Guys: With Bryan Quinby - Guys: Episode 154 - DIY Guys with Kevin Banner

Episode Date: January 13, 2026

We had stand up comedian Kevin Banner on the show to talk about DIY Guys! How many books is enough to call a room a library? Should you work for your landlord? What the hell is up with Chip from Fixer Upper? Watch Kevin's special Heavy Favourite  There is more Chris at https://www.patreon.com/notevenashow And for more Guys content, streams and SHOCKTOBER: a deep dive into shock jocks you can click patreon.com/guyspodcast, Join us on the Sunday Night Stream every Sunday night at 8:00 EST at twitch.tv/notevenashowand I am on https://bsky.app/profile/murderxbryan.bsky.social  Guys is on Instagram! https://www.instagram.com/guys.pod Guys has a Post Office Box now! PO Box 10769 Columbus Ohio 43201 Here are the pics from the episode! Library? sex club looking room

welcome to guys, a podcast about guys. Shishu. Shishu. I wanted to do a saw, cutting through wood. Shishu? That's what a saw sounds like. I know you probably don't do a lot of work with tools.

Shishu sounds like a cute, like a character that would be like for the Olympics or something would be the mascot. Shishu, you know? That's what it sounds like to me. This guy's never used a tool in his life. He doesn't know what a saw sounds like.

Yeah, I've never used a tool. I just do a podcast with one. I'm only kidding. I'm a good friend of yours. I play with a. my tool. Penis. Thanks for bailing me out on that.

You're welcome. And this week, our guest, Kevin Banner, hi, Kevin. Hi, Kevin. Hi, boys. I did not realize it was that kind of a filthy podcast, so I'm going to have to step up my game here. Oh, it is. Whoa. That was my, Charlie just was about as loud as has ever been in the other room right

outside the door. So I, I apologize. He's hot under the collar. What are you going to do? Yeah, he just woke up. So, you know what I mean? When you just wake up, it's like, what's going on.

And yeah, just to clarify, Kevin, it is very much that that kind of show, unfortunately, like, in a really disgusting way, yeah. Oh, well. I disagree. See if we can get through this quickly then. I don't know. Hour and a half minimum. That's what we have to do.

Yeah, we have an hour and a half. And it's got to be 90% about come. Okay, Brian, can you, Brian, but let's not, let's not go off the rails before you've even introduced what we're talking about. Can you, that's just, let's, shh, shish. That's the sound of a tool, a tool called a saw cutting through wood. That's what you use it. This is DIY guys, uh, guys that work on their own shit and they're stupid as hell.

And they fuck everything up, but they also are mean to each other, which is good for us. Gotcha. So these are people, your DIY guys like around the house, they're doing all like fixing up. all their own stuff, making like repairs, building things that they need. Just always wanting to do, like, projects, projects. Yeah, what you want to be doing with your life. Yeah, that's, I mean, in a way, I do, I do want to be doing that. I want to get a house and I want to, you know, have different chores and things to do.

I don't know that I'll be a full DIY guy, though, where I'm, you know, looking for projects. I think it's just the stuff like mowing my lawn and doing those basic things that I, that I'm interested in doing. Kevin, do you have any, you have any interest in DIY stuff? Are you at all a DIY guy? I was forced to become one because we bought a house. Well, my wife did, and she's pretty neat, so she lets me live here. But yeah, I do the lawn mowing, which I don't think that counts as DIY.

But if you see like the blue walls behind us, imagine in podcast world, you can see blue wall. I painted that. That's called Salty Dog Blue. Wow. You've picked the color. I picked the color too. Wow. I feel judged.

I feel judged by the way you say that. But yeah, no. No, I've done some DIY stuff around the house. I got some, I made some Christmas decorations for the yard this year. I made some trees with lights on them out front. That's really, now I'm going to ask the questions. It's going to make everyone laugh in the audience. Hey, Brian, are you a DIY guy?

Yeah, I like the music. I'm into Fugazi, you know? No, I'm not. well no when when I mean I was about to say yes and then I was like because I built this room well and what you mean you put the furniture in and put up the the pictures and stuff I didn't put the pictures up oh I don't know how and and but you did have that one project that you're working on for a while where it was a it was a coffee grinder or something that you had taken apart fuck you why are you saying fuck you I threw that in a fucking trash Chris I threw that

$110 coffee grinder to trash and bought another one. Because I was interested in update on that. I'm glad I

got it because you had sent me a number of photographs of your process of taking this thing apart and fixing it and you seem very confident in the messages

you were sending to me that you were just about there. I could have done it. I fully believe that I now understand how a burr coffee grinder works. Hmm. I see.

I could, I fix this one all the time because believe it or not, I keep clogging. it every time I go to, so I always am on a fix with this new one. But I know how it works. You understand. You feel like you're a lethal, you're like lethal shooter for all the basketball heads out though. They'll get that. You understand it now, basically. I just tell everybody, like, listen, I can fix stuff. I think that is apparent. I was a cable guy. I fixed things all the time

when I was doing that. No, I can't believe that's the example you're using. Because you've described your days as a cable guy. I'm not going to bring it up again, but you were obviously all pilled out. You drove on top of someone's Corvette with the truck. You drove into the ditch. You used to use a butter knife instead of a screwdriver. That's DIY. True. It's true. It's weird when it was I think the only thing about the butter knife that's weird is that I kept it at my toolbell. Yeah. Do you have a lot of tools to fit? I do. I have too many. I have way too many. I guess you're going to put me on the spot. The last thing I fixed was, um, dinner.

No, uh, and that's not even true. And that's not even true. And that's not even true. He does not fix dinner. He orders it in from freaking door dash or somebody else makes it 100%. Sometimes I'll walk and go get it. You really want to know. That's doing it yourself.

Yeah, well, no, the last thing I fixed, I fixed the dryer one time. that was a while ago and then I told you about the the piss hole that was a whole fucking problem I did not fix that I tried my hardest to fix that yeah you got to go to a urologist for that

no that's a different thing no I'm saying that I that you know the do you have basements with holes in the floor up there Kevin in Canada I'm sure there's some yeah but you know what I'm talking about like all's no but where the wash of

where the washer drains in the hole. Right? Oh, okay. No, ours. Yeah. I know what you mean, but yeah. Yeah. I used to pee in that hole.

It's a thing we do down here. A lot of us do. Like most men. So when you have one. And I used to pee in that hole. And then one day I went down there. My fucking landlord left a fuse box, a plastic fuse box laying on the floor by the peahole.

And I'm fucking standing. in there pissing. And I don't know why. There must have been some kind of tremor, earthquake situation or something, but the damn thing starts coming down and I can see it going down towards that hole.

And it goes in the hole. And I'm like, I got to get that out of the hole. But I just peed in that hole. You were peeing in that place and you didn't, in this home and you didn't even own it. No, it's my landlord's house.

So I'm peeing in this hole. And then I, and now I'm like, well, now I'm going to have to stick my hand down in this hole. that I peed in. So I tried, which is disgusting. Why are you telling this story? Have you heard that?

This is my DIY. No, I mean, I have heard it, but I'm just curious why you're telling you. Well, I made a spear. In the end, I made a spear. It didn't work, but it was a really smart move on my part that I did. And I ruined my brother's shop back. That was it. That's the last thing I tried to fix.

Not a success. But I did stuff. I helped. I didn't do that either. Never mind. What about you, CJ? What's the last thing you fixed? Nothing.

What's the last thing that I fixed? I mean, I'm not a big fix-it kind of guy either, but I definitely have. There are definitely, now I rent, so there's not, you know, but I'm trying to think of what. We've troubleshooting issues on the stream, and we do it every single week. We fix that thing. Yeah. Yeah, that's true. Every Sunday, I mean, listen.

Every Sunday at 803, we're saying, am I loud enough? I will say that I have definitely fixed a lot of, you know, I mean, I audit the audio of this podcast. So, I mean, if it depends on how, listen, I know that's not what you're talking about. I will get back to you. By the end of this episode, I will, I will have something that I have fixed physically. I promise. Let's get to some posts. This is off R slash D.I.Y. And I, I think I pulled this because it happened to me, first of all. So sharp spike strips on the stairs. My family and I recently moved into a rental that just had new carpet installed. Several times now, while going up the stairs either the kids or I have stepped on something sharp that felt like a pinprick.

Finally, last night, after my son said the stairs made his foot bleed, I spent some time feeling around the stairs. It appears that there are the top edge of each step where the next step forms. The carpet must be held in place by some sort of spike strip, except that the spikes are bit too long and you can feel them with your hands and especially your feet. Is this normally how carpet is laid on stairs? Did the installers do something incorrectly or take a shortcut? Just wanted to ask before I consider mentioning it to the landlord. That's totally normal. That's completely normal.

Yeah, everybody gets their, gets bleeding feet when they walk on stairs. Have you never noticed that? Yeah, they're called footstabbers. Asking if that's normal is funny. I mean, yeah, if it is creating a situation where your child's feet are bleeding, you'd have to assume that that's not really par for the course. No, and I had that happen in my bedroom. I kept doing it.

I'm walking. I'm like, fuck it. stepped on something sharp attack and then i looked down there wouldn't be anything there how long did that go on for like the first three months i lived here and then finally i got down on my hands and knees i got on the floor i prayed to jesus no i got down on the floor i started feeling around with my hands as soon as i found the thing that was stabbing me i grabbed a hammer and smashed it down that's how i fixed it that's that's d i that's d i thank you what took four minutes is the thing first reply goes, I own my house, but the builders used cheap, thin carpet, and I had the same issue.

I went back and forth across the tax strips, tap, tapping the sharp tips with a hammer. They bend over and disappear pretty easily. Whole staircase took 10 to 15 minutes. Guy replies, this is the easiest solution, have done the same. And then the next guy goes, thing is, if you're renting, if you're renting the time and effort shouldn't be your responsibility. O.P. should inform their landlord of this issue before moving. being forward to fix their own problem. Now, 100% of the time I'm going to agree with that.

I'm not going to say somebody's wrong. You know what I'm saying? But this is one of those problems like you call the landlord and it's going to take them two days to get over there and work on this thing. Just fix it yourself. It's the most obvious fix in the world. Yeah. How many times do your child's feet need to bleed before you get that hammer?

It's true. you're right it's not that's one you should be able to figure out you don't have to be a handyman you don't have to be like you could just you could figure out how to deal with something like that not only that you should want to figure it out yeah because you shouldn't want to even wait it's you should want to get that dealt with immediately yeah you should want to get that taken care of so this next guy goes technically yes but a quick fix that improves your quality of life can be worth doing on your own now here comes a big huge fucking lie that's what you're why I cut this out because of this big, huge, fucking silly lie.

A trick that worked well for me in the past in this type of situation is to offer to fix the problem for the landlord at minimum wage plus supplies. I tell the landlord, I will send him a bill, and if he thinks it's inflated, he doesn't have to pay. What? Great line. If you fix something for free and the landlord is unaware and it's not grateful, and is not grateful, if you fix it for much less than they could get it fixed, they think you're a wonderful

tenant and give you a little money. If you're dealing with corporate managed property, this probably won't work. Now, there's so many things here that are not true. First of all, you shouldn't call your landlord, your landlord is never going to pay you to fix something in their apartment. It's just not a thing that happens, especially, then you say minimum wage, and then you say, I'm going to invoice you, if you feel it's inflated, you don't have to pay me. I think a lot of these landlords with an invoice. Yeah, a lot of the ladies landlords I've met, they would probably just say, hey, I believe if this is inflated and I'm not going to pay it. Even if they didn't think it was,

they would just see that as an easy opportunity to not pay it. Well, I don't like landlords at all. But if I was one, I would definitely be like, seems like you're, you know, you did too much. I would say this is, I would say, wait, so the options are to pay you money or to tell you that this is inflated?

I'm going to tell you it's inflated. Genius negotiator this guy. Then a guy goes, you're telling the landlord up front that all I have to do in order to not pay you is to make a false claim of inflation. Yeah, there you go. You have a more reasonable landlord than some, I guess, and he replies and goes, both parties are taking a small risk.

I would only let them say no or not pay once. And if I would do it for free anyway, I've lost nothing. If they pay once, it'll likely lead to an excellent relationship with the landlord. I don't believe that even. Like, I think you have the landlord an invoice and he immediately hate you and is waiting for It's how it needs to be over. Maybe that's wrong, though. Maybe that's how you create the ultimate symbiotic relationship with your landlord.

Maybe that's the big issue is that you're just giving them money and they need to maybe be giving you some money back and then you don't feel so bad about it. Yeah, I work for my landlord now. Not only do I live in the house and pay him money to live in a house. I work for him. It's great. But he pays me some of my money. Maybe.

Like it's your money that he's paying you too, if you really think about it. Oh, he does. He adds you a little bit of your money back. Yeah. Has anybody that's ever rented in the history of the world gotten any break on their rent ever for something happening? I say no. Never. I've never gotten a break on my rent. I've never gotten a break on my rent. I pulled the property records paid money to pull the land title of the apartment I lived in so I could find the name of the actual landlord who owned it and contacted him directly.

and asked him if I could please break my lease because they were building a restaurant underneath me and I couldn't record and it was a nightmare and he agreed. Wow. But I think he was more just a little bit sort of, I don't know if he was like, I think he was kind of like,

hey, how'd you get my number? You know, how'd you find me? I think there was a little bit of that going on too, you know, where he was kind of, but yeah, that was probably my best interaction I've had with the landlord, I think. I mean, you made him uncomfortable. Yeah, I think that was what it was.

Yeah, yeah. this guy goes, I've been paid each time a landlord has agreed to the deal. No shit, dude. He agreed to the fucking deal. The last time we painted the dining room in exchange for paint, et cetera, and them having the kitchen professionally painted. We did a better job than the pro, and the landlord knows and appreciates it. So the guy replies, he goes, why would you do this?

You paid for repairs to the landlord's property? That's not the renter's responsibility. So he replies and goes, It is absolutely the landlord's responsibility. They would discharge that responsibility by paying me money to fix it. I get the money. I get the job done immediately and I get it done correctly. If I don't want to fix something, I tell the landlord and does it quick, does it quick.

No one, I don't bug him for trivial shit. None of this is true. Nothing this guy is saying happens. Not one thing. It's impossible. I've never had a landlord like that. in my life, I've never had a landlord that's like me and him, oh, we're cool, man, because I don't call them when things fucking go wrong.

It's like my landlord used to fucking get so mad at me when I tried to fix stuff. And I did it a lot. Well, like, stuff. Yeah, I can't. Why were you always having to fix your toilet? All of your DIY bricks are pistolated. Do I, no, not piss. Let's be clear.

Kevin, I don't think he's, I don't think he's, I don't think he's, This is breaking the toilet. He's got a little bit of a reputation of a bit of a toilet wrecker. Boop guy. So that is really funny to hear you say that you're having to constantly fix your toilet. I fix toilet problem. I know how to fix a toilet problem. I had to go, like there were, I did at times.

Sorry to cut you off, but I would feel like, yeah, as far as DIY stuff goes, that would be your specialty. to your area of expertise would be toilets. Yeah. I can fix the shit out of a toilet, literally. I mean, there were times, though, where it got a little gross,

but I didn't want to call a landlord. Because one, the apartment I was living in on that time was a one bedroom or one bathroom. So it's like, this toilet's got to get fixed. My landlord's a doomsday prepper, and he lives like an hour away.

So he's not going to drive down. He has to. I understand it, but it would have been a whole issue to get them down. You were renting from a doomsday prepper? Yeah. You didn't know that? No, no. I didn't know that.

Well, they lived in my neighborhood when I moved in. Mm-hmm. And then they moved out to the middle of nowhere and started telling me all the stuff they were doing out there. And it sounded like they were doing a lot of doomsday prepping. You know quite a few. You just know quite a few doomsday preppers. I live in Ohio. central Ohio. I got you. Because I don't really know any, I don't think, you know.

Never matter. That's crazy. So anyway, uh, yeah. And so sometimes the toilet would, the toilet would get like a little bit clogged and I'd have to fix it. And I, I, I just know how to do it. I bought like, like a plunger though. Oh, are we talking? Beautiful plunger. Like beyond plunging. I have a plunger that you wish you had. It fixes clogs. It's the best plunger on the market. I can guarantee, it's like black and it's like this big and it's got a couple different moves you can do with it. And it has this. It's like a when you pump the T&T, one of those handles.

You're really, wow. It's got a double. It's got a double handle. That's a big handle. It's double ended. Okay. That's interesting. Yeah.

Yeah. That's cool. That's cool. So you, this is like for serious, this is for like, People who have like issues with their relationship to toilets on a regular toilets. Here, let's go to one of these ones. There's plenty of guys on here with toilet issues. That's like the main DIY thing in a place to live.

What are the other DIY things? I mean, I, yeah, I mean, I could. Toilet would be the main thing I think you would have issues with the only, right? Not the only. I would think there would be other. Yeah, what? Heat. But that doesn't ever break.

Maybe the stove, maybe the stove, perhaps, like the. or the stove? R minded ones, but rarely. It's minded as well. That's why I said that one, because that's the one that happened to me. Brother, this is from R-S-D-U-I.

He goes, DUI. Now that's an episode. Oh, yeah, that'd be a funny one. We have great fun with it. I know a lot of those guys. Brother literally,

you want to know something I know more than Tuesday prefer? Can I be honest, Brian? I know a couple of those guys, unfortunately, too. grew up with a few of those fellas as well. Brother literally shit bricks and now the toilet barely flushes, tried plunger and auger. What to do now?

So basically my brother took a massive dunce, clog the toilet, not even the best plunger action made any difference. He probably didn't have my plunger. I'll tell you that right now. We went and got a toilet auger and that helped and now the toilet barely flushes. This guy crapped.

So it's still just sitting in there like clog it up. Like, it's in the pipes. Is it too much paper? Because like, I, like, I'm a, I'm a big man. I've never shit so much that the shit clogged the toilet. I can't overwipe once in a while. I think what you're, what's happening here? Yeah.

Oh, Brian has. I think you, Kevin, you're like, you're a big guy, but I don't think all big guys are laying down like these jik. There's other factors as well. And I think that you're not laying down like as big of shits as these as like, Brian, I like, I would put Brian up against you. I don't do it every time. It's like every once in a while. So I think these guys are doing bigger shit. You're like, oh, I'm doing huge shit and they're flushing fine. I think these guys are doing bigger, huge or ones than you like double the size and

shit. And it's also. I have to go like I don't, I can't go every day is the consistency. It's a consistency as well if it's not soft at all. Well, that's, well, here's the thing. That's why I got such a big plunger because then I can break them apart with the plungeer. You know what I mean? God. Yeah, no, it's a huge, it's like a crazy, like, it would be like a good. If I have to break it apart with the plunger, that's what I can do. And that fixes the problem. What better than not.

You like, you just, you just hit it with the like edges of the blunder. Of course. Yes. Don't you. But how do you never? I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I think it has too big in it. I don't. I, I, I, I think it has made.

happened once in my life when I was like in my 20s but yeah I don't remember I don't remember having to break it up and do all that kind of stuff the dainty Canadian episode a little dainty boys I don't think by any means that I take dainty just I think I take normal ones like I really do I've seen them on TV I've seen them on TV and stuff and I think mine are normal side puts his little pinky out when he wipes his ass just the dainties like a little prints brother I got a bidet my friend me too better than not flood at all, though. We can only take a leak in the toilet, so we need to fix this. So it's basically a pissed toilet now after what his brother did. So yeah, it's become a number one only toilet.

My brother came over and turned my toilet into number one only. Like, I feel like, why are they, like, they just don't want to call a plumber? He's like, what do I do? Like, um, call a plumber. It's one of the most evil things that, like, I think, I don't know, it's probably, the same out there. People are more scared, people are scared of car mechanics. Plumbers. Yeah.

Like those are classically the guys that rip you off. I see. You know what I mean? I never thought of, I guess, plumbers that way. I'm trying to think of the interactions. I've had one set my,

when I was living like one of my first places at a studio, I did flush something down the toilet that like fuck the toilet up. Like it wasn't my shit. It was something else. It was like a foreign object. Was it number one?

Sorry? Was it number one? Did my pee clog the toilet? You got chunky pee? No, it was a foreign object. I don't recall what it was, but it was like, you know, something I knocked in there or whatever,

and then I just flush it because I was all stoned or something. Not only shampoo, probably. I was like, they had like the handyman who was like the building handyman, you know, who came by and he fixed it. And I was like, he was, I was cool with him. So he like pulled it out and he's just like,

I'm going to let you, fly like you know he's like a police officer he's like i'm gonna let you go this time like with a warning or whatever but like next time this is like on you like big charge keep your hat keep your hats out of the toilet my hat i think it's your hat a hat wouldn't fit down the little hole you're standing up when you're going on the bathroom and you leaned down and your hat fell off of you flushed it and i flushed what i didn't even try to why didn't i pick it up if i didn't you thought it was pee I see. Anyway, better than not flushing at all, though.

We can only take a leak in a toilet, so we need to fix this. What is the next step? Drano? Absolutely not. That is an absolute no, 100% of the time. Why? How come you don't want to put a bunch of corrosive shit down your toilet? I mean, you don't want to just pour a big jug full?

I think, like, Drano can work and, you know, on like, I don't think, I don't know about toilets. I don't think it's not for toilet. You should not Bordredo down it. I'm not a toilet all the time. I've done it before. I've done it before on a clogged pipe, you know, like in a sink. I've done it before. Right.

But if somebody has to work on the clogged pipe, then there's acid in there. Yeah. Is the thing. But I get what you're saying. We used to have to get our, our fucking tubs unplugged from hair every two months because my landlord wouldn't fix the pipes. Anyway, he goes, is there something that'll dissolve the mass that is clogging the pipes? First question is pictures.

This happens to me all the time. All the time. This is crazy. Yeah. And like some of the solutions here are some of the craziest shit I've ever heard. I've never heard these solutions. I mean, that must be fucking so horrible, though, if you just keep clogging your toilet up with your mass of shit. And it's like become a huge headache in your life because you're shitting too big.

And you have like a process. Yeah. You know the. Hey, Susie. Hey, Susie. It's Brad again. He goes, I let the stool soften up a bit in the water, then plunge like crazy. Remember, it's not the downstroke that is effective.

It's the vacuum caused by the upstroke that dislodges the turn. Yeah. Plunge your physics. Well, this guy goes, try this. Pour one to two cups of dishwashing soap in the toilet. Let it sit for about 10 minutes. Then pour a boiling pot of water in the toilet. It's worked like a charm for us.

Now, this is the core of DIY guys you're about to hear. This is what they are. Watch this. Okay. Couldn't boiling water potentially crack the ceramic? It's ceramic. Like a giant and disgusting coffee cup. It'll have no trouble with the heat unless it's very cold to start with.

The pipes won't have problems with it. People dump the boiling water from pasta and hard boiled eggs down the sink all the time. Next guy. Just those two things. Next guy. It could crack the ceramic and could also damage the pipes under the house. Those pipes are only designed to handle cold water and such. So now we're you should do this.

No, you shouldn't. It'll destroy your entire house or don't want you're going to be. Like you don't want to do. Someone's coming in saying this is the best thing you can do in this situation. And then another person saying this is actually the worst thing you can do in this situation in every way. Your house will light on fire. Yeah, you can find that a hundred times over.

Whereas somebody is just suggesting something that somebody's saying, if you do this, you'll lose your family to the courts. Your house will be taken away from you. Someone's like, you have to do this or you will die. This is the thing. This guy goes two cups. That's quite a bit. I use a few squirts couple with baking soda and a pint of vinegar.

Wash down with boiling water once the bubbling stops. Last mega turn ended up. This guy's making a, this guy's freaking making a goddamn, you know, a potion in his cauldron. He's bubbling up a potion. Two cups of dish soap is an insane amount of dish soap to. That's like, that's so, that's so, that's so much. Yeah.

That is so much. Like, so much. That's almost an entire bottle, right? I really hit the tea on bottle there, but. Yeah, that's so. You're totally right. That is the most dish soap you would ever, you, like, I can't even imagine what that. does to anything.

Like, what does that look like? When it mixes with water. Yeah, when you put all that boiling water, does it not like bubble up super? Like, when you put, can I say this? When you put vinegar and baking soda in it,

I think we all know what that does. Yeah. Do you make the volcanoes in elementary school? You mix vinegar with baking soda. So somebody maybe doing a joke with that one, try to get people to do an exploding toilet. Fetalwama. Katie tries to do vinegar and baking soda on everything in this house.

Anytime something goes wrong. She's like, have you tried vinegar and baking soda? And I'm like, that's a fucking volcano. It doesn't fucking work. But maybe it does. Now I kind of try. Oh, why you're taking her side all of a sudden? I don't know.

I've met her and I've met you. I met her. He's wrong. I, no, I think that. I talk to all the time. I mean, I just wonder about that too because it would be a really funny, you know, if you could get some cachet in the community and then you go in there and you start doing stuff like, you know, have you tried putting some Mentos and some Pepsi in there? You know what it? Yeah, yeah, that's what it sounds like. Right. Just like getting people to like fuck all their shit of.

Listen to this guy. Listen to this guy. Try filling up a large bucket with water. Raise it as high as you can above the toilet bowl. This guy's got to be doing it. I hope he is because I'll tell you what, that's the nightmare. The scariest thing in a world when you clog a toilet is when you flush it, it starts to go up and it's starting to get close to the thing. That is the worst feeling you can have. Yeah.

I can't think of a worst feeling. He goes, try filling up a large bucket with water, raise it as high as you can above the toilet bowl and pour the water in as quickly as you can. This should create a huge amount of force which might unclog the toilet. Oh, so he's like this is like a, you're water bombing this thing. So you're like, you got to get up like on the side of the tub maybe. You know what I mean? Like you got it for like extra high.

Try to get up as close as you can to the ceiling. So you can get extra velocity on that. Well, then this guy goes just a good way to have a bowl full of poop and water. And then he gets a reply. It says works in some situations. So they never figured it out. I think they needed to call a plumber is what I would say. I think oftentimes you're going to find at the end of these threads is,

uh, the answer is to, yeah, unfortunately to call a profession. to fix the thing. The story never ends happily. I'm going to show you guys a picture right now because this guy, he made a library for his wife. Oh. Just, you know, nice little library.

It's kind of nice. It's like a built-in kind of like shelving, white shelving unit. It looks quite nice. I have some bad news for you. The subrated did not like this. Oh. It just looks really. It looks really.

Yeah, it looks really. quite nice little wicker baskets to the bottom. Yeah, very normal and very like, I would say, it didn't seem, it could be controversial anyway, very plain normal. You don't know anything. This guy goes kind of expected a library to have more books. Without books, it's just shelves. Well, maybe they haven't filled it out yet.

Next guy? Yeah, this looks great, but it's not a library. Oh, they're getting hung up on. Did he say it was a lot? He said it was a library. He said I made a library, DIY library for the wife. That was his big mistake. That's his big mistake there is he tried to be a little bit playful with the language.

I suppose. Well, they're not done. Guy goes for sure. They're really nice looking shelves. And then the next guy goes and 43 lovely looking books. Counted him. That guy counted them. That's a guy that's living the big life.

Yeah. So, yeah. 43 books. He counted. He's yelling at his wife in the other room. 43 this lady's got. Ridiculous. It's, um, this poor guy, though, you know what I mean?

He's just like sitting there. He's like another, he's like, oh, I got another reply here on the, oh, I see. Okay. I was just trying to have a little bit of fun, uh, show off my, you know, like he really, he's, I don't know, maybe he's a part of this community, but he couldn't have expected this, right? He just thought he was no way expected to get this kind of response to saying, I built this, you know, nice thing for my wife.

Maybe he built it for his wife to read or Kindle. And the Harry Potter series doesn't count as the next one. So that actually doesn't count as books. I don't know how many books that is, but that puts you under 40 at that point. Yeah, there's a lot of Harry Potter books. And this guy goes, I only found 38. So he only found 38 books.

Oh, now it's become kind of one of those, like, you know, those images that they pose. Like, how many of these can you find, you know? Like, find all the mistakes or whatever. Now people are like counting them out and actually arguing over the amount of books. This guy goes, what's the point in having seven new bookshelts if you don't have 2,000 books? This guy goes, there's 42 books that I count in 30 shells. Okay, well, 42, that's the highest.

That's the highest number we've seen. Is it or no? What was the other one? Well, that's 42. 42's the number. You know what I mean? That's the max number. Other guys are saying 36.

But some of them aren't counting the Harry Potter books. Oh, the Harry Potter books are. there? Yeah, it's a negative on them. This guy goes, what, what, what Kevin, sorry? Why would, why would the Harry Potter books not be counted? Sorry, they're not, uh, well, they're kind of being like, you know what I mean? These are people who are, they're kind of well read. So that in the way that like, they're movie books kind of or whatever, or who knows, maybe it's because they hate J.K. Rowling for her terrible politics. Who knows? But they're basically saying like, oh, tongue in cheek, those don't count. What about this guy? They should. They

should in my in my book those count 100% I don't judge books because they're books at the end of the day physical books I hate her too but they're books you can't argue with that's unfortunate there's 42 books that I count in 30 shelves that's not a library that shelves with books is decorating elements oh guys guys I'm sorry I'm really getting annoyed I'm getting really angry about this because he didn't he wasn't being serious he didn't really think he built the library for his wife. I believe he did. This guy goes,

this is a library. Then every room in my apartment's a library. Yeah, fine, you can call it that. Yeah, great. You've got so many libraries,

dude. Congratulations. Congratulations. This one, Brian, I don't know why. This one's really getting me. I only have one room in my apartment,

but it's also a library. It's, how many more, how many do, how many replies did you? A lot of people call a room like this, the quote library. It's like a sitting area, but with shelves.

We had a quote library when I grew up on a farm, but the shelves had books and guns. There's not even any guns in your library. This guy replies to a lot of people call a room like this, the library. This guy replies and goes, Interior quote designers, maybe, not people who read. They don't have a place to put so many books before.

Now they have room to grow. They got to get a full set of hardcover Harry Potter, though. That would, that would, that would bother me so much. So yes, one of the Harry Potter books is missing, too. It's the middle book in the series, they're saying. And this guy goes, they also need to find a photograph for the picture frame

that shows the placeholder image in it. All that worked to hold a bunch of goofy shit from Pier 1. Ugh. I came here angry that a quote library is barely any books made the front page angrier that the books it does have are fucking decorative and I'm satisfied that this was the top comment. So just to be clear, that person was like, this is so annoying that the people even care about this story

and it's made the front page. Like, what an annoying, nothing of a story? And then went to read it and got annoyed at a different specific part of it. This guy goes, I have more books on my bedside table. I doubt it. How big is your bedside on your bedside? You're just stacked up. 43 books on your bedside.

43 books on your bedside table. That's fucking weird. Even if we get rid of Harry Potter, that's still an absurd amount of books. Yeah, like, and a bedside table, like, yeah, who knows? Maybe he's like, oh, this is my bedside table. And it's just a mini bookshelf. And it's like, well, you're not fooling anyone. That's a bookshelf that you're just calling a bedside table.

Yet I still have more books lying around my bedroom. So they're just on the floor? Oh, you should build a library. Like this guy did. I mean, if you have over 40 books, just laying around your room, you are not keeping your, you need to talk to Jordan B. Peterson. Yeah, you're a problem. And finally, this guy goes, a copy of purpose driven life and three bound copies of Reader's Digest does not make a library. That's so good to be zooming in and

looking at the titles to roast this guy who built this nice thing for his wife. I mean, hey, listen, I can't, that's what we do. You know what I mean? We do a very similar thing, but so. I think we are on the right side with this one. Of course, everyone does. That a guy that says, everyone who does something like this thing.

Yeah. It says it's a library. Fine, it's a library. We don't have to fight about this. No, that's true. It had so many comments,

Chris, and none of them. Not a single, like there's maybe two positive ones. That we're just like, hey, this looks nice. Well,

in all fairness, I think- 496 replies to that thread. And I'd say four, 150 of them were negative. Half of a thousand people came to tell him, hey, that hell is up, this ain't no library.

I, yeah, I feel like he could take some solace in the fact that a lot of the comments were like, the shelves look nice, but. Yes. So, right, he can take that, be like, hey, that's the part I'm worried about, hey, even the people who are haters who clearly don't like me, they even

had to agree that the shelving looked pretty damn good. I got pretty excited about this. This guy goes, had 11 days to make over my room with the wife and kids out of town nine sheets of plywood later i'm pretty pleased we got the picture for you guys to look at i'll make it the picture for the episode it's this room right got some phillips hue in there i mean that's a that's that's that can you pull it back up yeah so that that's uh it appears to be in some sort of like a sex club or something like this is their home that's their house that's where that's where that's what's that's

If you're not looking at the image, if you're just listening to this and you don't have the image yet, the lighting is what really kind of makes it. But I can't really. Kind of looks like a playroom to tell you. It looks like a playroom, but it has just blackout blinds and then it has some weird. I'm guessing the plywood is the thing he did behind the bed. I believe it is and I don't know what it is. It kind of looks like a teaky lounge or something maybe. I don't know.

Sure. It doesn't look good. No. It looks really bad. But I would say it looks really like. tacky or whatever. And he did this while his wife was out of town. Yeah, but she's going to come home. Yeah, but I wonder if that's the case. He did the whole the lighting and stuff. Like, imagine the rest of their house just looks totally normal, like a classic sort of like. And then he's just like,

all right, I'm going to put my fucking stamp on this room. And it's just completely, I imagine that his wife is okay with this stuff. Like the other stuff kind of looks like this. I very, very, much. I'll say a thing I love is there's more guys zooming in on this. It's like the last one, right? This guy goes, I think you should check for a leak in your roof slash ceiling.

Where that paint did not stick slash peeled, especially in a corner like that. New paint doesn't peel that quickly under normal circumstances. And the fact that it only happened in that one spot leads me to believe you might have a problem. What did you get up to today, honey? I helped some guy out with an issue

he was having to have it with his house. that's so good to go to yeah because that I do love that's that's such a DIY guy and I do I have like a love for that that's almost like endearing to me that person who's just like all right here's a post to somebody's room let's give it a quick scan and make sure everything's okay like you know it's like it's his duty to do this like he's like he's compulsive with it he has to do it for himself obviously but he is possibly helping others it's fun you're right it is so funny to like get i'm going to go to r slash DIY i'm going to zoom in on all the pictures and see if everybody's doing okay what am i up to tonight honey uh oh i'm going to i'm just doing a bit of zoom and one this is not a library two your pain is peeling three you got to get a new toilet this guy goes uh that's a very unique style and then which means it's ugly. Oh. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's a nice person. That's a nice person saying like this is

horribly ugly or whatever. Yeah. This guy goes, why do I feel like this is going to end like the time my mom went away and my dad spent an obscene amount of money building a fake wall and building six foot fish tanks to build into it? Uh, replies and goes, so your wife knows your Reddit. A Reddit knows your name. This is most Redders are Redditors or Redditors worst nightmare. Now that is funny. My wife knows my Reddit names in everybody that's, been on Reddit knows. As soon as you click a person's name, it says this is NSFW, and you can see all the porno that they like.

Oh, yeah, you can see everything. Like, there's been some good videos I've seen on YouTube, even of like comedians with like a Reddit account, and they don't realize that. And it's just kind of like, you can click their name. It's got all their replies to like big booty. Like, you know, it's just like, hey, sweetie. So it's definitely something people aren't aware of sometimes for sure.

Yeah. I'm a fan of your woodworking. It's such a cool thing to build something for yourself, no matter what people, how people think it looks. I love that line. Perfect. It's invented and sized by you and your needs. And you get a play with power tools.

I need to build more stuff. So this guy's like, he knows it's ugly. You know what I mean? Yeah. It's like, you know what? It's ugly, but you made it. And that's all that counts. Yeah, man, you did the work.

It looks like shit. Your life is your life and relationships. going to suffer as a result of this fucking abomination, but buddy, it's an abomination that you did with your own two hands. You completely ruined your bedroom with your wife and she's going to come home and she's going to see this and she's going to want it ripped down. And it looks terrible and you're going to look at it every day and feel like a little bit less of a man because it's a horrible job you did. But it's a horrible job that you did.

You did the blueprint for this. You did this. You did this. I mean, listen, that person's trying to be positive and say, hey, you know, you put the work in and you finished it. But yeah, obviously, when you're talking about that's like, oh, you know, I made a, I was making a little dirt bike in the back or something. And I, it kind of fucked it up and it kind of looked shit. You know, like this is, this is your bedroom. Here's a guy. You have to sleep there every night. This guy said, you did good work.

But for my taste, this looks like a paid by the hour, no-tel motel room off the Vegas strip. Yeah. I think that does that that's that's a good description of it. Yeah. Now, this guy I am very into just the way that he attacks this is nuts. Just get rid of the ridiculous covers and lamp as well as that print above the bed. Get some real pillows as well as some extra throw pillows for decor. And add a few more pops of color.

Too much bare wood color. Better print on the wall for sure. Art needs some assistance unless you really love the Grateful Dead-esque stuff. swap out the headboard for something of... You mean the stuff that he chose to put up in there? Yeah, he probably likes it. If you like this shit, then...

If you like this awful shit you picked to put up, then I guess go with that. But if you want some better stuff... If this isn't just some stuff you found in your basement... Yeah, I guess he probably likes it a little bit. Yeah, this is good though, Brian. You're right. It's like this guy who's just like...

He knows it all's got to go. He's trying to help. It's all got to go, but he's... He's like trying to, instead of just being like, this is shit, he's like, hey, this is, hey, we got a good foundation work. We just got to change this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, this, and it's everything, you know. He says swap out the headboard for something of fabric, maybe even leather.

Again, too much unfinished wood. Uh, right now looks like a weird cross between Bill Nye's childhood bedroom, a fish concert. I don't know, and a tie massage parlor where they do happy endings. I didn't know, do, are we supposed to know Bill Nye's? childhood bedroom looks like? Perfectly normal childhood bedroom. I mean, is that a significant thing? Was it on his show or something?

Anyways. You guys both do stand-up. It's a riff. Oh, I see. Oh, I see. But, okay, you know, I guess I didn't figure it up. Oh, this looks like Bill Nye's childhood bedroom. Oh, it's kind of like one of those things.

Like a sex club? Yeah, I see. It's one of those things just like stand-ups do where they like come into the, Kevin. Yeah, Kevin and I used to try. boards together. I don't know what you're thinking, Chris. I look like the love child of Sheneyto O'Connor and Tom Caira.

Yeah, exactly. That's pretty good. That is the thing. That is so, that's what he's doing. But instead, it's like, like, like, like I said, he's like, no,

they'll do that for the, they'll do that for the location, too, comedians. Not just the, like, they'll literally come in, you know, it's like, well, I'm so happy to be performing in the fucking

basement. you know, like in like whatever, like somebody's sex dungeon or something, you know, like they'll make that joke about the venue as well. It is like, yeah, this, that, this person, honestly, they might be one of the 250 assassins. They might be one of our fellow stand-up comedy brethren, actually. I'd love to see this guy on Kill Tony. Oh, I'd love to see anybody on Kill Tony. I watch every week. It's my favorite show. I'd love to watch literally anybody and I do. I watch, I haven't, I used to watch Kill Tony. I like William Montgomery. William Montgomery is one of the top touring acts

And You know I know he's struggled He's had a couple of sets where That a really bad one Yeah it's really funny when those kill We've talked about we love Kill Tony on this show We'd love to talk about Kill Tony And the yeah

When those killers are Kill Tony Sometimes step outside of the Kill Tony Comedy Mothership Zone Because their character on that show, right? And then it's like, oh, if you don't know that show, then you're like, oh, this guy's, this, so this guy's like a lunatic or whatever. And he's like, the stuff he's saying is like, it doesn't really make sense or not supposed to be funny or something.

And you don't really get it. And it's, I think probably pretty bad. This guy has to be a comedian though or as a comedy fan because he goes, I expect a masse to sit at that little desk and do her makeup in a mirror before she brings me to completion with a squirt bottle of K.Y. tucked by her waist. So that sounds like stand up comedy stuff. Yeah, he's doing a rift there.

He's getting really into the detail. He's making sure you know, like, hey, I have been to a rub and tug before. I know all of the information. I've been jerked off in a massage bar. I know all the fucking lingo and stuff. I'm not, uh, yeah. I feel like a lot of masseuses are not sitting down at a table to apply makeup right before they whack you off to. Yeah.

Well, some of me. He's like, she sits at the little table and puts on her makeup right before. That's a known thing. He's, he's thinking of strippers. he's thinking the stripper at the in the like in that back room where they're all at the you know and they're like getting themselves ready and then he's sort of conflating it a little bit i think listen it's not a perfect riff Kevin it's not a perfect riff by any means he's he's not he's not yeah but he's the one thing we got to give him credit for he is riffing for sure and can I say this too we just tore his post apart like he tore that guy's room apart so it kind of feels good we helped him out we're on the right side of history and that's regard. This guy goes really interesting. Finally we're on the right side of history and one. Really interesting project, but I'm positive my wife would take one look, turn around and leave for another 11 days after telling me to tear all of that down. Uh, this guy goes, the effort

and workmanship seems decent, but it looks like the bedroom, a 16 year old from 1975 would imagine. Then finally a guy goes, I was thinking a movie set from a clockwork orange. Okay. So now we're getting, now we're going. Now we're cooking. Now we're cooking. response to this and he goes, I'll take that as a compliment. We like a little bit of the unusual. Yeah, I figured that. That's what I'm saying. I think that I don't think this is going to make his wife upset.

I don't think that's the thing we're dealing with here. I think his wife is like this is the type. I think they might be sex like pineapple lifestyle people. I know I know we often do that. We watch a lot of swinger stuff. So we'll often just like see it where it is. But I think these people are swingers actually. All right.

came up with a, let me look at this here. So this guy came up with a process and this is very weird. And people were kind of like, so I'm going to read you this guy. I've always enjoyed building little systems to stay organized. And after struggling to juggle all the home maintenance request for my wife, I finally built one that actually works. Wanted to share the setup in case anyone else is in the same boat. Not sure if anyone else deals with this, but my wife tends to bring up home repair and maintenance request throughout the week, almost always when I'm not prepared to take the request. At first, I tried writing things down, then texting myself, then putting a sticky note on the fridge. None of it stuck, so I ended up building a little system using CODA. Here's how it works.

She fills out a simple form when something comes up. The requests go into a private dashboard where I detail, approve, prioritize, and eventually activate them. You can see here that I've not yet taking a look at the sandbox request and that out of the request I have approved, they're grouped by priority. Once I'm ready to take more on, usually not more than three to five active projects at a time, I activate it, which allows me to add detailed steps and their statuses. From there, I have a table as a top of the front page that quickly displays all the tasks that I can do. I also have a reporting page to automatically show me how much I'm getting done week over week. it actually been super helpful for staying on top of the house stuff without getting overwhelmed plus

it cut down on the did you see my text about the garage convo's i figured i'd share the concept in case anyone else wants to build something familiar if you're not if you're interested in the setup or want to see how i structured it happy to share more in the comment so this guy he's a DIY productivity guy we learned about productivity guys we've done productivity guys so we know this this guy's a productivity guy as well what what kind of what is it that he's that he's that he's building. Oh, it's just a database. Oh,

it's a place for his wife to fill out a requisite form to get some chores done around the house. So first his wife fills out a form. Okay. And he puts it in a thing on a table and then he approves it or denies it. And then once he's approved it, he puts it into another spreadsheet where he has it. And he's like, these are the steps I have to do to make this happen. And that apparently has helped him quite a bit.

now if I told my wife to fill out of form she would not do that I can fucking guarantee it like any amount of hey can you fill out a form for me like if he denies her the like he's got I know this guy's got stamps too right that one says like he's going to be denied but like if he's what happens to his wife's desires if he keeps denying a certain project over and over again I deny every she can take it to the better business bureau if she's got an issue.

You can report them, obviously, if she's got an issue. So, yeah, can you even imagine? So, Kevin, you're married. You would this, this wouldn't fly. Like, you would be, because I think, like, I mean, Ariel would laugh, like, think I was joking about it, obviously, right? I'm not in a position where I could do something like this and have it even feel like it was in earnest at all. It would feel like I was doing some stupid fucking bit that I'm always doing. With you, it would look like.

like a bit. I agree with that. With me, it would just be like this guy's, Brian's trying to get out of doing work because he knows I'm not going to do this. So if I don't do this, then he can say he doesn't know what's going on. And then boom, he doesn't have to do anything around the house. But you don't, you're not expected to do anything around the house. How dare you? She's asked me to do things in the past. Brian, can you move this thing over there? Take the trash down. That does not sound like a real request you've heard. Yeah, move something. You could. over the example. You couldn't come up with one example of a thing you were asked to do.

Yeah. Move this thing over there was the first example he came up with. It almost does sound like you have literally never been asked to do something and you don't know what you could possibly be asked to do. But you said bring the garbage down. That's different, right? Don't you just like you have chores that you have to do. Oh, I see. I see.

You're like that guy. I don't do anything. I'm going to be honest with you. I don't do a lot of. So you're kind of like that guy. I learned about this guy. He got really owned in a debate. He's this men's rights guy who couldn't open a pickle jar.

I forget what his name is. I can do that. Famously couldn't open a pickle jar. And then he just got into, he got really owned by somebody in a debate recently. But that was the big thing about him. He said, he was like saying as like this alpha male thing.

Like I don't do anything. Like I don't do anything. Like, you know, and his wife is like a public figure too. She's like, I cook for him. I clean for him. I bring him as meal.

and stuff. And it's like, I think I'm obviously not, this is an idea I'm coming up with, but I realize this that like, it's a little baby. Yeah. When, if you're an alpha male guy like that when you got it, you're just in full baby mode your whole life. You have a mama who brings you and does all of your stuff for you. Mommy, can I have eggs? You're, yeah, like, can I like, you all like, you know, like, you make me this. Like, oh, you didn't wash my things properly. Like, you know, like you're just fully in like a child mode for your entire life. I do like seven things around the house. Can you let's hear them?

Number one. You want to hear some? Number one. Some I make the coffee. Make the making coffee. What are you used to grind the beans? Burrinder that I can fix if it breaks. Yeah, good question from Kevin there.

What do you use to grind the beans up? And is it working fine and is it the first one that you've had? It's working. It's working great. Sometimes it clogs because I forget how many cycles I can run it through before it clogs. And once it clogs,

I just take it and I fix it. You don't just, yeah, we, I don't drink coffee Ariel does, but she just uses, she gets ground beans, but you like to grind them up.

I get bean beans because I like to do the whole thing. I weigh it and. Yeah, yeah, I have a coffee guy somewhat. Yeah, no, I know,

I know you are. These days I make, we drank to cap poo coffee together. Yeah, we loved it too. We said it's so good. It tastes like cats. shit and I like the flavor of cat shit.

There's famous coffee, Kevin, that's made out of cat shit. They, like, feed them some stuff and then, you know it, right? No, yeah. We had it. Yeah, we had Chris drank it. We drank it. It's good. Where was it was fine?

It was fine, yeah. Where were you guys drinking the cat shit coffee? Were you on stage? We were on stage at the Biltmore cabaret, actually, Kevin. And Kevin would know that. You've probably been on stage at the Biltmore Cabaret before. Yeah, I used to have a book there. So, yeah, we did, uh, we, we,

we have drank it uh what's the other thing i do sometimes i i run the dish well i make the bed every day okay every single day i yeah i wake up i make the bed that gets done by me katy never does it if she gets up second she leaves it undone and then i go in and do it later on before we go to well she's got to go to work okay we all have to work i i had to work today i'm working right now but she goes to work in the morning is my point right she like gets up and goes to work and goes to work in the morning. Whatever. We all work.

I agree. I'm not saying you don't work. I know you do. You work in a way. I do the dishes. I already said dishes. I agree. Sometimes I vacuum if I make them,

like if I drop some of my candy in the middle of the night, because a lot of times what happens is I'm having my candy in the middle of the night and I drop a little bit on the floor. And I get a lot of grief for that. So I've been trying to clean that up lately. What are you eating in the middle of the night? Candies. No, but what kind of you're like?

This has been a big issue actually in the past. Unfortunately, I'm back on the outrageous bars and ice cream sandwiches both. In the middle of the night, you're going ice cream sandwiches? Sometimes. Sometimes I'll eat two real fast because it makes me cold. My sleep better. Hey. I like being cold when I sleep.

I think everyone. I know that. I understand that. I do feel that. I like, you know, cold side of the pillow. I eat two ice cream sandwiches real quick and then sat by a fan. Listen, I don't have the best diet I don't think in the world, but God, do you ever make me feel like I do, man. I'm off the wagon.

I'm going to tell you all the truth. I'm off the wagon. I got to let you all know. I'm off the wagon. I think Brian, when you said you were eating two ice cream sandwiches in the middle of the night, I think we knew that the wagon is long gone. Those are temperature related. Those are temperature related.

He's trying to cool. Yeah, those are to regulate his temperature. therapeutic. Talking to his doctor. No doc. No doc. Those are to regulate my temperature. Those aren't even calorie base.

That's when I get hot and hungry at night. Those are not even. I don't count those as calories. I take the trash to the rubbish room. No, hang on, Brian. What do you have? Like, what would you say like in the middle of the night you're having as far as two

ice cream sandwiches and more than that? You're really going like. Sometimes. Yeah, I'll have like a couple candy bars. I'm trying to get back off the candy bars. Listen, everybody, don't yell at me. First of all,

it's mid-January i might not even be on the candy bars anymore you don't even know right now i'm on the candy bars well stop i hate when you do that but later on when this show actually comes out you don't know what i'm doing i could be the healthiest guy in town i'm eating broccoli in the middle of the night i really you're eating them so feverishly that you have to vacuum the following day now that's alarming well because i go walking around the house of the candy bar in my hand so my fault like a because the thing i the candy bar i eaters a recess outrageous and what it is is it's reeses and then it's rolled in caramel and then it's got some wafer and then rolled in reeseses pieces it doesn't it doesn't have wafer and then chocolate no rafer so then chocolate so sometimes

we're sitting i'm sitting and eating the thing and the rees pieces fall off on the floor oh it's the rees's pieces i don't see it because it's the middle of the night i get you got a light you got a light you're walking around in the dark eating outrageous bars You're walking out in the pitch black. Eating ice cream sandwich. Looking out the window and his temperature up and the ice cream sandwich brings it down. He's just regulating his body temperature.

He's just keeping it at the exact right temperature. Brian, standing in the dark, in the living room, counting how many cars drive by while I'm awake in the middle of the night because I'm interested in that. I very rarely, because Brian,

you know, he has some like diet stuff or whatever like things that maybe are. I'm insane. They aren't maybe like normal or healthy or whatever. I rarely goof on him a little bit, but I don't really really say anything. But you used to eat six king size caramelo bars in the middle of the night. I'm working my way back, but I only keep four candy bars in the house now. And it became a thing where that was the only thing where he ever told me where I was like,

I sent him a message after the episode, you know, was over. And I was like, hey, man, that's really too much to eat in the middle of the night. You really shouldn't do that. And so I will say, I think that if you can cut out. Four candy bars. No, I know. if you can cut out the, like even if you're just not even eating that well, if you can cut out literally in the middle of the night where you're just not even working off any of the calories

of it, you're just going right back to sleep. I think obviously you know that, but it might be worth like thinking about maybe cutting it down. I'll think about it. I love candy. No, I know. Eat it in the day even. I'm not even telling you to stop eating. I apologize for like a candy everybody. No, no. I'm even saying. And I don't want it during the day. I wanted it one in the morning. I don't know if that's true. I think you. might be also eating nerd ropes in the middle of the day is sweet tart rope. That's a palate cleanser situation. That's if I have something bitter, some savory food. I'm like, well, I got to clean my mouth out. I throw a sweet tart rope in there. Yeah. Fix that. Uh,

here's a landlord that did some work that is going to blow your fucking mind. Uh, had a tenant move out recently. She took everything. Sure. One of those shit. Was she going to leave you stuff? I had a tenant move out recently. She left me her bed. Yeah, I mean, she took every, I wonder if that means, like, she took stuff that wasn't even hers. No, just her own stuff. Okay, that's normal. She took her stuff. Yeah. But left behind mold all over the bathroom ceiling in the living room and in a bedroom. Now, that is not her fault. Yeah, wait a second. How long did she live there?

How long did she live there for? I don't know. Any amount of time, it's still not her fault. I think, I don't know how mold, like, mold can be created through moisture or whatever. So I don't know, like, I don't know what actually, but you're right. It's, it's definitely the landlord's fault regardless of what causes it. Can I tell you something? Mm-hmm. In my elevator now. Yeah.

They have, they hung up all these flyers. I think, I think it is a maintenance guy gone rogue, obviously. But these flyers are hung up and they're like, do this, do this, do this. Don't turn your furnace down below 65 degrees And the pipes will blow up. It's like it's fucking nuts. You know what I mean? Pipe don't blow up at 65 degrees.

But one of the things it says is to keep moisture out of your home, Which you do want to do. Yeah. But they're like, don't use fish tanks, humidifiers, or get this, dry your clothes. Yeah, just leave them wet. Like don't air dry your clothes. You don't walk around wet clothes? I air dry all my stuff, Chris, because you know, some of my stuff costs a little bit of fucking money, you know?

So I air dry it. And they're saying, don't air dry your clothes. And I'm like, you're fucking, if this fucking building, the amount I'm paying for this building, if this thing falls down because I air dry to hoodie, that's their fault. That's not my fault. Brian's like everybody having to evacuate because Brian won't fucking tumble dry as $400. dollar hoody. Stop it. Stop, that makes me sound bad.

No, I'm not going to tumble dry. I air dry. And it shouldn't affect the house. No, I agree. I think that that is. That's a ridiculous ass. That's a ridiculous thing. I think maybe if every,

if ever, stop saying it's a luxury. Lugly apartment. $400. Oh, yeah. I know. I want to be clear as well, Kevin. He's not super rich. He's just very bad.

with money, just to be clear. Yeah. I mean, it has a gym and a pool. That's a luxury apartment. Yeah, and also luxury. Who knows? I'm not saying it's not super nice, but if it must not be. I can't dry my fucking clothes.

I can't add dry my clothes on this place. Of like what he's like what he's sort of, you know, his like childhood and things like that. I don't know that he would have like I don't know what your idea of luxury is. I'm not even saying that in a mean way. I don't, I don't really know what it is, you know. I don't know what mine is. I don't think I have a real. Yeah.

You know, we determine if it was a real luxury apartment. What's in the gym? It's two ellipticals. It's two ellipticals. Two treadmills, two bikes. And one of those big cord machines. I mean,

that's what mine has. And mine is not a luxury apartment. Mine has those. Yeah. I think. 17,000 square feet. Now Brian, now Brian's using the lie I used to tell about him to people.

And now he's. I'll just show people how luxury this place is. I told everyone he lived in a 17,000 square foot like palatial like huge penthouse apartment in the middle of the city. I'm on the top floor. It is 17. I think it's like 17. It is a big apartment.

It's nice. I got a big apartment. I got three bedrooms, three bath, bath. Okay. So anyway. Whoa.

So anyway, this guy's like down the hallway, the walls looked like someone had just showered with moisture streaks running top to bottom. Every window had mold just on the vinyl. parts. She told me she cleaned the place. It didn't look dirty, but when you walked in, it smelled awful, like bad hair or body odor, but really distinct and hard to describe. So I got on Amazon and found a gallon of 99% pure vinegar that was advertised to kill mold. I figured it had to be

the strong stuff because when it showed up, it had chemical warning labels all over the box and came sealed in a thick plastic bag. I wore a sweatshirt, pants, glass, and wore a sweatshirt, pants, glasses and an N95 math. I poured it straight into a pump spray bottle undiluted. Then I made the rookie mold remediation mistake of not opening a single window first. I started spraying the kitchen,

windows, and bathroom. In the bathroom, the vinegar mist came back down and hit my face. It burned like hell. Went straight through the N95, into my eyes, even with the glasses on. I dropped everything and ran to the kitchen sink. Of course the water was turned off to the

house. It was like a Tim Robinson sketch. I know that gets said a lot, but this really sounds like. He's a landlord too, so don't even, you know, you don't have to feel bad for him. He goes, luckily there was still some pressure in the lines and I was able to wash off the burning spots. I didn't end up with any burns, but it was close. I was too stubborn to stop.

So I turned the water to the house and diluted the vinegar before going back in. This time I open windows and pull my sweatshers up over my mouth to breath by the way rookie fucking pandemic era i did that once in that during the pandemic i forgot a mask and i really wanted a candy bar while i was out walking jeez man sorry well i'm telling a story no i get it it's just in you know the proximity of the other one it does sort of 2020 yeah it seems like it seems like this was caramel al era crazy for candy bars but yeah i am crazy for candy That's the truth. I love candy bars.

So anyway, I'm like, I need to get a candy bar. I go into the store and I don't have a mask. You were getting a caramelo at that point? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure. Yeah, oh, yeah. So I walk in there like this. Yeah, shirt over your nose. My shirt over my nose of my mouth.

And I spent the whole time in there like that. And I was just like, I just need this candy. Like, I need this candy bar real bad. You know, he goes, every insect in the house freaked out. They all rushed out of crack. and towards the windows, the screens kept them in, and they just dropped dead. It was like watching chemical warfare in real time. A few days later, the house didn't smell like anything.

All the moisture streaks wiped away. I sprayed it on weeds growing up through the cracks in the concrete driveway, and they were completely dead the next day. And a couple of spots, some paint peeled right off the walls. The mold stains didn't fully wipe away, but I'm hoping anything alive got nuked. Still can't believe this stuff is just sitting for sale on Amazon. So I didn't get rid of the mold. In the end, it didn't get rid of the mold. So it killed every single other thing in the home except the mold. Pealed the paint, but left the mold. I love a guy that burns himself with acid and blames it on Amazon for selling it. I can't believe they're even selling this.

Yeah, they understand the kind of morons who are on Amazon what could happen? First guy goes, so you're saying your rental has severe moisture issues? and you're blaming the tenant, maybe figure out how the, how the place molded. That's not normal. Yeah. Guy replies, it goes, that part,

the tenant could sue if the mold has a negative effect on their health. Now, that's a Reddit thing that I've been noticing lately. Maybe it's just the episodes we've been doing. But man, they're always talking about suing on there. Like, I've never seen people.

Like, the last time, I mean, growing up, me and my friends would always, you know, I'll sue you to like an adult. Yeah,

I don't know he would threaten them. Yeah, lawsuits were big when we were younger. They were, like, considered to be, you know what I mean? Like something people did. Like, oh, it's, you know, the McDonald's famous one or whatever that turned out to be complete. Like, people were like, oh, this is such bullshit that she sued, but then she was right to sue or whatever.

But yeah, though, I just remember. But we would be beating up a kid and a dad would come out and he'd hit one of us. And we're like, we're going to fucking sue you. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. But I think it came. It was like in the, it was in the, like, lexicon in a positive. Or in just like in a way like this, like this is something you can do it.

Like yeah, you can. There's money in it. There's money in it. You can sue people. Like if somebody fucking, you know, like knocks you over, like you're in a car accident, you can fucking sue them or they like, yeah, it was something I definitely felt like I might make some money from at some point when I was younger. God, we said it so much to any person. We would wrong somebody and be like, I'm going to sue you.

Because we would hear those stories about how like a burglar would break into a house and he would get hurt and then he would sue the home. owner. That must have been great for you guys because you're like, holy shit, so you're telling me even guys like us could get a hold of this stuff. Even people who are doing, you know, nefarious things like burglling can still get

a piece of this pie? Do you tell me I don't have to be a good guy? Yeah, that must have been a huge moment. It must be a huge moment. We loved it. We loved it. We were always in. Porto Sean and the Aaron and the boys. Me, Theo, Porto, Sean, Aaron, and Steve, Nate, running

around. Steve was the was Steve the guy who did karate? No, Steve, that was Mike and Mike. Oh, karate, Mike. He wasn't really around us very much. That was like, Mike was a more of, I know he's not one of your friends.

He's just one of my favorite characters from your job. He was going to be one of the Mighty Morphan Power Rangers. Yeah, just because he was into karate and he told you guys that he knew karate. You know what I'm saying? Like he just said that. It's such a classic movie. We believe it. I'll tell you he did because he would sneak up behind.

me and put me in a karate. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's, well, that's not karate. He wouldn't bring it. It's more like strikes, but yeah. No, that's true. Yeah, but, but he probably knew a lot of stuff. He probably knew BJJ as well.

He knew several martial arts is what you would say. Yeah, that's what I mean. There's a guy like, literally, he was dude. He was almost the green power ranger. Yeah, he's smart enough though to know like, if I can get this going, then no one's going to fuck with me. If I'm known as the guy who may possibly know like martial arts. Who may be a power ranger.

He successfully pulled it off, right? No one kicked his ass. No, people thought he would kill him. I remember talking to Mike and being like, so how'd you get the black belt? And he was like, oh, I meditated for 12 hours in front of my master. Yeah, that's badass. And now I'm thinking he probably didn't do that. That's probably not how he got a black belt.

I don't think he got a black belt. I hate to break it to, Brian. I don't know that he actually had a black belt. He was a tough man. He was a karate man. You should have seen all the times he'd sneak up on me when I was at Kroger. We'd be walking down a hall and be like, like whatever you know what I mean he'd be like I could choke you right now

yeah totally to like come up from behind it to just be like I could kill you that is old school bully shit right there he wasn't a bully though nobody bullied me um I decided to go to the HGTV the IMDB what reads some reviews of some HG TV shows right uh I I think you guys are from Canada so I think you guys know the property brothers Yeah, we know. I mean, we have, we have HD TV or whatever. We have all the American shows. And you're like, you're the property brothers.

We are the property brothers. You too are. You guys would be great. Kevin and I are the property brothers. Yeah, no, I was never, this is, I have zero interest in this kind of thing. So I, I'm aware of these guys, but I, I don't, I never watched it. My wife watches the fuck out of this stuff. And then I would like make little games with her.

You know what I mean? No. And be like, we're watching Love It or List It. And I'm like, list it. You know what I mean? Just to be involved with her. Well, that's a fun game. Thank you.

The brothers are great. You would just say it when, like, when would you say it? During the show, they'd be like, love it or list it. And I always said listed. I never said Love it, not once. Because, you know, with me, it's like, I want to buy a new thing. I'm not trying to like fix an old thing. I like having a new thing.

Of course. Yeah. The brothers are great. Those homeowners, though. The enjoyment of the show relies much on the natural charm and charisma of the Scott brothers. If you like them, you'll probably like the show. The identical twins are good-looking, energetic, humorous, and good with often difficult homeowners. I love them. Those homeowners, though, I don't know where they find some of these people or why they select them for the show. the property brothers have been on TV for a while so it should be obvious to everyone what they do and how they do it however just about every episode includes homeowners too now this is a person who has identified something and has no idea that they have they're just so they go one they want to buy a move in ready house with no renovations needed rendering jonathan useless i guess they want a house way out of their price range a quick look at the real estate listings could have told them that are super picky and controlling about every little detail. Then why call a TV show that involves someone designing and renovating your home? Now, this is the line. This is a lot I cut this for.

It gets to the point where I think the show's producers just want to generate drama for the show by selecting homeowners that will butt heads with the brothers. No. No way. They're mostly in it for doing the renovations. These are DIY renovation. fans who are, you know, in it for the love of the game.

Last time I checked, yeah, I think they're just looking to break even. I love it when somebody identifies a thing and they don't know. It's starting to look like they're trying to make drama on this TV show. I'm starting to notice the most obvious thing that everyone's already noticed.

This guy goes 10 out of 10, my favorite house renovation show. I spent about five years of my life rehabbing all kinds of homes i love guys to do you know we always love the guys that do it uh homes businesses isn't anything that has a roof on it i like this show because it's classy come on man it's such a cool thing to say about anything that you like something because it's classy that's why the that's exactly why the tom and bunny sex club tours are so funny that's the whenever we read sex club like reviews and

stuff like it. The reason they're funny is because they all say it's classy and they go in there and they're like, here's the dress code. You can't, you know, you got to wear this. You got to wear that. And that's funny. It's not some sleazy place. Mind you, if you see the club tours, it's the sleazyest, nastiest, dirtiest place you've ever seen. But then they're just like, yeah, but you, you have to wear like a certain attire. I mean, Kevin, some of the nastiest rooms you've ever seen in your life. and they're being framed as like nice. So I've seen some Tom and Bunny. Oh, yeah.

See, they're great. Yeah. No, yeah. These they're there. We don't have that. We don't have that lifestyle around like in,

in around here. We don't need clubs. Yeah, you do. No, we don't have a full-time clubs. There's a Vancouver one. No,

it isn't. It's a part-time club. I've talked about. What do you mean a part-time? Like, I mean, it's only on a weekend. Were they at preschool?

Yeah, the other days? No, it's an interesting question. I think it's just a nightclub or something. or like something else of bars. I don't know. It's a space maybe or maybe it's like an event group or something that puts on these

parties. I don't know. It's a sex club at night and a preschool during the day. That's not. I've spent about, it's very grounded with lots of humor when a situation gets into crisis. Every new homeowner is treated with respect and their feelings and thoughts are highly valued and incorporated into their new home.

I'm always learning something. That's what I found with, I used to watch Pimp My Rye. and I found that. Have you seen those videos on YouTube that are like, we found one of the Pimp My Ride cars? Oh, yeah, but I would love. That's the type of thing I like.

That is the type of thing I like. They're good. Send one to me, right. After we're done recording, send one to me. Because I've never seen an unhappy customer with the property brothers. They always seem to come out over the top, making the new homeowners who are usually in so much fear

from problems of financial investments, to utter ecstasy upon review. of their homes. I'm amazed that not only do they transform an ugly, dysfunctional beat-up home to a beautiful palace where one would think royalty would live. Come on, man. Wow. We want to think a royalty would live and or a billionaire.

If every couple could have a property brothers experience, the world would be a much happier place to live in. Maybe one day there will be a property brothers university to train people to team up and do this all over the world. If it existed, I'd be there right now. maybe Mr. Bees can do it. Maybe Mr. Bees can get into a home renovation TV. Maybe Mr. Bees can do it, but it's in Saudi Arabia for some reason.

This guy gave it. Do you know that? Mr. Bees did like open like Mr. Bees. Park or something is like big thing. He was putting it up online. It's like, hey, it's this big crazy theme park. And it's in Saudi Arabia. Mr. Beast theme park in Saudi Arabia. Yeah.

Let's go to that. Beast, Beast land or something it's called. I'm not really sure. that you want to go to saudi arabia listen man i am already going there like for a festival next year but i could maybe make a second trip yeah guys podcast saudi arabia it's kind of yeah i didn't we didn't want to say it but yeah we're following in the footsteps of bad friends and we will be doing the podcast live at rea and it's we're doing it for the people you know what i mean i'm not doing it for the fucking no no no no no no we're

doing it in an ironic way where we're like making fun of it. It's like, can you imagine this is so ridiculous. And it's like we are, yeah, we're getting paid for it and stuff, but it's a goof. This guy gives it one out of ten stars. It goes, so cringe. Twins always trying to joke. Not funny. Just cringy. Everything is so overpriced and ridiculous. Now, the show's called Fixer Upper that we're looking at. And they fix things up. You know what I mean? Yeah. One out of star. One out of ten. One out of star.

One out of star. One out of star. One out of star is a really good fluff. One out of star. That's almost penis or pussy and vagina. One out of star. Yeah, one out of star is a good one because it's good because it can be used quite a few times where it's just like, you know, this one was really good.

Actually, it wasn't so good. I'm giving it one out of star, you know? it's one of the points on the star each star is worth five points yeah and it's one out of star like many others i was a huge fan of the show i was so looking forward to the new season to begin i love their family the work they did on the homes etc i was somewhat annoyed that on every show they would call the client with an unforeseen problem that would cost the poor people more i was becoming increasingly annoyed by some of chips sometimes strange antics he seems to truly believe he's really funny.

He gets worse as time passes. Chip is this person does not like Chip very much. I'll say this. He gets worse as time passes. This thing is long and it's all about Chip. Chip seems like a real son of a bitch to be. I'll say,

I'm increasingly annoyed by some of, oh yeah, when he squirted water from a bidet on one show, which went into the client's mouth, I was horrified. that's a show I'll watch that makes me want to watch I was about to just be like oh who cares

but if it went into their mouth that's a little bit too much chip come on chip get it together Chip he goes I was horrified why the client didn't fire them or decim is beyond me even after that I was a TV it's a TV

show. You're being filmed. You're not going to slug the host. Yeah. He goes, even after that, I wasn't giving up on the show. I love Joanna and the kids. So why finally the first show, the second season started? I was so happy.

Then while showing a house to the clients, Chip disappears into a room and reappears with his pants down. Jeff. Jeff might be going crazy I was like well what could Chip really be doing on this show you know he's actually

really he's like going full Louis C.K. Oh no. I'm out of control. Chip. Chip, man. You can't pull your pants down. Do you know what's so good too though? I'm picturing this person watching

being like where Chip go? Where did Chip go? Like you know. just waiting for fucking chip you're now you're joking around again he goes uh some may feel i'm overreacting uh but i wasn't watching the show to see someone's ridiculous idea of what i consider inappropriate humor i thought this was supposed to be a family show but i wonder how far the neck will network i don't know that it's a i don't know that a lot of kids are interested in the DIY stuff you don't think it's like fixer-upper yeah i don't think that's it's really a show for the family so much it is

it's a family show. Whatever. Chip is funny though. He runs around with his pants down. He has the guest, he has the homeowners drink out of a bidet. I mean, it sounds like it's maybe they meant,

I mean it should have like family values. It shouldn't have like, you know, crude. But I would say that, listen, Chip obviously, I'm joking right.

He didn't have it. He's not hanging hog. He's not, he's not coming up with his fucking dick and balls. Oh, they're blurring it out. Jerking his dick. He's obviously going to. He's coming up.

He's coming up. coming out with like full boxers probably right he's coming out with like big long boxer shorts on or something and it's just and i think it's probably and then the bidet thing probably was agreed upon or what like i'm thinking it's it's clean water it's pretty tame i'm guessing and it's not a fam i don't think it's meant for you can drink out of the toilet if you wanted to i prefer not to though but that water's far i would like it if i did i would like it to be my own choice i would not like chip to spray it in my mouth you know no you're right you're right i would feel like if chip sprayed the water in my mouth from the toilet it would feel like i was being disrespected or something and like like you know like he would be he was

dominating me or something i'd suck him off i'd suck him off i'd be like hey chip what you do in there i don't suck him off wow why why would you do that friends see and chip or we're comedy friends I see so it would be for caught you'd be like you'd be like you think it would be funny it would be funny this guy drank out of a bidet now he's sucking it off chip he's probably

this is the best fixer up where I've ever seen the homeowner's sucking off chip they're not even fucking blurring it they're showing his hard dick he must love this renovation I feel he's dragging in the show down. I'm poor Joanna with it. Needless to say, I stopped my record series option on the DVR.

When was this recorded? When was this? I don't know. I haven't heard about the, I haven't heard DVRs. Well, this guy goes, I love that series too, by the way, with Chip. What's the name of the fixer upper? Oh yeah, fixer upper. Yeah, that's a good idea. It's good. Listen to this one. It's good. Listen to this one. Seven out of ten. I love this show, but Chip now seems to play for the camera instead of his old style being natural his look is very scummy now too i am very disappointed so chip is sounds like it's gone through some sort of character change where it's like become this devilish uh kind of character now where they've kind of said like what if we instead of chip just being like the husband or whatever he is i don't know are you oh there's chip can he doesn't look like a guy who gets sucked off what a sleaze

can you Brian can you pull him up on so i can see him like clearly on there i would love to see this guy chip from fixer-upper i i will bring up his google image oh he does look slummy they have some chip looks gummy everybody they have had some sort of meeting with like the executives or they're just like things aren't working with the wholesome chip angle like what if we have we turn chip into this like we turn chip into this like um like and then he's like is anyone here taking dm t um uh do you know the jester the jester what if we do we do we do we do we do we do we do we do we turned him into a jester like character okay so is that before after i think this is a before and after so he cut off all his hair and bleached it blonde there he is right there that's scummy after having

after having long hair though i think he's yeah he's he might have become sort of uh he's going scummy mode he's like grown his hair long but you know these people are concerned no i think he's taking his hair off i think he's gone the other way this look right here but i think this is the scummy chip hmm so anyway this next review. This next review goes, I used to watch Fixer Upper all the time, but I got tired of Chip with his jokes.

Fuck, man. Chip is not hitting with a lot of people. He got tired of Chip with his jokes and acting stupid, trying to be funny and make people laugh. I really think the show would be better off if it was just Joanna. She's very creative and I enjoy watching her create masterpieces. However, as long as Chip's on the show,

I will not watch it. just checking in and then everyone out and then see if he's gone. Chip shows up. Fuck. God damn it. Chip shows up. He's got like the fucking silly glasses and nose on and you're just like, God damn it.

He hasn't changed. Final thing we're going to do here is a Quora question. What can I use instead of a nail gun? What's that? The guy goes, here's the answer. A fucking hammer for any use you have. But if you can't do it with a hammer, stay away from a nail gun.

Nail guns are not some kind of deadly device. You might have got that idea from Hollywood. Chris loves movie guys. I love guys who they're like idea of reality is all formed from movies. So like every situation they talk about is like, you're like, where have I heard this? And it's like it's a movie they saw, you know? If somebody breaks into this house, I'll grab my nail gun and shoot them with nails. Yeah. Yeah, I mean, listen, I think they're thinking the nail guns were happy Gilmore, right?

Well, that's one, but I've seen like many movies where they kill people with a nail gun. One of the lethal weapon movies has a really good nail gun scene. There's actually a movie called the nail gun massacre. I don't know that. It's a swear on my life. Really? Okay. So this is a, this is like a huge thing. I guess now who is the guy that fucking knows movies. It's you. Okay. 1985 film nail gun massacre okay Brian you got the you got the movie I'm a movie guy you're the movie guy of the pod now I'm a moot and and the tagline for it is it's cheaper than a chainsaw so finally here's one last one it seems like whenever I watch a home renovation show they always find at least one wall they can knock down to open up the space and improve the value why olders homes have so many superfluous walls Guys, this answer is crazy. I promise you. This is the perfect thing to end the show on.

I don't think this guy's... Okay, so anyway, he goes, older homes were smaller. Oddly, smaller homes function better when sectioned off as it reduces noise pollution. You can live in peace in one room while people converse or play or watch TV or whatever. Just feed away if there's a wall in between you.

Also, kitchens were messier. My mother-in-law would be de-feathering... are messy or? Messier. Well, they're going to say my mother-in-law would be de-feathering a chicken. She just killed in the backyard. And no, this wasn't in a farm. This was in a big city.

While that might be extreme, such messiness did prevail in countless smaller ways. Vegetables laden with dirt. Fish needing to be skinned and gutted, for example. And there were no dishwasher. So dirty dishes piled up on the counter until after dinner. People generally don't want to eat in the midst of all that. Brother, don't I know it? I do all my dishes.

as I go. That's the thing I do. Okay. I do my dishes as I go. Yeah, that does make sense. Now that they say it, I was kind of like dishes, but they probably were. You're right, because food preparation, there's less like food that's just, you know, easy to prepare. Fucking idiots. They should just wash them as they go. Hey, I'm done with this dish.

I wash it. Put it away. Yeah. And you know what I'll do when I do that when I'm done? Little reward candy. A little candy bar. Yeah. I'll have a little candy.

This guy gets it and take a job. Yeah. He goes, Recognize the TV home shows are about TV first and foremost. What looks good on TV is long shots, uninterrupted open views. A tremendous home lacking this won't make the cut. It's the same reason there is paint out wood finishes,

wood often photographs poorly, looking dark and muddy. But painted out that trim looks so fresh trim. That's the best part about working on anything is trim. You know what I mean? I think I do Look at that trim That's that's Chip Gaines is doing that all the time

Like chip shows up That on Chip Gaines That was That was funny Chip shows up He's like damn I can do the trim Yeah and he's just like hey nice trim Like imagine it's like doing shit like that

Like he's a nice fucking A nice trim you know what I'm saying And Joanna's like sitting there just putting up with it it's like we're a packaged deal. Yeah, I feel like, I feel like the producers have told,

there's no way that Chip just decided one day, like, I'm going to start acting foolish on you, you know? I think probably somebody was like, all right, we need to put this character dynamic in and change something or whatever.

Every example of shit makes them funnier to me. For some reason. I shot a bidet at the homeowner. I fucking ran in with my pants down. I mean, I mean, scummy. Putting,

putting the, putting, putting, Yeah, I'd suck them off. Making a, putting the bidet water into the client's mouth is, I'd really like to see that clip. I'm going to see if I can find it. I'll post, I'll send it to you. Maybe we could try to, right.

Maybe we could try to watch it sometime, you know. Hold on chip gains bidet. Okay. All right. Okay. You can see if it's like a viral quote. What's a bidet? Oh, there's no chip gains bidet part.

Oh, AI really helps. Like, all right. Well, I don't know. Hey, you heard it here, folks from Brian. AI really helped. We love it. Hey, listen. We love, yeah, they don't have it.

They don't have it. We'll find it. One of the listeners will send it to us in January. Yeah, please. If you can find Chip Gaines on a fixer up or spraying bidet water into a client's mouth, I would love to see that. It's all right. It's on Instagram.

Kevin, do you have anything you'd like to plug? Yeah, I've got a two-year-old comedy special that I'd like it if people watch. that'd be neat. It's called Heavy Favorites on YouTube. And you should watch it. It's stand-up comedy and we're fans of stand-up comedy around here. I talk about it every now that I don't like to mention it very often. Yeah, that's all you talk about.

But I've done it before myself. Me, I'm over here talking. Me, I'm over here like Chip Gaines is my guy. I mean, I do feel, I would say I feel like you are kind of the chip gains of the podcast, you know. I think I am a little bit because sometimes I'll say something just out of hand. Like I'm sucking off Chip Gaines. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. Exactly.

Chip Gaines would be the guy on the podcast who says that he's sucked off Chip Gaines. And sometimes, sometimes during the podcast, I'll stand up and I won't be wearing any pants and my penis will just be flopping around. Yeah, he does that sometimes. See you all next week. Goodbye. Bye.