Hamish & Andy - 331 - "Like a Palm Tree in a Tornado" 💨🌴

Episode Date: May 13, 2026

In the hope of winning Bec’s approval to include it in her and Andy’s wedding, the boys continue preparing for the ring ceremony rehearsal, with Horgs tasked with chipping a golf ball down the aisle. Hamish brings a real-life conundrum involving his mum to the boys, while Andy accuses Bec of something that sees Hamish step in as her lawyer. Plus, the boys hear some hilarious Extreme Empaths and, after a long hiatus, Incredible Drops makes its return! 1. The Wedding Rehearsal Plan & Celebrant’s Words 2. Extreme Empaths 3. Hamish’s Mum’s Lunch Ruined 4. Incredible Drops 5. The Court of Andy Lee 

A listener production. Activate your internet. Because the Hamish and Andy podcast starts in three, two. Sorry, still buffering. Ahoie to me Doric. Hamish. Ahoy. Ahoy.

God, that word does ring a bell. It's something to do with shipbuilding. Oh, okay. Really? But it's something. There's something. I've genuinely. never heard that.

Ahoy to my Ionic, Jack. I'm going to take back my shipbuilding guess. And I am the Corinthian. Oh, it's archers. It's archers. Wow.

Gosh, you're really close hands. Was it? Pillars. He's got it. Pills. Pillars. What a player. Pillars often used in a shipbuilding temple

where the builders would pray before going down to build their ships in ancient Grecian times. The three types of columns or flash pillars for classical architecture. Yeah, Doric is the oldest and the simplest style.

There's no base on that one. No need. Just go straight up. No need. Fast and loose. Fast and loose pillar. It'll do its job, but it's not flashing around. Ionic, more slender and elegant than the Doric has a base.

And then the Corinthian is the most ornate. Show off. Yeah, a bit of tall, thin and very detailed at the top. They're the pillars you think about and you know, your big stuff. Trump would have them. Yeah, hit two or eight. For sure. I agree. I'd prefer to be an Ionic, I think.

Ionic is iconic. We are the three pillars of which this show is based on. Very good, Andrew. And Ahoi to the listeners would be the fourth pillar. And Andre has hit us at Hamish nanny.com to tell us what she has been up to. Ahoy, boys, and Gusto be with you on this fine day. Thought I would check in to give you an update on my husband's new painting obsession, as Hayme might call it.

We've been married for three years now, so naturally my husband has fallen into the world of painting. Suddenly everything in life is about painting, and I too see him trying to practice his brushstrokes throughout the house. Friday night suddenly see him in bed by 9.30, so he can get up and be first in line at the paints store. There's no one likes to get stuck behind big groups of paintings when you're a man on a mission.

Thoughts and prayers to all the waggogs out there, which of course is wives and girlfriends of golfers. Not golfers? Gusto be with you. Golfers, painters. Painters, painting fans. Well, he sounds like a wonderfully enthusiastic artist. Yeah, look forward to seeing some of his pictures that he puts together, whether they be watercoloured, or just a simple sponge or brushstroke.

He sounds like, and the more you practice your painting, Betty, as Davinci would always say, when young painters would come to him saying, I keep painting with a slice, you've just got to paint a bit more from the inside and you'll figure it out. Watch a YouTube clip, that'll sort you out. You simply need a painting aid that you can buy off Instagram and that will fix your paint. You keep painting slices.

It's painting off the right side of the canvas. Hey, Ando, we've got on the horizon come out, we agreed on this a couple of weeks ago to do the rehearsal or to do the test for one of your big wedding ideas. Well, not my wedding ideas. It was your wedding idea. It's your wedding. Yeah, but it's my wedding. ideas in your wedding. Well, it would be our idea because you had to introduce it through your mouth.

That's right. Beck Poo-Pooed this one. I think you're talking about, this is Hawks, who's also a groomsman. People know from the show. He, when the rings are going to be presented, he walks down the middle aisle, pulls out a 56 degree wedge, I think it was. He said a pitching wedge for those of us, for the art fans wondering what paintbrush is used.

Which is a lower lofted paintbrush. And he's confident with it. Chip a container. with the rings in it, so it's in a ball-shaped container to, am I catching it or my brother? No, Cam, best man, your brother is catching it? I will be there as sort of a slips fielder in case the chip is a bit off. And I'll be on the side.

You were meant to get the case. How's that going? Because that was the first step before. So we had a very, very lovely listener with the show, reach and go, hey, we do, me and my dad run a business, we fabricate materials for this, not this exact reason. I think this is the first. You're our first ever customer.

You wouldn't believe. There's a bit of a backlog. Several years waiting list for the golf ball case because everyone wants them for their wedding. You might be able to get you up the waiting list. It is a well-worn tradition at weddings these days that the rings are presented in this way. They said, look, you know, it's the kind of thing we do.

We'd love to have a crack. The quote came back this week, and I just said, great pause before we build this for the rehearsal. Yes. Because it's, I think this is. is a beautiful gesture for the wedding, and I think all the wedding guests would like to see it. I think you think it's a beautiful gesture,

but I think we do need to run a full rehearsal to prove that it's a $2,600. Oh, wow. $2,600 for this is the case? Wow. Let's just mark that to one. I'm sure there's some corners we can cut there. Yeah.

Or if needs be, an actual golf ball, we can cut in half to produce it to make our own case. but I think it's important that we get the heart and soul of this idea across first, and that's what the rehearsals, that's what the test is about in the next couple of weeks. Yep. With your permission, Ando. But wait, wait, don't we need it for the test, or are we just going to test the real golf ball? I mean, the whole point is you'd be using the rings, you know, the rings go in.

I mean, you don't mind screwing a golf ball. Yes, okay. Yeah. Do you know what I mean? And the whole point is it will be the exact dimension. and weight of the golf. Anyway, so we can use one for the rehearsal. I think what we want to achieve when we do this dry run,

and I'm thinking we find a venue that we can have aisles of chairs. We can have you at the front ando. Did Jack we say that you're going to be wearing a wig being Beck? Yeah, I think we might have said that. Did I imagine that or did we say that? That'd be good. I think if Jack's there as Beck in the wedding dress? No.

You can't say it before the day. Or do you want to be the celebrant Jack? No, I'm happy. Actually, a celebrant makes more sense. Well, because I've written up a bit of a script here. Not that I dare write your wedding vows or tell the celebrant what to say, but celebrants do have a script. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

So I thought, tell me if I'm in the right ballpark here, Ando, great. For, you know, for writing what will be said in the rehearsal. Just for this little bit of the ceremonies. Just for this bit of the ceremony. Just for this bit of the ceremony, because we want to show Beck this. How can we? Yeah, of course.

film this and show it to her and go, listen, it maybe was getting lost in translation when you just heard it, but now that you've seen it, how beautiful is this as a moment? Yeah, great. So with that in mind, you know, I've obviously very conscious here that Beck's the audience. Of course. So I've sort of jazzed it up a bit to make it as Beck friendly as possible. So you're the celebrant at the moment in this. I'll read this now.

But obviously on the rehearsal, I'll need to be in a catching position as well, because I'm the backup catcher. Yeah. As the other groomsman, Cam, it's, Cam's meant to take the catch. But if it, the ball, God forbid,

sprays, I'll need to be in a catching position as well. And does Beck have, who's her maid of honor? I think it's her sister Poppy. Okay. So I was just thinking, I'll just quickly put this in the script now.

I've thought if we can include Poppy in a catching position as well. Yeah. She's pretty short. I'm not so. So just remember what I'm saying here. I'm not saying this is, we're not really making a real spree

sports team, it's just to show Beck. We don't now have to go and play cricket together after this. It's to show Beck that we, this isn't just all about you because it's meant to be the, your rings. That's good. You want her as incorporated as you.

Okay, sure, sure. All right. Because it's both of your rings. I've added one other bit. Do you want to know about it now or do you want to kind of halt the reading if you don't like how it comes up? Let's just hold the reading and see if I'm feeling it.

Okay. All right. So I'm the celebrant. You've done your vows. And, okay, okay. There's some nice music playing. Well, you now come to the most sacred part of the ceremony, the exchanging of the rings. Rings around, that you hear this a bit from Tom, Tom, Time, Out Weddings.

Rings around as they are a symbol of eternity, both into the future and where the couple has come from. I'm seeding in the idea of golf here. But let's not start with golf. Let's start with Beck. That's what I'm thinking. Yeah, yeah, good. Beck, a huge part of your life has been your love of dogs. That's why, to symbolise this,

the rings are being presented in this life-size cast of your preferred dog breed, a Scottish terrier. So that's a new bit I've added. So, hogs are hitting a dog? No, he's not hitting a dog. He's not hitting a dog. now walk down the aisle and there'll be a cast because your dog is a terrier. Just listen, Jake.

Your dog's a terrier. Yeah. And she's also had terriers before, hasn't she? That doesn't have to be a specific. Oh, okay. So there's a dog waiting next to the grass patch where hogs has to grab. Well, I was thinking we get a plaster cast made of a terrier. Yeah.

Okay. Like it can just be white, doesn't have to be coloured in. Yeah. Hoggs pulls that down. It could be on wheels. The feet could have wheels. He can walk the dog down halfway through. So it's like, okay, that's a nice bit for Beck

because it symbolizes her love of these dogs. The dog then splits in half. So you take the top half off the dog. Back to the celebrant. We will now open the terrier and take out the rigs. This is not helping. It's not helping. You have to believe that this is special.

Yeah, I know, but I don't. We will now open the terrier and take out the rings in their custom small golf ball case and place them on the red ceremonial turf to begin their exciting journey to the couple. Okay, so hold the ball down. Oh, sorry, before that, sorry, I've skipped a line. Andy, a large part of your life has been your love of small ball golf. Andy has said how much he often talks about how he enjoys the space and quiet of the golf course so he can think deeply about his love for Beck.

Yeah, I do. When I'm out there, it's often. So right? So we put that in, too. Okay, so now we're seeding the idea of golf and why Andy likes golf so much because it gives him time and space to think about his love. Yeah.

We'll now open the terrier, take out the rings, cuff and golf ball, blah, blah, blah, put them on the turf to begin their exciting journey to the couple. Groomsman Michael Hogan will now chip the rings to Best Man Can, symbolizing the role that supporting friends play in both Beck and Andy's lives, Hamish and Poppy will assume a backup catching position to further symbolise this. Yeah, that's lovely.

Hawks, Michael, please chip the rings. And I think Fords does that. Solemly, ideally, Cam catches them. There's a round of applause. During that applause, Hawks quickly puts the terrier back together and then, you know, stage hands take away the turf. and he comes and rejoins back on stage.

It's Mike, and it's great for the rehearsal. And so the idea being we'll rehearse this in a couple of weeks. We'll film it all, and then we'll put it in front of Beck as a final last-ditch attempt to see if she'll say yes. Now, of course, I added the dog bit in there, but as I was writing it, I just thought maybe her resistance was like, this is just so golfy. Yeah. And it's not about us.

It's about Andy's favorite pastime. So we're framing golf as the place you go to think about her. Yep. And we're also going in half of, Andy, not the only one that gets a special ring carrier. Yep. What about that dog box? Yes. Yeah, I'm not sure that she'll come at the dog box.

Does it have to split in half? Can you take the rings off the dog color or something? That's not a bad idea. That's nicer, isn't it? That's better. Yeah. Okay. Is it splitting in half that no good? I just think she loves, like, loves the dog so much.

And when you said, now split the dog in half. I think that did kind of jar, I would say. So, yeah, we'll go, okay, instead of going, we'll now open the Terrier. So we'll now simply take the golf ball from around the Terriers, the helpful terrier's neck. Yes, yes. Yeah, great. That's great. That's exactly why you have a line read before the rehearsal.

Yeah. So let's book ourselves into debt this done, and then we'll get it in front of back. And I can't see her saying no. When you see it, in theory, I can see how she goes, oh, maybe it's a bit nuff. I think she thinks it would be giggling and mucking around a lot. When she sees how deeply respectful we are, and you can chuck a few boughs in there too,

and a few solemn head nods. What we're going to need, though, is we're going to need cardboard cutouts of guests on the chairs and in the aisles, like, so one for, like, dad or mom, whatever, just to, say if Horgs accidentally hits one of the people, we can just assess how important that person is. I think, because you're right, so much of this is about the stunt, really,

the accuracy he's able to have like chipping a ball down the aisle without hitting the back of someone's head. Or let's face it, the front of their head because people will turn around to watch. Yes. Do we go, you've got one shot at this hogs, and if you hit someone in the head, it's over? Do we go, we want you to see,

we want you to do this 10 times, and you have to make all of them, If he doesn't have to make all of them, what's an acceptable level of error? Do you know? I think he has to do it once. Because that's the pressure on the day. Yeah. Okay.

And maybe the most valued guests could get a helmet or something. Or like the parents. Yeah. Probably, yeah. Just one. We can only afford one helmet. And we will now do the reading. Maybe we can add that in script.

We will now do the reading of who has been deemed helmet-worthy. Mark Lee. You have got one. you've got a full face but then I think Beck's mum should get well Michael Lee No helmet She'd take the mouth card

Her mom would have Haim We've found A little community That come to our show now When they feel deep empathy For an object And they want to tell us about it

Because I know others that listen Also have the same deep feels Extreme Empath is the name of this segment and we have an opener, which includes every single song ever made, so no song feels left out. Beautiful stuff. Maddie. Maddie is the first cab off the rank today.

And she, a lot of, sometimes I feel like the kitchen is the place where people, we have a lot of kitchen-based ones, where people kind of like stuck, whether it's food or like we had that one about the grape that rolled under the fridge. Yes. And then the person, they couldn't get it out, so they rolled another grape under there. they could have a friend.

I think the kitchen is a place where people do imagine that the stuff is coming alive. She's been feeling for her oven. And the reason for this is, she's the rise of the air friar in my household and many other households must be super hard for the ovens of the world to watch. Because the ovens have been there for bloody 100 years. Yep. Really unchecked.

Oh, microwave would. I don't think they can. Oh, I think when the microwave came along, the ovens would have been feeling really intimidated by that. A slight wobble, but not really when you're, no one's cooking a roast in a micro. No. So as the oven, they would have felt, no, no, you can't get rid of me. Nothing can double.

The best meals, yeah. But airfriars, of course, are up to the task. Can you cook a roast in an air fry? Absolutely. Really? And a good way to do it. Anyway, her oven is, she said, look, I find it hard for the old guy, despite it being, less efficient and a bit more messy.

Today I chose to cook my hash browns in the oven. And I kept the air friar on the bench rather than putting it back in the cupboard. I thought it would be a good confidence booster for the oven. So not only does he feel like he's being used, but he can see that I had the choice of using the air friar. And he's reminded, hey, you're actually still important. You came with the house and you've been doing this long before that guy. I like it. This is from Brody.

Ahoy, boys. I like to share how I displayed extreme empathy, not towards an inanimate object, but towards my own eyeballs. Wow. If I see something unpleasant, for example, if I'm travelling in a car

and I see a dead kangaroo, or I'm watching Grey's Anatomy and I see gruesome surgery scene, I tend to feel sorry for my eyeballs and always make sure that I look at something lovely straight after it, like a flower or my dogs. Keep up the custom. I mean, it makes sense except for the part where you think it's your eyeballs

passing on their mood to you. Because, I mean, you can feel down seeing something uncomfortable, so you want to see something better. But it isn't your eyes going, I'm sad. Now, you're sad because you caught my sadness. So make me happy, and I'll make you happy. But I do. I kind of get it.

This is from Jake. My wife and I enjoy watching building and design shows. However, she gets a bit concerned when we watch the show Grand Designs. We often comment on the unique and interesting homes that are featured, but my wife for us that our own home will feel a bit betrayed. To address this issue, my wife compliments our house every time she says something nice about the other houses. Last night, she said, I love what they've done with the kitchen layout, followed by, but I think our kitchen is beautiful too.

Nothing more than feelings. He does go in to say when Ravenswood, Andy's home is finally finished, probably have to go and book a night in a hotel to look at the pictures just because I don't need the house could handle the hearing the jealousy. Hey, I'm from Sarah. This one confronting a little bit. The other day I had some ruthless IBS motions and farted approximately twice every second.

Wow. I'd have to even drum that last. As I got changed at the end of the day, I found myself crangling and apologising to my G-string. For having to withstand all of that action right up there. We're the front room. Hang on for dear life. Like a palm tree in a tornado.

You know it's probably not going to get ripped out, but it is getting battered out there. Nothing more than feeling. Okay, this is from Zach. He's in D.C., Washington, D.C. So I was walking to one of the big museums recently. I really had to use a toilet. So I stopped at another, brackets, mediocre museum on the way.

However, I did feel bad making that museum feel like it was just a bathroom. room stop for me. So I spent a good 30 minutes looking around and nodding before I continued on. Guys, you know the familiar conundrum format, or it might even just be the, you know, the familiar conundrum where it's like, you know, someone's rushed into, were into a hospital, surgeon says, I cannot operate on this boy, is my son or something. And you go, okay, how could that, what's going on there, you know. You like a conundrum.

I love a conundrum. I've got a real-life one. A real-life conundrum. And I thought I'd play it for you guys now, with you guys now. This is the real-life bit. I was with my mum at a cafe near, is this pertinent information? Yeah, I'll give it to you anyway.

Near the kids' cross-country carnival. At a park, you know, not the school nearby. Between the year three and the year six event, we had enough time to go and have a sandwich and a coffee. Okay. So when I had this cafe near the park, my back is facing the door. She is sitting across from me. Suddenly, the blood seems to drain from her face.

And she doesn't drop her fork, because I think she was having a green goddess bowl. It doesn't drop her fork, but her hand goes limp. Like she just caught it. So she's in shock. Okay. And she goes, oh God, what do these guys want? Hmm.

Who had come in behind me? Parking inspectors? No. Because I don't think she'd be scared of them in. They wouldn't be coming in trying to get her. Yeah. You know, they're not really allowed to flex any authority that's non-vehicular. Yeah, that's true.

They can't chase you. They do everything at the car. They never, they never, combat a human. Yeah. They only combat metal cars. They never yell into their like walkie-talkies, officers proceeding on foot.

We're going to tackle this guy. Yeah. And, you know, we'll hunt you down across any border. You are not safe globally. They can't. What if it was, Jack, I'm jumping in twice.

I'll have a go. I think it's just teenagers who look like hoodlums. No. Yeah, right. E-bike gang off their bikes. Again, off their non-vehicle. Oh, God, what are these guys one? Yep, good guess, the kind of thing.

Mom, actually, to her credit, and Defends has never voiced concern about e-bite gangs, but it's the kind of thing where if she brought it up to me, I could imagine her being worried about e-bite gangs. I think, Jack, it is two of the operators slash staff runners of the event, the cross-country. And so they've come in and Kerry's thinking, oh no, they've tracked us down because there's been an accident with one of the kids.

Oh, okay. That's not where my head went. She's saying, oh gosh, what are these guys want? Meaning, oh, no, they're going to give us bad news. Why do they want us to go there? What are these teachers want? Yeah. No.

My head initially in that scenario went to, because the year three race had run and the year six was coming up. I was doing a lot of carb loading strategy. for the kids, and I gave one of the children an energy gel, non-caffeinated, but an energy gel that you would normally use from, you know, I suppose, a manor insurance event. Maybe, and I did tell mum about that, and then maybe mum was worried that that constituted doping or something. Oh, busted.

Oh, yes, you've been busted. Yes, exactly. They've done blood sugar checks. One kid's, yeah, one child's blood was. All sugar. No, it wasn't there. Is it someone she knew? No, but it was from a group she does not like.

Now, that could get dangerous, but I think there was three or four of them. A group, she doesn't. Oh, cyclists, clip-clopping in their micro. Again, Mom. Everyone doesn't like. No, no. They've good on for getting out there and trying their hardest.

A group she doesn't like. tell you because it is hard. The men conundrums are hard. They're meant to give you an aha moment. The way she said it, I thought it was bikies. Right. I thought it was not e-bikis, but motor bikies. I was like, oh, geez, is it like, is it like a salad?

She was really like, oh, God, what are these guys? It was like we're in the Wild West. And, you know, the notorious bad he had come to the saloon. Health inspectors? So she's worried about what she's eating as a salad? Yep, good, again, very good guess. It was four pigeons. We could have played all day.

All day and not got that. Because I turned, I was like, oh shit, in my head I was like, I wonder if I could even look at it would be too obvious. Because she, my does not like birds inside. And I went, she said it so seriously, I'm going to have to have a turn and have a look. I have to protect my mum from biking, hero, you know, or calm the situation down.

Yes. But I turned around with my eyes scanning at human eye level. And I'm like, there's no one here. And then I dropped and saw, and pigeons do strut. And they do strut like they're kind of crime bosses. And so it was four pigeons just strutting in, chests out. And they, because it's sort of like a bigger, more open door, it's not an open and closed door, it's like a wide open door.

So these pigeons would know, we come in here and we get cookie crumbs and toast. Like, we know what we're doing in here. But mum obviously saw that attitude in them and was just like, oh, God. Oh, gosh. No, no, no. Never would any of us have ever got that canadro? I wondered if you'd remember the story, Andy, about mum calling the cops when there was a bird in her house. I did.

I said that's not, even no matter what crime he's committed, we don't do birds. Even if it's stress passing, even if he's, yeah, just intimidating you stalking. we still can't really lay anything on a bird. You have to call her brother. There we go, no points. Jackie got a drone in there somewhere. Have you got like something? I do, yeah.

Suspense, just saying you won't believe what I'm bringing to the show today. It's a segment that just sits there waiting to be filled with good enough examples. Do you know what I'm talking about? It's an interpretation of what you've said that could be gone in 60 seconds. No, it's not. You know what I'm talking about? Incredible drops. We haven't done it for a long time.

But you know what? We're sensible boys. We're sensible boys with this segment because normally shows get a great segment and you drive it into the ground. But from the get-go, we realised incredible drops is too good. This is a very, very precious animal.

Or flower, like those flowers that only flower every 10 years or whatever. Did we do one last year, Carl's at all? Incredible drops? It feels like we haven't done one in years. Because what it does is people... Sometimes that's the way. People submit them and we go, that's a good one.

But you don't want to just do one. You want a few of them in a row, normally three. And so you sit there waiting for another one good enough. The first one was the guy that was walking along with a long neck of Melmiter, I believe, and he dropped it on concrete. Well, after he was sipped it, and as it was returning to its like carrying position because of the condensation on the bottle. slipped out of his hands, rocketed towards the concrete.

Oh, there goes my beer? Wrong. It bounced off the concrete, slipped straight back into his hands. Incredible drop. He kept going. You do not need the catching element of that, but that always stands out in our mind as the gold standard. I'm like, all right, everything has to be in that realm for incredible drops.

I was at the cafe with Henrietta the dog. A guy called Scott came up to me, asked me for a dollar, and I didn't have ones I gave him a bow. And then he said, just by the way, I've submitted an incredible drop. I'm not sure if it's good enough. I went, okay, well, I'll look for it. And I went, and it was on my side of the fence.

And I found Scott's incredible drop, and it was good enough. And then the waiting game happened because this was some months ago. But Scott joins us now. Ahooy to you, Scott. Ahoi, gents. How are we? Lovely to bump into you again. As someone that's seen Andy's bow in the wild,

was it stiff and a little... Week? Oh, anyway, it wasn't, it wasn't too weak, but, mate, I saw him at his local cafe getting some Pesto or getting something out at the cafe there, mate, and I was like, you know what, I'll go up to him and I'll ask for a dollar, but I've got to be honest there, mate, so it was good. Yep, okay. Probably getting Pesto for the dog.

It is a very spoiled dog. Scott, you've got a photo, but I'd like to hear your story first, and then I'll reveal a photo to Hamish and Jack. All right, perfect. All right. So I was at home, I was watching the swans versus the blues. But my partner called me from the couch into the other room. So I start walking from the couch, realizing I've got the remote in my hand.

Right hand, the sides without even thinking, throw back over the left hand side to my left shoulder. Yes. Long way spinning, hits the couch, then from the couch, and that's actually part of the incredible on this is that I actually managed to even hit the couch. Yeah. It's then hit the couch, bounced, blown over onto the coffee table, basically thudded on the coffee table,

slid, and landed basically on the edge of the coffee table, precariously positioned on the corner, facing the TV, perfectly ready for me to come back and keep watching the footy. Now, have a look at the photo now, guys. This is what's incredible about its position. Oh, geez. It's really precarious.

It's on, it's actually like, on the teeter point of balancing on, like, it's exactly what happens in movies when a bus is hanging off the edge of the cliff. And everyone's like slowly walked the back of the bus and make the bus like lean back the other way. Perfectly counter-leavered from the heavy battery pack at its base, allowing a lot more of the front of the bus, the remote, to be hanging over the edge. Scott, did you call your partner in to see it? Oh, mate, I was running around.

I was running around the apartment going, this is unbelievable. I have to submit this. Yes. But then part of the incredibleness is I'm going down to get a coffee and I run into you, Ando, and I'm like, this is meant to be. Yeah. Also, it was within, like, you know, that day or like a couple, you know, that timeframe. Man, I submitted it on Sunday night.

I think it was and I ran into Ando on the Monday. Monday, yeah. I mean, I was meant to be. That is meant to be. That is meant to be. Scott, well done. Thank you for incredible drop. You've kicked up the segment again after a long way off.

We move from Scott to C.J. C.J. Ahoe, boy, Gusto, to you. And to you. And also to you. Thank you, C.J. Take us through the setting for the drop. So it's the middle of the day.

I'm looking to have some lunch. So I decided, you know, I'm going to head to the kitchen, make myself a bit of eggs on toast. So I've popped some toast in the toaster. Started to fry up some eggs, get out the whole one day's sauce, a bit of smoked salmon. You know, I'm really trying to indulge myself here. Yeah, sure.

Now, while everything's happening, everything's sort of cooked, right, I've decided, you know, I've turned myself to the fridge, you get myself a glass of juice, let's make it a four meal. Now, during this time, I say, let's just, time for a bit of CJ time. It's party. Exactly right, exactly right. Now, now, I preface this, our toaster is known to be a bit temperamental and sometimes doesn't want to toast anything and we'll kick it out of the toaster.

Yeah. So it has like a hair trigger, like it stops. Exactly right. It will just, for whatever reason, whether it stops on the timer or decides in the middle of it, it's just going to send it. Now, what happened next? Shock the hell out of me to the point where I almost snap my neck. So I'm opening the fridge. Thank God you do.

I'm being opening the fridge. And I look over because I hear it pops. I'm just making sure it hasn't gone on the floor or anything. I look over and then I look back immediately because the toast is standing completely upright on the edge of the toaster. Oh, wow. Hang on. My God. Yeah.

First of all, smeg-toaster must be nice. Second of all, so two slices of bread. One has failed in its task, and it's just flopped in the regular kind of fashion that we're all used to seeing a piece of bread on its side. Then we see something that we, I can't think that I've ever seen, which is one slice of it looks kind of like a Pelgas or an Abbott's bread on its end. Standing up round. Yep.

On the rim of the toaster. Yep. Stonehenge-like. Everyone wondering how it got there. It's not even being supported by the toast behind it. I've seen a couple of photos through. There's a couple mill behind it. It's going to be my question, yeah, because the other bit of toast is lying down next to it.

So it's no bracketing effect. No bracketing whatsoever. No support. It is loan-free on the edge. It must have looked to you like when people do that funny thing where they jump into a pool but then play the video and reverse. And it would take your jumping out of the pool. It's like a real life one of those.

Yeah. I stood there looking at this thing for that long. The fridge was left open and the fridge started to beep. Yeah. A gentle reminder that even in the face of a miracle, life must go on. Yeah, exactly. CJ, well done. Thank you for submitting.

I really appreciate it. Thanks, boys. Appreciate it. I've got time for one. more. Ben, you've got an incredible drop. You submitted this. How long ago did you submit this? I was, towards the end of the last year. Yeah, okay. November, something like that. Talk us through your incredible drop. So the family and I were enjoying a nice family day at Hillsville Sanctuary. My sister and I, my sister Michaela and I,

decided that we needed icy poles for ourselves and the kids. And go hot up there. And unlike me, she wasn't as careful with her icy pole. It was a size. I don't know if you remember those ones. Oh, yeah, yeah. Just such a good icy ball. Anyway, so Michaela opens up the icy pole, drops it in the dirt, but it lands stick down,

facing vertically with the icy pole completely free of any dirt. She just picked it up and ate it, off you go. That's unbelievable. The chances, the weight distribution to on the cyclone, because look, as much as the manufacturer can't remember if it streets or Peters, would love to tell you that the,

Stick is inserted right through the centre of gravity. It isn't. You often get a lopsided icy pole. So for that to land and stick is amazing. I would have thought it would have kind of talked. So if people don't know this icy pole, it obviously is standard Christmas tree with a stalk at the bottom and then the icy pole at the top of it.

But it is circular all the way around. It's a cylinder, yeah, and two colours twist around the outside. You would expect it to torpedo heavy side down, if anything. Yeah. Yeah, that's what you'd think. And she, as soon as it happened, I just froze in flights because I couldn't believe what it just happened. And then she asked me what the hell I was doing because, of course, I got my phone out straight away to start writing down incredible drop. Yeah.

And yeah, I was blown away. Couldn't believe it. Perfectly unharmed icy pole. Look, to like a little garden patch growing those cyclone icy poles. I'm just trying to think if the aerodynamics of the cyclone around the side, if it gave it some sort of stable. effect that it was twisting in the air, like a bullet spinning because it's rifled. Yep. It's a great drop.

It's an incredible drop. Thank you, Ben. Appreciate it, buddy. Thank you, gentlemen. Gusto to you. In a lot of crime dramas, Ham, there's often a very unprepared lawyer walking very fast into a courtroom and they're normally representing someone that can't afford legal representation.

Gotcha. Flustered. They're flustered. They're getting pasted. They're getting past all the details, and then they're straight into the court and they're having to defend someone. Yep.

I'm about to accuse Beck of something. I want you to be her lawyer, and you're going to hear this as it happens. Great. And I've got Beck standing by. Hello, Beck. Hello. I can't believe I've been wrote into one of these again.

I don't know why you answered, Beck. As your lawyer, I would have advised you not to, young lady, but you're here. The judge has seen you, and we would like to, before we even hear one. what the charge is, we'd like to say how offended we are that the charge is being bought, and that we plead absolutely not guilty. Hey, Beck.

Yes. You know how your car got robbed and the garage buzzer to our apartment got taken? Yep. You don't have to answer that. You don't have to answer that, Beck. I couldn't find my garage buzzer in my car this morning. So did you take that? Um, yes.

Yes, I do. Again, we approach the bench. It feels like we might have just had an admission. So, were you going to give that back? Or, irrelevant.

As another question, when you did get robbed several weeks ago, and I said, please talk to the building manager getting another remote. Have you? Objection, pestering. My client does not wish to be pested.

Well, I'll rephrase. Have you asked the building manager for a replacement remote control for you? No, because I've got yours. It sounds like you're the kind of guy that since you've got all these great ideas about the remote control, we would like to suggest to the court that since Beck is the victim of crime here and is reeling from that, and you seem to be the one with all the great remote control ideas. Why don't you, why doesn't her remote? Yeah, why doesn't it stay as hers?

And you get a chance to firsthand do all these cool ideas you've been coming up with about how to get more remotes. Well, if you mind if I ask your client, was that your expectation, Beck? Never. She never would have done that. Yeah, yeah. No, no, but game makes a very good point.

That's why I'm paying him the big. When I get home, for instance, now what I have to do is park on the street, go down the elevator, manually open the garage, run back up and try and get down in the time it takes for the roller door to go up and down. Your Honor, and I assume you're the judge here. You would have to do that, Your Honor, Your Honor, my client is suggesting that Beck, a young woman would have to leave the safety of her vehicle and run this gauntlet. also I'd like it to be known that the prosecution, Mr Lee,

has a history of enjoying games and sports. I actually thought the same thing. It seems like something he would like to challenge himself over. It seems like my client has inadvertently handed him extra entertainment in his day for which we would like the son of $50.

All right, Beck. So am I going to the building manager? You remember? Yes, you are. You're going to the building manager. Beck's keeping the remote and you're giving you a $50 for giving you a fun new game.

Thank you so much. Title pleasure. That's why I got into this game. I'm glad I answered this phone call. That's how most of the... You got ready's number, sweetie? I know I'll call him. I already know it is because I went and got mine recalibrated,

so it matched the new remote signal because yours got stolen and everyone in the entire apartment building had to get theirs recalibrated. And I thought you... That is not my fault. Sounds like another fun game you were given. $100, please, to the defendant. See you, Becca. Bye, thanks, thank you.

Total pleasure. Thanks for listening. The Hamish and Andy podcast will return next week. Catch up or contribute at hamish and Andy.com.