GYM GIRLS LOCKER ROOM - being in your 20s is OVERWHELMING

Episode Date: April 9, 2024

EP 06 - your 20s can be confusing and at times, daunting. everyone says it's the most important time of your life, making you feel like you need to have everything figured out. but honestly, it feels like everyone else knows what they're doing except you. the pressure to "do it all" and the pervasive feeling that everyone else seems to have it all figured out can be overwhelming. this episode, Syd who's currently 26 and Ellis who has recently stepped into her 20s, offer their perspectives about what being in your 20s is really like. they chat about their experiences in their 20s, expectations vs reality, the development of your pre frontal cortex (IYKYK), comparison is the thief of joy, feeling like you're not doing enough, Syd's advice to Ellis, things that have surpised them about their 20s and more. WATCH the full episode on YouTube: https://youtu.be/dRSWVkjv6NM 💘 join the GGLR community: INSTA - https://www.instagram.com/gymgirlslockerroom/ FACEBOOK COMMUNITY PAGE - https://bit.ly/3TqhxDG TIKTOK - https://www.tiktok.com/@gymgirlslockerroom/ 📲 find Syd on socials: INSTA - https://www.instagram.com/sydgrows/ TIKTOK - https://www.tiktok.com/@sydgrows/ GYMSHARK - 10% off code: SYDNEY MENTIONED: Book: The Defining Decade by Dr. Meg Jay Truly Twenties Community: https://www.trulytwenties.co.uk/about Big Think article: https://bigthink.com/personal-growth/is-twenty-something-the-defining-decade/

Life in your 20s. I feel like we're coming from a very interesting perspective because I am 26, Ellis is 20. It allows for this interesting discussion on your 20s. The thing that's been hard about my 20s is just confronting these expectations that maybe like a child version of myself placed on myself. I didn't expect to lose so many friends. I feel like that was the moment I felt like I really stepped into adulthood. For me, that was a really noticeable point in which I felt this sort of transition within myself. It's been a couple days. I was just walking along and sister goes,

Ah! Ellis, what is that? Okay, Goosey's assumed position. That means we are ready to go. Hello and welcome back to the Gym Girls Locker Room podcast hosted by me, Sydney Castee and... Ellis. Like, what else was I supposed to say? We're making no progress.

Hi. And me, Ellis. Oh, me, Ellis. Hey. Yes, Ellis, my sister. Sister. And my right-hand woman. And my co-host.

And my everything in between. How are you, Ellis? I'm good. It's been a couple days. Has it? It's been a couple days. How so? I feel like I've been living peacefully.

And then the last couple of days i'm just thinking what's going on what is going on yeah i was going to manchester to see my sea star and we were going to go watch the ray concert yes um and sea star picks me up from the station and you know i love a lipton peach iced tea love um sorry what flavor are we going for peach obviously yeah so she uh puts her drink in her bag when she gets off the train and she goes to meet sissy uh she is ellis okay let's just fast forward so i was just walking along and sister goes ah ellis what is that and i look at my bag and it's drenched in water and then i'm like oh no my water's leaked oh no my freaking laptop is in my bag and so i opened the bag and my laptop is drowning in peach uh it's a peach iced tea but the day didn't end there because we went we went to the ray concert and we got there and sid got scammed for the tickets yeah so then

we couldn't get into the concert we got denied access so then and also might i add we i bought these tickets for ellis and as a i bought them on a five months ago i bought them five months ago it got rescheduled i bought them as a present so the show had already sold out so i already paid an inflated price and i think i don't know things just got confused but they refused our entrance and Ellis had literally traveled up from London to Manchester like which if you don't know is like half you know across the country in England and I was like nah and I just I was frustrated at myself and so I was willing to pay any price I didn't care how much it came to um because it was weird I like had the tickets but I couldn't get hold of them or whatever anyway so the lady the lady's just like, yeah, you can't get in.

And I'm just like, okay, well, do you have any tickets? And luckily, because it had been rescheduled, I think they'd given some people the option if they can't make the sold out tour date that they could refund. So I pay for it. And then, yeah, literally we go in and then like 20 minutes later,

I get the ticket come through from the original selling platform. But it was just like stress. And anyway, we had a great night or I had a great night. I stopped looking at the videos. It's so funny because Ellis hasn't been to like hardly any podcasts. Concerts. Concerts.

Throughout growing up, I remember you went to Beyonce when we were younger. And I was like, are you actually joking me? Went to Beyonce with my mom. That is a slay and a half. It was iconic. But yeah, I didn't go to any growing up for some reason. I guess maybe I just didn't have any. The only concerts I probably wanted to go to were like Katy Perry or something.

And they were probably like £700,000. Yeah. Good old Katy Perry. But I'm kind of a concert uh girl now were you gonna say a concert connoisseur i've been like five to four yeah um and i love them it's just something about them yeah it's just different also i love when you like you realise how talented the artist you already love is. That's so good. I am feeling great. Good.

I've got my favourite socks on. Yeah. I just saw you. I've never seen you so happy this morning, but you were touching your feet and I was thinking, what's going on? I wasn't touching my feet. She was putting her socks on. Yeah.

And you're like, these are my favourite socks. I love them. For anyone not watching, they're like these are my favorite socks i love them for anyone not watching they're like these green i don't know i feel like they're like mohair or something but i just love them and i love like running around on the carpet with them they look toasty i can't lie yeah they make me really happy so anyway i know today's gonna be a good day because I've got my favorite socks on anyway um I guess we should dive in dive into the episode but before we do besties do us a favor give us a follow if you're listening or subscribe if you're watching on youtube um it really really helps us out it pushes the show out further and um we'll just love you forever like that's real yeah yeah remember you can find us on instagram and facebook and actually pretty much all other platforms at gym girls locker room

so we're doing life in your 20s um which i'm actually kind of excited to like spend some time reflecting on and diving into i feel like we're coming from a very interesting perspective because don't worry i'm not there yet ellis is looking at me thinking i'm going to say we want someone starting in their 20s and someone finishing we got an elderly lady hey wait but actually i was thinking how old am i i've kind of forgotten to me you're 27 this year oh yeah so i'm 26 ellis is 20 she is a wee baby but it kind of allows for this interesting discussion on your 20s if you are listening and you are beyond your 20s or younger than your 20s i'm still sure that there's like much of what

we're talking about that you will be able to relate to and i feel like it's just it's kind of just talking about like that that moment in time that period of time it's also mad to think that like I'm in my 20s whereas like when I was 18 I looked at people that were like I thought people that were 20 I'm like god when I'm 20 I'm gonna have my life together but I don't think I've changed since I was like 15 well it's actually funny you say that because I just watched a Jennifer Jennifer Aniston reel okay yeah random it came up but it was like this audio that she'd done an edit to and it's this idea that like when you turn 27 you're also still 26 and you're also still 25 and that you know on some days you're you're your five-year-old self

and you're having a cry and you're missing your parents or whatever and that sometimes when you lash out and you are really freaking immature you're your 18 year old self and I thought that was so beautiful I literally watched that today so it's kind of relevant for me I feel like I'm like 23 24 but every year I feel like I'm two years below it kind of changes lockdown and I wonder if that is COVID or if that is just a thing no I totally agree with that that's all I gotta say and that's all I gotta say on the matter yeah because it is like literally when I look back to that lockdown time I think like what did I actually do for two years a hell of nothing yeah well I did do some fun little bits and pieces in lockdown what did you do um well in a desperation to kind of hold on to any kind of sanity that I had left in our chaotic household I well I was just doing I was doing a few weird artsy

little projects one of which being I dug up clay with my dad my god where yeah where was that in the garden I dug up clay from the depths of our garden like I'm talking I went deep into the ground and um I made I like filtered all of the clay the soil from the clay the clay from the soil and I made a pot out of the clay from my garden um and it took freaking it literally took like the best part of a day to do uh but the thing I respect is that my dad is such a yes man he just was like on board with it and at the time I wasn't doing any content creation or anything but I decided I wanted to make a little video to go on my instagram and yeah he just anyway was that when you made paper as well or was that before that was for uni yeah actually that was around the same kind of time um she was

in her making era she was in her caveman my boyfriend said to me the other day he was like you're actually you're actually like a little undercover hippie I'm like oh oh yeah no no no oh oh yeah anyway what were your expectations of your 20s would you say um what like from when when I was younger um yeah because I've actually like this is such a relevant episode because like i've seen a lot recently about this and like how when people were like younger they'd be like okay i'm gonna be with someone at 20 get married at 23 have a baby at 25 have a house at 27 and it's just so funny to see like how the expectation was and the reality is i didn't really know where i saw myself at 20 because i never ever knew what i wanted to do ever i had like no idea so i just

i don't know i feel like we're we've we're very different like i feel like you I don't know correct me if I'm wrong but you always knew what career you wanted to do yeah to some degree yeah well for me my expectations of my 20s I guess is like role model or like yeah was like role model to me by my parents and their parents and uh I guess like the media at the time um I thought that your 20s were when you're living your adult life like yeah it makes sense you've got you've got on from like your teenage years your 20s you're an adult so as soon as you hit your 20s you need to be moving out you need to be like finding the love of your life you also need to be like absolutely slaying your career you need to have like all the friends do all the dinner parties you need to like just show up as like everything you possibly you know dream and imagine um oh let me add on traveling oh yeah cleaning maybe a house renovation I really had like high expectations for myself and I guess

coming at it now at like 26 I feel like I'm like settling into this kind of new expectation I will say I've only kind of just started settling into this this like you know what I'm not going to put the pressure on myself mentality and it's been eye-opening for certain I love the thing that people do when they say about how like well if you're if you're 20 well you can kind of take whatever age you like but say okay you're an adult officially when you're 21 well then really I'm only a five-year-old adult that is so true and so like I don't know, I find that helpful. This isn't very important, but I literally cry every birthday. It's traumatising.

I hate growing up. I think it's like when you start your 20s, you're like, you see your 20s as something like, oh, I'm getting to the end of my teens. Actually, here I can perfectly encapsulate it. You know when you're in primary school which is like i don't know what that is for like the americans but like you're in the first school i don't know i don't know what they call it elementary school yeah middle school yeah yeah i don't know it's elementary i'm gonna use the uk terms i feel like going through your 20s is like when you're at primary school and you're in year six, you're at the top of the class, you know, like you're, you know, you know how everything's going. And that's like the equivalent of being in your teenage years. Right.

And you think about like going to the bigger school and you're like, oh, yeah, I'm going to be like so grown when I go there. Right. And I'm going to have everything figured out and I like outgrown being at this school it's exactly the same and then you hit your 20s and you're like oh my gosh suddenly you realize you're a lot smaller and a lot younger than you thought you're in school with 18 year olds you don't 12 you don't know you don't know what you're talking about and so I feel like your 20s is very much like that like going from like a younger school to a bigger school and I think the more I've moved through to my through my 20s the more I've kind of accepted and realized that like I don't there's so much I don't know and I feel like with every year I find it easier to accept that I'm not

going to know all the answers and that I'm just I'm just winging it like everyone else is and just we're all doing this all for the first time I think I do want to just like take note of what you said about how you find your birthdays hard I always cry well for my separate reasons I always cry on my birthday however I cry on my birthdays because it's like an emotional time it's a whole year that's passed by and with that it's kind of a point in which you reflect on what you've been up to what you're happy with what you're not like it's understandable that you feel all those sorts of emotions however I think as I started getting a bit older, I kind of really am able to see the beauty in getting older. And how exciting it is and how just special it is moving through these different sort of eras of your life and we're so fortunate to be blessed to have another year on this life and I think it's like a shame to not appreciate that

when like some people have it so rough and some people aren't even here, you know. And so I don't know if that is you and you are someone that sort of finds the idea of getting older. No matter how old you are, tough. I would just ask you to kind of try to reframe that in your head. Because it's such a beautiful, special thing to be blessed with another life on the planet. Another year. Yeah. i just love i said it in one of the past episodes i love learning and like even with life i just love all the things that i'm learning and i'm experiencing as i move through my 20s

and i think that's where i give myself a lot more sort of grace with not having all the answers and not figuring it out and I think the thing that's been hard about my 20s is just kind of confronting these expectations that maybe like a child version of myself like baby sydney it's like placed on myself you know so it's like you know me now i'm fine moving through things i think it's just i battle these past thoughts past expectations I placed on myself um so yeah I think that's where I'm at with myself I feel quite content I'm 26 and I'm feeling quite happy and I I feel the my 30s on the horizon and I actually feel really excited by it how did you feel at the start of your 20s at the start of my 20s would you say you're in like a similar position or

I think so for me at the start of my 20s I was at uni and so I kind of felt like I had a little safety blanket of oh well I don't need to think about things like because I'm in my I'm at university and this is the plan and da-da-da-da. I think when you do first approach your 20s, you have a certain sort of confidence and maybe an arrogance in some ways. Because you have the whole of your 20s, do you think? Yeah, or just like lack of, I don't know, I'm trying to cast my mind back. I mean, yeah. How do you think yeah or just like lack of I don't know I'm trying to cast my mind back I mean yeah do you feel no I agree with that because it's like I don't know everyone's situation is different but you're you're fresh out of school and being treated like a child still

and you've only just about had a couple years independence like if that um and you still haven't like fully like I don't feel like an adult yet I still can't even like sometimes be on the phone with people because I get nervous I feel like it is a massive jump from like 20 to 26 for sure yeah there's like a math that the whole of your 20s is just a huge learning curve massively I think a lot of the pressure as well comes from this thing that is all too often kind of pushed on to us like oh you know you can't make the most of it you know you hear maybe parents or people say oh you just you know I didn't do you know this feeling of not doing enough yeah and I think that can feel stressful I mean I wonder do you

feel this being at the start of your 20s do you feel that stress pressure yet because you've still got like a decade ahead of you so perhaps do you feel like the world's kind of your oyster like what kind of space are you in I feel like I've always thought the 20s my 20s is to like make mistakes and like this is the time to take risks and do things so I've never fully been like but that's I feel like more to do with like career because I never knew what I wanted to do so I thought I've got my 20s to figure it out but I don't know I've never really thought in depth about um that it's weird because we say like oh my 20s are you know for making mistakes but it feels so hard to make those mistakes. And I feel like on one hand, you're like, oh, you know, it's okay to make mistakes.

But then on the other hand, you're like, I've got to have it all figured out. So I feel like there's quite a lot of conflicting feelings in your 20s. I think also because I'm the youngest and because I've never known what I wanted to do with like my career. Mum and dad have always been like, don't worry, you've got loads of time. Whereas like you're the first and you probably it was a lot more pressure to be like, what am I going to do? Panic, you know? I think it definitely comes down to like personality as well. Because I am just someone that's always wanted to like prioritize career and you know it's like I feel like you have all of these dreams and

these goals and stuff and it's just really hard to action them it can feel really overwhelming and like all the things you want to do can't coexist at the same time. Like, I want to travel, but I also want to have a flat in a city, but I also want to live in the countryside. I want to be near my friends, but I also want to, like, explore new places. It's hard. I want to have a dog, but I also want a cat. You know what I mean? Like, it just feels a lot.

I think a big thing that's, like, helped me is thinking me is thinking everybody is on their own timeline when it comes to life. Some people have success at 16 and some don't until they're 40. It's all different. I think it comes back to that idea of that notion of yeah is the thief of joy and the more you compare yourself to others the more you're just going to make yourself so unhappy and you're going to put so much pressure on yourself you know I definitely have my struggles with that and I find you just live a much happier life when you're just not doing so um what's been one of the biggest surprises since jumping into your 20s

I mean you're five months in but still maybe wait let me reflect that to you first I feel like one of the biggest surprises has been that every year I honestly feel like a different person yeah and I feel like I am definitely settling more into myself now we're going to come into this a little bit later on about this prefrontal cortex maturing because for me that's been like just can it's been so apparent and like well it's been brain altering because that's literally what happened but it's been really like significant really really significant in my life and I'm sure a lot of people feel that way in their 20 when they hit 25 but up until then I felt like every single year I was just changing so much and um I really feel like I'm sort of in ways unrecognizable

to how I was when I entered my 20s which is maybe why I'm finding it hard to remember um because I feel so far from that that version of myself I do also think that something that's really surprised me is kind of how the people I entered my 20s with are completely different I was about to say that yeah that's quite crazy I think that's if I was going to think about like something that's surprised me like that would probably be it because you are just shifting and changing and every experience that you have with in your 20s kind of molds you into this sort of new version of yourself and I didn't expect to lose so many friends in the same breath I've also like had so many friends into my life new friends into my life and um yeah it's just really surprised me I think I that's the one I thought of um

like going from being at school where you can't avoid people and you just you see people every day without even having to try and then doing that switch from having actually having to try with people and seeing who actually is your real friend I guess yeah well definitely it's that thing of like I do remember that actually quite vividly it is this thing of like oh well are we friends because we see each other every day or are we friends because we actually choose to be yeah I think also what I'm struggling with at the moment is, with my 20s, is I'm in a full-time job, whereas all my friends are at uni. Or they just don't have the same, they're like, yeah, period. They're not on the same sort of, you don't have the same lifestyle at the moment.

No. of you don't have the same lifestyle at the moment no the 20s are definitely an interesting age no matter what period you're at within your 20s because it's this kind of I always remember this joke of like your 20s are that sort of age where you have a friend getting engaged. A friend moving across the country. A friend working a part-time job. A friend having a baby. It's this time in your life where I guess it feels like everyone's on completely different paths. That's probably why people overthink so much as well and compare. Because people think that's the normal when it's not.

It's just like everyone's on different paths yeah completely it feels that's and again if you do let comparison sort of get in the way that's where you feel sort of that overwhelmed because you're like but beth from my primary school there's no beth from my primary school but beth from my primary school she's got three kids at this age she's got a bloody house she's got a house and three kids I haven't got that but guess what

I've got a dog and I've got my own flat and it's like it's so easy to look at what we don't have when actually if we just spend some time focusing on what we do have then I think we'd be a little bit more gracious towards ourselves i can't wait for my front front my prefrontal cortex cortex to develop okay so yeah i'm gonna explain this for anyone that doesn't know um

the development of the prefrontal cortex in the mid-20s coincides with significant life decisions regarding career changes, relationships and personal beliefs. The increased cognitive capabilities associated with a mature prefrontal cortex such as abstract thinking and the ability to integrate complex information play a crucial role in forming one's identity and making life choices aligned with one's values and goals. So the prefrontal cortex, in layman's terms, is the last part of your brain that actually fully develops. And that doesn't happen until you're 25. So if you're younger than 25 give yourself some grace if you're listening to yourself and you've been a little bit tough on yourself just give yourself

some grace um but yeah i definitely found when i hit 25 this complete and utter shift in almost everything your life literally changed yeah and I definitely think that is down to that that maturing um suddenly everything changed by way of like how I was living my life what I wanted to do what I was interested in who I chose to spend my time with is really this like shift you're halfway through your 20s and um yeah I feel like I came out the other side really in a great, great place. I'm really happy with how I developed. That is mad how like something developing can actually do that. Yeah. It's just change.

Let's have a look. Oh, here you go. The prefrontal cortex plays an important role in executive functions, including decision making and stress controllability. Wow. Piggybacking off of like the prefrontal cortex like discussion um I feel like that was the moment I felt like I really stepped into like adulthood for me that was like a really noticeable point in which I felt this sort of transition within myself and then it was like oh damn something has actually taken place in my brain that probably is allowing me to feel this way you know yeah here's an article from big

think as well on the topic our 20s are the defining decade of adulthood 80 of life's most defining moments take place by age 35 two-thirds of lifetime wage growth happens during the first 10 years of a career. More than half of Americans are married or dating or living with their future partner by age 30. Personality can change more during our 20s than at any other decade in life and female fertility peaks at 28. the brain caps off its last major growth spurt dr meg j you know what after hearing that it's like no bloody like no bloody wonder i'm stressed what the heck you're telling me i'm supposed to fit all of that in your 20 10 years i don't know what that voice was no it was like interesting it's honestly like no shit no shit i'm stressed no shit i feel pressure

that's a lot yeah and also it's like going back to school you're like i feel like you're kind of, is it called hand-fed? Everything at school. And then you're just let out with no information about anything in your 20s. And then you have to figure out what the hell you're doing with your life. Yeah, no, for sure. I think also I wonder, is there a certain pressure for women growing up through your 20s because we we're told about this like biological clock so it's like suddenly it feels like we're some sort of

failure if we've reached 30 and we haven't done everything we set out to do before we like reach this age where, oh shoot, I should probably start having children. I mean, I also want to clarify, I absolutely do not agree with that. However, you know, I've even been led to feel that way. You know, I'm 26 now and I feel the pressure of like wanting to have a career and really grow and scale my like business. But also thinking about like, if I want kids when I'm 30, does that mean I've only got like four years? Okay, great. So if I've got four years, then I need to travel. And I don't have enough time for my friends.

And I have this like vision in my head where I want to like have a house and like do a house renovation so like how do I fit that into the four years and so suddenly it just feels like this like growing list of pressures and things that we need to do by the age of 30 and I think if there's anything I've kind of learned along the way so far is just kind of relieve yourself of those pressures and when they come they come maybe you know if there are certain things that you really want to work towards focus on them sort of one at a time it's so overwhelming if you see everything just like you're looking at everything and you're like oh my gosh but maybe if we actually just break it down a little bit more things are definitely different now as well yeah like for like more people are realizing like you don't need to do all this just chill there's probably this sorry i'm just thinking of like career in your 20s.

And probably also the pressure of like maybe people that do have jobs in their 20s. And then they're like, maybe at the end of their 20s and they're like, I don't like this. Then they're like, I'm at the end of my 20s. Yeah. Well, some advice from Dr. Meg Jay is the advice for navigating the tumultuous period includes embracing the uncertainty taking action towards goals and leveraging milestones for self-reflection and direction and i kind of love that i feel like that's everything we've been talking about yeah just embracing it and just being like you know what i have no freaking idea what's going on no one else

does either we're all winging it we're all doing this shit for the first time and moving forward with it yeah i like that point about like this is your first time doing it yeah like even with like your parents and stuff like that it's like it's their first time you know yeah do you have any regrets in my 20. Is there anything like you wish you'd done? Or something that you wish you didn't do? Yeah well regrets I don't know it's an interesting point for me because I guess I'm like halfway through or just a little over so there's still time there's still you know anything that I really choose to answer this question by I could do something about I think for me I never I haven't really done like the whole traveling thing and that's something that in my 25th year of the planet I really perhaps that was one of those sort of decision making things I did where I thought you know what

I'm gonna go because I think it's like I'm so concerned about like the pressures of being able to support myself and find a career path that's like successful for me that I feel fulfilled in and that sort of thing that I think perhaps sometimes along the way I've forgotten to kind of enjoy myself and just live a little bit and so that was like definitely like the action that I took in my 25th year where I went off to Thailand and I kind of I made a pact with myself that I was gonna do a long trip somewhere far away just because Sydney not anyone else just because I want to to go and I want to see the world. And I, to be honest, still battle with it myself. You know, I do have these thoughts throughout the day where I'm like, you know, throughout my week where I'm like.

Should I just pack up my bags and move to Thailand or like, should I just pack up my bags and move to Thailand or like should I just pack up my bags and move to and it's like I think sometimes it feels overwhelming in your 20s because you do feel like you've got this kind of like untapped potential you could do anything you really wanted people are shoving down your throats the whole time that you've got so much time on your side and that you should really like seize the opportunity and almost sometimes you have like decision paralysis and you don't know what direction to even move in so I think I've just tried to like yeah I travel a little bit more and enjoy the the moments sometimes I feel like I'm just existing okay do you want to like do you want to should we break that down a little bit i feel like something just may be missing up there up there as in in your brain yeah just like i feel like i've always felt a bit lost yeah with some with like i mean i feel very secure

but i don't know i did struggle with my mental health when i was younger and i feel like maybe that could have been a big part of it um but i don't know it's a bit deep okay we can go i just thought i'd say that statement if anyone feels like that i'd love to know like bouncing off of that like where would you like to see yourself at the end of your 20s oh my god maybe not even specifically but like what are you hoping yeah you know a big goal for me right now is to like find it sounds really materialistic but like to have a lot of money okay um so ellis is gonna be enter her hustle era in her 20s my goal always was to have a family with a husband and like live in like a farmhouse okay so hopefully near there okay

29 so so so am i reading correctly that when you say you want a lot of money and a husband, you mean you want to marry rich? No. Well, I wouldn't mind. No, I want to make my own money. As a show queen. Honestly, I just don't know. There's a whole lot of blank up there okay I guess for me by the end of my 20s I'd like to have worked through sort of this thing that I feel like I have done somewhat so far

of just taking the pressure off of myself there's like internal pressure I put on myself um although I do hope by the end of my 20s I kind of have a better sort of sense of who I am I think I've been definitely doing a good job of that in my 20s I've definitely grown a lot in like confidence I say no to things I don't want to do and I say yes to things I do want to do and I don't let other people's opinions sway me which is something that I used to do a lot and um yeah I just hope that I'm like I don't know I would really like to just build upon what I feel like I've been doing now you said that I sound so I know I really I was trying to help you out there I was was thinking, girl. No, that's just like the surface level stuff, I guess.

Okay, well, dig a bit deeper then. There's nothing up there. There's actually nothing. I feel like we're getting some resistance. I don't know, maybe. Maybe I need therapy. Maybe. It's okay. You know, maybe this perfectly illustrates

you don't have to have all the answers. Maybe. Oh my God, I thought of a fun little exercise. Go on. What would I tell you? Oh no, that's adorable. Yeah. What would I tell my younger sister

who's just entered her 20s, as someone who's somewhat of a seasoned veteran? Okay. I would say, and I'm absolutely just like going off the top of my dome. Sorry. I would say like, so take the pressure off yourself. Live for yourself. And be selfish.

But always move forward with like kindness. I think I spent the first part of my 20s being quite catty. Probably unnecessarily. So I don't feel like you'll have to struggle with that because you're a lot more mature than I am say yes to like the things that scare you and get really honest with yourself and what your truest intentions are I think I spent a lot of my 20s ignoring what my body was trying to tell me. Let go of people that don't allow you to be your best version of yourself. Pick up some hobbies.

Because, you know, that brought a lot of light to my 20s that I didn't have if I reflect on where I am now I think like starting hobbies really helped save some more money to do the things you want to do yeah I guess going off that like if I actually genuinely do sit down and think like what don't I like about what me right now not don't like but you know what i'd want to change is i guess like confidence with things um like just having more confidence because i used to be really confident when i was younger and they just got knocked down I don't know I feel like yeah I guess I am quite like reserved still and it's like hard to like break through yeah it comes with time yeah and life experiences yeah and I think pushing yourself to do things that scare you is a really excellent way to do that yeah so true

you don't grow unless you're outside your comfort zone I mean it's true um but yeah I think that's what I would say to my younger self slash my baby sister on that lovely sweet little note i did just want to give some recommendations um first off is a book if you guys are interested in this topic and you do feel like you want some guidance definitely recommend the defining decade by dr meg j we quoted her earlier shout out to dr meg j i don't know why i did that um also there's a lot of communities out there um particularly for navigating your 20s much in the same way we have the jim carter's locker room community on facebook there are other ones out there um one of them is just the truly 20s community um where you can find like like-minded people and you know just feel like you're in it together with

you know other people thank you so much for watching I think I'm going to end it there on that lovely note um I do just want to remind you guys to give us a follow or subscribe whichever button it is on your viewing platform if you do want to watch us, we are exclusively over on YouTube. So do check us out. Otherwise, enjoy us through your headphones. In the meantime, don't forget to find us at Gym Girls Locker Room on all platforms. And we'll see you in the next one. Bye.

Bye.