Guys: With Bryan Quinby - Guys: Episode 192 - Amusement Park Guys with Luke Taylor

Episode Date: October 6, 2026

This week on the show we had Luke Taylor from the STORES podcast on to talk about amusement park guys (No Disney) Canada's Wonderland has a bruiser problem. People give their horrible ideas for their own park, a guys gives a park a bad review because he littered and a couple of Mr. Cheapy Refunds get owned  To listen to the writers room, Chris's podcast with Bryan, Stefan, Chef Kevin, Mike and Jesse from YKS, go to patreon.com/notevenashow And for more Guys content, streams and SHOCKTOBER: a deep dive into shock jocks you can click patreon.com/guyspodcast, Join us on the Sunday Night Stream every Sunday night at 8:00 EST at twitch.tv/notevenashowand I am on https://bsky.app/profile/murderxbryan.bsky.social  Guys is on Instagram! https://www.instagram.com/guys.pod Guys has a Post Office Box now! PO Box 10769 Columbus Ohio 43201

Hello. I just gave Chris the thumbs up. Yeah, like I'm supposed to start. I figured you could start. Um, so we're here just to quickly tell you that the Geysery is open. We have, uh, merch for sale. We have two, three shirts, well, two shirts and a hoodie. One of the shirts has two. Just go look at the geysery.com and see if you want to, just go look at the fucking website.

Just go look at the fucking website. We got to, we got to hold your hand through the whole thing. I mean, sorry, this is not, we're not, we're not. give you a participation trophy here. You got to go and figure it out for yourself like we used to in our day. And yeah, it's only open until Friday. So if you're listening to this on the Tuesday, it's been open since Friday. It's only staying open a week.

So get it before Friday or you won't be able to get it at all. Yeah, do that. Brian's not even paying attention in this promo. Okay, bye. I am. Welcome to guys, a podcast about guys. I am Brian. And I am here.

with Chris James. Hi, Chris. Hey, Brian. How you doing, buddy? I'm a bruiser on this episode. I'm going to tell you something. These amusement park guys, nobody's more scared of bruisers than these guys. There's apparently a big bruiser problem at the parks. Like, around America and Canada. For grownups.

Apparently. So grownups are having an issue with... There is the team takeover. Mm-hmm. You know what I mean? So the teens are the teens. the bruisers and then the adults are scared of the teens or is it sounds like but listen we're going to read some stuff where you're going to be like oh there maybe are some bruisers yeah these parks but

let's get our guest on the show luke taylor hi luke hi guys great to be here you got to tell me is a is a bruiser just is it like a street tough what is a bruiser yeah it's basically anybody who intimidates you physically it makes you scared in any kind of space um me it's like a lot like me when I'm hanging around. Who has the big word that originates in the heart? Rockabilly. Rockabilly. That's right.

The rockabilly. Yeah, that makes sense. Rockabilly guys were like, we don't want bruisers coming to our events. And it's like, okay, that makes sense like that you guys have a bruiser problem.

Right. Your bruisers are one step away. It's like greaser to bruiser to rockabilly pipeline. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Greaser and rockabilly, we let them be the same thing on the episode.

Uh-huh. You got a little bit of pushback on the rockabilly episode. There was one guy in particular who wrote a really long thread about it. And he was, I think he was pretty angry at us about our ignorance. Listen, we're pretty ignorant about a lot of stuff. That's kind of the whole thing. He was very obviously a fan of Brace Belden. And he was like, Brace, why are you talking to these nerds?

And then he got in and he was like, let me defend by podcast hosts. No, but it wasn't even, I mean, listen, Brace was making fun of them just as much as we were. I think he was just mad that we got some actual information incorrect about about rockabilly. People like, like I think at one point I asked, so, so I said, wait, rockabilly is the type of music like three quarters of the way through the episode. And he that really got him. He's just like, one of these fucking idiots asks halfway through is rockabilly music. Like, what the fuck are you talking about? It is really, I guess, I guess if you're like a truant off and you're like, wait a minute, these guys don't.

do like extensive research on their stuff before they do it? Yeah, that's true. Yeah, that's true. Wait, is this show just making, is this show just making fun of people? What the hell? It would be cool to do. I'd love to, I'd love to hear a guys where there's, where we, they get the humor out of there. And they just start, they get down to the serious, you know, social, like, the sociology of it.

Let's figure it out. Anthropologically. Like, what's up with rock abilities? Like, what's going on with them? And what, what really motivates them? to be the way they are and how can we help them to come to terms with it. Yeah. A 10 part series. Each episode is 10 episodes. Is the difference between a rockabilly and a greaser rockabillies are like more swing daddies? They're like, hey, yo, daddy. I think they're more country music style.

And we definitely do deal with swing daddies as well. That's an entirely different thing. Okay, okay. That's the cherry pop and daddies as it were. Yeah. We don't like those. I don't like that I think now they're just called the cherry poppers or something. Yeah, they're called just the daddies. I guess if the two parts you could pick, that's the better one. You have to get, yeah. The cherry poppers? Yeah, or offensive.

Or any age now. Yeah, it's still pretty offensive. All right. Canada's Wonderland has a problem, and that problem is line cutting. Oh, and Canada's Wonderland is out in Ontario. I know it's been in the news lately because there's this guy who's like I'm working from home and I'm doing it

at Canada's Wonderland because it's like cheap to like buy a full pass and he get the food and all this stuff but then listen I don't want to call this guy out but it turns out you want to know what his job is that he's working from home Oh God is it one like ours He's a comedian

And he's like well you're not really I mean you're just hanging around the park You just think you just don't have a job so you're going to a theme park. Yeah, you're going to a theme park and you're like, you're doing your work. It's fine. You can just say that though. Yeah, it's like, but I think he's, he was smart with it because he's like, this is getting

picked up by the news. It's kind of going viral. So it's getting my name out there. It's kind of like really genius marketing on his part. But it did make me laugh because like it sort of revealed that like a little bit into it where I was like, oh, this is kind of an interesting concept. And I'm like, wait, no, it is. This guy has one hour of work to do a day.

But it's funny. It's funny to say you're working from home. Absolutely atrocious here. Nearly as bad as a Disney World. Just had nearly a dozen people cut while in line for Leviathan. Oh, shit. You get cut by 12 people. You got to, I mean.

You've got to get your, what you got to do is you got to hire yourself a bruiser to come to the park with you and stop those people. It sounds to me like in that situation, you could use a few more bruisers in all seriousness, right? Well, the 12 people are bruisers. probably. Oh, that's true. That is, I never thought of that. You're fucked, really. Yeah. Maybe you can get some crowd killers. Yeah, for like a bunch of crowd killers. But yeah, if you get cut in line by a bruiser, it's just like you just, I guess you're waiting longer at that point. You eat it. You just are you going to get bruised. Would you, okay, a question for you guys. Would you say something? I mean, if they're, assuming they're not a bruiser, would you say something. I don't think.

James would. You know that I would. I'm, I would. You a hundred percent would. Yes. I'm a more confrontational person than Brian. Listen, I wouldn't cause a big thing over it if they really, if it was like, once it became clear that like, oh, this is a bruiser, this is a person who's like willing to fight over this. I was actually maybe inviting it by. Yeah, totally. But I would say like, hey, man, we're all in line here. You got to go to the back of the line or whatever. I would definitely say something. He would. I've seen him, I've seen him like go after people in public before where I'm like go after people. You made two guys stop smoking crack. That's not true.

Yes, you did. I watched you. When did I make people? Hey, can you smoke that crack over there? Well, that's really. I didn't make them stop smoking crack. I asked them to smoke the crack in a different place. That's different.

We were going, we were hanging out around town in Vancouver and we stopped at a tiny little park where two guys were smoking crack. And you were like, hey, could you go smoke that crack somewhere else? It was a playground. It was a children's playground. See, this is what I'm saying. Without the context of these things, it really makes me seem like. get back out like I'm shaming drug addicts or something like that which I don't do at all.

Yeah like it was a children's playground and I just said to them, hey, could you maybe like go elsewhere other than the children's playground where the children are playing and smoke crack over there? Like that's all that I said. I'm saying it as in like bravery. I'm not saying it's a bad thing. I would never do it. I wouldn't stay away from that smoke, but these guys are going to be here doing that. Yeah, there was just kids at the playground. I just, I thought it was like an inappropriate thing to be doing in the. vicinity and the proximity of that. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I did remember that now. This guy goes, I'm at the point where I physically block them and tell them to wait in line like everyone. I was tired of this and tired mentality. I don't know about physical, physical, like you're physically blocking them. So now you are really almost engaging in like a fight already. I gave this a lot of thought too, Chris. Like physically blocking them and saying like you can't go by is.

probably the ideal thing that you could do, but you are really, the type of guy that cuts in line at anything is not going to put up with like a lot of, you know what I mean? Because he already doesn't have the social. Yeah, the social contract is a contract is completely broken for him. So and I also think the standing in line thing is very like there's an energy of like a dad crossing his arms, not moving, but also not. making eye contact with the offending party and just kind of like acting like a tree, you know? And it's sort of only creates more tension. Yeah. And I wonder about it. I wonder about like what the line situation looks like. Like are you physically able to block them? No,

I know they're long. But what I'm saying is they're like, are you in a hallway or there's things on the side where you can't actually physically block them? Because I think in some situations, it's difficult to actually do that without moving. And then once you start, if you start moving, yeah, if you start moving, like if they start trying to go and then you move in front of them like a bouncing about. Yeah, that is definitely like, what's up. Yeah, that feels like it could. I mean, listen, cutting in line is shitty and I hate it. It's a horrible thing to do. It is evil to do. And there is a theory on my end a little bit about this where maybe, maybe like one person, if it seems like one person's cutting in line, There is a chance that that person had to go to the bathroom and then was coming back to be with

their people. And I don't think that's a huge problem. If they're coming back to be with their people or even joining their people, I accept that. That's totally fine, right? If it's just like, you know, but yeah, if they're just cutting in line and they have people, you got to have people. Right. If there's 12 people, that's wrong.

Like, you can't be doing that. But this guy goes. You're making space in the line for 12 people. You're like opening up an area. You have to move out. the way. Yeah, yeah. It's not like subtle. You're like, oh, okay, the whole dynamic of the thing is going to shift as the 12 people enter. Well, this guy goes, I tried this and got screamed at and poked hard in the arm with a plastic fork as they push past. I sent a text message to the

that's incredible bruiser behavior there. Poking with a plastic fork hard in the arm. Shanked in line at Canada's Wonderland. I tried this. Yeah, did not work. Oh, well. Somebody he poked me with a plastic fork very hard. I mean, listen, that probably hurts worse than a pickleball hit in your face. I'll say that right now. I would say it hurts quite. It depends on again how hard they're doing it. But I mean, yeah, you could definitely hurt a plastic fork, the hard plastic fork.

You could draw blood with that if he poke someone hard enough in the arm. Yeah. And he goes, I sent a text message to the line cutting tip line, which does exist at Canada's Wonderland. I have not heard about this at other places. so Canadians must be a real fucking problem. I would feel, I'd feel, listen, it's the right thing to do and it's important,

but I'd feel like a real nerdlinger sending that message. There's some guys that are like, why you snitching, man? Well, that's, listen, yes, it just, I would feel like a nerd being like, excuse me, somebody cut the line. I'd like to report it.

Like, but it is, it is, there's nothing, they are the ones doing something wrong. They're in wrong. Definitely. I agree. What's the response time, though? Like, I don't understand. What is even the point?

Like, so that guy. guys come out from the park and then you have to go them they did it. Yeah, but then you have backup. Then you have backup. Then you have backup. You have security who's like maybe got a night stick or whatever that they could deal with. They could easily snap a plastic fork and have. You also have the, like that will enhance the bravery of the other person, people who have

been cut in line. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. It's true. It's true. You will have everyone behind. you then and I bet the response time is decent because they have this at like sporting events obviously right where like you can text a line and with your section number or whatever and then people will come over like if there's someone causing real trouble I don't know if they still do it but like at the sporting events where you can say hey come do this and then they have security ready so I would imagine

this is a similar thing I don't think so because he goes I called the text message to the line cutting tip line but they never came or followed up when I got to the front of the line I told the ride operator a thing I would never like that right there's over once you're at the front once you're there now it's time he doesn't give a shit it's time to ride now it's also time to ride now like

your ordeal is over you know you've gone to the front they're done they're done and you're complaining about our gone now it's your time to ride just just to be excited about finally getting there now don't keep it going now you know just enjoy the ride um the guy in a black t-shirt

and his crew of people, they got in line in front of all of them. Can you take away his ride from him that he just did? You see him? He's up on the ride right now. You see him with his hands in the air? We need him gone. We need to stop the road.

Well, maybe he wants to get him kicked out of the whole part. Yeah, probably. Right. Because line cutting is like everywhere I've ever heard of is you get kicked out of the park. Really? For a single offense? It's not a warning for a single offense. Yeah.

At Cedar point. point I know for a fact because I remember thinking, that's crazy. Yeah. Because I was a bruiser hanging around the park. Wow. I don't know. Me and my boys. I'm not sure I would call you a bruiser.

You definitely hung out with bruisers. I might describe you as the weasily instigator. I know. The problem is, and I'll say this right now, we went to Kings Island when we were 12 and my, with my aunt or maybe 13 or something. and she's like the cool aunt so she let us all smoke. Okay. Cigarettes.

I mean, yeah, I guess that is at the time. In hindsight, you're like, well, this is actually the, this is actually not the cool. Yeah. Yeah. Actually, she was like, you guys need some cigarettes. Yeah, I mean, on, oftentimes the cool whoever, when you're younger, you grow up and realize that's a person who's extremely irresponsible. Yeah. Yeah, I feel like I'd go to parties and it was like some people like, oh, this is cool.

Like their mom's taking out with us. And even at that age, I was like, yeah, I don't, that's not like good. You guys don't know that, right? Like there's like something bad happening here. Yeah, I've talked about it. It's kind of sad. Okay. It is.

I have, I had a friend who. I felt it too. I was like, oh, I don't want to smoke weed with my parents. I mean, it was good to have a place to go. That was what was good about it. Like having somewhere where it's just like, okay, we know we can go here and not get in trouble. it's like a party house. But yeah, I've mentioned my friend, he had his, like, his dad was like a real drunk

and we'd have him over the house and he would get, like, embarrassingly drunk. Like, he'd be the most drunk guy at the party. And, like, I think I have mentioned this a long time ago, but my one friend pantsed him underwear, underwear at all. And that was when it really clued into me that, like, oh, this would be a nightmare. This guy's a loser. This guy's a fucking loser. Wait, pants from a bunch of front of kids too.

Well, yeah. I mean, I think we were of age at that point. But still, I mean, like, maybe we were 19, 20. No, actually, no, we were teenagers. Definitely pants were in front of a bunch of kids. And he was, listen, this is a crazy thing too. He was a firefighter. That's a cool ass thing, you know.

But I remember people, I distinctly remember people wearing his firefighter outfit around the party. Like, just throwing it on, like, look at me. you know, like, I'm the dad. Yeah, it was really not. Yeah. Yeah.

We went. I'm sorry, just one more thing about this guy that I just remembered was that he ordered a bunch of pizzas for like this is like, the idea that this was the dad is so crazy. He ordered all these pizzas and then he went around collecting money and people were giving him like loose change like 15, 20 cents. And at the end of it,

he had like $3. And he had like, hundred dollars on pizza and he was just fucking livid like just so mad yeah that's so he he has to buy the pizza right i mean if he's gonna like he that is like he's breaking his social contract he has become kid if he can't he's he's a kid in that in that sense is like he's like you guys it wasn't like hey i'm going to get pizza for every link you're imagining a party where it's like hey you guys have a couple of beers i'm going to order you guys some pizzas he's just like you guys want to get some pizza yeah he's he's a party goer he in everywhere

way. Yeah. Party animal dad. Oh, I got party animal dad. That's cool. But my aunt was like, yeah,

you guys can go ahead and smoke. I don't care in the van. And so she drove us down there. We're all having them. Inside the van you're smoking. A bunch of us too. It was like six of us. Six 12 year old smoking in the back of a van.

That's crazy. And her other kids were there too. Yeah. Like the actual kid kids that are young. Oh. We're there too. So she was like, she was a very much of like having issues.

Very cool. Yeah, very cool. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She didn't do any, she does now,

but she didn't do anything. She didn't smoke cigarettes. She didn't do any, as far as I could tell, she didn't do any drugs. Now she's really addicted to opioids. But like before she was like clean, she just hurt her back at some point.

I mean, and, uh, so she was like clean herself. She wasn't like, can I see, be honest with you? That's almost.

kind of scary. Honestly, stranger. Because if it's, because if it's Alki parent and you're like, well, yeah, this is like, this 100% makes sense. Like, we had the same thing with our friend's mom where it was just like, she was so fucked up. We could do whatever we want.

And you're like, okay, well, that makes sense. Like, you know. Like, she wants somebody to, like, if he wanted, she wanted someone to smoke with. Like, she's like, I'm going to be smoking in the thing anyways. You guys all smoked together. Enjoy it. So I feel less weird about doing this in front of my children.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, it was, it's definitely strange. This person goes, I texted the number since these two kids cut in front of the three quarters of the lineup. Children?

That's what it says. Their mom tried to hit me after I tried to block them from cutting the line, but she missed, L.O.L. By the time I got off the ride, she was dealing with security and police. Oh, okay. The police, you don't have to get the police involved. Number one, she didn't hit you. Yeah, you can't like, yeah. She didn't even hit you.

And it sounds to me like, listen, I don't want to. take her side completely, but it sounds like the kids were cutting in line and you started somewhat of a physical altercation with children. And then you had to defend your children, the mom. Yeah. And then she was just like, hey, this grown man is like, you know, reacting to. Because it said mother. The mother did it.

Oh, yeah. No, no. I'm saying the guy, the guy, the original. The commenter has to be a man. Right. Yeah, the commenter has to. Well, yeah. You forget, that's male behavior.

I do feel like. This guy goes, there's a tip line for cutting. And the OP replies, these are the we. This is the most weiner reply. I did that a few times yesterday. Haven't gotten annoyed enough yet today. So they're going to do it a few times today. They're just serial tip line callers.

They're like people at the tip line are like, hey, can you take a break? Like this isn't meant for this volume of. You get one a day. Yeah. This guy goes, I did that once and they started screaming at me and threatening to beat me. Not worth it. I let them go now. Yeah, no, that's the right thing to do.

That's the right thing. He's correct. This guy goes, fuck around and find out, I fucking dare one of those little broccoli-headed idiots put their hands on me. I have zero problem defending myself in a violent manner. Awesome. Just openly saying you're going to hit a kid. Amusement park.

This guy is like a brute. He might be like an older bruiser who's like, you know what I mean? He's a former bruiser for once. Bruiser forever. Yeah. And he's just like, listen, man. Sometimes you look at an older guy and you think, oh, look at this old. guy you don't know what I used to be a fucking bruiser straight out of a kid I do not care I will

he has to be a vigilante because he knows that being a bruiser is wrong but he's like hey look if there's a chance for me to do it I'm using my powers for good fuck around and find out like such a funny thing yeah about people cunning and like listen we all agree that it's annoying or whatever but the idea this guy doesn't sound like I don't sound like he sounds like more like he wants to get into fight. He has a lot of anger and he wants beating people up and he wants like justification where he won't get arrested for it. I mean, the line, I'm not afraid

to defend myself in a violent manner. Like, you're saying those words are coming out of your violent. You're like, I don't mind being violent. Shit. Let's do it. I love being violent. And then so you're a assumption that is like the broccoli headed kids are going to try are trying

to beat your ass. So you're like, well, I have to defend myself. If I do anything or they'll beat my ass. Just a bunch of fucking 14 year olds. And also if there's a bunch of them, I could definitely see him getting the shit kicked down with my kids, which is that that's, you don't want to go down to my Jim Dandy mode out there where you're getting beaten up by children. That's the worst thing that could happen. Report them by contacting 289, 536 4-004. I had a group come up to me in line to ask if they can jump in behind me, told them to go pound sand. There was a mom and her young daughter behind me. How would they feel if I let these guys cut into their time? I mean, listen, he's correct. Hey, pound sand. Pound sand, I think probably struck fear into their hearts. But yeah, he's right. I mean, it's like, hey, can I come behind you?

It's like, well, no, you're still cutting in line just because you're not in front of me. He goes, text the line and tell the operator, this guy replies video the line jumpers and send the video to security. Works every time. And this guy goes, right, operators, don't do jack. A group cut in front of me and my daughter at Yukon right in front of the operator. And they looked at us. I intentionally blocked their last friend and said the only way you're getting past me was to jump over the guards. Operators still didn't do Jack.

So I think the guy ended up just getting past him without. These guys can't. The ride operators are doing nothing again, probably as a teenage kid. That really is the biggest tell is that if you are a kind of guy that doesn't understand why the service worker at the amusement isn't doing something that you fundamentally don't understand like a. huge part of how society works. You know what I mean? Also, they're, they're teenage. Yeah, that's what I'm saying.

It's like, why would they care about them? And what are they going to do? It's like, yeah, it's like, you're working at a store or something and somebody's like, you know what I mean? You're just like going in, you punch in and then punch out. Yeah.

Why would I chase down someone for stealing shoes from footlock? Why would I give a shit about this? What you got to do, what you got to do, they were on to something here. What you want to do is if you see someone cutting in line, you want to videotape them and you want to, you want to, posts on social media and tag Tizzy and E-N-T.

You know that guy who names and shames these people? That's what you want to do. You want them docks. Do you want to ruin their lives? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. They literally walked right past the operator. I'm not, I'm fine, not snitching. When I get annoyed enough, I start blocking their path.

And this guy goes, maintaining order means having to snitch with line cutters. And then this guy goes, fitching. Finch line, man. I mean, that guy really is living in a sort of a world where it's like, it's me, it's just, it comes chaos if I'm not here to snitch. And this guy goes, snitching means you were involved or had prior knowledge. Something was going to happen. And now you're saying, you're using said info to keep yourself out of trouble. When you see someone doing this, it's telling.

Oh, I see. So you're saying that you are going to. You should fight them. Yeah, you should probably fight them. You should fight them. If you're not going to help, then stop being surprised there's a problem. Snitches get stitches. is this stupid childish mentality.

You should have dropped once you got past 16. This guy goes, the line, the line cutting problem at Canada's Wonderland. Let me tell you, because I looked at other parks, right? And I looked line jumping. I searched line jumping and all these different subreddits for amusement parks.

And there were a few little things where it's like a guy cut, cut me in line and stuff like that. Canada's Wonderland has a legit problem. It's gotten out of control. Sorry. Is Canada's Wonderland? Is it just kind of a Cedar Point-esque, like, big theme park? Or is it like, is it super Canada themed?

Does that like the appeal? No, I don't know anything. It's just a theme park. I think. Again, it's in Ontario. So I'm like, it's in the Toronto area somewhere, I think. But yeah, it's just a theme park, I think. A pretty standard theme park.

That's what I think. It has like, it's a big one. It's huge. It's like massive. Yeah. Here's another person that doesn't understand the teenagers that work for the park. I was there last week. and this guy and girl got their food before us despite us being there first.

My girlfriend mentioned it to the girl at the counter and she said he didn't have a good pass but the girl did. So we challenged that and asked if he gets priority and she insisted they don't. Well, the girl getting her food before us kind of proved our point. So God. Listen, sometimes some food takes longer to get made than other food. So sometimes you can order before somebody and then they get their food first. I think people think in people's mind,

I think people think that they want the food to come out in order because it's unfair if it doesn't. Right. But what they don't understand is if the food comes out in order of delivery, then the problem is, Luke has to go and we're going to talk about him in just a second. Luke is going, you're dealing with some internet stuff right now. Cable guy. So anyway, yeah. So this last person goes, so when we were in Germany and skiing, kids would ski across

the top of your skis and cut in line. And this is back when people were civil. So what you did was you put bottle caps upside down on the front end of your skis. They got a surprise. Good story. Is it worth, okay, we got to read this one. I think you're going to like this. I'm trying to find it because there's, so another thing I found for amusement park was

ideas. Find it because you got me thinking about it, to be honest. because you read a thread of movie ideas. Yes. And I was like, what if I search ideas in the amusement park subreddit? Just the amusement park. So like ideas for how to improve or ideas for your own amusement park or what?

Yes. Both. So I'm trying to, okay, rules no IP, which is ridiculous. That's really. So what? So you have to make this up completely on your own?

This is going to be some horrible idea. Has to be a themed land, not a singular ride or a old park. So this guy goes, they're all very samey, aren't they? Wild West, dinosaurs, yon, yon. I'd like to see something different like a nuclear wasteland or South American favelas or a steel mill or something. Steel mill. I'd like to go to steel mill land Steel mill land

Like what kind of food do they have there and stuff I don't like a You go there and you get like a boxed lunch or whatever Like like you know like a sandwich in a plastic bag Something that they would bring to work Yeah I got to go to the South American favela land Now that's like favelas are like the slums The slum like the place is like the

really impoverished parts of like Brazil and stuff. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's, uh, so, so that feels like I'm not sure that that would really work so well. No, I don't, I don't think so. I think that might be sad and it might come across this mean spirited and stuff like that. I'm not sure that would really work that well. This guy goes, a hollow earth, Jules Verne, Disney's Atlantis inspired land or maybe just a really excuse me.

Well, I want you to hear this because this guy goes, that's mysterious island at Tokyo. Disney C and the guy replies similar to it but it's different. Okay. Mr. Bad Ideas. So let's take, I have another thread. If there was an amusement, this is from random questions. If there was an amusement part completely themed about you and your life, what would it look like? This sounds like one of the dumbest questions I've ever heard.

It is a question for idiots, number one. But the first one. It would be a lonely and boring place. This is what I'm saying. Like the people who are on fucking Reddit answering questions and stuff like that, the idea of like, what's your life like? You know, it's a, I'm not saying every one of them, but I think a lot, a large, large amount of them are like, yeah, I'm pretty unfulfilled and, uh, and lonely and bored and upset

without things turned out. It's like, it's lonely, it's lonely and boring land. It's lonely boring land. You basically, yeah, there's like a ride where you, do the same thing over and over and over again and you get very little fulfillment out of it. This person goes, I would have four lands. Okay. I'm listening.

Jock land. Jock land. Football, baseball, soccer, and wrestling. Hey, this is, this is what I would have probably. You know, I would have Jockland in mine. If we're talking about mine, I would have Jock. What would, is it amateur wrestling number one? No, it's territory wrestling for me, obviously.

There's like a headlock ride where like you get. grabbed into a headlock by the ride and you got to get like slowly moved around an area. Um, there's a long headlock. Um, and then I would, you walk in in a big guy with a big gut and like that's going really bald put you in a headlock for one hour for one hour and that's a right. That's what other. The lines are incredibly long for that. You like struggling to get out. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. We'll probably need like several big. Guys with big guts and ball hits.

You'll need a couple of guys with big guts to do the headlocks because they go on for so long, too. That's the thing about it, right? Is that like, yeah, you're waiting for a long time because of how long the headlocks are. Guys become big fans of one of the guys. So the line for him's longer than all the other ones. There's a real sad guy who no one wants to get a headlock from him. You would have Lego land, but that's already a thing. Yeah.

That's already a thing. But I would have like sports land. That would be part of mine. corn you'd have new metal the new metal area for sure that would be awesome that would be kind of fucking cool to be honest oh i could already think of a uh uh a ride idea what ring around the rosy okay i could think of one thing that we would have there i thought this is what i thought you're going to say one of those costumed characters but it's a monkey the monkey yeah the monkey would be there for sure this guy's second land

is Marine Corps land. Marine. So he was in the Marine Corps. Apparently. That one's a scary one to me. I know. I don't know what you're going to do in there. But I guess you're Amtraks, LSTs, LPDs, and LHAs with MCRD just for fun.

I don't know what any of that means. I don't know what any of those are. They're probably not good though. Yeah. I mean, it's never been framed being, listen, I'm just going to say this. Being in the Marines has never been framed. is fun to me. It's not like, yeah, it's supposed to be really hard work and grueling and yeah, like, but I guess

there is some, right? Like if you're in the Marines, there could be some water rides or whatever, like you're on like a, you know, you're on like a submarine that goes down. You know, there could be some shit like that, I guess. It's not. Yeah. Fire department land. Okay, so this guy was in the Marines and now he's in the fire department and he likes sports.

And he says with engines, trucks, ambulances, and technical rescue. I'm going to rescue people This would be a popular one with toddlers though If it was geared towards young people seriously Yeah but whatever That could be the kids area right Where they like they go on their own little Fucking fire truck that like goes across the thing

And then you have water and sprays out some stuff I think that's kind of fun And then finally is fourth one Retirement Land It'll have easy chairs footstools, love seats 75 inch TVs and beer on tap I don't know what that was. Like this is a theme park.

It's a theme park. You can't just put somebody in a recliner and give them beer and sit them in front of a 75 inch TV. I mean, it's not bad. Maybe they have like fantasy living rooms. Yeah, maybe they have that at W. Shed. And maybe you're doing that while your kid is, you know what I mean? You're relaxing. That's like a parents area when they want to relax or whatever.

This guy goes, uh, oh no, this guy goes. they have them. They're called libraries. What? That's where you go when you're when you're retired is saying? No, no. This is another person saying what their amusement park would be. Oh, their amusement park would be a library. They already have them. They already have my favorite place where I would, where I consider what I consider to be the dream and that's at the library, just reading a good book for free. this one just the most pointless reply you'll ever see uh i wish i had time to detail what i'm picturing this is very cool thanks for the food for thought oh okay so i listen i'm not going to write out what my

idea is but i promise you it's very extensive and very impressive inside my head this one this guy does give us a longer one he goes haunted house okay that's norm that that's had a lot of them already A bunch of celebrity meetups. Hopefully. Hopefully you get a Justin Baldoni one. You get a Baldoni, you get a Brad Garrett meetup. Michael Loftus. Loftus is there.

All of the Bubba the Love Sponge. A guy's celebrity, a guy's celebrity, a guy's celebrity, like what are the like guys con and you go like get your picture taken with Michael Loftus, Michael Noel. and drama rants. The Fartal. Bub of the Love Spunge. Jim Brewer doing stand-up. Yeah.

Now they do what you told you. Now they do what you told you. Yeah. So he goes a bunch of celebrity meetups, concert venue, Japan section. Okay. Don't like that.

I'm not a fan. Just sorry. UFC Octagon. So do you fight in it? I don't know. He did just say Octagon. It does. seem to indicate that you fight in it.

Huh. Okay. Okay. Marathon route. Origami section. A bunch of delicious. That wouldn't be in the Japan? No.

And hang on a second. What did he say? A marathon route? I think you got to run a marathon. That's so hard. I know. These guys don't have fun. ideas at all. They're all like

the one guy wasn't that bad who he's like, this is my life, you know what I mean? And he's like, firefighter, marine land fucking rescue or fucking retirement land. That was the best one I've heard so far. Not good, but the best one I've heard. And he goes, a bunch of delicious food like curry and spaghetti. Okay. Listen, they've got, they do have food.

They do. So Korean spaghetti is so this guy just like, these are the foods. like so this is what would be there okay the first part would be you watching other people ride the rides eventually you'd be able to ride the rides but first you have to build them yourself that's the worst idea ever race horses lewis and clark alister crowley and mexican food race horses so maybe you're doing like a you know a horse racing ride or whatever you're on horse i mean what's what are they called there's like they already have those and here's

the strangest answer. Lots of fun rides and good food for ages 12 and under, but for those 13 and over drinking and drugs of plenty. Thirteen? What is that? Who wrote that one? Your aunt? It is really, uh, it is really something. Yeah. So that's the ideas that I like that. I like, I like, I like ideas. You know, I've become a bit of an ideas guy myself. Yeah. I, I, I, hey, I know how to make my own park too. Yeah. I mean, listen, making a guys park would be fantastic. But guys park is what we would call it. All right. Hey, Luke is back. Hi, Luke. We didn't say anything bad about you. Sorry about that. Luke was only, yeah, Luke just took a little quick little 17 minute break in the middle of the, well, it was 10. I actually looked up, but 10 minutes. That's longer than what I thought. I was

being, sorry, I was longer than I thought. I totally felt we, the time flew by because we were learning about people's ideas for their own theme park. I have a question for you, Luke, if you had to have a theme park that was based on your life, what would it look like? Um, it's a good question. I think I'd go body where it's like Luke's stomach is a ride and it's sort of like dealing with like, like it's, you know, you're dealing with it's very like bad in there, you know? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, like the inside of the stomach. Inside of the stomach. Exactly. You're riding through like the, the gastrointestinal track. And you see. see like, oh, there's like, oh, we got some problems in here, you know.

Yeah, some scary portions of it. It's called colonoscopy, the ride. Yeah, exactly, exactly. You go, you can, well, it's the first ride where you can go from one way or the other. You know, you can go up through the ass or you can go down through the stomach. Oh, I think, yeah, I think I, I think I, everyone knows. The ass is the better one. There's a big, much longer line to go up the ass.

I'll say that. Yeah, yeah. It's more of like a log flu ride on the way out, but the way it is really the one that's like, It's like a big roller coaster where you go up, up, up, up, up, you know. Yeah, I like that. That's a good. That's good. I put you on the spot a little bit, but that was a good answer.

Okay. So here is an absolutely insane post that I saw on R slash theme park. This blew my mind. Okay. Anyone with a dream to open a theme park, please contact me. I'm currently looking for people to jump on the adventure of making their own theme park. The best way to do this is if we work as a team. I've got a head start as I'm a designer and I've made some model demos, although I would like to update them.

I also have a company that can find a perfect spot for our park and organized construction, although that'll be neat. That'll need to be funded. Find a perfect spot. Listen, there are going to be some spots, but we have, there's a lot of those big spots are taken in good areas, you know, nowadays with like as far as it's got to be a huge plot of land. You also need like sewer, electricity. Like there's like you're, you need a huge pot of land that definitely that's, that if you could afford it,

you would need to then put every utility there. Right. Yeah. And, and then it needs to be like, I mean, it needs to be in an area where people can get to it. Right.

Like it has to be like. I think that part is not a big deal because there is, there are like opens because like Cedar Point is one of the biggest parks in the world. Yeah. And it's in Sandusky, Ohio. But that's because it's one of the biggest parks in the world. So that's what I'm saying.

You can do it. But you're like, it has to be accessible or has to be like you have to build an incredible park where people are, it becomes the destination. Can anyone is there is there? I mean, obviously this guy's dumb ass. But I can't even think of any situation no matter the size of the park where you could

start a theme park like a small business. I guess like a traveling carnival is kind of that. a little, but even that's like own thing. Yeah, you're right. You feels like it's something only for like ultra rich people. It's almost like buying a sports team or whatever. Or saying I'm like starting a mall.

You know, we should all get together and open a ball together. We should talk to some of the stores. Like we should talk to some of the stores and say, you guys all want to get together and we'll put all your stores together in one place where everyone can come shopping inside. This is, this keeps going though.

He goes, we'll find a perfect spot or spot an organized construction, although that'll be need to be funded, of course. Okay, so that's the big thing there. That's what? We don't need like guys to come help. You need money. You need a lot of money. A lot of money.

It's one of the most expensive endeavors I can think of. Can't think of a bunch of many more expensive things. It's a crazy amount of money. I love just glossing over that, you know. It's like, yeah, yeah, yeah, we'll have to be fun. And we'll worry about that later. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. We just think guys with big hearts here first.

He goes, I've also contacted ride manufacturers to see what rides are best to start off with. There are some secondhand rides that are thrills and cheaper than others, but are very old models that us coaster enthusiasts do not like. Oh, so this is a co-this-this-a-thusie. This is a thusie. Little bro was playing roller coaster tycoon for so long. he's like, I could probably do this. This is a focy though, Luke, if you know about these are like a particular brand of person who goes around and rides roller coasters all over the place and they like keep score.

Keep score of how many they have and all of this stuff. And it's like a big thing where it's like on. Now that makes a little more sense. This person is just like. They're trying to ride every roller coaster, Luke. So they will go out of their way when they're traveling to stop at a park that has like a kiddie roller coaster so they can get the credit. Because you get a credit for your score and there's an actual thing online that like ranks people or whatever. So this is somebody who, imagine somebody who's really into skateboarding and is just like, imagine I have my own ramps in my backyard.

That's what we're dealing with here. Right. But on an infinitely greater scale. Yeah. Yeah. I've also been speaking to them about new rides and there are some families slash kid roller coasters that are cheaper than expected around 100,000 to 200,000 to 200,000. thousand dollars anyway we should not make the big jump until we all do our research together i also have a demo website nearly done and i've started my doesn't even have the what doesn't

even have the demo website asking for help and he's not even got the damn demo does anybody know html i'm trying to use this wicks website but i can't figure it's going to run your amusement park i don't think so he goes i also have a demo website oh he goes an idea i've already startup my business model and ideas and planning permission. As well, I have contacted brokers and investors so we can see where that takes us. If you feel like joining in, we'll be an honor to have you aboard. Okay. I mean, listen, who knows? That'd be funny. We get an update from this guy and it's like, this is actually a guy. It's great. It's going up. No, it's not. This is two years ago. And this guy goes, although that don't need to be funded, yeah, let me know when you get this a little bit.

sorted. It's like, hey, you don't get to jump on once it's funded. Yeah, come on. I get what he's saying. But he's saying the exact same thing that we're saying, actually. He's laughing. But if you want to be a part of it. Right. You got in that you want to, he's looking for investors. He just does know so little about how any business works that he doesn't know that's the word he needs to use. And, and he's, I think, like you're like you're, like you need somebody with hearts. So somebody who's in it for the right reasons. It's like, we want people with imagination. We want people who are going to come up with this crazy cool concept and then we'll go to the investors with this crazy cool concept. I just,

I think this is again, I just don't think this is a thing that happens. I don't think you start from scratch and start a theme park, you know, just with a good imagination or whatever. I don't think that if you've never worked in the industry, like if you've never worked at in the industry and you went to investors and are like, I really like roller coasters. Listen. Yeah, I don't know. I don't know if, yeah. I know a lot. I've ridden basically all of them. So you're, I'm the guy you want to pick. Yeah. I know. Yeah. I feel like they also just like in J. Obviously this is stupid, but like in general, they don't even like I feel like there really aren't that many small amusement parks left. Like I don't think you don't think of us new small

amusement parks starting. Maybe I'm no, but no, I, I mean, listen. I'm. I'm, I mean, listen. closing. Yeah, it feels like it's like an older thing, definitely. I mean, I'm trying to think we have Playland here. Oh, we'll read some reviews of Playland. A dump. Oh, I always had a good time there. I haven't been there in a while.

But yeah, the, the, the, um, I, there's not a new, like, I haven't, I haven't read about a new one, a new one in the area or in Canada or whatever in a long time. I mean, I haven't heard of a new one opening. that doesn't mean that a new one will never open. But it is like an under, it is like I can't think of a harder undertaking. Like I can't think of like obviously there are things that are hard to do. I can't imagine that this is like even possible for a guy who's never worked in the industry that doesn't have any money.

Like that he's going to go to investors. He goes, sorry, might have worded it a bit wrong. I meant the company. need to be funded, which shouldn't be that much. I'm currently in talks with them, so I'll get a price soon. The construction will be another thing that'll be sorted out way later in the project. There's a multi-billion pound that's a bridge-crack. There's a multi-billion pound company that's interested in helping with finance with the park. You're talking about a bank that wants to give him the craziest predatory loan you've ever seen your entire life. He's talking about going to a bank

and hitting the contact us button. For some reason, For some reason, Now that I found out that this guy's British, I kind of believe he might be able to do it. Honestly, I do know what you mean.

I'm like, well, there's a certain ingenuity. Yeah, and there's something about the like whimsy of the British. I feel like this could actually, this could actually work out. This guy goes, is this Universal UK?

If so, I'm in. No, you'd have to get the IP for Universal Studios. Well, how expensive could IP be for universal. I mean, this guy goes, not even close. Dude, it's probably a scammer wants to open a park but has no money. It's the second thing. I mean, the scam would be astoundingly bad. It's not even a good scam. You where would you even get the money? I don't think this is a scammer. This is a guy who, yeah, loves roller coasters and wants to create the ultimate fucking amuse well, he does say, first of all, I'm not a scammer. I don't even need you guys to spend money if you join up. Damn. I was asking,

as I believe it would be an amazing opportunity for you guys. The whole, reason I was asking you guys if you wanted to do it was so you could help in the planning stages and it would be awesome to have your input into the design of the park. And secondly, we're working with companies and investors to become financially stable, which is heading in the right direction, already raising plenty of money. He's not. Gotcha. We don't know that. He just says update. The company has been paid for moving on to the next stage. There you go. Straight from the horse's mouth, you guys, hey, you guys, you guys, uh, maybe have some of a apologies to make you. I mean, he's, I guess, I guess it's there, it's coming. He's coming soon.

It's like, oh, we haven't heard about, again, we don't read about UK amusement parks. So we have no, can you got to go Brian to this guy's pay. You know what I mean. Okay. He stopped posting. Like, he posts a, oh, he's busy. He's busy to be on. Yeah. He's too busy to be on line. Why would he be hosting? He's literally out there hammer and nail putting together some of the sickest rides you've ever seen. He can't be online all day. I wish Universal would add an adult swim park to their to their park. Rick and Morty and Aqua team would be awesome. Oh, yes. Rick and Morty the ride. That's that's what I'm talking about. I kind of love Rick and Morty. It's better than ever. They've actually approved it a lot. It's actually, it's actually, it's actually, way better. Yeah.

Yeah. Pickle. You guys heard of Pickle Rick. I have. I'm hoping he comes back. I used to have a pickle wick shirt. That's cool. That's cool, man. Thank you. This guy goes, Tim and Eric ride sounds fun and horrifying at the same time. Or what about the Eric Andre ranch dressing log flume?

Oh, yeah. Hell, nah. That's too crazy, bro. You're in a long flu and you're going through ranch dressing. I don't like that at all. Buddy, I'm literally dying from laughter, but also I am a little bit considering the smell of that. Rants and dairy.

product. It's 90 degrees outside every day. It's disgusting, man. This guy goes, you'd never see that happen as Comcast owns Universal and AT&T owns adult swim. Comcast and AT&T are rivals. AT&T Turner to Turner Broadcast Systems Cartoon Network adult swim. This guy will not fantasize. Well, no, but he's right, though. He is bringing up a pretty important point that this person's like, I'd love to see this. It's like, well, that won't happen because it's not a part of Universal Studios. That's kind of an important detail. This guy goes, don't.

The guy, and then another guy comes back. He goes, Disney would be the only option as AT&T has a long partnership with the Disney company. Just need Eisner and his kid to come back asking to make Disney less boring for teens. I'm asking Bob Eisner to put in a brick and Morty right at Disney World. And he's saying, yes, sir, right away. Yes, please. And then listen, I love Tim and Eric. I grew up on it and love it.

We had Tim on the show. We love that. But it does feel like that's a bit odd to do it. Tim and Eric ride now. They haven't done the show in some time. Right. Yeah. It doesn't feel like that would be the most popular ride nowadays.

So maybe, maybe, I mean, no, because it's, Muson Park still are for children, aren't they? I think so. I mean, actually, I would push back on that in that like, like Cedar. point has like insane roller coasters that little children are not getting on. Oh yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You know what I mean? Like these places with these giga coasters, these huge like not universal they're like at least teens, I guess. Yeah. Universal Studios is for, listen, I love it. I've mentioned many times. I have so much fun. Whenever I go to LA, I go to Universal Studios. I love the rides.

It's great time. But it is a lot of it is still geared towards children, I feel like. But I guess I guess possibly like our generation, we would go pretty crazy for a Tim and Eric ride, probably. Well, this guy goes, I live in Orlando and I have to say, Galaxy's Edge is the best theme park experience I've ever had. Rise of the Resistance is like no other theme park attraction I've ever been on. If by some miracle Disney did decide to make a fifth park for the adult crowd, what the Imagineers could do with Rick and Morty would be endless. Buddy, the Star Wars parks already for the adults going to Disney every day. I don't know what are you talking about.

I don't know if you've been to the park, man. It sounds like you have a lot of the people there are adults. I think that they are getting confused by the adult swim. Thinking that adult swim is, you know, it has adult in the name. So this is like the adult. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I mean, oh God, the Imagineers fucking getting a hold of pickle, Rick. I mean, give me a, Ray.

It is funny to see guys who think adult swim isn't also for teenagers. Yeah. Yeah, man. No, it's not like 45-year-old guys watching that. Like, I don't know. This guy, and he replies and goes, considering how crummy the Aquitaine show was animated, they could just put in some of those creepy old tiny animatronics.

Live up to the show. And a Rick and Morty ride, you're not lying. It would be great. We'd all get riggedy wrecked. That's from the show, I assume. I assume it must be from the show. But what would the Rick and Morty ride be? I guess whatever.

Like, they figure something out. I don't know. I've never seen Rick and Morty. I mean, I think I've seen it early on. Sure. I watched a little bit of the first season of it. Never the never. Never.

I don't think I finished the first season even, but I'm just trying to think of, I guess probably there's some stuff that like the fans would note right. Like there'd be some shit that would lend itself to a ride. I assume. Pickle Rick, of course would be, you know, you'd be, he would be have to be heavily involved. Heavily featured. Yeah. Heavily featured.

But, but I guess there probably is some stuff that they could do. But it's just they seem to be like. like, oh, this is a fucking million dollar idea. Like, this is a home run. This is a home run 100%. Pickle Rick Park. One of the worst theme parks you've ever been to. This can be tacky, dated, or just plain bad.

So I guess the Holy Land Experience in Orlando Flores, one of worst theme parks I've ever been to. There's a few issues I had with it. It's just not fun to be at. As someone who grew up Catholic and decided Christianity wasn't for me, this sounded like could be cool and enlightening. I was interested in seeing the stories of the Bible, brought to life in a fun and interesting way. Watching Jesus get beat and crucified twice a day while interesting is not fun.

It's actually kind of sad. Wait a minute. The stage show at the Christian Abusement Park is the crucifixion of Christ. Well, they do it twice a day. Twice a day. That's crazy. That is crazy. There's a lot of stories that are like exciting.

Like I don't want to like gas them up. Like that's not the first one I would go to. Maybe Noah, maybe the famous. Noah's Ark. Hey, David and Goliath, kind of an action story, you know? I'm going to go for it. Let's watch this guy get beaten to death

in front of my lives to do the audience. Maybe do something with the Odyssey, perhaps. Or Jonah and the whale. That's a joke. That's a self-deprecating joke, Luke. Self-deprecating joke I was making there about myself. So it's fine. I'm learning to own this type of stuff.

Yeah. You're like fucked up or something? Yeah, I fucked up big. He said it's a Bible story. I embarrassed myself pretty heavily. I received a lot of blacklash online. You said the honesty was a Bible story. Correct.

Yeah, well, they're both made up. See, that's how you should have. That's the kind of, I tried. It was, it was nothing worked. I tried everything. I tried every single angle to try to, you know, let it roll off my back and failed.

It haunted me for weeks and weeks. It was like, it's, you know, it was a lot of people, holy shit, I didn't know Chris was so dumb. It was, it was true. really a horrifying episode of my life. Let's all add that there are no rides, really.

There's a put-put golf course and a bunch of places designed to look like they're from areas around Jerusalem. So there's no rides at the... Well, yeah, this sounds like... It's interesting because I'm like, I don't know if I'd call that even a theme park then. It seems just like a... Well, it's a park with a theme.

Yeah, sure. Okay, okay. It's heavily theme. All right. It's heavily. You're right. Sorry, sorry. I retract that from the record.

I would imagine the put-putt is obviously themed as well, right? But they didn't, they mentioned a put-put. I mean, this is a real sad sounding. You got Jesus getting beat and crucified on stage while you're playing putt-putt. You can hear his screams from some of the holes. Now, I think I watched a thing about this place. And the crucifixion thing, they have Jesus carry the cross across the park. So you can sort of follow him.

You can't even escape it. You're trying to get away from it. He follows you over to another area. Yeah, he has to carry the cross. Jesus in the park going, no, sorry, man, I don't got nothing on me. He goes, it looks tacky and dated. They keep things renovated, so nothing looks broken. It's just dated looking, though.

Looks like a lot of the stuff was built when their original 20,000 leagues under the sea would have been a high-tech ride for as big of an experience as it touts itself to be. I guess my expectations were higher. Three. I thought it was going to be like medieval times. Hmm. But instead of nights, you see a man get his feet and hands nailed to a horse. Yeah, it's like it doesn't seem fair.

Like at medieval times they did jousting where each of them had a weapon. It would have been nice to just see Jesus. Somebody give Jesus a weapon. He gets a spear of lodgingness as well. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

I got in on a free ticket with some friends. They were already going and were staunch. atheists and they knew I probably wouldn't go on my own accord. Don't go to that, idiot. Shut up. Oh, me and my atheist friends are going to the Holy Land experience to make fun of it. Shut the fuck up. Yeah.

That's like going full of Jervais. I can imagine Jervais showing up there and just being like, oh my God. This is absolutely ridiculous. Absolutely ridiculous. It's like when they opened up that Noah's Ark experience and every single single podcast went there and was like, it was fucking crazy in there. Like every comedy comedy comedians

podcast. He goes, I probably wouldn't go on my own accord. They both bought me a ticket and told me they were going now. I hadn't looked anything up or done any research because this was supposed to be a side thing on our trip to Disney. I actually hadn't even expected it to take up a full day until I noticed that they slapped it on one of the last days we were in Orlando on the itinerary.

We had made in Google Sheets. It wasn't medieval times at all. There were no delicious turkey legs or jousting. I was expecting chariot races or something cool. Maybe even a Jesus themed dark ride. Nope. Just Jesus getting crucified twice a day to cheesy musical numbers and some weird museum-like areas with replicas of holy relics.

Also out as a bonus, oh, then he goes into something. Well, he goes also out as a bonus to Dinosaur Adventureland in Pensacola. It's also particularly bad. I think it might have closed. They were doing a fundraiser last I heard, open a park and out. Alabama instead. It's Christian Evangelist dinosaur theme park. Sounds awesome, right? Well, it turns out the whole park is actually trying to disprove evolution. Yeah, no shit. What do you mean? What did you think it was? What did you think that they're yeah, man, you figured it out. Yeah. So this guy goes,

uh, uh, so I love this. This is great. This guy goes Jesus themed dark ride. What would that even be? And a guy replies and goes, stuck in a cave for three days. days. So we're, we're, we're, we're, we're captivating nature of the power of, of the riff. We got the captivating nature of the power of the rift. Yeah, yeah. We're going to maybe meet the captivating nature of the power of the rift. This guy goes, stuck in a cave for three days. And then, unfortunately, we have a grim riffer. So joking aside. That's the mark of a grim rift or somebody who's going to kill the riff. Putting the joke aside all putting the joke aside for a moment. And it's like, okay, everybody pack up your stuff.

We're heading home. No, right to gold for you, sir. They only let us have two riff posts. And then they come in and he's like, I was thinking something like it's a small world or living with the land. You ride through story sets where it either tells the overall story of Jesus's life or tells a specific story. It doesn't need to be anything particularly exciting. I ride living with the land every time I go to Epcot pretty much. And that ride's honestly interesting, but incredibly boring.

weird thing to say. I do this every other. I'm a very boring ride. He goes, perhaps even a spooky revelation space ride would be cool. I think that might be a cool. Okay, honestly,

if they, if any of these evangelical cowards had the huts, but to do a dark ride that's like all the crazy shit revelations, I would go on that. That's cool. Yeah. Like a Revelations haunted house type situation. Yeah,

yeah. It's like, there's like guys, so like goat men with like huge like St. Elmo's fires around them and it's like really scary. That would be. They would never do that. Like they would never do that at this type of place because it's like...

They want you to like the stuff. They want you to like it. Yeah. Yeah. Don't they do that at like churches they do these hell mites where around Halloween where you go and they try to show you what it's like to go to hell. It's like a haunted house. I mean, they used to do it on Saturday Night Live back in the early 2000s. They had, um, Jim Brewer was playing, playing the goat man.

Now they, you know. Now the Ditch you told you. Did you remember the goat boy, Luke? Uh-uh. Oh, God. Holy shit, holy shit, man. Get out of the house every now. Sorry, man.

You never heard of the goat boy, the famous Jim Brewer character, goat boy. It made, it made his career. Go look it up. Go watch some goat boy sketches. Oh, you'll love it. That's your homework. That's your guy's homework for this week, Luke, is go watch every single goat boy sketch. Awesome.

I'll tell you what. Careful how, careful about taking a sip of a pop. Because you know what I mean? It'll be spitting it out with laughter at some points of that, no doubt. It's review time. First review we got us for Cedar Point. I've been to when I was young. I'd love,

I've always wanted to go. America's roller coast. Yeah. That's what they call Ohio. This is a famous one like in America. It's famous. Is there a movie about it? Was there a movie about it?

Am I crazy? I just feel like anyone who's like a coaster head in my life that I've ever talked to is like, yeah, that's the best one. They're like obsessed with it. Yeah. It's, it is the big roller coaster park. Oh,

no, I was thinking of Cedar Rapids with, uh, Ed Hell. Oh. Cool. You guys, this guy gave a one star.

This guy had a hell time. Just spent two days one night at the breakers hotel to say the least for the price I'd expect better from the hotel and inside the park. Way too many rides not being open all at all on some of the hottest days of the year. And one of the most rides in the park kept having issues, causing what was supposed to be a 45-minute wait, turning into over two hours. And making it worse once it got back up and running, does the staff push through the people that have been in line for over two hours? Nope. Sure don't.

They continue to let fast pass people get on the ride. Yeah, buddy. You ever been to a amusement park in the last like 40 years? We hate fast pass. You hate fast. It's the reality of it. But yeah, it's like, I hate the idea of that. that it's just like, hey, you have more money.

So now you can just, the fast pass people who are abusing it and riding over and over and over again while the regular people just have to sit there in line, you know, like that sucks. I'm starting to think that it might not be worth it to get fast pass anymore because everybody's buying. Sometimes I've been to a park. Like I think I went to Disney in the last few years and it was like sometimes fast pass would be longer. It's a little bit like TSA pre-check where you're like, well, if everyone has it, then you should just do the normal one. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I never even thought of that. If so many, the fast pass line becomes longer than the regular one. If it's like, yeah, yeah, yeah, that's my dream. That's my dream. I mean, that's, I agree with you. It sucks. But I also am like, literally, if I'm going to go to an amusement park, I'm going to get it because I'm like, I'm already spending fucking, especially like Disney or something where you're like, okay, I'm spending $300, $350. They're basically the same. And one of them means that I don't have to. sit in the hot sun as much on day. I understand it. I hate it as a concept. I think I talked about it on the roller coaster episode that like I don't begrudge people who use it. I just hate the whole

system set up that way. And the people I really hate are the fast past people, which I'm sure you weren't doing this who are just riding the ride over and over and over again while everybody waits in line. You just do one. You get one. Yeah. Yeah. Well, he goes, come back later, you know. He goes then comes to the water park just way too long of waiting times. Listen, all these reviews are going to talk about long wait time. That's the whole thing. That is amazing. Yeah. It's also like a little bit I'm like, I understand the frustration of the brides breaking down, but I'm like, but there it's like that's like part of it. Like they have to like that's like

what they don't do that. Dude, there's a roller coaster at a magic mountain out here that keeps putting people into medical comas. It's like this roller coaster. I don't know if you guys saw this news, but it's like it literally like it's the and they like if it stops too short you just go into a coma because of brain damage and they still haven't shut it down. I see a lot of. I see a lot of people saying I blacked out on a ride. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. That is too much. I would not. Yeah. So because of the nightmare in the main park as well as the water park said what the heck, I'll go into Lake Erie. Gross. Like that is like what do you mean?

Is that like actually going to the lake. Lake Erie. It's one of the great lakes, but it's one of the grossest ones. Yeah, I would not swim in Lake Erie. I would not get in Lake Erie is the one of the great lakes. I would not get in. Yeah, that's crazy.

And he goes, for the first time. Would you, would you swim in Lake America? Yeah. That's one of the great lakes. I don't think I'd swim in any of the law. I don't swim.

Is it like Michigan? The chick of that one's fine. I mean, people swim in it. Yeah, he goes, I said, what the heck,

I'll go into Lake Erie for the first time my 46 years. And yet again, The water felt amazing, but the breakers beach was such disgusting trash everywhere on the sand. People leaving things behind on the beach and they never get picked up or turned in somewhere. I literally left something on the beach to see if it was ever taken care of by Steph. If you're wondering, the answer is no. Making more trash on purpose is so amazing. Making more trash to test the trash system out and see just how bad it is.

bro what so hey guys if you're wondering the answers no was still there when i left the park at closing tonight and to make things worse the last thing anyone wants to smell are dead fish and they were literally everywhere even a dead seagull right on the water's edge out front of the hotel i'm saying this guy deserved everything because he did litter he went there and yeah i thought for sure he was going to say he picked it up but he literally said it was still there when he left like he did just leave the litter there as part of some experiment he was doing. Yeah. This is a place called Eilich Gardens theme park. It is widely considered the worst theme park in the United States. It's in Denver, Colorado. It's got three stars. And I'll tell you this, theme parks have a

high star. Yeah, of course. Because you go there, even if it's kind of annoying, you get a I'm actually kind of surprised by that. Like, I feel like if you looked up Disney World, I guess what people are just like generally happy. Yeah, they have. And I think most people understand Luke the lines thing. Right, right, right. And like, I know at Universal Studio,

they do a really good job with the lines where you're constantly moving. They're so, you're going to different areas and constantly moving. I do love that. Universal and Disney have that over like all the traditional parks. Like they recognize our big issue is lines and how do we deal with that. And they do a decent job with that, I will say.

So I think that just most people, understand that's part of it. And as long as they get to ride the rides, they usually have a good time, I think. Yeah. When you're in LA again, we got, you know, they added a fast and furious, full roller coaster. I just saw that. I just saw that. I'm excited. I'm excited about that too. Because they had the fast and furious ride thing where you would go when you went on the little thing. On the studio tour, they had the ones. It wasn't really a ride, but it was just like the video screens on either side. But yeah, I think that would be a lot of fun. I am not returning to the United States unfortunately.

Well, maybe it was some big things change. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, but yeah, in theory, listen, you let me know how fun it is. I would love to hear about it for sure. This guy goes, nice theme in Waterpark. My review is largely influenced by nostalgia as I was here back in 1996. However, paying $630 for a party of five people is, in my view, not worth it, which is, that is for a theme park that's kind of reasonable.

I mean, nowadays, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's modern times, you're saying. So, yeah, I don't, yeah, I feel like gets around a hundred bucks a person. I'm like, that's what a theme, in my head, that's how much it costs. I'm like, oh, maybe it's like 70 if it's an off day, but I'm like, yeah, it's a hundred bucks to go. A hundred something dollars for sure. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And he goes, uh, moreover, they charged me four times on my credit card and I had to deal with them and my bank. The park has night, really nice rides.

The water park was very refreshing. prices inside are insane. Oh my God, yeah. That's another thing. It's the same as stadiums as they got you inside. Yeah, I don't. And again, also like I feel maybe that goes to the high reviews. I'm like, yeah, if I'm going to the Dodgers game, I'm spending $19 on a beer.

Like, I know that. Yeah, you know going on. Yeah. Wait, wait, is he talking about this horrible one in Denver that everyone hates though? Yeah. Okay. Okay. He goes, fries are $14.

$0.50. A bottle of water. is $6. A locker is $25. We have the money, but I'm not going to support this. Okay. So he gives a shit. I'm glad to hear you doing all right. Yeah. Shut up. Cool. He's like bragging in his fucking bad with you. Yeah. Don't worry about that. I'm complaining about the price. I don't want you to think I'm poor. Yeah. He goes, don't get to skip the line wristband. It's almost double $75. The original ticket on top. People were cussing at us all the time as we

move to the front. Very unpleasant experience. Other than that, we're happy to spend a day there. What do you mean? Oh, they're using the fast pass and people are cussing them out. People are cussing them out for the really funny. Honestly, I like that behavior. You see people using fast pass to help to go fuck themselves. Yeah, fast pass shaming is that's a smart thing, right? And then you get people, then the next time they come, they won't use the fast pass. So then you're getting rid of all the fast pass. That's almost like, that's almost like society healing itself. You know, This guy, this guy right here, he went there and he goes, don't waste your money here. I posted receipts, but long story short, my partner and I, avid theme park goers and lovers.

By the way, you're about this is, I'll just say it right now. The theme park reviews have the highest density of Mr. Cheapy refunds that I'm almost ashamed to call you, Mr. Cheapy refund now. You think I don't even, you think I'm not even at these. You could get one. Number one, I don't think you could think because they don't ever get them. You can only get one if something like really bad happens to you or a party or someone in your party. Yeah. Someone's got to get killed. What are they looking for a refund?

Well, here we go. Okay, let's hear. I posted, but long story short, my partner and I, avid theme park goers and lovers drove 13 out. I like, by the way, I like the idea that they're avid theme park goers and then the separate thing is they're also lovers. Like, I just want to be clear. We are in a sexual relationship. Yeah. Yeah, it's not a weird sort of platonic.

No, we're sexually. No, we're going to fuck. We might even fuck at the park. We don't know. I might finger my wife on a roller coaster. Who knows? Yeah. He drove 13 hours round trip from Albuquerque, New Mexico.

It spent $700 on season passes and rapid ride passes, along with the $1,000 in hotel cost and about $300 in fuel. Why did he buy season passes if he lives a 13-hour drive away? I cannot figure that out. Planning on going back? No clue. I don't think so far away. 13 hour round trip is like out of state, right?

Right. You're driving like a full day to go to a place you have a season pass for. I like that. Yeah. It's six and a half hour drive, which isn't like the longest drive in the world, but it's not generally six hours is my cutoff. I would not do a season.

The only season pass I've ever done is at Universal because I live 15 minutes away from it. And I still used it twice. Like I have a, I have the aquarium season pass, but that's because it's like once you go twice, it's worth it. Exactly. Yeah. So, so I wonder if that's the case where they figure they'll go twice and the season pass is not that much more expensive than the one time. Yeah. Probably what it was. It goes a thousand and you know they're at you know you're gearing up to get a refund when you start talking about how much everything costs. And you're talking about the fuel costs. You're giving it. You're giving them, you're like your fucking bucky's receipt.

at the customer service. Look at this. None of this included food. We specifically went to Denver to visit Illich Gardens because we've never been before. From the second we stepped on site, Illich Gardens failed in customer service the entire

time we were there. First, our passes cannot be found in the system. Then when they were, we were sent to get our rapid ride pass band. At that station, we were told we'd have to upgrade to platinum passes in order to receive them. It's very funny. Very funny. I love that. These places are such a rip-off, by the way. Like,

you know, one of the other things I learned is that the fast passes have levels. Yes. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. There's always a higher level. There's always an upgrade. And you basically, you can't get the lowest or your dirt and you don't get to ride any rides. You can get the second one that makes you kind of a regular park goer. And then there's still five more ahead that allow you to actually ride the rides. Yeah. Yeah, the diamond platinum one is the one that you're trying to do you can i i was really i've said it before i didn't get a fast pass or anything for universal studios and i just went i used that like calendar thing where it shows when it's when it's not and we went at a time like right when it opened on a midday like just after school got in and that was just like

it was we were able to do it i actually i actually saw a really good hack for that what is it but you do have to say you're a single guy but like i don't think it's worth it Oh, do the single riders long? Unless you're about to tell me I save $45,000. I don't think I'm going to be telling people I'm a single guy. Unless I could tell the ride operator that I do have a girlfriend and I'm in a committed relationship, I will not be telling them I'm a single rider. Not a chance.

Not a chance. Single rider line is supposedly pretty, you get through pretty fast. And if you're a couple and you do the single rider line, most of the time you'll be on the same. But that's the only drawback. Yeah, I've done that because it's like. Sometimes you're like, it literally is like, do you want to wait five minutes or two and a half hours? And I'm like, I don't, I don't care. I get it when you have kids, but it's like I don't need to sit next to her for this two-minute cars ride.

It's okay. That's the thing. You might not be on the same train, but like, who cares? You'll go and then you'll be out of the exit. She'll be out in a second. You know what I mean? The single rider's thing with a car is a pretty good idea, honestly. Yeah.

You still got to say, they should make you say I'm a single guy. I'm a single guy. Put a hat on. It says single guy. That's what they would do if it was. No love. No love. I don't have love.

Nobody loves it. His life. After several minutes of argument with the attendant. I just was thinking of families. You're wearing the single guy hat and the families are like pulling their kids away from you as you walk by. So you go up to the mom, you're like, so, no husband? or... Honey, honey, calling on his cell phone.

No, he's here, I promise. I promise. After several minutes of argument with the attendant, we made our way to the locker's area. At the venue kiosk, my card was charged $30 for a locker. However, a locker was not assigned. We were sent to find a venue employee to request a refund.

That was not where we were told they would be. We eventually made our way to guest relations and requested a refund. The attendant there told us that we would need to email Eilich Gardens to request. the refund. My email and their response is attached below. I've now had to contact my credit union to issue the credit back because Eelich Gardens has the worst customer service I've ever for $30 or for the whole thing? For the whole thing. He wants the whole thing. So he left. He decided

he didn't want to go anymore. Is that why? They drove six and a half hours and then didn't even go to the fucking park. Because the locker situation was upsetting or is it because they had to upgrade to the next? Yeah. And do you know, you do know like that locker situation. Yeah, I mean, I'm sure it's crazy I imagine this guy's kid though and you've been in the car for six and a half hours and then your cheap ass dad who's like we can afford it, but we're not going in here I don't think he had they have kids. I don't think they have they have they do think that they spent the day there in the end, but they just like everything sucked for him. Also I do I do feel like it's crazy that like to so you bought a season past like without doing any research?

Like I feel like this has to be a place that if you Google it, a million things are going to come up about how it sucks ass, right? Yeah, of course. Yeah. Yeah. Like, that's so crazy. And why? I don't even understand. So they're saying in order to get the fast pass, you have to upgrade to another level is what they're saying.

So they're just like, we're unwilling to not go fast pass. And we weren't, okay. I'm just not exactly understanding what they're frustrated about. He tells him the whole situation. He goes, I was asked to email the attached photos that are reason for requesting a refund. A couple of days ago, I purchased gold season passes for my partner and I to use at Eilich Gardens on a vacation. We specifically plan to visit Eelich Gardens. I also purchased the season rapid ride passes for us.

The total came out to $677.97.98. I was unsure we'd be able to make it back up here from Albuquerque by the end of the season. We ultimately decided to spend the money as we are avid theme park lovers and goers. Today was very unfortunate, however. we encountered problem after problem from the minute we stepped in. He explains the stuff he says in a review. He goes, today was incredibly disappointing.

A 13-hour round trip, four nights in a hotel in Denver. We're exhausted on a trip solely to make it to Eelich Gardens and to enjoy the park. Not only does that not happen, we are confident we will not be returning. And we are hoping that Eich Gardens do the right thing and issue a refund for gold passes in a season pass ride. Now, Chris. So they did stay. Yes. But they just are saying because we got the season pass and we're not going to return because of the bad experience we had, we would like our money back for it.

Yes. I don't think that. Well, the answer, I do have the email. You used it, man. Exactly. Mr. Cheapy refund thwarting. Here it comes. Yep.

Thanks for reaching out to Eulich Gardens. First off, we would like to apologize for your experience with our employees and overall park was poor. We take our customer service very seriously and we'll share this with our operations team. to address internally. Oh, that's the worst thing of Mr. Cheapley Reflank can hear. We're going to share this internally in order to like that. They're not going to,

but it is really funny to imagine the team meeting of all the disaffected 17-year-olds doing the right operators. And some fucking 30-year-old manager is just reading this email out. Yeah. Like, they're on their phones. I just love the, like the pain that he must be feeling right now

as they're saying like, we're going to try to use this as a teachable moment to move forward in the future. And he's like, no. That's not the answer I wanted. That's not what I want. Because unfortunately, we're unable to offer a refund at this time as the season passes and rapid ride pass can be used through January 3rd. With events like Fright Fest and Eelich holidays, there's plenty of time to still enjoy the park.

You don't need to put an ad in there. You got a rubbing salt in the woods. a little bit. That is scary for a cheap Mr. G. Mr. Cheapy refund running

into a fucking dark closet right now. Just fucking full fetal position. Reading my email is like a haunted house. This is, this is not gone well. I mean, I don't know why you would think

that you would get a refund after you used it already. And it's a, yeah. I'm going to tell you something. Both Canada and America, I found guys asking for refunds that literally said, this isn't the way America is supposed to work. It's pretty much exactly how it works.

Literally, if there's one thing I know is that the customer experience is going to be exactly like how you described it. I wanted to get this other refund guy in here for Playland in Vancouver. Listen, this is just a cheapie refund right in my very city or my neck of the house. We're going to be disappointed. Oh, man. Again, fun, but parking costs more than the ticket. Okay, so the ticket's very cheap.

That's actually like a good son. Yeah, that's usually a good sign. The parking's not going to be $200. That means it's like really a good deal. Yeah, I mean, I think Playland isn't that expensive. It's, I think it is, you know, it's not crazy expensive. My family had a great day at Playland. Okay.

My son loved the beach. and that part of our trip was excellent yeah the beast is great unfortunately our visit ended up on a disappointing note i accidentally forgot to pay for parking in the easy park lot across from playland i fully accepted responsibility and asked easy park if they would just reduce the 82 dollar violation since i was willing to pay for the parking fee and it was an honest first time that's not the way that works i know listen parking these people are predatory and it sucks but no it's like the one people you can't fuck with. You can I just, can I just clarify something?

We've dealt with Easy Park many times. They're like a huge chain around here. They have no affiliation to playland. That's what I was wondering. So he parked in a private lot not affiliated with the parking. It's not leaving a bad review of the park. Completely have no affiliation to it whatsoever. Yeah.

It had fun at the park. Right. That's so much fun. The kid loved the beast. They had a great day out. But this other company fucked me over. and it was near your park. And I say, because we have the same,

we have like a parking company that runs all the parking here. Yeah. The people that work for that place, I mean, I'm sure the very nice people in their regular life, but fully are never given you a refund.

Never. There's some of the worst. It's some of the worst companies you'll ever deal with are parking garages and parking companies. They are absolutely horrible. Yeah.

You are not getting your hands on any of that. No, not a joke. And everyone knows that. And of course, again, it's another situation where, yeah, everyone, you know this going in. Yeah. That like, hey, I, I fucked up. Hey, I'm willing to admit that I fucked up. You know what I mean?

Like, it's like saying to a police officer like, I, listen, I fucked up. I drove too fast. You know, like, I'm willing to, I'm willing to like, you know, like, I guess there's no actual equivalent because you can't pay the actual amount. But it's like you've broken a rule that there's this consequence that's posted. and they know it sucks. It's late, you know, like it's sucks. It sucks.

It sucks. It sucks. It sucks. It sucks. But you can't just say like, hey, I'm willing to pay the parking now. Like, that's, everyone knows that's never going to work, you know? Yeah. Like you, you put a meter run out and then you go, okay, well, now I'll put money in the meter

if you're going to ticket me. If you're going to ticket me, it's not how it works. It's like, yeah. It's like, yeah. It's like the worst company ever is going to be like, yeah, no, we'll take the lower amount of money instead of the. the higher amount that we're actually legally allowed to take. We'll take the lower amount.

That's fine. The company with an 80 year contract. Yeah. With the city, they never have to worry about ever going out of business. I contacted the P&E, hoping they could help or encourage some flexibility. They explain that parking enforcement is entirely handled by Easy Park and they couldn't

intervene. Yes, of course. Totally. Yeah. Of course. It's like, yeah, they're completely set for companies.

They have nothing. They could call them just like you can call them. in the exact same way. So it's really bad at you. Yeah, the PNE, I think I mentioned it before. The PNE is what runs played on the Pacific National Exhibition. So it's the same thing. Yeah.

Well, I understand that the parking experience still affected. While I understand that, this guy hate, here's what I don't like about this guy. Look, I get it. But he doesn't get it. He very clearly doesn't get the situation that he's in. You know what I mean? Like at all. I, listen, I see this a lot.

when I'm like out walking around in town when there's a concert at the arena or like a big thing where people are coming into town for stuff, they are utterly flabbergasted by parking. They have the hardest time figuring out parking. Parking sucks. Parking sucks. I mean, Luke, you know that. I mean, Luke lives in Los Angeles. I mean, parking sucks. I get it when you're like, especially if you don't live in a city and then you go to park in a city, it is very. I mean, I get, I literally got a ticket because a sign was covered by half a bush and I just didn't see it trying to fight it because I was like, well, maybe I have a case. Obviously they didn't care.

And I had to pay up. A bunch of my mistake that I'm always learning. But yeah, no. I mean, it's just like, that's part of it. Yeah. I don't it's I think that that is the, you know, when when DBJ moved to LA, he parked on my street the wrong way. Like he was on the right side of the street, but his car was facing the wrong direction. He was like, why did I get a ticket for that?

I was like, because you're not. in like bumble, like, to me, but it's one of those things where I'm like, I understand why, like that's so insane to me because I've always lived in a city. I would never do that. But I get why if you didn't, you would be like, what is the problem here? You know what I'm saying? Nothing's, nothing's affected by this. But it's all it is, it's these companies are, right, have all the different ways that they can to make more money. Yeah. And in the big cities, they're utilizing them all the time. But in this case, this guy just fucking didn't pay for He just walked away.

He just didn't pay for parking. I will say this. I will say this that like there is a, but he's, this guy. He lives here. So he knows, right? This isn't somebody who's like from like out of the area. But maybe he is. He's from Washington.

He's from Washington. Yeah. Okay. So that no, hang on then. I will say that there is like this really confusing thing with parking where you have to actually download an app and it doesn't seem like you should or whatever. That's everywhere though, bro. That's every city has that now.

Yeah. And it just feels like. You know if you've paid or not. I know. Regardless. You know at the end of the day if you've paid. At what point was you, were you planning on paying is the question.

Were you thinking that you park and then pay afterwards? That's not how it works a lot of time. And he's not even saying that. He's just, I think the way he admits to it, I think he's just like, I fucked up. I didn't pay.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I forgot. He's like, because he's complaining. You know what I mean? Like he isn't actually admitting like Brian said. But he recognizes that he didn't.

I don't even think he's trying to say, oh, I thought I was going to pay later or anything. I think he's just saying, I forgot to pay. I love his line. This Mr. Cheapy refund, this is the Mr. Cheapy refund that uses the little bit of sugar. He goes, I hope the P&E works with Easy Park to develop a more customer-friendly policy for honest first-time mistakes. They're not going to. You can read that again, but they're not going to.

They're not going to. They're not friends, man. You know that, right? They don't fuck with each other like that. I love that. I love, absolutely love the line to develop a more customer-friendly policy for honest first-time mistakes. Yeah, an honest, listen. I make some honest mistakes every round then, and it would be nice.

It'd be nice. Hey, you make one mistake about what is in the Bible and what isn't in the Bible. It'd be nice if people gave you a little bit of leeway and they didn't keep bringing it up over and over again. So I do kind of understand them on that one. So I want to read a last thing because it changed my life to read it. I've made a, this is a review from Six Flags Great America, California's Great America. And I want to apologize to the people at the UDF for accusing them of hiding my ice cream sandwiches. Because I read a review that showed me what I sounded like.

Okay. Is there any review that shows you what you sounded like when you sent the email to them saying, please tell me you're going to make more rights. No reply. Brian, what's UDF? What's UDF?

What's UDF just for? It's a gas station. It's a gas station that sells these ice cream sandwiches, this particular brand that Brian talked about on the podcast all the time. So I think more people started trying them because Brian said, you know? Maybe you just created a shortage with the gas station.

Because they're a small company who doesn't make that many, right? So I think that like it was enough. It's not like our podcast. is super big, but it's enough that, like, people in the area maybe bought more and then people order them online a little bit. But then Brian, he sent a thing. This is, again, a month ago on the bonus episode

or maybe longer when we were talking about this. But Brian sent an email to them saying, when they were sold out saying, please, with P-L-L-L-L-E-A-A-S-S-E, like a long, please tell me you're making more of these ice cream sandwiches. just the most pointless email in the world. The idea that they're like, oh, these product that's sold out, I guess people do want this, you know, like that he's helping it anyway. I don't know what he's hoping to get out of it.

We weren't going to make more. Yeah. I just want, I want to know it's happening. All they had to do is just answer the email and say, we're making more. We're on it. But that's what I'm saying, if you said it in a different way, if he sent an email saying, hey, when are these, do you know when these will be back in stock? Like, do you have any idea when they'll be?

back in stock. That that's like maybe you'd get an answer from this, but some fucking guy being like, please. Maybe they thought he was a kid. I actually get that tactic. They're like, well, only a kid would write this. We have to be nice to a kid. Yeah. They did. Yeah. I'm excited to hear this, this, uh, review that made Brian look at himself in the mirror. It did. If your park isn't closed and you just made fresh product to sell and tell customers to come back at a certain time and then refused to sell the product that is freshly made, then what's the point of making it? What?

For your employees to take it home? Oh. So what are they saying? What are they saying? It's written horribly, but they do explain it. Okay. He goes, you have to wonder why they closed right after new product was made and they refused to sell it considering it was showcased in the window.

I'm referring to Antianne. Several employees were there and witnessed, And witnessed, I was told with other customers to come back. Another lady was told the same. And they laughed at her when she went to purchase items. That's funny. Okay, that is funny. Exactly.

And he has a point, be like, you can't get any pretzels or stupid. Are you kidding? What do you think this is? Dumb fuck. Buddy, we're clocked out. We're clocked out. This is the same energy, though, as like, I'm wondering why those 17-year-old ride operator doesn't kick people out of light.

It's like, because they work in an idiot's, man. They don't care. It's a chain, right? That's a chain, right? That's a, we don't have those. In, like, airports and stuff. It's like, and they'll have them. It's like having like dipping dots at the, they'll like have small outlets at the fucking movie at the,

oh, okay. They're really good. I was told with other customers to come back. Another lady was how they laugh at it. Same cashier who said to come back said they were closed when the selling window and pickup window were still open. And the park was still open for business.

Park is already having a hard time, financially as it is. Why close up early and not sell the product, especially when it was freshly made to sell? Also funny to imagine the park is, I mean, maybe this is it, but I assume the park isn't getting the money from the Annie Ann stand. Yeah, I think they're just getting a space, right? They get a fixed amount that they pay for that space. I don't think they get like, yeah. The mall's having a hard time because they aren't selling enough Ed Hardy at the ball right now. It's like, I mean, I don't, I think it will, I mean, listen, it can happen in the end if the stores shut down because they're not selling. stuff but yeah i don't think that there's like revenue sharing and stuff like that on it i do want to

quickly read this other ip one it's it's not very long but the first guy goes just any music in general the idea for hard rock park was awesome i'd love to see you know wait wait this is the one asking what i p he would like to become a writer apart this is another okay he goes just any music in general the idea of hard rock park was awesome i'd love to see another shot at it imagine a beatles land or a Bob Marley Water Area. You know I'd be hanging in that Bob Marley Water Area. I'm imagining a Bob Marley water area and that is, yeah.

This one I think you guys are really going to like the idea. I have this grand scheme in my head of a Microsoft Park with them picking up so many game titles recently, having little lands or rides like Minecraft Halo, Elder Scrolls, a forza coaster, Fallout, Call of Duty, zombie shooters. to ride. And this guy goes, well, if there's a Microsoft part, Banjo Cazooey is a must.

Oh, yeah. He goes, I like the thought of an area with banjo plus Spiro and Crash. Yep. This guy just says money heist. Money heist. Is that the movie money heist? TV show. The movie's Tower heist.

So they want to make a TV show? What? This one? I mean, Microsoft Land, you're talking about like with a Minecraft area. Like, that could work. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then this guy just says James Bond won't be a perfect IP for a theme park attraction. Since Amazon just bought MGM Studios, do you think they would open a theme park themselves?

And this guy just replies and goes, I mean, they also own the boys, Borat and many other things. Oh, a Borat ride. Forget about it. The Borat ride. That's good, man. It's more relevant than ever, man. Yeah. My wife.

Yeah, that's what I was going to say, like a great ride for you and your wife. You know, yeah. Hell yeah. Yeah, that's funny. I have a lot more stuff, but, uh, what's he up to these days, Sasha Barron Cohen? Is he still doing his comedy stuff? I couldn't tell you.

I've checked. What's he up? A hard trailer to watch. Did you see it? The first one. For Ollie G. movie? Yeah. I listen, I'll be honest with you.

Yeah, I did check out when I sort of realized what Borat really was. It sort of turned me off of his whole thing. Yeah. It's sort of in light of maybe. Listen, Luke, I'll be honest. Whether he sometimes I'll ask where I, where, what a guy's doing nowadays. I know exactly what he's doing. I figured you knew exactly what.

And it ain't good. No, I figured. Yeah, it turns out maybe some of the stuff he was doing was based in ideology that maybe we thought we shared with him. But actually it's quite different from our. Yeah, it turns out that the point behind the whole thing was actually quite disturbing and horrific. All right. Luke, do you have anything you'd like to plug? I do.

Of course, Stores podcast, hosted by me and Dead Blossom Jesse. Chris and Brian have both been on guests on it in the previous, previous times. And you can check me out at Twitch.tv.TV slash the Luke man, or I'm doing crazy stuff. You're doing crazy shit there. We'll sometimes raid you on a Sunday night. And it's like, all fucking tune in because on the raid, right? It takes you over there. And I'm like, what the hell is this? I know. You can't imagine the shit I'm getting up to it. It's just gaming. Okay. We're doing a lot more.

Yeah, Twitch is, this is for some of our older listeners. Twitch ain't just gaming now. Yeah. No, guys do other stuff. Yeah, guys do other stuff. And a lot of them are friends with these guys, too. Yeah. Are you in the gook crew?

I am. Yeah. You guys will throw my mouse. Well, we are not. We hate the gook. We have such a rivalry with them, and I didn't even realize that. They don't like us. They don't like us and they won't let us in.

But like, it's not becoming in you. It's politics. Think about it. Mostly, we're the most leftists, we're leftist podcast. Our relationship with the guru crew has suffered since some of these, the new politics that are happening. I know. Right.

Right. Right. Well, you guys, we, I mean, we're left as two. I guess it's just like kind of a different opinion. And like, we don't want to like arm everybody. You're far less prominent than I am. I would say you're left of center. I'd say you're leftist left of center.

Yes. But I don't know. I mean, pretty close to the, just pretty plug in that center. Yeah, yeah. Yeah. You know. We're hanging to the. left pole by a threat as we're

right. Whereas we're like, we're totally out of the leftist. We're out of the We're communist. You're the dirtbag left which is such a cool term of that. Ryan invented the dirtbag left. He's known as the podfather. Gump cake. I'm out of here. We got to go. See you next week.

Bye.