Guys: With Bryan Quinby - Guys: Episode 158 - Bewbie Guys with Mike Hale

Episode Date: February 10, 2026

We shad our buddy Mike Hale from Your Kickstarter Sucks on the show to talk about Boobs Guys. So of course we looked at the chive, some reddit posts from some guys that are very horny. We talked about Hooters, a family restaurant, and some cool books about boobs from Goodreads. We also talk a bit about former and current neighbors because I have a new enemy There is more Chris at https://www.patreon.com/notevenashow And for more Guys content, streams and SHOCKTOBER: a deep dive into shock jocks you can click patreon.com/guyspodcast, Join us on the Sunday Night Stream every Sunday night at 8:00 EST at twitch.tv/notevenashowand I am on https://bsky.app/profile/murderxbryan.bsky.social  Guys is on Instagram! https://www.instagram.com/guys.pod Guys has a Post Office Box now! PO Box 10769 Columbus Ohio 43201  

Welcome to guys, a podcast about guys. Happy 2026. Well, yeah. This is the first episode we recorded in 2026 just a peek behind the curtain. Hopefully we get a couple of peaks behind the curtain today. No, you're not. I have the titties in my notes, but you're not going to get to see them. Oh, a little bit disappointing.

But yeah, we, I'm very excited to be back recording main episodes. This is also the first main episode that I have recorded. since becoming straight edge. So I'm pretty excited about that as well. Well, Chris didn't let me introduce them. So Chris is here. Hi, Chris. How are you doing?

Hey, yeah, I forgot the format of the show. It's been so long. I, you know, a lot of times they'll be like, oh, Brian turns into the guy when he researches the episode. This episode, not so much. He was already a guy. Okay. So just, just to be clear, though, Brian, you are, you are trying to say that you are not

a big boob guy because it's kind of well-known about you. I was sort of thinking about how you're going to be catching an insane amount of strays on this one because There's nothing really in here that has any bearing on me. Let's bring the guest in. Of course, we're the first episode back in 2026 for me and Chris. We had to bring Mike on and talk about big boobs guys. Oh, yeah, and I'm ready to talk.

Hong Kong. I've been up all night researching this one, gang. And we didn't ask you to do any research, actually. We made it pretty clear that we didn't need you to do. any of that research but you were insistent on that. Guess what? Didn't get a lick done. Well, that's the opposite of Brian. He was more of a suck. Yeah, you would never lick. You'd never, you would, I mean, that's actually more alarming that you would never even pull the mouth back and just use the tongue. You would stay like, like sucking on it like a baby would for

three hours. That's the truth. I'm going to tell you the truth. I don't, I'm not going to say I fully remember what went on. Yeah. But I have to think because I was like, I would go tell my friends I sucked on her titties that I did mostly sucking. And you would, you must have had good, like you would must have been on to breathe very well through your nose if you're sitting there attached for that type of duration. But we're not going to talk all about Brian sucking titties.

I promise. I'm not even, I won't bring it up one. I will never bring it up again in this episode. So anyway, I was into Florida Keys. two weeks ago and I hated it there by the way it's a shitty place it's one of the worst place you could ever go to and people know that and it's very well known but you did decide to go there anyway it was a topless resort you went to right for the purposes of researching the show there were no topless people there at all except for men like 65 year old men who were drunk

as fuck walking around without a shirt on yes there was that when you go to a place let me say When you go to vacation, you go to a place and all of the t-shirts at the t-shirt store about being drunk all day. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Not a good place to be. But it was like, yeah. So when I got there, I was walking around going to all the t-shirt stores. I remember in like 2008 or 2009 or something whenever I was in Charleston, I going to like Myrtle Beach or something and seeing like all the, all the t-shirts with the lettering on. I was like, I don't give it up.

or whatever the fuck like all those shitty like uh you know like back in the day when they had like huge lettering on t-shirts was like the thing or whatever it's so cheap and so nasty the one they the one i saw at every store was i'm not gay but twenty dollars is twenty dollars that's thing's still funny to something yeah a guy sees that he's like i have to have that the idea of him wearing it is so funny i know i couldn't imagine because the reason we're doing a episodes because there were a lot of boobs shirts and I was like who's wearing these and then I remember that my my sister-in-law who is the one that gave her dad an AI book about himself for his birthday.

Okay. So she gave him one year she went on a vacation to one of those beach towns, probably Myrtle Beach. I would guess Murtile Beach. And she brought him back a shirt with the different kinds of tities on it. And it was just lines and rows of, I think I've seen this shirt. Like all the names of them? Yeah, like the fried egg. Different kinds.

Yeah. Yeah. And I remember looking at it, even at that age in my 20s and being like, where is he going to wear? Where are you going to wear? Yeah. It's crazy to have that kind of confidence. It is a type of confidence to be walking around in a shirt.

Yeah. That embarrassing. Like, like, I mean, even you're talking about people walking with their shirts off. That's a crazy. amount of confidence to be so drunk that you're walking around with no shirt on or like a shirt that has something wildly inappropriate. Like I always think about going to the aquarium and seeing like a guy with that wrestling shirt on, Brian.

Oh, the one that says, Scissor me, daddy ass. It was like, this is like a family aquarium. You have your six-year-old child there and it's like you have a shirt that says, Cizor me, daddy or something. That's crazy. Yeah. I never, I guess I never really do.

about it. I see the shirts. I don't see them that often on people, but I remember in Seattle, there was a store that was just that. It was just like all shirts like that were like, you know, like suck me sideways. I'm a, you know, like, and it's just, yeah, the idea, you immediately tell everyone that you're kind of like a fucking shitty guy or whatever. It's like the only place you wear it is Ripley's believe it or not. It's the only place you go wear those types of shirts is Well, the one that got this episode going actually was there was a row of shirts that were I love, like I love New York. But it would say like I love black women. I love, uh, like all this.

And one of them just said, I love big boobs. And I was like, can you imagine like a 40 year old man putting on an I love big boobs shirt, like going out with his family to fucking enjoy the day on a boat? Yeah. What's he hoping for that like some lady with big boobs is going to be like, oh, you're a Yeah, that's me. Here he are and just like pull him out to show you. Like with his wife, he's with his wife on like the ferry to go to some island. That's all.

That's another thing. Thinking about this guy's wife or like all these guys' wives who have to like put up with their shit. Like with their funny shirts. Oh, the jokes too. The funny shirts. It's funny that you bring up because I know a guy that did funny shirts for a while. And like I did him for a while too. If you guys don't remember, there was an early.

early internet, maybe not early internet, but like 2000, 2002 internet website called T-shirt. Dude, guess what? I submitted one when I was like, I think when I was like 16, I submitted a shirt to that. And I won and I never emailed the guy back or whatever because it was like a dumb fucking dead baby joke idea or whatever. And I was like, I was like, well, I'm obviously not emailing this guy back.

Yeah. Yeah. I don't know this. I don't remember this website. Yeah, it was like, it was like really offensive, like, you know, quote unquote shirts or whatever, like, you know, dead babies can't say no. That wasn't mine. Okay. In 2003, I remember the one that was in 2003 and it was an I heart New York shirt, but it was an airplane instead of a heart.

That's too far. That's too far. 2003. Listen, 9-11 is not funny and not something to laugh about. Despite, obviously, I took a little heat a while back for laughing pretty hard about 9-11, and so I want to get out here and say that that's not a funny shirt. But yeah, you can't spell manslaughter without laughter. Yeah, yeah.

And a friend might have a bunch of their shirt. That's a psychotic shirt, by the way. So that's like a whole different level. That's like, hey, I'm not a freaky pervert guy. It's like, hey, man, you might not be safe around me at all. I might kill you. Like the idea I find killing really funny. It's a crazy.

That guy had to have made so much money because no concern for like a quality of t-shirt because nobody buying it gives a fuck about that. So it's all like get the cheapest blank you can and then like throw a phrase on or whatever. And other guys are submitting the phrases. So you're not even coming up with it. So what is actually the business model that you have? This is their famous one. I just saw one of their most famous one. I support single moms and it's an exotic dancer on a pole.

Yeah. That was funny. Because I'm on there and most of them are like, I'm not gay by my asshole is. I mean, that's a pretty funny. So a lot of them center around guys who are. I think that was mine.

Oh, this is the one my friend had. Oh my God. This is the one my friend had. I'll show you. Because he would wear it everywhere. And like at the time I thought it was like the coolest fucking thing in the world. Okay.

says there are two people fucking on the back of this shirt and on the back of it and he'll listen to this just kidding believe in jesus that's yes i remember this shirt oh that's an that's a super annoying shirt but i like the gay i like the ones that are gay shirts where they're like it's seemingly like older guys who are potentially bi-curious or bisexual or whatever but like this is kind of their way it's like hey i'm not gay but 20 dollars is 20 dollars so sort of saying like, hey, I'm not comfortable saying I'm gay, but I would actually do gay stuff. Let me give you one more. There's one that says it's customizable and it says Epstein files. And you're supposed to put like your mom's in the Epstein files, your brother's in the Epstein files, your girlfriend, your kid, like that you can customize it to whichever person.

Like I could send one that says Chris is in the Epstein files. Yeah. I'm going to search your name because there's probably guys getting mad at you. like what if Sebastian Gorka texted? Jeffrey Epstein was like this fucking Christian. Oh, like you're saying that I could have found myself. No, I don't even think. I don't even really think that that's like a funny thing to even goof about the idea that I could be in the Epstein files.

I think that's very funny. I went to big boobs gone wild, R slash big boobs gone wild. And fine. So anyway, this woman is sitting in front of a computer playing World of Warcraft and she just has titty's out. You can't see her face or anything like that. And she says, Gamer Girl titties. Yay. So here's some of the comments on that. 10 out of 10. These are beautiful. Great size and shape. Nipples look amazing and they will make a great pillow. Ariolas are so suckable too. You'd look stunning in a long red dress showing off your cleavage.

They're so plump and juicy. I want to be between them. So wait, Ariel, sucking the aerial. They're suckable. They're quite suckable. But they mean the nipples are, right? The aerial is like, the whole thing. I'm talking the whole thing. So he's getting his mouth wide on that. I got to get the whole ditty in. I'm getting my whole ditty in there.

I was worried that this episode would be too disgusting and too nasty. And I, then I was like, oh, let me just kind of check. And Brian's been sending me posts this week about it because he's so excited about the episode. And I shared one with Ariel, Ariel. Ariel. And I shared one with her and she didn't laugh. And she got kind of upset with me and was like, that's legitimately so fucking gross. I know.

That's not in the episode. I'll tell everybody that's not in the episode. I don't think I kept any of the Grass City forums post. I went to Grass City forums and searched Bress. And it's that first time you saw Bress. It was just a bunch of stoner's saying like, yeah, I was watching my mom through the slats in the wall. Yeah, it's really, really uncomfortable. That's great.

Babysitter show beer titties when I was 13. This guy goes, those are honestly a really nice size. Like, if we can get serious for a second. Hold up, y'all. And then the O.P, the woman goes 600cc. So they're, you know, breast implants. And he replies, he replies, he replies, wait, they're not natural. Because in that case.

You had a great surgeon. Can we see them? I'm not saying that because I'm getting horny. I will say this. Not all of them are in the file. It's only a few. Does she show her wow character? Okay.

See, to me, those are very obviously fake press. And that's why I wanted to see the image. Excuse me. What a surgeon. You know, that's what I said when I saw him. Hey, yeah, could I have the actually the mailing address of your surgeon? I would like to set him a thank you. I would like him to send me two implants to suck on

They should do that This guy goes Girls who play wow with great titties are the best And then the guy replies it goes Retail or Classic is the biggest question I am So is it retail World Warcraft or classic And that guy's kind of being funny right He's like I love those guys who come in

And they're just like they notice something else in the image What are the specs? What are the specs for the laptop? Yeah Kind of a funny guy. Yeah, I kind of didn't even notice the breast prominent in the photo. I'm actually taking a different angle. They're like the guys at the concert who are standing in line to get the autograph of the band. And then when they get to them, they're like, these guys, they just don't know anything.

These fans, they're crazy. I love that. That's one of my favorite stories was in an episode where this guy was like, I was buying a t-shirt from the opening act that I was talking to her singer about the absurdities of fame. Wow. Trying to relate to the artist. Jeez, man. This crazy life.

Oh, shit. These fan boys are going crazy, honestly. How do you deal with this? How do you use this stuff? Anyways, would you be able to sign my left butt cheek, please? This guy goes, this guy just has beautiful boobs. Damn. And then the next guy goes.

The masculine urge to suck a gamer girl's tits while she plays her favorite game. The masculine urge. The masculine urge to act like a little baby. Doing the 2013 Twitter jokes. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, it makes sense that these guys have kind of outdated. Like I feel we're going to maybe, I don't know if you're going to cover the chive or whatever.

Oh, my God, are we going to go to the chival? So I do feel like, yeah, boobs guys. chive guys to me are like yeah there's a lot of cross over this lady here says I gotta be someone's type well yeah she's a beautiful woman with big boobs

a lot of guys type this first reply now I don't I don't know if this is a guy or a woman it doesn't matter but they go my son's exactly I should I should hook you up with my son he's great

that's the nuttyest thing I He plays games all day long, 24 hours a day. My son would love your big ditties. He doesn't leave his room. I'm actually trying to get him out of here. So if you had an apartment or a house or something, that would be great that he could live and move into. My son, he loves, because the funny thing of saying my sons exactly is that like, this woman

didn't say anything about her personality at all. She just has like blue hair Blue hair and tits And tits So that's what that's what this person Knows about their son is like Yeah my teenage son is actually Really big into huge tits right now

Sitting at the Country Club At the table with all the other parents And they're like my son's in college You're like my son's into big titty My son wax off to Smurfs And that lady from Halo The hologram lady from Halo

basically all day long. This guy goes this. And remember, she said, I have to be somebody's type. This guy goes, if there is a god, hear me for what I'm about to say. Yes, yes and yes. Lord Jesus. Lord Jesus. Not to use another old term, but these feel like a lot of down bad kind of guys.

A lot of desperation in these replies. And I think. it comes down to the fact that when you're dealing with something like this, a lot of these people are replying at full horny level. I know, because they're like,

the horniest place on the internet. And they're, and they're possibly even, you know, masturbating while they're actually doing a reply or whatever. So they're getting just the most, like you're getting the most desperate sounding replies. So you could ever imagine.

Well, this guy's not desperate at all. He goes, you look great and fun, but we'd have to hang out a bit to see what your personality is like. I love that guy. Thanks for picking up on the vibes here, buddy. Could you write me a little bit of a bio for you so I can see if we're into kind of some of the same things?

I mean, that guy is just as horny by the way. He's just like, hey, I'm going to like, hey, all these other guys are kind of coming at it in this way. In this way, I'm going to kind of. That's smart. You're seeing all these. It's like you're in the jungle, you know. You're seeing all these, like, guys go after the big, the carcass of meat, you know, and you're sitting, you're back in the cut being like, yeah, I'm going to find my own way into this.

Yeah, I'm going to figure out. My own angle on this. I'm going to do things a little bit differently. She hears this all day. When she posts these pictures of her naked breasts on the internet, all she's hearing all day is guys commenting about her naked breasts. Yeah. She never hears. I want to suck your kids.

It's probably a test that she's actually doing. see if you're like a cool down-to-earth kind of guy who can handle this kind of thing. He's down to earth, man. This guy, he doesn't go crazy. He doesn't say awuga when he sees big titty. This guy is way down-ear-er-ear-huh. Yeah, filtering through the awuga, hubba-hubba comments to a guy that says, yeah, I would actually like to take you out and discuss your favorite literature for a while.

And then we could possibly talk about me sucking on your tits for three hours. We're going to talk about this hooters later. on in the show. Obviously, we're going to read some Hooters reviews. You guys ever been to Hooters? Yes. I think I had before in college. Yeah. Very quick yes from Brian. I've been to a Hooters one time. I think it was in Calgary when I was there doing comedy and the comedy condo or like the place that you stay in there when you're doing the show was like across the street from a Hooters. Yeah. And I went in there and had some of their famous Hooters wings. And yeah, I mean, I don't remember.

I'm not, just to be clear, I don't know, we joked a lot in the beginning. I'm not like a big boobs guy. I'm not small boobs. No, not small boobs. Like normal boobs. I do like boobs and I'm like I think I'm turned on by boobs in a normal kind of way that a lot of guys are. But when they get too big, yeah, that's not appealing to me, really. And Hooters, Hooters isn't, Hooters isn't a strip club and it's not porno.

It's like a whole other fucking thing that is the, that like, you're trying to figure out, okay, so some people like the wings. Maybe they're just going there for the wings. But when they elbow each other's ribs before they go to Hooters and they're like, we're going to go to Hooters, like, what are they thinking? Yeah, I mean, I guess it's like, if you do like the wings, and I don't remember. them being that good. Listen. Yeah, that's, I don't remember it. I think when I went to Hooters in college or something, we were, we were big into like

wing night. So we'd go like the places that had like 25 cent wing night or something. I think we tried Hooters and we were just like, yeah, this sucks. Yeah, I think that, I think that the wings are just mid-range wings. Maybe people could correct as it who are big wing guys or whatever because they are, no, they are really good. But I don't remember them being that great. I think that it's just guys, guys who want to be around big breast

women and like I don't know want to talk to them I guess right that's like a thing you can yeah because that's what I was saying that's why I brought that up there was on Twitter a lot of years ago a guy sort of wrote like a blog post about like how they could save hooters because it was having trouble like in the economy and he was like maybe if they like came and talked to you about their favorite book and you guys can have an intellectual conversation with each other about like books or art or something like that. That might be an interesting thing to do it. Give the customer like a false sense of relationship.

Like they're in a relationship with these gals who were mostly in college just trying to. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And also like like it's a salon. Like you're going to sit down and be like, oh, have you read Oliver Twist? What's your favorite book? Oh, Catcher in the Rye.

Catcher in the Rye. Here's my favorite book. Gigantic boobs. Ghost protocol. Tom Clancy. Have you ever read it? Have you ever read it? Young lady.

it'll change your life. Rich dad, poor dad is my favorite book. You read that book? It's about a rich dad and a poor dad. I went to knowfap.com. I don't know if you guys know what that website is. It's where people get together and they try not to masturbate. And this guy goes, has anyone been able to remove this boobs fetish?

Hmm. I'm around 50. I'm around 50 days. off a masturbation, Mark, and now have a bit more deep thoughts about what harm porn might have caused in my life. And listen, this might have happened. Since my sexuality awakened, I've always been fond of bigger breasts. And of course, when I discovered porn, my preference for fetish awakened, but that is the thing. I don't know if I have a preference or a fetish. I would have hoped by this point of not watching porn that the fetish would be fading more and it's still there.

I don't authorize myself to fantasize in any shape or form, but I can, my mind, I can, I can feel my mind trying to pull me back to the big boobs. I find that preference shallow as men are more than, as women are more than just breasts, just as men are more than just penises. I never heard somebody say men are just penises, but have you, have any of you been able to remove these kinds? So this guy wants to stop thinking about 10. He's in hell.

He's in hell. Yeah. This guy goes, hmm, just get it through your head that size don't matter. I'm into personality more than anything else. sizes are bonuses. No offense to women, in my opinion. So that's why I'm always able to focus. But I do get attracted to their body parts, example, boobs and such.

So this guy loves boobs. This guy goes, I think we're naturally wired to think bigger equals better, which we know isn't true. But it's kind of intrinsic to our nature. What your problem seems to be is that you're objectifying women. Yes. He goes, don't be ashamed. We've all done it. You'll find that once you see a woman is just people, you're going to be.

appreciate breasts for what they are, pleasant fun bags and baby feeders. And they're all great, no matter the size. But it's best not to sexualize them so much unless you find yourself in a sexual setting with a partner. Then it's different. So. That guy's very wise. Yeah, that's the wise professor. The wise suckler.

He's like the forum's elder who steps into the thread and just got to stop thinking about boobs. Yeah, brother, man. And it doesn't, you're going to convince yourself that. there for feeding babies. I mean, I mean, I will say that that does help to, right? If you're in a like obviously Ariel is still breastfeeding some and has been for the past few years. It's going to be hell for you.

Do you get a drink? Because you're like, I want some of that. Yeah. Do I get a drink? A little drink. Do you get milky? No, I've not drank. Oh, come on.

What the fuck, dude. Can I tell you those sometimes sometimes. Sometimes before Ariel would, like, in a funny way to, like, mess with me, she would squirt milk onto me, which is, like, funny, you know, like, I'm just sitting there and she comes up behind me. Yeah, I would do that. Yeah, I would do that if I could do it. Yeah, and squirts milk because it squirts out. It, like, if you, like, press it, it'll, like, squirt out of the breast. So she'll, she would do that for sure. But I never, I never requested a drink. Oh, you got some in my mouth. Try it again. Try it again. Try it again. Hey, can I get a drink of that? I went to the chai. I went to the chai.

Brian, Brian, I got to ask you this. And I do hesitate to ask it. It's only because you asked me. No, I have not. The answer is absolutely, find it disgusting. And that's probably why not disgusting. Like, listen. It's natural.

You're into what you're into. That's fine with me. I would be so scared if something came out while I was sucking on a titty. Like anything. Puss. Yeah. Milk of course. Milk is the only thing.

Everything else. Plus wouldn't be good. Yeah. Puzz and blood and anything else that would come out, I think is not good. But yeah, I think that... I like it dried out, brother. You know? You're like a dry...

Do you think they'll have a pill where they have like a chocolate milk coming out of there someday or something like that? Oh, okay. I have to take such nasty shits when I drink milk. It's kind of... Yeah. Wouldn't work for me. Well, I don't think you would be... Yeah, you wouldn't be having enough where...

You're talking about sitting there and having to go full. Two hours worth of milk. Oh, yeah, that's a good point. Your stomach's going to be fucked, man. He's on three hours of just suckling milk straight out. Eventually, there's no more milk left just for those who don't. I'd be sucking on the titties and then taking a bite out of a chocolate chip cookie. This is great.

It's great. I'm like, Sandy Claws over here. Dessert time. So this guy goes on, so the chive posts, obviously, let's discuss the perfect boob ratio for, you know, finally science reasons. We're not going to read the article because who cares what the chive has to say. It's obviously there's no right answer to it, right? Well, these guys have some opinions, I think. This guy goes like this.

He goes, the perfect boob ratio is boobes. Never in my history of tit exploration. have I ever been upset or given a thought about boob ratio. And I dated during grunge. Never knew what kind of warlocks were under those flannels. And I was never surprised by what was presented. And I dated during grunge. When the clothes were dead.

I'm glad he clarified what he meant by that, which is they're wearing loose fitting clothing, right? Like flannels and stuff. So you can't really tell. But he's just saying he was never upset. Like whether they were, you know, I wish I had the t-shirt. I have it.

I wish I still had. Oh, with the different kinds of boobs? I'll get you the t-shirt with different kinds of boobs. Well, don't get it for me because Brian does send me t-shirts sometimes. What was the one that you sent me? I made my family disappear. Yeah, the one that looks like you're a family annihilator. It's a home alone shirt, but it just says I made my family.

Like the whole psychotic shirt. T-shirt hell.com. No, this is from the chive. Okay. This is a chive shirt. Yeah. Here's the shirt. I have the actual exact shirt.

I'll make it the picture for the episode for everybody to. This is the shirt that my sister-in-law got for my father-in-law. Does he still wear it? I don't think. I wouldn't think so. But it's like just, it's a shirt that says they show all kinds. And then it has like different kinds of tities. It has like, I can't.

I can't read them. It's too small. Yeah. It has. Oh, my God. You got to zoom wet. Pointers Mailbags

Hot water bottles Blockbusters Coat hooks Water wings balloons cupcakes so yeah some guy sat around I mean the thing is Some guy wrote that

Some guy made that shirt That's not AI You know what I mean But he could wear Your father your father-in-law could wear that I feel like He doesn't see a lot of people But I think politically

Like I don't think anybody It doesn't align with his values anymore I see. He's gotten Christian like over the year because he's going to die soon. Yeah. So he's kind of like oh I love Trump

and Christianity. Kind of a smart move when you're going to die to get pretty Christian. I might do it honestly. God, if we didn't, if I wasn't so vehemently opposed to AI, I would go and have AI make a different

kinds of tint shirt to see what it comes up with. This guy goes, I agree, the best boob ratios is ones you can fit in your mouth. I mean, you fit any boobs in your mouth. Yeah, you're not fitting a whole thing and you're, yeah. I mean, if you are, that's crazy. That is actually not the way you do.

And as a guy who sucked on a titty or two in his time, I did lick. But I think, like, I didn't also, I didn't understand how it worked. So I didn't really know what I was doing. So sometimes I'd just be licking like all over the team. Yeah. You know what I mean? Would you do a little tongue rotation? Maybe get that.

Not on the nipple. I would go all over the place. I didn't know where. the erogenous zone was. So a lot of times I'd lick liquor suck on the nipple and then I'd lick the top of the titty and the side of the, you know, all over the titty. Yeah. He's just licking her

all over her body kind of. Yeah. She's just wet when she comes out of there. She was and I would have chapped lips covered in the whole situation. She's covered in slime. Covered in slime and were you a hardcore smoker at that time? Yes. I smoked a lot of cigarettes. So she comes out of slime smelling of cigarettes.

She just stinks. We'll step outside and smoke a cigarette real quick. We'll get back to this. She walks outside and she's like steaming because she's so hot. Oh, from being sexed up. Yeah. She's like, damn, this is the fucking most erotic day of my life. You lift the whole tit.

No guy does that. No guy's ever done that. I can specifically remember doing that and thinking like, well, the whole tit is the thing. You know what I mean? You got to get attention to the whole thing. I'm going to do the ABCs in cursive with my tongue. on the titty on different parts of it. That's, you know, driver wild.

And I wish I would have known the deaf tones. I wish I would have, I knew root, but I didn't know you're supposed to hum when you did that. I don't think it will. This guy goes, what's it like? Was this like an eye exam? Quote, which looks better, this one or this one, about the same. How about this one or this one?

And then the next guy, Canadian guy says, probably Chris James, that's an exam I'd love to be a part of. Is that you? I, listen, I don't, I, before I was straight edged, I did a lot of internet posting and I can't recall everything I said, but I don't think that was me. I don't think I have an account on the chive. This guy goes tit 11, tit 12, tit 13, tit 14. And then the next guy replies and goes, what a coincidence. I also count titties when I'm trying to sleep.

Not only more fun than sheep, but get you better dreams. That's funny. Yeah. You do a comedy podcast, Mike. This is what this guy's doing kind of is. He's like, again, it's, it is nice because it's like, I appreciate guys like that a little bit because everyone is is so old and horny in the comments and they're getting so horned up that he kind of pulls in. And he's just like, let's have a laugh. Let's calm down a little bit.

I will say this is a 2023 post. So this is, I believe posts. This is before the purge of Chivettes. Yes. Because the chivet purge. Did you know that? I didn't know this. What happened?

They've got rid of chivets on the chive and it was. They're selling out for advertising dollars apparently. So no more chivets. There's you, they still show pictures of hot women. Yeah. But they don't have chivets as part of the stable. And then we found out yesterday last week on the bonus show you'll hear about this that they're also removing the former chivet's comments that they, because they'll post a photo.

comment to the guy and be like, don't I look sexy? I'm a chive-a. You know what I mean? They're removing those and spam now on the website. What the hell's going on? Everything's upside down. Oh, they were, Mike, we got so much content out of them getting rid of the chive-vettes because it was just they were, I don't, they were radicalized.

They're like the January 6th rioters, basically. They're so mad. I've never seen people so mad. It's like, you can go to like any website. site. And they're all mad. They're like, it's all only fans on here now. What the hell?

I was looking for some big boob content or whatever yesterday and the day before. And like I was, I found a sieve, you know, the game civilization. Yeah. It was a post on the sieve forums. It was like best boobs of all time or whatever the fuck. But it was so funny like seeing these like old forums from like 2000. three, 2008 or whatever. And they have like those threads that are like, um,

uh, just like a big boob free for all or like post, post your favorite boo or like who's the hottest, uh, you know, wrestler with big boobs. Those threads are so funny, man. If you search big boobs for them,

you'll end up like on a boat forum. Yes. Yeah. A world of Warcraft forum. Everything in the off topic forum. It's like, who's got the nicest boobs in the game or whatever? it's funny when you type

because I did it a bunch of times too and every time I typed it was different websites and it's just like man like the internet was basically just guys it feels like the internet was basically just guys masturbating for like for like 20 years I think like from 1990

whatever when it became cut from 1999 to like 2015 it was all just guys talking about masturbating And then from 2015 to like 24, whatever, it felt like it was like the internet had some good stuff and then now it's just horrible AI shit. So there was only a very small window

where it wasn't strictly masturbation or strictly AI. Guys, it is, Mike's right how weird it is to be on like, again, we're doing boat, boat guys next week. So that's why it's on my mind. But to be on a boat for him and be like, hey, this is, this isn't the off topic thread. I just thought we posted pictures of the women with the best boobs. Yeah.

Post a GIF of the hottest chicky. Like, what are you doing, dude? And Giff, it's so funny, too. That's the other thing. So we did feed guys.

We did all those other guys. Like, boobs guys are so obsessed with a GIF. They don't want a still picture. They want the shirt to come up. Yeah, yeah. Like,

that's all they want. This guy goes, do you count them one, two, three, four, or 246, 8. Good question.

Well, then he replies and he goes, whichever way put you to sleep, sometimes they have the opposite effect, and I become wide awake and horny, which leads to masturbation. Meds sleep. Win, win,

TMI. Sometimes I think about disembodied tits and start jerking off. Like thrashing in the bed because you can't. This guy, this is a great one. And this guy goes, to quote the immortal words of Al Bundy,

Hooters, Hooters, Hooters, Yum, Yum, Yum, Hooters, Hooters on a girl that's dumb. Yay, Bundy. So when does that post from? Two years ago. Good Lord. Al Bundy is like 1990. One show or something. Prime chive time, though.

Yeah, yeah. These people are still living. They're old guys for sure. I mean. Well, they still live in that time. We're, they're like unmoored from time like in the book Slaughterhouse Vive. They're just stuck into time where they were watching Al Bundy. Yeah, the roundup of like best boobs for these guys is like the chick from Dukes of Hazard or something.

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. A Hooters girl I saw on a calendar in 1993 was a lot of them. This guy goes, tits, who cares? Ooh, hang on. Well, he gets a reply and goes, no reason to be a jerk, dude. that's not what the chive is about. If you don't want to view a gallery or don't like a post, that's cool, but no reason to be a bully about it. Yeah, don't bully me by saying that you don't like it.

You make me feel bad for how much I like them. Yeah. I went to Quora. This guy asked an interesting question. Why does Wonderwomen have big breasts? Like in the comic books? No clue. I think probably the same reason every single woman in comic books have big boobs

is because they're drawn by horny people who are online all the time probably posting in these very far. And also the media is consumed by horny losers is why they... Yeah, people who don't see women ever and don't see women as real people and live in a world where they are only objects. I mean, this is a well-tread topic, I feel like. and that's just funny to pick out one comic book character and be like, I noticed she's got a pretty big boobs.

What's a deal with this? Guy reading, he's not even like a boob guy necessarily. He's like a comic book guy. I just noticed this. Yeah. I just noticed this woman, this Wonder Woman has huge tits.

This guy replies and goes, because she's supposed to be super hot and beautiful. So she has general balance between all things that are considered attractive, tan tall, busty, curvy dump truck. She's also like an Amazonian princess, right? So she's supposed to be like, tall and voluptuous or whatever. But I don't think an Amazonian princess has to have a huge boobs.

I'm not saying she does. Mike's like, what's the point in watching? She doesn't have the big tits. Yeah. Yeah, I feel like the tits are there specifically for people to masturbate to. That's my feeling. here's a 3.7 star restaurant. It's called Hooters.

It's in Lebanon Pike and Hermitage, Tennessee. Three point seven stars is as bad as it gets. You're never going to get. Again, I keep forgetting to review that Airbnb I stayed in. Where they, where it was where they made me wait in the lobby for a full hour and a half. And then the woman yelled at me and said she was bleeding all over the place when I went to check in. What? Yeah, and Brian wants to go give it the five out of five top review.

I'm not. Was it a thing where you went there and you couldn't get in or something? So yes, you had to check in. I swear to God, we got a place like this. We got like an Airbnb one time in like Georgia somewhere. And we went to the place and we showed up and the key for the code, the thing wouldn't work. And we had to call some person who had to call like a management company to like,

And because they own like all these properties. Yeah. That's. I mean Brian's was actually like there was a rental office there. Like it was just set up. And she was bleeding. They were like they were like, you're bleeding out. Yes.

They go, you need to sign the contract when you get here and they'll hand you the door keys. So just go to the lobby and do it. Lobby's open 24. I get there at 11 o'clock at night. And I'm there for until 1230. There's nobody in. There's nobody at the desk. Brian's told this whole story.

So to save, you know, obviously, if you're not a Patreon subscriber, maybe you haven't. I don't know if you told on the stream possibly, but yeah. But you, Brian befriended a German family and then they tried to figure out what was going on with this woman. She came out and said she's bleeding all over the place. And that was the reason why. But Brian, it wasn't really. She was fighting with her boyfriend. It sounded like she was fighting with her boyfriend on the phone.

It was Florida. It was a very, a lot of people who have been to Florida and lived in Florida. and Miami and stuff, we're like, this is a very normal experience to have happened in Miami, Florida. It made me so mad. Hooters, 3.7 stars. Ricky says frequent this Hooters, maybe once a month or so. The service is always subpar. Waitresses seem like they hate their lives.

Food is decent most of the time. Four stars. Just to defend the way, the servers. I think they're called servers now, but it's classic for a hooters guy to still be using the term waitresses. But like, yeah, I, I, think, listen, I think maybe some of them have to deal with some really... Getting called at by 65-year-old men all day? Yeah, I don't know, man.

I think it would maybe make me kind of feel shitty about the job a little bit, too. I mean, again, like I said, like Hooters isn't a strip club. Like, families go there. Yeah, that's a... I don't think families go there. They do. They do for sure. Like, I've been at a...

I think when I went to that Hooters, I saw, like, a family. And I was like, what kind of dad, like, brings me? like young son here. There's also down here, they're also, I think maybe you have them up there, Chris, also, but there's a Hooters adjacent place called Twin Peaks. Yeah, we're going to read some Twin Peaks, too. I've never, I've never heard that. We don't even have Hooters in Vancouver at all.

No, like you don't. You have the closest one to use in Winnipeg. Yeah, yeah. Well, I think they're, well, so you're telling me there isn't one in Calgary anymore because that's closer than Winnipeg. I searched Hooters, Vancouver, BC, and a Winnipeg place came. Okay. Winnipeg is really notoriously very cold to frigid temperatures. Hey, hey, hey, not too. Hey, nothing wrong with that at Hooters, if you know what I'm saying. Yeah, the funny thing about Hooters, but the thing about Hooters that it's not, like I said, it's kind of a family place.

I don't think it's a family place. It is a family. It's crazy how they try to make it like a family eatery. And it's like, but the whole purpose of your place is kind of like a sexual day. Yeah, that's very odd to me. Like, I get like a guy, you know, a really horny guy being like, no, honey, we're going, we're going to have a hooters, uh, wings. We're going for wins tonight. Like, I mean, several thousand times a day. Like that has to happen where some guys like, we're on a hooters and like, you know,

a guy laughing at his son staring at a waitress. You know what I mean? Like that has to happen like every single day. Chris, when you say that, when you say it's not a family place, like when you look at the reviews, people take pictures of their family and their kids eating. at Hooters and give it five stars. When you say it's not a family place, it hurts our feelings, too. It hurts like our families there. Because in America, it's a family place. If you want to go to a non-family place, you go to the Tilted Kilt, which is an ass restaurant, not a Tits restaurant.

I guess so it's not a 19. I always thought of Hooters as being like a 19 plus or I guess 21. Oh, no. The first time I went there was 15 with my friends. Burgers and fries and wings, but also short. Like, I always thought of Hooters is being. Like, I I thought it was a bar, though, like a bar restaurant, you know? That's how I'm picturing it. It's more of a restaurant than a bar. Like I said, me and my friends all went when we were 15 because we were like, oh, my God, this can be fucking awesome.

Yeah, it's so funny, too, for that to be your business model, like horny 15-year-olds and horny 65-year-old men. How can we ever survive? This guy gives it one star. I recently visited Hooters Hermitage, Nashville. and unfortunately my experience was deeply disappointing. Here are the issues that led to my dissatisfaction. This is one of Chris's favorite kind of reviewers because he's trying to sound very smart.

The smart Hooters man is here. He goes, beer selection and service. Two types of beer listed on the menu were unavailable, and the Guinness that was served was not poured correctly, detracting significantly from its quality. Oh, my God, you didn't get a perfect pour at Hooters? lack of knowledge and engagement from waitstaff the waitstaff seemed unfamiliar with the beerless and did not offer the option of using a QR code for more information additionally the service was cold and distant throughout our visit now see that's fair and that I understand because if they're too warm and friendly yes then there's these guys who are like well sounds like somebody wants a date So they kind of have to do that for self-preservation, I would imagine, right? It's totally like the guy that I, like I said, the Mormon guy, I went to the titty bar with that one time.

And he bought like three lap dances. But when he got back to the lap dance room, he said, hey, you don't have to do this. I just want to talk. And then he went and bought her a rose and gave it to it. Oh, man. That's why I'm saying, like, I do, I totally understand that if I were a hooter server, I would probably keep my like distance from the people there after my, you know, I would imagine they have so many uncomfortable experiences.

Yeah, there has to been so, I mean, for, you know, somebody doing working at like as a in public facing job like that of waitress or, you know, even somebody who's like a cam model or sex worker or something that has to be like approached by these guys like over and over and over like getting like super attached. I mean, we see it with the, the porno guys who are like obsessed with Jennifer Aniston and stuff. Yeah. These guys think they're in whole relationships with like Elon Musk and stuff. And it's somebody who, of course, like we've all been to a, to a restaurant or like a bar or whatever where the server is being like really friendly because they want to get a good tip, obviously.

Or because they're friendly. Who knows? Like maybe maybe they're, but a lot of the time like maybe overly friendly. But yeah, at a place like Hooters, I would imagine that could be dangerous. Hey, hey, hey, hey, look. Frederick's here again. waiting for it to open. There's got to be like a certain type of personality that like a certain guy has

who are they just get like super attached like that when somebody shows them any bit of kindness or something. Yeah. That's scary, man. And scary. And then the idea that it's that kind of guy, DB, but he's also that guy and he's going to Hooters to eat. So he's like super horny and really desperate.

And he's just like, yeah, he's like waiting out every morning with a three piece suit. And it's a bouquet of flowers in the starking on. And again, and again, it shows what, like, a lot of these... Is Amber working today? Can you hand me... How about you just give me the schedule? She usually works a morning shift on Wednesdays. I wonder if everything's okay with her mother.

She was saying her mom was going through some problems the other day. I got that was fucking weird guys, man. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They have to hide her. They have to hide her at the break table. They're like, you don't have to serve for an hour. I'm not here. Yeah, yeah.

This guy goes, poor service and neglecting duties. Our waitress failed to clear the dishes, did not offer water refills, and took an excessive amount of time to serve beers. There was no initiative to check if we wanted more food, drinks, or desserts. Furthermore, we were not greeted when we arrived, nor bid farewell when we left. And there was a noticeable lack of work and smile. No one's mad. Tata to us. Nobody bid us farewell.

had hooters. I will say at a restaurant, there's like some restaurants. There's like, there's like a Japanese tapest place in in Vancouver and you go in and they like greet you. And then when you leave, they like do a big greeting. But like I'm like, oh, that's like wildly that like feels so nice and stuff. But you can't be expecting that at any restaurant. No. No, it's crazy. And then he goes, inattentiveness and unprofessional behavior. We experienced an unacceptable. Unprofessional behavior at a hooters. Poor shame. We experienced an unacceptable way to be seated.

Our waitress was frequently distracted, spending considerable time on our phone and engaging in lengthy conversations with a colleague, neglecting her duties to us and other customers. Spending time on a phone looking at like ways to contact police and law enforcement in a situation of stalking. These issues collectively marred our dining experience. Oh, they collectively. Mard our dining experience. Shut the fuck up, buddy. Shut the fuck. And Houters, Hermitage, Nashville.

I had hoped for a pleasant evening, but the service and attention to customer satisfaction were severely lacking. I believe that addressing these areas of concern is crucial for improving future customer experiences. And what I believe is, this guy and his friends went and they... Harassed the waitress. Yeah. Exactly.

And there is this. He didn't reciprocate, yes. There is this idea that this is what my friend said, talked how they got us to all go to Hooters. Who was it that wanted to go to Hooters? Aaron, Sean, you know, Nate. It was like everybody. It was all of us. So it was probably a fucking nightmare for anybody working there.

You know what I mean? Yeah. And Theo was there because I remember when we were pulling away. Holy shit, Theo. Theo is like, because he heckled Nick DePaolo. He didn't heckled Nick DePaul. So he's like, it's tough for him to hold his tongue in a different way than Brian. Yeah.

And he just couldn't like, he just wasn't a guy. He's joking around all the time. You know what I mean? And rest in peace to Theo, right? He passed away. He's alive. He's alive. Oh, shut out.

Is he rest in jail piece? He's not in jail. I think he's doing okay. Get him on the show. No, we're not getting any of those guys on the show. We've been angling for porno, Sean for a long time. Everybody wants to hear porno Sean tell his story. Buddy, you don't understand how much I would love to talk to porno, Sean.

And you know, you know what he's up to. You know, you see his Facebook post and stuff like that. So you know what he's up to. He's around. Yeah, he's doing. He's still racing. It's still racing. He's motorcycle.

He never got his shop up. He never got his store. No. It didn't work out for him. And now physical media is all the way out. So it's not like he's going to do it now. Yeah, he's going to like just picturing. Sean, like, I had a computer and a scanner, just did it.

How do I rip all of these fucking DVDs? Time to start the website I've been thinking about starting. I think of doing a porno website. I've noticed. Squarespace.com. Now that I'm retired, like he retires and he sits down. He was like, it's time to start this porno website that I'm planning I'm doing. Just a little dream thing, you know.

But yeah, I remember we went in a big selling point. Was somebody had gone with their parents. I don't remember which one. See what I mean? Yeah. Parents taking their kids there and stuff. I don't know. These are in Groveport.

Yeah. Probably, yeah. That's all of the United States, though. That's like we're so, uh, Myrtle Beach and Groveport, Ohio, like all over down here. You're right. And so we're, my friends like, it might have been Theo, might have been Sean. I don't remember. Sean, his dad was kind of a pervert guy.

So it was probably Sean. He had. And, but there was another one of your friends who's dad. was a pervert too. Oh, yeah, Theo's. Theo's dad was also a pervert. Yeah, yeah. And Jeremy's dad had all the playboys on the...

That's right. That's who I was thinking of Jeremy, whose dad left pornography out in the living room. In the main area of this ball. If you take one of these, put them back. I know how many are there. It was just playboy, though. It wasn't like...

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, I'm sure the hardcore stuff was in his bed, Jeremy. Oh, no. I bet they do. But I remember the big selling point was like, oh, yeah, man, these waitresses, they have these big boobs and they'll come and sit at your table with you and have a conversation with you. That's awesome. It's really cool, man. Like, you can really get to know them.

You can feel a connection for once in your life. Yes. And that did not happen. And we were not, none too happy when we left. Yeah. And now I think about it and it's like, why would. What did you expect? Would you say the fact that they didn't sit?

down at your table marred your collective experience. It did. We were so bummed when we left. We were like, oh man, you know. Maybe just an off day for that. We trust. Yeah, yeah. This guy, uh, by the way, I'm just going to say his name. Your agent John Clark went to the Dayton Hooters, Dayton Ohio Hooters. Yeah. And he gave him five stars. Stopped in real quick after an appointment yesterday. The bar. Appointment. Just buried my mom. She's talking to you A parent teacher conference A parent teacher

Confer Stop there real quick after an appointment yesterday The bartender Had a badass tattoo On her right leg Such a funny thing

That's a badass tattoo Dude She was nice funny And had great suggestions She convinced me to switch sauces last minute. I'm glad I did. Oh my God.

See, this is a sad. This is like, this is sadder than the other one. Yeah, he's feeling a connection to her. Like, we had this really funny conversation. She told me about her,

her favorite sauce. It was Buffalo Ranch. I'm glad I did. Everything came out piping hot and delicious. All the food, all the food was. was hot. I mean, I guess that's, yeah, but to me, that's like that pretty much every single restaurant experience I've ever had the food. If it's meant to be hot, it should be hot.

Yeah, yeah. And this is a five-star review. This guy had a real connection with the waitress with the badass tattoo, I believe. Yeah. He goes, everything came out piping hot and delicious. The place was very clean, which I'm going to tell you this right now, and I didn't cut the picture and I should have. There was a guy that sat at the bar and was like, Zoom. zooming in on pictures in like the kitchen and the door going into the kitchen it was not clean it was really bad really bad that was one thing i remember about the one i went to was that it felt very unclean and not in like a christian way but in like an actual way all the all the all the staff is on adderall uh and all the managers and stuff were just trying to fuck the waitresses so it's like nothing gets done that's happening at every restaurant yeah

At Hooters, it must be just like, though, yeah. I mean, that's what, it's just straight up customers going to Hooters and then they're just like, this was an incredible experience. Where do I apply to be the manager of this? So I can then have some power of peace. I remember always thinking, I always remember thinking Theo because he would tell everybody he wanted to be a porno star when he grew up. Like he would say that even at school. Like he got trouble because they said, what do you want to do for a living? He said, I want to be a porno star.

I tell you. I have my friend Adam who was like, you know, I might get into doing pornography. He was pretty serious, but he never did it, though. He never did it. Yeah, it's crazy. I always remember being like, you should just get like a job at a strip club or hooters or something like that. That's close. You know what I mean?

A little stepping stone maybe, yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Sometimes recruiters will go into hooters to look at the managers and see if they're going to I don't think it's a crazy idea that pornography. related people, like sleazy porno directors and producers might actually go to Hooters to eat. He goes, I'm glad. And then he goes, the place was very clean and I was in and out in less than 15 minutes.

I can't wait to stop by again the next time I'm in the area. Five star service all day long. Recommended dishes. Sauce, fries, buffalo chicken. Hey, you got to get some sauce. Have awesome chicken tenders there, dude. Yeah, this guy's name is Joseph Rockstar. Okay.

He gave it two stars. This chain is feeling tired and overall and needs it reimagine to become the leader of the restaurant business it once was. He wants the top's lower cut. Well, what? Oh, God, I can't wait to read this to you. It's going to, it's the sauces. He goes, the wings are small and overpriced. The sauces also seem tired.

Although I will give kudos to having a ghost pepper sauce that is. really worth the name nice heat the burger on texas toast was along the same lines as all else just a mediocre experience of quality and flavor that does not leave the old donkey very excited about a return trip anytime soon now this guy's gimmick is he uh this guy has a review gimmick and i calls himself the old donkey he takes the takes pictures with the old donkey the stuff d or so he has a this gentleman and he put it on the table. If you didn't think it was scary enough to be a server at Hooters,

you've got a guy who's setting up his stuffed E. or Donkey and taking photos of it eating salads. And talking about how Hooters can become the top of the restaurant business. Oh, yeah. I'd imagine this guy was very pleasant to talk to. Now, this is nuts. This is off R slash Hooters. The new shorts ruin the atmosphere.

My wife and I. I can't stop looking at the asses. I'm missing all the titties for the asses. I'm missing the titties because I can't stop looking at the asses. Is this what you're trying to do to me? It's a thing. You can't see the, you can't see the titty through the, through the ass forest or whatever. My wife and I purchased the wings for a year last black Friday.

What does that mean? Wings for a year. I don't know. So we've gone to Hooters at least once a week for nearly a year. I see you can make a purchase and you get wings for a year. Yeah. I see you can buy something. That feels like a real desperate move.

And they did. I just looked it up about family restaurant, by the way. And it seems to me like from what it's saying on Google is that they're trying to become more of a fan. They're trying to rebrand. But that's a recent thing where they're really trying to rebrand as a family restaurant, which seems, I don't know. It's still weird, right? It's very weird.

It's like there's, are they going to get male waiters in host? and stuff like that again, you know? It's so funny, man. Your restaurant's called Hooters, man. Everybody knows, and you've done a great job of drilling on to everybody's head about what that means. And now you're trying to reverse course and say, actually, we're here, we're here for family. We have French fry and we have, uh, yeah, we got a kid's menu.

We got a little pirate pack for them. The food comes out, a little pirate boat. That's white spot. That's white spot. They have pirate packs, by the way. That's White Spot is a Canadian family restaurant. But yeah, it seems like it's almost like a cultural thing, Hooters. Like it's beyond, you know what I mean?

Like it's referenced, it's bigger than just a restaurant. Yes. Like the idea of Hooters just being a big breast restaurant is so ingrained in people's mind that it does feel impossible to get the branding away from that. Right. He goes a couple months ago, the locations in our area switched to the gym style shorts. We both think they look ridiculous and kill the atmosphere. Ironically, I can see the change alienating couples like us more than the male clientele.

The girls are sweet, but unlike single men or groups of men, we aren't there to socialize with them. Like many women, my wife enjoys looking at sexy girls and in a context like Hooters, she doesn't mind me looking either. Such a nasty, hideous guy. So he's trying to say that like he's better than the single guys who are, okay, but he still is there just objectifying. Just to ogle. Yeah. I'm just here looking at them. I don't even want to talk to him.

I just kind of look at their tities. I've read a news article one time, but a guy who's smacking asses in there, and I would never do that. I'm just there to look at them and get horny with my wife. In the only atmosphere, my wife allows me to look at women. My wife enjoy, oh, he goes, she doesn't mind me. So we enjoy Hooters as a fun, lightly sexy environment with the new short. You know what I mean?

And then you're bringing your toddler into this place. Yeah. Other people have their toddler. Obviously, other five-year-old. Obviously, people know what it is. This guy just said it. Yeah. Like the sexy.

It's not full sexy, so it's not heavily sexy moves. Yeah. He goes, my wife enjoy. Oh, he goes, with the new shorts, though, the pinup mystique is largely gone. Visually, it's like a wet blanket. Once the wings for a year is over, there won't be much of a reason for us to return. I'm talking about this. She simply, she independently thought about the male regular.

won't come because of the change, but people like us who go there for a more visual experience will be disappointed. And indeed, we've not noticed an uptick in female customers, other couples or families since the change. If anything, a clientele seemed more male dominated than before. Also, these are not the old shorts. I regularly went to Hooters during the 2000s and 2010s, and the girls then wore variants of the dolphin shorts. These new shorts are not the same. They look like unflattering modest gym wear. While I have a hard time believing that anyone comfortable with going to Hooters was bothered by the skimpier shorts they introduced in 2021.

He knows that he knows the rotation of the shorts. He knows when they implemented the new shorts. That's crazy, bro. The Hooters expert this guy is. But only on the only on like the, he's like busy thinking about the uniforms. You know what I mean? Like, come on, man. You know, and he goes, while I have a, oh, he goes, it would at least be understandable to return to the dolphin shorts.

They were still cute, but this new uniform is like a repudiation of the entire concept. And the stupid thing is the place is called Hooters. The outfits remain relatively skimpy, even if they aren't particularly sexy. People bothered by the concept won't suddenly be okay with Hooters because of the uniform change. That's a good point. He is making a good point. we've been saying kind of honestly that is like it's hooters man it's known as a boob restaurant you don't have to like covering the women up aren't going to make people suddenly go who are like

you know prudes or whatever they're not going to be like okay now we can finally go to hooters and eat some way yeah uh so uh yeah he goes uh let's take a look at some book names i got off of good reads um i think this book is called and i don't have any reviews for them just going to read you of book titles. Oh, this would have been a good, I'm not trying to get on you, but this would have been a good opportunity for your famous game, real or fake. Real or fake? No, I've heard about this.

I'll tell you, this book is called Sexy Big Boobes Girls Photo Book. The Best Photographs of Erotic Models to Relax by Harold Richardson. Harold Richardson. It does have five. Perfect name for this guy. Yeah. Doing this kind of activity. The best photographs of erotic models to relax.

is a really good name. Hey, I'm just trying to fucking chill out. Kick back. You know, it's my day off. I want to look at my sexy big boob girls. This one's called a sexy big boob girls photo book.

Beautiful photos of beautiful models. A wonderful gift for 18 plus lovers by Sean Wood. And where do you go to get this? Where do you go? I got it. I found these on good reads. And they all have really good reviews. They all got like four and a half to five stars.

I'd love to get together with some of my buddies and goof on a book like this. This one's called Big Boob's Special Premium Edition of Sexy Girls by Kevin Smith, parenthesis, photographer. Oh, okay. So it's not. So when he's not doing the movie stuff, he's doing still photo. I like that. And finally, I do have one with a review. And this book's called Big Boobes Busty Women of Divine Breast.com by,

Jeff call putting dot com in the name of the title are these just AI books or something they're from divinebreast.com these and listen you know I got the call show you guys the cover you don't usually see dot com in the title of a book I know but it's a specific website oh my god go to the website right now divinebreast dot com divine breast dot com go to it by I will hold on I got a divine well here I'll read the review by Michael. Beautiful ladies. There are some beautiful girls here in great pictures. I love big boobs. Even though the girls are fully clothed, you must use your imagination. I wonder what's going on under there. Well, it's fair though, because a lot of readers,

they prefer that, right, to use their imaginations. Like, I like the book versus the film because I like to imagine it. So that's probably a really smart decision on behalf of who is that, who's who wrote that one? Sean Wood. Sean Wood. All right. I got a few more Reddit posts and one more Quora here. What? I'll read you the Quora because it's an Ohio State University graduate. The.

Right. That's you. You're an Ohio state. Well, yeah, but I'm not this guy. Yeah, I know. But he's one of mine. We're both alumni. Yeah, you would.

Yeah, you guys have a certain camaraderie. Yeah. And he's answering the question. Are men naturally attracted to breast or is it learned behavior? Hmm. I don't think it's so much the. boob. A boob is a part of a woman's feminine body. Anything that indicates that some person is part of the gender associated with a particular orientation will attract somebody. It can be

boobs, ass, facial features, scent of any number of things. I happen to like a diverse group of things about women. I love huge boobs and I love flat chested women. I'm particularly fond of nipples. A nice large, rounded ass has me naturally want to grab it. A certain type of ass makes me want to spank it. I've been with very feminine women, androgynous women, and very butch women. Something about them all screams out to me that these are women and it attracts me to them. I've seen guys who are very pretty and if they wore women's clothing could pass for a woman, but for some reason I'm not attracted to men, no matter how pretty they look. I don't think men will ever be able to explain what it is that makes women attractive,

although they could try. So, I mean, it's a pretty deep philosophical question, I guess, and what does make a woman. I don't know. I think that, I mean, obviously, most people sucked on their mother's boob when they were young. Or didn't. I didn't, probably.

You didn't. I honestly don't know. I just did that a couple weeks ago, yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Sometimes I go over and do it now. Sorry? Sometimes I go over and do it now. You go right, mom.

When you're home, yeah. Yeah, you know, I'm going to stop buying suck all on your titty. It'd be great to see you, Brian. It'd be great to see you. This person is off the R slash But one of the boobs redits And they go I heard you like busty bad girls

With big boobs Here I am I think this is the busty R slash busty women Uh This guy goes Holy shit I could suck on those tities for hours

Okay Somebody clip that Somebody clip that Who's in I don't clip that Actually This guy goes You heard right

And then the next guy goes Busty means The same thing as big boobs You don't have to say, so I hear you like big boobs girls with big boobs. All right. Thank you, Professor. Thanks, Professor. Yeah, we're all in here to look at this lady goes,

trust me, these are big. And then she pulls her shirt out. Her tibis are bigger than what they look like. Damn. I don't have that one here, and I'm not going to put it on the screen. But she's wearing like a T-shirt and it don't look super big. And she pulls it and the boobs start bouncing. They're very big boobs.

Yeah, I mean, I think that probably that some, women do that well they'll wear a looser thing because they don't necessarily hey i want to go out and do something and not have a bunch of guys ogling at my huge boobs or whatever so it is nice i i think they must appreciate that that they can put on loose clothing and hide the big boobs in right and then also also in like a porno situation it's like surprise yeah that's nice yeah it's a big time surprise and i i'm trying to think if i've ever noticed a big surprise like that before. I mean, probably. I'm trying to think of even a famous person. I think maybe who I was really surprised had big boobs because she doesn't necessarily wear revealing clothing a lot was

Susan Sarandon. Oh, I had no idea. Yeah, she has big, big breasts for sure, Susan Sarandon. But yeah, she definitely. She's a busty one, her. She's busty. She's busty. She's busty big boobs. Also, Velma from Scooby-Doo. I've seen a couple of images of her. Wonder Woman from the cartoon. Great boobs. Yes, some great boobs. Gwen pool. That's Deadpool as a woman. I don't like the name. Like, I don't like you know.

Say it again. Gwen pool. Isn't that deadpool? The woman deadpool? I don't know that. I'm not sure. I might be wrong about that. There is a female deadpool, though.

I know that. No, that's right. That's right. Yes. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. So that's a Listen I'd love I'd love to make out with a female

Deadpool that would probably be fucking crazy Just have a makeout session Just kissing and stuff Kissing maybe we fuck I think Should be trying to get a bunch of annoying jokes off the whole time Yeah that I would hate that See that's the difference between me and you

It's not annoying to me I love it I love that You wouldn't be cracking up when you're trying to suck I love a good laugh man She bring up Oh, you're sucking on my titties like their Chimmy Chong guys and I go crazy Spilling milk everywhere

Milk flying all over Stop, stop, I'm trying to suck This guy goes, the bra got me hard Now I just want to fuck you silly And suck those tits lovingly like a baby Oh That is so vile To see

From a woman's standpoint That's probably really hot A baby wants to suck on my shit. And then right after saying, I want to fuck this, like, I want to fuck you super hard and then suck on your boobs like a baby. There's more bras where this came from. I got a whole mess of them.

So. I mean, she could sell her bras to these guys. They would buy them. A thousand percent. Put them on their nose and do whatever you do when you buy panties or a bra from a lady. I definitely think people are doing that. I think bra is selling is, you know, like people who are online, maybe only fans, like,

There's entire forums dedicated to it. I'm going to start wearing a brawl on the stream and then sell it. Sell it. It's over. 200 bucks. Have you seen that guy on, I think it's TikTok or Instagram who buys baseball player's socks and he smells them and licks out of it. There's a market.

There's a market for everything. There is. There is. That is a crazy baseball player's socks. They get really stinky, I think is the idea. Stinky, nasty. Yeah. Yeah.

Because I remember when I used to play, I used to play baseball. and they would definitely classically hockey gear is the most famous thing for getting really nasty but I remember my baseball socks would get

they would smell real bad you still got any those laying around or I just found my baseball the guy waits outside of a baseball the guy waits outside of like the minor league baseball field

or it was like you mind if I just pop around through the locker see if anyone talks to me away I did find my baseball tweets I'm the janitor. The fake janitor going into.

Yeah, dresses like a janitor and fucking walks in with like their own like cart. I'll take some of those towels too. God damn. I wish I could sell my underwear. You can. You can. You can really.

You've said this a lot, Brian. You've talked about selling your underwear. I think you can if you want. I don't know you'd get a lot of money for them or whatever. But message me if you want to buy my underwear for a two. $200. There you know. If you want to buy his underwear, do you have the famous underwear that you had to

rip the penis? No, I threw it in a trash crates. Oh, dude, that would have been like 50 bucks. I use the ripped crotch underwear when I fly. Yeah, ripped crotch. You buy Brian's ripped crotch underpants for $200. No, in all seriousness, do send a message to the Instagram or to wherever if you want to buy Brian's underwear.

My smelly underwear. They're not smelly. though, you know. But I do sweating them motherfuckers, you know, because I'm on the treadmill. And so if you want to smell what my ball sweat smells like to get you horny, I'm totally okay. Only 200 bucks. Only 200 bucks.

This is really gross. Why is it gross? Let me look up when I get paid here. Thank you, Mike. Thank you. So at least somebody is going to. This guy goes, got to squeeze these to verify. This guy goes certainly always sucking and drinking and eating yourself everywhere, even in public available.

What? I think he's saying, so this is what I can translate this. I think he's saying like, I constantly want to be sucking and drinking your tits and eating. And then he says everywhere, even in public available. So I think he means like, I would suck on your titties at Hooters or Applebee's or I can't name anything other than restaurants. Time in place, bud. time and place. Yeah, yeah, come on, man.

This guy goes, you're the kind of girl I used to have sex dreams about as a kid. This guy goes, perfect. I'd be proud to walk along with you on my arm, watching all the men and some women staring at your beautiful boobs. I would be so hard knowing that they want you, but I'm the one who is going to enjoy your body the moment we are alone. Honey, do you think you could tuck that under while we're walking around the ball? I didn't even think about the fact that it's like a guy walking around with a boner.

You darned on. It's winking it guys. Yeah, I bet you want a piece of this, don't you? Yeah. No, you would love to suck on that. Take. Oh, my God. Well, that is all the boobs.

You know, that's all my boobs posts. I found this episode really weird to prep. Yeah. Because again, I like to prep on the treadmill. I like to go down to my gym, set the treadmill to like a six incline and a three mile an hour, and just stand there with my phone and fucking, you know, figure out what I'm going to do. Now, if I did that and I went down to the gym and I stood on the treadmill and I was like, you'd be on a list.

It would be weird. I think people in the building would be like, can we do something about the guy that looks at chesty women on the treadmill? You don't have a cool, you don't have a cool building management. Oh, well, Brian's already in some issue, having some trouble at his, at his building where his downstairs neighbor complained to the, like, to the actual building that he was, and I quote, talking and laughing. No, bouncing a ball and talking loudly and laughing. Yeah, and he doesn't have a ball. You don't even have a ball. He doesn't have a ball.

He ain't a ball. I have two of them, baby. Yeah, but you. Maybe that's weird. Yeah, I was bouncing my balls up and down. No, but you weren't, you obviously don't, you're not a basketball player. You're not a hooper. You're not, you know, you don't play soccer.

I'm, I'm, you know, I used to play basketball quite a bit. Yeah. But I feel like that when he told me that, I was like, that is actually, that's actually the craziest thing. And now you have an enemy for life downstairs. I hate them. I do hate them. I suggested that you go. down there though honestly

I know you'll never do it but go down and introduce yourself and like bring them something you know what I mean like hey I'm new and I just wanted to bring this for you and say hey I'll do my best I don't have a ball up there I wasn't bouncing a rubber ball I'd be like hey I'm your new neighbor upstairs and I really like throwing this ball around I thought you might

like it too yeah I thought you might enjoy this I don't get the shit yeah it's a great way to piss off your neighbors just throw this at the floor over over This is a medicine ball that I have. So what ended up happening, though, was I went to the, because they put it like a citation on my door. That sucks, man. And I was like, I'm going to the rental office.

I put my coat on. We had just got done recording. I go to walk across the street to the rental office. And I get in there and I'm like, we got to talk about this. And then the lady's just like, hang on a second. I'm bleeding all over the place. I'm going to deal with you in a couple of minutes. Well, I was like, my job's talking.

And when I said I was moving in here, I said that I talk for a live, that I am a podcaster and a streamer. Like, I said that. I hope they enjoy this one, by the way. They will not miss because they were like, what's your podcast? No, I mean, they can hear you talking. They don't need to listen to. I mean, they'll miss DB and, and me. They won't get any of us.

But I mean, the stuff you've been saying, if they happen to be home right now and can hear you talking, I mean, imagine you're like, oh, sucking on the tithes, la, la, la, well, yeah, good. I love sucking on boobs. Yeah, yeah. My neighbor upstairs just won't stop talking about sucking on tithies. Yeah, you have your, you get a new citation for vulgarity. Yeah, let's titty talk up there. Okay. Yeah.

I go over the rental office, though, and I'm like, you know, I told you guys what I do for a living, and I was assured that wouldn't be a problem. But why, how could talking, you don't have to do it for a living. I agree with you. I don't, I don't, you don't have to specify my job is talking. You are legally allowed to talk. Talking. Yeah, I'm not yelling.

You know what I mean? Sometimes you get a little hype and yeah. Whatever. It's my house. Do you want me to send, do you want me to send your neighbors and no apologizing for cracking your ass up with some of my great one line? Because I feel a little bit. It's actually my fault. Yeah.

It's actually my fault. I've been really killing it lately on the stream. And, well, the truth is, of course. I used to tread the boards. For those of you who don't watch the stream and aren't on the Patreon and. don't watch the Twitch stream, which is Twitch.tv. Not even a show Sunday nights 5 p.m. Pacific Standard Time. That's pretty good plug.

But for those of you who don't know, this last stream was kind of an anomaly in that Brian had a full freakout meltdown because he was having issues with his mic. And then he's like, hey, I'm just going to like switch out the stuff. I'm going to like do something. And he didn't realize that he started streaming his desktop and him sort of messing around on his desktop. trying to figure it out. Yeah.

And then he screamed fuck really loudly right as the stream cut off. And then he was sort of fumbling around trying to, if you haven't watched that stream, make sure. I was getting up. I was grabbing my mic. I dropped stuff while I was getting up. Yeah. I might have been bouncing up.

So I empathizing a lot as well because that doesn't matter to me. I think that's not. And you're trying to dribble a basketball at the same time. Oh, we were laughing a lot because it was a brand new Tom and Bunny. sex club tour, which was fantastic where Tom showed us the best glory hole in the world. He said it's the best. He said it's so good because it has a green light red or a green red thing that you can tell somebody if you're in there.

He just thought that was the coolest thing. He said, he literally said, I'm about to show you the coolest thing in the world. It's like at the Brazilian steak restaurant where they have the little thing on the table where you turn it upside down when you want more food. Yeah. It's like when you want more suck, you'd turn it upside down or whatever. Yeah. And they did have, speaking of food, we did, we did get to see the menu at the sex club,

which was fantastic chicken Alfredo pizza and taco beef taco salad. Loaded Dorito nachos. Loaded Dorito nachos. Oh, sorry about that. Sorry about my toots. Oh, I had the loaded Doritos nachos before I started having sex with you. So anyway, I go over there and she was like, oh. man, I saw you walking over here.

I was like, this guy's mad. She thought you were, man. Oh, it's so mad. I was kind of mad. But then I said, like, listen, maybe I do talk loudly. I'm not yelling. And I only do it one night a week from 8 to 9.30, which we have quiet hours here, but they're like 11 o'clock at night, right?

And I was just like, it's not fair to say that I can't like talk in my fucking studio between 8 and 930. on Sunday night and then only during the day. It's like at the most, you're going to get two hours of me in the middle of the day. Yeah. And it's like you should explain like, hey, sometimes I don't even necessarily have enough material and we only go for like a hundred an hour and 15 minutes and then we have to maybe vamp it out to 1.30. So it's like, that's not that long. That's not crazy.

And but the thing that's wild about it is he has carpets because I was like, hey, man, get a rug. Get a rug and throw a rug down. That'll help. You're your window or your your your walls I was over there You could put you know you can get those like a stand Free standing like sound dampening things Or like uh

All of the all the soundproofing shit that you buy on like Amazon is shit But you can get like the the some type of sound dampening for it if you want to Yeah but that's the floor though It's the floor right there they should be oh yeah yeah yeah There is carpet there so what the fuck yeah there's nothing There's nothing more you could do You're it's and it's a new building. So,

right? It's new. It shouldn't be like old. I'm the first person to live here. Yeah. It should be concrete, right? Like, it should be concrete probably, right?

I really genuinely think that it is an unreasonable ask for you to never hear your neighbors. If you live in a building and that you just have to fucking live with it. And it's not overly loud. But in it, what ended up happening? Because I told the lady at the rental office. I was like, I don't want to think that you're building a fucking file on me. I'd rather just move.

It's what I said to her. And she was like, look, check it out. And she took the complaint and ripped it up through the tracks. Wow. And she's like, I'll call them and let them know. Because it's an unreasonable ask. It's not fair. I totally agree.

When you told me that I absolutely could not believe it, DB, what is your situation at you where you live? Do you ever have to deal with neighbors? we have we have some we have some neighbors directly next to us who it's like a family

they are like middle Eastern I think the Syrian I'm not sure but they there's a family over there the only problem I've ever had with them is their kids like kick their soccer ball onto my like deck but they kick it into like the

like the lattice that separates our two decks or whatever and they like come completely busted at all. And I don't give a shit either. Yeah. Go, go hog wild,

do whatever you want. But it was just very funny that like they just completely busted the fucking deck open with like a soccer ball. You've had some crazy like, you've had, you had the dirt bike neighbor and stuff like that, which is nuts. Like I don't mind it because when you live where I live,

like guys rev their engines here like, it's fucking outrageous. There's never a day goes by where there isn't some guy. grabbing his engine even when it snowed. Wow. Yeah, yeah. I mean, they'll do it all day

the lifted trucks guys or whatever. I mean, there's like a road out in front of my house. It's like a small road. And it's like not even enough to get up speed. And still like guys will do like a fucking barrel down the road and stuff. And I'm like, I'm praying that they, you know, I don't want them to hit a deer because it sucks for the deer.

But praying that they just fucking flip out and flip their car off the road or something. because it's just so annoying to hear it all the time. That's crazy to me. I'm so lucky in Vancouver. Like, we have that every now and then or whatever in the city, but it's so infrequent that it's not an issue. In my new place, I'm in a townhouse now.

So there's nobody above or below. Mr. Rich. Brian, we've discussed your apartment is larger, larger than my townhouse. Your apartment is more square. It's not that big. Mike's been here. But, but my neighbors are. My neighbors on the one side are Satanists and they have like a pentagram.

So they're fucking sacrificing goats out there all day long? I don't know, but no, they seem quite friendly and quite nice. But yeah, we don't hear them at all. Like every now and then we can hear a little something or whatever. But yeah, I guess I've had neighbors before who have been like a little bit. Sorry? I was just good. The neighbor, we had a crazy neighbor a while ago who was,

there was something that I forget what I think it was COVID I think I think it was back when COVID happened or whatever where it was like there was like a gas shortage so this lady was filling up these gas cans and storing them in like the outdoor storage area of like our apartment complex so every one of these like apartments or whatever gets like a little outdoor storage area to put like a fucking ladder or whatever the fuck yeah and she was like storing like gas can somebody took a picture of her on the Nashville subreddit at a gas at a gas station with her like back of her Honda element open and all the gas cans in it and she and they were like what is this lady doing and I saw the I saw the post just cruising red or whatever and I was

like holy fuck that is my neighbor who lives two houses down from me that turns out she was just like storing a bunch of gasoline oh Mike we talked about this with Tom Walker when we had them on for pyro guys is that I was just scrolling and showing Chris and Tom pictures of people's fireworks collections and they're absurd and they put them in their fucking garage. Crazy man. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

And it's so much. Yeah. That seems like you should be able to complain about that. I feel like like, hey, there's like a pretty much a just a big bomb that they're going beside you that you know, I emailed our landlord about it. I was like, hey, I don't want to be like a snitch or anything, but this is kind of weird or whatever. Didn't get an email back.

No, because it's not, he just said this guy, you know what that email did? It clocked you as a pain in the ass. Yeah, it is exactly what it did. They wrote it on your file. This guy's a fucking pain in the ass, man. He's always contacting us about his neighbor. This guy must drive an electric car or something like that. Doesn't understand the concept of gasoline.

Oh, this guy's got nothing better to do. Okay. The engine revving thing bums me out because it's like when we were poor, when me and my wife had no money, right? We had this 95 Achiva and it came, the exhaust came loose and was like hanging down. It sounds like the worst. I've never heard of it. I've never even heard that. It sounds like the worst car. I thought there was a fake made up.

That's like a Homer Simpson car or something. It sounds like a like comically bad car. Me and my wife had the Canyonero. I have the 95 Achiva. I got to look up this guy. I had a Honda Civic hatchback and had the same thing. The exhaust just got torn off. I think because I, I think because I drove over like a median and a fast food drive-thru.

I was like, I'm not fucking doing this. And I left. And I like fucking completely scraped the exhaust off my car. Awesome. Well, and so it came loose and was hanging where the engine was. It was so loud. It was a really loud noise when you drove it. And fucking one night, Katie was driving it because we had two cars.

We had that car that was really loud. And then we had another Nissan 200 SX. that one of the front tire only had three lugs on it because one of the lugs broke off of it so the tire was kind of it was a little squirley right and it did end up falling off while I was driving

I mean my my that did end up happening I knew it was gonna happen but it did end up the tire just fell off on high street which is the main road here in Columbus it's so funny having like a shitty car because that that Honda Civic hatchback that I had the

driver's side window broke so you couldn't like you had to like put it up with your hands or whatever and and you know so it was like there goes like going through any fast food restaurant drive through it's like you can't get your window down or whatever you got to be one of those guys who opens the door at the fast food place and then you're behind them and you're like oh Jesus Christ this guys hey get your priorities right and and I'm trying to save money on food so I Get this shit fixed, man. What do you take? The 200 SX had three lugs, so the tire just wiggled when you drove.

And it also had power windows. And the switch kind of broke. So I ripped the switch off and put a butter knife in the car. And you just stuck that in there. And it would spark a little bit. And then the window would go down. And I didn't think, I thought this will work forever. This butter knife solution will work forever.

It didn't. And Katie was out. by herself without me and she couldn't roll the window up so she had to park the car with the window fully up where somebody broke into the car and stole fucking everything out of the car but that loud car I had it was like a risk assessment in which like the wheel could fall off or the car could be loud right for for so we chose for Katie and Gwen to drive in a loud car and for me to drive in the car where the wheel could fall off that's nice that's nice that's That reminded me that my brother had the most insanely loud car, but like it was a Camaro, like a 79

Camero that had like so much horse. So much horsepower. That's exactly how Aaron had. That's 79 Camaro. Holy shit, man. Can I tell you? Coolest fucking car I've ever seen in my life. No, it's not.

It does not surprise me. And Aaron didn't build the car. He took it somewhere. But it was so fucking loud. Like actually insanely loud. And we lived in a complex. that had these big speed bumps and it was low as well. So he had to drive over on an angle really slowly every time he would come in and out of the thing.

So it was like a townhouse complex. It would get so many complaints over and over and over again. It was like you could hear like in the bedroom sitting there, you could hear him coming from miles away. Yeah. Like it was just insane. I don't know how my mom allowed him to do that. But yeah, I remember our, we had a neighbor who was a Dutch guy. He had a sign up on his.

thing. It said parking for Dutch only. That's how I do. And his name was Joseph. And he was like super elderly. And I can't even listen, I hated him when I was younger. But it was a similar situation as Queber with his neighbors where he's just like, this guy's such a fucking asshole. And meanwhile, you're throwing lit cigarettes over on his. The same sort of thing. It's like this old man is like getting to the end of his life in his small. He just wants some peace and quiet. He's living in Richmond suburb like right on the water and this nice kind of townhouse complex and then every single day and every single night the loudest car in the whole city comes and wakes his ass up because my brother would come home super late too you know like 12 1 in the morning did he have that that she was

always compounded by you had a shitty car but also you had a fucking subwoofer in the trunk yes did you did you guys did you guys get into that up there where you had like oh yeah huge huge as speaker box in the trunk and just fucking rattling your shit. Rattling. I never, my brother didn't have that. And yeah, my brother's car was like pristine super nice. That Camaro, it really was. It was just like it looked super nice and it was like really powerful.

Like you could drive it so fast. But yeah, I had friends who had the classic. My friend Adam, that I mentioned who wanted to be a porn star, he had like the classic where it was just like it shook and had that horrible rattled sound and it sounded so bad. It sounds good. And he would sit, Theo had it, and he would sit in the front yard and just play it. It would drive my parents fucking crazy. Speaking of my shitty neighbors, I also had a shitty neighbor who would sit out at 7 in the morning.

He would sit in his car and listen to rock radio. And I could hear it in my house. Yeah, yeah. So you would listen to like the DJ and stuff. That's nuts. Like a rainbow in the dark. And like, I'm listening to this. I'm in bed.

And I'm like, Jesus Christ, dude. I got to buy this motherfuckers. some air pods or something. Yeah. Well, the loud car we had, Katie got fucking pulled over and they gave her a ticket because her car was too loud.

Fuck. And I think about that every single day still when I hear a car, Revit's engine and drive by right by the police. And it's like, well, see, your car was doing it not on purpose. They're doing it on purpose,

so it's legal. You're not doing it on purpose. So we're going to give you a ticket. It's a tax on poor people. Yeah. Yeah. Having a car is the worst thing you could ever have. Yeah.

And it's the one thing you fucking need. Yeah. Like in most places. It's no wonder like all these guys are like, you know, take pride in it or whatever. It's all they have. It's like all these car guys. I mean, they dedicate their entire lives to like, you know, detailing the car and putting a sound engine in the car or whatever.

So it's like, of course they're going to be an asshole driving it around and showing it off. Yeah. It's just a really bad personality trait, I think. It's just like having it's like using it. To me, it's like showing. off your dishwasher or something like that. Like the car's a fucking tool. Yeah.

And I remember when I just bought the recent car I bought, they were like, you can get this, this, this, this and this. And I was like, just give me the most basic version of the Honda Civic that I can get. Reliability. Reliability is what you're looking for in a car if you're not a car guy. You just don't want it to give you any trouble. You just want to be able to get from point A to point B, you know, least amount of fuel or whatever, like things that save you money and then don't give you a hassle. That's what I'm

concerned with. Yeah, the car troubles that we had were sincerely and no, the worst part about being poor was dealing with the cars because they're constantly breaking. Yeah. And it's so expensive. Yeah. Totally. When you have no money at all. Yeah. I mean, you got to get insurance. I mean, I drove for so long without insurance and then got pulled over and they got my license suspended because I I was too broke to buy insurance. They threatened the same thing. Sorry, go ahead, Brian. Katie got the same thing, got pulled over on Christmas Eve and they fucking made me come and pick.

Like they let her, they took her home to my parents' house on Christmas Eve. But then somebody had to go pick up the car. They just left the car on the side of the road with with the expired tags or something like that. So I had to then get the car. And then my dad, this is one of the only nice things he's done for me ever. drove behind me so the police couldn't run my license. Yeah. It's a classic move.

Yeah, my... Follow me so nobody. Yeah, don't run your license plate. That's the plot of Spoky and a Bandit, basically. All right. We, uh, it's good to be back next week. We'll do boat guys. Uh, so boobs them boats.

Maybe I'll, you know, for the episode after that, I'll make it a B, too. But subramboes. The Bambos. The Pranos. Well, we were going to do Sopranos guys, and then we decided not to, but then I was looking at the Sopranos subreddit, R slash the Sopranos, and it is fucking crazy. Have you watched the show? You watched a show completely, right? Not all the way through.

I watched like it as few seasons of it. The thing that I, listen, I'm a classic meathead when it comes to Sopranos where I'm just like, I don't want to see the mafia parts. I don't want to see him talking about his psychology, a psychiatrist. He's talking about his feelings. Yeah, not interested, man. I watch other shit for that kind of thing. When I'm watching a mob show, I want to see them just doing mob shit. Yeah.

And there's not enough shooting people in that show. All right, we'll see y'all next week. Mike, you got anything you want to plug? My whole. I think this week on YKS preview, we're talking to, we sat down with Brett Gelman. I'll take things that would have made sense seven years ago, Alex. Brett Gelman. It's such a funny pool, man.

A guy that just went totally off the rails. Yeah. He plays like he seems like like a nice guy. Yeah. Like he's a guy that was a good guy. I disagree because I always thought, okay, this guy's playing kind of an asshole or whatever, but he's probably nice or whatever. No. Nope.

He's not nice. I can say that even before all of the, you know, that stuff happened, I can say I did meet him at the Vancouver Comedy Festival many, many years ago. And I will tell you that he is, at least when I met him, and he was not a nice guy and nobody found him to be a nice guy. And a lot of the other people were commenting on how he was a very not nice guy. All right, we'll see y'all next way. Goodbye. Bye.