, might have to swallow a lot of crap. Well, that's the first time I've heard it called that. An Alabama man set a world record for having a beard that's three and a half feet long. Your move, Rashida. A massive blast at a Chevron refinery in California produced enormous flames visible for miles. Usually to produce a blast of that magnitude, you'd have to pull this man's finger. On October 5th, 1,200 people will run the international,

Taco Bell Ultramarathon, where a competitor stop and eat at nine Taco Bells. Nice. Or you could just stay home and shit in your pants on a treadmill. According to a new study, one in five pet owners carry at least two grand in debt from taking care of their beloved animals. And that number triples when you include doctors' bills from retrieving them out of your ass. I don't get it. Sunny Hausson said it's odd that Pete Heggseth wants tougher physical standards in the military. Yeah, easy for her to say.

She's the only one on the view who can still see her feet. Maxwell House Coffee has a new brand called Maxwell Apartment to better reflect where most drinkers live. They also plan to put out a blend for San Francisco named Maxwell Underpass and Tarp. That's a nice ring to it. Major comedians are being slammed for taking money from Saudi Arabia to perform at the Riyadh Comedy Festival. The royals over there love it, even though every show has a four-wife minimum. Kelly Rippa had to reach down into a cleavage after a microphone fell down there on air.

A similar incident happened to Anna Navarro, but while retrieving it, they discovered three illegals. An American flight turned into a nightmare after a passenger in the middle seat changed a diaper. Hey, when you got to go, you got to go, said the stinky culprit. Researchers say waiting in line is actually good for your brain. No wonder people at Kilmead's book signing are so dumb. That's funny. According to the New York Post, President Trump's

son Barron shut down a whole floor of Trump Tower for a date. It's quite a change from the Bidens. After Hunter had a date, has Matt shut down the whole floor. Finally, a pond in Queens has lost 94% of its depth over the past few years, making it the second most shallow thing in New York. We'll be back with more Gutfeld. This week on the Fox True Crime podcast, I'm joined by retired FBI Special Agent Stacey Perkins

as she discusses the Bureau's Innocent Images Initiative and the many child predators she has helped to bring down. Listen and follow now at Foxtruecrime.com. So Harvard just hired a drag performance. as a visiting professor who goes by the name Lahore Vagestan which coincidentally

is Larry Kudlow's real name before he came to America now Lahore will teach a course or two but one wonders what the final exam will be maybe instead of open book it'll be open pants so why even bring it up well it's part of the reason Trump is changing things Harvard among others gets huge endowments

of government money and what do they do with it They indoctrinate and discriminate. This crap doesn't belong in a taxpayer-supported institution. It belongs in brunch. So it was awesome news this week when Trump got Harvard to spend $500 million to launch and operate trade schools after he had temporarily frozen $2.4 billion in federal grants. So now when you graduate from Harvard, you can get a real job. And even better, Harvard's football team may finally beat those brutes in Pop Warner.

So, Mr. P, is it something you're close to finalizing? This is something that we're close to finalizing. We haven't done it yet. But they put up $500 million interest and everything else would go to that account, meaning go to the trade school. And, you know, it's a big investment in trade school done by very smart people. And then their sins are forgiven. They're going to be teaching people how to do AI and lots of other things.

Lots of things. You know, we need people in Tracek's engines. Think of the implications. Where the real status symbol isn't a Ph.D. in grievance studies, it's a diesel mechanic certificate. You will actually learn to build, not tear down. And it comes with something those other degrees don't and honest days work. So Trump is making academia great again.

The solution was simple, cut off the federal money until academia delivers the goods. We could be entering a new. gilded age, except instead of robber barons, we'll have rebar barons. Thank you. Instead of giant debt, no skills will have jobs that could pay the bills. And he's exposing leftists at the same time. Remember how much they love class warfare inflaming the difference between one economic group with another? So you think Harvard creating trade schools would be embraced by the media for white and blue collar finally joined together. But nope. And why? Because even though class warfare easy propaganda from a tenured perch.

A plumber or an electrician isn't going to buy that. It's funny, while we focused on Trump building a border wall, he's tearing down others. And this trade school move ridicules Harvard snobbery, mocking the elitist currency that a diploma became. It's really nothing more than the chance to rub elbows with other rich brats. But it gets even better. For decades, the left did what they did to any institution. They replaced principal with politics.

Instead of learning, you had obeying. Instead of merit, you got discrimination. Instead of developing nuclear fusion, they gave us diversity, equity, and inclusion. That's changing, too. The White House just told several colleges, if they want federal money, they better agree to certain things, like banning the use of race or sex in admissions. They left out my clause, which would deny admission to co-eds who are a seven or lower. But I'll take what I can get. So where does this all lead? Well, the new Ivy League power couple won't be hedge funders. It'll be a dude who can wire your house and a chick who can build one.

And soon parents will be saying proudly, my son went to Harvard. And when someone asks law or business, they'll reply, hell no, he's got a real job. He's a welder. Here we end. Listen ad free with a Fox News podcast plus subscription on Apple Podcasts. and Amazon Prime members can listen to this show ad-free on the Amazon music app. It's Will Tane Country. Watch it live at noon Eastern Monday through Thursday at Fox News.com

or on the Fox News YouTube channel. And don't miss the show. Listen and follow the podcast five days a week at Fox News Podcasts.com or wherever you download your favorite podcasts.