Gutfeld! Monologues - President Biden's Second Act?

Episode Date: March 25, 2025

As seen on Gutfeld!, Greg comments on former President Biden's big weekend in New York City at the opening night of Othello on Broadway. Plus, Greg mocks Senator Bernie Sanders (I-VT) for storming out of an interview after being asked a very simple question.  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Tucker Carlson said Ray Dalio is one of the world's smartest investors, but more important, he's likely the wisest. Make yourself read this book. That book is how countries go broke, the big cycle. In it, Dalio explains the mechanics behind big debt cycles, and what they mean for countries with big and increasing debts like the U.S. and what you should do to protect yourself. You can find it wherever books are sold,

or read a five-minute summary of the book at economic principles.org. Yes, I know. All right, all right, all right. That'll do, that'll do for now. It's Friday. So you know what that means. Let's welcome tonight's guest. He never has Riders Block or apparently any sunblock.

Novelist and literary critic Walter Kerr. She's a smart Southern Bell who gives liberals hell. Fox Business Acre taken McDowah. This former cheerleader gives us an H for headaches. Co-hosts of Outnumbered Emily Campano. And old ladies fall hard. for this former bodyguard. New York Times, best selling author,

comedian and former NWAW.A. World Champion, Taurus. Yes. Okay, before we get to some news stories, let's do this. Greg's Leftovers. It's Leftovers, where I read the jokes we didn't use this week,

and as always, it's my first time reading them. So if they suck, we'll make Joe Mackey run a 10K without his sports bra. When asked how he's doing the job differently than Kamala Harris, J.D. Vance joked that he doesn't have four shots of vodka before every meeting. And outraged Harris replied, that's a lie. It's gin. A Florida man's been arrested after sending Trump disturbing messages, calling him the antichrist, with one saying, fight me naked until the death.

Well, it sounds like somebody's taking Trump's presidency really hard. Rosie O'Donnells officially confirmed her move to Ireland. She had considered moving to Scotland, but was told they already had the Loch Ness Monster. By the way, Rosie turned 63 today. Yeah, to celebrate her friends wanted a woman to jump out of a cake, but Rosie already ate the cake. According to a new study, two-thirds of Americans experience math anxiety.

The other third are Asian. Oh, racist would say. That's for NPR. Joe Scarborough slammed his fist on a a table to demonstrate his frustration with Elon Musk. Mika seemed shocked since she hasn't seen Joe pound anything in years. Proud of that one. Proud of that one. Tush. Yes, that was vicious. Yes. An Arizona man was executed, but not before eating a last meal of onion rings, French fries,

two sandwiches, baklava, and a double Western cheeseburger. After hearing the news, Jay Pritzker said, I should murder someone. Donald Trump revoked Secret Service protection for Joe Biden's adult children, Hunter, and Ashley. Ashley is quite terrified as she used the protection from her father. Dwarf actors planned to protest Snow White

for not hiring dwarfs to play dwarfs. Many fans agree wishing they'd cast Peter Dinklage such as Doc or Warwick Davis as sleepy. And this lady has tipsy. It's true. The WNBA is getting its own comedy show. It's called the WNBA. A Kennedy Center employee was fired

after he delivered a naked monologue bashing Donald Trump. Here he is. Now everyone knows he's unemployed. and has a small penis. Caitlin Jenner wrote on X that she's more masculine than Tim Walts. True, Caitlin definitely has no need for tampons.

Thank you. Hi, Caitlin. Thanks for watching. Yes, Caitlin loves us. Yes. Used to. Because of Trump's return to office, singer Courtney Love is applying for British citizens.

The upside, thanks to the country's strict gun laws, she's less likely to drive a husband to blow his brains out. Thank you. A transgender runner destroyed the competition at the Oregon High School girls' track meet. He might have had an advantage, though, given he brought his own track meat. We'll be back. with more Gutfeld. Mint is still $15 a month for premium wireless. And if you haven't made the switch yet,

here are 15 reasons why you should. One, it's $15 a month. Two, seriously, it's $15 a month. Three, no big contracts. Four, I use it. Five, my mom uses it. Are you playing me off? That's what's happening, right?

Okay. Give it a try at mintmobile.com slash switch. Up front payment of $45 for three-month plan. $15 per month equivalent required. New customer offer first three. months only, then full price plan options available. Taxes and fees extra. See mintmobile.com.

This episode is brought to you by Amazon Prime. From streaming to shopping, Prime helps you get more out of your passions. So whether you're a fan of true crime or prefer a nail-biting novel from time to time, with services like Prime Video, Amazon music, and fast-free delivery, Prime makes it easy to get more out of whatever you're into or getting into. Visit Amazon.com slash Prime to learn more. Track meat. Yesterday was free ice cream cone day at Dairy Queen.

In related news, one man broke the record for visiting the most dairy queens in a day. A Florida man reportedly received $160 worth of lap dances and didn't have the money to pay for them. Just put it on my text. said one man. And finally, a doctor revealed silicone injections a man got in Mexico to make his penis larger, turned it into an unusable blob. The man's identity was not revealed, but we have a picture. Thank God we blocked out those eyes, huh?

You'll never know who that is. All right. As Elon Musked SpaceX rescued two stranded astronauts, what were the Dems up to? Trying to destroy his company. Remember build back better? Now it's firebomb a Tesla dealership. Tesla cars are being vandalized all over, including what appear to be a coordinated attack on showrooms and charging stations. I mean, that's an organized event, right?

That's an organized event. You know, take a look at their signs. Take a look. They're all made by the same sign company. A nice, expensive job. And now some dams openly back a day of action against Tesla scheduled for March 29th. Damn, I'm old enough to remember when Democrats' idea of action was nailing a big-boned intern. Of course.

Of course, the Democrat party. party's new face is in the thick of it. I bet she's truly there for selfish reasons. I am truly here for very selfish reasons. Starting with on March 29th, it's my birthday. And all I want to see happen on my birthday is for Elon to be taken down. Yes.

She says her birthday is March 29th. I guess now I know her email password. So instead of candles on a cake, they're going to light up. some electric cars, but at least Crockett knows nice cars, according to House records reviewed by the Washington Free Beacon. Since taking office two years ago, she's billed taxpayers nearly a thousand bucks a month for her car lease. What kind of car can you lease for that kind of cash? Cadillacs, Range Rovers, Jaguars, Lexus, BMWs. Those are luxury rides on your dime,

when she really should be rolling in this. Well, whatever she's driving, I hope she opted for tinted windows, so we don't have to see her. But these are the people who want to take down Musk. It's people who don't get their hands dirty. Hosts of talk shows, Democrat leaders, keyboard warriors, all who can play it safe from home, like this douchebag. Elon Musk is incompetent in his position. And how do we know? Because they fired tens of thousands of people, who's challenged in court.

The court said the people have to go back, and now the people are coming back. He's incompetent. He's a thief. He's a Nazi. And people don't trust him. He's a Nazi. Great job, CNN. You let that go through without any pushback. No wonder everyone watched the space rescue on Fox and only go to you for train wrecks. So these ghouls recklessly egg it on, but they're not throwing the homemade bombs themselves. Sound familiar? Yeah, that last big Democrat protests, the summer of love. This week's burning cars bring you right back to that visually. Let's compare and contrast.

Why is it whenever Dems get excited? They egg on destruction. And what burns is the very thing they claimed a champion. Post-George Floyd, it was minority businesses, a billion dollars worth. And here it's electric cars, the Holy Grail, and their divine crusade to save the planet. And by torching Tesla, they also torch the one remaining issue they had. Climate change. For they revealed no surprise.

their concern was all in act, just a phony cause to build taxpayers out of billions. And now they abandoned the cause because the guy who makes electric cars is helping Trump cut government waste. So how can the Dems talk about climate now? How can they talk about anything? All they do is incite chaos and destruction and they call us the monsters. Well, at least Trump, who unlike the previous guy, won't take this shit lying down, literally. From what they tell me, they can get 20 years in jail, and they'll get it. I'll tell you, there's going to be no leniency, and there'll be no pardons. So, thank you.

I appreciate it. So will all this mayhem hurt Musk? A little bit, maybe. But you know who it'll really hurt? The people who build and sell those cars. It also hurts anybody with a pension fund that includes Tesla's stock. You know, voters. But it also hurts the Democratic.

party. After fanning the flames of hate, how can they disown the fires that actually result? They can't. Turns out it's not Tesla that's being burned to the ground. It's their own stupid, fucked up party. Listen

ad free with a Fox News podcast plus subscription on Apple Podcasts. And Amazon Prime members can listen to this show ad free on the Amazon music app. This is Jason Chaffetz from the Jason in the House podcast. Join me every Monday to dive deeper into the latest political headlines and chat with remarkable guests.

Listen and follow now at Fox Newspodcast.com. Or wherever you download podcasts.