Gutfeld! Monologues - The Elderly Keep Clinging On

Episode Date: December 17, 2024

As seen on Gutfeld!, Host of the Tyrus & The Wise Men podcast, Tyrus pokes fun at the refusal of Octogenarians to leave positions of power, from Senator Mitch McConnell (R-KY) to former House Speaker Nancy Pelosi (D-CA) to, of course, President Biden. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Tucker Carlson said Ray Dalio is one of the world's smartest investors, but more important, he's likely the wisest. Make yourself read this book. That book is how countries go broke, the big cycle. In it, Dalio explains the mechanics behind big debt cycles, and what they mean for countries with big and increasing debts like the U.S. and what you should do to protect yourself. You can find it wherever books are sold,

or read a five-minute summary of the book at economic principles.org. What it is. As you well know, I am Tyrus. I'm in for what, Greg, on the special edition of Gutfeld. Let's have some humor. Reports claim Kamala Harris is weighing, running for the governorship of California. She won't go quietly into the night, just like most other loud drunks. We're coming out guns blazing tonight. All right. The U.S. Embassy in Syria is urging all Americans to leave the country due to an ongoing,

volatile and unpredictable security situation. And for the same reason, they're also urging all Americans to leave San Francisco. Oh, boy. Nancy Pelosi had her hip replaced after an injury. The same week, Mitch McConnell

had to get wheeled out of the Capitol building, which means only one thing. Those two are banging. There's an image for you. He went out in a wheelchair. Actor Brian Cox said Kevin Spacey's been punished enough and should be forgiven by the industry. Spacey replying, what's this about Cox?

COX. And finally, a Washington, D.C. Restaurant Server was fired after making comments about refusing to serve Trump officials. I think we have a picture of the restaurant server here. All right, let's hit the monologue. So do you remember last year around the holidays, everyone was arguing about genders and toxic this and toxic that and what was on the shelf at Target?

And if women's swimsuits left room for a stocking stuffer? And Joe Biden, he didn't even know it was Christmas at all. He thought Santa was one of his advisors. Hell, we still didn't even. know what a woman was. But this year, we found out because now, so many of them are pregnant or ready to pop. Cats got one on the way. Hell, even Father Time is having a baby. Oh, it will never end. We're multiplying faster than the Chinese math student. So many women are looking to get pregnant that poor Joe Mackey had to go into hiding.

And you guys know with my track record, some of you will get knocked up just from watching me on this show right now. My point is this. Masculine men are back. Baby making, beer drinking, UFC watching, fall asleep on the couch watching football, only to wake up to say, hey, I'm watching that. We'll be back with more Gutfeld. Flying first class with Alaska Airlines isn't just about getting there. It's about enjoying the journey. Stretch out with industry leading legroom, sink into an adjustable headrest,

and cozy up with a custom filsome blanket on long flights. Savor hot, fresh meals, never frozen, and sip on our kids. Custom Stumptown Coffee, brewed to taste great at 30,000 feet. Upgrade your next trip. Book now at alaskaair.com. This episode is brought to you by Dogfish Head Craft Brewery. The Grateful Dead and Dogfish Head have gotten the band back together with the release of Grateful Dead juicy pale ale, a light-bodied with sustainable curns of grains, granola,

and heaps of good karma for a refreshing brew that's music to your taste buds. Available nationwide, visit Dogfish.com to find Grateful Dead. a juicy pale ale in your neck of the woods. Dogfish Headcraft Brewery is located in Milton, Delaware. Please drink responsibly. And in a way, this election was the return to manhood. Look no further than Trump's crew of studs who joined him at the Army-Navy game this weekend. Musk, Vance, Pete Hesiv, there was more testosterone in there than a gay rodeo.

Big gay rodeo person. All right. All right. And how about Daniel Penny getting a hero's welcome as he joined Trump and Vance in their body? Mike Johnson was there too, and everyone was like, how the hell did he get in there? But don't forget about Tulsi Gabbard.

She's no man, but she's the perfect concern. woman, smart, brave, and could roundhouse your ass, and she wouldn't even need to say, hold my beer. I heard during the halftime show, she went in the parking line and won a push-up contest. You know who wasn't there? Joe Biden, which is in all surprising, considering he never showed up during his entire presidency. So what's his excuse this year? It's not like he's busy.

But what this is is what America is really all about now, thanks to Trump. Alpha is ready to get things done. Meanwhile, here's what's going on in Canada. We were supposed to be on a steady, if difficult sometimes, march towards progress. And yet, just a few weeks ago, the United States voted for a second time to not elect its first woman president.

Everywhere, women's rights and women's progress is under attack, overtly and subtly. But I want you to know that I am. and always will be a proud feminist. You know, Justin, with that attitude, you're never going to be governor of the 51st state of Canada. Now, if there was any doubt

how things will be different under this new regime looked no further than this headline. Hamas relented in the ceasefire talks under Trump pressure. Yep, according to a senior Biden official, the pressure from Trump was a factor in Hamas relenting on two key. issues a ceasefire and hostage release talks with Israel. And that's because Trump said there would

be hell to pay if the hostages weren't released before he takes office in January. Funny how when the top men and women come together, we get things done. And it's going to happen across the board. Fixing the border, curbing inflation, getting rid of DEI, making progress in those areas builds work ethic and accountability across the board. Success will spread like butter on Chris Christy's Big Mac. Hey, it's okay. He's a friend. And it's not just me saying all this.

Trump's critics are coming around too. Here's CNN Van Jones admitting reality. Roll it, Hans. Guys, can we cut it out? Donald Trump is not an idiot. Donald Trump, let me just be very clear. Donald Trump is smarter than me, you, and all critics. You know why we know?

Because he has the White House, the Senate, The house. Totally agree. The popular vote. This dude is a phenomenon. He is the most powerful human on earth and in our lifetime. And we're still saying, well, how is this God? We look like idiots to order it.

You're totally right. You're totally right. I'm so bros. Well, to quote the greatest Christmas movie of all time, die hard. Welcome to the parties, pal. Hashtag NUFSA! Listen ad-free with a Fox News podcast plus subscription on Apple Podcasts, and Amazon Prime members can listen to this show,

ad-free on the Amazon Music app. Listen to the all-new Brett Bear podcast, featuring Common Ground, in-depth talks with lawmakers from opposite sides of the aisle, along with all your Brett Bear favorites, like his All-Star panel, and much more. Available now at foxnewspodcasts.com or wherever you get your podcasts.